King of Battle and Blood

ThankyoufordownloadingthisSourcebookseBook!
Youarejustoneclickawayfrom…
?Beingthefirsttohearaboutauthorhappenings
?VIPdealsandsteals
?Exclusivegiveaways
?Freebonuscontent
?Earlyaccesstointeractiveactivities
?Sneakpeeksatournewesttitles
Happyreading!
CLICKHERETOSIGNUP
BooksChangeLivesCopyright?2021byScarlettSt.Clair
Coverandinternaldesign?2021bySourcebooks
CoverdesignbyReginaWamba/ReginaWamba.com
Coverimages?TimurD/AdobeStock,4Girls1Boy/AdobeStock,NikhomTreeVector/AdobeStock
Internalimages?Godruma/GettyImages,ONYXprj/GettyImages,Photoco/GettyImages,ulimi/GettyImages
SourcebooksandthecolophonareregisteredtrademarksofSourcebooks.BloomBooksisatrademarkofSourcebooks.
Allrightsreserved.Nopartofthisbookmaybereproducedinanyformorbyanyelectronicormechanicalmeansincludinginformationstorageandretrievalsystems—exceptinthecaseofbriefquotationsembodiedincriticalarticlesorreviews—withoutpermissioninwritingfromitspublisher,Sourcebooks.
Thecharactersandeventsportrayedinthisbookarefictitiousorareusedfictitiously.Anysimilaritytorealpersons,livingordead,ispurelycoincidentalandnotintendedbytheauthor.
Allbrandnamesandproductnamesusedinthisbookaretrademarks,registeredtrademarks,ortradenamesoftheirrespectiveholders.Sourcebooksisnotassociatedwithanyproductorvendorinthisbook.
PublishedbyBloomBooks,animprintofSourcebooks
P.O.Box4410,Naperville,Illinois60567-4410
(630)961-3900
sourcebooks.com
Cataloging-in-PublicationDataisonfilewiththeLibraryofCongress.Contents
FrontCover
TitlePage
Copyright
One
Two
Three
Four
Five
Six
Seven
Eight
Nine
Ten
Eleven
Twelve
Thirteen
Fourteen
Fifteen
Sixteen
Seventeen
Eighteen
Nineteen
Twenty
ExcerptfromAGameofFate
Author’sNote
AbouttheAuthor
BackCoverToAshley
Wholovedthisbook
beforeitwasevenwritten.One
Therewasanarmyofvampiresencampedontheoutskirtsofmyfather’skingdom.Theblacktopsoftheirtentslookedlikeanoceanofsharpwavesandseemedtostretchformiles,meldingwitharedhorizonthatwastheskythatextendedoverRevekka,theEmpireoftheVampire.IthadbeenthatcolorsinceIwasborn.ItwassaidtobecursedbyDis,thegoddessofspirit,towarnoftheevilthatwasbirthedthere—theevilthatbeganwiththeBloodKing.UnfortunatelyforCordova,theredskydidnotfollowevil,sotherewasnowarningwhenthevampiresbegantheirinvasion.
Theyhadmanifestedwestoftheborderlastnight,asifthey’dtraveledwiththeshadows.Sincethen,everythinghadbeenquietandstill.Itwasliketheirpresencehadstolenlife;noteventhewindstirred.Uneasecreptthroughmychestlikeacoldfrost,settlingdeepinmystomachasIstoodbetweenthetrees,onlyafewfeetfromthefirstrowoftents.Icouldnotshakethefeelingthatthiswastheend.Itloomedbehindme,longfingersgrippingmyshoulders.
Rumorshadprecededtheirarrival.Rumorsofhowtheirleader—Ihatedtoeventhinkhisname—AdrianAleksandrVasilievhadleveledJola,ravishedElin,conqueredSiva,andburnedLita.Onebyone,theNineHousesofCordovawerefalling.Nowthevampireswereonmydoorstep,andinsteadofcallingarms,myfather,KingHenri,hadaskedforameeting.
HewantedtoreasonwiththeBloodKing.
Myfather’sdecisionhadbeenmetwithmixedemotions.Somewishedtofightratherthansuccumbtothismonster’sreign.Otherswereuncertain—hadmyfathertradeddeathonthebattlefieldforanotherkind?
Atleastinbattle,thereweretruths.Youeithersurvivedthedayordied.
Undertheruleofamonster,therewerenotruths.
“Ishouldnothaveallowedyoutocomesolateorgetthisclose.”
CommanderAlecKillianstoodtoonear,justahairbehindme,shoulderbrushingmyback.Ifitwereanyotherday,Iwouldhaveexcusedhisproximity,attributingittohisdedicationasmyescort,butIknewotherwise.
Thecommanderwastryingtomakeamends.
Itookastepaway,turningslightly,bothtocasthimasullenlookandtocreatedistance.Alec—orKillian,asIpreferredtocallhim—wascommanderoftheRoyalGuard,havinginheritedthepositionwhenhisfather,whosenamehealsoshared,passedunexpectedlythreeyearsago.
Hereturnedmygaze,grayeyesbothsteelyandsomehowgentle.IthinkI’dhavepreferredonlythesteel,becausethetendernessmademewanttotaketwomorestepsback.Itmeanthehadfeelingsforme,andanyexcitementI’doncehadatcatchinghisattentionhadnowevaporated.
Outwardly,hewaseverythingIthoughtI’dwantedinaman—ruggedlyhandsomewithabodyforgedbyhoursoftraining.Hisuniform,atailorednavytunicandtrouserswithgoldembellishmentsandaridiculouslydramaticgoldcape,servedtoaccentuatehispresence.Hehadacrownofthick,darkhair,andI’dspentafewtoomanynightswiththosestrandswrappedaroundmyfingers,bodywarmed,butnotalightwiththepassionI’dreallylongedfor.Intheend,CommanderKillianwasamediocrelover.IthadnothelpedthatIdidnotlikehisbeard,whichwaslongandcoveredthebottomhalfofhisface.Itmadeitimpossibletodetecttheshapeofhisjaw,butIguessedhehadastrongonethatmatchedhispresence—whichwasbeginningtograteonmynerves.
“Ioutrankyou,Commander.Itisnotwithinyourpowertotellmewhattodo.”
“No,butitiswithinyourfather’s.”
Anotherflushofirritationblastedupmyspine,andIgroundmyteeth.WhenKilliandidnotfeellikehecouldhandleme,hedefaultedtousingthethreatofmyfather.AndhewonderedwhyIdidnotwanttosleepwithhimanymore.
Insteadofacknowledgingmyanger,Killiansmirked,pleasedthathe’dhitanerve.
Henoddedtowardthecamp.“Weshouldattackinthedaylightwhiletheysleep.”
“ExceptyouwouldbedefyingFather’sordersforpeace,”Isaid.
Once,Iwouldhaveagreedwithhim—whynotslaughterthevampireswhiletheyslept?Thesunlight,afterall,wastheirweakness.ExceptthatTheodoric,kingofJola,hadorderedhissoldierstodotheverysame,andbeforetheycouldevenlaunchtheirattack,theentirearmywasvanquishedbysomethingthepeoplewerecallingthebloodplague.Thosewhohadcomedownwiththediseasebledfromeveryorificeoftheirbodyuntildeath,includingKingTheodoricandhiswife,whonowleftatwo-year-oldtoinheritthethroneundertheruleoftheBloodKing.
Asitturnedout,sunlightdidnotstopmagic.
“Willtheyhaveasmuchrespectforuswhennightfalls?”Killiancountered.ThecommanderhadnotbeenshyaboutexpressinghisopinionabouttheBloodKingandhisinvasionofCordova.Iunderstoodhishatred.
“Havefaithinthesoldiersyoutrained,Commander.Haveyounotpreparedforthis?”
Iknewhedidnotlikemyreply.Icouldfeelhisfrownatmyback,becausewebothknewifthevampiresdecidedtoattack,weweredead.Ittookfiveofourowntobringdownoneofthem.WesimplyhadtotrustthattheBloodKing’swordtomyfatherwasworthourpeople’slives.
“Noonecanprepareformonsters,Princess,”Killiansaid.Ibrokefromhisgazeandfocusedontheking’stent,distinctwithitscrimsonandgolddetails,asheadded,“IdoubteventhegoddessDisknewwhatwouldbecomeofhercurse.”
ItwassaidAdrianangeredDis,goddessofspirit,andasaresult,shecursedhimtocraveblood.Hercursespread—somehumanssurvivedthetransformationtovampirewhileothersdidnot.Sincetheirincarnation,theworldhadnotknownpeace.Theirpresencehadbredothermonsters—allkindsthatfedonblood,onlife.WhileIhadneverknownanythingdifferent,oureldersdid.Theyrememberedaworldwithouthighwallsandgatesaroundeveryvillage.Theyrememberedwhatitwaslikenottofearwanderingbeneaththestarsasdarknessfell.
Ididnotfearthedark.
Ididnotfearthemonsters.
IdidnotevenfeartheBloodKing.
ButIdidfearformyfather,formypeople,formyculture.
BecauseAdrianAleksandrVasilievwasinevitable.
“Youpresumetoknowhowagoddessthinks?”Iasked.
“Youkeepchallengingme.DidIdosomethingwrong?”
“Didyouexpectcomplacencybecausewefucked?”
Heflinched,andhisbrowsslammeddownoverhiseyes.Finally,Ithought.Anger
“Soyou’reupset,”hesaid.
Irolledmyeyes.“OfcourseI’mupset.YouconvincedmyfatherIneededanescort.”
“Yousneakoutofyourbedroomatnight!”
IhadnoideathatsleepingwithKillianwouldmeanunannouncedvisitstomybedroom.Except,likealways,heoversteppedonenightandfoundmyroomempty.He’dwokenthewholecastle,hadanentirearmysearchingthesurroundingforestforme.AllI’dwantedtodowaswatchthestars,andI’ddonesoforyearsatoptherollinghillsofLara.Butallthatendedaweekago.AfterIwasfound,myfatherhadsummonedmetohisstudy.He’dlecturedmeonthestateoftheworldandtheimportanceofwatchfulnessandhadgivenmeguardsandacurfew.
I’dprotested.Iwaswelltrained,awarrior,justascompetentasKillian.Icouldprotectmyself,atleastwithinthebordersofLara.
Don’t,myfatherhadsnapped.Thewordwassoharshandsudden,Ijumped.Afteraquietmomentandabreath,hehadadded,Youaretooimportant,Issi.
Andinthatmoment,he’dlookedsobroken,Ihadn’tbeenabletoutteranotherword—nottohim,nottoKillian.
Aweeklater,andIwasfeelingtrapped.
“Sinceyouaresokeentospillmysecrets,Commander,didyouadmittofuckingmetoo?”
“Stopusingthatword.”
Hespokewithclenchedteeth.
Atleasthewaspassionateaboutsomething,Ithought.Still,hisorderonlyservedtoprovokeme.
“AndwhatwordshouldIuse?”Ihissed.“Makelove?Hardly.”Iwasbeingunkind,butwhenIwasangry,Iwantedtherecipientofmywrathtofeelit,andIknewKilliandid.ItwasatraitI’dadoptedfrommymother,giventhatmyfatherrarelyexpressedhisfrustration.“Youseemtothinkwhathappenedbetweenusmeanssomethingmore.”
Itwaslikehethoughthewassuddenlyentitledtome,andIhatedit.
“AmIsoterrible?”heasked,hisvoicequiet.
Myfistsclenched,andtherewasamomentwhenguiltclutchedatmychest.Ishookitoffquickly.“Stoptryingtomanipulatemywords.”
“I’mnottryingtomanipulateyou,butyoucannotsayyoudidnotenjoyourtimetogether.”
“Ienjoysex,Alec,”Isaidflatly.“Butitdoesn’tmeananything.”
Theyweresloppywords,butImeantthem.I’donlychosentosleepwithKillianbecausehe’dbeenthere,andI’dwantedrelease.Thathadbeenmyfirstmistake.Becauseitmademeignoreotherwarnings,likehistendencytokeepmyfatherawareofmyeverymove.
“Youdon’tmeanthat,”hesaid.
“Killian.”Hisnameslippedfrommymouth,awarning.Hewasn’tlistening,andiftherewasonethingIhated,itwasamanconvincedthatIdidn’tknowmyownmind.“Whenwillyoulearn?IalwayssaywhatImean.”
Istartedtosteparoundhim,andKillianreachedformyhand.Iwrenchedfreeandpunchedhiminthestomach.HegroanedandfelltohiskneesasIturnedonmyheels.
“Isolde!”hehuffed.“Whereareyougoing?”
Ikeptwalkingintothethickwood;theleavesweresoftbeneathmyfeet,stillwetfrommorningdew.Iwisheditwerethemiddleofspring,whenthetreeswerelushandgreen.Icoulddisappearmucheasierthen.Instead,Iwalkedbetweenpale,skeletaltrunks,beneathacanopyofinterlacedlimbs.Still,IwascertainIcouldloseKillian.IknewthesewoodslikeIknewmyheart.Iwouldmakeitbacktothecastlewithouthim,muchasIhadintendedtodobeforehefollowedmetotheborder.
“Idiot,”Ibreathed.
Myjawachedfromclenchingmyteeth.IdidnothateKillian,butIwouldnotacceptbeingcaged.Iwaswellawareofthedangersintheworld,andI’dbeenraisedtofighteverymannerofmonster,evenvampires.ThoughIwasnomatchforthem,atleastIknewit.IfitwereuptoKillian,ourarmieswouldbebattlingthevampiresrightnow,andlikely,manyofourpeoplewouldbedead.
Ashumans,wehadnocuretofighttheirdiseases,noabilitytooutrunthem,nowaytocountertheirmagicorthemonstersthey’dawakened.Wewerelesser,andwewouldalwaysbeunlessoneofthegoddessesansweredthemanyandvariedprayersofferedbythedevout—whichwasunlikely.
Thegoddesseshadabandoneduslongago,andsometimesIfeltliketheonlypersonwhoknewit.
Mypacelessenedasthesmellofdecaypermeatedtheair.Atfirst,itwasfaint,andforabriefmoment,IthoughtIwasimaginingthings.
Then,thecoldcreptupmyback,andIstopped.
Astrzygawasnear.
Strzygawerehumanswhohaddiedfromthebloodplagueandrisenfromthedead.Theywerehorrifyingcreatureswithlittleintellect,savefortheirdesiretoeathumanflesh.
Thesmellgrewinpotency,andIflexedmyhand,turningslowlytofacethedesiccatedmonster.
Itstoodontheedgeoftheclearing,backbent,staringwithholloweyesandcheeks.Itssparsehairclungtobloodspatteredonitsnear-skeletalface.Itstaredatmeandthensniffedtheair,agrowleruptingfromitsthroatasitslipscurledbacktoshowelongatedteeth.Thenitgaveaneeriecryasitfellonallfoursandracedtowardme.
Ispreadmyfeetapart,preparingfortheimpactofitsblow.Itlauncheditselfatme,andasitneared,Ishovedmyhandtowardit,deployingaknifeIkeptsheathedinabracearoundmywrist.Itsankeasilybetweenthecreature’sribs.Justasquickly,Ipushedaway,retractingmyblade.Bloodspatteredmyfaceasthestrzygastaggeredback,screamingatme,angryandanguished.
Theblowwouldonlywound.
Tokillastrzyga,itsheadmustbeseparatedfromitsbodythenburned.
Nowthatthemonsterwasweakened,Idrewmysword.Asthesharpmetalsangagainstmysheath,thecreaturehisseditshatredbeforethrowingitselfatmeagain.Itsankuponmyblade,clawedhandslashing,tearingatmydressandskin.Igaveagutturalcryasthepainregistered,butitwassoonovertakenbyangerandadrenaline.Iwithdrewtheswordandswung.Theedgewassharpbutresisted,lodgingintheboneofthestrzyga’sneck.Ishovedmyfootagainstitschestandjerkedmybladefree.Asthestrzygafell,Islicedthroughitsneckagain,andwhenthebodyhittheground,itsheadlandedafewfeetaway.
Istoodforamoment,breathinghard,mychestburningwherethecreaturehadshreddedmyskin.Ineededtogettothemedics.Infectionsetinquicklywithstrzygawounds.BeforeIbeganmytrek,Ikickedthestrzyga’shead,sendingitrollingtothetreelineoftheclearing.
Returningtothecastleinjuredwouldnotbodewellformeandmyindependence.
Theairchangedsuddenly,andItwisted,liftingmybladeoncemore,onlytohaveitconnectwithanother.
Theimpactsurprisedme,becauseIstoodface-to-facewithaman.Hewasbeautiful,striking,butinaharshway.Hisfeatureswereangled—highcheekbones,sharpjawline,astraightnose,allframedbyblondhairthatfellinsoftwavespasthisshoulders.Hislipswerefullandpillowy,andhiseyeswerehoodedbydefinedbrows.Itwasthosestrangeeyes—blue,rimmedwithwhite—thatheldmineashetiltedhisheadandspoke.
“Whatareyoudoingallthewayouthere?”Hisvoicehintedatintrigue,silkyinitsdelivery,andthesoundmademystomachclench.
Mybrowsloweredathiswords,andIstudiedhimfurther.Heworeablacktunicsecuredwithgoldbucklesandasurcoatofthesamecolor.Theedgeswerestitchedwithgoldthread.Itwasfinework,butitwasnotmadebymypeople—ourdesignswerefarmoreintricate.
Inarrowedmyeyes.“Whoareyou?”Iasked.
Themandroppedhissword,asifhenolongerperceivedmeasathreat,whichmademewanttobeathreat,exceptthatIdroppedmyarmtoo,myfingersloosearoundthehilt.Itriedtotightenmyholdbutcouldn’t.
“Iammanythings,”hesaid.“Man,monster,lover.”
Thistimewhenhespoke,Idetectedafaintaccent—aslightclipIcouldn’tplace.
“That’snotananswer,”Isaid.
“Ithinkwhatyoumeanisthat’snottheansweryouwant.”
“Youaretoyingwithme.”
Hissmilestretched,andhelookedwickedinasinfulway,inawayIwantedtotasteandfeel.Thosethoughtsmademyskinprick,andIfeltmyselfgrowingwarmerbeneathhisgaze.
“Whatisityouwantfromme?”heasked.Hisvoicewaslow,apurrthatcoaxedashiverfromthedepthsofmystomach.
Iswallowedhard.“Iwanttoknowwhyyou’rehere.”
“Iwastrackingthestrzygawhenitchangedcourse.”Hiseyesloweredtomychest.“Iseewhy.”
Self-consciously,Iliftedmyhandandhissedatthestingofmyshreddedskin.Thesuddenflareofpainmademefeellight-headed.
“Ikilledit,”Imanagedtosay,thoughmytonguefeltthickinmymouth.
Thecornersofhislipscurled.“Iseethattoo.”
“Ishouldgo,”Iwhispered,holdinghisgaze.Iwantedtomovemybodybutfelttoorelaxed.Perhapsitwasinfection,alreadyrootedinmyblood.
“Youshould,”heagreed.“Butyouwon’t.”
Analarmsoundedinmyheadashespoke.Andashesteppedtowardme,Isuddenlyregainedmyabilitytomove.Idrovemyhandtowardhisstomach,releasingmyknife,buthishandclampeddownuponmywrist.Heyankedmeforward,hisbodypressingintomine,despitemywound,despitetheblood.Hebentoverme,graspingmyhead,fingersdiggingintomyscalp,andforamoment,Ifearedthathewouldeitherkissmeorbreakmyneck.Instead,hegrippedmeharder,eyesneverleavingmine,thumbbrushingmylips.
“Whatisyourname?”heasked.Hisvoiceshiveredthroughme,andIfoundmyselfspeaking.
“IamIsolde.”Theanswerslippedfrommymouth,atwarwithmymind,whichragedagainsthim.
“Whoareyou?”
Again,Ianswerednotofmyownaccord,myvoicethewhisperofalover.“IamprincessoftheHouseofLara.”
“Isolde,”herepeatedmyname,aroughgrowlthatvibratedagainstmychest.“Mysweet.”
Thenhebent,andhistonguesweptacrossthewoundonmychest.Icouldn’tbreathe,Icouldn’tmove,andIcouldn’tspeak.Theworstpartwasthatthisfeltgood.Itfeltpossessiveandimmoral,andIfoundmyselfnolongertryingtostabhimbutclingingtohimasheworked.
Whenhedrewaway,hisfulllipswerestainedwithmyblood.Heswallowed,andhiseyesgleamedashestudiedmyeyes,mylips,mythroat.Thestareignitedsomethingdeepinsideme,andthefirespread,makingmeache.Iwasashamed,becauseIknewthismanwasasoldierfortheBloodKing,avampire.
Ijerkedinhisgraspandwassurprisedwhenhereleasedme.Istumbledback,myhandgoingtomychest,meetingsmoothskin.Iwashealed.
“You’reamonster.”
“Ihealedyou,”hesaid,asifthatmadehimlessso.
“Ididn’taskforyourhelp,”Isnapped.
“No,butyouenjoyedit.”
Iglared.“Youwerecontrollingme.”
ThatwaswhyIhadn’tbeenabletogripmysword,whymybodyseemedtobeatoddswithmymind,whyIsuddenlyfeltdesperatetobecrushedbeneaththeweightofawarmbodythatcouldfillmebetterthananythingI’deverhadbefore.Iwasoutofcontrol.
Anditwashisfault.
“Idonotcontrolemotions.”Hespokesomatter-of-factly,itwashardtoaccusehimoflying.
Iliftedmyblade,andthevampirelaughed.
“Angersuitsyou,mysweet.Ilikeit.”
Iscowled,butmyangerjustmadehimsmilewider,hislipspullingbackfromgleamingwhiteteeth,nosignthathe’djustfeastedonmyblood.Myhatredforhimdeepened.
“Itisstilldaylight,”Isaid.“Howareyouabletowalkamongus?”
VampirescouldonlygooutduringthedayinRevekka,wheretheredskyblockedthesun’srays.Weretheyevolving?Thethoughtbroughtanewkindofdreadintothepitofmystomach.
“Itisnearlysunset,”hesaid.“Thistimeisnotsodangerousforsomeonelikeme.”
Whatdidthatmean?
Ididnotask,andhedidnotofferanexplanation.Instead,heinclinedhishead.“We’llmeetagain,PrincessIsolde.I’llmakesureofit.”
Hispromiseshiveredthroughmelikeanoathhe’dsworntothegoddessesthemselves.Iliftedmybladeandcharged,butasIswung,hevanishedlikemistinthemorningsun.
Alone,Ibegantoshake.
I’dsurvivedanencounterwithavampirewhohadtastedmyblood,andtheworstpartaboutitwasthathe’dbeenright.
Ididlikeit.Two
Ihadseenvictimsofvampires—humanswhowereonthecuspofchangebeforetheirheartswerecutfromtheirbodiesandburned.I’dalsoseenbodiesdrainedofblood,pastthepointofsurvival.ButI’dneverencounteredanactualvampire.
“Theylooklikeusbutarenotus,”Killian’sfatherhadwarnedduringtraining.“Theyarefast.Theywillcontrolyourmindanddrinkyourblood,andyouwillnotsurvive.Ifyoudo,youwillwishfordeath.”
ThosewerethetruthsI’dbeentoldaboutvampires.
He’dneversaidhowtheywerelikeus—thattheycouldbebeautiful,thattheirtouchwouldinspireanacutedesirebeyondanythingI’deverexperienced.Everythinginsidemewaswoundsotight,eachbreathwasareminderofhowdesperatelyIwantedtobetouched.
“Isolde!”
Butnotbyhim.
Killian’svoicebrokethroughthefogofmymind.Hewasclose,andIdidnotwanttobecaught.Therewastoomuchtoexplainhereinthisclearing—thestrzyga,mytorndress,theabsenceofblood.
Iturnedonmyheelsandfled.
Thecastlefeltlikeithaddoubledindistance.Thewalkwasagonizing,andIgrewfrustrated,stillfeelingtheeffectsofmyencounterwiththevampire.Mybodywaswarm,especiallybetweenmythighs,andIwashyperawareofhowheavyandsensitivemybreastsfelt,rubbedrawbythewoolencloakIkeptclose.BythetimeIexitedthetreeline,Iached.
Thiswastorture.
Wasthatwhatthiswas?Somecruelformofwarfare?
Iskirtedthehigh,stonewallsthatroseominouslyandcastmeinachillshadow.Thewallswereacomplexsystemofforts,bastions,andtowersthatran,uninterrupted,encirclingHighCityofLaraandCastleFiora.They’dbeenbuiltovertwohundredyearsago,afterthebirthofthemonstersinCordova—thestartoftheDarkEra.TherewerefourgatesthatallowedentranceintoHighCity.Twowereactuallyuseful,onefortradethatledintotheheartofthecity.Theotherwasfordiplomatsandofferedapleasingroutealongcobbleroadstothegleamingwhitetowersofthecastle.
Theothertwogatesweresymbolic.OnewasforAsha,goddessoflife,theotherforDis,goddessofspirit.Once,theywouldhaveopenedatdawn,markingthewakingofthecity,symbolizingthebalanceoflifeanddeath.Butsincethebirthofthevampires,Dis’sgateremainedsealed,adecisionthathadbeenmadebythekingsoftheNineHousesoveronehundredandfiftyyearsago.TherewereafewpriestessesofDiswhoadmonishedthedecision,claimingthattheplagueofthemonsterswouldonlygrowworse—andtheyhadn’tbeenwrong.ItwaswhyallvillagesacrosstheNineHouseshadhighwallsandgatesthatclosedbeforesunsetanddidnotopenuntilsunrise.
Exceptfortonight.
Tonight,thegateswouldopentoallowtheBloodKingandhispeoplewithinourwalls.Itwouldbethefirsttimesincetheywerebuiltthatthegateswouldremainopen.
Iapproachedtheonefordiplomats.Usually,Ilikedtoenterthroughthetradegateandmeanderthroughthestreets,visitingmyfavoritevendorsforflowersandmeatpies,butsincemyencounterinthewood,Ineededtochangeandtimetomyself.
“Princess,”oneoftheguardsatthegatesaid.HisnamewasNicolae.Hewasyoung,hisfacedoughyandpale.Theother,whowassilentandstoic,wasnamedLascar.Hewasoliveskinnedandlarge,hisbodyalmosttoobigforthesentryboxbehindhim.BothsoldierswerenewtotheRoyalGuard.Ilikedthenewrecruitsbecausetheywereeasytosway;allIhadtodowassmile,stroketheirego,andthey’dpretendtheyneversawmeslippingoutsidethegatesatnight.
Thatwasbeforethey’dallbeenrousedinthemiddleofthenightlastweektofindme,beforethetwoguardswho’dletmeslipbyweredishonorablydischargedandrelegatedtothedutiesofastablehand.
“Returningwithoutescort,Isee,”Nicolaesaid.Hetriedtosoundstern,buthehadtoomuchlightinhiseyesforthat.
“CommanderKillianstayedattheborder,”Isaid.
Nicolae’seyesshiftedovermyshoulder,andheraisedadarkbrow.“Didhe?”
Iturned,spyingKillianashecameoutofthetreeline.Hisabsurdcapeflutteredmenacinglybehindhim.
IquicklyturnedbacktoNicolaeandsmiled.“Hemusthavechangedhismind.”
“Doyouneedescortto—”
“No,”Icuthimoff,andtosoftentheblow,Iplacedmyhanduponhisshoulder,holdingmycloaktightlywiththeother.“Thankyou,Nicolae.”
IhurriedthroughthegatesandwasimmediatelygreetedbythetoweringfigureoftheSanctuaryofAshaontheright.Thestonewaswhiteandbrilliant,thecolorsofthehand-paintedstainedglassvibrant.OppositethestructurewasthecrumblingedificethatwastheSanctuaryofDis.Thebuildingitselflookedlikeashadow,craftedfromvolcanicrockimportedfromtheIslandsofSt.Amand.Thewindowsthatweren’tbrokenorboardedweredark,pointed,andlead-paned.Despiteitsruinedappearance,itwasstilloccupiedbyafewpriestesses,butbecauseveryfewvisitedandthepriestesseswereonlycalledwhendeathwasnear,theyhadnomoneyforupkeep.
IkeptanequaldistancefrombothasIpassed,havingneverfeltinclinedtoworshipeithergoddess.Myfatherwouldcriticizeme,butIhadnodesiretooffermyloyalty—nottotheonewhobroughtmonsterstoourworldnortotheotherwholetithappen.
Beyondthesanctuaries,therewasaseriesofbeautifulplasterbuildings—acombinationofhomes,shops,andinns—allwiththatchedroofsandwindowboxesfullofcolorfulflowers.Beyondthatwasashortwallthatmarkedthestartoftheroyalgrounds.Alineoftreesofferedprivacytothoseofthecourtwhowishedtousethegardensforexerciseorgames.Sinceitwasnearingsunset,mostwereindoors,forwhichIwasthankful.Theladiesofthecourtfawnedoverme.Ilikedmanyofthem,butIfoundithardtotellwhowasgenuineintheirattention,giventhatIsuspectedmanyonlywantedmyfavorbecauseIwouldbequeenoneday.
Icrossedthewideyardandedgedalongthecastlewalltowardtheback,enteringthroughtheservant’squarterstoavoidbeingpulledintoneedleworkandgossipabouttheBloodKing.Iheadedupanarrowstaircasejusttotheleftoftheentrance,thefrictionofmythighsalmostunbearable.Iwassofrustrated,bothbythedesireburninglowinmystomachandbywhatevermagicstillhaditsclawsinsideme.HowcouldIpossiblystillbesoconsumedbythisdesperateneedforrelease?Flightafterflight,Igrewmoreheated,mymindwanderingtohowthevampirehadheldmyhead,howhe’dtouchedmylipsanddrewwordsfrommymouth.Iwonderedwhatothersoundshemightcoaxfrommythroatasthosefingersexploredothersensitiveandswollenpartsofmybody.
Yourthoughtsaredisgusting,IchidedandthenmorekindlyremindedmyselfthatIwasonlythinkingthosethingsbecauseIwasundersomespell.
Aftersixflightsofstairs,Imadeittomyroom.Onceinside,Ileanedagainstthepricklywoodendoor.I’dheldmybreathformostofmyascent,becauseIcouldn’tstopthinkingaboutsexandthevampirewholookedlikesomekindofbeautifulsaviorbutwasreallyamonster.Ithoughtofhimnowasmyhanddrifteddownmystomachtomycenter,wheremyswollenclitrosetomeetthebrushofmyhand.Igroanedandgroundintomyhand,desperatetofeelpleasurethreadthroughmybody,desperatetocomesothatImightalsoreleasetheimageofthisvampireandhismagic.Thiswaswhathewanted—todrivemetothismoment—andhehaddonenothingtoearnit.Hehadn’tspokeneroticthings,kissedme,orcaressedmyskin,andyethisfacecametomymind,unbidden.
Myfrustrationwaspalpable,andIthoughtIcouldhearhislaughechoinmymind—theonehe’dofferedintheclearing,amused,dark,arrogant.
Bythegoddess,Ihatedhim.
IgatheredmyskirtsintomyhandsuntilIcouldfeelthecurlsattheapexofmythighs,thenthepadofmyfingersbrushedagainstmyclit.Itstrainedagainstmytouch,sensitivewithneed,stillsotight,practicallypreening.Iheldmybreathasmyfingersdriftedclosertotheheatandslicknessofmycore,andIsworeI’dneverbeensowet.
Ithastobemagic,Ithought,andyetmystomachknottedwithtension,shame,andguilt.
Idrewmymiddlefingerdownmyopening,gatheringtheslickness—beforeaknockeruptedfrombehindme.
Ifroze,fingerspoisedtoslipintomyheat.
“Mylady,areyouinthere?”
Nadia,mymaid,wasontheothersideofthedoor.She’dbeenmynursemaidfromthetimeIwasborn,andwe’dformedaclosebond.ShewastheonlymaidorservantinthecastleIspenttimewithoutsideherusualduties.Itwasarelationshipthecourtfoundstrangeandonlythebravewouldcommenton,butIdidn’tcare.NadiawasthemotherI’dneverhad,andIlovedher.
Exceptrightnow.Rightnow,Iwantedhertogoaway.Iwasn’treadytogiveupthechaseforrelease,soIslippedafingerintomyfleshandreleasedaslowbreath.
“Mylady,Iknowyouareinthere.”
IfIignoreher,maybeshewillgoaway,Ithought.
Iwassowet,Icouldbarelyfeelanything.Ineededmoregirth,neededtofeelfullandstretched.Iaddedanotherfinger,myheadpressedhardintothedoorbehindme,mypalmslidingupmybodytomybreast,squeezing,kneading,teasingthroughtheruinsofmydress.Allthewhile,Ithoughtofthatmonsterinthewoods.Theonewholookedlikeaman,hadheldmyheadinhislargehands,strokedmylipswithhislithefingers,pressedhishardbodyagainstmine.Ifhehadkissedme,Iwouldhavesuccumbed.Iwouldhavelethimfuckme,anditprobablywouldhavemeantmydeath,butatleastIwouldhaveknownpassiononmywaytotheSpirit.
“Mylady?”
Bythefuckinggoddess.
Igaveafrustratedgrowlandwithdrew,droppingmyskirts.Iwhirledonmyheelsandthrewopenthedoor.
“What,Nadia?”Isnapped.IfNadiainsistedoninterrupting,thenshewouldhavetodealwithmymood,exceptsheknewmeanddidn’tevenflinch.Shestoodoppositemelookingverymuchunimpressed.Herlong,darkhairwasbraidedandthreadedthroughwithsilver,thosepieceswhisperingaroundherthinface,creatingafrizzyhalo.Herdarkenedskinwassmooththough,andheronlywrinklesweretheonesaroundhereyes,whichremaineddarkandlively.
“Ihavecometohelpyoupreparefortonight.”
Iblinkedather,confused.“Tonight?”
“FortheBloodKing’sarrival.”
Irolledmyeyesandbackedawayfromthedoor,twistingsomyskirttwirledaroundme.Themovementhelpfullycooledmylegsandreleasedthetensioninthebottomofmystomach.
“IdonotcarehowIlookfortheBloodKing.”
“I’drathernotdollyouupeither,butyouareaprincessand,assuch,shouldlooklikeonewhenyoustandatyourfather’sside.”Nadiafollowedmeintomyroomandclosedthedoorbehindher.
Myroomwassmallandthebedtookupafairamountofspace,allowingforlittleelsesaveforatrunkfullofkeepsakesandawardrobe.Icouldhavehadalargesuite,butI’dchosenthisonebecauseoftheview—thewindowbelowlookeddownuponmymother’sgarden.
“Whatwereyoudoinginhereanyway?Ittookyoualongtimetoanswerthedoor,”Nadiasaidasshestokedthefireinthehearth.
EvenifIhadnoticedthechill,Iwouldnothavestirredtheembers.Iwasafraidoffire,evencontained.Ididnotlikethesounds,thecracklesorpops.Ididnotlikethesmellofsmokeoreventheheat,butittrulywastoocoldtogowithout,soIletNadiakeepitgoingandalwaysmadeawidearcarounditwhenIpassed.
“Sleeping,”Isaid,fallingontomybed,staringupatthebluevelvetcanopy.
Iwasstillinsanelyuncomfortable,butitwasprobablybestNadiahadinterruptedme.Otherwise,Iwouldhavecontinuedtomasturbatetothemonsterinthewoods—histouchandsmellandfeel—andwouldhavehatedmyselfevenmorethanIalreadydidforit.
Isighed.
Youareavictim,Itoldmyself,thoughIhatedadmittingit.We’dbeentaughtfromayoungagethatvampiresweresexualcreatures,andtheyoftencastspellsthatfilledeventhemostpiouswithlust.
Itreallydidn’thelpthatIwasn’tpious.
“Youwerenot,”Nadiasaid,straighteningfromherplacebeforethefire.Shepointedthepokeratme.“Ijustwatchedyourunupsixflightsofstairs.”
“Iwasinahurrytosleep.”
Shearchedabrowanddroppedthepokertoherside.“AndescapeCommanderKillian,Ihear.”
Irolledmyeyes.“CommanderKillianisneedy.Iamnot.”
“Hewouldmakeafinehusband,”Nadiacountered,andIrecoiledathowfancifulshesounded.
Isatupandgapedather.“DidyounothearwhatIjustsaid?”
Nadiawasforty-oneandunmarried—whichwasperfectlyfine,excepttoher.Shewantedtobemarried,andherthoughtsonthesubjectwereverymuchthatofthemajorityofCordovians,meaningthatanyoneovertheageofeighteenandunmarriedwasconsideredanoldmaid,andtherushtomarrystemmedfromthefactthatmorepeopleweredyingyoung.
Iwastwenty-sixandperfectlycontenttoremainunwed,andIwasveryvocalaboutthat—amongotherthings—whichtheroyalfamiliesandtheirpeersfounddisturbing.ItoftenledtounsolicitedcommentsabouthowIneededtobetamed.Althoughthelastmantomakethatcommentfoundhimselffacingthepointofmydagger.
Needlesstosay,Ihadareputation.ButIwouldnotacceptamanwhothoughthecouldcontrolme.Mywishtoremainunmarriedalsocoincidedwithmyfeelingsaboutlove.LovewasariskIwasonlywillingtotakeformyfather,Nadia,andmypeople.
Morelovemeanttherewasmoretolose.
“Iheardwhatyousaid.Butwhatiswrongwithneedy?Hewouldbedevotedtoyou.”
“Hewouldbecontrolling.”
AndI’dhavetosleepwithhim…regularly.Icringed,imaginingalifeofpassionlesssexandcouldn’tdoit.No,CommanderKillianwasnotthemanforme.
“Youshouldnotbesopicky,Isolde.Youknowthemalepopulationisdwindlingunderthevampires.Soonyou’llhaveevenfewermentochoosefrom.”
“WhosaysIhavetochoose?”
FatherhadnottoldmeIhadtomarry.Therewerenopoliticalalliancestocreate,becausethehouseswereunitedintheirdeterminationtodefeattheBloodKingandhadbeensincetheriseofthevampires…untilrecently.Untilmyfatherdecidedtosubmittohim.Now,we’dbeenostracized.IfIhadn’tmadeasuitablebridebefore,Icertainlywouldn’tnow,thoughIhadafeelingmorekingdomswouldsoonjoinmyfatherinhisdecisiontochoosethelivesoftheirpeopleoverthealternative.
“Everyrespectableladymarries,Isolde.”
“Nadia,webothknowIamnotrespectable.”
“Youcouldpretend,”sheshotback.“Youareaprincess,blessedbythegoddess,andyetyoumakeamockeryofeverythingshehasgivenyou.”
MyfacegrewflushedwithangeratNadia’swords,andIrosetomyfeet.Ifshehadbeenanyoneelseinmyservice,Iwouldhavedismissedher.ButIknewNadia.ShewasdevoutlyreligiousanddedicatedtoAsha—shehadherownreasonsforherbeliefs,justasIhadmine.Ialsoknewshemeantwelldespiteherself,butthatdidnotmeanIsharedherviews.EvenifCordovahadnotbeencursedwithmonsters,IcouldnevershowloyaltytothetwogoddesseswhohadtakenmymotherbeforeIevenhadthechancetoknowher.
IwassurprisedathowcalmIsoundedwhenIspoke.
“ThedayAsharidstheworldofthevampiresisthedayIhonorherblessings,Nadia.Untilthen,IcanonlybewhoIam.”
Shesighed,notindisappointmentbutinacceptance—herjobwasdoomedfromthebeginning.Shewassupposedtoraisemetobeprimandproper,aladywhowouldeventuallybecomequeenofLara.Whatshe’dgotteninsteadwasme.Iwasn’tsurewhatIwasyet.Untamed,wild,spirited—theywereallwordsthathadbeenusedtodescribeme.WhateverIwas,itdidnotfitamold.ButIdidnotthinkthatmademeabadprincessorthatitwouldmakemeabadqueen.Whatitmademewassomeonewhowaswillingtorulewithoutaking,andthatwassomethingIwasn’tsurethisworldwaspreparedfor.
“Well,”saidNadia.“Ifyoumustbewhoyouare,theleastwecandoishaveyoulooklikeaprincess.Whatdidyoudotoyourdress?”
Iletmyeyesdroptomychest.Inmyfrustration,I’dforgottenithadbeenruined.
“Oh.Iencounteredastrzygaonmyreturnfromtheborder.”
Isawnoneedtolieaboutthat.We’dallbeentaughttofight,havingbeenbornintheDarkEra.Itwasaskillasnecessaryaslearningtowalk.
“IfyouhadstayedwithCommanderKillian,youwouldnothavehadtofight.”
“Ilikefighting,”Iargued.
Nadia’seyesnarrowedonmyruinedbodice,andIknewshewasconnectingthedots—shredded,bloodieddressbutnovisiblewounds.
“Besides,itbarelybrushedme,”Isaidquickly.“Thebloodishis.Youknowwhathappenswhenyouhitavein.”
Nadiashookherheadandpointedtowardmywashroom.“Bath.Now.”
Iobeyedquickly,happytoscrubawaythisday.MaybeIwouldgetluckyandthewaterwouldquenchthefireraginginsidebeforeitturnedmybonestodust.Three
Anhourlater,Iwasreadytopresenttomyfather.IletNadiachoosemydress,ararity,andIthinkinherexcitement,sheforgottheoccasion,becauseshechosemyfavoritegown—aceruleansilkwithpearlembellishmentsthatignitedlikefireagainstmybrownskin.Thenecklinewassquareandlow,andmybreastspillowedattheverytop.
Nadiaclickedhertongue,asignofherdisapproval.
“Toomuchbread,”shesaidassheattempted—andfailed—toforcemynecklinehigher.
“Ifyouthinktodeterme,youwon’t.”
Nadiacommentedonmyweightbecauseitwasanotherpartofmethatdidnotfitthemold.Mybreastswerebig,myhipswide.Oneofmythighswasprobablythesizeofherwaist.Ididn’treallycarethough.Iwasfit,andIcouldfight.ThatwasmorethanIcouldsayforher,anursemaidwhohadfailedtoturnmeintoadocileprincess.
Nadiadrewmyhairovermyshoulders,arrangingmythick,darkwavestohidetheswellofmybreasts.Whenshewasfinished,Ipromptlyslippeditback.
“CanIresign?”sheaskedassheretrievedapearltiarafromthewoodenchestattheendofmybed.Ididnotownmanyheadpieces,becausewhatIhadhadbelongedtomymother,andmanycamefromhernativehomeontheAtollofNalani.Herpeoplewereislanders.Theyweremariners,weavers,andhorticulturalists,hencemymother’sloveforgardening.
Ilaughed.“Anddowhatwithyourtime?Stitchcushions?”
“Read,youinsolentchild,”Nadiasnapped,butherresponsewasplayfulandnotatallfilledwiththetensionofourearlierexchange.
“Iamfarfromachild,Nadia.”
“Youareachilduntilyoumarry,”shesaid.
Irolledmyeyesandsmoothedmydress,studyingmyselfinthemirror.Allmylife,I’dbeentoldthatIlookedlikemymother.AsmuchasIlongedtohearthat,thecomplimentalsoleftmefeelinglikesomeonehadgougedoutmyheart.ItwasareminderofherlongabsencefrommylifeandthesacrificeshehadmadesothatIcouldlive.
“WhymustIattendmyfatherwhileheentertainsourenemywithtalkofsurrender?”
IspokemoretomyselfthanNadia,thoughsheofferedheropinionnevertheless.
“Ifyouaretorulethiskingdom—husbandornot—itwillbeundervampirerulefromthisdayforward.Youmustlearnwhoyouaredealingwith,andtonightisyourfirstlesson.”
Couldthatreallybetrue?Fromthisdayforward,LarawouldanswertotheBloodKing,acreaturewhohadslaughteredthousandsofmykindalready.Itdidnotseemreal.
“Justbeglad,Issi,thattheBloodKinghasnotaskedforawife.”
“Areyouvolunteering,Nadia?”
Sheglaredatme.“NotevenIwanttobemarriedthatbad.”
Asmuchaswejoked,dreadhadbeengatheringinmyheartallday.Today,theworldwouldchange,andnoneofusknewifitwasthebetteroftwooptions.Still,IhadtohopemyfatherwasrightinhisdecisiontoberuledbyKingAdrian.IhadtohopethatAdrian,despitebeingmonstrous,stillpossessedsomekindofhumanity.
Nadiafollowedmefrommyroom,downthenarrowcorridorsofmywing.Thewallsofthecastlewereallintricatemasonwork,thebricklaidinsuchawaythatevenwithoutdecor,theywereaestheticallypleasing.Despitethebeautyandthecraftsmanship,thechillseepedthrough,sendingshiversdownmyspine.Evenworse,mynippleshardened,remindingmeofmyinsatiabledesireformyenemy.
Atthebottomofthestairs,Nadiapaused.
“DonottrembleunderthegazeoftheBloodKing.Surrendertoday,livetoconquertomorrow.”
Nadia’swordsweremyhopethatwewouldfindaweaponthatcoulddefeatourenemy.Shedeparted,leavingmetoentertheantechamberwheremyfatherandIwouldwaitforthearrivaloftheBloodKing,atwhichpointwewouldmoveintothegreathall.MystomachknottedasIapproachedthedoor,butIpausedbeforeknocking,hearingCommanderKillian’svoicerisingfromwithin.
“Thisisatrap,”Killiansaid.
“IfthekingofRevekkadecidestoslaughterusratherthannegotiate,thenitwillsaymoreabouthiscountenancethanours,”myfatherreplied,hisvoicewarmandresonant.Itmademychestfeelcalm.Ilovedmyfatherdearly—hewasallIhadfromthemomentIwasborn.Ihadneverseenhimmakeanimpulsivedecision,soIknewthathe’dthoughtthrougheveryaspectofthissurrender.Mostimportantly,he’dthoughtmostaboutwhatwouldprotectourpeople.
“Thinkofyourdaughter—”Killiantried.
“Knowyourplace,Commander!”
Myfather’svoicesentachillthroughmethatstraightenedmyback,butIwasgladforhisanger.Iwasangrytoo.Theaudacityofthecommandertoassumemyfatherhadn’tthoughtaboutme.Butthis—itwasbiggerthanme.Biggerthanacommanderwhoseegosufferedatthethoughtofbeingsubmissivetoagreaterpower.
“ItisbecauseofIsoldethatIhaveagreedtothistruce.Idonotwishforhertoliveinafuturerifewithviolence.”
“Andyetshewillfaceafuturefarmoreuncertain.”
Itookthatasmycuetoenter.ItwaseitherthatorseeCommanderKillianpinnedtothewallbymyfather’ssword,andasmuchasheannoyedme,spillingbloodwhenvampireswereonourdoorstepdidnotseemlikethebestidea.
Myfather’sexpressionsmoothedintoamaskofcalmwhenhesawme,asadsmilecurlinghisthinninglips.Hestoodnearthefire,aheavyfur-linedcloakmakinghisslightframelooklarger.Myfatherhadneverbeenaparticularlyimposingman,buthehadapresence,anexpressionthatcommandedattentionandavoicethatcommunicateddominance.Hishairwasdarkbutturninggray.Mostofitwasconcentratedinhisbeard,whichcametoapointathischin.
“Isolde,”myfathersaid.“Mygem.”
“Father,”Igreeted,approachinghim,takinghisoutstretchedhand.Hepressedakisstomycheek.
“Youlookbeautiful,asalways.”
“Thankyou,Father.”Ismiled,despitewhatwewerewalkinginto.Itookcomfortinthefactthatthissurrenderstillmeantwewouldbetogether.Intheend,thatwasallthatmattered.
“CommanderKillianwasjusttellingmeyouwenttothebordertodayandleftwithouthim.”
IfKillianwasgoingtobetrayme,theleasthecoulddowastellthewholetruth,whichincludedhowI’dgottenawayfromhim.
Howisyourgutfeeling?Iwantedtoaskbutkeptsilent.Ididn’twantthislecturetogetanylonger.
“CommanderKilliancaughtup,”Isaid,glaringathim.
“Issi,”myfathersaid,anoteofwarninginhisvoice.“Youknowthedangerthatliesuponourdoorstep.”
“IfailtoseewhatCommanderKilliancoulddoifweweresetuponbyavampire.Ittakesanarmytodefeatone.”
Myfathersighed.HeknewIhadapoint.
“Thereareothermonsters,Princess,”Killianargued,hisvoicetight.
Ishiftedmygazeandmethisstare,whichdippedtomybreasts.Iwantedtorollmyeyesbutrefrained.
“MonstersIwastaughttokill.Again,IfailtoseewhyIneedyourescort.”
“BecauseIhaveorderedit.”Myfather’svoicewaslikeawhip,cuttingthroughtheairanddrawingmyattention.“Itisnotupfordiscussion,Isolde.Clear?”
“Crystal,”Irepliedtightly,myskinflushedwithfrustration.
Myfathersighedagain,butitsoundedmorelikerelief.HewasprobablygladIhadn’targued.Itwasonlyforhisbenefit.Iknewhowtaxingthissurrenderhadbeenforhim.IknewhisconcernformestemmedfromtheinvasionoftheBloodKing.Iwasn’tgoingtoaddtothat.Iwould,ontheotherhand,ensurethatKillianheard—andfelt—myrage.
Therewasaknockatthedoor,andMiron,theherald,entered.Hisuniformwasadark-bluetabardwithgoldfringe.Usually,itcomplementedhisburnishedskin,buttoday,helookedsallow,andashespoke,IthoughtIknewwhy—he’djustseentheBloodKingintheflesh.
Hebowed.
“YourMajesty.”Hisvoicetrembled,andheclearedhisthroat.“TheBloodKinghasarrived.”
Astrangetensionfilledthesmallroom.Somehow,thisfeltdifferent.TheBloodKingwasn’tjustbeyondourborders;hewaswithinthem.Hewouldruleusfromthisdayforward.
Myfatherlookedlongatmeandthenturned,graspinghiscloakashewentsoitwhirledaroundwithhim.CommanderKillianheldouthisarm.I’dhaverathershovedaknifethroughit,butIaccepteditinstead.
“Whyareyouwearingthat?”heasked,dippinghisheadsothathisbreathcoatedmycheekashespoke.
Ishouldhavegonewiththeknife,Ithought.
IdidnotlookathimasIreplied.“Itisnotyourplacetocommentonmywardrobe,Commander.”
Hishandtightenedonmine.
“Youareshowingtoomuchskin.Areyoutryingtotemptthevampireking?”
“Knowyourplace,”Isaid,myvoicejustasicyasmyfather’s.
“ThatisnothowImeant—Ionlymeantoprotectyou.”
“Fromwhat?Hungrygazes?”Iasked.WehadjustcomethroughthedoorsoftheantechamberandintothegreathallwhenIturnedtohim,challenging.“Yoursisjustasthreatening,Commander.”
Icrossedtheprecipiceuponwhichmyfather’sthronesatandmovedtohisleft,mygazesweepingthegreathall.Itwasagrandroom,richlydecoratedwithgildedmirrorsandelaboratecandelabras.Acanopyofbluesilkcurtainedus,andthroughouttheroom,goldlarks—ourhouseemblem—adornedbannersofthesamebluethathungfromtheceiling.
Theroomwassilentandstill,thoughitwascrowdedwithpeople—guardsandlordsandladieswhohadcomefromtheirestatestowatchthesurrender.Myfatherhadspentweeksinthisveryroom,hearingtheirconcerns,mediatingtheirargumentsforandagainstsurrender.Bytheendofit,Ibegantoloathemanyofthemwhosefearsamountedtolosingtheirlands,wealth,andstatusundertheBloodKing,asifthatmatteredwhenthedecisionwasn’tbetweenlosingstatusandretainingit.Itwasbetweenlifeanddeath.
“HismajestyKingHenrideLarawelcomesKingAdrianAleksandrVasilievofRevekka.”
Thistime,Miron’svoicewassteadyandstrong.Holdingmybreath,Ifixedmyeyesonthedoorsattheotherendofthehallway.Thecrowd,whohadstoodoneithersideofacarpetedrunner,drewfartherbackastheguardspulledthemopentorevealtheBloodKing.
Iswallowedagaspasaheadyflushunraveledwithinmybody,andIwantedtocrawloutofmyskinasmyeyesconnectedwithafamiliar,gorgeousface.Thevampirewhohadfoundmeintheclearing,theonewhohadlickedbloodfrommyskinandsentmeintoaspiralofdesire,wasAdrian,theBloodKing.
Hehadchangedsinceourencounter,wearingbloodredinsteadofblack.Goldringsgleameduponhismiddlefingerandpinkie,anduponhisheadsataspikedblackcrown.Hisstatuswasevidentinthewayhecarriedhimself—regalandconfident—andyethewalkedlikeapredator,hisblackbootsclickingashetooklethalstepafterlethalsteptowardmyfather.
Ishouldhaveknownitwashim,Ithought,staringathimnow,butithadnotoccurredtometoexpectthekingofvampirestohavegoneinsearchofastrzyga.Weretheynotmonstersbornoftheirkind?
Asheapproached,hisgazeslidfrommyfathertoKillianandthentome.Oureyesmet,andIletoutaslow,quiveringbreathasheassessedthelengthofmybody.Somethingabouthimopenedachasminmystomach,andIwasagainoverwhelmedbythesamekeenhungerasbefore.Iwantedtobedevouredbythiscreature.
Mylegsbegantoshake,andIshiftedmygazetomyfatherashespoke.
“KingAdrian.ItisagrimwelcomeIextendtoyou,”hesaid,hisvoiceresonatingwithinthegreathall.
“Awelcomeallthesame,”Adriansaid.Hisvoicedrewandheldmyattention,andIwatchedhislipsashespoke,notwiththevoiceofamonsterbutthevoiceofalover.“Iaccept.”
“Youandyourarmyhavequitethereputation,”myfathersaid.
“Areputationthathasyoucontemplatingsurrenderbeforebloodshed,”Adriansaidandinclinedhisheadslightly.“Smart.”
“Somehavecalledmeacoward,”Fathersaid.“Forconsideringyourproposal.”
Thetensioninthegreathallgrew.
“Doyoucarewhatothersthink,KingHenri?”
“Icareaboutmypeople,”hesaid.“Iwantthemsafe.Isthatyouroffer,KingAdrian?Thatyouwillkeepmypeoplesafe?”
Thevampirestaredatmyfatherforalongmoment,studyinghimwithadifferentintensity,asifheweretryingtodecideifhewasbeingtruthful.
“Howmuchfreedomdoyouwishforyourpeopletohave?”
Myfatherdidnotanswerimmediately.Finally,Ishiftedmygazeandsawhimleanforward.
“Arewebargaining,KingAdrian?”
Thevampireofferedasmallshrug.“Ihaveanoffer.”
Fatherwaited,andwhenAdriandidnotcontinue,heprompted,“Whatisthisoffer?”
“Iwantyourdaughter.Towed,ofcourse,”headded,asifitwereanafterthought.
“No,”CommanderKilliansaidinstantly.
AdrianglaredandsodidI,eventhoughIwasstilltryingtoprocesstheenemyking’swords.Hadhejustaskedformyhandinmarriage?Mylegsbegantoshakeforaverydifferentreasonnow,andforamoment,Ifearedmykneeswouldbuckle.Instead,Icurledmyfingersintomypalm,lettingmynailspiercetheskin.Iwouldnotshowweaknessbeforethiscreature,thoughI’dalreadymanagedtodothatintheclearing.
“Youwishtowedmy—no,”myfathersaiddefinitively.
Ididnotwanttobemarried,leastofalltothisman.
Adrianstaredathim.“Youwouldchoosewarsoquickly?Ithoughtyoucaredforyourpeople.”
“Hedoescare,”Isaidandtookastepforward,angeredbyhisaccusation.
“Issi.”Myfathermadetoreachforme,butitwasCommanderKillianwhointervenedandsteppedbetweenmeandtheBloodKing.
“KingAdrianhasaskedformyhand,”Isaid.“AmInotallowedtospeak?”
“Thesearemattersforkings,”CommanderKilliansaid.Hisvoicewaslowandgratedagainstmyear.
Iwantedtopushhimaway,butIreinedmyselfin,offeringacommandinstead.“Backtoyourpost,Commander.”
Hewasreluctanttoobey,andifwehadbeenalone,hewouldn’thave.Still,hefellbackandreturnedtomyfather’sside.WhenmygazeturnedbacktoAdrian,helookedamused.
“Ifyouwantedawife,whydidyouwaituntilnowtoaskformyhand?”
“IdidnotknowIwantedoneuntiltoday,”hereplied.
Myfrustrationspiked.Hadhedecidedwhenwe’dmetearlierinthewood?HadIhadthesameeffectonhimashedidonme?
“Attractionhardlymakesamarriage,KingAdrian,”Isaid.
“Itmakesabearableone,”hesaid.“Wouldn’tyousay,Princess?”
Soyouwanttofuckme,Ithought,narrowingmyeyes.Wedidnotevenneedvowsforthat,butsomehow,offeringmyselftotheBloodKingwithoutamarriagecontractfeltworsethanlosingmyfreedom.
“Unlessitismarriagetoamonster,”Isaid.“Thenitismerelycaptivity.”
Therewereafewmurmursfromthecrowd,quicklysilencedbyAdrian’sreply.“Ifyouwillnotagree,thenwewillhavewar,”hesaidsimply.
“AbattleIwillgladlyfight!”myfathershouted,gettingtohisfeet,andafewmembersofthecrowdcheeredalongwithhisdeclaration.Hiswordswerevisceral,andIknewhemeantthem,evenifIalsoknewhewoulddie,anditwasthatrealityIcouldnotface.
HowhadIsuddenlybecometheprizetobewoninbattle?
“Father—”Istartedtospeakbutwassilenced.
“Isolde,leave.Immediately.”
Thearmsoftheguardsattheexitsrattledastheyhoistedtheirweapons,andthelordsandladieswhohadcrowdedintothehallbegantoscreamandmurmur,pressingintothewalls.
Thiscouldnothappen.Itwouldmeanslaughter.CommanderKillianhadcomearoundmyfather’sthrone,hishandtakingmyarmbeforeIjerkedaway.
Whywashealwaystouchingme?
“Iwillnotbedismissed!”Isaid.
“Princess—”
“Yourprincesswishestospeak,”Adriansaid.“Lether.”
Thelasttwowordswerespokenwithwarning.Myheartwasstillracing,adrenalinesurgingthroughmyblood.Ilookedtomyfather,whosewateryblue-greeneyesweredesperate.
Don’t,hebegged.
Ihaveto,Imouthed.Asmuchashedidnotwanttoloseme,Icouldnotlosehim.Icouldnotloseourpeople.I’dwantedtobetheirqueentoprotectthem,andIstillwould,butnotinthewayIexpected.
IturnedtoAdrian,takingasteptowardhim.Icouldfeeleveryoneintheroomstiffening,tighteningtheirholdsontheirweapons.Thetensionwasalreadyabattle,andthephantomsmellofbloodpermeatedtheairalthoughnonehadbeenshedyet.
Still,IheldtheBloodKing’sgaze,focusedonhimsocompletely,itwasasifheweretheonlypersonintheroom.ThelongerIlooked,theeasieritwas.Ithelpedthathewasbeautiful,butIalsobecameinterestedinthingsIshouldn’t,likethebowofhislipsandthefaintscaroverhischeekIhadnotnoticedearlier.
Irefusedtotakeabreathbeforespeaking,fearingitwouldsoundmorelikeashudder.“KingAdrian,ifyoumaintainyouwillprotectmycountry,mypeople,myfather,thenIwillagreetomarryyou.”
Adrian’slipscurled,butitwasasmilethatdidnotlastlongwhenCommanderKillianprotested.“Myprincess,youcan’tmarrythismonster!Iwon’tletyou!”
Adrianscowled.“Youwon’tlether?”
“Quiet,creature.Youareacurseuponourlands!”
Thecommanderdrewhissword,andtheguardsfollowed.
Iturned,facingKillian,blockingAdrian.Itwasnotasmartdecision.IdidnotknowAdrian,hewastheenemy,andIwasgivinghimmyback,butIcouldnotletthingsprogress.
“Loweryoursword,”Iseethed.Heglaredatme,hisfingerstighteningaroundthehilt.“Now!”
Mycommandechoedinthehall.
“Iwillnotseethislandcoveredinthebloodofmypeople.IagreedtoKingAdrian’sterms.”
“Youforget,Princess.Itisyourfatherwhoruleshereandrulesyourfate.”
IglaredatKillianbeforeshiftingtolookatmyfather,gazesoftening.“Iloveyou,Father.Iwouldneverwillinglyleaveyou,butyouknowthisistherightdecision.YouknowbecauseyoumadeitbeforeRevekkawasonourdoorstep.”
Iknewwhathewasthinking—thatwasbeforehewantedyou
“Iamoneperson,”Isaid.“Iamnotworthaslaughteredkingdom.”
“Youarewortheverystarinthesky,Issi,”myfathersaid,andforamoment,myheartsank.Wouldhisdeclarationofwarfollow?Butinstead,hisgazeliftedtoAdrian.“Mydaughterhasahabitofensuringeveryoneelse’ssafetybeforeherown.Itrustamongthoseyouprotect,shewillbeone.”
IturnedtofacetheBloodKing.Iwantedtolookuponhimasheansweredmyfather.Forthefirsttimesincehearrived,hebowed,placingahandoverhisheartasheanswered,“Ivowituponmylife.”
Hiswordssurprisedme,andIhadtoadmit,Ididn’tbelievehim.Inarrowedmyeyes.Whatwashismotive?Whyme?
“Father,IwouldliketospeakwithKingAdrianalone.”
“Absolutelynot.”
“Doyoudoubtmyvow?”Adriansaid.
“Youareanenemy,youhaveslaughteredthousandsofourpeople,andyouhavejustaskedformydaughter’shandinmarriage.Youwillforgivemywishtoprotectherforaslongaspossible.”
“Father,”Isaidquietly.“IwillultimatelybealonewithKingAdrianmanytimesinthecomingweeks.Whatisafewminuteshereinthewallsofourhome?”
Hewatchedme,frowning,andthenglaredatAdrian.
“Iwillgiveyoufiveminutes.Nomore.”
IlookedatAdrianandthenturned,leadingthewayintotheanteroom.Iclenchedmyteethandfists,feelingsoviolent,Ishook.ItdidnothelpthatwhenIfacedhim,helookedcompletelycalm.
Ofcoursehewascalm.Hewouldendthisdaywithanewkingdomandawife.
Wife.
Mystomachsankattheword.
“Isthissomekindofjoke?”Idemanded.
“Whichpart?”heasked,asifhecouldnotguess.
“Thepartwhereyouaskedformyhandinmarriage,”Ispat.
“Thatpart,”hesaid,hisvoicedeep,hiswordsdeliberate,“isveryserious.”
“Whatneedhaveyouforawife?”Iasked.“Youcannotsirechildren.”
Vampireswerenottechnicallylivingcreaturesandcouldnotreproduce;theycreatedmoreoftheirkindbyturningexistinghumansintomonsters.
Adriannarrowedhiseyes,andIwonderedifIhadstruckachord.Still,kingsmarriedformanyreasons:ifnotheirs,thenalliances,andoccasionallylove.Adriancouldnothavechildren,hedidnotneedalliances,andlovewasaridiculousnotionforsomeonelikehim.
“Doyouwishtobeabreedingmare?”hechallenged.
Iscowled.Whatdiditmatter?Ididnotwanttobeawife,buthereIwas,suddenlyengaged.“Willyoutakeawifeforeveryhouseyouconquer?”Icountered.Perhapshewishedforaharemorbodieshecoulddrain.
Adrianseemedamused,hisbrowslifted,hislipspursed.“Ithinkyouwillbechallengingenough.WhywouldIwishformore?”
“Idon’tunderstand.”
“Whatistheretounderstand?”
“Whyme?”
Hestaredatme,andIgottheimpressionhedidnotknowhowtoanswermyquestion.
“YouassumeIwantawife,”hesaid.“ButIcameforaqueen.”
Itwasmyturntostare.
“Soourmarriagewillbeoneofpageantry?”
“Oh,Ithinkwearebothtoopassionateforthat.”
Hiswordshadanunnervingeffectonme,andIcouldnotfigureoutifitwasbecauseofthewayhesaidthem—hisvoicelowanderotic,thevoiceIimaginedheusedinthedeadofnightashespoketohislovers—orthewordsthemselves.
Istiffened,andyetheatblossomedinmychest.“Youdidnothavetoaskformyhandifallyouwantedwasmybody.Iamsurewecouldhavecometoanagreement.”
Adrian’seyesflickered,andhetookastepforward.Icouldnottelliftheactionwasfromfrustrationorifhe’dtakenmycommentasaninvitation.Eitherway,ittookeverythinginmenottostepback.Hemusthaveseenmyapprehension,becausehepaused.
“Youhavenothingtofearinmyapproach.”
“Ihaveeverythingtofear.ThebloodoftheNineHousesisonyourhands.”
“Notyourhouse,”hesaid,asifthatmadeeverythingbetter.
PerhapsIshouldhavesaiditdifferently.“DoyouintendtocontinueyourwaruponCordova,evenwithmyfather’ssurrender?”
“IdidnotsetouttoconquertheHouseofLaraonly,PrincessIsolde.IsetouttobecomekingofCordova.”Hiseyesdipped.“AndIneedaqueen.”
“Areyoutryingtotemptmewithpower?”
“Eventually,asittemptsall.”
“Isthatwhyyouaredoingthis?Forpower?”
“Itisnotmymainmotivation,”hesaid.“Butaresultofit.”
“Andwhatisyourmainmotivation?”Iasked,myeyesslippingtohislips,whichliftedatmyquestion.
“I’mafraidIcannotbetemptedtorevealallmysecrets,Princess.”
“Really?”Ibreathed.“Notevenalittle?”
Heliftedhishand,andItookastepaway.Hechuckled,asifI’dprovenhispoint.
“No,notwhenyouflinchatmyapproach.”
Iglaredathim.
“Isworeanoathtoyourfather.Iwillnothurtyou.”
“Doyouupholdallyouroaths?”Iasked.
“Ihaveneverswornanoathuntilnow,”heanswered.“AndIwillswearnomoreafterthis.”
Onceagain,heheldouthishand.Myeyesfelltoit—scarred,strong,graceful—andIgavehimmyfingers.
“See?”hewhispered.“Nothingtofear.”
Thoughhespokethewords,Istillheldmybreathasheturnedmyhandovertorevealmypalm.ItwasbloodiedfromearlierwhenI’dclenchedmyfingerstightinanefforttokeepstandingafterhe’daskedtowedme.Nowthebloodhaddriedintothecracksofmyskin.
Heclickedhistongue.
“Youshouldbemorecareful,Princess.”
Thenhebentandhistongueswirledovermypalm.Thatwastwiceinonedaythisvampirehadtastedmybloodand,onceagain,healedmywounds.Thistime,Ilethim,evenasguiltcreptoverme.
Whenhisgazeliftedtomine,therewassomethingdeadlywithinhiseyes—adarknessthatseemedendless.Helickedhislips.
“Yourbloodistrulyahomecoming,”hesaid.
Ipulledmyhandaway,disgustedandsuddenlyafraidhewouldwantmore.
Adrianchuckled,asifheknewmythoughts.“Nottoworry,mysweet.Iwillnotfeedfromyou.Notuntilyouask.”
“Iwillneverask.”
TheBloodKing’slipstwitched,andwhenhespoke,hisvoicewasreverent.“Youwill.Youwillbegforit.”
Icouldnotimaginebeggingforanythingfromthis…creature.Itookadeepbreathandletitoutslowly.Theriseofmychestdrewhisgaze.
“Areyouthreateningme?”
“No.Iamofferingthepromiseofpleasure.”
Ithoughtmythroatwouldcloseup,becauseasmuchasIhatedwhathewas,asmuchasIhatedhim,hespokealanguageIwantedtolearn.
Still,hecouldneverknowthat.
“Believeme,KingAdrian,”Isaidandwasproudofhowsteadymyvoicesounded.“Nothingthatcomesfromyouwilleverbeapleasure.”
Hislipsliftedhigher.“Iacceptyourchallenge,Princess.”
Thedoorsopenedthen,andmyfather’svoicebeckoned.“Isolde.Come.”
Why,whengivenareprieve,didInotmove?Istayed,standingbeforeAdrian,rootedtothespot,feelingasifI’dbeendraggedtotheedgeofacliff,bodyonedge,completelywound.
Iwantedtofall,andIcouldtellbythehungrylookinAdrian’seyeshewasreadytocatchme.
“Runalong,Princess,”hesaid.“I’llseeyousoonenough.”Four
“Yougavehertothatmonster!”CommanderKillian’svoicerose.Hestoodbeforemyfather,whowasslumpedinhischair.Usually,Killian’swordswouldincenseme,andI’dformsomekindofsnidereplythatillustratedhowmuchIdisagreedwithhim,butrightnow,Ihadnowords.Tomorrownight,Iwouldmarryourconqueror.
I’dneverimaginedmyselfmarried,evenwithallNadia’stalkabouthowitwasexpectedofme.Queensdonotrulealone.Queensdonotruleatall,she’dsay.Theyheldnopowerbeyondwhattheycoulddofortheirking.
Iwassupposedtochangethat.I’dfeltasthoughthatwasmypurpose,afeelingsostrong,ithadfilledmywholeheartwithexcitementanddetermination.
Suddenly,thatwasgone,andtheabsenceofitwasagreaterweightthanI’deverimagined.
Now,I’drulejustlikeotherqueens.
Doyouwishtobeabreedingmare?Adrianhadaskedme.Wasittooearlytohopethatperhapshewantedsomethingdifferentfromhisqueentoo?
Ilingerednearthewindow,staringoutovermyhome,mykingdom,theonethatnowbelongedtotheBloodKing.Itwasstilldark,butthemoonwasheavyandfullandcastthelandinsilver.Absently,IwonderedifAdrianwouldthinkitwasasbeautifulasIdid.WouldheappreciatewhatLarahadtooffer,ourcolorfultextiles,sweetwines,andlivelyculture?Orwasitjustanothercountrytomarkoffhislistofconqueredkingdoms?
“Youcannotmeantoletherleavewithhim!”
“CommanderKillian.”Myfather’svoicewaslow,roughened,tired,andIturnedfromthewindowtowatchtheexchange.“Leaveus.”
Killianfrozeforamomentandthenlookedtome,asifIwouldbegmyfatherforhispresence.
“Youweregivenanorder,”Isaidinstead,whichcausedhimtofrown.“Youshouldobey.”
Anothermomentofhesitation,thenhebowedandleft.
Atfirst,neitheroneofusspoke.Theairwastooheavy,theshockofwhatwe’dbothagreedtonotquiteregistering.
“ThisisneverwhatIintendedforyou,”myfathersaidatlast.
Somethingthickgatheredinthebackofmythroat.
“Iknow,”Iwhispered,mymouthquivering.“Iwouldhaveneverleftyourside.”
Myfatherswallowedandwipedathiseyesbeforehestoodandapproached,placinghishanduponmyface,histhumbbrushingmycheekbone.Ihatedthewayhelookedatme,likehewasaloneintheworldwithoutme.
“Youarethehopeofourkingdom,Isolde.”
Thenhedroppedhishand,turned,andlefttheroom,shuttingthedoorquietly,andIfeltlikehehadtakenmywholeheartwithhim.
***
Returningtomyroomwasanightmare.
Ihardlymadeitdownthecorridorwithoutencounteringastrickengaze.Iheldmyheadhigher,refusingtolowermyeyes.Iwasnotashamedofmydecision,andIknewthatmypeopleonlylookedatmethiswaybecausetheywereafraid—formeandtheirfuture.
“PrincessIsolde!”
LadyLarisashimmiedforward;thefoldsofhergownseemedtorestricthermovement.Shehadheryoungersister,Gabriela,intow.Theirfather,LordCristian,oversawoneofthreevineyardsinLara.Hehadbeenthefirsttosweetenthebitterdrink,whichhadheightenedthedemandacrossallCordova.HehadalsoloudlydeclaredhisconcernforthelossofhistitleandlanduponsurrendertoAdrian,whichhadloweredmyopinionofhimconsiderably.ThoughLarisaandGabrielawerewellmeaningandsweet.
“Ijustheardthenews.Howareyou?”
“Iamfine,LadyLarisa,”Isaid.“Thankyouforyourconcern.”
Imeantthatgenuinely.ShehadbeenthefirsttoaskifIwasallright.
“Icannotimaginehowshockedyoumustbe,”shecontinued.“Ialwaysthoughtyouwouldruleasourqueen.”
“BecomingqueenofRevekkadoesnotmeanIwillnotalsoonedayruleLara,”Isaid.
“Soyouwillsupportyournewhusband,then,inhisconquestofCordova?”
IwhirledtofindLordCristianhovering.Hewasatallmanwithdarkfeatures,andhestareddownatme,hishandsbehindhisback.Ihatedthewayhelookedatme.ItwasclearhethoughtIwasnothingmorethanachild,evenatmytwenty-sixyearsofage.
“Certainlynot,LordCristian,”Ireplied,tryingtokeepmyfrustrationatbay.“ThoughIamstillheirofLara.”
“Ofcourse,”hesaidandcametostandbesidehisdaughters.“Weareallwatchingwithbatedbreath,Princess,toseeyournextmove.”
“Excuseme?”
“YouwillbeclosetotheBloodKing,”hesaid.“Closerthananyoneeverhasbeen.”
Hedidnotneedtobeexplicitformetounderstandhisimplication—theywerewaitingformetokillAdrian.Tospeaksuchwords,however,wouldbeconsideredtreasontotheBloodKing.Thoughthatdidnotmattertomesomuchasthisman’sperceivedpoweroverme.
“Theonlythingyoushouldbewatching,LordCristian,isyourcrop,”Isaid.
Themanstiffened.Ifhewantedtoplayagameofsubtlety,Icouldtoo,especiallygivenhisconcernforhimselfandnotthoseoverwhomheruled.
“Haveagoodnight,mylord,”Isaid,andthenmygazeshiftedtohisdaughters.“LadyLarisa,LadyGabriela.”
BythetimeImadeittomyroom,myadrenalinehadcrashed,andIwasleftfeelingexhausted.AsIopenedmydoor,IfoundNadiawaiting.Shelookedupatmefromherspotbeforethefireplace,shouldershunched,handsgraspingherapron.Ididnotneedtoaskifshehadheardthenews;Icouldtellbyherexpressionsheknew.Hereyeswerewide,glassy,andshewaspale.
“Nadia.”Hernamefellfrommymouth,quietanddistant.Ihadnotexpectedhertobewaitingforme.I’dreallyhopedtobealone,especiallybecauseshelookedatme—inthesamewayeveryonewaslookingatme—asifIwerealreadyaghost.
“Oh,Issi,”shesaidassheadvanced.Herarmsencircledme,handsdiggingintomyback.“IcannotbelievewhatIhavejustheard.Tellmethatvilekingdidnotaskforyourhand.”
“Hedid,”Isaid,andshepushedmetoarm’slengthtostudymyface.Ilookedbackatherbutdidnotreallyseeher.Icouldn’tfocus.
“Youdidnothavetosayyes.Yourfatherwouldhavegladlyfoughtforyou.”
Myfatherrarelymaderashdecisions,butsomethingelsehadovertakenhimwhenAdrianhadaskedforme.Ihadneverseenthatkindoffireinhiseyes,butIcouldrelate,becauseitwashowmyinsidesfelt—akindofangryfear,adesperationtoholdontothepersonyoulovemost.
“ButIdidsayyes,”Isaid.
Nadiaknewthat,andmyfatherdidtoo.
Itookabreathandreleasedher,crossingtheroomtomybed.Islippedoutofmyshoes.ItwasmywayoftellingherIwasreadyforbed.
