The Billionaire’s Obsession ~ Simon (Florida Billionaires #1) (The Billionaire’s Obsession, Book 1)

TheBillionaire’sObsession
Copyright?2013byJ.S.Scott
Allrightsreserved.Thisbookoranyportionthereofmaynotbereproducedorusedinanymannerwhatsoeverwithouttheexpresswrittenpermissionofthepublisherorauthor,exceptfortheuseofbriefquotationsinabookreview.Thestorycontainedwithinistheworkoffiction.Namesandcharactersaretheproductoftheauthor’simaginationandanyresemblancetoactualperson’slivingordead,isentirelycoincidental.
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HeartoftheBillionaireSimonHudsonstoodsilentlyintheshadowsoftheopulentlobby,hishandsinthepocketsofhisjeansandoneshoulderproppedagainsttheframeofalargewindowthatfacedthestreet.Hiswholebodywastense,hisdarkbrowneyesscanningthesidewalkwiththeintenseandtotalfocusofamadman.
Whereinthehellisshe?It’stenforty-five.
HeknewKarawasworkingtonight.Shehadcalledinsickforthelasttwoevenings,butwasbacktoworkatHelen’sPlace,waitingtablesontheswingshift.Hehadchecked.HismotherownedthebistrowhereKaraworkedandwasgenerallyprettyforthcomingwithinformationwhenSimonwantedit,buthewascareful.Ifhewasn’t,hisonlyparentwouldbehoundinghimtofindoutwhyhewantedinformationonKara.HiswonderfulbutinquisitivemomwouldbelikeabloodhoundafterascentifshethoughtthatSimon’sinterestwasanythingbutcasual.Hewouldbenaggedtodeath,hismotherwantingtoknowexactlywhathisintentionswerewithKara.
Simonfrowned.Likehehadanyintentions?HehadfantasiesandalloftheminvolvedKaraspreadoutonhisbed,screaminghisnameashemadehercome,overandover.
Simontookadeepbreathandslowlyblewitbackout,tryingtogethisbodytorelaxandtellinghimselfthathemustbeinsanetotakeexactlythesameposition,nightafternight,forsomewomanwhohehadneverofficiallymet.Butherehewas…again,hisbacktothecuriousdoorman,leeringoutthewindowlikeanunbalancedstalker,waitingtogetaglimpseofKaraFoster.Somethingaboutthewomanbroughtoutstrange,territorial,andprotectiveinstinctsthatkepthimhere,keepingwatch,waitingforhertowalkbyhiscondobuildingonherwayhomefromwork.
Andthen,whenhespottedher,he’ddothesamethinghealwaysdid.He’dfollowheratadistance,tryingnottoalarmher,andwaituntilshehadletherselfintoherapartmentsafelybeforeheturnedaroundandwalkedbackhome.
Hewouldn’ttalktoher,orevengetclosetoher.Heneverdid.Itwasn’tthathedidn’twantto,butKarawasgoingtonursingschoolandworkingfull-timeathismother’srestaurant.Accordingtohismom,Karaadamantlyrefusedtodatebecauseshedidn’thavethetimeorenergytoputintoarelationship.Shewasprobablyrightaboutthat.Theinsanewomandidn’tsleepenough,eatenough.Shehadnoonewhoevenworriedaboutherexceptforhismother…andSimon.Hell,inthelastyear,SimonhadprobablycaredmoreaboutKara’swell-beingthanadozenfamilymemberswouldhave,andhecouldn’tevencallherafriend.Problemwas…hewasn’tafamilymember,andhisfeelingswerefarfrombrotherly.
God,shewassweet!
SimonhadtobitebackagroanoffrustrationashethoughtaboutthefirsttimehehadseenKara,herblueeyesflashingwithhumor,blacktendrilsofsilkyhairescapingfromherever-presentponytailandherlithebodymovinggracefullyfromtabletotableathismom’srestaurant.Attheageoftwenty-eight,shestillretainedalookofinnocenceandvulnerabilitythathadSimoncaughtinherunintentionalweb.He’dbeenaprisonerthereeversince.
HismotherspokeaboutKaraasifshewereherdaughter,andSimonknewthatKaraandhismotherhadaspecialbond:onenotformedbyblood,butbyaspecialfriendship.Shit…ifKarawereyounger,Simonwasprettysurehismotherwouldadopther.Lipstwitchingslightly,SimonhopedhismotherneverexpectedhimtobelikeabrothertoKara.Itwasn’thappening.Hiscockstoodatattention,rock-hardandready,everytimehesawher.Whatinthehellwasitaboutthisparticularwomanthatmadehimsoedgyandrestless?
Simonhadfuckedwomenwhoweremoreattractiveormoresophisticated,andnotasingleoneofthemhadevertouchedanyofhisemotions.Hewasaloner,preferringtospendhistimewithhiscomputerratherthanattendingsocialfunctions,butthereweretimeswhenheneededawoman’scompanyforphysicalrelief.Occasionallytakinghimselfinhandjustwasn’tgettingitdone.Simonhadcertainfemaleacquaintancesforthoseoccasions,womenwhogavehimthecontrolheneededandhadtohaveinthebedroom,withoutalotofdemandsorquestions.Damnit!Thathadbeenenoughforhim…untilhehadseenKara.
Grimacing,hiseyesneverleavingthestreet,Simonshovedhishandsdeeperintohispocketsandadjustedhisposition,givinghisshoulderabreakbyrestinghishipagainstthewall.God,hewasgettingpathetic.Howlongwouldhemoonoverawomanwhohadneverevenacknowledgedhim?Untilshefinishednursingschoolandmovedaway?Untilshegotmarried?
HenearlygrowledatthethoughtofanothermanputtinghishandsonKara’sdelectablebody.Simonfoughtapurelyferalinstinctthatroseupatthethoughtofanothermantouchinghiswoman
She’snotyourwoman,asshole.Getagrip.
Foronceinhislife,SimonwishedheweremorelikehisolderbrotherSam,theotherhalfoftheHudsonCorporation.SamwouldhavenoproblemputtingthemovesonKara.Charm,conquer,anddiscardhadalwaysbeenhisbrother’sstyleandSamwouldn’thavegivenathoughttothepossibilityofrejection.ProbablybecauseSamneverfailed!Hisonlysiblingwentthroughthefemalepopulationlikeapersonwithanastycoldwentthroughtissues.SamwouldhavebrokendownKara’sdefenses,charmedheroutofherpantiesandthendiscardedherforhisnextconquest.
Oh,hellno.Simonlovedhisbrother,buthe’dbedamnedifhe’deverletSamseduceKara.Hedidn’tevenwantthetwooftheminthesameroomtogether.
Becauseshe’smine.
Simonshookhishead,surprisedathisownbehavior.Yeah…helikedcontrol,actuallyneededcontrol,buthehadneverwantedonewomaninparticular.Now,hecouldthinkoflittleelsebuttheprettywaitresswhohadsnaggedhisattentionayearago.
You’reafraidofher.
Simonscowledatthethought.Likehellhewas!Hewasn’tafraidofanything,andhedefinitelydidn’tfearKaraFoster.Shejust…wasnotalikelylover.Whybother?
Hefucked.
Hedidn’tdate.
Andhelikeditthatway.
HisbrotherSamwasthefaceofthecompany,themarketer.Simonwasacomputergeek,happytostayinthebackground.Whatdidheknowaboutseducingawoman?He’dneverneededtocoerceawomantohisbed.Thefemaleshefuckedwereonlywithhimforpersonalgain.Hewasknownasagenerouslover.Hewasn’tfoolenoughtobelievetheyhadanypersonalfeelingsforhim.That,heunderstood.That,hecouldhandle.
MaybeIneedtofindawaytofuckherandgetoverthiscrazyobsession
Woulditbeenough?Couldheactuallygetfreefromhisfixationwiththiswomanifhecouldfindawaytohaveher?
Christ!Hehadtodosomething.HisirrationalpreoccupationwithKarahadgrownworseandworseoverthelastyear,causinghimtowantnootherwomanexcepther.Hehadn’tgottenoffwithanyoneexcepthimselfinwelloverayear,andhereallyneededtoscratchthatitch.Yet…hecouldn’t.Ifhetriedtotakeaction,tomakeamovetocallanotherwoman,hewouldseeKara’sprettygirl-next-doorfaceandhangupthephone.
I’mjustthatfuckingobsessedwithher.
Simonglancedatanapproachingfigure,hismindalmostimmediatelystartingtodismissthedark-hairedwomanwhowasdressedinashort,black,leathermini-skirtandabrightredsweater.He’dneverseenKaradressedinanythingotherthanjeansandat-shirtthatsportedtherestaurant’slogo,standardcasualdressforemployeesofhismom’srestaurant.
Hedidasurpriseddouble-takeasthewomangotcloser,gapingwhenherfacecameintoview.HolyChrist!ItwasKara.Shewascloseenoughthathecouldseeherfeatures,thesamefacethathauntedhiswetdreamseverydamnnight,buttheoutfit….
Whatinhellisshewearing?
Simoncouldseealmosteveryinchofherlong,slender,shapelylegsintheultra-shortminiandthewholeoutfitmoldedoverherbreasts,torso,andasslikeaglove.Hiscockwasinstantlystandingatfullattentionandhepulledhishandsoutofhispockets.Theycurledintotightfistsasabeadofsweatrolleddownhisface.Followedbyanother.Andanother.
Goddamnit!Whatwasshethinking?Dressedthatway,shewaspracticallybeggingforsomemantocomeandsnatchherupoffthestreet.
And,byGod,hewasgoingtobethatman.Hewasn’tleavingthatopportunitytoanothermale,someonewhomightdoherharm.
Didn’tsherealizethatthiswasTampa?Amajorcity!Itwasn’tsometinytownwhereshecouldwalkthestreetsatnightandnotbenoticedoraccosted
Simonunclenchedonefistandgrippedthewindowframeforsupport,hiseyesneverleavingtheapproachingfemale.Grittinghisteeth,Simonknewthattodaywasthedayhewasgoingtohavetogetclosetoher,closerthanhe’deverbeenbefore.Hecouldn’thandletheseanimalisticandrampantemotionsanymore.Hedidn’tlikethem,wasn’tusedtothem.Allhewantedwashissanityback,toreturntohiscomputerandworkonhispassionfordevelopingcomputergameswithouteroticthoughtsofKaratakingoverhisbrain.
Sense.Reason.Control.Thatwashowhefunctionedandwhatheneededinordertobehimselfagain,anddammit,he’dgetbacktohisnormalstateofmind,nomatterwhatdrasticmeasureshehadtotaketoachieveit.Somehow,hewouldpurgehimselfofthisincrediblystupidandragingdesireforKaraFoster
Hismindmadeup,Simonpushedoffthewindowframeandstoodupstraight,loweringhis“mask”untilhisfacewasdevoidofemotion.Hewasgoodatthat.He’dbeenraisedinanareaofLosAngeleswheremostnormalpeoplewouldneverevenenter,aplacewherebeingweak,slow-witted,orfragileinanywaymeantbeingdestroyed.
Ifnothingelse,SimonHudsonwasasurvivor.Hisguisefirmlyinplace,herippedhisgazefromthewindow,turnedsharplyandstrodepurposefullytowardthedoor.
KaraFosterwashavingaseriouslybadday!
Sheheftedherbackpacktomakeitsitmoresolidlyonhershoulderandreachedforthehemofherridiculouslyshortskirt,yankingitdownhardtocoverherass.Theclotheslookedgreatonherclassmate,Lisa,whowasseveralinchesshorterandsevenyearsyoungerthanKara.Unfortunately,theydidn’tlookquitethesameonKara’staller,fullerbody.Thesweaterhuggedhergenerousbreastsandtheskirtwastoodamnshort,barelyconcealingthecheeksofherass.
Shewasastreet-smartwoman,havinggrownupinoneoftheworstareasofTampaandcomingthroughtheexperienceintact.Karaknewhowtoprotectherself,howtoavoidanyunwantedattention.Sowhatinthehellwasshedoinginanoutfitthatwasboundtogetherintrouble?Stupid,Kara.Really,reallystupid
Frowning,Karaforcedherselftokeepwalking.Nobigdeal.Shewasinadecentarea.Sowhatifshelookedlikeasexkitteninsneakers?Eightmoreblocksandshewouldbehome,freetofinallystripofftheludicrousoutfitandputonherowncomfortablejeansandt-shirt.
Karaheavedasighasshefocusedsolelyonarrivingatthetinyapartmentthatshesharedwithanotherstudent.Herlegswerecoldandsheshivered,walkingfastertogetherbodywarm.ItwasJanuaryinTampa,andwhilethedaytimehourswerepleasant,itgotchillyatnight.Sheshouldhavebroughtherjacket,butshehadbeenrunninglatethismorning.
Shehadn’tplannedtohaveherlegsbareandherbehindflappinginthebreeze.
Thedayisalmostover.
ThankGod!
Shehadspilledcoffeeonherownjeansandt-shirtearlierintheday.Withnotimetogohomeandchangebeforeshehadtogettowork,KarahadgratefullyacceptedtheofferofcleanclothesfromLisa,aclassmatewhowasneverwithoutachangeofclothinginhercar.Itwasn’tthatKaradidn’tappreciatethekindnessofherclassmate.Shedefinitelydid.KarajustwishedshecouldweartheclothingwiththesameattitudeasLisa.But…shecouldn’t.Shewasusedtokeepingalowprofile,andshewasmortifiedthatsheprobablyresembledacallgirlwithbadshoes,functioningtheentiredayandeveningwithahintofredonhercheeksandtryingdesperatelynottobendover.
Whenshehadarrivedattherestaurantforhershift,herkindboss,HelenHudson,hadtakenpityonherandduginthedrawersforanapronthatreachedKara’skneesandcoveredherexposedbackside.
Wishingshehadworntheapronhome,shejerkedagainatthebottomofthesnugskirtwithmorethanahintoffrustration,hopingshewasn’tflashinganythingmorethansomebarethigh.
ExhaustiontuggedatKara’sbodyandherstomachrumbled.Shehadgottensobusyatworkthatshehadn’ttakenthetimetoeat.Thesmall,cozyrestauranthadbeenbusy,muchbusierthanusualbecauseitwasFridaynight.Shehadactuallybeengratefulforthecustomers.Thetipmoneyshehadinherbackpackwasallthatstoodbetweenherandacompletelyemptybankaccount.Maybeshecouldbuyafewgroceriesnowthatshehadafewbucksfromtips.HercupboardsathomewerebareandherroommateseemedtobeinevenworsefinancialshapethanKara.LydianeverboughtfoodandwhateverKaraboughtdisappearedquickly.
Lastsemester!Youcanmakeit.
Damn…ithadbeenalongfouryears,andKarafeltmucholderthanheractualageoftwenty-eightyears.Actually,shejustfeltold.Period!Mostofherclassmateswerebarelylegaldrinkingageandwereallaboutcollegepartying,whileKaracouldonlythinkaboutmakingitthrougheachday,gettingonestepclosertograduation.
Karahadlostherparentsinanautoaccidentattheageofeighteenandwasprettymuchalone.Afterworkingforseveralyearsasawaitress,barelysurviving,sheknewshehadtoeithergotocollegeorresignherselftostrugglingthroughlifewithnoendtopovertyinsight.
Shedidn’tregretthedecisiontogotocollege,butithadbeendifficult,anarduousandlonelyroadthatshecouldonlybegratefulwasalmostover.
You’llmakeit.Almostthere!
Karastoppedabruptlyasthesidewalkstartedtotiltandhervisionblurred.Oh,shit.Herhandreachedouttogripthepostofastreetlighttosteadyherselfasherbrainwhirledandherbodytrembled.Dizzinessmadeitimpossibletofunction,toadvanceanyfarther.Damnit.Ishouldhavetakenthetimetoeat
“Kara!”Sheheardthelow,no-nonsensebaritonefilterthroughtoherfoggybrain.Thevoicewasabrupt,butitwasreassuringtoknowthatsomeonewhoknewher,whorecognizedher,washere.
Shakingherhead,tryingtoclearhervision,Karatightenedhergriponthemetalpostandwilledherselfnottopassoutonthecoldstonepavementasherbodyswayedprecariously,preparingitselfforthefall.
“Christ,youlooklikehell!”Thesamevoice,impatientandhusky,brokethroughherhazymind,andshefeltapairofsolid,musculararmscomearoundherasshewasliftedagainstasolid,rock-hardchest.
Warm…sowarm.Instinctively,shesnuggledintotheheatofthesturdy,heat-producingform,tryingtousethebodyheattounlockherchilledmuscles.
Sherestedherspinningheadagainstaverybroad,verysolidshoulderandsighedasthemysterymanpassedthroughasetofdoorsandintoawarmbuilding.Somewhereinsidehermind,sheknewsheshouldbefightinghim,tryingtobreakawayfromthestrangemanwhosevoiceshedidn’trecognize,butshedidn’thavethestrength.
Karaacknowledgedthepingofanelevatorbellandherstomachrebelledasthesteelchamberlurched,movingupwardatwhatseemedlikealightning-fast,head-spinningspeed.
Momentslater,shewasgentlyloweredtoacomfortablebedandcoveredinawarmcomforterthateasedthechillfromherbody.Hershoeswereremovedroughlyanddroppedtothefloor.Sheopenedhereyesandtriedtofocus.Strugglingtositup,shefoundherselfpushedbackdownontothepillowsbystronghandsonhershoulders.“Don’tmove.Notoneinch.”
“I’mfine.I’vehadalittlebug.IthoughtIwasoverit.Itwasjustalittledizziness,”shearguedasshetriedtositupagain.
“You’renotfine,”thevoicebarked.“Thedoctorisheretoseeyou.Helivesinthebuilding.Hesawyounearlytakeanosediveintothepavement.”
“Doctor?”Alarmed,Karafocusedonanothermanwholurkedbehindthebossyone.“Idon’tneedadoctor.”Shecouldn’taffordadoctor.
“Toolate.He’shere.Andyouarebeingchecked.”
“Icanrefuse,”sheansweredhesitantly,hergazefinallymeetingthedarkeyesofherrescuer.
“Youwon’t,”hetoldherinawarningvoice.
Hisperilousappearancekeptasharpretortfromexitinghermouth.God,hewashuge.Broadshouldersfilledhervisionashecrouchedbesidethebed.Shehadfelthismuscularbodywhilehewascarryingher,butnowshecouldvisuallyappreciatethestrengthofthosearmsandhissolidbulkashersightclearedandthedizzinessbegantosubside
Big.Dark.Dangerous.Kara’sblueeyesclashedwithhisdarkbrownstare,hislooksoferociousthatitwasalmostfrightening.Heranhishandimpatientlythroughhisshortblackhair,hisexpressiongrim.Hewasn’thandsomeinanyconventionalway,hisfeaturestoosharpandhisolivecomplexionmarredbyasmallscartohisrighttempleandanotheronhisleftcheek.Butdamn…hewasappealinginacarnal,sensualsortofway.Karacouldfeeltheintensityvibratingfromhisbodyandenteringhers,makinghernippleshardandsensitive.“Whoareyou?”sheaskedhimsoftly,rememberingthathehadcalledherbyname.
“SimonHudson.HelenHudson’sson.”Hestoodandbackeduptolettheoldermanbehindhimstepforward.
Helen’sson?Simon.ShehadnevermetSamorSimon,butshehadheardallaboutthemfromherboss,awomanwhohadbecomeaveryclosefriendovertheyears.Simonwastheyoungest.Inhisearlythirties.Acomputergenius,hedevelopedcomputergamesthathadstartedtheHudsonCorporationonitswaytobecomingacompanyworthbillions.
“Younglady,Iheardyou’vebeensick.I’mDr.Simms.Letmetakeaquicklookatyou.”Akind,middle-agedfacereplacedMr.Tall,DarkandUnhappy.Karaletoutarelievedbreathandgavethejovialdoctorasmallsmile.
“I’mfine.Avirus.MaybeIwasn’tquiteoveritandit’sbeenalongday.Justalittleresidualfatigue,”sheassuredthephysician,wantingtoputonherwell-wornsneakersandrunawayfromthishumblingsituationassoonaspossible.
Simonstoodbehindthegooddoctor,hisarmscrossedandhisfaceformidable.Geez…themanwasfierce.Itwasn’tthatshehadn’tseenplentyofscarymeninherlife,buttherewassomethingaboutSimonthathadherheartthumpingandherbodyonhighalert.
Karaletthedoctordohisexam.Dr.Simmswaskindandefficientwithabedsidemannerthathadhersmilingashechattedabsentlyduringhisevaluation.Hegavehercommandsandaskedthestandardquestions.Sheansweredhisquestionsasbrieflyaspossible,wantingtogettheexamfinishedandgetoutofSimonHudson’sconstrainedpresence.
Dr.Simmsstoodwithacongenialsmileashecompletedhisexam.“Youneedrest,food,andmoretimetogetoverthisvirus.Youmighthavebeenfeelingslightlybetterforadaybecauseyourfeverbroke,butthefeverisbackandthevirusisn’tcompletelythroughyoursystem.You’realreadyrundownanditdoesn’tsoundlikeyousleeporeatproperly.”Thedoctor’ssmilebroadened.“Typicalofusmedicalfolks.Itmayhavebeenawhileago,butIstillremembermedicalschool.”Afterapause,thedoctoraskedprofessionally,“Anychanceyoucouldbepregnant?”
Kara’seyesshottoSimon’sface,hercheeksburningwithembarrassment.DidSimonreallyneedtobehearingallofthis?Hiseyeslockedwithhersandhisbodyseemedvisiblytenseashewaitedforheranswer.
“No.Absolutelynopossibility,”sheansweredwithatimiditythatwasusuallynotpartofherpersonality.Therewasn’tachanceinhellthatshewaspregnant,unlessavibratorcouldknockherup,andlately,shewaseventootiredtousethat.Hersexdrivewasdeadfromeighty-hourweeksofworkandschool.TheonlyactionherbedgotwasKara,alone,sleepingforthefewhoursofrestthatshegoteverynightafterherlate-nightstudysessions.
Thedoctorbreezedoverthesubject,instructinghertorestandtreatthesymptomswithover-the-counterfevermedications.
KarathankedhimandgavehimatremuloussmilebeforeheturnedtoSimon,thetwomentalkingquietlyastheyleftthebedroom.
Shesatupquickly,tooquickly,andtheroomrotatedforaminutebeforeherheadcleared.God,shewasasweakasakittenfromthereturnofthefeverandlackoffood.Shebentslowlyandsnatchedhershoesfromthefloor,sittingonthebedtocramherfeetintothemwithoutevenuntyingthelaces.
“Whatinthehelldoyouthinkyou’redoing?”Karajerkedupatthesoundoftheboomingvoice,herfootonlyhalfwayintohersecondshoe.
“Ineedtogethome,”sheanswered,uncomfortablenowthatshewasalonewithSimon.Hewastoobig,toogruff,toodemanding,toomuchofeverything.Therewassomethingabouthimthatmadeherfeeloff-balance,andithadnothingtodowithhervirus.
Heswungherlegsbackontothebedandpulledhershoesoff.Damn.Allofthathardworkgoneinseconds.Puttingonthoseshoeshadbeenaneffortandshedidn’tappreciatehavingtodoitagain.
“You’resickandyou’restayinghere,”Simontoldhersternlyashisdarkeyessweptoverherandhegrimaced
“Ican’t.I’mworkingtomorrow.Ineedtogetsomesleep.”
“You’renotworkingforatleastthenextweek.IalreadycalledMomandtoldhertoreplaceyou.”Hisexpressionwasdisapprovingashecoveredherbodywiththecomforterandsatontopofit,effectivelytrappingher.“Ialsotookthelibertyofgrabbingyourkeysfromyourbackpacksothatmyassistantcangotoyourplaceandgetyousomeclothesincaseyourroommateisn’thome.”
“ButI-”
“Don’targue!Thisdiscussionisover.I’mgoingtomakeyousomethingtoeatandyouwilleatit.Thenyou’llgotosleep.”Hestoodandexited,theordersstillreverberatingthroughtheratherimpressivespaceofthebedroom.
Fuming,Karasatupanddebatedwhethershedaredtospringoutofbedandthroughthedoorofwhatlookedlikeacondo.Averynicecondo!Thebedroomwasspaciousanddecoratedinshadesoftanandblack.Tan,plushcarpetandmasculinedarkfurnituredominatedtheroom.Thebedwasenormousandsatonaframeofintricateblackironworkthatsupportedacanopyofwhatlookedtobetansilkwithwovenblackandbrowndesigns.Itwasabeautifulroom,boldanddark,justlikethemanwhoownedit.
Didhereallyexpecthertostayhere?Yes,hismotherwasherbossandfriend,butshedidn’tknowSimonandshewasn’tsureshelikedhim.Hewasbossy,impatient,andexpectedpeopletojumpwhenhesaidjump.Orstaywhenhesaidstay-sortoflikeawell-traineddog.Unfortunatelyforhim,Karadidn’ttakeorderswell.Shehadmadeherowndecisionssinceherparentshadpassedawayandthelastthingsheneededwasadomineeringbillionairecallingtheshotsinherlife.TheonlythingmoneymeanttoKarawassecurity.Otherthanthat,shecouldn’tcarelessaboutwhatmoneycouldbuy;itwashardtomissmaterialthingsthatshehadneverhad
HecalledHelentoreplaceme?Therewasnowayshecouldmissaweekofwork.Missingtwodaysthisweekhadalreadystretchedheremptybankaccount.Shereliedonhertipstosurvive,andshedidn’tgettipsbysittingonherbuttathome.Shehadmissedtwoeveningsbecauseshehadnochoice.Thevirushadeatenherupandspitherout,leavingherprostrateonherbedandsickerthanshehadbeensinceshewasachild.
Shesighedandleanedbackagainstthepillows.Shewassotiredandsodamnedweakrightnow.Allshereallywantedtodowasburyherselfinthiswarm,comfortablebedandsleepuntilshewasn’ttiredanymore.Whatwouldthatbelike?Shecouldn’trememberatimethatshewasn’texhausted.Ithadbecomenormalforhertofeeldrainedduringthelastfouryears;sheonlysleptafewhoursanightandhermealsweresporadic,dependingonwhatshecouldafford.
Karalookedupassheheardtheclinkofglass-on-glassandsawSimoncomingintotheroom,jugglingdishes.Shebitbackasmile,thinkingthatitwasagoodthingthathewasacomputergeek,becausehewouldnevermakeitasawaiter.Hehadaglassinonehandandaplateintheother.Abowlwasbalancedprecariouslybetweenhiselbowandchest.Shewantedtotellhimitwouldbeeasierifhejustputthebowlontheplate,butshebitbackthesuggestion.
“Idon’tknowwhatyoulike,”hegrumbledasheputtheglassonthebedsidetableandhandedherthebowl.Hesoundedcantankerousoverthefactthattherewassomethinghedidn’tknow.“Soup.Eat.”
Talkaboutamanoffewwords.Heissuedcommandslikeadrillsergeant.“Simon,Ican’tstayhere,”shetoldhimsoftlyassheacceptedthebowlofsteamingsoup.Chickennoodle.Herfavorite.Stomachrumblingfromthetemptingaromacomingfromthebowl,sheliftedthespoonandtookacautiousbite.Shecouldtellthatithadcomeoutofacan,butittasteddeliciousandherrumblingstomachmadehershovelitinlikeastarvingwoman.
“Youarestaying.Takethese.”Hescowledatherasheheldupahandanddroppedtwopillsintoheropenpalm.
Extra-StrengthTylenol.Shepoppedthemintohermouthgratefullyandreachedfortheglass.Simonhandedittoherbeforeshecouldreachit.SheswallowedandhandedthejuicebacktoSimon’swaitinghandbeforereplying,“Ihavetowork.Ican’taffordtobeoff.IalreadytooktwodaysbecauseIwassick.I’msureI’llfeelbetterbytomorrow.”
“Youbetyoursweet,exposedassyouwill.I’llmakesurethatyoudo,”hereplied,hisvoiceirascible.
Karacontinuedtoeathersoupassheeyedhisexpression.Hewasserious.Deadserious.HowdidasweetwomanlikeHelenendupwithacrabby-asssonlikeSimon?“You’renotmyboss,Simon.”
“No,butmymotherisandsheagreesthatyouaren’tworking.Shedidn’trealizeyouwerestillill,”hetoldher,hisexpressionsurly.“Hell…Idon’tknowhowshemissedit.Youhaveblackcirclesunderyoureyesthatmakeyoulooklikearaccoonandyoulookdeadonyourfeet.Mom’sdefinitelyslipping.Shecanusuallydigoutanyproblem.Painfully,ifnecessary,”herumbled,asthoughhewererememberingafewofthosepainfulexperiences.
“Iwasfeelingbetterearlier.Andshewastryingtohelpmefindsomethingtowearovermyskirt,”shetoldhimcalmlyasshefinishedoffthesoup.
“Whereinthehelldidyougetthatoutfit?I’veneverseenyouinanythingbutjeans,”hequeriedsoftly,dangerously.Karaquiveredashiseyesroamedoverthequilt,asthoughhecouldseeherscantily-cladbodythroughthematerial.
“Itwasaloan,”shesaid,acceptingtheplatethatheldayummy-lookingsandwichashetookawaythebowl.“Likeacompleteidiot,Ispilledcoffeedownthefrontofmyclothestodayanddidn’thavetimetorunhomebeforework.”
“Youarenotanidiot,”hestatedcurtly.
Swallowingabiteofthedeliciouseggsaladsandwich,Kara’seyesjerkeduptohisfaceinsurprise.“We’venevermet.Howdidyourecognizeme?HowdoyouknowwhatIusuallywear?”
Heshruggedanddivertedhiseyes.“I’veseenyouaroundtherestaurant.”
“I’veneverseenyouattherestaurant.”
“IstopbytoseeMom.Iusuallydon’tgooutfront.”
Helen’sofficewasintheback,soitmadesense.Karawassilentwhileshewolfeddowntherestofthesandwich.God…shewashungry…andgratefulforthemeal.
“Thankyou,”shetoldhimsincerelyasshehandedtheplatebacktohimandhesetitonthebedsidetable.
“Youneedtoeat.Andsleep.”Hetouchedthedarkpatchesunderhereyessoftlywithhisindexfinger.“I’veneverbeencloseenoughtoseehowtiredyoulook.”
“Theviruskickedmyrear,”shemurmuredlightly,feelingwarmednotonlybythefood,butbytheconcernedfrownonSimon’sface.“I’llfeelwellenoughtoworktomorrow.”
Hehandedhertheglassofjuice.“Don’teventhinkaboutit.Finishthatandsleep.”
Tootiredtoargue,Karadownedthejuiceandgaveuptheglasstohiswaitinghand.She’ddealwitheverythinglater.Hereyesweredroopingandexhaustionpressedonherbodylikeweights.Sheneededtoclosehereyes.
Snugglingunderthequilt,Karasighedandrestedherheadonthepillow.Forthefirsttimeinyears,shefeltfull,comfortableand…safe.Simonmightbecranky,buthehadapparentlyappointedhimselfherprotector.Itwassomehow…comforting.
Withthatstrangethoughtrollingaroundinhermind,sheslept.Karawokelatethenextday,feelingcompletelyrestedandwonderingwhereinthehellshewasuntilsherememberedtheepisodeonthesidewalkandhersubsequentrescuebySimonHudson.
Washehere,orhadheleftfortheday?
Slippingsilentlyoutofthemassivebed,Karapoppedherheadoutofthebedroomdoor,hearingnothingbutsilence.ScoopingupablacksilkrobethatprobablybelongedtoSimon,shepulledopenadoorattheotherendofthebedroom,relievedtofindthemasterbathroom.Shelockedthedoorandstrippedquickly,pullingherhaircompletelyfreeofitsconfiningclip,andlettingherclotheslieinapuddleatherfeet.
Sheneededashower.Andcoffee!
Feelingmorelikeherselfafterfinishingintheshower,cleanandwrappedinSimon’srobe,shehesitatedasshelookedlonginglyatatoothbrushandtoothpasteonthemarblecounternexttothedualsinks.Notwantingtointrude,butdesperateforatoothbrush,Karaopenedafewofthecupboardsandalmostgiggledwithhappinessasshefoundabrand-newtoothbrushstillwrappedinplastic.SheputittogooduseandtriedtotameherwethairwithoneofSimon’shairbrushes.Belatedly,shehopedhewouldn’tmind.Makeyourselfrightathome,Kara.
Likeshewouldeverownaplacelikethisone?Thesheerdecadenceallaroundhernearlyblewherawayandshestaredatthelargegardenbathtubwithaheavysigh.Whatshewouldn’tgiveforanhourorsointhattub.
Shewasn’tamaterialgirl,butstill,shecouldappreciateaphenomenalbathtub.Herapartmentonlyhadatinyshowerandagood,longsoakwassomethingthatwouldhavetowaituntilshegraduatedfromschoolandcouldgetherownplace.Anditwillhaveabathtub.Shedecidedrightthenandtherethatshewouldmakeitarequirement.
Turningawayfromthetemptationofthehugeovaltub,Karatightenedtherobearoundherandpickedupherclothesandtowel,tryingnottopictureSimon’smuscular,nakedbodyreclininginthewater.
Stupidwoman!Stopthinkingaboutyourboss’ssonandfindyourdamnbackpacksoyoucangetthehellawayfromhere.
Exitingthebedroom,shehesitated,notsureexactlywheretogo.Thecondowashuge.Thereweresparebedrooms,tastefullydecorated,attheotherendofthelonghallwaythatledtothemasterbedroom.Shealmostgaspedasshesteppedoutofthecorridorandintoaspaciouslivingroomwithcathedralceilingsandbeautiful,tanleatherfurniture.
Holycrap!Hadsheeverseenatelevisionthatbig?Thescreendominatedonewall,makingitlookalmostlikeamovietheaterscreen.
Isoooodon’tbelonghere!
Herbarefeetlefttheplushcarpetandlandedonsmoothtileasshewalkedslowlyintoakitchenthatwouldbeanychef’sdream.Decoratedinforestgreenandcream,ithadeveryconvenienceapersoncouldeverwantandseveralthatshecouldn’tevenidentify.
Karaspiedherbackpackontheislandtableandunzippedittostufftheborrowedclothinginthelargecenterpocket,stillclutchingthewettowelbecauseshewasn’tquitecertainwhattodowithit.
“Howareyoufeeling?”Shejumpedasthelow,inquiringvoicespokeinthesoundlesskitchen.ShecoveredherchestwithashakyhandasherheartacceleratedandsheturnedtoSimon,whowaswatchinghersilently,onearmproppedcasuallyagainstthedoorframe.Hisdarkhairwaswet,asifhehadjustshowered,andhehadonapairofjeansthathuggedhismuscularlowerbodylovingly.Agreenfleecepullovershirtstretchedtoaccommodatehismassiveshouldersandbroadchest.Themanwasseriously…ripped.
Hisliquidbrowneyesrakedoverherbody,growingwarmerwitheachpass.Upanddown.Upanddown.Karapulledtherobetighter.“I’msorry.Ididn’thaveanythingelsetowear.”
Heshruggedashepushedawayfromthedoor.“Itlooksahellofalotbetteronyouthaniteverdidonme,”heansweredinahuskyvoiceashesaunteredovertothefarcupboard.“Coffee?”
Oh,hellyes.Hemightaswellhaveaskedherifshewantedtofinishnursingschool.Shewasacompleteaddict.“Yes,please.Ifyoudon’tmind.”
“Sit.You’resupposedtoberesting.”Hemotionedtowardtheislandandshesatononeofthehighstools.
Shewatchedashepoppedacupintothecoffeemaker,droppedacoffeeintoaslotandclosedit.Themachinesputteredandcametolife.Hercoffeewasdonewithinseconds.
“Everycoffeelover’sdream,”shesighedashesetthesteamingcupinfrontofher.
“Ihopeyoulikeitbold,”hecommentedashepulledcreamerfromtherefrigeratorandplacedthesugarbowlandthecreaminfrontofher.“It’sastrongerblend.”
Karabreathedinthedeliciousaromacomingfromthesteamingcupandhermouthwatered.“Itsmellsfabulous.”Heheldoutaspoonandshetookit,theirfingersbrushingasshegraspedtheutensil.Herhandtingledfromthelighttouchandwarmthspreadthroughherbody.Hewasstandingclose,soclosethatshecouldbreatheinhisclean,masculinescentashishandreachedtowardhersilk-coveredlegs.Herbreathcaughtashisfingersbrushedagainstthesilk,sendingheatstraighttohercore.
“I’lltakethis.”Heliftedthewettowelfromherlap,hisknucklesslidingslowlyalongherthighsasherelievedherofthewetlinenshehadbeenholding.
Shewastrembling.Actuallyshivering,justfromhislight,casualtouch.DearGod,sheneededtomoveaway.Somewhereshecouldn’tsmellhim,couldn’tfeelhisheatandunsettlingvibrationsofsexualenergy.“Thankyou.”Hervoicewasweakassheletgoofthetowel.
Shebreathedasighofreliefashestrolledintoasideroomoffthekitchenandreturnedwithoutthetowel.“Youdidn’tanswermyquestion.Howareyoufeeling?”
Shedivertedhereyesfromhistemptingbodyanddumpedcreamandsugarintohercoffee.“Ifeelgreat.Fever’sgone.Thankyouforhelpingme,butIneedtogetmoving.”Hereyesclosedandshenearlymoanedastherichtasteofpremiumcoffeehitherpalate.
“Youcan’tleave.Nottoday.Nottomorrow.”Simon’svoicewasneutralashemovedtothecoffeemakerandslammedanothercoffeeintothemachine,loweringthelidwithmoreforcethannecessary.
“Why?”Hereyespoppedopentogivehimasurprisedlook.
Hiseyesgluedtohissteamingmugofcoffee,hesatacrossfromheronanotherstool,liftedthespoonfromthetableandaddedasmallamountofcreamtohiscoffee.“You’vebeenevicted.”
Coffeesloshedoverherfingersasshejoltedinshock,hereyesflyingtohisface,momentarilystunned.“That’snotpossible.Lydiapaystherent.Shegetsmyshareeverymonth.”Shereachedautomaticallyforanapkininthecenteroftheislandtocleanherfingers,thepainofthesuperficialburnnotevenregisteringbecauseshewastooshockedbyhisstatement.Wasitajoke?Washissenseofhumorcompletelytwisted?Didn’theknowthatitwasn’tnicetoteaseanear-destitutewomanoverthatsortofthing?
Hefinallymethergaze,hiseyesgrimandholdingatouchofsympathy.“I’mafraidyourroommatehasfled.Allthatwasintheapartmentlatelastnightwasafewboxesthatcontainedsomeofyourschooldocuments,birthcertificate,andotherpaperitems.”
Kara’shandsstartedtoshakeandshetwistedthemtogetheronthemarblecounter.Itcouldn’tbetrue.Itwasn’ttrue.“Therehastobesomemistake.”
“It’snomistake.Myassistantcheckedwiththelandlordearlythismorning.Yourroommatewasevicted,hasbeengoingthroughtheevictionprocessforsometime.Yesterdaywasthelastday.”Simontookasipofhiscoffee,hiseyesneverleavinghers.
OhmyGod,ohmyGod,ohmyGod!Kara’smindracedasshetookintheimplicationsofhisrevelation.Noplacetolive.Nopossessions.Whatthehell?
“Therehastobesomemistake,”shewhispered,hergazelandingonthecoffeemug.Pleaseletitbeamistake.Therewasnowayshecouldcatchuptherentorreplaceherpossessions.“Whataboutmythings,myclothes?”
“Yourroommatewasthorough.Therewasnothingthereexceptafewboxes.”
“Ithadtobethewrongplace.”
“It’stherightplace,Kara.I’msorry.”
Simonrattledofftheaddressandthenameofherlandlordandroommate.“Everythingcorrect?”
Tearsfilledherblueeyesasshenodded,unabletospeakpasttheknotinherthroat.DearGod…shehadbeenbalancingonatightropeforyears,withoutanet,andnowshewasplungingtoherdeathjustasshenearedtheendoftherope.
SherarelycommunicatedwithLydia,butsheneverthoughtherroommatewascapableofsomethinglikethis.Theywerecordialtoeachother,butKarawasonlyhomeatnighttostudyandsleep,makingherencounterswithLydiasporadic.Sheleftherportionoftherentandutilitiesonthetinykitchentableeverymonth,neverdoubtingthatherroommateusedittopaytheirbills.Apparently,shehadn’t.“Thisisnothappening,”shechokedout,feelingasifherwholeworldhadjustshattered.Andactually,ithad.Justafewwords-onedisaster,onebetrayal-wasallittooktobringherlifefallingdownaroundher.
“Youokay?”Simonaskedhesitantly,sippinghiscoffeeandwatchinghercautiously.
“Yes.No.Idon’tknow,”shebreathedincredulously.“Ihavetothink.”Whattodo.Wheretolive!Howtosurvive?Shepushedthecoffeecupawayandburiedherheadinherarmsinfrontofher.DearGod…shewasdestroyed.Think,Kara.Think.“Ididn’tknow.HowcouldInotknow?”sheaskedSimon,butmostlyherselfreally,asshetriedtounderstandhowthiscouldhappen.
“Yourroommatedroppedoutofschoollastsemester.Apparently,shehideverythingsothatshecouldstillcollectyourmoneyupuntilshehadtoleave,”Simonanswered,hisvoiceedgedwithanger.“I’msorry,Kara.Youhaveenoughonyourplatewithoutthishappening.”
Sheraisedherheadandherconfused,fear-filledgazemethisangryeyeswithsurprise.Hewasangry.AtLydia.Atthecircumstances.Simonobviouslydidhaveaheart.“E-everythingisgone?Thefurniture,mybedroomstuff,myotherbelongings?”shestammered,tearschokingherthroat.
“Theonlyboxesleftwerebroughtherebymyassistant,Nina.They’reonthebedintheguestroom,”hesaidgravely.“Icheckedeverythingout,Kara.Itwaslegal.Yourroommatetookeverythingontheverylastday.Ifyouhadgonehomelastnight,youwouldhavefoundanemptyapartment.I’mgladyouweresparedthatparticularlate-nightsurprise.Ninagavethekeybacktothelandlord.Thelockswereduetobechanged.Youcan’tgobackthere.”
Nohome.Nobed.Noplacetogo
Despairandlosswelledupinsideherandshesuddenlycouldn’tbreathe,couldn’tthink.Silenttearsrolledfromhereyesandallshecouldthinkaboutwasthelastfouryearsofstruggleandhardship.Fornothing.Allfornothing.She’dendupinashelter,ifshecouldfindanavailablespot.Schoolwouldhavetowaituntilshecouldgetbackonherfeet.
“No.Oh,God,no.”Shesuckedinadeepbreath,tryingtosquelchherpanic,butshecouldn’t.
Herbodyheaving,herhandsoverherface,KaraFosterdidsomethingshehadn’tdonesincethedeathofherparents.
Shewept.TheicearoundSimon’sheartcrackedjustalittleashewatchedthetotallydespondent,forlornwomaninfrontofhimbreakdownintears,herhopelesssobstwistinginhisgut.
Fuck!Ifhecouldlocateherworthlessroommate,he’dmakeherpayforeverybitofpainKarawassufferingrightnow.
Unabletostophimself,Simonwenttoherandgatheredherbodyagainsthisown,liftingherintohisarmswithcarefultugsuntilshecametoherfeetandputherarmsaroundhisneck,turningherfaceagainsthischest.Hecouldfeelherbodyquivering,hersmallerformplasteredagainsthisown,keeninghermiseryagainsthisshoulder.
“Shhh…Kara.Itwillallbeokay.I’lltakecareofyou.”Simonranahanddownhersilkyblackhair,knowingthathemeanteveryword.Itwasn’tjustsomethinghewassayingtoquiether,takeawayherpain.Hewantedtotakecareofthiswomanwhohadseenmorethanhershareofbadluckandhardship,bearingitwithadmirablestrength.Shewasspecial,andhertearsnearlyundidhim.
Hetookadeepbreathandtightenedhisarmsaroundherwaist,splayingonehandalongherslenderback,movingthehandinsoothingcirclestocalmher.Shefeltsogood,sorightinhisarms.Hiscocktwitchedashebreathedinheralluringscent.ShesmelledlikespringandKara-anatural,enticingsmellthatmadehismouthwater.
Hecursedhistwitchingcockasheheldherpliant,softbodyagainsthis.Nowwasnotthetimetogethard,buthewasn’tsurehecouldbewithinamileofKaraandnotgetaragingerection.Awarmsighlefthismouth,makingafewtendrilsofherhairflutter.
Simonwantedtomakeallofherproblemsgoaway,banishthemliketheyhadneverexisted.“We’lldealwithit,Kara.I’llhelpyou.”
Shepulledawayfromhim,swipingtearsawaywiththefingersofbothhands.“Igotyouallwet.”Shehiccuppedasshebrushedatthefrontofhisdampshirt.
Simonwantedtowhineasshepulledherselfcompletelyfromhisarms.“Itdoesn’tmatter.”
“Ican’tbawllikeababyallday.IhavetoseeifIcanfindashelter.Thishasputmeoverthefinancialedge.”Herfacewascomposednow,herexpressionlifeless.
“Noshelter.Youcanstayhere.Ihaveplentyofspace.”Hetriedtokeephisvoicecalm,buthewasreadytowrestlehertothegroundifneeded.Shewasn’tgoingtoashelter.Shemightbebrokenatthemoment,butshewouldrecover.“Thinkreasonably,Kara.Youneedhelp.I’mwillingtohelpyou.Youcanfinishyourlastsemesterandlivehere.”
“Why?Whywouldyouwantmehere?I’macompletestrangertoyou.”
Hewantedtotellherthatshehadneverbeenastranger,notsincethefirstmomenthesawher.Somethinghadclickedinsidehim,somethingraw,andsomethingelemental.“Youneedhelp.Everybodyneedshelpsometimes.Ihadmybrother.Iwaslucky.”
“Simon,Ican’tjusttakeadvantageofyou.”
Ohyeah,youcan.Anytimeyouwantto.Simonploppedbackintohischairtohidehisgrowingerection.Thankfully,shesatandpulledhercoffeecuptowardher.“Youaren’ttakingadvantage.You’rejustacceptingalittleassistance.”
Shesnortedbeforetakingasipofherlukewarmbeverage.“It’smorethanalittle.Istillhavemorethanfourmonthsofschoolleft.Nomoney.Noclothing.Nothing.”
Eventhoughhewantedtotellhertofeelfreetowalkaroundnaked,heanswered,“Ninaisgettingyousomeclothes.Noworries.”Hetookadeepbreathbeforecontinuing,“Ionlyhaveonecondition.Otherwise,myassistanceisunconditional.”
“Whatisit?”Shelookedathimcautiouslyoverhermug.
“Iwantyoutostopworkingwhileyou’reinschool.”Hehadtobitebackasmileasherfaceturnedupinastubborn,implacableexpression.Thiswasgoingtobeasoresubject,buthewasn’tgoingtolose.
“Ican’tstopworking.Ineedtolive.Ihavenothing,”shetoldhimadamantly.
“Nowork.I’llhelpyoufinancially.Youalreadydofortyhoursaweekatschoolandthatdoesn’tincludestudytime.Myoffer,takeitorleaveit.”Hewasn’tabouttowatchhercontinuetofadeaway.Afterjustonenightofdecentsleep,thedarkcirclesunderhereyeshaddecreased.Itwouldbenicetoseethemgonealtogetherandwatchhereatdecentmeals.Shemighthaveaninnercoremadeofsteel,butdamnit,herbodywasfragile.
“But,I-”
“That’sthedeal.Takeitorleaveit?”
Hewatchedherfaceturnredandhereyesclashedwithhisinadisgustedstare.Simon’sbreathcaughtsilently,andhisheartbegantorace.Itwasariskymove,butwhereelsecouldshego?Whatcouldshedo?Butforamoment,foraninstantthatfeltlikeaneternity,hewatchedherface,certainthatshewasgoingtotellhimtogoscrewhimself.
Hewasdictatingtoher,tellingherhowtorunherlife,andinstinctively,shewantedtorebel.Karaletgoofafrustratedbreath.Hisgazewasimmovableandinflexible.Nocompromise,then.Itwashiswayorthefreeway.Didshereallyhaveachoice?Shecouldlookforashelter,butitwouldmeangivingupschoolfornowandmessingupthewholeprogram.“Whataboutmyinsurance,mybenefits?Whatabouttherestaurant?”
“Mom’splacewillbefine.Shehaswaitresseswhowanttobefull-time.”
Karaflinchedashemadethestatement,knowingitwastrue.Therewereotheremployeeswhowouldbeonlytoohappytostepintoherfull-timeposition.
“AndI’llmakesurethatyoustayonCOBRA.Youwon’tloseyourinsurance.”
Shesearchedhiseyes,tryingtoreadhim,butSimonwasamysterytoher.Whywashedoingthis?Didshetrusthim?Shehardlyknewhim.ShetrustedHelen,andHelenadoredhersons.“Okay.I’lldoit.ButyouneedtokeeptrackofthefundsandI’llpayyouback.”
“Nodeal.”
“Yousaidyouonlyhadthatonecondition.”Shedrainedhercoffee,tryingtokeepherhandssteadybygraspingbothsidesofthemug.
Heshrugged.“It’sanadd-onsinceyoutriedtochangetheoriginalterms.”
“Whatareyougettingoutofallofthis?I’mgoingtodisruptyourprivacy,takeyourmoney,andyougetnothing?”Shegapedathim,baffledbythewholearrangement.
“Idon’twantyourmoney.Can’tyoujusttakethehelpwithoutquestioningmymotives?Iwanttohelp,”hebalkedinanuneasyvoice,finishingthelastofhiscoffee,slammingthecupbacktothetablewithanimpatientwhack
“Iwanttodosomething,giveyousomethingforyourtrouble.I’vealwayspaidmyownway.”Agitated,shestoodandcollectedthecups.Shetookthemtothesinkandrinsedthembeforeputtingtheminthedishwasher.Honestly,sheshouldbekissinghisfeetingratitude,butbeinginhisdebtsomehowbotheredher.Shewasn’tusedtotaking.Fromanyone!Shewasasurvivor,doingwhatsheneededtodojusttostayonestepaheadofpoverty.Thiswassoforeign,sofreakingconfusing.
KaraturnedaroundandslammedintoSimon’spowerfulbody,aforcethateasilykeptherbodyfromadvancing.Themanwaslikeconcrete,fixedandimmobile.Sheputherhandsonhissolid,muscularbicepstosteadyherself.“Sorry,”shemumbled,buthedidn’tmoveaway.
“There’sonlyonethingIwantfromyou,Kara.”Hisvoicewaslowandhuskyandhebentdownandinhaled,asthoughhewerebreathinginherscent.Heslappedahandoneachsideofthecounter,pinningher.
Themanwaslikeaseethingkettleoftestosterone,andeveryfemalehormoneinherbodywasrisingtohappilymeetthemasculinelure.Hesurroundedher,holdingherbodyinthrall,makingherwanttosurrendertohisdominance.Somethinginsidehermelted,wantingtoswayintohispowerfularms.“W-What?”Whatcouldhepossiblywantfromher?
Sheshiveredashecrowdedher,feelingtheheatradiatingfromhisbody.Karawasfivefooteightbarefoot,butSimontoweredoverherinheight,strength,andpower.Heleanedhisheaddown,hislipsnuzzlingherear.“You.Inmybed.Onenight.AnythingIwant,anythingIneed.”Hissultry,lowwhispersentfirecareeningthroughherentirebody
“Me?”Shesqueakedashishungrylipstraileddownthesideofherneck,makinghercoreclenchtightlywithneedandherpussymoist.
“You.Onenight,”herepeatedashishandsmovedtoherhipsandstrokedagainstthesilkrobe,exploringherbodygreedily.
Herheaddroppedtooneside,givinghimfreeaccesstolethimexplorethesensitiveskinatthesideofherneck.OhLord,hefeltgood,smelledgood.Shecouldn’tthinkashismouthdescendedonhers.
Simondidn’task;hedemanded.Histonguepushedagainsttheseamofherlipsinsistentlyandshegaveway,lettinghimtakeher,histongueowninghermouthwithdemandingstrokes.Shereleasedaninvoluntarymoanintohiskiss,feelingravishedandoverwhelmed,herresponseautomaticandwanting.Pushingback,sheentwinedhistonguewithhers,exploringhim,tastinghim.
Withoutreleasingherfromhisimpassionedembrace,hishandscameuptospreadherrobe,runningpossessivefingersovertheresponsiveflesh,thehardenednipples.Healternatelypinchedandstroked,heighteningherdesireuntilshewasoutofcontrol.Astrong,jean-cladthighthrustbetweenherlegsandshepushedagainstit,desperateforthefriction.Herhandsplowedintohiscoarsedarkhair,fistingassherodeawaveoferoticpleasure.
Hepulledhismouthfromhers,pantingasthoughhehadrunamarathon.“God,youaresohot,Kara.Soresponsive.”Herbodywaspulsatingashishandmovedoverherstomach.“Iwantonenight.”
Shejerkedashisfingersreachedhersaturatedpussy,stimulatingthepink,ripeflesh,movinghisthighbacktoexplorehermorethoroughly.
“Sowet,soready,”hehuskedashecircledherclit.“Icansmellyourarousalandit’smakingmecrazy.Iwanttotasteyou.”
“Oh,God.Please.”Karawascaughtupinsensation,heatsizzlingovereverynerveendinginherbody.Herhandswenttohisshoulders,needingthesupporttokeepstanding.
“Sosweet,”hemurmuredinherearbeforehistonguetrailedoverthesideofherneck,flickinginarhythmthatmimickedwhathewantedtodoelsewhere,overwhelmingherwithwhite-hotdesiretofeelitthere,makingherwantthatvelvettonguebetweenherthighs.