“IfonlyyouhadwedCommanderKillian,”shesaidassheloosenedthetiesatmyback.
Icringed.“EvenifIhadknownwhattodaywouldbring,IcouldnotfacemarryingAlecKillian.”
“Itwouldbebetterthanmarriagetoamonster,”Nadiasaidasshefinishedunlacingmygown.Itpuddledtothefloor,andIwasleftwearingonlyacream-coloredshift.
Iturnedtofaceher.
Killianhadallthepotentialofbecomingamonster,thoughIdidnotsaythat,becauseattheendoftheday,thatwasn’twhatIcaredabout.
“WhatwouldbebetterisifIcouldremainalone,”Isaid.Ihadgottentoocomfortable,assumingIdidnothavetofillthetraditionalrolesofaprincess.IhadthoughtIwouldblazemyowntrail,thatIwouldbecomethefirstqueentoserveintheNineHouses,butIwaswrong,andthathurtmemorethananything.“Atleastthismarriagewillsaveakingdom.”
IfIcouldnotblazethetrailalone,thenperhapsIcouldsaveourkingdom.Myspiritsrosealittleatthatthought.
“Icannotimaginewhatthatcreaturecouldpossiblywantwithawife.”
“YouassumeIwantawife,”he’dsaid.“ButIcameforaqueen.”
ExceptthatAdrianhadconqueredandruledoverRevekkaformorethanonehundredandfiftyyears—andhe’dbeenalivefarlonger—withoutaqueen.Atonepoint,itseemed,hetoohaddesiredtobealone,sowhathadchanged?
Yourbloodistrulyahomecoming
IshiveredasIrecalledhiswordsandthewayhisfingersfeltastheyclaspedmine.Itmusthavebeennoticeable,becauseNadiareachedforablanket,wrappingitaroundmyshoulders.IhatedhowIreactedwhenhetouchedme—myheadfeltlight,myfacegrewflushed,mywholebodyfeltaliveandyetonedge,unpreparedforthenextsensationhemighturgetothesurface.
Ihateditbecausemybodyactedasifhewerenottheenemy.
Nadiawasright.You’reachild,Iscoldedmyselfandreasoned.Anymancanmakeyoufeelthisway.
“Ishuddertothinkwhathehasplannedforyou.”
Nadiawasstilltalking,butmymindhadgoneintoafullspiral.WhileIwonderedwhathewantedwithme,Ithoughtoftheimmediatefuture.WhatdutiesdidtheBloodKingexpectmetoperform?He’dbeenopenabouthiswishtodrinkmyblood,andhe’dofferedthepromiseofpleasure—didvampiresconsummatemarriagesdifferently?Ifitwasdonebydrinkingbloodratherthansex,couldIabstainforaslongaspossibletopreventatruemarriage?
“Issi?”
MyeyesliftedandconnectedwithNadia’sconcernedstare.
“Yes?”Iasked.
“Areyouokay?”
Ihardlyknew.Ihadbegunthedayhatingvampireswitheveryfiberofmybeingandendedthedayengagedtoone.Ihadbeenthroughawholerangeofemotions—apassionatehighandadevastatinglow.Ifeltexhaustedandyetlustful.Theneedtobefullandstretchedandutterlyshatteredhadneverreallygoneaway.Ithadebbedandflowed.
“CanIbealone,Nadia?”Iasked.
Shehesitated.“Areyousure?”
“Please,Nadia.”
Irarelysaidplease.
“Allright.”
Nadiamovedtowardthedoorandcastmeaforlornglace.“Callifyouneedme.”
Whenshewasgone,Ifellontomybed,sinkingintothevelvetcovers,myeyesfixedontheceiling.
“WhathaveIdone?”Isaidaloudbeforeclosingmyeyes.AsIexhaled,Irelaxed,thendrewmylegsupandapart,thehemofmyshiftgatheringaroundmythighsasItrailedmyfingersalongmyskin.IthoughtabouthowmuchIwouldhavepreferredanother’stouch,becauseIdidnotthinkmyownwouldeasethisache.
PerhapsthatwastheholdofAdrian’smagic.Washetheonlyonewhocouldreleaseme?
Suddenly,Adrianhoveredoverme,hismouthclosetomine,hishair,likethesun,curtainingmyview,curlingsoftlyagainstmyskin.
“Whyareyouhere?”Iasked.
“Because,”hesaid,“youweremadeforme.”
“Youcouldsaythattoanywoman,justasIcouldsaythattoanyman.”
“Butwoulditbetrue?”
“Thereisnotruthwheremagicsurvives.”
“Thereisonlytruthifmagicsurvives,”hesaid,andhebenttowardme,lipstouchingmythroatasmyheadpressedintomypillow,andmyfingersteasedmyachingflesh.“Comeforme,mysweet,sothatImaytasteyou.”
Mybodywasprimedandheated,myentranceslickwithneed,andjustasIwasabouttodipmyfingersintomyswollenflesh,thedoortomybedroomflewopen.Ijerkedintoasittingposition,meetingKillian’sgaze.
“What?”Isnapped,angrythatIhadbeeninterruptedagain,thatIcouldnotuntiethisknotdeepinmystomach.
“AmIinterrupting?”heasked,eyesdarkeningashetookinmypositiononthebed.
“Yes,”Ihissed,angrierbecauseheknewwhatheinterrupted,furiousbecauseofwhathedaredtosaynext.
“Itisn’tanythingIcanhelpwith?”
“IfI’dwantedhelp,Iwouldhavecalledforyou,”IsnappedasIslidoffthebed.Icrossedtheroom,puttingdistancebetweenmyselfandthecommander.“Iwishtobealone.”
Insteadoflistening,heclosedthedoor,andIsighedloudly.
“Whatdidthecreaturesaytoyou?”Killiandemanded.
“Nothingthatmeansmuch,”Isaid.“Icanbarelyrecallhiswords.”
Whichwasalie.Irememberedeveryword.Theystillslidacrossmyskin,muchashistonguehaddonethisevening,promisingpleasure.Ihatedmyselfforwantingwhatheoffered,butIwasstandingoppositeamanwhocouldnevergiveit.HowcouldIpossiblybeblamed?
“Youcan’treallymeantomarryhim,”Killiansaid.
“Whatdoyoumean?”Igazedathim,eventhoughIdidn’twanttolookathim.I’dratherheleft.
“ImeanexactlywhatI’masking.Youaren’treallygoingtogothroughwiththiswedding,areyou?”
“Idon’thaveachoice,Killian.I—”
“Youhaveachoice!”hecutmeoff.“Killhim,Isolde.Driveaknifethroughhisheart,andthenyouandIcanwed.”
IstoodoppositeKillian,stunned.“Iwouldnevermarryyou.”
“YouwouldmarrytheBloodKingwithnoargumentbutnotme?”
“It’snotasifIhaveachoice.Thiswillsavesomanylives,Killian.Whatcanyouoffer?”
Heclenchedhisfistsandliftedthem,asifhewishedtostrikesomething—maybeme—buthedidnotmovefromhisplace.Afteramoment,hespoke.“Beforeyourfatherdecidedonatrucewiththevampires,hepromisedyoutome,”Killiansaid.“IonlyhadtokilltheBloodKing.”
“Promised?”Irepeatedtheword,becausehisadmissionshockedme.Myfatherhadneverspokentomeofmarriage,leastofalltoKillian.
“Thinkaboutit,Isolde.Wouldyounotratherlivealonglifewithmethanonewithhim?”
“Ifitweremychoice,I’dhaveneitherofyou.”
“Youdon’tmeanthat.”
“Imeaneverydamnword.”
IstartedtopassKillian,intentonopeningthedooranddemandingthatheleave,buthegrabbedmyarmandjerkedmetowardhim.Iliftedmyhandandslappedhisface,buthedidn’treleaseme.
“Let.Go,”Isaidbetweenmyteeth.
“YoudonotthinkIcouldkillhim.Icould.Iwouldforyou.”
“AndIamtellingyouno.Donothingforme,Killian.Idon’twantit.”
Ijerkedonmyarm,andheloosenedhisgrip.
“Areyoutellingmeyouwanthim?”heasked,anoteofdisgustinhistone.
“Iwillnotdignifyyourquestionswitharesponse.NotthatyouwouldhearmeifIgaveone.”
Iturnedfromhimandswungthedooropen.
“Leave.Now.”
Killian’sstarewaslethal,buthestillmanagedacourteousbowbeforestormingfromtheroom.Istoodforamoment,rubbingmysorearm.TherewerealotofreasonsI’dneverconsidermarryingthecommander.Asidefromblandsex,hewasquicktoanger,atraitIneverwantedinahusband.Isawittoooftenamongnobility,especiallyamongthekingsoftheNineHouses.
Oncehewasgone,Iwalkedtothewindowandstaredoutintothenight.Itwaswellpastsundown,andeverygatethatledintoHighCityandthecastlegroundswouldbelockedandunderguard,thoughthatmeantnothingforKillian,andIwonderedifhisangerwasacuteenoughtosendhimbeyondthosegatestoattempthisassassinationoftheBloodKing.
IhadnofaiththatKillianwouldsucceedinhisefforttokillAdrian,butIwonderedwhathisbetrayalwouldmeanforourtruce?FortheprotectionAdrianhadofferedmypeople?Iwantedtoensuretheywouldbesafedespiteoneman’sroguechoice.
Ilingeredatthewindowamomentlongerbeforeslippingonmycloak,armingmyself,andleavingmyroom.
ThecoldseepedthroughmyslippersasImademywayoutoftheservants’quartersandintothenight.Ihadn’texactlydecidedhowIwasgoingtomakeitpasttheguardsatthegate,andIwasnoclosertofiguringthatoutwhenIarrived.NicolaeandLascarhadretired;intheirplaceweretwoolderguardswhowerenotaseasilyswayedbymycharm—onenamedAvram,theotherIvan.
“Princess,”Avramsaid.“Youbestgetbacktothecastle.”
Iignoredhim.“HasCommanderKilliancomethroughthesegates?”
“Minutesago,”saidIvan.“Canwepassalongamessage?”
Ihesitatedandtriedtolookcoy,clearingmythroat.“I’drathersurprisehim.”
Thetwoexchangedalook.Avramlookedamused,butIvanfrowned.
“Youcannotblameher,”Avramsaid.“She’sgottomarrytheBloodKingtomorrow.”
Bythefuckinggoddess,Ihatedaskingpermissionfromanyone.PerhapsbecomingAdrian’swifewouldaffordmesomeleveloffreedomagain.
“Atleastletoneofusescortyoutothecommander,”saidIvan.
“Yousaidhewasminutesaheadofme,”Iresponded.“Icancatchup.”
“Therearemonstersinthewoods,Princess,”Avramwarned,asifIdidnotknow.
“I’marmed.”
“Ifyouwantthecommander,youmusthaveanescort,”saidAvram.
“Fine,”Isaid,haughty,andsteppedbetweentheguards.“Comealong,Ivan.”
Ididnotwaittoseeifhebegantofollow,butIhadchosenhimoverAvram,whoIknewwasfarmoreathletic.IvanwouldhaveahardertimecatchingmewhenImadearunfortheborder.
Weenteredthetreeline.Therewerethreepathswherethevegetationhadbeenworndown.EachledtoadifferentstrongholdontheborderofLara.IdidnotusuallysticktopathswhenIenteredthewoods—mostlybecauseIneverwantedtobecaughtbythesoldierswhousedthem.
“Hewentthisway,Princess,”hesaid,pointingstraightahead.
Mystomachdroppedalittlefurther.Itwasthedirectionofthevampire’scamp
Heisn’tthisstupid,Itoldmyself.ThoughIcouldnotbesure,givenhowdeterminedKillianseemedtohandleme.Thatbeingsaid,Killianwasloyaltomyfather’sorders.IwonderedifmyfatherretractedhisoffertomakemeKillian’sbrideoncehe’ddecidedtomakepeacewiththevampires.Orwasitstillonthetable?
Thatthoughthadmewalkingfaster.
Ivanchuckled,alreadyfallingbehind.“Slowdown,Princess.You’llgettherewithenoughtimetosayyourgoodbyes.”
WhileitwasmyfaultIvanbelievedIwasheadedintothewoodstohaveatrystwithCommanderKillian,Istillhatedtheimplicationinhistoneandvoice.
Ipausedabruptly.
“Didyouhearthat?”Iasked.
Ivanwentrigidandpeeredintothenight.Slicesofmoonlightpooledthroughouttheforest,cuttingbetweenthecanopyofbranchesoverhead.Apartofmefeltguilty.Ivanwaskind,hemeantwell,andIcouldtellhehadtransitioned,goingfromplayfultosoldier,hishandonthehiltofhisblade.
“Whatexactlydidyouhear,Princess?”heasked,aseriousedgetohisvoice.
“Itwasarattlingsound,”Isaid,whichwasusuallyasignthatavirikawasnear.Virikawerecreaturesthatmovedwiththeshadows.Theywereimpossibletoseeuntiltheybaredtheirbloodredteeth.Theycouldbestealthy,unlesstheywerehungry.Hungermadethemstupid.
“Followclosely,Princess,”saidIvan.
Ilethimwalkahead,trailingbehindhimasIbenttopickuparock.WecontinuedforalittlewhilelongerbeforeItossedthestoneintothewoodnearby.
“Whatwasthat?”Iwhisperedfrantically.
IvanturnedinthedirectionI’dthrownthestone,eyessearchingcautiouslyasIslippedawayintothedarkness.IdidnottakeoffatarununtilIheardIvanyell.
“Princess!”
Iwasn’tmadeforrunning,andIcertainlywasn’tdressedforit,butIpushedforward,runninguntilIcouldseethevampire’scampthroughthetrees,thenIpausedwithintheshadows.Unlikethisafternoon,thecampwasalivewithactivity,andIwastakenabackbyhowhumaneveryoneappeared.TheyweredressedinAdrian’scolors,thecolorsIimagineddecoratedthehallsofRevekka—redandblack.Flashesofgoldarmorthatlookedalmostfeatherlikeignitedlikeflameastheymilledabout,somegatheredaroundthefire,whileanothergrouplookedtobeplayingcards.Theyseemedcarefree—asiftheywerenotanarmyencampedinenemyterritory.
Thenagain,theyhadlittletofear.Theywereunbeatable.
IdidnotnoticeCommanderKillian.Iexpectedthatifhe’dattemptedtoenterthecamp,hewouldhavebeencapturedbynow.
JustasIwasabouttodartfromthetreelineandheadstraightforAdrian’stent,avoicesoundedfrombehindme.
“Thatwasveryunkind,whatyoudidtoyourguard.”
IwhirledtofindavampireIdidnotrecognizebehindme,andIhatedthatIhadnotbeenabletosensehisapproach.Istumbledbackand,consequently,outofthetreeline,andthevampireadvanced.Themoonlightcastbeamsoflightoverhisbody,illuminatingsliversofdarkskinandaprettyface—widecheekbones,fulllips,andasetofdimplesoneithersideofhismouth.
“Howlonghaveyoubeenfollowingme?”Iasked.
“Iwasn’t,”hesaid.
Mybackmetsomethinghard,andhandsclampeddownonmyshoulders.Ireachedback,grabbedthem,andreleasedmydaggersintotheperson’sforearms.Ascreamthatsoundedmorelikeawoundedgrowleruptedintothenight,andItwistedtofindanothervampire.Thisonewasslimmer,hishairhangingstraightandlankyaroundathinface.Hisfistswereclenched,andblooddrippedfromhisforearms
“Fuck,shestabbedme!”hecried.
Behindme,theothervampirelaughed.“Servesyourightforassumingshewasunarmed.”
“Sorin,whatisgoingon?”anothervoicejoinedthemix.Thisonewasfemale.
“Icaughtamortalsneakingintocamp,”saidthedarkvampire.“ShestabbedIsac.”
Thewomanwhoapproachedwasblond,herhairpulledintoanintricatebraidthatranfromthetopofherheadtothemiddleofherback.Shewasbeautifulandfierce,andshesoundedasifshewerelaughing.
“Stabbedyou,Isac?”
“Shutup,Miha,”hesnapped.
Therewerenowthreevampiresstandinginanarcbeforeme,andIwasshockedIwasstillalive.EventheoneI’dstabbedseemedrelativelycalm,andI’dexpectedhimtoretaliatequickly.Instead,hisarmsquitshaking,andbloodstoppeddrippingfromhiswounds.Soon,heletthemfalltohissides,healed.
Anexplosionofcheerssoundedbehindussuddenly,andIturnedtoseethegroupofvampireswhohadpreviouslybeenplayingcardsontheirfeet.Twomenwereontheground,fighting.
MiharolledhereyeswhileSorinandIsacchuckled.“Iknewthatgamewouldendinaquarrel.”
“Fourkingsalwaysdoes,”saidSorin.
Ididnotaskwhatfourkingswas.Instead,Istartedtoshiftawayfromthetrioofvampires,untiltheirattentionreturnedtomeandIfroze.
“Sowhatareyoudoinghere,littleone?”Mihacontinued.“Haveyoucometoseduceandkillourking?”
Iwastoosurprisedbyherquestiontocomplainthatshe’dcalledmelittleone.Mybrowsrose.“Excuseme?”
“Itwouldn’tbethefirstattempt,”Sorinsaid.
“I—no,”Isaidandpaused.“Didyoujustsayitwouldn’tbethefirstattempt?”
“That’sright,”Sorinquipped.
“Whathappenedtothewomanwhotriedthat?”
Icouldn’thelpmyself.Iwascurious.WasAdriancapableofbeingseduced,orhadhemurderedeverywomanwhotried?
Thethreeofthemexchangedalook,andbeforeSorincouldspeak,anothervoicejoinedthefray.
“PrincessIsolde.Whatasurprise.”
IwhirledtofaceAdrianwhilethethreevampiresbehindmeacknowledgedhim.
“Myking,”theysaid.
“Icaughthersneakingintocamp,YourMajesty,”saidSorin.
“Shestabbedme,”saidIsac.
“Westoppedherbeforeshecouldreachyourtent,”Mihaadded.
Adrianlookedatmeforalongmomentandthenspoke.“PrincessIsoldeismybetrothed.Shemaycometomytentwhenevershewishes.”
Itwasn’tawish.Thiswasbusiness,butIsaidnothing.
“Youcouldhavesaidthat,”saidIsac,“insteadofstabbingme.”
Iturnedtolookathim.“Youweretheonewhotouchedme.”
“Ontheshoulders,”headded,asiftoclarifyforAdrian’ssake.
“Yourpoint?”
Theothertwovampiresweresmiling,andbehindme,Adrianchuckled,whichdrewmygaze.Whenhewasn’tlaughingatmyexpense,thesoundwasactually…warm.
“Youlaugh,”Isaidandtiltedmyheadbacktobettermeethiseyes,“butheisnottheonlyonewhowillfeelthestingofmyblade.”
Adriantouchedmychin,andthistime,Imanagednottoflinch.“Mysweet,Ilookforwardtothat.”
Someoneclearedtheirthroat,andIlookedatthethreevampires,whohadallavertedtheireyes,lingeringawkwardly.
“We’rejustgoingto…go,”Sorinsaid,andIwatchedthethreefallbackintotheshadowsofthewood.
IreturnedmyattentiontoAdrian,whowasstillwatchingme.
“Youwereheadingtomytent?”heasked.
“Ineedtospeakwithyou,”Isaid.
Hestaredand,afteramoment,indicatedformetofollow.“Come.”
Wewalkedsidebyside,andaswecamearoundtothefrontofhistent,Igotabetterlookattheircamp.Thefirstthingthattookmebysurprisewasthesightofseveralfires,overwhichamortalmancooked.Thesmellofsizzlingmeatsandseasoningswaftedtowardme,andmystomachturned.
“Whatishecooking?”Iasked,mystomachturning.Ididn’tthinkitwashumanmeat,butIwantedtobesurenevertheless.VampiresdidnoteatasfarasIknew.
Adrianraisedabrow.“Lamb.Forthemortalswhotravelwithus.”
“Youletmortalstravelwithyou?”
“Howdoyouthinkweeat?”heasked.
Hisquestionwassocasual,andyetitmademybloodruncold.Iwasnotawarethatmortalstraveledwithhisarmy,thoughtherewerestoriesofpeoplewhofledtoRevekkatogainimmortalitybyofferingtheirbloodinthehopethattheywouldeventuallybeturnedintoavampire.ThepracticewascalledbloodlettingandseenastreasonoustoallkingdomsoftheNineHouses.Itwasalsoanautomaticdeathsentence.
Adriandirectedmeintohistent,lettingmeenteraheadofhim.Inside,itwaswarm,theheatwaftingfromabrazieratitscenter.Thesightofitcausedmetohesitateattheentrance,andAdrianbumpedintome.Insteadofstaggeringaway,hishandtouchedmywaist.
“Youaresafehere,”hesaid,mistakingmyfearofthefireforafearofhim.
Imovedforwardquickly.Atmyfeetplushrugscoveredmostoftheground,andaroundtableandseveralwoodenfoldingchairswerearrangedtooneside.Therewasalsoadesk,uponwhichamapofCordovawasspread,andIfoughteveryurgetoapproachandreadhisplansformyworld.AbedtookuptheothersideofthetentanditwasthatIfocusedon,becauseitwasoccupiedbyaverynakedwoman.Shewasstretchedout,completelyexposed,creamyskinburnishedbyfirelight.Shejerkedintoasittingpositionwhenshesawusenter,notbotheringtodragtheblanketsuptocoverherself.Sheonlystared,wide-eyed,asifshehadnotexpectedAdriantobringavisitor.
“Out,”Adriansnapped,andshefled.Iwatchedhergo,feelingirritatedthathehadn’tbeenalone.
“Willyourmistressjoinusonourweddingnight?”Iasked,glaringathim.
“Alreadydreamingofourtimetogether?”hecounteredandthenofferedasmile.“Sheisnotmymistress.”
“Soyouwouldn’thavesleptwithher?”
Hestared.“IsupposeitdependsonhowI’mfeeling.”
Inarrowedmyeyesuponhim.“You’resupposedtosayno,atleasttomyface.Unlessyouwishtoconductourmarriageopenly.Inwhichcase,shallIstartscoutingforpotentiallovers?”
Adrian’smouthhardened.“Areyoudemandingfidelity?”
“Iwillfollowasyoulead,”Isaid.Itwasataunt.
“Itisearlytomakedemands.Wehavenotevenwedyet.”
“Ifmyrequestissuchaburden,thencallofftheengagement,”Ichallenged.Iwalkedfartherintothetent,keepingmydistancefromthefireatthecenter.Theflamesseemedtoohighandtooangry.
“Oh,mysweet,thingshavebecomefartoointerestingforthat,”hesaidandthentiltedhisheadtotheside.“Whyareyouhere?”
Ihesitatedforamoment.Maybethiswasamistake.Asthewordscameoutofmymouth,theyseemedridiculous.“Ineedapromisefromyou.”
Adrian’spalebrowsroseoverhisstrangeeyes.
“Goon.”
“Itwon’tsurpriseyoutoknowthatCommanderKillianhatesyou,evenmoreaftertoday.Ithinkhebelieveshecouldkillyouandfreemefromourengagement.Ineedyoutopromisethatifhetriestoattack,youwillnotseekretributionagainstmypeople.”
Adrianstaredatmeforalongmoment.
“Whatwillyougivemeinexchangeforthispromise?”
“IwarnedyouofKillian.Isthatnotenough?”
“YouhavetoldmenothingIdidnotalreadyknow.YourcommanderhasbeenplanningwaystokillmesinceIlandedonyourdoorstep.”
Istaredathim.“Whatdoyouwantfromme?”
“Everything,”hesaid.“Butfornow,Iwillsettlefortheanswertowhyyoudonotwalknearthefire.”
Istaredathim,surprisedhehadnoticed,andthenlookedtowardtheflames.Acknowledgingmyfearoffireseemedsominimalcomparedtoanythingelsehecouldhaveasked,soIansweredtruthfully.
“Iamafraidoffire,”Isaid.“IhavebeensinceIwasachild.”
“Wereyouburnedasachild?”Adrianmovedcloser.
“No,”Isaidandtheninhaledaninvoluntary,shakybreath.TherewasmoretothisthanIwantedtoadmit,anunexplainablepanicthatcameatnightwhenIclosedmyeyes.ItwasahorrorAdrianhadnorighttoaccess,soIsaidnothingmore.
Still,hewasstaring,andhisgazeburnedworsethananyfire.
“Whydoyouask?”
“Youaretobemywife,”hesaid.
Nowhewasbehindme,andthoughhedidnottouchme,Ifelthimthroughthetensionbetweenus.Hisbodycalledtomine,amagneticpullthatgraspedmyhipsandshoulders.Ittookeverythinginmypowernottobowintohim.
Iwassofocusedonkeepingmybodyincheckthatwhenhespokeagainstmyear,Igasped.“Tellme,doesCommanderKillianvisityourbedoften?”
Jealousywasastrangetraitbetweenstrangers,andyetithadreareditsheadtwicebetweenusnow.AtleastIwasnotaloneinmyirrationality.
Iturnedmyhead,eyesfallingtohislips,whichwereonlyaninchfrommine.
“Whatmakesyouthinkhevisitsmybed?”
“Iknowjealouslovers,”hesaid.“DoesyourcommanderthinkthatifIamdead,hecanhaveyou?”
“Nooneownsme,KingAdrian.”
“Idonotseektoownyou,”hesaidbutdidnotelaborate.
Again,Ifoundmyselfwonderingwhyhehadchosenme.Iturnedtofacehim,myshoulderbrushinghischestasImoved,glaringupathim.
“DoIhaveyourwordyouwillnotretaliate?”Iasked.
“Iwillnotseekrevengeagainstyourpeople,butIwillnotpromisetospareyourcommander.”
Ifeltthecolordrainfrommyface.“AndifIaskyoutosparehim?”
IcouldnotexplainthelookonAdrian’sface,butIthoughtthatmaybehefelttriumphatmyquestion,asifhe’dsnaredmeintoanotherbargain.Hetookastepawayandsatinoneofthefoldingchairs.Hewasrelaxed,onelargehandrestingonthearm,hislonglegsspreadwide,asifininvitation.
“Wouldyouspareamanwhotriedtokillyou?”heasked.
Ihesitatedbutansweredtruthfully.“No.”
“ThenwhyshouldIspareyourcommander?”
Becausehe’sanidiot,Iwantedtosay.“BecauseIaskedyouto.”
Hestared,andmyeyeswandereddownhisstrongframe.
“Youaskformuch.”
“Thinkofitasaweddinggift,”Isaidslowly.
“Aweddinggift,”herepeated.
“Doyounotwishtopleaseme?”Iasked.
Adrian’sheadtiltedagain,andhislipsquirked.“OfcourseIwishtopleaseyou.”
Iapproached,drivenbyaneedtoextractmypromisebutalsoacuriosity—howclosewouldheletmeget?AndifIcouldgetclose…couldIkillhimmyself?IrecalledLordCristian’swords,wonderingifeveryoneinthekingdomhadthesameexpectationofme.
Adrianwatchedme,eyesaflameasIsettledmykneebetweenhisthighs.
“Thenpleaseme,”Iwhisperedandgingerlyplacedmyhandsonhischest.Hewassurprisinglywarm,andthemusclesbeneathmypalmswerehard.Hestillhadnotmoved,hadnotplacedhishandsuponme,andtheonlyindicationthathewasarousedwasthehardlengthpressedagainstmyknee.
Islippedmyhandsuphischest.Ifhewouldletme,Icouldshovemybladeintohisneckandjerkitthrough.MyknivesweresharpenoughtocutboneifIgottheangleright.
“Isthatwhatyoureallywant?”hemurmured,hiseyesneverleavingmine.
“Yes.”
HesmirkedandliftedhisheadjustaninchsothatIcouldfeelhisbreathonmylipsashespoke.“BecauseIthinkyouwanttokillme.”Inthenextsecond,hemoved.Oneofhishandsgrippedbeneathmyknee,andtheothermovedaroundmywaistashestood,sealingourbodiestogether,trappingmyhandsbetweenus.Igrippedhisshirtinmyfists,andmyleghitchedaroundhiship,hiserectionpressedagainstthesoftnessofmybody,ahardedgeIwantedtoride,butIkeptstill,glaringathimashespoke.“Andifthatisthecase,Ishouldwarnyounowthatanyattemptwillbemetwithmywrath.”
“Asifyourwrathcouldbeanyworse,”Ispat.
“Oh,mysweet,”hesaidandmovedtogripmyface.Hewassoquick,sofluid,Icouldnotreact,andashespoke,hiswordswhisperedacrossmylips.“Icouldturnyouinaninstant.”
Thenhetiltedmyheadback,lipstrailingalongmyneck.Myfingerssqueezedhisshirttighter.“Andthenwhatwouldyoube?”
Hewaiteduntilhedrewbacktolookmeintheeyesbeforeheanswered.“Nothingmorethantheundeadyouhate.”
Ishovedagainsthim,andhereleasedme.Westaredateachotherforamoment,andIwonderedwhatAdrianwasthinking.Washetornbetweenfightingandfucking?
Iwas.
Instead,IcametomysensesandreturnedtowhyIhadcomeheretobeginwith.
“DoIhaveyourwordthatyouwillnotretaliateagainstmypeople?”
Adrianglared,asifnowthequestionannoyedhim.“Wemadeanagreement,”hesaid.“Isworetoprotectyourpeoplesolongasyouagreedtobemywife.Iwillupholdmypromise,evenwhenothersdonot.”
Iknewhisfinalwordsweredirectedatme,butIhadpromisedtomarryhim,nothingmore,nothingless,andasmuchasIwantedtofighthim—tokillhim—Imanagedtocontainmyhatredandinsteadexpressedmygratitude.
“Thankyou.”
Adrian’sexpressionsoftenedalittle.Hedidnotspeakbutbowedhisheadinacknowledgment.
“I…Ishouldgo,”Isaidandtookastepaway.
“Iwillescortyou,”hesaid.
“Thatwon’tbenecessary.”
“Itis,”hesaid,“ifIamcorrectinassumingyourcommandergaveyouthatbruise.”
Ilookedatmyarm.Inourearlier…struggle…mycloakhadfallenovermyshoulder.MygazecutbacktoAdrian.
“Iwilltakecareofit,”Isaid.
“OfthatIhavenodoubt,butwhatifIwishforaturn?”
“Areyouofferingtodefendmyhonor?Howchivalrous.”
“Ithasnothingtodowithchivalry,”heanswered.“Iinsist.”
Ididnotargue,ifonlybecause,inAdrian’spresence,Imightescapealecturefromtheguards.Weexitedhistentandheadedtowardthewoodsoncemore,butattheborder,wecametoahalt,face-to-facewithKillianandIvan—Killianwhosefacewastwistedwithanger,andIvanwholookedpaleandembarrassed.IhopedKillianwasn’ttoohardonhim.
“Isolde,”Killiansaid,andhiseyesshiftedtothevampirebesideme.“KingAdrian,Iwilltakeherfromhere.”
Hestartedtoreachforme,andAdrian’shandshotout,clampingdownuponKillian’swithahardsmack.
“Youhavealreadytouchedheroncewithoutinvitation,”hesaid.“Youwillnotdosoagain.”
IsawIvanglancewarilyatKillianasthecommanderjerkedaway.
“YouwillforgivemeifIdonottrustyoutoseetomyfiancée’ssafereturn.”
“Asifsheissafewithyou,”Killiansneered.
“Wewillletthebruisesspeakforthemselves,”Adriansaid.
Thecommanderpaled,anditwasthefirsttimeIthinkherealizedjusthowhardhehadhandledme.Still,hishandflexedoverhisblade,butbeforehecouldpullit,Isteppedbetweenthem.ItwasthesecondtimeI’dgivenAdrianmyback,thesecondtimeI’dputmyselfbetweenhimandKillian.
“IhaveacceptedKingAdrian’sescort,Commander.Youmayreturntoyourposition.”
Hislipspressedthin,andhiseyesshonewithanger.Itwasthesameangerthathadledhimtoreachformeearlier.
“Fine,”hesaidatlast,andmyearsbledwiththewordshedidn’tsay:Yourfatherwillhearofthis.Butwhatcouldeitherofthemreallydo?IwasAdrian’sbetrothed,andthistimetomorrow,Iwouldbehiswife.Iwatchedhimgo,disappearingwithIvaninthedark.
After,IwalkedastepaheadofAdrianallthewaytothecastle.AsIhadpredicted,Avramsaidnothingaswepassed,alonesinceIvanhadyettoreturnformtheborder,probablystillinthemiddleofaseveretongue-lashingfromKillian.Iwouldhavetoapologizetomorrow.Ipassedthroughthegateswithoutstopping,andIintendedtocontinuetothecastlewithoutlookingbackatAdrian,exceptasIsweptpastthesentrybox,hecalledtome.
“Allthestarsinthesky,”Adriansaid.
Thewordsmademyheartrace,andIhaltedasananswerthatwasnotmyownformedinmymind—arenotasbrightasmyloveforyou.
ButwhenIturnedtolookathim,hewasgone.Five
Ispentmymorninginmymother’sgardensurroundedbymidnightroses—oneoffewflowersthatbloomedinourwinter.Ihadbeentoldtheyweremymother’sfavorite,withthick,velvetpetalsthatweresorichinthecolorpurple,theyalmostlookedblack.Thecoldcouldnotmanagetoburnawaytheirsmelleither,whichwasstrongestintheearlymorning—asweet,warmscentthatremindedmeofthewoodsandwarmkitchens.
Thegardenwasoneofmyfavoriteplacesinthewholekingdom,andItriednottothinkaboutthefactthatthiswouldbeoneofmylastvisits.Eachflowerherehadbeencarefullyselected,planted,andcultivatedbymymother.Aftershedied,myfatherhadseenthatthecarefelltothepalacegroundskeepers.Itwasmuchthesameaswhenshedied,exceptthattherewerefarmoreblooms,theshrubswerelusher,andthetreesweretaller.
Shewouldhavelovedit,butsinceshecouldn’t,Iloveditforher.
Itwasn’tuntilNadiacametocollectmethatIhadtofacewhatthisdaytrulymeant—change.SheinformedmethatAdrianwasmeetingwithmyfatheragaintogooverthedetailsofmydeparturetomorrowandthatmytrunkswerealreadybeingpacked.
“Sosoon,”Isaid,myvoicequiet,andIlookedaroundthegardenthroughhazyvision,mychesttightening.Ihadnotexpectedtostaylongafterthemarriage.IdidnotimagineAdrianfeltcomfortablehere—evenbeingunstoppable,hewasnotwelcome.Still,IhadthoughtI’dhavemoretimetosaygoodbye.
“Yourfatherextendedhiswelcome,”Nadiasaid.“ButtheBloodKingrefused.Icannotimaginewhyheisinahurrytoreturnyoutohiskingdom,unlesshehopestoisolateyoufromus.”
IdidnotknowAdrianwell,butIdidnotthinkhisreasonforleavingLaraquicklywastoisolateme.ThatseemedmorelikesomethingKillianwoulddo.
“Ijustcannotbelievethatintwodays’time,youwillnolongerbehere.”Shepausedandtookashudderingbreath,anditwasthenIrealizedshewascrying.“WhatwillIdowithoutyou?”
“Oh,Nadia,”Isaidandreachedforherhand.Ididnotreactwellwhenotherscried,especiallyNadia,andmyinstinctwasalwaystomakeherlaugh.“Isupposeyouwillread.”
Welaughedtogetherbeforeleavingthegardentoprepareforthewedding,whichwouldtakeplaceatsunset.
Wedecidedtousemymother’ssuite,sincemyroomwasbeingpacked.WhenIwasyounger,Ispentmuchofmytimehere,pretendingshewasaliveandthatshemightcatchmeatanymomentplayingwithherthings.Ofcourse,Nadiawastheonewhofoundme,notmymother.Thoughshenevermademeleave.Instead,shetoldmestoriesabouthowmymother’smarriagehadbeenarranged—abridgebetweentheinlandsandtheislands.Hownervousmymotherhadbeentomarrymyfather,buthowconfidentshehadbeenthatshewouldlovehim,becausehehadbeenkind—andbecauseherpeoplebelievedinfateanddestiny.
Ibelievedinneither.
Isatathervanitynowwithdreadanddarknessinmyheartandnohopeforlove,whileNadiaworkedmycurlsintoatightbunofbraidsandtwists.
“Ouch!”IseethedasNadiagougedmyheadwithanotherhairpin.
“Donottouch!”shecommanded,slappingmyhandsawayasIreacheduptosoothetheplaceshe’djabbed.
“Thendon’tstabme!”
Nadiaplacedherhandsonherhipsandhuffed.She’ddonemyhairmywholelife,andthiswashoweveryattemptended—withherfrustratedandmyscalpbleeding.
Isighedandrubbedthespacebetweenmybrowswhereafaintachewasforming.
“Ididn’tmeantosnap,Nadia.”
“It’sallright,mylove.Icannotimaginewhatmustbegoingthroughthatheadofyours.”
Shecouldn’t.
BecauseIwasthinkingaboutAdrian,onceagainwonderingwhyhewantedaqueen.Whatroledidheenvisionforme?WasItositathissideasanequal?Icouldnotimagineavampiretreatinghismortalwifeasmorethanfood,andyethehaddemandedmyvoicebeheardwhenotherswouldsilenceme.Hehadalsopromisednottofeedfromme…unlessIasked.
Icringed.Weweretaughtinsanctuarythattheactofdrinkingbloodwasvilebecauseitwastheactofstealinggoddess-givenlife,butIfeltitwasvileforadifferentreason:becauseofwhatitmadeus—prey.WhywouldIeverasktobemadeavictim?Andhowcouldsomethingthathadcausedsomuchdeath,resurrection,andpainbepleasurable?
PerhapsAdrianwasasadist.
IsupposedIwouldfindouttonight.Thinkingofourweddingnightshouldmakemystomachsour,butinstead,IfoundIfeltwarmatthethought.
Oncemyhairwasdone,Nadiahelpedmeintomydress—ablack,sleevelessgownthatflaredatthewaist.Goldlacecreatedahalterthatclaspedaroundmyneckanddanceddowntheskirtofmydress.Trini,theseamstress,hadwovenlarksintothedesign.Itwasbeautifulwork,regalworkthatspokeofpowerandelegance.
Ihadonlywornitonce—attheReapingFeast,whichwasacelebrationofthefallharvest.ItwasthesamenightI’dpointedadaggerinLordSigeric’sfaceforsuggestingIneededtobetamed.Iwonderednow,asNadialacedmeintothedress,wouldAdriantrythesame?
Nadiacrossedtheroomtoopenagildedcabinetwheremymotherhadstoredhertiaras.They’dalwaysbeenunlikeanythinganotherroyalworethroughoutCordovabecausethey’dcomefromtheAtoll.Somewerecircletsmadefromexotic-lookingflowersI’dneverseenbefore,othersweremadeofpearl,andsomeofpreciousshell.Amongthemwashergoldcoronationcrown,eachfringeinlaidwithwhiteandblackdiamondsfromherhomeland.Nadiaturnedwithitbetweenherhandsandsaid,“Todayyouwillbecomeaqueen.”
Iallowedhertosettlethecrownuponmyhead.Itwasheavywiththeweightofmypast,present,andfuture.
Iturnedtostareatmyself,andIlookedsad,grievinganduncertain,butproud.Iknewduty,especiallytomypeople,andIwouldmarryAdriantosavethem.
“Youshouldkillhim,”Nadiasaid,andIshiftedtomeethergazeinthemirror.Adrian’swordsfromlastnightreturned—thethreathe’dmadewithmybodypressedagainsthis.
Oh,mysweet.Icouldturnyouinaninstant.
“Nadia—”
Iwasn’tsurewhatIwasgoingtosay,butIknewIwasgoingtoprotest,andthatthoughtreallydidmakemystomachclench.Despitehisthreat,IshouldstillbeplanningtheBloodKing’sdeath.
Iturnedtowardher.AsIdid,shedrewadaggerfromherpocket.Itwasbeautiful,thehiltandscabbardmadewithgold-platedsteelandredrubies.
“Nadia.”
ThistimewhenIsaidhername,Isoundedbreathless.
“Takeit,”shesaid.“Itisagift.”
Sheurgedthedaggerintomyhands,andIunsheatheditwithasnick.Thebladewasnarrow,sharp,andunmarred.
“Killhim,Issi,”shesaid.“Don’tgivehimthesatisfactionofclaimingvictoryovertheHouseofLara.”
ImetNadia’sgaze.
“Itisthehonorablethingtodo,”sheadded,holdingontomychin.Sheleanedforwardandpressedakisstomyforeheadbeforeleavingtheroom.
Istareddownatthedaggerandthenatmyself.
Youarethehopeofourkingdom,Issi,myfatherhadsaid.DidthatmeanIshouldfulfillmyagreementtomarryAdrianandstepintotheroleasqueenofRevekka,ordidthatmeanIwasonewhocouldgetcloseenoughtokillhim?
Therewasaknockatmydoor,andIjumped,notpreparedtobedisturbedsosoonafterNadia’sdeparture.
“Amoment!”
Islippedthebladeintoitssheathandshoveditbetweenmybreasts—asnuganduncomfortablefit,butitwastheonlyplacetohideitonmyperson,andIwantedtobearmedatmywedding.
Iturnedtowardthemirrorandpretendedtoadjustwispsofmyhair.
“Comein.”
MyhandsfelltomysidesasIglimpsedmyvisitorinthemirror.KingAdrianhadenteredmysuite,dressedinablacktunicandanovercoatlinedwithintricategoldstitching.Itdidnotescapemethatwematched.
Iturnedtofacehim,takinginhisoverwhelmingpresence.Thekingwastallandfilledmychamberlikeeveningshadows.Hishairfellingoldenwavespasthisshoulders,anduponhishead,heworeacrownofblackspires.Hisstrangewhite-blueeyesheldmyattentionandthenlowered,tracingapathdownmybodythatleftmeholdingmybreath,warminplacesthatshouldbeasdeadashislifelessheart.Thefactthattheyweren’tmademefeellikeatraitortomypeople—andangrywithhim.
“Youaren’tsupposedtoseemebeforetheceremony.It’sbadluck.”
Itwasaridiculousthingtosay.Badluckhadproceededthiswholething,butIwasgrowingnervousunderhisstare,whichonlyseemedtodarkenthelongerhelooked.
Adrian’slipscurled.Icouldn’treallycallitasmile.Thenhespoke,hisvoicetricklingdownmyspinelikedropsofcoolwater.Suddenly,mymouthwasdry
“Consideringthereasonsforourmarriage,IthinkIwillchanceit.”
Heclosedthedoorbehindhim,andIheardthedistinctsoundofmylockclickingintoplace.Mybackstraightenedpainfully,andIwashyperawareofthemetalhiltdiggingintothesoftnessofmybreasts.
“CanIhelpyou,YourMajesty?”Iaskedcurtly.
Hisapproachwasgraceful,hiseyeslockedonmine.
“Imerelywishedtolookuponmybridebeforewearetoexchangeourvows.”
Irefrainedfromrollingmyeyes.
“Havingsecondthoughts?”Iasked,elevatingmyvoicetowhatIthoughtsoundedhopeful.
Hechuckled.
“No,ifanything,Iammoredeterminedtomakeyoumywife.”
Hepausedbeforeme,andnowIcouldsmellhim,anditremindedmeofcedarforests.Afresh,crispscentthathitlikecold,mistymornings.Itwascalming,butonlyforamoment,becausewhenIrealizedwhatwashappening,Istiffened,glaringupathim.
“Whyisthat?”
Heliftedhishandslowly,studyingmyeyesashispalmfellflushagainstmycheek.Iswallowedandletashudderingbreathescapebetweenmylipsashisthumbbrushedmyskin.
“Doyoutremblebecauseyoufearme?”heasked.
“Yes,”Ibreathed,becauseIwouldneveradmitotherwise—thathistouchhadaheatforminglowinmystomach.
Hedroppedhishand.
“ThenwhydoIsensearousal?”
“Thatis…”Icouldn’tfindwords.
“Denyit,”hesaid.“Ifitwillmakeyoufeellessofatraitor.”
“Iwasn’tgoingtodenyit,”Isaid.“Butitisvulgarnonetheless.”
“Hmm.”Thecornersofhismouthtiltedagain.“Iamvulgar.”
Ilookedaway,nolongerabletomaintaineyecontact,andasked,“Didyoucomeheretotauntme?”
“Iwouldnevertauntyou,”hesaid.
“Itsuredoesn’tseemthatway.”
“Thatisbecauseyouareashamed,”hesaid.
Hiswordsdrewmygazebacktohim.Thistime,hemovedquickly,securinghishandbehindmyhead.“Soon,however,Ihopeyouwillfindprideinbeingmywife.”
Thenhebroughthislipstomine,sealingourmouthstogether,andsomethingdarkandfrenziedflourishedwithinmybody.Itwaslikeaspellovertookme,andeveryinchofmyskinburnedwiththeneedtobetouchedbyhim.Myhandsskimmedoverhischestandintohishair,andwhenhegroaned,Irewardedhimbyopeningmymouthsohecouldtasteme.Asourtonguestwinedandslidtogether,hetookmebysurprise,drivingmeintomyvanity,mybackbowedbeneathhimashedevoured,myhandspressingintohishardmuscles,hiserectiongrindingintothesoftnessofmyheat.Ifoundmyselfgaspingatthefeelofhimbetweenmylegs,andasmyhipsmovedagainsthis,IknewI’dgiveanythingtoknowwhatitwouldbeliketohavehiminsideme.
“Saythataloudtome,”hegrowledagainstmylips,andashespoke,Ifroze.Hisfacewasinchesfrommine,hiswhite-rimmedeyesholdingmygaze.
“What?”Iasked,breathinghard.
Thecornersofhislipslifted.“Youwantmeinsideyou,”hesaid.“Sayitaloud.”
Ishovedagainsthim,andtomysurprise,hesteppedaway.
“Youcanreadminds?”Iasked.Istillcouldn’tcatchmybreath,andIhatedthatbecauseitwasareminderofhowI’dlethimtakeadvantageofme.
“Youwelcomedmewithopen”—hiseyesdrifteddownmybodyandthenbackup—“arms.”
“Getoutofmyhead!”
Ipushedhimagain,buthegraspedmywristsandpulledmeflushagainsthim.
“Donotbeashamedbyyourthoughts,Sparrow.Ifit’sanycomfort,Iwishtoknowthesamething.”
InarrowedmyeyesatthesuddenuseofanicknameIhadnotapprovedandjerkedinhisgrasp,butheheldmetighter.
“Yourhairisbeautiful.”
Mybrowsknittedtogether.“What?”
Itwasn’tuntilthatmomentthatIrealizedthetightcoilNadiahadworkedsolongtostylehadsprungfree.Itoremyselffromhim,staggeringback.Hisstarepinnedme,darkandlustful.
“Atleastwecanbesureofonething,Sparrow.”
“Andwhatisthat?”Iasked,seething.Ihatedhimforhowhe’dmademefeelandthatheknewit.
“Webothknowwhatwehavetolookforwardtotonight.”Then,asifhethoughtIcouldnotguesswhathewasimplying,headded,“Whenweconsummateourmarriage.”
Hehadnoideawewouldnotevengetthatfar.Itwasmyturntosmirk.
“Ithinkyoushouldleave,KingAdrian,”Isaidandbroughtahandtomyhair.“Imustrestoremyappearance.”
Hiseyesglittereddarkly.
“Ofcourse,myqueen,”hesaidandbowed.
Whenhelefttheroom,ittookeverythinginmypowertoremainstanding.
Ihadjustfinishedpullinghalfmyhairback,leavingtheresttocurldownmyback,whenmyfatherarrived,dressedinroyalblue.Thecontrastbetweenuswasstark,ourcolorsclashing.Helookedgrimtoday,andthelinesaroundhismouthseemeddeeper.
“Father,”Isaid,risingtomyfeet.Ithrewmyarmsaroundhisneckandhuggedhim.
“MyIssi,”hesaid,andasweparted,hebrushedacurloffmyshoulder.“Youlookbeautiful.”
Ismiled.“Thankyou.”
Hiscomplimentwasgenuine,butIcouldfeelthestrangenessbetweenus.Wewereboththinkingthesamething—Ishouldnotlooksobeautifulforhim
“Ibroughtyousomething,”hesaidandheldupasmall,rectanglepackage.Itookitandsatonthebenchinfrontofthemirrorbeforetearingawaythebeigepapertorevealacarvedwoodenboxinlaidwithmother-of-pearl.Itremindedmeofthethingsmymotherkeptfromherhomeland.
“Openit,”myfatherencouraged,andwhenIdid,apurelullabychimed.
“Amusicbox,”Iwhispered.
“Yes.Ihaditmadeforyourbirthday…butsinceyouwillnotbehere,Ithoughtitafittinggiftfortoday.Thesongisoneyourmotherwouldhumbeforeyouwereborn.”
Myeyeswatered.“Whatisthesong?”
“Idonotknowthename,”hesaid.“Onlyafewwords.”
Hewasquietforamoment,andthenhespokethelines:
“Moonaboveandearthbelow,
Bringmylovestarsthatglow.
Farpastmidnight,shadowssneak;
Bringmylovedreamsthatspeak.”
Hisvoicetrailedoff,butthemusiccontinued,andwhenitdied,Ihuggedtheboxtomychest,myvisionblurredbytears.
“Iintendedthisdaytobehappier,”myfathersaid.
Ilookedathimandreachedforhishand—theskinwasthinandspotted.
“I’llbeallright,Papa.”
Rightnow,Icouldspeakthosewordswithsomelevelofbelief,becausetomorrowstillseemedsofaraway.Tomorrow,whenwewouldleaveLaraforRevekka.
“Willyou?”Hestaredatmyhandonhisforamomentandthenplacedhisotheratopmine.
“Solongasyouaresafe,Iwillbewell.”
Therewasaknockatthedoor,andNadiaentered.Herexpressionwasgraveasshespoke.“YourMajesty.”Shebowed.“Itisnearsunset.”
Whichmeantitwastime.
Myfatherstoodandheldouthishandformetotake.Ileftthemusicboxbehindandwalkedbesidehimdownthecoldcorridorsofourcastle,outthemainentrance.WemadeourwaytotheSanctuaryofAsha,flankedbytheroyalgardens.
Ihadbeentootherweddings,bothroyalandnonroyal,andnonehadbeenthismorose.Laraweddingswerevibrantandexciting,grandaffairsthatlastedalldayandallnight.Well-wisherswouldlinethewalkwaystocheerforthecoupleandtossamaryllis,clematis,andbaby’sbreathattheirfeet,allofwhichwouldbegatheredbyflowergirlswhowouldmakeabouquetforthebride.
ButasIwalkedwithmyfather,therewerenowell-wishersandnoflowers—onlyguardswholedusandfollowedus.Killianwaitedatthetempledoors,radiatinganger.Ithitmeinwaves,crushingmychest,buthisfuryonlyignitedthesamewithinme,andIglaredathim.Iknewwhathewasthinking—thatIchoseAdrianoverhim—andIsupposed,inaway,Idid.Butthatdidn’tmatterwhenitwasn’tachoice.IheldtowhatIsaidbefore—Iwouldchooseneitherifithadbeenanoption.
AsetofKillian’sguardswerestationedoutsidethetempledoor,andasweapproached,theyopened.TheSanctuaryofAshasmelledlikedampearth,andaswecrossedthethreshold,wewereshroudedinadim,red-orangelight.Itcamefrombehindthealtar—alarge,twistedtreethatreachedtothedarknessabove—andthere,beforeit,wasAdrian.
Onceagain,Iwasstruckbyhisbeauty—bytheglowthatseemedtorisefromhisskinandhair.Ihatedhowmyeyesheldontohis,howforcefulhisgazefelt,howimmediatelymybodyresponded.Ihadnoabilitytocatchmyselforrepressthethoughts,andIwassureAdrianhadreadmymindbynow.BesidehimwasavampireIdidnotrecognize,buthewashandsome—justastall,lean,butathletic.Hehadshort,darkhairandadefinedjaw,hislipswerethin,andpronouncedbrowsmadehiseyesshadowy.
IheldAdrian’sgazeasIapproached.Aheavysilencefollowedus,anditwasAdrianwhobrokeitasIreleasedmyfather’sarmtofacehim.
“Youarestunning,”hesaid,smilingdownatme,hiseyesglitteringdarkly.
“Youforgottosaysoearlier,”Isaid.
Hesmirked.“Arewetalkingaboutthat?”
“Idon’tseewhynot,”Ireplied.“Welearnedvaluableinformationaboutoneanother.”
“Itsoundsasthoughyouwouldliketolearnmore.”
“Iwanttoknoweverythingaboutmyenemy,”Isaid.“ButIaminnohurry.Asyousodelicatelyremindedmeearly,wehaveallnight.”
Adriansmiled,showinghisteeth.“Oh,Sparrow.Therewillbenotimefortalking.”
Itwasmyfatherwhoclearedhisthroatasanotherpersonjoinedusinthesanctuary—Imelda,apriestessofAsha.Shewasdressedindeep-bluerobes,herhaircoveredwithahood,andapieceofsilverrestedagainstherforehead,disappearingunderherhood.Sheheldagoldcordbetweenherhands—itwouldbethecordthatboundusashusbandandwife,kingandqueen.
“Princess,YourMajesty,”shesaidandheldoutherhandsforeachofus.Therewasnothingtoindicatethestartofourvows,nowelcomeforthosewhogathered,notalkoftheimportanceofuniontobearchildren,aswascommon.Instead,Imeldamovedstraighttovows.Hervoicewasclearandwarm—abeautifultonethatputmeateasedespitewhatshewasabouttodo.“Thishandfastingsymbolizesyourpledgestooneanother.Doyouswearfromthisdayforwardtohonor,respect,andcommittoeachother?”
Shedidnotmentionlove,andIhadtoadmitthatmyheartsqueezed,mourningthelossofsomethingIwouldneverhave,evenasIhaddeterminedI’dneverwantedit.
“Ido,”AdrianandIsaidinunison,oureyesholding.
ThenImeldajoinedourhands.Adrian’sswallowedmine,andhispalmswererough.Ilikedthefeel,though,becauseminewerenosmoother.Itwasasignoftheliveswe’dlived.Alwaysonthedefense,alwaysreadytofight.
“Asyourhandsareboundtogetherbythiscord,sotooshallyourlivesbeboundasone.”Asthepriestessspoke,shebegantotiethecordaroundourhands.Icouldn’tlookaway,couldn’tstopthinkingabouthowAdrian’shandshadcapturedmyface,howtheywoulddescenddownmybodytonight.Thesewereblasphemousthoughts—thoughtsIwascertainhecouldhear.
Thepriestesscontinued,instructingustorepeathernextwords,andasshedid,theslitherofthecordcaressedmyskin,andmyfingerstightenedaroundAdrian’s,anunconsciousmovethatcamewiththevowsIspoke.
“Thesehandswillfeedyou,protectyou,andguideyou.Thesehandswilleaseyourpainandcarryyourburdens.Theywillholdyouandcomfortyou…”
MygazeliftedtoAdrian,whowatchedmewithfireinhiseyes,andIwonderedifhishandswouldeverofferanythingourvowspromised.Atmythought,hislipscurled,andIalreadyknewhismindwellenoughtoguesshisvulgarretort.
“Andsothebindingismade,”thepriestessfinished.“Asyourhandsareboundtogether,soyourlivesandsoulsarejoined.”
Withourhandsboundandourvowssworn,Adrian’smouthcoveredmine.Ibracedmyselfforhiskiss,expectingsomethingakintothepassionhe’ddisplayedinmychamber,butallheofferedwasaquickpressofhislipstomine,thenanotherontheedgeofmylipsbeforehestraightened.
Weturnedtogether,facingoursmallgathering,andInoticedmyfatherwavingaservantforward.Themancarriedatrayuponwhichwasaloafofhardbread.Ilookedtomyfather.
“Wethoughtitbestyoubreakbreadhere.”
Partofthehandfastingtraditionwasthepracticeofbreakingbreadashusbandandwife,usuallyatabanquetthatwouldfollowtheceremony.Ihadnotconsideredthattherewouldbenofeastincelebrationofmynewhusband.Thiswasmeanttobeaquietaffair,exceptthatwhileeveryoneinmykingdomcouldpretenditneverhappened,Iwouldstillbelivingthisnightmare.
Adriandidnotargueorchallengethearrangement.Itwaslikelyheknewthiswasforthebest.Ifwehadheldafeast,itwouldhaveincludedhumanandvampire,anddespitetheagreement,itwouldhavebeenwroughtwithtensionthatinevitablyledtobloodshed.
Adriantookthebreadandpulledapiecefromtheloaf.
“Hungry,Sparrow?”
“Starving,”Isaid,meaningtosoundsarcastic.Instead,Isoundedbreathless.
Adrianplacedahanduponmyfacewhilehebroughtthebreadtomylips.Iopenedforhim,andashepushedthefoodintomymouth,Ibitdownonhisthumb.
Heinhaledbetweenhisteeth,hishandtighteninginmyhair,andhebroughtmyheadclosetohisasifhemeanttokissme.TherewasmovementaroundusasAdriantuggedhisfingerfreeofmymouth,hislipspullingawayfromhisteethashesmiled.
“Iamsureyoumeanttoharm.Luckyforyou,Iliketeeth.”
HereleasedmeandIglaredathim,breakingapieceofbreadtofeedhim,butbeforeIcould,hisfingercaughtmywrist,holdingmyhandinplaceashetookthebreadintohismouth,suckingmyfingersbeforehereleased.Iinhaledasmycheeksflushed,embarrassedbyAdrian’sdisplay.Evenifhehadnotbeentheenemyofmypeople,Iwasnotkeenonpublicdisplaysofaffection.
Hereleasedmesuddenly,andIswallowedhard,myeyesleavinghistolookanywhereelse.
“Isolde,gowithNadia,”myfathersaid.
Everysensethathadbeenheightenedwithinmebottomedout.Myfacedrainedofallwarmth,andmystomachtwistedandsoured.Eventheairchanged,thickening.Everyone,evenmyfather,knewwhatIwasbeingsentofffor—topreparefortonight.
MyhandwasstilltiedtoAdrian’s.Ilifteditbetweenus,butbeforeIcouldmove,hislithefingerswerealreadyinmotion.Itwasstrangetowatchhislethalhandscarefullyworkthecordfree.Iexpectedviciousnessfromthisman,knowingthathewascapableofit,andyethere,intheSanctuaryofAsha,onewouldneverguesshewasawarlord.
Thesoftcordslippedfrommyhands,andAdrian’seyesliftedtomine.
“I’llkeepthisonhand,”hesaid.“Fortonight.”
Iknewhewasn’tjoking,anditwasn’thiswordsthatfrustratedmesomuchashistone.Hehadmadelightofourconsummationduringthiswholeevent,andinfrontofmyfather.Myangerboiledover,andIgatheredasmuchsalivainmymouthaspossiblebeforespittinginhisface.
“Isolde!”CommanderKillianspokemyname,andIfelthishandonmyarmasifhewishedtowhiskmeawaybeforeAdrianretaliated,exceptthatAdrian’scoldgazeturnedtohiminsteadofme.
“Releasemywife,Commander,”Adriansaid.“YouinsultmebyassumingIwouldharmher.”
“Lethergo,Killian.”Itwasmyfatherwhospoke.
IcouldtellbyKillian’sgripthathedidnotwanttoreleaseme,soIjerkedinhisgraspuntilhedidandglaredatAdrian.
“Iangeryou,”hesaid.“Iamsorry.Wewillspeakofthislater.Gowithyourmaid.”
IcouldnothidetheshockIfeltathissincerity,andforalongmoment,IwasrootedwhereIstood,staring.Thenhereachedoutahand,andIlethimbrushhisfingersalongmylipsandacrossmycheek.
“Iwillbealongshortly,”hesaid.
Iswallowedhardandturnedonmyheels.BeforeIknewit,Iwasrunningoutthesanctuarydoors—thedoorsI’denteredasaprincessandleftasaqueen—whileNadiafollowedafterme.Six
“Issi,wait!”Nadiacalled.
Ididn’tstoprunninguntilIwashalfwayacrossthegarden.Theeveninghadfaded,andtherewasnohintofthesettingsun,onlydarknessandstarlight.Mychestroseandfell,andIturnedmyheadtowardthesky.
IhadmarriedtheBloodKing.
Iwashiswife.
Ihadneverbeensoconflicted,sofrustratedwiththepushandpullofmybody.Ifeltinextremes—deephatredandburningdesire.Therewasnomiddleground,nosafewaytogoaboutthis.Wewouldcometogether,andwewoulderupt.
Nadiafinallycaughtupwithme,breathless.
“Bythegoddess,yourunfast!”shecomplained.Onceshewasrecovered,sheasked,“Areyouallright?”
Icouldnotanswer,andNadiamusthavetakenthatasasignofshock.
“Ofcourseyouaren’t,”shesaid.“Youjustmarriedamonster.”
Iflinched,thoughherwordsweretrue.
Shecontinued.“Icannotbelievethevulgar—”
“Canwenottalkaboutit,Nadia?”IknewwellenoughwhatAdrianhadsaid.Hiswordshadburroweddeepundermyskin.“Let’sjustgetthisoverwith.”
Istartedtowardthecastle,andNadiafollowed.“Youwillkillhim,won’tyou?”
Ididn’trespond.ItwasnotthatIwouldn’ttry;itwasthatIdidn’tknowifitwouldwork.
Ididnotreturntomyroomormymother’s.Instead,Nadialedmetoanothersuiteintheeasttowerwhereguestsusuallystayed.ExceptthatnoonehadcometothebordersofLarasincetheBloodKinghadbegunhisinvasion,saveforAdrianhimself.Inside,theroomsmelledlikedust.Alargebedtookupthefarwall,thefourpostersdecoratedinswathesofdarkvelvet.Asetofwindowslookedoutoverthewoodsandwouldofferaremarkableviewofthesunrisetomorrow.Ametalbathwaited,fullofsteamingwater.
Nadiahelpedmeoutofmygown,andbeforeitcouldpuddleatmyfeet,Iturnedtofaceher.Ikeptmyhandovermychest,inparttoholdthedressupbutalsotokeepthebladeI’dshovedbetweenmybreastsfromfallingtotheground.
“CanIbealone,Nadia?”
ItwasthesecondtimeI’ddismissedher,butthistime,shedidn’thesitate.
“Ofcourse.I’ll…checkonyoutomorrow.”
“WaituntilIsummonyou,”Isaid.“Please.”
Ididnotknowwhattomorrowwouldbring,butIknewI’dwanttimetocollectmyself.
Shestared,andafteramoment,shetookmyfaceintoherhands,pressingakisstomyforehead.“Ifhehurtsyou…”
“Hewon’thurtme,”Isaidandthenthought,unlessIhurthim.“Icantakecareofmyself,Nadia.”
“Butshouldyouhaveto?”sheasked.
“Perhapsyoushouldaskyourgoddess,”Isaid.
Itwasn’tafairthingtosay,butitwashowIfelt.
Nadiasighed,andInoticedtheshadowsbeneathhereyesasshespoke,“Iloveyou,sweetgirl.”
“Iloveyou,”Iwhispered,thewordsbarelyaudibleassheclosedthedoorbehindher.
Onceshewasgone,Ireleasedmydress,andasitfelltothefloor,Ipulledthebladefrombeneathmychemiseandcrossedtheroomtoshoveitbehindthebedwherethemattressmettheframe.IonlyhopedIcouldreachitwhenIneededit
Whenmyweaponwasinplace,Idiscardedtheshiftandloweredmyselfintothebath,revelinginthistimetomyself,becauseIknew,atleastforthenextweek,Iwouldnotbealoneagain.Ipushedthosethoughtsawayandinsteadfocusedonmybath—ontheheatofthewater,thesteamthatmademesweat,thevanilla-scentedoilthatpooledonthesurface.
Istayedinthewateruntilitwascoldandthenscrubbedmyskin,probablytoohard,tryingtoremovethestill-lingeringfeelofAdrian’stouch.ItwasfutilesinceIwouldseehimsoon,butIhopedthatmaybeIcoulderasethefeelingofwant,ofneed,ofdesirehehadinspiredinsideme.
Itdidn’twork.
IleftthebathstillhummingwithanelectricenergyIneededtoexpend.Itoweledoffandslippedintonothingbutasheerredrobe,notbotheringtotieit.Thepointofthiswasn’ttohide.Iwasputtingmyselfondisplay—meatonahookforthepredatortotaste—butitwouldalsoshowAdrianIwasunarmed,andhopefullyhewouldlethisguarddown.
Iwalkedtheperimeteroftheroom.Icouldtellnoonehadusedthisspaceforquitesometime.Athicklayerofdustcoveredeverything,andtheonlycleanitemintheroomwasthebedding.Istaredatitforawhile,unabletomovefromthespotwhereIwassupposedtoconsummatemymarriage,willingmyselftofeeldisgustedratherthanthisstrangestirringexcitement,andwhenIcouldnotmanage,Imovedtothewindow,justasthedoorbehindmeopened.
I’dhalfexpectedtoseeKillianandfeltguiltyforthedreadthatthoughthadgivenme.Instead,itwasAdrian.AsIturnedtofacehim,hehalted,unabletohidehissurprise.Iwassurehehadnotexpectedmetowaitforhimlikethis—inskinandredlace.
“Youarenotmodest,myqueen.”
“HaveIneedtobe?”
Adrianclosedthedoor,hisbootsthuddingagainstthefloorasheapproached.Heslippedoutofhiscoatandtosseditonthebed.Histunicfollowed.IswallowedhardasItookinhisbarechest—hisshoulderswerewide,hiswaistnarrow,andhismusclessculptedwithaprecisiononlyachievedthroughconstanttraining.AsmuchasImarveledathisbody,Ialsomarveledathisforwardness.
“Youhavedonethisbefore,”hesaid.Itwasn’taquestion.
Iwasn’tsurewhyIhesitated,buthesmiled,rueful,dark,almostlikehewaspromisingI’dthinkofnooneelsebeyondthisnight.
“Don’tworry.Ishallnotannulthemarriage,butIwilllookforwardtoagoodfucking.”
Inarrowedmyeyes,andheheldouthishand.
“Come.”
Ididnotmove,hiscommandanchoringme.
“Beforewefuck,Ihavequestions.”
Helethishandfalltohisside.“Idonotwishtotalk,”hesaid,eyesdarkening.
Iscowled.“AmItoliebackandbesilent?”
Hislipsquirked.“I’dratherhopedyou’dbejustasviciousasyouareinbattle.”
“Idrawbloodinbattle.Isthatwhatyouwant?”
“Ifyoumakethatapromise,I’llletyouaskyourquestions.”
“Youreadminds?”
HeansweredbytellingmewhatIwasthinking.“Onlywhenyouarevery…passionate.Likerightnow,youhatemysmirk.Earlier,youwonderedwhatmyskinwouldfeellikeagainstyours,whatIwouldfeellikeinsideyou.”
Iclenchedmyteethandquicklyturnedmythoughtstowardmynextquestion.
“Yesterdayinthewoods,youdrewwordsfrommymouthagainstmywill.”
“Isthataquestion?”
“Iwasn’tfinished,”Isaid,takingastepcloser.“Ifyoueverdothatagain,Iwillcutoffyourballsandshovethemdownyourthroat.Thatisapromise.”
Hisinfuriatingsmirkneverlefthisface.“Anythingelsebeforewebegin,myqueen?”
Ihadmorequestions,especiallyabouthismagic,butaskingthosewouldmeanadmittingtotheinsatiabledesireI’dfeltforhimthepastday,andwhileIknewhewasprobablywellaware,Icouldpretenditwasn’trealsolongasthewordsneverleftmymouth.
“Thatwasnotmagic,”hesaid,answeringmythoughts.
“Whatdoyoumeanitwasn’tmagic?Iwouldnever—”
“Desireamonster?”heasked,thentiltedhishead.“Tellmehowmanytimesyoutouchedyourselfandimagineditwasme.”
Ireachedtoshoveagainsthischest,buthecaughtmyhands.
“Youmockme,”Isnapped.
“Iamonlyaskingyoutoconfrontyourdesireforme.WillithelpifIadmittomine?”
Myeyesloweredtowherehisfleshbulged.Ididn’tneedhimtoadmittoit;Icouldseeit.
Hereachedoutandhisfingersbrushedmylips.Myhandclampeddownonhiswrist.
“Iwillkeepmypromisetoyou,”hesaid,holdingmygaze,andafteramoment,Iguidedhishanddownmythroattomychestwhere,againstmybetterjudgment,Iwantedhistouch.Thenhismouthcollidedwithmineandbothhandskneadedmybreaststhroughthelacerobe.Thefabriccreatedaroughfrictionthatteasedashisfingersrubbedmynipples.Idrewmyarmaroundhisneckashistonguepliedmymouth,tastingofwine.
Iwonderedabsentlyifhehadfedbeforecominghereandhadonlydrankwinetohidethetaste,butIcouldnotcontinuewiththatthoughtasAdrianliftedmeoffmyfeetandguidedmylegsaroundhiswaist.Onehandsplayedacrossmyback,theothergrippedmyass,andhegroundintome,sendingwavesofpleasurecoursingthroughmybody.Ifeltvolatileinhishands,andIwantedtoexplode.
Heguidedustothebed,andasIsankintothecovers,Adrian’smouthmovedfromminetomyneck.Histeethgrazedmyskin,andIwentrigid.
“Iwon’tfeed,”hewhispered,breathless.“Thoughyouaresweet.”
Hekisseddownmybody,betweenmybreasts,alongmystomach.Hisbodypartedmylegs,brushingmyclitashesatbackonhisheelsandlookeddownatme.Hedidnotwait,didnottease.Hisfingersjustpartedmyhotflesh,anditwasmorethanIcouldhaveeverimagined.Iarchedmyback,andasIdid,myhandsdisappearedunderthepillows.Briefly,IrememberedthatIshouldnotbeenjoyingthis.
Aboveme,Adrianhissedandthendescended,mouthclosingovermyclit.AsoundI’dneverheard,afeelingI’dneverfelteruptedfromthebottomofmystomach.IhatedhimforthisasmuchasIwantedit.Insteadofreachingformyblade,Ipushedagainsttheheadboard,pressingintohismouth.Onehandreachedforhiswrist,andIpulledhimdeeperinsideme,hisfingerscurling.Thepressurecrested,andwhenIcame,Iwasovercomebytheneedforhiscock.
Thefrustrationdividedme—partofmewantedthis,butIhatedthatpartofmyself.Adrianwasmyenemy,andhismouthhadjustdrivenmetoclimax,amouththattookbloodfromothers.Amonsterwhoonlyhadmebeneathhimnowbecausehe’dthreatenedtogotowarwithmykingdomunlessImarriedhim.
Adriankissedupmybodyoncemore—tonguegliding,teethscraping,andashisfaceleveledwithmine,Ireachedformybladeandshoveditintohisside.
Hesnarled.ItwasasoundIdidn’texpecthimtomake.Hewasquicktorearbackandpluckedthedaggerfromhisflesh.Bloodgushedfromthewound,andhelookedatme,eyesfullofangerandlust.Heturnedhisattentiontothebladeandsnarledagain,tossingitacrosstheroom.Itclatteredasithitthestonefloor.
“Oh,mysweet,youwillregretthat.”
Hegrippedmyface,leaningclose.Iglared,waitingforhisretaliation—forthebitethatwouldendmymortallife.Myattackhaddonenothing.Butinsteadofturningme,heleftthebed.
“Whatareyoudoing?”Iasked,sittingup.
“Ifinditalittlehardtocontinuewhereweleftoff,consideringyoujusttriedtokillme,”hesaid.“I’llwaituntilyou’reravenousoncemore,andifyou’relucky,I’llfuckyouthen.”
Iscoffed.“AsifIwouldaskyoutoreturntomybed.”
Adriandrewhisfingersintohismouth,tastingmycomeashesmirked.“Ithinkyouwill,Sparrow.”
Themoonlightscatteredacrosshisbackasheretreated,andforthefirsttime,Isawraisedweltscrisscrossedoverhisshouldersanddownhisback.Theywerescars,longhealed,atleastoutwardly,andIwonderedwhathorriblethinghe’ddonetoreceivesuchahorrificpunishment.
Iwokeinacoldsweat,thespacebetweenmythighsaching.Isqueezedthemtogetherandthengaveinwithafrustratedcry,partingthemanddrawingmykneesup.IfAdrianwerenear,I’dstabhimagainforthis,forthisunendingachethathaddrivenmetopleasuremyself—andfail—threetimesinthelasttwodays.Iletmyselfcirclemyclitandpartedmyflesh,buttheattempttofindreleasewasinvain.Frustrated,IsatupandfoundAdrianwatchingmefromacrosstheroom.Hesat,reclined,eyesfullofthingsI’dneverseen.Themoonlighthithim—asliveroverhisfaceandhischest.He’dchangedandwasnowwearingwhatlookedlikearobe.Helookedpredatoryandsexual,andIknewIhadtohavehim.
Istoodfromthebedandshedtherobe.HesaidnothingasIapproached.IexpectedhimtoletmedowhatIwished,withthewayhewaslookingatme.ButasImovedtostraddlehim,hecaughtmearoundthewaistandstood.
“Ohno,mysweet,”hesaidandturnedmesomybackwasflushagainsthischest,hisarousalsettledagainstmyass.“Youwillnothavethecontrolhere.”
Histonguetouchedmyjawandthenmyneck,wherehesuckedtheskinintohismouthuntilitstungbeforehepushedmetowardthebed.
Hekeptoneofmyhandssecuredbehindmyback,andtheotherIusedforpurchaseagainstthefootboardwherehebentmeover.Hiskneedippedbetweenmythighs,wideningmystance,asheguidedthecrownofhiscockagainstmyopening.Mybreathescapedinashudderinggasp.
“Canyouhandlethis?”Hiswordswerelacedwithbarelyrestrainedlust,andthoughallhismovementsuptothispointhadbeenrough,hisquestionofferedastrangesortofcomfort.IknewifIsaidno,hewouldreleaseme.
AndIshouldhavesaidno,exceptthatasIspoke,IknewitwasthesurestI’deverbeen.
“Yes.”
ThewordturnedintoagutturalmoanasAdrianfilledmeinonebrutalthrust.Hepausedtoreleasemyarm,onlytoburyhisfingersinmyhair.Withbothmyhandsfree,Igrippedthefootboardashishipsmoved,drivingintome.Thebedknockedagainstthewall.Itwasasoundthatworkedintandemwiththeraggedcriescomingfrommythroat.
“Yes,”Adrianhissed.Hishandtightenedinmyhair,theothermovedtomyneck,andheguidedmesothatmybackwasbowed,myshoulderbladesmeetinghischest.Inthisposition,hecouldnotthrust,buthegroundhishipsintome,elicitinganewsensationthathadeverynerveendinginmybodyonfire.
“Screammyname,Sparrow,sothatyourcommandermayhearhowloudImakeyoucome,”hesaidagainstmyear,andthenhisteethscrapedmyskin,onceagaintrailingapathdownthecolumnofmynecktomyshoulder,wherehelickedandsuckeduntilIwascertainIwouldbruise.
Thiswashisclaimtome,andrightnow,Icouldnotevenhateitbecausethispleasure…itwasexquisite.
Hereleasedme,andIjusthadtimetoreinstatemyholdonthebedbeforehedroveintomeharder.Mybreathescapedmeinastrangesound—agutturalmoanthatcouldonlycommunicatethepressurebuildinginmycore,thetensiontighteningeverymuscle—untilmybodyburst,leavingmeweakandshaken.IdidnotrealizewhatwashappeninguntilAdrianliftedmeintohisarmsandcarriedmeontothebed.
Comparedtotheferocitywithwhichwe’djustcometogether,hismovementsweregentleashesettledmeatopthecovers.Mybodyrelaxed,despitemyenemy’shold.Tooexhaustedtofightortospeak,Ijustheldhisgaze,stillcloudedwithdesireandastrangewarmththatseemedmisplacedgivenwhatithadtakentogettothispoint.
Adrianhoveredoverme,hisfaceinchesfrommine.
“Howareyou?”heasked.
Ididnotknowhowtoanswer.Ifeltlikeatraitortomypeople.
SoIstayedquiet,andAdrianaskedadifferentquestion.
“Areyouhurt?”
Ishookmyhead.
Hestaredatmeamomentlonger.Iexpectedhimtoleavethen,butinstead,hebroughthishandtomyface,hisfingersbrushinglightlyovermycheekbeforehepressedakissbetweenmybreasts,downmystomach,untilhehoveredbetweenmythighs.Fromthatplace,hestaredatmywholebody,asifIweretheonlythinghehadeverwanted—aprizehehaddesperatelysoughtandfinallyclaimed.
ThenIrememberedwhoIhadbetweenmythighs—theBloodKing,aconquerorwhosetruedesirewastobringCordovatoitsknees.
Asmythoughtsturnedunfavorable,hepartedmyfleshandhismouthclosedovermyclit.Hedrewitagainstthetipofhistongue,suckinglightlybeforereleasingtolick.Hefollowedthatpattern,slowandcontrolled,andIlostmygripontheangerandhatredwhileIwrithed.
Icouldnotdecidewheremyhandsshouldgo—overmyheadorinhishair.Myheelscouldnotfindasafeplacetoanchor,slippingonthebeddingthetightermymusclesgrew,andwhenhisfingersspearedmyflesh,Iwantedtoarchoffthebed,butheheldmeinplace,devouring.
Onceagain,IfoundmyselfunabletocontrolthesoundorvolumeofmyvoiceasIfocusedontheillicitsensationofhislongfingerscurlinginsideme,thevibratingpulseofhistongueagainstmyclit.Mybreathcaught,andsuddenlymylungsfroze.Mychestwouldn’theaveaseverypartofmybodytightened.
Icameharderthanbefore,inafitofdesperategaspsandquiveringmuscles,anditwasonlythenthatAdrianreleasedmetoclimbupmybody.Hislipshoveredovermineashespoke.
“Sweet,”hesaidanddippedhistongueintomymouthsoIcouldtastemyself.Iunderstoodthatasmuchasthishadbeenaboutpleasure,itwasmoreaboutpower.Adrianhadprovenmyunrelentingneedforhisbody,andIwonderedwhointhecastlewasbearingwitnesstomyshame,tohowloudhehadmademecome.Ididnotdoubtthatcuriousstaffandevencourtmemberslingereddownthehalllistening,thoughIwascertainthey’dexpectedadifferentoutcome—abeheadedkingratherthanapleasedone.
Myfuryatmyselfandhimwassudden,anditgavemerenewedstrength.Asheshiftedtolieonhisback,Ifollowed,straddlinghim;hisengorgedcocksatbetweenmythighs,stillwetfrommyrelease.
“Youhavenotcome,”Isaid.
Hesmiled.“Thiswasaboutyou.”
“Doyounotbelieveinmyabilitytopleasureyou?”
“Oh,Sparrow.Youdopleaseme.”
“Andyetyourcockisfull,”Ipointedoutandrolledagainsthim.
Adriandrewinabreath,andhisfingersgrippedmythighs.
“Wouldyouliketocome?”Iasked.Icouldtakehimagain,andhewouldcrymynamejustasloud,anevenexchange.
“Iwould,”hesaid,hiseyesboringintomine.
“Where?”Iwhisperedandbenttopressakisstohischest.Itwasintimate,buthehaddonethesametome.“Insideme?Orinmymouth?”
Myquestionwasmetwithsilence,andwhenIlookedatAdrian,hewasstaringatmelikehecouldn’tbelievewhatIjustaskedhim.Butthecornerofhismouthlifted,andheanswered,“Takemeintoyourmouth.”
Ishiftedoffhimandtookhishands,guidinghimintoaseatedpositionattheedgeofthebedbeforekneelingbetweenhisthighs.Iwatchedhimasmyfingersclosedaroundhishardlength,applyingpressurefromthebaseofhisshafttothecrown,wheremythumblingered,teasingandmassagingashiscomebeadedatthetip.
“Whatdoyoulike?”Iasked,myvoicebreathy.
“Showmewhatyouarecapableof,Sparrow.”
SoItastedhim,lickinghimashehaddoneme,beforemymouthclosedoverhiscock.Hegroaned,andhishandsthreadedthroughmyhair.Ilethim,whileIalternatedbetweenswirlingmytongueoverhislengthandballsandpressingkissestohisthighs.ThenIpulledawaytowetmypalmswithasmuchsalivaasIcouldmanagebeforewrappingbothmyhandsaroundthebaseofhiscock.AsIstrokedhim,Ipaidattentiontothehead,lavishingitwithmytongueandhollowingmycheeks.ItwasagiveandtakethatleftAdriangroaningandhishandstighteninginmyhair,fingersscrapingmyscalp.Themusclesofhislegsbulgedagainstmybody.
“Fuck!”Adrian’scursewasahiss,andIlookeduptofindhisheadthrownback,histhroatworking,hisbreathsraggedandquick.Thenhiseyesreturnedtomineashegrittedout,“Yes.”
Iheldhisgaze,willinghimtothinkofthismoment,toneverforgetit.Fromthisdayforward,hewouldneverberidofme.Hewouldneverescapetheneedthathadplaguedmesinceourencounterinthewoods.Iwouldhaunthim,fillinghiscockuntilhewasreadytoburstwithnooutletsavemybody.
Thethoughtmademesmilearoundhislength,andImoaned,closingmyeyes.Ididn’tthinkitwaspossibleforhishandstogripmetighter,buttheydid,andmyeyeswateredathishold,butIcontinueduntilhereleasedintomymouth.AsIswallowed,Irosetomyfeetandgrippedhisface,bringingmylipstohis,partinghismouthwithmytongue.Hetastedmehungrily,handsguidingmetostraddlehimonceagain.
WhenIdrewback,IstaredintotheBloodKing’seyes—myhusbandandenemy.
“IknewIlikedyourmouth,”hesaid,histhumbbrushingovermybottomlip.Ibitdownhard,andhechuckledbeforetwistingandpinningmetothebedoncemore.AsIstaredupathishungryeyes,mylegsparted,welcomingwhateverhewouldbring,becauseasmuchaswewerefightingfordominance,he’dgivenmetheonethingI’dbeensearchingfor
Pleasure.Seven
Iwoketomovement,lyingonmystomachinthebedI’dsharedwithAdrian.Peelingmyeyesopen,Ifoundthedooropenasmaidshauledsteamingpailsofwatertothemetaltub.Ishiftedontomybackandsatup,holdingtheblanketstomychest.Mybodywassoreandsticky,andIwasprettysureI’donlyfallenasleepanhourago.
IfoundAdrianstandingbythewindow,staringoutatthenight.Hewasfullydressedandindifferentclothesthanthosehe’dwornatthewedding.Thesewerenotasfineaswhathe’dwornlastnight,buttheyweretravelclothes.Still,helookedeverybittheruler,cladinblackandcrimson.Heworenoornamentation,buthedidnotneedit.Hispresencespokeofhispower.
Howwashefunctioningafterthenightwe’dhadtogether?
Atthatthought,helookedatmeoverhisshoulder.
“Idonotneedasmuchsleepasyoutofeelrecovered,”hesaid.
“Thathardlyseemsfair.”
Heturnedfullytowardme,andtherewasamomentwhenallIcouldthinkaboutwashowhisskinhadfeltagainstmine,howhisbodyhadmovedinsidemine,howdesperateI’dbeentocomeandmakehimcome.Tendrilsofdesirecurledinsidemybody,flushingmyskin.
Imayhavebornehismarks,buthisbodyalsoboremine—andthatwaswhereIwastorn.AsmuchasI’dmetmymatchinpleasure,itwasthroughmyenemy’sbody.
“Iknowwhatyouthinkofmykind,”hesaid,andtherewasaglimmerofamusementbeforehisexpressionturnedmoreserious.“Butthereismoretousthanthemonstrousparts.”
“Areyoutryingtosuggestyouhaveredeemingqualitiesasamurderer?”
“Whynotaskyourfatherthatquestion?”Adriansaid.
“Myfatherisnotamurderer.Hehasfoughtbravelytodefendhiskingdom.”
“Soitisonlymurderwhenyourpeoplearekilled?”Adrianasked.
Iglaredathim.“Youwerecreatedtocurseus.”
Adrianstared,andIcouldnottellhowhefeltaboutmycomment.Butafterabriefpause,helickedhislipsandanswered,“Well,Icannotarguewiththat.”
ThevampirekingcrossedtheroomtothechairbesidethefirewhereI’dfoundhimsittinglastnightbeforeourcouplingbegan.Heretrievedafur-linedcloakandclaspeditaroundhisshoulders.
“Bathe,”hesaid.“Youwillnothavethechanceforthenextweek.”
Iglaredathimbutrose,wantingtowashallevidenceofhisclaimtomefrommybody.Atmythought,hechuckled.
“Thatisnotpossible.”
Ireachedfortheclosestobject,whichhappenedtobeaheavybrasscandlestick,andlauncheditathim.Itsoaredpasthimandhitthewall,damagingapaintingthathungjustbehindhishead.
“Stopreadingmymind!”Isnapped.
“Thatislikeaskingyoutostopfeeling,”hesaid.
Isighed,frustrated.“Ihateyou.”
“Youhatepartsofme,”hesaid.
“Ihateallofyou,”Isaid.Iletmyeyesshiftdown,buthewasfullydressed,anditwasimpossibletotellifhewasaroused.
“ThenwhyareyouwonderingifIamaroused?”heasked.
“BecauseIwonderifyougetoffonarguing,”Isaid.
“Yes,”hesaid.“Toanswerboth.”
Iscowled.“Stopreadingmymind.”
Hechuckled,andIturnedonmyheels,hipsswayingasIheadedforthecopperbath.Ihopedhiscockgrewtightandhisballsheavywithneed.
Thewatersteamed,makingmyfacesweatasIneared.Isankintoit,groaningasAdrianapproached,swipingafewitemsoffanearbytable.
“Soap?”heasked.
Imethisstrangeeyesfirst,thenletmygazefalltohishand,hesitant,wonderingifitwassomekindoftrick.
“YoucancallforNadia,”Isaid.
“Ididnotthinkyouwouldwanthertoseeyoulikethis,”hereplied.
Iknewwhathemeant.Ilookeddownatmybreasts,myskincoveredindarkbruisesfromAdrian’shungrymouth.ItwasbadenoughthattheBloodKinglived,worsethatIhadlethimtouchme,enterme,destroyme—andheknewthat.Exceptthatinsteadofforcingmetofacemypeopleinastatethatwouldexposemetoshame,hewasprotectingmefromit.
Itookthesoapandthewashclothheofferednext.
“Thankyou.”
Heinclinedhisheadbeforeturninghisbackandwalkingtowardthewindowagain
“WewilldepartforRevekkatonight?”
“Yes.”
“IfyouintendtoconquertherestofCordova,whynotleavemehereuntilyourconquestiscomplete?”
“No.”
“SoyouwillleavemeinRevekkawhileyouconquermycountry?”
“IwillreturntoRevekkawithyouandremainuntilyouareestablishedasmyqueen.”
“YouwouldrisktheNineHousesplottingagainstyouinyourabsence?”
“TheHousescanplotalltheywant.Iaminevitable.”
Hewasn’tafraid.Hebelievedhewastrulyuntouchable.
Andhewas—asfarasanyoneknew.I’dstabbedhimintheside,andhe’dhealedimmediately.Myfathermusthavebelievedsotoo,whichwaswhyIwasnowmarriedtothekingofRevekka.
Istaredathim.“Andwhatdoesitmeantobeestablishedasyourqueen?”
Itwastheonlyquestionthatmatteredtomenow.
“Mypeoplemustrespectyou,”hesaid.“Buttheyarepredatorsandyou…youareasparrow.”
“Areyoucallingmeweak?”
Thethoughthadmesqueezingthewashcloth,andwhenhelookedatme,hisgazewasbothgentleandoddlyproud.
“Webothknowyouarenotweak,”hesaid.“ButnotevenyoucansurvivetheRedPalacewithoutsomeonetoteachyouourways.”
I’dneverthoughtmuchaboutthewaysofvampires,butnowIwondered—whatwastheirculture?Weretheyasbarbaricwithoneanotherastheyweretomykind?
Adriancertainlymadeitseemso.
Therewasaknock,andbothourheadssnappedtowardthedoor.Beforeeitherofuscouldspeak,Nadiaentered,cradlingtowels.Shepaused,staringdownatsomethingbeforebendingtopickuptheknifeI’dusedtostabAdrianlastnight.Shehelditbythepommel,betweenherthumbandforefinger,thebladecrustedwithAdrian’sblood.
“Goodmorning,Nadia,”Isaid,foldingmykneestomychest,asifIcouldhidethebruisingonmyskin.
Hergazeshiftedfromtheknifetome,thentoAdrian,andIknewshewastryingtofigureouthowithadgottenthereandhowbothAdrian—andI—werestillunharmed.Afteramoment,sheseemedtocomeoutofhershockandspoke.
“Issi,”shesaid.“Goodmorning.”Shecrossedtothebed,whereshesetthedaggeronthenightstand.“Ibroughtfreshtowelsandyourtravelclothes,”shesaid,drapingthemonthebenchattheendofthebed.“ShallIhelpyoudress?”
Iopenedmymouthbuthesitated.MygazeshiftedtoAdrian.IhatedthatIlookedtohimforguidance.Afteramoment,heofferedasmallnod.
“Weleaveinanhour,”hesaid.“Youwillwanttosayyourgoodbyesbeforethen.”
Adrian’sbootsthuddedagainstthefloorasheheadedforthedoor.NadiaandIstaredateachotheruntilitclickedshutandwewerealone.
“Issi.”Nadia’shandsfelltohersides.“Areyouwell?”
“I’mfine,Nadia,”Isaidquicklyandreturnedtoscrubbingmyskinandmyhair.
“Letmehelp,”sheoffered,andIsankbeneaththewater,holdingmybreathuntilmylungshurt.WhenIsurfacedagain,Irosetomyfeetandsteppedoutofthetub,facingmymaid.
Shestared,hermouthhangingopen.
“Issi,”shebreathed.
“Bearwitnesstomyshame,Nadia,”Isaid.“Icouldnotkillhim.”
AndIlethimfuckme.
Nadiaseemedtoovercomehershockenoughtoreachforatowelandfoldmeintoitasshebroughtmeinforatighthug.Iletherholdme,becausethiswouldprobablybethelasttimeIsawher.Shepulledback,andIheldontothetowelasshecradledmyface.
“Didhehurtyou?”
“No.”
Itwasthetruth.Hehadbeenrough,brutaleven,butitwasnothingIhadnotwillinglyaccepted.
“Do…you…favorhim?”
“What?No,”Isaid,butasIrejectedherinquiry,hereyesdriftedtomyneckandshoulders.Isighedandpushedpasther,reachingfortheclothesshe’dbroughtme.
“Youcannotblamemeforasking,Issi.Youlethim—”
“Fuckme,”Iinterrupted.“Itdoesn’tmeananything,Nadia.”
Sheglared.“ItdoeswhereI’mfrom.”
“Ithasnothingtodowithwhereyouarefrom.YouarewellawareI’vehadotherlovers.ItisonlybecauseitisAdrianthatyouareappalled.”
“Adrian?You’recallinghimbyhisgivenname?”
Ishovedmyfeetintheleatherleggingsandpulledonthebluetunicshebrought.
“Didyoueventrytokillhim?”Nadiaasked.
Ileanedtowardher,shovingmyhandtowardthetable.“Didyounotseethebloodyknife?”
“Howmanytimesdidyoustabhim?”
“Itdoesn’tmatter,”Isnapped.“Becauseyouknowwhathappenedwithinsecondsofstabbinghim?Hehealed.”
Notevenascarremained,whichmeantthatthescarsonhisbackandtheoneonhisfaceweretherebeforehebecameimmortal.
Nadialookedalittleshakenbythenews.Still,shesaid,“Ineverknewyoutogiveupsoeasily.”
“Giveup?”
“WillyourfirstattemptatassassinatingtheBloodKingbeyourlast?”
Istaredather.“HaveyouheardnothingIsaid?Hecannotbekilled,Nadia.”
“Everythingdies,Isolde.”Shecrossedtheroomandretrievedtheknifefromthebedsidetablebeforeapproachingmeagain.“Youcouldbethesaviorofyourpeople,ofthewholecountry,andwhenyouhaveconqueredhim,youcancomebacktoLarawhereyoubelong.”
Mychestachedalready,andmyeyesstung.BacktoLara.Ihadn’tevenleftyet,andIwasalreadydesperateforhome.
“Thisisanopportunity,Issi,”Nadiasaidandplacedtheknifeinmyhand.“TheBloodKinghasaweakness,andyoumustfindit.”
Nadialeftafterherlecture,andIfinishedgettingready.Iarrangedmyweapons,securingmyretractablebladesatmywrists.Thebladesthemselvesweren’tlong,andtheyhadsatagainstmyskinsolong,nothavingthemfeltwrong.IalsocleanedtheknifeNadiagaveme,washingawayAdrian’sblood,thoughafterward,IthoughtperhapsIshouldhavekeptitasproofthatI’datleasttriedtomurderhim.WhenIwasfinished,Isheathedtheknifeatmywaist.ThelastitemIlayeredwasacowl-neckcloak;itwaspracticalfortheicynightsbuthidmyshameasIlefttheroomthatborewitnesstomytreason.
Iwasstillangrybecauseevennow,Iwantedhim,becauselastnightIcouldn’tstopmyselffromtouchinghim,becauseIhadtakeneverychancetoridehiscockandlethimcomeinsideme.Hesworeitwasn’tmagicthathadmeinhishold,andIbelievedhim.Lastnight,IhadbeenclaimedinwaysI’dneverbeenbefore,andIhadactedinwaysI’donlyeverdreamed,buttherewassomethingaboutAdrianthatmademefeelIcouldbepassionate,rough,erotic—withoutrestraint.
AndsoIhad.
Wherevermydesirecamefrom,itwasprimal,andhematchedit.
Thegoddesseswerecruel.
Ifoundmyfatherinthegreathallwheremynightmarehadbegun.Today,itlookedmuchdifferent,withwoodentablesarrangedinalargerectangle,thebenchescrowdedwithcourtiers,botheagertopleasemyfatherandwitnessmyfate.KingHenrisatelevatedbehindasimilartable,besidehimCommanderKillian,whosegazeIavoided.Exceptheprovedtobetheleastofmyworries,becauseasIentered,silencedescended,andsodidmyembarrassment.
TherewasnohidinghowI’dspentmynight.Myfatherhadknownhe’dsentmeofftoconsummateamarriage,andsodidthekingdom,despitemyunionbeingaquiet,lacklusteraffair.They’dexpectedtowakethismorninganddiscoverIhadkilledtheBloodKing.Hadmyfatherthoughtthesame?
ImademywaytowardhimwhenIwashaltedbyMarigold,thedaughterofLadyCrinaEder.MarigoldlikedtostayatcourtratherthanherhomeprovinceofBelice,andshe’dtriedtobecomemyfriend,butshedidnotlikewhatIliked.Onedayinmyshadow,traversingthewoodtoexplore,andshehadgivenup.I’dunderstoodthenthatshe’dexpectedsomethingverydifferentfromafriendshipwithme—daysatcourtinprettydressesandsilkshoes,onlywalkingalongthewornpathsoftheroyalgardensandtradingpalacesecrets.
ButIwasnotthatkindofprincess,andtoday,Iwasnotthatkindofqueen.
“PrincessIsolde,”shesaidandcurtsied,wearingadressmadeofscarletwool.Thisparticularfabrichadbeendyedadeeppurple,whichcontrastedwithhervibrantgreeneyesandyellowcurls.
Iconsideredcorrectingheraddressbutdeclined.IwasfinewithbeingIsolde,princessofLara,anotherday.
“Ididnothaveachancetoseeyouyesterdayafterthe…arrangementwasmade.Iwantedtoexpressmycondolences.”
Hervoiceechoedinthehall,notbecauseshewasspeakingloudlybutbecauseeveryonewasstillquiet,watchingourexchange.
“Yourcondolences?”Irepeated.
IknewmarriagetotheBloodKingwasnotideal,butIwishedeveryonewouldstoptreatingthisasifitweremyfuneral.
“Youmustbedevastated,”shecontinued.
IimaginedthateveryoneinLarathoughttheycouldguesshowIwasfeeling.TheyonlyhadtoconsidertheirhatredforAdriantorelate,buttherewassomethingaboutbeinginthisroomonthefirstdayofmymarriagetothevampireking,beneaththejudgingeyesofmypeople,thatmademewanttospeakonmycourage.
“Iamnotdead,LadyMarigold,”Isaid.
Shehesitated.
“Imaynothavehadachoiceinmypartner,butIhaveachoiceastohowImoveforward,andyoucanbecertainIwillusethatpowertomypeople’sadvantage,soperhapsyoushouldbecongratulatingyourqueen.”
Marigold’scheeksturnedpink,andshestammered,“Ofcourse.Iapologize,QueenIsolde.”
Shebrushedpastmeandheadedfortheexit.Icontinuedtowardthedaisandcurtsied.
“Goodevening,Father,”Isaidquietlyandtookmyseatbesidehim.Thefoodlaidoutatthecenterofourtablewastraditionalfare—cheeses,driedmeats,andvegetables.Therewerealsotankardsofwineandmead.Itookinthesightandthesmells,knowingthatthiswasmylastnightoffamiliarfoodanddrink.
Mylasthourathome.
Aftermysend-off,myfatherandhiskingdomwouldretiretobedandperhapsbelessfearfulofthenight.
“Isolde,”myfathersaid.“Areyouwell?”
“Iam.”
Ikeptmyeyesonmyemptyplate,mycheeksflaming.Icouldnotbringmyselftoreachforfood.Therewassilenceagain,andthenKillianspoke.“Eat.Youmustbehungry,”hesaid.Iliftedmygaze.Hecouldhavestoppedthen,butheadded,“Youbarelyslept.”
ItwashiswayoftellingmeheknewhowI’dspentthenight,andhisjealousywasapparent.
Inarrowedmyeyes.“IwilleatwhenIamhungry,Killian.Asitstands,Iamrathersated.”
Hiseyesflashed,amarkofhissurpriseandshockatmyopenchallenge.Thecommandersethisforkdown,andIexpectedhimtopounce,toexposesomepartofmylifetotheentireroom,butmyfatherintervened,settinghisownutensilsdownandpushingawayfromthetable.Ashestood,sodidthewholeroom.
“Come,Isolde,”hesaidquietly.ItwashistonethattoldmeIwasn’tintrouble,andyetmyheartracedatfacinghimalone.Still,Iroseandfollowedhimintotheadjoininganteroomwherewe’dwaitedyesterdayforAdriantoarrive.Onceinside,Iturnedtohim.
“Father—”
BeforeIcouldfinishspeaking,hehuggedmetightly.Isaidnothing.AssoonasIfelttheweightofhisarmsaroundme,Iburstintotears.
“Ihavedisappointedyou,”Isobbed.
“Youcouldneverdisappointme.”
Iwascertainifheknewtheextentofmytruth,hewoulddisagree.Instead,heclaspedmyshouldersanddrewmeaway.Oureyesmet,andhetouchedmychin.
“Feelnoshame,Isolde,”hesaid.“Youarebutavictimhere.”
Avictim.
Ihatedtheword.IwasalsoprincessofLaraandnowaqueen,thoughIdidnotcompletelyunderstandwhatIruled—anationofmonsters,acountryofmyconqueredpeople?Still,therewaspowerintheruinsofthelifeIwasabouttoleavebehind.Irefusedtofallundertheweightofthesecircumstances,notwhenIhadsomuchatmyfingertips.
Wedidnotreturntothegreathall.Instead,wemadeourwayoutside,intothecoldevening,andfollowedthestonepaththatcutthroughmymother’sgarden.Thegardenershadlitlanterns,andtheflamescastdancinglightalongourpath.Ikeptmyarmloopedthroughmyfather’s,passingbarrenplotsandleaflesstrees,ourbreathsfrostingaswespoke.
“Itriedtokillhim,”Isaid,andmyfather’sstepsslowed.“Iknewvampireswerehardtokill,butIdidnotthinkitwasimpossible.Adrian,though,isimpossibletokill.”
“PerhapsitisnotAdrianwhomustdie,”myfathersaidatlength.
Mybrowsfurrowed.Ididnotunderstand.“Whatdoyoumean?”
“ThereisagreaterevilthantheBloodKing,Issi,”myfathersaid.“Anditisthepowerthatcreatedhim.”
“Youmeanmagic?”
Henodded.
Overtwohundredyearsago,beforetheNineHousesunited,Cordova’scountrieswereadvisedbywitches,womenwhowereinitiallythoughttobeblessedwiththeabilitytoharnessmagic,untiltheyturnedupontheirkings.Fortheirtreason,theywereburnedatthestakeinaneventknownastheBurning.Itwassaidthatintheaftermath,Dis,thegoddessresponsibleforwitchesandtheirmagic,cursedCordovawithaplagueofmortalfears.Shortlyafter,vampiresmanifestedfromthedarknessand,withthem,othermonsters.
“IfAdrianisacurse…cancursesnotbebroken?”
Myfather’sgazeleveledwithmyown.“Onlythekinghimselfknows,”hereplied.
Itwasmyfather’swayoftellingmetofindout.Heturnedandpickedoneofmymother’smidnightroses,remindingmeonceagain,“Youarethehopeofourkingdom.”
Hewasgivingmeamission—oneIacceptedasItooktherose.
Wecontinuedthroughthegarden,andwhenwereturnedtothecastle,Adrianwaitedwiththesamedark-hairedvampirewhohadbeenpresentatourwedding.
“Myqueen,”Adriansaidasheliftedhishandtohisheartandbowedhishead.“Allowmetointroducemygeneral,DarocZbirak.”
Asmygazeshiftedtohim,thegeneralbowed,thoughIgotthesensehedidsobegrudgingly—whichwasfinewithme,becauseIdidthesame.
“General,”Isaid,incliningmyhead,bitingmytonguesoIdidnotsaythethingsItrulywished.Soyouarethemanresponsibleforthefire,thedestruction,thedeathinCordova.Still,Iletthosethoughtscyclethroughmymind,hopingmyemotionswerehighenoughforAdriantohearthem.ThenIwonderedifDarocpossessedthesameabilitiesasAdrian.
“Darochasarrangedyourescort,”Adriansaid.
“Ihaveappointedmybestsoldiersasyourguards,myqueen,”Darocsaid.“TheyhavebeeninstructedtorideoutsideyourcarriageduringourjourneytoRevekka.”
“Carriagesaretargets,”Isaid.“Iwillnotrideinone.”
Therewasabeatofsilence,andIlookedfromDaroctoAdrian.Neitherofthemblinked.Icouldnottelliftheyweresurprisedbymyresponseorirritated.
“Ourjourneywillbelong,myqueen,”Adriansaid.
“IamaprincessbornofLara,”Isaid.“Icanrideforhours.”
Heliftedasinglebrow,andthecornersofhislipsfollowed.“Verywell.Weshallfindyouahorse.”
AdrianlookedtoDaroc,whobowedandleft,presumablytofindmyhorse.
Therewasastrainedsilencethatfollowedhisdeparture.Icouldnothelpfeelingcompletelyawkwardinthepresenceofmynewhusbandandmyfather,andIwasrelievedwhenAdrianspoke.“YouarewelcomeattheRedPalaceintwoweeks’time,”hesaidtomyfather,“whenIsolde’sascenttoqueenismadeofficial.Iwillsendanescorttoensureyoursafepassageintomylands.”
“Thatisgenerousofyou,KingAdrian,”myfatherreplied,histonewaveringtowardsarcasm.“Iwelcomeanychancetolookuponmydaughteragain.”
Somethingthickgatheredinmythroat,andIwonderedwhoIwouldbecomeinthattime?Wouldmyfatherevenrecognizeme?WouldIrecognizemyself?
“Issiismygreatesttreasure,”myfatheradded,andwhileIlookedathim,hekepthiseyesuponAdrian.“Itrustyouwillplacehersafetyaboveyourown.”
Itwasthesecondtimehe’daskedAdriantoensuremywell-being.Itwasalittleironicgiventhatmyfathercoulddonothingagainstthevampirekingifhedecidedtoharmme,savegotowar.
“Withoutasecondthought,”Adrianreplied.“Sheismywife.”
Thosewordswerelikeastriketomychest.Theyshouldhavesoundedfalse,buttheydidn’t.Istaredathim,halfindisbelief.Ididnotexpecthimtorespectourmarriagevowssofully,especiallywhenIwasstillplottingwaystomurderhim.
ThethoughtbroughtasmiletoAdrian’slips,andIscowled.Iwouldhavetofigureoutwhattriggeredhismindreadingorawaytoveilmythoughts.Wasthatpossiblewithoutmagic?
“Itistime,Isolde,”Adriansaid.
Upuntilthispoint,IthoughtIcouldhandleleavingmyfather,butsuddenlyIwasfacedwiththereality,andithitmesohard,itstolemybreath.Mythroatclosedup,andmyeyesburnedasIfacedhim.
“Iwillseeyousoon,Issi,”Fathersaidandkissedmyforehead.Iclosedmyeyesagainsthisaffection,wantingtomemorizethismoment.ItfeltasifitwouldbethelasttimeIinhaledhisscent,feltthewarmthofhistouch,heardthesoundofhislow,ruggedvoice.
Iswallowedthickly.
“Iloveyou,”Iwhisperedthroughlipsthatquivered.
“Iloveyou,”hereplied,andItuckedthosewordsintomyheart,spokensosoftlyandsorarely,asIheldhiscallousedhandsforwhatfeltlikeforever.Slowly,Iletmyfingersleavehis,immediatelywishingIcouldreturntohissideevenasIbackedaway.IturnedandfacedAdrian,whosestarewascuriousandremorseful,andtookhisoutstretchedhand.Hesaidnothingaswewalkedsidebyside,exitingthecastleattheveryfrontwhereacrowdhadgatheredbeneaththenightskytowatchmydeparture—amixofguestsfromHighCityandcourtiers.
Onceagain,Icouldnothelpfeelingthatthiseventshouldbefilledwithmorecelebration,andifIhadbecomeaqueentoanyotherking,thatwouldbethecase.Instead,mypeoplelookedoninfear,disappointment,andhorror.
MyfatherfollowedandstoodatopthestepsasIdescendedthem,onlytomeetNadiaatthebottom.Hereyeswereswollenandredfromcrying,andshedabbedatherfacewithawhitekerchief.
“Deargirl,”shesaidanddrewmeintoherarms.Ihadmanagedtokeepacaponmyemotionsuntilthatmoment,whenacryburstoutofme.Itwasonlyforamoment—astrangledsobthatIgrabbedontoandshoveddeepdownasNadiawhisperedagainstmyear,“RememberwhatItoldyou.”
Thenshekissedmyhairandreleasedme.
Imovedonfromher,turningtowardAdrian,whowaitedpatientlybesidetwohorses.Bothweregorgeoussteedswithshiny,blackcoats.IapproachedtheoneAdrianstoodnearandstrokedhisnose.
“TheirnamesareMidnightandShadow,”hesaid.“Shadowismine.”
“AndwhodidMidnightbelongto?”Iasked.AdrianhadnotplannedonreturningtoRevekka,leastofallwithabride.Anextrahorseusuallymeantadeath.Thequestionwas,haditbeenavampireoramortal?
Adriandidnotanswerbutinsteadsaid,“Come.Wemustdepart.”
ItookthereinsfromAdrianandgrabbedatuftofmanewiththesamehand.Withmyother,Igraspedthecantleofthesaddleandplacedmyfootinthestirrup,pushingoffthegroundasIswungmylegover.OnceIwassettled,IstareddownatAdrian.
“WhatplacedoItakeinline?”Iasked.
“Youridebesideme,”hesaid.“Itiswhereyouwillbesafest.”
Mybrowsdrewtogether.“Iamsafewithmypeople.”
“PerhapsyouwereasprincessofLara,”hesaid.“Buttoday,youarequeenofRevekka.”Heleftmysideandthenmountedhisownsteed.“Wewillrideuntilsunup,”hesaid.
Daroc,whoappearedtobetheonlyvampirewhohadaccompaniedAdrianintothecity,rodeaheadofus,andaswefellintostepbehindhim,Ilookedovermyshoulderonelasttimeatmyfather,whostoodwreathedinthelanternlightatthefrontofCastleFiora,poisedandregalandalone.Eight
Whenbridesdepartedwiththeirnewhusbands,peoplegatheredtooffergifts—smallthingslikeflowers,polishedstones,andgoldandsilvercoins.
Forme,therewasnothing,notevenacrowdgatheredwithinHighCity,thoughwhenIturnedmyheadfromlefttoright,Isawpeoplepeeringthroughwindowsandfrombehindtheirdoors.Theywerecuriousbutafraid—bothofthedarkandofAdrian.
WecametothegatewhereNicolaewasondutywithanotherguardIdidnotrecognize.IstartedtosmileathimasIpassed,becausethatwaswhatNicolaeusuallydidwhenhespottedme.Thistime,hefrownedandcastadarklookatbothDarocandAdrian,thenme.Hisexpressionhitmeinthechest,andIquicklylookedaway,knowingthathedidnotunderstand.He,likemypeople,didnotknowwhyAdrianstilllivedwhenIhadgottensoclose.
AsIpassed,IheardNicolaesaysomethingunderhisbreath,andIpulledonmyreins,haltingMidnight.
“Doyouhavesomethingtoshare,Nicolae?”
Theguardstaredatme,andthenhisgazeflickeredtohisleft,whereDarocandAdrianlingered.
“No,YourMajesty,”hesaidandbowedhishead.
“Iwouldhatetothinkthatyouwoulddisrespectme,”Isaid.“BecausethatwouldmeanIwouldhavetodismissyou.”
Hiseyesconnectedwithmine,hisjawclenched.
“Withallduerespect,Princess,IambeholdentothekingofLara.”
Iwentrigid,andafterabriefpause,Islidoffmyhorsetostandface-to-facewithNicolae.
“It’sQueentoyou,”Isaid,andthenIsmiled.“Enjoyyourlastnightonguard,solider.IwillbesuretosendCommanderKilliannoticeofyourimmediatedismissal.”
Iturnedfromhimthen,mountedmyhorse,andguidedhimpastDarocandAdrian.Thetwolookedatmebutsaidnothingastheyfollowedmeintothetreeline.Oncewewereinthewoods,Islowedmypace,unsureofwhereweweregoing.Adrianhadbroughtawholearmytoourborder.Wherewerethey?
“Partofthearmyhascontinuedontooccupyotherterritories,”Adrianresponded,andIwonderedwhathemeantbyotherterritories.WouldhecontinuetoTheanext?“Asmallpartywaitsforusjustoutsidethecapitoltoaccompanyushome.”
“Revekkawillneverbemyhome,”Isaid.
Adrianremainedquiet.
Wecontinuedtowherethevampireswaited,inasmallclearingnotfarfromHighCity.OnlyafewremainedofAdrian’sarmy,allmounteduponhorses,coveredinarmor.IrecognizedonlySorin,Isac,andMiha.
IwatchedSorinelbowIsac.
“Look,it’sourqueen—theonewhostabbedyou!”
MihagrinnedandIsacglared.“YousaythatasifI’veforgotten.”
“Ithinkyoudonotappreciatethegesture.Whoelsecansaytheywerestabbedbytheirqueen?”
“Yourking,”Isaid,andthetrioexchangedbothsurprisedandamusedlooks.
Besideme,IfeltAdrian’seyesonme.“Ihavemetmymatch,”hesaid.
Hiscommentmademeshiver,andImethisgaze,whichseemedfartooserious.Iwasn’tsureAdrianandIwereamatchforanythingbuthatred,thoughIalsowasn’tsurehehatedmeatall.
“Wetraveluntildawn,”Adrianinstructed,andasDarocrodeforward,AdrianandIfollowedwhileSorin,Isac,andMihafellinlinebehindus.After,therestofthegroupjoined,whichincludedseveralvampiresdressedinthesamefeathered,goldarmorandmortals,bothmenandwomen,whoweredressedinregalsilkandfur,asiftheywerenotpartofanarmy.
WewouldtravelnorththroughLaratotheborderofRevekka.IhadnotventurednorthsinceIwasalittlegirl.Thoseterritorieswerebeyondthemountainpass,tooclosetoRevekka,andasAdrian’spowerhadgrownandnewmonsterswereborn,thevisitsstopped.Now,onlyKillianandhissoldiersmaderoundsclosetotheborderneartheBloodKing’skingdom.
Despitebeingwithmonsters,Iwasexcitedtoseethevillagesinthenorth.Theyweresofarfromthecastle,theyhadtheirowntraditionsandcultures,butIwondered…wouldtheywelcomeme?
Thewoodwasdark,butthenakedlimbsofthetreesallowedforaviewofthestars,andIfoundmyselfwatchingthem,seekinglight,mourningthatIwouldnotseethesunforafewdays.
“Doyoumissthesun?”IaskedAdrian.
“Thatisacuriousquestion.”Heglancedatme.
“Andwhyisthat?”
Hewasquietforamoment,andwhenhespoke,heansweredmyfirstquestion,“Idonotmissthesun,notanymore.”
“AndwhatifImissthesun?”
HowbrightwastheskyinRevekka—whatwouldthesunlooklikebeamingfrombehindredclouds?WouldIevenbeabletoseeit?
“ThenIwillfinditforyou,”hereplied.
Oureyeslocked,andIsawahumansincerityinhisexpressionthatmademychestandcheeksfeelwarm.Iquicklylookedaway.
SilencestretcheduntilInoticedafewofAdrian’ssoldiersbreakingranks,disappearingintothedarkness.Myheartpickeduppace,wonderingwhattheyweredoing.
“Theyarescouting,”Adriansaid.
“ButwearestillinLara.”
Ididn’tseetheneedtobeonguard.AdrianandIhadmadeanagreement,andnomatterhowangrymypeoplewereaboutthearrangement,theywouldhonormyfather.
“Domonstersnotlurkinyourshadows?”heasked.Hewasreferringtothingsthatlurkinthedark—thestrzyga,thevirika,revenants,theker—allcreaturesthatwerelikeAdrianbutdifferentinhowtheyappearedandthewaytheyfeduponlife.
“Areyounottheirking?”Iretorted,frustratedbyhissarcasm.
“Iamthekingofvampires,”hesaid.“Iamnotthekingofmonsters.”
“Thereisnodifference,”Isaid.
IdidnotknowAdrianverywell,butIcouldtellmycommentfrustratedhim.Thatshapelyjawtightened,andIfelttriumphant.I’dlearnedthatthetruemeasureofmenwashowtheyhandledtheiranger.WouldhebelikeKillianandlashoutifIpushedtoohard?
“YouseemtobelieveIspawnedalldarkthings,”hesaid,hisvoicemaintainingthatsilkyquality,andhedeliveredhiswordswithnohintoffrustration.
Itwaswhatweweretold—thatalldarkthingscamefromtheBloodKing.Thatwhenhepartookofsacredlife,thebloodthatdroppedtotheearthcreatedmonsters.
Besideme,helaughed.“Thatisalie.”
“Enlightenme,YourMajesty,”Isaid.
“Iturnhumansintovampires,”hesaid.“ButevenIhaverules.Themonstersyouknowof—thestrzyga,thevirika,revenants,theker—theywerecreatedbyAsha.”
“No,”Isaidimmediately.“Thegoddessoflifewouldnevercorruptit.”
Iwasnotaworshipperofthegoddesses,butevenIdidnotthinkAshawouldcreatesuchheinouscreatures.
“Neverforget,myqueen,thatgoddessesarejusthumanswithgreatpower.”
Withhiscomment,hemovedaheadtoDaroc’ssideasifhenolongerwishedtoridebesideme.Iwatchedhim,wishingthatIcouldpitchanarrowintohisback,butIconsideredwhathesaidaboutthegoddessesandfoundthatIdidnotthinksodifferently.Thereweremanyotherswhosufferedworseattacks,worseexperiences,andyetwerefarmoredevout.Theyworetheirhardshipslikebadgesofhonorandtheirfaithlikeweapons,andIdidnotunderstandit.
IglancedtomyleftasSorinmeanderedupbesidemeandextendedhishand,apieceofdried…somethingclutchedbetweenhisfingers.
“Whatisthat?”Iasked,eyeingitsuspiciously.
“Beef,”hesaidwithagrin.“Youwantsome?”
“Whyareyoueatingbeef?Canyoueatbeef?”
Ionlyknewvampirestosustainthemselveswithblood.IwonderedhowlongitwouldbebeforeIwitnessedavampirefeedfromamortal,andwasnotlookingforwardtothedisplay.
“Themortalsseemtoloveit,”hesaid,andthenhesniffed.“AndIcaneatanythingIwant.”
“He’llthrowituplater,”saidIsacfrombehindus.
“It’sdisgusting,”Mihaadded.“Buthekeepsdoingit.”
“Letmelivemylife,”Sorinsnapped,glaringatthem.Itriedhardnottosmilebutfailed.WhenSorinlookedbackatme,hewiggledthebeefstickinmyface.“Takeit.Iknowyou’rehungry.Icanhearit.”
Iraisedabrow.“IsthatanotherpowerIshouldknowabout?Superiorhearing?”
“I’dsayyesbuteventhemortalsatthebackofthelinecanhearyourstomachgrowling.”
Ifrowned.Iwashungry,andIhadn’tbeenabletobringmyselftoeatdinnerthisevening,soItookthedriedbeefandtoreapieceoff,chewingvigorously.Themeatwashardandpaperybutnotunpleasant.Iwasjustgladtohavesomethinginmystomach.
“Thankyou,Sorin,”Isaid.
“Ofcourse,myqueen.”
Wecontinuedforafewhoursmore,stoppingoncetowaterthehorses.
Insteadofleadingthehorsestowater,thevampiresfilledbucketsforthehorsestodrawfrom.IleftMidnight’sside,hopingtosinkmyhandsintothecoolriver,butasIkneltonthebank,ahandclampeddownonmyshoulder.
“Donottouchthewater.”
IlookedupintoDaroc’sseverefaceandrosetomyfeet.Withhiswarningissuedandnoexplanation,heleftme.
“Ignorehim.Heisn’tverypolite,thoughhemeanswell,”Sorinsaid,comingtostandbesideme.
“Ithinkhehatesme.”
“Hedoesn’t,butheisveryfocusedonduty.Youarehisresponsibility.Hewilltakepersonaloffenseifyouarehurtonhiswatch.”
“Soundslikeyouknowhimverywell.”
Sorinraisedhisbrows.“Ido.Verywell.”Thenhepointedtothewater.“Animalsattractcreaturesjustashumansdo,somethatliveinthewater.Alps,inparticular,feastuponhorses,buttheyarenotpickywhentheyarehungry.”
Alpswerecreaturesthatcouldmorphintovaryingsizesdependingonthepreytheywerehunting.Theyhadfrightening,demon-likefaces,andtheirfeatureswerelarge,takingupmostoftheirface—awide,tooth-filledsmile,alarge,bulbousnose,dark,endlesseyes,andtall,pointedears.
“IhaveneverheardofalpsinLara,”Isaid.CommanderKilliantookthesepathswithhissoldiers;Iwascertainhehadstoppedtowaterhishorsesaswellandneverreportedattacks.
“Youdonothavetohearofthemforthemtoexist,”Sorinsaid.
“Isupposethatistrueenough,”Isaid.
Itwasalsofrightening,butthatwastheworldwelivedin.Istaredatthedarkwaterasitshimmeredovertherocksbeneathraysofmoonlightandcouldn’thelpfeelingalittlebetrayed.
“Allowme,”Sorinsaid.Retrievingabucket,hethendippeditintothewater.
“Howareyouabletoapproachthewater?”
Hesmiledruefully.“TheonlybloodthatpumpsthroughtheseveinsisthatwhichIdrain.”Ididmybestnottocringe,butSorincaughtmydiscomfortandlaughed.“Intime,youwillcometounderstand.”
“Ibegtodiffer,”Isaid.
Hissmilewidened,buthesaidnothingasheheldthebucketforme.Idippedmyhandsinthecoldwater,hatinghowmuchImistrusteditafterwhatSorinhadtoldme.AsIpressedcoolhandstomyheatedface,Ilookedathim.
“HowdidyoucometobepartofAdrian’sarmy?”Iasked.
“IhaveknownAdriansincethebeginning,”hesaid.
Iwonderedwhathemeantbythat.WashereferringtothetimeofAdrian’scurse?Orbeforethatwhenhe’dbeennothingmorethanaman?
“Youdidnotanswermyquestion,”Isaid,andthistime,whenhesmiled,itwasnotaswholesome.
“Nothinggetspastyou,doesit,myqueen?”
HelookedofftowhereDarocandAdrianstoodtogether.Mygazefollowed,andInotedhowDarocstiffenedandglancedtowardus.
“Areyou…lovers?”
“DarocandIaretwosouls,”hesaid.“Onecannotgowheretheotherdoesnotfollow.”
“WhydoIgetthesenseyoudidnotchoosethislife,”Isaid.
“Mountup!”Darocshoutedsuddenly,andIjumpedattheabruptnessofhisvoice.Iwonderedagainifallvampirescouldreadminds.
Sorinlookedbackatmeandsaid,“IchoseDaroc.Iamhappywiththat.”
Wecontinued.I’dfeltabriefreprievefrommylethargywhenI’ddismounted,butthesteadyswayofmyhorsemademyeyesfeelheavy.ThenextthingIfeltwasahandgraspingmyarm.Ijerkedandstraightened,lookingintoAdrian’swhite-blueeyes.
“Iwillholdyouifyouwishtosleep,”hesaid.
Hiswordssentashiverupmyspinethatfelttoothrilling.
“I’mfine,”Isaidcurtlyandscrubbedmyfacewithonehand.IcouldnotimaginewhatsortoflineI’dbecrossingifIagreedtosharehishorseandsleepinhisarms.Sexwasonething—thatrequirednotrustandnoaffection—butthiswasaleveloftrustIwasn’tpreparedtooffer.
Hedidnotargue,andonceagain,IfoundmyselfaloneintheprocessionasIcontinued—andfailed—tofightsleep.Itwasn’tuntilDarochaltedhissteedandhelduphishand,signalingfortheotherstofollow,thatmybodyawakened,nowpumpedfullofadrenaline.Ituggedonmyreins,staringintothedarkness,feelinguneasecreepalongthebackofmyneck.
“Attack!”Darocbarked.
“Thequeen!”Adriancommanded,andheyankedhishorsearoundasiftochargeforme.ButIwasconfused.Nothingseemedtobeamiss.
Thenafieryarrowcutthroughtheair,lodginginthecarriagebehindme.Othersfollowed,breachingthecurtainedwindow,ignitingtheinterior,andwithinseconds,itwasconsumedinfire.
Carriagesaretargets,Ithoughtjustasanarrowwhizzedpastmyface.Anotherhitmyhorsenearmyleg.
“No!”
Midnightneighedandsnorted,amarkofherpain.Shebuckedandthentriedtowalk,wobblinguntilshestumbledforwardasherlegsfoldedunderher.Asshehittheground,peopleemergedfrombetweenthetrees—mypeople,dressedingrayshrouds,bellowingfiercebattlecries.Somewerearmedwithweapons,whileotherscarriedequipmentfromtheirfarms—pitchforksandaxes,sicklesandslashers
“Stop!”Icommanded,butmyvoicewasburiedbeneaththeclashofweaponsasmypeoplemettheskilledendofavampire’ssword.Thebloodsprayedimmediately,andIwatchedinhorrorasmypeoplewereslaughteredbycreatureswhomovedfasterandhitharder.Ifelthelpless,sittingnearmyhorse,unsureofhowtoproceed.Icouldnotraisemyweaponsagainstthem.Icouldnotraisethemagainstmyhusband’sarmy—notwhenIwasexpectedtocontinuethisjourneytoRevekka.
Atrioofvampiresmadeanarcaroundme—SorinandIsacandMiha.Theirmovementswerecontrolled,theirbladescatchingeachblowaimedattheirbodies,andIgotthedistinctimpressiontheyweremovingslowerthantheywereactuallycapableof.Ihadexpecteddifferentbehaviorfromthem.I’dbeentoldvampiresfoughtwithnailsandteeth,thattheylungedinbattle,flyingthroughtheairtoattacktheirvictimswithaviciousnessIdidnotseehere.
Weretheytryingtosparemypeople?
MygazeshiftedtoAdrian,whowasinthemiddleofcuttingdownamanwhohadanarrowpulledbackonhisstring,buthehadnochancetoevenlooseitasAdrian’sbladefoundahomeinthehollowofhisneck.Asprayofbloodfollowedashepulledhisweaponfree.Anotherarrowracedtowardhisback,andhetwisted,knockingitoutoftheair,eyesnarrowingontheculprit—asmallermanwhostumbledbackathisapproach.
Irosetomyfeet.
“Staydown,myqueen!”Mihaordered.
ButIcouldn’t.Iwantedthebloodshedtostop,andIboltedthroughtheirbarrier.IwasnotsurewhatIreallyintendedtodo.PerhapsIthoughtifAdrianceasedfighting,otherswould.WhatIhadnotexpectedwasthedeterminationofmypeopletokillme.
Nolongerguardedbythetrio,Ibecameatarget.
“Thequeen!”someoneshoutedjustasaman,oneofmyown,cametowardme,bladeoverhead.Iturned,movingatthelastsecondandlettingmyknifereleaseintohisback.Therewasamomentwhenhepaused,hisbodyarchedunnaturallyashestared,wide-eyed,atme.Once,I’dbeenhisprincess,andnowIwashismurderer.Hisbladeclatteredtotheground,andhefollowed.
Itookuphisswordintimetofaceanotheropponent.Thewordfeltsowrong,tolookatthemanoppositemeasanenemy,andyetashecharged,anaxinhand,thatwasexactlythesidehetook.Heswunghisweaponviolently,andasIduckedtomisshisattack,Iswungmybladeout,cuttingintohislegs.HiscrywassilencedasIreleasedtheknifeatmywristintothebottomofhischin.Hisbloodcoatedmyhandandsprayedacrossmyface,andIshovedhimawayinhorror,blinkingthroughhottearsevenasanothergrippedmyhairandyankedmebackward.Istumbledandfell,savedonlybytheknifeIwasabletoreleaseatmywristtocounterablowaimedformyhead.
Alargemanstoodoverme,wieldingabladelikeanax,swingingdownasIrolledaway.Irearedup,kickingmyattackerintheface,andashereleasedhisholdonhisblade,Itookitandrosetomyfeet,shovingitthroughhisstomach.
Thefightcontinuedlikethatwithmypeoplecharging,callingmetraitor.EachtimeIcutdownoneofmyown,apieceofmewentwiththem.MyfacewaswetwithtearsasIfacedayounggirl.Shecouldnotbeanyolderthanme,withthesamedarkhair,thesamedarkeyes,thesamedarkskin.
“Whyareyoumakingmedothis?”Thequestiontorefrommymouth,adevastateddemand.
“Nooneismakingyou,”shereplied.“YouchosetheBloodKing.Youarethetraitor.”
Thosewordswereanevenharderblow,andItookastepback.
“Youknownothingofmysacrifice.”Myvoicewasvisceral,myhurtandangersoacute,Ifeltlikemyskinwasonfire.I’ddonethistoprotectthem.I’ddonethissothattheycouldhavesomekindoflifebeyondyesterday’ssurrender,andheretheywere,squanderingitall.
“Itdoesn’tlooklikesacrifice,”shesaid.“QueenofRevekka.”
Sheliftedherbladeandcharged.Myhandswereslickwithbloodandsweat,andmygriponmyswordwasfaulty.Icouldbarelyholdthehiltasherbladeclashedwithmine.Twomoreblowsandmyweaponflewfrommyhands.Astriumphflashedinhereyes,Ishovedmyotherhandtowardher,losingmyknifeinhersoftstomach.Hereyeswidened,herbodywentslack,andIcaughtherasshebegantofall.
“I’msosorry,”Isaid,butevenasshestaredblindlyatthenightsky,shespoke,herwordsharsh.
“Ifyouweretrulyoneofus,youwouldhavekilledhim.”
Blooddrippedfromhermouth,andasIsettledherupontheground,shewentslack.Mybodyshook,angry.Sittingthereonmyknees,Igaveafrustratedcryandshovedmydaggerintotheearthbeneathme.
Thesoundsofbattlediedaroundme,butIdidnotriseuntilAdrianapproached.
“Up,”hesaid,draggingmetomyfeet.
“Wehavetoburyher,”Isaid,staringintohisblood-spatteredface.“Wemustburythemall.”
Imightnotabidebythegoddesses’doctrines,buttheydid,andtheydeservedtheburialritesthey’dprayedfor.Iftheywereleftexposed,theywerelefttobefedupon,andtheirsoulswouldnevermakeittotheafterlife.
Thenmyeyesshiftedtothedeadlitteringtheroad,andasmallgroupofsurvivorswhowerenowontheirkneesbeforethevampires,swordspointedattheirthroats.
“Whatareyoudoing?”Idemanded.“Letthemgo!”
“Theyhavecommittedtreason,”Adrianresponded.“Theymustbepunished.”
Iunderstoodhisinclinationtopunish,becausewhatthey’ddonewaswrong,butthiswasdifferent…theseweremypeople.Theyhadarighttotheiranger.
“Youthinktheseareyourpeople,buttheyarenot.”
Mybrowslowered.“Iwasbornofthisland.”
“Youwillcometofindthatbloodhasnobearingonwhoyoubecome.”
“Adrian,please,”Ibreathed,buthejuststaredback,unmovedbymyplea.
“Ihavealreadysparedonelifeforyou.”
Mygazeshiftedtothefewwhowereleft,allglaringbackatus.Itwascleartheyconsideredmetheenemy.HowhadIgonefromthesaviorofmypeople—youarethehopeofourkingdom—tothis?
“Daroc,”hesaid.Itwasawordlesscommand.
“No!”
Iboltedforthem,butAdrian’sarmssnakedout,windingacrossmyshouldersandwaist.Heturnedmeatthelastsecondbeforethekillwasordered,andawetthudfollowedasthebodieshitthegroundinunison.
Itwasdone.
Adrian’schinhadsettledinthehollowofmyneck,andashespoke,Ifelthisbreathonmycheek.
“Theydonotdeserveyourtears.”
IdidnotknowifIcriedforthemanymoreorifIcriedformyself.IthoughtI’dlostmyfuturethemomentIagreedtomarrythismonster.Tonight,I’dlostmyhome.
Ipushedawayfromhimandwhirled.“Youdidn’thavetodothat!”
“Iftheycanattacktheirprincess,”hesaid,“whatisstoppingthemfromattackingtheirking?”
Hiswordshurt,anditwasworsebecauseIknewtheyweretrue.
“Come,”hesaid,placingahanduponmyshoulder.Heguidedmetohishorse,butbeforeImounted,Iturnedtolookathim.
“Youwillburythem,”Isaid.Itwasn’taquestion.
“Itwillbedone,”Adriansaid,takingmyfacebetweenhishands.“Butnotbyyou.”
Istared.“Youpromise.”
“Ipromise,”hesaid.
“WhyshouldIbelieveyou?”
Hiseyesfelltomylips,andhebrushedhisthumbagainstmycheek.“BecauseIonlymakepromisesforyou.”
Whyme?IfoundmyselfthinkingasIhadsomanytimesoverthelasttwodaysbutsaidnothing.I’dtakehispromisesnowbecauseoneday,theymightrunout.
“Up,”hecommanded,andthistime,Iobeyed.Adrianfollowedmeontothehorse,andIsettledagainsthim,cradledbyhisarmsaswetookoffintothedark.IfeltasthoughmychestwereunravelingasIleftthesoulsofmyslaughteredpeopleinthehandsofmyenemies.
Exceptthatthevampireshadn’tbeenmyenemiesinthatfight.
Ithadbeenmyownpeople.
Theshockoftheiranger,oftheirconvictionreverberatedthroughme,strikinginnewplaces—myheartandchest,mystomachandthroat.ItwasablowIhadnotanticipated.Ihadthoughttheywouldunderstandmysacrifice.IhadchosentomarryAdriantoensuretheirlivesneverchangedunderhisrule,butthathadnotbeenenough.They’dwantedhimdead.
Andnowtheywantedmedeadtoo.
IwasbeginningtothinkNadiawaswrong.
TherewasnocomingbacktoLara.
Adriansetabrutalpacethroughthewoodthattookusawayfromthemainpath.Thegroundwasuneven,whichcausedmybodytorockagainsthis,mythighsunabletogripShadow’ssides.Adrian’sarmslippedaroundmywaist,tighteningsothatIwassealedagainsthim.Heleanedforward,hischeekagainstmine.Itwasanintimatehold,butitwasastancethatkeptmeinplaceandurgedourhorseforward.
Wedidnotstopuntiltheskywastingedlightblue,asignofthecomingsun.Scoutsweresentahead,andbythetimewereachedthem,anencampmenthadbeenerected.Thesametall,blacktentsthathadloomedoutsideLaramadeahaphazardcircleuponabaldingpatchofearthsurroundedbythintrees.
Adriandismountednearhistent.
“Isolde,”hesaid,drawingmyattention.WhenIlookeddownathim,hewaswaitingformetofollow.Iconsideredtakingoff,ridinghardintowhatremainedofthewildnight.Ididn’tknowwhereIwouldgo.Backtomyhome?TothecastlewhereIwasnowknownasatraitor?
Adrian’shandclosedovermine,onceagaindrawingmyattention.
“Dismount,Isolde.”
Itwastheclosestthinghe’devergiventoacommand.Hedidnotsayit,butIreadthemessageinhiseyes—Ifyourun,Iwillcatchyou,andIknewhewould.Foramoment,Iletmyselfthinkaboutwhatthatwouldbelike,watchingAdrian’spowerandaggressiondescenduponmybody.Wewouldfightlikewefucked—brutally.
“Isolde,”hesaidmynameagain,tingedwithaharshnessthattoldmeheknewmythoughts.IlookedathimagainandswungmylegoverShadow’sbody.Adrianreachedforme,hislargehandssplayingacrossmywaistasheloweredmetotheground.Hedidnotletgoforafewmoments,andIknewitwasbecausehedidnottrustmenottobolt,butmythoughtsweregivingwaytosomethingelse—atangleinmychestthatbuiltasthetensionbetweenusgrew.
“Ifyouflee,youfleeintothehandsofyourenemiesnow,”hesaid.“Donotforgetwhattranspiredhere.”
Iscowled.“Youdonothavetoremindmeofmytreason.IthinkofitwhenIlookatyou.”
Hedidnotrespond,andIfoundmyselfwishingIcouldantagonizehiminsteadofamusehim,becauseIwasangry.Hekepthishandonthesmallofmybackashewalkedmetohistent.Inside,itwasspaciousandsimilarlyarrangedasitwasontheborderofRevekka,butthefirehe’dhadblazingthenightI’dcometoaskforKillian’slifeappearedtohavebeenreducedtoonlyhotembers.Itriednottowonderifhe’dmadethatconcessionforme.
Istoodatthecenteroftheroom,unmoving.
“Iamsorry,”hesaid,andthewordshitmewrong.
Ispuntofacehimandpushedhim.Hedidn’tbudge,buttheactfeltlikearelease,soIdiditagainandagain.Itdidnothingtohim,andthatonlymademeangrier.
“Areyoudone?”heasked.
Iscowledandrearedback,readytoreleasemybladeandshoveitintohisheart—notthatitwoulddoanygood—butAdrian’shandlatchedontomywrist,haltingmystrike.
Imethisgaze.
“No.”
Ishovedmyotherhandtowardhim,releasingmybladeagain,buthecaughtme,andthistimehepinnedmyhandsagainstmysides,steppingintome.
“Enough,Isolde!Iknowyougrieve—”
“Whatdoyouknowofgrief?”Ispat.“Youmademetheirenemy.”
“Theymadeyoutheenemy.Yourpeoplecouldhavejustaseasilytriedtoprotectyou.”
Iflinched,knowinghewasright,andthewordstookallmyfight.Hewalkedmebackwarduntilmykneeshitthebackofthebed,andIsat.Myeyeswereinlinewithhisstomach,andafteramoment,hetiltedmyheadup,hisfingerspoisedbeneathmychin,sothatmygazemethis.
“Youhadeveryrighttodefendyourself,”hesaid.“Takecomfort.Ifyouhadnotkilledthem,Iwouldhave,andIwouldnothavebeenmerciful.”
Iswallowedhard,wonderingwhatsortofjusticehewouldhaveexecutedonmybehalf.
“Youmustknowmyfatherhadnothingtodowiththeattack.”
Adrianstared,unblinking,asifhedidnotbelieveme.“Youaresocertain?”
“Yes,”Iwhisperedfiercely.
Forabriefmoment,Adrianlethisfingerstrailfrommychinovermyjawandacrossmycheekbone.Themovementwasgentleandsurprisedme.Assoonastheshockshudderedthroughme,hedroppedhishand.
“Sleep,”hesaidandtookastepaway.
Again,Ifoundmyselfsurprised.Iexpectedhimtodemandsexoratleastteaseit.
Heraisedabrow.“Unlessyouwouldpreferanotheractivity.”
Ilookeddownatmyclothes,spatteredwithblood.
“Abath,”Isaid.“Or…whatevercanbemanaged.”
Adriannoddedandleftthetent.
Ashortwhilelater,hereturnedwithabucketandacloth.Whilehe’dbeengone,hehadwashedhisface,thoughhisclotheswerestillstainedwiththecarnageofourbattle.
“Itisallwecanmanage,”hesaid,settingitdownatthecenterofthetent.After,hetookaseatoppositeme,spreadinghislegswide.
“I…don’thaveanythingtowear,”Isaid.
“Itisnoproblem,”Adrianreplied.
Iglaredathim,buthonestly,IdidnotcareasmuchasIpretended.Ilikedmybody,Ilikedbeingunrestricted,soIremovedmycloak,thenmybootsandtherestofmyclothes.Mylegsandlowerbackached,anditwasn’tuntilnowthatIrealizedhowmuchdamageI’ddonetomyhandsduringthefight.Theyhurt,myknuckleswerebruised,andmyfingerswerecut.Isubmergedtheminthewaterandwatchedtheblooddanceawayinribbonsofred,ignoringAdrian’sburninggaze.Afterafewmoments,Iusedtheclothtobeginscrubbingawaytheremainingblood.Someofitwasmine,butmostofitwasmyattackers.
Mypeople,Ikeptremindingmyself,stillindisbelief.
“Whathappenedtoyourmother?”
Ifrozeathisquestion,notexpectingitbutalsounsureifIwantedtosharewhatlittleIhadofherwithhim.Ifocusedonmytask.
“Shedied,”Isaid.
“Awhileago?”hepried.
“WhenIwasborn.”
Adrianwassilent,andImovedonfromcleaningmyhandstomyarms,mychestandstomach.Ifelthisgazeonallpartsofme,evenasheaskedtheseseriousquestions.“Whatdoyoumissmostabouther?”
Hisquestionshockedme,andIhatedbeingshockedbyhim.Itwasbothcuriousandsincere,andIhadananswer.
“Imissherpotential,”Ianswered,staringathim.“Imisswhatcouldhavebeenwithherasmymother.”
Heseemedstrangelythoughtful.Iassumedthequestionswereoverandhadreturnedtomytaskwhenhecontinued.“Whotaughtyoutoride?”
Ipausedabeat,myfrustrationgrowing.“Myfather.”
“Whotaughtyoutofight?”
“Mycommanders.”
“AlecKillian?”
Onceagain,Ihaltedmytask,andthistime,Iturnedtofacehimfully.Myeyesroamedfromhisfacetohispowerfulshoulderstohiscock,whichstrainedagainstthefabricofhisclothes.
“Jealous,KingAdrian?”Itaunted.
Hetiltedhisheadup,mouthandbodytightening.
“Iamjusttryingtoascertainwhatisleftformetoteach.”
Hiswordsinspiredheattoblossominmystomach,andIwantedtotremble,butItightenedmymusclestokeepfromshowingweakness.
“Idon’tknowthereismuchyoucanteachme,Adrian,excepthate.”
Asmilecurvedhislips,andthenherosetohisfeet.Ashedid,theedgesofhisclothingbrushedmyskin,andtheshiverI’dfoughtsohardtokeepatbayshookme.Ibentmyheadbacktoholdhisgazeashetoweredoverme.
“Sparrow,”hemurmured,liftinghishandtoholdmyjaw,thumbbrushingmycheekashe’ddoneearlier.“Ithinkyouareright.”
Ifelthislipsbrushmineashespoke,andIthoughthewouldkissme,butinstead,hedroppedhishandandslippedfromhisplacebetweenmeandhischair,leavingthetent.
Assoonashewasgone,IrealizedhowmuchI’dwantedhimtokissme,becauseI’dwantedthepleasurehepromised.I’dwantedtogetlostinhimsoIcouldforgetmyreality.
Itwasgoodhe’dleftmealone.
Iturnedbacktothebasinandfinishedwashingup.After,IcurledintothefurscoveringAdrian’sbed.Ittookmeawhiletofallasleep,mymindracingwithmyrecentpast.Itfollowedasthedarkdescended,andallIheardwastheclashofmetalandthescreamsofmypeople.Nine
Thosescreamscontinued,butwhenIwokeup,itwastosilence.Theonlythingthatclungtomewasafeelingofdreadthathadsettleddeepinmychest.Besideme,Adrianwasasleep.Hewasnakedandlayatopthecovers.Thelowlightfromthebrazierreflectedoffhisleanandhardmuscles.Thecurveofhiserectiondrewmyeyes,andIwonderedifhewasevernotaroused.Iconsideredthathewastootrustingtofallasleepbesidemelikethis,andyetIdidnothingbutslipfrombedanddress,steppingintothefadingday.Allaround,thewoodslookedasiftheywereburning,setaflamebythesun.
Thecampwasquiet,eerie,andIdidnotfeelassafeasIexpected,giventhatIwasstillwithinthebordersofmyhome.Evenoutsidethetent,theicyfeelinginthepitofmystomachremained,andIcouldn’tshakethefeelingthatsomethinghorriblewasabouttohappen.
Ahigh-pitchedmewlingdrewmyattention,andIturnedinthedirectionofthesound.Betweenthedeadboughsofthetrees,Isawbuzzardscircling.Again,thatstrangedreadovercameme,sharperthistime.They’relookingforfood,IthoughtandhopedAdriankepthispromisetoburymypeople.
Achillwindsweptfrombehindme,draggingmyhairintomyfaceandcarryingthedistinctsmellofdeath,butweweretoofarfromthosewhohadperishedlastnight,andthissmellwasstrong,indicatingdaysofdecay.Anothercryeruptedfromthevultures,andIwatchedasonepeeledawayfromthevolt.Asitdid,theothersfollowed.
AndsodidI.
Icutthroughthetrees,followingthebirdsinthefadingdaylight.Istartedmovingatawalk,butmypaceincreased.AsIwent,treelimbscaughtmyhairandthornsgrippedmyclothesandscratchedmyskin,butIwasurgedonbyasenseofalarmthatturnedmystomach,despiteagrowingfearofwhatIwouldfind.
Thetreesbegantothin,andIcameuponavillagethatwassurroundedbyatightlywovenwoodenfence.InLara,mostofthevillagesweregiventhenameofthefamilywhofoundedthem.Inthiscase,acarvedsignindicatedthenametobeVaida.
Thegate,whichfacedme,wasclosed.Thatwasnotunusual,asitwasalmostsunset.Whatwasunusualwasthequiet…andthesmell.
Therewasdeathhere.
Thevulturescawed,andIsawthemswoopdowntolandinsidethegateasIapproached.
“Hello!”Icalled,andmyvoiceechoedinthetreesaroundme.Itwasunsettling,andasthewindpickedup,swirlingthesmellofrot,myskinprickled.
Ipushedonthegate,rattlingittogetsomeone’s—anyone’s—attention,buttherewasnoresponse.
Asoldiershouldbestationedhere,Ithought.OneofKillian’sguards.
Isqueezedmyhandsbetweenthefenceandthegateandtriedtopryopenthedoor.TherewasenoughofacrackthatIcouldpeerthrough,andwhatIsawelicitedacryfrommythroat.
Ireleasedthegate,turnedonmyheels,andvomited.
“Isolde!”
Thevoicethatcalledmynamewasfamiliar,andIdidn’texpectitspresence.Ilookedup,sobbing,andscreamedatKillian,whorodetowardmeuponhishorse.
“They’redead!They’re—”
Icouldn’tsayit.I’donlyseenpartoftwobodies,buttheyseemedtohavebeenskinnedalive.AsIrecalledwhatI’dwitnessed,mystomachroiledagain.
Killiandismountedandcametome.
“Weneedtoleave,”hesaidandtookmyshoulders,pullingmefromthefence.Iwrenchedaway.
“Didyounothearme?”
“Iheardyou,”hesaidthroughhisteeth.“Andifwedon’tleavenow,we’renext!”
“Releasemywife,Commander.”
Adrian’svoicewascold,buthispresencesurprisedKillianenoughthatheloosenedhishold,andIwhirledtowardAdrian,whostoodapartfromus.Helookedjustascallousashisvoicehadsounded,hisfaceandhairpale,hisclothingimmaculate.
“They’realldead,”Isaidagain.
“Heknows,”Killiansaid.“He’sresponsible.”
IfKillian’swordsangeredAdrian,hedidnotshowit.Heremainedcalmasheasked,“Youaresocertain,Commander?”
Ishookmyheadandswallowed,feelingthebileriseinthebackofmythroatagain.“No.Thiswasn’tvampires.Thiswas…”
Ididnotknow,butIknewvampireattacks,andvampiresdidnotleavehumanslookinglikewhatI’dseen…didthey?
Adrian’seyesmetmine,andinaninstant,Daroc,Sorin,Isac,andMihaappeared.Iblinked,shockedbyhowquicklytheymoved.
“Openthegate,”Adriancommanded.
IwatchedasDaroceffortlesslyscaledthewall.
“Donotlook,”Adriansaidasthegategroanedopen.
Allthewhile,Adrianheldmygaze,evenasDarocreturnedtosummonhim.
“YourMajesty,youwillwanttoseethis.”
Adrian’seyesdidnotwaver,anditwasifhewereaskingmeifI’dbeokay.
IswallowedandnoddedbeforeIwasleftalonewithKillian.Ihadwordsforhimanyway.Ididn’twatchAdriandisappearintothevillage,becauseIhadseenenoughtoknowthatthebodieslayrightbeforethegate.Itwasn’tuntilKillianhimselfstoppedwatchingandshiftedtolookatmethatIspoke.
“Yourmenshouldhavebeenpatrolling.Howlonghasitbeensincetheyventuredthisfarnorth?”
“Youberatemefornotprotectingthemyetturntothemanwhoslaughteredourpeople.Wefoundthegraves,Isolde.”Killiansteppedinfrontofme.“Leavewithme.Youaren’tsafewiththem.”
“Iamnotsafehere,”Iargued.“Ourpeople,theonesyoufound.Theytriedtokillme.”
“Youwerejustcaughtinthecrossfire—”
“No,Alec,Iwasn’t.”
Therewasapause,andthenhesaid,“Youcannotbeangrywiththem.Youdidnotevenresistwhenhetookyouaway.”
MylipsflattenedasIglared.Myangerwasacute,aflushthatmademywholebodyhot.Killianhadbeenpresentduringthediscussion.
“YouknowwhyIdidn’tresist.”
“Why?Becauseyoufearedforyourpeople?Orbecausehefuckedyouthewayyouwanted?”
Inarrowedmyeyes.I’dguessedthathe’dlingeredoutsidemydooronthenightofourwedding,andthisconfirmedit.
“Donotshameme,Killian.”
“Iamonlypointingoutthatdespiteprofessingtohatehim,youappeartoenjoyhiscompany.”
“Soyouarejustifyingtheattack,”Isaid.
“Isolde—”
“Iamyourqueen,”Icuthimoff.“Youwilladdressmeassuch.”
Killian’sjawtightened,andhiseyesflared.“Sothisishowitwillbe.”
“Ifwhatyouhavesaidistrulyhowyoufeel,thenyes.”
Heblinked,andforamoment,Icouldseehisdoubtandconfusionwarring.
“Ifyouarefinishedtryingtoconvincemybridetoleaveme,thenIthinkitwouldbewiseforyoutoinformyourkingofwhathasoccurredhere.”
IflinchedatAdrian’swordsandturnedtofacehim.AsIdid,Icaughtaglimpseofthecorpsesbeyondthefenceandfelttheblooddrainfrommyfaceoncemore.Adrianshiftedtoblockmyview.
“AndwhatexactlywillItellhim?”Killianasked.
“Thatawholevillagewasslaughtered,”hesaid.
“Bywhom?”Iasked.
Adrian’seyessettledonmine,anddespitethefiercenessofhisexpression,hisgazeseemedtosoften.
“Myguesswouldbemagic.”
“Thereisnomagic,saveyours,”Killianaccused.
“Thatisamythofourexistence,”Adriansaid.“Ihaveabilities,notmagic.”
“IthoughtmagichadbeeneradicatedwiththeBurning,”Isaid.
“Solongasspellsexist,magicwillprevail,”hesaid.“Thisisthekindofchaoshumansmakewhentheysummonmagictheycannotcontrol.”
Magicwasconsideredagift,notaskill.EvenbeforeKingDragosorderedtheBurning,thosewhowerenotbornwithmagicwereforbiddentospeakspells.
“Youaresayingoneofourownspokethis”—Killiangesturedtowardthevillage—“intoexistence?”
“Notnecessarily,”Adriansaid.“Thespellcouldhavebeencastfromanywhere.”
Ifeltevenmoredreadatthatthought.
“Anddoyoureallythinkmykingwillbelievethat?Knowingyouwerehere?”
“Myfatherwillbelieveyou,Commander,”Iargued.“Adrianhastoldyouwhathethinksoccurred.Youshouldcommunicatethat.”
Killianstaredandkepthisjawtight,butafteramoment,hebowed.PartofmewantedtogowithhimsoIcouldtellmyfatherwhatI’dseenmyself.IknewKillianwouldnotwanttoadmitthathisguardshadneglectedtotravelthisfar.Ialsowonderedifthisvillagewasdestroyed,weretheothers?
Thecommanderdeparted,andafteramoment,IfeltAdriandrawapieceofmyhairbehindmyear.
“Howareyou?”heasked.
Istaredathim,mymouthslightlyajar.Ididn’tknowwhyitalwayssurprisedmethatheaskedifIwasallright,andyetthiswasthethirdtime.
“Willthishappenagain?”Iasked.
Ididnotknowmuchaboutmagic.Onceaspellwascast,wasitlikeaplague?Diditcontinueuntilithadnothingtoconsume?
“Itishardtosaywithoutknowingwhatkindofspellwascastorbywhom,”Adrianreplied.
Sohewastellingmetherewasnowaytofightit.Iswallowedthethicknessgatheringinmythroat.
“Wehavetoburythem,”Isaid.
“We’llhavetoburnthem,”Adriancorrected,anddespitethegentlenessofhistone,Istillflinched.
Untilcorpsesbegantorisefromthedead,burningwasforwitchesandthosewhowerecaughtusingmagic—notvictimsofit.
“Doyouthinktheywillriseagain?”Iasked.