Herhipsflexed,needingmorecontact,moreofthosetalented,teasingfingers.“Simon,Ineed-”
“Iknowwhatyouneed.ThesamethingthatIneed!Butfornow,Icangiveyouthis.”Hisfingerszeroedinonherneedybud,slippingthroughhermoistfolds,findingwheresheneededtobetouched.
Shemoanedasheincreasedthepace,theintensity.Shewasmindlesswithrawneedandawhimperescapedfromherlipsasonehandcontinuedhiserotictortureofherbreasts,whiletheotherkeptuparelentlessassaultonherinflamedclit.“Yes.Oh,yes.”Karaknewthepassionate,hotvoicewasherown,butshebarelyrecognizedit.Itwashigh-pitched,keening,beggingforrelief.
Hismouthswallowedhermoan,asthoughhewantedeverybitofherpleasure.Sheresponded,nippingathislip,openingforhispossession,surrenderingcompletely.
Herchannelclenchedandshecouldfeeltheimpendingclimaxallthewaytohertoes.Rippinghermouthfromhis,shethrewherheadbackandletoutalonggroanasapowerfulorgasmtookherover,makingherrideonwavesofpleasurethatshehadneverexperiencedbefore.
Herheaddroppedagainsthisshoulderasripplescontinuedtomakeherbodyshudder.“Oh,God.Whatinthehellwasthat?”ShepantedasSimonclosedherrobeandpulledhersaggingbodyagainsthis.
“Pleasure.Justatasteofwhatwecouldhaveinbed,”herepliedquietly,hislargebodyrockingherslightlyassherecovered.“I’dlikeonenight,Kara.Notbecauseyouhaveto,butbecauseyouwantit,too.I’llhelpyouregardless.It’syourchoicewhetherornottogivemewhatIwant.Butbewarned…Ilikecontrol.”
Stillshattered,hermindinchaos,sheaskedhaltingly,“Whatdoesthatmeanexactly?”
“Totalsurrender,”heansweredinalow,hoarsevoicethatvibratedwithbarely-controlledpassion.“Thinkaboutit.SaythewordandI’llgiveyoueveryounceofpleasurethatI’mcapableofgiving.”
“I’mnotreallythatexperienced.I-I…you’dbedisappointed.”Shehadn’thadsexinmorethanfiveyearsandeventhen,onlywithoneboyfriend.Ithadbeenheronlysexualrelationship,onethathadlastedfiveyearsandendedbadly.
“Idon’twantsexualexpertise.Ijustwantyou,”herepliedabruptlyashemovedback,givingherspace.
Karanoticedthetenselookonhisface,thegroovesaroundhismouth.Eyesdroppingtohisgroin,shecouldseehislargeshaftstrainingagainstthedenim.
Heleanedforwardandgentlykissedherforehead.“Decidelater.You’vebeenthroughalottodayandyouneedtogetoveryourillness.Rest.Eat.Relax.I’llbeinmycomputerlabupstairsifyouneedanything.Ninawillbeheresoonwithyourclothes.Feelfreetokeeptherobe.Itlooksgoodonyou.Butjustsoyouknow…I’llhavearagingerectioneverytimeyouwearit.I’llremembereverysweetsound,everydeliciousresponsefromyouwhileyouwerecominginmyarms.”
Karagraspedthecounterbehindher,herknuckleswhitefromthestrengthofhergripasheturnedandsaunteredaway,musclesripplinginhisperfectlyformedassandbackashecasuallyleftthekitchen.
“Didthatreallyjusthappen?”shewhisperedinanastoundedvoice,hopingthatthiswholedaywasjustabaddreamandshewouldwakeupinherownbed,inherowntinyapartment.
SimonHudsonwasadangertohersanity,andsheneededtostayasfarawayfromhimaspossible.
Fourmonths.Couldshedoit?Shestraightenedherspineandwrappedtherobetighteraroundherbody.Shewasasurvivor;shewouldsurvive.Simonhadmentionedthatsleepingwithhimwasn’tarequirement.Itdidn’thavetohappen.
Karatookadeepbreath,tryingtorelaxherbody.She’ddowhatevershecouldtohelpSimonexceptsleepwithhim.Shecouldcook,clean,helphimoutwithwhateverheneededtohavedone.Nothavingajobwasgoingtoleaveherrestless.Therehadtobeotherthingsshecoulddotorepayhim.
Youwantto.Youknowyouwanthim.
Sheshookherhead,tryingtosilenceherwaywardthoughts.GettinginvolvedwithSimonHudsonwasnotagoodidea.Thebillionairegeniuswasthetypewhowouldleaveherdevastatedafteronenightofpassion.Hehadjustproveditbyrockingherworld,andshehadn’tevenhadsexwithhim.
Butnowyouknowitwouldbeaoneincrediblenightthatyou’dneverforget.
Anditwould.Thatwasherfear.Itwouldbemuchtoomemorable.
Shakingherhead,shesuddenlyrememberedtheclinic.Sheshouldhavebeentherethismorning.
Oh,shit.IhavetocallMaddieHowcouldIhaveforgotten?
KaraspenteverySaturdaymorningvolunteeringatthefreechildren’sclinicwithDr.MadelineReynolds.ItwassomethingKarahadbeendoingeverySaturdaymorningforthelastyearandalthoughshewasn’tyetlicensedasanurse,shehelpedoutbytakingoneverytaskshewascapableofsothatMaddiecouldseeasmanychildrenaspossibleonclinicday.
Karasnatchedupacordlessphonefromthekitchencounterandhastilydialedtheclinicnumber,explainingtoMaddiewhathadhappenedandthatshewassorryshedidn’tmakeit.
“It’snotlikeyou’reapaidemployee,Kara,eventhoughIappreciatethefactthatyoukeepshowinguptohelp.I’mfinefortoday.Areyouokay?Doyouneedaplacetostay?”Maddie’svoicewasconcernedandKara’sheartlifted.Maddiewassogenerous,socaring…butshecouldn’timposeonherfriend.KaraknewthatMaddieputeveryextrapennyshehadintothefreeclinicandshewasfairlyfreshoutofmedicalschool.KarahadheardMaddiesayjokingly,morethanonce,thatshewouldstillbepayingbackstudentloanswhensheretired.
“Nope.I’mgood.Ihavea…friendhelpingmeout,”shereplied,hopinghervoicesoundednormal.
TherewasapausebeforeMaddietoldhersternly,“Youcallmeifyouneedhelp,Kara.Youwill,won’tyou?”
“Iwill.Ipromise.I’llseeyounextSaturday.”
“Staysafe.Ifyoueverfindthatbitchofanex-roommate,feelfreetocallme.I’llbeattheshitoutofher,”Maddiesaid,hervoiceindignant.
Karalaughed.“You’llhavetogetinline.I’mpissedenoughtodoitmyself.”
WithafewmoreassurancestoMaddiethatshewouldbefine,Karahungupwithasighandheadedthroughthecondo,wantingtoseewhatwasleftofherbelongings.
You’llmakeit.You’vemadeitthisfar.Fourmonthswillbeeasy.Someday,youcanreplacewhateverwastaken
Atinglewentdownherspineasshesearchedfortheguestroomthathousedhermeagerbelongings,sensingthatthenextfourmonthswouldbemorechallengingthananythingshe’deverfacedbefore.
Poverty!
Loneliness!
Rejection!
Insecurity!
Fear!
TheyalllookedlikeapieceofcakecomparedtoseveralmonthswithSimonHudson.
Temptationwasgoingtobearealbitch.
Overthenextsixdays,KaradiscoveredthatlivingwithSimonwaseasy…aslongashegothisway.Shecaughtherselfgrumbling,morethanonce,abouthisoverbearingattitudeandtake-chargetactics.Withoutquestion,themanwasgenerousandshehadalreadyhadseveralconniptionfitsoverhowmuchmoneyhespentonher.Clothes,laptop,iPhone,iPod,iPad-Simonlovedgadgetsthatbeganwithani-andanythinghethoughtwasessentialtoherwell-being.Shehadtriedtopatientlyexplainthatshehadlivedwellenoughwithoutthosethingsbefore,butSimonsimplygruntedandsoongaveheranotherso-calledessentialitem,allofwhichweredefinitelynotnecessities.
Theonlyfightthatshehadactuallywonwastheargumentabouthimbuyingheracar.Karahadputherfootdownandrefused,tellinghimthatshepreferredtotakethebus.Honestly,shehadn’treallywonthatargumenteither.Theonlyreasonhehadrelentedwasbecausehehadhisdriver,adelightfulmannamedJames,takehertoschooleverydayandpickherupagainafterclassorclinicals.JamesseemedtobeatSimon’sbeckandcall,eventhoughSimondrovehimselftotheofficeeverymorninginaBugattiVeyron.Karahadalmostchokedthefirsttimeshesawtheoutrageouslyexpensivesleekautomobile,acarthatsheactuallyhadonlyseenpreviouslyinphotos.Simonshrugged,tellingherthatSamhadonetoo,onlySam’swasnewer,afactthatseemedtoirritateSimonwheneverhispreciousvehiclewasmentioned.Karahadrolledhereyesathimandwalkedaway.Honestly,hewasjustlikeaboy…onlyricher-alotricher-andhistoysahellofalotmoreexpensive.
Nina,Simon’spersonalassistantandanotheremployeetowhomshe’dtakenaninstantliking,deliveredKara’snewclothesearlythepreviousSaturdaymorning.Andshehadn’tcomealone.Ithadtakenastringofstrong,able-bodiedmentotrailinwithawholenewwardrobethatdefinitelyhadn’tcomefromWalmartoranormaldiscountstore.Karanowhadahugewalk-inclosetfilledwithexpensivedesignerclothing,mostofwhichshewouldprobablyneverwear.ForGod’ssake,eventhejeansweredesignerandexpensive.Everyitemfitperfectly.Simonhadcheckedthesoiledclothesinherbackpacktogethersize.TheclothingincidenthadbeenthefirstexperienceofmanythatwasteachingKarathatSimonneverdidanythinginasmallway.
Shehadreallybalkedwhenshesawhowmuchmoneyhehaddepositedintohercheckingaccount.Howinthehellhadthemanfoundouthercheckingaccountnumber?Hehadjustraisedhisshouldersagainandtoldhertolethimknowwhensheneededadditionalfundsandhewouldtakecareofit.Additionalfunds?Hehadtransferredonehundredthousanddollarstoheraccount,afactthathadnearlysentherintoheartfailurewhenshehadcheckedherbalance.Anaccountthatusuallysatinthesingledigitshadsuddenlybecomeanendlesssourceofcash.Howcouldanyonespendthatmuchmoneyinafewmonths?Karahadtriedtogethimtotakemostofitback.Havingthatmuchmoneyinheraccount
Actually,shewashappythatshecouldprovidehimwithsomeamusement,becauseshecouldn’tseemtofindanythingelsetodotohelphim.Shefeltswampedbyguiltmostofthetimefortakingadvantageofhisgenerousnature.
Hehadlaundryandcleaningstaffwhocameinonceaweek,soitleftlittleforKaratodoexceptcook,andshehadplentyofextratimetodothat.Bakingandcookingwereabouttheonlyusefulthingsshecoulddotohelp,butSimonseemedtothinkitwassomemonumentaltaskakintosavinghislifewhenshefixedameal.ItseemedthatSimondidn’tcookandexistedmostlyonsandwicheswhenhewasathomebecausehehadneverreallywantedtoemployafull-timechef.Ofcourse,hispersonalassistantboughthisgroceries,ataskthatKarahadtakenoverfromagratefulNina.Simon’sassistantsaidthatshewastiredofseeingSimonliveonthemicrowavedinnersandthesandwichfixingsthatherequestedeveryweek.Thetiny,well-keptwoman,probablysomewhereinhersixties,hadjustutteredanemphatic,“Hallelujah,he’llfinallyeat,”andhandedKarahisusualgrocerylistquitejoyfully.
Karaclosedhernursingbook,herstudyingcomplete,andstretchedoutonherback,rollingonthehugeking-sizedbedintheguestroomuntilshewasstaringattheceiling.
SheshouldaskSimonwhathewantedfordinner,althoughshealreadyknewhowhewouldreply.
AnythingthatIdon’thavetocook!
Heusuallyspentthemorninginhisofficeandtheafternoonandeveninginhiscomputerlabupstairs.Thecondowasenormous,andKarawonderedifshewouldeverfindherwayaroundwithoutmakingafewwrongturns.
Hoppingoffthebed,shewalkedthroughthegorgeouslivingroom,admiringtheviewfromalargepicturewindow.Simonlivedinthepenthouse,thelargestcondointhebuilding,andeverytwinklinglightofTampawasspreadoutinfrontofherinbreathtakingsplendor.Howincredibletohavethissplendidvieweverysinglenight.ShewishedSimonwouldtakeamomenttoenjoyit.Heseemedtobeobsessedwithaprojectrightnowandonlycamedownforabrieftimefordinnerbeforereturningtohislab.
Karawonderedifhewasavoidingherandfeltguiltythathemightbehidinginhisownhome.Theyhadneverspokenaboutwhathadoccurredinthekitchensixdaysago.Theycircledaroundeachotherpolitely,makingsuperficialconversationatdinner.
Assheturnedandmountedtheblackspiralstaircase,sheadmittedtoherselfthatsheactuallywantedhiscompany.Workingandgoingtoschoolhadkeptherbusyandherlonelinessatbay.Now,shehadtoomuchtimewithnothingtodointheeveningsexceptwatchSimon’senormoustelevisionorreadaftershehadfinishedstudying.Solitudewasallwellandgood,butitgotlonesomenightafternight.Atleastwhenshewasworking,shehadthecompanyofcustomersandtheotheremployees.
Disgustedwithherself,sheturnedleftaftershereachedthetopofthestaircase,makingherwaytoSimon’slab.Whatdidshehavetocomplainabout?Shehadeveryluxury,everyconvenience.Shelivedinahomemostpeopleonlydreamedaboutandneverhadtoworryaboutfunds.Still,shewantedalittlemoreofSimon’scompanywhensheshouldjustbedamnedgladshehadaroofoverherheadandanendlessamountoffoodtoeat.
Stoppingoutsidethedoortohislab,shetappedlightly.
“Comein.”Theabrupt,distractedreplymadehersmile.Hewasdefinitelyconsumedwithsomesortofproject.
Usuallyshejustpokedherheadin,butcuriousaboutSimon’slab,sheenteredandclosedthedoorbehindher.ComputerswereeverywhereandSimonhadachaironrollersthatslidfromonecomputertotheother,makingiteasyduetotheplasticthatcoveredthefloorunderthecircleofcomputers.Shepaddedacrosstheplushcarpetuntilherfeetmetthesmoothplasticandpeekedatthecomputerscreens.Gaping,sherealizedsherecognizedthepictureonthelargestscreen.
Squinting,sheaskedquietly,“Hey.IsthatMythWorld?”
Hisheadpoppedupandhemethereyeswithasurprisedlook.“Yeah!Youknowthegame?”
“Knowit?I’matexpertlevel,”sheanswered,slightlyinsultedthathethoughtshewouldn’tbefamiliarwithsuchapopulargame.“LydiahaditandIwashookedaftertryingitthefirsttime.”
ShelovedthegameandalwaysgotsometimeinwhenevershecouldonLydia’scomputer,evenifitwaslateatnight.Itwasheroneindulgence.Shecouldn’tresistlettingthecomputertakehertoawholenewworldwhensheplayedthegame,challenginghertofindoutitssecretsandbattlemythologicalfigures.
Simon’slipsstartedtocurlandkeptgoinguntilhewaswearingashit-eatinggrinthatmadeherheartskipabeat.Itwasthefirsthonest,completelybrilliantsmilethatshehadeverseenfromSimon.Herolledhischairovertothecomputerscreenwiththefamiliarfiguresasheanswered,“It’smygame.ThisisMythWorldII.”
“Oh,myGod.Letmesee.”Shepushedinfrontofhiminherexcitement.Shehadn’tseentheoriginalgameinaweek,andherewasthenewestaddition.Righthereinthehomeshelivedin.“Isitdone?CanIplayit?Ireallymissthatlittlebitofescapism.”
“Ijusthavethedemo.It’snotonthemarketyet.Youcantryitifyoulike,”Simonansweredinanindulgentandboyishvoice.Hewentthroughthecontrolsandstood,allowinghertoplopherrearintheavailablechairandfocusonthenewgame.
Itwassimilar,yetcompletelydifferent,andKaraworriedherbottomlipasshetriedtofigureoutalloftheintricatedetailsofthegame.“Youmadeitharder,”sheaccusedinalaughingvoice.
“Wastheoriginalversioneasy?”heaskedherwithasmileinhisvoice.
“No.Butitwasn’tthishard,”sheanswered,hereyesconcentratingonthebusyscreen.
“Itwas.Youjustaren’tusedtothisoneyet.”Hiseyesscanningherface,heasked,“Whatdoyoulikeaboutthegame?”
“Thestrategy,thechallengeoffiguringoutsecrets,themake-believeworld.It’slikebeingcatapultedintoanotherdimensionforashorttime.”Shetippedhereyestohisasshegotcompletelydestroyedonscreen.“Youareagenius,Simon,”shetoldhimwithcompletehonesty.“IneverrealizedthatthiswasaHudsongame.”
Karacouldalmostswearhewasblushingasheturnedhishead,replyingdiffidently,“It’sjustcomputerstuff.Nothingexciting.”
Shepulledherhandsfromthedeskandfoldedthemneatlyonherlapasshetoldhimemphatically,“It’sincrediblycreative,Simon.Ittakesmorethanprogrammingtocomeupwithsomethinglikethis.”
“I’llputthemonyourlaptop,”hetoldherquietly.
“Oh,Lord,no.I’dnevergetmystudyingdone.”Hereyeslaughedupintohis,hertoneplayful.
“Ithinkyoucancontrolyourself,”hereturned,soundingdisappointed.
“Absolutelynot.IhavenocontrolwhenitcomestoMythWorld.Doyouhaveothergamesthatyou’vedesigned?”
“Ofcourse,dozensofthem.”
“WouldyoumindputtingthemonthePCintheden?”sheaskedhesitantly.
“Youcancomeuphere.Playontheusagecomputer.”Hepointedtoalargecomputerandchairinthecorner.“Allofmygamesareonit.Actually,justaboutanygameyoucanthinkofisonthere.”
Sheputherhandtoherheartinmockastonishment.“Oh,horrors!Youactuallyhaveotherpeople’sgamesonthatcomputer?”
Hemovedclosertoher,toweringoverherwithamischievousgrin.“SometimesIfinditnecessaryto…checkoutthecompetition.”
“Andaretheygood?”Shelookedupathim,lovingthisboyishsideofSimon.
“Nah…butIhavetokeepupwithwhat’sselling,”hetoldher,histoneimpertinent.
God,themanwassohotwhenhewasjokingaround.Ohshit,hewasalwayshot.Shecouldsmellhismasculinescentwithahintofsandalwood.Itwasawarm,richaromathatmadehersquirmandherbodytingle.“Ifyoudon’tmind,I’lltakeyouuponthatoffer.I’musedtobeingbusyandI’mnotuponalltherecenttelevisionshows.Igetalittlelonelysometimes.Thisplaceissobig.”Whyhadsheadmittedthat?“Justdon’tbeupsetwhenIdon’tgetdinnerreadyontime.Igetlostinyourgames,”shetoldhiminamockwarningvoice,anattemptatlevity.
Hecamedownononeknee,hiseyeslevelwithhers.“Areyoulonelyhere,Kara?”Histonesoundedconcerned,dumbfounded,ashisdarkeyesmethers.“Youdon’tlikeithere?”
“No.Oh,no.Simon,it’slovelyhere.HowcouldInotbehappy?”Shesighed,tryingtoexplain.“I’mjustsousedtonothavingmuchtimetothink,muchtimetomyself.IttakesgettingusedtoafterthecrazypaceIhadbefore.”
“Suicidal,youmean,”hesaid,histoneedgy.“Thatlifestylewasdrainingyoudry,Kara.”
“Iknow.AndI’mgrateful.Really,Iam.Thisisjustdifferent,”sheassuredhim,notwantinghimtothinkshewasungrateful.Shit,she’dbeonthestreetsifnotforhisgenerosity,butstill…“I’llbehappierupherewithyou.”
“Youwantmycompany?”Hesearchedherface,soundingbaffled.
“Ofcourse.ButIknowyou’rebusy.AndIthoughtmaybeyouwereavoidingmeafter…well,after…”
“AfterItoldyouthatIwantedtofuckyou?”heaskedbluntly,hiseyesholdinghersprisoner.
“Yes,”shebreathedsoftly,startledbyhisbrusquestatement,butgladthatitwasoutintheopen.Ithadbeensimmering,makingheranxious.
“Iwasn’tavoidingyou,Kara.Iwanttoseeyou,bewithyou,whetheryouwanttofuckmeornot,”hestated,hisvoiceadamant.
“Youdo?”sheaskedwithahintofwonder.“Why?”
“Igetlonelysometimes,too.Ienjoyyourcompany.”
Shetookadeepbreath,willingherracinghearttoslow.
Iwantyoutofuckme.Iwantyoutotakemeahundreddifferentwaysandthendoitagain.
Thebreathleftherbodyashereyesroamedoverhim.Justthinkingaboutthatlarge,solid,dominantbodyoverher,inher,madeherfidgetinherchair.Herfingersitchedtotouchthefacesoclosetoherown,tostrokethesexy,roughjawwiththesensualfiveo’clockshadowthatmadehisscarsnearlyinvisible.Strangely,thosesmallscarsaddedtohissexappeal,makinghimmoremasculine,moreirresistible.
No,Kara.Don’tthinkaboutit.Dinner.Youcametoaskhimaboutdinner.SimonHudsoniswayoutofyourleague.
“I-Iactuallycametoaskyouwhatyouwantedfordinner.”Hervoicewasunsteadyandshewaspracticallystumblingoverherwords.Simon’scloseproximitywasgettingtoher,makingherwantmuchmorethanjusthiscompany.Shescootedherchairbackandstood,nervouslywipinghersweatypalmsonherjeans.
Itdidn’thelp.Simontoweredoverherasherosetohisfeet.“I’llhelpyou.I’mdoneherefornow.”
Karagulped,wonderingifthemassivekitchenwasbigenoughforbothofthem.Shewantedtobenearhim,butnotsoclosethatthelongingthatshefeltoverwhelmedher.“Okay.Let’sgoseewhatwecanroundup.”Herstrideswerelongandquickassheledthewaytothekitchen,happythatshewouldhaveSimon’scompany,butnotquitesurehowtodealwithhertreacherousbodyanditsreactiontohim.
Totalsurrender.
Whatexactlyhadhemeantbythat…anddidshereallywanttofindout?Simonknewhewasslowly,silentlybecomingcompletelyunglued.Hismindwaswanderingtoplacesitshouldn’tgo,andhe’dhadtoworkextrahoursthelastseveraldaysjustbecausehecouldn’tthinkofanythingexceptthefactthatKarawashere,inhishome,drivinghimcloserandclosertoinsanity.
IfIdon’tfuckhersoon,I’mgoingtobecomeunhinged.
Gladhewasfollowingbehindhersothatshecouldn’tseehisobviouserection,hewatchedherhipsswayinapairofass-huggingjeansashefollowedhertothekitchen.Herfresh,alluringscentwaftedfromherbodyandhebreatheditinlikeamandeprivedofoxygen,hungryforherfragrance.Hesmelledhereverywhere,evenhisbedroom.Heraromaseemedtoclingtoeveryportionofhishouse,remindinghimofherpresence.Likehecouldforgetit?
Whatwasitaboutherthatfascinatedhimsomuch?Itwasn’tasifshetriedtomakeherselfirresistible.Sheworeverylittlemake-upandhehadyettoseeherinanythingexceptjeans-minustheheart-stoppingnightthatshehadappearedinthattightminiandsweater-buthewascompletelyenthralled.
“Whydon’tyouhaveaboyfriend?”heaskedcuriously.“Wouldn’tithavebeeneasiertogotoschoolifyouhadamaninyourlife?”
TheyhadreachedthekitchenandKarawaspullinglettuce,peppers,andothervegetablesfromtherefrigerator.“Doyouwanttohelpcutthevegetablesforasalad?I’llputinsomesteaks.”Shepulledmeatfromtherefrigeratorbeforeadding,“WhywouldIwantaboyfriendwhenI’mgoingtoschool?”Givinghimaperplexedlook,shepulledoutacuttingboardandhandedhimaknifefromtheblock.
“Someonetohelp.Wouldn’titbeeasier?”herepliedashewashedthevegetablesandstartedcuttingawkwardly.Cookingwasnotoneofhisbestskills.
Healmostslicedthroughhisfingerassheburstoutlaughingbeforeanswering,“Inmyexperience,boyfriendsaren’texactlyhelpful.”
Shewasamused,butSimoncouldhearatouchofhurtinhervoice.“Badexperience?”
“Yes.”
“Whathappened?”
Sheputthesteaksinthebroilerandbumpedhimoutoftheway.Sheopenedtherefrigeratorandpulledoutabeer.Twistingthetopoff,shehandedittohimandshooedhimawaytotheislandsittingarea.“I’llcut.You’relikelytoamputateadigitortwo.”
Simonfrownedashetookaseatandwatchedherprofileassheslicedanddicedlikeaprofessional.“So,whathappened?”
Shesighed.“IdatedChrisforfiveyears.Ithoughtwewouldendupmarried.Unfortunately,IcamehomefromworkearlyonedayandcaughthiminbedwiththepersonIthoughtwasmybestfriend.”
Wastheguytotallyinsane?HehadKarainhisbedeverynightandhewantedsomeoneelse?“Hewasanidiot.”
“Itwasn’tmeanttobe.I’mactuallythankfulthatIwasn’tmarriedtohim.”
“Itstillhurtyou.”
Sheshrugged.“Itwasalongtimeago.”
“Bastard.”Simoncouldn’thelphimself.Hewantedtohurttheasshole.
“Whataboutyou?”Sheglancedtowardhimasshescrapedslicedgreenpeppersintothesaladbowl.
“Whataboutme?”
“Girlfriend?IfeellikeImightbecrampingyourstyle.Melivinghere,Imean.”Shedidn’tlookathimasshestartedonthetomatoes.
Heshrugged.“I’veneverhadone.”
Shestoppedslicingandgapedathimwithalookofastonishment.“Seriously?”
Simondidn’tincludetheonewomanwhohadchangedhislifeforever,attheageofsixteen.Hehadn’tspokenhernameortalkedaboutherinyears.Nottoanyone.
“Nope.I’mnotexactlyasocialkindofguy.Samisthecompulsivedater.He’sgotthelooksforit,”hereplieddryly,takingaswigofhisbeer.
ShemumbledsomethingthatSimondidn’tquitecatch.
“Whatwasthat?”heasked,wonderingwhyherfacewasturningbeetred.
“Isaidthatyou’rebetterlooking.”
Simonalmostdroppedhisbeer,barelycatchingitbeforeitfellintohislap.“HaveyouseenSam?”
Shebreezedouttothediningroomtoputthesaladonthetable,callingoutbehindher.“Sure.YouhavepicturesofhimandHeleneverywhere.”
Hisjawdroppedandhewaiteduntilshecamebacktocheckthesteaksbeforereplyingroughly,“Thenyouknowthat’snottrue.”
“Inmyopinion,itis,”shetoldhimstubbornly.“Justdon’tgetafatheadoverit.”
Simongrinned.OnlyKaracouldthrowoutacomplimentandthenimmediatelydeflatehim.Still,hecouldn’tbelievesheactuallyfoundhimattractive.“Whataboutmyscars?Samisamovie-star-handsomeblondwithgreeneyes.Womenseemtolovethat.”WomenlovedSam…andSamlovedwomen.Allofthem!Hecharmedwomenofallages.Toobadthathecouldn’tseemtokeepthatadorationaftertheystarteddatinghim.
“IguessIprefermymentall,dark,andgrouchy,”shetoldhimlightlyasshepulledthesteaksfromtheoven.
Hegrabbedapotholder,hisgrinbroadeningashetookthesizzlingsteaksfromher,droppingoneoneachofthetwoplatesthatshehadsetout.Hewatchedherfromhoodedeyes,tryingtofigureoutifshewasactuallyflirtingwithhim.Hedidn’thaveaclue.Maybeshewasjustbeingnice.Afterall,shedidn’tknowSamandshewaslivinginhishouse.Still,hercommentwarmedhim,madehimfeelspecial.NoonehadeverconsideredhimhandsomewhencomparedtoSam,exceptpossiblyhismother.Thewomenwhohadsexwithhimdidsoforfinancialgain.Amutualagreementthathadsuitedhimjustfine…withthosewomen!
Karawasanaltogetherdifferentstory.Instinctively,SimonknewanarrangementwithKarathatwassimilartohispreviousoneswoulddestroyhim.
Astheysettledatthediningroomtable,Simonsuddenlyrememberedwhathehadmanagedtoobtainforherearlier.“Ihavesomethingforyou.”
Henearlylaughedasshefrownedathim,shakingherheadasshesaid,“Simon,I’mnottakingonemorething.You’vedoneenough.Waytoomuch.”
Hedidn’tthinkhehaddonenearlyenough,buthereplied,“You’lltakethis.”
“No…Iwon’t.”
God,helovedthatstubbornlookonherface.Hetippedthediningroomchairbackandreachedintothefrontpocketofhisjeans.Heheldouthishand,butKarawasstillshakingherheadtenaciously,sohedroppedtheobjectonthetable.
“Oh,myGod,”Karabreathedsoftly,hervoicefilledwithaweanddelight.Shereachedfortheringwithtremblingfingers,slidingitonherfingerslowly.“Mymother’sring.Ididn’tthinkIwouldeverseeitagain.Howdidyoufindit?”
“Pawnshop,”hereplied,gladthathehadmadesomeofhisemployeestrollalloftheareastoresforthering.“Iknewitwastheonethingthatyouweresadtolose.”
“It’snotexpensive,butitmeansagreatdealtome.It’stheonlythingIhaveleftthatbelongedtomymom,”shechoked,hervoicewobblingwithemotion.
Simonwouldnevertellherthatherroommateonlygotafewdollarsforthepieceofjewelryonherfinger.Itwasaninexpensiveringshapedlikeabutterflywithatinyamethystchipinthecenter,butSimonhadseenKara’ssorrowoverlosingit.
“I’mgladwecouldfindit.”
Simonneversawhercoming.Sheflewfromherchair,herdeliciousasslandinginhislapandherarmsflungaroundhisneck.Hisarmstightenedaroundherwaisttokeepherfromslidingasshepepperedhimwithkisses.Onhisface,onhishair,everywherethatshecouldreach.Hecouldfeeltheexcitementradiatingfromherbody,joyoozingfromeverypore.“Thankyou,Simon.You’rethemostwonderfulmanonearth.”
Oh,Christ!Asmuchashelovedherenthusiasmandtreasuredherhappiness,ifshedidn’tstopbouncingthatlusciousrearendagainsthim,hewasgoingtocomeinhispants.Heramplebreastswererubbingagainsthischestandherscentwasmakinghimwanttodevourher.Everydelightfulinchofher.“IthinkIdeservearealkiss.Itoldyouthatyouwouldacceptit,”hementionedsoftly,hisvoicesultry.
Shethreadedherfingersthroughhishairandtheireyescollidedasshetippedhisheadback.Simon’sheartstutteredashesawthehungry,passionateglowofhergaze.
Herlidsloweredslowlyashermouthdescendedtohis.Simonclosedhiseyesandmovedonehanduptothebackofherhead,sighingashisfingerssiftedthroughhersilkymassofdarkhair.Shetastedlikewomanandneed,andherespondedwithanuncontrolleddesirethatnearlypushedhimovertheedge.Hertongueteasedhisbetweenlittlenibblesonhislipsanditmadehimwantmore,needmore.Puttingpressuretothebackofherhead,hecrushedhermouthtohis,wantingtoplunderandexploreeveryinchofthesweetcavern.Thehandonherwaistslidtoherass,bringingheralmostfullyagainsthim,makinghimgroanintohermouthastheirtonguesdueledandtasted.
Shewassoresponsive,soeager,thatSimonlosthimselftoherinthatmoment,notcaringifhewaseverfound.Kara.Kara.Hernamepoundedagainsthisbrainashetriedtoconsumeher,ownher.Feralpossessivenessdrovehimashismaraudingtonguesweptintohermouth,overandover,slidingsensuouslyagainsthers
Shepulledhermouthaway,pantingassheburiedherfaceinhisneck.Simoncouldfeelherhotbreathagainsthisearasshedeliveredsmalllicksandnipsdownthesideofhisneck.
“Kara,I’mnotasaint.”JesusChrist,hecouldn’ttakemuchmoreofthis.Hiscockwashardenoughtopoundnailsandeveryinstinctwasscreamingathimtotakeher.
“Iwantyou,Simon.Desperately.”Herfuck-me-breathlessvoicesayingthoseparticularwordsmadeSimongroan,desperatetobeinsideher.Still…
“Don’tdothisoutofgratitude,”hegrowled.
Shepulledbacktolookathim,hereyesshiningwithneed.“Iwouldneverdothisoutofgratitude.I’mtiredoftryingtofightthisattractionbetweenus,Simon.Iwantmyonenight.Theonethatyouoffered.”
Onenight.Simon’sheartwasthundering.“Totalsurrender?”
“I’mnotsurewhatthatmeans…butyes…totalsurrender.Iknowyouwouldneverhurtme.”
Hertrustandfaithinhimnearlybroughthimtohisknees.Shehadnoideawhatlieahead,butshewantedhimenoughtoagreetohisrequest.Henuzzledherearashewhisperedharshly,“ItmeansthatIneedcontrol.Iwanttotieyoutomybed,blindfoldyou,andfuckyouuntilneitherofusisabletomove.”
Simonfelthershiverinhisarms,butsheansweredsoftly,“Thendoit.Takemetobed,Simon.”
Barelyabletobelieveshewasinhisarmsandwilling,Simonstoodandcarriedhertowardhisbedroom,hopinghewasn’tinthemiddleofthebestwetdreamhehadeverhad.KaratrembledasSimonsweptherupinhisstrong,musculararmsandcradledhergentlyagainsthispowerfulbody.Hadshereallyjusttoldhimtotakehertobedanddoanythinghewantedtoher?Yes…shehad…andshewasshakingwithanticipation.Whatshehadtoldhimwastrue.Shewastiredoffightingherattractiontohim,anattractionthatwassomuchmorethanatinybitofchemistry.Drawntohimasshehadneverbeentoanotherman,thestrugglewasfutile,theoutcomeinevitable.Herbodyburnedtobetakenbyhim,andonlyhim.
Asmart,street-wisewomanshouldprobablyfightthetemptation.ButKarahadneverbeenenticedbyamanlikeSimonHudson.Hewasanenigma,amysterythatshehadn’tyetsolved.Gruff,abrupt,brilliant…butalsoconsiderate,kind,andeverynowandthenshecaughtavulnerabilitythatmadeherwanttoholdhimcloseandsoothehisbatteredsoul.Karahadnodoubtthatatsomepointinhislife,SimonHudsonhadbeenhurt.Badly!Howcouldsheresisttheyearningshehadforhim?Shehadtohaveonenightwithhim,onechancetoexperiencetruedesire.Ifshedidn’tgraspthisopportunity,Karaknewshewouldregretitfortherestofherlife.Itwasgutinstinct,butshehadgrownuptoughandhadlearnedtogowithherintuition.
Ithadbeenscreamingathertonight,beatingathertoacceptSimon’searlierproposition,tellingherthatsheshouldtakethechancetoexperienceapassionanddesireunlikeanythingshehadeverexperiencedbeforeandthatmightnevercomealongagain.
ShefeltherfeethittheplushcarpetinSimon’sbedroomasheloweredherslowlytotheground,theirbodiesslidingtogetheruntilshefoundherfooting.Hisexpressionwasvolatile,hiseyesdarkwithhungeranddesireashismouthcamedownonhers.Rawneedrippedthroughherandshetightenedherarmsaroundhisneckasheplunderedhermouth,pullingtheclipfromherhairandburyinghisfingers,pullinghermouthtighteragainsthis.Onehandcamedownandgrippedherasstightly,pullingherupandagainsthisharderection,makinghermoanintohismouthwithherdesireforhimtobeinsideher.Shewasalreadywet,ripeforhispossession
Needingsomeskintoskincontact,shereachedforhisshirt,desperatetotouchhisbareskin.
“No,”hebarkedasherippedhismouthfromhersandgraspedherwrist.
“Ijustneededtotouchyou,”shepanted,confusedbyhiscompletechangeofattitude.
“Ineedyounaked.Thishastogomyway,Kara,”hetoldherquietly.“ItoldyouwhatIwanted.Iwascompletelyserious.”
Hisvoicewasdemanding,butKaracouldhearatingeofvulnerabilityinhisstatement.Wantinghispossessionmorethanshewantedhernextbreath,shestoodbackandpulledhert-shirtoverherhead.Poppingopenthebuttonofherjeans,sheloweredthezipperasshemethiseyeswithnoshynessorhesitation.Shimmyingoutofthetightdesignerjeans,sheletthemdroptothefloor,kickingoutofthemastheystoppedatherankles.Shestood,hereyesneverleavinghis,inaveryflimsyblacksilkbraandmatchingthong.
“HolyChrist.You’rethemostbeautifulwomanI’veeverseen,”hebreathedreverentlyashecuppedhercheekandlethisfingerslideslowlyoverherfaceanddownthesideofherneck,untilhereachedtheswellofherbreasts,accentuatedbythebarely-therebra.
“It’stheexpensivelingerie,”shetoldhimsoftly,herbreathhitchingashecaressedthetopsofherbreastslightly,makinghershiverwithdesire
“It’syou,”heanswered,hisfingersreachingforthefrontclaspofthebra.Itgavewayeasily,spillingherbreastsintohiswaitinghands.“You’reperfection.”
Karashookherarmsandthematerialdroppedtothefloorsilently.Shehissedashishandsroamedoverherbody,cuppingthetenderfleshofherbreasts,histhumbsteasinghersensitivenipples.Hisfingersbranded,leavingtrailsofheatwhereverhetouched.
“AlthoughIlovethosepanties,theyneedtogo,”heinsistedinahuskyvoice,amerewhisper,ashismouthnippedatthelobeofherear.
Theyweregoneinseconds,herdesiretohavehiminsideherintense,hercorescreamingforrelief.
LongingandapprehensionwarredinhermindasshestoodinfrontofSimon,completelynaked.“Simon,Ihaven’tbeenwithanyoneforalongtime.”
“Howlong?”hegrowled,hishandcuppingherasspossessively.
“Fiveyears.AndeventhenIwasn’tverygoodinbed.TherewasonlyChris,andIwasn’tenoughtosatisfyhim,”sheansweredsoftly,tryingnottolettheinsecuritiesofthepasthammeragainstherbrain.
“Didhefuckingtellyouthat?”Heinsistedonknowing,hisbreathhotagainstherneck.
“Yes.Hesaidthat’swhyheneededanotherwoman,”shechokedout,humiliated.ShehadbelievedChris.Eventhoughhewasherfirstandonly,sheknewsomethinghadbeenseriouslylacking.
“Hewasacompleteidiot,Kara.You’reallthewomananymancouldwantordreamabout.ExactlywhatIneed.Itwashisissue,notyours,”hegrunted,placinghishandsonbothsidesofherheadandpullingherawayfromhisbodyuntilhiseyesmethers.
“Iwantthis.Ireallydo.Iwantyou.I’mjustalittlenervous,”sheadmitted,herbodystillsingingwitharousal.“Idon’twanttodisappointyou.”
“Listentome,”hegrumbledashishandsfistedinherhair.“Youcouldnever,everdisappointme.IwantyousobadlyI’mreadytolosemymind.Ihaveyou.Ihavecontrol.Imakethedecisions.Youhavenothingtodoexcepttocome,asloudandaslongasyouwantto.Youpleasemejustbybeinghereandwantingme.AslongasIcanmakeyoucome,I’llbeecstatic.”
Shesighed,herbodyrelaxing.Simonwouldmakeitgood.Shealreadyknewthat.“Thenmakemecome,Simon.Takemetobed.”
Simonpickedherupandplacedherinthemiddleofthebed,pullingthebeddingdownroughlyuntilitlaycrumpledattheendofthebed.Herasswasstrokedbytheblacksilkfittedsheetthatstillremainedunderherasshescooteduponthebed.
Simonsatontheedgeofthebed,hishandreachingforthedrawerbesidethebed.Heyankedfourfur-linedhandcuffs,completewithattachedhardware,fromthedrawer,followedbyalongstripofblacksilk.
“Completesurrender,”shemurmuredsoftlyassheleanedbackagainstthesilk-coveredpillows.
“Yes,”heansweredsoftly,hiseyesrakingherbodyhungrilyashereachedforherarmtoattachthefirstcuff
ShehadnodoubtthatSimonhaddonethismanytimesbefore.Hehadhersecuredtothebed,spread-eagled,inlessthanaminute.Shewatchedhim,hiseyesravenousonherbodyashewentthroughthemotions.
Shewassurprisedbyherownreaction.Themorehelplesshemadeher,asheattachedeachlimbtothebed,themorearousedshebecame.Beingspreadoutforhispleasuregaveherafreedomshehadneverexperienced.Nodecisionstomake,nowonderingwhatwouldpleasehim.Hewasthemasterandallshehadtodowaswaitforherpleasure.Therewassomethingsoeroticaboutbeingboundtohisbedthatherhipsrotatedandshemoanedsoftlyassheyankedonthecuffs,feelingalmostnogive,butnopain.
“Areyougoingtogagme?”sheaskedcuriously,butnotafraid.
“Oh,hellno.Iwanttoheareverylittlecryofpleasure,everysweetlittlesoundthatyoumakeasyoucomeforme.”
Theheatflowingoverherbodyspikedtoboilingathisgrowling,sexywords.Sheclosedhereyes,sodesperateforreleasethatshewhimperedsoftly.
Openinghereyesagain,shesawhisface,fierceandravenous,beforeheblockedhervisionwithaswatchofblacksilk,obliteratingallofhersight,leavingeverythingpitchblack.Amomentofpanicseizedher,butshefeltSimon’shotbreathhitherear,histonguetracingtheedgesashewhispered,“Beingsightlesswillheighteneverysensation,Kara.Everytouchofmytonguewillbesharper,moreacute.Everythingmorearousing.”
“I’marousedenough,Simon.ForGod’ssake,touchmebeforeIdieoflonging,”shewhined,waitinginthedarknesstofeelhim.
Sheheardalow,rumblingchuckleasheleftthebed,hisclothesrustlingastheyhittheground.Thebeddippedwithhisweightashereturned.“Youlooksoincrediblybeautifulit’shardtodecidewheretostart.I’veimaginedthisforsolong.Ican’tbelieveyou’rereallyherewithme.Inmybed.”Hisvoicewasrough,graveled.
Karawasabouttoopenhermouthtotellhimtopickanyspot,justpleasestartnow,whenhismouthcoveredhers.Hiskisswasvoraciousandfilledwithlonging.Hewasnakedandshesighedintotheembraceasshefelthisblazinghotskinagainsthers.Hismaraudingtongueandmouthclaimedheroverandover,whileawanderinghandstrokedherbody,teasinghernipples,slidingoverherhip,slippingbetweenherbound,spreadlegsandintoherwetfolds.
Shebrokehermouthfromhis,pantingashisfingersslippedintohertenderflesh,brushingoverherswollen,sensitiveclit.“Please,Simon.Oh,God.”Sheneededhim.Herwholebodyburnedandshejerkedatherbindings,desperateformorecontact.
Hislipsmoveddownoverherbreasts,histonguestrokingandgentlybitingatonenipple,andthentheother.Heslidonefingerintoherchannel,andthenanother,stretchingher,openingher,makingherwishhewouldfillherwithhiscock.
“Jesus,Kara.You’resowet,sotight,”hemurmuredhotlyagainsthernipple,hisbodytenseagainsthers.
Withhersightgoneandherlimbsbound,allKaracoulddowasfeel,andSimonwasplayingherbodylikeitwasamusicalinstrument.Itwasheighteninghersenses…toanalmostunbearablelevel.“Ineedyou.Please.”
“Soon,sweetheart,”hecroonedasthatwickedtonguetraileddownherabdomen,flickingintoherbellybutton,beforeitfinallylavedthelipsofherpussy,makinghercryoutandshudderwithfierce,achinglust.Hisfingerssiftedthroughthewell-trimmedhaironhermoundasthattalentedtongueslidalongherslickfolds,delvingdeeperanddeeperasshereleasedaseriesofshort,incoherent,pulingnoises.
Herbackarched,strainingagainstherbindings,ashisfirm,insistentmouthcircledherneedybud,beforefinallylatchingoverthenub,clampingitlightlywithhisteeth.White-hotneedhitherlikelightning,herbodysizzlingashepositionedthenakednubforhisflicking,relentlesstongue.
“Oh,God,Simon.”Hervoicewashoarseandneedy,begginghimtoletherclimax.Everynerveinherbodywasaliveandtingling,hercoreclenchingwithlongingasthepressurebuilttoanalmostunbearablelevel.
Hislargehandsslidunderherass,bringingherpussytightagainsthismouth.ThepressureincreasedonherclitandKaracouldfeelherclimaxripthroughher,everyinchofherbodyshakingasspasmsgrippedandreleased.Overandover.“Yes.Oh,yes.”Herheadfellbackandshemoanedwithabandonasherentirebodywentupinflames.Simonlappedatthejuicesthatflowedfromher,murmuringhisenjoymentofeverydrop.
Sheshuddered,feelinghisexquisite,burning,nakedfleshagainsthersasheslidupandoverher.
Hismouthcoveredhersandshesighedintohiskiss,tastingherownessenceonhismouth.DearGod,shehadneverexperiencedanorgasmsostrong,sointense.Shereturnedthekiss,tryingtomakeSimonunderstandthesignificanceofwhathadjusthappened,ofwhatshehadexperienced,bypouringeveryounceofpassionshefeltintotheembrace.
“Thatwasincredible,”shebreathedasshepulledhermouthaway.Feelinghishardcockagainstherthigh,shesquirmed,morethanreadyforhimtotakeher,knowingitwouldfillmorethanoneemptyplaceinsideher.Primitiveandwild,shebuckedagainsthim,beggingforhisuntamedpossession.
“Youtastelikefinewine,Kara.Icouldhavestayedthereallday,”hemumbledinaravenous,yearningvoice.“You’resobeautiful.Soverybeautiful.”
“Soareyou,Simon.Pleasefuckme,”shegroaned,herbodypleadingforhim.
“Tellmethatyouwantme,thatyouneedme,”hedemanded,histonerawandharsh.
Shecouldfeeltheheadofhismembernudgingagainsthertightopening.
“Oh,shit.Condom,”Simongroanedpainfully.
Sheliftedherhips,needinghiminsidehersobadlythatshewasreadytoscream.“I’monthepilltoregulatemyperiods.I’mcovered.I’mclean.”
“I’mclean,too,andthiswouldbemyfirsttimewithoutacondom.Iwon’tlast,butIwantyouthisway.Nothingbetweenus,”hewarnedher,hisbreathheavyandhotagainstherneck.
“Idon’tcare.Comeinsideme,Simon.Iwantyousomuch.Ineedyousobadly,”shebeggedwithaslightsob,completelyoutofcontrol.
Hishipsthrustforwardandshewasinstantlyfilled.Hewasbigandshehadn’thadamaninsideherforsolong.Simonstretchedher,forcingherwallstoexpandandaccepthim.Herslick,wetfleshgaveway,allowinghimentranceashismassivememberlodgedcompletelyinsideher.
“God,sweetheart,you’resotight,”Simonchoked,almostasifhewereinpain.“Sohot.Youfeelsodamngood,soincredible.”
“Yes,”shepanted,completelyfilled,completelytakenbySimon.Hisbigbodyconsumedher,dominatedherashepulledbackandenteredheragain,rubbingagainstherg-spot,drivingherhigherandhigherasheincreasedhispace.Hishipspistonedintoher,onehandslidingunderherasstopullheruptomeethim,makingtheirskinslaptogetherinasatisfying,forcefulmeeting.
Inthedark,Karaabsorbedeverysensation,everythrust.Simonwasmakingherbodysingwithpleasureandshegraspedthechainsonthecuffs,herfingersdiggingintothemetalasshecriedouthisname.Hisbodyslammedintohersandsherelishedeachthrust,everypumpofhiships.Theirbodieswerebothslickwithsweatandtheymovedagainsteachotherinaneroticslide.AdustingofhaironSimon’schestabradedhernipplesashemoved,addingtoherarousal,makinghermoanasshemovedherheadfromsidetoside,notsureifshecouldbearthesensationoverload.
“Comeforme,Kara.Come.Iwanttowatchyourpleasure.”Hislow,seductivevoicewhisperedtoher,coaxedher,ashiscockfilledheragainandagain.Fasterandfaster.
Whenhishandmovedbetweentheirbodiesandboldlystrokedherclit,sheexplodedasecstasyseizedher,seeingbrilliantcolorsflashthroughthedarknessasherbodypulsedandherchannelspasmedaroundhiscock,milkinghim.
“Oh,Jesus,Kara,”Simongroaned.“You’resosweet.Andsodamnedhot.”Hismouthcamedownonhersasheenteredheronelasttime,asthoughhewantedtopossesseverypartofher,spillinghimselfdeepinsideherwithaharsh,torturedgroan.
Theybothcamebacktorealityslowly.Simonpulledawayfromherandrolledtoherside,hisheadrestingonhershoulder,hisarmsaroundherbody,squeezingherpossessively.Herlipssearched,kissingthetopofhisheadasshetriedtocatchherbreath.
HerheartwasthunderingandshewishedshecouldseeSimonrightnow,hishairmussed,hiseyesstillsmokywithspentpassion.Shewasnearlydestroyedbythedepthsofherfeelings.Scared.Exhilarated.Confused.Shewasajumbled-upmessatthemoment,notquitesurehowtofeelorhowtoreact.Sexhadneverbeensoall-consumingforher.Whatinthehellhadhappened?
Simon.Simonhadhappened.Andshewouldneverbethesame.
Shefelthiskiss,alightcaresstoherlips,beforeherolledoutofbed.Sheheardthezipperofhisjeanscloseandknewthathewasgettingdressed.Itwasonlymomentsbeforeshewasfreeandtheblindfoldwasbeingremoved.
Hishairwasadorablymussedandhiseyeswererakinghernudebodyasthoughhewasreadytohaveheragain.Karashivered,notonlyfromhernakedness,butfromthetorturedlookshesawinhiseyes.
Hescoopedherupandcarriedherdownthehalltoherroom.Hepulledthecoversbackanddepositedherinthemiddleofherbed,pullingthecoversoverhernudeform.Theroomwasdark,theonlyilluminationcomingfromthewindowandthebrightnessofthemoon,butshecouldseehisfrown.
Didheregretwhathappened?Washeupsetthathehadjustsleptwithawomanhebarelyknew?Soupsetthathewantedtogetridofher,putherbackinherownbedandforgettheircataclysmicjoininghadeverhappened?
Orperhaps,ithadonlybeenlife-changingforher.
Leaningforward,hekissedherforeheadlightlyandwhisperedinalowhuskyvoice,“Thankyou,Kara.I’llneverforgettonight.”
Tearschokedher,jammingthebackofherthroat.Shecouldn’tanswer,couldn’taskanyofthequestionsshesodesperatelywantedtoask.
Heexitedtheroom,closingthedoorsoftlybehindhim.
Gone.Justlikethat.Hehadn’tevenwantedtosleepwithher.
Karaletgoofhertears,lettingthemslidedownhercheeksassherestedherheadagainstthepillow,wonderingwhathadjusthappened.HavingSimondumpherbackinherroomafterthemostincrediblesexualencounterofherlifewaslikebeingslappedintheface.Withaheavydoseofreality.
He’sabillionaire,Kara.Wakeup.Didyouthinkhewantedanythingmorethanacasualscrew?
Shehadtoremindherselfthatshewasabiggirl.Shehadgoneintotheencounterwithhereyeswideopen,knowingitwasnothingmorethanonenight.
Thenwhydoesthishurtsodamnmuch?
Slidingquietlyoutofbed,Karaopenedoneofthedrawersofherdresserandslippedintoanightgownbeforereturningtoherbed.Shedrewthecoverstightlyaroundherasherbodyquaked.Simonhadbeensohot,sowarm.Nowallshefeltwascoldandempty.
Pushingasidehisrejectionandherhurtfeelings,Karatriedtoreasonoutthesituation.Regardlessofwhathefeltforher,Simonhadsomeissues.Therestraints,theblindfold,notwantinghertoseehimwhentheyhadsex.Maybehelikedalittlekink—shehadcertainlydiscoveredthatshelikedit—butsomethingmorewasgoingoninhishead
Somethingdeeper.
Somethingdarker.
He’dneverhadagirlfriend?That,initself,wasstrange.Hecertainlydidn’tlacksexualprowess.Hewasincrediblyrichandashandsomeassin.Whyhadheneverhadalong-termrelationship?
Kararolledtoherback,hermindracing.Simon’sproblemswerereallynoneofherbusinessandshedoubtedifhewouldappreciateherpokinghernoseintohislife.Butshewantedtohelphim.Itwasn’thisfaultthathecouldn’tcareforher.He’dbeennothingbutgenerousandkind.Ifshecouldhelphim,maybehecouldfallinloveandhavearelationshipwithawomanhecouldlovesomeday.
Herguttwistedandherchestsqueezedtightlyatthethought,butshetriedtoignoreit.Simondeservedtobehappy.Sheneededtobeafriendandtrytogettothebottomofhisissues.
Youwanttobemorethanhisfriend,andyouknowit.
“Shutthehellup,”shewhisperedfuriouslytothedarkroom,floppingontoherstomachandpullingapillowoverherhead,asthoughheractionswouldsilencehertreacherousthoughts.