“No,butsincewedonotknowwhatkilledthem,fireisbest.Itwillcleansetheground.”
***
Adrianreturnedtocampwithme,andImanagedtokeepmytearsatbayuntilwewereinsidethetent.Heleftmetocry,forwhichIwasthankful,andreturnedlaterafterI’dcomposedmyself.Werodetotheclearingtogether,thecoldairstingingmywetface,andasweapproachedVaida,Icouldseeseveralbodiespiledinthecenteroftownthroughtheopengate,allcoveredinwhitecloth.Adrian’ssoldiershadbeenhardatworkinmyabsence,andIadmiredthecarethey’dtakentowrapandstackthem,evenifitwasonlysotheycouldbeconsumedwithfire.
Wekeptourdistancefromtheopengateasthevampiresdroppedtorchesuponthebodiesandmadetheirwayout,closingthegatebehindthem.Itwasn’tlongbeforethesmokerose,spreadingthesmellofburningflesh.
AsIwatchedthesmokerise,Ispoke,notlookingatAdrian.“Howdidyouknowthiswasaspell?”
“Iamovertwohundredyearsold,”hesaidasawayofanswering.
ItmeantthathehadlivedduringtheBurning.
Ihadquestionsforhim—questionsaboutmagicandwitchesandtheworldthathehadexistedinlongbeforeIwasborn—butIdidnotaskthem,becausetherewasapartofmethatwonderedifIcouldtrusthisanswers.
Afteramoment,Adrianturnedtome.“Iwillleaveoneofmymenbehindtoaidyourfather,butwemustcontinueontoRevekka.”
Ihesitatedashespoke,thehateIfeltforhimoverpoweredbyasenseofgratitude.
Hecalledtooneofhissoldiers.“Gavriel!”
Alargeblondvampirestrodeforward,hisgoldarmorglintinginthefirelight.
“ReturntoCastleFiora,”Adriansaid.“TakeArithandCiprianwithyou.”
“Yes,myking,”hesaidandthenlookedatme.“Myqueen.”
Thethreewastednotimemountingtheirhorsesandsettingoffinthedirectionofmyhome.Iworriedattheirreturnbuthopedmyfather,atleast,wouldaccepttheiraid.
“Thankyou,”IsaidtoAdrian,thoughthewordssoundedstrangeinthespacebetweenus.
Hedidnotsmile,didnotactasifthewordsaffectedhim.
Hecrossedthefieldtohishorse.IttookmelongertomoveasIstaredattheflamesthatwerenowconsumingthewoodenwall,effectivelyerasingVaidafromexistence.IcouldnotexplainthegriefIfeltformypeopleortheguiltthatburdenedmeasIpreparedtoleavethemtofacethisunknownenemy.
Buttherewasapartofme,asmallone,thatfeltlikeitwassomekindofretribution.
IrelentedandwenttowardAdrian,mountinghishorse.Hefollowedbehindme,hisbodycradlingmineaswecontinuedthroughthedarkness.
***
Ihadexpectedtorelaxmoreasthehourspassedonourjourney.Instead,IfoundthatIwasevenmoreonedge,waitingforthenextattackortofindthenextmassacre.IthadonlybeenadaysinceleavingHighCity,andyetthosehourshadbeenfilledwithahorrorI’dneverexpected—somethingfargreaterthanthearrivalofvampiresatourborder.
“Youaresafe,”Adriansaid,andIwasconsciousofhowhishandpressedagainstmystomach.
“Iamsafe,”Isaid.“Butwhataboutmypeople?Yousaidyouwouldprotectthem.”
“IhavegivenyouallIcanagainstmagic,”hesaid.
Iwantedtobeangryathimfornotbeingthatpowerful,butIcouldn’tmustertheenergy.Instead,Iasked,“Ididnotthinktherewasanyoneleftwhocouldspeakspells.”
“Doyoureallybelieveakingletthatkindofpowerslipthroughhisfingers?”Adrianasked.Iturnedmyheadtowardhim,butwithmybacktohischest,Icouldonlyfeelthebrushofhisjawagainstmycheek.HewasreferringtoDragos,theformerkingofRevekka,whomhehadkilled.
“Isthatwhyyoumurderedhim?”Iasked.“Becauseyouwantedwhathehad?”
Hedidnotanswerthequestion.Instead,hesaid,“Soyouknowmyhistory.”
“Everyoneknowsyourhistory,”Isaid.“YoustormedtheRedPalaceandmurderedKingDragosandhispregnantwifeintheirsleep.”
“Ididnotmurderthemintheirsleep,”hesaid.“Theyweredraggedfromtheirbeds,andwhenDragosfacedme,hebeggedforhislifetobesparedandofferedhiswifeasagift.Islaughteredhim.HiswifeIspared,butshejumpedfromhertowerwindow.”Hepausedandthenadded,“Ididnotknowshewaswithchilduntilafterherdeath.”
“Doyouthinkthatsomehowexcusesyouractions?”
“Iamnotseekingapardon,”hereplied.
Iexpectedhimtoexplainhimself,totellmethatthemurderwasjustified,buthedidn’t,andafterthat,wedidnotspeak.
Wedidnottravelaslongasthepreviousnight,stoppingafewhoursbeforesunrise.Onceagain,whenwereachedourchosencampground,thetentswerealreadyup,andthevampireswhohadriddenaheadtopreparecamphadalreadylitfiresforwarmthandfood.
“Tomorrow,wewillbeinRevekka,”hesaid,followingmeintoourtent.“Doyouneedanything?”
Heseemedinahurry,whichIfoundstrange.Ithoughthewouldlinger,andIhatedtoadmitthatI’dhopedhewould.IhadquestionsaboutspellsandwitchesandtheBurning,butifhecouldreadmymind,hedidnotjumptoofferanswers.Iwasn’tsureifthatwasduetomyemotionsnotbeingextremeenoughforhimtosensewhatIwasthinkingorbecausehewantedtoleave,soIshookmyhead.“No.”
Inotedhowheswallowedandinhaledasharpbreath.“Thengetsomerest.”
Iwouldaskhimwherehewasgoing,butIdidnotwanthimtothinkIwasaskinghimtostay,soIlethimgo.
Oncehewasgone,IshedmyclothesandcurledintoAdrian’swarmfurs,butIcouldnotsleep.Ikeptthinkingofhowquicklythoseinthecastle,atthegates,andinthevillagesbeyondHighCityhadturnedonme.EvenKillianseemedtothinkmychoicetomarryAdrianmeantIhadchosenaside.Exceptnow,IfeltlikeIwasbeingforcedtotheonlysidethathaddefendedme,thathadsworntokeepmesafeandhadactuallydoneso.
WhydidithavetobeAdrianwhokepthispromises?
Isighedandsatup,toorestlesstosleep,andleftthebed.Idressedinmytunicandcloak,decidingtostepintowhatremainedofthenight.IfIwasinHighCity,Iwouldhavewanderedbeyondthegatesofthecastleinsearchofstars,buttherewerefewleftastheearlymorninggrewbrighter.EvenifIhadwantedtobealone,IdidnottrustthesewoodsorthemonstersImighthaveattracted,sothecampwouldhavetodo.
Ipeeredthroughthetentopening,findingafewofAdrian’ssoldierslingeringnearthefirethathadbeenbuiltbetweenusandtherestofthecamp.Ihadafeelingthey’dbeenstationedtheretoguardmeuntilAdrianreturned,andIwonderedwhereSorin,Isac,andMihahadgone.Iwasgrowingfondofthetrio,butIthoughtitwouldbehardertoconvincethosethreetoletmewalkaroundthegroundsalonethanitwouldthesefourstrangers.
Isteppedoutofthetent.Theairwascoldagainstmyskinandmytunictooshortforthisweather,butbeingoutsideintheopenmademefeelasthoughIcouldbreatheagain.Thevampireswhoweregatheredaroundthefirelookedoverandscrambledtotheirfeet.
“Myqueen,”onesaid.“MayIbeofassistance?”
“Icannotsleep.Iamgoingtowalktheperimeterofthecamp.”
Thethreeexchangedalook.“Canshedothat?”
“IthinkwhatyoumeaniswillAdrianlikethat?”Isaid.“Andfortherecord,Idonotcare.”
“Atleastallowoneofustoescortyou,”anothersuggested.
“Icandefendmyself.”
“Weareaware,YourMajesty,but—”
“Iappreciatetheoffer,butIwouldliketobealone,”Isaid,anddrewmycloaktighteraroundmybody,andthoughtheyallowedmethespacetostrollbetweenthetents,Ifelttheireyesonme—noonewaslettingmeoutoftheirsight.
ThiswasthefirsttimeI’dwanderedfartherthanAdrian’stent,whichwassomedistancefromtheothers,andasIcutthroughtotheedgeofthewood,IwasnotpreparedforwhatIheardasIpassed—passionatemoans,chantednames,desperatepleastoletmecome
IsupposeIshouldhaveexpectedmoregrotesquedisplaysofsexualbehaviorbasedonwhatI’dlearnedaboutvampires,butIhadnoteventhoughtofitbeyondmyownexperiencewithAdrian.Hearingthesepleasurablesounds,however,mademestiffen,andsuddenlyIworriedoverwhyAdrianhadbeeninsuchahurrytoleaveourtent.
WhatwouldIdoifIfoundhimwithanotherwoman?Thethoughtfilledmewithanacuterage.Inpart,itwasduetothefactthatIhadtogiveupmylifetoexistwithhiminaforeignlandandalsobecauseIhadaskedhimnottosleepwithotherwomenafterweweremarried.Ifhebrokethatpromise,Iwouldmakehimsuffer.
ButIneverheardhisvoice,onlythecriesofhisarmy—inparticularthoseofSorin,whogaspedDaroc’snamesoloud,myheartjumpedintomythroat.IwonderedatAdrian’ssecond-in-command.Thestoicguardseemedfartooserioustohaveanypassion,buthearingwhatIwas,Ihadclearlybeenwrong.
Iturnedthecornerandglancedtomyleft,myeyescatchingonasliveroflightthatcutacrossthegroundfromatent.Ihalted.There,throughtheopening,IsawAdrianholdingawoman.Herheadwasbentback,herpalehairspillingintohislap,hislipspressedtoherneck,andwhiletheirembracelookedsensual,Iknewithadnothingtodowithsex.Hewasfeeding.Behindhimwereothervampires,mouthsmoldedtonecksandwrists,crimsonspillingontotheirskinandclothes.
NowIunderstoodwhyI’dneverseenanyofthemfeedontheroadandwhywestoppedtravelingbeforesunrise.IshouldfeelgratefulthatIhadn’thadtowitnessitbefore,butseeingthisnow,IfoundthatIwasbothhorrifiedandangry.Theactwasdespicablebutalsointimate,andahorriblejealousytorethroughmeasthewomanAdrianwasholdingarchedintohim,herfingersdiggingintohisskin.
Atmyflareofanger,helookedup,hisbrighteyesmeetingmineevenatthisdistance.Myhorroroverpoweredmyjealousy,andIturnedonmyheelsandreturnedtothetent.IhalfexpectedAdriantofollow,buthedidn’t.Icrawledbeneathhisfurs,takingabreaththatrattledmywholechestbeforeclosingmyeyesagainstthreateningtears.
Iwaslivinginawholenewworld.
IwokelaterandrolledovertofindAdrianreclininginachairacrossthetent.Candleflameflickeredonatablebesidehim,highlightinghisgrimfeatures.Hewassopristine,sobeautiful,IwasgladI’dseenhimwiththewomanearlier.I’dletafewkindnessesblindmetowhohereallywas—amonster.
“Didyoufuckher?”Iasked.“Thewomanwhosebloodyoutook?”
Hiseyesconnectedwithmine.“No.”
Istudiedhisexpressionforalongmoment,tryingtodecideifhewaslying,buttheBloodKinghadneverbeenanythingbuthonest—frustratinglyso.
“Who…wasshe?”
Iassumedshewasnowdead,butAdriancorrectedme.“Sheisavassal,”hesaid.“She—likemanymortals—haveagreedtoservemeandmycourt.”
Mygutreactionwastobedisgusted.“Serveyou?”
Ididnotknowwhatthatmeant.Didthatonlymeanbloodletting?Orwashesuggestingmore?
“Theyoffertheirbloodandarerichlyrewarded,”heexplained.
“Soyoubribethem?”
“Youmaycallitwhateveryoulike,”hesaid.“Intheend,Iamfed,andtheyarerich.”
“Soyoupaythemfromthetreasuryyoustole?”
Hestaredatme,hishandproppedagainsthisface,lithefingersfannedagainsthischeek.WhileIgotthesensehedidnotlikemyreply,healsodidnotletmycommentantagonizehimasheanswered,“AtleastIpaythem.”
Iwantedtorollmyeyesathim,butIrefrainedandasked,“Howoftendoyoudrink?”
“Everyday,”hesaid.
“Whathappensifyoudon’t?”
“Itismysustenance,”heanswered.
“YoutoldmebeforeIwouldbegyoutotakefromme.WhywouldIeverwantthat?”
IcouldnotimaginehowhewouldthinkIwouldwanthimtofeedfromme.
Hesmiled.“BecauseasmuchasIdrawlifefromit,allyouwillfeelissweetrelease,”hesaid,andthenhetiltedhishead.“Youlikerelease,don’tyou,Sparrow?”
Iignoredhisquestion.“Ifailtoseehowsomethingsovulgarcouldmeanpleasure.”
“Therearealotofvulgarthingsthatbringpleasure,”hesaid.“Iamoneofthem.”
“Soyouaretellingmethis…bloodletting…bringsyourvassalpleasure?”
Therewassomethingaboutthatknowledgethatfeltlikebetrayal.
Again,therewasapauseasAdrianreplied,“Youaremorethanwelcometotakeherplace.”
“I’drathernot,”Isaid.
I’dalreadyofferedmybodytothisman.Offeringmybloodwouldbeanevengreaterbetrayal.Besides,Ididnotliketheideaofbeingconnectedtohiminthatway—ofbeingsustenance.
“Haveyoubeen…fedfrom?”Iasked.
“No,”hesaid,andtherewasastrangesadnesstohiseyes.“Noonefeedsfromme.”
“Why?”
“BecauseIdonotallowit.”
“Why?”Myvoiceseemedtogrowsmallerandsmaller.Adrianpaused,staringatmebeforerisingandapproachingthebed.Hisrobehungopen,exposinghischestandhiserectcock,whichwaswheremyeyescaughtuntilheplacedhishandonmyface,hookinghisfingersintomyhair.
“Becauseonlymyqueenmaytakefromme,andsheismortal.”
Thenhismouthclosedovermine.Itriedhardtokeepmyhandstomyself,refusingtoshowhimhowmuchIwantedthis,butIarchedtohim,likeapuppetattachedtoastring.Ireleasedthefursfrommygripandtwinedmyfingersinhishair.Heliftedme,mylegswoundaroundhiswaist,andheturnedtositwithmeinhisarms.Mytunicrodeup,andmynakedfleshsatagainsthisswollenlength.Thefeelofhimhadmystomachtighteningintoahardknot.Hislipsleftminetotrailalongmyjaw,downmyneck,overmyshoulder.Ashemoved,Ifeltthescrapeofhisteeth.Allthewhile,hishandspressedintomyassasheguidedmealonghiscock.Igaspedatthefeelofhim,thickandheavybetweenmythighs.
Thenhedippedhishead,hismouthclosingovermynipple,peakedwitharousal,andhespokeagainstmyskin.“Icoulddrinkfromyou,youaresowet,”hesaid.
IfoundmyselfpushinghimontohisbackwhileIstraddledhim.
“Thendrink,”Ichallenged,andhegrinnedasheguidedmetohisface.Ikeptmostofmyweightonmyknees,stayingstillashebegan,histonguelickingandthrusting,hislipssuckingandkissing,butsoonIstartedtorockagainsthismouth,tiltingmyhips,grindingharder.ThemoreImoaned,theharderAdrian’shandspressedintomythighs,myass,mybreasts.Hewaseverywhereallatonce,andIwaslostinthis,addictedtothefeelingbuildinginsideme.Ichasedit,racedforit,settingafasterpacethatAdrianseemedalltoopleasedtomaintain.Icamewithagutturalcry,andheheldmeafewmomentslonger,drinkingbetweenmythighsjustashepromised.
Thenhehelpedmeslidedownhisbodybeforeherolled,pinningmebeneathhimonthebed.Hislegspartedmine,thecrownofhiscockpoisedatmyentrance.
“Howistastingyourcomedifferentfromdrinkingyourblood?”heasked.
Istaredathim.“Drinkingbloodissacrilege.”
“Accordingtoyourgoddess,”hesaid.“It’snotthefirsttimeAshahasvillainizedsomethingshewishedtodestroy.”
Mybrowsknittedtogether.Iwasconfusedbyhisstatement—whatelsehadshevillainized?Iwasalsodesperatetofeelhimmove.“Thatisblasphemy.”
“Areyoupretendingtobepious?”heasked,asmallsmileonhislips.Perspirationhadformedonhisface,andIfeltheatbuildingbetweenus.
“Idon’tknowwhatyoumeanbypretending,”Isaid.“Iamasaint.”
“Oh,Sparrow,noonewhofuckslikeyouisasaint,”hesaidandfilledmeinonebrutalthrust.Icriedoutatthefeelofhim,instinctivelyliftingmyhipsandwideningmylegstoaccommodatehimdeeper.WhenIfocusedonhiseyesagain,hebenttopresshislipstomyneckandjaw.
“Singforme,Sparrow,”hecommandedandsethispace,movinginsidemesteadily.Itwasneitherslownorrapid.Allthewhile,hewatchedme,hislonghairteasingmyskin,andIdidexactlyashebid—Isangforhim,Icriedforhim,Iscreamedforhim.Ten
Asthesunset,Isteppedoutofthetent,findingthatmostofthecamphadalreadybeenpacked.Iwasexhaustedandmybodyached;boththingswouldmaketonight’sridedifficult.IwasalsounreasonablyfrustratedwithmyselfandmyfeelingsforAdrian.Ievenhatedtocallthemfeelings,butIwasfindingithardertohatetheactualpersonbehindthemonster,andthatwassomethingIhadnotexpectedinourshorttimetogether.Ireasonedthattheanswerwassimple:Adrianhadbeenkind.Hehadburiedmypeopleaccordingtoourcustoms.Hehadlefthissoldierstoaidmyfatheragainstanunknownthreat.Hehadkepthispromisestome.
ButthosepromiseswereforLara,notCordova—andthoseweremypeopletoo.Intheend,hewouldkillanyonewhodidnotsubmittohiswill.
Ihadtorememberthat.
“PrincessIsolde.”
IturnedtowardthefemininevoicethathadusedmyoldtitleandmetthedarkstareofAdrian’svassal.AsIstudiedher,IrememberedwhatAdrianhadsaid—thattheywererichlyrewarded,whichwasevidentinthefursandbluesilkshewasdrapedin.Halfofherblondhairwaspinnedup,andtherestfellincurlsaroundhershoulders.Herfeatureswerepretty,smallandpointed,buttherewassomethingviciousinhergaze:adarkthingthatlivedbeneathherslightfacade
Ihadnotroubleshowinghermyownviciousside,seeingnoneedtohideit.“Iammarriedtoyourking,whichmakesmeyourqueen,”Isaid.
Hermouthopened,herfacepaled,butsherecoveredwell,offeringalaughthatgratedagainstmyears.“Ofcourse,Iapologize.IamSafira,Adrian’sfavoredvassal.”
Myeyesdroppedtoherglovedhand,whichsheextendedtome.
Ididnottakeitandliftedmygazetohersoncemore.“AsKingAdrian’sfavoredvassal,Iwouldthinkyouwouldbefamiliarwiththeetiquetteofapproachingaroyal,”Isaid.
Safira’sfakesmilefell.“OfcourseIamfamiliarwithetiquette,”sheanswered,thoughshestilldidnotmovetobow.“Imerelyfeltthatweweremoreequal,givenweareresponsibleforAdrian’spleasure.”
“Youthoughtwrong,”Isaid.“Ifyouapproachmeagain,Iexpectyouwillcurtsyandaddressmebytheappropriatetitle.”
IwasalittlerelievedwhenSafiradroppedherfalsewarmth.Herexpressionbecameicy,hercheeksrosy,assheanswered,“My,youcertainlyhaveadjustedwelltoyournewposition.”
“Iwasbredtobeaqueen,”Isaidandtookasteptowardher.“JustasIwasbredtodisposeofthingsthatbotherme.Willyoucontinuetobotherme,Safira?”
Hermouthpressedintoatightline,andsheliftedherchin,glaringatme.“Ifyoutouchme,youwillfaceAdrian’swrath.”
IhadnotbeenmarriedtoAdrianlong,butlastnight,he’dessentiallyofferedmeherplace.Ididnotthinkshewasasirreplaceableasshethought.Itookanothersteptowardher.
“Donotthreatenmewithmyhusband.IfIcomeforyou,noonewillprotectyou.”Istraightened.“Besttobeginplanninghowyouwillfightyourownbattles,Safira.Ihaveafeelingyou’llneedit.”
Thewomanstoodthereamoment,chestheaving,andIhadthefleetingthoughtthatifshehadablade,shewouldgoformyheart,butIdidnotthinkshewasbraveenoughtogohead-to-headwithme—notaftershe’dseenmefightmyownpeople.
Shecurtsied,andIofferedacold,triumphantsmile.
“YourMajesty,”shesaidinpartingbeforesheturnedonherheels,curlsbouncing,andcutapaththroughcamp.
“Makingfriends?”
IturnedtofindSorinstandingbehindme,anamusedsmirkonhisface.
“Morelikemanagingexpectations,”Isaid.
“Safiraisjealous,”Sorinsaid,asifIcouldnotguess.“ThoughafterwhatIheardlastnight,evenIamjealous.”
Iraisedabrow,glaring.“Youwereacrosscamp.”
“Trustme,Iknow.”
“Sorin,”Iwarned.
“AllIamsayingisyourcriesofpleasurewereheardformiles.”
“DoesDarocpunishyouoftenforyourmouth?”
“Allthetime,”hesaidwithawink,andthensomeoneclearedtheirthroatbehindus.WeturnedandfoundDaroclooming.HeobviouslydidnotappreciatemyhumorasmuchasSorin.Adrian’ssecond-in-commandgavemeapointedlookbeforehisgazeslidtohislover.
“Sorin,KingAdrianhasajobforyou.”
“Goodafternoontoyou,”Sorinsaid,andthoughhewasbeingplayful,Daroc’seyeswidened,andhehesitated.
“I’msorry,”Darocmumbled.“Goodafternoon.”
Ilookedbetweenthem,thinkinghowodditwasthattheywerestillsoawkward…hundredsofyearslater.
Sorinrolledhiseyes.“Itis,thankyou.”Thenhelookedtomeashebowed.“Anothertime,myqueen.”
Sorinleft,andwhenmygazereturnedtoDaroc,hewasstaringatme,hislipspressedthin,ahardlinebetweenhisbrows.Igotthefeelinghedidnottrustme,andthatwasjustaswell,becauseIdidnottrusthim.
“AnynewsfromLara?”Iasked,wonderingwhathadtranspiredsinceCommanderKillianhadreturnedtoHighCitywithGavriel.IwasanxiousabouthowmyfatherwouldhandlethemassacreatVaidaandcouldnotdenythatIdreadedtherumorsthatwouldspread.Itwasinevitable,nomatterthetruth,thatvampireswouldbeblamed,andnormally,thatwouldnotbotherme,exceptnowitdid.AndithadnothingtodowithAdrian’skindnessesandeverythingtodowithhowmypeoplethoughtofmesincemymarriage.
Ihatedtoimagineanevengreaterdividebetweenmeandmypeople.
“None,”hesaid.“Perhapstoday.”
Darocexcusedhimself,andIturnedmyattentiontothesky.Aboveme,thecloudswerewhiteandwispy,buttendrilsofredbledthroughlikebloodinwater.Ifollowedthosethreadstothehorizon,wheretheshadesofredstainedthesky.Iwouldbebeneaththatskywithinhours,withinthebordersofRevekka,surroundedbyanenemywhosustainedtheirlivesbystealingmine.IdidnotknowthepoliticsofAdrian’scourt,didnotknowifvampirescouldeverrespectamortalqueen,butIwoulddomybesttosurvive.
No,notjustsurvive,Ithought.Conquer.
“Mourningthesun?”
IturnedtofindAdrianstandingbesideme.Ifoundhisquestionstrange,consideringthedirectionofmythoughts.
“Alittleless,”Iadmittedandthensaidsomethingthatevenshockedme.“Sinceyouseemtokeepyourpromises.”
IwasofferinghimasmuchasIcouldgive—akerneloftrustthatwasasvaluableasabladeinourworld—butalsoremindinghimofhisvow.
Hiseyesseemedtoglintatmycompliment,butIfrowned,wonderinghowlonguntilIwasleftfeelinglikeafoolformybeliefinamonster.
Adrianheldouthishand.
“Come,”hesaid.“Iameagertodepart.WewillbeinRevekkasoon.”
Takinghishandwaseasiernow.Hisfingersclosedaroundmine,andwhenhesettledbehindmeinthesaddle,awarmthbloomedinmychestthatflushedmyface.Iwasgladthatmybackwastohimsohecouldnotseehowhistouchwasaffectingme.Icouldhardlybeblamedwiththoughtsoflastnightfreshonmymind.EvennowasIrecalledourpassion,phantomthreadsofpleasuretwistedthroughmybody,andIshivered.
Adrian’shandcamearoundmystomach,andhepressedmetightagainsthim,hismouthnearmyear.
“AseagerasIamtobewithinmykingdom,Iwilldelayourprogressifyoucontinuetothinkthesethoughts.”
Iturnedmyheadslightly,hislipsclosetomine.
“AmIhearingthatyouarenotaseagerforme?”
Hisansweringchucklesentathrillthroughme,andthenhishandlowered,dippingbetweenmythighsashismouthclosedovermyshoulder,teethscrapingthroughmyclothing.
“Adrian.”Hisnameescapedbetweenmyteeth,andIinhaled.
“Yes,myqueen?”
“Whatareyoudoing?”
“Provingmyself,”heansweredandjerkedmyheadtowardhis,fingersdiggingintomyskinashepartedmylipswithhistongue.Hetastedcoldbutsweetashekissedmehungrilywhilecuppingmyheatwithhisotherhand.Itwasindecent.Itwascarnal.Itwaslust.Ididn’twantittoend,butasthatthoughtblossomedinmymind,hereleasedmeallatonce,andIwasleftdizzyandarousedasheurgedShadowforwardintothethickofthewoods,puttingdistancebetweenusandhisarmy,stillmakingourwaytowardRevekka.NowallIcouldfocusonwasthehollowfeelinginthepitofmystomach.MyfingerscurledintomypalmsasIthoughtofhowIwantedtobefullofhim.
“Holdontothatpassion,Sparrow.Iwillmakeyousingagain.”
Ididasheguidedmeagainsthim,myheadrestingonhisshoulder.Hedrewhiscloakaboutusandliftedmytunic,handdippingbeneathmyleggings,wherehisthumbbrushedmyclit.Iheavedasighthatshookmybones.
“Areyoualwaysthisinsatiable?”hewhisperedagainstmyear.
Iswallowedhardandansweredtruthfully—therewasnoreasontomerelythinkit.Hewouldhear,thoughIkepttheanswershort,clipped.Itslippedbetweenmyteethangrily.“Sinceyou,”Isaid.
Evenso,herewardedme,slidingintomewhilehisthumbteasedandcircled.ThecloserIcametorelease,theharderhebreathed,themorekisseshepeppereddownmyfaceandneck.Hestayeddeep,curlinginsideme,andasmymusclesclenchedaroundhim,hesiphonedpleasurefrommeuntilIcame.
Whenhewasfinished,hepressedakisstomytemple,anditsentastrangerushthroughme.Itwasthefirsttimehehadkissedmelikethat,butIfeltasifI’dbeenherebefore—heldbyhim,touchedbyhim,justlikethis.Itwasn’tjusttheaction,itwasthewayhehaddoneit—gentleandsure,asiftoaskareyouallright?
Ilingeredonthosethoughtsasweslowedourpacesothesoldiersandtheirvassalscouldrejoinus,andthenIfellasleepinhisarms.
Later,whenIwoke,wewerebeneaththeredsky.Fromadistance,italwayslookedoneshadeofred—acrimsoncolorthatremindedmeoffreshblood—butnowthatIwashere,Isawitforwhatitwas:shadesofredthatdeepenedeventoblack.Itfeltsoominous—arepresentationofthethreatvampireshadpresentedoverthelasttwohundredyears.Howelsehadthislandscapechangedovertime,Iwondered.Didtherainfallincrimsonsheets?Didtheriversrunred?
Behindme,Adrianchuckled.“Thatisridiculous,”hesaid.
Iglaredathimovermyshoulder.“Youlivebeneatharedskyandspreadplagueatwill.Howaremythoughtssoridiculous?”
Hedidnotrespond,andIsatupalittlestraighterinthesaddle.
Theskywasn’ttheonlypartofRevekkathathadanunnervingeffectonme.Allaroundusweretall,nakedtrees,andwhileitwaswinter,itwasevidentthateveninthespring,nothinggrewhere.Thebarkwasscorchedandblack,theearthatourfeetbarren,anditwaslikethatforasfarasIcouldsee.
Ihadneverfeltsouneasy,especiallyinnature,butthisplacefeltwrong,andtheonlywayIcouldthinktodescribeitwasthatsomethinghorriblehadhappenedhere.Icouldfeelit—aheavydreadthatwasjustaspresentastheclothesuponmybody.
“ThisistheStarlessForest,”Adriansaid.“Thetrees—theysprangfromblood.”
“Whathappenedhere?”Iasked.
“WitcheswerehungfromthesetreesduringKingDragos’sreign,”hesaid.
Ishivered.RevekkabelongedtoDragosovertwohundredyearsago—beforetheDarkEra—andhaddeclaredthatallwhopossessedmagicshouldburn.Mobsformed,huntsbegan,andpeoplewhothoughttheywouldneverkillweresuddenlyhappytomurderanyonetheysuspectedpossessedtheabilitytousemagic,evenwithoutproof.
ItwasthewillofAsha,Dragoshadsaid,todestroyevil.
“Doyouthinkyouwouldfeelsuchhorrorifthosewhodiedhereweretrulyevil?”Adrianasked,andIflinched,bothatthefactthathehadbeenlisteningtomythoughtsandbyhistone.
“Eventheworstofusfeardeath,”Isaid.
IwishedIcouldseeAdrian’sfaceasIspoke.Iwonderedifhefeareddeath,ordidhefeellikehisexistencewasalreadysomekindofend?Still,thiswasn’tjustthehorrorofthosewhohaddeservedit;itwasthehorroroftheinnocentswhohaddiedduringtheBurning.
“Iftheywerenotevil,”Isaidquietly,“whatwerethey?”
“Powerful,”hesaid.
“Isthatnotthewayofkings?Todestroythosewhowouldmakethemweak?”
“Itisthewayofcowards,”Adriansaid.
“Andyetyouattackthosewhohavenodefenseagainstyouronslaught.Whatdoesthatmakeyou?”
“Amonster,”hesaidwithouthesitation.
“Doyoureallybelievethat?”Iasked,curious.
Therewasadifferencebetweenamonsterandsomeonewhocouldbemonstrous.Asmuchasitfeltwrongtoconsiderit,IwonderedifIhadmistakenonefortheother.Onceagain,Iwastreadingintodangerousterritory.ThemomentIbegantoseethehumanityinAdrianwasthemomentItrulybetrayedmypeople.
“Icanbeanything.Yourjailor,yoursavior,yourlover.”Hismouthwasclosertomyearasheadded,“Yourmonster.”
WecontinuedinsilenceforafewmomentsasIturnedoverAdrian’swords.ThemoreIconsideredwhatI’dlearnedofthepast,themorequestionsIhad.
“Ifyourwitchesweresopowerful,whydidtheynotdefendthemselves?”
“Whatdoyouknowaboutwitches?”
Ihesitated.IknewwhatIhadbeentold.Wehadbeentaughttofearwitchessincewewereyoung.Quiet,Nadiawouldtellme,orthewitcheswillstealyouawayandgobbleyouwhole!AsIhadgottenolder,theyhadmorphedintosomethingfarmoreevil,theiratrocitiessharedviathehistoriestranscribedbyroyallibrariansandscholarsofCordova.Theydescribedagroupofwomenwhoconspiredtostarveandkillkingdoms,spellingkingstotaxandgotobattle,hopingthepeopleofCordovawouldturntothemforsupport.
Itwasatwistedroadtopower.
ButDragoshaddiscoveredtheirplanandcalledforthehunt.Theyearsfollowingwerefulloffireandafearofmagic.
“Noneofthatistrue,”Adriansaid.
“AndIamsupposedtobelieveyouoveralifetimeofhistory?”Ichallenged.
Ifelthimshrug.“Historyisjustperspective.Itchangesdependingonyourside.”
“Thentellmeyours.”
Hetookamomenttocontinue,andIwonderedwhatgavehimpause.Atlast,hespoke.“Twohundredyearsago,acovengovernedmagicinCordova.TheywerecalledHighCoven,andtheywerededicatedtoensuringthepracticeofmagicremainedpeaceful.Thesewitchesyouthinkofasevil,theyonlywantedtonurturehumanityandearth.
“Buttheirleadersawopportunitiestogrow,tocultivatepeace,sosheassignedawitchtoeachkingdom.Theywouldbeabridgebetweentheking,hispeople,andtheland.Theywerenevermeanttobeweapons,butthatwaswhatDragoswanted,andwhentheyrefused,hehadthem—andthousandsofinnocents—killed.Soyousee,yourheroisreallythevillain.”
“Nooneisthatgood,”Isaid,unwillingtobelievethatthewitcheshadmotivessopure.
“Nooneshouldbe.”
Iwasnotcompletelywillingtochangemymindaboutwitchesandwitchcraft,anditwasdifficulttobelievethatDragoswasn’tmerelydoingwhatAdrianwoulddoasaking.Hadhenotchosentoexecutemypeoplefortheirtreasontoo?
“Andyou?Whowereyouallthoseyearsago?”Iasked.
Adrianwishedtolecturemeonthepastbutneverbroughtuphisown,andIwantedtoknow—whohadhebeenbeforethecurse?
Ifelthisbodygorigidagainstmineasheanswered,“Adifferentperson.”
Wedidnotspeakafterthat,travelingonlyafewhoursmorebeforestoppingtocamp.AdrianbroughtapailofhotwaterfromanearbyspringthatIusedtofreshenup.OncewearrivedattheRedPalace,thefirstthingIwoulddowasorderahotbath.Mybodyandbonesdemandedit.
Sincewehadbeenontheroad,I’ddevelopedabitofaroutine,goingstraighttothetenttosleep,butasdawndrewnearer,Ifeltrestless.Isteppedoutside,scanningthegroundsforAdrian,whowasnowhereinsight.AfewfeetinfrontofmewasafirethevampireshadbuiltWhereSorinsattherewithIsacandMiha.Whentheysawme,theywavedmeover.
“Joinus,myqueen!”Sorinsaid,holdingupawoodencup.
Curious,Iapproachedbutkeptmydistance,notlikinghowclosetheysattothesparkingfireorthewaythewindblewtheflamesthiswayandthat.Perhapsitwasanirrationalfear,tocatchaflame,butitwasmyfearallthesame.
“Whatareyoudrinking?”Iasked.
“Mead,”hesaid.
“Isthatsomethingyouwillthrowuplater?”
Heshrugged.“We’llfindout.”
IsaclaughedandMiharolledhereyes.
“WhereisAdrian?”Iasked.
“Thekingisfeeding,”saidIsac.Hislonghairwaspulledintoaknotatthebackofhishead,andheloungedontheground,hisbackproppedupagainstarock.
Mymoodinstantlydarkenedatthenews.FeedingmeantthathewaswithSafira.
Mihapausedwhatshewasworkingon,whichlookedlikeacarvingofsomekind,andasked,“Haveyouneedofhim?Icanrelayamessage.”
“No,”Isaid,grittingmyteeth.IrealizedIcouldnotexpectAdriannottofeed,especiallywhenIwasunwillingtogivehimmyblood.Still,IcouldnotescapewhatI’dseeninthetent—thewayhehadheldher,howshehadclungtohim.Hismouth,hisskin,hisbody,itwasmine.IdidnotlikethatSafirafeltshewassomehowentitledtomyhusbandbecausehefedfromher.
IsatbesideSorinwithmybacktothefire.
“Ifitbothersyouthatmuch,justofferhimyourvein,”Sorinsaid.
Iglaredathim.“Thatwillneverhappen.”
Hegaveawrysmile,exchangingaglancewithbothIsacandMiha.Still,asIwatchedthem,IfoundIhadquestionsaboutthattoo.
“Tellmemoreaboutit,”Isaid.
“Whatdoyouwanttoknow?”Sorinasked.
“Idon’tknow.Bloodisyoursustenance,correct?Doeseveryonefeedfromvassals?”
“Noteveryone.Loversfeedfromeachother.”
Myfaceflushed.“Everyday?”
SorinandIsacchuckled,butMiharemainedquiet.
“Mostdays,”Isacanswered.“Butwefeelmostofourhungeraftersex.”
“Why?”
Isacshrugged.“Idon’tknow.Itisaneed,animpulse,andwhenwesatisfyit,itisliketherushyoufeelatthepeakofrelease.”
Nowmyskinfeltimpossiblyhot.IthoughtofallthetimesAdrianandIhadcometogether—hadheleftmysidetofeedonSafira?Orperhapshefedbeforetoensurehedidn’tbiteme.Eitherway,Ididnotlikethathewoulddoeither.
“Ifyouaretoliveamongus,youmustunderstandourbloodlust,”Sorinsaid.“Asmuchasitislife-sustaining,itisalsoabond.GrantingAdrianaccesstoyourbloodisthehighestshowoftrust.”
“Butitisyourchoice,”Mihaadded,lookingupmomentarilyfromherwork.
Mythroatfelttight.Allthistalkofloversandsexandblood,itmademefeelheatedandlight-headed.Still,hearingthewaySorinspokeofitwasdifferent.Itsoundedsacredtothem,whichmadethefactthatAdriantookfromSafiranightlyevenworse.
“And…howcanItrustitwillonlybebloodletting?”Iasked.
Sorin’sbrowslowered.“Whatdoyoumean?”
“Well,youbecameavampiresomehow,”Ipointedout.“Howwereyouturned?”
“That,”hesaid,“isadeeperbite.”
“Itisagreatinsulttohearanothermanteachhiswifeofbloodlust,”Adriansaid,suddenlyappearingfromthedarknessaroundus.
Myeyescollidedwithhis,andIrosetomyfeet.
“IaskedSorintoexplain,”Isaidquickly.“Wouldyouhavehimdenyhisqueen?”
Adrianglared,baringhisteethbeforeturningonhisheelsandenteringthetent.Iofferedaquick,apologeticglancetoSorinandtheothersbeforefollowingAdrianinside,stumblingwhenhetwistedtowardmesuddenly,hiseyesalight.
“Youshouldhaveaskedme,”hesaid,jamminghisfingerathisownchest.“Iwouldhavetoldyou.Iwantedtotellyou.”
Istared,shockedbyhowstronglyhewasreactingtothis.
“WasIsupposedtoassumebloodsuckingwasasacredprocesswhenyoufeedfromanyonewithaheartbeat?”
“Idonotfeedfromjustanyone,”hesaid.
“Forgiveme,”Imocked.“Youfeedfromyourvassal,whofeelsresponsibleforyourpleasure.Youexpectmetobelieveinasanctityofsomethingyoualsooffertoher?”
“Itisnotthesame,”hesaid.
“Youfuckheranddrainherblood.Howisitnotthesame?”
“Ihaveneverfuckedher,”hesnarled.
Ifeltlikemychestwasgoingtoexplode.Afteramomentofquiet,hetiltedhisheadback,whichmadetheshadowsdarkenthehollowsofhischeeks.
“IfIweretopartakeofyourblood,Iwouldhavenouseforher,”hesaid.Hewasattackingmyjealousy,asiftosaythewaytoendthisistogivemeeverything
“Andifyoufuckedher,youwouldhavenouseforme,”Isaid.
“Yousaythatasifyouwouldnotmind,”hesaid,closingthespacebetweenus
Ishouldn’t,buthealreadyknewIcared.Bythefuckinggoddess.WhydidIcare?
“ThinkofhowItouchedyoulastnight.”Hetrailedhisfingersdownmyface.“Imagineanotherwomaninyourplace.”
Igrippedhiswristtokeephimfromcontinuinghisexploration,butIdidnotpullawayfromhistouch.
“Idon’twanttocare,”Isaid.Iwasdesperatenottocare,evenasresentmentbuiltinsideme—towardAdrian,towardSafira.
“Youdonothavetobeembarrassedbyyourdesire,evenifitisforme.Sexisaprimalneed.Youhaveeveryrighttosatisfyit.”
Athisstatement,IwonderedwhenI’ddepartedfrommyoriginalideaofwhatsexwassupposedtobelikebetweenus.Itwasmeanttobeapassionaterelease,notanemotionalinvestment,andhereIwas,fightingjealousyoverallofit,eventhebloodletting.
Westoodchesttochest,myheadbentbacksothatIcouldmeethisgaze,andIwasn’tsureIlikedwhostaredback—amanwithgentleeyesandasoftexpression,amanwholongedforaconnectionIcouldnotgive.
Hispalmpressedtomycheek;hislipshoverednearmine.“Oneday,Iwillmakelovetoyou,andIlookforwardtothatday.”
“Areyouadreamer,YourMajesty?”Iwhispered.
Asmallsmilecurledhislips.“No,”hesaid,hisbreathcaressingmymouth.“Iamaconqueror.”
ThenAdriankissedme,liftingmeoffmyfeetasheguidedmylegsaroundhiswaist.Itwinedmyfingersinhishairandpriedmyselffreetolookintohisstrange,hungryeyes.
“IwantyoutostopfeedingfromSafira,”Isaid.“Findanothervassal.”
Iexpectedhimtoargue,buthedidn’t.Hisgriptightenedonme,hiserectionpressinghardagainstme.
“Iwilldoasyouwish,”hesaidandthenconsumedme.Eleven
WewouldarriveattheRedPalacetoday.
Mythoughtswerechaotic,andIwasconfused.I’dspentthelastthreenightsonajourneytomynewhusband’shome,andIknewlittlemoreabouthimthanwhenI’dleftLara.Nooneseemedtobewillingtogiveupinformation—notaboutthemselvesorhim.Evenaskingabouttheirpowersseemedtobeatopicthatwasoff-limits.Thesepeopledidnotwanttohaveweaknesses.
Despitedreadingmyarrivalatmynewhome,IwaseagertoputdistancebetweenmyselfandAdrian.IshouldbeencouraginghisbetrayalsothatIwouldfeeljustifiedinrunning.Instead,I’ddemandedhefindanothervassalformysake.Iwastooinvested,whichIattributedtothefactthatwehadbeentogethernonstopsinceourencounterinthewoods.Atthepalace,AdrianwouldneedtoattendtohisownagendawhileIcouldconsidermyfuture,processthebetrayalofmypeople,anddecidehowIwassupposedtoruleakingdomofmonsters—ordestroyit.
“Youarequiettoday,”Sorinsaid,comingupalongsideme.
Istoodjustoutsidemytent,closeenoughtowhatremainedofthefiretostaywarm.Theeveningwascolderthanalltherest,andIwasnotlookingforwardtoridinginthischill.
“Well,Iamabouttoenteradenofwolves,”Isaid.
“We’renotthatbad.”
Iglared.
“Okay,maybeweare,butitisn’tanythingyoucannothandle.”
“WhatdoyouknowaboutwhatIcanhandle?”Iasked.
Soringaveabreathylaugh,hisdimplesdeepened.“Ihaveonlyneededtospendafewdayswithyoutoknowyouwillsurviveourcourt.”
Ihopedhewasright.
IwentinsearchofAdrianandfoundhimbesideShadow.Heheldthereinsofanewhorse;thisonewaswhite.IhesitatedasIapproached,wonderingwhytherewassuddenlyanotherhorseavailableformetoride.
“ThisisSnow,”Adriansaid.“IthoughtyoumightliketorideintoCelCerediuponher.”
CelCerediwaslikeHighCityinLara—itwasthetownthathadformedaroundthepalace.
ItookSnow’sreins.“Whodidshebelongto?”Iasked.
Adrianstared,andIcouldtellhedidnotwanttoanswermyquestion.
“Herriderwasamortal,”hefinallysaid.“Whodiedlastnight.”
Ipaled,andanumberofpossibilitiesranthroughmyhead—liketheyhadbeendrainedoftoomuchblood—butAdrianwasquicktoshutthosethoughtsdown.
“Shewanderedawayfromcampandwasattackedbyawight,”Adriansaid.
“Awight?”
ItwasacreatureIhadnotheardofbefore,butIwascertaintherewereseveralmonstersIhadyettoencounter,especiallyinRevekka.
“Itisacreaturebornofdeath.Theyareattractedtolife—tothebeatofyourheart.”
Istaredathimforamoment,myeyesshiftingtohischestasIfoughttheinclinationtopressmyhandtowherehishearthadoncebeat.AsmuchasIwanteddistancefrommynewhusband,Ididnotlikewhatwasformingbetweenusnow.Itwasnothostilitysomuchasuncertainty.IhadalwaysbeensureaboutmyhatredforAdrian,butthesenewfeelings…hisconcernforme…scaredme.
“Mountup!”hecalledthen,andthecampjumpedintoaction.
WemadeourwaythroughwhatremainedoftheStarlessForest,andaswenearedtheedge,Ifeltitsgripleavingme,onefingeratatime.IthoughtofwhatAdrianhadsaidaboutthewitcheswhohaddiedthereanddidnotrealizehowheavyofaburdenitwastoexistbeneaththatcanopyuntilIwasoutsideitandcouldbreatheagain.
MygazeshiftedtoAdrian.HerodeafewpacesaheadbesideDaroc.Helookedjustasominousastheredskyoverhead—apowerfulmanwithalonghistory,andIwantedtoknowwhathadmadehim.Howhadthehistoryhefeltsopassionatelyabout—Dragos,thewitches,theBurning—shapedhimintotheBloodKing?
OnceIwasattheRedPalace,Iwouldfindout.
ThelandscapeofRevekkawasmuchlikeLara—rollingplains,mostlytreelesswiththeexceptionofafewclusteredpines.Beneaththesky,everythingwastingedinaredhuevaryingfrompinktocrimson.Itwasbeautifulbutstrange,andIwonderedhowlonguntilIgrewtiredofit.
“Wearecominguponthefirstvillagenow,”saidSorin,drawinghishorsebesidemine.“ItiscalledSadovea.”
“Wholivesthere?”Iasked.Iwasn’tsureaboutthepopulationofRevekka.Whatwastheratioofhumanstovampires?
“Revekkians,”hesaid.
“Aretheyhumanorvampire?”
“Youreallydon’tknowmuchaboutus,doyou?”
Ididnothonorhisquestionwitharesponsesinceitseemedtobeobvioustohim.
“Adrianonlyallowsaselectfewtheprivilegeofbecomingavampire,”saidSorin.Itriednottocringeathisuseofthewordprivilege.“Thosewhogorogueandattackorchangeotherswithouthispermissionaredestroyed.”
Destroyedwasnotanexaggerationwhenitcametovampires.Theywerehardtokill,buthearingitfromSorinsoundedfarmoreominous.
“Whatarehiscriteria?”Iasked.
“YoumustbeusefultoAdrianifheistograntyourchange,”Sorinsaid.“Peoplepetitionhimoftenwhenheholdscourt.You’dbesurprisedbytheiroffers.”
Iwasintrigued,butmorecuriousaboutSorin.
“Whywereyouchosen?”
Hesmiledsoftly,andthoughhedidnotlookatme,Iknewitwassad,whichmademewanthisanswerevenmore.
Butwhenhelookedatme,hesurprisedmebysaying,“BecauseIamuseful.”
“Younevergivestraightanswers,”Isaid.“Why?Areyouafraidtobehonestwithme?”
“Iamnotafraid,butyouarenotreadytohearwhatIhavetosay.”
“IwouldnothaveaskedifIweren’tready.”
Heshookhishead.“Thatisalie,”hesaid.“Youstillbelievewearemonsters.”
“And?”
NothingSorinhadtotellmeabouthispastwouldconvincemeotherwise.
“Yourhumansarefarmorecruel,Isolde.Youhavenoonetoblameforourexistencebutyourselves.Ifearthedayyoucometoknowit.”
Iblinkedathim,confusedbyhiswords,butbeforeIcouldsayanything,ahorrifiedscreamerupted.Mywholebodyfelttheshockofit.AfamiliarroutineplayedoutinfrontofmeasAdrianturnedtolookformebeforedisappearingaroundabendintheroadwithDaroc.
Iexpectedtobetoldtohalt,butinstead,mytriocreatedaperimeteraroundme—SorinandIsactomyleftandright,andMihabehindme.
“Come,”Sorinsaid,andwematchedAdrianandDaroc’spaceasweheadedtowardthesoundofthescreaming.Thepathaheadwidenedandturnedfromadirtlaneintoastonebridge.Beyondthecreekwasavillage.Pointedroofsandchimneysmokebillowedfromoverawallthatencircledthetown,butthatwaswherethequaintnessendedasamanracedfromaheavymist,throughtheopendoorsofthegate,terrified.Whenhisfeetcouldnolongercarryhim,hewenttohisknees,andwhenthosewouldnotwork,hefell,facedown,anddidnotmoveagain.Ididnotneedtoapproachtoknowthathewasdeadorthathehaddiedfromwhatevermagichadkilledmypeople,becausehisskinlookedasifithadbeeneatenawayasifhewerefreshlyskinned.
Silencefell,andthenSorinsaid,“WelcometoSadovea.”
AfewofAdrian’ssoldiersenteredthevillagefirst,returningtoreportthatwhateverhadattackedseemedtobegone.After,Adriangavetheordertosearchforthedead.Hewaitedatthegate,andasIapproached,heplacedhishanduponmyforearm,haltingme.
“Canyouhandlethis?”heasked,hiseyessearchingmine.
“I’llbefine.”
Iknewhemeantwell,buthisquestionmademefeelweak.No,Ihadn’tbeenabletolookuponmyownpeople,butIhadalsobeeninshock.Iknewwhattoexpectnow,sothiswouldbeeasier…Ihoped.
Besides,IwantedtohelpinwhateverwayIcould.
Insidethewallsofthevillage,IdismountedasthevampiresbegantokickindoorsanddragoutbodiesthatlookedjustliketheonesfoundinVaida.Iwandereddownasidestreet,pastastorefront,atavernandinn,andwhatIsuspectedwerehouses,thoughtheylookeddifferentfromtheonesinLara.Theseweremadefromslatsofpine,notwattle,whichwasaweavemadeoftwigs,andtheroofswerecoveredinclaytiles,notthatch.
Thebodiesinthestreetweredressedwarmlyandcontortedinawaythatmademethinkthey’dbeenfleeingfromwhateverhadattacked.Ipaused,staringdownattheformofayoungwoman.Herhairwasdarklikemine,andherhandwascurledbeneathherheadasifshehadmerelyfallenasleep.Iwonderedwhathernamewas,ifhermotherandfatherlived,orweretheyhereamongthedead?
Mygazeshiftedtomyleft,andIsawsomeonestaringbackfrominsideahome.Awomanwithlong,ginger-coloredhairandsharpeyes.
Asurvivor,Ithought,butIblinked,andshewasgone.Confused,Iapproachedandlookedthroughadirtywindowintoakitchen,butIdidnotseethewoman,onlythebodiesofamotherandtwochildren.Ibackedawayfromthehouse,aneeriefeelingcreptalongmyspine.
AsIdid,Inoticedmovementinthecornerofmyeyeandcaughtsightofabare,dirtyfootassomeonefleddownanadjoiningalleyway.
“Wait!”Icalledandbegantofollow.
Iturnedthecornerandsawasmallgirlahead.Sheturnedtostarewithwide,blueeyes.Herfacewasdirty,herhairapaleyellow.Shewasdressedinapairofleggings,atunic,andathickwoolenscarf.
“Icanhelpyou,”Isaid,butshetookoffoncemore.
Thistime,whenIcamearoundthenextcurve,Isawnosignofwhereshe’dgone,butIcontinued,thinkingthatperhapsIcoulddrawheroutofhiding.
“Hello?”Icalled.“Iknowyouarehere.Please,letmehelpyou.”
Ipassedseveralquiethomesandshops,allofwhichhadbeenbuiltsidebyside.Therewereafewpeopleintheroad,allskinless,alldead.IdrewmycloaktighteraroundmeasIpassedthem.IfIhadnotseenthisinLara,Iwouldhaveassumedsomekindofplaguehadtakenthem,butforsomanytodieatonce?Itwasliketheirentiretownhadbeenblanketedbydeath.
Acreakdrewmyattention,andItwistedtofindthedoorofanapothecaryshopajar.Pushingitopen,Idiscoveredthegirlcoweringinthecorner,shaking.
“Hi,”IsaidquietlyasIsteppedintotheshop.“MynameisIsolde.”
Thegirlcontinuedtoshiver.
“I’mnotgoingtohurtyou,”Isaid,standinginthedoorway.“Areyouhurt?”
Thegirlshookherhead.
“Canyoutalk?”
Thegirlsaidnothing,justremainedsilent.
“Didyouseewhatattackedyourvillage?”
Thegirlnodded,andIinchedtowardher.
“Canyoutellmewhatitwas?”
Sheshookherhead.Ididnotknowifthatwasbecauseshedidnotwanttotalkorbecauseshetrulydidnotknow.Itwouldmakesense,consideringsheseemedtobetheonlyonewhowasalive.
“And…areyouparents…doyouknowwheretheyare?”
Ididnotwanttoaskiftheyweredead.Sheshookherhead.
“It’snotsafehere,”Itoldthegirl.NowIstoodinfrontofher.“Willyounotcomewithme?”
Ibentandheldoutmyhand,hopingshewouldtakeit.Shestaredatmeforalongmomentbeforereachingout,hersmallhandtouchingmine—andthengripping.Iwasshockedbyherstrength,andwhenmygazereturnedtohers,hereyeshadbecomered,herlipshadpeeledbacktoshowjaggedteeth,andshegaveahorriblecry.
Iwrenchedmyhandawayandstumbledbackintoshelvesofglassjars.Thesmellofpineandmintfilledtheairastheycrackedandshatteredbeneathmyweight.Thegirlbellowedandchargedatmeonallfours.Ibarelyhadtimetodrawmyknife,butbeforeshecouldreachme,somethingcaughtherinmidjumpandflungheracrosstheroom.ShelandedasIhad—againstawallofjars.Thecrashofshatteringglasscouldn’toverpowerherangryscreamsassherosefromtherubbleandglared,bodyheavingwithangerasshefacedDaroc,whonowstoodinfrontofme.
Shehissed,baringteeththatdidnotresembleahuman’s,andchargedonceagain.Darocmovedquickly,anditwasasifhewereteleporting—onemoment,hewasinfrontofthecreature,thenextbehind,hishandsoneithersideofherhead.Aquicksnapandshewasdead,herwideeyesmeetingmineasshefelltoherknees,nolongerthemonstershewasmomentsagobutagirlagain.
Darocloweredhertothegroundandthenlookedatme.
“Areyouallright,myqueen?”heasked.
IcouldnotanswerbecauseIcouldnotsay.Mybodyhurt,myarmburnedwherethegirlhadreachedforme,andIhadjustwatchedDarockillacreaturethatlookedlikeagirl.Herosetohisfeetandyankedacurtainpanelfromthewindow,usingittocoverher.
“Whathappenedtoher?”Iasked.Icouldn’ttakemyeyesoffherlimpbody.
“Hardtosay,”hesaid.“WewillhavetotakehertotheRedPalaceforanautopsy.”
Darocapproached,helpingmetomyfeet,thoughmylegswereshaking.
“You’reinjured,”hesaid,eyesfallingtomyhand.Ilookedtoo,findingthattherewasaburnonmyskinintheshapeofahand.
“Oh,”Isaidandswallowed.“Itdoesn’thurt…notreally.”
Hefrowned.“Come.”
IfollowedDarocoutoftheapothecaryandthroughthemazeofbuildings.Asweemerged,Adrianturnedtowardmeandfrowned,hisstrangeeyesbrilliantagainstthegloomoftheday.Hestartedtowardus,andwhenhecameuponme,hishandscuppedmyface.
“You’repale.Whathappened?”
“Shefound…something,”Darocsaid.“Ahuman…possessedbysomekindofmagic.”
Adrian’sseveregazeshiftedfromDaroctome.“Shelookedlikeagirl,”Isaid,andmymouthbegantoquiver.“Alittlegirl.”
Ihadwatchedherdie.
“Sheisinjured,”Darocsaid.“Herhand.”
Adrian’seyesfelltomyarm,whichIwasnowcradlingwithmyotherhand.Hefrownedashestudiedthewound.
“Thecreaturedidthistoyou?”
“Withonlyatouch,”Iconfirmed,staringatthewoundalmostblindly.Myskinlookedmuchlikethatofthedead—redandraw.
Adrianreachedforme,andIlethimtakemyhandasheexaminedit.Iexpectedhimtotryandhealit.Instead,hesaid,“Icannothealthis.Itismagic.”
HelookedatDaroc,worryetchedacrosshissevereface.
“WewillbeattheRedPalacesoon,”Darocsaid.“AnaMariacanlookatit.”
IdidnotknowwhoAnaMariawas,butIwonderedwhatshecoulddothatAdriancouldn’t.Still,hisjawtightened,butIwasnotsomuchworriedaboutmyinjuryasIwasaboutwhathadhappenedhere.
“Idon’tunderstand.Wasthatgirlresponsiblefor…allthis?”
“Nother,butwhateverpossessedher,”Adriansaid.HelookedatDarocagain,offeringawordlesscommandbeforethevampirebowedanddeparted,returninginthedirectionwe’dcometoretrievethecorpseofthegirl,ifIhadtoguess.
AlonewithAdrian,hetiltedmyfacetowardhis,andIgottheimpressionhewastryingtoensurethatwhateverhadconsumedthegirlhadnotconsumedme,butasIstaredintohiseyes,Icouldnothelpseeinghers,widewiththeshockofdeath.Iclosedmyownagainsttheimageandasked,“Whowoulddothis?”
WhenAdriandidnotanswer,Iopenedmyeyesagaintofindhimstaringoffintothedistance,hisjawsettight.
“Adrian?”
Atthesoundofhisname,helookedatme.
“It’shardtosay,”hereplied.
“Butyouhaveanidea,don’tyou?”
Suddenly,allAdrian’stalkofgoodwitchesandgentlemagicseemedlikeatrick.Ifawitch’smagiccouldcreatesomethinglikethis,howcoulditeverhavebeengood?
“Anythingcanbeevilinthewronghands,Sparrow.”
Asthevampiresgatheredbodiestoburn,anothervampiretendedtomyarm.Ihadseenhimaroundcampbutneveraskedhisname.Istaredathimnow,ahandsomemanwithsharpcheekbonesanddarkskinandeyes.Hishairwasthickandbraided,hishandsgentleasheboundmyburnedarm.
“What’syourname?”Iasked.
“Euric,”hesaid.
“Areyouahealer?”
“No,”hesaid.“Atleastnotinthesamecapacityastheyoncewere.”
“Whatdoyoumean?”
“Atruehealercanmendbytouch,”hesaid.“Yourpeoplecalledthemwitchesandhadthemburned.”
“Theyhealedbytouch.Thatismagic.”
“Itisamiracle,notmagic,”hesaid.“Thinkofallthewaysyoucannotfightus.Nowthinkifyouhadhealers,atleastyoucouldfightourplagues.”
Istaredathim,consideringhiswords,andthoughtofwhatAdrianhadsaidyesterday—thathistorywasallamatterofperspective.
Euricrosetohisfeetandbowed.
“Myqueen,”hesaidbeforedeparting.
IwatchedhimgoanddidnotmoveuntilIsawSorin,Daroc,andIsaclighttorchestoburnthecorpses.IrosetomyfeetandheadedforSnow.AsIreachedforherreins,Adrianstoppedme.
“Iwon’tallowyoutoridealone,”hesaid.“Yourpainwillworsen,anditwillmakeforadifficultride.Iwillnothaveyouinjuringyourselffurther.”
“Okay.”
Ididnotargue,becauseIwasalreadyinpain,andIdidnotreallywishtomakeitworse.Thetensioninhisbrowseasedatmyagreement,andwemountedShadowwhiletheothersfollowedsuit.
IdidnotthinkIwasimaginingthewayAdrianenvelopedme.Histhighspressedintomine,andoneofhisarmswrappedaroundmywaist.Duringtheride,hislipstrailedmyneck,dustingkissesacrossmyskin.Ifoundmyselfholdingmybreathaseachonelingeredlongerthanthelast.
“Whatareyoudoing?”Iasked,myvoicebreathless,betrayingwhathisactionsweredoingtomybody.
“Distractingyou,”hesaid.
Itwasworking.Iwaswarm,mystomachwasknotted,butthelongerwerode,thelessAdrian’sdistractionworked,andthepaininmyarmwasbeginningtogivemeaheadache.Coupledwiththeride,Ifeltsick.
“We’llbehomesoon,”hesaidagainstmyear.
Thosewordshelpedmerelax,andIleanedagainsthisshoulder,myheadtooheavytoholdup.
Itwasn’tuntilIsawatownthatIsatupstraighter.Wepassedthroughanopenwoodengate,andbeforeus,awindingroadmadeaslowinclineupthesideofahill,throughalargemarkettown,toacastlethatloomed,bothterrifyingandbeautiful.Thewallofthecastleseemedtospanformiles,aseriesofgrandarches.Behinditrosethestrongholditself,aclusteroftallandpointedtowers,eachcarvedwithfine,floraldetails.Attimes,thecastleitselfappearedtobeblack,butwhenthelightshonejustrightuponitsglassysurface,Icouldseeadeepredgleamedfromwithin.
“WelcometotheRedPalace,”Adriansaid.
Hecontinuedthroughthetown,andashemadehiswayalongthepath,villagersemergedtowatchourprocession.Somewavedfromwindowswhileothersthrewflowers,wheat,orcoinsintotheroadatourhorse’sfeet.Itwasafarbetterwelcomethanthesend-offI’dhadathome,andthethoughthurtmyheart.
“Weretheyorderedtodothis?”Iasked,havingnotexpectedthis.
“Doyoureallythinksopoorlyofme?”
Itwasn’tthat.ItwasthatIhadexpectedtofindthatRevekkianswerenohappiertobeundertheruleoftheBloodKingthanLara.
“Itakecareofmypeople,”hesaid.“JustasIwilltakecareofyourpeople.”
“WereyouRevekkian?”Iasked.“Beforeyouwerecursed?”
“IamRevekkian,”hesaidandadded,“AndIamnotcursed.”
Hiscommentmademyheartbeatharderinmychest,andIhadthethoughtthatifhewasnotacursetobebroken,whatwashe?Howhadhebecomethis?
Adriandidnotspeakandcontinuedonthroughthevalley,upasteepinclinetotheRedPalace.Aswecametothegate—alargeonewithblackironbars—IrealizedIcouldnotseethewallthatsurroundedthepalaceforallthetrees.Onceinsidethegate,Adrianroderightuptoasetofwidestairs.Thesewereblack,unlikethewallsofthecastle,andacrowdhadalreadygathereduponthem.
Hedismountedandheldhishandoutforme.Iaccepted,tiredofthepainthathadatfirstonlybeeninmyarmbutwasnowreverberatingthroughoutmybody.Despitethis,Ipulledmyselftogetherandwatchedasamanapproached.Hewasolder,hishairlinerecedingalmosttothemiddleofhishead,andyethekeptthishairlong.Heworedark-bluerobes,embroideredwithsilver,andunlikemanyofthevampiresI’dencountered,hisskinwaspaper-thinandcreased.
“YourMajesty,”hesaid.
“Tanaka,”Adrianacknowledged.
ThemanlookedasifhewereabouttospeakwhenAdriansteppedpasthim,pullingmealongsidehim.Thecrowdparted.UnlikeTanaka,theyseemedtoknowhewasnotinthemoodtochat.
“Whowasthatman?”Iasked.
“Heismyviceroy,”Adriansaidandleftitatthat.
Weenteredthepalacethroughasetoflarge,woodendoorsandwereimmediatelygreetedbyagrandstaircase,heavilyembellishedwithornatecarvingsoftheoldgoddessesIknewfromourmyths—Rae,thegoddessofsunandstars,andYara,thegoddessofforestandtruth,andKismet,thegoddessoffateandfortune—whowerenolongerworshippedbytheworldatlarge.IwonderedifAdrianhadworshippedthemtwohundredyearsago,backwhenthewholeofCordovahadmultiplegoddessesinsteadofjusttwo.
Thewallsandceilingsofthecastlewerethesamedeepred,intricatelycutwithsweepingdesigns—vaultedceilings,interlacedarches,highandpointedwindows.IfthewindowswereinLara,theywouldhaveallowedforthehallstobefilledwithlight,butbecausetheywereinRevekka,astrangehazyredloomedoutside.
“Come.IwilltakeyoutoyourroomsandsendforAna,”Adriansaid.
Ididnotargue.Myheadwaspounding,andmyarmstillburnedfromthegirl’stouch.Wetookthestepsslowly,andjustasIwasabouttocommentonAdrian’spatience,hepausedonthestepandshiftedtowardme.
“Letmecarryyou,”hesaid.
“ThatishardlytheintroductionIneedtoyourpeople.”
ItwouldbehardenoughtobehumaninacastlefullofvampireswithoutAdrianencouragingthemtoseemeasweak.
“Theywillnotthinkyouareweak,”hesaid.
Buthedidnotaskagain,andwecontinued,crestingthestairs,headingtoourleftwhereanothersetofstairsledintoadarkerhallway.Mysuitewasattheveryend.Itwaslarge,withafour-posterbed,velvetcoverletsandcurtains,andplushrugscoveringeveryinchofcoldstone.Iwasgladthatthefireplacefeltsofarawayfromthebed,asitcontainedahealthyfire.
IexpectedAdriantoleavemeatthedoor,butinstead,hefollowedmeinside.
“Anawillneedthefirewhenshelooksatyourwound.After,itwillnotgetaboveanember,Ipromise.”
“Thankyou.”
“Youwillrestaftersheleaves.”
Iarchedabrowathiscommand,thoughmybodysoftenedatthethoughtofsleepinarealbed.
“Youmustbewellenoughtoattendtonight’sfestivities,”headdedinresponsetomyquestioningstare.
“Whatishappeningtonight?”
“Wearecelebratingmyreturnandourmarriage,”hesaid.“Itwillbeyourfirstintroductiontomypeople,andwhileIknowyouarenoteagertomeetthem,I’msurewecanbothagreethatfirstimpressionsareeverything.”
“Youdonotcountourrushedentrancetothecastleasafirstimpression?”Iasked.
Hesmiledthen.“IthinkmypeoplewillassumeIwasmoreeagertobealonewithyou.”
“Exceptthatyouaredepositingmeinaroomandleavingotherstocareforme.”
Iwasn’tsurewhyIsaidthat,andAdrian’sbrowsdrewtogetheroversimmeringeyes.
“Missingmealready?”hesaid,amusementinhistoneashetiltedmyheadupward,hishandsplayedacrossmyneckasifhewishedtofeelmypulseasIspoke.
“Hardly,”Isaid,clenchingmyjawandavertingmyeyes.
Helaughed,unfazedbymycurtreply.“Thiswouldbeeasierifyouwouldadmitthat,againstyourbetterjudgment,youlikeme.”
“Thiswouldbeeasierifyouwouldadmitthattheonlyreasonweremotelygetalongisbecauseofwhatourbodiesdotogether,nothingmore.”
Hestaredatmeforalongmoment,unmoving.Hisfacewasneartomine,lipshoveringclose,hishandaroundmyneck,hisfingerstightening,agentlesqueezethathadmypulseracingagainsthisskin.
“AllthishateforwhatIam,”hesaid.“WouldyoufeelthesameifIwerehumanlikeyourcommander?”
Iglared.“Youwouldstillbetheenemy.”
“YoudonotevenknowwhyIamyourenemy,”hesaid.
“Youareathreattohumankind,”Icountered.“Youhavekilledkingsandconqueredcountries!Noone,notthestrongestamongus,standsachanceagainstyou.”
“SuchaspeechandyetallIhearisyourfearofsomethingnotlikeyou.”
“Donotreducemyhatredofyoutodifference!Youaremorethandifferent.Youburnedwholevillages,spreadplague,andkilledhundreds.Youareaspineless,murderous—”
Adriansteppedcloserandgrippedmyhead,hishandtighteninginmyhair,hisbodyflushwithmine.Iwasnotcertainofhisintentions,evenashebenthisheadtomine,evenashisbreathcaressedmylips,becausehiseyesglintedwithasharp,frustratedanger.
“IknowwhatIam,”hesaid,voicequiet.“Canyousaythesame?”
Once.
Icouldhavesaidthatonce,aweekago,whenIhadbeenIsolde,princessofLara.ThatwasuntilImetAdrian,andfromthatfirstencounterinthewoods,ithadbecomeclearIhadneverreallyknownmyselfatall.
“Youcallthistreason,”Adrianwhispered,hisfingerstrailingdownmyface,asoft,carefulcaress.“Butthis—us—isbeyondchoice.”
“You’reright,”Ireplied,andthoughIknewhewastalkingaboutsomethingthatwentfardeeperbetweenus,Iignoreditandspokethroughmyteeth.“Ididn’thaveachoice.”
Hereleasedme,andIhadtoadmit,thedistanceheplacedbetweenuspulledheavilyatmyheart.Maybeitwasbecauseofhisexpression,whichseemedbothpainedanddefeated.
“Ihavemuchtoattendto,”hesaidandturnedtoleave.Atthedoors,hepaused.“Iexpectyouwillbeeagertoexplorethecastle,butdonotdosoonyourown.Youwillfindthosewhoresideherearenotaseasilyrestrained,andI’dhatetohavetomurdermycouncilforturningyoubeforeIhavethechance.”
Withthat,Adrianwasgone.Twelve
OnceAdrianleft,mylegsgaveoutandIsanktothebed.
Turningme?
Wehadtalkedalotaboutbloodletting,buttheonlytimehehadmentionedturningwasintheformofathreat.
Ithinkyouwanttokillme,andifthatisthecase,Ishouldwarnyounowthatanyattemptwillbemetwithmywrath.
Sofar,hehadnotupheldhiswarning.Now,Iwonderedifhewouldtrulyturnmewithoutmyconsent,orifheassumedIwouldbegforit,muchlikehe’dassumedI’dbeghimtopartakeofmyblood.
Exhaustionsettledheavilyonmyshoulders.Adrianhadstolenmyenergy.Everyencounterwithhimhadmeonedge,mywholebodytwistedandknotted,waitingforhisnextmove—wouldwefightorfuck?WouldIalwaysfeelsotornbetweenhimandmypeople?AsIsathereuponthisregalbed,somuchmoreextravagantthantheoneinmysmallbedroominLara,IrealizedIhadnotthoughtmuchbeyondmyarrivalattheRedPalace,asidefromhowIwoulddefeatAdrian.AndwhileIwasstilldedicatedtothatmission,IwasbeginningtothinkthatIneededtoconsiderhowIwouldreign.
PerhapsthemoreIembracedmyrole,themorewillingAdrianwouldbetoopenupabouthispast—apastIhopedunlockedthekeytosomekindofweakness.
Aknockdrewmyattentionandwasfollowedbyavoice.
“Myqueen,itisAnaMaria.Adriansentmetoattendtoyou.”
Irosetomyfeetandopenedthedoor,mygazecollidingwithapairofstrikingeyes,fringedbythicklashes.Theywerethecolorofasummersky,herhairwasthickandalmostsilvery,herlipsplumpandpink.AnaMariawasbeautiful,andIwasmomentarilytakenabackbyit.SheworeanemeraldgownthatremindedmeofLara,ofthespringwhenthetreeswerebloomingandthesunwasbright,andsuddenly,Iwashomesick.
Icouldonlyguessatwhatthewomanwasthinking,butasshestaredatme,sheseemedjustasstunnedbyme,thoughIdoubteditwasbecauseofmybeauty.Therewasaflashinhereyes,somethingakintodisappointment,andthesmileshe’dpreparedformefaltered.Iwonderedifshehadexpectedsomeonedifferent,andwhatsortofinvestmentshehadinwhatAdrian’swifelookedlike?Perhapsshehadnotexpectedsomeoneofislanddescent.
Tohercredit,shequicklyrecovered.“Myqueen,”shesaidagainandbowed.“Iheardyouwereinjured.”
“Yes,comein,”Isaid,steppingasidetoletherenter.Iworriedoncethedoorwasclosedthatthingsbetweenuswouldbecomeawkward.Iwasnotfamiliarwiththisspaceorhowtoentertain,andtheonlychairswerenearthefire—whichIwasnotgoingtoapproach—butonceAnaMariawasinside,sheasked,“MayIseeyourarm?”
Iextendedittowardher,andshepeeledbackthedressingsEurichadwrapped.Asthebandagecamefree,itfeltlikeanotherlayerofmyskinwasbeingremoved,andIinhaledsharply.
AnaMariafrowned.Thewoundlookedfarmoreirritatedthanithadearlier.
“Adriancouldnothealit,”Isaid.“Hesaiditwasbecauseofmagic.Doyouknowwhy?”
Sheglancedatmeandthensaid,“Wedonotevenknowwhyheisabletohealatall.”
Thatsurprisedme.I’dthoughtallvampirescouldhealothers,butitappearedonlytheBloodKinghadthatgift.“Ifhecannotfixthis,howwillyou?”Iasked.
“Istudiedmedicine.”
“Oh,”Isaid,feelingsilly,andmyfaceflushed.
Sheofferedasmallsmileandcrossedtheroomtowardthehearth.“Ihopeyoudon’tmind.Itookthelibertyofsettingupbeforeyouarrived.”
“No,ofcoursenot,”Isaid.ThenIhesitated.“HowdidyouknowIwasinjured?”
“AdriansentSorinahead,”sheanswered.
Ihadn’tevennoticed.IrealizedIhadnoideahowquicklyvampirescouldactuallytravelwithouttheburdenofmortals.TheclosestI’dcometowitnessingtheirspeedwaswhenDarochadkilledthe…girl.Iflinchedatthethought,recallinghowswifthisactionshadbeen.Howhumanshe’dlookedindeath.
AnaMariahungacastironteapotoverthefireandarrangedhersupplies.IadmiredhowcomfortableshewasnearitasIkeptmydistance,choosingtositonthebed.
“HowwelldoyouknowAdrian?”
Shelaughed—asoundthatmademychestfeelwarm.“Wellenough.Heismycousin.”
“Your…cousin?”Iasked,surprised,thoughnowthatIthoughtaboutit,theydidlookalike.IhadnotthoughtaboutAdrianhavingfamily.“Didhe…turnyou?”
“Hedid,”AnaMariaansweredbutofferednothingelse.
“Isit…rudetoask?”
“Forsome,itis,”sheexplained.“Itdependsonthecircumstancesbywhichtheywereturned.Theoldestamongusdidnothaveachoice.Wewerenot…incontrolthen.”
Iswallowedthickly,understanding.
“And…Adrian.Didhehaveachoice?”
AnaMariadidnotanswerasshetooktheteapotfromthefire,settingituponacastirontrivet.Finally,shemetmygaze.“Isupposeitdependsonwhoyouask,”shesaid.
Sheplacedafewherbsintoameshbag,soakingitinthehotwaterbeforeplacingituponmyskin.Itsmelledlikepeppermintandwintergreen,andoncetheheatofthewaterworeoff,itbegantocoolandsoothe.Whilethemedicinetookeffect,AnaMariamadeacupofteawithafewofthesuppliesinherbags.Asshepouredwateroverthemixture,astrong,mintysmellwaftedtowardme.
Iwrinkledmynose.
“Itiswillowbark,”shesaid.“Itwillhelpwithyourpain.”
Iwasskepticalbutencouragedbyhowgoodmyarmwasfeeling.Afterafewsips,Isetitaside.
“IdonotknowwhyIamhere,”Isaidalmostabsently.
“YouareherebecauseAdrianwantedyou,”AnaMariasaid.
“Butwhy?”Iasked,meetinghereyes.“Hecouldhavehadanyone,takenanyoneelse.”
Hecouldhavewedhisvassal,andnoonewouldhavethoughttwice,becausehedidnotneedauniontoconquer.
AnaMarialookedatme,andasshedid,sheslidherpalmstogether.“You’rewrong,”shesaid,andhervoiceshook,butnotfromnerves.Sheseemedalmostfrustratedwithme.“Itcouldhaveonlybeenyou.Thereisnooneelse.”
Istared,confused,bothbyherreactionandherwords.Thenshetookadeepbreathandswallowed,andIthoughtshewastryingtoholdbacktears.
“Iapologize,YourMajesty.Ispokeoutofturn,”shesaid.“Youshouldrest.Yourlady-in-waitingwillbealongshortlytohelpyougetreadyfortonight’sfeast.”
Shecurtsiedandpracticallyfled.
Howstrange,IthoughtasIfellheavilyuponthecoversofmybed.IdidnotrealizeIhadclosedmyeyesuntilIwasrousedbyaknockatthedoor.
“YourMajesty?ItisVioleta.Ihavecometohelpyougetreadyfortonight.”
Irosefromthesurprisingwarmthofthebed,stillgroggy,andmademywaytothedoorwhereIfoundayoungwomanwaiting.Shewasshortandthin,herlimbspalewhiteandherhairadullbrown.Shehaddelicatefeatures—roundeyes,asmallnose,andthinlips.Theonlycolorinherfacewashercheeks,whichwererosy.Ididnotknowifitwasanaturaltint,thecold,orperhapsshewasnervoustomeetme.
“You’rehuman,”Isaid,surprised.
Herblushdeepened,andshebowedherhead,turningthemovementintoacurtsy.
“Yes,”shesaid.“KingAdrianhasappointedmeasyourlady-in-waiting.Healsoadvisedyouwouldwantabath.”
Myeyesshiftedtoseeasetofservantsbehindherholdingalargecoppertub.
“Yes,thankyou,”Isaid,steppingaside.
Violetahesitated,probablyatmyexpressionofgratitude,butsheenteredtheroom,instructingtheservantstoplacethetubbeforethefire.
“Notthere,”Isaid.
Violetaandtheservantshalted,staringatmeinsurprise.
“Canyouplaceitnearthewindow,”Isaid,andbecauseIfeltlikeIneededtoofferanexplanationforwhy,Iadded,“I’dliketolookattheviewwhileIbathe.”
Ididnotevenknowwhatwasoutsidetheseleadedwindows,butanythingwasbetterthanbeingnearfire.
Violetadidnothesitate.“Ofcourse,myqueen,”shesaid.
Afterafewtripsbackandforthbytheservants,thetubwasfullofsteamingwater.
Ishedmyclothesandenteredthebath,groaningwithreliefasIrelaxedagainsttheedgeandclosedmyeyes.Afteramoment,asensualandrichscentfilledtheair.IlookedatVioleta,whofroze,armsuspendedoverthewaterasshedroppedsomethingintomywater.
“Whatisthat?”Iasked.
“J-jasmine,”sheanswered.“LadyAnaMariasaiditwouldrelaxyou.I’msorry.Ishouldhaveasked—”
“No,it’s…fine.”
Ihadonlyaskedbecausethesmellwasfamiliar,andyetIcouldnotpinpointwhy.IwatchedasVioletafinishedaddingthedropsandthenreachedforacloth.
“Ifyou’dlike,Icanscrubyourbackandyourhair.”
Ilether,andwhenIwasfinished,Istoodfromthebath,happytofeelclean.Itoweledoff,andVioletahelpedmeintoasilkrobe.Iexpectedhertoaskmetositbythefirewhileshebrushedmyhairtohelpitdry,butinstead,shewaitedbythevanity—anornatepieceofgoldfurniturewithanovalmirror.
Violetadidnotseemoverlyconcernedthatmyhairwouldbewetforthefeast.Shebrushedit,leavingitslicktomyhead,andwhenshewasfinished,sheasked,“Whatwouldyouliketoweartonight?”
Shewalkedacrosstheroomtoawardrobeandthrewopenthedoorstorevealasetofgorgeousdresses.Iroseslowlyandapproached,reachingtotouchoneoftheplushskirts.
“Whodidthesebelongto?”Iasked.
“KingAdrianhadthemcommissionedaheadofyourarrival,”sheexplained.
Thatfeltstrange.Still,IcouldnotdenythatIwaspleased.
“They’reallsobeautiful,”Isaid.
“ShallIchooseforyou?”Violetaoffered.Ilookedather,andshehesitated.“If,thatis,youarehavingahardtimechoosing.”
Ismiledather.“Ofcourse.”
Shegrinnedandthenreachedforaredgown,clearlyhavingalreadydecidedwhatIshouldwear.Thereweresomanylayerstotheskirt,ittooksometimetogetitovermyhead,andthelacesatthebackofthebodicehadmeregrettinglettingherpick,untilIturnedtofacethemirror.
Thegownwasbeautiful,anditaccentuatedeverylushcurveofmybody—fromthenecklinethatcutlowbetweenmybreaststotheskirtthatflaredatmyhipsanddustedthefloor.Thelongsleeves,thoughlace,stillallowedmetoholstermyknives,whichwasacomforttome.DespitenothavinganytroublewithAdrian’sarmyonthewaytoRevekka,Ididnottrustthecastleatlarge—andneitherdidAdrian,orhewouldn’thavewarnedmenottoleavemyroomalone.
“Yourjewelry,YourMajesty,”Violetasaid.Sheapproachedwithawoodenboxlinedwithredvelvet.Insidewasapairofdanglinggoldandrubyearringsandamatchingnecklace.TheywerefarmoreextravagantthananythingI’deverowned,evenbeingprincessofLara.Itriedtoignorethefactthatoncetheywereon,theyremindedmeofblood.Still,staringatmyselfinthemirror,IhardlyrecognizethewomanI’dbeenaweekago.
AknockatthedoorannouncedAnaMaria’sreturn.Shehadchangedandwasnowwearingablackgownwithahalternecklinethatmadeherhairlooklikeaglowinghalo.Herskirtwasfull,craftedfromlayersoftulle,anditsweptthefloorasshemoved.
“Oh,myqueen,youlookbeautiful.”
“Thankyou,AnaMaria,”Isaid.
“JustAna,”shesaidandheldoutasmallbox.“Ibroughtyousomething.AgiftfromAdrian.”
MybrowsloweredasItookit.“Canhenotgiveittomehimself?”
“Ithink,perhaps,hewantstobesurprisedwhenhelooksuponyoutonight.”
Itwasironicconsideringhowhehadvisitedmeonourweddingday.Still,thatwasbetterthanmyreasoning.Ihadthoughthewasavoidingmeafterourearlierconversation.ExceptthatsinceI’dmettheBloodKing,he’drarelyavoidedconfrontingmeaboutanything.
Insidetheboxwasatiara.Itwasstunningand,whilesimpleinappearance,heavilyembellishedwithdiamondsoneachfringe.
“Doyoulikeit?”Anaasked.
“Ofcourse,”Isaid,andasIplacedituponmyhead,Ifeltthatitbelongedthere.
“Adrianwillnotlookaway,”saidAna.
“Isupposethatdependsonwhetherornothisfavoritevassalisthere,”Isaid.IimaginedSafirawouldbepresentdespitethefactthatI’daskedAdriannottodrinkfromher.
Anagavemeanoddlook.
“YoudonotknowAdrianverywell,”shesaid.
“Youareright.Idon’t.”
Anafrowned,andforthefirsttimesinceImether,Iconsideredthatperhapsshehadexpectedmetobehappyaboutthismarriage.
“Areyouready?”sheasked.“Ishallescortyoutothegreathall.”
IsupposedIwasasreadyasIwouldeverbe,thoughIhatedhowmystomachroiled.Ididnotwanttofearmyenemy,andyet,Icouldnothelpfeelingapprehensive.Thiswasdifferentfrommywedding,differentevenfromthesmallarmyI’dtraveledtoRevekkawith.IwasabouttobesurroundedbyAdrian’sentirekingdom.
Iwasasparrowinadenofwolves.
Weleftmynewsuite.Violetastayedbehindwithinstructionsnottotendtothefire.IhopedbythetimeIreturnedtomyroomtonight,itwouldbenothingmorethanburningemberslikeAdrianhadpromised.
UnlikeCastleFiora,thehallwaysoftheRedPalacewerewarmerandwider,whichmeantthatAnaandIcouldwalksidebysidecomfortably.NowthatIfeltbetter,Icouldappreciatethedecorofthecastle—blacksconcesdrippingwithcrystals,tippedwithtaperedcandles,largelandscapesframedinthick,goldframes,andlavish,wovencarpets.IwonderedhowmuchofitAdrianhadchangedsincehehadkilledDragos.
Andhowmuchofithehadscavengedfromconqueredvillages.
Asweascendedthestairs,Icouldseetheentrancetotheballroom—gildeddoorsopenedwide,inviting.
“Whatisexpectedofmetonight?”IaskedAna.
“YouandAdrianwilldance,”shesaid.“Andafter,youwillstayclosetohim.”
“Perfect,”IsaidandtookabreathwhichIheldthecloserwedrewtothehall.Ishalldotheopposite.
Theroomwascrowded,fulloflaughterandrevelry.Humansfeastedonfoodfromatablewhilevampirespulledthosesamehumansasidetodrinkfromtheirveins.Therewasdancinganddrinkingandmusic,andaboveitall,elevateduponaprecipice,wasAdrian,wholoungeduponhisthrone,lookingexceptionallyboreduntilhiseyesfoundmeandheld,touchingeverypartofme.Hestraightened,andthemovementdrewattention—firsttohimandthentome.Suddenly,thechaoticcelebrationended,andasgazesturnedtome,thecrowdpartedandthenbowed,creatingapathformestraighttoAdrian.
ButmyeyeshadshiftedtoSafira,wholingerednearhisthrone,dressedinpowderblueandsilver.Ihadneverseenthemlikethissidebyside,anditoccurredtomehowrighttheylookedtogether.Herexpressionwastense,hereyesandmouthpinched,andIwonderedifAdrianhadspokenwithheraboutnolongerfeedingfromher.Still,whydidshelinger?Whywassheinaplacethatelevatedherabovetherest?NotevenTanaka,theviceroy,lingereduponthedaiswiththeking.
Ididnotfollowthepathmadeforme.Instead,Iturnedaway,sweepingthecrowd,myeyesnarrowinguponawaiflikehuman.
“You,”Isaid,turningtowardhim.
Hiseyeswidened.“M-me?”
“Come,”Isaid.
Hehesitated.
“Donotmakemeaskagain,”Isaid.
Histhroatbopped,butheobeyedandapproached.
Thesilenceintheroompressedagainstmyears,andIfeltAdrian’sgazegrowingfiercerasthehumanapproachedme.
“YourMajesty,”hesaid,bowing.
“Dancewithme,”Isaid.
“YourMajesty,Ireallymustde—”
“Itwasnotaquestion,”Isaid.
Ididnotthinkitwaspossibleforhimtogrowanypaler,buthedid.Iliftedmyhandforhimtotake.
“Youmaytouchme,”IsaidandhappenedtoglanceatAdrian,wholookedmurderous.Irefrainedfromsmiling,butitwasmorethanapleasuretostrokehisfury.
Theman’shandwascoldandclammyashetookmyown.
“What’syourname?”Iasked.
“Lothian,”hesaid.
“Lothian,”Irepeatedhisname.“Donottremble.Itisembarrassing.”
“Apologies,myqueen.It’sjustthatIhadnotplannedonlosingmyballstonight.”
Ilaughed.“Yourballshavemyprotection,Lothian.Now,atleastactlikeyouenjoymypresence.”
Themusicbegan—apainfullyboringsongthatmademydancewithLothiantedious.Itwaspunishment,Iwascertain,fordisobeyingrules,soinstead,Itriedtofocusonthemortalatarm’slength.
“Whatdoyoudo,Lothian?”Iasked,determinedtoenjoymytimeenragingAdrian.
“YourMajesty?”heasked,confused.
“Yourtrade.Whatisyourjobhere?”
“Iamalibrarian,”hesaid.
“Alibrarian.”Ismiled.Ithoughthewouldsayhewasavassal.“Willyoutakemeonatour?”
“Ofcourse,”hesaid,suddenlysoundingmuchmoreconfident.“Anyparticularareaofinterest?”
“Oh,allofit.Iamavoraciousreader.”
“Iwilldomyverybesttopleaseyou,”hesaid,grinning,andIdecidedthatIverymuchlikedexcitableLothian.
“Verygood.Let’sstartthisweek,”Isaid,unsureofwhatAdrianmighthaveplannedforme.“Iameagertolearnthehistoryofmynewhome.”
Asoursongcametoanend,Lothianbowed.
“Ofcourse,YourMajesty,”hesaid.“Youwillnotbedisappointed!”
Hespunandpracticallyfloatedoffthedancefloor.Nowthatmydancewascomplete,Ihopedtogoinsearchofwine,orsomethingtofurtheraidinmyenjoymentoftheevening,butwhenIturned,mywaywasblockedbyalargeman.Hehadlong,darkhairandapointedbeard.Therewassomethingabouthimthatmademefeeluneasy,andthatonlyworsenedwhenhesmiled.
“YourMajesty,”hesaidashebowed,extendinghishand.“Adance?”
“Iwouldratherhaveadrink,”Isaidandwalkedpasthim.IfNadiawerehere,shewouldlectureme.
Aladyneverdeclinesagentleman!
WhatisthepointinbeingaprincessifIcannotshunmen?
Thepointistosetanexample!
Ihadsetanexample,justnottheoneshewanted.
Ahandlandedonmyshoulder.Itstartledme,andIjumped,turningtofindthatthedark-hairedvampirehadfollowedme.
“Donottouchme,”Isaid.EachwordIutteredsoundedlikeathreat.
Thevampirechuckled.“Adrianhasfoundhimselfalivelymortal,”hesaid,hiseyestrailingmybody.Againhesaid,“Dancewithme.”
Myeyesnarrowedupontheman.Hiswereglazedanddistant,andIwonderedwhathehadbeenconsumingbeforearrivingatthisevent.
“Soyouareoneofthose,”Isaid.
“Oneofwhat?”heasked.
“Amanwhodoesnotlisten,”Isaid.
Hisslicksmilespread,andhetookastepclosertome.“PerhapsIshouldintroducemyself.IamNoblesseZakharov.”
“Well,NoblesseZakharov,Idon’tcarewhoyouare.Iwillnotdancewithyou.”
Ididnotlingertohearhisreaction,turningtoleave,butZakharovonceagainreachedforme,hisfingersdiggingintomyarmashejerkedmearound.Thistime,Idrewmyknifeholsteredatmywrist.Itwistedthehiltinmyhandandbroughtitdownintothehollowoftheman’scollarbone.
Theonlysoundhemadewasachokedgurgleashefelltohisknees,bloodoozingfromhiswound.Vampiresmightbeabletohealthemselves,buttheystillfeltpain,anditwaspossiblethiswasworse,giventhatIdidnotthinkZakharovthoughtIwouldfightback.Theroomwentquiet,andnonemovedasIstoodoppositethevampirewhohadaccostedme.
Thetapofbootsuponthemarblefloorinterruptedthesilence,andslowly,apathwasmadeforAdrian.Heseemedtotowerovereveryone,aforcethatcommandedattention.Hecertainlyhadmineasheapproached,hisfeaturesacoolmaskofindifference.
“Hetouchedme,”Iexplained.
Adrian’seyesleftmine,fallingtoZakharov,whosehandwasaroundthehiltofmydagger,bloodseepingfrombetweenhisfingers.Butjustashewasabletopullitout,hiseyesliftedtowardAdrian.
“M-mylord,”hemanaged.
Adriansaidnothingashepluckedtheknifefromhisflesh,wipeditfreeofbloodwithahandkerchiefhepulledfromtheinsideofhisjacket,andreturnedittome.
“Thankyou,”Iwhispered,andheofferedthesoftestsmilebeforedrawingabladesheathedathisguard’ssideandswung.NoonespokeasZakharov’sheadrolledacrosstheballroomfloor,hisbodylefttofallagainstthemarblewithawetthud.
Adrianreturnedthebloodiedbladetohisguardandthenlookedatme,offeringhishand.OnceItookit,hespoke,addressingthegathering.
“Yourqueenisawarriorfirst,anoblesecond.Isuggestyoukeepthatinmindifyoudecidetoplaceyourfateinherhands.”Thenhelookedatme.“Andif,bychance,shesparesyou,Iwillnot.”
Iheldhisgazeandfeltthepromiseofhiswordsshudderthroughme.
“Cleanthisup,”hesaidandledmeawayfromthebody.Pausingatthecenteroftheroom,hebrushedastrandofhairfrommyface.“Areyouallright?”
“Iam,”Isaid.“Whatisanoblesse?”
“Itisatitlethatmeansroyalbirth,”hesaid.“Zakharovhasalwaysbeenaproblem.Nowheisnot.”
Ilookedtowherehehadlain,hisbodyalreadycleared.Anothervampirecarriedtheheadbyitslong,blackhairtowardtheexit.
“Dancewithme,”Adriansaid.
Ibowedmyhead,acceptinghisinvitation.Hesmiledandliftedmyhandtohismouth.Hislipstouchedmyknuckles,asoftcaressthatremindedmeofthekisseshe’dofferedonourridethroughCelCereditotheRedPalace.Thenhedrewmecloseandbegantomove,hisbodyasolidguideIfollowedeffortlesslyaroundtheroom.
“Youarebeautiful,”hesaid,hiseyeslowered,lingeringonmybreasts.
“Ithoughtyouwoulddisapprove,”Isaid,butI’donlythoughtthatbecauseKillianwouldhavechidedmefortheamountofskinIwasshowing.
Adrian,though,seemedtolikeit.
“Myfeelingsarefarfromdisapproving,”hesaid,andasiftodrivethepointhome,hedrewmecloser,thehardswellofhiscockpressingintomystomach.
Iheldhisgaze,afireignitinginthepitofmystomach.
“Youarenotangrywithme?”
“WhywouldIbeangry?”
“BecauseIdancedwithLothian,”Isaid.“WhenIwassupposedtodancewithyou.”
“Hmm,”hesaid,understanding.“YouareluckyIlikehim.”
“Ipromisedtoprotecthisballs,”Isaid.
“Suddenly,Ilikehimless,”Adriansaid.
“Iamangrywithyou,”Isaid.
Adrianraisedabrow.“AsifIcouldnotguessbyyouractions.Safira?”
“Yousaidyouwouldceasefeedingfromher.”
“Ihave,”hesaid.
Therewasapauseaswecontinuedtodance,slowandcontrolled,theskirtofmydressswayingandtanglingaroundmylegsandAdrian’s.
“IhadonlytoldherafewmomentsbeforeIenteredthegreathall.Poortiming,perhaps,butitisdone.Asyouwished.”
Ibristled.“Donotguiltme.”
“Itisnotmyintention,”hesaid.“Iwoulddoanythingyouaskedifitmeantyoumightseemeasmorethanamonster.”
Icouldnotquiteisolatehowhiswordsmademefeel,butitwassomethingakintoshock.
“SoyoudancedwithLothianbecauseofSafira?”heasked.
Ishrugged.“Idon’tlikebeingtoldwhattodo.”
Acruelsmilespreadacrosshisface.“Ithinkyouwantedtodrivememad.”
“Diditwork?”
“Itmademewanttofuckyou,”hesaid.“Righthereinfrontofmykingdom.”
“Howprimalofyou,”Isaid,thoughhiswordsopenedachasminthebottomofmystomachthatburnedhotterthananyflame.
Hedidnotdenyit.“Primal,possessive,”hesaid.“Itisinmynature.”
Itwasinmynaturetoo.IcouldfeeliteverytimeIthoughtofAdrian’svassal.
Atleastwecouldbehonestwitheachother.
“Youwoulddowelltorememberit,”hesaid.
“Orwhat?”Ichallenged.
Adriankissedme.
Therewasnothinggentleaboutit.Hegraspedmyheadinbothhandsashebentoverme,partingmylips.Iclungtohim,meetingthethrustsofhistonguewithmyown,feelingbothdesperateandreckless.Ourbodiesweresoclose,ourfingersdiggingintoeachother’sskin.Iwantedhim,tobestretchedbyhim,filledwithhim,possessedbyhim,andIhopedhecouldheareverysinglethought
Adriangrowledandreleasedmymouth,gleamingeyesmeetingmine.Butbeforehecouldfulfillmywish,myeyesslippedfromhimoverhisshoulder,tothedoorswhereaman—avampire—entered,flankedbytwoothers.Inhishand,hegrippedtheheadofZakharov.
Adrianturnedtofacethenewcomers.
“Iwillhavevengeance,KingAdrian,forthedeathofmyson.”
Itriednottoreacttothepresenceofthenewcomer,butmyheartwasracing,andIgrippedAdrian’sarmalittletighter.Heheldmeclose,ahandonmywaist,lipsstillgleamingfromourkiss.AsIlookedupathim,heseemedunconcerned.
“Yoursonaccostedmywife,yourqueen,NoblesseGesalac,”hesaid.“Andforthat,hewaspunished.Itisyourchoicetokillhimnow.Burnhimornot,itisforyoutodecide.”
“Thatisnochoiceatall,”Gesalacsnapped.
Itwasn’t.Ifvampirebodieswerenotburnedafterdecapitation,theywouldreanimate,notastheywerebeforebutasrevenants—essentiallyvampireswithnohumanity.Theyattackedhumansandanimalsalike,thirstingendlesslyforblood.Wehadlearnedthisatayoungageduringtraining,butithadneveroccurredtomethatvampiresalsopracticedthis,mostlybecauseIhadneverimaginedtheyhadanysortofjusticesystem.
“Thenyouhaveyouranswer,”Adriansaid.
Gesalacthrewhisson’sheadatourfeet.Itrolled,landingwithhishalf-openedeyesfacingme.
“Youriskmyallegianceforawoman—amortaloneatthat?”
“Carefulofyourwords,Noblesse,”Adriansaid.“Nooneisirreplaceable.”
“Thatalsogoesforyou,myking,”Gesalacreplied.
TherewasamomentoftensesilencewhenIwasn’tsureGesalacwouldleave,buthebowedhisheadandleftwithhismen.
Thecelebrationresumed,andIgotthefeelingthatthiswasn’tanunusualoccurrence.IliftedmydresstokeepthehemoutoftheblooddrainingfromZakharov’sheadandusedmyfoottorollitaway,unnervedbyhowhiseyeswatchedme.
Adrianstaredatme,andIknewthatlookwellenough.HewasaskingifIwasokay,andIshrugged.
“Itwouldn’tbeaballifIdidn’tmakeenemies.”
ShortlyafterGesalac’sdeparture,avampireretrievedhisson’sheadandannouncedthathisbodywasbeingburnedinthecourtyardifanyonewantedtowatch.Astheballroomemptied,Darocappeared,hisexpressionaharshmask.Heapproachedusandbowed.
“YourMajesties,”hesaid.“IhaveheardfromGavriel.”
Myheartraced.
“Hastherebeenanotherattack?”Iquicklyasked,feardrainingthebloodfrommyface.
“Ofsorts,”hesaid.“Agroupofyourpeopleattemptedacoup.Theystormedthecastlebutgotnofartherthanthecourtyard.Yourfatherissafe,andnoliveswerelost.”
“Acoup?Why,becausemyfathersurrenderedtoAdrian?”
“That,”hesaid,“andtheybelievetheattackatVaidawasus.”
Iwasnotsomuchsurprisedasdisappointed,butIcouldnotsaythatIblamedmypeoplefortheirassumption.Theyhadnotseenthebodies;alltheyknewwasthatnowawholevillagehadbeenwipedoutandtheirremainsburned—apracticeagainstourcustoms.Itlookedlikeacover-up.
IlookedtoAdrianasheasked,“Whatwouldyouhavemedo?Icouldsendguardsforyourfather.”
“Ithinkthatwillonlymakethesituationworse,”Isaid.
“Perhaps,butifitmeansyourfatherissafe,doesitmatter?”
Itdidn’t.
“Gavrielandhismenareasgoodastenofmyfather’smen,”Isaid,anditwasbecominghardertotrustthoseclosesttohimatall.AtleastIknewAdrian’ssoldierswerebeholdentomethroughourmarriage.Icringedatthedirectionofmythoughtsbuthadmorethanenoughreasontothinkthem.
Adriangraspedmychin,brushinghisthumbacrossmylips.Itwasn’tuntilthenthatIrealizedI’dbeenworryingitwithmyteeth.
“Justaskitofme,”hesaid.
Finally,Irelented.“Sendyourbestmen,”Isaid.“Andsendmorebeforehetravelshereforthecoronation.”
“Itwillbedone.”
AndIbelievedhim.
Ihadto.
BecauseIwasn’tcertainIwouldsurviveifsomethinghappenedtomyfather.
***
Violetawaswaitingtohelpmeundress.
Shehadtakenthelibertyofpreparinganotherbath.Ithankedheranddismissedher,wantingtobealone.Sheleftatablenearbywithsoap,washcloths,andthejasmineoil.Iaddedafewdrops,hopingthesmellwouldeasetheachethathadformedattheforefrontofmyheadwherewordsandthoughtsandemotionswerebuilding.IfeltlikeIwasontheprecipiceofbreakingbutnotquitethere.Somethingheavyhadnestledwithinmychest,andapressurehadbuiltbehindmyeyesthatthreatenedtears,andyetIdidnotweep.
Iloweredmyselfintothetub,restedmyheadagainsttheedge,andclosedmyeyes.
Acoolbreezerousedme,andIfoundmyselfinadarklake,butallaroundmewerewillowsandtreeswithwhiteflowersthatsmelledlikethejasmineoilthatwasinmybathwater.Themoonlightbathedmynakedskininsilver,andthewaterwascool.ThoughIwasnolongerinmyroom,thisplacewasfamiliar.
Itwasn’tlonguntilIfeltthepresenceofanotherbehindme,andIturnedtofindAdrianstandingontheshore.Hewatchedme,staringwithafamiliarhungerinhiseyes.Isensedthatsomethingwasdifferentabouthim,thoughIdidnotknowexactlywhat.Ittuggedattheedgeofmymind,amemorytoofartograsp.
“Youlookedbeautifultonight,”hesaid.
“Looked?”Iasked,raisingabrow.
Hesmiled,anditwassobeautiful,itstolemybreath.Ihadneverseenhimsmilelikethis,andIwantedtoseeitmore.Still,thelongerIlooked,themoretroubledIbecame.Therewassomethingdifferentabouthisexpression—somethingfarmorelighthearted.HedidnothavethesharpnesstohisfaceIhadcometoknowwellorthedepthtohisstrangeeyes.
Heenteredthewater,fullyclothed,andplacedhishanduponmycheek.
“Yes,”hesaid,andhishandslidtomyneck.“Rightnow,youareradiant.”
Hislipscrashedagainstmine,andIsighedintohismouth.Myarmsslidaroundhiswaist,andIsankagainsthim,comfortedbyhispresence.
“I’vemissedyou,”Ifoundmyselfsayingashismouthleftminetokissalongmyneck.“Youweregonesolong.”
Ididnotunderstandthewordspouringfrommymouthortheircontext,butIspokethemandIfeltthemsoharshly,ithurt.
“I’msorry,”hesaid.“Neveragain.”
ButIknewthatwasalie.Still,Ihoped.
Idrewaway,mynakedfleshpressedagainsthisclothedbody.Icouldnotwaittofeelhimagainstme,skintoskin.Tohavehiminsideme,andyetIcouldnotshakethisstrangefearthatsomeonemightcatchusheretogether.Itgrippedmyheartandthreadedalongmyspine.
“Promise,”Isaid—begged.
Adrian’sbrowsknittedtogether,hishandsslidingtomyfaceoncemore.“Didsomethinghappeninmyabsence?”
Tearsprickedmyeyesathisquestion,andtohidethem,Ikissedhim.“No,”Iwhisperedagainsthismouthandmyhandsdrifteddowntopullhissexfreefromhistrousers.Asheliftedmeintohisarms,Ispoke.“Justpromiseme…”
ButbeforeIcouldevenfinishmysentence,heanswered.
“Ipromise,”hesaidashisfleshpartedmineandheslidinsideme.
IgaspedandopenedmyeyesasIwasliftedfromthewater.Adrian’sfacehoveredovermine.Foramoment,IthoughtIwasstillinthelake,butthefirelightreflectedoffhisface,harsherinthislightthanithadbeenbeneaththemoon
Ihadbeendreaming.
“Youwillcatchyourdeath,”hesaid,thenotesofhisvoicerumblinginmychest.
“Iwasjusttired,”Iwhispered.
Icouldn’tstoplookingathimandthinkingabouthowdifferenthewasinmydream.ThatAdrianhadlookedsoyoung,socarefree,soinlove.TheAdrianwhoheldmenowcarriedhisagewithinhiseyes,whichwereburdenedbyheartbreak,andIwonderedifthatwaswhathadmadethismanamonster.
“Youaresoaked,”Isaid.
“Isthatyourwayofaskingmetodisrobe?”
“Itwouldbewarmer,”Ireplied,andhesettledmeuponthebedbeforestraightening.Mybodygrewheatedunderhisgaze,mynipplestaut.Ifeltveryawareofmyownemptiness,ofthewetnessgatheringbetweenmythighs.
Adriandiscardedhisclothing.Hismovementsweregraceful,andaseachpartofhisbodybecameexposedtothelight,myhungergrew.
Iswallowedthickly.“Thankyouforprotectingmyfather,”Isaid.
“Imadeapromise,”hesaidsimply.
“Haveyoualwayskeptyourpromises?”Iasked.Iwascuriousabouthisresponse,givenmydream.
Thelastpieceofhisclothingfelltotheground,andhestoodnakedbesidethebed,meetingmygazeasheanswered.
“No.”
Hishandssankintothemattressoneithersideofmyfaceashestraddledmybody,leaningtopressasoftkisstomylips.Therewasaneaseandcomfortabilitytohismovements,asifwehadbeenloversforalifetime.
Hedrewbackandspoke,lowandrough.“Butforyou,Iwilldoanything.”
Itwasthesecondtimehehadspokenlikethistonight.
MybrowsdrewtogetherasIstudiedhim.Thecrownofhiscocktouchedmystomach,andthefeelofhimcradledbetweenourbodiesmademefeelhollowinside.Iwasrestless,andasmuchasIwantedtodrawhiminsidemethen,Iresisted.“ButIamyourenemy.”
Hiswhite-blueeyeswereshadowedashesearchedmyface,fingersbrushingafewstrandsofhairfrommycheek.
“Youwerenevermyenemy,”herepliedandpressedhislipstomine.Mybreathcaughtinmythroat,andIsighedintohismouthasIopenedforhim,mylegsrisingtoframehisbody.Myfingersdugintohisbacksothathishardchestwaspressedintomine,andwhenhistongueslippedpastmylips,tanglingwithmyown,Iarchedintohim.Therewasaspicetothesweetnessofhismouththattoldmehehaddrunkwinetonight.Iusuallydidnotenjoythetaste,butthisIwantedtosiphon.Hisstrokeswereslow,savoring,evenashelefttokissmyjaw,myneck,andbetweenmybreasts.Hesettledbackonhisheelsandpressedakisstotheinsideofmyknee,anotherhigherup,anotheragainstmyhip,andIletmybreathoutinarush,myfingerstwiningintothesheets.Itwassheeranticipation,andheletitbuildasheriddledmyskinwithkisses.
Itwistedbeneathhim,desperatetofeelthereleasethatwouldcomewithhismouthonmyswollenclitandhisfingersdeepinsideme.Instead,hishandscamedownuponmylegs,pressingmykneesintothebed.Theopenairteasedmyheat,andIfeltmanicandfrustratedashelingeredthere,soclosetomycenter.
Thenhiseyesfelltothenestofcurlsattheapexofmythighs.
“Sofuckingbeautiful,”hesaid,andhedippedhisheadtolickmyclit.Myheadrolledbackashecaresseditagainbeforedippingintomyslickheat.
“Yes,”Ibreathed,andAdrianchuckled,increasingthepressureofhistongue.Whenheaddedhisfingers,Ivaultedoffthebed,myshoulderspressedintothemattress,myhipssurgingforwardintohisthrustingfingers.Adrianmoanedatmyreaction,andhismouthclosedovermysensitivenerves,suckingandteasinguntilthesoundscomingoutofmymouthwerenolongerwithinmycontrol.Ihadgivenmyselfovertohim,aweapontobewielded.Hekeptpressureonme,keptdrivinginside,buildingmeupandupandup,andIclimbedwithhim,myinsideshummingandtwining,mymusclesclenchingandknotting,andwhenthereleasehit,Iscreamedwiththerushofit.Itwaslikehehadfedoffmyessence,butsomehow,Iwasbetterforit.Brighter.
Iwasstillcatchingmybreathasheclimbedbackupmybodyandkissedmehardonthemouth.AndthoughIfeltcompletelyweightless,Ibenttowardhim,boundtohisdirection.Heshiftedbehindme,hischesttomyback.Hishanddriftedbehindmyknee,andasheopenedme,heslidinside.Oneofhisarmscradledmyhead,theothergrippedmyleg,andashebegantomoveinslow,sensuousstrokes,Iheldhisgaze.Icouldn’tlookaway.Istudiedeverypartofhisface—thewayhishairclungtotheperspirationonhischeek,thewaytheblueofhisirisesseemedtoconsumemoreofthewhitewhilehewasinsideme,thewayhisteethclenchedwitheachdeepeningthrust.
ThenAdriankissedmeagain.
Abruisingkissthatkeptgoingashemoved,andIwasleftfeelingtheeffectsofsomethingIdidnotunderstand.Aheavywaveofemotionbuiltinsideme,burningmyeyes,andIrealizedthatwehadcrossedalineintosomethingthatfelttooclosetolovemaking.Ihadbeentoocaughtupinthismoment,inthefeelingsAdriandrewtothesurfaceofmyskin,tostopit.
Wecouldn’thavethis.Wewereenemies.Weweresupposedtobeangry,ourintimacyafight,abattlewon,orabodyconquered.This…thiswastenderness.Thiswassweetandlushand…intense.
Ifrozeatthethought,andAdriandidtoo.Oneofhishandscuppedmyjaw,theothersplayedacrossmystomach.
“Isolde?”
IneverthoughtIwouldbegtobecalledSparrow,buttohavehimspeakmyname,thickwithlustandanundercurrentofaffection…itfrightenedme.
Icouldn’tdothis.Iwasalreadyatraitortomypeople.Iwouldbenothing…nothingifIletthisprogress.
“Stop,”Isaidandpushedawayfromhim.
Allatonce,heletmego,andIclimbedoutofbed,needingtoputdistancebetweenus.IcrossedtheroomandslippedintoarobeVioletahadleft.
“DidIdosomethingwrong?”Adrianasked.
“Youshouldleave,”Isaid.Ikeptmybacktohim.Icouldn’tlookathim,orhewouldseethetearsgatheringinmyeyes—tearsthatwereattachedtoemotionsIcouldn’texplain.
Therewasalongpause,andthenthebedcreakedashestoodanddressed.
“Atleasttellme,”hesaidbeforehedeparted.“TellmeIdidn’thurtyou.”
Ishouldn’thavelookedathimthen,butitwasthedesperationinhisvoicethatcaughtmeoffguard,andnomatterhowchaoticIwasfeelingrightnow,Icouldn’tlethimthinkhehadharmedme.
EvenasImethisgaze,athicknessgatheredinmythroat,andIcouldnotclearitbeforeIspoke.
“No.”
AfterIanswered,helookedaway.Ithoughtthatperhapsitwasshamethatturnedhishead.
Hebowed.
“Goodnight,QueenIsolde.”
Withthosewords,IhadgottenwhatIwanted—awedgedrivenbetweenus—andasheclosedthedoortomyroom,Icrashedtothefloor.Thirteen
Iroseearlythenextmorninganddressed.MyoptionswerelimitedtothegownsprovidedbyAdrian,allofwhichweretightandheavilyembellished.IwouldhavetospeaktohimaboutprovidingmewithsomethingIcouldtraininregularly,thoughatthemoment,thethoughtoffacinghimatallsentmeintoaspiralofconfusingemotions.PerhapsIcouldconvinceAnatocommunicatemyneedforsomethingthatincludedaplaceformyblade,evenasIworkeditintothebodiceofmygown.Ileftmycuffsonthetablebymybed.Thisdress,ahigh-necked,sleevelessgownwithaminimalflare,wouldnotservetohidetheweapons.
VioletaandAnahadarrived.Violetacarriedatraywithbread,butter,jam,andtea.Anafollowedbehind,dressedinastructuredsilverdressthatmovedlikeliquidasshewalked.
“Wethoughtyouwouldpreferbreakfastinyourroom,”Anasaid.
“Istherenoformalbreakfast?”
InLara,myfatherdinedwiththecourteverymorningandevening;theonlymealhetookonhisownorwithmealonewaslunch.Itwasalmostritualistic—herose,dressed,anddined.After,wewouldtakeawalkinthegarden.
“Amongvassals,yes,”Anaexplained.“ButtheyarerarelyjoinedbyAdrianorthenoblesse.”
Shedidnotneedtotellmewhy.Icouldguessthereasonsfortheirsporadicvisits.
“Iwouldliketowalkthismorning,”Isaid.“Isthereagardenhere?”
“Yes,abeautifulone,”shesaid.“Adriantellsmeyoulovemidnightroses.”
Iopenedmymouthtorespondbuthesitated,wonderingwhentheyhadspokenaboutme.
“Ido.Theyremindmeofmymother.”
Anaonlynodded,andIgotthesensethatAdrianhadtoldheraboutthattoo.
“Thenweshallbeginwiththegardens.”
ThegardensoftheRedPalacewereverydifferentfromwhatIhadformulatedinmymind.I’dimaginedsomethingslightlymoregrandthanwhatmymotherhadcreatedandmyfatherhadmaintainedatCastleFiora.WhatIwalkedintowasfarmoremagnificent.Inadditiontolushflowers,trees,andplants,therewerestatues,fountains,anddecorativestonesthatcreatedamazeofdistinctgardens,eachwiththeirownthemeandflair.Iwasenchanted,tosaytheleast.
“Thisisbeautiful,”IsaidasIwalkedaheadofAna,downabankofwhitemarblestepsthatledintoaformalgarden,encasedbyaframeofboxhedges.Thecenterdesign,craftedfromaromaticflorals,remindedmeofthestainedglasswindowsinthepalace.“DidthissurvivefromKingDragos’sreign?”
“Itwasverysmall,”Anasaid,keepingafewpacesbehindme.“ItwasAdrianwhoinsistedonsomethingfarmoreextensive.”
Thatbothsurprisedandintriguedme.“Why?”
“Hefeltitwasimportant,”sheanswered.JustlikewhenSorinansweredquestionsaboutAdrian,Ifeltshewasbeingevasive,whichwasevenstrangergivenwewerediscussingthedesignofagarden.
Ilookedupattheredskyandwonderedhowthingssurvivedheresincethesuncouldnotshinedirectlyonanything,butclearlytheflowershadnotroublethriving.Therewereseveralvarieties—daturaandfoxgloves,oleanderandlilyofthevalley,irisesandlarkspur.Iwanderedfarther,losingsightofAnaasIslippedbetweenopeningsinthestonewalls.Eachgardenhadadifferentcenterpiece:someapool,othersafountain,thisoneagazebowithadelicate,filigreeroof.Itookthestepsoneatatimeandstoodforafewminutesatitscenter,enjoyingthequietofthegarden.
“QueenIsolde.”
Iturnedandfoundawomanstandingoutsidethegazebo;herarmwasloopedthroughthatofayoungercompanion.Onewasdressedinlilac,theotheringray.Ididnotrecognizethemorknowtheirnames,buttheywerevampires,nothuman,andIwonderedhowtheyhadcomeintoexistence,whatusehadAdrianfoundinthem
“Yes?”Iinquired,andtheybothbowed.
“WewantedtowelcomeyoutoRevekka,”thewomaningrayresponded.
“Thankyou,”Isaidandlookedaway.IfIwereinLara,itwouldhavecommunicatedmydismissaloftheirpresence.Here,itonlyseemedtoencouragethem.
“Thewholekingdomisintriguedbyyou,”shecontinued.“Themortalwhomanagedtosnareourking.”
Whatacoincidence.IneversuspectedIwouldbesnaredbyanyoneeither,Ithought,stillnotlookingatthem.
“We,ofcourse,thoughtthatifhemarriedatall,itwouldbeoneofthewomenatcourt,”sheadded.“Butitseemshemerelyenjoyedsampling.”
“Haveyoumerelycometoboastabouthowyoufuckedmyhusbandbeforeme?”Iasked,finallylookingatthewoman.Hereyeswidenedslightlyandthennarrowed,mouthhardeningintoatightline.Shedidnotneedtotellmeshehad—herjealousyhadtohavesprungfromsomewhere.
“Heisnotamanyoucansatisfyonyourown,”shesaid.“Heneedsmore.Youwoulddowelltorememberthat.”
“AreyousuggestingyoucansomehowmakeupforwhatIlack?”Iasked.
Thewomaningraystraightened,liftingherhead.“Everyoneknowsyouhavenotlethimfeedfromyou,”shesaid.“Hehastoreceivebloodfromsomewhere,andnowthatyouhaveforcedhimtodismissSafira,well,oneofusmusttakeherplace.”
IshouldhaveanticipatedthatSafirawouldnotmakeasecretofherdismissal,leastofallthatIhadcommandedit.Still,thatdidnotsurprisemesomuchasthiswomansuggestingshecouldsatisfymyhusbandinotherways.
“Adriandoesn’tfuckthosehefeedsfrom,”Isaid.
Bothwomenlaughed.
“Isthatwhathetoldyou?”thewomaningrayaskedbetweenlaughs.“Oh,andyoubelievedhim!”
“Hemustcareforheratleastalittle,”saidthewomaninlilac.“Orhewouldn’tspareherthedetails.”
Theycontinuedtolaugh,butasIturnedtowardthemfully,theyquieted.
“Areyousuggestingmyhusband,thekingofRevekka,isaliar?”Iasked,andtheiramusementdied.Itookasteptowardthem.“Becauseifyouare,Ithinkheshouldknowwhatyouthinkofhim.”
Thetwoexchangedalook.“Weonlymeanttoinform—”
“Youmeanttomockme,”Isaid.“ButIwillnotplaythisgame.Youwilleitherrespectmeorbeeliminatedfromthiscourt.Doyouunderstand?”
“Thereyouare!”Anasaid,joiningmebeneaththefiligreeawning.Hereyesshiftedtothewomen,whowerenowretreatingacrossthelawn.“Areyouallright?”
“Whowerethosetwo?”Iasked.
“OneisLadyBella,theotherisLadyMila.Theyarecousins.LadyBellaisthedaughterofNoblesseAnatoly.”Shepaused.“Didtheysaysomethingtoyou?”
“Morethansomething,”Irepliedandthenmethergaze.“Whatmoredoyouhavetoshowme?”
IdidnotwanderfarfromAnaaswecontinuedthroughthegardens.Ididnotthinkitwaspossibleforthemtogetanymorebeautiful,buttheydid.Eachlayoutwasdifferent,eachpathofferingadifferentroutethroughgardensofroses,hemlock,andamaryllis,pastgreatpiecesofart—glassprismsthatshownlikerubiesbeneaththeskyandstatuescarvedofvolcanicglassdepictingthelessergoddesses.
“DoesAdrian…worshiptheoldgods?”Iasked.
“Heworshipsnogods,”saidAna.“Thatdoesnotmeanhedoesn’tbelieveinthem.”
“Whywouldheofferthemaplaceinhisroyalgardensthen?”
“Youcanrespectsomeoneandnotworshipthem,”Anasaid.“RaeandYaraandKismet,theyarepeacefulgoddesses.”
HerstatementsuggestedthatAshaandDisweretheopposite,andIwascuriousaboutherthoughts,butjustthen,westeppedthroughasetofhighhedgesthatbackedupagainstanencroachinglineoftrees,distractingmefrommyquestion.
“Thisisthegrotto,”Anasaid.
IwasmomentarilytakenabackbythisplacebecauseIhadbeenherebefore—justlastnight—andwhileitlookeddifferentinwhatlighttheredskyoffered,therewasnomistakingthatsmellorthepresenceofjasminetreesallaround.
Thepool,whichhadappeareddarkinmydreams,wasfullofclear,crispwaterfromwhichsteamroseastheheatmetthecoldmorningair.Partofthepoolwastuckedbeneaththecastle,creatingthegrotto.Underthecanopy,thewallsappearedtobepaintedintoasoothingswirlofcalmingcolors.
Iwanderedclosertotheedgeofthepoolandthenturnedinaslowcircle,recallingmystrangedream.HowI’dfeltwhenAdrianhadapproached,howdesperateIwasforhimtoneverleavemysideagain,andyethowafraidIwaswewouldbecaught,anddespiteallthat,Istilltookhimintomybody.Mythoughtswereachaoticstorm—amixtureoftheIsoldewhohadlovedAdrianinthedreamandtheonewhowonderedhowI’dimaginedaplaceI’dneverbeen.Wasthissomekindofmagic?PerhapssomethingresidualthathadfollowedmefromSadovea?
“Isolde?”Anaasked,anoteofconcerncoloringhervoice.
Mygazesnappedtohers.
“Areyouallright?”sheasked.Itwasn’tlostonme,thenumberoftimesI’dbeenaskedthatsinceleavingLara.
“I—”
BeforeIcouldspeak,abellbegantotoll,andIlookedtoAnaforanexplanation.
“Itisnoon,”shesaid.“Thecastlegatesareopeningforcourt.ImustgetyoutoAdrian.”
“Court?”
“Adrianhasbeengoneforsolong.Whileheishere,hissubjectswillpetitionhimtoendfeuds,sendaid,oreventurnthem.”
“Turnthem?Intovampires?”I’dbeentoldthisbutstillcouldn’tseemtobelievesomeonewouldaskforit.
“Immortalityisdesiredbymany,Isolde,”Anasaid.“ThequestioniswhowillpresentasusefultoAdrianand,now,toyou.”
Tome?WasIexpectedtograntimmortalitytoo?
Ourreturntothecastlewasthroughanalternateentrance.Thecorridorswerenarrowerandcolder,butAnapromiseditwasthebestwaytotravelthecastlewithoutinterruption.
“Therearemaps,”sheexplained.“Youcangetjustaboutanywhereexceptthelibrary.”
Ifrowned.“Why?”
“BecauseitwasaddedduringAdrian’sreign,andthepassageswerefromDragos.”
Weexitedthecorridorintoacloset,whichledintoahallway,andfromthere,Anaescortedmetoaroomjustoffthegreathall.
“Youonlyneedtoknock,”shesaid.“Heknowstoexpectyou.”
Iwaiteduntilshewasgoneanddidso,findingDarocontheotherside.
“Myqueen,”hesaidandbowedasIentered.Iwonderedifhehatedbowingtome,ifhehatedme.Atleast,unlikeothersinthecastle,hedidnotshowit.
“Commander.”InoddedasIsweptpasthim,haltingassoonasIwasinsidetheroom.
“Itakemyleave,”DarocsaidandleftmealonewithAdrian.
Hestoodopposite,dressedinblack,holdingasmallbook.Hissurcoatwasfarmoreembellished,withadesignembroideredalloveringoldthread.Overthetop,heworeablackfurvestandoverthatacollarofgold.Hehadpulledhalfhishairback,sothatsomefellinsoftwavesaroundhisface.Ablackcrownofspikesmadehimappearfarmoreimposing.
Ihaddreadedthismoment,facinghimafteraskinghimtoleavelastnight.Mychestfeltheavy,fullofastaticthatincreasedthelongerIheldhisgaze,whichtookeffort,becauseIdidnotwanthimtoseehowIfelt.EvenIdidnotknow.
“Isolde,”hesaid.
“Adrian.”
Westaredateachother,andbeforehecouldbroachthesubjectoflastnight,Ispoke.
“Whatdoyouexpectofme?”Iasked.
Adrian’sbrowsdrewtogether.“Whatdoyoumean?”
“Duringcourt.AmImerelyanornamenttoadorntheseatbesideyourthrone?Becauseifthatisthecase,thenIdeclineyourinvitation.”
Adriansetasidethebookhehadbeenreadingandfacedmefully.
“Youmakemanypresumptions,wife.Yourpresencebymysideisnotupfordiscussion,norisitforshow.Youaremyqueen.Iexpectwewillruletogether,whichmeansyourparticipationduringcourt.”
Iblinkedathim.“DoesrulingtogethermeanyouwilllistentomewhenIbegyounottocontinueinvadingtheNineHouses?”
Adriansaidnothing.
“Ithoughtnot.”
“Isolde,”hesaidmynameagain,quietandalmostdesperate.Ididn’tlikeitMysweetorSparrowwerefarlesspersonalthanmyactualname.
“Donotpretendtogivemeanequalsayintherulingofyourlandifitonlyextendstocourtpolitics.”
Iwhirledonmyheels,intendingtoleave,butassoonasItouchedthehandle,Adrian’shandcoveredmine.Iturnedmyheadslightly,onlytofindhislipshoverednear.Hestoodclose,buthisbodydidnottouchmine,andinthatspace,somethinglikeacurrentbegantorunbetweenus.Ittookeverythinginmypowernottoleanintoit.
“Youareinfuriating,”hesaid.
“Youaretheonewhomarriedmeonawhim.”
“Itwasn’tawhim.Itwasverymuchintentional.”
“Youforgottoinformme,”Isaid.
Partofmeknewhowhewouldanswer.Therewassomethingundeniablebetweenus,somethingcompletelyelectricthatevenhatecouldnotdissolve.Itkeptmerootedtothespotnow,whenIwouldusuallyfighttobefree.
Iturnedtowardhim,thoughhestillcagedmeagainstthedoor.
“Givemetime,”hesaid.“Soonyouwillbegmetoconquerthelandyouwishtosave.”
“Nowwhoismakingpresumptions?”
“Iamofferingtruth,”hesaid.
Iglaredathim,andtherewasaknock.Itcamefromtheoppositesideoftheroom,whereadoorledintothegreathall.
Adriandidnotimmediatelyanswer,juststaredatmeamomentlonger,somehowlookingbothfierceandmournful.Hewantedtotalkaboutlastnight,butIwasmoreeagertotalkaboutvampireslikeLadyBellaandLadyMila.Moreimportantly,whowouldhechooseashisnextvassal?
Anotherknock,andIpushedagainsthischest.
“Wearebeingsummoned,”Isaid.
Hegrabbedmywristandpressedmyfingerstohislips.
“Imeantit,Isolde.Iwouldhaveyoumakeyourownjudgmentstoday.”
Ibelievedhim.
Heheldontomyhandandfitteditintothecrookofhiselbowasweenteredthegreathall.Therewerepeoplegathered,manywithvariationsofAdrian’sgoldcollar.Noblesse,IguessedwhenIspottedGesalacinthecrowdfittedwithsilverandemerald.Hisgazewasdarkandmademefeeldread.Still,IthoughtitsaidsomethingabouthisloyaltytoAdrian—andthiscourt—thathepresenteddespitehisson’sdeath.
ThoughperhapsitsaidmoreabouthowfearedAdriantrulywas.
“WhoisNoblesseAnatoly?”Iasked.
Adrianlookeddownatmeandthennoddedtowardthefarwall.
“Heisthedour-lookingone,”hesaid.
Hedidnotneedtogivemeanymoreofadescriptionthanthat.NoblesseAnatolystoodaside,dressedinblackandsilver,analmostsleepyexpressiononhisfaceduetolarge,round,half-liddedeyes.
“Youwillhavetotellmelaterofyourrelationshipwithhisdaughter,LadyBella,”Isaid.
Adrianraisedabrow.“Iwilltellyounow.Thereisnorelationship.”
“Really?Sheseemstoknowalotaboutyoursexualexploits,”Isaid.“Andyourbloodlust.”
AdrianheldmyhandaloftasImadetheshortwalkuptheprecipicewheretwoidenticalthronesnowsat.Hepausedbeforethemandtouchedmychin,agentlemovementthatmademyfaceflush.
“Youwillfindwithinthesewallsmanyprofesstoknowme,”hesaid.“Youmusttrustwhatyouhavecometoknow.”
“Youareaskingmetotrustyou,”Isaid.
Adrianguidedmeback,asubtleinvitationtosit,ourprivateconversationfinished.Hereleasedmyhandandturned.
“Openthedoors,”hesaidandsettledhimselfonhisthrone.
Adrian’scourtwasalreadycrowdedagainstthewallsofthegreathall,leavingthecenterofthefloorfreeforpetitioners.Iwasnotcertainwhattoexpect,butthelineseemedtogoonforever,fromtheopeningofthehalloutthefrontdoorsofthecastle.
Thefirstvillagershuffledforward.
“YourMajesties,”shesaid,bowing.“MynameisAndrada.IamfromthevillageofSosara.Ourcropsweredestroyedbyacreaturewehaveyettocatch.Ouranimalshavefollowed.Weareinthemiddleofwinteranddonothaveenoughfoodtosustainourvillageuntilsummer.Wehumblyaskformoreprotectionandfood.Wearedying.”
IlookedtoAdrian,whosepostureremindedmeofsomeonewhowasbored,andyethisexpressionwasserious.Therewereanynumberofcreaturesthatcouldkillcattleanddestroycrops,therusalka,koldum,andleyahjusttonameafew.
“Youhavetraveledfar,Andrada,”Adriansaid.“Tellme,haveyoubroughtthismattertoyournoblesse?”
SothenoblesseofRevekkawerelikethelordsofLara—theyrepresentedvariousterritoriesandweresupposedtoprovideabufferbetweenthepeopleandtheirking.
Sheswallowed.“Ihave,YourMajesty.Ourpleashavegone…unanswered.ThoughIamsureNoblesseCiroisverybusy.”
“Isthatwhatyouwouldclaim,NoblesseCiro?Thatyouaretoobusytoattendtoyourpeople?”Adrianasked,hisattentionshiftingtoamanwithshortblondhairandbrowswhostoodjustattheedgeofthecrowd.Heworerichrobes,farmoreextravaganteventhanAdrian’s.Hiscollarwassilverwithpurplegems.
“Ofcoursenot,YourMajesty,”NoblesseCirosaid,castingahardenedglanceatAndrada.“ThisisthefirsttimeIhaveheardofSosara’splight.”
“Thenperhapsyoushouldspendmoretimeamongyourpeople,”Adriansaid.
“Iwilltakecareofit,”Ciroreplied,andmypulsethrummedheavily.
“Ofcourse,”Adriansaid.“Cirowillescortyoubacktoyourvillage.Iwillsendmembersoftheroyalguardwithfoodaswell,andtheywillstayuntilthemonsterdestroyingyourcropsandslaughteringyourcattlehasbeenkilled.Doesthatsatisfyyourrequest?”
“M-morethan,”Andradastuttered,hereyesdartingtoCiro.
Shefearedhim.Istartedtoprotestthenoblesse’sreturntoSosarawhenAdrianspoke.
“DonotfearNoblesseCiro,”Adriantoldher.“Hehasalreadyfailedinhisdutytoprotectyouandyourpeople.Oncemore,andhewillbeexecuted.”
ItwasaclearpromiseandthreatthatmadeCiropaler,butIwasgladtoseeconsequencesforabsentnobles.Therewasnothingmoreinfuriatingthanamanorwomanwhodidnotcarefortheirpeople,asIhadbeenremindedduringmyfather’snegotiationswithAdrian.
“Maygoodhealthandabundanceblessyourmarriage,YourMajesties,”Andradasaid,bowinglow.Asshemovedtoleavethegreathall,shewasjoinedbythreeofAdrian’ssoldiers,whoflankedherasiftocreateabarrierbetweenherandNoblesseCiro,wholingeredfartherback,followingslowly.
Therewereafewotherrequestsjustlikethat,thoughtheycamefromattentivenoblesse.Inonehorribleinstance,alamiahadmanageditswayintoahomeandstolenawayachild.Itwasneverfound,butatrailofbloodhadledbacktothewater.Anotherstorycamefromthewestwheremenwerebeingluredbyaniarawhowouldhypnotizethemanddrainthemofbothbloodandsemen.
IwassurprisedbythenumberofmonstersthatdaredtoravishRevekka,giventhatvampiresruled,buthearingthesecomplaintsandconcernsmademerealizetheywerenodifferentthantheNineHouses.Perhapstheonlysuperiorthingtheyhadwasanarmyofvampirestofight.
Iwatchedthenextvillagerapproach.Hewasanoldermanwhohadagrayingbeardandshorthairhekepthiddenunderacap.Hisclothesweremostlyrags,thoughthewomanwholingeredbehindhim,blondandbeautiful,woreafarnicergown,andIguessedthey’dspenttheirlastbitofcoinonittobehere.
“YourMajesty,”themansaid,addressingonlyAdrianashemadeasweepingexaggeratedbow.“IamCain,afarmerfromJovea.MywifeandIhavethreedaughters,butVesna,sheisthemostbeautiful.Doyounotagree?”
Iinstantlyfeltdisgust,bothforthisman’sabilitytosingleoutthebeautyofoneofthreedaughtersandbecauseofhisprobingquestiontomyhusband.IlookedtoAdrian,whosemouthhardened.
“Myvillagereliesuponmetosowcropsandharvesteveryyear,butIamgrowingolderandinpoorerhealth.Astheyearspass,itwillbecomemoredifficulttoprovide.SoIaskyou—please,makemeanimmortal.Inexchange,Ioffermydaughterasaconcubinetoserveyou.”
Theshockofhisstatementreverberatedthroughme,stiffeningmyspine.IsawAdrianglanceatmefrommyperipheral,andIwonderedwhatmyastonishmenthadlookedliketothepeoplecrowdedinthegreathall.Caindidnotseemtonoticemeatall,hisgazelingeringuponAdrian.Isuspectedthatwasbecausehewasthetargetofhisrequest—Icouldnotturnthismanintoavampire.
Mygazeshiftedtotheyounggirl,whoseheadwasbowed.Herhairfellstraight,andsheletitcurtainheryouthfulface.Shehadyettoraisehereyestoanyone,andInotedhowhershouldershunchedasifshewantedtocrawlintoherself.Shedidnotwishtobehere.
“Yousayyouareafarmerandacornerstoneofyourvillage,”Adrianbegan.“YetIhavehearddifferently.Ihaveheardthatyouholdcropshostageinexchangeforcoinorfavors.Itdoesnotsoundlikeyouareallthatnecessarytome.”
Theman’seyeswidened,andIhadtoadmit,IwasimpressedbyAdrian’sownknowledgeofhiskingdom.
“YourMajesty,”Cainsaidandlaughedawkwardly.“Whywouldyoulistentotheselies?”
“Areyoucallingyournoblessealiar?”Adrianasked.
“IammerelysayingthatNoblesseDraculhasbeenmisled.”
Evenastheyspoke,Icouldnotkeepmyeyesoffthewomanlingeringinthisman’sshadow.HerfingerswereturningwhiteandallIcouldthinkwasthatIhadtofreeherfromthis.
Irosetomyfeet,andwhateverthemanhadbeensayingendedabruptlyashiseyesfoundmine.Irepressedtheurgetoscowl,maintainingmyplacidexpression.Therewasahungerinhisgaze,andIdidnotknowifitwasforpowerormyflesh.
“Cain,isit?”Iasked.
“Y-yes,”themansaid,andthenhebowed,asifseeingmeforthefirsttime.“YourMajesty.”
IshiftedmygazetoVesna.“Yourdaughter,howoldisshe?”
“Sheissixteen,myqueen.”
“Sixteen,”Irepeatedanddescendedthesteps,stoppingafewfeetinfrontofthem.“Come.”
Thegirlglancedatherfather,andhewavedherforwardhurriedly.Shemadeawidearcaroundhim,asifshefearedhewouldreachforher.Assheapproached,shecurtsiedbutwouldnotmeetmygaze.Iguidedhereyestomine.
“Vesna,whatareyourskills?”
“Icancook,clean,sew,”shesaid,andhervoicewassoft,almostmusical.
“Canyousing?”Iasked,myhearthopefulforheranswer,andforabriefmoment,Iimaginedteachinghersongsfrommymother’shomeandfeltasurgeofhappiness.
“Ican,”shesaid.
“Thenyouwillstayhereinthecastlewithme.Icoulduseamortalcompanion,”Isaid.
Beforeshecouldreply,herfatherclappedhishandsloudly.“Thatismostgenerousofyou,myqueen!”
Istaredathim,anddespitethelookofdisgustIcasthisway,hemaintainedhisenthusiasticexpression.Afteramoment,IreturnedmyattentiontoVesna.
“Myqueen,thatisverygenerousofyou.Ifear…Ifeartoleavemysistersbehind.”
“Wewilldosomethingaboutthosefears,”IrepliedandthensummonedAna,whohadpositionedherselfnearthedais.“TakeVesnatomyquarters.Iwilljoinherafterthisisover.”
Iwatcheduntiltheydisappearedintotheadjoiningroom,andasIturned,Idrewmyknifefrombetweenmybreasts,hidingitinmyskirtsbeforeturningbacktoherfather.Itooktwodeliberatestepstofacehim.
“Youwillnotregretyourdecision,myqueen!”
“Youareright,”Isaid.“Iwon’t.”
Theknifeslidhomebetweenhisribs,andashiseyeswidened,Iwithdrewitwithajerksothathefellheavyanddeadatmyfeet,blooddrippingfromhismouth.Istaredoutatthosegatheredbeforemeandthosewhowerewaitingforanaudience.
“Anyoneelsewishtooffertheirdaughtersasaconcubinetomyhusband?”Iasked.
Therewasonlysilence.
Iturnedandmademywaybackuptheprecipice.
Adrianheldouthishand.“Yourknife.”
Ihesitatedbutofferedittohim,ashedidn’tseemtobesomuchdisappointedaspleased.Thenhetookitandcleaneditashehaddonelastnight,returningittomeimmediately.AnothersetofguardsdraggedCain’sbodyfromthecenteroftheroom,leavingastreakofbloodastheywent.
NooneelseleftmeoutintheiraddressafterCain,andhewasnotthelasttoaskforimmortality,thoughnoonebotheredofferingtheirdaughterasasexslave.WhatsurprisedmemostwasthatAdriandeclinedeveryrequestfromamortaltobeturned,andIbegantowonderwhatwouldconvincehim.
Thefinalpersontoaskwasfamiliartome,andseeinghiminthegreathalloftheRedPalaceshockedme.
“KingGheroghe.”
HiskingdomwasVelaandhadyettobeconqueredbyKingAdrian.
“Prin—QueenIsolde,”hesaid,bowing.“Apleasure.IthasbeenalongwhilesincelastIlookeduponyourbeauty.”
IfeltAdrian’seyesuponmeasIspoke.
“Ithasbeenawhile,”Isaid.“SinceIputaknifeagainstyourson’sthroat.HowisPrinceHoratiu?”
Hehadbeenoneofseveraltosuggesttheycouldbothpleasemeandleadmypeople,insinuatingthatIcouldnotdoitonmyown,andwhenhe’dcorneredmeinthedarktokissme,I’dreactedbydrawingblood.
“Muchrecovered,”Gheroghereplied.
“Whatisthereasonforyourvisit,KingGheroghe?”Adrianasked,anoteofirritationinhisvoice.
“Ihavecometosurrender,”hesaid.Therewasasurprisequietthatfloodedtheentireroom,andthenheadded,“Inexchange,Iaskonlytobecomeimmortal.”
“SurrenderdoesnotusuallyincludenegotiatingwhereIamconcerned,KingGheroghe,”Adriansaid.“Yousurrenderandkeepyourtitleandensurethesafetyofyourpeople.Therearenootheroptions.”
“Velahasmuchtooffer,myking.Notonlywouldyouinheritawealthofironore,butyouwouldhaveaccesstolaunchanattackontheAtollofNalani,akingdomrichinpearlsandgems.”
Istraightenedandmyhandsfisted,hearingmymother’shomelandthrownintotalksofconquering.
“Youwouldinheritsomuchmorethanawifewithapenchantforknives.”
“Ilikemywifeandherknives,andwhileI’dpreferyoursurrenderoverbattle,Iwillgladlygotowarnevertheless.”
KingGheroghe’seyeswidened,andasAdrianrose,Ifollowed.
“I-Isolde,”hesaid,asifbeggingmetocometohisdefense.
“YoulostmysupportwhenyousuggestedthatAdrianinvademymother’slands,”Isaid.“Returntoyourkingdomandawaitthewar.”
ThememoryofAdrian’swordswerenotlostonme;IhadjustapprovedoftheinvasionofoneoftheNineHouses.
Adriantookmyhand,andwereturnedtotheadjacentroom.Hepushedmeagainstthedoor,draggingmyhipsagainsthis,andkissedme.
Iheldhisheadbetweenmyhandsandfreedmyself.
“Howmanywomenhaveyouacceptedasconcubines?”Iasked.
“None,”hesaid.“ButIhaveneverexecutedamanfortheoffereither.”
“Hewasasnake,”Ispat.
“Iamnotdisagreeingordisapproving,”hesaid,andhegroundintomefurther.Thehardlengthofhiscocksettledagainstmystomach.Thenhisvoiceloweredtoalowrumble,anditwasasifhewereconfessingasin.“YouareeverythingIhaveeverwanted.”
Istaredathimandsawthesamegentleness,thesamerawemotionI’dseenlastnight.AndIcouldn’tindulge.
Ipushedhimbackandslidoutfrombetweenhimandthedoor.Hereachedformywrist,andImethisgaze.
“Isolde,tellmewhatIdidwrong.”
“Canyounotreadminds?”Icountered,frustrated,thoughIreallyhopedhecouldn’tinthismoment.Ididn’twanthimtoknowthetruth—thatIcouldnothandlethecarewithwhichhehadlookedatme,thatIfeltmoreemotionthanIcouldmanagewhenIlookedathim.
“I’mtryingtogiveyouprivacy,”hesaid,anditwasthefirsttimeIsensedhisexasperationwithme.
“Ijust…didnotknowyouwouldmakeahabitofvisitingmybedeverynight.Itisnotasifweneedtoproduceanheir,soitishardlynecessary.”
Hereleasedmebutturnedfullytowardme,towering,eyesnarrowed.“Areyousayingyoutireofme,myqueen?”
Ihatedthewaythosewordshurtmychest,andIhatedhowuncertainIsoundedasIanswered,breathless.“Yes.”
Adrianstaredamomentlonger,asifhethoughtIwouldchangemymindbeneathhisscrutiny,butIdidn’t—Icouldn’t—andIhopedthatifhehadchosentoreadmymindinthismoment,mythoughtsreflectedthesame.AdrianandIweresupposedtobeenemies,andIcouldonlystandourclosenesssolongasIstillfeltangertowardhim.
Finally,hetookhisleave,offeringonlyasinglebow.IwonderedhowlongI’dbeabletokeepmydistancebeforethatunexplainedneedforhimtookoverandbetrayedmyself-control.
IreturnedtomyquartersaftercourttofindAnasittingwithVesna.ThetwolookedupasIenteredandthenstoodtocurtsy.
“Myqueen,”Vesnasaid,keepinghereyesonherfeet.
“Youwillhavetolearntomeetmygazeifyouaretoworkforme,Vesna,”Isaid,andwhenshedid,sheblushedadeepcrimson.
“Iapologize,myqueen.”
“Donotapologize,”Isaid.“Ana,willyousummonVioleta?”
Shenoddedandlefttheroom.AlonewithVesna,Iinvitedhertositbesidemeonthebed,onceagainkeepingmydistancefromthehearth.
“Imustinformyouofyourfather’sdeath,Vesna,”Isaid.“I…”
Ididnotknowwhattoadd.
Imurderedhim,Ithought,butIdidnothavethechancetoaddanythingtomystatement.Vesnaburstintotears.Itwasatorrentofemotionthatlastedonlyafewsecondsbeforeshewasabletocomposeherself.
“I’msorry,”Isaid.Iwasn’tapologizingforkillingherfather,butIwasapologizingforherhurt.
“No,please.Donotbesorry.Ijust…donotknowhowtofeel.Hewasterrible,tobesure,atruemonsternotonlytomeandmysistersbutourmotherandthetownspeople.Tobetruthful,Idonotknowhowhesurvivedthislong.”
Shetoldmeofinstanceswhenherfather’sfoodordrinkhadbeenpoisoned,buthe’descapedanyattemptsbyfeedingthecontaminatedfaretotheiranimals.Ifeltsickatthethought.
“Still,hewasmyfather,”shesaid.
“Youdonothavetodecidehowtofeeltodayortomorroworeverifthatisyourchoice,”Isaid.“ButIcannothavemensellingtheirdaughterswithoutconsequences.”
“Iunderstand,”shewhispered.“IamonlygladthatIcanprotectmysistersfromhim.”
“Tellmeaboutthem,”Isaid.
VesnasmiledwhenIasked.Theywerenineandeleven,andtheirnameswereJasenkaandKseniya.Shetoldastoryofhowmuchtheylovedflowersandhowtheywouldshriekwithdelightwhentheyspottedwhitebutterfliesrestingonpetals,andastheyflewaway,thegirlswouldfollow,dancingastheywent.
“Wecalleditthebutterflydance,”shesaid,smilingevenastearsstainedherface.“IthinkIrememberthosetimessowellbecausetherewassunjustbeyondtheborder,andsometimes,wewouldrunbeneathit.”
Thesun.
ItwasstrangehowthethoughtofitfilledmewithmourningasIrememberedhowI’dsoughtthetallesthillsinLarajustsoIcouldlieclosertoitsrays.Homesicknessswampedme.
“Whataboutyourmother?”Iasked,swallowinghard,blinkingbackthetearsburningmyeyes.
Atthequestion,Vesna’smouthbegantoquiver.“Idonotknowwhatwillbecomeofher.I…”Shefellforwardandsobbedintoherhands,andtheonlythingIcouldthinktodowasholdher.Aftershehadcriedawhile,shewasabletotellmemoreabouthermother.“Sheusedtosing,”Vesnasaid.“Butmyfatherwouldyell,sosheonlysangwhenhewasgone.Thenhebegantohit,andhersingingstoppedaltogether.”
IsentherwithVioletaafterthat,promisingbeforesheleft,“Youmayleavetovisityourfamilyasoftenasyouwish.”
Shesmiledatme.“Thankyou,myqueen.”
Alone,Ilayuponmybed,andasIstaredupatthecanopy,thetangledpatternblurredwithmytears.Imissedmyfatherandthepresenceofmymothersomuch,mychestached.Iclosedmyeyesagainstthepainandrolledontomyside,hummingmymother’slullaby,theonethathadplayedfromthemusicboxmyfatherhadgivenme—theonehewouldbringmeinlessthantwoweeks’time.
Youstillhavehim,Iremindedmyself.
Andyethisabsenceburroweddeeper,andforthefirsttimesinceI’dleftLara,Ifeltverymuchalone.Fourteen
Ihadnoself-control.
Adriandidnotvisitmybedthatnight,andwhileIknewhewashonoringexactlywhatI’daskedfor,I’dneverwantedhimtodefymywishessomuchinmylife.ItwasnotdramatictosayIwrithed.Iwassouncomfortableinmyskin.EachcaressagainstmynipplesandengorgedclitwasareminderofAdrian’sabsence.IpushedthecoversawayuntilIwasexposedtothenight.Thechillairblanketedmybody,andasIclosedmyeyes,fingerspartingmyflesh,IheardAdrian’svoice.
“Dreamingofme,Sparrow?”
WhenIopenedmyeyes,hestoodnear,watchingme.HewasthesameAdrianI’dwitnessedinthegrotto,untroubledandunmarred,surroundedbyjasminetreesanddarkness,andwhilehewasjustasbeautiful,IrealizedIlikedtheseverityofhisfacenow—thewaylifehadetchedangerintohiseyesandthesetofhisjaw.
“Idreamofyoualways,”Isaid,embarrassedbythewords,andthoughtheyweretrue,theywerenothingIwouldeversayaloud.Istartedtopulloutofmyself,butAdrianheldmyhandagainstmyheat,guidingmyfingerstoreturn.
“No,letmewatch,”heimplored,andmywholebodyflushedwithhisrequest.HekneltbetweenmylegsasIpleasuredmyself.Withinmoments,hejoinedme,drawinghiscockintohishandandstrokinghimself.Wedidn’ttouch,butweheldeachother’sgazes,andourbreathsquickened,moansrisingtogether.IwatchedhimuntilIcouldnolongerkeepmyeyesfromrollingbackasIfoundrelease.Ilaythereafewmoments,expectingtofeelhisbodypressedagainstmineintheaftermath,buttherewasnothing,andwhenIopenedmyeyes,hewasn’tthere.
***
Thenextmorning,Iroseearly,unabletorest,andheadedforthegarden,despitethefactthatAdrianhadtoldmenottoleavemyroomwithoutanescort.Thathadbeenuponarrival,andsince,Ihadbeenresponsibleforthedeathofonevampireandonemortal.
IfeltIwasprettysafe.
Iwasn’tsurehowlongitwouldtakeformetogetusedtoRevekkamornings,buttheywerenotcrispandgoldenlikethoseofLara.Thehorizonblazedcrimsonred,andbladesofthesamelightcutacrossthegarden,castingotherpartsindeepshadow.Therewasnothingcheeryaboutit—itwasabloodbath.
AsIwanderedalongthepaths,Iwrappedmycloaktightlyaroundmetofightthechill.ItwasnocolderinRevekkathanitwasinLara,forwhichIwasglad,becauseIhadheardwinterherewaslongandharsh,withthelandaccumulatingseveralfeetofsnow.Ipreferredsummer—theheightofitwhenthesunwashottest.Blinkingupatthebloodysky,IdoubtedIwouldfeelthoseraysanytimesoon
Mymeanderingbroughtmetothegrotto,andIlingeredattheedgeofthepool,enjoyingtheheatwaftingfromthewaterbeforesheddingmycloakandtheremainderofmyclothes.
ThepoolwasshallowwhereIenteredandgrewdeeperasIwadedintothecenter.Suddenly,IwantedAdrianhere,bodyslickandwarm.Iwouldcoaxcomefromhiscockandslidehimbetweenmythighs.Iwouldclimbhisbodyuntilhecouldfithimselfinmine,andIwouldridehimuntilhecameinsideme.Thosethoughtsgavewaytoareelofimages,andIcouldnothelpsqueezingmylegstogether,fightingtheurgetoonceagainpleasuremyself.
ThisconnectiontoAdrianwasabnormal.
IdippedbeneaththesurfaceofthewatertostopmythoughtsfromspiralingandstayeduntilIcouldnolongerholdmybreath.WhenIsurfaced,Icameface-to-facewithGesalac.
Inmyhastetobreakthroughthewater,Ihadcomeuptoofar,exposinghalfmybodytothenoblesse.Gesalacdidnotlowerhiseyes,evenasIretreatedsothatthewaterrosetomyshoulders.