Itdidn’t.AndittookKaraquitesometimetofinallyfallintoatroubled,restlesssleepthatbroughtdisturbingdreamsofahandsome,dark-haired,dark-eyedmanwithanexpressionfilledwithanguishandmisery,tryingtofightdemonsthathecouldn’ttrulysee.Inthedream,Karawasanobserver,tryingdesperatelytoreachthemaninagony,holdingherhandouttohim,begginghimtolatchontoher,toletherhelphim.Hestartedtoslowlyliftonehand,stillstabbingatthedarkwiththeother,tryingtovanquishtheclawing,darkshadowsthatthreatenedhim.Finally,hishandmethers,hisgripfirmandshetuggedwitheveryounceofstrengthshehad,tryingtobringhimtoher.
Intheend,shecouldn’t.Themanyankedherintothedarknessandsheletoutaterrified,blood-curdlingscreamashepulledhertohim,takingherintoadeep,dark,whirlingvortex.
Hefell,andshewentwithhim,knowingneitherofthemwouldeverescape.
SimonwokethemorningafterhisincrediblesexualencountersurroundedbythetantalizingscentofKaraandfeelinglikesomethingwasmissingfromhisbed.
Herolledtohisback,hiscockhardandswollen,tryingnottothinkabouttheheart-stoppingeventsofthenightbefore.Hepulledapillowoverhisfaceandbreathedinherfragrance,ascentthatwouldlikelyhaunthimforever.Andeverytimeheimaginedherscent,hewouldthinkabouthertaste.Hersmile.Hermoans.Herabsolutelybeautifulnudebody.Hercriesasshecameforhim,herfleshtighteningaroundhimuntilhefoundrelease.
Oh,fuck.Hewassoscrewed.
Lastnighthadbeenalife-changingeventforhim.Neveragainwouldhebeabletosettleforjustanywomaninhisbed,anunemotionalfucktosatisfyhisbody.
Hewasn’tsurewhethertobecompletelypissedofforinaweofthewomanwhomadehimfeelthisway.Sure,heonlyhadonewomanatatime.Hewasmonogamousinafucked-upsortofway,alwayscallingthesamewomanuntilhewentontothenextone,butnotbecauseonewasreallyanybetterthantheonebefore.Ortheonebeforethat.Therejustcameatime,andhecouldalwayssenseit,whenhethoughtheshouldmoveontoavoidanyentanglements.Notthatanywomanhadeverreallywantedhim,buttheybegantowantmoreandmoreofwhathiswealthcouldprovide.
Hepulledthepillowfromhisface,butitdidn’trelievethebone-deepachethathehadforKara.Takingherbacktoherownbedhadbeenoneofthehardestthingshehadeverdone.Butshehadonlyofferedonenight,andhehadneverbeenabletosleepwithawoman.Hewasn’tcapableofitandhadneverwantedto…untillastnight.HehadwantedtofallasleepwithKarainhisarms,herbodydrapedaroundhis,herwarmbreathonhisface.
Hehadreturnedtohisroom,buthehadn’tbeenabletosleep.Hehadtossedandturnedinabedthatsmelledofhot,smolderingsexandKara.Frustratedashell,hehadgonetohisgymandworkedout,hopingtoexhausthimself,desperatetoescapeintolatentunconsciousness.Unfortunately,hedidn’t.Instead,hehadendeduptiredanddefeated…andstillunabletosleep.
Whattimehadhefinallygiveninandpassedout?Hiseyeswenttotheclock,realizingwithshockthatitwasalmostnoon.Generallyanearlyriser,hehadneversleptthislate,evenontheweekend.Heslidoutofthebedandwentstraighttotheshower.
Heshoweredquickly,hatingthefactthathewaswashingawayherscent,andmadehiswaytothekitchen,wonderingifKarawasstillasleep.Thekitchenwasspotless,theremainsoftheirunfinisheddinnerfromlastnightgone.Hegrabbedacupoffreshlybrewedcoffeeandwalkedaroundthecondo.Herbedroomdoorwasopen,thebedmade.Obviouslyshewasup,butwhereinthehellwasshe?
Heshotupthestairs,thinkingthatmaybeshewasinhislab,playingcomputergames.
Shewasn’t.
She’snothere.
Simonfeltachillcrawlslowlydownhisspineandexperiencedabriefmomentofpanic.
Hewentbackdownthestairstwoatatime,hisheartracing.Rationally,heknewshewouldn’tleave.Shehadnoreasontogo.Theyhadbothagreedtosatisfytheirsexualurgesbyspendingjustonenighttogether.
Onenight.
Onenight,myass.Onenightwillneverbeenough.She’smine.
Simonhadknownitlastnightandheknewitnow.HewouldnevergetenoughofKara.Shewasanobsessionthathecouldn’tgetoverwithonenightofincrediblesex.Hewasn’tsurewhatitwasgoingtotake,butithadn’tbeenrelievedbyscrewingherbrainsout.Ifanything,itwasworse.Nowthathehadpossessedheronce,hewantedheragainandagain.
Thecoffeehewasdrinkingchurnedinhisgut.Truthwas,hegoddamnhatedfeelingsopossessiveofafemale.Givingashitaboutanyoneotherthanhisfamilymeanttrouble.Hadn’thelearnedthatlessonpainfullyalongtimeago?Apparentlyithadn’tstuck,becausehecaredmoreaboutKarathanhewantedto…anditscaredtheever-lovingcrapoutofhim.
Simonsnatchedhisphonefromacoffeetableinthelivingroomandsentatextmessagetoherphone.
Uok?
Hetappedhisfingeragainsttheplasticcoverofthephone,impatient.Hell,hedidn’tevenknowifshehadherphone,buthe’dbepissedifshedidn’t.Howmanytimeshadheaskedhertoalwayscarryitforherownsafety?
Asnortescapedhismouthashecarriedthephoneandhiscoffeetothekitchen.Likeshereallylistenedtohim?Shepattedhimontheheadandwentonhermerryway,doingwhateverthehellshepleased.Secretly,helovedherindependence,butitalsodrovehiminsane.Therewerejusttoomanyinstanceswhereshewasnonchalantabouthersafety
Thephonebeeped,startlingSimonenoughforhimtospillhiscoffeeontothepristinetile.Fuck,I’monedgethismorning.Cursing,hereadthereturntext.
PoliceStation.Telluaboutitlater
What.The.Fuck.Hisfingersflewashetypedanothertext.
Where?Why?
Sheansweredbriefly,givinghimthelocationofthestationandanotherinfuriatinglyvagueexplanationandapromisetotellhimaboutitlater.
Later,myass.NobodygoestothepolicestationonaSaturdaymorningforshitsandgiggles.Something’swrong.
Simonranafrustratedhandthroughhishair,nearlyyankingafewlocksfromhishead.Jesus!Atthisrate,he’dbefuckingbaldwithinaweek.Hesentherabrieftexttellingherhewasonhiswayandcrammedhiscellphoneintohispocket.Thephonebeepedagainamomentlater,butheignoredit.HealreadyknewitwasKara,probablytellinghimnottocome.
Snatchinguphiskeys,heslammedhisfeetintothenearestpairofcasualshoesandexitedthedoorofthecondo,notevenflinchingwhenitslammedviolentlybehindhim.
Karasighedsoftlyasshetookasipfromthefoamcup,hopingthecoffeewouldhelpherfocus.Swallowinghardtogetthestrong,burnt-tastingliquiddownherthroat,shelookedupatMaddiewithaweaksmile.“Ithinkwe’realmostdone.”
Shehadalreadyidentifiedthetwosuspectsfrommugshots,theangrygunmenwhohadstormedtheclinicthatmorning,demandingdrugs.Maddiehadbeeninanexamroomandhadn’tseenthemen,butKarahadgottenanupcloseandpersonallook.Grimacing,shewishedtohellthatshehadn’t.Aloneinthewaitingroom,watchingoverachildwhosesiblingandmotherwereintheexamroomwithMaddie,Karawouldprobablyneverforgetthedeadlookinthemen’seyesandtheirhaggardfacesthattoldthestoryofyearsofdrugabuse.Sheknewthelook,hadseenitofteninheryouth,butshehadn’thadaguninherfaceatthetime.Thatmoment,thatterrifyinginstanceofnotknowingwhetherthenextfewsecondswouldbeherlast,hadbeenenoughtoscarethebejesusoutofher.Shehadscoopedupthechildandracedaroundthecorner,hittingthealarmbuttonunderthedeskasshetuckedthechildbehindher.Thealarmwasn’tsilentandtheruckushadbeenenoughtobringMaddierunningoutandthementoscatter.
Oneofthemenhadatwitchytriggerfingerandhisfirearmhadexplodedatthesoundofthealarm,thepathofthebulletcomingsoclosetoKara’sheadthatshehadfelttheairrippleatthesideofherface.
Shuddering,shewrappedherarmsaroundherself,notreallycold,butrememberingwithmorethanatouchofuneasethefacesofthemenandtheirfinalbrutalcommentastheyescapedthroughtheclinicdoor.
“We’llgetyoulater,bitch!”
Maddiehadonlyseentheirexit,arrivingsecondsaftertheyhadturnedtorun.Thankfully,everyonehadescapedunharmed.
“Thenicedetectiveshouldbebacksoonandwecanaffirmthepolicereportsandgetthehelloutofhere,”Maddierespondedgrimly,hereyesfocusedonKara.“Areyousureyou’reokay?Youlookalittlepale.”
Karashrugged,tryingtolookunaffected.“Alittleshakenupisall.I’m…good.”Terrified.Scaredshitless.Butotherwise,justfine.
Thelastthingshewantedwastoalarmherfriend,knowingMaddiealreadyfeltresponsibleforKaranearlygettingshot.
Maddiereachedacrossthetableandgrabbedherhand,squeezingituntilalmostallofthebloodlefttheextremity.“Theyshotatyou.It’snormaltobeupset.Thatwasadamnclosecall.I’msosorry,Kara.”
“Maddie,itisn’tyourfault-”
“Whothehellshotather!”Abellowingmalevoicecamefromthedoor,andKaradidn’tevenhavetoturnaroundtoknowexactlywhostoodthere.SherecognizedSimon’sblusteringtoneimmediately.Themanmightnotyelloften,buthemadeupforitinquality.NoonecouldroarmoreferociouslythanSimonwhenhistemperflared.
“Whatinthefuckisgoingon?Thepolicesaidyougotattackedatsomeclinic-”
“Myclinic,”Maddieinterrupted,standingtoconfrontSimon.“Whothehellareyou?”
Uh-oh.
Karastood,readytojumpintothefight.Maddiemighthavethefaceofanangel,withfieryredcorkscrewcurlsthatsurroundedherperfectfeatures,butshecouldbeafuriousfoewhenshewantedtobe.Notthatpeoplesawthatsideofheroften.Herpatients,youngandold,adoredherandherusuallysunnypersonality.ButwhenMaddiewasfightingforacauseorsomethingshebelievedin,shecouldbeadangerousenemy.
Karawatchedasherfriendthrewbackhershoulders,herwhitephysician’scoatfloatingaroundgenerouscurvesthatcomplementedherangelicfeatures.SheforcedbackagrinasMaddiestraightenedtotrytocompensateforherfivefootthreeheight,inpreparationforbattle.
“I’mKara’s…”Simonstoppedabruptly,asthoughnotquitesurewhattosay,beforefinishinghesitantly,“friend.AndIwanttoknowwhythehellsomeoneshotather.”
“Helloooo.I’mrighthere,Simon.”Reachingoutherhand,shegrippedhisjaw,forcinghimtolookather.“Iamabletoanswerformyself.”
Hisfacetransformed,theangerdrainingfromhisfeaturesashisstill-hoteyesmethers.Reachingouttograsphershoulders,hedemanded,“Whathappened?Areyouokay?Didtheyhurtyou?”Hishandsranoverherarmsbeforelandingagainonhershoulders.
Explainingwhathappenedturnedintoanexhaustingevent.Simoninterrupted,swearinglikeasailorandaskingwhatfeltlikeamillionfreakingquestions.Karatriedtoanswerthempatientlytocalmhimdown.
Theyalltookaseatontheflimsy,uncomfortablechairsattheenormoustable.Karatalked,firstintroducingSimonandMaddie,andthengoingontoanswermorequestionsthatwereflowingfromthefuriousmaninfrontofher,almostfasterthanshecouldanswerthem.
Simoncursedthroughoutherexplanation.
AndMaddiejustwatchedwithadumbfounded,perplexedexpression.
“Didtheycatchthem?”Simonasked,hisvoicerough,asthoughhehadbeenthroughhellhimself.
“No.AndKaraneedstobecarefulsincetheythreatenedher.”Maddiefinallyjumpedin,hervoiceprotective.
“Youneglectedtomentionthat.”SimonshotKaraadarklook.
Theirconversationwasinterruptedbyaplainclothesdetective,averynice,youngishblondmanwhohadidentifiedhimselfasDetectiveHarris.HedroppedpapersinfrontofbothKaraandMaddie,askingquietly,“Canyoulookatthereportsandseeifyouhaveanythingtoadd?”HeputacasualhandonthebackofKara’schairandleanedoverhershoulder,perusingthereportwithher.
Alow,reverberatingsoundcamefromSimon’sthroatandshepulledhereyesawayfromthereporttolookathim.Buthewasn’tlookingather.HiseyeswereshootingfireatDetectiveHarris,athreateninglookthatstartledher.
Obviously,thedetectivewasn’ttheleastbitintimidated.“Boyfriend?”heaskedquietly,quietlyenoughthatSimoncouldn’tdetectthewords.
“Friend,”shemumbledback,hatingherselfforwishingshecouldconfirmthequestionwithasimple“yes”answer.
Shereadthereportquickly,withenoughhastetogetthroughitfast,butnotsorapidlythatshewasn’taccurate.Aftertheofficialpaperworkwasfinished,shestood,stretchingherbackasshegottoherfeet,feelingslightlyunsteady.
“Careful!”Thedetectivetookherarmtosteadyherslightlyswayingbody.“You’vehadatoughday,”hestatedkindly.Reachingintohispocket,hepulledouttwobusinesscardsandhandedonetobothherandMaddie.“Mycard.Callmeanytime.Mycellphonenumberisonthebackjustincaseyouneedit.”
“Isthatreallynecessary?”Simonsnarled,hisarmcurlingaroundKara’swaist,pullingherbodyagainsthimprotectively.
Thedetectiveshrugged.“Yeah.Itis.Karawasthreatened.Iwanttheseladiestobeabletoreachmeanytime.”
“Thankyou,DetectiveHarris.You’vebeenverykind.”Smilingsoftly,Karashookthedetective’shand.Maddiedidthesame,beforeallthreeofthemexitedthebuildingtogether.
Karatookadeepbreath,lettingthecrisp,refreshingairoftheoutdoorsenterherlungs.“It’sagooddaytobealive,”shemutteredtoherself,thankfultojustbeamongthelivingandhealthy.
Asthethreeofthemdescendedthestairs,approachingthesidewalk,MaddieaskedSimonquietly,“Youwouldn’thappentoberelatedtoSamHudson?Iknowthelastnameisprettycommon,butIwasjustwondering.”
Stoppingatthebottomofthestairs,SimonlookedatMaddiewithsurprise.“Yeah…he’smybrother.Whydoyouask?Doyouknowhim?”
Maddiefrowned.“Oh,God.”Sheletoutaheavybreath.“Uh…yeah…Idid.Alongtimeago.”
“Wereyoufriends?”Simonaskedcuriously,lookingatMaddieexpectantly
“No!Notreally!”Maddieansweredabruptly,herfaceturningasredasherhair.
“Ah…Isee,”Simonanswered.Notreadytoletthesubjectdrop,headded,“Badexperiencewithmybrother?”
“He’sacompleteandtotalsnake.”Maddiereacheduptorakethecurlsfromherface.Thewindwasbriskanderrantspiralswerewhippingaroundherhead.
KarajumpedasaharshbarkoflaughterescapedfromSimon’smouth.“Believeme,youaren’tthefirstwomantofeelthatway.I’msorry.”
“It’snotyourfaultthatyourbrotherisaslimyreptile.Ijusthopethetwoofyouaren’tsimilarinsomeregards,”sherepliedawkwardly.“TakecareofKara.”
“Withpleasure,Maddie,”herepliedsmoothly,reachingouthisavailablehand.“Badcircumstances,butnicetomeetyou.”
“Youtoo.Ithink,”sheansweredasshegrudginglyshookSimon’soutstretchedhand.“IknowIcan’tjudgeonebrotherbytheother,butIhateanythingthatremindsmeofSamHudson.”Shuddering,shereleasedhishandandhuggedKara.“Takecareofyourself.I’llcallyou.Don’tdoanythingstupid,”shewarnedKarafiercelyinawhisperlowenoughthatonlyKaracouldcatchheradamantadvice.
KarathrewherselfintoMaddie’sarmsandhuggedhertightly,wellawareofthedangerthatbothsheandherfriendhadbeeninandhoweasilythingscouldhaveturnedoutdifferently.ShelovedMaddietodeath.Althoughshecouldbepricklyontheoutsideattimes,herfriendwasacompletemarshmallowontheinside.“Youtoo.I’lltalktoyousoon.”
Simonreclaimedher,slippinghisarmaroundherwaistandleadinghertohiscarasMaddiecrossedtheparkinglottoherownvehicle.
God,whatahorribleday.
Tired,shaken,hermindontheeventsoftheday,shedidn’tevenbalkasSimonledhertohisridiculouslyexpensiveVeyronandseatedherinthepassengersidebeforeclimbingbehindthewheelhimself.
Theywerebothsilent,lostintheirownthoughts,astheymadethejourneyhome.
Simondidn’ttakethemstraightbacktothecondo.Hepulledintoaparkinglotclosetohomeandwhippedthesmallsportscarintoavacantparkingspace.
“Weneedtoeat.ThisplacehasthebestItalianfoodinthearea,butit’snothingfancy.”Hehoppedoutandjoggedtotheothersideofthecar,openingherdoorandtakingherhandtopullheroutofthevehicle.
“Uh…I’mnotexactlydressedforfancy.”Stillinherjeansandsweaterthatsheworefortheclinic,sheknewthatshewasamess.Bothphysicallyandemotionally.
“Youlookbeautiful.ButIknowit’sbeenatoughday.Isthatokay?”
“It’sgreat.IloveItalianandI’mstarving.”
Surprisinglyenough,whatshetoldhimwastrue.Shehadskippedbreakfastbecauseshehadgottenuplate,andlunchhadcomeandgonewhiletheywereatthepolicestation.
Simonheldthedoorforher,guidingherthroughitwithahandatthesmallofherback.God,themanhadgreatmanners.She’dhavetoremembertocomplimentHelenlaterforraisinghersontobepolite.Karacouldn’trememberthelasttimeaguyhadactuallyruntoopenherdoor.Probably…never.
Theinterioroftherestaurantwasdim,eachtablelightedwithalarge,fatcandleinthemiddle.Itwasn’tfancy,butitwasn’texactlyadiveeither
“Mr.Hudson.Howlovelytoseeyouagain.”Theleggy,beautifulblondewhogreetedthemshowedthemtoacornertable,gracingSimonwithasmilestraightfromatoothpastecommercial.
Aftertheywereseated,SimonorderedabeerontapandKaraaskedforanicedtea.Shebreathedasighofreliefwhenthefawningfemalefinallylefttogettheirdrinks.
“Flirtywoman.”Karawantedtobitehertongueimmediately.WhatbusinesswasitofhersifawomanflirtedwithSimon?Maybehelikedit.
“YoumeanKate?”Simon’sexpressionwaspuzzledasheclosedhismenu,obviouslyalreadydecidedonwhathewanted.
“Isthathername?Shedidn’tintroduceherselftome.Sheseemedmuchmoreinterestedinyou.”Shutthehellup,Kara.Yousoundlikeajealousgirlfriend.
“Shewasn’tflirting.I’maregularcustomer.Shehastobenice.”Simonshrugged.
OhLord,themanwasclueless.Shestudiedthemenu,tryingtoletthesubjectdrop.“You’vebeenherebefore.Anyrecommendations?”
“It’sallgood.I’mhavingthechickenparmesan.”
Karalookedatthemenulikeakidinacandystore.Ithadbeensolongsinceshe’dhadsomanychoicesoreateninarestaurantasanactualcustomer.“It’ssohardtodecide.”
Simonwasgrinningwhenshefinallylookedupfromthemenu.“Youlooklikeyou’retryingtosolveamajorproblem.”
“DoIlooklikeIdon’tgetoutmuch?”sheaskedwithalight,self-mockinglaugh.
Hiseyesgrewstormyasheshotheralooksointense,shecouldfeelheatwashovereveryinchofherbody.“YouaretheloveliestwomanI’veeverseensittingacrossatablefromme.Nooneelseevencomesclose.”
Sheblushed,actuallyflushingrose-redfromtheI-want-to-fuck-youlookinhiseyesandtheheatofhisgaze.NomancoulddrivehercrazylikeSimondid.Oneword,onestatement,onelook…andshewasflusteredlikeafreakingteenagegirl.
Karawasactuallygratefultoseeanolder,dark-hairedwaitresscomingtodelivertheirdrinksandtaketheirfoodorder.ShedecidedtomakethingseasyandhavethesamethingSimonwashaving.Asthewaitressleft,Karapickedupherdrink,puzzled.“Ithinktheymademeanalcoholicicedtea.”
Simonchuckledasheglancedatthebeverageinherhand.“It’sdefinitelyanalcoholicicedtea.Ididn’tknowyouwantedtherealthing.”
“What’sinthis?”sheasked,staringattheglassofliquidthatwasactuallyprettyclosetothesamecolorasconventionalicedtea,butitwasinastoutdrinkglassandtoppedwithacherry.Noneoftherestaurantswhereshehadworkedwereequippedwithafullbarandshewasn’treallyanexpertondrinks.
Simongrinnedwickedly.“Rum,gin,tequila,vodka,triplesec…andasplashofcolaandsourmix.”
Oh,crap.She’dbedoingahappydanceonthetable.Aglassofwinemadehertipsy.Holdingheralcoholwellwasn’tatalentshehadeverperfected,probablybecausesheseldomimbibed.“Promiseyouwon’tletmedancenakedonthetablewhenI’mdone.”ShecockedabrowatSimon,waitingforhisagreement.
Sheglaredathimasheburstintoafullbellylaugh,gaspingforbreathasheanswered,“Seriously?Fromadrinkortwo?”
“It’snotfunny.Idon’tdrinkmuch,”shetoldhimdefensively,suddenlyfeelingprettydamnunworldlyandoutofplacesittingacrossfromabillionairewhohadbeenaroundtheblockatimeortwo.Orthree.
Simongrinnedather.“Iknow.Tryit.Ifyoudon’tlikeit,I’llgetyousomethingelse.”Hisexpressionsobered,hiseyesalightwithheatandsomethingelsethatshecouldn’tquitedefine.“AndIdefinitelypromisethatyouwillnotdancenakedonthetable,unlessit’sathomeinaprivateperformance.”Hisvoicewasgruff,hisexpressionheated,asthoughhewereimaginingexactlythatscenarioandwaslookingforwardtoit.
Sherefusedtomeethiseyes,thelumpinherthroatfeelingasbigasabaseball.Hell,whynot?Shecoulduseadrinkafterthemorningshehadjustbeenthrough.Sippingcautiously,shelettheliquidflowoverhertongueanddownherthroat,swallowinghardtogetbytheknotthathadformedfromSimon’ssexycomment.“Notbad.”Shelickedherlips.“Itdoesn’treallytasteallthatstrong.”
Heshotherawickedsmile.“It’sdeceiving.They’reprettypotent.”
Theyenjoyedtheirdrinksanddinnerwithcompanionableconversation.Simontalkedabouthisfamilyandtoldheraboutsomeofhisprojects.Karasharedfunnystoriesfromhercareerasawaitress,andafewfromheryearsinnursingschool.
Simondestroyedhisentireplateofchickenparmesanandfinishedherswhenshecouldn’teatanotherbite.Heorderedthemeachatiramisuandaseconddrink.Thedessertwasdelicious,butshecouldn’tfinishit.Ofcourse,hewaswillingtopolishthatoffforher,too.Themancouldputawayalotoffood.Maybeheneededittofuelthatbig,sinewy,sculptedbodythatneverfailedtoleaveherpantinglikeadogafteratemptingtreat.
“Howdoyoumaintainsuchanincrediblebodywhenyoueatlikethat?”sheaskedhim,wantingtokickherselfforwordingitquitethatway,knowingthatitwasthealcoholthatwastwistingherwords.
Notetoself:Donotdrinkmorethanawatereddownglassofwinefromnowon.
Hiseyesshottoherface,hisexpressionmischievous.“Incredible,huh?”
Sheshrugged.Whatwasthepointindenyingit?Hisbodywasincredible.“Well,itis.”Incredible.Rock-hardandsexyashell.Thehottestbodyontheplanet.
“Iworkoutinthegymathomeeveryday.IfyouthinkIlookgood,Iguessit’sworthit,”hisincredulousvoiceinformedher.
Oh,hellyeah.Wayworthit.
“Itshows,”shechokedout,tryingnottobeobviousaboutthefactthatshewantedtojumphisbonesinaboutahundreddifferentways.“It’soneofthereasonsthatwomenlikeKatefallalloveryou.Nottheonlyreason,butoneofthem.”Oh,shit.Hadshereallysaidthatoutloud?Damnalcohol!Sheneededtobitehertongue.
“Womendon’tadmiremybody,mypersonality,oranythingelseaboutmeexceptmymoney,”Simontoldherinamatter-of-facttone.
Karalookedathim,flabbergasted.Didhereallybelievethat?“Oh,soitdoesn’tmatterthatyou’reinsanelyhandsome,agenius,funny,andextremelykind?Womenjustwantthecash?”God,hereallywasinfuriating.Didn’theknow?Didn’therealizethathehadsomuchmoretoofferthanjusthismoney?
“Yes.”
Herheartached,knowingthathereallydidthinkthatmoneywashisonlyasset.Hardtobelieve,especiallywhenshehadbeenonthereceivingendofhisgenerousnaturesomanytimes.Alsodifficulttocomprehendassheglancedyearninglyacrossthetableatthemosthandsome,desirablemanshehadeverlaideyeson.“Ido.”Helookedatherwithabewilderedexpressionasthewordsslippedfromhermouthinaheatedrush.“Iwantyou.Andithasnothingtodowithyourmoney.”Thewordsspilledfromherlipswithoutpause,uncensored.Shelookedawayfromhim,slightlymortifiedatwhatshehadrevealed,buthisconstantrefusaltorealizehisownvaluemadeherinsane.“Idon’tgiveashitaboutyourmoney.”
“Yeah…Inoticedthat,”hesaidinagraveledvoice.
Finally,shelookedupathimandhisexpressionwasunreadable.Confusion?Disbelief?Distrust?Hope?Theywereallthere,butshehadahardtimefiguringoutwhichonetookpriority.
Shetippedupherglass,finishingthelastofhersecondicedtea.“I’mdone.”Ifshehadanotherdrink,she’dbestrippingoffherclothesandbegginghimtotakeher.Rightnow.
Karawonderedifshewouldregretherspontaneousoutburstlater,anddecidedshemostlikelywouldn’t.Somehow,sheneededtogetthroughtoSimon,evenifitwasuncomfortablyhumbling.Hewassoself-contained,socontrolled,buttherewasanunderlyingvulnerabilitylurkingbeneaththesurface.Thatself-doubtthatsheoccasionallyspottedinthosegorgeouseyesshouldneverlingerthere.Nomanashandsome,kind,andgenerousshouldeverknowamomentofuncertainty.
Simonwas,withoutquestion,analphamale,butshehadtoquestionifhisneedtohaveawomanhelplessandblindfoldedduringsexwasadominationissue.Certainly,thattypeofdominationwaserotic,sohotthatshecreamedherpantieseverytimeshethoughtbacktothenightbefore,butshehatedtothinkthatSimonwasconstrainedtoonlyonetypeofsexbecauseofdistrust.Unfortunately,thatwashersuspicion.Gutinstinctwasclawingatherinsides,tellingherthathisissuehadnothingtodowithdominationandeverythingtodowithsometypeoftrustissue.
TheystoodandSimonpulledouthiswallet,droppingsomecashontopofthecheck.Shesighedashegraspedherhandtightly,tugginghergentlythroughthedoor.Itwasearlyeveningandthecoolerairhelpedclearherfoggyhead.Shecouldn’tremembereveryoneoftheingredientsinthedrinks,buttheyhadcertainlyloosenedhertongue.
Thedrivebacktothecondowasonlyafewblocks,butitleftKarasquirminginherseat.Simonwastoocloseandsmelledwaytootempting,andshewasstillembarrassedaboutthefactthatshehadbasicallyspilledhersoultohim.Oh,maybenoteverything,butadmittinghowmuchshewantedhimandgettingnorealresponsewasprettydeflating.
WhatdidIwanthimtosay?Iwanttohelphimandthatmeansexpectingnothingback.Heneverpromisedanythingexceptformind-blowingsex.Andhegavemethat.Inspades!
Really,shehadn’texpectedanything,buthavinghimsaythathewantedhertoowouldhavebeennice.Shefeltraw,exposed.Andbeinginhiscompanywasanythingbutcomfortableatthemoment.
Idon’tunderstandhim.Idon’tknowwhatmotivateshisbehavior.
Butshewantedto.TherewasnothingshewantedmorethantounderstandeveryoneofSimonHudson’ssecrets.
Shebreathedasighofreliefastheyenteredthecondo.Wanderingthroughthekitchen,sheheadedforherroomtotakeashower.ShewasabouttocallabriefgoodnighttoSimonwhenalarge,musculararmwrappedaroundherwaist,pullingheragainstanequallylarge,masculinebody.
“Don’tgo.Notyet.”Simon’shuskyvoiceagainstherearsentashiverofneedthroughherbody,momentarilystunningherintosilence.
Heliftedher,cradlingheragainsthischestashestrodeintothelivingroomandsatonthecouch,herbodysprawledonhislap.“What’swrong?”shequestionedsoftly,feelingtherestlesstensioninhisbody.Hismuscleswerebunchedtightlyasshefannedherhandsoverhisshoulders.
“Ineedtoholdyouforawhile.Please.Youtooktwentyyearsoffmylifetoday,Kara.I’mgoingtoendupold,bald,andcrazyifyoukeephavingincidentslikethis.”Hewrappedhisarmsaroundher,plasteringherbodytightlyagainsthis.
“I’msorry.”Shelaidherheadonhisshoulder,relishingtheabrasivefeelofhiswhiskersagainsthercheek,tryingnottoletherspiritssoarbecausehewashintingatafutureforthem.
“Ican’ttakeit.Ican’tstandthethoughtofanythinghappeningtoyou,”hesaidinastrangledvoice.
Thelivingroomwasdim,litonlybyresiduallightfromthekitchen.Herheartracedasshepulledbacktostrokehisroughjaw.Hewasafraidforhersafety.Shecouldn’thelpbutbetouchedbyit.Therehadbeenveryfewpeopleinherlifewhohadreallycaredaboutherinthatway,andcertainlyneveramale,exceptforherfather.Herexprobablywouldhaveshruggeditoffandtoldherthatitwasherownfaultforvolunteeringinthatpartofthecity.Hehadn’texactlybeenthenurturingtype.
Capturingherhand,hedrewittohislips,droppinglight,softkissestoherpalm.“Ihadaveryhardtimenotgoingforyourcop’sthroattoday.”
“Why?”
“ForGod’ssake,Kara,themanwaseye-fuckingyourightthereinthestation.”Hisanswerwasharsh.
“Hewasjustbeingnice-”
“Hewasimaginingwhatitwouldbeliketofuckyou,”heinformedherinaraspyvoice.“I’maguy.Believeme.Iknow.AndIfuckinghatedit.Idon’tliketoshare.”
Gulp.Washeinsinuatingthat…
“Ididn’tknowthatIwasyours.”Wasshe?
“Youarenow.”
“Sincewhen?”
“ProbablysincethefirstmomentIsawyou.DefinitelysincethemomentItouchedyou.Andabsolutelysincelastnight.”Hishandmovedtothebackofherneck,guidinghermouthtohis.
Heflippedherinonesmoothmotion,hismouthneverleavinghers.Onemomentshewasonhislap,andthenext,shewasspreadoutonthemassivesofabeneathhim.Hekissedheruntilshecouldn’tbreathe,couldn’tthink;shecouldonlyfeel.Legspartingtoaccepthisbody,shewrappedherarmsaroundhismuscularback,tryingtogetasclosetohimasshepossiblycould.
Sheneededthis,neededhim.Sheslidhertonguealonghis,desperatetogetcloser,wantingtocrawlinsidehim.Herhipsshiftedlonginglyagainsthisgroin,whimperingintohismouthwhenshefelttheharderectionstrainingagainsthisjeans,pushingagainsthermound,makinghercrazytofeelhiminsideher.
Pullinghermouthawayfromhisshegasped,“Ineedyoutofuckme,Simon.Please.”
Heburiedhisfaceinherneckwithagutturalsound.“Bedroom.”
“No.Here.Now.Rightnow,”shepanted.Shedidn’twanttomove,didn’twanttobeblindfoldedandtiedthistime.Wrappingherlegsaroundhiswaistinsilententreaty,shebroughtherhandstohisass,pullinghimagainstherassheundulatedherhips.“Fuck!Ican’tthinkwhenyoudothat.Idon’twanttowait,”herasped,hishandsslidingbeneathherass,pullinghertightlyagainsthisragingerectionwithalow,tormentedgroan.
“Don’twait.Please.”Herbodywasignitingliketinderonaragingforestfire.
“YouknowIcan’t.”Hisvoicewasangryandfrustrated,buthedidn’treleasehisholdonherass.
“Youcan.”Shewantedhimlikethis,spontaneousandneedy.Unwrappingherlegsfromhiswaist,shebuckedandslippedherhandsbetweentheirbodies,unsnappingherjeansandrippingatthezippertogetthemundone.Shewriggled,makingSimonliftupwhilesheloweredherjeansandpantiesenoughtokickthemoffherlegs.“Touchme.”
Simongroanedashishandslippedbetweenthem,hisfingersslidingintoherdrenchedpussy.“OhJesus,you’resofuckingwet.”
“Foryou,”sheansweredfiercely.“Sodon’ttellmethatnowomanwantsyouforanythingotherthanyourmoney.IwantyousodamndesperatelythatI’mbeggingyoutofuckme,”shetoldhimfuriously,tryingtomakehimunderstandthatwhatshefeltwasfarfrommonetary.
Shecouldn’ttellhimthedepthsofherneed.Shewasn’treadytostriphersoulandSimonwasn’treadytohearit.Andmaybeshewasn’treadytodealwithit.But,damnit,he’dtakethis.He’dtakeher.Now.
Herbodyshudderedashisfingersglidedthroughhertender,wetflesh,zeroinginonherthrobbingclit.“Yes.Touchme.”Shewaslost,herbodyreactingtoeverysensation,everybrushofhisfingers.Herheadtossedwildlyassheabandonedherselftohisbold,undauntedstroking.
“You’resohot.Sodamnresponsive.It’ssohardtobelievethatyouwantmelikethis.Tellme.Again,”hedemanded,hisstrokesbecomingharder,moredemanding.
“Ineedyou,Simon.Fuckme.”
“Onlyme?”
“Onlyyou.You’retheonlyonewhomakesmefeellikethis.”Andhewastheonlymanwhocouldmakeherthiscrazywithasimpletouch.Sheknewitwasaweakness,butatthemoment,shecouldn’tbringherselftocare.
Herearedupandtoreopenhisjeans,yankingthemdownuntilhiscockwasliberated,springingoutthrobbing,hardandneedy.“Iwantyousofuckingmuch,Kara,butI’mnotsureIcandothis.”Hisvoicewasbothpassionateandangry.
Sherecognizedhisneedtodominate.Thecausewasn’tclear,butsheknewheneededtobeincontrol.“Holdmyhands,Simon.Takecontrol.Fuckmehowyouneedto.Idon’tcare,aslongasyoudoitnow.”
Shewantedtograspthatbeautifulcockandputitwhereshemostneededit,butreachedherhandsupandgraspedbothofhis.Bothofhishandswereclenchedinatightfist,buttheyopenedslowlyandwrappedaroundhers.Heentwinedtheirfingersandloweredtheirjoinedhandsoverherhead.
“Yes.Youhavecontrol.I’mexactlywhereyouwantme.Nowtakeme,”shepleaded,needinghimtotakeherthisway.Shehadenjoyedlastnight,butshewantedhimtobindherandblindfoldherbecauseitwaseroticandsexy,notbecauseheneededto.Instinctively,sheknewitwascriticalthathelearntotrustinsmallsteps,makeloveinsteadofjustfuck.
Nearlyreadytoweepasheloweredhispowerfulbodyoverhers,shemoanedatthefeelofhiscockpoisedagainsthertightopening.Sheswirledherhipsuntiltheywereinposition.
Andthen,miraculously,heenteredherwithonestrongthrust.
Shehissedashiscockslammedintoher,stretchedher,possessedhercompletely.“Yes.Youfeelsogood.”Shewrappedherlegsaroundhim,wantingtosavorthefeelofhim.
“Shit.You’resowet.Nothingbetweenyouandmycock.There’snofuckingbetterfeelingthanthis,”Simonpantedagainstherneck,hischestheavingagainstherbreasts,abradingherswollennipples.
Handsentwined,hisfingerssqueezinghersuntiltheywerenearlynumb,Simonpumpedhishipsassheansweredhimbygrindingupagainsthim,meetinghimhalfway.
HerheartachedasherbodyjoinedagainandagainwithSimon’s,knowingthatthismomentwaspivotal,extraordinaryandspecial.
Herheelsdugintohisrock-hardass,urginghimdeeper,faster.Hisstrokesbecamepowerful,forceful.Inandout.Overandover.
Hismouthcoveredhers,hiskissalmostviolentasheravagedhermouth,owningit,ashisvelvet-softtonguesweptthrougheveryinchofhermouth,thrustinginthesamerhythmashiscock.
Overwhelmedbyhisstrength,absorbedinthecadenceofpummelingcockandthrustingtongue,KaralostherselfinSimon.Completely.Utterly.Willingly.
Tearsrolleddownhercheeksasshewhimperedintohismouth,herbodytrembling,pulsating,inthemostincredibleclimaxshehadeverexperienced.
Herchannelclenched,herfleshtighteningandreleasingaroundSimon’scockashepoundedinandoutofherbodywithfuriousabandon.
Hegroanedintohermouth,entwininghismaraudingtonguewithhers,asheburiedhimselfonelasttimedeepinsideher,hisbigbodytremblingaboveherashecame,floodingherwombwithheat.
Dragginghismouthawayfromherlips,hisfacefellagainstherneck.“Holyfuck.Holyfuck.Holyfuck,”hechantedbreathlesslyagainstherskin.
Sheyankedonherhands,needingthereturnofherbloodcirculation.Shefreedherselfandwrappedherarmsaroundhim,threadingherhandsthroughhissweat-soakedhair,cradlinghisheadagainstherneck.Hisweightwasheavyontopofher,hisbodyrelaxedandsated,butshewasn’treadyforhimtomove
“IthinkIjustdied,”hehuffed,stillbreathinghard.
“IguessImustbedeadrightalongwithyouthen.Iwasthere,”sheansweredwithagasp,herhandsstillsiftingthroughhishair.
Later,shewouldwonderhowlongsheandSimonhadlaidthereinaworldoftheirown,stunnedandastonishedbywhathadoccurred,butatthatmomentshejustabsorbedthepeacethatcameaftertheturbulentstorm.
Afteranunknownamountoftime,Simonrolledoffher.“I’mheavy.I’msorry.”
Curlingintohisside,shesighedheavily.“Itwasfine.”
“Itwasbeyondfine,”hegrowled,playfullyandintentionallymisunderstandingher.
“Thankyou,Simon,”shewhisperedsoftly.
“Forwhat?”heasked,puzzled,ashewrappedonearmaroundherprotectivelyandstrokedthehairfromherfacewithanother.
“Forwhatjusthappened.”Fortrustingme.Forlettinggoofafewghosts.ForgivingmewhatIneeded.Forgivingyourselfwhatyouneeded.
Shecouldn’tseehisface,butshedidn’tneedto.Shecouldhearthegrininhisvoice.“Sweetheart,don’tthankme.Ishouldbeworshippingatyourfeet.”
“Ah…well…ifyoumust…goahead.”Sheansweredlikeaqueenaddressingoneofhersubjects,tryingtolightenthemood.
Smallsteps
Hesnorted.“Can’trightnow.Youworemeout.”
“Ungratefulcad.”Sheswattedhisshoulderwithasmile.
“Idon’tneedtobeatyourfeet.Ialreadyworshipyou,”hewhisperedgentlyashislipsbrushedoverhersandhereleasedhertotuckhimselfbackintohisjeans.
Shesatup,gropingforherownjeansandpanties.“Yeah,yeah…menwillsayanythingafteradecentorgasm.”Denimbrushedherfingersandshehoppedup,quicklypullingthepantiesandjeansoverherhips.
Simonsnaggedherhipsassheturnedtoleave.“Itwasalotmorethanagoodfuck.Youwerecrying.Justtellmeiftheyweregoodtearsorbadtears,”heasked,hisvoicewarmwithconcern.
“Good.Definitelygood.”Unwillingtosayanythingmore,shebrushedherlipsagainsthisandforcedherselftowalkaway.SheknewhowSimonfeltaboutsleepingwithsomeone.She’dhavetobecontentwithwhathadjusthappenedfornow.“Ineedtoshower.Someonemademeall…wet.”
Laughingatthelowgrowlsheheardbehindher,sheslippedawaytoherownroomtoshowerandcrawlintobed,fallingintoanexhaustedbutcontentedsleep.
Everythingok?
KarasmileddownatthetextmessagefromSimonasJamesdrovesedatelytowardHelen’sPlace.Shehadn’ttalkedtoHeleninseveraldaysandtheyhadmadearrangementstohavecoffee.SinceHelencouldn’tstandtotearherselfawayfromtherestaurant,Karausuallypoppedinafterschoolduringtheslowerhourstochat.
Shesentareturntext.YesDaddy.All’swell.
ItwasFriday,almostaweeksincetheincidentattheclinic.Simoncheckedinwithhereveryday,usuallyseveraltimesaday,tomakesureeverythingwasokay.Shemightjokewithhimaboutbeinglikeanoverprotectivefather,butshesecretlyfoundittouchingthathecaredabouthersafety.
Theyhadn’tgottenphysicalsincethenightoftheincidentattheclinic.Theyjoked,theytalked,buttheydidn’tscrew.Itwasalmostasiftheywerebothafraidthatwhathappenedcouldn’tberepeated.Ormaybeithadjustscaredtheshitoutofbothofthem.Ithadcertainlyfrightenedthehelloutofher.Shehadneverexperiencedanythingquitethatintense.
Herphonebeepedagain.
Becareful.Letmeknowwhenuleave.RUthereyet?
Shereplied.Pullingupnow.Willobeyorders,sir.
ThecarpulledinfrontofHelen’srestaurantasherphonebeepedagain.
Iwish.Onlyinmydreamsdoyoueverobeyorders.
Shesnickeredassheputthephoneinherfrontpocket,almostabletohearSimonspeakingthosewordsoutloudinadisgruntledvoice.“Thankyou,James.I’llseeyouinalittlebit.”Shesmiledatthekind,elderlymanasshereachedforthedoorhandle.
Hegrinnedbroadlyather.“Haveanicevisit,Ms.Kara.I’llbeherewaitingforyou.GiveHelenmybest.”
Jameshadworkedforthefamilyforseveralyearsandkneweveryone.
“Willdo.”Sheslidfromthevehicle,liftingherhandinawavetoJamesasshereachedthedoor.
Evenduringtheslowerhours,Helen’sPlacewasn’tlackingcustomers.Theplacewaswellknownintheareaforhavingreasonablepricesandgreatfood.KaramadeherwaytoacornerboothandwasabouttoseatherselfwhenHelencamerushingfromthebackdoors,awidesmileonherfaceandherarmsopenwide.
Karahuggedtheolderwomanfiercelyasshearrivedbesidethebooth,breathingdeeply,takinginthewelcomingscentofvanillathatalwaysseemedtoradiatefromHelen.
HelenpulledbackandgraspedKarabytheshoulders.“Howismysontreatingyou?Youlookgood.Rested.”
“Letmegetussomecoffee.”Karawentbehindthecounterandsnatchedtwomugs,fillingthemwithsteamingcoffee,beforemakingherwaybacktothetable,grabbingabowlofcreameronherway.“I’mdoingwell.Classesaregood.It’sgettingtocrunchtime.”SheslidamuginfrontofHelenbeforeseatingherselfinfrontofherown.
“Honey,youdon’thavetoservecoffee.Youaren’tanemployeeanymore.”Helenshotheragrin,onesosimilartoSimon’sthatKarawasmomentarilydistracted.
Leaningback,shestudiedHelenforamoment,tryingtofindothersimilaritiestoSimon.Therereallyweren’tmany.Afterviewingtonsofphotosofthetwobrotherswiththeirmother,KarahadcometotheconclusionthatSimonmusttakeafterhisdad,eventhoughshehadneverseenaphotoofhisfather.HelenlookedlikeSam,withhershort,wavy,blondehairandgreeneyes.Herfriendhadalwaysdressedwithcasualelegance.Today,itwasapaisleycalf-lengthskirtwithabutton-downpinksweater.Large,pink,danglingearringsfellfromherdelicateears,bumpingagainstthesideofherneckeverytimeshemovedherhead.Helen’sratherflamboyantearringsweretheonlyostentatiousthingabouther.Shewasatrulykind,gentlesoul.
Karasmiled.“Ineedmycaffeinefix.”Shedumpedliquidcreamerintothesteamingbrew.“Ijustgotyousomeatthesametime.”Sheaddedsugarandpickedupherspoontostirthemixture.“AndSimonistreatingmefine.Morethanfine.He’sawonderful…friend.”Karanearlychokedonthelastword.Well,Simonwasafriend.
Helensighed.“Hesoundshappy.Italktohimalmosteveryday.Ihaven’theardhimsoupbeatinalongtime.Hesoundscompletelysmitten.”
“He’snot,”Karaansweredquickly,nearlychokingonasipofcoffee.“We’renot.Imean,we’refriends.”God,shecouldn’tleadHelentobelievetherewasanythingpermanentinherrelationshipwithSimon.
“Uhhuh.AndSimontalksaboutyoueveryday,nonstopforanhourbecause…why?”Helenshotherateasinglookovertherimofhermug.
Karashrugged.Hedid?Really?“Iliveinhishome.He’shelpingme.It’sonlynaturalthathetalksaboutaroommate.Weseeeachothereveryday.”
Helensnorted.“Sweetie,heandSamseeeachothereveryday,too,andhecertainlydoesn’trambleonabouthisbrother.Andhe’snevertalkedaboutawomanbefore.”
Karatriedtogetherhopefulheartundercontrol.JustbecauseSimonmentionedherinhisconversationswithhismomdidn’tmeananything.“HeandSamdon’tliveinthesamehome.”
“Youlikehim.Andhelikesyou.Alot.”
Hershouldersslumpedasshesethermugbackonthetableandtoyedwithanapkin.ShehadneverbeenabletohidemuchfromHelen.“Ido.Ijustdon’twanttoexpecttoomuch.Simonisn’tintocommitments.Igetthat.”Sortof.“He’sneverevenhadasteadygirlfriend.”
Helenreachedoutherhand,restingitoverthefingersthatKarawasusingtoslowlyripupapapernapkin.“Itdoesn’tmeanthathecan’torwon’t.”Helenletoutaheavybreath.“SomethinghappenedtoSimonwhenhewassixteenandhe’sneverbeenthesame,Kara.He’salwaysbeenquiet,myintelligentlittleboywithhisfacefirmlyplantedinabookandasstudiousasanyparentcouldeverwishfor.Buthewasalsohumane,thetypeofchildthatwouldrescueanystray.IrememberhowbadlySamusedtoteasehimabouthisbleedingheart.TherewashardlyadaythatwentbythatSimonwasn’tdragginghomealostanimalortryingtorightsomewrong.”Helensquirmeduncomfortablyonthebenchseat.“ButIthinkhelostthatwhenhewassixteen.”
KarasqueezedHelen’shand.“Hedidn’tloseit.It’sstillthere.Lookathowhe’shelpingme.Iknowsomethinghappened.Idon’tknowthespecifics,Helen,buthe’sstillaskindashe’salwaysbeen.”
“That’sjustit.Hewasn’tbeforehemetyou.You’rethefirstpersonoutsidethefamilywhohe’scaredaboutinawholelotofyears.Itgivesmehope.”
Karaflinched.“Please,don’tgetyourhopesup.We’refriends.That’sit.Justconsidermeastraythathe’srescuing.”
Helenbeamedasshepulledherhandawayandgraspedhercoffeemug,shootingKaraaknowinglook.“Yeah,well,thenyou’rethefirststrayhe’stakeninforaboutsixteenyears.I’dsaythat’skindofsignificant.”
Karadidthemath,herheartpumping.Ofcourse,theparty.Simon’sturningthirty-twotomorrow.
“I’msurethat’snottrue.Heprobablyjustdidn’ttellyou.”Certainly,shecouldn’tbethefirstpersonhehadhelpedsincetheunknownincidentthathadchangedhimattheageofsixteen.
Helenlaughedandsaidcryptically,“I’mhismother.Ihaveeyesinthebackofmyhead.Askmyboys.ItirritatesthehelloutofthemthatIknowthingsevenwhentheyhaven’ttoldme.”
DoyouknowthatSimoncanonlyhavesexwithwomenifthey’reblindfoldedandtied?KarawasprettysurethatHelenwasn’tprivytothatinformation,andshesureashellwasn’ttellingher.Therewerejustsomethingsthatmothersshouldn’tknow.Still,shewonderedaboutSimon’ssupposedyearsofisolation,ofcontaininghisrescuertendencies.ItmadeherchesttighttothinkaboutwhathadhappenedtoSimon,whathadchangedhimfromthatsweetyoungboytoanisolated,detachedadult.
Washereallychanging?Hewasaloofattimes,andalittlebitinsular,butKaradidn’tthinkshecouldeverimaginehimasuncaringorcompletelysolitary.Thereweresomethingsthatwerejust…Simon.
Gruff…check.
Cranky…check.
Bossy…check.
Controlling…sometimes.
Kind…definitelycheck!Beneathhisroughexterior,hehadaverygoodheart.
Sexy…check,check,check.
Hewasalsowitty,smart,andcompletelyirresistibleinmorewaysthanshecouldcount.
“Hopefully,he’lltellmewhathappenedsomeday,”Karawhisperedtoherself.
“Ihopehedoes.Heneedstotalkaboutitandleaveitinthepast,”Helenrepliedquietly.
Oh,hell.Simon’smotherhadheardhercomment.Inadditiontoeyesinthebackofherhead,Helenmustalsohavesupersonichearing.
“Doyouknowwhathappened?”Karaaskedherfriendcuriously.
Lookinguncomfortable,Helenreplied,“Iknowtheevent.Henearlydied.ButIdon’tthinkIknoweverything.”Helen’sexpressionwasgrim.
“It’sapainfulmemoryforyou.I’msorry.”Karavowedtonevertakeherfrienddownthisroadagain.Shehatedseeingthewomanwhowaslikeasecondmothertoherlookingsoforlorn.
“Therearealotofmemoriesinthedistantpastthatarepainful.Ican’talwaysavoidthem.Myboyswentthroughachildhoodthattheynevershouldhavehad.Thatnochildshouldeverexperience.Ishouldhavedonemore,protectedthembetter.”Helen’seyeswerefilledwithpain,asthoughrememberingthatpainfulpastandthetollithadtakenonthemall.
“Stop.Rightnow.SimonandSambothturnedoutfine.They’resonstobeproudof,Helen.Youdidyourbestanditshows.”KarahatedthatmournfulexpressiononHelen’sface.“Youdon’thavetohaveaperfectchildhoodtogrowintoaterrificadult.Lookatme.”Shesmiledbroadly,tryingtocheerHelenupwithhumor.
Helensmiledweakly.“SometimesIforgethowhardyou’vehadit,sweetie.Yourparentsleftyoualonetooyoung,buttheyraisedyouright.”
“Andyouraisedyourboysright.Idon’tknowSam,butIdoknowSimon.He’sawonderfulman,”Karatoldherfriendhonestly.HopingtochangethesubjectandseeHelensmileagain,shewasdeterminedtochangethetopic.NogoodcouldcomeoutofHelenwishingthatshehadraisedherchildrendifferently.KaraknewHelen,andthatherfriendhaddoneherbesttoraisehertwoboys,whateverthecircumstancesmighthavebeen.“SimoninvitedmetoSam’spartytomorrow.”
Helenlaughed.“Simon’sannualbirthdaybash,hostedbynoneotherthanhisbrother,Sam.Youaregoingtogo,aren’tyou?”
“Yep.Simonwantsmetogo.Aretheregoingtobealotofpeoplethere?”Karacouldn’tkeeptheapprehensionfromhervoice.HowintheworldwasshegoingtoblendinwithabunchofwealthyguestsatSimon’sbirthdayparty?
ShehadbeensurprisedwhenSimonaskedherattendtheevent.Notonlyhadshenotknownthathehadabirthdaycomingup,butherownbirthdaywasthedayafterSimon’s.
“Areyounervous?”Helenliftedherbrow,givingKaraaninquiringlook.
Damn.WasthereanythingthatHelencouldn’tgetoutofher?“Alittle.It’snotexactlyacrowdthatI’musedtominglingwith.”Thatwasanunderstatement.Thingsdoneforpleasureorrelaxationweren’teventssheattendedatall.Betweenworkandschool,shehadneverhadthetime.
Helen’sdelightedchortlefilledtheairaroundthem.“OnethingI’velearnedovertheyearsisthatrichpeoplearen’treallythatmuchdifferentthannormalfolks.Somearenice.Somearenotsonice.You’llbefine.Havingmoneydoesn’tmakeanyofthembetterthanyouare,sweetie.”
Rationally,Karaknewthat.Still,shewasnervous.Heranxietywasn’tcausedsomuchbythewealthastheideathatshedidn’twanttodisappointSimoninfrontofhisfriends,businessacquaintances,andfamily.Hersocialskillsweresadlylackingfromyearsofneglect,heronlypracticehercustomersattherestaurantandveryyoungcollegeclassmates.
Kara’sphonebeeped,startlingherbackintoreality.Shepulledthephonefromherpocket.“Simon,”sheinformedHelenwithasmileassheglancedatthetextmessage.
RUdonetalkingaboutmeyet?
Really?LikesheandHelenhadnothingbettertodothantalkabouthim?Herfingersflewassheflippedbackamessage.
Yournamehasn’tevencomeup.Arrogantmuch?
Areplycamealmostinstantly.
No.ButIknowmymom.Ifyoudon’tcomehomesoon,I’mcookingdinner.
“OhmyGod,Ihavetoleave.”ShegaveHelenagrinandanexpressionofmockhorror.
“Why?”Helenasked,herexpressionperplexed.
“Simon’sthreateningtocookifIdon’tgetbacktothecondo.”
Helen’stinklinglaughshimmeredaroundKara,makingherchucklealongwiththeolderwoman.Helensuckedinanamusedbreathandreplied,“AnominousthreatcomingfromSimon.He’slikelytohurthimself.”
“Yep.He’saculinarydisasterifhetriesanythingexceptsandwichesormicrowavedinners,”KaraansweredHelenasshetyped.
I’llheadthatwaysoon.Please,donotcook.
“Sneaky,manipulativeman,”Karawhisperedfondlyassheslidoutofthebooth.
“He’sobviouslymissingyou.It’sromantic.”Helensighed,adreamylookinhereyesasshestoodupbesideKara.“Justdon’tlethimgetawaywithtoomuch.”
Karahuggedherfriendwithanamusedexpression.ItwasmorelikelythatSimonwashungryanddidn’twantasandwich,butshedidn’twanttosquashHelen’sloftyidealsaboutherson.“I’llseeyoutomorrownight,”Karaanswered,headingforthedoor.
ShesearchedforJamesandtheMercedeswitheagereyes,readytobebackatthecondowithSimon.Hemightnotbetrulymissingher,butshemissedSimon.Thebestpartofherdaywasevening,spendingtimewithhim,talkingaboutwhathadhappenedduringtheirday,throwingaroundopinionsandideas.Theycouldtalkaboutimportantthings,orjustlittlethings.Itneverseemedtomatter.
OhGod,I’mpitiful.
SpottingJames,shepickedupherpacetogettothecar,realizingwithshockthatshehadbeenincrediblylonesomebeforeshehadmetSimon.Strange,butshehadneverfeltalone.Everyday,shehadbeensurroundedbypeople,customers,students,crowds.Yet,thelonelinesshadbeenthere,burieddeepinsideher,shovedbeneathexhaustion,hunger,andtheneedtosurvive.Waiting.
Pullingthecardooropen,sheslidintothefrontseatbesideJames,stillwonderingwhyshehadneverrecognizedheryearningforthecompanyofamale
Becauseitwasn’tthere.NotuntilImetSimon.It’shim.Idon’twantjustanymale.
Damnit,itwastrue.Sheknewit.TherewassomethingaboutSimonthatcalledtoher,beckonedhertobringhimcloser,soclosethatshemayverywellgetburned.Nevertheless,thelurewasthereanditwasseductive;Simon’scome-hithervibrationswereenticingandimpossibletoignore.
WhyamIsodrawntohim?We’renothingalike.
Shakingherheadagainstthesuppleleatheroftheseat,Karaadmittedtoherselfthatinsomesuperficiallikesanddislikes…theyweredifferent.Butinmanyways…theyweresoverysimilar.
AfterbeingburnedbyChris,shewaswary…justlikeSimon.ThecausesmightbedifferentandshewasfairlycertainthatSimon’sweremuchmoretraumatic,butthetwoofthemcircledeachotherlikefrightenedchildren,notquitesureiftheywantedtobefriendorfoe,whethertheywantedtotrustornot.
SheknewSimonhadgivenheravaluablegiftwhenhehadtrustedherenoughtotakeherwithouthisusualprocedureofbondageandblindness.Shejustwishedsheknewwhatcausedhisdistrust.Andwhytheblindfold?Themanhadabodytodroolover.
SheshiveredandshotaweaksmileatJamesashepulledthevehicleintotraffic,weavinghiswayslowlytowardthecondo.
Sheblewoutalong,shakybreath,desperatelyhopingthatshewasn’tinadvertentlyputtingherheadonthechoppingblockbygettingsoinvolvedwithamanlikeSimon.
Justgowithit.Relax.Enjoywhatyouhavewhileyouhaveit.
Shebitbackaself-deprecatinglaugh.Shedidn’trelax,shedidn’trollwiththeflow,andshehadnever,everlivedinthemoment.Thosewerealldifficultthingstodoforawomanwhoneededtoworryaboutwherehernextmealwascomingfromandifshecouldscroungeupenoughmoneytopayherrenteverymonth.
Butyoudon’tneedtoworryaboutthatnow.
No…shedidn’t.Itmightnotlastverylong,butforabrieftime,sheknewshehadabedtosleepin,aroofoverherhead,andplentyoffoodtoeat.BecauseofSimon,shehadtimeandspacetoactuallybreathe.
Herheartstutteredasshepicturedhim,ashewaslastweekonthecouch,vulnerable,yetsoverystrong.Howcouldshenotadmirethatstrengthanddeterminationtobeatwhateverphantomsofthepastwerehauntinghim?
Hediditforme.BecauseIwantedit.
Drawingpowerfromhermemories,Karagatheredherbackpack.Shewashome.Jameshaddeliveredhertothefrontofthemassivebuilding.“Thankyou,James.”Shegavehimasheepishgrin,suddenlynoticingthatshehadn’tspokenawordtothedriverontheshorttriphome.
“You’remostwelcome,Ms.Kara.Asalways.Haveaniceevening.”
“You,too.”Slidingoutoftheseat,backpackinhand,sheclosedthedoorandjoggedtowardtheentrance.
Shewouldhaveaniceevening.Howcouldshenot?Shehadadark,sexy,handsomemanwaitingforher.Hemightwantdinner,butshewasdeterminedtogivehimsomethingmorethanjustfood.ItwastimetogivebacktoSimon.Afterall,hehadtrustedher,shelteredher,madeherfeellikeshewassomeonespecial.
Shehopedhewashungry,andnotjustforfood.
Wavingatthewatchfuldoorman,sheslippedsilentlyintotheelevatorthatwenttothepenthouse.
Liveinthemoment.Don’tthinkaboutthefuture.
Itmightfeeltotallyalientoher,butshewasgoingtotry.Simoncursedashewrappedawhitetowelaroundhiswaist,pissedoffathimselfforforgettingtobringcleanclothes.Afterhisworkout,hehadheadedstraightfortheshowerthatwasattachedtohisgym,completelyforgettingtograbsomethingtowearfromhisbedroom.Thedamntowelbarelycoveredhisfamilyjewels.
Hescowledathissweaty,stinkingworkoutclothing.Therewasnowayhewasputtingthembackonafterhehadjustwashedthestenchfromhisbody.
Karawasn’thomeyet.Heshouldhavetimetomakeittohisroom.Finger-combinghiswethair,heopenedthebathroomdoor,readytosprintdownthestairsandtothemasterbedroom.
Coldairblastedhimasheleftthesteamybathroombehind.Shit.Thegymwasfreezing.He’dcrankedthetemperaturedownforhisworkout,andhewasfeelingthechill.
“Simon,areyou-”
Thelight,femininevoicestartledhim.Halfwayacrossthegym,hefroze,hisheartthunderingasKaracamebreezingintotheroom.
Heflinchedashereyesroamedoverhim,readyforherlookofdistaste…orworse.Thescarsonhischestandabdomenwereglaring,somethingthathewenttogreatlengthstohidefromtheworld…especiallyfromwomen.
Hetriedtogethisfeettomove,toturnaroundandtakehimbacktothebathroom.ButashiseyesmetKara’s,hewasparalyzed.
Sheadvancedslowly,hereyeshugeandround,butshedidn’tlookappalled.Shelooked…hungry.Hertonguedartedouttolickherlipsasshesaidreverently,“God,you’rehuge.Muscular.Iknewyouwereripped,butyoumakemalestripperslooklikeajoke.”
Simonswallowedhardasshereachedhimanddroppedherbackpackonthefloor.“I’mscarred.”Fuckingbrilliant,Hudson.Likeshehadn’tnoticed?
ShewascloseenoughthatSimoncouldsmellhersweetscent.Heinhaled,hiscockrisingasshecranedhernecktoglanceupathimwithalookoflongingthatslammedintohisgutlikeafreighttrain.
Hervoicetrembledasshesaidinabreathywhisper,“Pleasedon’taskmenottotouchyou,Simon.Ineedtotouchyou.IthinkI’lldieifyoudon’tletme.”
He’dexpectedanynumberofreactionsfromher,butnotthis.Hiswholebodyfloodedwithheat,withtheneedtofeelhersmall,capablehandsonhisbody.Howcouldshelookathimwiththissortofneed?
“Idon’tliketobetouched,”hesaid,hisvoicehusky.
“Don’tlikeit,oraren’tusedtoit?”shequeriedsoftly.
Fuck.Hewassuchaliar.TherewasnothinghewantedmorethanKara’shandsonhisbodyrightnow.Right.Fucking.Now.“Idon’tknow,”heansweredhonestly,shakenbyherreactiontohim
“Youhaveabeautifulbody,Simon,”shetoldhimassheliftedherhandstohischest.
Hebracedhimselfasherhandscaressedhischestlovingly,glidingoverhisskin,settinghiswholebeingonfire.Thecontactfeltlikepuresex,soerotic,sosensual.Grittinghisteeth,hewilledhisbodytorelax…butitwasn’tlistening.Herfingersslidslowlyoverhisabdomenandheheardherbreathcatch.
“You’resohard,Simon.”
Yeah.Hewashard.Everywhere.“Fuck!Kara.”Hisbreathstartedcominginhardpantsashermoist,warmlipsjoinedherroamingfingers,hertonguelappingathischest.
“Mmmm…yousmellsogood.Tasteevenbetter.”
Henearlycameinthetowelasherteethlatchedontooneofhisflatnipples,followedbyasoothinglaveofhertongue.
HolyChrist!Hiswholebodywastrembling,readytogoupinflames.“Stop,”hegroaned.No,don’tstop.
Shegraspedthetowelaroundhiswaistandtugged.Thematerialgavewayeasilyandshedroppedthetoweltothefloor.“Youfeelsogood,Simon.Don’tmakemestop,”shecroonedasshepalmedhisengorgedmemberinhersmallhand.“Iwanttotasteyou.”Seriously?Didshemean-
“Everywhere.”
Ohyeah,shedid.
Herblueeyesdarkenedasshelookedupathimwithapleadingglance.DearGod,hecouldn’tturnaway.Hewantedthoselusciouslipsonhiscockmorethanhewantedtotakehisnextbreath.“Kara…Ihaven’t.Idon’t-”He’dalwaysneededtodominate,totiewomenup.Hehadneverwantedtoshovehiscockintheirmouthswhiletheywerelyinghelplesslybeneathhim.Andnoneofthemhadeverwantedhimto.
“Good.Thenyouwon’tknowifIdon’tdoitwell.”Herlookofvulnerabilityflooredhim,makinghimforgethisowninsecuritiesabouthisscarredbody,andhehadthesuddenurgetopoundherexintotheground.
“Notpossiblethatitwouldn’tbeincrediblewithyou,”hetoldherharshly,hisvoicegraveledwithrampantdesire.Hesnakedhishandbehindherneckandbroughthermouthtohis,hisotherhandsplayingoverherasstotugherclosertohim.
Shedoesn’tcareaboutmyscars.Shestillwantsme.There’snowomanonthisearthwhocouldfakeherreaction.
Hetookhermouthoverandover,wantingtosomehowshowherhowmuchheracceptancemeanttohim.
Shereturnedhiskisswithafirethatheatedhisblood.Hertongueentwinedwithhisandshemoanedoneofhersweetlittlenoisesintohismouth,aneedysoundthatnearlymadehimloseit.
Shepulledhermouthfromhisandslowlyloweredherselftoherknees,trailinghertonguealonghischestandoverhisabdomenasshewent.JesusChrist!Hewasn’tsurehewasgoingtolivethroughthis.
Sweatbeadedonhisforehead,drippingslowlydownhisface.Bloodpoundedthroughhisears,theswooshingnoiseofhisheartbeatdeafeninghim.Allhecoulddowasfeel.
Thefirsttouchofhertonguewassublime.Ittwirledoverhissensitivetip,lickingadropofpre-cumlikeitwasherfavoritecandy.
“Shit.Kara.”Hepulledtheclipfromherhairandburiedhisfingersintothesilkenmass,shudderingasthesoftwavesflowedoverhishands.
Heinhaledsharplyassheclosedhermouthoverhiscock,takinghimintothemoist,hotclaspofherlips,pullingtheswollenshaftasfarasshecouldpossiblytakeit,bumpingthebackofherthroat.
Fuck.Fuck.Heaven.Hell.Bliss.Agony.He’dneverexperiencedanythingliketheexquisitesensationofthattalentedtongueslidingoverhim,tastinghimwithaneroticpleasurethatwasabouttomakethetopofhisheadexplode.Shesuckedandglided,twirledandtugged,untilSimonthoughthewaslosinghismind.
“Oh,Christ.”Thewordsexplodedinatorturedvoicethathecouldbarelyrecognizeashelookeddownather,watchingherdevourhiscockwithobviousenjoyment.Hereyesopened,herlookscorchingastheirgazesmetandlocked
Simonfelthisballstightenandthegatheringpressureatthebaseofhisshaft.Hewasgoingtocome…hard.Theireyeslostcontactashethrewhisheadback,hishandsguidingherheadinarapidrhythmalonghispulsatingshaft
Herhandscuppedhisass,hernailsscoringoverhissensitizedskin.“Oh,hellyeah.I’mgonnacome,”hegrunted,unabletoverbalizeanythingelse,knowingheneededtogiveKaraawarningthathewasabouttoeruptlikeafuckingnuclearexplosion.
Shedidn’tmoveaway.Shemoanedaroundhim,thevibrationsendinghimovertheedge.Hernailsdugintohisassandshepracticallyswallowedhiscockashereleasedhimselfwithanagonizedcry,hismusclesscreamingastheytensedandreleasedfromhisviolentorgasm.
SimonpantedheavilyasKaracontinuedtolavehiscock,lickingeverydropsensually,languidly.
Hewantedtokissher,neededtokissher,buthispantswerecomingsoheavilythathecouldn’tcatchhisbreath.HaulingKaraupandintohisarms,hesimplyheldher,hisarmswrappingaroundherbody,herfaceinhisneck.
Hegulped,tryingtoforceairintohisburninglungsashemoldedhersweetbodyagainsthis.
“Wasitgood?”sheaskedhimquietlyashermouthnuzzledhisneck.
Simonlaughed,wheezingashereplied,“Sweetheart,ifitwasanybetteritwouldhavekilledme.”God,thiswomanwasspecial.Sosweet,sosexy.So…his.
Mine.
Ahardwaveofpossessivenesssweptoverhimandhisarmstightenedaroundher.
“Iactuallywascominguptoaskyouwhatyouwantedfordinner,”sheinformedhiminamatter-of-factvoice,herapparentnervousnessaboutnotperformingwellseemingtohavevanished.“Butseeingyougloriouslynudetookawaymyappetiteforfood.Iwantedtotakeabiteoutofyou.”
Herhandssweptoverhisbodyandhischestachedwiththerealizationthatshereallydidlustforhisbody,scarsandall.“Iwasn’tnudeuntilyoustrippedmeofmytowel,”heremindedher.
“Howdoyouexpectmetoresist?You’reawalkingtemptation.Atestosteronemenaceinatinylittletowel,”shesniffed,buttherewashumorinhervoice.
Simonchuckledsoftlyagainstherhair.Hecouldn’thelpit.Karawasafuckingmiracle.Hismiracle.“HowaboutItakeabiteoutofyou,now?”hemurmuredwarmly,hisbodymorethanreadytostartrisingtotheoccasion.
Shebrokeawayfromhimandpickeduphistowel,snappinghisabdomenwithitasshedemanded,“Ohno,youdon’t,mister.I’mstarvingnow.Putthatthingaway.It’sdangerous.”Shetossedthetowelathimwithadelightedgigglethatstruckhimrightinthechest.Catchingthetowelinmid-air,hewrappeditaroundhiswaist,hiscockalreadyhalfhardagainforher.
Itwasstrange,howcomfortablehewaswithhisbodyexposedaroundher.Hewasstillshakinghisheadoverherobviousdelightinseeinghimnude,buthewasn’tgoingtoquestionsomethingthathadhimhappierthanhehadbeenin…well…ever.“Comeon,sweetthing.Justatinynibble,”hegrowledashestalkedher.
“Nope.Noway.Putitaway.Ineedfood.”Shelaughedoutloudasshescamperedforthedoor.
Heroaredandlunged,chasingherdownthestairsandintothekitchen,herlaughterringingthrougheverycornerofhisemptyhouse.
Andfillingeveryinchofhisemptyheart.
WhatinthehellamIdoinginthisdress?
Thenextevening,Karastoodinfrontofafull-lengthmirrorinherroom,contemplatingherappearance.
Simondidn’twanttogotothisparty,hadadmittedthathehatedSam’sannualbirthdaybash.
Whohatedbirthdayparties?
Karafrownedatherselfinthemirrorassheturnedonewayandthentheother,tryingtodecideifshewasoverdressed.Orunderdressed.Theburgundydresswasbeautiful,buttheclingysilkmaterialdrapedeverycurve,endingatmid-thighandleavingaconsiderableamountofherlegsondisplay.Thenudesilkstockingsthatendedindelicatelaceatthetopsofherthighsdidlittletowarmherlonglegsandthedrapeacrossonlyoneshoulderlefttheotheronecompletelybare.
Shehadflinchedwhenshepulledthedressfromthecloset,shockedbythepricetagstillattachedtothegarment.Holycrap!Whoworeadressthatcostasmuchasherpreviousgroceryallowanceforsixmonths?Seeingtheoutrageouspricehadbeenenoughtomakeherwanttoshoveitbackinthecloset.Theonlyreasonshehadn’twasbecauseshehadnothingappropriatetowear.
Sheslippedherfeetintoapairofmatchingshoes,thestilettoheelshighenoughtoensurethatshewouldbeastallassomeofthemaleguests.
ExceptSimon.Noshoeswouldeverputhereye-to-eyewithSimon.
Nervous,sheshovedherlonghairoverhershoulder.Leavingitloosemightnothavebeenthebestplan,butshehadnoideahowtodofancystyles.Herlong,darkhairwasgenerallymoreofanuisancethananythingelse,makingherthinkaboutcuttingitshortmorethanonceoverthelastseveralyears.
Staringbackatherselfinthemirror,hereyeslookedenormous.Shehadaddedmake-up,somethingsherarelybotheredwithbecauseofthecostandtimeinvolved,theresultnotsomethingthatshewassuresheliked.Wastheredlipstickalittletoomuch?Ohhell,shejustdidn’tknow.Itwasn’tlikesheattendedpartiesorgatheringsofthistype.Actually,shehadn’tbeentoapartyofanytypeformoreyearsthanshecouldremember;probablythelastonehadbeenwhenherparentswerestillalive.Afterthat,herlifehadbeenaconstantcycleofworkandsurvival.
Sheshovedhersaggingshouldersback,tryingtotellherselfthatshewouldnotbeintimidated.Simonhadaskedhertogo,wantedhertobethere,andshewouldn’tlethimdown.ItwouldbesomucheasiertoplaychickenandtellSimonshewasn’tfeelingwellandcouldn’tgo,butshecouldn’tdoit.Simonwasgoodtoher,hadliterallysavedherlife.
Takingonelastlookinthemirror,Karascoopedasmallblackbagfromthebedandheadedforthekitchen.Sheshiftedonehandtoherbelly,tryingtoquiettheswarmofbutterfliesthatseemedtohaveinvadedherstomach.
Calmdown,Kara.It’sjustabirthdayparty.Nobigdeal.
Stoppingattheentrancetothekitchen,shesawSimondressed,readyandnonetoohappy.Hewasstandingnearthecupboard,handsomeassininbrowndresspantsandagorgeouscream-coloredfisherman’ssweater.Hairneatlygroomed,hiseveningdarkwhiskersalreadyshowing,helookedgoodenoughtoeat.
Youalreadydidthat.Yesterday.
Karaflushed,theroomsuddenlywaytoowarm,assherememberedthedaybefore.Herbehaviorhadbeensooutofcharacter.Sobrazen.ButithadbeendifficulttoseeSimon,inallhisglory,lookingslightlyinsecureandtrapped.Ithadkickedinaprotectiveinstinct,aboldandaudaciousbehaviorthathadsurprisedher.Whenhadshebecomesuchaboldseductress?Shewassexuallyrepressed,totallynotthetypeofwomantocomeontoamanlikeSimon.Hislookofuncertaintyhadspurredheron,madeherdeterminedtoshowhimhowincrediblysexyhelooked,howtemptinghereallywas.Andhewastempting.Sure,hehadsomescarsonhischestandabdomen,somesmall,somenotsosmall,all
“Ohgood.You’rehere.Iwasjust-”Simonstoppedinmid-sentenceashelookedupather.
“I’mready,”shetoldhim,tryingtosoundconfidentasshesteppedintothekitchen.
Hiseyesturneddark,hisgazeroamingherbody.Shewantedtosquirmwhenhisperusalcontinued,hisjawfirmingashiseyeslingeredonherexposedlowerlimbs.
“D-DoIlookallright?”Oh,shit.Maybeshewasdressedallwrong.
“You’restunning,”heansweredinahuskyvoice,hiseyesfinallylandingonherface.“Butyou’reshowingwaytoomuchskin.Andyourhairisdown.”
Shetiltedherheadquizzically.“Isthatbad?”
“I’mnotsurethatIwantothermentoseeyouthisway.”Heprowledforward,stoppinginfrontofher.Onehandonhernakedshoulder,heslowlycaressedtheexposedskin,makinghershudderfromhislight,sensualtouch.“You’rewaytoomuchofatemptation.”
Karaletoutabreaththatshehadn’trealizedshewasholding,relievedthathethoughtshelookedacceptable.“Ithinkyou’retheonlyonewhothinksso,Simon.Ithinkyouneedyoureyeschecked,”shetoldhimlightly.
“You’resofuckingbeautifulthatitalmosthurtstolookatyou,”herumbledashislipsgrazedhertemple.“Mycockgothardtheminuteyouwalkedintotheroom.”Hegraspedherhand,bringingittohisarousal.Hewassofirmanderectthatherpantiesdampenedandherstomachclenched.
God,hesmellssogood.
Karakissedhiswhiskeredjaw,breathingdeeply,lovinghismasculinesmell.Herfingersspreadoverhisengorgedmember,totallyunabletostopherselffromcoppingafeel.
“Kara,youdrivemeinsane,”Simongroundoutashetrappedherwanderinghandandliftedittohislips,placingawarm,lingeringkisstoherpalm.“Ifwestartthis,we’llnevergettotheparty.NotthatImind,”hegrowled.
“It’syourparty,”sheansweredwithamusement.“Youcan’tblowitoff.”
“Kissmeandsee,”heansweredprovocatively,hisarmslidingaroundherwaist.
Shecouldfeelhiswarmbreathonthesideofherface.Histemptingmouthwasclose,soclose,andslippingawayfromhimwasalmosttorture.“Yourmomwouldneverforgiveme.Let’sgo,party-boy.”
Hepoutedlikeaninfantwhosefavoritetoyhadbeentakenaway,butthecursethatsprangfromhismouthwasanythingbutboyish.
“Youneedacoat,”hetoldher,histoneprotectiveanddemanding.
“Ihaveone.I’llgrabit.AndI’msureSam’shouseiswarm,”shemusedquietly.
Shewenttoherroom,returningquicklytothekitchenwithablacktailoredjacketinhand.
Simonheldhishandout,pullingthejacketfromhergrasp.Hehelditoutandsheslippedherarmsintothegarment,appreciatingtheluxuriousfeelofthesilklining.
Turningheraround,hedidupthelargebuttonsonthefront,everysingleoneofthem.
Hefrowned.“Doyouthinkthatwillbewarmenough?”
“Yes.It’sfine.Weonlyhavetogetinandoutofthecar.Iprobablywouldn’thaveevenwornajacketifyouhadn’tmentionedit.”
Karasighedlightlyasshepulledherhairfromthejacket,surprisedbyherdelightinSimon’slittlegesturesthatmadeherfeelcaredfor.Ithadbeensolongsinceanyonehadcaredaboutherwellbeingthathisactionswerealluringandheadyforastreet-smartwomanwhohadbeensoaloneforsolong.
“I’mstillnotsureIlikeyoushowingthatmuchskin,”hegruntedasshepickedupherhandbagandheadedforthedoor.
Karabitherlipasshiversrandownherspine.Hissexyvoicewassopossessive,asthoughhewereclaimingher.
Don’teventhinkaboutit.Hedoesn’tmeananythingbyit.
“It’snotthatsexy,”shetoldhimwryly,wishingshewereasirresistibleashemadeherfeel.
“It’swaytoosexy.EverymantherewillbethinkingthesamethingasI’mthinking,”hetoldher,hisexpressionunhappyasheusheredheroutthedoorandlockedit.
Shepushedthebuttonwiththedownsymbolfortheelevatorandturnedtohim.“Andwhatisthat?”
“ThatIwanttofuckyou,”heansweredbluntly,hishandcomingtorestatthesmallofherback.
Herbreathhitchedastheelevatorbellrang,thedoorsswooshingopeninfrontofthem.WouldsheevergetusedtoSimon’sbluntremarks?Hercheeksflushedandherbodywaswaytoowarm.Hot,actually.Extremelyhot.“Simon!”
Heshruggedasheenteredtheelevatorbehindher.“It’strue.”
“You’reterrible,”sheadmonishedhiminherbestteacher-likevoice.
“Oh,Icanbebad.Very,verybad,”hetoldherinaseductive,lowwhisper,hishandstrappingheragainsttheelevatorwall,oneoneachsideofherhead.“KissmeandImightbehave.Fornow.”
Karalookedupintohisglowingeyesthatpresentlyresembledhotmeltedchocolate.Ohhell,shelovedchocolate,soshedidwhatanyself-respectingchocolateloverwoulddo.
Shekissedhimjustastheelevatordoorsclosed,lockingthembrieflyinasilentlittleworldalltheirown.
KarareleasedastartledsqueakasSimon’shandreachedoutandslappedthestopbuttonontheelevator.She’dbeenlostinhiskiss,obliviousofthemotionoftheelevatorashekissedherintoacoma.Buttheloud,smackingnoiseofhispalmhittingthebuttonandthelurchofthemovingelevatorcarcomingtoanabrupthaltyankedheroutofheralternatereality.Damnit.
“Whatinthehellareyouwearingunderneaththisdress?”Simongrowledagainstherlipsashiswanderingfingersstrokedlightlyoverherass.
“Stockings,panties.”Shenippedathisbottomlipassheanswered.
Hishandreachedforthehemoftheshortdress,liftingitandspinningheraround.Momentarilyconfused,shelethim.
“Christ.Thosearen’tunderwear.Yourassisshowing.”Histonewaslowandhusky,hishandsexploringthesupplecheeksofherexposedbackside.
Hercheeksflushedassherememberedpullingonthetinyblackthongandmatchingbra.ThewardrobethatSimon’sassistanthadpurchasedforhercontainedmostlyracylingerie.“Youboughtit.Matchingsets.Allverysimilartothisone.”
“It’snotthatIdon’tappreciateit,”heansweredinaslow,sexyutteranceashisfingersslidunderneaththetinybackstrap.
“Ithoughtyousaidyouweregoingtobehave,”sheansweredbreathlessly,herconsciousmindslippingawayashisfingersslidlowerandlower.
“Ilied.ThatwasbeforeIfeltthesepantiesandhadtoseethem.NowIwanttoseethematchedset.”
Oh,God.Shegroanedasheturnedhertofacehim,hisfingersnimblyunbuttoninghercoatanddroppingitontheplushcarpetintheelevator.
“Simon,we’reintheelevator.Wecan’tdothishere,”sherepliedwithacombinationofmortificationanddesire.
Thezipperofherdressgavewayunderhissearchinghandsandshecouldfeelthelightbrushofhisfingersdownherspineashepulleditdowninonesmoothjerk.
“Privateelevatorforthepenthouse.It’snotlikesomeoneiswaitingtouseit.”Hisbreathhitchedasheexposedherupperbody,lettingthedresscatchatherwaist.“You’resobeautiful.”
Shesuckedinatremblingbreathashetrailedafingerfromhercheek,downherneck,andalongtheexposedswellofherbreastsoverthetopofthelacybra.Heatpooledbetweenherlegs,soakingthetinyscrapofmaterialbetweenherthighs.Histhumbsrubbedlightlyoverherthinlycoverednipplesashismouthloweredtotrailoverthehotfleshabovethem.Hiswhiskersabradedherseductivelyashelicked,nipped,andsuckled,drivingherhalfmadtohavehiminsideher.
“Icansmellyourneedandit’smakingmymouthwaterforatasteofyou.”Heliftedhishead,hisdarkeyesappearingalmostblackwithhunger.
Hishandtraileddownherquakingbellyandunderneaththedresspooledatherhips.Shehissedashisbluntfingertipsslippedbeneaththesaturatedsilkofherpanties.Suddenly,shedidn’tcareifshewashalfnakedinanelevator.AllshewantedwasSimon.
Kneesweak,shesteadiedherselfbyputtingherhandsonhisshouldersandtookwhateverhewasoffering.Ashepulledhismidnightgazefromhersandkissedhiswaydownhertautstomach,sheknewthatwhathewasofferingwaspurebliss,andshewasn’tabouttofightit.
Herippedthedelicatematerialofherpanties,pullingthegarmentforcefullyfromherbody.Hernakedpussytingledasitwasexposedtotheambientair.ShegrippedSimon’sshoulderstightlyashedroppedtohiskneesinfrontofher,thesightofhisdarkheaddippingunderthehemofherdressmakingherlegsunsteadyandherwholebodyshiverwithhotneed.
Scorchinghandsranfromherkneestothetopsofherthighs,glidingsmoothlyoverherthinstockings.Sheheldherbreathashishottongueexploredthesensitivefleshofherthighsatthetopofthelacebeforefinallypartingthefoldsofherpussyslowly,exploringthefleshoftheprotectivelips.
“Oh,God.Simon.”Shemoanedasherheadfellbackandhereyesclosed,wantingtowatchhimdevourher,butunabletotoleratetheintensityofherdesire.
Heatsnakedthroughherbelly,slitheringovereveryinchofherskinashepushedhistonguedeeper.Anddeeper.Shewantedtograsphishead,pullhismouthharderagainstherneedyflesh,butshedidn’t.ItwasonesmallstepatatimewithSimon.Shedidn’twanttopushanybuttonsthatmightcausehimtostop.Curlinghernailsintotheheavysweateronhisshoulders,sheclutchedthefabriclikeitwasalifeline,herbodywhirlingasSimon’ssizzlingtonguefoundherclit,flickingoveritwithbold,faststrokes.
Whimpering,shethrustherhipsforward,silentlybeggingformore.Andhegaveittoher.Hisbighandscuppedherass,bringingherforward,jerkinghertightlyagainsthisplunderingmouth,thesoundofhimlappingatherplentifuljuiceseroticandhot.
Sheexplodedinhismouthwithalongmoan,herbodyquaking,herpussyfloodingwithwelcomerelief.Simoncontinuedtolave,drawingoutherclimaxuntilshewasaquiveringmess,beforehedrewhimselfupandkissedher.
Herarmstightenedaroundhisneck.Shestretchedandyankedhisheaddown,franticforcontact.Thetasteofherselfonhislipsashekissedhersenselessmadeherundulateherhips,feelinghisrock-harderectionrubbingbetweenherthighs.Sheneededhiminsideher.Desperately.
“Fuckme,Simon.Please.”Shebeggedwithoutanyshame,feelingtheemptinessthatonlyhecouldfill.
“Upstairs.”Hegroanedashismouthpulledawayfromhers.Hegrippedherass,grindinghimselfagainsther.
“Here.Now,”sheinsistedassheturnedandfacedthewalloftheelevator.Placingherhandsonthewall,shebentatthewaistandopenedherlegswideandtoldhim,“Myhandswillstayonthewall.Please.Justdoit.Ineedyounow.”
“Fuck!”Hiscursewasfrustrated,butsopassionatethatKarawasn’tsurprisedtohearthezipperofhispantslowering.
Yes.Anothervictory.
“Ineedyou.”Simon’shoarsewhisperwasalmostinaudible.Karaknewhehadn’tmeantforhertohearhim,butshedid.Thequiet,harshlyutteredwordsechoedinhermind,drawingforthanansweringprimalresponsethatnearlybroughthertoherknees.
Theairintheelevatorwassteamyandtheonlysoundinthesmall,crampedspacewastheragged,unevenbreathscomingfromtheirmouths,asshewaitedforhimtoimpaleher,tofeelhimfillingupthelonelyplacesinsideher.“Please,Simon.Now.”
Karanearlysobbedwithreliefasshefeltthebluntheadofhiscockbrushtheneedyfleshbetweenherspreadlegs.Hislargehandsgrippedherhipswithanalmostsavagestrength,pullingherbackagainsthim,hiscockslammingintoherslickchannelwithonepowerful,hardstroke.
ShegaspedfromthepureelationofSimon’spossession.“DidIhurtyou?”Simonraspedasshefelthisbodytense.“You’resotight.”
“No.No.Itjustfeelssogood.”Shepushedbackagainsthim,urginghimtomove.
“Jesus,Kara.Youdeservebetterthangettingfuckedinadamnelevator.”Simongroanedashepulledback,tightenedhisgriponherhipsandburiedhimselftotherootinsideheragain.“ButIcan’tstop.Neverwanttostop.”
“Youcan’tstop.Icouldn’ttakeitifyoustopped.Harder,Simon.Givememore.”HerheadfellbackasSimonstartedaneven,deeprhythmthatthreatenedtodriveherinsane.Thecoarsewoolofhissweaterabradedherspineasheleanedforward,hisbodycurlingaroundherprotectivelyashekeptupahard,punishingthrustwithhiships.Inandout.Overandover.Shequiveredashishot,uncontrolledbreathhitthesideofherfaceashenippedatthetenderfleshofherneck.
Neverhadsheexperiencedaneedsovolatileanduntamed.Yearningtoholdhimashepoundedintoher,shegrippedthemetalbalancebarandshovedherpelvisback,meetingSimonstrokeforstroke,needingthecontactofskinonskinwherevershecouldgetit.
Oneofhishandsleftherhipandsliddownthefrontofher,betweenherthighs.Hecaressedthespringycurlsbeforehisfingersslippedlower,soveryclosetotheswollenbudoffleshrightabovehispoundingcock.
“Oh,God!”EverynerveinherbodythrobbedasSimon’sfingerscircledherclit,makingherhipsslambackonhiscockwithastrengththatshedidn’tknowshehad.“Touchme.Please.”
“Comeforme,”Simon’sdeepvoicecommandedashisfingerszeroedinonthetinybudoffleshthatwasachingforhistouch.
Whimpering,herheadfellforwardandshewasblindedbythecurtainofhairthatwasswingingwildlyfromSimon’sbrutalthrusts.Sheclosedhereyes,nearlyunabletobearthewavesofpleasurethatcoursedthroughherbodyashisfingersstrokedrelentlesslyoverherclitwhilehiscockpossessedherchannel,owningher,takingher,meldingtheirbodiestogetheruntilshewasn’tsurewhethertheruthlessdesirebelongedtoherortoSimon.
Herclimaxhitwithajarringexplosionthathadhercryingouthisnameasspasmswrackedherbody,abodythatwasheldinhelplessthrall,unabletodoanythingexceptrideoutthesharp,endlessorgasmthatwasrockingherbody
“Fuck!”Simon’shandreturnedtoherhip,bothhandsgrippingherfirmly,tightlyashiscockcleavedintoherfaster,deeper.Agroanthatheldbothagonyandanguishsprangfromhisthroatasheburiedhimselftothehilt,floodingKarawiththeheatofhisrelease.
Shewouldhavesunktothefloor,herlegsunabletoholdherup,hadSimonnotwoundasteelyarmaroundherwaist,keepingherupright.Heturnedhergentlyandwrappedhisstrongarmsaroundherutterlylimpbody.Theirbreathingwasheavyandlabored.
Sheliftedherarmsaroundhisneck,restingherheadagainsthisshoulder,unabletothink.
Simonsupportedherweight,strokingherhairgentlyashisbreathingslowed.
Ittookherseveralminutestospeak.“I’mamess.Ineedtogobacktothecondoforafewminutes.”Lookingattheremnantsofherunderwearlyingonthefloor,sheadded,“IguessIneedtogetanewpairofpanties,too.”
Simon’sshouldersshookwithsuppressedlaughter.“Didyoulosethem?”
Shepulledback,herheartmeltingatthenaughty,amusedlookinhiseyes.“No.Somecavemanrippedthemoffme.”
Heraisedaneyebrow.“Musthavebeensomelustyencounter.”Hepushedherhairbackfromhereyes,drapingitsoftlyoverhershoulder.“I’llbuyyoumore.”
Sherolledhereyes.“Idon’tneedmore.Ihaveseveraldrawersfilledwithlingerie.Icouldgowithoutdoinglaundryforamonth.I’veneverownedsomuchlingerieinmyentirelife.”
“I’llstillgetyoumore.IfwhatyouhaveisassexyasthepairIjustdestroyed,itwon’tlastlong.”Hisvoicewashoarsewithatouchofwarningflowingthroughhiswords.
Hiswarmgazecaressedherpartiallycladbody,lingeringoneveryinchofbaredskin.
Sheshuddered,imaginingSimonrippingoffvariousarticlesoflingerieinafitofpassion.“Youcan’truinallmylingerie.Thosethingsareexpensive.”
“Ididn’thearyoucomplainingafewminutesago.”Hisvoicewashot,sultryandfilledwithapromiseofthingstocome.“I’dbuylingerieforyoueverydayifwhatjusthappenedistheresult.Hell,I’dbuyitforyoujusttoseeyousmile.”
Kara’sheartskippedabeat,herchestachingfromunexpressedemotion.Howmuchlongercouldshedothis?HowmuchlongercouldshehidethepowerfulandsometimespainfulemotionsthatSimonwrungfromherwithjustacasualcommentorasimpletouch?Herbrain,whichhadalwaysruledherlife,andherheartwereinconflict.Sheknewthatnothingmorethanacasualsexualrelationshipandfriendshipwouldeverexistbetweenherandthisincrediblemanwhowasholdingherasifshewasthemostimportantpersoninhislife.Still,shewantedhim.Howpatheticwasthat?
Backingaway,sheslippedherarmsbackintoherdress.“Canyouzipme?”Shehopedshesoundedcasualasshegavehimherback.
“DoIhaveto?Wecouldskiptheparty.”
“Yes.”Shebitherliptokeepfromsmiling.Hehadsoundedsohopefulthatshecouldn’thelpbeingamused.
Hedidn’tanswer,butshefelthisfingerslidinglazilyoverherspinebeforeheslidthezipperupwithamasculinesigh.
Turningheraround,heplacedonehandonhershoulderandtippedherchinupwiththeother,searchingherfacewithafrown.“DidIhurtyou?Iwasalittlerough.”
Karaknewshewouldprobablyhaveafewbruisesonherhipsfromhisstronggrip,buthisrough,rawpossessionwassomethingshehadbeenbeggingfor,somethingsheneeded.TheintensityofherpassionforSimonwouldn’thavebeensatisfiedwithanythingless.Sheliftedahandtohisroughjaw.“Iwasthere,Simon.IthinkIwasbeggingforit.No,youdidn’thurtme.”Herorgasmhadbeenintense,butthefactthathecaredaboutwhetherornotshemindedhisgritty,feralpossessionmadehercarejustalittlebitmore.
Ican’tbelieveIjusthadsomeofthehottestsexI’veeverhadinanelevator.
“OhGod,Ihopenobodyheardme.”Shegroanedasshepickedupherpurseandjacket,snatchinghershreddedpantiesfromthefloorandshovingthemquicklyintoherhandbag.
“Idoubtanyoneheardyou,althoughI’msurprised”-theredphoneontheelevatorpanelrang,interruptingSimoninmid-sentence,piercingthesilentspacewithanoisesoshrillthatKarajumped-“thatnobodycalled.”Simonsmirkedashefinishedthecomment.
“Oh,God.”Karaslumpedbackagainstthewall,mortified.Whileshewasinthegripofecstasy,shehadn’tthoughtaboutthefactthatotherswouldquestionthesuddenstopoftheelevator
Simonsnickeredandsnatchedthephonefromthewall.“Hudson.”Hisvoicewasinstantlyprofessionalandimpatient.
Shecouldn’theartheconversationattheotherend,butshecouldtellthatthevoicewasmale.
Simonshiftedashezippedhispants,hishipleaningagainstthebalancebar,hisexpressionsereneashelistened.Howinthehelldidhedothat?NoonewouldeverknowthatsheandSimonhadbeenscrewingliketheirlivesdependedonitonlyafewmomentsago.Helookedcoolandcalm;shewassureshelookedlikeshehadjustbeenthoroughlyravaged.
“No.Everythingisfine.IneededsomethingandIstoppedtheelevatortolookforit.”Simon’svoicewasnonchalant,butheshotheradark,wickedlook,hiseyeshooded,ahalfsmileformingonhislips.
Herfaceheatedandsheshothimbackamurderousglance.
“Yes.I’mquiteecstaticthatIfoundit.Thanksforchecking.Haveagoodnight.”Simondroppedthephonebackonthehookandslappedthebuttontoreturntothecondo.
Shepunchedhisshoulder.“Howcanyoutellsuchawhopperwithoutblinkinganeye?”
Simonshruggedandpulledherintohisarms.“I’mquitesureIprobablyblinkedsincetheaveragepersonblinkseverytenseconds.AndwhatIsaidisabsolutelytrue.”Hekissedherlightlyontheforeheadbeforecontinuing.“Ineededsomething.Ifoundithereintheelevator.AndIwasdefinitelyecstatic.”
Shelaughed.Shecouldn’thelpit.“AndIwasorgasmic.”
Theelevatorlurched,stoppingatthepenthouse.“Iknow.That’swhyIwasecstatic,”heansweredinahusky,quietvoice.“HearingyoucomeisthesweetestsoundI’veeverheard.”
Sheswallowed,tryingtopushdownthelumpthatformedinherthroat.HernippleshardenedasSimonreachedaroundherbodytounlockthedoorofthecondo.Hiswordsweredrippingwithblunt,rawhonesty.
Uncertainhowtoanswerhiscomment,shemadeabeelineforherroomassoonasheopenedthedoor.“I’llbeoutinaminute.Trynottogetmynewpairofpantieswetthistime.”
Sheheardasatisfied,malechucklebehindher.“Gettingyourpantieswetisbecomingmymaingoalinlife.”
Shesmiledassheenteredherroomandpulledoutafreshpairofunderwear,tryingtopushherownjumbledemotionsaside.
Simonhadtrustedherenoughtofuckherwithoutbindingher.Again.Maybesomeday…
Smallsteps,Kara.Don’texpecttoomuch.WhateveriseatingatSimonhasbeenthereforaverylongtime.Itcouldtakeyearstogainhistrust.
Andshewouldn’tbehereforyears.Shegrimaced,herscalpcryingoutinprotestassheranabrushruthlesslythroughherdisheveledhair.
Dowhatyoucan.Enjoywhatyouhavewhileyouhaveit.AndforGod’ssake,don’ttakeallofthistooseriously
EnjoyinghertimewithSimonwasnottheissue.Shecherishedeverymomentinhiscompanybecausebeingwithhimfilledherlonelyplacesinawaythatshehadneverexperiencedbefore.
I’mpoor.I’mpragmatic.Iamnotawomanwhobelievesinsoulmates:onemanandonewomanwhocompleteeachotherandaremeanttobetogether.
Problemwas,herparentshadbeenlikethat.Poorastheyhadbeen,theyhadalsobeencompletelyhappy.Inmanyways,itwasalmostablessingthattheyhadgonetogetherbecauseKarawasalmostcertainthatonewouldnothavesurvivedwithouttheother.Theyhadbeensoconnectedthateitherofherparentswouldhavebeentormentedandmiserablewithouttheother.Itwashardnottobelieveinreal,soul-bindingloveafterwatchingherparentsforeighteenyears.
Sheheavedasighandsetherbrushbackonthevanity.Okay…maybeshedidbelievethatlovecouldbethatintense,thatconsuming.ButnotwithSimon.NeverwithSimon.Themanwasheartbreakwaitingtohappen.Hedidn’tdocommittedrelationshipsandshewasalreadyonemotionaloverloadwithhim.
TheonlywaytosurviveherrelationshipwithSimonwastokeepitcasual,notletherheartgetinvolved.
Scoopingupherjacketandpurse,shesaunteredtowardthekitchen,hearingonlytwowordsrunningoverandoverinherheadandherownself-deprecatinglaughechothroughhermind.
Toolate.Toolate.SamuelHudsonhadalavishmansioninSouthTampa,anareasoaffluentthatKarahadneverbeentherebefore,eventhoughshehadgrownupinthecity.ShehadtoforceheropenmouthtocloseasJamespulledthecararoundthecirculardriveway,lettingthemoutinthefrontofthepalatialresidence.
“Thisis…spectacular,”shewhisperedtoSimonashetookherhandtohelpheroutofthecar.
“YouseewhyIdecidednottodrive?”hesaidinalazyvoice,hiseyesscanningtheexpensivevehiclesliningthelongdriveway.
“Youdrawquiteacrowd,Mr.Hudson,”shetoldhimsoftly,hereyesrovingoverhishandsomeface.“HappyBirthday.Ihaveapresentforyou,butI’llgiveittoyoulater.”
Hisfacelitupinawicked,wickedgrinastheireyeslockedinaheatedgaze.“Ithoughtyougaveittomelastnight.Andtonight.”
“Simon!”Sherefusedtoblushagain.Shewouldn’t.Absolutelynot.Shewasamature,adultwomanandshedidn’tblushoverasimplesexualcomment.Shewasanalmost-nurseforGod’ssake,usedtoseeingthehumanbodyinallstatesofdress.Itwasn’tlikeshewasayounggirl,butitwasaninfuriatingfactthatSimoncouldmakeherfeellikeonesometimes.
“Well…justsaying.ButIwon’targueifyouwanttodoitagain.Infact,wecouldgohomerightnow-”
“Inthehouse,birthdayboy.”Shelaughedasheslippedhisarmaroundherwaistandledhertothedoor,asmall,satisfiedsmirkstillpresentonhislips.
“Tomorrownightwe’regoingoutalone,”hemuttered,hisarmtighteningaroundherbodyasheledhertothefrontdoor.
“Tomorrow?”shesaid,confused.
“Foryourbirthday.I’mtakingyouout.Alone.”
Sheturnedtofacehimaftertheyhadclimbedthemarblesteps,stoppingatthehugedoubledoors.“Youaren’ttakingmeout.You’vedoneenough.It’snotnecessary.”
“It’sverynecessary,”heanswered,hisvoiceharsh.“Iwantto.It’syourbirthday.”
Thedoorswungopenbeforeshecouldanswer.
“Hey,bro!Gladyoufinallydecidedtojoinyourownparty.”
KaraimmediatelyrecognizedSamHudson.Simonhadbeenright.Hewasmovie-starhandsome.DressedsimilartoSimon,hissweaterwasanemeraldgreenthatnearlymatchedhiseyes.Helookedlikeanenormous,blond,mythologicalgod…butinKara’sopinion,helackedSimon’ssexappeal.AlthoughshecouldaestheticallyappreciateSam’shandsomefaceandgorgeousbody…hehadnothingonhisyoungerbrother.
Samstoodbackandmotionedforthemtoenter.KaracouldfeelSam’seyesstudyingher,hisbrainworkingfuriouslytofigureherout,putherinabox.Assheenteredthemarbledentryway,shewonderedwhatSimonhadtoldhisbrotherabouther.
“Kara,thisismybrotherSam,”Simonintroducedthemcasually,hishandreachingouttotakethejacketshewasdiscarding.Anelderlyman,obviouslyanemployee,tookthecoatfromSimon’sarm.
“Well,bro,noneedtoaskwhyIhaven’tseenmuchofyoulately,”Samsaidsoftly,histonemocking.
Karaextendedherhandpolitely.“It’snicetomeetyou,Sam.I’veheardalotaboutyoufromyourmother.”
“Apleasure.”Hishandengulfedhersmalleroneinafirmgrip,holdingitalittlelongerthannecessary.“Mom’stalkedaboutyoualot,too.Allofitgood,ofcourse,”Samanswered,hissmilebrilliantandhismannerpersuasive.
He’sgood.IseewhyHelensayshecancharmanyone.It’sreallytoobadthathissmiledoesn’tquitereachhiseyes.
Karareclaimedherhandbypullingitoutofhisgripandlettingitdroptoherside.
“Eat,getadrink,haveagoodtime,”Samsuggestedjovially,slappingSimonontheback.“Happybirthday,littlebrother.”
“Yeah,thanksfortheparty,”Simongrumbled,shootinghisbrotheranI’ll-get-you-for-thislookthatonlybrotherscouldexchangeashenudgedKaratowardaclusterofguestsandthefoodinthelivingroom.
“Youloveme.Youknowyoudo.”Samsmiled,hisvoiceteasingandarrogantatthesametime.
“Nottoday,”Simonsnarledback.
Samlaughedwickedlyashemovedaway,advancingtowardagroupofpeoplewhoweremotioningforhimtocomeover.
“Bastard,”Simonsaidinalow,irritatedvoice.
Kararolledhereyes,keepingheramusementtoherself.“He’syourbrother,Simon.”
“Nottoday,”herepeated,hishandslidingacrossherbackasheledhertothelavishfoodanddrinktables.
Sam’shomewasstunning,surprisinglydecoratedinwhite,light,airydécorthatmadethealready-spaciousmansionappearevenmoreenormousandgrand.Well-dressedguestschattedingroups,theirwealthandstatusobviousbytheirdressandtheireasewiththesumptuoussurroundings.
Karatriednottogawklikethepennilesswomanshereallywas,butitwasdifficulttokeephergapingmouthclosed.Thewomenweredrippingwithdiamondsandgemsandtheirexpressionswerecool.Themensmelledofmoneyandpower,gatheringingroups,probablydiscussingbusinessorgolfscores.
Simonfilledtheirplatesfromalargebuffetthatwasburstingwithelegant-lookingappetizersthatwerebeingcontinuallyreplenishedbysilentemployees.Shepickeduptwonapkinsthatwerefoldedsopreciselythatshealmostfeltguiltyaboutmessingthemup.ThedisheswereobviouslyfinechinaandKarafrowned.Crap…she’dhatetohavetocleanallofthesedishesandwonderedhowmanyservantsittooktocleanupthemessafterthepartywasover.Hadn’tthewealthyeverheardofpaperplatesandnapkins?
Shedidn’thaveanyideawhatshewaseating,butshedownedeverymorselonherplateaftersheandSimonhadfoundaquietcornertoeat.Everybitemeltedinhermouthandshelickedherlipsassheconsumedthelastdelicatetreat,hopingshehadn’tleftcrumbsonherface.
“God,thatwasdelicious,”sheutteredappreciativelyasshehandedheremptyplatetoaroamingwaiter.
“MayIgetyouanythingelse,madam?”theolderwaiteraskedpolitely.
“No,thankyou.I’mfull.”Shesmiledasthelittlemangaveherapolitebowandmovedaway.
Simonhaddiscardedhisplateandsnatchedtwofullchampagneflutesfromapassingwaitress.“Ilovethataboutyou,”hesaidquietlyashehandedheraglass.
“What?”Shegavehimaconfusedlookassheacceptedtheglass,sippingslowlyatthedrink,tryingtodecideifshelikedchampagne.Itwasdry,butnotbad.
“Youenjoyyourfood.Youdon’tpickawayatitoreatlikeabird.I’malmostjealouswhenIwatchyourface.Ifit’sgood,youlookwell-pleasured,”heansweredbeforetakingahealthysipfromhisglass.“Watchingyoueatisalmostaneroticexperience.”
Sheshruggedassheloweredtheglassfromherface.“Ifyoudon’thaveanendlesssupplyandyou’reneversurewhenyournextmealwillbe,youappreciatethetasteofgoodfood.”
“Willfoodalwaysbeanorgasmicexperienceforyou?”heaskedcasually,buthiseyeswerefullofmirth.
Shetriednottosmile,shereallydid,butherlipstwitchedashereyesmethis.“Probably.”
“Simon!”
Themaletenorvoicecarriedacrosstheroomandbothofthemturnedtoseeamiddle-agedmanraisinghisarm,tryingtogetSimon’sattention.
“Youbettercirculate,birthdayboy.Youaretheguestofhonor,”shetoldhimwithasmile.“I’mgoingovertotalkwithyourmomforawhile.”
Hedidn’tlookhappy,buthelefthersideandwenttogreetthemanwavingfranticallyforhisattention.ShesippedherdrinkandwatchedasSimonmovedaroundtheroom,greetingpeople,hissmilecharming.WhilehemightnothavequitethecharismathatSamhad,Simoncouldworktheroom.Notforoneseconddidhelookuncomfortablewiththesepeople.Hewasabletochatandmakesmalltalk,takingtotalcommandofhimself,movinginandoutofthecrowdsasifhebelongedhere.