“Youdidnotcomeupforair,”heexplained.“Iwasconcerned.”
“Howlongwereyouwatchingme,Noblesse?”
“Iwasnotwatching,”hesaid,butheofferednootherexplanation.“Iwouldbemindfulofwhereyouchoosetoswim,myqueen.Theking’srageisrarelyrational.”
IdidnotlikehiswarningorhiscommentaboutAdrian.EvenifAdrianwasirrational,inthisinstance,hisangerwouldbejustified.
“Nooneaskedyoutolinger,Noblesse,”Isaid,readyforhimtoleave.Iwastooexposedandweaponless,andIdidnottrusthisintentions.
Thevampirestaredamomentlonger,thenbowedhisheadandleft.Ididnotexitthepoolimmediately,fearingthatGesalacstilllingerednearby.WhenIfeltenoughtimehadpassed,Idressed,pullingthehoodofmycloakovermyheadtokeepthechillatbay.
Imademywaytothecastle,decidingtotakethepassageAnahadshowedmeratherthanreturnthroughthegarden.Onceinmyroom,Ichangedintodryclothesandbraidedmystill-wethair.AsIworked,VioletaandVesnaarrivedwithbreakfast.
Vesnaheldthetray,andthoughshelookedfarmorecomposedthanshehadyesterday,therewasasoftsadnesstoherfeatures.Icouldnotimaginehowshefelt—togrieveherabuser—buttheexpectationoftheworldwasthatwelovedourparentsnomattertheircrimesagainstus.
Asshesetthetrayatmybedside,Inoticedsheworethesameclothesasyesterday.
“Doyouhaveachangeofclothes,Vesna?”Iasked.
“No,myqueen,butIhavesentforthem,”shesaid.“I’mnotsurewhentheywillarrive.”
“Perhapsweshouldhavesomemade,”Isuggested.
“TomorrowismarketdayinCelCeredi,”Violetasaid.“IhadhopedtotakeVesnaanyway.”
“Good,”Isaid.“Pickoutsomefabricwhileyouarethere.”
“Isthereanythingyourequire,myqueen?”
ThequestioncaughtmeoffguardbecauseIdidnotknowenoughaboutmyfuturecircumstancesinthecastletoanswer.
“PerhapsIwillgowithyou,”Isaid.“TogetanideaofwhatImayneed.”
Violetahesitated.
“Isthataproblem?”
“No,myqueen.Iamonlysurprised.Ihaveneverknownaroyaltovisitthemarket,”shesaid.
“ThenIshallbethefirst,”Isaidandthenglanceddownatmytray,finallypayingattentiontomyfood.“Whatisthis?”
“Oh,it’syetta,”Violetasaid.“It’satraditionalRevekkianbreakfast,thoughyou’llfindeveryonehastheirownwayofmakingit.”
“Andwhatisinyetta?”
Itlookedlikeastew,andwhileitdidnotsmellhorrible,itcertainlylookedquestionable.
“Oh,manythings,”shesaid.“Sausages,bacon,spinach,tomatoes,tonsofspices…that’sagooseeggontop,ifyouwerewondering.”
Ihadbeen.
Idippedmyspoonintothethickbrothandtookatentativesip,surprisedbyhowflavorfulitreallywas.ItcamewithahardpieceofbreadthatVioletaexplainedwassupposedtobeusedattheendtosoakupwhatremainedofthedish.
“Nothinggoestowaste,”shesaid.
Ifinishedthebowl,partlybecauseIfoundIwantedtopleaseVioletawhohadbeensoexcitedaboutthedish.After,shecollectedthetrayandleftwithVesnaintow.Iwasnotalonelongwhentherewasanotherknockatmydoor.IwasexpectingAna,whostillneededtodressmywound.
Instead,itwasAdrian.
Icouldn’tdescribethefeelinghispresencetriggeredinsideme,butitwaslikeshattering.Myheartbeatsweptintoafrenziedpulsethatmademybodyflush.Beneathhisgaze,Ifeltuncertainofhowtopresentmyself—consciousofhiseyesoneverypartofme,consciousofthewordsI’dsaidthathaddrivenhimfrommybedandhowwehadpartedyesterday.
“Adrian,”Isaid,hisnamesoundingmorelikeaquestion.
Hisexpressionremainedpassiveandalittlecold.
“I’vecometoinviteyoutoHighCouncil.Iwillbemeetingwiththenoblesse,”hesaid.“WewillbediscussingtheattacksatVaidaandSadovea.I…thoughtyouwouldwanttojoin.”
“Ofcourse,”Isaidandattemptedtoimbuemyvoicewithasmuchauthorityandcontrolashis.
Therewasastrainedsilencethatfollowed,asifhewishedtosaymore,thoughhedidnotspeak.Afteramoment,hetookabreath.“Anawillbringyou.Shewillbeinattendanceaswell.”
Hestartedtowardthedoor,andIfoughttheurgetocallhimbacktome,feelinguncomfortablewithhiscoldness,knowingitwasbecauseofwhatIsaid.WhydidIfeelthiswayaboutourdistance?Hadn’tIhopedforexactlythisuponarrivingattheRedPalace?Ishouldberelievedithadworkedsowell.
“Adrian.”Hisnameslippedfrommymouth,andIwishedIcouldtakeitback.Hehaltedandstaredatme,andmylipspartedasIsearchedforwordstospeak.
“I…”WhatwasIgoingtosay?I’msorry?Comeback?Thosewordsmademecringe.“Violetaisgoingtomarkettomorrow.Iwouldliketogowithher.”
“Iamnotopposed,”hesaid.“ButIwillhavetosendIsacandMihatoaccompanyyou.”
“NotSorin?”Iasked.
Iwasusedtoallthreeactingasmyprotectors.
“Sorinisonassignment,”Adriansaid.
Oh.Despitemycuriosity,Ididnotaskformoreinformation.Instead,Ithankedhim.
Thewayhelookedatmemademethinkhewasn’tusedtoexpressionsofgratitude,andIsupposedthatwasfitting,giventhathewastheBloodKing.
HewasabouttoturnoncemorewhenIcalledhimbackagain.“Adrian.”
Thistime,Isawthefrustrationinthesetofhisjaw.
“Yes?”thequestionwasclipped,almostahiss,andIfoughtmyownirritation
“I’dliketosendforVesna’sfamily,hermotherandtwosisters.”
“Youwishtorelocatethem?”heasked.
Ihesitated.“Isthatpossible?”
“IwillhavetospeakwithTanaka.”
“Please.”
Henodded,andwiththat,heleft.
Anaarrivedashorttimelateranddressedmywound.Sheworewhitetoday,whichmadeherhairlookpale,herskinneartranslucent,andherlipsfarmorecrimson.Thecolormademethinkoffreshblood,andsuddenlyIwonderedwhoAnahadtakenasavassal.Ihesitatedtoask,consideringIhadinsultedheratourfirstmeetingwhenI’daskedifAdrianhadturnedher,butdrinkingbloodseemedfarmorecommonthansiringanothervampire,soIdid.
Shesurprisedmebyblushing.
“HernameisIsla,”shesaid.
NowIwasevenmorecurious.“HaveIseenher?Wassheinthegreathalltheothernight?”
“No,sheisvisitingfamilyinCelCera.”
“Ifsheisgone,whodoyoutakefrom?”
IwasmostlycuriousbecauseofAdrian.DidhehavealineofmortalwomentocyclethroughifSafirawasunavailable?She’dcalledherselfhisfavoredvassal—didthatimplyhehadothers?AndnowthatI’daskedhimtostopdrinkingfromher,whowouldhechoose?
Anahesitatedandthenanswered,“Idon’t.”
Mybrowsknittedtogether.“Won’tyoustarve?”
“Iwon’tstarve,”Anasaidwithasmall,amusedsmile.Shefocusedintentlyuponmyarm,smoothingacoolingsalveevenlyuponmyskin.“Shewillonlybegonefourdays.”
“Whywouldn’tyoudrinkfromsomeoneelse?”
“BecauseIdonotwishto,”Anaanswered.
Ittookherlookingatmeforittosinkin.Islawasnotonlyhervassalbutherlover.
“Oh,”Isaid.“Doessheknow?”
Ana’slaughwaslyrical,andshereturnedtohertaskofwrappingmyarm.“SheknowsIwillnotdrinkfromanyonebuther.ItiswhyshewillonlyleaveforaslongasIcanabstain.”
Again,IfoundmyselfthinkofAdrianandSafira.Hadhebeenloyaltoherinthisway?AknotofjealousytwistedinmystomachasIrealizedhowclosetherelationshipbetweenavampireandhisvassalmustbe.
“Doyouloveher?”Iaskedassheknottedoffthegauze.
Shetookamomenttoanswer,risingtoherfeetfirstandsmoothingherpalmsonherdress.“Ido,”sheansweredquietly.
“Willyouturnher?”
“Shedoesnotwishtobelikeme,”Anasaid,andIsensedanoteofpaininhervoice.
“Butsheisyourvassal.Ithought…”
Ithoughtallvassalsagreedtooffertheirbloodinhopesthattheytoowouldonedayknowimmortality.
“Sheofferedherbloodtoshowmeshelovedme,”Anasaid.“Andthatisenough.”
ExceptthatIgotthesenseitwasn’t.
“Areyousure?”
“Itisadecisionshemustmake,andIwillnotmakeitforher.”
Iconsideredhowtheirsocietyseemedtobebuiltaroundconsent—vampireshadtohavepermissiontodrinkfromvassalsorturnthem.
“IsthatwhathappenedtoSorin?Washenotgiventhechoice?”
“IcannotspeakforSorin,”shesaid.“ButwhatIcansayisthatmanyofuswerenotgiventhechoiceinthebeginning,whichiswhythereischoicenow.”
Ifrowned,thinkingbacktowhatI’dlearnedoftheDarkEra.Wehadbeentoldthatitwasatimeofgreatfear,thatnewvampireswerebeingbornatanalarmingrate.Intheearlydays,theywerenotincontrol,theirfiercehungerovertakinganyhumanity.Iwasn’tsurehowthey’dcometohandletheirdesireforblood,buteventually,thenumberofnewvampiresdecreased.Astheydid,AdrianVasilievrosetopower.
Ihadneverconsidered,though,thehorrorthesevampireshadgonethrough.
IsupposeAdrianwasright.Historywasjustperspective.
Wespokenomoreonthesubject,andIlefttoattendHighCouncil.Themeetingwouldtakeplaceinthewestwingofthecastle,whichhappenedtoalsobewhereAdrianresided.Iwonderedwhyhe’dplacedmeinthesouth—wasittoprovidethedistanceI’dwanted?Orwasitsothathecouldcontinuehistrystsashehadbeforehe’dleft?
Aswewent,AnapointedtoAdrian’schambers.
“Intheeventyou…desirehispresence,”Anasaidaswepassed.Itmademethinksheknewhehadn’tcometomybedlastnight.Ihadtoadmit,Iwonderedwhatwasbehindthosecarved,blackdoors.Didheliveinsimplicity,orwouldhisroomreflecttheextravagancepresentineverydetailofthecastle?
Wecontinuedupasetofstairs,nowtothethirdfloor,whichopenedintothemostbeautifulroomintheentirepalace.Itwasalonghallthatcreatedabridgebetweenonetowerandthenext.Thewallsalternatedbetweenlarge,roundedwindowsandgoldmirrors.Theflooratmyfeetwascarpetedandcrimson,madetolookevendarkerbytheredlightstreamingintothespace.Arowofchandeliers,litwithhundredsoftapercandles,hungdownthecenter,andIwalkedbeneaththem,takingineverydetail—fromdarkpaintingsdepictingtheBurningtoreliefcarvingsofthegoddessesAshaandDis.
“WasthisherebeforeAdrian’sreign?”Iasked.
Ididnotthinkhewouldhavecommissionedsucharttodecoratehispalace,butthenagain,Icouldnotbesure.
“Itwas,”Anasaid.“Hekeepsitasareminder.”
Mybrowsloweredathercomment.
“Areminderforwhat?”Iasked.
“Whyheconquers.”
Wecontinuedwalking,andIglancedatamirrortomyright.JustasIwasabouttowalkoutofframe,Icaughtsiteofsomething—areflectionthatwasnotmyown.Itwasawomanwithgingerhair—thesameoneI’dseeninthereflectionofthewindowatSadovea.
Ihaltedandsteppedback,findingherstaringback.
Icouldseemoreofherfeaturesthistime—lightoliveskin,frecklesacrosshercheeksandnose,fulllips,andgreeneyes.Shewasbeautiful,andasshestaredbackatme,thecornersofherlipslifted.
“Areyouaghost?”Iwhispered.
“Whoareyoutalkingto?”Anaasked.
Iwhippedmyheadtotheleftandfoundherattheendofthehall,waiting.
“Thereisawoman.”Iturnedbacktothemirror,butonlyIlookedback.“Inthemirror…”MyvoicetrailedoffasAnacametostandbesideme.Iblinkedandshookmyhead,confused.“I…musthavebeenimaginingit.”
PerhapsthiswasjustanotherstrangevisionliketheoneI’dhadofAdrianinthegrotto.
Anafrowned.“Come.We’llbelate.”
Thehallofmirrorsemptiedintoalargecorridor.Aflightofstepsinclinedupwardtohigherfloors.Totheleft,thehallcurvedoutofviewwhiletherightledtoasetofdoorsthatreachedtheceiling.Weturnedrightthroughthedoors,onlytobegreetedbyaroomfullofmen.
Mydisgustwasimmediateastheyallturnedtolookatus.Atleasttheybowedatmypresence.TheroomwhereAdrianheldcouncilwasfarnarrowerthanitwaswide.AlargemarblefireplaceframedtheBloodKingashestoodbeforearoundtablewithDaroconlyastepbehind.Inotedhowthehearthwasnotfullofragingfire,onlyglowingembers,andIwonderedifhehaddonethatforme.Therestoftheroomwasjustasextravagantasthehallwe’dexited,withtowering,gildedmirrorsandchandeliersdrippingincrystals.Theceilingwascoveredinafrescothatappearedtodetailthecreationoftheworld.InotedAshaandDis,onedepictedinwhite,theotherinblack,onehaloedbythesun,theotherbythestars,surroundedbythelessergoddesses,theoneswenolongerworshippedinCordova.
Ididnothavelongtoinspecteveryinchofthisroom,asmyattentionfelltothenoblessepresent.Ionlyrecognizedafew—Tanaka,Gesalac,Dracul,andAnatoly.InotedthatCirowasabsentfromthemix,whichwasjustaswell.Hehaddonehispeopleadisserviceandneededtorectifyit.TherewerefiveothermenIdidnotknow,butnoneofthemlookedatmewithasmuchmistrustasGesalac,whosegazemademystomachsour.Iwonderedifhewasthinkingaboutearlierwhenhe’dfoundmeinthegrotto.
MygazeshiftedtoAdrian,whoseemedonedge,hiseyesburningwithaninfernallight.Iwonderedifhecouldhearmythoughtsatthismoment.Ifhewastryingtoguesswhathappenedatthegrotto.
“Howunfortunate,”Isaid,“thatnowomenadviseyou.”
“Youadviseme,myqueen,”Adriansaid.
“Onewomanandninemen—howrevolutionaryofyou.”
IheldAdrian’sgazeasImovedtohisside.Hestareddownatme,andalittleofhiscoldnesshadmeltedaway.
“Yourconcernsarenoted,myqueen,”hesaid.
Tanakaclearedhisthroat,andAdrianshiftedhisattentiontotheoldervampire.“Doyouhavesomethingyouwishtoshare,Viceroy?”
Tanakahesitated,mouthworking.Clearly,hisinterruptiondidnothavetheintendedeffect.
“Uh,no,YourMajesty.”
Therewasastrangesilence,andmyeyesshiftedtoamapthatwasspreaduponthetable,andInotedthreesmall,redpins—oneinVaida,oneinSadovea,andoneinaplacecalledCelCioran.
“Wasthereanotherattack?”Iasked,mychesttighteningatthethought.
“Yes,butitwasnotrecent,”hesaid.“LikeVaida,itwasdiscoveredlate.”
IwonderedifitwasanotheroneofCiro’sterritoriesbutdidnotaskasAdrianjumpedintoanexplanationofwhatwe’ddiscoveredonourwaytotheRedPalace.Ifeltmoreandmoredreadashespokeofthestateofthebodies,ofthehorrorofhearingtheman’sscreamsasheranfromthegatesofSadovea,andthechildwhohadattackedme.
“Achild?”oneofthenoblesseasked,lookingjustasdevastatedasIhadfelt.HisnamewasIosif.Hewasatallmanwithblondhairthatcametohisshouldersandasmatteringoffacialhair.
“Shewaspossessedbywhatevermagicwasunleashed,”Adriansaid.“Anditturnedherintoamonster.Webroughtherhereforanautopsy,whichAnaperformed.”
Myeyeswide,IlookedtoAna,who’dbeenhoveringalongtheedgeoftheroom.Ihadnoideathetaskwouldfalltoher.
“Duringmyanalysis,theonlythingIfoundofnotewasthatherbloodseemedtobecrystalized,”shesaid.“Which,afteralotofresearch,leadsmetobelievethataspellwascast,specificallyoneforsomethingcalledthecrimsonmist.”
Amist.
Itmadesense,consideringhoweveryonehadseemedtoperish,likesomethinghadcoveredtheentiretown,crawledbeneathdoors,andseepedthroughwindows.Still,Iwonderedhowshewassocertainitwasaspell.Couldavampirealsonotpossessthispower?Theycouldspreadplague,sohowwasthisdifferent?
“Whoeveriscasting,however,iseithernotawitchornotgiftedinbloodmagic,”shecontinued.“Ifthespellwassuccessful,everyvillagerwouldhavebeenpossessedbythecrimsonmistjustlikethegirl.”
“Ithoughtallwitchesweredead,”Isaid.
Therewasastrainedsilence,andAdriananswered,“Itislikelyafewsurvived.AndevenmorewerebornaftertheBurning.Witchesarenotcreated,theyareborn.Itisintheirblood.”
Ididnotknowwhattomakeofthisinformation.I’dgrownupbelievingwitcheswereapartofourpast,thatnomorewouldwalkthisearth.Suddenly,Adrianwastellingmethatwasn’tso,whichmeant…wherewerethey?Wasthemisttheirattemptatretribution?
“CouldthisbeRavena?”Tanakaasked,andbesideme,Adrianstiffened.
“WhoisRavena?”Iasked,lookingupathim.Hestaredforalongmoment,andIwasn’tcertainhewantedtotellme,butfinallyherelented.
“ShewasDragos’switch,”hesaid.“Afterhisdeath,sheescapedandhasneverbeenfound.”
Thiswasnewinformationtome.IneverknewthatDragoshademployedawitch.Wasthatnotcontrarytohismission?Thatwasaquestionforanothertime.Rightnow,IwonderedwhysomeonefromAdrian’spast,someonewhohadbeeninhiding,wassuddenlymakingherselfsoobviouslyknown.
“Ifsheisyourenemy,whyattackVaidathen?”Iasked.
“WedonotknowthatitwasRavenawhoconjuredthespell,”saidAdrian.
“WhoeveritwaslikelydidnotintendforthemisttostrikeVaida,”Anasaid.“Ibelievetheylostcontrolofthemagic,whichisalsowhythespellhasonlymanagedtoworkononepersonandkilledtherest.”
“Sothespellisintendedtocreatemonsters?”Iasked,shiveringasIrecalledhowdangeroussomethinglikethiscouldbeifitworked.ThegirlinSadoveahadlookedsoinnocent,andshe’dluredmeinwithnoissue.
“Ithinkitisintendedtocreateanarmy.”
Therewasastretchofsilence.
“Canthemistaffectus?”ThequestioncamefromanoblessenamedJulian.
“Aslongasthemistcanattackthebloodinourveins,Iimagineso,”Anareplied.
Moredread.
Ifthemistcouldsuccessfullypossessvampires,therewouldbenostoppingtheterrortheymightinflict.Theworstpartaboutthiswasthatnoonereallyseemedtoknowwhowasresponsible.
“WeshoulddoubledownonoureffortstolocateRavena,”saidJulian.
Athissuggestion,Adrian’sjawtightened,andIwascuriousabouthisreaction.Thenhesaid,“DoyounotthinkIhavetried,Noblesse?”
“Ididnotmeantosuggestotherwise,myking,”Juliansaid.“It’sjustthatyouhavebeendistracted.”
Itwasthewrongthingtosay.Iknewitinthewaytheairchangedaroundme.Itbecamethickandheavy,andbesideme,Adriantiltedhishead.
“Pleaseenlightenmeastowhathasdistractedme,Noblesse.”
Julianswallowednoticeably,andhiseyesslidbrieflytome.IwasnotsureifhewaslookingtomeforhelporsuggestingIwastheproblem.
“TheconquestofCordovahastakenupmuchofyourtime,YourMajesty,nottomention…yournewwife.”
Alongpausefollowedhiswords,andthenAdrianspoke.“DoyouthinkIlacktheabilitytoconquertheworld,fuckmywife,andsearchforafugitivewitch,Noblesse?”
Iflinchedathiswords,andJuliandidnotanswer.
“DoesanyoneelseagreewithNoblesseJulian?”Adrianasked,andashisgazesweptthecrowd,heleftmyside,comingaroundthetableashetwistedagoldringuponhisfinger.Noonespoke,andasenseofuneasecreptalongmyneck.InotedthewayDaroctookastepclosertome,asifhewerepreparingtowhiskmeawaythemomentsomethinghorriblehappened.Tanakatensed,hisfingerssplayedacrossthemapasiftogivehimaddedsupport.
AdriancametostandinfrontofJulian,toweringoverthevampire.
“ItseemsyouaretheonlyonewhothinksIamnotworthyofthiscrownIwear,”hesaid,andheleanedforward,bothhandsonJulian’sshoulders,squeezing.“Wouldyoulikeit?”
“N-no,YourMajesty,”Julianansweredquietly,hisgazefallingtothefloor.
“Lookatmewhenyoulie,Julian,”Adriansaid.“Itwillmakethisnextpartfareasier.”
Whatnextpart?
ButIsoonfoundout,becausejustasJulianliftedhishead,Adrianclaspedhisfacebetweenhishands.Theringhe’dbeentwistingturnedouttoalsobeasmall,curvedblade,whichheslidrightintoJulian’seye.Mynailsbitintomypalmsasthevampirescreamed,andAdriancontinuedtopushthebladefartheruntilhewrenchedhisthumbfreeandtheeyecamewithit,hittingthegroundwithaslicksplat.
Julianfelltohisknees,rockingforward,holdinghishandstohiseyesocket.ItrembledbutmanagedtoremainsteadyasAdrianspoke,hishanddrippingwithJulian’sblood.
“Neverassumeyouunderstandmypurpose.”Thenheturned,gazesweepingthecrowd.“YouwillallinstructyourterritoriestolightfiresaroundtheirgatestokeepthemistatbayuntilweareabletolocateRavenaorthepersonresponsibleforthespell.Youarealldismissed.”
Thenoblessefiledoutsilently,passingJulianastheywent.AdrianplacedhisbootagainstJulian’ssideandkickedhim.Thevampirefellwithagroantothefloor.
“Getout!”Adrianyelled.
IflinchedandwatchedasJulianscrambledtohisfeet.
“I’dliketobealonewithmywife,”AdriansaidtoDarocandAna,astheystilllingered.
Ilookedatbothofthem,anoteofhysteriaclimbingupmythroat,buttheywerealreadyretreating.Whenthedoorswereclosed,AdrianandIstaredateachother.
“DoyoufeeljustifiedinyourbeliefthatI’mamonsternow?”heaskedafteralongboutofsilence.
“Thatwasindeedmonstrous,”Isaid.“Andallbecausehesaidyoucouldnotmultitask.”
“Itwasn’twhathesaid.Itwaswhathewasthinking,”Adriansaid.
Istiffened.SometimesIforgotAdriancouldreadminds.Andapparentlynotjustmine.
“Andwhatwashethinking?”
“Hecalledyouawhore,”Adriansaid.
“Isee,”Isaid,suddenlyfeelingfarlesssorryforthenoblesse.MyeyesfelltoAdrian’sclenchedhands.Itookastepawayfromthetable,closertohim.
“Heisluckyheleftwithhishead.”
“Whywereyousogenerous?”Iasked.
Adrian’slipstwitched.“Eagerforabeheading,mysweet?”
“Ionlywishtoknowwhyheissovaluabletoyourcouncil.”
“Heisanexcellenthuntsman,”Adriansaid.“Andheteacheshispeopletoliveofftheland.Itisavaluableskill.”
“Andnooneelsecanteachsuchskills?”
“Notaswellashedoes.Notyet,”hesaid.
Whichtoldmehewouldeventuallybeexpendable.
Wewerequietforamoment,andthenIasked,“DoyouthinkRavenaisresponsibleforthemist?”
“Ithinksheislikelyresponsible,”hesaid.“IftheattackonlyoccurredatVaida,Iwouldhavecontinuedtothinkitwasamortalwhohappeneduponaroguespell.Itwasn’tuntilSadoveaIbegantosuspectotherwise.”
“Whydidyounottellmeassoonasyoususpected?”
IthoughtIknewwhy,andithadeverythingtodowithhispast—apastnooneseemedinclinedtotellmeabout.IwantedtoknowwhyandhowAdrianhadbecomethefirstvampire.IwantedtoknowwhyhewassoinvestedintheHighCoven.Iwantedtoknowwhythiswitchwantedanarmy.
Hewatchedmeforamomentandthenanswered,“Iwantedtobecertain.”
Suddenly,heremindedmeofmyfather,butnotinagoodway.
Iwanttoprotectyou,myfatherwouldsayashebarredmefromattendinghiscouncilmeetings,butreallyitwasjustanexcuse,awaytokeepmefromknowingexactlywhatwasgoingonwhilemendiscussedthingslikebarringshipmentsofbluecohoshandsilphium—twomethodsofbirthcontrolforthewomenofLara.I’dbeensoangry,Ihadn’tspokentomyfatherfortwoweeksandonlyrelentedwhenheagreedtoacompromise.Hewouldremovethebanandallowhealerstoadministertheherbs.Itwasnotthebestcircumstance.Healerscouldbebribed,andsome,themselves,didnotbelieveinpreventingpregnancy,butitwasbetterthannoaccess.
“Thatisanexcuse,”Isaid.Evennow,IcouldrecallthemomentIsuspectedAdrianknewsomething—ithadbeenthewayhe’dsethisjawandstaredoffintothedistance.He’dbeenconnectingthepieces,searchingforconfirmation.“Youcouldhavetoldme,butdoingsowouldmeantellingmeaboutyourpast,anditseemsyouvalueitssecrecyoverwinningthetrustofyourwife.”
“Isolde,”Adrianbegan,andtherewasasparkofhurtandfrustrationinhiseyes.
“Don’tsaymyname,”Isaid,closingmyeyesagainstthesoundofit,thewayitburrowedundermyskin.“Just…tellmethetruth.”
Hesteppedcloser.“Youwanttruth?”hesaid.“Ravenamaybebuildinganarmytocomeafterme,buthertargetisyou.”
“What?”
“Yourfathertoldyoutofindmyweakness,”hesaid,alithefingertwiningaroundapieceofmyhair.Myeyeswidenedathiswords—wordsthathadbeenspokenonlybetweenmeandmyfather.Hesmiledatmyreaction,anditwaswicked.“Littledidheknow…itisyou.”Fifteen
IwasnotsurprisedwhenAdriandidnotvisitmybedforthesecondnightinarow.Ispentmostoftheeveningturninghiswordsoverandover.
Ravenamightbebuildinganarmytocomeafterme,buthertargetisyou.
Ididnotlikeadmittingtofear,butthosewordshadaneffectonme,andIwantedtoknowmoreaboutDragos’switch.Why,afterallthistime,wasthiswomancomingoutofhidingtocreateanarmy,anddiditreallyhaveanythingtodowithme?
Yourfathertoldyoutofindmyweakness.Littledidheknow…itisyou.
HowwasIAdrian’sweakness?Hehadknownmefordays,andyetevenIcouldnotexplainourconnection.Sometimes,itwaslikeourbodieskneweachotherandourmindshadn’tcaughtup,andIwasleftreelingintheaftermath.
ThenightcontinuedlikethatuntilIrosethenextmorning,exhaustedwithaheadache.ItwasmadeworseasIheadedintoCelCerediwithVioletaandVesna,whileIsacandMihafollowedbehind.Vesnahadbrokenoutintosong.Ididnotrecognizethelyrics,buttheywerefun,andthebeatwasasteadythrum.
Andwhenthesnowfallsontheground,
I’llcome,mylove,I’llcomeondown.
Downfromthemountainsandintothetown,
Thetownwhereourlovewasfound.
Atfirst,itwasacontainedaffair,withMihasingingalongandIsacclapping,butaswereachedthevillage,othersjoinedin,andVesnabecamethecenterofattentionassheskippedandclappedandsang.Whenshefinished,itwastoaroundofapplause.
Ilikedseeinghersmile,andIhopedshewouldgrowhappierthelongershestayed.IimaginedrelocatinghermotherandsistersheretoCelCerediwouldhelp,thoughIhadyettohearconfirmationofthemovefromAdrian.
“Youhavealovelyvoice,Vesna,”MihasaidasthegirlfellintostepbesidemeandVioleta.
“Thankyou,”shesaid,blushing,andthensighed.“CelCerediissomuchnicerthanJovea.”
Iwonderifshemeantthepeopleoroursurroundings.Ilikedtheuniquenessofthevillage,tobesure.Partsofthetownwerefarolderthanothers.Icouldtellbecausethehomesandshopswereallconstructeddifferently—somehadpinewallsandclayroofs,othersweremadeofwoventwigswiththatchedroofs,otherswerecoveredinplaster.Wewalkedalongacobbleroad,pastcartsofvegetables,freshmeat,linen,andwoolwhilethesmellofroastedporkandmutton,evergreenandtobaccopermeatedtheair.TheywerescentsthatalsoremindedmeofwinterinLara,whichcarriedanostalgiathatsuddenlymademehomesick.
Despitethis,themarketsherewerefarlessexcitingthanthoseinLara.PerhapsitwasbecauseLara’smarketcameonceamonthwhileCelCeredi’swasweekly,butthevillagersalwaysuseditasanexcusetocelebrate.Jugglersanddancerswouldentertainwhileothershopownerswouldhostgamesandcontests.Itwasfestive,colorful,andfun,buthere,therewasastrangemelancholyintheairthatIdidnotunderstanduntilIspottedseveralpeoplestackingwoodintoperfectsquares.
“Arethose…pyres?”Iasked,thethoughtmakingmeuneasy.
“Yes,”Violetareplied.“WeareaweekoutfromtheBurningRites.”
“The…BurningRites?”
“ItistheanniversaryofthenightHighCovenwasexecuted.KingAdrianorderseveryvillagetoburnbrightforaweektomemorializetheirdeaths.Thefiresbegintonight,andthereareeventseverynight.ThemostanticipatedistheGreatHunt.”
“WhatistheGreatHunt?”
“Exactlywhatitsoundslike,”shesaid.“Itisthenightwehuntmonsters.”
“Whatisthepurpose?”
Manyofusdidnothuntmonstersbychoice,itwasnecessity,survival,thoughIsupposedvampiresweredifferent.
Sheshrugged.“Itisasport,”shesaid.“Andthereisaprize.”
“Whatistheprize?”Iasked.
“AplacebesidethekingatthefeastonthelastnightoftheRites.”
Iwasn’tsurewhatIwasmostuncomfortableabout—thecelebrationofwitchesorthefires—butIcouldacknowledgethehorroroftheBurningandtheneedtomemorializetheinnocentpeoplewhohaddiedduringDragos’shunts.
“WhatdoyourpeoplethinkofHighCoven?”Iasked,uncertainofhowthosewhoresidedinRevekkafeltaboutvampiresorwitchesoranythingthathadtodowithKingDragos’sreign.DidRevekkiansviewhimliketheNineHousesdid?Asaherowhohadbeenmurderedbyamonster?Didtheybelievewitchestobecruelandcorrupt?OrdidtheybelieveasAdrianbelieved?Thatthewitcheswereinnocent?
“YouwillfindthatmostofusthinkverydifferentlyaboutHighCoventhanyou,myqueen.”Violetaspokecarefully,butIsensedanedgetohervoicethatshecouldnothide.
“Howso?”Iasked.
Violetahesitated,soIspoke.
“Neverfeartospeakyourtruth,Violeta.”
Shepressedherlipstogetherandthentookabreath,explaining,“SomeofusarethesonsanddaughtersofthosewhodiedduringtheBurning,andthestoriesthatsurvivewithinourfamiliestellaverydifferenttalethanwhatissharedoutsideRevekka.”
“Tellmeofyourancestorthen,”Isaid.“Whowasshe?”
Sheofferedasmallsmilebutdidnotlookatmeasshespoke,choosinginsteadtowatchthecobblesatherfeetaswewalked.
“HernamewasEvanora.ShewasamemberofHighCoven,andshewassentfromherhometoKeziahtoserveKingJirecek.Shewrotehomeoften.Herletterswerebeautiful.EvenwhenIreadthemnow,Icanfeelherhope.Idonotknowifshetrulybelievedinthefutureshethoughtshewascultivatingorifshewasonlytryingtoprotecthermotherfromthetruth.Eitherway,thenightoftheBurning,shewaspulledfromherbedalongwithtwelveothermembersofHighCovenacrossCordovaandburned.”
Ishivered.Icouldnotimagineaworsedeath.
Violetametmygazewhenshesaid,“Doyouknowthewaymyfamilywasinformedofherdeath?Theywoketodiscovertheirhouseburning.KingDragoshaddeclaredthattherelativesofeverywitchshouldbehuntedandmurdered.ItwasareliefwhenKingAdriancametopower.Itmeantwenolongerhadtohide.”
Ihadneverheardthissidebefore,andIhadtoadmitIwasstunned.“I’msosorry.”
TheyweretheonlywordsIcouldfindtospeak.Inside,Ifeltamixofemotions—Iwasconfusedandashamedandangry,andtherewasapartofmethatcouldnotcompletelydisregardwhatI’dbeentaught.Icouldfeelmyselfhangingontothestoriesandthefearofmagic.ItwasnotasifIhadn’tseenitfirsthand—thevillagesofVaidaandSadovearemainedashorrorsinmymind.
Still,thereweremonstersamongusall.Now,IwonderedhowmanyhadstorieslikeVioleta’s.
“Donotbesorry,”shesaid.“Youareherenowandourqueen.Youcanlearn.”
Wevisitedseveralvendorsatthemarket,manygreetingVioletaandevenIsacandMihabyname.ItwasthenIlearnedthatVioletahadworkedinthekitchensattheRedPalacebeforebecomingmylady-in-waiting.Itexplainedwhyshe’dknownexactlywhatwasinthebreakfaststewandwhysheinsistedItryeveryRevekkiandelicacyofferedinthemarket.
“Youneverknowwhatyoumightlike,”shesaid,anddespiteherenthusiasm,Icouldtellthatthevendors,shopkeepers,andfarmerswerenotsokeentoserveme.Theywerepolite,theycurtsiedandbowedandcalledme“YourMajesty,”buttheywereguarded,andsomegavemesharplooks.IwonderedifitwasbecauseIwasn’tRevekkian,becausetheyknewmybeliefsconflictedwiththeirown.Intheend,Itippedeveryonewhogavemesamplesoftheirtreatsanddrinks,andwemanagedtofindfabricforVesna’sclothes.
Wereturnedtothecastle,andVioletatookVesnawithherformoretrainingwhileIheadedtothelibrary.Iwasexcitedattheideaofhavingsomuchhistoryatmyfingertips.Lara’slibrarywasminimal—somelargetomesthathadbeenscriptedbyourlocalhistoriansandabookthatofferedafewdetailsaboutmymother’shome.Evenso,itfeltlikesuchasmallsamplingofaworldwithhundredsofyearsofhistory.IfIwasgoingtobequeenofCordova,Iwantedtoknowmore.Ihadtoknowmore.
Mihaescortedmetothelibrary,forwhichIwasthankful,asitkeptmefrombeingwaylaidbyanynoblesse.
“Howareyoulikingthepalace?”sheasked.“CelCeredi?”
“Thepalaceisbeautiful,”Isaid.“CelCerediisquaint.Ionlyfearthesepeoplewillnevertrulyseemeasqueen.”
“Theywill,”Mihasaid.“Thoughyoucanbeginbycallingthemyourpeople.”
Ihadtheurgetofighthercomment,butIknewshewasright.Iwastryingtokeepeveryoneatadistance,tooafraidImightfindsomethingIliked.
Miha’sremarkmademepaycloserattentiontomysurroundings,andIfoundmyselfappreciatingthepalaceactivityratherthanavoidingit.Servantscarriedheavy,silvertraysstackedhighwithplatesandmetalchaliceswhileotherslitmultitieredcandelabrasandhunggarlandsthatsmelledofrosemaryandsage.ItwaspreparationfortheBurningRites,Irealized.
“Myqueen,”servantafterservantsaid,offeringaboworacurtsy.
Iacknowledgedeach,noddingorsmilingasIpassed,thoughIfoundmyselfmorethaneagertoescapethescrutiny,andfeltarushofreliefasweturneddownanemptycarpetedhallway.Attheendwasthelibrary,whichlaybeyondtwolargeebonydoors,eachinlaidwithcolorfulstainedglass.MihadidnotfollowmebeyondthemasIsteppedintoaroomfullofblackshelveslinedwithembossedbooks.Itiltedmyheadbacktoobserveaglassceilingthroughwhichtheredskylightfiltered,illuminatingfloorafterfloorofoverflowingshelves.
Alargecirculardeskatthecenterofthelibrarywasvacant,andthefirstfloorappearedtobevoidofpeople.Iwalkedalongthefirstfewstacks,tryingtodecipherthelanguagewrittenonthespinesofeachbook.SomewereinOldRevekkian,whichIdidnotknowhowtoreadbutcouldidentifybytheoldercharactersandaccentsovercertainletters.Ispentawhilelookingforfamiliarwordsamongthetitlesandgatheredthatmanyofthesebooksweremythsandhistory.
Anoisesuddenlydrewmyattentionupward.Itsoundedlikeabookhadfallentothefloor,orseveral.Ifolloweditupacrescentofstairsthatwoundtothesecondfloor.
“Lothian?”Icalled.
Differentnoisesfollowedmyascenttothesecondfloor—groaningandmoaningandasteadythud.AsIcamearoundacorner,Ifoundthesource.AmanhadLothianpinnedagainsttheshelvesandwasmovinginsidehim,theirmoansechoingthroughoutthelibrary.Foramoment,Iwastoostunnedtomove,watchingastheman,whowasonlyslightlytallerandjustasthinasLothian,poundedintohim.ThenhetookatuftofLothian’sdarkhairintohishand,pulledbackhishead,andbitdownonhisneck.
Ifledtothefirstfloor,unsureofwhattodo.Ididn’twanttoleave,soIcontinuedmyexploration,endeavoringtoignorethesoundsfromabove.Idiscoveredalineofglasscasesamidthestacks,eachdisplayingadifferentartifact.Oneheldtwodifferentknives,onewhiteandoneblack,eachengravedwiththephasesofthemoon.Anotherheldagoldchaliceinlaidwithfinefiligreeandsmallrubies.Athirdboxcontainedastave,whichlookedmorelikeaweaponwithapieceofpointedboneboundtoitstip.Thefinalcaseheldabooksoworn,theletterswerebarelyreadable,butasIshifted,afaintsilversheenspelledthetitle—TheBookofDis
Itwasaspellbook.
Iwasn’tsurewhatitwasaboutbeingsoclosetoonethatmademyheartbeatoutofmychest,butIwassuddenlyfrightened.IthoughtofthecrimsonmistandRavena.Whywouldwesopubliclydisplayabookfromwhichevilmightspread?
“Whatdoyouthinkofmylibrary?”Lothianasked.
Ilookedup,watchinghimapproach.HewassurprisinglycomposedafterwhatIhadwitnessedinthestacksupstairs.Hisdarkhairwassmoothedback,andthehighcollarofhisblackandsilvertunichidthebiteIknewhehadsustained.
“Itisverybeautiful,”Isaid.
“Iseeyouhavefoundafewofourrelics,”hesaid.
“Theseallbelongedtowitches?”Iasked.
“TheybelongedtomembersofHighCoven,”hesaidandnoddedtothespellbook.“WebelieveTheBookofDisbelongedtoKarmina,theirleader.It’sblank.”
“Blank?”
Henodded.“Webelieveitiseitherareplicaorabookofspellssheintendedtowrite.”
“Evenblank,doyounotthinkitisdangeroustodisplaysuchitems?”
Lothianhesitated,buthewassavedfromansweringasanothermanapproached—thevampirewhohadfedfromhim.Hewasdressedsimilarly,inblack.Hishairwascurlyandstucktohisforehead,andhisthin,palefacemadehischeekboneslookhollowandhiseyesdark.
“Theserelicsgiveusaccesstoourhistory,”themansaid.“Wedisplaythemsothatwe—andothers—mightlearnfromthem.”
Still,Iwonderedifmagicwasthetypeofthingwewantedpeopletolearnabout
Asifhecouldreadmymind,headded,“Secretsonlymaketheworldcurious.Bettertodisplaythantohide.”
“YourMajesty,”Lothiansaid.“AllowmetointroduceyoutoZann.”
Thevampiresweptintoagracefulbow.Ashestraightened,hischeeksflushed.
“Apleasure,”Isaid.
“Zannisanarchivist,”Lothianexplained.“Recently,hehasbeenbusyoverseeingthecollectionandmaintenanceofitemssourcedfromtheruinsofJolaandSiva.”
Iflinched.“Whatwillyoudowiththosematerials?”Iasked.
“KingAdrianisintalkswithambassadorsfromeachHouse.Hewouldpreferpreservingthehistory,ofcourse,unlikepreviouskings.”
IknewhespokeofDragos,butIalsoknewhewasreferringtowhathesawastheinaccuratehistoryoftheNineHouses.
“Andwhatoftheoldhistoryremains?”Iasked.
“Nothing,”Lothiansaid.“Allwehaveiswhathasbeenwrittenwithinthelasttwohundredyears.Anythingthatcamebeforethatwasburnedwiththewitches,includingspellbooks…minus,ofcourse,thisbook,whichcanhardlybecalledaspellbookbutmoreofa…journal.”
“Atravesty,”Zannsaid,andIlookedathimquestioningly.
“Whyatravesty?Arethosenotdangerousinthewronghands?”
Ithoughtoftheattacksonthevillages,thewayaveragemortalswereturnedintokillerswithastringofwordsthathadsomekindofpowerbehindthem.Itwasfrightening.
“Ofcourse,”hesaid.“Butanythingcanbecomeaweaponinthewronghands,evenpeople.Thetruthremainsthatourworldsufferedfarlesswhenmagicwaspresent.Therewerefewerdroughts,lesshunger,andmorepeace.”
Inarrowedmyeyes.
“Wereyoualivethen?WhentheHighCovenoversawmagic?”
“No,”Zannreplied.“Iwasbornmuchlater,butIamanarchivist,whichmeansIhavereadmanyaccountsofthatera.”
“CouldIreadthoseaccounts?”
“Ofcourse,”Zannsaid.
“Whileyoufindthosevolumes,Iwilltakethequeenonatour,”Lothiansaid.
“Perfect.Iwillmeetyouinthegreatroom,”Zannsaid,andwewatchedhislitheformretreatintothebackofthestacks.
Oncehewasgone,IlookedatLothian.“Areyou…hisvassal?”
Heclearedhisthroat.“Yes.Weare…anewpairing.Ithinkit’sgoingwell.”
Iresistedtheurgetosmileashebeganhistouronthefirstfloor.
“Thisistheoriginallibrary.ThefirstkingofRevekkaonlyhadafewdustyvolumesthatamountedtoaworkjournalandledger.Itwashisbrotherwhobeganthefirstcollection.”
“Whoexpandedthelibrarybeyondthefirstfloor?”
“KingAdrian,”Lothianreplied.
“Tomakeroomforhisspoils?”Iasked.
“Ifthatishowyouchoosetoseeit,”Lothiansaid.“Butwehavebeentaskedwithpreservingthem,andwhenthecountriesrebuild,wewillgoinandcrafttheirlibraries.”
Well,thatwassomething.
Thesecondfloorwasdedicatedtobiographies,poems,plays,andfictionalstoriesgatheredfromcountriesacrossCordovaandtheislands.
“DoyouhaveanythingfromtheAtollofNalani?”Iasked,hopeful.
Iknewverylittleofmymother’shomecountry,onlythatwhenpeoplesawthecolorofmyskin,theyknewIwaspartislander.OneofthethingsImournedalongwithherwasthelossofherculture.Iresentedknowingnothingoftheirtraditionsandalwayswonderedifmyloveforthesuncamefromher.Myfatherrefusedtodiscussitwithme,sayingitwastoopainfulforhim.
“Iwilllookforyou,”Lothianpromised.“Andifnot,Iwillsecureasmanyitemsaspossible.”
ItwasthethirdfloorthatheldmostofmyinterestasitwasdedicatedtothehistoryofRevekka.
Therewererowsofblack-boundbooksandrowsofredones.
“TheblackarehistoriesfromtheDarkEra,theredarefromothercountries.”
Lothianledmetothegreatroom.Thefarwallwasmadeupoffloor-to-ceilingwindows;theceilingswerehighandcrownedwithcarvedcrossbeams,andlitsconcesranthelengthoftheroomoneitherside.Alargerectangulartabletookupmostofthespace,anditwastherethatZannstoodwithaseriesofstackedbooksandloosepapers.
“MuchofwhatyouwillfindherearepersonaljournalsofcommonfolkwholivedduringtheBurning,”Zannexplained.“Itisauniqueperspective.One,Iimagine,manywholivesouthofusarenotawareof.”
“Howdidyoucomebythese?”Iasked,pullingaloosepieceofparchmenttowardme.Thewritingwasspidery—longloopsandpointedlines.
“WhentheBurningbegan,itemsthatprofessedcriticismofDragoswereconsideredpropaganda.Anyonecaughtwithsuchitemswasaccusedofsorceryandkilled,sothepeopleofRevekkabegantohidetheirjournalshowevertheycould—withinthebrickoftheirfireplaces,buriedintheirgardens.”
“Dragos’scampaignagainstwitcheswasmostlyjustanexcusetomurderhisenemies,”saidLothian.
IttookmeamomenttomakeoutthelettersonthepageI’dpulledtowardme,butsoonmyeyesadjustedandIread:
Dragos’switchheldanotherReapingtoday.Sheclaimstopossessnomagicandyetprofessestosenseitinothers.Today,shepointedtoanyonewhoaccusedherofwitchcraft,andtheywereallburnedinthesquare.Thesearedarktimes.
IlookedatLothianandZann.
“Dragos’switch?”Iasked.“Ravena?”
“Yes,”saidZann.“ShewasexcommunicatedfromHighCovenforhersupportofDragos’sagenda.Ofcourse,whenitcametotheBurning,heprotectedher.”
IwasnotsosurprisednowthatAdrianhadmadeithismissiontofindher.
Zanntookmethroughastackofitemshe’dpulledfromhisarchives,organizinginformationbytype.Mostofthemwerejournalentriesandletters,andsomeweresketchesdepictingmomentouseventslikethefirstnightoftheBurning.Ifoundithorrific,maybebecauseIfearedfiresomuch,buttheseriesofimagesbeforemewereonesfromwhichIcouldfeeltheterror,womanafterwomanboundandburnedatthestake.IknewfromwhatIhadalreadylearnedthattherewerethirteenmembersofHighCoven,butheretherewereonlytwelvedrawings.
“Someoneismissing,”Isaid.
Lothianlookedovermyshoulder.“Ah,yes.YeseniaofAroth.DragosblamedherfortheHighCoven’sinsubordination,soheforcedhertowatcheachmemberofhercovendie.Shewaslast.”
“Wasshetheirleader?”Iasked.
“No,butshewasappointedbyHighCovenashiscourtadvisor,”saidLothian.
“IthoughtRavenawas,”Isaid,confused.
“ShecameafterYeseniawasimprisoned.Tothepublic,sheclaimedtohavetheabilitytoidentifywitchesbysight,whichmeantshecondemnedanyoneshedidnotlike.Shewastrulyevil.”
“WhywasYeseniaimprisoned?”Iasked.
“Shewasalsosaidtobeapowerfulseer,thoughDragosdidnotlikewhatsheforetold.”
“Whatdidsheforetell?”
“Hisdownfall,”heanswered.“Heresheis.”
Lothianhandedmeanothersketch,andIwasstartledbothbythiswoman’sbeautyandthelifelikewayshewasportrayed.Sheappearedtohavedarkfeaturesanddarkerskin.Herhairwaslongandblackandhereyesmatched,thoughtheygleamedwithalivelinessthatfeltalittleunsettlinggiventhatthiswasadrawingmadeincharcoal.
Shedidnotlookevil,andasmyeyesshiftedbacktothedepictionofthefirstnightoftheBurning,Icouldonlythinkabouttheterrorshemusthavefelt,watchingtwelveofherownperishandknowingthatwasherfate.
IlearnedmoreaboutHighCoven.Inparticular,thenamesoftheothertwelvemembers.EachofthemhadastrengthrangingfromYesenia’sgiftofprophecytomanifestation,mediumship,healing,orshapeshifting.Therewereotherstoo,powersI’dneverheardof,likebinding,whichwastheabilitytotakeawaysomeone’smagic,andbilocation,theabilitytobeintwoplacesatonce,andportalmagic,theabilitytocreategatewaystootherplacesoutofobjectsorfromthinair.Inadditiontotheirspecialization,eachmemberofHighCovenwasresponsiblefortheirownminorcovens.
AmongtheitemsZannhadbroughtweredetailednotesfromHighCoven’smeetings,whichitemizedtheissuestheywerepresentedwith.Inoneinstance,aterribleplaguehitthenorthernpartofRevekka.Ginerva,thehealer,putforthaproposaltosendhercovensintotheterritorytoperformspellstopreventthespreadandhealthoseaffected,butbeforeitcouldevenbeconsidered,YeseniawasmadetoreadthetimelinesanddetermineifHighCovencouldeveninterfere.Somethings,itsaid,werebydivineorder.AfterYeseniaapprovedthemeasure,thecovensetaboutestablishingrules,namelythatOdessa,thenecromancer,wasnotallowedtoreawakenanyofthosewhohadalreadypassed,andGinervawouldbepreventedfromhealinganyonewhowasfatedtodie,whichrequiredtheskillsofYesenia’scoven.
Iwasbeginningtoseehowtheyworkedtocarefortheirpeople,andIstayed,continuingtoreaduntilmyeyesgrewweary.
“HowoftenmayIreturntoread?”Iaskedbeforedeparting.
“Asoftenasyouwish,myqueen,”saidLothian.“Thisisyourlibrary,andIamyourlibrarian.”
“IknewIwouldnotregretdancingwithyou,”Isaid,grinning.
“Thatmakesoneofus,”Lothiansaid.
Welaughed,andIrealizeditwasoneofthefewtimesI’ddonesosinceI’darrivedattheRedPalace.
***
Icouldnotsleep.
Astiredasmyeyeshadbeenwhenleavingthelibrary,Iwasnowwideawake—orrather,mybodywas.Iwasn’tsurewhatitwasaboutthisroomorthisbedorthepersonI’dbecomesinceI’dmetAdrian,butIcouldhardlythinkaboutanythingotherthanhim.Andthistime,itwasn’tjustthoughtsofhisbodyagainstminethatkeptmymindgoing—itwaseverysubtlenuanceofourtimetogether.Itwasthewayhe’dsaidmyname,thathe’dsaidmynameatall,desperateformetohearwhateverhewasn’tsaying.ItwasthewayhetrustedmetotakeonmyroleasqueenwithoutreallyknowingwhoIwasasaprincessoraperson.
Itwashowhekissedme.
Likehepossessedatrue,unnaturalpassionformethatIcouldsomehowmatch,andIdidnotknowwhy.IreasonedthatIfeltthiswaybecauseofallthathadtranspiredsinceleavingLara.Mypeoplehadbetrayedmeandattemptedtooverthrowmyfather,anddespiteonceunderstandingtheirfearandanger,themoreIlearnedabouttheBurning,thelessIcouldexcusetheirbehavior.NotthatI’dbeenabletoreallyforgivethembefore;theyhadreducedmysacrificedowntonothing,justasKillianhad.Didhefuckyouthewayyouwanted?he’dasked.
Once,I’dfeltsuchshame,butnolonger.
I’dmademysacrifice,andnowmypeoplewouldliveinaworldruledbothbymeandAdrian,andIwasnotsorryforit.
Ikickedofftheblanketsandpulledonmyrobe.IfIcouldn’tsleep,I’dreturntothelibrary.Icrackedthedoorandpeekedintothehallway.Thecorridorwasempty,exceptforshadowsthatdancedintandemwiththecandleflame.Afterafewsecondspassedwithnosignofactivity,Islippedoutthedoor,tyingoffmyrobe.
Ipausedatthetopofthestairsasthesoundofrevelryreachedme.Therewassinging,strangegrowls,andmoans.TheBurningRiteshadbegun,anditseemedthecelebrationcontinuedevenintotheearlymorning.Itookafewstepsdownandhalted,duckingsothatIcouldassesstherisk.Below,thetallwindowswerefullofflickeringfirethatlookedmoreredthanorangeasitwasfilteredthroughtheglass.Thedoorstothefrontofthecastlewerewideopen,givingmeaviewofthecourtyardwhereafireragedandpeopledanced.Theairwasheavywiththescentoffleshandbloodandsmoke,tingedwithspiceandresin.
Evenfromthisdistance,Icouldseebodiesbeforethefire—awomantakingamanintohermouth,amantakinganotherintohis.Therewereotherstoo,engaginginvarioussexualacts,andsomewhoembracedinthesamemannerI’dwatchedAdrianholdSafira,andIknewtheyweredrinkingeachother’sblood.
Iftheactwassosacred,whywasitbeingperformedinpublic,Iwondered.Thenagain,I’dalwaysthoughtofsexasaprivateact,andyetamongthesepeople,itseemedtobeaformofentertainment.
ThenIcaughtsightofAdrian,whostoodwithSafiraonhisarm.
Arushofjealousythickenedthebloodinmyveins.HadhesoughthisvassalsinceI’dsenthimaway?Hadhepartakenofherbloodagainstmywishes?Therewasanundercurrenttomyjealousy,astrangefeelingthatheldontomyheart.Ididnotwanttoputanametoit,becauseacknowledgingthatthis…hurt…wasridiculous.HowcouldI,ahumanprincessoftheNineHouses,feelhurtthatavampirewouldbetrayme?
Igroundmyteethandtampeddownthepain.Iwouldnotlethimhavethatkindofcontroloverme.Irosetomyfeet,renewedinmymissiontoexplorethelibraryanddiscovermorefromAdrian’spast.Idescendedthestairs,racingintotheadjoiningcorridorbeforeanyonespottedmefromtheopendoors,exceptthatjustasIwasabouttoroundthecorner,IcaughtsightofDarocandSorin.Iwasn’tsurewhatwashappening,butneitheroneofthemlookedpleased.Darocleanedclose,afingerpointedinSorin’sface,whosejawwassetsotight,Icouldseeitpopping.Whateverwordswerebeingexchanged,Icouldnothearthem,butIsensedIhadstumbledintoafight.
ItookmychanceanddartedacrossthehallasItriedtoretracethepathI’dtakenwithMihaearlier,butthehallwaysbranchedoffinsomanydirections,IwasnotexactlysureI’dtakentherightway.Igothalfwaydownonehallandturnedaround,feelingasthoughI’dgonethewrongdirection.
ThenextrouteItookseemedevenmorewrong.Thewallswereintermittentlyrecessed,andwhileI’doriginallythoughtIwasalone,IsoonfoundoutIwasnotandthatsomeofthealcoveswereoccupied.Amanhadawomanpressedagainstthewall.Hishandwasaroundherneck,hismouththeretoo.Blooddrippeddownherskin.Iwatchedherforamoment—eyesclosed,lipsparted,bodyarchedintohis—shewaslost.Fartherdown,awomanopenlyfuckedanotherwithherfingers.Iwasnotappalledsomuchasuncomfortable.Whatwasthepurposeofthisexhibitionism?Wereothersmeanttowatchormindtheirbusiness?
Ichosethelatter,quicklyturninganothercorneronlytopauseandstareataseriesofportraits.Theywerepaintingsofbeautifulwomendressedinblack.Therewasaninsigniaontheirbreasts,atwelve-spokedwheel,crownedwithadifferentimage.AsIstudiedeachportrait,Inoticedthewheelturned,whichmeantadifferentsymbolcrownedeachwheel.
ThiswasHighCoven,Irealized,andthesymbolscommunicatedtheirpower.
IlingeredbeforeeachpicturelongerthanIshouldhave,giventhatAdrianhadadvisedmenottoleavemyrooms,buttheymademecurious.Somewereyoung,otherswereold,andmostwerein-between.Somelookedlikeme,andIwonderediftheirancestorswereislanders.Otherswerepale,likemountainfolk,butthewomanwhodrewmygazewastheonewhoseportraithungattheveryendofthehallwaywherethecorridorsplitintwo.Irecognizedherbecauseofhereyes—Yesenia.
Shehadstrange-coloredeyes,ashadethatappearedbothvioletandblue.Theywerefringedwiththicklashesthatcastashadowuponhercheekbones.Herhairwasthickanddark,pinnedback,whichonlyservedtosharpenthestructureofherface.Herlipshintedatasmile,andherskinwasawarmbrownthatmademethinkshe’dlivedbeneaththesun.Shewasbeautiful,herexpressionpeaceful.ItwasafeelingIcouldrelateto,afeelingIwantedtorecapture—onethatIhadknownbeforeI’ddiscoveredthisworldwassoharsh.
Again,myeyesfelltothesymbolonherrobes.Thesymbolthattoppedherwheelwasaneye,thesymbolforprophecy.Hadsheknownherlifewouldendinsmokeandflame?Whatahorriblegift,toknowone’sdeath.
Iturned,eyessweepingthewallsagain,recallingthenamesI’dlearnedearlier.IhadnevertrulyseenthemembersofHighCovenaspeople,butheretheywere—beautifulandsereneandreal,notatallviolentorwildasIhadimagined.Theywere…likeme.
“IseeyouhavefoundtheportraitsofHighCoven,”avoicesaid.
IpivotedtofindGesalacwatchingfromadistance,andIshuddered,wonderinghowlonghehadbeentherebeforehe’dspoken.Iturnedfully,staring,hopinghewouldnotlinger.Hadhehopedtocornerme?
Afteramoment,hebowedhishead.
“QueenIsolde,”hesaid,darkeyesmeetingmineonceagain.“Itislatetobeoutsideyourchamber.”
“Andyetthehallsarefullofpeople,”Isaid.
“Vampires,”hecorrected.Predators,Ithoughthemightbesaying.
“Whohavelearnedtheconsequencesofnotleavingmealone.”
IexpectedGesalactoshowhisanger,buthisexpressionremainedthesame,thoughthatwasn’tmuchbetter.
“PerhapsIcanhelpyoufindwhatyouarelookingfor,”heoffered,andIhesitated,unsureofhismotives.
“Icanfindmyownway.”
“Iunderstandyourfear—”
“Iamnotafraidofyou,”Isaid.“ButIdonottrustyou.”
“Likewise,andyetmykingkilledoneofhisownforyou,amortalwomanhemetaweekago.ItisanywonderIamangrythatmysonisdead?”
“Perhapsyoushouldhavetaughthimnomeansno,butIseewhereheinheritedhisinabilitytolisten.”
Gesalac’smouthhardenedintoathinline.
“Idonotwishtobeenemies,QueenIsolde,”hesaid.“Iratherhopedwecouldbeallies.”
“Ifyouarealliedwithmyhusband,youarealliedwithme.”
ThoughIwasnotsocertainhewas.
Heraisedhisbrowandspokeslowly,deliberately.“Areyoualliedwithyourhusband,QueenIsolde?”
“Whatareyousuggesting?”
Heshrugged.“Itisnosecretyoutwoareenemies.Unless,ofcourse,youhavedevelopedafondnesstowardhim.”
“Doyouhaveapurpose,Noblesse?”Iasked,growingimpatientandfartoouncomfortable.
“Imerelywishtocautionyouaboutthecrimsonmist,”hesaid.
“Excuseme?”
Hestared,pointedly,andsaid,“Curiousthatthemistcamesoshortlyafteryourmarriage.IfIwereyou,Iwouldbewary.PerhapsitisAdrian’swayofendearinghimselftoyou.”
“Whatareyousuggesting?”
“Well,whatbettertogainthetrustofyourenemythansavingherpeople?”
Istartedtoprotestthatthecrimsonmistwouldonlyresultinmygreaterhatredforhim,butIconsideredthatGesalacwasright.ThemisthadendearedAdriantomebecauseofhisactionsfollowingthediscoveryatVaida.HehadsentGavriel,Yeva,andCipriantoCastleFiora,andaftermypeoplehadattemptedtheirrevolt,hesentevenmoresoldiers.Still,IdidnotwishforGesalactoknowthatIwasconsideringhiswords.
“Youmakeaboldclaim,Noblesse,”Isaid.
Heshrugged.“WearenotawareofthebreadthofAdrian’spowers.Whoistosayheisnotresponsible?”
Istaredattheman,andthoughIdidnottrusthim,Iwonderedifwhathewassayinghadsometruth.
“Thereyouare,”Sorinsaid.“IthoughtIsawyousneakingaround.”
Gesalacturned,steppingoutofmypathasSorinapproached.Hishandsomefacewasalightwithamusement,butIsensedtensionintheairbetweenus.
“NoblesseGesalac,I’lltakeitfromhere.”
GesalaclookedfromSorintomeasifhewishedtoprotest,butatlast,hebowed,addingbeforeheleft,“Carefulofwhereyouwander,myqueen.”
Iwatcheduntilhehaddisappearedaroundthecorner.
“Bythegoddess,Ihatethatman,”Sorinsaid.
Ilookedatthevampire.“Wherehaveyoubeen?”
Heheldupashandsasiftowardoffmydemand.
“Easy,”hesaid.“I’vebeenbusy.Adrianhasmeonthehunt.”
Onthehunt?
“HaveyoubeensearchingforRavena?”
“Ihave,butIloseeverytrail,”hesaid.“It’slikeshe’sdisappearingintothinair.”
Iraisedabrow.“Isthatyourspecialpower?Tracking?”
“Somethinglikethat,”hesaidwithachuckle.“Whatareyoudoingoutofyourrooms?”
“Iwasheadingtothelibrary,”Isaid.“IguessIgotlost.”
“Didyouever,”hesaid,grinning,hisdimplesdeepening.IlikedSorin’ssmile.“Come.I’lltakeyou.”
IfeltfarmorecomfortablewithSorinandacceptedhisescort.
“Howdidyouknowwheretofindme?”Iasked.
“Doesthewordtrackermeannothingtoyou?”
Iglaredathim,andhegrinned.
“Isawyousprintdownthehall,”hesaid.“You’reluckyIdistractedDaroc,oryou’dbebackinyourroomsrightnow.”
“Wereyou…introuble?”Iasked.
“Yes,andnotinthegoodway.”Ashespoke,histoneshifted,andIheardanoteoffrustrationinhisvoice.
“Whatdidyoudo?”Iaskedasweturnedacorner,findingthefamiliarebonydoorsofthelibraryattheendofthehallway.
“It’swhatIdidn’tdo,”Sorinsaid,comingtoastop.“OrratherthatIwasn’twhereIwassupposedtobe.”
Sorindidnotofferanymoreofanexplanationthanthat,andIthoughtperhapsitwasbecausehewasembarrassed.
Ilookedatthedoors.
“Doyou…wanttocomeinside?”
Hegrinned.“Nothanks,myqueen.Idon’tread.”
Iraisedabrow.
“Kidding,”hesaid.“Ihaveawitchtohunt.”
Beforeheleft,Icalledtohim.“Sorin.”
Hehaltedandfacedme.
“IfyoufindanythingonRavena,Iwanttoknow.”
“I’msureAdrianwilltellyou.”
“Iaskedyou,”Isaid.
Hebowedhishead.“Ofcourse,myqueen.”
Islippedinsidethelibrary,litwithlow,amberflame.
Iwasnotcompletelyreadytoreturntothegreatroomwheremostofmyresearchstillwaited.Instead,Imademywaytothethirdfloorwherethehistoriesoftheworldwereshelved.Itouchedthespinesofembossedbooks,readingthecarefullypaintedtitles.TherewereseveralvolumesofTheHistoryofCordova,oneforeachyearsinceitsincarnationbythegoddessAsha.
IwasabouttochooseabookontheBurningwhenInoticedasymbolonthespineofadifferentbook.Itwasthesametwelve-spokedwheelI’dspottedinthepaintingsofthewitches,anditwastitledHighCoven.Itookthebookfromtheshelf,andwhenIopenedit,Ifoundthatthemiddlehadbeencarvedout,andinsidewasaknife.
Strange,Ithought,takingthebladeinhand.Therewasnothingextraordinaryaboutit.Infact,itseemedcrudelymade;thebladeitselfwascrooked,thehandletoosmall,andyetitwasheavy.Itwouldmakeforanawkwardweapon,andIwonderedwhyitwashiddenhere.
Thenmybodywentrigid,andIspunastwohandslandedoneithersideofmyface.Amanblockedmewithhislargebody.Heseemedfamiliarsomehow,withshort,darkhairandawell-trimmedbeardandmustache.Hedidnothaveanyastoundingfeatures,buthisclothesseemedtomakeupforthat.Heworerich,fur-linedvelvetwithgoldclaspsandacrownuponhisheadthatwasheavilyembellishedwithjewels.
“Shh,”hesaidandgrippedmychin,tworing-encrustedfingerscoveringmymouthsoIcouldnotspeak.“Youwilllisten.Yourcovenwillfollowmycommands,andyouwillbetheonetochangetheirminds,understand?”
Ididnotknowwhathewastalkingabout—mycoven?Evenso,Icouldfeelmyselfglaringathim.
“Andifyoudonot,Iwillkilleverylastoneofyou.Doyouunderstand?Notjustyourcovenbuteverywitchinthisland.”
Therewassilenceasthemanstudiedme,andafteramoment,heleanedcloser,hislipshoveringnearmine.
“Butforyou,itwillbeadifferentend.”Hisfingersmovedfrommymouth,andthenhislipsclosedovermine.Hiskisswasbitterandrough,andashepushedintomybodyandhistongueattemptedtoprymymouthopenwithhis,Ifoughthim,lashingoutwithmyblade.Hestaggeredback.Pressingapalmtohischest,itcameawaybloody.
“Youlittlebitch!”
Hereachedformeandyankedmyhair.
“Iwillkillyou,”hethreatened.
“Killmethen,”Isaid.Ispokethewordsandfeltthereliefofthem—ifhekilledme,Iwouldnothavetobetraymyselformycoven,butevenhesawthetruthofthatwithinmyeyes,andhisholdrelaxedonmyhair.
“No,”hesaid.“Ithinklifeisagreaterpunishmentforyou.”
Hereleasedmewithajerk,andIfellagainsttheshelf,stillclutchingmybloodiedblade.Heglancedatitandlaughed.
“RememberwhatIsaid.”
Inthenextsecond,hevanished.IblinkedandrealizedIwasalone,standingwiththebookandknifeinmyhand,unbloodied.Iturnedinacircle,myheartstillracingfromtheencounterwiththeman,butsawnoone.
Iwastrulyalone.
Icurledmyfingersaroundtheknife,wonderingifitpossessedsomekindofenchantment,butifso,whatwasitspurpose?IcouldnotbecertainwhosemindI’dinhabited,butsomethinginsidemeknewitwasYesenia.ItwasthesameknowingI’dfeltwhenI’dlookeduponAdrian—astrangeconnectionthatIcouldnotdeny.AndI’djustwitnessedDragos,thedeceasedkingofRevekka,threatenherlife.
IwouldhavethoughtIwasimaginingthingsifmyheartwasn’tstillracingfromtheencounterandmyhandstillshaking.
Suddenly,IquestionedjusthowmuchknowledgeIwantedaboutthepast,becauseitwasturningoutthatIknewnothingabouttheworldIlivedin,andIwasangry.AngrybecauseIhadnotknownandangrybecausetheonepersonwhowastellingmethetruthhappenedtobemygreatestenemy.Sixteen
Thenextday,IwassurprisedtoreceivealetterfromNadia.
“Whendidthisarrive?”IaskedVesna,whowasalonewhileVioletaworkedinthekitchenstohelpwithpreparationsfortheBurningRitesfeast.
Vesnahadcometohelpmepreparefortonight’shunt,aneventAdriandidnotyetknowIwouldbeattending.MyoutfitwasfarmorecomfortablethananythingI’dwornsincemyarrivalinRevekka—ablacktunicandleggingswhichItuckedintoknee-highbootsofthesamecolor.Overtheoutfit,Iworeasnugjacketthatwascutshortinthefrontandlongerintheback.
“Justthismorning,myqueen,”shesaid.“Sorinbroughtit.”
Sorin?WashetravelingtoandfromLarawhilesearchingforRavena?Ihadnoidea.
“Wouldyoulikesomeprivacy?Whileyouread?”
Ismiledather.“Please,Vesna.Thankyou.”
IwasnotsurehowI’drespondasIbegantheletter.Ifearedmyownemotionsatthispoint.MyheartandchestalreadyfeltasthoughtheywerebeingcrushedbytheabsenceofmyfatherandofNadia.Iwasn’tsurewhatwouldhappenonceIsawherhandwritingorreadherwords.Therewasalsoapartofmethatfeltdread—wouldsheblamemeforthecoup?WouldshecontinuetoinquireastowhyAdrianwasnotyetdead?
WhenVesnaleft,ItoreopentheenvelopeandunfoldedtheheavyparchmenttofindNadia’sfamiliarhandwriting.
Issi,she’dwritten,andIpressedmyhandtomymouthtokeepfromsobbing.NoonehadcalledmeIssisinceI’dleftLara.
ImustadmitmysurprisewhenoneoftheBloodKing’ssoldiersagreedtocarrymylettertoyou.IsupposeIshouldwaituntilIreceiveconfirmationyouhavereceivedittobeimpressed.Nevertheless,Imissyou.Yourfathermissesyou.Ihaveneverseenhimsoforlorn.Itmakesmeevereagerforyourreturn.CommanderKilliantoldusofyourattack,andIwouldnothavebelievedithadwenothadourownuprising,but,Issi,mydear,itisnotasifthewholeofLarafeelsbetrayed.Therearemanyofuswhotrustyourplanandknowyouhavenotforgottenyourcause.Thinkoftenofus,especiallyyourfather.Heislostwithoutyou.
Iknowyouarecurious,soIwilladdonlythatIhavereadfourbookssinceyourdeparture,andwhileeverypagewasadelight,theyarenothingcomparedtohavingyouhome.
Imissyou.
Nadia
Ireadthroughthelettertwicemoreasatorrentofemotiontorethroughme.Iwascaughtbetweenadeepsenseofguiltandastrangepainborneofmyfather’ssadness.Ihadnotcompletelyabandonedmymission.IwasstilltryingtodiscoverAdrian’spast,hopingitwouldleadtosomegreatrevelation,butthiswasthefirsttimeIletmyselfacknowledgeitwasn’twiththeintentionofdefeat.Iwantedtoknowhim,whichseemedevenmoreridiculousgivenwhatGesalachadsuggestedlastnight.WhatifAdrianreallywasonlytryingtowinmyloyaltybymanipulatingthecrimsonmist?Hadn’thetoldmemorethanoncethathewasamonster?
Theworstpartaboutitallwasthatithadalmostworked.IhadbeguntolethiskindnessandthethingsI’dlearnedaboutHighCovenandDragosovershadowtherealityathand—Adrianwasstilltheconquerorofmypeople.
Istowedtheletter,hidingitbeneaththebookI’dtakenfromthelibrarylastnight.ThenIshruggedonmycloakandpulledonmyridinggloves.
Tonight,Iwouldhunt.
IleftmyroomandfoundAdrianandhiscouncilofnoblesseassembledinthecourtyard,scatteredaroundtheblazingpyre.Ikeptmydistance,haltingattheendofthesteps,thoughIcouldstillfeeltheheatofthefireonmyface.Itwasn’tuntilthenoblessebegantobowthatAdrianturned,eyessparkingatthesightofme.
“Myqueen,”hesaid.“Whatareyoudoing?”
“Joiningthehunt,”Isaid.
Behindthem,afewofthenoblesselaughed.
“Issomethingfunny?”Iasked.
Theirhumorabruptlyended.
“Itwillbealongnight,”Adriansaid.
“I’vehadmanyofthose.”
Hislipstwitched,andhehandedmeShadow’sreins.“Mountup,myqueen.”
OnceIwasseated,Adrianfollowed,andhisbodypressedheavilyintomine.Iwasn’tsureifitwasintentionalorifitwasbecausehispresencehadmoreforcesinceI’dbeendistantfromhimforthelastthreedays.Iletoutaslowbreathtoreleasethetightnessinmystomach.
Itdidn’twork.
“Comfortable?”heasked,mouthnearmyear.
Iturnedtowardhim,aheadyflushrushingfrommyheadandintomythroat.
“NotawordIwouldchoose,”Isaid.
“Hmm.”Ifelthimhumagainstmyback,andinthenextsecond,hesignaledShadowforward,andwedepartedthroughthegatesoftheRedPalace,intothevillageofCelCeredi,followedbyDarocandthenoblesse.
Thenightwasfading,andaswedescended,firesragedinthevillage.Somewerefromthepyres,buttherewereothers,smalleronesdottingthelandscape.Aswedrewcloser,Irealizedtheywerevillagersholdingtorches.
“Willtheyjointhehunt?”Iasked,recallinghowAdrianhadinstructedthenoblessetolightfiresaroundtheirvillagestokeepthemistatbay.
“Theywillwatchfromthegate,”hesaid.
Aswepassedthem,theyjoinedthecrowd,andaswecametotheedgeofCelCeredi,thegatesgroanedopen,partingtorevealawallofdarkwoods.Asweapproached,Adriandrewhisarmtightlyaroundmywaist,andIrealizedI’dunconsciouslyleanedintohim.
“Itisunlikeyoutobeafraid,”hesaid.
“Iamnotafraid,”Isaid.
“AmItoassume,then,thatyoufindcomfortinmyarms?”
Therewasanoteofamusementinhisvoice.Ithoughtaboutgrindingmyassintohisragingerectiontoproveapoint.Thiswasn’taboutcomfort;itwasaboutthefactthatwehadnotfuckedinthreedays,andIwasangryandneedy,andIwantedtotakemyrageoutonhisbodythewaywehadonourwaytoCelCeredi.
ThatwaswhereIwantedtobe,unwaveringinmyhatredformyenemy,nothereinthisspacewhereIhopedhewas…sincere.
“Whatarewehunting?”Iasked,changingthesubject.
“Nowthatyou’rehere,thequestioniswhatwillhuntus?”
Right.Iwastheonewithbloodworthdrainingandfleshwortheating.
Adrianguidedusintothewoods.Therewaslittlelight,onlyamuted,hauntingredthatmadetheskylooklikeastorm.Still,ShadowandAdriannavigatedwellenough.Behindus,thenoblessefannedout,takingtheirownpathsthroughthewoods.
“SorinsaysheishuntingforRavena,”Isaid.“DidyougivethoseordersafterSadoveatoo?”
“Didyoucomeonthistriptofightwithmeortohunt?”heasked.
“Whynotboth?”
“Oneortheother,Isolde,butifyouchoosetofight,Iwilltakeyoubacktothepalace.Iwillnotbedistractedoutherewhereyouaremostatrisk.”