Becausehedoes.Hemaynotalwayslikesocializing,butheplaysthegamewell.
Hergazestayedrivetedonhim,marvelingoverthispartofSimonthatshehadneverseenbefore.Themanhadsomanylayers,somanyfacetstohispersonality.
Forcingherselftostopstaringlikeacompleteidiot,KaralookedaroundforHelen,findingheratthebuffettable.
ShechattedforquitesometimewithHelen,untilherfriendwaspulledawaybyanotheracquaintance.Notwantingtoappearasthoughsheknewnooneelse-whichshedidn’t-shestrolledtoasetofornatedoors,fairlycertainthattheyledoutside,knowingtheviewwouldprobablybespectacular.
Thereweremorepeopleoutside,seatedatsmall,intimatetables.Notallofthemwereoccupied.Itwasgettinglaterandtheairwasbrisk,butitfeltgoodtoKaraafterbeinginsidethecrowdedhouseforsolong.
Shetookadeepbreathasshesteppedoutside.Therewasalightedpathinfronther,acobbledwalkwaythatappearedtoleaddowntoaboatdock.Beforeshecouldfollowthepath,aconversationrightnexttoherstoppedherinhertracks.
“Ithoughtwecouldspendsometimetogether,Simon.IsawthisdivinediamondbraceletthatI’dlovetohave.”Thefemalevoicewasartificialandsimpering.
Karadrewadeep,bracingbreath,hopingthatshewouldn’tseetheSimonthathad,justashorttimeago,leftherbreathlessinanelevator.
Sheturnedherheadslowly,knowingthatshehadtoknow.Herbreathcaughtasshetookinthebroadshoulders,thedarkhairandthesweaterthatsheknewwereSimon’s.Hewasnomorethanfivefeetaway,hisbacktoher,aslimsetofarmsaroundhisneckandperfectlymanicuredfingersrestingcasuallyagainstthenapeofhisneck.
“I’veheardaboutyour…arrangements.Iwashopingwecouldcometoanagreement.”Thesugaryvoicewasseductiveandthewoman’shandswanderedoverSimon’sshoulderslikesheownedhim
NauseabegantoriseinKara’sthroatandshemovedsoundlesslyawayfromthecoupletocreeptothesteps.Shedidn’twantSimontoseeherandshedidn’twantthenamelesswomantothinkthatshewasspyingonthem.Notthatblondiewouldprobablycare.Thewomanlookedlikeacatwithitsclawssolidlyimbeddedintosomethingitwantedandwasn’tabouttobedistracted.
Thelightwasn’tasbrightasitwasinside,butittookonlyabriefglancebackatthecoupletoseethatthewomaninSimon’sarmswaseverythingthatKarawasnot.Shewasblonde,thin,hermake-upandhairperfect.Inotherwords…sickeninglygorgeous.
Karacouldn’tmove,couldn’tfunction;hereyeswererivetedonthecoupleandherfeetfeltliketheywereembeddedincement.Shecouldhearthewomanmurmursomethingsoftly,butshecouldn’tmakeoutthewords.Cherry-redlipscurvedintoacalculatingsmilebeforetheblondegraspedthebackofSimon’shead,pullinghislipsdowntohers.
Herheartthundering,Karatookthestepsleadingdowntothepathfasterthansheshouldhaveinthin,delicateheels,needingdesperatelytogetawayfromthescenethathadbeenplayingoutinfrontofherlikeahorrormovie.Herheelsgotcaughtupinthecobblesonthepathandshekickedhershoesoff,scoopingthemupwithbarelyapause.
Breathe.Justbreathe.
Shereachedthedock,pantingandnauseated.Shegrippedthewoodenrailingonthedocktosteadyherself,tryingdesperatelytocalmherraggedbreathing.
Breathe.In.Out.In.Out.
Itdoesn’tmatter.Itdoesn’tmatter.ThesexlifeofSimonHudsonwasnoneofherbusiness.Shewasn’tcommittedtoSimonandhecertainlywasn’tcommittedtoher.Theyhadsexwithnostringsattached.
In.Out.In.Outagain.
Herbreathingsettled,butthenausearefusedtogoaway.NowonderSimonhadneverhadagirlfriend.Therewasobviouslyanendlesssupplyofwomentoentertainhim…foraprice.Anarrangement?Really?NowonderSimonhadneverhadarealrelationship.Womenusedhimandheusedwomen.Herstomachrolledandshegrippedthewoodharder.
Forgetaboutit.Itdoesn’tmatter.
Itshouldn’t…butitdid.IthurtthatSimoncouldbemakingacasualagreementtoscrewanotherwomanwhilehewasstillmakingtimewithher.Theyhadnearlyfuckedeachothertodeathafewhoursago.Orsoshethought.Maybeithadonlybeenearth-shatteringforher.Maybehemissedtyinguphiswomen,havingthemhelplessandblindfolded.Maybeheneededit.
Didyouthinkyouweresomeonespecial,thepersonwhowasgoingtohelpSimonbreakfreeofsomeofhispastinsecurities?Maybehereallydoesn’thaveany.Maybehelikeshislifeexactlyasitis.Maybeyou’rejustacompleteboneheadwhocan’tcomprehendabillionaireplayboywhocanbuyanywomanhewants.
Herthoughtsgrated,groundherdownuntilshewonderedifeverythingshehadconvincedherselfwastrueaboutSimonwasactuallyabigfatlie,aself-createdfalsehood,amansheonlyimagined.
Youdon’treallybelievethat.
“Theproblemis…Idon’treallyknowanymore,”shewhisperedsoftlytoherself,hervoicetrembling.
Herillusionswereshattered,andshehadnoideawhattobelieveinanymore.ShehadtrustedSimon,hadthoughthewasadecentbuttroubledman,andhisactionsleftherconfused,raw,andcompletelydevastated.
Shestarednumblyatthelightsthatwereblinkingovertherollingwaterandwrappedherarmsaroundhershiveringbody.HowwouldsheevererasethememoryofSimonkissingablondebombshell,awomansoperfectthatitmadeKarawonderwhatSimonhadeverbeendoingwithher?
Sheblinkedandalonetearslidsilentlydownhercheek.Mostlikely,shewouldn’tforget.Thememory,thesenseofbetrayal,andthecrushingpainwerelikelytohangaroundforquitesometime.
Lostinherthoughts,Karastoodonthedocklikeashadow,unmoving,nolongerfeelingthechill,wishingthatsheneverhadtogobackandfacereality
Shewould.Shehadto.Butshewouldavoiditaslongaspossible.“Whatevermybrotherisgivingyou,I’llgiveyoumoreifyoucometomewhenhe’sfinishedwithyou.”Thesultrymalevoicepiercedthesilencerightnexttoherear,startlinghersobadlythatshewouldhavetoppledoverthedockrailingifastrongmalehandhadn’tgrippedherwaist.“Whoa.Steady.”
Shewhippedaroundtofacethevoice,alreadyrecognizingitasSam’s.Hecrowdedher,restingonehandoneachsideofher,keepingherfromescape.
“W-Whatdidyousay?”Themanlefthercoldandshedidn’tappreciatehisfamiliarity.
“I’llpay.Whateveryouwant.Howevermuchyouwant.”Hiseyeswerecoldandsheshuddered.
Oh,God.Shewasgoingtobesick.Gulping,shestaredupatSam’sdeity-likeappearance,barelyabletobelievethathewasactuallypropositioningher
Likeaharlot.
Likeaprostitute.
Likeawhore.
Angerroseinsideherlikeaphoenix,climbinghigherandhigher,strongerandstronger.Shecouldbarelyseethroughthehazeofredthatcloudedhervisionasherbodytrembled.
“Simonwon’tmind,”Samassuredherashishandmovedtoherbareshoulder.
Hiscommentresonatedthroughher,makinghersnap.WhatthehellwaswiththeHudsonmen?Didtheythinktheycouldbuyanywomantheywantedtofuck?Shedrewherhandbackandletitfly…hard.Itconnectedwithhissmirkingfacewithasatisfyingsmackthatexplodedinthenear-silentevening,crackingthroughthepeaceofthenight.
“Maddiewasright.Youareacompletesnake,”shehissed,herbodyshakingwithrage.
“Maddie?MaddieReynolds?”Sam’sexpressionwascompleteastonishmentandshock.Shewasn’tsureifitwastheslaporthementionofMaddie’sname,butshedidn’twaittofindout.
Shepushedhisarmoutofthewayandran,deviatingfromthepathtorunacrossthewell-manicuredlawntothefrontofthehouse.
ShetoredownthedrivewayandranuntilshefoundJameswaitingpatientlyintheMercedes.Tearingthefrontdoorofthecaropen,shedoveintothefrontseat.“Pleasetakemehome,”shechokedout,tearscloggingherthroatandmakinghervoiceraspy.“Please.”
“Ms.Kara.Areyouallright?”Shecouldn’tseehisfaceinthedark,buttheconcerninthedriver’svoicewasevident.
“I’mnotfeelingwell.Ineedtogohome,”shestated,notabletokeepapleadingnotefromherrequest.
“IsthereanythingIcando?”
“Yes.Takemehome.I’llbefine.”
Shewouldn’tbefine.Notnow.Nottomorrow.Probablynotforaverylongtime.Butshedidn’ttellhimthat.
James,blesshim,didn’taskanymorequestions.Hestartedthevehicleandheadeddirectlytowardthecondo.
Karaknottedhershakinghandsaroundthesolesoftheshoesinherlap,tryingnottoletthetearsfloodinghereyesfall.Shecouldn’tcry.Therewasn’tanythingtoreallycryabout.TheHudsonmenwerejustdoingwhattheynormallydid.Shewastheonewiththeproblem.
Somehow,shehaddoneanincrediblyfoolishthing.ShehadallowedherselftofallinlovewithSimonHudson.Deeply,passionately,completelyinlove.Itwasn’tliketheloveshehadharboredforherex.Thiswasaconfusing,soul-shredding,rip-your-gutsoutlovethatwasgoingtohurt.Bigtime.
Swallowingdownabittersobbybitingherlipuntilitbled,sheturnedherheadtotheright,watchingthecityflybyasJamesdrovehercompetentlytowardhome.
You’vegottenthroughlossbefore,Kara.You’llgetthroughthis.
Sincethedeathofherparents,shehadusedencouragingwordsandpeptalkstogetherselfthroughhertoughestbattles.Theyhadalwaysworkedbefore.Hadn’tshemadeitthisfar?
You’llforgethim.Itwilljusttaketime.
Anuncomfortableweightsettledonherchest-hard,heavyandtotallycrushing.
Forthefirsttimeinherlife,KaraFosterfeltlikeshewaslyingtoherself.
“Kara!”Simonbellowedloudlyasheslammedthedoorofhiscondobehindhim,tossinghiskeyscarelesslyonthekitchencounter.
Therewasasmall,neatlywrappedpresentonthecounterwithacard,butheignoreditandracedthroughthecondolikeamanpossessed.
“Kara!”
Heyelledhernameuntilhewashoarse,buteverysingleroomwasempty.Herroomlookedbasicallyuntouched,exceptthatherbackpackwasmissing.
“Shit!”
Hewenttothekitchenandliftedthegailywrappedpackage,findingapersonalcheckfromKaraintheamountofninetythousanddollarsandasinglesheetofpaperunderthecardandgift.
I’llrepaytherestassoonasIgetajob.Ileftallofthethingsyougavemeexceptforafewpairsofjeansandacoupleofshirts.Thanksforeverything.I’llalwaysbegrateful.
Kara
What.The.Fuck.Hedidn’twantherdamngratitude.Hewanted…her.
Hecrumpledthepaperinatightfist,hisknuckleswhitefromtheeffort.
Shehadlefthim?
Noexplanation.
Nogoodbye.
Just…gone.
Hescoopedupthegiftandthesealedcard,carryingthembothtothelivingroomwhilehepouredhimselfastiffdrink.Afterknockingbackawhiskeyinonegulp,hepouredhimselfanotheranddroppedintoaleatherchair,settingthedrinkonthecoffeetablebesidehim.
Heleanedhisheadbackandclosedhiseyes,wishinghecouldgetado-overontheevening,startingwiththepartwhereheandKarahadleftthecondofortheparty.Ifhecouldhaveado-over,theywouldneverhaveleftthecondo
Hehadnearlykilledhisownbrothertonight,hadhappilybeattheshitoutofhimafterhehadfoundoutthatSamhadhitonKara.Ithadn’tbeenhardtofigureout.KarahadbeenmissingandSamhadatell-talehandprintonhisface,anobvioussouvenirfromapissed-offfemale.Furthermore,SamhadledKaratobelievethatSimonwouldn’tmindifSamfuckedhiswoman.
Granted,Samhadbeentwosheetstothewind,butSimonhadbeensooutofcontrolwhenhisbrotherhadmadehisdrunkenconfessionsthathedidn’tcare.Hehadpoundedhisbrotherintotheground,stoppingonlywhenhismothergotbetweenthetwoofthem.
Itwastheonlyphysicalfightthatheandhisbrotherhadeverhad.Samhadneverlaidafingeronhim,andSimonwouldhaveneverimaginedpunchinghisbrother.Untiltonight.UntilKara.ThethoughtofanyothermantouchingKaramadeSimoncompletelyinsane.
Ithadn’tmadeSimonfeelanybettertoknowthatKarahadrebuffedSam,bitch-slappinghimhardenoughtoleaveamark.Shehadprobablybeenscared,confused.Andshehadlefthim.Itmadehimwanttolayintohisstupid-assbrotheralloveragain.
Heopenedhiseyes,noticingthathehadcrumpledthecardinhislap.Smoothingitout,heopenedit.
Simon,
HappyBirthday!IwantedtogiveyousomethingthatIdidn’thavetobuywithyourmoney,somethingspecial.Iknowyoucollectcoins,soIthoughtofthisgift.
Thisbelongedtomyfather.Itwashisluckypenny.Hefounditontheexactsamedaythathemetmymother.Hesworeitwasonlymomentsbeforehesawherforthefirsttime.Healwayssaiditbroughthimtheluckiesteventofhislife.
I’vealwayscarrieditwithme.I’vemadeitthisfar,soIguessithasbeenlucky.
Iknowit’snotmuch,butIwantyoutohaveit.Iknowyoudon’treallyneedluck,butI’llfeelbetterknowingyouhaveit.Ihopeitalwayskeepsyousafe.
Kara
Simontoreopenthepackageandstaredlongandhardatthesmall,wornplasticcase.Hefinallypoppeditopen,andglancedattheluckycoin.
Astonished,heflippeditoverandthenoveragain.Hell,itwasa1955DoubleDieObverse.Andinverynicecondition.Hewasn’taprofessionalgrader,buthewaswillingtobetthatitwouldgradehigh.
Didthecrazywomanrealizethatshehadbeencarryingaroundsuchararecoin?Acointhatwouldprobablyfeedherforseveralmonthsifshesoldit?
Probablynot.AndheknewthatKarawouldprobablyratherdiethansellsomethingsosentimental,somethingthatbelongedtoherdad.
Butshehadgivenittohim.Shehadpartedwithsomethingextremelydeartohertogivehimabirthdaypresent.
Heclosedthecaseandgrippedthecoinhard,placingitoverhisheartaspainrippedthroughhissternum.Whyhadshepartedwiththis?Whyhadshegivenittohim?Instinctively,heknewitwasspecialtoher,sospecialthatshealwayskeptitclose.
Simonknockedbackhisseconddrinkandputthecoininhisfrontpocket.Itwouldn’tleavehispossessionuntilhecouldgiveitbacktoher.Personally.
Grabbinghiscellphone,Simondialedhissecuritymanager,Hoffman.Heansweredonthesecondring.
“Areyoutailingher?”heaskedhissecuritychiefgruffly,notbotheringwithniceties.
“Ofcourse.Iwasn’tsurewhatwasgoingon,butsheseemssettledforthenight.Goodneighborhood,decenthouse.BelongstoaDr.Reynolds,”Hoffmaninformedhim.
“Sheleft.Keepateamonhertwenty-four-seven.Iwanttoknowifshesneezes.”
“Okay,boss.Willdo.”
Simondisconnectedwithasigh.Obviouslyshehadgonetostaywithherfriend,Maddie.She’dbeokaythere.Fornow.
HehadnevertoldKara,butshehadbeenguardedeverymomentofeverydaysincetheincidentattheclinichadoccurred.Hoffman’steamraninshifts,alwayswatching,alwaysready.Thepolicehadnevercaughtthejunkieswhohadshotatherandrobbedtheclinic,andSimonwasn’twillingtotakeanychances.Karahadseentheirfaces,hadhelpedwithcompositedrawings.Untiltheassholeswerecaught,sheneededtobesafe.Simonneededtoknowthatshewouldbeokay.
Everyinstinct,everycellinhisbodywasscreamingathimtogoafterher,todragherbackoverhisshoulderifnecessary.Hewantedto,buthecouldn’twinheroverthatway.TheincidentwithSamhadobviouslyupsether.Givinghersometimewouldhelp.Haulingherbackwouldonlysettletheproblemforashorttime,andSimonwasn’tinthisfortheshorthaul.HeneededKara,hadtohaveherforever.Anythinglesswasunthinkable.
Ifsomeonehadtoldhimseveralweeksagothathewouldmeetawomanhecouldn’tlivewithout,hewouldhavelaugheduntilhisribshurt.Buthewasn’tlaughingnow.Karahadbecomehislife,andhecouldn’teventhinkaboutgoingonwithouther.
Whatkindoflifehadhelivedbeforeher?Ashethoughtaboutallofthewomenhehadfuckedinthepast,hefrowned.Womenwhohadtogethalf-drunkandbeofferedexpensivegifts,justtogivetheirbodiestohim.Theyhadbeenemptyexperiences,womenwhotoleratedhimforhismoney.Theymayhavetemporarilysatisfiedhisurgetogetoff,buttheyhadlefthimwithahugeemptinessthathehadnevereventhoughtaboutbeforehemetKara.Nowthatheknewwhatitfeltliketobewithawomanwhoactuallywantedhim,heacknowledgedthathecouldnevergoback.HeneededKaraasmuchasheneededtheairthathebreathed.Godknew,hedidn’tdeserveher,buthewouldhaveher.
Forcinghimselftohisbedroom,hestrippedoutofhisclothesandheadedforthebed.Turningaroundabruptly,heheadedbacktothepileofclothingonthefloorandfishedinthepocketofhispants.PullingoutthecointhatKarahadgivenhim,hekeptitinhisgraspandslidintobed,notsureifhecouldevensleep,butlongingforsomesortofoblivion.
HavingKaragonewastheultimatetorture.Thehousewastooquiet,tooempty.Herpresencehadbeenpalpablesinceshehadfirstarrivedandnowhecouldfeelonlytheghostofheressence,echoesofherlaugh.
Slidingthecoinunderhispillow,Simonfloppedontohisback,alreadyrestless.Heprayedforsleeptotakehimaway…butGodmusthavebeenbusybecausehelayawakemostofthenight,tryingtodecidethebestwaytogetKaraback.
Hewouldgetherback.Thatwastheonlyoption.Itwasjustamatteroffiguringouthowtoaccomplishhisgoal.
Dawnwasbreakingbeforeheslippedintoatroubledsleep,visionsofKaratormentinghiminhisdreams.
Karapulledtheheavywoodendooroftherestaurantmanager’sofficeclosedbehindherandleanedagainstitwithaheavy,brokensigh.Itwashereleventhinterviewinthelasttendays,allofwhichhadbeenacompletewasteoftime,andthisonehadn’tgoneanybetter.Noonewantedtohireastudentwhowasonlyafewmonthsawayfromgraduation.Norestaurantwantedawaitresswhowaslikelytoleavewithinsixmonthsforapositioninherchosenprofession.WhileKaracouldn’tblametheprospectiveemployersfortheirjudgment,shereallyneededafreakingjob.
Thefamiliarsoundsofclangingdishes,barkingcooks,andsharp-tonguedserversfilteredthroughhermindasshetookyetanotherwalkofshamethroughthebackhallsofanotherrestaurantthatwasn’twillingtotakeheronasevenapart-timeemployee.
Okay,itwasn’tasifshewouldstarve.Shestillhadtengrandinherbankaccount,theloanshehadgivenherselffromSimon.Bitingherlipasthepainofthinkingabouthimcrashedoverher,sheexitedthemaindooroftherestaurant,lettingherselfleanagainstthecoolbrickexteriortogatherherthoughtsafterthedisastrousinterview.
Actually,shehadmorethantenthousanddollarsinheraccount.Ninedaysago,onherbirthday,SimonhadsentseveraldeliverymenandamessengertoMaddie’shomewithalloftheitemsthatshehadleftbehind.Thedeliveryguyshadbeenloadedwithherbelongings,allofwhichhadbeenpurchasedbySimon,andthemessengercamebearingseveraldozenredrosesandanenvelopewithanote.
Kara,
Iamreturningyourcheck.Pleaseacceptthemoneyasabirthdaypresentfrommeanddon’tfightwiththedeliverypeople.Theyhavebeeninstructedtoputtheitemswhereveryouwantthemorleavethemonthedoorstep.Astheyworkforme,theywillfollowinstructions.
I’msorryaboutwhathappenedwithSam.Pleasecomehome.
HappyBirthday.Iwishwecouldspendittogether.
Yours,Simon
Karachokedbackasobandrubbedunconsciouslyatherupperthigh,feelingthestiffpaperofhisnotethatwasrestinginherfrontpocket.
I’mgoingtohavetotalktohim.
Karahadhopedthatgivingherselfalittletimemighthelpherfeelmoregrounded,lessmiredindepression.Butitwasn’tworking.Everydayshedidn’tseeSimonseemedlikeaneternity,andshewasjustfoolingherselfifshethoughtthataweekortwowouldhelphergetoverherlongingforhim.Ifanything,shesankdeeperintothedarknessaseachdaypassed.
Ihavetotalktohim.Makehimtakemycheck.WorkouttermstorepaywhatIborrowed.Returnthethingshebought.
ShehadbawledlikeababywhenshehadturnedonthelaptophehadgivenherandrealizedthatSimonhaddownloadedeverygamethatshehadeverplayedonhiscomputerlab.MythWorld-bothgames-hadbeenfirstonthelist.
Wipingfuriouslyatanescapedtearrollingdownhercheek,KaraknewshehadtostopmooningoverSimonHudson;shejustwasn’tsurehowtodoit.Thesilly,thoughtfulthingsthathedid,suchastakingthetimetodownloadallofthosegames,tuggedatherheart.Then,shewouldrememberthesightoftheblondesupermodelonSam’sporchpullingSimon’slipstohersandshe’dbepissedalloveragain.Howcouldanymanbesothoughtful,yetbesuchadogwhenitcametowomen?
“Hello,Kara.”Adeep,rumblingvoicesoundedrightnexttoher.HereyesjerkeduptodiscoverSamHudsonleaningashoulderagainstthewallnexttoher.Instinctively,shebackedupseveralsteps,puttingdistancebetweenherandamanshedidn’tlikeortrust.
Samadvanced,butleftspacebetweenthetwoofthem.
“Whatdoyouwant?”Hertonewassharpandsheputherhanduptostophimfromcominganycloser.
Heraisedhiseyebrowatherdefensivemove.“Ijustwanttotalk.”Helookedasarrogantashehadattheparty,evendressedincasualjeansandablackt-shirt,buttherewasathreadofremorserunningthroughhiswords,andhisgreeneyeswereclearandbright.“Please.”ThatadditionactuallysoundedpainfulcomingfromSam,asthoughhehadtoforceitfromhisthroat.
“Idon’tknowyouandIhavenothingtosay,”shesnippedathim,eagertogetaway.ThelastthingshewantedwastochatwithSamHudson.
“I’mnotgoingawayuntilyoutalktome,soyoumightaswelldoitnow.”
Karawantedtostompherfootinfrustration,butshewouldn’tgiveSamthesatisfaction.“Justsaywhateveritisyouhavetosayandleave.”
Hemotionedtowardtherestaurantdoor.“Icoulduseacupofcoffee.It’sbeenalongday.”
Sheshookherhead.“Ijustinterviewedthere.Ireallydon’twanttogobackinthere.”
Hewavedtotheeateryacrossthestreet.“Wecangothere.”
Rollinghereyes,sheanswered,“Beenthere,donethatone,too.Thereisn’taplaceinthisneighborhoodwhereIhaven’tinterviewed.”
Takingherarmlightly,Samledherintothefast-foodplacenextdoor.Shejerkedherarmoutofhishold,butfollowedbehindhim.Itwasobviousthatsheneededtolethimhavehissayorhewouldn’tleaveheralone.Hehadthesamestubborn,HudsonmalelookthatSimongotwheneverhewasn’tgoingtobudgeuntilsherelentedorcompromised.
TheybothorderedacoffeefromthefrontcounterandSamtookasmallboothinthecorner.Shestalled,loadinghercoffeeatasidetablewithcreamandsugarbeforejoininghim.Fingeringthedisposablecup,shefinallylookeduptofindSamwatchingherwiththeintensityofahawkreadytoswoopdownonitsprey.Squirminganduncomfortable,shestillrefusedtolookaway.Sam’sgazewasn’tsexual.Itwasasthoughhewastryingtoexamineaperplexingmicrobeunderneathamagnifyingglass.Ifhewantedtodosomeintensivesearchofherpersonality…sobeit.Itwasn’tasifshehaddoneanythingwrong,exceptfallinlovewithSimonHudson.
Interestinglyenough,Samcavedinfirst.“I’msorry.”Hedivertedhiseyesashemutteredthestatement.Itwassincere,butshecouldtellitwasn’tsomethingthismansaidveryoften.“ThatwasashittythingIdidatSimon’sbirthdayparty.IwassodrunkIcouldbarelystand,butthatisn’tanexcuse.Amanneedstoberesponsibleforhisactions,drunkornot.”
“Whydidyoudoit?Whyareyoudoingthis?DidHelensendyoutoapologize?Ididn’tmentionawordaboutwhatyoudid.I’mnotsurehowshewouldknow.”KarahadonlyspokentoHelenonce,andshehadn’tmentionedSam’sappallingbehaviorthatnighttohismother.
Samshotheradarklook.“Mymotherknowseverything,andIappreciatethefactthatyoudidn’tmentionit.Youdidn’thaveto.SimonfigureditoutandbeatthehelloutofmewhenIconfessed.Ourbarroombrawlendedthepartyratherabruptly,soonafterIcameinsideandyouleft.”Hehesitated,takingaswigofcoffee.“Andno,mymotherdidn’tsendmehere.I’mherebecauseIwanttobe.BecauseSimonismiserableandIwaswrong.Hedoesn’tknowI’mhereandwouldprobablysmashmyfaceinagainifheknewI’dapproachedyou.”Hestaredoutthewindowbesidethem.
KarasearchedSam’sface,noticingthefaintbruisesabovehislefteyeandhisrightcheek.Simonmusthavedoneajobonhisbrother.Tendaysaftertheevent,Samstillhadafaintbruisingtohisfacethatshehadn’tlookedcloseenoughtoseebefore.“Why?WhywouldSimondothat?Hewasalreadyintheprocessofliningupanotherwoman.IsawhimkissingherontheterracewhenIwalkedoutside.Itmakesnosense.”
Sam’sheadjerkedbacktoher.“Hedidn’tlineupanyone.Whatdidshelooklike?”
“Tall,thin,blonde,perfectmake-upbutshe’dprobablylookjustasgoodwithoutit.”KarafrownedatSam.“Beautiful.”
Hisheadnoddedonce.“Constance.IsawhermarchinasIwassteppingoutside.Isawyougooutontheterrace,butIgotcaughtupbyaclientforafewminutesbeforeIcouldfollowyou.Ifitmakesyoufeelanybetter,hedidn’ttakeheruponheroffer.Conniewascominginangry,andSimonwasalreadygone.”Sam’sgazedroppedtohiscup,fidgetingwiththehalf-emptycontainer.“SimonwouldneverfuckConnie.She’smarriedtoamanoldenoughtobehergrandfather,butherhusbandisn’texactlygenerouswithhismoney.Mybrotherdoesn’tdomarriedwomen.Andifhewasfu…uhh…havingarelationshipwithyou,hecertainlywouldn’tbearranginganotherone.Simonmaynotgetemotionallyinvolved,butheonlyhasonewomanatatime.”
Karasputtered,nearlychokingonhercoffee.Sam’scommentaboutSimonnotgettingemotionallyinvolvedhitherhard.ShecouldbelievethatSimonwasn’thavinganaffairwithamarriedwoman.Forsomereason,shebelievedthatjustwasn’tsomethingthathewoulddo.Simonmightnotbelieveinrelationshipsormarriageforhimself,buthejustdidn’tseemlikethetypeofmantostepoverthatline.Butreally,diditmatter?MaybeitmadeherfeelbettertoknowthatSimonwasn’ttyingup,blindfolding,andscrewingthecenterfoldwomanwhohadbeenkissinghimathisparty,butthefactthatSimondidn’tdorelationshipshadn’tchanged.ShewassoconnectedtoSimonthatshecouldbarelybreathe.Inthelongrun,shewouldendupcompletelyshatteredwhenhemovedon.“Thanksfortellingmeallofthis.Andforapologizing.”Shetriedtokeephervoiceflat,freefromemotion.
Samlookedconcerned,hiseyebrowsdrawingtogetherashelookedather.“Hecaresaboutyou.Ididn’tknoworIwouldneverhavemadeyouanoffer.”
“Whydidyou?I’msurethereareplentyofwomenwhothrowthemselvesatyoueveryday.”
“BecauseI’mabillionaire,”heanswered,histonedisgusted,hisexpressionharsh.“IsawhowhappySimonwasafteryoucametolivewithhim.I’veheardmymothertalkaboutyou.IguessIthoughtthatonceyouandSimonsplit,thatIcouldgrabalittlehappinessformyself.Iwasdrunk.Feelingsorryformyself.I’manasshole.You’rethefirstwomanmybrotherhasevercaredaboutandIbetrayedhim.AndIinsultedyou.Youdidn’tdeservethat.”
Karaleanedbackagainstthehardplasticofthetinyboothseat,stunned.“Simondoesn’tcareaboutmethatway.ButIadmit,Iwasinsulted.Youcan’tbuyanywomanyouwant,Sam.AndIdon’tbelieveitwasreallymeyouwanted.”
Samreleasedaraggedsigh.“Iwanted…something.Iguessinmydrunkenpityparty,Iwasreadytotryanything.Andthere’sonlyonewomanwhocaredaboutanythingexceptmymoneyinthepast.AndIblewit.”Hisvoicewasfilledwithanachingsadnessandremorse.“Areyougoingtoacceptmyapology?”
Thecharmingsmilewasback,lightinguphisface,bringingbacktheAdonisshehadseenattheparty.Strangely,itdidn’tbotherhernow.SamHudsonwastroubledandtheradiantsmilethathewasthrowingherwaywasnothingmorethanacoverforamanwhowantedmuchmorethanmonetarygaininhislife.Shehadseenasmallcrackinhisunemotionalfa?ade.“Yes,Iaccept.Iguessweallsayanddothingsthatwewouldn’tnormallydowhenwedrink.”HerwordsbroughtbackthedaythatshehadtoldSimonhehadanincrediblebodyandthatshewantedhimaftershehadhadafewdrinksattherestaurant.“ButI’mnotsurewhyitmatterstoyou.”
Sam’seyesgrewstormyandhegraspedherwristasshewenttoslideoutoftheboothandmakeherescape.“Kara,Simoncares.He’shadaroughtimeandhemaynotknowhowtoexpressit.Buthedoes.Pleasedon’tjudgemybrotherbecauseIwasanasshole.”
Hisdetainingholdwasgentle.Shetuggedlightlyandhereleasedher,apleadinglookinhiseyes.Dammit.Shecouldn’tleaveSamthinkingthatthiswasallhisfault.Itwasn’t.ShewasinlovewithSimonHudsonanditwouldhaveendedupadisasterevenifSamhadn’tcausedthingstofallapart.Hisactionshadonlyhastenedthebadending.“Itisn’tyou,Sam.Itisn’twhatyoudid.”Shakingherhead,shereachedforherbackpack.
“Whatisit?Tellme.I’llfixit.”Hesoundeddesperate.
Shebarkedashort,humorlesslaugh.Maybethebrothersweren’tsodifferentafterall.HesoundedjustlikeSimon.Didtheyboththinktheycouldfixanythingwithmoney?“Youcan’t.Justknowthatitisn’tyourfault.”
Nope.It’smyfaultforbeingstupidenoughtofallforSimonHudson.
“Youdon’tlikeorrespectmeatall,doyou?”Hesoundedresignedandslightlydejected.
Sheturnedherbodytowardhimasshescootedtotheedgeofherseatwithherbackpack.“Idon’tknowyouwellenoughtolikeordislikeyou.Andmoneydoesn’tbuyrespectforme.”Herlipsturnedupinaslightsmileasshesawhissurprisedexpression.“ButIdorespectyoualotforlovingyourbrother.”
Hestaredatherasheansweredgruffly,“WhosaysIlovehim?He’sapainintheassandhemessedupmyfacesobadthatIcouldn’tstepoutsidethehouseforaweek.”
Shegavehimasadsmileandplacedherhandoverhisonthetable.“I’msorry.IknowyouandSimonarecloseandIwouldneverwanttobethecauseofanyproblemsinyourrelationship.”
Samshrugged.“We’vebeenthroughtoughtimesbefore.We’llgetthroughit.”
Shepulledherhandback.“Areyouspeaking?”
Helaughedweakly.“Tradinginsults.It’sastart.”
“Doyouknowwhathappenedtohim?Howhegotscarred?”Thewordsflewfromhermouthbeforeshecouldcensorthem.
Sam’sjawdropped,hisexpressionshocked.“You’veseenhisscars?Allofthem?Isthatwhyyou’reavoidinghim?”
Angersimmeredandherpalmitchedtoslaphisfacealloveragain.“Jesus,doyouthinkeverywomanisthatsuperficial?”Tryingtogetagriponherirritation,shecontinued.“YourbrotheristhemostattractivemanIhaveevermet,scarsornoscars.He’shotenoughtomeltglaciersinAntarctica.Obviously,hesufferedaseveretraumaandIhatethatforhim.ButIdon’tgiveadamnabouthisscars.”
“Youthinkhe’sbetterlookingthanIam?”Thequestionwasarrogant,butSamsoundeddamneddelightedbythefactthatshewashotforhisbrother.
“Yes.Nocontest.Sorry.”Heranswercameoutsevere,butshewasalittletouchedbythefondlookinSam’seyes.Chewingherlip,deepinthought,shemusedaloud.“IwonderifyoucouldgiveSimonsomethingforme.”
Samshruggedandlookedatherwithcuriosity.“What?”
“Acheck.Ineedtopayhim.”
Samsnickered,hislipsformingintoawickedgrin.“Thatgood,wasit?”
“Heputmoneyinmyaccount.Iwanthimtohavemostofitback.IintendtopaybacktherestlaterwhenIgetajob.”Karaignoredhisinnuendo.Simon’sbrothermightlooklikeablondangel,butshealreadyknewthathehadasetofdevilhornshiddensomewhereinthoseloose,abundantcurls.
“YouwanttopaySimon?Newsflash…incaseyoudidn’trealizeit,he’sabillionaire.Ifhewantedyoutohavethemoney,I’mnottakingit.”Heputhishandsupintheairinadefensivegesture.“He’dreallychewmyassupandspititout.He’sinalousymood.”
Hershoulderssagging,shegavehimaflimsysmile.“Yeah.Ididn’tthinkaboutthat.Idon’twanthimmadatyou.Ijustwantedtogetitbacktohim.”
“Withouthavingtoseehim?”Samhitthenailonthehead.“Guessyou’lljusthavetodoitpersonally.”Hesoundedprettyhappyaboutthatwholeidea.
“I’dbettergetmoving.Ihavestudyingtodo.”Shestoodup.
Samroseandstareddownather.“AreyoulivingwithMaddieReynolds?Redhead?Beautiful?”Hebreathedthelasttwowordsreverently.
“Yes.”Shewassurprised.Samdidn’tsoundnearlyashostiletowardMaddieasherfriendwastowardSam.
“Howisshe?”Hewastryingtosoundnonchalant,buttherewasabriefglintofpaininhishoodedeyes.
Karahesitated,notwantingtobetrayMaddie.“She’sgood.Shehasaprivatepracticeanddoessomeworkinafreechildren’sclinic.”
“Shemadeit.Shegraduatedfrommedicalschool.”Sam’sanswerwasquiet,almostasifheweretalkingtohimself.HesoundedlikeheadmiredMaddie.
“Yep.OneofthebestandkindestphysiciansI’veevermet.Andanawesomefriend.”SamlookedlikehewantedtoaskmorequestionsthatKaradidn’tcaretoanswer,soshescootedinfrontofhimandheadedforthedoor.“Takecare,Sam.Bye.”Shedroppedheremptycupinthetrashwithoutbreakingherstrideandpushedontheheavyglassdoor.
ItwasdarkasKaraslidoutside,heavingalargesighofreliefasthelightwindhitherintheface.
EverythingandnothinghadchangedasaresultofherconversationwithSam.WhileshewasverygladthatSimonhadn’tsetupaliaisonwiththewomanattheparty,itdidn’talterthefactthatshewasjusttooemotionallyinvolvedwithamanwhodidn’tdorelationships.Itwaseithergoingtohurtnowordestroyherlater.SimonwaskindandSamhadsaidthatSimoncaredabouther.Maybeitwastrue,butitwasn’tenough.
Pleasecomehome.
ThatlinefromSimon’sletterechoedinherheadasafistclenchedaroundherheart,makingithardtobreathe.OhGod,howshewantedtogohome,backtoSimon.Theyhadstarted…something.Hehadtrustedher,lethertouchhisnakedflesh,letherseehisscars,fuckedherwithoutrestraints.Howshewishedshehadthecouragetofinishit,helpSimonfindfreedomfromhispast.Butherself-preservationinstinctwasfierce,warningherawayfromdanger,lettingherknowthatinhelpingSimon,lovingSimon,shewoulddestroyherself
Shesetheremotionallyspentbodyinmotion,headingtowardMaddie’shouse.Lostinthought,herspiritslow,shewasn’tveryawareofhersurroundings.ThatwasamistakethatKara,awomanwhohadbeenraisedinalessthandesirablearea,usuallydidn’tmake.Thelackofconcentrationbitherintheass.
Twomenapproachedquickly,oneoneachside.Herarmswereseizedandshewasbeingdraggedalongthesidewalkbeforesheevenrealizedwhathadhappened.Shestruggled,kickingoutatthebrutalmenwhowerehaulingherforcefullyforward,tryingtowrenchherarmsfromtheirgrips.Withstartledhorror,sherealizedthattheywerepushinghertowardadarkvehicleatthecurb,thebackdooropen,readytoclaimher.
Itwasdark,buttheareawaslitjustenoughtoseethefacesofthetwomenwhohadbrokenintotheclinic.
They’llkillme.I’lldie.Havetofight.
Shescreamedwithoutpause,tryingtomakehervoicecarrytoanyonewhowasinthearea,asshekickedout,tryingtohitvulnerableplacesonthetwohulkingmales.
“Shutthefuckup,bitch,”amenacing,forebodingvoicegruntedasherfootconnectedwithhiskneecap,anactionthatearnedherapunchtotheface.
Momentarilystunnedfromthepowerfulblow,shefalteredastheyshovedherforward.
Fight,damnit.Fight.
Asthejunkiesheftedherbodytotossherintothecar,sheraisedherlegsandplantedherfeet,oneonthedoor,theotheronthebodyofthecarnexttotheopenentrance.
Don’tletthemgetyouintothecar.Ifyoudo,you’redead.
Herfeetslipped,slidinglowerasoneofthemengrabbedherbythehairandstartedslammingherheadagainstthemetaltopoftheopendoor.Shecouldhearthehorrificsoundofherskullcrackingagainststeelandherheadswam,hervisionstartingtoblur.
IshouldhavetoldSimonthatIlovedhim.
Shewasstillscreaming,butthesoundweakenedasthemencontinuedtheirruthlessattempttorenderherunconscious.
“Fuckingbastards!”Anothermalevoicesounded,onethatsherecognized.
Amusculararmwrappedaroundherwaist,yankingherawayfromthetwothugs.Shewasquicklyjerkedbackagainstahardchest,herheadspinninglikeshewasonatilt-a-whirl.Lookingup,hervisionspinning,shecouldmakeoutSamHudson’sfuriousfaceasheloweredhergentlytothesidewalkandsprintedbacktothecar.
PanicroseassherealizedthatSamwasgoingtotakeonthetwomenbyhimself.Amazingly,themenlookedunsureofwhattodo.Samwasslightlylarger,butthereweretwoofthem.
Gottahelphim.Gottagetup.
Shecouldn’tletSamgetkilledafterhehadsavedherlife.Karacametoherknees,tryingdesperatelytofightherobscuredvision.Unabletostand,shestartedtocrawljustasSamengagedthefirstman,landingpunishingblowstohisface.
Poundingfeetapproached,hittingthepavementbesideher.Twomenshedidn’trecognizeenteredthefray,grabbingSam’sarmandsubduingthemanwhoSamwashammeringon.
“Don’thurtSam,”shewhimpered,afraidtheymightinjureSamintheconfusion.
“Sorry,sir.Didn’trecognizeyou.”ThemanreleasedSam’sarm.
Onebadguywasonhisstomachonthesidewalk,withoneofthenewcomersthathadenteredthefrayontopofhim.Theotherbadguywasscramblingintothedriver’sseatofthecar,agunwavingwildlyatSamandherotherrescuer.
“No.No.”Tearswereflowingdownhercheeks,herheartslammingagainstherchestasshesilentlypleadedwithSamandtheotherinnocentmannottoprovokethejunkiewiththegun.
Samlunged,butthemanhadalreadyhitthegasandthedarkvehiclespedintothenight,thedooryankingclosedasheflewdownthestreet,disappearingalmostasfastasshecouldblink.
Herterrifiedeyesrakingoverthescene,shesawthatthetworescuersandSamwereunharmed,thoughSamwasreleasingastreamofobscenitiesasheracedtoherside.
“Kara!Areyouok?Fuck!Yourheadispouringblood.Whatwereyoudoing?”Samgentlyloweredhertothesidewalktorestonherback.Hecontinuedtowhispersoothingwordsashepushedherhairfromherface.
“Wantedtohelpyou,”sherasped,herthroatdry.
“Crazywoman.”Samshookhishead,buthisvoicewaslightandsweet.Then,inaharsh,boomingvoiceheordered,“Getanambulance.Now.She’shurt.”
Darknessstartedtoencroachonhervisionandshestruggled,determinednottoloseconsciousness.“TellSimon…”Hervoicetrailedoff,hermouthsodrythathertonguewasstickingtotheroofofhermouth.Hereyelidsfluttered.ShetriedtofocusonSam,buthebecamejustalarge,unfocusedblur.
ShesighedasSamclaspedherhandandgrumbled.“Youcantellhimyourself.He’sonhiswayandpissedashell.”
Simon’scoming?
HerheartskippedabeatandshegaveSam’shandafeeblesqueezeasahummingnoisestartedinherhead.Itgrewlouder,soloudthatshecouldbarelymakeoutthesoundofapproachingsirensthatwerescreamingthroughthenight
“Kara.Areyoustillwithme?”Sam’svoicesoundedpanickedanddesperate.Anddistant.
Ablanketofdarknesscompletelyconsumedherasthelow-pitcheddroningsoundinherheadreachedtheverytopofitscrescendo.
“Simon.”Shewhisperedhisname,notknowingifitwasevenaudible,assheslidintocompletedarknessandblessedsilence.
~*~TheEnd~*~Karaopenedhereyesslowly,blinkingseveraltimestoclearherblurredvision,andfeelinglikeherheadwasinavise.Temporarilydisoriented,sheliftedherhandtoherhead,pokingatitexperimentally,onlytofeelherforeheadwrappedwithgauze.Whatthehell?
Hermemoryreturnedslowly,tricklingbackinbitsandpieces.Samandhisapology.Theattack.Samandtwootherunknownmensavingherlife.
SherememberedwakingbrieflyseveraltimesintheEmergencyRoom,Simonrightnexttoher,holdingherhand,murmuringencouragingwordswhileshe…ohGod…hadshereallythrownupalloverhim?
Rightaftertheattack,everythinghadbeensointense:thedizziness,thenausea,theblurredvision,thedesiretoescapebackintothedarknessandblissfulreliefofsleep.
Hersurroundingsweredim,theonlylightilluminatingwhatappearedtobeahospitalroomwithasmallsquareandnarrowoverheadlightnearthedoor.
Hereyesscannedtheroom.Itwassetupfordoubleoccupancy,butthebedbesideherwasemptyandcompletelyundisturbed.
ComparedtothewayshehadfeltintheEmergencyRoom,theheadacheshewasexperiencingseemedlikeamajorimprovement.Herstomachwasslightlyqueasyandshehadobviouslysufferedanopenwoundtoherforehead,butshewasstillalive.Shesuckedinadeep,tremulousbreath,releasingitslowlyasawaveofadrenalinewashedoverherbody;clearlyshewasexperiencingsomedelayedanxietyfromtheexperiencethathadhappened…uh…when?
Crap…Ireallyneedtogetmyheadtogether!
Squintingattheclock,shecouldseethatitwasfoura.m.Ninehourshadpassedsincetheterrifyingexperiencethathadleftheraloneinahospitalroom,thankingtheAlmightythatshewasstillamongtheliving.
Sheflinchedasshemovedherleftarm,stretchingthetubingoftheI.V.insertedinthebackofherhand,causingstressattheinsertionsite.Damn,thathurt.Replacingthelimbtoitsformerposition,sheattemptedtocautiouslystretchherotherarm,findingittrapped,encapsulatedinsidealarge,strong,warmprison.
“Simon,”shewhisperedsoftly,suddenlyrealizingthatshewasn’talone,hereyeslandingontheplacewheretheirskintouched,findinghisfingersentwinedwithhers,hisheadrestingnexttotheirjoinedhands,hiseyesclosed.
Herheartcontractedashergazesweptoverhim,takingineveryfeatureofhisbeloved,handsomeface.Shedrankinthesightofhim,feelingasifithadbeenforeversinceshehadseenthathandsomeface.Eveninsleep,helookedtenseandfierce,thelockofwaywardhairthatslitheredoverhisforeheadtheonlythingthatsoftenedhisappearanceinslumber.
Slowlydisentanglingtheirentwinedfingers,shestrokedhishairback,enjoyingthetextureofthethick,disheveledstrandsbetweenherfingers.
Hadhebeenhereallnight?Hadheeverleftthehospital?
Hewasdressedinapairoflightbluehospitalscrubs,asuresignthathermemoryoftossinghercookiesdownthefrontofwhatwasprobablyaveryexpensivesweaterwasprobablyaccurate.
Iloveyou.
Therecollectionthatshehadspokenthosewordsbetweenretchingviolentlyandfeelinglikeshewasabouttodiemadeherhandstoppawinghishairandherbodytensewithtrepidation.
OhGod,didIreallysaythosewordstohim?
Yeah,shehadsaidthem-thememoryflashedvividlyinhermind.Knowingthatshehadbabbledthatparticularphrasetohim,shepulledherhandcompletelyaway,wonderinghowhehadtakenthosewords,orifhehadevenreallyheardthem.Atthetime,shehadbeendesperatetosaythem,tolethimknowhowshefeltincaseshedidn’tmakeitthroughthenight.Withnoideawhatherinjuriesactuallywere,shehadn’thesitatedtosaythem,didn’twantsomethingtohappenwithouthimknowinghowmuchshecared.
Nowthatsheknewthatshewasobviouslygoingtolive,shewasn’tsosurethatsheshouldhaveconfessed,baredhersoul.
“Kara!”Simonshotupintoasittingposition,hishandreachingreflexivelyforhers,twiningtheirfingersbacktogether.Hewasinstantlyawake,hiseyesjerkingtoherface,scanningitwithobviousunease.“You’reawake.”
Herthroatwasdry;hertonguefeltlikeitwasswollenenoughtotakeuptheentirespaceofheroralcavity.Shereachedforacupofwaterfromthebedsidetable.Simonsprangfromhischair,reachingitfirst,unwrappingastrawandplacingitintotheplasticcup,beforedirectingittohermouth.Shetookslowsips,herhandcoveringhisassheletthemoistureslideoverhertongue.“WhereamI?”sheaskedquietly,lickingthemoisturefromherlips.
HetoldherwhathospitalwassheinandexplainedthatherCTscanwasnormal,butthattheywerekeepingherovernightforobservation.“Youhaveseveralstitchesfromacutonyourforehead.FromwhatSamtoldme,you’redamnluckytheydidn’tcrackyourskull.”Simon’svoicewasroughandslightlyirritated.
“Ihaveahardhead,”sheansweredlightly,rememberingtheforceoftheblows,amazedthatshehadsufferednothingmorethanafewstitchesandahammeringheadache.
Heshotheranaggravatedlook.“LikeIhaven’tnoticed?”Settingtheglassdownonthebedsidetable,hiseyeslockedwithhers,staringintently,hisgazelikeliquidfire.“You’reneverleavingmeagain.Ever.”
Herbreathhitchedasshelookedathim,fascinated,unabletobreakthecompelling,silentcommunication.“Foreverisalongtime,”sheanswered,unabletocomeupwithamoreintelligentresponsewhilehiseyeswereshootingvolatilesparks,aclearwarninghewasabouttogetstubborn.
“Idon’tgiveafuck.You’regoingbackhomewithme,andI’mnotleavingyoursafetyinthehandsofafewgreensecurityagents.IfSamhadn’tbeenthere…”
“Hesavedmylife,Simon.Yourbrotherriskedhislifeforme,”shemurmured,silentlythankingSamforbeingthere,forgettingtoherbeforethosemenhadgottenherintothecar.
I’dbedeadifhehadn’t.
Runningafrustratedhandthroughhisalready-torturedhair,hegrowled,“Hedamnwellshouldhaveseenyouhome.Andthesecurityguyswereinexperienced.Theyshouldhavebeentailingyousoclosethattheycouldhearyoubreathe.Theirreactiontimewasunacceptable.”
“Ileft.Ididn’tgiveSamachancetooffertotakemehome.HewasaskingquestionsaboutMaddieandIwantedtoleave.Andtheagentsgottherefast.Theseguyswerequick.Itallhappenedinseconds.”Eventhoughitseemedlikehours.
“Samshouldn’thavebeenthereatall.Youwouldhavebeenhomeandsafe,”herumbled,hischestvibratingwithemotion.
Shesqueezedhishand.“Youdon’tknowthat.Theymighthavegottentomeanyway.ItwouldhavebeenworseifSamhadn’tbeenthere.Pleasedon’tblameSamortheagents.I’mgratefultoallofthem.”
“Doesn’tmatter.You’recominghomewithmetomorrow.Andyou’llhavebettersecuritythanthepresidentoftheUnitedStates.EvenMaddieagreesthatyou’resaferatthecondo.AlthoughI’mnotsureshe’sthrilledaboutyoubeinginsuchcloseproximitytoanyHudson.”Hesatbackdowninthechairwithoutreleasinghispowerfulgriponherhandorsofteninghisintense,relentlessstare.
“Maddiewashere?”sheaskedcuriously,wonderinghowherfriendevenknewthatshehadbeeninjured.
“Shejustleftanhourortwoago.Icalledher.Shewashereallevening.Youdon’tremember?”
Sheshookherhead.“Everythingthathappenedaftertheactualattackisjustsnippetsofmemory.DidIreallyvomitonyou?”
“Yourememberthat?”Hesearchedherface,lookingforsomething,asthoughheweretryingtofigureoutwhatshedidanddidn’tremember.“Maddiefoundmeapairofscrubsandashowerafteryougotsettledinaroom.”
“OhGod.I’msorry.”WasthereanythingmoremortifyingthanpukingalloveramanlikeSimonHudson?
“Why?Youdidn’tdoitonpurpose.AndIwasactuallyrelievedthatyouwereawake.”
Karafounditprettydamnamazingthatamanhadactuallystoodbesideher,holdinganemesisbasinwhilesheheaved,withoutbeingcompletelygrossedout.“IsSamallright?”
“Fine.”Hebarkedashort,humorlesslaugh.“ExceptforthefactthathehadtobeinthesameroomwithMaddieReynolds.SamlookeduncomfortableashellandMaddielookedlikeshewantedtokillhim,slowlyandpainfully.”
“IwishIknewwhathappenedbetweenthem,”shebreathedwistfully,wincingasthesqueezingsensationinherheadincreasedinintensity,beginningtofeelasifshehadahugeboaconstrictorwrappedaroundherhead.
Simonfrowned.“Youwantsomepainmedication?Icancallthenurse.”Hereachedforthecallbutton.
“No.Wait.”Shetookadeepbreath,knowingshehadtosetSimonstraight.Goingbacktothecondowithhimwasn’tanoption.“Ican’tgohomewithyou,Simon.I’llgobacktoMaddie’s.I’llbefine.Theycaughtoneguyandtheotheroneisprobablyrunningscared.Idoubthismainconcernistocomeafterme.”
Hisbodytensed,thepressureonherhandincreasingashisfingersclenchedandreleased,hiseyesshootingheradangerousglance.“Thematterisn’tupfordebate.You.Are.Coming.With.Me,”heansweredwithagrowl.
Shereleasedafrustratedbreath.“Youaren’tmykeeper.Idon’tneedone.I’vebeenaloneforalongtime.”Andlonely,missingSimon,althoughshehadn’tknownwhoshewasmissingatthetime.
ThepainwashorrificwhenIwasawayfromhim.Ican’tgothroughanothergoodbyelater.Spendinganymoretimewithhimisdangerous.Itwilljusthurttwiceasmuchtopartfromhimafterspendingmoretimewithhim,makingmorememoriestotorturemyselfwithwhenI’maloneagain.
“Yeah…well…getusedtohavingcompany,sweetheart,”hesnorted,hiseyesgleamingwithpossession,hisexpressionrawandferal.“Aslongasyou’reindanger,Iwon’tbeveryfaraway.Andyouwon’tbewithoutprotection.”
Sheshuddered,tryingtopullherhandfromhisfiercegrip.Hewasn’thurtingherandhisgraspwasn’ttightenoughtomakeheruncomfortable.Itwasactuallyjusttheopposite.Simonmadeherfeelsafe,andthatterrifiedher.Therewasnopossiblewayshecouldletherselfgetusedtobeingtreatedlikeshewasactuallyawomanhecherished.“Youcan’ttellmewhattodo.We’veonlyknowneachotherforahandfulofweeks.Whyareyouconcerningyourselfaboutmysafety?”Hervoicewasrough,emotional,andprobablyslightlypanicky.Sheneededtodistanceherself,butitwasdifficult.Needyandrawafterherexperiencethenightbefore,shewantednothingmorethantothrowherselfintoSimon’sarmsandlethimholdherthere,safeinhiswarmmasculineembraceuntilsherecoveredherequilibrium.
“Yoursafetyhasbeenmyconcernforoverafuckingyear!”heblastedbackather,hisvoicelowandhusky.“Andtherehasn’tbeenadaythathaspassedinallthattimewhenIhaven’tbeencompletelyobsessedwithwhetherornotyouweresafe.”
“Butwejustmetafewweeksago…”Hervoicewasbarelyaudible,confused.
Heblewoutanunevenbreath,hisfaceravagedwithuncertaintyashelookedaway,staringblanklyatthesterile,whitewallinfrontofhim.“Momtalkedaboutyouallthetime.Shepointedyououttomeoverayearagowhileyouwereservingintherestaurant.”Hesighed,asthoughresignedtocompletinghisexplanation.“Ican’treallyexplainitbecauseIdon’tunderstanditmyself,butfromthatmomenton,Ifeltcompelledtolookoutforyou.Fuck,Ievenfollowedyouhomeeverynightjusttomakesureyougottoyourapartmentsafely.”
Stunned,sheaskedinahesitantvoice,“LikeIwasyourfriendbecauseIwasafriendofyourmother’s?”
Heturnedhisheadandgaveherheated,masculinelook.“No.LikeagoddamnobsessionthatIcouldn’tcontrol.Likeyou’reminetoprotect.”HehitherwithhisI-want-to-fuck-you-until-you-screamstare,theheatrollingfromhiminwaves.
ShoulditbotherherthatSimonhadbeenwatchingher,followingherlikeapseudostalker?Maybeitshould,butitdidn’t.Instead,shefelteerilycalm,herheartmeltinginsideherchestasshewatchedhistorturedexpression.Hehadstayedinthebackground,silentlywatchingoverherlikeadarkguardianangel,neverexpectinganythinginreturn.ThinkingbackonherconversationwithHelenattherestaurant,shewasrelievedtoseethatSimon’sprotective,rescuerinstinctswerestillintact.“Whyme?Theremustbetonsofwomenwhocoulduseyourprotection.”
Simonshrugged,buttheintenselookonhisfacewasfarfromnonchalant.“Ihavenoidea.You’retheonlywomanwho’severmademefeelthisway.”Hechokedoutthelastfewwords,obviouslydamnunhappyabouthisinabilitytocontrolhisactions.
Sheshookherheadgently,stilltryingtocometotermswiththefactthatSimonhadbeentryingtoprotectherforthelastyear.Really,whatsortofguydidsomethinglikethat?Whatgorgeousbillionairetookthetimetocheckonthesafetyofanobody,awomanwhokeptalowprofile,awomanwhoshouldhavebeenfarbeneathhisnotice?Shedidn’tthinkherselfbeneathanyonesimplybecauseshewaspoor…butrealitywasreality.MenofSimon’sstatussimplydidn’tnoticewomenlikeher.Theyweretoobusyaccumulatingmorewealth,beingkingoftheirempires.“LookingoutformebecauseIwasyourmother’sfriendwasverykindofyou.Butyoucan’tprotectmeforever.”
Hegotupfromhischairslowlyandseatedhimselfgentlyonthebed,facingher.“Youdon’tgetit,doyou?I’mnottheleastbitkind.”Hiswordsbeliedhisactionsashecarefullytuckedastrandofhairbehindherear,hisindexfingertrailinglightlyoverhertempleandstrokingoverhercheek,assoftasafeather.“Mybehaviorwasn’tmagnanimousorunselfish.Iwantedtofuckyou.Ithinkthat’saprettydamnself-servingmotivation.”Histonewasdry,self-mocking.
Shebitbackasmile,wonderingwhyhealwayshadsuchanaversiontosomeonecallinghimkind.“Ifthatwasyourmotive,thenwhydidn’tyou?Youcouldhavemadeyourpresenceknown,askedyourmomtointroduceus.Ithinkit’sprettyobviousthatI’mattractedtoyou.”Morethanattracted.
Hejerkedhishandawayfromherface,avertinghiseyes.“Iforgotaboutyourpainmedication.I’msureyou’rehurting.”Heslappedthecallbuttonforthenurse.
Aresponsecameimmediatelyfromthesmallspeakerattachedtothecallbutton.“CanIhelpyou?”Thevoicesoundedyoungandfemale.
“Ms.Fosterneedssomepainmedication.”Simon’sanswerwasabrupt;hecametohisfeetashespatouttheorder.
“Someonewillberightthere,”thefacelessvoiceansweredasthecalllightwentfromredtoblack.
Kara’sheadwasstillspinningfromhisbrusquedismissal-orwasitavoidance?-ofherquestion.Shetippedherheadbacktolookathisface.Hewasscowlingdownather,hisfaceimplacable.
Crossingherarmsinfrontofher,shemethisferociouslookwithasmallsmile.“Thattacticwon’tworkonmeanymore,”shetoldhimquietly.
“Whattactic?”herumbled,hisarmscrossingjustlikehers,challengingher,hisexpressionunreadable.
“TheonewhereI’msupposedtofeellikeI’mLittleRedRidingHoodandyou’rethebig,badwolf.”Sheliftedaneyebrow,refusingtolookawayfromhisdisgruntledface.SimonHudsoncouldscowl,growl,andsnarlallhewantedto,butshehadhisnumber.Somewherebeneathhisgruff,bossyexterior,therewasalayerofcompassionandbenevolencethathewouldprobablynevershowtotheworld.Butshesawit;sherecognizedit.Ifhehadreallyjustwantedtoscrewher,hecouldhavecomeforward,metherinperson.Itwouldhavesavedhimvaluabletime.
Heleaneddownslowly,soslowlythatherbreathseized,asthosemoltendarkeyesglintedwithtinyflamesandfocusedintentlyonher,makingherwanttosquirm.Herbodyquivered,thewavesofintensemasculinitythatwerepulsatingaroundhermakingherbodyreact.Hismouthloweredtoherear,theheatofhisbreathheavyagainstherneckandthesideofherface.“Don’tbesosurethatI’mnotthebig,badwolf,littlegirl.I’dgobbleyouupinaheartbeat.”Hislow,menacingvoicesentashiverdownherspine,butnotfromfear.Longingslammedintoherbodywithhurricaneforce.
Herpent-upbreathescapedinatremuloussighasthenurseenteredtheroom,forcingSimontostraightenupandmoveawayfromthebed.Theefficient,middle-agedwomangaveKarahermedicationandtookhervitalsigns.Afterdoingaquickassessment,thewomanleft,onlyafteraskingiftherewasanythingelseKaraneededandgettinganegativereply.
“I’msurprisedthatIdon’thavearoommate,”shemutteredquietlyafterhernursehaddeparted.“Thishospitalisusuallyprettybusy.”Shehaddoneclinicalsatthefacilityandatthistimeofyear,theroomsweregenerallyfilledassoonastheywerevacated.
Simonflippedhischairaroundandsatinitbackwards,hisforearmsrestingcasuallyalongthewoodenback.Forthefirsttimesinceshe’dopenedhereyes,hegrinned.
“Therearesomebenefitstobeingabillionairewhojusthappenstobeagenerousdonortomedicalcharities.”Thechairwasclosetothebed,histeasingeyescloseenoughtobevisibleinthemutedlight.
“Soyouaskedforaprivateroombecauseyoudonate?”Herlipstwitched,butshetriedtomakehervoiceadmonishing.
Heshrugged.“Notme.SamtookcareofitwhileIwastakingashower.AndIdoubtheasked.”
Sherolledhereyes,positivethatSamHudsonrarelyaskedforanything.Hedemanded,expectingpeopletodoashecommanded.However,justlikeSimon,Samhidatenderheartunderlayersofice.
Hereyesgrewheavyasthepowerfulmedicationstartedtokickin.Yawning,shefeltSimon’shandclasphers,histhumbrunninglooselyupanddownherpalm.“Painmedication.I’mnotusedtoit,”shemurmured,suddenlyfeelingexhausted.
“Sleep.I’llbehere,”herepliedinahusky,concernedvoice.
“Youshouldgohomeandsleep.You’vebeenhereallnight.I’mfine.”
“I’mnotleavinguntilyoucancomehomewithme,”heanswered,histoneadamantandinflexible.
“Notcominghomewithyou,”shegrumbledashereyelidsfluttered.
“We’llsee.Justsleep.”Histonewassoothing,pacifying.
Andshewasn’tfooledforonesinglesecond.He’dtrytobulldozeoverherlater.
Nothavingthestrengthorthedesiretofightwithhimatthatmoment,sheslept.
Laterthatmorning,Simontappedeveryresourcehehadtoconvinceherthatgoinghomewithhimwasthebestoption.
ShereceivedvisitsfromMaddie,Helen,Sam,herattendingphysician,andDetectiveHarris,eachpersonstressingtheimportanceofherbeinginasafeenvironment,andnamingSimon’scondoasthemostsecureplaceforhertostay.Maddiegavehertheadvicegrudgingly,obviouslynotverykeenontheidea,buttryingtoconsiderthebestoptionforKara’ssafety.
WonderhowmuchhehadtobullyDetectiveHarrisandherattendingphysiciantogetthemtoagreethathishomewasthesafest?
Privately,Simontoldherifshedidn’tintendtogowithhim,he’dthrowheroverhisshoulderanddragherbacktohiscondo,kickingandscreamingifnecessary.
Itwasn’thisthreatorthefactthatshereallyhadnowhereelsetogothatconvincedhertogetintotheMercedesandletJamesdrivethemhometothecondo.Intheend…itwastheexhausted,wild,franticlookinhiseyeswhilehemadethedemandthatswayedher.
Honestly,helookedlikehehadn’tsleptindays:hisfiveo’clockshadowdark,hishandsomefacemarkedheavilywithstressandweariness.
He’sscared.Worriedaboutme.
Herchestachingwithtenderness,unabletolethimgoonfreakingoutabouther,shecavedinandlethimtakeherhome.
She’dworryaboutheradditionalpainlater,whenitcametimetoleaveagain.Fornow,shewantedSimontorelax,sleep,andeat.
Screwherfearsofhurtinglater.ThelookofdespaironSimon’sfacehurtmorethananypainshewouldsufferinthefuture.
I’lljusthavetosuckitup!
Really,whatotheroptiondidshehave?ShecouldwatchSimonsuffer,orshecouldworryaboutthepainlater.
Shechosethesecondoption,therelievedlookonhisfacewortheverybitofhurtshewouldsufferinthefuture.AfewnightslaterfoundSimontossingandturninginhismassivebed,unabletosleep.Rollingontohisback,frustratedandpissed-off,hestaredupattheceiling,hiseyeswideopenwhentheyshouldbeclosed,catchinguponlostsleep.Shit!Hehadn’tsleptmorethanafewhourseverynightsincetheeveningthatKarahadlefthim.Nowthatshewasback,hewasstillrestless.
Iloveyou.
HerwhisperedconfessionintheEmergencyRoomhauntedhimeveryfuckingminuteofeveryday.Hadshemeantit?Hadsheevenbeentalkingtohim?Shehadbeenconfused,disoriented,barelyawareofhersurroundings.Therewasnoevidencethatsheevenrememberedspeakingthosewords,sohowdidheknowwhoshemeantthemfor?Maybeitwasjustmindlessbabble,broughtonbyherinjuries.Hedidn’tevenknowifhewantedthosewordstobeintendedforhim.
Oh,hellyeah,Ido.
Groaningsoftly,heshovedanotherpillowunderhishead,tryingtoignorehisswollencockasitpulsatedbeneaththesheets,creatingalargetentunderneaththecoverings.Christ,couldheeverthinkaboutKarawithouthisballsturningblue?
Actually,yeah,heknewhecould.Scaredshitlessaftertheattack,hiscockhadn’tbeenhisprimaryconcern.Seeingherappearsofragile,pale,andhelplessinahospitalbedhadnearlydestroyedhim,makinghimacheinotherareasabovehiswaist.Forseveraldays,hisdrivingneedtoprotecther,tokeephersafe,hadbeenhisprimarymotivation.
Hislipsturnedupinasmallsmileasherememberedheroutrageoverthefactthathehadcontactedthecollege,explainingthesituationandgettingherabsencefortherestoftheweekapproved.Hehadthoughthewasbeinghelpful,smoothingthingsoversoshehadtimetorecover.Hiscrazywomanhadactuallythoughtshewasgoingtoreturntoclassesthedayaftershewasdischargedfromthehospital,andshehadrakedhimoverthecoalsforinterferinginherlife.Shehadgottenrightupinhisfaceandrippedhimanewasshole.Karahadnoproblemchallenginghim,andhefoundherintelligentmindprovocative.Maybe-justmaybe-partofhimenjoyedit.Hadawomaneveropposedhim,questionedhim,calledhimoutforabehaviorshedidn’tlike?Thewomeninhislifeusedhim,lethimusetheirbodies.Noneofthemhadevercaredenoughtogetinhisfaceaboutanything.
She’sgettingtome.Bad.
Hecouldfeelhisinternalwallsbeginningtocrumbleanditwasn’tacomfortablesensation.
Fuck.Pay.Moveon.
Itwasthewayhehadinteractedwithwomenhisentireadultlife,butKarawaschangingallthat,temptinghimtotrusther.Andfuck,hewastempted.Itmightbeexcruciatinglypainfulwhenhereyesboredintohimasthoughshewerepeeringintohissoul,butknowingthatshecaredenoughtodoit?Thatwasintoxicating,bewitching.
Shedidn’tgiveashitabouthisscars,hismoney,orelevatedsocialstatus.
AndshethinksI’mhotenoughtomeltglaciersinAntarctica.
SamhadtoldhimabouthisconversationwithKara,howshehaddeclaredSimonthehottestHudson.Heandhisbrotherhadneverbeencompetitive.Theyhadalwaysbeentoobusyworkingtogethertosurviveandthentothrive.Althoughtheylikedtoverballyspar,Simonlovedhisbrother.Fiercely.Yeah,Samwasfucked-upwhenitcametowomen,buthecouldhardlychastisehisbrotherforthatwhenhewasjustasbad.Probablyworse.However,hehadgottenperversesatisfactionfromknowingthatKarahadverballyslappedSamdownduringherconversationwithhimatthefast-foodplacebeforetheattack.
Iloveyou.
Grittinghisteeth,herolledtohisside,punchinghispillowandtryingtogetcomfortable.Hehadtoforget,getagriponhisemotions,stopwishingformorethanherpresence.Hehadthecomfortofknowingshewassafe.Wasn’tthatenough?Atleasthewasn’tgoinginsanefromnotknowingwhereshewas,ifshewasokay.
Apiercing,terrifiedfemalehowlmadeSimonshootstraightupinbed,hismusclesclenched,hisheartracing.
Kara!
Panicheldhiminitsgripforafewsecondsasthescreamsgrewlouder,moreintense.
Hisfeethitthefloor,protectiveinstinctmakingadrenalinepumpthroughhisbodyasheraceddownthedarkhallwaytoherroom.Flippingonthelightwithoutevenbreakinghisstride,hehaltedabruptlyatthesideofherbed.
Herarmswerewrappedprotectivelyaroundherself,tearsflowinglikeariverdownhersweetface.Hairtangled,headdown,shewaswhimperingandgaspingforbreath.
“Sweetheart,whathappened?”Hesatnexttoheronthebed.Hersheetsweresnarledandtwisted,asthoughshehadbeenfightingWorldWarIIIonhermattress.
“Dream,”shewhispered,asthoughstilltryingtoconvinceherself.“Justadream.”
Shewasshiveringviolently.Hescoopedherupandplacedherinhislap,pullingherunresistingbodyintohis,tryingtowarmherinhisembrace.Heartracing,heenfoldedher,pullingherheadintohisneck.
“Whatwereyoudreamingabout?”Hestrokedhersilkyhair,lettingitslideoverhisfingertips,ashetookadeepbreath,tryingtocalmhishammeringheart.
“Theattack.Itwassoreal,”shemurmured,shudderingagainsthim.
“It’sover.You’resafe.You’llalwaysbesafe.”Righthere.Withme.
Slidingheroffhislap,hewenttostand,onlytohaveherarmstightenaroundhisneck,holdingonfordearlife
“No!Please!Don’tgoyet.”Hervulnerablecrystabbedhimstraightinthegut.
Sheneedsme.
Andhewasgoingtobethereforher,insecuritiesbedamned.“It’sokay.I’mnotleavingyoualone.”I’mneverleavingyoualone.
Hedidn’tbothertryingtopryherfingersapart.Shiftinghisbody,heliftedherintohisarmsandcametohisfeet,tryingnottonoticethatshewasscantilycladinasilk,pink,lacygarmentthatbarelycoveredherass.Hesuppressedagroanasheadjustedherweightagainsthim,thelaceabradinghischestasthesilkcaressedhisskin.Hestrodeoutoftheroom,makinghiswaydownthehallwayandintohisbedroom,withthemostpreciousthingintheworldtohimheldsafelyinhisarms.
Simonloweredherintohismassivebed,comingdownwithherbecauseshestillhadn’tloosenedherdeathgriparoundhisneck.HerpanicabatedslowlyandKararelaxedherarms,allowinghimtopullthecoversandaquiltontopthembeforeheslidinbehindher,spooningherbodyagainsthis,andwrappinghiswarm,musculararmsaroundherbodyprotectively.Karasighed,sinkingintohiswarmth,assherelaxedherheadbacktorestagainsthisshoulder,relishingthesecurityofhishuge,masculinebody.
“Okay?”hequestionedsoftly,hisbreathrufflingherhair.
“Yeah.I’msorryIwokeyou.I’llgobacktomyownbedinaminute.”Shedidn’twanttogoback.Shewantedtostayrightwhereshewas,warmandsafeinhisarms.Butsherespectedthefactthathelikedhisspacewhenheslept.
“You’renotgoinganywhere,”herumbledagainstherhair.
“Butyouwon’tsleep,”sheprotested,feelingsuddenlyselfishforwishingshecouldstay.
“Iwon’tgetafuckingminuteofsleepunlessyou’rehere.Ihaven’tsleptworthashitfortwoweeks.”Hisarmstightenedaroundherwaist.
Herbodyplasteredagainsthis,shecouldfeelahardprotrusionagainstherass.“You’renaked.”
“Yeah.Isleepintheraw,sweetheart.Getusedtoit,”hemurmured,hisvoicehusky.“Youwanttotellmeaboutthenightmare?”
Actually,whatshewantedwastoforget.Butsheturnedaroundinthecircleofhisarms,needingdesperatelytowrapherselfaroundhiswarmmasculinebody.Shewasn’tatiny,delicatefemale,butassheburiedherfaceagainsthisbulky,solidchest,shefeltlikeone.“Itwasjustadreamaboutwhathappened.Onlyinthedream,theygotmeintothecar.Theyweregoingtorapemebeforetheyshotmeinthehead.Ifought,buttheywererippingatmyclothes.Theyweresomuchstronger.AllIcouldthinkaboutwasthatIwantedtodiebeforetheycouldviolateme,buttheonewhogotawaywasontopofme,theotherholdingtheguntomyhead.”Sheshookherhead,tryingnottogetemotional.Itwasonlyadream.Ithadn’treallyhappened.“Butitwassoreal.Icouldsmelltheirbodyodor,seethoseevileyes.Iwokeupjustasthey…”Hervoicetrailedoffinashakenwhisper.
Simonrockedher,runningahandoverherbackasthoughhewerecomfortingasmallchild.“Shhh…it’sokay,sweetheart.You’resafe.Theycan’tgettoyouanymore.”
Herbodyquakingfromthenightmare,allshewantedwastowipeawaythebadmemories,toburyherselfinsensation,toindulgeherselfintheincrediblebodyofthemancomfortingher.Theonemanwhocouldmakeherforgetthelastfewdays,wipeitawaywithhissensualtouch.“Makelovetome.Makemeforget,”shewhispered,hervoiceseductiveandtremulous.
Shefelthisbodytenseasshepushedhimgently,rollinghimonhisback.Herhandsroamedoverhischest,savoringthehard,sinewymusclesandtaut,hotskin.Unhurried,shetracedeachmusclefromhisshoulderstohisabdomen,caressingtheenticingswirlofhairthatledfromhisnaveltohisgroin.
“Shit!Wecan’tdothis!”Simongroaned,catchingherwanderinghandsinhisstronggrip.“There’snobetterfeelingthanhavingyourhandsalloverme,butyoujustgotoutofthehospital.”
“Severaldaysago.AndI’mnothurt.Ifeelfine.Ihavealittlecutonmyforehead.There’sonlyoneplacewhereIreallyache.”Shepushedhisunresistinghandtotheheatbetweenherthighs,partingherlegs.Maybeshewascomingontoostrong,beggingtoomuch,butshedidn’tcare.SheneededSimon’spossession,neededhiminsideher.“Please.”Hervoicewaspleading,desperate.Pullingherhandfromhisgrasp,sheslidherhanddown,lower,wrappingitaroundhisengorgedcock.
“No!Christ!I’llcomeifyoutouchme.”Hisvoicewasstrangledashecapturedherhand,holdingitagainsthischest.Thehandbetweenherthighsbreachedtheelasticofhertinypanties,hisfingersslippingeasilybetweenhersaturatedfolds.“You’rewet.Sofuckinghot.”
“BecauseIneedyou.”Shemoanedashislarge,bluntfingersexploredher,movingsensuallyoverherclitandthetenderfleshsurroundingit.Mindlessdesiredevouredherbodywhole.Notthinking,onlyabletoreacttotherelentlessneedthatwaspoundingather,sheyankedthesoakedpantiesdownherlegs,kickingthemintothesheets,andclamberedontopofhim,straddlinghim.Placingahandoneachsideofhishead,shekissedhim.
Oneminuteshewasontopofhim,herlipscoveringhis,readytoloseherselfinthepowerofhistouch,andthenextmoment…shewasflatonherback.Hehadflippedher,tearinghismouthfromhers.
“No.Ican’t.Ifuckingcan’t.”Hisvoicewastortured,historsoimprisoningher,hishandsgrippingeachoneofherwristsatthesideofherhead
Hisbreathingwaslabored,ragged.Shecouldhearharshsoundscomingfromhisthroatasheattemptedtogetairinandoutofhislungs.
Shakingherhead,startingtoemergefromhereroticfog,shelookedupatthemassivefigureloomingover,amaninobvioustorment.
Shit.WhatdidIdo?DidIpushtoohard?
Themoonprovidedsomemutedlightintheroom,butitstillwasn’tenoughilluminationtoseehiseyes…butthen,shedidn’thaveto.Thesoundofhisvoice,hisbreathing,histremblingbody,histightholdonherwriststoldherthatshehadsenthimplummetingintohisownpersonalnightmare.
“Simon.It’sme.Kara.”Shepulledonherwrists,butshecouldn’tfreethem.“Talktome.”
“Iknowwhoyouare.Ijustcan’tfuckingdoit.”Chestheaving,hestayedlockedinplace.
“Kissme.”
Trappedunderhisbody,underhisdominance,shestillwasn’tsurethatshecouldassuagehisfear.Hewasn’thurtingher,butshewantedtobringhimbacktothehereandnow.Somehow,shehadinadvertentlyhurthim,senthimintoapanic.
Herheartwasracinganditseemedlikeforeveruntilhefinallyloweredhisheadslowly,fittinghismouthoverhers.Hekissedherlikeamanwhohadcomeunglued.Histonguespearedintohermouth,conquering,lashing,overandover.
Hiswild,dominantembracereleasedaprimalinstinctinsideher,asifherbodywasautomaticallyrespondingtohermate.Shemovedhertongueagainsthis,surrenderingherselftohim,lettinghimbehermaster.
“Kara.”Hebreathedhernameashereleasedhermouth,buryinghisheadinthesideofherneck.
“Yes.Justyouandme,Simon.Justus.”
“Needtofuckyou.”Thestatementwasmuffled,hisrumblingvoicevibratingagainstherneck.
“Doit.Justlikethis.”Somethingaboutherbeingontop,beingincontrolhadflippedhisdetonationswitch.Buthislustwasstillthere.Shecouldfeelit,rock-hardandhungry,pushingagainstherthigh.
“I’msorry,sweetheart.Itfeltsogood,butIjustcouldn’t-”
“No.Don’t.Itdoesn’tmatter.Ijustwantyouinsideme.”Shepartedherlegs,andpulledatherwrists.“Canyouletgoofme?”
Slowly,heloosenedhispowerfulgripashemovedbetweenherthighs.“Yeah.Ithinkso,”heansweredinatonefilledwithtrepidation.
Herheartstutteredasshepulledherwristsoutofhisnowonlyslightlyresistinghandsandwrappedherarmsaroundhisshoulders.“Ijustwanttoholdyou.Youhavecontrol.”
“Aroundyou,IdoubtI’lleverreallyhaveanycontrol,”hemutteredquietly,hisvoicefilledwithreluctantresignation.
“Makelovetome,Simon.”Hervoicewaspleading,butshedidn’tcare.Hismomentaryfearandvulnerabilityhadcrushedanyself-preservationinstinctsleftinherbody.Sheneededtohelpsethimfree,toobliteratewhateverwasinhispastthatheldhimprisoner.Hewastoogoodaman,tookindapersontoremaintrapped,unabletomoveforward.
NottomentionthefactthatIlovehimandwanthimsodesperatelythatit’spainful.
Itwaspasttimetostopbeingindenial,thinkingthatshecouldkeepSimonatanemotionaldistance.She’dbeenacoward,soafraidofdestroyingherselfthatshehadselfishlytriedtodenythetotallyamazingconnectionthatshehadwithhim.Anditwasatwo-wayconnection.Shewasn’ttheonlyonestrugglingwithit,uncertainhowtodealwithit.ForChrist’ssake…hehadfollowedheraround,protectedher,foroverayear.Hehadliterallypluckedheroffthestreets,givinghereverythingawomancouldeverdreamabout,andnotjustmaterially.Hecomfortedher,stayedbyhersidewhenshewassick.Helistenedtoherasthoughherconcerns,herthoughts,herdreams,wereimportanttohim.Obviously,hefeltsomething!Thequestionwas,coulditbethesamefascinating,beguiling,impossible-to-resistcouplingthatshefeltforhim?Inhercase,thatincrediblymysticalchemistryhadturnedintoagut-wrenchinglove,evolvingsofastthatithadhadtakenherbreathaway…alongwithhercommonsense.
“Touchme,sweetheart.Please.”Hisvoicewasraggedandedgy,fullofdesireandlonging,moreofadesperatecommandthanarequest.
Herhandsmovedslowly,strokinghiswide,strongshoulders,touchingeveryinchofsolidmuscle,savoringthestrengthradiatingfromhispowerfulbody.Shetraceduphisspine,herhandslandingonthenapeofhisneck.Pullinghisheaddown,herlipstracedhiscollarbonelightlyasshespearedherfingersintohishair.Shemoanedsoftlyashermouthmovedoverthepulseathisneck,themasculinescentofhimfloodingherbodywithcarnalheat.Shebreatheddeep,lettinghisfragranceconsumeher,hisgallopingpulsebeneathherlipslettingherknowthathewasasswampedineroticneedasshewas.
Hegroaned,hismassivebodystartingtomove,hishardmemberfindingawarmrestingplacebetweenherthighs.Hisvelvetycockslidalonghertenderfolds,saturatingitselfwithwetheat.
Everynerveinherbodycaughtfire,andsheopenedherlegswider,silentlybegginghimtosatiateher,tosatisfytheviolentneedthatwasclawingatherrelentlessly.
Suddenly,herearedup,makingherwhimperashedeprivedherofhisheat.Reachingforthehemofhershortnightie,hepulleditoverherhead,tossingitontothefloorbesidethebed.“Nothingbetweenus,”hegrowledasheloweredhimselfoverheragain.
Shehissedashisfiery-hotbodymethersfrombreasttogroin,savoringthesensationofbeingskin-to-skin.
“Mine.You’remine.Sayit.”Thedemandexplodedfromhimasthoughhecouldn’thelphimself.
DominantSimonhadreturnedwithavengeance,andKarashuddered.Hedidlovecontrol,andthathadnothingtodowithhispast.Thatwassimply,utterly,completely…Simon.
Hishandsnakedbetweentheirbodies,positioningtheblunt,silkyheadofhiscockagainsthertightopening,startingtoenterheroh-so-slowly.
“Sayit.”Histonegrewmoredemanding,morepossessive.
OhGod,howsherelishedhisdominance,hisstrength.“I’myours.Ineedyou.”
Herewardedherbyfillingherwithonesmoothstroke,buryinghiscockcompletelytotheroot.Thecarnalityoftheactionnearlymadeherclimax.
“Fuck!Youfeelsogood.”Hepulledoutslightlyandburiedhimselfagain,rollinghiships,makinghertakeeveryinchofhim.“I’mnotsureIknowhowtomakelove.Ionlyknowhowtofuck.”
Sheclutchedhisshoulders,tryingtofindherbalance,hersanity.“I’mnotsureIdoeither.Iguesswe’lllearntogether,”shetoldhimbreathlessly.
Shewrappedherlegsaroundhiswaist,needingtogetcloser.Alow,choked,reverberatingsoundcamefromhisthroatashepulledbackandsankintoheragain.Andagain.
Hisheadswoopeddown,capturingherdistressedwhimper,hismouthseeking,histongueconquering.Everytouchofhistongue,everythrustofhiscockwasabranding,aclaiming.Andshecoulddolittleelsebutsurrender.
Tearinghismouthfromherssotheycouldbothtakeamuch-neededbreath,hishipscontinuedtopistonintoher,asherasped,“Mine!”
Histeethnippedatherneck,makinghershudderwithprimaldesire.Hipslifting,meetingeveryfuriouspumpofhiships,Karamoanedasherfingerslefthishair,slidinglower,clenchingathisback.Hershortfingernailsdugintohisfleshashechangedangles,neverslowinghisheated,franticpace.
Justwhenshewasreadytoscreamwithfrustratedneed,hestartedtogrindhisgroinmercilesslyagainstherswitheverydeeppenetrationofhiscock,stimulatinghersensitiveclit.Ascreamrippedfromherthroatassheshattered.Heswalloweditwithhismouth,hisgroanvibratinginhermouthasherchannelpulsatedaroundhissilkencock.
Hepantedharshlyashismouthmovedtohershoulder.“Nothingbetterthanfeelingyoucomearoundme.”Heburiedhisshaftdeep,connectingtheirbodiestightly,fusingthemtogether.
Stillquiveringfromherexplosiveclimax,shefelthismusclestightenandhisbigbodytrembleashefloodedherwombwithscorchingheat.
Iloveyou.
Hereyesmoist,shetightenedherarmsaroundhim,neverwantingtoletgo.Emotionwelledupinsideher,ruthlesslyfightingtobefreed.Shechokeditbackwithanaudiblegasp,grapplingwiththeoverwhelmingneedtosaythosewordsaloud.
“Youokay?”hequestionedbreathlesslyandwithgruffconcern.
Herolledtoonesideandshemournedthelossassheloosenedherholdonhim,reluctantlyallowinghimtorestbesideher.“I’mfine.”Hehadobviouslythoughthewascrushingher.Likeshewasadelicateflower?Shewastallerthansomemen,eveninherbarefeet.Simonwastheonlyonewhocouldmakeheractuallyfeelpetite.
Shesighedashehoistedhereasilyintohisarms,pullingheragainsthissideashetuckedthecoversovertheirentangledbodies.Sheburrowedintohim,herheadonhisshoulderandonearmflungoverhismammothchest.Hismusculararmpulledhercloserwithafirmgrasparoundherwaist.
“Wemadelove,”hegrumbled,hisvoiceweary.
Smilingslightlyathisdisgruntledannouncement,shesimplyanswered,“Yes.”
Makinglovewasn’taboutthemechanics;itwasallaboutemotion,althoughshehadtoadmitthathewasprettydamnincrediblewiththemechanicalportionoftheact.Itdidn’tmatterhowtheytouchedorinwhatwaytheycametogether;itwastheemotionandtheintensityoftheexperiencethatgother.Thetruthwas,thesextonighthadbeennodifferentthananythingthathadhappenedbetweenthembefore.Ithadbeenjustasexplosive,justasemotional,andjustasearth-shattering.Themanrockedherentireworldeverysingletime.Anditwasneverindifferentordetached.Ithadbeenwild,passionate,intenselove-makingeverysingletime.Atleast,forherithadbeen.
Iwishhecouldtrustme.
Thedeep,steadycadenceofhisbreathingtoldherthatheslept.
Smallsteps.
Simondidn’tsleepwithanyone,didn’tallowhimselftobeinthesamebedwithanotherpersonwhenhewasvulnerable.Thefactthathewassleepingwithherplasteredagainsthimwasbiggerthanastep;itwasmorelikeahugestride.
Movingalittletogetcomfortable,herheartflippedoverwhenhegrumbledanincoherentprotestandyankedherbackagainsthim.
Yep.Theywouldneedtohaveatalkabouthistrustissuestomorrow.Sheneededtoknowsomethingaboutwhathappenedtohim,whyhehadreactedthewayhehadearlier.Itwasn’tpossibletocombataghostshecouldn’tsee,couldn’tunderstand.
NeveragaindidshewanttoseeSimoninthegripofpanic,lostinanunknownfear.Hisvulnerabilityhadnearlyrippedherheartout.
Afierceprotectiveinstinctflowedoverherashereyesflutteredclosed,completelyspentandexhausted.
He’lldodgeandbeevasive.Hewon’twanttotalkaboutit.
Ifhewasn’tready…well…she’dwaituntilhetrustedherenoughtodiscussit.
Satisfiedthatthingswouldworkoutfine,sheyawnedagainstSimon’sshoulderuntilherbreathingmatchedhis,deepandeven,andfellintoadreamless,contentedsleep.Threedayslater,Simonscrawledhissignatureonthelastofastackofmile-highdocumentsthathissecretaryhaddroppedonhisdeskearlierthatmorning.Slammingthegoldpenonthetopofthepilewithmoreforcethanwasnecessary,heleanedbackinhisenormousleatherchairwithafrustratedsigh,wonderinghowmanymoredayshecouldtakeofthetensionbetweenhimandKara.
Nosex.Notouching.Nowakingupinthemorningwithherdelectablebodywrappedaroundminelikeasilkenblanket.
God,thatmorningthreedaysagohadstartedoffasthebestmorningofhislife.
Unfortunately,whathappenedatbreakfastalsohaditrankingrightuptherewithoneoftheworst.
Shehadwantedtotalkaboutthenightbefore.
Hedidn’t.
Oh,hehadbeenmorethanwillingtotalkaboutandrepeatwhathadhappenedafterhisfreak-out.Theactualpanicattack?…notsomuch.
Rakinghishandthroughhishair,heleanedbackandtriedtorelaxhisbody,admittingtohimselfthatthedistancebetweenthetwoofthemwasn’treallyherfault.Much.Shehadtakenhisunwillingnesstodiscussitgracefully,givinghimoneofhersweetsmilesandtellinghimthatshewouldwaituntilhewasready.Butthen…justwhenhewasthinkingshemightendupwaitinguntilshewasoldandgraybeforehewantedtodiscussit…shedroppedthebomb
Ican’tmakelovewithyou,Simon.Notuntilyoutrustmeenoughtotellmewhathappened.Ijustcan’t.
Then,afterturninghisworldupsidedownwiththatcomment,shehadkissedhimontheforeheadlikehewasachild,wishedhimagoodday,andsashayedhersweetlittleassoutthedoor.Andshehaddoneitallwithasmile.What.The.Hell.
Tohercredit,shehadn’tbeenabitchtohim,hadn’traisedhervoiceorthrownatantrum.Shit,hewishedshewould.Maybehecouldgeneratealotmoreangerathertohelphimthroughhiscurrenttorment.
Theonlythingthatreallypissedhimoffwasthefactthathedidtrusther.Hejustdidn’twanttotalkaboutthat
“Youlooklikeamanwho’sreadytoattendhisownexecution.What’sthematter,littlebrother?GettingtiredofKara?’CauseifyouareIwouldgladly-”
“Touchherandyoudie.”Fistsclenchedonthedeskinfrontofhim,Simonleanedforward,thethreatoffratricideonhisface,ashewatchedhisbrothersaunteracrosshisoffice.“Don’tyoufuckingknock?”HeknewSamwasgoadinghimaboutKara,tryingtopushhisbuttons.Inreality,hisbrotherwouldnevercomenearheragain.SamhadmadethatperfectlycleartoSimonwhenhehadapologizedforhisbehaviorattheparty.However,itdidn’tstopSamfromtryingtoirritatethehelloutofhim.
SamshothimacockygrinashedroppedintoachairinfrontofSimon’sdesk.“WhywouldI?Iownthecompany.”
SimondecidedthattheonlythingworsethanowningHudsonwithSamwasthefactthattheybothhadanofficeonthesamefloor.“LasttimeIchecked,sodidI,”hesnappedbackatSam,notinthemoodforhisoldersibling’sbullshit.
“I’molder.Itgivesmeseniority.”SamproppedhisItalianleather-cladfeetcasuallyonSimon’sdesk.
Simonwaited,watchinghisbrotherrelaxbackintothechair.Thebastard.Leaningforward,Simonsweptonemusculararmacrossthedesk,knockingSam’sfeetintotheair.“Getyourdamnfeetoffmydesk!”
Really,wasthereanythingmoreamusingthanwatchingamaninanimmaculatedesignersuitflailinghisarmslikeababybird,tryingtocatchhisbalancebeforehischairflippedover?Simondidn’tthinkso.NotwhenitwasSamflutteringhisarmswhilehischairtilted.Theonlythingthatwouldhavemadeitbetterwasifhisbrotherhadtippedthechairoverandlandedflatonhisass.
Sam’sfeetfoundpurchaseonthefloor.HeglaredatSimonasheopenedthebuttonsonthejacketofhisperfectlytailoredsuitandleanedforward,restinghiselbowsonhisknees.“Wasthatreallynecessary?”
ItwasSimon’sturntogrin,hissmileevil.“Ithoughtso.”
“It’snotmyfaultthatyoumadethemistakeoffallinginloveandnowyou’remiserable.Shit,Ithoughtyou’dbehappynowthatshe’slivingatyourplaceagain.”Samsatbackandlacedhisfingersoverhisstomach,hisexpressiongrim.
Simon’sheadjerkedup.“WhosaidIloveher?”
Rollinghiseyes,Samreplied,“Youdidn’thavetosayadamnthing.IthinkIfigureditoutwhenIendeduppracticallyblindfromtheswellingwhenyoubeatthehelloutofmejustbecauseItouchedher.”
“Thatdoesn’tmeanIloveher,”Simongrunted.“Anditwasn’tbecauseyoutouchedher.Itwastheintent.”
“WhenwasthelasttimeyouthrashedmebecauseItouchedawoman?”
“Never.”
“Exactly.”
Simonsighed.“KaraandIhadaslightdisagreement.”Okay,forhim,itwasmorethanslight,buthedidn’tmentionthattohisbrother.
“About?”
“Shewantsmetotrusther.Tellherabouttheincidentthatleftmescarred.”Simon’svoicewashoarse.“ShethinksIstillhave”-hehesitatedbeforechokingout-“issues.”
Eyesnarrowing,Samasked,“Anddoyou?Stillhaveissues?”
“No!Hellno!ForChrist’ssake,ithappenedoversixteenyearsago,”Simonansweredquickly.Tooquicklyandtoodefensively.
“Timedoesn’tnecessarilymakeeverythinggoaway,Simon,”Samansweredthoughtfully.“Maybeyoushouldjusttellher.Maybeyouneedto.Isyoursilencereallyworthlosingher?Sheobviouslylovesyou,andwhetheryouwanttoadmititornot,youlovehertoo.Guessyoujustneedtodecideifshe’sworthit.”Samleanedforward,spearingSimonwithasharpglance.“Don’tfuckup.You’llregretitfortherestofyourlifeifyoudo.”
Pain?Regret?Sorrow?Forafleetingmoment,Simoncouldseeeveryoneofthoseemotionsreflectedinhisbrother’seyes.Bythetimehetookadeepbreathandopenedhismouthtoaskhiselderbrotheraboutit,Sam’sexpressionhadturnedindifferentandapathetic.Simonsnappedhisjawclosed,recognizingthelookonSam’sface,theunequivocalsignalthatmeanthissiblingdidn’twanttotalkaboutit.
“She’sbeingunreasonable,”Simongrumbled,returninghisattentiontohiscurrentproblem.Hewouldn’tpushSamtosharehispainifhisbrotherdidn’twantto.
“Admitit.Youloveher.”SamcrossedhisarmsandshotSimonaknowinglook.
“She’sstubborn.”
“Youloveher.”
“Itrusther.Itellhereverythingelse.”
“Youloveher.”
“Fuck!”Simonslammedhisfistdownonthedesksohardthatthesolidoakshookonitsfoundations.“Shemakesmecrazy.Shemakesmehappy.Ithinkshe’ssobeautifulthatIwanttojustsitandlookatherforhours.Oneminute,I’mperfectlysane,andthenext,I’mtotallylosingit.Shecouldn’tgiveashitlessaboutthefactthatI’mrich,andIthinkthewomanisblindbecauseIswearshedoesn’tevennoticethatI’mscarred.ThewayshelooksatmesometimesmakesmefeellikeI’mtenfeettall.Andshe’slookingatme.Notthebillionaire,notthewealthyexecutive.Justtheman.Shecanbeasstubbornasadamnmule,butIevenlikethatbecauseshe’sdetermined.Smart.Kind.Andsheputsupwithmycrankyass,acceptsmeexactlyasIam.”Breathlessfromhistirade,Simonsuckedinatrembling,unevengulpofair.Heslumpedforward,hisangerspent.“So,yeah.Ifthesewild,lunatic,possessivefeelingsforherthatIhaveeveryfuckingminuteofeverydayarelove…I’mscrewed.Ican’tevenimaginehavingtolivemylifewithouther.”Voicevibratingwithemotion,helookedupathisolderbrother,hisexpressiontortured.
“Thendon’t,”Samansweredsimply,hisbrowlifting,meetingSimon’squestioningglance.“Webuiltthiscompanytogether.Westartedinacrappy,one-bedroomapartment,bro.Nowwe’rewealthybeyondourwildestdreamsandamajorplayerworldwide.Ifyoucanaccomplishthat,youcanhandlethis.”Sam’svoicewentfromserioustoteasingasheadded,“Pullyourheadoutofyourassandsolvetheproblem.”
Simon’slipscurvedupinasmallsmile.Hehadn’theardSamsaythosewordsinyears.IthadbeenafrequentstatementbackinthedayswhentheywerestillbuildingHudson.Ifoneofthemgotstalledinthebusinessbyaroadblock,theotherwoulddeliveraswiftkicktotherearwiththoseexactwords.Ithadbecometheirmantra,buttheyhadn’tneededitinaverylongtime.TheyhadplentyofemployeeswhowerepaidverywelltosolvethoseproblemsbeforetheyevergottoSamorhim.“SometimesIthinkthatI’dratherrebuildawholebusinessthantohavetodealwiththis.”
Samshrugged.“Businessisbusiness.It’snotalwayseasy,buttheoutcomeisfairlypredictable.Relationshipsaremessy.Youhavenodata,nostatistics.Nothingtojustifytakingtheleap,exceptforemotion.”Samshuddered,asthoughthethoughtofjumpingintoaseriousrelationshipwasakintotorture.
“Thenwhyinthehellareyoutellingmetodoit?”Simonpiercedhisbrotherwithanirritatedglare.
“Youneedher.”Samstoodabruptlyandbuttonedhissuitjacket.“Butifyoueverdecideyoudon’twanther-”
“Don’tstart!”Simonrumbled,hisvoicelackingvenom.Ifhehadrealizedanythingtoday,itwasthefactthathisbrotherhadhisownsecrets,awomaninhispast-verylikelyMaddie,judgingbySam’sstrangereactiontothecurvyredhead-whostillhauntedhim.Hesuspectedthatwhoevershewas,shewasthereasonthatSamwentthroughwomensofast,sounemotionally.Samwastryingtofillavoid,tryingtoforget.Simonshookhishead,knowingthathiselderbrotherwassmartenoughtofigureouteventuallythatitjustwouldn’twork.Ifawomangotunderyourskin,shestayedthere.Simon’swholeworldrevolvedaroundKaranow,andnootherwomancouldeverbeasubstitute,couldeverfilltheblack,hugevacuumshewouldleaveinsidehimifsheeverwalkedaway.
Sam’scharmingsmilewasback.“Youloveme.Youknowyoudo.”
“Notrightnow,”Simonansweredautomatically.
Samswaggeredtothedoor,notahairoutofplace,hissuitandtieundisturbed.Noonewouldeverknowthathehadjustwatchedhisyoungerbrotherpracticallyhaveanervousbreakdownbeforehiseyes.
SamplacedhishandonSimon’sdoor.Beforehecouldexit,Simoncalledafterhiminahuskyvoice.“Sam?”
Samturnedbackwithaquizzicalexpression.“Yeah?”
“Thanksforlistening.”
Thelookthatpassedbetweenthemspokevolumes.Simonwantedtotellhisbrotherhowmuchhecared,butalumpformedinhisthroat.Theysparredlikebrothersoftendid,butSamhadsacrificedalotforSimonandhismother.Workedhisassintothegroundforalltheseyears.
“Nobodydeserveshappinessmorethanyou,littlebrother.It’swithinyourgrasp.Takeit,”Samanswered,hisvoicefullofbrotherlysupport,asheexitedwithoutanotherword.
Blowingoutashakybreath,Simonstoodandgrabbedhisbriefcase,lookingaroundtheplush,executiveoffice.Otherthanhisdeskandchair,everythingwasdecoratedinartdeco,adesignthathereallydidn’tlike.Howinthehellhadthathappened?
Theofficehadbeendoneyearsago,buthe’dneverreallynoticed,neverreallycared.
Maybebecauseyoutoldthedecoratortodowhatevershewanted.
Yeah,that’sexactlywhathehaddoneyearsago.Hecouldn’thavecaredlesswhatdecortheinteriordesignerchose.Hecametowork,tookcareofbusiness,andretreatedbacktohiscondosohecouldimmediatelyburyhimselfinhislabathome.Maybehegruntedagreetingtohissecretaryandpersonalassistantwhenhearrivedanddepartedfromthehigh-risebuildingeveryweekdaymorning.Ormaybenot.Hewasusuallysohyper-focusedonwork,soenclosedinthatbubble,thathedidn’tevenremember.
Hejerkedattheknotinhisexpensiveburgundytietoloosenitandundidthetopbuttonofhisshirt.Christ,howhehatedwearingasuit.
Carefulwiththetie.It’soneofKara’sfavorites.
Actually,thatmightnotbetrue.Hewasn’texactlycertainthatshehadafavorite.Shetoldhimeverymorninghowhandsomehelookedwhenhearrivedinthekitchen,dressedforworkinabusinesssuitandtie.Buttheveryfirsttimeshehadtoldhimthat,hehadbeenwearingthistie.Sincethatday,hefoundhimselfreachingforthisparticulartieprettydamnoftenonhisworkdays.
Hesnortedsoftlyashewalkedtowardthedoorofhisoffice,hisstridenearlysilentontheplushcarpet.Christ,hewasgoingoffthedeepend.
Whenhadhestartedcaringwhichtiehewore,howhisofficewasdecorated,whetherornothewascordialtohisemployeeseveryday?
Itwasdefinitelytimetogohome.
Home.Karamakesmethinkofthecondoashome.Herlaughter.Hervoice.Hersmell.Herverypresencemakesithome,andnotjustaplacewhereIgowhenI’mdoneintheoffice.
Heexitedtheoffice,lettingthedoorclosesoftlybehindhim.HeglancedatNina’sdesk,haltingabruptlyinfrontofit.
“Youneedsomething,boss?”Hertonewasprofessional,butshehadagenuinesmileonherface.
Helookedoverthetopofanabundantbouquetofrosesthatwasplacedprominentlyonherdesk,frowningathisgray-hairedassistant.Hadheforgottenherbirthday?No.No,hehadn’t.Nina’sbirthdaywasinSeptember.Andhissecretary,Marcie,alwaysremindedhim.“Niceflowers.What’stheoccasion?”heaskedcuriously.
Ninagavehimapuzzledlook,peeringathimoverherreadingglasses.“Boss,it’sFebruaryfourteenth.Valentine’sDay.Youknow…hearts,flowers,romance.”Thelittlewoman’ssmilebroadened.“MyRalphhassentmetwodozenredroseseveryValentine’sDayforthirty-sevenyears.”Shesighed.“He’sstillsoromantic.”Hervoicevibratedwithaffectionandadoration.
Valentine’sDay?Yeah,heknewtheholiday;hehadjustneverpaidanyattentionwhenitcameandwenteveryyear.Itwasjustanotherday,atwenty-four-hourperiodoftimewhenhesawalotofCupidsandredhearts-whenhechosetonoticethem,whichwasn’tveryoften.
Heshotaquickglanceathisblondesecretary,herdesksituatednexttoNina’s.“Whereareyourflowers?”
Marciepaused,turningherheadtowardhimandawayfromthecomputeronwhichshehadbeenclickingawayondiligentlybeforehisquestion.“Haven’tgottenthemyet.Myhubbywillgivethemtomebeforewegoouttodinner.Healwaysdoes.”
“Uh…isthisnormal?Dinner?Flowers?”HelookedbackatNinawithascowl.Shit,hehadn’tplannedanythingforKara.Shedeservedromance,hearts,flowers,andwhateverelseamandidforawomanonadayforlovers.
“Itdepends.Mostcouplesmaketheirowntraditions,”hisassistantanswered,hereyesquestioning.“Areyouokay?”
Damnit.Hedidn’tknowwhattodoandhehatedthatfeeling.Whatelsewastraditional?Whatelsewouldmakeawomanhappy,feelcherished?HadKaragottenflowersfromherex?Hadhetakenheroutfordinner?
Settinghisbriefcaseonthefloor,hetriedtosquashthejealousyandpossessivenessthatwererisingupinsidehim.Itdidn’tfuckingmatterwhatsomemanhaddoneforherinthepast…Simonwasdeterminedtodobetter.Shewashiswomannow.Histoprotect.Histocherish.HewantedtomakeherValentine’sDaysomemorablethatallshecouldthinkofwashimfromthisdayforward.Excepthehadnoideahowtoaccomplishhisgoal.
HeleanedoverNina’sflowersandtoldherinahesitant,lowvoice,“Kara.”
Ninagrinned.“She’sagem,boss.Awonderfulyoungwoman.”
Onlyonewomancouldmakehimsaythreewordsthatheneverthoughtwouldcomeoutofhismouth.“Ineedhelp.”Really,whenitcametoKara,thewordsweren’tallthatdifficult.“I’mnotsurewhattodo.Canyouhelpme,Nina?”
Hisassistantsprangoutofherchairwithanenthusiasmandspeedthatreallyshouldn’tbenormalforawomanofherage,motioningvigorouslytoMarcietojoinher.Thetwoofthemsurroundedhim,pepperinghimwithquestions.
Heshouldhavebeenembarrassed,butstrangelyenough,hewasnot.SimonHudson,billionaireandco-ownerofoneofthemostpowerfulcorporationsintheworld,inahuddlewithtwofemaleemployees,listeningraptlytoeverywordthewomenspoke,toeverybitofadvicetheygave.
Sampassedbythem,smirkingashemadehiswaytotheelevator,obviouslyabletopickuppartoftheconversationeventhoughtheywerespeakinginlow,conspiringvoices.
Simonshothisbrotheraone-finger-salutewhenhesawSam’smockingexpression,barelytakinghiseyesawayfromthetwowomeninfrontofhimwhoseemedtoknowtheanswerstoallofthemysteriesofwomen.Rightnow,tohim,theyweregoddesses.
HecompletelyignoredthesnickerheheardfromSamashisbrotherwalkedaway.Thebastard.Hecouldn’twaituntilthedaythathiselderbrotherneededadvice.
TurninghisattentionbacktoNinaandMarcie,helistenedandlearned.Karaletoutanaudible,heartfeltsighasshesankdeeperintoSimon’sgardenbathtub,thehotwaterandbubblescoveringnearlyherentirebody,leavingonlyherheadbobbingabovethewater.Hehadofferedhertheuseofhistubinthemasterbathanytimeshewantedit,butshehadnevertakenhimupontheoffer.Shehadaperfectlywonderfultubandshowerattachedtoherownroom,butitwasn’tnearlyaselaborateasthisone.
Admitit.Itisn’tthesizeofthetub.It’sthefactthatit’shisthatmadeyoucomeinhere.