“Fine,”Isaid,feelingalittlesilly.“Nofightingthen.”
Therewasastretchofsilence.
“SorinhasbeenonRavena’strailforawhile,longbeforetheattacksinVaidaandSadovea.”
“Oh.”
Onceagain,Ifeltsilly,andIwantedtodeflect,tofindareasontobejustifiedinmyangerdespitewhatAdrianhadsaidaboutfighting.Butthenhishandhookedaroundmyheadandhislipscrasheddownuponmine.Igroanedatthehungerwithwhichhedevouredmymouth,meteachthrustofhistonguejustashungrily.
Yes,Ithought.This.ThisiswhatIwant.WhatIneed.
Ihatedneedinganything,butthis,Icouldnotdeny,andIwouldn’thavestoppedifitwasn’tforahigh-pitchedscreechthatmademybloodruncold.
“Whatwasthat?”Iasked,pullingawayfromAdrian’smouth.Mylipsfeltrawfromhiskiss.
Adrianchuckled.“Justanowl.”
“Weneedtoleave.”
Owlswereanomenofdeath.
Itwasoneoffewbeliefsmyfatherhadcarriedwithhimfrommymother’sculturebecausehehadseenit—carriagesoverturnedorattacked,squadronswipedout,allmomentsafteranowlcrossedtheirpath.
Thehysteriainmyvoicemusthaveconvincedhim,becausehisbodywentrigidagainstmine.“Okay.”
Butasthewordlefthismouth,Shadowbegantoneighandshiver.Adrianheldtightonthereinsjustasacreaturecameoutofthetreeline.Itwastallandthinwithnailsthatwerelongandsharp,coveredinblood.Itshairwaswetandstringy,shieldingafaceofoverlyexpressivefeatures,includingawidemouthfullofsharpteeth.
Itwasanalp,nodoubtdrawntousbecauseofShadow,whosensedthedanger.
“Isolde,”Adriansaid.“Takethereinsandgobacktothecastle.”
Ididasheinstructed,andheslidoffShadow’sback,landingsoundlesslyontheground.Adriantookafewstepstowardthemonster,butthecreaturedidnottakeitseyesoffme.
“Thiswillnotendwellforyou,”Adriansaid,drawinghisblade.
Thealphissed,wigglingitssharpclaws,andwithoutsomuchasawarning,itlauncheditselfatme.
Shadowbucked,neighingwildlybeforedartingintothedarknessofthetrees,hisfearkeepinghimmovingforward.Allthewhile,brancheswhippedmyface,arms,andlegs.Ipressedmythighsintohissideandpulledthereins,butnothingseemedtoslowhimdown,soIdroppedonereinandgrippedtheotherinmyhands,pullingittowardmyhip.JustasShadowstartedtoslow,hebucked,andasIhittheground,hedartedaway.Theimpactofmyfallstolemybreath,andIlaythereforamoment,fightingdizzinessandasuddenpaininmyribs,untilInoticedsomethingoutofthecornerofmyeye.
Irolledandlookedupintothefaceoftheginger-hairedwomanwhomI’dseeninthereflectionofthewindowandthehallofmirrors.
“It’syou,”Isaid,chokingonapainfulbreathasIrosetomyfeet.“You’reRavena,aren’tyou?”
Ikeptonehandaroundmywaist,butIwasalreadythinkingofhowImightbringherdown.Ionlyhadmyknives,whichmeantI’dneedtogetclosetoher—tooclose.
“Cleverlittlebird,”shesaid.“Thoughyoualwayswere.”
Mybrowsfurrowed,confusedbyherwords.
Hereyesnarrowed,anditmadeherlookcriticalandcold.
“Soithasn’thappenedyet.”
Shespokemoretoherselfthanme.Still,Icouldnothelpasking,“Whatareyoutalkingabout?”
“Adrian,”shesaid.“Hehasyettopartakeofyourblood.”
Ididnotanswerher,thoughIwonderedwhatthathadtodowithher.Butitwasn’taquestionIwaswillingtoaskher.Shewasadifferentkindofenemy,andIfeltlikeanyinformationshemightgleanfrommewouldleadtodevastation.
Thenshelaughed.
“Itisgoodthatyouhavenotchangedmuch,”shesaid.“Samestubborncountenance,sameobviousweaknesses.”
“Whatdoyouknowaboutmyweaknesses?”Iasked,andassheanswered,Iworkedtofreeoneofthebladesatmywrist.I’dprefertoattackherfromadistance,uncertainofwhatkindofharmshemightinflictonceshehadherhandsonme
“Iknowalotaboutyou,Issi,”shesaid,andIflinchedatherwords.“TellmehowconflictedyouarebetweentheloveyouhaveforyourfatherandtheloveyouhaveforAdrian.”
Onceagain,Ididnotspeak,andastheknifecamefreeintomypalm,itbitintomyskin.
Fuck.
Iflinched,andRavena’seyesshiftedtomyhand.Acruelsmilespreadacrossherface.
“Ohgood,”shesaid.“Youarearmed.You’llneedit.”
Irearedbackandthrewmyblade.Itcutthroughtheairtowardher,butjustasitwasabouttohititsmark—theverycenterofherchest—shevanished,andinherplacewasafamiliarface,anoblesse.
“Ciro,”Ibreathedhisnameinshockastheknifelodgedinhischest.Wherehadhecomefrom?IthoughthewasstillinZenovia,butIsoonnoticedsomethingwaswrong.Thenoblessewasdisheveledanddirty,andhismouth,chin,andthefrontofhisrobeswerecoveredinthick,crimsonblood.Hehadbeenfeeding.
“Ciro,”Isaidhisnameagainashestared,motionless,atthebladejuttingfromhischest.
Myvoicedrewhisgaze,andIwishedI’dstayedsilent.
Assoonashiseyesmetmine,IknewIwasintrouble.Hesquattedonthegroundandthenlunged.
Fuck,fuck,fuck.
Hehadbeenpossessedbythemist.Iwascertainofit.
Imanagedtododgehisattack,onlytofeelhisclawedhandsgripthebackofmyneckashetwistedtoreachforme,andhistouchedburned.TherewasnothingIcoulddoagainsthissheerstrength.Heliftedmeupandtossedme.Ilandedontheground,mybackcrackingagainstatree.
Igroaned,alreadyfeelingtearsstainmycheeks.I’dneverfeltsuchpain,andyetImoved.Ihadnochoice.Irolledontomyhandsandknees,andasIgottomyfeet,Cirogrippedmythroat,liftingmeofftheground.Thoughhistouchwaslikefireandmyvisionblurred,Istillmanagedtoshovemyremainingbladeintohisneck.Itriedtocutthroughtheboneandseverhishead,buthereleasedmetoosoon,andIfelltothegroundoncemore,chokingandgagging.
Idrewinraggedbreathsandstoodoncemore,shaking.IwatchedasCironowpulledthebladefromhischest.IguessI’dtaughtwhateverpossessedhimhowtouseaweapon,andashisdeadeyesmetmine,heliftedtheknife,butbeforehecouldstrikeafatalblow,somethingswoopeddownbetweenus—abirdthattransformedintoaperson.
“Sorin,”Ibreathedasthevampiremanifested,hisbacktome.AllIsawwerehispowerfulmusclesworkingasheswunghisbladeandbeheadedthenoblessewhohadnearlykilledme.AsCiro’sbodyfelltotheground,mylegsgaveout.
“No,youdon’t,”Sorinsaid,catchingmebeforeIhit.
Istaredupathisface,butthedizzinessforcedmetoclosemyeyes.
Igroaned.
“Pleasedon’ttellmeyoucantransformintoanowl,”Isaid.
Iheardhimlaugh,butitwasadistantsound,asifhewereinacavern.
“Notanowl,myqueen,”heansweredquietly.“Afalcon.”
Irememberednothingmoreafterthat.
***
Iwokewithmyswollenfacepressedintothecold,stonefloorofacell.
Ittookmeseveralmomentstogatherthestrengthtoliftmyselfintoasittingposition,andevenasIdid,theacheinmyjawmademelight-headed.Iwantedtovomitbuthelditin;openingmymouthwouldjustmakeeverythingworse.
Isquintedintothedarknessandmadeoutthefaint,crumpledoutlineofAdrian.
“No,”Iwhispered.
Helayonhisstomach,handsboundbehindhisback.Hewasjustoutofreachwithinacellbesidemyown.Icrawledtohim,bodyshaking,havingnoenergytoexpendforbreath,muchlessmovement.Still,Imanagedtoreachthebarsandusedthemtopullmyselfcloser,slippingmyhandbetweenthem.Ibrushedmyfingersoveralockofhishair.
“Adrian.”Iwhisperedhisname,brokenandfullofthebloodpoolinginmymouth.
Hedidnotwakeforalongtime,butIsatthereandstrokedthepieceofhairIcouldreach,andwhenhefinallystirred,Ibegantocry.
Itriedtosayhisnameagain,buthestoppedme.
“Shh,”hesoothed.“Iknow,mysweet.Youcannothelpwhoyouare,andIcannothelpwhoIlove.”
Ijerkedawake,inhalingasharpbreathasifI’djustcomeupforair.Myskinwascoveredinathinsheenofsweat,makingmyshiftsticktome.Ithrewoffmyblanketsandthenfellbackintomypillow.
“I’msafe,”Itoldmyself.“Itwasadream.Justadream.”
Butithadfeltsoreal—thecold,roughstoneagainstmyskin,thepainandthethickbloodinmymouth,thefeelofAdrian’shairagainstmybruisedfingers.
EvennowIcouldfeeltheclawsofguilttwistinginmychest,becausethoughIdidnotknowhow,Adrianhadbeeninthatcellbecauseofme.
NowthatIwasawake,IrealizedIwasalsoalone.
Isatupagain,placingmyfeetonthefloor,takinginventoryofmybody.IthoughtI’dbruisedmyribswhenI’dfallenoffShadow,butIwascertainthey’dbrokenwhenCirohadthrownmeagainstthattree.NowIfeltlittlepain,justanache.Itouchedmyneckwherethenoblessehadgrippedmeandswallowedwithoutdiscomfort.
I’dbeenhealed.
IwonderedifithadbeenAdrian’sdoing,sinceAnausedtraditionalhealingmethods.Andifso,wherewashenow?WhataboutAna?I’datleastexpectedtowakeupandfindhersittingwithme,butperhapsIslahadreturned.HadShadowbeenfoundafterhe’ddartedawayintothewoods?
Ihadsomanyquestions.
Irosetomyfeetandpulledonmyrobe.ItriedtoforceawaythehurtIfeltatwakingalone,atdiscoveringthatSorinwasashape-shifter.DidAdriannotcareforme?DidSorinnottrustme?Ipacedmyroom,reasoningthatitwasridiculoustofeelthisway.AdrianhadnotwaitedformetowakeupbecauseIwasfine,andSorinhadnoreasontotrustmebecauseIdidnottrusthim…didI?
Igrowledinfrustrationjustasaknockeruptedatthedoor,sendingmyheartintoafrenzy.
Adrian,Ithoughtandracedtothedoor,onlytofindLothianontheotherside.
“Areyouwell,myqueen?”heasked,andIknewhe’dwitnessedSorinbringingmehere.
“Iam…aswellascanbeexpected,”Ianswered.“WhatcanIdoforyou?”
“Ihavenewsaboutyourmother’shomeland,”hesaid.“MayIcomein?”
“Ofcourse.”Isteppedasideandclosedthedoorquietlybehindhim.Lothiancrossedtothemiddleoftheroom,turningtolookatme.
“IfearIdonothavegoodnews.”
Justtellme,Iwantedtoyellasachasmopenedinmychest,farlargerthantheonemadebyAdrian’sabsence.
“Goon,”Iimplored.
“Icouldnotlocateanytextsonyourmother’speople,mostlybecausetheirhistoryistoldorally.Ithoughttoreachouttosomeoftheeldersthere,but—”
“Lothian,”Isaid.“Gettothepoint.”
“They’reenslaved.Allofthem,”hesaid.“ByKingGherogheofVela.”Seventeen
IfLothiansaidanythingafterthat,Ididnothearit.
Ifeltasurgeofadrenaline,andatthesametime,Ifeltsick.
AndtothinkKingGheroghehadbeenhere.He’dattemptedtobarterwithAdrianforimmortality—withthepromiseofmypeople.Icouldhavekilledhimthen.Icouldhaveliberatedmypeople.
Mybodyshookwithrage.
HadAdrianknown?Hadhesaidnothing?
IturnedfromLothian,toreopenthedoor,andranforAdrian’squarters.
“Outofmyway!”IcommandedasIraceddownthehalls,packedwithservants,vampires,andtheirvassals.
IcouldnotimaginehowIlooked,butIfeltwildandangry,andwhenIarrivedatAdrian’sdoor,Ithrewthemopen,onlytofindSafirainhisbed—oneIhadyettooccupy.
Shewassittingup,nakedandbentsothatherbreastswerepeaked.Withmostofherweightononearm,shetrailedtheotheralongherraisedleg.Hergoldenhair,unbound,teasedherarmingentlewaves.
Obviously,sheexpectedanothervisitor.
“Whereismyhusband?”Idemanded,myfuryrocketing.
Sheflinchedbutswallowedherfear.“Shouldn’tyouknow?Youarehiswife,”Safiraretorted.
Myhandsclenchedatmysides,andIwishedI’dbroughtmyknife.Still,evenasItookasteptowardher,sheshrankbackagainsttheheadboard,andIfeltasmallbitofsatisfactionknowingshewasafraidofme.
“Iamhiswife,whichbegsthequestion—whyareyouinhisbed?”
Itwasanotherslapintheface—wakingaloneafterbeingnearlykilled,andnowthis?Ifhetrulyknewaboutmymother’speople,Iwouldneverforgivehim.
Shelaughed,ahaughtysoundthatmademewanttoshatterherteeth.
“Ihavewarmeditforthreenights,”sherepliedsmugly,asifitweregossiptospread.
TherewasapartofmethatdidnotbelieveherbecauseIwantedtobelieveAdrian.Iwantedtotrusthim.Thenagain,Iwasnofool.TherewerefewmenwhowoulddeclinewhatSafiraoffered,butallIcaredaboutwasthatmyhusbandhad.
“Don’ttakeitpersonally,myqueen.ItwouldbeimpossibleforonewomantofulfilleveryoneofAdrian’sdesires.Luckily,manyofusareupforthechallenge.”
“Yougrosslyunderestimateme,Safira.Worse,though,isthatyouhavemadeAdrianintosomethingheisn’t.”
“Andwhatisthat?”
“Agod,”Irepliedandleft.
IhadoneguessastowhereAdrianmightbe,andthatwaswithhisadvisors,likelydiscussingRavena’ssuccessfulcorruptionofCiro.Iwassuretobeanunwelcomepresenceamongthenoblesse.Only,Ididnotcare.Iflewdownthecorridors,myfeetcarryingmeasiftheywerenotmyown,andburstthroughthedoorsofAdrian’scouncilchamber.
HestoodattheheadofhisroundtablewithDaroconhisright,surroundedbywhatremainedofhisnoblesse.MygazecaughtandheldAdrian’s,andItooktwomorestepsintotheroom.
“Leave.Iwishtospeaktomyhusband.”
Therewasabeatofsilence.Noonemoved,andIthoughtforasecondIwouldhavetorepeatmyself,orworse,Adrianwouldnotsupportmeinmyinterruptionofwhateverthiswasandforcemetoleave—adecisionthatwouldnotbodewellforhim.Butthentheroomcleared.IheldAdrian’sgazeaseachnoblessepassed.EvenDaroc’s—whichwaspointedandheavy—didnotfazeme.
Finally,thedoorclosedbehindme.
“TowhatdoIowethepleasureofyourvisit?”
Ididnotevenknowwheretobegin.
“Didyouknowmymother’speoplewereenslavedbyKingGheroghe?”Icouldbarelyfinishthesentence;Iwasinsomuchdistress.“Thosearemyauntsanduncles…maybeevenmygrandparents.”
Allthistime,I’dbeenlefttowonderiftheycaredaboutmymother,iftheycaredthatIevenexisted,butitwaspossibletheydidnotevenknowIlivedorthatmymotherhaddied.
“Isolde—”
“Didyouknow?”Myscreamwassoloud,myvoicewenthoarse.
Hissilencespokevolumes.
“Youbastard!”Isaid,clenchingmyjawsohard,myteethhurt.Tearsblurredmyvision.
“Whatwouldyouhavemedo?”hecountered.
“Freethem!”Iyelled.“KillKingGheroghe.DoyounotplantoconquerVelaanyway?”
“Itisonthelist,Isolde,butitisnotthepriority.”
Iflinched.“AreyousayingIamnotyourpriority?”
“Ineversaidthat.”Hespokewithsuchreverence,mybloodrancold.“Icareaboutyou,farmorethanyouwilleverunderstand,butIcanonlydosomuch.Ionlyhavesomanymen.NottomentionI’mconcernedaboutthecrimsonmistattackingourpeople.”
Hiswordstookmostofthefightoutofme.Still,Irallied.
“Recruitmoremen,”Isaid.
Hetiltedhisheadandhislipstwitched.“Areyoutellingmetoturnmorepeople?”
Iswallowedhard.Iwasforgoingallmyvalues.Tonight,I’daskedAdriantoattackakingdomoftheNineHouses,andI’daskedhimtoturnmortalsintovampires.I’dfallensolow,andIdidn’tcare.
“Iunderstandyouranger,”hesaid.“IamnothappywithKingGherogheeither.EvenifhehadsomethingIvalued,Iwouldnotofferhimimmortalityforhiscrimes.Hisendwillcome,anditwillbebyyourhand…ifyouarewillingtoactasaqueen.”
“Andhowdoesaqueenact?”Iasked,furystillcoursingthroughme.
“Everythingmustbestrategic,andnothingcanbepersonaluntilvictoryisnear.Doyouunderstand?”
Hewastellingmewehadtoplan.HewastellingmeIhadtowaittofreemymother’speople—mypeople.CouldIhandletheguiltofmyownfreedom?Ofmyownprivilege?
“Everyonewillwantyoursacrifice,Isolde.Bemindfulwhogetsit.”
“Whogetsyours?”
“Doyoureallyneedtoask?”hesaid,hisvoicequiet.
Ididneedtoask,becausehe’dleftmetowakeupalone,becausewhenI’dgoneinsearchofhim,I’dfoundSafirainstead.
“Ijustcamefromyourroom,”Isaid,andAdrian’sbrowsrose,morecuriousthanalarmed.
“Andwhatwereyoudoingthere?”
“Lookingforyou,”Ianswered.“ButdoyouknowwhatIfoundinstead?”Icouldnotevenwaitforhimtoanswer,Iwassoangryalloveragain.“Safira.Naked.Inyourbed.Sheclaimstohavebeentherethelastthreenights.”
Adrianstiffened.“Andyoubelievethis?”
“YoudonotgettoaskmewhatIbelieveordonotbelieveatthispoint,YourMajesty.Yougettoexplain.Now.”
AskingforanexplanationdidnotmeanIdidnottrusthim,butIdeservedoneallthesame.Especiallyconsideringallhe’dkeptfromme.Hestaredatmeforalongmoment,andIwonderedifhewasreadingmymind.Weremyemotionsstrongenough?Weretheytoochaoticforhimtodecidewhattofocuson?Afteramoment,hemovedfrombehindthetable,andonhiswaypastme,hesaid,“Iwilldomorethanexplain.”
Hestrolledoutofthecouncilroom,shovingthedoorsopenwithaloudbang.Ifollowed,unflinching,notinghisstiffshouldersandclenchedhands.
“Daroc,Irequireyourassistance,”hesaidwithouthaltinghisstride.Hissecond-in-commandhadwaitedoutsidetheroom,andIwonderedifhe’dbeeneavesdropping.Hescrambledafterus,glancingatme.
Adrianmovedsoquick,Icouldbarelykeepup.Hispeople—thoseI’dhadtocommandtogetoutofmywayearlier—movedtothesideforhim,andIdidnotknowifitwasoutoffearorrespect.Eitherway,itstunginawaythatmademewanttoincineratethiswholecastle.
Asweapproachedhischambers,AdrianorderedDaroctoremainstationedoutsidewhileheflungopenthedoors.
“Getup!”hesnappedasheentered.IfollowedbehindhimandwatchedasSafirascrambledtoherfeet,draggingAdrian’ssheetwithherassheheldittoherchest.
“Mylord—Ionlythought—”
“Silence,”hecommanded,andhermouthshut,herfacepaled.
Adrianturnedtomethenandheldouthishand.Ittookmeonlyasecondtoaccept.
“I’vebeeninformedthatyouaresuggestingI’vebeendisloyaltomywife,”Adriansaid.
Safiragaveanervouslaugh.“HerMajestymisunderstood.Iwasonlyspeakingofourpast—”
Istiffened,angeredbyhersuggestionthatthiswasjustamisunderstanding.ButAdriansqueezedmyhand,andthemovementwasstrangelyreassuring.Ittoldmehebelievedme.Alittleofmyangerreceded.
“Areyousayingmywifeisaliar?”Adrianasked.EvenIwasunsettledbythetoneofhisvoice.
Safira’seyeswidened.
“Ofcoursenot,YourMajesty.Iamsayingthishasallreallybeengreatlyexaggerated.”
“Isee.Ifthatisthecase,youwillthinkmypunishmentismostsevere.Daroc,”Adriancalled,andthecommanderentered.“EscortSafiratothedungeons.”
Safirabackedaway,bumpingintothewallasDarocapproached.
“Adrian,please!”shebegged.
“It’sonlyashortwhile.Whynotonedayforeverynightyouclaimedtosleepwithme?”
Darocyankedthesheetfromherhandsandgraspedherupperarm,draggingherfromtheroom,naked.
“Ididnotmeananyharm,”shesaid,strugglingagainstDaroc’shold.“Ibegyou.”Neitheroneofusspokeasshewastaken,thedoorsclosingonherfinal,desperatecry.“Youcan’tdothis!”
Adrianturnedtowardme.“Areyoureassuredbymyfidelity?”heasked.
Ablushwarmedmycheeks.IfeltsillyforneedingthiscomfortandyetmoreconfidentthanI’deverbeeninhisloyaltytome.
“IamsorrythatIneededit,”Isaid.“Isupposethat’sanotherwayIamnotactingasaqueen,butitseemsthateveryoneinthiscastlewishestoremindmeIwasnotyourfirstandnotsufficientenoughtobeyourlast.”
“Iwillbethejudgeofthat,”Adriansaid,andhetuckedastraypieceofhairbehindmyear.“Ididnotintendforyoutowakealone.”
Ifeltasuddenrushofembarrassment.“Itwasselfish,”Isaid.“Ofcourse,youhavemoreimportant—”
“Nothingismoreimportantthanyou,”hesaidandbrushedhisthumbalongmylips,sendingashiverofarousalthroughme.Wehadbeendistantforfourdays,andthewholetime,I’dbeendesperateforhim.Ionlyletmyselffullyacknowledgeitnow—thewayIhadwantedhim,hisbody,hisreassurance,hismind.
Hestaredatmewithasoftadmirationinhiseyes.“Needsomething,Sparrow?”heasked,raisingabrow.
“Canyounotreadminds?”Iaskedquietly.
“That’snothowthisworks,”hesaidandbackedaway,sittinginthechairnearhisdesk.
Iwantedtochasehiswarmth,butIstayedwhereIwas,demanding,“Whatareyoudoing?”
Heshrugged.“Takewhatyouwant.”
Mybodyliterallyquaked.Iclenchedandunclenchedmyfists.
“Ican’tfuckyoufullyclothed.”
“Debatable,”hesaid,andacoolsmilespreadacrosshislips.
“SometimesIreallydohateyou,”Isaid.
“Onlysometimes?”heasked,voicequiet,andthenhetiltedhisheadtotheside.“Andrightnow?Doyouhateme?”
Islippedoutofmyrobeandpulledmyshiftovermyhead,standingnakedbeforehim.Hiseyesgleamed,buthedidnotmovetotouchme.
“No,”Ianswered.
Myhandscamedownuponhisshoulders,andIstraddledhim,takinghismouthagainstmine.Mybodywassuddenlyfloodedwithfeeling.Itwasarushthatfilledeveryveinandeverynerve.Myhandswoundintohishair,andIgroundagainsthislength,buriedbeneathlayersofclothing.
“Atruthfromme,”hesaidagainstmylips.“Imissedyou.”
Hisfingerspressedintomyhips.Hesatforward,onehandmovingbetweenustocapturemybreastwhilehislipsleftminetotrailmyjaw,mythroat,andthenclosedovermynipple.Iinhaledbetweenmyteethandgraspedhisface,holdinghimthereashelavishedmyskin.Itfeltgoodtobetouched—betterbyhim.
Ipushedhisvestfromhisshouldersandyankedonhisovercoat.
“Takethisoff!”Idemanded,andhechuckled.
“Amoment,Sparrow,”hesaid,andIshiftedoffhim.Hestood,andIhelpedhimundress,unlacinghispantsasheshedhisovercoatandtunic.Oncehiscocksprangfree,Igraspedit,uncaringthathehadyettocompletelyshedhisleggings.Hegroanedandyankedmeforward,tonguedevouringasIcoaxedbeadsofcomefromthetipofhiscockwithmyfistuntilIpulledawayandkneltontheground.
IheldhisgazeasItastedhim,hisfleshsoftandsaltybeneathmytongue.Beforemymouthcouldcloseoverhim,hesat,hishandsbracedonthearmsofhischair.
“Ithinkaboutyourmouthalot,”hesaid.“Thethingsyousayandwhatyoudowithit.”
“VeryfewpraisemeforwhatIsay,”Isaid.
“Perhapstheydonotvaluethetruth.”Heleanedforwardjustalittle,hishandtanglinginmyhair.“Sotellmeatruthnow—youfearwhatyoufeelwhenyouarewithme.”
Istaredathim.
“Youfirst,”Iwhispered.
Hesmiled.“IhaveneverbeenafraidofwhatIfeelforyou.”
Itookhimintomymouth.ItwastheonlykindofanswerIwaswillingtogiveatthemoment,andAdrianletme.Itouchedeverypartofhim,tongueslidingbeneaththecrownofhiscockandtheveinsrunningdowntheshaft.Myfingersteasedhisballs,heavywithneed.Ikeptmypace,aslowandsteadybuild,evenashegroanedandgrowledoverme.Whenhecame,Ikepthimthereamomentlonger,lettingthepressureofmylipsglideagainsthimuntilheslippedfrommymouth
HestaredatmeasIsatbetweenhispartedknees,mylipswetfromhisrelease.
“Canyouhandleme?”Iasked.
Hesmiled.“Sparrow,Iwilltakewhateveryougive.”
Irosetomyfeetandturned,givingAdrianmyback,andbentacrosshisdesk.Heseemedtounderstandmywordlessinvitationashishandpartedmyflesh,hisfingersdivingintothesilkenskinthathadgrownwarmandwetwhileI’dfeasteduponhim.Thefeelofhimtherewasakindofreleaseallonitsown,andIgaveagutturalcry.Myhandssoughthisfleshandlandedononeofhisthighs.Adriandidnotseemtomind,spendingafewmoremomentsinsidemebeforehepulledhisfingersoutandsat,guidingmedownuponhiscock.Hewasengorged,andasheslidinside,Ifelteveryriseanddipofhisshaft.
“Yes,”hehissed,shiftingmeclosertohim,sealingmybacktohischestasIbegantomove.Hishandsgaveattentiontomybreasts,squeezingandkneading.Itwasn’tuntilheshiftedtoteasemyclitthatIneededtoanchormyselfagain,movingmylegsoneithersideofhis.Itgavemegreaterpurchase,andIrockedharderandfaster,turningmyheadtowardhis.Ourmouthscollidedinamessy,hardkiss.Ourbodieswereslick,andtherewasaheatbetweenusthatwarmedmycheeksandexplodedinthepitofmystomach.WhenIcouldnolongermove,Adriangatheredmeintohisarmsanddepositedmeonthebed.Hehoveredoverme,breathinghard,piecesofhislong,blondhairstickingtogetherinsweatyclumps.
“Areyouallright?”heasked.
“Morethan,”Ireplied,quietandsated.
Hestareddownatme,smoothingmyhairfrommyface.
“JustwhenIthinkyoucouldnotgetanymorebeautiful.”
Itseemedthathehadmoretosay,butheremainedquiet,onlytracingmyfacelightlywithhisfingertip.
HehadpositionedusinthesamemannerthenightI’daskedhimtoleave—whenI’dfelttooclosetohimandhadwanteddistance.Mylegswerebent,hislengthpressedintomybottom.Imighthavelethimhavethisposition,buttonight,Ifeltlikebeingincontrol.
Iplacedmyhandsuponhisforearmsandguidedhimtohisback,pinninghimbeneathme.Iwastired,butIlikedthefeelofhimunderme,likedthewaymyhandssplayedacrosshischest.
“Whatdoyouwant,wife?”Adrianasked,staringupatmewithheatinhiseyes
“Thewomenofyourcourttookpleasureintellingmehowyoufuck,”Isaid,andIreachedbetweenusforhiscock,guidingittomyheat.“AsifIdidnotknow.”Iimpaledmyselfuponhim,tiltingmyheadbackuntilIwascompletelyfilled.OnlythendidImeethisgaze,andasIspoke,Ibenttopressakisstohischest.“Thenexttimetheylookatyou,Iwantthemtoseeyourlustformeinyoureyes.”
WemovedtogetheruntilIcouldnotmoveatall,untilallIcoulddowasclingtoAdrianashemovedforbothofus.Westaredateachother,ourbreathsminglinguntilheclosedthespacebetweenusandkissedme—deepandbruisingandlanguid.Whenhepulledaway,hewhispered,breathless,“Comeforme.”
Histhrustsgrewharder,rougher,andtheytookmeovertheedge.Notlongafter,hefollowed.
WelaytogetherinsilenceforalongwhilebeforeAdrianspoke.“IfearedIhadtrulyhurtyou,”hesaid.
Hedidnotneedtogiveanymoredetails.Ialreadyknewwhathemeant—thenightI’daskedhimtoleavemyroomwithoutexplanation.
“No,”Isaid,andnothingmore.Itrailedmyfingersalonghischest,overraisedscarsthatnippedathissides.
“Lothiantellsmeyouhaveenjoyedthelibrary,”hesaid.
“Yes.”
“Whathaveyoulearned?”
“Thingsthatscareme,”Isaid.
“Doyoumeanthatyouhavelearnedthetruth?”heasked.
Ispentafewmomentstracinghisskinandthenlookedathim,mychinrestingonmyhands.“LothianandZannintroducedmetolettersandjournalsfrompeoplewhohadlivedduringDragos’sreign.Ididnotknow.”
TherewassomethinghopefulinAdrian’seyesashestaredatme,andheliftedhishandtobrushhisthumbagainstmycheek.
“Youknownow,”hesaid.
“Ravenadoesnotmakeiteasytotrustmagic,”Isaidandpaused.“Isawherinthewoods.”
Beneathme,Adrianstiffened.“Whatdidshesay?”
“Nonsense.”Evennow,Itriedtorecallherwords,buttheyescapedme.I’dbeentoofocusedonplanninghowIwasgoingtokillherforanyofthemtostick.“Whatdidyoudotoher?”
“Ionlytookwhatshestolefromme,”hesaid.
“Andwhatwasthat?”
“Afuture.”
IhadmorequestionsandmorethingstotellAdrian,likehowI’dalsoseenRavenainthewindowatSadoveaandinthehallofmirrors,butaknockatthedoorinterruptedus.
“Notnow,”Adriancalled.
“YourMajesty,it’surgent,”Darocsaidfromtheothersideofthedoor.
Weexchangedalook,andIpushedoffhim,draggingtheblanketuptomychest.
“Enter.”
Therewasaclickasthedooropened,andDarocwalkedintoview.Hisfaceremainedperfectlystoicashespoke.“We’vehadanotherattack,”hesaid.“AtCelCera.”Eighteen
Dreadtoremychestintwo—IhadheardofCelCerabefore.ItwasthehomeofAna’svassal.
“Adrian,”Isaid.“Islawascomingbackfromthere.”
AdrianlookedtoDaroc.“Werethereanysurvivors?”
“Noteveryoneisaccountedfor,”heanswered,butthatwasnotapromisingsign.Itmightmeantheylivedbutthattheywerepossessedandwerenowwanderingthewoodsinsearchofprey.“Sorinisstillsearching.”
Iswallowedhard.
“Sendmoresoldiers,”Adriansaid.“Butonlythosewhofly.Theyhaveabetterchanceofescapingthemist.”
Ilookedathim,surprised.“Howmanycanfly?”
Heshrugged.“Aboutthirtyorso.”
“Aretheyallfalcons?”
“No,”hesaid.
InowwonderedjusthowmanytimesI’dseenahawkorbatcirclingintheskyonlyforittobeavampire.
“Andifwelocateanyoneinfected?”Darocasked.
“Theymustbekilled,”Adriansaid.
Ifeltsick,butIknewAdrianwasright.Darocbowedandleft.
“SomeonemusttellAna,”Isaidoncewewerealone.
“Iwill,”Adrianvolunteered.
“Letmegowithyou.”
Adriandidnotprotest,andweroseanddressedquickly.IhadneverbeentoAna’squartersbefore,butsheresidedintheupperlevelofthewesttower,andwhenweknockedonherdoor,sheansweredwithasmilethatdroppedinstantly.
“No,”shesaid,shakingherhead,alreadyguessingwhywe’dcome.
ItwasAdrianwhocaughtherasshecollapsed.
“Ana,”hesaid,explainingtheattackandsmoothingherhair.Finally,headded,“Shemayyetlive.”
Andasshesobbedinhisarms,shebegged.“Donotkillher,Adrian,please.”
***
“Youlookstunning,”Vesnasaid,drawingmyattentionfromthemirrorasVioletafinishedlacingmygownfortonight’sfeast,thefinalnightoftheBurningRites.Itremindedmeofwater,twiningwavesofwhiteandsilverthattraileddownmybodyanddraggedthefloor.Thesleeveswerelong,butthenecklinefellofftheshoulder,adornedwithicy,laceflowersthatmatchedthefloralcrownatopmyhead.Myhairwaspulledtooneside,trailingovermyshoulderinthickwaves.Apairofsilveryearringsdangledfrommyears,andIstaredatthemnow,thinkingofAna.
Wehadspenttheremainderofthenightwithher.Shehadneverstoppedcrying,neverstoppedaskingAdriannottokillIsla.
Ifsheispossessed,letmekeepher.Iwillfindacure.
Andhewouldanswer,Shemayyetlive,Ana.
Wehadlefthertosleepandwithnonewsaboutherlover.
Evennow,myeyesburnedwithherhurt.
AsIhadwatchedher,Irealizedshewaslivingmyfear—losingtheonesIlovedmost.Now,IconsideredhowsafemyfatherwouldbeonhisjourneyfromLaraheretotheRedPalaceformycoronation.Adrianhaddispatchedmoreguards—butthatmeantthepossibilityofmoreinfectedvampires.
“Isolde?”Violetacalledmyname,andIlookedather.
“Hmm?”
“Iaskedifyouwereallright,”shesaid.“Youlookalittle…sad.”
Iclearedmythroatandswallowedthetearsthathadbuiltthere.“Iamwell,thankyou.”
Shedidnotbelieveme,butitdidnotmatter.Therewasnothingtobedoneaboutmyfear.
“Weshouldgo,”shesaid.“Wewillbelate.”
Butassherosetoherfeet,therewasaknockatthedoor.
“Areyouexpectingavisitor?”Vesnaasked.
Ishookmyhead,butthenthedooropened,andAdrianfilledthedoorway,adarkshadowthatcutthroughthefirelight.Ourcontrastswerenotlostonme.HeembodiedeverythingI’dimaginedtheBloodKingtobe—aloomingdarkness,bothbeautifulanddreadful.Istaredathim,andmychestexpanded,fullofatypeofanxietyIdidnotwanttoadmit.Itwastheanticipationofhistouch,ofthewordshewouldwhisperinmyearlaterwhenwewerealone.
“Myking,”VioletaandVesnasaidinunison.
“Iwantedamomentwithmyqueen,”hesaid.
“Ofcourse,”Violetasaid.“Wewerejustleaving.”
ShereachedforVesna’sarm,loopingitthroughherownastheyleft,andIcouldn’thelpsmilingathowcomfortablethewomanhadgrowninhertimeasmylady-in-waiting.
Adrian’seyesdarkenedasthedoorclosed.
“Sparrow,”hesaid,hisvoicewarmingtheverybottomofmystomach.Hetookmyhandinhisandbrushedhislipsalongmyfingers.“Youlookbeautiful.”
“Yououtdidyourselfonthegowns,”Isaid.“Ihaveneverhadsuchbeautifulpieces.”
“Ionlywishtospoilyou,”hesaid.“Thoughyoulookbeautifulinanyform—coveredinbloodorwrithingbeneathme.”
Ihatedblushing,andhere,onceagain,Iwas.Iswallowedthickly.“HowisAna?”
Adrian’sexpressionchanged,growingserious.“Unwell,”hesaid.“Butshewillbeinattendancetonight.Sheneedsthedistraction.”
Mychesttightened.
“Violetasaidwewererunninglate.Ifwelingerheretoolong,wewillbeverylate.”
Adrianraisedabrow.“Areyoueagertoberidofme,myqueen?”
“N-no.Imean…”Istumbledacrossmywords,irritatedbyhowflusteredIfelt.ItwasmadeworsebyhowAdriansmiledatme—kindandgentle.Itmadehiseyescrinkleatthesides,andIfeltlikeI’dbeenknockedinthechest.Iclearedmythroat.“Youwantedamomentwithme?”
“Iwantyouforlifetimes,”hesaid,brushinghisknucklesalongmycheek.“ButIshallbecontentwithnow.”
Iheldmybreathuntilhedroppedhishandandsteppedaway.“Iwanttoshowyousomething.Willyoucome?”
“Ofcourse,”Isaidandfollowedhimoutofmyroom,intothecorridor.Hetookmyhand,lacingourfingers.Itwasdifferentfromhowweusuallywalked,andpartofmeworriedthatifanyonefromhomesawthis—ifmyfatherwitnessedus—hewouldbesodisappointed.
Adriantookmeintotheeastwing.Itwasthetallestpartofthecastleandhappenedtoalsobewherethelibrarywaslocated,butwepassedthosedoors,headingdowndarkenedhallwayswithgildedaccents,upflightsofstairsuntilwecametotheroof.
Atopthecastle,thewindgustedaroundme.Wewereupsohigh,IfeltasthoughIcouldreachoutandtouchtheclouds,whichwererimmedinaredlight,castingthewholeofRevekkainastrange,crimson-tingeddarknessthatwasbothbeautifulandhaunting.Fromhere,thehorizonseemedtostretchformilesinalldirections—beyondCelCerediandtheStarlessForesttotheGoldenSea.
“Totheedge,”hesaid,andIhesitated.Iwasn’tcompletelysurewhy,perhapsbecausetherewasnorailtoholdontoagainstthewind.Adrianlookeddownatmeandfrowned.“Iwon’tletyoufall.”
IwonderedifhetookmywaveringasasignthatIdidnottrusthim.
Butthatbroughtupanotherthoughtthatwasfarmoredisconcertingtome.WhenhadIgrowntotrustAdrianAleksandrVasiliev?
Igrippedhisarmaswenearedtheedge,andIlookeddownoverourkingdom,wherehundredsoffiresburnedacrosstheland.Ihadnoideathereweresomany.Itlookedsoominous,asifwewereonthecuspofbattleandthefireswereamarkofhowoutnumberedwetrulywere.
“ThenightHighCovenwasmurdered,theworldlookedjustlikethis,”Adriansaid.
Ilookedathimashewatchedtheflamesconsumethenight.Hiseyeslookedblack,hisfaceharsh.Heseemedsocold,thecompleteoppositeofhowhehadappearedinmyroomearlier.Whateverhewasthinkingabouthadchangedhim.
“Whydoyoudothis?”Iwhispered.
“What?”
“Tortureyourselfwithwhateveryouarerelivingwhilewatchingthis.Adrian…”
“Youaskedbeforewhatmotivatesmetoconquertheworld,”hesaidandlookedatme.“It’sthis.Twohundredyearsagoonthisnight,Ilosteverything.”
Hegavemenothingelse,butIunderstooditallthesame.WhateverhadhappenedthenightoftheBurninghadledtohisconquestofmyhome.Normally,Iwouldaskformore,butevenIdidnotwishforhimtocontinuetoexperiencethis—whateverthiswas.IonlyknewitwashorrifyingbasedonwhatLothianandZannhadshared.
“Adrian,”Isaidandtuggedonhishand,guidinghimawayfromtheledge.Inside,thestairwellwasjustasdark,andbeforewecoulddescend,hestoppedmeandpinnedmeagainstthewall.Foramoment,Iwasn’tsurewhatheintendedtodo,butthenherestedhisforeheadagainstmine.
“Imissyou,”hewhispered.
AtleastthatwaswhatIthoughtIheard,butthosewordsdidnotmakeanysense.Iwasrighthere.Ididnotaskhimtorepeathimself,andwedidnotspeakaswedescendedstairafterstair.
Asweenteredthegreathall,itwastoaroundofapplause,anddespitethesoundofapproval,Icouldnothelpfeelingthatitwasnotformybenefit.Thecrowdstaredback,fullofnoblesseandtheirvassals,guardsandpalacestaff.TheyweredressedinfarfinerattirethanI’deverseenthem.Thewomenwereinsatin,silk,andvelvet,trimmedinlaceandpearls,ribbonsandrosettes.Themenworehighcollarsandruffles,glovesandgold,andtheyalllookedbackatmewithamixofapproval,longing,andpure,unveiledhatred.Iletallofthemseeme—meteachoneoftheirgazes:fromSorin,Lothian,andZann,toGesalac,Julian,andLadyBella.
“Preening,myqueen?”Adrianasked,andhelookeddownatme,asmiletouchinghislips.
“Areyouchidingme?”Iasked.
“No,byallmeans,continue.”
HepressedhislipstomytempleandthenledmetothehightableandwhereAnaandDarocstood,waitingforustojoinbeforetheywereseated.
WhenIsawAna,Itookherhand.“Howareyou?”Iasked,knowingitwasahorriblequestion,knowingtherewasonlyoneanswer.
“Afraid,”shesaidandgaveashudderingbreath.HereyesflickedtoAdrianandthenbacktome.Iknewwhatshewanted—tobegforIsla’slifeagaininhopesthatshecouldfindacure,andIknewwhatAdrianwouldsay:Shemayyetlive
Ihoped,forAna’ssake,shedid.
Aswesat,Itookintheamountoffoodonthetable—driedmeatsandbread,fruitandcheese.IlookedatAdrianquestioningly,wonderingwhytherewassomuch
“Itisforyouandthevassals,”hesaidandreachedforacarafe.“Wine?”
Hepouredsomeintomygoblet,andItookit,enjoyingthetasteonmytongue—alittlesweet,mostlybitter.Isippedagainandsetthecupaside,watchingthecrowddescendintotheheadymadnessofmusicanddanceandfeeding.Thedoorstothegreathallandthefrontofthecastlewereopen,andIcouldseeintothecourtyardwhereafireblazedandmorepeopledanced.ThiswasamerrycontrasttohowI’dfelthighuponthecastlewithAdrian,andIthoughtitstrangethatthiscouldbebothadayofmourningforsomanyandadayofcelebrationforthesame.
Themusicreachedacrescendosuddenlyanddoveintoahauntingmelody.Alineofwomendressedinblackandveiledcutthroughthecrowd.Isatupstraighter,alittlealarmed.
“Whatishappening?”
“Itisamourningdance,”Anasaid.“Therearethirteenwomen,oneforeachmemberofHighCoven.”
Thecrowdparted,andthewomenbranchedoffinacircle.Handinhand,theypushedandpulledupononeanother,bodiesundulating.Oneofthewomenspunintothecenterofthecircle.Shedancedwildly,beautifully,andwhenshespunoutofthemiddle,anotherwomantookherplace.
Iwatched,transfixed.
Theymovedlikelongshadows,likesmokeintothesky,twisting,twining,twirling,theirmovementsattunedtotheviolenceofthemusic.Ihadneverseenanythinglikeit.IloveditandIalsohatedit—thewayitreachedintomychestwithclawsandpulledallmyemotionstothesurface.Ifeltsomanythingsallatonce:confusionandshameandsadness.Whenitwasover,thesuddencheersstartledme,andIwasslowtorisetomyfeetwiththeothers.
Adrianlookeddownatme,andhereachedoutahand,trailinghisfingersoverthehighpartofmycheek.
“Wouldyoudancewithme?”heasked.
“Yes,”Iwhispered.
Hetookmyhand,holdingitaloftaswemadeourwaytothefloor,drawingmeagainsthimandguidingusinsmoothcircles.Iheldhisgaze,mybodyandbrainfocusedonthefeelofhimmovingwithme.
“Youenjoyedtheperformance?”heasked.
“Yes.”
Imaintainedhisgazeasheguidedmeintoaspin,andwhenIcamebacktohim,heheldmetighterthanbefore.I’dneverimagineddancingwithhimlikethisorfeelingthewayIdidnow—comfortedandsafe.AndasIlookedintohiseyes,IrecalledafewofthewordsRavenahadspoken.
TellmehowconflictedyouarebetweentheloveyouhaveforyourfatherandtheloveyouhaveforAdrian.
Iwouldnotcallthislove,butitwastruemyfeelingshadgrownfarmorecomplicated.Andinsixdays’time,myfatherwouldbearwitnesstoit.
Suddenly,Ifeltsick.
Wefinishedthedanceinsilenceandtogreatapplause,andaswereturnedtoourseats,Itookalongdrinkfrommygoblet.Astheliquidhitmytongue,Iknewthebitternesswaswrong.Ispitthecontentsout,butitwasalreadytoolate—whateverwasinmycuphadtakeneffect.Myheadspun,mythroatfelttight,andmystomachknotted.
“Isolde?”
IheardAdriansaymyname,butIcouldnotfocus,andthenIwasfalling.
“Isolde!”
Hegrippedmyarmandjerkedmetohim.Myheadfellintothecrookofhisarm.Icouldnotholditup,andashisfacecameintoview,theonlythingIcouldfocusonwasthefiercenessofhiseyesashespokemyname.
“Poison,”Imanagedtogaspashisfacebegantomutate.Thewholeworldwasmelting.Iwastoo.
“No,no,no,”Iheardhimsay,andIthoughtthathehadloweredmetotheground,butIcouldnotbecertainbecauseIcouldnotsee.“Isolde?Isolde!”
ThenAdrian’svoiceechoedsuddenly—afirm,franticsound.“Daroc!Lockthedoors!Nooneleavesuntilwediscoverwhopoisonedthequeen.”
Iwasawakelongenoughtofeeltheairswirlaroundme.Itseemedtothickenanddarken,liketendrilsofsmoke,andoutofthedarkness,onceagaincameAdrian’svoice.“Don’tleaveme.”
***
Itwassohot.
Scorching.
Sweatpooledoneverydipofmyskin,ineverycrease.Ithrashed,suffocatedbyit,bytheair,heavywithheat.
Hush,mysweet.
Acoldhandtouchedmyforehead.
Adrian.
Holdontome.Iwillcarryyouthrough.
Iwoke,drenched,myvisionblurry.IturnedmyheadandfoundAdrianwatchingme.
Foramoment,Ithoughthewasangrywithme.I’dneverseenhisfacecarvedquitesoseverely.Mybrowsloweredovermyeyes,andItriedtospeakhisname,butmytonguefeltswollenandsourinmymouth.
“Shh,”hesaid,leaningforward,andsomeofthatharshnessdrainedfromhisface.Heplacedacoolhanduponmyforehead.“Drinkthis.”
Hetiltedmyhead,andIdrankdeeply.
“Nottoomuch,”hesaid.“Youwillmakeyourselfsick.”
Isankintothepillowsagain,mybodyweak.Myeyesfeltlikeleadandclosedoftheirownaccord.
“Sleep,”hewhispered.“Iwillbeherewhenyouwake.”
Hepressedakisstomyforehead.
ThenexttimeIopenedmyeyes,IstaredbackatAna.
“Youareawake,”shesaid,reliefsofteningherfeatures.
“Abouttime,”IheardSorinsay.
“Careful,shemightstabyou,”saidIsac.
“Wearegladtohaveyouback,myqueen,”Mihasaid.
Iblinked,attemptingtoclearmyvisionandgetmybearings.IrealizedI’dbeenbroughttoAdrian’sroom.AnasatnearbywhileSorin,Isac,andMihastoodapartnearthedoorsasifguardingtheentrance.
“WhereisAdrian?”Iasked.
“Hewillreturnshortly,”Anainterjectedquickly.“Letmehelpyousitup.”
Iroseasshestuffedpillowsbehindmyback.Ifeltdizzyandnauseous,andIrecalledhowI’dgottenhere—someonehadpoisonedmywine.
“Here,drinkthis,”Anasaid,andIwasshockedbymyownhesitation.“It’sallright.Look.”
Anasippedfromthecontainer,andwhennothinghappened,Inodded,andsheplacedthecuptomylips.Itwasonlywater,butasithitmytongue,Ifoundmyselfmoreawareofthemetallictasteinmymouthandcringed.
“Wasanyoneelsepoisoned?”
“Onlyyourglass,”saidSorin.
SoIwasthetarget.Iwasnotsurprised.
“Wewillknowmoresoon,nowthatyouareawake,”saidAna.
“HowlonghaveIbeen…”
“Threedays,”Anasaidandthensheadded,hesitantly,“Noone’sleftthebanquethallsinceAdrianbroughtyouhere.Everyonefromguardstothenoblessehavebeenlockedinside.”
Threedays?
“What?”
Justthen,thedooropened,andAdrianappeared,hiseyesimmediatelyfindingmine.Icouldnotplacetheexpressiononhisface.Itwasaharrowingmixofangerandworryandrelief,andashestrodetowardme,Ifoundmyselfsittinguphigher,wishingtoreachforhim.Onlyhebenttomeandpressedhislipstomyforehead.
“Myqueen,”hesaid.“Howdoyoufeel?”
“Likedeath,”Isaid.
Adrianfrownedbutsaidnothing,andIwonderedwhatwordshewouldsayifhechosetospeakatthisverymoment,becausethepainandfearwrittenuponhisfaceshockedme.
“Adrian?”Iwhispered.
“Doyouthinkyouarewellenoughtostand?”heasked.
Ifrowned.“I…thinkso.”
“Wemustreturntothebanquethall,”hesaid.
Myeyeswidened.“Now?Why?”
“Becauseourpeoplemustknowyouarewell,”hesaid.
“Howdoyouknowtheywantmealive?”
“BecauseIwantyoualive,andmypeoplewantwhatIwant,”hesaid.“Andthosewhodonotwillbeeliminated.”
Ididnotdoubthiswords,butIworriedAdrianwouldmakemoreenemiesbydefendingme.Anadrewtheblanketsaway,andIpushedoffthebed,risingtomyshakyfeet.Iwasdressedonlyinashift,butAnahelpedmeintoapatternedrobethatbelongedtoAdrian.Heheldmetightly,anarmaroundmywaist.
“Leanonmeuntilweareinthegreathall.Onceweareinside,Ineedyoutoholdyourheadhighforaslongaspossible.Canyoudothat?”
Inodded.Iknewwhathewasdoing—showingthesepeopleIcouldnotbedefeated,thatIwasstrongerthanthepoisoninmyveins.
Wereturnedtothegreathall.AnawalkedbesidemewhileDarocandSorinled,andIsacandMihawereatourback.Whenthedoorswereopened,IpulledawayfromAdrianandinsteadheldhishand,mygrasptight.Mylegsstilltrembled,andthestenchofurineandfeceswassostrong,Ialmostvomited,butImanagedtowalkthepathwithhim,passingthegauntfacesofthemenandwomenwhohadbeensojovialthreenightsprior.Theywerealmostphantomsofthemselves.Somehadshedtheirluxuriouspetticoatsandjackets,nowwearingthebareminimuminthehotroom.Otherswerecoveredinblood,amarkthatvampiresatleasthadfedwhiletrapped.
Adriantookmetohisthrone,andIsatwithouthishelp,tryingnottosag,thoughIdesperatelywantedtoliedownoncemore.Despitethis,Istayeduprightandwatchedthecrowd,wonderingwhoamongthesepeoplehadseenfittomurderme
Adrianturnedanddrewhissword.
IrealizedIhadonlyseenhimfightahandfuloftimes—onceagainstmyownpeopleandoncewhenhebeheadedZakharov.Iwasn’tsurewhythisfeltdifferent.Perhapsitwasthewayhemoved—withapredatorypurposethatcommunicatedjusthowangryandbetrayedhefelt.
“Oneofyouattemptedtokillmyqueen—yourqueen,”hesaidashetraversedthecrowd.“Youhavecommittedtreasonagainstyourkingandcountry,anduntilIhavethenameoftheoneresponsible,noonewillleavethisroom.”
Agravesilencefollowed,andthensomeonespoke.“Youaremad,Adrian.”ItwasNoblesseAnatoly.“Atleastletyourcouncilgo.Wewouldnotdareharmourqueen.”
Ididnotbelievehim.IknewthehatredtheypossessedforAdrian,andIbelievedthatIhadsomehowmadethatworse.
“YouarenotmycouncilbecauseItrustyou,”Adriansaid.“Youaremycouncilbecauseyouareuseful.Butyouarenotirreplaceable.”
Anatolyscowled.“Isthiswomannotirreplaceable?Issheworthlosingalliances?Sheisonlyawoman,afterall.Therearehundredsatyourbeckandcall—”
Likehisdaughter,LadyBella,Ithought,myfingersgrippingthearmsofAdrian’sthrone.
IexpectedAdriantospeak,togivesomeverbalindicationthatthisnoblessehadoffendedhim,butinstead,Adrian’sbladecutthroughtheair,andAnatoly’sheadslippedfromhisneckandlandedathisfeetasthescreamsofhisdaughterechoedinthehall.
“Whathaveyoudone?”LadyBellashrieked.Herarmswerestretchedtowardherfather,fingerssplayed,butshedidnottouchhim.Shedidnotseemtoknowwhattodo.Overheranguishedscreams,anothermandrewhisbladeandchargedAdrian.ItwasavampireIdidnotknoworrecognize,butIassumedhehadsomeassociationwithLadyBella.
HisstrikeswerehardbutnomatchforAdrian’sstrengthandspeed.TheirbladesclashedonlyafewtimesbeforethevampirejoinedAnatolyonthefloor.
LadyBellacontinuedtoscream.
“Cleanthisup,”Adriansnappedandthenglancedaroundtheroom.“Awarningforyouallbeforethesedoorsopen—youareherebymygrace,bymymercy.Icanunmakeyouall.”
Ashisfinalwordsfellfromhislips,hemetmygaze,andIsawthepromiseinhiseyes.
ItwasthenIrealizedhowwrongI’dbeenaboutAdrian.
Hewasagod.Nineteen
Threedayslater,Ifeltmostlyrecovered.Adrianassignedafoodtaster,amanwhowasbroughtintothekitchensinchainsandmadetosamplemyfoodanddrinkmywineunderDaroc’ssupervision.Itallfeltverysurreal,butsohadmymarriageandthesubsequentattackbymypeople.
Thiswasmylifenow,Irealized.
Thiswasmylifeforever.
Ididnothateit,however.Butasthedayofmyfather’sarrivalandmysubsequentcoronationdrewnear,Ibecamemoreandmoreanxious.Icouldhonestlysay,foronceinmylife,Ididnotknowhowtoact.I’dgrownsocomfortablewithAdrian.Ilikedhimdespitewhathewas.I’dgrowntoappreciatehispast,evenunderstandHighCovenanddespiseKingDragos.
Ihadchanged.
ButIwasn’tsurehowtobethispersonaroundmyfatherorevenifIcould.IfacedthepossibilityofdistancingmyselffromAdrianormyfather,andthatthoughtmademesick.Thiswasn’taworldwhereIcouldhaveboth,eventhoughmyfatherhadsurrenderedtotheBloodKing,eventhoughIwasmarriedtohim.
Istoodattheentranceofthecastleuponthesteps,waitingforaglimpseofmyfather’sbluecapeandhisspottedhorse,Elli.Icouldclimbtothetopofthecastlewallsandseefarther—atleasttotheboundariesoftheStarlessForest—butIdidnotwanttofightthestairsasIracedtohisside.Ishiftedfromfoottofoot,restless,worried,unsureofwhatmyfathermightfaceonhisjourneytotheRedPalace.
“Whattroublesyou?”
IlookedupatAdrian,whostoodbesideme,dressedinhisregal,blackrobes.He’dpulledsomeofhishairback,anditexposedthehighpartsofhisfacetothelight.Hewasbreathtaking—adarknessinthisbrightcourtyard.
“Iamjustworriedformyfather,”Isaid.
“Gavrielwilltakegoodcareofhim,”Adriansaid.
“Iknow,butIwillworryuntilIseehisface.”
IlookedupasSorinflewoverhead,shiftingashelandedinthecourtyardbelow.Itookastepdown,anxiousforinformation.
“Yourfatheriswell,”Sorinsaid.“Heisalmostwithinsight.”
Isteppedbeyondhimthen,totheedgeofthecourtyardwherethetrailsnakeddownthesideofthehillintoCelCeredi.Afewsecondspassedwhenmyheartthrummedthroughmywholebody,andthenIsawmyfatherandIbrokewideopen.Ididnotthinkitwaspossibletofeelsuchhappinessorsuchrelief.
Itookoffatarun,mylegsbarelycarryingme.Iknewwhenhesawmetoo,becausehesetoffatagallop.Hedismountedbeforehegottomeandrantherestoftheway,andasweembraced,Isobbed.
Ihadmissedhimsomuch.Ihadn’tevenrealizedituntilthismoment.
“MysweetIsolde,”hesaid.
Hepushedmeawayandheldmycheeks,hiseyesrovingovermyface.Ifeltasthoughhewaslookingforsomething,perhapsscars,bothphysicalandmental.Herewasthebeginningofmyguilt,butIquashedthatthoughtbypullinghiminforanotherhug.
“Imissedyousomuch,”Isaid.
“Oh,mygem,youdonotknowthedepthofmysorrow.”
Eachwordchippedawayatmyheart,andbythetimewepulledapart,itsatinthebottomofmystomachinpieces.
ItwasthenInoticedCommanderKillian,whostoodapart,waitingpatientlywiththedelegation.
“Commander,”Isaid.
“Myqueen,”hesaidback,bowinghishead.Iexpectedhisgazetobealittlesevere,butinstead,helookedgenial,andIwonderedwhathehadcometothinkofthevampiressincethey’dsooftencometoLara’saidasAdrianhadpromised.
Iglancedbehindme,upattheRedPalace.“Come.Iwillshowyoutothepalace.”
Myfatherdidnotremount.Instead,wewalkedtogetherbacktothecastle,thedelegationfollowingafewpacesbehindus.
“Howwasyourtrip?”Iasked,hopingtokeeptheconversationlightbutalsocurioustoknowifhehadencounteredanythingunusual.
“Thankfullyuneventful,”hesaid.
“HowarethingsinLara?”
Askingaftermyhomebroughtmoreanxiety.IwasnotcertainIwantedtoknowthetruth.BetweentheuprisingandNadia’sletter,Ididnotknowwhattoexpect,andrightnow,allIcouldthinkofweremyfather’swords:Youarethehopeofourkingdom.
Butsomanythingshadchangedsincethen.He’dsaidthatbeforemyownpeoplehadattackedme,beforeI’dlearnedthetruthaboutDragosandHighCoven,beforeI’dlearnedthatmymother’speoplewereenslaved.
AndsuddenlyIwonderedifmyfatherhadknownaboutKingGherogheandNalani.
Surelynot,Ithought.Ihoped.
Iwouldhavetoaskhimlater.
“Uneasy,”hesaid.“Iamnotsosurprised.Iknewmysurrendertothe…”Hetrailedoffandthenclearedhisthroat,correctinghimself.“IknewmysurrendertoKingAdrianwouldcauseunrest.”
Myfatherdidnotlookatmeashespoke,andIfoundhisunderstandingoftherevoltalittleunsettling.Still,Ididnotprod,continuingtokeepourconversationcompanionableuntilwereachedthecourtyard,andmyfathergrewsilent.Ilookedinhisdirection,hiseyessettlinguponAdrian.
Hedescendedthestepsandapproachedus,placidandcomposed.“KingHenri,”hesaid.“WelcometotheRedPalace.”
Myfathertippedhisheadback,observingthemonstrousstructure.“IappreciatetheoffertoseemydaughterandtheescorttoRevekka,KingAdrian,”hesaid.“Itisgoodtoseeyouarewell.”
Iwasnotcertainmyfathermeantthelastpart,buthewasamasterathidingwhathetrulyfelt.Ihadoncebelievedthatmadehimabetterking.NowIwasn’tsosure.
“Ofcourse,”Adriansaidandsteppedaside,gesturingforustomoveintothecastleaheadofhim.
IrequestedrefreshmentsbebroughtupandthenescortedmyfathertohisroomasAdriansawtohismen.
Ihadspentsolongimaginingwhatitwouldbeliketoreunitewithmyfather,Ineveranticipatedthatwewouldhavenothingtotalkabout.ButasIsatoppositehiminhissuite,atatableladenwithfreshfruit,bread,andtea,IfoundIhadnothingtosay.
“IsNadiawell?”Ifinallyasked.
“Yes,yes,”myfatherreplied.“Shemissesyou.”
“Imissher,”Isaid,andourconversationtrailedoffagain.
Tofillthesilence,myfatherslurpedhistea.Ashesethiscupandsaucerdownnoisily,heasked,“Doeshetreatyouwell?TheBloodKing?”
“Yes,”Isaidwithoutpause.“Yes,ofcourse.”
Hestaredatmeforalongmoment,andIdidnotknowifitwasbecausehethoughtIwaslyingorhedidnotlikemyanswer.Finally,hedroppedhisgaze.
“Well,”hesaid,takingabreath.“IthinkIwouldliketorest.”
“DidyouknowaboutNalani?”Iasked.Thewordshadbeenbuildinginthebackofmythroat,andIcouldn’tstopthemfromspillingout.
Heblinked,thenlookeddown.
“Issi—”
“Don’t.”Istoppedhim.“Howcouldyoulookatmeeverydayandnotthinkofthefateofmypeople?DidyounotthinkIwouldwanttodosomething?”
“Isolde,thosearenotyourpeople.YouwereraisedinLara.”
Iflinched.“Butyoumarriedmymother.Didyounotpromisetoprotectherpeopletoo?”
“Ipromisedtoprotecther,andIdid.”
“DidsheknowwhatKingGheroghehaddone?”
Hedidnotanswer.
“Youdidn’tprotectherthen.Youliedtoher.”
Istaredathimandrealizedwhathadweighedonmesincehisarrival—Inolongerknewhim.Andhenolongerknewme.
Youwillcometofindthatbloodhasnobearingonwhoyoubecome,Adrianhadsaidbefore,andhehadbeenright.
Ileftmyfather’sroominadaze,feelingakeensenseofdisappointmentandsadness.Icouldnotquitedecidehowtofeelaboutmyfather’sdecision.ItriedtorationalizethatperhapshefeltasAdrianhad.Perhapsthethreatofvampiresandmonstersandprotectinghispeoplefaroutweighedattemptingtofreemymother’speople.
Still,whywasIraisedknowingnothingoftheirenslavement?Thatfeltlikeabetrayalonitsown.
Iconsideredreturningtomyroomtorestbutdecidedinsteadtoheadintothegarden.Ithadbecomemyplaceofsolace,justastheoneinLarahadbeen,andrightnowIneededitscomfort.AsIwanderedthewornpathsofthegarden,IfoundAdrianlingeringnearapoolofwater.Ihadnotbeensurewherehewouldretirewhilemyfatherwashere,anditwasthefirsttimeI’dencounteredhiminthegarden,thoughIusuallycameearlyinthemorning.
Hestood,framedbytreesandavine-coveredwalllookingbrilliantbeneaththeredsky.
“Whatareyoudoing?”Iasked,comingtostandbesidehim.
“Watchingmyfish.”
Hedidnotlookatme,juststaredintothepool.
“Your…fish?”
Hesaidnothing,andIsupposedhedidnotneedtorepeathimself,becauseasIcametostandbesidehim,Isawthefishtoo.Therewerelargeronesandsmallones;somewereorangeandwhite,andothersweresilverandblack.Theymingledandparted,amesmerizingdance.
“Arethey…yourpets?”
Adrian’slipsquirked.“Isupposeyoucancallthemthat.Theymakemefeelcalm.”
Iwonderedwhatspurredhisdiscontent.WasitthatmyfatherhadarrivedfromLara?OrthatIslawasstillmissingandRavenawasontherun?
“Andyou?”heasked.“Whydoyoucometothegarden?”
Mythoughtswerefarmorepersonalthanmyanswer.IcametothegardensbecausewhileIdidnotknowmymother,theflowersfeltlikeherembrace.AndthatwaswhatIcravedrightnow.
“Thesameasyou.”
Wewerebothquietforamoment,andthenAdriansaidmyname,anditwasn’tuntilIlookedathimthatIbroke.
Icried.Hepulledmeintohisarmsandkissedme,andImethismouthwithmine,andsoonmybackwasagainstthevine-coveredwall,mylegswrappedaroundAdrian’swaist.Wewerealmostfranticwithhowquicklywecametogether.Hisfingersbitintomythighs,whileminetwinedintohishair.Mybreathswerecries,keeninganddesperateasAdrianmovedinsidemeatthisoddangle.
“Sparrow,”hebreathedandburiedhisheadinthecrookofmyneck.Ashedid,Isawthatwewerenotaloneinthegarden,andIchokedonamoanasKillian’snamespilledfrommymouth.
IfeltAdrianstiffenagainstme,andheslowlyloweredmetotheground.
Icouldn’tevenlookatKillian,myfacefeltsohot.AllIhadworriedaboutwashowtointeractwithAdrianwhenmyfatherandKillianwerenear,andhereI’dbeencaughthavingsexwithhim.Knowingthecommander,hewouldtellmyfathertoo.Thenwhat?Myrelationshipwithmyfatheralreadyfeltstrained.
“CommanderKillian,”Adriansaid,apitchoffrustrationinhisvoice.“Canwedosomethingforyou?”
“Youdishonorher,”hesaid.
Adrianofferedashrewdsmile.
“Inwhatway?Byfuckingheragainstawall?Itfeelslikeworshiptome.”
Killiangrittedhisteeth,andIlookedbetweenthem,embarrassedbothbyAdrian’swordsandthatwehadbeencaught,byKilliannoless.Ihurriedfromthegarden,headingforthesecretcorridorsthatwouldallowmetopass,unnoticed,tomyownroom,butjustinsidethedoor,Adriancaughtuptome.
“Isolde!”Hereachedformyarm,andItwistedtowardhim.
“Didyoudothatonpurpose?”Idemanded.
Adrianflinched,almostlikeIhadslappedhim,andthenhenarrowedhiseyes.“Whydoyoucarethathesawus?”
Iglaredandhewaited.Finally,Irelented,admitting,“Idon’tknowhowtodothis.Bewithyouandlovethem.”
“Noonesaysyoucannotdoboth,”Adriansaid.
“Thatisnottheworldwelivein,Adrian.”
“YouarequeenofRevekka,soontobequeenofCordova.Yougettodecidewhatworldyoulivein.”
Ireturnedhisgaze,mychesttightening.Ifthatwasthecase,whydidIfeelsopowerless?Iwatchedhimtakeabreathandthenstepaway.
“Iamherewhenyouareready.”
Adrianleftmeinthecorridor,alone.
***
Aseveningapproached,IaskedVioletaandVesnatohelpmegetdressedearlyinagownthatVioletahadmadefromfabricsgatheredatthemarketinCelCeredi.Itwassleeveless,thebodiceablackappliquéthatcuppedmybreastsandtraileddownmystomachintoafullskirtmadeoflightpinksilkoverlaidwithblacktulle.
Adrianwouldlikeit,Ithought,andthistimeasthefamiliarclawsofguiltattemptedtogripmychest,Ishovedthemaway.
Today,IwouldstopfeelingguiltyaboutmyfeelingsforAdrian.
Theywerecomplicatedtobesure,butnomorecomplicatedthanhowIfeltaboutthepeopleofLarawhohadtriedtokillmeormyfather,whohadkepttheenslavementofmymother’speoplefromme.
“Isawyouwithyourfathertoday,”Violetasaid.“Youlookedsohappy.”
Ihadbeenhappy;nowIwasconfusedandalittleangry.Iwonderedhowshefelt,havingmyfatherinhercountry,anenemywhoagreedwithDragos’sagenda,thekingwhohadkilledherfamily.
“Iwashappytoseehim.HewasallIhadforsolong,sincemymotherdiedwhenIwasborn.”
Hehadbeenmyworld,andtherehadbeennothingbeyondthat.
Now,thatwasnotso.Now,IhadAdrian,andsoonI’dhaveawholenation.
“ThenIamgladheisheretowatchyoubecomequeenofRevekka,”shesaid,anddespitemyconflictedfeelingsaroundmyhomeandmyfather,IwasthankfulforVioleta’swords.
Thelastpieceofmyoutfitwasablackcirclet.ItwasheavierthanIexpectedandhadblackobsidiangemstwistedaroundit.AsIplacedituponmyhead,Iwonderedjusthowhappymyfatherwouldbeseeingmeasqueen.
“Ifthereisnothingelse,myqueen?”
“No,nothingelse,”Isaid.“Thankyou,Violeta,Vesna.”
Thewomenleft,andIturnedfromthemirrorandcrossedtheroomtostoremybladesinsidethedrawer,sincetheycouldnotbehiddenonmypersoninthisdress.ButasIwenttoputthemaway,myeyesfelltothebookI’dtakenfromthelibrary—theoneinwhichthestrangebladewashidden.Ihadyettoopenitagain,topickuptheknife,forfearofrelivingtheencounterwithDragosoncemore,butsomethingdrewmetothebook,andasIopenedit,Irealizeditwasn’tabookatallbutajournal.Thewordsweresoprecise,itlookedlikeprint.
Iwouldbecontent,ifIwerefreetoconjurespellsandteach,butVadasaysmygiftistoopowerfultowaste.Sheputstoomuchfaithinthesewould-bekings,menwhosaytheyshouldruleakingdombecausetheirbloodisdifferent,thoughtheybleedredliketherestofus.Shethinkstheywilluseourmagictopredictdroughtandfamine,butmyking—hehastheheartofaconqueror.
Anotherentryread:
TodaythekingaskediftheHighCovenwouldsupportaninvasionofZenovia.Iaskedhimhowthatwouldhelphispeople,andwhenIdid,hesaidIwashereformyprophecy,notmyopinion.
Hedoesnotunderstandthattheyareoneandthesame.
TheHighCovendidnotagreetosupportthekinginhiswishtoinvade,andthoughIbelievetherightdecisionwasmade,Iamfilledwithsuchdreadformypresentandfuture.KingDragoswillmurderme.Ihaveforeseenit.
Isharedthiswoman’sdread,anditkeptmeturningpages.
Mydaysinthislifearewaning.IdonothavethehearttotellAdrian.
Ourlovewilldamnthisworld.
Ifeltnumbwithshock.Suddenly,IcouldconnecteveryinstancewhenAdrianhadspokenaboutthewitches,defendedtheirmagic,talkedoftheirwishforpeace.Hehaddonesowithsuchreverence,andIhadneverconsideredthatithadbeenbecausehelovedoneofthem.
HehadlovedYesenia.
ItwasnotthatIdidn’tbelievewhatAdriansaidaboutHighCoven.ThisdidnotchangewhatIhadlearned—whatVioletahadsaidortheaccountsI’dreadinthelibraryfromDragos’sreign—butithurttoknowthatIheldthejournalofAdrian’slover.Thatshehadwritteninthesepages,thatshehadprofessedherloveforhimhere,andthateverythinghewasdoingnow—conqueringmyworld—wasstillforher.
Shewashisworld.
Andifshewashisworld,whatwasI?
Onceagain,IfoundmyselfaskingaquestionIhadn’tinalongtime—whyme?
Iletthebookfallfrommyhands,myshockleechingthecolorfrommyfaceasIstruggledtoreconcilethisnewinformationwithhowAdrianlookedatme,withthewordshehadspokentome.Ihadtoreasonthathecouldalsocareformeandloveher,butwhydidthatsuddenlynotfeellikeenough?
IthoughtIknewmyself,butIdidn’t.I’doncebeenIsolde,princessofLara,awomanwhocouldnotbeswayedbyprettywordsoraprettyface.Awomanwhowouldnotmarryandwouldrulejustaswell.ThenI’dbeenbetrayedbymypeople,andI’dcometorulealandofmonsters—asparrowamongwolvesindeed.
ThisIsolde,thequeenofRevekka,hadbeenblinded.
Aknockatthedoorgroundedme,andIbenttopickupthebook.
“Areyouready,Isolde?”Anaaskedassheopenedthedoor,andthenshepaused.“What’swrong?”
Icouldnotrecoverenoughtolie.
“IknowaboutYesenia,”Isaid,becauseIwascertainsheknewtoo.ShewasAdrian’scousin,andshehadexistedjustaslongashehad.
“Isolde—”
“Whydidn’tyoutellme?”
Shejuststared,andIshovedthebookbackintothedrawer,alongwithmyknives,shuttingitsoviolently,itshookonitslegs.
“It’snotwhatyouthink,Isolde.”
“Thenwhatisit?”Isnapped,lookingather.Shewaspale,andtherewasamomentwhenIfeltterribleforbringingthisuponherwhenIslawasattheforefrontofhermind.
“Adriancaresforyou.”
Itwasmyturntoflinch.“IthinkhelovesYesenia.”
“Youcannotbeangrywithhimforavengingherdeath,”Anasaid.“Hewatchedherburnatthestake,andwhenhetriedtofight,theywhippedhim.Healmostdied.”
Athicknessgatheredinmythroat.I’dtouchedthosescars,tracedthemwithmyowncallousedfingers.Theywereraisedandjagged,andtheycoveredeveryinchofhisskin.
“Thatnight,henotonlylosttheloveofhislife,buthealsolosthisking.AdrianhadbeenloyaltoDragos,amemberofhisEliteGuard.”
“Heshouldhavebeenmorediscerningthen,”Isaid.
Analookeddevastatedbymycomment,andherdistresshitmeintheheart.
“Youdon’tknowwhatitwaslike,”shesaid,hervoicequivering.“Wewereall…Noneofussawitcoming.”
Yeseniahad,whichmeantshehadkepttheknowledgefromeveryone,includingAdrian.
Iswallowedthepainandtheangerthathadgatheredinmythroat.“Ana—”
Sheshookherhead,silencingme.“Wewillbelate.”
Shedidnotwaitforme,andIdidnotblameher.Ihadbeeninsensitive.Shewasright.IdidnotknowwhatitwasliketoliveduringtheBurningortheDarkEra,andIwasnotpersonallyconnectedtoanyonewhohadlosttheirlives.Itwasnotformetojudgehowsomeoneshouldbehaveorwhatsecretstheysharedaroundsomethingsotraumatic.
Still,Iwashurt.Icouldadmitthattomyself.AndwhenIwashurt,Iwantedtofight.
Thegreathallwasonceagainpacked,walltowall.Mortalsandvampiresalikecrowdedaroundtablesorhuddledclosetogether,makingroomforthosewhowishedtodance.WhenIentered,someonebeganachant.
“Longlivethequeen!”