Frowning,shegrabbedalargeloofahspongefromtheledgeofthetubandstartingscrubbingherarmswithenoughforcetomakeherskinburn.Damnit.Shedidn’twanttoadmitthatshemissedSimonsodesperatelythatshewantedtousethetubheused,breatheinhisscentthatlingeredinhisbathroom.
Refusingtohavesexwithhimwasyourbrilliantidea.
Yeah,itwas.Butshewasseriouslyre-thinkingthatdecision.Ithadfeltliketherightthingtodoatthetime.Shewantedtobewithhim,secureintheknowledgethathetrustedhercompletely.Notknowingwhathadhappenedtohimcouldcausehertomakeothermistakes,tohurthiminadvertently.Shecouldn’tstandthatthought.She’dhopedhemightopenupandsharehistraumawithher,letherhelphimthroughit.
Butshehadbeendeadwrong.
Hehaddistancedhimself,pulledawayratherthansharehisinternaltorment.Hehadn’ttouchedher,hadn’tkissedher,sinceshehadtoldhimthatshecouldn’tmakelovewithhimunlesshetoldherabouttheincident.Whatinthehellhadhappenedtohim?Hadshepushedhimtoofar,toofast?Wouldithavebeenbettertosettleforonlywhathewasabletogive?
Icouldlethimtiemetothebedandfuckmesenseless.Thatway,Ican’thurthimunintentionally.
Shegroanedasshestoppedscrubbingherarmsrawandliftedalegfromthewater,restingitonaseatattheedgeofthetub.God,thethoughtwastempting.Shemightbeanindependentwoman,butshehadlovedhissexualdominance,histake-chargeassaultonhersenses.Insomestrangeway,itarousedherbeyondendurance,andheexercisedthatalphasideofhimeverysingletimehetouchedher.Mixedwithhisaddedtendernessandvulnerabilitythatpeekedthroughonoccasion,itwasanimpossible-to-forgetlurethatsuckedhertowardhimlikeamothtoaflame.
Simonmadeherfeelbeautiful.
Hemadeherfeelsafe.
God…shelovedherprimitive,protective,possessivemalewhohadaheartofgold.
Liftingherleg,sheranthespongeoverhercalf,slowlytowardherkneeandgentlyacrossherthigh.Imagesflashedthroughhermind,makingthesensitivefleshbetweenherlegspulsatewithneedandcausingherhearttomissabeat.
BeingboundtoSimon’sbed,athismercy,hismouthdevouringher.
Onthecouch,herwristsrestrainedwhileherockedherworld.
Intheelevator,openingtohim,himpummelingheruntilshescreamed.
Threenightsago,holdinghimashemadehercomeapart.
Ohhell,hewashereveryeroticfantasycometolifeinstunning,gloriouscolorandtherewasn’tathingshedidn’tloveabouthim.
Alonetearstreakeddownhercheekassheswitchedlegsandworkedontheotheronewiththesponge.
Threedays.Ithadonlybeenthreedaysandshewasalreadyamess.Thelonelyyearningforhimwasalreadypulverizingher,swallowingherwhole.Notonlywashehereroticfantasy,hewashercompletefantasy.Thewholedamnpackage.Shehadnevermetamanlikehim,andprobablyneverwouldagain.
Hewassweet,althoughhewoulddenyit.
Hewastender,althoughhewoulddenythat,too.
Kind.
Compassionate.
Afreakinggenius,amanshelearnedsomethingfromeverysingleday,althoughshedefinitelyknewhewouldblowthatoff,too.
Becausehewasalsohumble,SimonHudsondidn’teverseehimselfassomeonespecial.Butshesawhimashewas:amantograbholdofandneverletgo.
Asecondtearfloweddownherothercheekasherheartcrumbled.
Shedidn’twanttogobacktoherlifebeforeSimon.Andnotbecauseshecaredaboutbeingpoor.Shehadalwayslivedinpovertyandhadneverplannedtobeanythingotherthancomfortable.Secure.Moneydidn’tbuyhappiness,andhavingmaterialthingscouldn’tevencomeclosetocompetingwithhavinglove,havingthatonespecialpersonwhocouldmakehercomplete,whole.Whatgoodwerethingsandmoneyifapersonwasn’temotionallyfulfilled,happywiththeiraccomplishments,nomatterhowbigorhowsmall?
I’dfeelexactlythesamewayaboutSimonevenifhewasn’twealthy.Aslongashewashappy.
Granted,Simonwastoointelligent,tooambitiousnottobesuccessful.Butthereweretimeswhenshewishedhewasn’tquitesowealthy,didn’tworksohard.Buthisintelligence,hisdrivetomakehisproductstheverybest,werepartsofhimthatsheloved.Sheacceptedthewholepackage,freakingadoredthesexy,masculine,quirkybundleoftestosteronethatmadehimuniquely…Simon.
Takingaseatonahighledgeofthetub,sheclosedhereyesassherantheloofahupherstomachslowly,lettingherimagesofSimontakecontrolofhermind,theelusivesmellofhimonthescrubbingspongeassailingeveryoneofhersenses.
Karabitherlipastheslightlyabrasiveloofahslidoverherbreasts,teasingherswollen,hardnipples.SheimaginedSimonbitingthemgently,swirlinghistongueoverthetips,hereroticthoughtsandarousalmakingherletherselfgo.Givingintothepoundingdemandsofherbody,sheopenedherthighsandallowedherotherhandtoslideupherslipperythighandbeginadecadentindulgence,afantasy.
Ifshecouldn’tbewithSimoninreality,atleastshewouldbewithhiminhermind.
Karahasnoreasontostay.
Simon’sgutclenchedasheknockedonthedoorofKara’sroom,waitingforhertoanswer.Hoffmanhadcalledhimlessthananhourago,informinghimthatthepolicehadapprehendedthesecondoffender,theotherbastardwhohadtriedtoabductKara.
Cursingunderhisbreath,hepushedthedooropen,findingherbedroomempty.Hebreathedasighofreliefashesawhercellphoneandherbackpacksittingonherbed.Shewashome,stillsomewhereinthecondo.She’dneverleavewithoutherpack.
Doessheknow?HadDetectiveHarriscalledher?Knowingverywellthatheshouldn’t,hepickedupherphone,thumbingthroughhermissedcalls.Therewasonlyonethatwasrecent.Ithadoccurredthirtyminutesearlier,anditwasfromHarris.Therewasavoicemail,buthedrewthelineatlisteningtohermessages.Healreadyknewwhatthemessagewasabout.Shewassafe;themenwhohadattackedherwerebothlockedup.
Thereasonforherbeinghereinhishomewithhim…gone.
Hehadtotellher.Hemightbeaselfishbastard,buthewouldn’tletKaraspendanotherminutefearingthatsomeonewasontheloose,tryingtokillher.
Asfarasheknew,shehadn’tsufferedanothernightmare.Godknewthathelistenedcloselyeverynight,lefthisbedroomdooropenincasesheneededhim.Shehadn’t.
Droppingherphonebackonthebed,heyankedathistie,undoingtheknotcompletely,leavingthematerialtodrapearoundhisneck.Hehaddiscardedhisjacketinthekitchenafewminutesearlierwhenhehadarrivedhome.Uncertaintysettledoverhimlikeadarkcloudasheexitedherbedroom.Wouldshestayeventhoughtheimmediatethreattoherwasgone?Andifshewantedtoleave,howinthehellcouldheeverlethergo?
Nothappening.She’smine,damnit!
Grittinghisteeth,hisemotionsbouncingbetweendeterminationandfear,hewentinsearchofher.Mostlikely,shewasinthecomputerlab.Hislipscurvedupward,wonderingifshewouldbadgerhimforcluesinherpursuitofmasteringMythWorldII.Sheplayedhisgameexclusively,declaringthattheothergamesweren’taschallenging,alternatelypraisinghimforbeingageniusandnagginghimfortips.Heknewshedidn’treallywanthimtotellher,tospoilthechallengeofthegame.Hell,ifshehadreallywantedtoknow,ifshehadjustonceturnedthosebabyblueeyesinhisdirection
Hecheckedthelab,butshewasn’tthere.Shehadtobeinthegym.Hesitatingasheheadedinthatdirection,hestartedtounbuttonhisshirt,headingtowardhisbedroom.Hewantedtogetoutofthisirritating,stiffshirtandpants,throwonsomeworkoutclothesandpumpironuntilhisbodyrelaxed.HowinthehellhecouldrelaxwhenhesawKarainherskimpyexerciseclothinghedidn’tknow,buthewantedtobewithher,achedtoseeher.
Hewouldn’tblameherifsheturnedonherheelandlefttheminutehewalkedintotheroom,buthehopedshedidn’t.Honestly,hewoulddeserveit.Thelastthreedayshadbeentense,andhehadbeenacompletebastardtoher,answeringhercheerfulquestionswithone-word,terseanswers,practicallyignoringherpresencewhenshewasintheroomwithhim.Slowly,shehadbecomeaswithdrawnashewas,speakingonlywhentheyhadtocommunicate.Stillfriendly,butdistant.
Ashemadehiswaydownthehalltohisroom,hepromisedhimselfthathewouldresolvethatissue.Hecouldn’ttakeitanymore.Samwasright-foronce!HeneededKara,andfeelinghermovefurtherandfurtherawayfromhimwaslikecuttingoffalimb.Fuck!Itwasmorelikecuttingouthisheartwithadullknife.
Rippingthetiefromhisneck,hedroppeditonhisbedandfinishedunbuttoninghisshirt.Hehadjustpickedbothofthemuptoputinhishamperwhenheheardher.
Heartpounding,hisheadtiltedtolisten.Hepickedupawhimper,afemininemoan,andthen…hisname.
“Simon.”
Thechoked,urgentlonginginherhusky,seductivevoicesentshiversdownhisspine.Thegarmentsinhishanddroppedtothefloorunnoticed.Hemovedtowardtheneedysounds,stoppingatthedoortothemasterbath.Hecouldnomoreturnawayfromthatdoorthanhecouldstopbreathing.Thedoorwasclosed,butitwasn’tlatched.Inadaze,hepushedthedooropenslowly,lightsteamgreetinghimashesilentlytookastepforwardandpushedthedoorwideopen.
HolyChrist!
Hisheartpaused,hisbreathinghalted,ashishungryeyeslandedonKara.Shewasspreadoutonahighledgeinthetub,abovethemassofbubbles,waterlickingherankles,caressingherthighs,lostineroticecstasy.Herthighswerespreadwide,exposingthemouth-watering,glisteningfleshbetweenherthighs.Headthrownback,eyesclosed,shewasn’tawareofhimwatchingher,hissensesmesmerizedbythehandbetweenherlegs.Herlusciousbreastsbouncedasherhipsroseupanddowninthewater,meetingthefuriouslymovingfingersthatwereteasingherclit.
Hestruggledforair,hiscockhardenoughtosplitdiamonds.Bitingbackagroan,heknewheshouldleavehertoherprivacy,buthecouldn’t.Itwasn’tpossible.Nothinglessthanthewholeworldendinginacataclysmiccatastrophewasrippinghimawayfromoneofthemosterotic,beautifulthingshehadeverseen.
“Simon.”
Shewasfantasizingabouthim.Imagininghim.Hewanteddesperatelytoknowwhathewasdoingtoherinherimagination.Probablyexactlywhathewantedtobedoingrightnow.Hewantedtoburyhisheadbetweenthosesilkenthighs,fuckhertightchannelwithhisfingersashepleasuredherclitwithhismouthandtongue
Hestrippedoffhispantsandbriefs,hiseyesneverleavingherwrithingbodyashedroppedthemsilentlytothefloor,steppingawayfromthem.Partofhimwantedtoapproachher,worshipthatbegging,swollenpinkfleshbetweenherthighs,givesomeattentiontothosehard,pebblednipples.Buthecouldn’tmove.Hewassweptupintoherarousal,asightsocarnalthatithadhimpalminghisengorgedcock,steppingclosertothetub.
Alow,throatygroanthathecouldn’tholdbackstartledher.Herheadjerkedup,hereyesfulloflustandsultryneed.
“Don’tstop.Please.Ineedtowatchyoucome.”Hisvoicewasgraveled,raspywithdesireandlonging.
Herhandquitmoving,butsheleftitonherpussy.“I’msorry,Simon.I-”
“Makeyourselfcome,Kara.Keepgoing.Thinkaboutme.There’snothingmorethatIwantinthisworldthantowatchyoupleasureyourself.It’sbeautiful.”Shedidn’tknowhowbeautifulshelooked-skinflushed,wanton,abandoned.
Hereyesroamedhisbody,hesitating,narrowinginonthecockthatheheldtightlyinhisgrasp.“No.You’rebeautiful,Simon.ThemostbeautifulmanI’veeverseen.”
Hedidn’tthinkitwaspossibletogetmorearoused.Butherlow,come-fuck-mevoicenearlysenthimovertheedge,thefactthatshewantedhimalmosthisundoing.
Theireyeslocked,aninvisiblethreadkeepingthemfocusedoneachother.Hegroanedasherhandmoved,hereyesgrowingsteamierashestartingpumpinghiscock.
Theywatchedeachotherwithnaked,unbridledpassion.Shebecamewild,uninhibitedasshelickedherlips,watchinghimjerkonhisready-to-explodecock.
Rivuletsofsweatpoureddownhisfaceasshewhisperedhisnamebetweenjerkypantsanderoticmoansastheystayedconnected,completelylostinawebofdesiresofiercethathecouldbarelyremainstanding.
“That’sright,baby.Bringyourselfoff,”hedemandedashefistedhimselfharder,thepurepleasureoffeastinghiseyesonherunrestrainedlustmakinghisballstighten,thepressureinsidehimbuilding.
Tendrilsofdarksilkyhairhadescapedtheclipholdinghermanebackandtheyframedherface,brushedoverhershoulders.Hewasintoxicated,bewitched,enthralledwiththefeastforhiseyesspreadoutinfrontofhim.
Movingherfingersfromherclit,Karapushedtwofingersintohertightchannel,fillingherself,movingtheminandoutwithstrong,deepstrokes.Shegaspedeverytimeherfingersslammedintoheropening,increasinglydeep,faster.Simonincreasedhispace,keepingtimewithher.
“Makeyourselfcomeforme,”hedemanded,knowinghecouldn’tkeepthisupmuchlonger,howevermuchhe’dliketowatchherlikethisforever.
Herfingersmovedbacktoherclit,glidingeasilyalongtheswollennub.Panting,shethrewherheadbackwithalong,throatymoan.
Sheclimaxedhard,moaninghisname,herbackarching,herwholebodyquivering.
Notabletoholdbackanothersecond,Simonexploded,puttinghishandinfrontofhiscocktocapturethestreamofhotfluidthatprobablywouldhavehitthedamnwallhadhenotstoppedit.
Sheleanedback,herbreathingheavyanduneven,hereyesglassy.Afterquicklywashinghishands,hecrossedthespacebetweenthem,andsteppedintothetub.
Hepulledherunresistingbodyintothewaterwithhim,hismouthcoveringhersinatender,languorouskiss.
Herfacewasflushedasshepulledback,hereyesdartingawayfromhis.“Ican’tbelieveIjustdidthat.”
“Don’t,Kara.”Hisfingersgrippedherchin,gentlytiltingherface,makinghermeethiseyes.“Don’teverbeembarrassedwithme.You’rebeautiful.ThesexiestwomanI’veeverseen.Watchingyoucomewassofuckinghotthatitdamnneargavemeheartfailure.There’snoshameinsomethingthatincredible.”
Wishinghecouldexpresshisdesiretoshareallthingsintimatewithher,hisobsessiontobeclosetoher,hetuggedherbackontoabuilt-inloungeseat.Aftersittingandleaningback,waterlappingathistorso,hepulledherbetweenhislegs.Moldinghernakedbodytohis,herbacktohisfront,hewrappedhisarmstightlyaroundherwaisttoanchorher.Henearlysighedinecstasyassherelaxedagainsthim,herheadrestingagainsthisshoulder.Heburiedhisfaceinherhair,breathinginhertantalizingsmellforthefirsttimeinthreedays,feelinglikehewasfinallywherehebelonged.
“I’vejustneverdonethatwhensomeonewaswatching.ItoldyouIdon’thavemuchexperience.”Shesighed.“Imissedyou.IknowIpushedyouaway.Ishouldn’thave.Ijustwantedyoutosharewhathappenedwithme,tohelpmeunderstandwhathappenedtheothernight.I’mreallysorry,Simon.I-”
“Shhh…stop!”Hismouthtoherear,hewhispered,“Itisn’tyou,Kara.”Hell,itmadehischesthurttohearherapologizingwhenheshouldbebegginghertoforgivehim.He’dtreatedherpoorly.Shutherout.Hejustwasn’tusedtoawomanwhoactuallywantedtobeclosetohim,awomanwhoactuallygaveashitenoughtotry.“It’smyproblem.SomethingthatI’venevertoldanyone.Shit!InevereventoldtheshrinkthatMommademeseeafterthewholethinghappened.Notthewholetruth,anyway.”
“Helenhadyouseeacounselor?”shequestionedinalow,thoughtfulvoice.Herhandscoveringhisarmsthatwerewrappedaroundherwaist,shesqueezedgentlyinacomfortinggesture.
Heshivered,eventhoughthewaterlappingovertheirskinwasstillhot.Takinginadeepbreath,heexhaledslowly,knowingthatatthispoint…hewasallin.Itwastimetoriskitall,throwallhiscardsonthetableandpraythathecameoutthewinner,thatshecaredenoughtostaywithhim.Truthwas,hedidtrustKara.But,didhewanttotalkabouthisshameandirrationalfears?Oh,hellno…heabsolutelyfuckingdidn’twanttotalkaboutit.Buthisobsessionwastobeclosetothewomanhewasholdinginhisarms,thewomanwhowasleaningbackagainsthimwithcompletefaithandtrust,withagentlenessandpatiencethathadhiminaweofher.
Nothingbetweenus.Ever.
“Yeah,shedid.IsawDr.Evansforoverayear.”Hisvoicewashoarseandhesitantashisinstinctswarredwithhisemotions.“MomwantedtomakesureIwasokayemotionally.”
Shesquirmedbackagainsthim,pushingherbodytightlyagainsthis,gettingascloseasshepossiblycould.Herhandssliddownhisarms,findinghishandunderthewater,entwiningtheirfingerstogether.
Hebreathedinthescentofherasshetiltedherhead,restingitagainsthisjaw,herfragrancesurroundinghim.
“Simon?”shewhisperedsoftly.
“Yeah?”Hegaveherfingersagentlesqueeze.
“Iloveyou.”Hervoicewasbarelyaudible.“Iloveeverythingthatyouare,everypartofyou.Nothingthathappenedinyourdistantpastisgoingtochangethat.Ievenloveyouwhenyou’rebossy.”
“I’mneverbossy,”heansweredautomatically,thewallsaroundhisheartcrumbling,allowinghishearttosoar.Holyshit!Hehadwantedhertosayit,buthehadneverimaginedthatitwouldfeelthisdamnamazingtohearit.Hewasn’tsurewhathehadeverdonetodeserveawomanlikeher,buthewasn’tstupid.Hewaskeepingher.“YouknowthatI’llneverletyougonow,don’tyou?”Itwasn’treallyaquestion,buthefiguredthatsheshouldknowhisintentions.
“Ididn’ttellyousothatyouwouldfeelobligated.Ijustwantedyoutoknow.”Inalightertone,sheadded,“Andyouarebossy.NowtellmeaboutDr.Evans.”
Obligated?Shewasn’tanobligation.Shewashiswholedamnlife.Hisarmstightenedaroundherconvulsively.
Shelovesme!
Herelaxed,thetensiondrainingfromhisbody.Suddenly,talkingaboutthepastdidn’tseemquitesodifficult.Yeah,he’dmuchrathertakehiswomantobedandshowherexactlyhowmuchheworshippedher,buthewantedtodoitwithfulldisclosure.Heneededtoexplainwhathadhappenedtheothernight,andtheonlywaytodoitwastotalkaboutthepast.
Shelovesme.
Hestartedtotalk.“BeforeItellyouaboutDr.Evans,IguessIshouldstartatthebeginning.”
Karanodded,notwantingtointerrupttheflowofhiswordswithanyquestionsorcomments.Shehadn’tmeanttoconfessherlove,butshehadn’tbeenabletohelpherself,hadn’tbeenabletoholdbackthewords.Andshedidn’tregretit.Shewaswearyfromtryingtohideit,andnomandeservedtobelovedmorethanSimon.
“Myfatherdiedamonthbeforetheincident.Overdose.Drugsandalcohol.HewasfoolishenoughtostealdrugsfromoneofthebiggestdrugdealersontheWestCoast,aguyheranerrandsforordistributeddrugsforinreturnforenoughdrugsandboozetofeedhisownhabit.Herarelygotpaidincash,andevenifhedid,hedidn’tuseittofeedhisfamilyorhiswife.”Hisvoicewaslow,seethingwithdisdainforthemanwhohadfatheredhim.“Momtriedherbest,butshehaddroppedoutofhighschoolandcouldn’tgetanythingbutminimum-wagejobs.Shedidwhatevershecouldtofeedusandkeepdearolddad’sbusinessawayfromourshittyapartmentandawayfrommeandSam.Mostly,shekeptusoutoftrouble,makingusseethatwecouldbesomethingmore,somethingbetter.”Hisvoicecracked,hisadorationforhismotherevident.
EverythingthatHelenhadtoldhermadesensenow.Helenblamedherselffornotbeingabletogiveherboysabetterchildhood.KarafrownedassherememberedthesorrowinHelen’seyeswhenshehadtalkedaboutherboys,theircrappychildhood.Didn’tHelenrealizethatshehadgivenherboyssomethingtoclingtointheirchildhood,somethingtheydesperatelyneededtosurviveintact?HelenhadgivenSimonandSamlove…andhope.
Simon’svoicestrengthenedashecontinued.“Rosewasmychildhoodfriend,reallymyonlyfriendotherthanSam.Shegrewupintheapartmentnexttoours.Shewasayearolderthanme.”Heshifteduncomfortably,hisfootbouncinginthewaterasthoughhewerenervous.“WewereascloseasfriendscanbeuntilmyhormonesstartedtorageandIstartedtoseeherasafemale.IcaredaboutheralotandIthoughtshecaredaboutme.”
“Soyoudidhaveagirlfriendwhenyouwereateenager?”Shewasn’tsurewherehewasgoingwithhisexplanation,butshesensedthatitwasimportanttohishistory.
“Yesandno.Iguess.Wekissed,weheldhands.Ihadhorny,teenage-boywetdreamsabouthereverynight.IwantedtogetlaidforthefirsttimeandIwasn’texactlyanattractiveteenager.Iwasquietandskinny,notmuchtolookat.Clumsyashell.Ireadalot.MommadesureSamandIhadbooksfromthelibraryorreadingprograms.ButRoseseemedtolikemeeventhoughIwasagawky,uglykid.”
Kara’sheartcontracted,tryingtopictureayoung,awkwardteenageSimon.Shewaswillingtobethernursingcareerthathehadbeenadorable.
“Shestartedchangingwhensheturnedseventeen.Shedroppedoutofschool,startedhangingwithmyfather’scrowd,wouldn’ttalktomeanymoreorwassodistantthatsheactedlikeIwasnobody.”
Shesqueezedhishands.“Thatmusthavehurt.”
“Itdid.”Hedidn’tbothertodenyit.“Iknewshewasusing,stonedoutofhermindmostofthetime.Ibeggedhertoletmehelpher,butshewouldn’tlisten.Shejustlaughedinmyface,sayingthattherewasnothingIcoulddobecauseIwasaspoorasshewas.Andshewasright,damnit!ButIwantedtohelphergetclean.Andstopworkingthestreets.”
“Shebecameaprostitute?”OhGod,poorSimon.
Shecouldn’tseehim,butshefelthisshouldersliftinashrug.“ShehadtopayforherhabitsomehowandIknowshegavesomeofthemoneytohermomtohelpheryoungerbrother.”
“Youdidn’tgiveup,didyou?”Karadidn’tneedananswer.Shealreadyknew.Simonwasstubbornandtenacious,hisrescuertendenciesstillaliveandwell.Itwasn’tinhisnaturetostoptrying.
“No.IwantedtobelievethattheRoseIknewwasstillinsideher,waitingtocomeoutagain.”Hesnorted.“Itdidn’tmatterhowmanytimesshetriedtoavoidmeortoldmefuckoff,Istilltried.Iwasprettynaive,Iguess.”
No,youweren’t.Youweregood,eventhoughlifehaddealtyouacrappybeginning.YouwereadreamerwhowantedtobelievethateveryonecouldbesavedYoumusthavebeenasguileless,honest,anddirectasyouarenow.Youjustdidn’thideitaswellthen.
“Havinghopedoesn’tmakeyounaive,Simon.”
Helaughed,butitwasself-deprecating.“Iwasgullible.Ididn’tseeherforaboutamonthaftermyfatherdied.Thenonenight,sheshowedupatourapartment,dressedinashortsexyskirtandafriendlysmile.Forateenagemalevirgin…thatwasallittookforme.MomwasworkingandSamhadalreadygonetoFloridatostartaconstructionjobthere.IwasgettingreadytograduatefromhighschoolandSamhadmadeenoughmoneyworkingconstructiontobringustoFloridatojoinhim.”
“Youweregraduatingfromhighschoolattheageofsixteen?”
“Iskippedagrade.Twice.Schoolwasneverdifficultforme,”heansweredinasheepishvoice,likethefactthathewassmartembarrassedhim.
Whywasshenotsurprisedthathewasaboygeniustoo?“So,whathappenedaftershecamein?”
“Shecameontomehotandheavy.Irespondedlikeasixteen-year-oldwhohadnevergottenlaid.Shehadmeinmybedroomwithinminutes.ShewasexperiencedandIlethertakethelead.SheopenedmyflyandhadmydickoutofmypantsandacondomonmebeforeIreallyknewwhatwashappening.”Helaughed,buttherewasnohumorinthehollowsound.“NotthatIwouldhaveobjected.Ihadabeautifulwomanaboveme,readytofuckmesenseless.Iwasateenagerincompleteecstasy.”
Oh.Dear.God.
Karabitbackahorrifiedgasp.Hersuspicionshadtobewrong.Itcouldn’thavehappenedthatway.
“Shehadtheknifehiddeninherbra.”Hisvoicetrembled.
Shewasn’twrong,andthenauseastartedtoriseinherthroat.
“SothereIwas,gettingmyfirstfuck,drowningineroticbliss,neveroncethinkingthattherewassomethingstrangeaboutthewholesituation.ShegrabbedtheknifeandstartedstabbingthemomentIstartedtocome.Ittookmebysurprise.ShehadstabbedmesomanytimesbeforeIrealizedwhatwashappeningthatIdidn’thaveachancetodefendmyself.”Hischestwasheaving,hisvoicestrangledandraw.
Kara’swholebodyquiveringwithemotion,sheturnedinhisarms,straddledhisthighsandwrappedherarmsaroundhisneck.“Why?”sheasked,herquestioncominginashortsob.“Whywouldshedothat?”Buryingherfaceinhisneck,shelethertearsflowuncheckeddownherface.AllshecouldthinkaboutwasthevulnerableteenageSimon,lyinginapoolofblood,dying,justbecausehewasahormonal,typicalyoungman.
Wrappinghisarmstightlyaroundher,heansweredinagraveledvoice,“Revenge.Myfatherdiedbeforehecouldbepunishedforstealingfromapowerfulbossinanorganizedandhugecartel.Theorganizationwassendingamessage,lettingpeopleknowwhathappenstoapersonortheirfamilyiftheytrytostealfromthem.Theycouldn’tletmyfather’sbaddeedgounpunished.Hediedbeforetheycouldsendthatmessage.Iwasjustasubstitute.”
“ButwhyRose?”
“Thebossknewwehadbeenfriendssincechildhood.Herloyaltywasbeingtested.Shewasprettydeeplyinvolvedintheorganization.Theythreatenedtokillhermotherandbrotherifshedidn’tkillme.”Surprisingly,therewasnobitternessinhisvoice.
Shakentothedepthsofhersoul,shechokedout,“Issheinjail?”
“She’sdead.”Hisvoicewasflat.“ShefledassoonasIpassedoutfrombloodloss,obviouslyconvincedthatIwasagoner.Shewentstraighttoanalley,tookalethalamountofdrugsandslitherwristswiththesameknifesheusedtostabme.Theyfoundasuicidenoteandherconfessioninherpocket.Shebeggedforgivenessfrombothhermotherandmine,sayingthatshehadtoprotectherfamily.SheneverknewthatIsurvived.Momcamehomeafewminuteslaterandfoundme.Ifshehadn’t,Iwouldhavebeendead.”
Unabletocontainherhorror,shesobbedintoSimon’sneck,cryingforallofthepainthathehadsuffered,bothemotionallyandphysically.Howdidonesurviveabetrayallikethat?Especiallybyafriend,awomanhehadadored.“I’msosorry.”
“Why?”heasked,soundingperplexed.“Youdidn’tstabme.”Herubbedhishandupanddownherback.“Don’tcry.Idon’tlikeit.”Hisvoicewasdemanding,butherestedhisheadagainsthers,histouchonherbackgentleandcomforting.
Asadsmilecrossedherlipsasshetriedtoreininheremotions.Hiscommentwasso…Simon.Hehadnoideawhyshewascryingforhim,whyshehurtforhim.Beinglovedbyanyoneotherthanhisfamilywascompletelyalientohim.“Tellmeaboutyourinjuries?”
“Ihadstabwounds.Lotsofthem.”Hisvoiceheldaslightlyteasingnote.Hepausedandaskedinamorehesitant,gruffvoice,“AreyougoingtocryagainifItellyou?”
Oh,goodLord.He’stellingmeaboutthemosttraumaticeventofhislifeandhe’sworriedaboutwhetherornotitwillmakemecry?
“I’lltrytocontainmyself.Tellme.”
“Iwasinthehospitalforawhile.Luckyforme,Rosewasalousymurderer.Shemanagedtomissmostofmyvitalorgansandsomeofthewoundswereshallow.Theyhadtodosurgeryandrepairafeworgans,butIlivedthroughit.AssoonasIwaswellenough,SammovedMomandmetoTampa.”Hebreathedalong,masculinesigh.
“Wereyouscared?”shewhisperedagainsthisneck,stillvisualizingayoung,frightened,injuredSimon.Herarmstightenedaroundhisshoulders,wishingshecouldhavebeentheretocomforthim.
“Honestly,Ibarelyrememberanyofit.”Heshookhisheadslightly.“SamsaidMomwasatotalwreck.TheonlythingIrememberwasbeingashamedwhenIwasfinallycoherent.AndsadbecauseRosewasdead.”
Herheadjerkedbackabruptlyinshock.Searchinghiseyes,confused,sheasked,“Why?Youdidn’tdoanythingwrong.”
“IwasdupedbecauseIwashorny.Iwasthinkingwiththeheadbelowmywaistinsteadoftheoneaboveit.Rosecomingontomewasn’tlogical.Itdidn’tmakeanysense.Ishouldhavebeensuspicious.Christ!Allshehadsaidtomeinmonthswastogotohell.Shouldhaveknownsomethingwasn’tright.ButIdidn’tthinkaboutanythingbutgettingoff.”Hisfacewasdarkandtortured.“Iwaspissedatmyself.IputmymomandSamthroughhellbecauseIwasstupid.Iknewbetter.Igrewupintheneighborhood.Isureashellknewhowtowatchmyownback.”
Herpalmliftedtohisface,strokingoverhisjaw,realizingthathehadbeenamaninaboy’sbodywhenhewasinjured,expectinghimselftomakerationaldecisionsevenwhenhishormoneswereraging.Didn’therealize,althoughhemayhavehadtheintelligenceofanolderman,hisbodyhadstillbeenyoung,hismaturitystillthatofasixteen-year-oldboy?“Simon…youweresixteen.Stillaboy.Youmayhavebeenaboygenius,butyouwerestillateenager.”
“Yeah,andIdidn’tgrowuptobeexactly…uh…normal.”Hecaughtherhandthatwasroamingoverthestubbleonhisfaceandbroughtittohismouth.Hekissedherpalmgentlyandentwinedtheirfingers,restingtheirconjoinedhandsoverhisheart.
“No,youdidn’t.Yougrewuptobeextraordinary.Youhavereasonnottotrusteasily.WhathappenedwithDr.Evans?”Sure,heneededtohavecontrol,butgiventhecircumstancessurroundingthetraumaticevent,shewaswillingtobetthatanyonewouldhavetheirdemonsfromthatexperience.Sheknewshewould.
“Hemademetalk.Ihatedit,butIwenteveryweektomakemymomfeelbetter.Afterawhile,itgoteasier.HehelpedmethroughmyfeelingsaboutRose’sdeathandaboutmyfather.ButInevertoldhimwhatreallyhappened.Icouldn’t.Icouldn’ttellanyone.EveryoneassumedthatRosecameinthroughanunlockeddoorandstabbedmewhileIwassleeping…andIjustletthemcontinuetothinkthat.Itseemedeasier.”Hisbodytensed.“Itwasacoward’swayout.”
“Buttheremusthavebeensignsatthescene.Thecondomand-”
“Apparently,Rosehadsomesortoffeelingsforme,someguilt.Therewasnocondomandmydickwasinmypants.NooneeverassumedthatitwasanythingbutanattackonmewhileIwasasleep.Arevengehitagainstmyfather.You’retheonlypersonwhoknows.Icouldn’teventellSam.”Hisvoicetrailedoffinahuskywhisper.
Herheartachedforhim,hersoulneedingtosomehowcomforthim.Pullingherhandfromhis,sheturnedhisfacetohers,forcinghimtomeethereyes.“Listentome.Youwereattackedwhenyouwereyoungandvulnerable.Youhavenoreasontofeelguiltyorashamed.Notonebitofitwasyourfault.Iunderstandwhyyouhavetrustissues.Iunderstandwhyyoupanickedtheothernight.”Shesawdoubtinhiseyesanditpissedheroff.“Butknowthis…yousurvivedandgrewintoagorgeous,sexy,brilliant,successfulmaninspiteofthefactthatyougotarawdealwhenyouwereyounger.You’rethemostincrediblemanI’veeverknown.Doyouunderstandme!?”Herstatementwasfierceandhereyeswereshootingfire.Damnit,heneededtogetitthroughhisthickheadthathewassomeonespecial.
Hiseyesgrewwarmerandhislipstwitched.“Yeah.Igotit.Canwegobacktothesexypart?”
Sherolledhereyes.TrustSimontofocusinononlythesexpartofherstatement.
“Isthattheonlypartyouheard?”shereplied,exasperated.
“No.Butitwasthemostinterestingpart.”Hegrinnedatherunashamedly
Frustrated,shescoopedupahandfulofwateranddroppeditonhishead.“I’mtryingtoexplainsomethingtoyouhere.”
Hegrabbedherwristandpulledherbackintohisbody,creatingarippleinthetubthathadwaterlappingagainsttheirskininagentlecaress.Eyesheatedandintense,hespearedherwithalookthatspokeofpossession,desirethatranmuchdeeperthanlust.“DoyouwanttoknowwhatIunderstand?”
Sheshiveredashisarmsslidtightlyaroundherbody,anchoringheragainsthim.Unabletospeak,shenodded.
Hisvoicelowandraspy,heanswered,“IunderstandthatIhavetobetheluckiestbastardontheplanetbecauseyouloveme,youacceptme.Hell,Ithinkyoualmostunderstandme-whichisafuckingmiraclebecausesometimesIdon’tevenunderstandmyself.Idon’treallyknowhowtoromanceyoulikeIshould,butitisn’tbecauseIdon’twantto.Ijustdon’tknowhow.IunderstandthatbeforeImetyouIwaslivinginaverysmallworld,andsomehowyoudraggedmeintothelight,mademelookaroundandactuallyseethingsthatIneversawbefore.Iunderstandthatyoumakemeabetterman.”Hesnakedahandaroundherneckandplantedafierce,possessivekissonherlips.Pullingawayabruptly,hecuppedherchin,hiseyesmoltenandfierce.“Isthatenoughunderstandingforyou?”
Breathless,shepeeredathimwithherheartinhereyes.Maybehehadn’trepeatedexactlywhatshehadbeentryingtoconvey,butitwasastart.Hewaslearningtobeloved.Buryingherfaceagainsthisshoulder,shemurmuredagainsthisskin,“It’senough.Fornow.”
“Ineedyou,Kara.Don’tleavemeagain.”Hisvoicehoarse,herubbedhisfaceagainstherhair.
Hehadn’ttoldherthathelovedher,buthehadbaredhissoul,sharedhissecrets,madeincredibleleapsinsharinghisemotions.Andhehaddoneitforher.Soyeah,fornow,itwasmorethanenough.“I’mnotgoinganywhere.”
“Damnrightyou’renot!”hegrowled.
Shesmiled,becauseevenashespokethedemandingwords,hewasrockingherinhisarms,holdingherlikeatenderlover.Hewaswrongaboutnotknowinghowtoromanceher.Heshowedherhowmuchhecaredinsomanylittlewaysthatweremind-boggling,seductive,andaddictive.Itwaslikeamissingpieceofhersoulhadfinallyfoundherandclickedintoplace,makingherfeelcomplete.
“Didyouloveher?”Sheknewsheshoulddropthesubject,butshewantedtoknow.
“Who?”
“Rose?Didyouloveher?”
“No.”Hislowvoiceansweredquicklyandwithouthesitation.“IcaredaboutherasafriendandIhadagiganticcrushonher.ButIdidn’tloveher.Ididn’twanthertodie.Thesadpartofthewholethingisthatshediedfornothing.Afewdaysaftershekilledherself,thewholeorganizationwasbroughtdownbytheauthorities.Thebossandeveryoneassociatedwiththecartelaregoingtorotinjail.”
Shecouldhearthesincerity,theacceptanceofthewholesituationinhisvoice.Hewasn’tangry,wasn’tbitter.“Goodtherapist?”
“Yeah.Dr.Evanswasthebest.Westillhavedinneroccasionally.Ithinkhe’sstilltryingtofiguremeout.”Helaughedwithgenuinehumor.
Shesmirkedagainsthisshoulder.“You’reafascinatingsubject.”
“AreyousayingthatI’modd?”hegrowledagainstherneck.
“Hmmm…I’mnotsure.”Sheslidawayfromhimandstood,hatingtoleavethecircleofhisarms,butdyingforsomethingtodrink.She’dbeeninthesteamyroomforquitesometimeandshewasparched.Unabletoresistlookingbackathimassheclimbedthesteps,herhungryeyesroamedhismuscularbodyandhandsomeface.“IthinkIneedtostudyyouabitmorebeforeIcometoanyconclusions.”
Hecametohisfeetinonegracefulmotion,musclesflexing,awickedgrinonhisface.“Sweetheart,ifyoukeepflashingthatsexybodyatme,I’mgoingtobedoingmyownstudying.”Hisgrinwidenedandhiseyesgrewdarkasheprowledafterher,hisbigbodycuttingthroughthewatereasily.“AndIexamineandtestmydataverythoroughly.”
Shescoopedupatowelfromapilenexttothetubandscrambledoutthebathroomdoor,Simonhotonhertrail.Laughingashecaughtheraroundthewaistbeforeshecouldmakeitoutthebedroomdoor,shesquealed,“No.I’mthirsty.”
Ashepulledherbackagainsthiswet,solidchest,shewonderedifshereallyneededwaterallthatbadly.God,hefeltgood.Meltingbackagainsthim,shecouldfeelhishard,insistentarousalagainstherass.
“Areyouthirsty?”Hisvoicechanged,instantlyconcerned.“Didyoueat?”Hetookthetowelfromherhandsandstartedtowipeherbodygently,dryingherbackandturningheraroundtoblotthemoisturefromherbreastsandbelly.
Shebitherlipasshepeekedupathisface,hisexpressionanxiousandslightlyagitated.“I’mnotthathungry.”Herappetitewasincreasingforsomethingotherthanfood.
Bythetimehewassatisfiedthatshewascompletelydry,shewascertainshewasgoingtodieoflust.Themanwasdefinitelythorough.
“Youneedhydrationandfood.”Hegruntedashetossedherhisblacksilkrobeandquicklydriedhisownbody,goingtohisclosettorummageforclothing.Hepulledonasimilargarmentinnavyblue,puttingitonquickly,barelytakingthetimetoyankthetieclosed.
Shenearlywhimperedashecoveredthatglorious,masculinebody.Sheslippedontheblackrobereluctantly,herthirstbeingoverriddenbytheheatbetweenherthighs.AllshewantedatthemomentwastogethorizontalwithSimon.“Seriously,I’mnotthathungry.”
Hegraspedherhandandtugged,pullingheralongbehindhim.“You’lleat.”Hestopped,piercingherwithadark,warningstare.“Iplantofuckyouuntilyoubegformercylater.”
Hernippleshardenedtopebblesandthesmolderingheatbetweenherthighswentupinflames.Hisheatedexpressionmadehershiverwithlonging,everyinchofherskintingling.
I’llbebegging.Butnotformercy.
Withafrustratedsigh,shelethimpullhertowardthekitchen.Sheknewthatstubborn,determinedlookofhis.Hewasdeterminedtosatisfyherneeds,giveherwhateversheneeded.OnecasualmentionofbeingthirstyandSimonwasamanonamission,pushinghisownneedsandwantsaside,takingcareofherfirst.
Andhewonderedwhyshelovedhim?
Herheartturnedoverashesqueezedherhand,leadingherwithfocuseddeterminationtowardfoodandwater.Themanwasatantalizingmixtureofsizzlingmalehormones,intensity,tenderness,vulnerability,andcompassion.Theperfectmalewrappedupinabossy,handsome,irresistiblepackage.
Whydidshelovehim?Shouldn’tthequestionbe…howcouldshenotlovehim?
Shesmiledassheadmittedtoherselfthatshehadneverstoodachanceagainstfallingmadly,completely,andtotallyinlovewiththisman.Somethinghaddrawnhertohimfromthemomenttheymet,somethingelementalandprimal.Maybeshehadbeenafraidtorecognizeitforwhatitwas,butithadalwaysbeenthere.Simonwaslikeaforceofnature-dangerous,yetcompellingbecauseofitsfierce,wild,andrawpower.
Sherememberedhermomoncesayingthattruelovewasnotforthefaintofheart,buttherewardswereworththerisk.Karahadbeenyoung,notevenateenager,andshehadn’tunderstoodthemeaningofhermom’sstatement.
Now,withSimon,themeaningofthosewordswascrystal-clearandsheunderstoodexactlywhathermomhadmeant.Andshehadfinallyfoundthemanwhowaswellworththerisk.
Sendingasilentthank-youtohermotherforthewordsthatithadtakenhermanyyearstounderstand,sheallowedSimontoguideheroutofthehallwayandintothekitchen,asillygrinonherface.Simonpoppedopenthedooroftherefrigeratorwithaflickofhiswrist.“DietCokeorwater?”HereachedfortheDietCoke,alreadyknowinghowshewouldanswer.
“DietCoke,”sheaffirmed,herattentiondistracted.
Heflippedthetoponthecanandhandedittoher.OpeningaregularCokeforhimself,hechuggedhalfofthecontainerdowninseconds.Christ,nowonderKarahadbeenthirsty.Hehadn’tbeeninthesteamyroomaslongasher,buthewasparched.
Liftingthecantoherlips,shedrank,buthergazewasfixedonthearchwaythatledtothediningroom.
Shit,hehadcompletelyforgottenhisearliererrands.“HappyValentine’sDay.”Hegulpedtherestofthecanofsodaandtossedtheemptycontainerinthetrash.
Followingherintothediningroom,hescowled.Shehadn’tsaidoneword.MaybeNinaandMarciehadsteeredhiminthewrongdirection.Wouldshelikeanyofit?
He’dtriedtobeorganizedaboutdeliveringstufftothediningroom:flowersonthetable,candiesonthechairs,jewelryandperfumegiftsonthefloor.Yeah,therewereteddybearsandothermiscellaneousstuffscatteredaroundtheroom,buthehadthoughthehadarrangedthingsfairlywell.“Youdon’tlikeanyofit?”Damnit,hewasfiringhisassistantandsecretaryinthemorning.Theyhadspecificallytoldhimthatthesewerethethingsthatmadewomenfeelgood,special,cherished.
“OhSimon,whatdidyoudo?”Kararanafingertipalongthevelvetysurfaceofaredroseandtappedononeoftheheart-shapedballoons,watchingitswaybackandforththroughtheair.
“Okay.Thosetwoaredefinitelyfiredinthemorning!”Fuck!Hewantedtopleaseher.Instead,shelookedlikeshewastraumatized.Heknewheshouldhavegottenotherthings,buttheVeyronandtheMercedeshadbeenfull.
“Whoareyoufiring?”Sheturnedandlookedathimwithapuzzledexpression.
“NinaandMarcie.Theytoldmethatthesetypesofgiftsmakeawomanhappy.”
Ohhell,hecouldn’tfireeitheroneofthem.Theydidtheirjobstoowell
Honestly,itwashisfaultthathedidn’tknowadamnthingabouthowtoromancehiswoman.Buthewaswillingtotryuntilhegotitright.“Wecouldgoshopping.Picksomethingelse,”hesuggested,hopingshe’dlethimtakeher,seewhatshethoughtwasromantic.
“YouaskedNinaandMarcieforadvice?”
“Yeah.”
“Simon,thisisincredible.Idon’tknowwhattosay.”Hervoicewastremulousasshebentdownandpickedupafluffybrownteddybearandhelditagainstherchestinadeathgrip.“IthinkMarcieandNinaweregivingyousuggestions.Theydidn’tmeanforyoutobuyeverything.”
Damnit.Shesoundedlikeshewasgoingtocry.Hefuckinghopedshedidn’t.“Idon’tknowyourfavoriteflower.Orwhatkindofcandyyoulike.Idon’treallyknowyourfavoritecolor.Shouldn’taguyknowthosethings?Shouldn’tIknowhowtopleaseyou?”heanswered,hisvoicedisgruntled.
Droppingthestuffedbeargentlytothefloor,sheturnedtohim.“Youdidn’tneedtodoallthis.I’veneverevengottenflowersbefore.”
Whatdidhedo?Hewentshopping.Bigfuckingdeal!Sure,he’dusuallyratherhavearootcanalthangoshopping,butforthefirsttime,he’denjoyedit.“Iwentshopping.Itwasn’texactlyabigeffort.”Atthelastminute,becausehehadonlyjustrealizedthatitwasValentine’sDay.Howpatheticwasthat?ThankGodforNina’sthoughtfulhusband!
“Youdidallofthisforme.”Herarmstretchedout,motioningtowardthefulldiningroom.“Theflowersarebeautiful.Ilovethemall.IwantapieceofthatcandysobadlythatIcantasteitalready,andeverythingelseissooverwhelmingthatI’mspeechless.Iwouldhavebeenoverthemoonwithafewflowersoracard.Youdidn’tneedtodothis.It’smoregiftsthanawomangetsinalifetime.Butitisn’tthethingsthatamazeme.It’syou.Yourdesiretomakemehappy.You’rethemostincrediblemanontheplanet.That’swhyIloveyou.”Shetookalongsipfromhercanofsodaandsetitonasmall,availableareaofthetable.
Hecaughtherbodyasitrocketedintohisarms,savoringhersoftnessasshepressedagainsthim.Warmlipsnuzzledhischeekandthesideofhisneck.Ashewrappedhisarmstightlyaroundherwaist,herbodyglidingslowlyalonghisuntilherfeettouchedthefloor,hedecidedthatmaybehewouldgiveMarcieandNinaaraiseinsteadofalectureinthemorning.
“You’reinsane.Youknowthat,don’tyou?”Pullingback,sheplantedaloud,smackingkissonhislips.“ButIlovethataboutyou.”
Okay.Hewaswillingtobebat-shitcrazyifitmadeherlovehimmore.
Givinghimanadoringlook,sheadded,“Butonegiftnexttime,okay?Oracard.”
Oh,hellno.Hewasn’tgettingropedintothatpromise.“We’llsee.”Hisanswerwasnoncommittal.
“Wait.Ihavesomethingforyou.”Shepulledawayfromhimandscamperedtoherroom.
Shereturnedwithasmallgiftbag,decoratedwithheartsandlittledevils.“Thebagwasdefinitelyscreamingyourname.”Shootinghimamischievoussmile,shehandedhimthebag.“Idon’treallyhavemyownmoneytospend,soIhadtoimprovise.”
“Youneedmoremoney?Whydidn’tyoutellme?”Hegloweredather,pissedthatshehadn’ttoldhimthatsheneededcash.
“Idon’tneedyoutogivemeanythingmore.Iwantyoutotakesomeofitback.Ihavealmostahundredgrandinmybankaccount.Idon’tneedit,Simon.”Shemethiseyeswithastubborntiltofherchin.
“Youhaven’tspenthardlyanyofit.Howinthehellareyouliving,takingcareofyourneeds?”
Shesnorted.“Youtakecareofmyneeds.WhatinthehelldoIneedmoneyfor?Idon’thaveonesingleneedorwant.I’mlivinglikeaspoiledbratrightnow.AllIhavetodoismentionsomethinganditmagicallyappears.Idon’tneedtobuyonesinglething.”
“Womenlovetoshop.Buythings.Evenwhentheydon’tneedthem.”Hell,heknewthatmuchfromhismom.Herfavoriteactivitywasshopping.
“Notme.I’dratherbereading.OrplayingMythWorldII,ifIhavetime.Ihaveeverycomfort,everyneedmet.”Shereachedahandtohisface,tracinghislipslightly,runningthebackofherhandsoftlyoverhisfiveo’clockshadow.“TheonlyrecurringneedIhaveisyou.”
Shewastryingtodistracthim,anddamnhim,itwasworking.“Themoneywasagift.You’rekeepingit,”hesnarled,determinedthatshewouldn’tgetherwaybygettinghiscockhard…whichitwas.Extremelyhard.Totallyready.
“I’mnotkeepingit.”Sheplacedasoftkissatthesideofhismouth.“Openthebag.”
Hehadallhecoulddonottostripthatfuck-merobefromherbodyanddevourherwhole.Hiswholebodywastenseasheopenedthegiftbag,tryingnottothinkabouthispulsatingcockandhisnearlyimpossible-to-ignorecompulsiontobedrivingintoherbodyrightatthemoment.
Hisheadjerkedupbeforehecouldfinishthetask,suddenlyrememberingthatheneededtotellKarathattheotherassholewhohadtriedtoabductherwasinjail.“Theycaughttheotherguytoday.He’sinjail.YouprobablyhaveamessagefromHarris.”
“Oh,thankGod.Youcancalloffthesecurity.Ithinktheyintimidatesomeofmyfellowstudents.Theydon’texactlykeepalowprofileanymore.”Hervoicewaslight,butherbodyvisiblyrelaxed.
Hesawthereliefonherface.Nomatterhowmuchshedeniedthatthemanhadbeenathreat,heknewithadbotheredher,knewthatshewasstillfrightened.She’dhavetobeafoolnottobe.Shehadcometoodamnclosetolosingherlifeonthedaytheyhadinjuredher.“Nothappening.Thesecuritystays.”
“Idon’tneedthemanymore-”
“No!Ican’ttaketheriskofsomethinghappeningtoyou.TherearetoomanycrazypeopleoutthereandI’vemadeenemiesovertheyears.”Granted,hehadn’tpissedasmanypeopleoffashisbrotherSamhad,butyoucouldn’tbecomeabillionairewithouthavingafewpeopleouttherewhohatedyourguts.“Thesecuritystays.”
Hepulledontheredtissuepaperinthebag,sendingpiecesofheart-shapedpaperflutteringtothecarpet.Hecaughtoneinhishand,clutchingittightly,beforeithitthefloor.Shedippedahandintothebagandpulledoutthematerialthatlayatthebottom.
Shehelduptheblacksilkboxershortsbytheelastic.Generallyaboxer-briefstypeofguy,hestaredforamomentbeforehislipscurvedupward.Theblacksilkwasdottedwithlittledevilsandhearts.
“They’reso…you,Simon.”Shewiggledhereyebrowsandtheunderwearatthesametime.“You’lllookhot.Notthatyoudon’talready,butallIcouldthinkaboutwashowsexythey’dlookonyou.”Shepulledthematerialtoherface,nuzzlingthesoftsilk.
Hestaredatherwithhornyfascination,imagininghiscockinsidethoseboxershorts,herlipsonthematerial.Holyfuck!Thoseparticularunderwearhadjustbecomehisveryfavorite.Hedidn’tgiveashitifhedidn’tusuallyweartraditionalboxers.
“Ialreadytookthetagsoff.TrythemonsoIcantakethemofflater.”Sheheldthemouttohimwithaseductivesmile.
Hehadhisrobeopeninsecondsandtheshortsoverhishipsamomentlater.Heshudderedashefeltthesoftbrushofherdelicatehandsonhisshouldersassheslippedhisrobecompletelyoff,leavinghimstandingbeforeherinhisnewpairoffavoriteunderwear.
“Hot.Definitelyveryhot,”shewhispered.
Theneedy,breathysoundofhervoicenearlymadehimcomeundone.Actually,helikedthefeelofsilknexttohisskin,caressinghisengorgedmember.Andhepositivelylovedthelookofhungerinhiswoman’seyesastheyroamedoverhisbody,narrowingonthebulgeathiscrotch.
Shedidn’tbothertohideherdesireforhimanditmadehiminsane.“What’sthis?”Heopenedhisfist,exposingthetinycardboardheart.Flippingitover,hesawthehandwrittenwords.
GoodForOneWish!
Helookedupather,perplexed.Shewasworryingherbottomlip,lookinganxious.
“It’saheart-wish.Ididn’treallyhavemyownmoney-”Sheheldherhandupashedrewinanaudiblebreathtoargue.“Don’tstartthatagain.Anyway,Imadetheseup.Youcancashtheminanytime.They’regoodforonewishorfavorthatyouwantfromme.Anythingthatyoucanthinkofthat’sinmypowertograntyou.”