Itcontinued,andpeoplebowed,thoughIcouldnothelpfeelinglikeIwassurroundedbyenemies:peoplewhofeltAdrianwasdistractedbyme,peoplewhohadexpectationsofmethatIcouldnotmeet.Iwasathreattoeveryone’sagenda.
Isupposedthatwasmypowernow,andIjusthadtostayalivelongenoughtouseit.
Itwasalreadyhotintheroom.Perspirationwasgatheredbetweenmythighsandbreasts.Itwouldbeanuncomfortableeveninginmorethanoneway,IrealizedasIcrestedthedaiswhereAdrianwaited.Hispresencewasaphysicalblow.Hewasdressedinablacktunicoverwhichheworeafine,blackvelvetsurcoat.Hewaslikethenight,andhisfacewaslitlikeastar,framedinahaloofblondhair.
Iheldhisgaze,andheseemedbothsincereandtender.Iwastornbetweenlettinggoofmyrageandstabbinghimashegreetedme.
“Myqueen,”hesaidandheldouthishand.Itookit,notwishingforhimtoknowthatI’ddiscoveredhissecret.Notyet.IonlythoughtwithreliefthatIhadavoidedmakingafoolofmyself.MomentsbeforeI’dfoundYesenia’sjournal,Iwouldhavegonetohim.IwouldhavetoldhimIwasreadytomaketheworldIwanted.
Icouldstillhaveit,Iremindedmyself.Adrianwasonlyavesselthroughwhichtoachievemygoal.
Ishovedmyhurtdownandliftedmyhead.Iwouldenjoythisnight,andIwouldbecrownedqueentomorrow,andIwouldseekawaytohavemyownformofvengeance.Andperhaps,intheend,IwouldruleasIwasmeantto—alone.
“Myking,”Iacknowledgedcurtly.
Adrianraisedabrow.“Areyoufeelingwellthisevening?”
“Extremely,”Ireplied,tryingtocalmmyselfenoughsothathecouldn’treadmymind.Itwashardtoimbuemyvoicewithanythingbutdisdain.Imovedpasthim,headedforthehightablewheremyfatherstood.Normally,Iwouldhaveembracedhim,kissedhischeek,buttonight,Ionlygreetedhim.
“Father,”Isaid.
“Isolde.”Hisvoicewasmuchsofter,asifhewishedtosaysomething,butIdidnotlookathim,andIdidnotevengreetKillian,whostoodoppositehim.
Adriancametostandbesideme,DarocandAnaonhisright.Ashesat,therestofusfollowed.Ireachedformywine,andthoughIknewithadbeentestedinthekitchensbeforeithadarrivedhereatmytable,Istillhesitated.
“Wouldyoulikemetotryit?”Adrianasked.
Iswallowed,andwithoutmeevenanswering,hesipped.
Icouldnothelpwatchinghowthewinestainedhislipsuntilhelickeditaway,andashesetthegobletdownbeforemyhand,hesaid,“Fine.”
“Thankyou,”Isaidlightlyandswallowedamouthful.
ItwasnotlongafterthatIbegantofanmyself.Theheatburnedmyskin.
“Warm,mysweet?”Adrianaskedbesideme.
EvenasIturnedtowardhim,Ifeltthesweatgatheringuponmybrow.Heappearedunbothered.
“Boiling,”Isaid.
“Perhapsmovementwouldhelp,”Adriansuggested.“Wecoulddance.”
“No,”Ibreathed.“I’drathernot.”
Itwasn’tuntilthewordswereoutofmymouththatIrealizedhowhewouldtakemyrefusal.HewouldthinkI’ddeclinedbecausemyfatherandKillianwerepresent,whentherealitywasthatIcouldnotfacehimrightnow.Icouldnotbethatclosetohimatthisverymoment.Iwanteddistance,butIhadtoremainatthebanquet.
Wedrankandateandwatchedtheboisterouscrowd,whodidnotchangetheirbehavioreveninthepresenceofmyfather.Vampiresfedfromtheirvassalsandperformedvarioussexualacts,smallfightsbrokeout,andwhenbloodwasdrawn—byvampireormortal—therewasanevengreaterstruggletotasteit.
“Despicable,”myfathermutteredunderhisbreath.
“Perhapsyoushouldretire,KingHenri,ifthisistoomuchforyou,”Adriansaid.
Ididnotlikesittingbetweenthem.
“Isthishowyouclaimtotakecareofmydaughter?”heasked.“Exposinghertothis…filth?”
IworriedoverwhatAdrianwouldsay.Yourdaughterisnosaint.
“Shehasachoice,justasyou.”
“Youmakeamockeryofthelegacyofthiscastle.”
“Andwhatisthatlegacy,KingHenri?Oneofmassmurderandthepersecutionofinnocents?”
Ipushedmychairawayfromthetableandrose,unabletohandlebeingatthecenteroftheirconversationandunwillingtomediate.
“Excuseme,”Isaidandleftthegreathall.
Itwascoolerinthecorridor,andIstoodneartheopendoors,staringatthefirethatroaredatthecenterofthecourtyard.ItwasonethathadnotbeenextinguishedsincetheBurningRites.Womendancedaroundit,flowercrownsupontheirhead.Iwatchedthemforamoment,mesmerizedbytheirmovementsandtheshadowstheycast.IwonderediftheyfearedtheflameslikeIdid.
“Isolde.”
Ihadnotheardanyoneapproach,andIwhirled,myheartinmythroat,onlytofaceKillian.
“Apologies,QueenIsolde,”hecorrectedhimself,thoughitsoundedalittlesarcastic.“Areyouallright?”heasked.
Iwassuspiciousofhisquestionbutansweredanyway.“I’mfine,”Isaid.“Didyouneedsomething?”
Hehesitated,eyesdartingtotheleftbeforehespoke.“Iwouldliketofirstapologizeforhowweparted.”
“Butnotforwhatyousaid?”Iasked.
Helookedatme,andIfeltasthoughhewasasking:Willnothingeverbegoodenough?
“Whatareyoudoing,Isolde?”
Mybrowslowered,confusedbyhisquestion.“Idon’tknowwhatyoumean.”
“Thatmonsterisinlovewithyou.”
“What?”Mybreathrushedoutofmeathisobservation.ThenotionoflovebetweenAdrianandmewasridiculous,especiallygivenwhatIhadjustlearnedaboutYesenia.Iwassurprisedbyhowhissuggestionhurt.
“Isolde…”
“Commander—”
“HaveyoueventriedtokillhimsinceleavingLara?”
“Whatexactlydoyouwantfromme?”Iaskedhim.“Imarriedhimtoprotectourpeople—peoplewholatertriedtokillme.Istabbedhimtwice.I—”
I’dsleptwithhim.I’dfoundcomfortinhim.I’dhurtforhim.
“Youlovehim,”Killiansaid,andhestaredatmethewayhestaredatAdrian.
Ishookmyhead.“Youwouldn’tknowloveifitlookedyouintheface,Killian.”
“IthoughtIdid,”hesaid.
“Andyouwerewrong.”
Imovedpassedhimandenteredthegreathallagain.MygazeshiftedoverthecrowdandlandedonceagainonAdrian,whosatreclined,onehandliftedtohismouthashewatchedme.Istaredathim,atthemanwhohadlovedYesenia,themanwhohadkilledakingforher,conqueredakingdomforher.
Shehadneverreallydied,andIhadneverreallybeenhisqueen,hismatch,orhisequal.
Suddenly,thesoundofdrumspulsed,nearlyvibratingtheground.Iturned,lookingaroundme,onlytofindaprocessionofwomendressedinshimmery,beadedscarvesthatweresotranslucent,Icouldseetheirbreastsandthecurlsattheapexesoftheirthighs,theirhairthreadedthroughwithflowers.Theyspunandtwirledatfirstthroughthewholecrowd,butthentheycircledme,andthewomanatthestartofthelineplacedafloralcrownuponmyheadwhileanothertookmyhands,sweepingmeintotheirparade.Atfirst,IresistedasIwaspushedandtouched,butsoonIgaveintothemovements,followingthebeatofthedrumsandthethudofthedancers’feet.Iletthemspinmeandtwirlme.Itwasnotviolentorangry;itwasgentleandjovial.
BeforeIknewit,wewereoutside,dancingbeforethelargefireatthecenterofthecourtyard,andtheheatfromitmademesweat.Iletmyhandsriseintotheair,andIspunbeneaththestarryskywhilepeoplearoundmelaughedanddancedandkissedandfucked.AndIreveledinthefrenzy,desperatetoforgeteverythingaboutAdrianandmyfatherandmyfuture,untilthefirstscreambrokeout
Ihaltedinmyrhythm.Myeuphoriawassuddenlydrownedinfearasthecourtyardfilledwithalineofknightsfromanothertime.Betweeneachpairwasawoman.Thefirsthaddarkhair,andsomehow,Iknewthathercheekswereusuallyrosyandthathereyeswerebrightblue,butrightnowshewaspale,andtherewasnolightinhereyes.
Herhandsweretiedbehindherback,andthesoldiersgrippedherupperarms,theindentationsoftheirfingersmakingherskinturnwhite.Theyonlyreleasedherwhentheypushedherintothefire.
“Evanora!”Iscreamed,andIstruggledbutfoundItoowasbound.
Shehitthewoodenpyre,andherhorrifyingscreamsfilledtheair.Shethrashedandthewoodcollapsed,sparksexplodingassherolled,aballofflamethatpartedthecrowduntilshecametoastop,dead.
Thedisplaydidnotstopthesequence.
ThenextwomanwasOdessa.Shetriedtofight,butshewassubduedwithacracktotheskullandtossedintotheflame.Shedidnotmovebutwiltedthereonthepyre.
Ididnotstopscreaming,evenasmyvoicebrokeandmythroatbled.Iscreamedasmycoven,mysisters,thesewomenwhosesoulsspoketomine,diedbeforemyeyes.Ididnotknowhowlongitlasted,butthefirebegantoloseitspotency,andoverthedyingflames,Isawasetofdarkeyes—KingDragos.BesidehimwasthewomanwhosemagichadhauntedmesinceLara,Ravena,herunmistakablegingerhairevenmoreradiantinthefirelight.
Whenthekingmetmygaze,hesmiled.
“Bringhim,”thekingordered,andmyeyesshiftedtoafamiliarfaceframedwithwhite-goldhair.
“Adrian.”Hisnameraspedfrommymouth,andmyheartbeatharderinmychest.“Adrian!”
Hewasbroughttohiskneesbeforeme,andIsawthathisheadwasbleeding,hislipswerecracked,andbruisesbloomedacrosshischeek.
“Yesenia!”Helookedupfromtheground,desperate.
“Adrian,”Irepeatedhisname,andforthefirsttimetonight,Ifeltasenseofcalmwashovermethatcamefromasimplepieceofknowledge—hewouldlive.
Hewouldlive,andhewoulddamntheworld.
Dragos’svoiceechoedinthecourtyard.
“Tothinkmygreatestknightwouldchooseawitchoverhiskingdom.Well,tonight,youwillwatchherburn.Tomorrow,youwillcollectherashes.Lightit.”
“Yesenia!”Adrianstruggledagainsttheguards,buttheybeathimuntilhecouldbarelyrisetohisknees.
Asthesoldiersmovedforwardtoplacetorchesatmyfeetandthesmokerosetofillmyvisionandmythroat,Ispoke.“Donotfight,mylove,”Isaid.“Youaredestinedforthisworld.”
“Yesenia,”Adrianwhispered,thenbegged.“Please.Please.Please.”
Ishookmyheadandspokewordsthatrippedmyheartintwo.“Allthestarsintheskyarenotasbrightasmyloveforyou.”
Andastheflameslappedatmyskin,Isqueezedmyeyesshutandclenchedmyjawtight.IwouldnotgiveDragosthesatisfactionofmyscreams.
Attheend,Ifeltnopain.Twenty
IwokeupwithastarttofindthatIwasinAdrian’sroom.Iwasdressedonlyinmyshift,thesmellofsmokeclungtomyhair,andmythroatwassore.Itouchedmyneck,wincingasIswallowed.AsIroseintoasittingposition,IfoundAdrianstandingafewfeetaway,staringouthisdarkwindows.
HedidnotseemtoknowthatIhadawakened,andIwastoocaughtupinmyemotionstoattempttoburythemnow.I’dbeeninsideYesenia’shead.I’dwatchedthepeoplesheloveddie.I’dwatchedAdrianbegforherlifeatmyfeet.I’dheardhimscreamforher.I’dseenhishorrorandhispain.
“IknowaboutYesenia,”Isaid.
Adrianturnedtowardme.Hewasstilldressedasifhehadcomefromthecelebrationinthegreathall,buthehaddiscardedhisovercoat.
“Everythingyoudo,youdoforher.”
Hesaidnothing.
“WhatIdon’tunderstandis,whyme?Whymakemeyourqueen?”
“Isolde—”Adriansaidmynamelikehewasdesperateformetounderstand,buttherewasnoexplainingthis.
Ipushedtheblanketsoffandstoodfromhisbed.“YoutookmefrommyhometofillaplacebesideyouthatIcouldneverfillinyourheart.”
“Isolde—”
Againhesaidmynamebutfirmer.
Ipushedon.“Ididnotwanttolove,becauseithasonlyevermeantloss,butIletmyselfdoitanyway!”Iscreamed,andithurtsobad,Iflinched.Everythinghurt
“Areyoufinished?”Adrianasked,atingeofannoyanceinhistone.
“Ihateyou,”Isaidthroughmyteeth.Itdidn’tmatterthatIhadjustadmittedtolovinghim.
Hetookasteptowardmeandthenanother.“Youhatemebecauseyouloveme,”hesaid,anditfeltlikeatauntasthecornersofhislipslifted.
TheonlythingIknewtodowasfight.SoIlaunchedmyselfathim,buthislegstangledwithmine,andIendeduponthefloorwithAdrianontopofme.
“Don’tyoudarelaugh!”Istruggledagainsthim.
“Iwouldneverlaughatyou,”hesaid.
“Youare!Youdid!”Thistime,Icouldnotkeepthehurtfrommyvoice.Everythingjustkeptgettingworse.“IwishIhadnevermetyou.”
“Isolde,”Adriansaid,andtherewassomethinginhisvoicethatmademegocompletelystill.Hecalledmyname,anditcalledtomysoul.Hiseyesheldmineashebrushedstraypiecesofmyhairfrommyface.“Youhaveaplacebesidemebecauseyoufillmyheart.Iloveyou.Ihavelovedyousincethebeginning,”hesaid,andhisvoicealmostbroke.“Ihavelovedyouforever.”
HiswordshurtinawayI’dneverimagined.Thiswasagoodkindofpain,anagonyI’ddiefor.“Ifyouhavelovedmeforsolong,whydidn’tyoutotellme?”
“Youwouldhavelaughedatme,”hesaid.“Butitisalsothenatureofmycurse.”
“Ithoughtyouweren’tcursed.”
“Iamnotcursedtobeavampire,”Adriansaid.“ButIamcursedinotherways,andyouareone.”
Ishookmyhead.“AndYesenia?”
“Isolde,itisn’twhatyouthink.Idon’tknowhowtotellyou—”
Ipressedmyfingerstohislipsandstaredathim.Iwantedtoknow,butnotrightnow.Notafterwhathe’dsaid,whatI’dsaid.Ineededmorethanwords.
“Makelovetomefirst.”
Adriancapturedmyfacebetweenhishands,eyessearchingminebeforeourmouthssealedtogether.Ashedid,hisfingersthreadedintomyhair.Hisbodymovedagainstmine.Ourhandssearchedfortiesandclasps,eagertofeelskinagainstskin,andwhenwewerebare,Adriankneltbetweenmythighs.Onehanddippedbehindmyknee,guidingitoverhisshoulder,andhepartedmyfleshwithhisfingerswhilehismouthclosedovermyclit.Iletoutabreaththatsoundedmorelikeasighandtwistedmyfingersintohislong,silkenhair.
Ashethrustandteased,ahardersoundescapedmymouth,myfingersdiggingintohisscalp.Helookedupatmefromhisplacebetweenmylegs,hiseyesglinting,fullofafuriousdesiretopleasureandplease.Andhedid,sendingcoilsofelectricitythroughoutmybodyuntilmystomachwaswoundsotight,Ibeganchantinghisnameandmovingwithhim.
“Please,”Ibreathed.“Adrian.”
Heroseupmybodyandkissedme,slowandlanguid.
“Holdon,”hesaid,andIwrappedmyarmsandlegstightaroundhisbodyashecarriedmetothebed.Theblanketscradledme,andAdriancoveredme.Hisbodyfeltsowarmandsolidandright.Hislipsleftminetotrailalongmyjawandcollarbonebeforeheliftedhimselftomeetmygaze.
“Idonotpray,”hesaid.“ButIbeggedforyou.”
Thenhebentandkissedtheplacebetweenmybreastsbeforerisingfullyandpressinginsideuntilhehadfilledme,wholeanddeep,andpaused.Wetookabreathandstaredateachother,andafteramoment,Adrianbegantomove—slow,lushthruststhatensuredIfelteverypartofhim.
Perspirationbuiltonourskin,andIheldhisforearms,nailsdiggingintohishardmuscleassoundsandwordsescapedmymouth—aneroticsongheencouragedmetosing.ItwasinthismomentthatIunderstoodItrulylovedhim.HehadmademecomealiveinawaynooneelsehadfromthemomentIlaideyesonhiminLara,andI’dspenteverydaysincefightingit—butnomore.Suddenly,Iwonderedwhatitwouldbeliketosurrendertohim,tooffermywholebeing.
Wouldheofferthesametome?
“Adrian,wait,”Isaid,andhefrozeaboveme,concernetchedacrosshisglisteningface.
“Areyouallright?”heasked,breathless.
Ismiledandtrailedmyfingersalonghischeekbone.“Takefromme.”
Ididnotthinkitwaspossibleforhimtobecomeanymorestill.
“Areyoucertain,Isolde?”
Inodded,andmyeyesblurredwithtears.“Iamcertain,”Isaid,feelingthetruthofitinmychest.“Iwanteverypartofyou.Iwanttoinvadeyourbody.Iwanttobesoheavyinyourblood,youtastemewhenyoubleed.”
Adrianshookhisheadalittle,andthenheslidfrommybodyandsatup.
“Whereareyougoing?”Idemanded,risingwithhim.
“Thereissomethingyoumustunderstandaboutyourbloodletting,”hesaid.“Beforeyouagree.”
Iwaited,staringupathim.
“ItoldyouthatIbeggedforyou?”hesaid.
Inodded.
“Andyouareherenowbecauseofthosepleas.”
Mybrowsfurrowed,butInoddedanyway.HewasactingasifIwasagiftfromthegoddesses.
“PartakingofyourbloodmeansI…becomevulnerable.Worse,itwillmakeyouatarget.”
“Iamalreadyatarget,”Isaid.IhadbeensinceI’dagreedtomarryhim.“Butwhatdoyoumean…vulnerable?”
“Bydoingthis,youbecomemyonetrueweakness.Ifyoudie,Idie.”
“No,”Isaidimmediately.Ineededhimtobeinvincible.Ineededhimtobeimmortal.IsworeIwouldneverloveifIhadtolose.“Thenwecan’t.Iwon’t.”
“Isolde,”hesaid,andthatgentlenessreturnedtohisexpression.“Iwouldneverletanythinghappentoyou,butIwillalsonotexistwithoutyouagain.Morethanthat,though,IamwillingtoriskmylifetobebondedtoyouthewayIhavealwaysdesired.Ihavewaitedcenturiesforthis.Foryou.”
Myheartfeltlikeitwouldexplode.
“Doesanyoneknow?Aboutthecurse?”
“Onlythosewhoweretherewhenitwasmade,”hesaid.“Ana,Daroc,Sorin,andTanaka.”
Theywereclosesttohim,moretrustedthananyoneelseinAdrian’scircle.Ifeltsafeintheknowledgethatnooneknewbeyondthosefour,andintheend,noonehadtoknowofourbloodletting.Therewouldbenoevidence,nowoundandnoscarring,becauseAdriancouldhealit.
Irosetomykneesandtwinedmyarmsaroundhisneck.
“Wellthen,you’lljusthavetodoaverygoodjobofprotectingme.”
Ikissedhim,andAdriangatheredmeintohisarms,guidingmylegsoneithersideofhisashesatontheedgeofthebed.Heheldmywaistandslidintome,hismouthleavingminetograzealongmyneckandshoulder.Iclungtohimandshuddered,lettinghimlead,andwhenhisfangselongatedandpiercedmyskin,Igaveagutturalcry.Therewasasecondofpainbeforethepleasureofhismouthandhiscockwonover.Theyseemedtoworkintandem,fillingmewithanecstasythattookmeunder.
AndthenmymindwasfloodedwithmemoriesofAdrian.
Memoriesthathadfeltlikedreams.
Imethimbeneathjasmineandkissedhimunderstars,andwemadeloveinthedark,andthatloveendedinfireanddamnedtheworld.
IknewthenwhoItrulywas.
WhoIhadalwaysbeen.
YeseniaofAroth.
IwasYeseniaofAroth—notnow,notinthisbody,butIhadbeenherinanotherlife,inAdrian’slife.
ThetearscamewhenAdrianreleasedme.
“Isolde.”Hecuppedmyfaceandkissedmymouthandmycheeks.“Tellme.”
“Iknow,”Iwhispered,andmybodyshookwithsobs.
Icouldn’texplainitcompletely.Ididnothaveallthememoriesormoments,buttheknowledgeofwhoIhadbeenandwhoIwasnowexistedsimultaneouslyinmymind.AndAdrian—hehadbroughtmeback.Whenmymindhadnotrememberedhim,mybodyhad.
“Iknowyou,”Isaidandcollapsedagainsthim.
***
IlaydrapedoverAdrian’sbody,hisfingersmovinglightlyovermyskinasIwrestledwithmystrangethoughts,dividingthemintopastandpresent.
“Buthowdidyougethere?Howdidyoubecomea…”
“Monster?”
Ismiledalittle.“Avampire.”
“Imadeatrade,”hesaid.“IbeggedthegoddessDistoletmeliveandseekrevengeagainsteveryoneresponsibleforyourdeath,andshegrantedmywish.”
IhadafewmemoriesofHighCovenworshippingDisastheircreator.
“Attheexpenseofdesiringblood?”
“ItiswhatIaskedfor—letmetastethebloodofmyenemies.”Iheardhimchucklequietly.“Becarefulofyourwordsindealswiththedivine.”
“Youneverspeakofthegoddesses,”Iobserved.
“JustbecauseIwascreatedbyonedoesnotmeanIservethem.Godsbecomemorehumanthecloseryouaretothem,”Adriansaid.
Isensedtherewasmorehecouldsay,buthedidn’t,soIasked,“Doyouhateher?Forwhatshemadeyou?”
“No.IquitelikewhatIam,”hesaid.
Wewerequietforafewmoments,andthenhespoke.“Ispentalongtimesearchingforyou.WhenIsawyouinthewoods,ittookeverythinginmypowernottobiteyouthen.”
“Whydidn’tyou?”
Itseemedliketheeasiestthing.Hewouldhaveavoidedallmyhate,allmyangerandresentment.
“Iwouldhave,butDisisacruelgoddesstobargainwith.Youhadtochooseme,loveme.”Hepaused.“Idonotthinkshebelievedyoueverwould.”
Therewassomethingominousabouthowhespoke.Ihaltedmyexplorationofhisskinandmethisgaze.
“IsshewhyyoubeganyourconquestoftheNineHouses?”Iasked.“DoyouconquerforDis?”
“Iconquerformyself,”hesaid.“AndDiscandonothingwithoutme,becauseIamherweapon.”
“Butyoudonotwishtobeherweapon,”Isaid.
Adriandidnotspeak.
Irose,straddlinghim,hishandsgraspingmythighs.“Ifthesedivinebeingsaresopowerful,whydotheynotcometoearthandvanquishtheirenemies?Whydotheyplaywithmortalsandmonsters?”
“Theyhavenopoweronearth,savewhattheycandothroughus,”Adriansaid,hishandsdriftingtomywaist.
“Canagoddessbekilled?”Iwhispered.
“Thatisblasphemy,”hesaid,thoughhiseyesflashedattheprospect.
“Areyoupretendingtobepious?”Iteased,justasheoncehad.
Ibentandkissedhim,thentookhiminsidemeagain.
***
ItwaslateinthemorningwhenIreturnedtomychambertowaitforVioletaandVesna’sarrival.Ineededtobatheanddress,andIwouldliketospendsometimewithmyfatherbeforethecoronationbegan.Iwasstillnotpleasedwithhim,buthewouldonlybehereforashortwhilebeforereturningtoLara,andIdidnotwanttoregretthistime.
Icamearoundabendinthehallwayandhalted,findingKillianoutsidemydoor.
“Killian,whatareyoudoing?”
“Icametoseeifyouwereallrightafterlastnight,”hesaid.“Butitseemsyouarejustfine.Didyouseekcomfortinyourhusband’sarms?”
Istiffenedathiscomment.“Thatisnoneofyourbusiness.”
“Ofcoursenot,YourMajesty.”Histonewasbiting,andIflexedmyfingersintoafist.Oneday,hewouldfeelthestingofmyblade,Iwascertainofit.
“Youshouldleave,”Isaid,movingpasthim,butasmyhandtouchedthehandle,hespoke.
“YouoncehatedthemasmuchasIdid.Whatchanged?”
“Ilearnedthetruth,”Isaid.
“Youhavebeenbrainwashed.”
Hiswordsmademepause,andIturnedtohimfully,takingonestepcloser.
“Thathasalwaysbeenyourissue,Killian.YouthinkIdonotknowmyownmind.Markmywords,itwillcostyoudearlyoneday.”
Itookastepback,andthenIenteredmyroom,lockingthedoorbehindme.
VioletaandVesnaarrivedonlyashorttimelater,andwebeganpreparationsforthecoronation.Istartedwithabath,andasthejasminedroppedintomywater,memoriesofthenightsI’dspentwithAdrianinthepoolrosetothesurfaceofmymind.IthoughtofAnathen.OfmyfirstdayinthecastlewhenVioletahaddroppedtheoilintomywater
LadyAnaMariasaiditwouldrelaxyou
Butithadnotbeenforrelaxingatall.Shehadusedittotriggermymemories.
Ana,mybestfriend,Ithought.Therewerenomemoriesyet,justtheknowledgeofhowclosewehadbeen.
Anhourlater,Iwasready.Vesnahadpinnedhalfmyhairupandlettherestfallinshiningwavesovermyshoulders.After,Violetahelpedmeintomydress,whichwasdesignedbyAdrian.Itwasblack,fittedfromthebodicetomyhips,whereitflaredintoafullskirt.Appliquésinadarkershadeofblackcurledlikeshadowinstrategicplaces,aroundmybreasts,myhips,andthehem.Thenecklinewascutlowandacollarnecklaceonlydrewmoreattention.Asimplepairofearringsglitteredinthedarknessofmyhairlikestarsintheinkysky,andasIstaredatmyselfinthemirror,Ifeltawakeforthefirsttime.
Iwasreadytobequeen.
Iwasreadytoconquer.
Justthen,thedooropened,andIturnedtofindthatAnahadarrived.WhileIknewIhadseenhermostdayssinceI’darrivedinRevekka,therewasanotherpartofmethatfeltasthoughithadbeenforever,andforthepartofmysoulthatknewher,itreallyhadbeen.
“Areyouallright?”sheasked.
Iopenedmymouthtotryandspeak,butnowordscameout.Iclearedmythroatandtriedagain,onlymanagingtosay,“Iknow.”
Ana’sfacemeltedintoasob,andshecoveredhermouth.“Wewaitedsolong.”
Ihuggedhertometightandonlylethergobecauseitwastimetoseemyfather.
Hewasinhisroomandsatathissmall,roundtableeatingbreakfast.Itwasoddtoseethathisusualroutinewasnotinterrupteddespiteachangeofscenery.
“Father,”Igreeted.
“Isolde,”hesaid.“Mygem.Youlookbeautiful.”
“Thankyou.”
Istoodawkwardlyinthemiddleofhisroomuntilhestoodandfacedme.
“Isolde,isthistrulywhatyouwant?”heasked.
Idrewmybrowstogether,confusedbyhisquestion.HehadnotaskedmewhenI’dagreedtomarryAdrianifthiswastrulywhatIhadwanted,becauseheknewithadn’tbeen.Butthatwasthen,andthiswasnow.
“Yes,”Isaid.Perhapsitwasthefactthatmymemorieshadawoken,butitwassomehoweasiertoadmittomydesires.
“Ifitisaqueendomyouwant,”hesaid,“thenIwillabdicate.Iwillgiveyoumythrone.”
“Father—”
Hewastalkingnonsense.
“Youcanendthis,Isolde,”hecutmeoff,speakingfirmly,andIblinked.
“What?”
“YoucankillAdrian.”
“No,Father,”Isaid,shakingmyhead.
“Endhim,andwhateverspellhehascastoveryouwillendtoo.Youwillknowwhenitisdone.Please,Isolde.”
“Icannotkillhim!”Isnapped.
“ThenIwillhelp.KillianandI.Wewill—”
“Youwouldhavetokillme!”Iyelled,andmyfatherblanched.Westaredateachotherinsilenceforamoment.
“Whatdidyousay?”
“Isaidthereisonlyonewaytokillhim,anditwouldmeanyou’dhavetokillme.”Iswallowedhard.IwasnotwillingtotellhimthatAdrianhadfedfromme,butIcouldconfirmotherthings.“Youwererightaboutacurse,butitwasn’twhatwethought.Ourfatesaretied,Father.IfIdie,hedies.”
IstaredatmyfatherasherealizedfullytheimpactofwhatIhadtoldhim.Ofeveryone,Icouldtrustmyfathertokeepthesecret.Hewouldneverwishharmuponme—hehadalmostgonetowarjustsohewouldnothavetogivemeuptotheBloodKing.
“Soyousee,”Iwhispered,“thereisnoway.”
Myfathershookhishead.“Isolde.”
“I’llbeallright,Father.Adrianwillprotectme.”
Therewasaknockatthedoor.“YourMajesties,”Anacalled.“Itistime.”
Itookafewsteps,closingthedistancebetweenus,pressingakisstohischeek.
“Iloveyou,”Isaid,andasIdrewaway,heheldmyfacebetweenhishands.
“Youarethehopeofourkingdom,Isolde.”
Anacollectedus,andtogetherwemadeourwaytothegreathall.IthadbeendecoratedwithflagsinAdrian’scolors—redandblackwithgoldaccents—buttherewasanadditiontohiscrest.Amongtherosesandthewolfwasasparrow.
Theroomwaspackedwithmanyofthesamepeopleaslastnightandsomeadditions.Onceagain,therewasatensionherethatateawayatmyskin,atensionthatIwasevenmoreawareofnowthatAdrianandIhadbonded.AndthoughIsawafewfriends—Daroc,Sorin,Isac,andMiha—wewereamongfarmoreenemies.
Anawalkedaheadofus,bowingtoAdrianbeforetakingherplacebesideDaroconthedais.Myfatherstrodebesideme,offeringhisarmasImademywaydowntheaisletowardAdrian,whostoodtallandproud,dressedallinblackandcrownediniron.Iheldhisgaze,fullofthingshehadsaidandwantedtosay.Iwonderedaboutmyfather,atthedesperationwithwhichhehadbeggedmetoendAdrian’slife.Hadmyadmissionbeenenough?Wouldhegiveuponthetaskandencourageotherstodothesame?
Wecametothebottomofthesteps,andmyfatherbowedbeforeascendingthestepstostandbesideKillianasthecoronationbegan.
“Myking,”IsaidtoAdriananddippedintoadeepcurtsy,thefoldsofmydressfanningoutaroundme.
Adrian’slipscurled.“IsYourMajestywillingtotaketheoath?”heasked.
“Iam.”
“DoyouswearbyyourkingtohonorandprotectthepeopleofRevekka?”
Itwasstrange,thenotionthatIwasagreeingtoprotectvampires,toprotectthekingdomIhadoncedespised,andyetIfoundmyselfagreeingwithmywholeheart,becauseIknewthetruthofthisworld.IhadseenthemurderofHighCovenbyapower-hungryking.Adrianwasnotthemonster—evilcouldlivewithinanycreature.Adrianwasthevengeance.
“Andwillyouuseyourpowerjustlyandmercifullyasitapplieswithintheboundsofourrule?”
“Iwill.”
“Andwillyouservebesidemeanduponmycounciltoexecuteourlaw?”
“Yes,”Ibreathed.
Adrian’seyesneverleftmineashespoke,andIfeltlikehewasseeingmethroughoutallmylifetimes.IwonderedifhehadeverguessedthisfutureforhimselflikeYeseniahad—likeIhad.
Anaapproachedholdingavelvetpillow,andAdriangatheredthecrownthatsatatopbetweenhishands.Itwasblackandiron,andthoughitsatheavilyuponmyhead,Iknewitbelongedthere.
“Rise,Isolde,queenofRevekka,futurequeenoftheNineHouses.”
Itookhishand,andasIdid,hekissedmyknuckles.
“Youaremylight,”hesaid.
“Andyouaremydarkness,”Ireplied.
Theywereoldwords,amemoryfrommypast,andtheyfeltjustasnaturalasAdrian’stouch.
HepulledmeuptheremainingstepsandintoakissthatIfeltdeepinmybelly.MyhandswenttohisfaceasIdevouredhimjustashungrily,andwhenhereleasedme,thecrowdbegantoclapandchant.
“Allhailtheking!Longlivethequeen!”
Iscannedthefacesgathered,notingthosewhojoinedthehymnandthosewhoremainedsilent—oneofthembeingmyfather.IfeltahorriblepanginmychestasIconnectedwithhishardstare.
“Allhailtheking!Longlivethequeen!”
Adrianstartedtoguidemedownthestepswhenthedoorstothegreathallwerethrownopenandinranaguardwhostumbledandfelltohisknees.
“CelCerediisunderattack!”
DreadtightenedmythroatasAdrianandIexchangedalook.
Webothknewwhoitwas.
Ravena.
Thecrimsonmist.
“Stay,”Adriansaid.“Gettohigherground,andIwillreturn.”Hekissedmyforeheadandasheleft,callingforDaroctojoinhim,Anahurriedtomyside.
“Sorin,”Adriancalled.“Staywiththequeen!”
Severalguardsfellintoranksbehindthem,andasIwatchedhimgo,agreatersenseofuneasewashedoverme.
“Youheardtheking,”Sorinsaid.“Higherground.”
Butashespoke,Gesalacsteppedintothecenteroftheroom,andIknewwhateverhisintentions,theywerenotgood.
Iliftedmychin.
“Soitappearsyouhavemadeittocoronationday,”hesaid.
“Doyouhavesomethingtosay,Noblesse?”
“Myqueen,”Sorinsaid,comingtostandbesideme.Heplacedahanduponmyarm.“Perhapsitwouldbebesttoretiretoyourroomwhereitissafe.”
HeattemptedtourgemetowardtheadjoiningroomwhereAdrianandIhadwaitedforcourt,butashedid,agroupofvampires—somenoblesse,includingtheone-eyedJulianandtheirvassalssurroundedus.Whentheydrewnearer,IfeltSorin’sbodytense,hisgrasponmetightening.Ana,too,turnedinanattempttoblockmefromtheironslaught.
IglaredatGesalac.
“Sothisishowitwillbe,”Isaid.
“Thisistreason,NoblesseGesalac,”Sorinsaid.
“Itisnottreason,”hesaid.“Itisrevenge.KingAdrianknowsathingortwoaboutrevenge,doeshenot?”
“Iamwarningyounottotouchme,”Isaid.
Thegroupwhosurroundedmelaughed.
“Whatisawarningfromamortal?Besides,youwouldnotwantanythingtohappentoyourfather,wouldyou?”
Gesalacnodded,andIturnedtofindthatmyfatherandKillianwererestrained.Ispuntofacemycaptor.“Youwantmetopayforkillingyourson,isthatit?”
“Iwantyoutopayforcominghereatall,forturningtheking’seyeawayfromhisprize.”
IfheknewAdrianatall,hewouldknowhehadalreadyclaimedit.
Iclickedmytongue.“Oh,thatringsofjealousy,Noblesse.”
“Adrianmaylikeyourmouth,butI,forone,cannotwaittocutoutyourtongue.”
“Didhenotwarnyou,”Isaidthroughmyteeth,“thatIamawarriorfirstandaqueensecond?”
Justthen,thedoorstothegreathallgroanedopenandawomanstaggeredinside.Ididnotrecognizeher,anddespitehermuddyclothing,Icouldseethatshehadlong,darkhairanddelicatefeatures—roundeyes,asmallnose,andsoftlips.
IheardAnagaspedbesideme.
“Isla!”Anacalledandattemptedtosprintdownthesteps,butshewasinstantlyrestrainedbyoneofthevampires.
“No!”Ireachedforher,butSorinheldmeinplaceasAnascreamedagainforIsla.
ThevassalstumbledandfelltoherkneesjustasGesalacbrokethecirclearoundmeandSorinandapproachedher.
“Don’tyoudare!Don’ttouchher!”Anashrieked.
Hebentandpickedthewomanupbyherhair,dragginghertoherfeet.Hetippedherheadbacksothatherneckwastaut.
“Yourvassal’slookingalittlewan,AnaMaria,”Gesalacsaid.“Perhapsweshouldendhersuffering.”
Ashespoke,however,Islabegantoconvulse.
“Isla!”Anascreamed.“Isla,no!”
Whatwashappening?
AnabrokefromofhercaptorandracedforIsla.
“Sorin!”Icommanded,andthevampirecaughtAnaaboutthewaistasaterrifyingsoundcamefromIsla’smouth.Itwassomethingakintoascream,andGesalacreleasedher.OnlyIsladidn’tfalltotheground.Shestoodwithherarmsspreadwideandherheadthrownback.Herlonghairbegantoriseandfloataroundher,andashermouthgaped,aredmistcamefromherthroat,curlingintotheair.
“It’shere!”oneofthenoblesseyelled.“Thecrimsonmistishere!”
Arushofbodieschargedtheexit,andmostofthecirclesurroundingmebrokeaway.
“Don’tletthequeenescape!”Gesalacyelled,andthoughhetriedtohurrybacktome,hecouldnotfighttherushofthecrowdastheyattemptedtoescapethemistthathadbeguntoconsumeonepersonafteranother.Horrifyingscreamsfilledtheroomasbodiesfell,skinned,totheground.
SorindraggedAnabackward,awayfromthereachingmist.
“Letmegotoher!Icanhelp!”Iheardheryell.
IwassocaughtupinAna’sanguish,Ididnotnoticeanyoneapproaching.Someonegrabbedmyshouldersandjerkedme.Astheydid,Ireachedformycrownandshoveditintomyattacker’sface.Hecriedoutandreleasedme,andIturnedtofindamortalhadattemptedtotakemehostage.Heheldhishandstohisbloodiedfacebutrecoveredenoughtogrowlatme,soIrammedthecrownintohisfaceoncemore.Hestumbledbackandfell,motionless.
“Isolde!”Sorincalled,holdingopenthedoortotheroomadjacenttothegreathall.Anawasnowhereinsight,andIguessedshe’dalreadygoneinside.
Iturned,searchingformyfather,findinghimjustashebenttoretrieveabladefromadownedmortal.
“I’vegothim!”Killiancalledtome.
Wefledinsidethesmallroom,shuttingthedoorbehindus.
“Whatthehellisthat?”Killianasked.
“It’scalledacrimsonmist,”Isaid.“It’swhatkilledthevillagersofVaida.”
Killianpaled,andmorescreamscamefromtheothersideofthedoor.Wedidnothavemuchtime.Themistwouldseepbeneaththecrackinthedoorandkillusall.
“Ineedyoutogetmyfatheroutofhere,”IsaidtoSorin.
“Andyou,YourMajesty.”
“No.Ravenaisheresomewhere,andIthinkIknowwhatshe’safter.”
“Icannotletyougoalone,”Sorinsaid.
“I’llgowithyou,”Anasaid.
“AndsowillI,”Killiansaid.Ilookedathim,shocked,butheshrugged.“Youaremyprincess.”
IlookedatSorin.“Getmyfatheroutofhere,thencomefindme.”
Henodded.Wesplitup—Sorinandmyfathertothewesttower,Ana,Killian,andItothelibrary.Weran,dodgingstaffandservantsandmembersofthecourt.Ididnotknowhowfastthemistcouldmoveorhowvisibleitwouldbeagainstallthered.Still,IlookedforitandforanysignofRavenainreflections.Now,withaccesstoYesenia’smemories—mymemories—IrecalledthatRavena’smagicwasportalmagic,thoughshewasrarelypowerfulenoughtocreateonewithoutsomekindofreflectivesurface,sosheoftenwalkedthroughmirrorsorwindows.
“Youthinkshe’sgoingafterTheBookofDis,”saidAna.
“Iknowshe’sgoingafterTheBookofDis.”
Lothianthoughtitwasblank,butitwasonlyblankbecauseitwasspelled.
AndI’dbeentheonetospellit.
Wecontinueddownhallafterhall,andjustaswereachedthefamiliarebonydoorsofthelibrary,Gesalacburstfrombehindthem.
Iskiddedtoahalt,flankedbyKillianandAna.
“Nowisnotthetimeforyourpettyrevenge,”Iseethed.
“Ifnotnow,when?Icanskinallthreeofyoualiveandclaimitwasthemist,”Gesalacsaid.
“Youwouldletyourpeoplesufferinfavorofmydeath?”
“Somerevengeisjusttoosweet,”Gesalacsaid,andasheliftedhisblade,InoticedAna’smouthmoving,whisperinghushedwords.Shewasrecitingaspell,butAnahadnomagic.Icouldnothearthewordsshespoke,soIdidnotknowwhatshesummoneduntilbluelightningsparkedatherfingertips,butitwasnowhereneartheshockshewouldneedtoattackGesalac.
“Speakitagain,”Iordered.
SheglancedatmeanddidasIinstructed.Themoreshedid,thegreaterthesparksgrew.Eachincantationmadethemstrongerandstronger;myonlyhopewasthatshewouldbeabletocontrolit.Otherwise,itmighthurther.
“Killian,givemeyoursword,”Isaid.
“Isolde—”
“Please,Killian,”Isaid.Herelented,andashehandedmehissword,Iwhispered,“ProtectAnaatallcosts.”
GesalacchuckledasIliftedmyblade.
“Areyougoingtofightme,warriorqueen?”
“Ifyouinsist,”Isaid.
Gesalac’sbladecamedownfirst.Itwasahardmove,straightdownanddirectedatmyhead.Iimaginehewantedtosplitmeintwo,butImovedquickly.Hisswordcaughtthehemofmydresswhileminecaughthisarm,drawingdarkblood.
Hegrowled,andIsuspectedhethoughtthatwouldbehiskillingblow.
Ihadtoadmit,Iwasunnervedthathe’dcutmydress.ItmeantIhadbarelymovedfastenough,andifhekeptstrikinglikethat,Iwouldn’tmakeit.
Gesalacpickeduphisswordagainandswung.Thistime,Iattemptedtodeflect,buttheimpactrattledmybones,andIalmostlostmygriponmyblade.Itwasamistake,andGesalacusedtheopportunitytoswingoncemore,knockingitfrommygrip.JustashemovedforwhatIwascertainwouldbeakillingblow,aknifewhirledthroughtheairandlodgedsquareinhischest.
Killian,Ithoughtasthenoblesseroared,andIbenttoscoopupmyblade.
“Ana!”Icalledandflungoutmyhand.JustasIdid,shereachedforme,andIfeltthesurgeofthemagicshe’dsummonedworkitswaythroughmybodyintothehiltofthesword.IsunkitintoGesalac’sheart,andheconvulsedaroundtheblade.IdidnotletgoofAnauntilhenolongermoved.
“Ishe…?”Anaasked.
“Notdead,”Isaid.Hehadnobeatinghearttostop;theonlythingitwoulddowasparalyzehimforafewhours.Istaredather.“Youneversaidyouwerelearningspells,”Isaid,andAnashrugged.
“Youpickupafewthingsalongtheway.”
Thesoundofshatteredglassdrewmyattention.
“No!”
Iranintothelibrary,totheglasscasesthatcontainedtheHighCoven’srelics,andIfoundeachcaseintact.TheBookofDiswasstillthere,butasIstared,afacelookedbackatme.
“Ravena.”
Shesmiled.
“Yesenia,”shesaid.“OrshouldIcallyouIsolde?”
Inarrowedmyeyes.Didheruseofmyoldnamemeansheknewmymemorieshadbeenawakened?DidsheknowaboutthebloodlettingandthesubsequentbondbetweenAdrianandme?
“Whatareyoudoing?”Iasked.
“Takingwhatwasstolenfromme,”shesaid.
“TheBookofDiswasneveryours,”Isaid.Itwasmine—Yesenia’s.
“It’snotaboutthebook.It’saboutwhatitcangiveme,”shesaid.
Ishookmyhead.“Thatbookwilltakeasmuchfromyouasyouaskofit,”Isaid.“Isthatwhatyouwant?”
“Iwantpower,”shesaid,andhervoiceshook.
Suddenly,thecaseexploded,andIcoveredmyheadasIwasshoweredinglass.Piecesofitbitintomyskin,butIdidnothavetimetoreact,becauseasIrosefromtheshelterofmyarm,Isawthatthebookwasgone,andinitsplacewasabubbling,redmist.
“Fuck!”IyelledandturnedtorunjustasKillianandAnacaughtupwithme.“Tothewesttower!Now!”
WeracedthroughhallwayafterhallwayuntilIroundedthecornerandcameface-to-facewiththemist.Killianreachedformeandjerkedmeback.Ithadfilledmostofthehallwayinfrontofus,completelybarringusfromtheothersideofthecastle.
“Fuck!”Isaidagain.
“Isolde!”Anacalled,turningtorundowntheoppositehallway.Iknewwhereshewasgoing,andIcaughtupwithherasshewaspullingopenanear-invisibledoor—thesecretcorridors.
Itwasquieterinthepassageway.Ourbreathswereragged,ourheartspounding.IkeptmyhandspressedagainsteithersideofthewallasIfollowedAnainthedarkness.Whenweemergedontheotherside,themistwasbehindus,butitroiledandbuilt,gatheringlikeawallofcloudandfollowing.
“WehavetogettoSorin,”Isaid.
Iwasn’tevensurehewouldstillbeatopthetower.Itwaspossiblehehadgottenmyfathertosafetyandlefttofindus.Whatifwedidnotcrosspaths?Whatifhegotcaughtinthemist?Ipushedmyworryaway.Sorincouldfly;ifanything,hehadthebestchanceofescapeofanyofus.
Iwasinthelead,mylegsburningasItriedtocarrymyselffasterandfastertomyfather.AsIcrestedthetopofthestairsandrandownthecenterofthehallofmirrors,themistroiledbehindme,cuttingoffKillianandAna’spursuit.
“No!”Iscreamedandturnedbackforthem,butthemistwasalreadyuptoKillian’swaist.Istaredatbothofthem,wide-eyedandfearful.
“Don’tletitconsumeyou,”Isaid.“Gettosafety.”
“Wecan’tleaveyou!”hesaid.
“Youcan.Gettosafety!”
Iwatchedhimhesitate,andIknewhewasassessingwhetherhecouldmakeitifherantowardme.
“Bythefuckinggoddess,leave,Killian!GetAnaoutofhere!Thatisanorder!”
Hisjawticked,butherelented,andawaveofreliefwashedovermeasIsawthemretreatbeforethemistfilledtheendofthehall.
Iturnedandsprintedtothestairwellwhichwasplungedintodarkness,onlytobehithardinthechestasIreachedthetop.Itriedtogripsomething—anything—buttherewasnothing.Itumbledbackward,fallingandrollinguntilIcametoastopatthebottomofthestairs.
Icouldn’tbreathe,myribshurtsobadly.Igroaned,rollingontomybackasIattemptedtocatchmybreath,confused,whentheblurryimageofmyfatherwalkedintoview.
“Father?”Iasked.
“I’msorry,Isolde,”hesaid,andheliftedhisblade.“Butthisisthesacrificeofaqueen.”
“Father!”
Irolledashisswordcamedown,grazingmyside,andhitthestonefloorbeneathme.Hecontinuedtowardmeandtriedoncemoretobringthebladedownuponmybruisedbody.Itriedtoscrambletomyfeet,butaharshpushsentmetothegroundagain,andasIbegantocrawlawayfrommyfather,Isobbed.
“Whatareyoudoing?”
Iwassoweakandsotired.Mychestburned,myribssentanechoingpainthroughmywholebody,andIwasmoredizzythanI’deverbeen.
“Whatyoushouldhavedonethemomentyoudiscoveredyouwerehisweakness!”myfatheryelledandplacedhisbootedfootagainstmyside,sendingmetomyback.
“Youwantedmetokillmyself?”Iasked,disgusted.“Forwhom?Forakingdomofpeoplewhoturnedtheirbacksonmeformysacrifice?”
“Itisforthegreatergood!”hesaid.“NotjustyourpeoplebutthewholeofCordova.”
“Evenmymother’speople?”Iasked,myvoicequiet,calm.“Becauseyouleftthemenslaved,andthatdoesnotsoundlikethegreatergood.”
Themistwasgainingonus.Ihadneverbeenthisclosetoit,butnowIcouldfeelitsmagic.Ittingledwithanelectricpulsethatraisedthehaironmyarms,anditremindedmeofwhoIwasandwhereIhadcomefrom.
IwasYeseniaofAroth.
Asmyfatherthrusttheendofhisbladetowardmychest,Icaughtitbetweenmyhands.Itcutintomypalms,andblooddrippedontomyskin.
“Father,”Isaid,tearsspillingdownmyface.“Pleasedon’t.”
“Wereyounotpreparedbeforetodowhateverittooktosaveyourpeople?Whathaschanged?Love?”
Everythinghadchanged.
Itwasn’tjustAdrian.Itwasmywholeworld.ThepeopleIhadoncetrustedwerenowmyenemies.Thepeoplewhohadbeenmyenemies—whomIhaddetestedforsolong—weretheonlyonesIdaredbelieve.Andattherootofallofitwashim—myfather.Thefoundationfromwhichmylifeoflieshadbegun.
Igroundmyteeth,jerkingsuddenly,knockingthebladeawayandshovingmyfeetintomyfather’sknees.Hegruntedandwentdown.ThenIkickedhiminthechest,andhefellontohisback,losinghisswordintheprocess.Iscrambledforitandtookitintomyslickpalm.AsIrosetomyfeet,hecametohisknees.Ipointedthebladeathim,andheliftedhishandsinsurrender.Themistbehindhimwasabloodycurtain.
Ishookmyhead,sniffing.Iwantedtobreakcompletely,tofalltothefloorandsobendlessly.Myfatherhadtriedtokillme.
“Youwouldberenowned,”hetriedtoreason.“NotjustinLarabutallofCordova.Isthatnotwhatyouwant?”
Ididnotwanttodieahero.
Iwantedtoliveasaconqueror.
“Iwantedtobeaqueen,Father,andnowIam,”Isaid.Ilethisbladefalltomyside.“Gohome.”Istarteddownthehalltowardthestairwell.Iwantedfreshair,andIwantedtosleepforever.
Imadeittwostepsbeforehelaunchedhimselfatme,andasIturned,Islidmybladethroughhisstomach.Hiseyeswidenedinshock,bloodspillingfromhismouth,andashefelltohisknees,Iwentwithhim.
“I’msosorry,”Isaid.
Theonlythingmyfathercouldofferwasachokedsoundwhenhelandedonhisside,andasIwatchedhimdie,Icried.
“Whatahorriblethingtohavelostaparent,andbyyourownhand.”
Ravena’svoiceechoedallaround,andmyspinestiffenedatthesoundofit.Ilookedupandaroundbutdidnotseeher.
“Itishorrible,”Isaid.“Theburdenofakinslayerisgreat,butyouwouldknowsomethingaboutthat,wouldn’tyou?”
“Oh,”shebreathed,andthensheappearedineverymirroralongthehall.Shewasuntouchedbybattle—perfecthairbraidedtorestoverhershoulder,herwhiterobesfartoopristine.Itwashowshealwaysfought—throughothersorfromafar—butoneday,shewouldknowthebiteofablade,andIwantedittobefromme.
SheheldTheBookofDiscradledinherarm,anditignitedsomethinginsideme,adeepandgrowingangerIdidnotcompletelyunderstand.Iwastwopeoplenow,andIonlyknewasmuchastheotherwouldgive.
“ThewitchesofHighCovenwerenevermysisters,”shesaid.
“Theylovedyou—”
“Donot!”sheshouted,andinthatmoment,herfacechanged.Shelookedolderandhatefilled.Hereyesseemedtosinkintoherheadanddarken,takingonwhatIcouldonlydescribeasanevilexpression.Thisiswhoshetrulyis,Ithought.Thisiswhatherpathtopowerhascosther.
“Donotsaytheylovedme!Donotsayyoulovedme!”
Istaredather,breathinghard.IrecalledcaringforRavena,butshesoughtpowerbeyondtherulesofHighCoven,anditwasn’tuntilshe’dtriedtouseitthatshewasexiledandacurseputuponherownmagic.
Itwaswhyherspellsdidnotworkastheyweresupposedto—becauseshewasforbiddenfrompracticingmagic.
“Doyouknowheneverwantedme?”Ravenasaid.
“Ravena—”
“IwasDragos’slastresort,”shesaid.
Themistcreptcloserasshespoke,andIreachedformyfather’sblade,pullingitfreefromhisbody.Ihadnochoicebuttoleavehimandretreat.AsIdid,Ipassedmirroraftermirror,fullofRavena’sreflection.
“Atleastyouendedupbyhisside,”Isaid.“Therestofusturnedtoash.”
Ihadnosympathyforherplight.
Shewasthereasonmysistersweredead.
“Tellme,”Isaid,continuingmyslowwalkdownthehall.Oneofthesewasnotanillusion—oneofthesewasaportal.Oneofthemwouldbringmeface-to-facewiththerealRavena.“Didyoukillusallbecauseyouknewyou’dneverbehischoiceunlesstherestofusweredead?”
Ravena’sangersurged,andtherewasanoldpartofmethatfeltitlikeatangiblething.Iwasgettingcloser.
“Yourpowercouldhavebeengreat.Itwasyourmindthatwasweak.”
“Mymind?”shesnapped.“Saysthewitchwhofellinlovewithamortal.Eveninthislife,youhaven’tchanged.Tellme,didyouenjoythebloodletting?”
Acoldsenseofdreadwashedoverme.
Soshedidknow.
“Youlethimcompromisetheonethingyoushouldhavecoveted—yourlife.Nowwhoisweak?”
Itookslowersteps,herangerwasawallasredasthemistadvancinguponme.
“Adrian’slovehasalwaysgivenmepower,”Isaid.“Itiswhatbroughtmebacktolife.”
Thatwasn’talieoranexaggeration.
Ibeggedforyou,he’dsaid.
“Youareafool,”Ravenaspat.
“Iamqueen,”Isaid.“Anddespiteallyouhavedone,youareapowerlesswitchwhohidesinmirrors.”
Herangerflashedbright.Ittookeverythinginmenottoreacttoit,nottoturnthenandletherknowI’dfoundher.
“Notforlong.Ihavethebook.”
Ismiled.“AndIwroteit.”
ShedidnotneedtoknowthatIhadnotrecalledasinglespell,thatIhadyettorememberwhyI’devenbegunwritingitinthefirstplace.
“Pityyouwerenotbornwithmagicinthislife,”shenowmocked.“Howwillyoueverdefeatme?”
“Idonotneedmagictodefeatyou,Ravena.”
“Oh?”sheasked,amused.“Tellmethen,ifnotmagic,whatdoyouneed?”
“Patience,”Isaid.
ThenIshiftedandflungmyblade.ItpiercedoneofthemirrorsandlodgedinRavena’schest.Bloodspatteredfromhermouthontotheglass.Ireachedforanearbycandlestickandswung,shatteringit,butIknewRavenawasgonewhenthemistvanished.
Istoodforamoment,breathinghard,andtheweightofwhatIhadjustdone—ofthiswholeday—crasheddownuponme.
Iscreamed.
Iraged.
Ibrokeeverymirrorleftinthehallway,andwhenIwasfinished,Imademywayupstairs,tothetopofthetower.There,IsanktothegroundtorestbeneaththeredskyofRevekka,andIknewthiswasthepainthatwouldmakemeintoamonster.
***
WhenIopenedmyeyesagain,Adrianhoveredoverme,expressiongrim.Angerwasetchedintohisbrowsandthehollowsofhischeeks.IbrokewhenIsawhim.Myanguishwasaphysicalthingthathadinvadedandwarpedmybody.Iwouldneverbethesame.Myfatherwasdead.Themanwhohadraisedme,whomIhadlookedtoforguidance,whomIhadidealizedasagreatking,hadtriedtoendmylifeforthegreatergood.
Forthegreatergood.
Ikeptrepeatinghisattackinmyheadandhearinghiswords,butIwasnoclosertounderstanding.
Adriankneltandgatheredmeintohisarms,andIsobbedintothehollowofhisneck.ThenextthingIrememberedwaswakingupbesidehim.Ilayonmystomach,myhandcurledbeneathmyhead,andwhenImethisgaze,moretearssprangtomyeyes.Iwasexhausted,Iwastiredofcrying,butIcouldnotholdontoanythingbutmypain.
Hereachedoutandbrushedthemaway.
“DoyouknowwhyIcallyouSparrow?”heasked,hisvoiceaquietwhisper.
Ishookmyhead.Ihadassumedithadsomethingtodowithmyvulnerabilityhereamongsomanyvampires,andrightnow,IfelteverybitthemortalIwas.
“Thesparrowissoughtafterbymanymonsters,butsheiscunningandresourceful,andshealwayswins.”
Ashespoke,mythroattightened,andthetearsburningmyeyeswererenewedoncemore.
“Youhavetheheartofasparrow,evenamongwolves,”hesaid,andhislipspressedhardagainstmyforehead.Whenhepulledaway,headded,“Itshouldhavebeenme.Mybladethatcuthimdown,notyours.”
“No,”Isaid.
Itwasrightthatithadbeenme.Ifhehaddiedbyanyotherhand,Icouldnothaveforgiventhem,justasIwouldneverforgivemyself.
“Ifailedyou.Ipromisedtoprotectyou.”
“Howcouldyouhaveknown?”
“Itisnotaboutknowing.Isworeanoath.”
“Tomyfather,whocouldnotevenkeepit.”
AsIspoke,mylipsquivered,andIcouldseehestruggledjustasmuch,hiseyesreflectingthetormentofmyheart.Thepainandangerandsadness—eventheshock.WhowouldhavesuspectedIwouldnotbesafewithmyownfather?
“Thenletmeswearanewonetoyou,”hesaid.“Iwillneverletanythinghurtyoulikethisagain.”
Nothingcouldhurtlikethis,unlessIlosthim.Iwouldhavemadethesameoathtohim,buthiswasalreadyfulfilled.Hewouldneverlivewithoutme.
“Adrian,”Iwhisperedhisnameandtouchedhisface,myfingerstwistingintohishair.“Ravenaknew.”
Hisexpressionhardened.
“Ravenaknewaboutthebloodletting,whichmeansoneofyourfourisatraitor.”
Itwasagreaterblow.Itwasnotasifwehadmanypeopletotrust.Thenoblessewerenottobetrusted.Thefourweretrusted…untilnow.WhobetweenDaroc,Sorin,Ana,andTanakawouldhavetold?Haditbeenamistake?Amomentofweakness?
Ialsotoldhimofthenoblessewhohadbetrayedhim—ofGesalacandJulian—buthewasnotsurprisedandadmittedthattheyhadfled.
“Sorinishunting,butIdonotthinkhewillfindthem.”
“Whatwillyoudo?”Iwhispered.
Hestudiedmeforamomentandthenanswered,“Wewillwait.Sometimesatraitoristheleverageweneed.”
Strangely,Iwonderedifthiswaswhatitmeanttobequeen—neverfullytrustinganyonebutmyking.
***
Wewouldburnmyfather,forgoingthetraditionalburialofmypeople.Itwasaninsult,becausenokingofLarahadevenbeenconsumedbyfire,andyetasIwatchedthefinalbeamfallintoplaceatopthepyre,Ididnotregretmydecision
IstoodinthecourtyardoftheRedPalace,wearingblueandsilver,thecolorsofmyhouse.Itwasnotformyfatherbutformyself.Isawthisasmyfuneraltoo—thedeathofthewomanIusedtobe.
Fewjoinedusfortheburning.AnaandKillianstoodonmyleftandAdrianonmyright.BesidehimwereDarocandSorinandbehindthem,IsacandMiha.Tanakaandtheremainderofthenoblessewerescatteredabout.Itriednottolookatthemwithmistrust,triednottothinkthatoneamongfourofAdrian’sclosestfriendswasatraitor,andyetIcouldnotlettheknowledgefalltothebackofmymind.
Wehadatraitor.
Withthatthought,ImovedclosertoAdrian,andhewelcomedme,hisfingersslidingbetweenmineasmyfatherwascarriedfromthecastle.Hewaswrappedinwhite,andwhatwasleftofhisbloodsoakedthroughthefabric,hisskinhavingbeeneatenawayfromhisbodybythemist.
Mymiserywasacute,bothbecausemyfatherwasdeadandbecausehehadtriedtokillme.Iwasstillnotovertheshockofit,andIhadbarelyslept,becauseeachtimeIclosedmyeyes,Inolongersawburningpyresatmyfeet—Isawmyfatherstandingovermewithasword.
Howhadwegonefromonlyhavingeachothertothis?HowhadIgonefrombeinghisgem—thesaviorofourpeople—totheenemy?
Wasthatthedutyofaking?
Toensurethegreatergood?
Ididnotcareforthegreatergood.
Iwantedwhatwasgoodforme,whatwouldensureIlivedlongenoughtosavemymother’speople,protectthoseIcalledmyown,defeatRavena,andbecomequeenofallwhowouldharmme.
Thatwasmygreatergood.
Besideme,Adrianlookedsolemn,andIknewitwasbothbecauseheknewmyhurtandbecausehehadnotbeenheretohelpme.Mychesttightenedathowhe’dlookedatme,howhe’dswornasecondoath,anoathhehadsaidhewouldneveroffer,andyetthatwashowIknewhelovedme.
“Whathappensnow?”Iasked.
Wewatchedasaguardmovedforwardtolightthepyre.Thefirecaughtquickly.Itremindedmeofhowfastithadconsumedthewoodatmyfeettwohundredyearsago.
Theflamesburnedhot,andnormally,Iwouldtrytokeepmydistance,thefearofflamesandsmokeatrigger,butthistime,Ididnotmove,andIwatchedmyfather’sbodyburnthroughblurryeyes.
“WemustfindandkillRavena,”hesaid.“Iimagineshewillcontinueattemptingtoperfecthermist.”
TheattackonCelCeredihadtakenmanylives.Thosefuneralswouldbeheldinthecomingdays.AmongthosewewouldburywasIsla,Ana’slover.
IglancedatAna,paleandquiet,andreachedforherhand.
Shedidnotlookatme—shehadn’tlookedatanyonesinceIsla’sdeath,butshesqueezedmyhand,andatleastthatwasacomfort.Icouldnotimaginewhatshewasgoingthrough.Intruth,Ididnotwanttoknow,butIfeltforherinawaythatmademychestacheandguiltsettleheavilyuponmyheart.Ihadnotbeenabletoevenbroachthesubjectwithher,tooconsumedinmyownstrangegrief
“AndKingGheroghe?”Iasked.“Whenwillhepayforwhathedidtomypeople?”
“Soon,Sparrow,”Adriansaid.
Thepyrecollapsed,andFather’sbodycrashedtothestoneground,sendingsparksandashflying.Iwatched,unblinkingaseverybitofhimwasreducedtoash.Untiltherewereonlyscorchedbonesleft,anditwasasIsawtheeyesofhisskull—vacantandfullofsmokeandfire—thatIrememberedwhyI’dwrittenTheBookofDis
Itwasabookofspells.Itwasabookofdarkmagic.
ThekindHighCovenhadoutlawed.
Thekindthatcouldraisethedead.DiscovertheworldofNewGreeceinScarlettSt.Clair’sfirstbookintheHadesSaga
AGameofFate
AvailablenowfromBloomBooks
Makesomeonefallinlovewithyou.
ThewordswereacrueltauntthatechoedinHades’smindasheprowledthedarknessofhisclubtoclearhishead.
PerhapshehadgonetoofarincriticizingAphrodite’schoicetoaskZeusforadivorce,butHadesknewthegoddesslovedHephaestus,andratherthanadmitit,shethoughttoforcetheGodofFireintoexpressinghisfeelingsbygoadinghim.WhatAphroditefailedtounderstandwasthatnoteveryoneworkedlikeshedid,leastofallHephaestus.Ifshewonhislove,itwouldbethroughpatience,kindness,andattention.
Itwouldmeanshewouldhavetobevulnerable,somethingAphrodite,goddessandwarrior,despised.
Andifheunderstoodanything,itwasthat.Aphrodite’schallengeforcedhimtoacknowledgehisownvulnerabilities,hisweaknesses.Hefrownedatthenotionoffindingsomeonewhowantedtocarryhisshame,hissins,hismalice,butifhefailed,theFateswouldgetinvolved,andheknewwhattheywouldrequireifhereturnedBasiltothelandoftheliving.
Asoulforasoul.
Someonewouldhavetodie,andhewouldnothaveasayintheFates’victim.
Thethoughtmadehisbodytighten,anotherthreadaddedtotheothersmarringhisskin.Hehatedit,butitwasthepriceofmaintainingbalanceintheworld.
Asmellbroughthimoutofhisthoughtsandgavehimpause.Itwasfamiliar—wildflowers,bothbitterandsweet.
Demeter,hethought.
TheGoddessofHarvest’snamewassouronhistongue.Demeterhadfewpassionsinlife,butoneofthemwasherhatredfortheGodoftheDead.
Heinhaledagain,takingthescentdeeper.Somethingaboutitwasoff.Mingledwiththefamiliararomawasthesweetnessofvanillaandamild,herbalnoteoflavender.Amortal,perhaps?Someonewiththegoddess’sfavor?
Thescentdrewhimoutofthedarknessinwhichhehadlingeredtotheedgeofthebalcony,wherehescannedthecrowdandfoundherimmediately.
Thewomanwhosmelledlikevanilla,lavender,andhisenemysatpoisedontheedgeofoneofhissofasinapinkdressthatleftlittletotheimagination.Helikedthewayherhaircurled,fallinginluminouswavesdownherback.Hisfingersitchedtotouchit,topullituntilherheadtippedbackandshelookedhimintheeyes.
Lookatme,hecommanded,desperatetoseeherface.
Sheseemedtolookeverywherebeforehergazehaltedonhim.Hishandtightenedaroundhisglass,theothergrippedthebalconyrail.
Shewasbeautiful—lushlips,highcheekbones,andeyesasgreenasnewspring.Herexpressionwasstartledatfirst,eyeswideningslightly,transformingintosomethingfierceandpassionateashergazeswepthisfaceandform.
Sheisyours,avoiceechoedinhishead,andsomethinginsidehimsnapped.Claimher
Thecommandwasferal.Hehadtogrindhisteethtokeepfromobeying,andhethoughthemightshattertheglassinhishandfromclutchingittootight.TheimpulsetowhiskherawaytotheUnderworldwasstrong,likeaspell.Hehadneverthoughthimselfsoweak,buthisrestraintwasathin,frayedthread.
Howcouldhewantthiswomansobadly?Whatwasthisunnaturalpull?Hestaredatherharder,searchingforareason,andbecameawarethathewasnottheonlyonefeelingtheeffectsoftheirconnection.Shefidgetedbeneathhisgaze,herchestrisingandfallingasherbreathhitched,herskinturningaprettypink,andhehadthethoughtthathewouldliketofollowthatflushwithhislips.
Hewouldgiveanythingtoknowwhatshewasthinking.
Hewassopreoccupiedbyhisownsalaciousthoughts,hehadnotfeltanyoneapproachuntilarmssnakedaroundhiswaist.Hereactedquickly,latchingontothehandsthatheldhim,andtwistedtofaceMinthe.
“Distracted,mylord?”shepurred,amused.
“Minthe,”hesnapped,releasingherarms.“CanIhelpyou?”
Hewasfrustratedbytheinterruption,butalsograteful.Ifhestaredatthewomananylonger,hemighthavelefthispositiononthebalconyandgonetoher.
“Alreadyzeroinginonyourprey?”sheasked.
Foramoment,Hadesdidnotunderstandhercomment,andthenhemadetheconnection.Mintheassumedhewassearchingforapotentialloveinterest,someonewhocouldhelphimfulfillAphrodite’sbargain.
“Listeningintheshadowsagain,Minthe?”
Thenymphshrugged.“ItiswhatIdo.”
“Yougatherinformationforme,”hesaid.“Notonme.”
“HowelseamIsupposedtokeepyououtoftrouble?”
Hesnorted.“I’mmillionsofyearsold.Icantakecareofmyself.”
“IsthathowyouendedupinabargainwithAphrodite?”
Henarrowedhisgaze,thenliftedhisglass.“DidInottellyouIamnottohaveanemptyglasstonight?”
Shegaveherbestfuckyousmileandbowed.“Rightaway,mylord.”
HemadesureMinthewasnolongerwithinsightbeforereturninghisgazetothefloor.Thewomanhadturnedbacktoherfriends.
Hadesstudiedtheminanattempttodiscernthekindofcompanyshekept,whenhenoticedsomeonehewasnotparticularlyfondof—amannamedAdonis.HewasoneofAphrodite’sfavoredmortals.Why,hehadnoidea.ThemortalwasaliarandhadaheartasdarkastheStyx,buthesupposedtheGoddessofLovehadahardtimelookingpasthisprettyface.
Hehopedthewomandidnotsharethatquality.Hefrowned,wonderingifshewouldleavetheclubwithhimtonight,andthenscoldedhimselfforhavingthesethoughts.Hisconcernshouldgoasfarasfearingforherwell-beingforthemerefactthatAphroditewasfondofpunishinganyonewhogaveherloverstoomuchattention.
“Yourdrink,mylord,”Iliassaid.
Hadesglancedatthesatyr,relievedthathehadsensedhisapproach.
Iliascouldbebestdescribedasanotherassistant.HehadworkedforHadesalmostaslongasMinthe,fillingroleswhereverHadesneeded:bartendingatNevernight,managinghisrestaurants,andenforcingHades’sruleintheUpperworld.Hewasbestatthelatter.Withanunassuming,pleasantappearance,Hades’senemieswereoftensurprisedbyIlias’sruthlessness.
Hadesdidnotoftenemploysatyrs.Theywerewild,pronetodrunkennessandseduction,butIliaswasdifferentandnotbychoice.Hehadseveredtieswithhistribeaftertheybetrayedhim,rapingawomanheloved.ShehadkilledherselfandIliashadkilledthem.
Hadestooktheglass,andbeforehethoughttoolongonthesubject,said,“Ihaveajobforyou.”
“Yes,mylord?”
Hadesnoddedtothewomanwhohadtriggeredhimwithhergoldenhairandgreeneyes.
“Thatwoman,Iwanttoknowifsheleaveswithanyone.”
SilencefollowedHades’sorder,andwhenthegodlookedatIlias,hewasstaringback,browraised.“Issheindanger,mylord?”
Yes,hethought,shewasindangerofneverleavingthisplace.Somethinginsidehimwantedtodisregardeverycivilityandpossessher.Somethingabouthercalledtohim—athreadthatpulledathisheart.
Hefrozeasthosewordssurfacedinhismind,eyesnarrowing,andthought,Itcannotbe
HadespeeledbacklayerafterlayerofglamourthatkepthisvisionshieldedfromtheetherealThreadsofFate.Theywerelikeshimmeringspiderwebsconnectingpeopleandthings—somewerewisps,othersweresolid.Theirstrengthwaxedandwanedthroughoutlife.Thewholefloorwaslikeanet,butHadeswasonlyfocusedonone,fragilecordthatranfromhischesttothewomaninshimmeringpink.
FuckingFates.
WantmoreScarlettSt.Clair?
OrderAGameofFateAuthor’sNote
IthinkmyfavoritethingaboutwritingfantasyromanceisthatIcanhavethesefantasticalsettingsandstillwritecharacterswhohandleoureverydayemotionsandchallenges.Thisbookbeganwithtwocharactersfightingoverasortofarranged/sortofforcedmarriageandevolvedintoastoryaboutidentityandchoosingwhatisbestforyounomattertheopinionofothers.
IamonlygoingtogointoafewdetailsaboutthevampiremythologyandmonstersinthisbookbecauseIdiduseaparticularguideasareferenceforeverycreatureyouencounterinthesepages.IlearnedfromreadingTheresaBane’sEncyclopediaofVampireMythologythatthereareactuallyhundredsofiterationsofvampiresacrosstheworldandacrossculturesandtheyareallbaseduponwhatpeoplefearmost.SoasIwrotethisbook,Ifirstconsideredwhatthisworldwouldfearmost.
Turnsout,theyfearedsomethingstrongerthanthemselves.Youcanseethisinthehistoryofthekings,whomurderedwitchesforfearofbeingovertaken,andsoDis,thegoddessofspirit,decidedtocreateacreaturethatreallycoulddothat—andAdrian,well,hetookittoanextreme.
OtherabilitiesIadaptedfromthemythologyofvariousvampiresbutalso,inparticular,thefamousDraculaare:theabilitytoshapeshiftintoananimaloramist.Youseetheseparallelsinafewwaysthroughoutthebook.First,Draculawassaidtobeabletoturnintoawolf(amongothercreatures).IdidnotfeellikeAdriancouldshapeshift,soIusedthewolfasasymbolforhiscrest.YoualsoseeshapeshiftingwithSorin,whocouldturnintoafalcon.(Othervampireswerenotedasbeingabletoturnintovulturesorbats).Themistreferencecomesintheformofthecrimsonmistwhich,atonepoint,Isoldethoughtavampirewasresponsiblefor.
Ialsodecidedtomaintainthatthesunwasdeadlytovampires,butIhadalwaysseenRevekkawitharedsky.Adrian,ofcourse,wasthefirstvampireandmuchstronger,sohe,likeDracula,wasstillabletomoveinfadingsunlight,anditwasnotfataltohim.
Outsideofvampires,everymonsterinthisbookisalsosomekindofvampire.Youwillrecognizemanyofthembecauseyou’veheardthemacrossvariousstories,includingLamia,whofedonchildren(ifyouhavereadATouchofMalice,Ireferencedthismyth).
IalsomustmakeanotethatwhileIknowmanymakeconnectionsbetweenVladtheImpalerandDraculabyBramStoker,IhighlyencourageyoutoreadabouttherealVladIII.Therearemanyatrocitiesattributedtohim,thoughIfeellikeit’salwaystakenoutofthecontextofthetimeandhismotivationsforconqueringarenevermentioned
Thankyousomuchtomyreaders.Iappreciateyouall—withoutyou,mydreamswouldnothavecometrue.IhopeyoulovedthestoryofAdrianandIsolde.Ihopeyoulovedtheirfriendsandtheirworld.Icannotwaittosharethenextbookwithyou!
—ScarlettAbouttheAuthor
ScarlettSt.ClairlivesinOklahomawithherexcellentdog.Shehasamaster’sdegreeinlibraryscienceandinformationstudies.SheisobsessedwithGreekmythology,murdermysteries,love,andtheafterlife.Forinformationonbooks,tourdates,andcontent,pleasevisitscarlettstclair.comThankyouforreadingthisSourcebookseBook!
Joinourmailinglisttostayintheknowandreceivespecialoffersandbonuscontentonyourfavoritebooksandauthors!
CLICKHERETOSIGNUP
BooksChangeLives