“Anything?”Hisheartpoundedashismindfilledwithimages.
Sheraisedabrow.“AnythingI’mcapableofdoing.”
“IwishyouwouldkeepthemoneyIputinyourbankaccountandnotargueaboutthesecurity.”Feelingalittleguiltythathewasusinghisgiftagainsther,hefrowned.
Shegavehimalookthathismotherusedtogivehimasachild.Itwasthedreaded“I’m-so-disappointed-in-you”look.Fuck!Thathurt.
Shefoldedherarmsinfrontofher.“Thatwishinterfereswithmymoralsandvalues.Plus,that’stwowishes.Notfair.”
“Compromise?”hebreathedsoftly,notlikingthedisgruntledlookonherface.
Herfacesoftened.“I’mopen.”
“Keepthemoneyinyouraccount.Useitifyouneedto.I’mnotsayingyouhavetokeepitforever.Justkeepitfornow.Untilyougraduateandgetajob.Wecanrenegotiatelater.”Ofcourse,he’drefusetotakeitbacklater.Butthiswasnow,andhewantedhertobesafeifanythingeverhappenedtohim.
“Wishgranted.”Sheletherarmsslidedownherbodyandplantedthemonherhips.“Security?”
“Letmeleavethesecurityinplace,butI’llmakethembackoff.You’llbarelyknowthatthey’rethere.Butletmekeepsecurityonyou.”Holdinghisbreath,hewatchedherexpression.“Formypeaceofmind,Kara.Forme.”
“I’lldoitforyouprovidedtheybackoffandquitscaringmyclassmates.Wishgranted.”Shesnatchedthepaperheartfromhishandandtoreitup.
Hedroppedtothefloor,searchingfranticallyfortheotherheart-wishes.“Howmanywerethere?”He’dfoundtwo.Seeinganotheronelyingunderthetable,hecrawledforward,totallyobliviousofthecarpetburnsonhisknees.Hewantedeveryoneofthosebad-boysinhishotlittlehand.Theyweredefinitelymadeofsolidgold.
“Five,”shechokedoutwithalaugh.
Heheavedasighofreliefashesnaggedthelastonefromthecarpet.Ashestood,shehadherhandoutandanexpectantlookonherface.“What?”Nowaywasshegettinganotheronetotearup.
“Youmadetwowishes.Youowemeoneofthose.”
“Icompromised,”hesaidheatedly.Compromiseshouldcountforsomething.Itwasn’tlikehediditeveryday,orforjustanybody.
“Gimme,”sheanswered,wrigglingherfingers.
Oh,hell.Hehadgottenhisway.Mostly.Pullingoneofthesmallheartsfromhispalmreluctantly,hehandeditoverwithagrunt.“CanIhavetheseeveryholiday?”
“We’llsee,”shemutteredvaguely,asecretsmileonherlips,asshetoreupthepaper.
“Whatdidyoumeanwhenyousaidyou’dnevergottenflowers?Youhadalong-termboyfriend.”
Shesighedheavily.“Hedidn’tdogifts.Thoughttheywereawasteofmoney.Especiallyflowers,becausetheyeventuallydie.”
“Nooffense,sweetheart,butwhyinthehelldidyoustaywithhimforsolong?”Hisjawclenched,wishinghecouldbeatthehelloutofherex.
“Ihonestlydon’tknow.Itprobablyhadsomethingtodowiththedeathofmyparents.Imissedthem.Ifeltsoaloneaftertheydied.IguessIwasprettyyoung,vulnerable,andstupid.”Hervoicewasforlorn.
Simonhatedthebastardevenmore.Shehadbeenyoungandalone,stunnedafterlosingherparents.Hewishedhecouldhavebeenthereforherthen.
Buthewasherenow.Hepulledherunresistingbodyintohisarms,vowingtoprotectherfromthismomenton.“Neveragain,baby.You’llalwayshaveme.I’llneverletyoubelonely.”
Neitheroneofuswilleverbelonelyagain.
Hetooktheclipfromherhairanddroppeditonthefloor.Asheranasoothinghandoverthesilkystrands,herealizedthathehadbeenlonelyhisentirelife.He’djustneverreallyrecognizedit.“I’vebeenwaitingforyouforever,”hewhisperedtoherinahuskyvoice.Somehow,hehadknownherfromthemomenthesawher.Notwithhiseyes,butwithhisheart.
AndGod,howheneededher.
Shepulledawayfromhimslightlytoseehisface.Shedidn’tsayanything,butshedidn’tneedto.Hecouldseeherlove,herheartglitteringinhereyes.Hetracedherlipswithhisfingers,movingslowlytohercheeksanddownherneck,savoringthesoftnessbeneathhisfingertips.Hedrewinvisibleinitialsonherexposedcleavage,leftbarebyhistoo-bigrobe.Hisinitials,tracingoverthemagainandagain,needingtostakehisclaimonthiswomanwhodrovehimtoecstasyandtotheedgeofsanity.
“Simon.”Shewhimperedhisname,pullinghisheaddowntoherlips.
Hegroanedintoherembraceasherhandsstrokedoverhisshoulders,lovingthefeelofherfingersonhisheatedflesh,atouchsoexquisitethathisheartwasthunderingagainstthewallofhischest.
Needingtomakeherhis,claimher,hethrusthistongueintohermouthwithdesperation,hisneedsointensethatitwasalmostpainful.Thepossessivebeastinhimsighedassheopenedforhim,lettinghimin,askingformore.Heplundereduntiltheywerebothbreathless,panting.Pullingback,hesuckedinadeepbreath,nibblingatherlowerlip,unabletoseparatehimselffromher,butalsoneedingtohavehernaked.
Hemovedback,cuppingoneofhersilk-cladbreasts,runningafingeraroundtheprominentnipple.“DoyourememberwhatItoldyouaboutthisrobe,”herumbledagainstherlips,tracingthemwiththetipofhistongue.
“Everyword,”sheansweredinalow,sexyvoice.“Ihaveveryfondmemoriesofthisrobe.”
“Metoo,”herepliedhotly,reluctantlyreleasingherandpullingonemoretinyheartfromhisotherhand.“ButrightnowIwishyouwouldgetnaked.”
Withagracefulmove,sheswepttheheartfromhisfingersandtoreitup.Slowly,sheopenedthefronttieofthegarment,lettingthesilkglideeffortlesslyoffhershoulders.Heswallowedhardasherperfectbreastsappearedandthegarmentcaughtatherelbowsforaheart-stoppingmoment,beforeitslidtothefloorinapoolofshimmeringblack.
Hehadtoforcehimselftobreathe,maketheairmoveinandoutofhislungs.Shewassofuckingbeautiful.Soveryhis.
Mine.
“Ilovethesefuckinghearts,”herasped,hishandclenchedtightlyaroundtheremainingtwo.
Hergorgeousblueeyesdanced,buttheywerealsohotwithdesire.“Youwastedthatone.Iwouldhavedoneitfornothing.Ineedyou.”
Ineedyou.
Hissoulechoedherdesire,hisbodyclamoring,clawingtopossesswhatbelongedtohim.Hiscockwasashardasmarble,readytobeburiedinherwet,hotpussy.Atthispoint,hewasafraidhewasgoingtoexplodethemomentheburiedhimselfinsideher.Hetuckedthetinyheartsbeneathaplacematonthetableforsafekeeping.
Shetookastepforward,bringinghersilkenskinagainsthis,makinghimshudder.Herhandflutteredgentlyagainstthematerialofhisboxers,strokinghisready-to-explodecocklikeitwasatreasuredpet.
Hemovedherhandandsweptherupintohisarms,unabletowaitamomentlonger.“Timeforbed.”
“Abouttime,”shemurmuredagainsthisshoulder,obviouslyimpatient.
Immediately,hismindshiftedfromhiscocktothewantingwomaninhisarms.Hiswoman.Sheneededhim,wantedhimtopleasureher,sateherneeds.He’dgethissatisfaction,butshecamefirst.Shewouldalwayscomefirst.Literally.Simondroppedhergentlyonthebed.Sherolledandpoppedopenthedraweronthebedsidetable,jerkingouthisrestraintsandhandingthemtohim.“Tieme.Idon’tmind.”
Please.TiemeandfuckmebeforeIdieoflonging.
Shewaspanting,bothhermindandbodyoutofcontrol.Ifshedidn’thavehismuscular,hotbodypossessingherswithinmoments,shewasgoingtoscream.
Helookedatherwithconfusion.“Youwantmetotieyouup?”
“Iwantyou.Tiemeup.Tiemedown.Whateveryouwant.It’shot.You’rehot.Ijustwantyoutofuckme.Howeveryou’recomfortablewithit.”
OhGod,I’mbabbling.He’smakingmecrazy.
“Sweetheart,thepossessivecavemaninmewouldlovenothingmorethantohaveyouatmymercyandmakeyoucomeuntilyouscream,butIdon’tneedtotieyouup.”Hetooktherestraintsfromherhandsanddumpedthembesidethebed.“ButnowthatIknowitmakesyouhot,I’lldoitanothertime.Rightnow,Ijustneedtowatchyoucome,makelovetoyouuntilneitherofuscanmove.”
Everylightwason.Theyhadn’tshutthemoffearlier.Theexpressiononhisfacewasfierce,tender,andstrangelypeaceful.Shetookadeepbreath,herwholebodyquivering,herpussysaturated,readyforhim.Shebecameintoxicatedashestretchedhimselfoverher,thesilkofhisnewboxersslidingalongthetenderfoldsbetweenherthighs.Sheopenedforhim,moaningashisrock-harderectionpressedfirmlyagainsthermound,stimulatingheralready-sensitiveclit.
Sheclutchedhimtoher,almostafraidthathewouldescape,needingsomesortofreassurancethathewasreal,thathewashers.Shehadnever,everbeenapossessiveorobsessivewoman,butSimonwassoincredible,socompletelyamazing,thatitseemedalmostimpossiblethathereallyexisted,thathewastrulyhers.Sometimeshealmostseemedlikeadream,alovelydreamthattookherexistencefromordinarytoextraordinary.
“Relax,baby,”Simonwhisperedinherear,hiswarmbreathmakinghershiver.
Relaxingherarms,shewrappedthemaroundhisneck,tryingtocontrolherferalinstincttobindhimtoher,protectherselffromeverhavingtolivewithouthim.“I’msorry.IguessI’mfeelingdesperate.”Shehadn’tmeanttosayit;itsoundedpathetic,butitwastrue.Heremotionswereonoverloadandherbodywasclamoringformore.
Hetrailedhot,open-mouthedkissesupthesideofherneck.“NomoredesperatethanIam.EverytimeIhearyourvoice,seeyou,talktoyou,Iwanttogetcloser.Hell,allIhavetodoisthinkaboutyou.”Lightly,histonguelickedherlips,tracingthecontoursofhermouth.“Iwantinsideofyou.Iwantustobefusedsotightlythatyoucannevergetaway.”
Yes.Yes.That’showshefelt.
Hismouthcamedownonhers-nomoreteasing,nomoreseduction.Heinvaded,pillaged,ravishedwithhislipsandtongue,andsheopenedtohimlikeaflowertothesun.Shemoanedashesatedasmallportionofherdesireforcohesion,herhipsautomaticallylifting,wantingotherbodypartstomerge,needingsomerelieffromherhyper-arousedstate.
Hepulledhismouthfromhers,hisbreathingragged.“Fuck!You’resweet.Sosweetandsodamnhot!”Pullingherarmsfromaroundhisneck,hegrippedherwristsandimprisonedthematherside,slidingslowlydownherbody.
Shesquirmed,pullingatherwriststhatwereheldtightly,oneoneachsideofherwaist.Helickedandkissedhiswaydownherchestuntilhereachedherbreasts,makingherwanttoscreamwithfrustrateddesire.
Hewasn’tgentle,andshedidn’twanthimtobe.Histeethabradedasensitivenipple,pullingthetipintohisscorchingmouth,usingbothhisteethandhistongue.
Pleasureandpain.
“Simon.Oh,God.Please.”Herheadthrashedasheswitchedtotheothernipple,torturingher,arousingheruntilshecouldbarelydrawbreath.
Hekeptuphiseroticassaultonherbreasts,laving,gentlybiting,switchingfromonetotheotherwhilehekeptherhandsclampedfirmlyatherside.Thefeelingofbeingathistendermercywasmaddening,intoxicating,breathtaking.
Hismouthdippedlower,movingincirclesoverherbelly,leavingatrailofheatinitswake.
Finally,heletgoofherwrists,usinghishandstospreadherlegswideashemovedbetweenherthighs.“Yousmellsosweet.Likearousedwoman.Mywoman.Minetosatisfy.Myhoneytolickup.”Hegrowled,takingdeepbreaths,thehotexhalationscaressingthetenderfoldsofherpussy.
Herbodynearlyexplodedjustfromhispossessive,completelyaroused,masculinesnarl.“Yes,Simon.Please.Ineedyou.Ineedtocome.”
“Ineedtomakeyoucome.Satisfymywoman.”
Hepushedherlegsup,bendingherknees,openingherforhishungrymouth.
Hisattackwasimmediateandtotallycarnal.Mouthdevouring,tonguepenetrating,heclaimedherpussywithanintensitythatmadehercryouthisnameasherbodyquivered.
Hebreachedthetenderfolds,delvingdeep,lickinguphercreamwithasensualabandonthatleftherbreathlessandwhimpering.Histonguefoundandattackedherswollenclitwithmindlessfocus.
Karaspearedherhandsintohishair,obliviousofanythingotherthanthetotalecstasyherbodywasexperiencingfromhisprimal,animalisticmission.Hewasgoingtomakeherclimax.Hard.
Helavedthetinybudoverandover.Fasterandfaster.Againandagain.
Herbodyshaking,shefistedhishair,pullinghismouthtightlyagainstthepulsatingfleshofherpussy.
Herbodywoundtightly,hernerveendingssizzlingwithheat,shedetonatedwithaforcesopowerfulthatherbackarchedandshetriedtopullawayfromhisrelentlessmouth,thepleasuretoosharp,toovehement.
Grippingherhips,heheldhertightly,makingherridethewavesofthevolatilepleasureasshescreamedhisname.Hedidn’tstopuntilthelastspasmsubsided,leavingheraslimpasawetdishrag.
Stillgaspingforbreathashecrawledupherbodyandlayatherside,sherolledintohisbodyandthrewherarmoverhismassivechest,buryingherheadagainsthisshoulder.
“Feelbetter?”hisvoicewasraspy,butlacedwithamusement.
Shebattedhisshoulderweakly.“Wereyoutryingtokillme?”
“Onlywithpleasure,baby,”hewhispered,hisvoiceheated.
“Well,thenyouweresuccessful.”Sheranherhanddownhischest,tracinghisscars,wonderingwhyamanaswonderfulasthisonehadsufferedsuchpain.Sometimeslifejustwasn’tfair.
Herhandtraileddownhisabdomen,tracingeverytonedmuscle.HewassculptedlikeaGreekstatue.Andhadacockmuchbiggerthanthosedepictedinanyofthosemarblenudes.“You’resogorgeous,”shewhisperedinaweasshefollowedthesilkytrailofhairfromhisnaveldownward.
“I’mstartingtothinkweneedtotakeyoutoaneyedoctor,”herumbled,hisvoicegraveled,butadoring.
“Myeyesightisperfectandsoismyperception.You’resostrong.Handsome.”Herfingerscurledaroundhisengorgedcock.“Andbig.”
Hesuckedinanaudiblebreathasshedippedherhandintohisboxersandswipedherfingertipovertheheadofhiscock,spreadingthemoistureofadropofpre-cumoverthesilkentip,rubbingitgently,slowly.
“Fuck!Ilovefeelingyourhandsonme.It’sthebestdamnfeelingintheworld.”
Grippinghisshaftalittletighter,shestartedtomoveitsensually,provocatively.ThiswassomethingthatSimonhadalwaysmissedbecausehecouldn’tletawomanhaveherhandsfreeduringsex.Untilnow.Simonwouldneverbetame,butthefactthathefeltcomfortablewithhertouch,thatheactuallywantedit,humbledher.Afterallhehadbeenthrough,hetrustedher.
Hegroaned,atorturedsoundbetweenpleasureandtorment.Hislargerhandcoveredhers.“Rideme,sweetheart.Fuckmesenseless.”Hestrippedhisnew,alreadymuch-lovedfavoriteunderwearoff,lettingthemdroptothefloor.
Herheadjerkeduptolookathisfaceashisarmscamearoundher,liftedheroverhim.“Areyousure?”Shewantednothingmoreatthatmomentthantotakethatmammothcockintoherbodyandwatchhimtakehispleasureunderher.Butshewastremblingatthethought,terrifiedofmakinghimlivethroughanotherbadmemory.
“Yeah.Iwanttowatchyourideme.Iwanttowatchyourfaceasyoucomefromridingmycock,”heanswered,hisexpressiondarkanddesperate.
Straddlinghiships,shehesitated,herheartracing.Couldhedothis?Hedidn’thaveto.“Youdon’tneedtoproveanythingtome.Wedon’thavetodothis.”
“Takemeinsideyou,sweetheart.Ineedyou,”hegrunted,hisvoicehuskywithdesire.
Ineedyou.
Thosethreelittlewordshadherliftingup,graspinghisengorgedcockandplacingtheheadattheopeningofherslickchannel.Needsurgedthroughher,anelemental,puredesiretofeelhimfillher,havehimmovinginsideher,asdeeplyasshecouldtakehim.Herhandsonhischest,shemaneuveredupanddown,takinghimslowly,gettingusedtotheangle.Sheloweredagain,takingmostoftheshaftashishipslungedup,tryingtogodeeper.
Big,stronghandsgrippedherhips,pullingherdowntomeethimashesurgedup,theirskinslappingtogethersharplyasshefinallyhadhimdeeplyimbeddedinsideher,fillinghercompletely.Hestretchedher,openedher,heldherhipstightlyastheycompletelyjoined,hiscockburiedtotheroot.
“Christ!Youfeelsogood.Sotightandhot.”Hisvoicewaswild,feral.
Shewatchedhisface,lookingforanysignthatthepositionwastroublingforhim.Therewasnothingbutpleasure.Hisliquidchocolateeyesmetandheldhersfast.Hishandsguidedherstrokes,hishipsmovingupwithpowerfulthrusts.
Theireyesstayedlockedandateartrickleddownhercheekasshesawnosignoffearinhim,nodoubtofwhohewasfucking.
“Onlyyou,Kara.It’sonlyeverbeenyou,”hetoldher,hischestheaving.“Youlooksobeautiful.Letgo.Rideme.Comeforme.”
Shelethereyesflutterclosedashepummeledher,holdingherhipsinhisstronghands.Herheadfellbackassheletherselfbeconsumedbythepoundingstrokesofhiscock,thefrictionofhisfuriousthrusts,thefeelofhimowningheragainandagain.
Herbreastsbouncedwithhispowerfulentries.Sheliftedherhandsandcuppedthem,pinchingthemlightly.
“Yeah.Takewhatyouwant,sweetheart.Whateveryouneed.”Hepantedheavilyashisstrokesbecamedeeper,harder.
Herfingerspluckedathernipplesashisgriponherhipsgottighter,moredemanding.Sherodehimhard,grinding,takinghimsodeepthatsheshuddered.
Throwingherheadback,sheimploded.Themusclesinthewallsofherchannelclenchedandreleased,repeatedlysqueezingthecockinvadingher.Asherbodyquivered,shefelthisbodytensebeneathhers.
Shewatched,theireyesmeeting,ashecame.
Hewashotandwild,masculineandperfect.Thelow,reverberatingsoundthatrippedfromhisthroatwasthemostbeautifulsoundshehadeverimagined.
Ahot,explosivestreamemptiedintoherwombandtheybothcollapsed.Shecouldfeelhisbodytremblingasherbodycrumpled,coveringhimlikeablanket.“Iloveyou,”shemurmuredwithasighagainsthischest.
Hisarmscamearoundher,holdinghertightlyagainsthisbody.Theywerebothsweatyandspent,butshefeltsocomplete,socontent.
Ittookawhileforherbreathingtoreturntonormalandherracinghearttoquiet.ShestartedtocrawloffSimon’sbody,tomovetohisside,buthewouldn’tlether.Hegruntedandpulledherbackoverhim.“Stay.”
Itshouldhavepissedheroffthathewasgivingheradogobedienceorder,butthewaythathesaidit,withsuchlonginginhisvoice,madehersmile.Shewasalsososatedthatshecouldbarelymove.
Shesnuggledherheadbackontohisshoulder,determinedtogetuptheenergytomoveshortlyorshewouldendupcrushingthepoorguy.
Hisbreathingbecamedeepandeven,hisarmsstilllockedaroundher,butrelaxed.
He’ssleeping.Wejusthadsexinhisnightmareposition.Andhe’ssleepingwithmeontopofhim.
Herheartflippedandabone-deepachepenetratedherbody.Hetrustedhersomuchthathecouldbeateasewhenhefeltmostvulnerable.Sheturnedherheadandkissedhimlightly,herheartoverflowingwithloveforthisman.
Thismanwhoputherneedsfirst.
Thismanwhotrustedher.
Thismanwhowouldgotoanylengthstopleaseher.
Thismansheloved.
She’dalwaystreasurehistrust,nurtureitasthoughitwereprecious.Whichitwas.
Exhaustionmadehereyesclose,herbodyrelax.
Really,youneedtorolloffSimon.Itcan’tbeacomfortablewaytosleep
Herbreathingbecamedeeper,matchingthesamerhythmasthemanbeneathher.
Theywokethenextmorninginthesameposition,completelyrestedandcomfortable.Simonpacedthecourtyardoftheelegantresortwithafrown.
Washeabouttomakeabigmistake?Whatifshewouldn’thavehim?Thelastsixweekshadbeenthehappiestofhislife.Didhereallywanttoscrewthatup?
Helookedoutatthewater,relivingthosememorieswithacontentedsigh.
Idon’twanttoscrewitup.ButIneedher.Iwanthertobemine.Theneedtobrandherashis,tostakehisclaim,wasnearlyoverwhelming.
Lookingtowardtheoutsidedoortotheirsuitemadehimshudder.Fuck!Whywasthissohard?HeandKarasharedeverything.Therewasn’tacornerofhisheartandsoulthatshedidn’tknow.
Hisphonevibratedinthepocketofhissuitjacket.Hewasinasuitandtie,anditwasn’tevenadamnworkday.HewascurrentlyinOrlando,tovisitDisneyworldofallplaces,torealizeoneofKara’sdreams.IncrediblethatawomanbornandraisedinTampahadneverbeentoDisneyworld!
Ofcourse,neitherhadhe.But,thenagain,hehadcometoFloridaasanalmost-adult.
Heclenchedhislastheart-wishinhispalm,squeezingituntilhishandwaswhite,hisbloodcirculationnearlycutoff.
Hehadsavedonewish.Theotheronehadbeenusedtogethertocomeonavacationtripduringherspringbreak.Hehadgivenhertheheartamonthagoandtoldherhewishedthathecouldtakehersomeplacethatshewantedtovisitduringherspringbreak.
Okay.Yeah.HeexpectedParis,London,theOrient,orevenAfrica.Instead,shehadmumbledquietlythatshehadalwayswantedtogotoDisneyworld.Barelymorethananhour’sdrivefromTampa,andwithaprivatejetavailablefortravelanywhereintheworld,hehadn’texpectedthistobeherdreamvacation.
Granted,ithadactuallybeenfun.Heespeciallylikeditwhenshegotscaredonarideandthrewherselfinhisarmswithashriekandadelightedlaugh.Tonightwastheirlastnightattheresort,andhewastakinghertodinnerinoneofthebestrestaurantsinOrlando.Hejusthopedthattheyhadsomethingbigtocelebrate.
Fishinghisphonefromhisjacket,helookedatthecallerID.Hudson,Samuel
“What?”hesnarledintothephone.
“Didyouaskheryet?”
Simonnearlylaughedattheslightlynervousvoiceontheotherendofthephone.SamactedlikethiseventwasjustasimportanttohimasitwastoSimon.“No.She’sgettingreadyfordinner.”
“You’vehadaweek.Whatthehell?”
“Whatdoyoucare?”Actually,SimonknewverywellwhySamcared.He’dletitslipthatifKarasaidyes,SamwouldverylikelybeseeingMaddieReynoldsagain.
“She’sgoodforyou.Youneedher.Plus,Idon’twanttoputupwithyourshittymoodifshesaysno.”
Shewasn’tgoingtosayno.Shecouldn’tsayno.Hewouldjusthavetoconvinceher.Anythingelsewasnotanoption.
Thedooroftheirsuiteopened,andSimonlostallinterestinhisconversationwithSam.“I’llcallyoulater.”
“Askher.”
Simonclickedoffthecallandpocketedhisphone,hiseyesneverleavingthebeautifulwomaninred,framedinthedooroftheirsuite.
God,she’sincredible.WillIevergetusedtothesightofher?
Mostlikely…not.Itdidn’tmatterwhereshewas,orwhatshewaswearing,hestartedhavingpalpitationsthemomenthesawher.
Tonight,dressedinaredcocktaildressthatflirtedwithherknees,andapairofmatchingheels,shetookhisbreathaway.Herhairwasdown,tinystrandsrufflingfromtheslightoceanbreeze.
“Youlookbeautiful,”hetoldhertruthfullyashereachedherside,plantingalightkissonherlips.Youlooklikeafuckinggoddess.
Everyday.Everysingletimehesawher.
“Thanks.You’relookingveryhandsomeyourself,Mr.Hudson.Areweready?”sheasked,shootinghimahappysmile.
I’mready.Readytostripoffthatsexydressandseewhatkindofunderwearyou’rewearing.ThenI’llstripthemoffwithmyteethandfuckyouuntilyouscream.
Hiscockwasrock-hard,butthatwasnothingnew.Ithappenedeveryday,everytimeshesmiledathim.Orwhenshedidn’tsmileathim.Whenshefrowned.Whensheargued.Fuck!Hermerepresencewasallthatwasrequiredtogivehimanerection.
Orhervoice.Orjustthethoughtofher.Damn…hewaseasywhenitcametoKara.
“Injustaminute.”Heguidedherbackinthedoor,closingitbehindhim.“Ineedtotalktoyou.”
Hersmilefadedandhewantedtokickhimself.
“Issomethingwrong?”sheasked,hervoicesuddenlyconcerned.
“No.”Hesatonaleathercouchintheopulentsuiteandpulledherdownintohislap.“Ineedtoaskyousomething.”
Doit.Justdoit.Beforeyougocrazy.
Heopenedhisclenchedfist,showingherhisfinalheart-wish.
“Don’twasteitonaskingforsex,’causeI’mprettymuchasurething,”sheanswered,laughingsoftly.
Heslidheroffhislapandseatedherbesidehim.Reachingintohispocket,hehandedherasmallbox.
Shelookedathim,thentheheart,andthenthebox.Takingtheboxinherhand,sheliftedthelidslowly.
“Iwishthatyouwouldmarryme.”Hisvoicewashuskyandfilledwithparthope,partfear.
“Oh,myGod.Simon,Ididn’texpectthis.”Shepulledthehuge,sparklingdiamondring,housedinaplatinumsetting,fromitsvelvethome,herfingerstrembling.“Idon’tknowwhattosay.”
“Sayyes.Please.”SayyesorI’mgonnaloseit.
Shelookedathimwithastunnedexpression.“Youwanttomarryme?Simon,youhaven’teventoldmethatyouloveme.Iassumedyoujustweren’tready.Ididn’texpectthis.”
Howinthehellcouldshenothavesuspected?She’downedhisheart,body,andsoulforwhatseemedlikeforever.“Iloveyou.Iloveyou.Iloveyou.”Surelyhehadsaidthattoherbefore?“Ido.Ican’tbelieveI’veneversaidit,butyouhadtohaveknown.”
Shesmiledupathim.“Iknow.Ijustwasn’tsureifyouwerereadytosayit.”
“I’mmorethanfuckingready.You’remineandIwantitofficial.”Hiseyeswereintense,hisbodytight.“IshouldhavetoldyouthatIlovedyou.I’llmakesureyouhearitsooftenfromnowonthatyou’llbetiredofhearingmesayit.Youdeservetoheariteveryfuckingday.MaybeIhaven’tverbalizeditbecausetherearen’treallywordstoexplainhowIfeelaboutyou.Loveseemslukewarm,notenough.ButIlovehearingitcomingfromyourlips.Ishouldhaveknownthatyouwantedtohearit.”Hesighed.“You’remylife,sweetheart.Pleasebemine.Mineforever.”
Shethrewherselfintohisarms.Hewrappedhisarmsaroundherandclosedhiseyestightly,knowingheheldhiswholeworldinhisarmsatthatverymoment.
“Mineforever,”shebreathed,closetohisear,hervoiceincredulous.
Hepulledbacktolookatherface.Shewascrying,tearsspillingfromhereyesinanendlessstream.
“Don’tcry.Idon’tlikeit.”
“Iknow.Butthey’rehappytears.”
Fuck!Cryingwascrying,andhehatedtoseehercry.Hepluckedtheringfromhertremblingfingersandgraspedherhandgently,slidingtheringonherfinger.Hisheartracedashestated,“You’remarryingme.”
“Ithoughtyouwereasking.”Sheshothimanamusedlook.“Ihaven’tsaidyes.”
“Youwill,”hewarned,hisexpressiondark.“Saythatyouwill.”Sayit.BeforeIhaveadamnheartattack.Sayit.Now.Rightfuckingnow!
Shepriedhisfistopenandpickuptheheartgently.Shetoreitup,lettingthetinypiecesscatteroverthecouch.“Wishgranted.”
Heblewoutarelievedbreath,hishearthammering.“Yes?”
“Yes.I’llmarryyou.Iloveyou,too.”
“Soon,”hedemanded.
“We’llsee.Compromise?”
“No!”Hetookherhandinhisandgentlykissedtheringhehadplacedonherfinger.“Nocompromisethistime.”
Shewrappedherarmsaroundhisneck,droppingasoftkissonhislipsasshecaressedthenapeofhisneck.“Asmallcompromise?”
“No.”
Hegroanedasshepulledhisheaddownandgavehimatoe-curling,hotembracethathadhimpantingintheaftermath.
“Youcangivealittle,”shetoldhiminalow,persuasivevoice.
Hegrowledasherhandmoveddownhischestandpalmedhiserectionthroughhispants.“Areyoutryingtoseducemeintocompromise?”
“Maybe.Isitworking?”sheansweredinherirresistible“fuck-me”voice.
“Hellyes,it’sworking,”hegrowled,pullingherintohisarms.“Fine.We’lltalkterms.Later.”Hestoodandpulledhertoherfeet.
Fuck!Hewaseasy.
“Later,”sheagreed.“Muchlater.”Shegrabbedhistieandtugged,leadinghimwillinglytowardthebedroom.
Maybebeingeasywasn’talwaysabadthing.
Theymisseddinnerandorderedroomservicehourslater.Inthehoursprecedingtheircelebratoryengagementdinnerinthesuite,Simonlearnedthatcompromisewasn’tbadatallandthatbeingeasycouldbeavery,verygoodthing
~*~TheEnd~*~ThisoneisforthewonderfulreadersofTheBillionaire’sObsessionserieswholovedSimonandKaraasmuchasIdoandwantedtoseemoreofthem.Thankyouforfollowingtheseriesandlookingforwardtoeachnewbookwithenthusiasm.
>Also,manythankstoKarmafortheselflessthingsyoudoformeasafriendandacritiquebuddy.Pleasegetwellsoon.
~J.S.~“Canwetalk?”
SimonHudsonflinchedasheglancedupfromhiscomputerscreentoseehisfiancée,Kara,standingattheentrancetohishomecomputerlab,assheutteredthethreelittlewordsthathesworeeverymaninAmericaprobablydreadedhearingfromthewomanheloved.Afterlivingwiththegorgeousbrunetteforoverayear,seeingthatfamiliarcrinkleofconcentrationbetweenherbeautifulblueeyes,Simonknewexactlywhatwasabouttohappen.Canwetalk?Thosewordsmurmuredinthathusky,low,andseductivevoiceofherswasactuallyawarning,asignthatshewasabouttobroachatopicofconversationthatheabsolutely,positivelydidnotagreewithordidn’twanttotalkabout.
Hegrabbedthemugbesidehiscomputer,takingaslugofcoffeeandwishingitweresomethingalittlestronger,eventhoughitwasbarelyeighto’clockinthemorning.ThelasttimeKarahadwantedtotalk,she’dbadgeredhimaboutherpersonalsecurity,wantinghimtodecreaseit.Thatwassonothappening.Shealreadyhadfarlesssecuritythanhewouldliketoseetailingherlusciousasseveryday.Swallowinghard,tryingtogetthecoffeedownaroundthehugelumpinhisthroat,hetriednottonoticehowadorableKaralookedinapairofbabypinkmedicalscrubsasshesashayedintohisoffice.Evenafterayear,justthesightofher,thesoundofhervoice,thethoughtofher,herenticingscent-anythingthatevenremindedhimofKara-hadhimcompletelyenthralledandhiscockinstantlystandingatattention.SimonhadconvincedhimselfthathisobsessionwithKarawouldcalmdownaftersometimehadpassed,settlingintoamorerationallove,onethatdidn’tmakehimcompletelyinsane.Ithadn’t,andhehadbeenseriouslydeludinghimselftothinkthathecouldfeelanythingotherthancompletelyirrationalthoughtswhenitcametoallthingsKara.Ifanything,hisfixationhadgottenworse.
I’magoddamnbillionaire,co-ownerofoneofthemostpowerfulcorporationsintheworld,sensibleineveryotherareaofmylife.Howcanonewomanmakemesocrazy?
Karasmiledathimasshestoppedinfronthisdesk,makinghisragingerectionstrainagainstthezipperofhisjeansandhischestachewithhappiness.Everyfuckingtimehelookedather,Simonwasconstantlyamazedthatthisincrediblewomanwashis,hadacceptedhimcompletely,withallofhisfaults.
Mine.
Simonwantedtoreachedacrossthedeskandfreethatsilkenmanefromitsconfiningponytail,pullherintohislapandkissthosesmilingripelipsuntilshemadethoseneedylittlenoises,abandonedmoansthat…
“Simon?”Kara’squestioningvoicejerkedhimoutofhiseroticfantasies.Damnit.
Canwetalk?
Oh,hell.Didhehaveachoice?Hesmiledupather,butansweredcautiously,“Whatdidyouwanttotalkabout?”
“Ineedyoutoreadsomethingandsignit.It’snobigdeal.”Shedroppedseveralpapersonhisdesk,fastenedtogetherwithapaperclip.
Scanningthetopdocumentquickly,hiseyesflyingovertheprintedwords,heansweredinabewilderedvoice.“Thisisacontract.Aprenuptialagreement.”Heflippedthepagesquickly,nostrangertocontractsandlegaldocuments.Itdidn’ttakelongforhimtosearchoutthepertinentinformation.“Whatinthehellisthis?”
Shesighed.“Ihadanattorneydrawitup.We’regettingmarriedinamonth.You’reabillionaireandI’mabrandnewregisterednursewithoutapennytohername.It’shardlyanequalarrangement.Ithinkit’sonlyfairthatyou’reprotected.I’vealreadysignedit.Ijustneedyoursignature.Please.”
Eyesnarrowingintoadangerouslook,heraisedhisheadandshotheramulishglance.“Nothappening,sweetheart.Christ,youaren’tallowingyourselfanything.Whatattorneywouldevenagreetothisfortheirclient?You’reneverleavingmeandI’msureashellneverleavingyou.Tilldeathdouspart,what’smineisyours,etc.etc.”
Karaproppedherhandsonherhipsandmethisferociousstarewithoneofherown.
Uhoh.Simonwaswellacquaintedwiththatlook,thatornerytiltofherchin,buthe’dbedamnedifhewaslosingthisdisagreement.Noprenuptialagreement,nodivorce.Ever.He’dneversurviveit.Thestubbornwomanstandingbeforehimhadbecomehisentireworld,holdinghishappinessinherdelicatehands;she’dyankedhimoutofhispreviouslylonely,emptyexistence,forcinghimtofacehisissueshead-on,changinghiswholelifefromdysfunctionaltoextraordinary.Losingherwasnotanoption.
“Thingshappen,Simon.Yousavedmylife.Wearen’tequalsfinancially.Ioweyouthis.”Hervoicewasfrustrated.
ThewheelsonSimon’scomputerchairscreechedashestood,stalkingKaraashemovedaroundthedesk.“Thingsdon’thappentous.Andyoudon’towemeadamnthing.Youdon’tletmebuyyouanythingwithoutamajorargument;youwon’ttakeapennyofmymoney.I’mwillingtobeteverythingthatIhavethatyou’vebarelytouchedthemoneyIputinyouraccountoverayearago.”Takingadeepbreath,Simontriedtocontainhisemotions,pushingdownruthlesslyonthehurtandpossessivenessthatweretryingtoclawtothesurface.TherewasnothinghewantedmorethantogiveKaraeverything,thingsshehadneverhadbeforeshemethim,butshewouldn’tallowhimtodomuchmorethanputaroofoverherheadandfeedher,anditwaskillinghim.Damnit,Kara’slifeshouldbeeasiernowthatshewasgoingtobehiswife.Spendingherentirelifeinpoverty,workingherassintotheground-Simonwantedthingstobedifferentforhernow;neededtogiveheraworry-free,happylifeafterthehellshehadbeenthroughjusttosurvive.Godknewhehadtheresources.
Karablewoutashakybreathbeforeanswering,“Yourescuedmefromthestreets,Simon.Youshelteredme,caredforme,mademefallmadlyinlovewithyouandlovedmeinreturn.You’vegivenmeeverysinglethingawomancouldeverwant.Letmegiveyouthis.”
Bullshit.Notenough.Notenough.Shedeservesmore.ProbablyabettermanthanIam,butIcan’tgiveherup.
Shudderingashebreathedinherunique,femininescent,Simonturnedheraround,slappingahandoneachsideofthedesk,imprisoningher.Denyingthiswomananythingshewantedwashellsincesheaskedforsolittleexcepthislove,butherefusedtogiveinthistime.Shehadhislove,hisbody,hismind,hisfuckingsoul.Obviously,hiswomanhadn’tyetrealizedthatshehadhimbytheballseveryminuteofeveryday
Mine.
Hismouthnuzzledherear,crowdingheragainstthedesk,shovinghisbodyintohersjusttofeelthoselushcurvesmoldedagainsthim.God,howhelovedthewayherbodysurrenderedtohim,yieldedtohim,meldingthemtogetherwithherwillingnesstoaccepthimasthoughhisfleshwaspartofher.
Kara’sarmssnakedaroundhisbody,herhandswanderingbeneathhist-shirt,hertouchsettingfiretohisalreadyhotskin.Hegroanedassheplasteredherbodyagainsthim,strokinghisback,rotatingherhipsagainsthisswollencock.
Hismouthnexttoherear,Simongrowled.“Nocontracts.Nothingbetweenus.Notnow.Notinthefuture.You’remine.You’llalwaysbemine.”
Herirresistiblefragrancesurroundedhim,drowninghimindesire,hisbodybegginghismindtotakeher.Feralneedengulfedhimandhepulledherheadbackgentlybyherponytail,coveringhermouthwithhisasshepartedherdeliciouslytemptinglipstoargue.
Karawhimperedasweetlittlesoundofneedashismouthdevouredhers,Simonswallowedthenoisewithhungrylips,desperatetoclaimhiswoman,tobrandherwithhistouchuntilshecouldthinkofnothingbuthim,needednothingbuthim.Shetastedlikecoffee,peppermint,andpurecarnaldesire,anditnearlydrovehimmad.Heplundered,takinghermouth,groaningashertongueslidalonghis,claiminghim.Hisheartthunderedagainsthischestwall,wantingtotellherthatshehadownedhimforever,sincethefirstmomenthesawher.Probably,ifhewashonest,longbeforethat.Hehadwaitedalifetimeforthewomanheheldinhisarms,andhewouldneverlethergo.
Releasingherlipsreluctantly,SimonburiedhisfaceinthesideofKara’sneck,pantingforairandstrugglingforcontroloverhisrampant,covetousemotions.Hishandssliddowntohershapelyass,cuppingit,pullingtheheatofhercoreagainsthisswollencock.
“Simon,”Karamoanedinherhuskyfuck-mevoice,herwarmbreathwaftingoverhisear.
Animalinstinctslammedhiminthegut,uncontrolledandwild.Nothing,absolutelynothing,wasimportantatthatmomentexceptthedrivingdesiretosatisfyhisneedymate.
“Iloveyou,”shepantedrestlessly,herteethbitinggentlyathisneck
Thistime,herwordswentstraighttoSimon’sheart,thepleasurablepainstrikinghimdirectlyinthechest.“Iloveyoutoo,sweetheart.”Restinghisforeheadagainsthershoulder,heclosedhiseyes,flooredbythestrengthofheremotions,humbledbythefactthatthiswomantrulylovedhim.Him.Theman.Notthebillionaireorthematerialthingshecouldgiveher.Heborethescarsofhispast,insideandout,butKaraneverseemedtoseeanythingexceptamanworthloving.Shewasamiracle,hismiracle.“Nomoretalkaboutprenuptialagreements,okay?”
Hefelthersilkyhairbrushagainsthisjawassheshookherhead,pullingbackslightlytomeethiseyes.Frowningathim,sheanswered,“Wehavetotalkaboutit.”
Nope.Theysureashelldidnothavetotalkaboutit.Shecoulddropthewholeridiculousideaandjustkisshimagain.Andagain.Simonwasn’tabouttomakethemostincredible,happiesteventofhislifeintoafuckingcontract.“YouknowIalreadyrevisedmywill.Wewentoverit.”He’dmadedamnsureKarawouldalwaysbetakencareof,nomatterwhathappenedtohim.
Shenoddedslowly.“It’sonethingifyouleavemeunwillinglybydeath.Butwhatif…”
“Nothappening,”herepliedswiftly,hisjawtighteningatthethoughtoflosingKara.“Thisisforever.I’mnotsigningadamnprenuptialagreement.YouandIarenotafuckingbusinessdeal.Thisisaboutyouandme.Together.Fortherestofourlives.”Simon’sgreen-eyedmonsterwasclutchingathim,irritatedatthepossibilitythatanythingcouldtakethiswomanawayfromhim.Nothappening.
Pushingagainsthischest,shewriggledoutofhishold.“IwantyoutoknowthatI’mnotmarryingyoubecauseofyourmoney.”Hervoicewobbledandherlowerliptrembled.
Oh,fuck.No.“Don’tcry.Idon’tlikeit.”Actually,hehatedit.Seeinghercrypracticallybroughthimtohisknees,madehimwanttogiveintojustaboutanythingshewanted.Luckily,sherarelycriedunlessitwastearsofjoyandKaraneverusedhisweaknessatseeinghercryasaweapon.“Andit’salwaysbeenquiteobviousthatyouaren’taftermymoney.”Morethanobvious.
Givinghimawide-eyed,astonishedglance,sherepliedhotly,“Howcanyouknowthat?YousupportedmewhileIfinishednursingschool,paidmyexpenses,buymeoutrageouslyexpensivegifts.Iwantyoutobeabletotrustmecompletely.”
Shit!Seriously?Thewomankneweveryoneofhisdirtylittlesecrets,thingsthathehadneverrevealedtoanothersoul,notevenhisbrother,Sam.“I’vetrustedyouwitheverydetailofmylife,Kara.Itrustyou.Iwouldn’tbemarryingyouifIdidn’t.Idon’tneedaprenuptialagreement.Idon’twantone,”herasped,tryingtosquelchhisanger,hishurtoverthefactthatasmuchashehadpouredouthissoultoher,shestilldidn’tcompletelytrusthimorthefactthattheirrelationshipwouldnevercometoanend.“Ifyouhadenoughfaithinme,youwouldn’tneediteither.”
IttookSimonaboutananosecondtoregretthewords,wantingtotakethembackthemomentthattheylefthisstupidmouth.Kara’sbeautifulfacefell,everyounceofhurtshowinginherexpressiveeyesthatwerefillingwithtears.Shit.Whatkindofdumbassstatementwasthat?InsteadofappreciatingthefactthatKarawantedhimsomuchthatshewaswillingtogiveupanyfinancialgainfromtheirmarriagejusttoshowhimhowmuchshecared,Simonhadslungthehurtfulwordsatheroutoffrustrationandmorethanalittlefear.Andthewordsweren’ttheleastbittrue.Karahadalwayshadfaithinhim,evenwhensheprobablyshouldn’thavehadany,evenwhenhehadn’thadfaithinhimself.Problemwas,hewantedmore,neededhertobelieveinthemasacouple.Althoughshebalkedwheneverheboughthersomethingbecauseofherpastfinancialsituation,Karahadneverseemedtoquestionthefactthattheyweresoulmates,destinedtobetogetherforever…untilthelastfewweeks.Herrecenthesitancescaredhim,terrifiedhimintostartingtoconsiderthatmaybeitwasshewhomightwantoutsomeday.Hernotionthatsheowedhimanddidn’twanttoshareeverything,especiallyhiswealth,botheredtheshitoutofhim.Itmadeeverylingeringinsecurityhehadjumpuptobitehimintheass.
Spearingahandthroughhishairwitharemorsefulsigh,hetoldhersoftly,“I’msorry.Ishouldn’thavesaidthat.”
Hewatchedhercarefully,hisheartbreakingasKaraangrilyswipedawayatearthatescapedfromherliquidblueeyesassheanswered,“Youwouldn’thavesaiditiftherewasn’tsometruthtoit.Maybeyou’reright.Maybethisisallamistake.”
Hiseyesturneddarkandturbulent.“Whatkindofmistake?”
“Us.”Shegesturedathimandthenatherself.“Maybeweshouldn’tbeconsideringmarriagerightnow.Maybethere’sjusttoobigadifferenceinourcircumstances.”Handsshakingnervously,sheswipedatbothhereyes,thetearscomingsofastshecouldn’tkeepupwiththem.
What.The.Hell.He’dwaited,fightingagainsteveryinstincthehadtomakeherhiswifeimmediately,fornearlyayear.Andnowshewasquestioningtheirupcomingmarriage?Becausehewaswealthy?Itwasn’tlikehismoneywassomethingnew,somethingunknown.He’dbeenabillionairelongbeforetheymet.Cursingunderhisbreath,Simonsteppedforward,reachingforKara,butshepulledfree,backingawayfromhimwithastrangledsob.Droppinghishands,hefistedthemathisside.Jawclenched,heforcedhimselfnottoreachforheragain.Intheyearthattheyhadbeentogether,heandKarararelyfought,andhehadneverseenherlookthisfragile…exceptforthetimeshehadbeenattackedandnearlykilledbytwoviolentjunkies.Eventhen,shehadn’tlookedthisfreakedout.Whenhiswomanwasreallyangry,shegotinhisfaceandtoldhimoff.Theirargumentsfiredhotandblewoverquickly,usuallyresolvedwithacompromiseandearth-shatteringmake-upsex.
Didwewaittoolong?Isshegettingcoldfeet?
WishinghehadjustthrownheroverhisshouldernearlyayearagoandsweptherawaytoVegasonhisprivatejet,Simonanswered,“Wearegettingmarriedandyouneedtotellmewhat’sreallygoingon.”Tryingtokeephistemperandhisvoicelevel,Simonclenchedhisfistsharder,nearlycuttingoffallthebloodcirculationtohisfingers.Karahadneverbackedawayfromhim,rebuffedhisattemptstocomforther.Whathadhappenedtothewomanwhowouldthrowherselfintohisarmswheneversheneededhim?And,damnit,hewantedhertoneedhim.Herrejectionwaskillinghim.
“Idon’tknowifIcanmarryyou.”Herstatementwasreleasedwithamournfulsob.
Screwit.Simoncouldn’twatchhertearsanotherdamnmomentandhedidn’tforthelifeofhimunderstandwhatshewastryingtosay.Allheknewwaspanic,desperation,andpain.Panicatthethoughtoflosingher,desperationtofixwhateverwaswrong,andanunholyagonyfromhearinghersaythatshewasn’tgoingtomarryhim.Tohellwiththat.“You’remarryingme.Nofuckingprenuptial.Ineedyou,Kara.I’llalwaysneedyou.Pleasedon’tdothis.”Hisstatementwaslow,dangerous,spokenlikehewasbarelyabletocontainhiscavemaninstincts…whichhewas.Rightnow,hewantedtopinhertothewallandgetinsidehersodeeply,takehersothoroughly,thatsheneveragainconsideredsayingthatshecouldn’tmarryhim.Hell,ifsheneededareminderofhowtheyfittogether,howmuchhewantedandneededher,he’dbegladtogiveittoher.Righthere.Rightnow.
Eyeswild,Karabackedupashefollowedslowly,stalkingheruntilhehadherpinnedtothewallbesidethedoor.Hereyesshottohisface,thenthedoor,andbacktohisface.
“Don’teventhinkaboutit,”herumbled,slammingahandbesideeachofherarms,boxingherin,cuttingoffanyhopeofherescape.“Talktome,”hedemandedroughly,needingtosootheherpain…andhisown.Afterspendingthelastyearblissfullyhappywithawomanhelovedmorethanlifeitself,Kara’ssuddenirrationalbehaviorwasoutinleftfield.Hewasusuallytheonewhowasacontrolling,dominantassholeandKarawashisvoiceofreason.“Areyouokay?”heaskedgruffly,hiseyessearchingherface.Ifsomethingwaswrong,he’dfixit.Therewasnothinghewouldn’tdoatthemomenttomakehersmileagain,takeawaytheconfusionandpainhesawreflectedinhereyes.
Aslongasshedoesn’tsayshecan’tmarryme.Ifshesaysitagain…I’llloseit.
Karanoddedhesitantlyandthenshookherhead.“Yes.No.Idon’tknow.”Sheputherforeheadonhisshoulderandstartedtosoblikeherwholeworldwasending.Liftingherhands,sheclenchedathist-shirt,fistinglargeportionsofthecottonathiswaistwhileshesaturatedthetophalfofthegarmentwithhertears.
HolyChrist!Completelybaffled,Simonwrappedhisarmsaroundher,hisgripsotightshesqueaked.
“Can’tbreathe,”shemumbledasshesuckedinalaboredbreath.
“Shit.I’msorry.Kara,Idon’tunderstand.”Simonloosenedhisholdimmediately,keepingherpliantbodyagainsthis,feelingcompletelyhelplessandhatingeverymomentofit.
ShetwistedinhisarmsasaseriesofsharprapssoundedonthewoodframeofthedoorandhisolderbrotherSamstrolled,uninvited,intotheroom.
Usingthedistractiontoheradvantage,KaraslippedfromSimon’sarmsandmadeherescape.“Ihavetogo.Maddieisexpectingmeattheclinic.”Herexplanationwasrushedandbreathless;asshehurriedoutoftheopendoorlikeherasswasonfire,skirtingaroundhisbrotherasshewent.
“No!Kara.Wearen’tfinished.Don’tyoudareleaverightnow,”Simonbellowedloudlyafterherretreatingfigure.Angryandcompletelydesperate,heplowedafterher,determinedtotrackherassdownuntilsheexplainedwhatwasgoingon.
Simonnevermadeitoutthedoor,hisbrotherjerkinghimbackintotheroomwithastronggriponthebackofhisshirt.“Whoa,bro.Lethergo.Itdoesn’tlooklikeyouwereresolvingmuchofanything.”
Simonturnedtofacehisbrother,absolutelylivid.“Takeyourfuckinghandsoffme.She’sgoingtolisten.”
Samlethisbrotherturn,butfirmlygrippedSimon’sshirtinthefront,pullinghisyoungerbrothercloser.Nosetonose,SamdrilledSimonwithanicystare,hisvoiceascoldashiseyesashereplied,“Ohyeah,youbothlookedlikeyouweretotallyreadytohavearationalconversation.”SamshookSimonlightly.“Calmthehelldownandthinkaboutwhatyou’redoing.Thewomanwasdissolvinginapuddleoftears.Youloveher.Isthisreallythemoodyouneedtobeinwhenyoutalk?You’llsaystupidthingsthatyou’llregretlater.Trustme.”
Deflated,Simon’sbodyrelaxed,allowingSamtoloosenhisgrip.“Fuck.Ialreadydid.”Heflinchedasheheardthedoortothecondoslamclosed,hisheartsinkingtohisfeetattherealizationthatKarahadlefttheirhome.Lefthim
SamsteppedbackandgrabbedSimonbytheshoulders,askingquietly,“Yougoodnow?”HisolderbrotherwasreallyaskingifSimonhadagriponhimself
“Yeah.Yeah,Ithinkso.”ShruggingoffSam’slighthold,Simondraggedhimselfbacktohisdesk,slumpingintohiscomputerchair.Buryinghisfaceinhishands,hegroaned.“IreallyneedtotalktoKara.Workthingsout.Something’swrong.”
Saunteringtothecircleofcomputers,Samgrabbedupachair,swingingitaroundandseatinghislargebodyinthechairbackwards.Restinghisforearmsonthebackofthechair,Samlockedhisfingerstogetherandshookhishead,causingthecurlyblondlocksofhishairtorufflelightlyashetoldSimoninagravevoice,“Bro,youreallyneedtoworkonyourcommunicationskills.Ifthatwasworkingthingsout,I’dreallyhatetoseewhathappenswhenyoutwoarehavinganargument.”“You’renotsick.You’repregnant.”
Karacringed,herheadshootinguptogivethevivaciousredheadedphysicianwalkingthroughthedooroftheexamroomanalarmedstare.Herjawdroppedandsheshookherhead.“Howisthatpossible?”
Dr.MadelineReynoldscametoastopinfrontoftheexamtableKarawasseatedonandfoldedherarmsinfrontofher.“You’reanurse.Dowereallyneedarefresheronanatomyandphysiology?”Maddieliftedherarmsandmadeacirclewiththemiddlefingerandthumbofherlefthandwhileinsertingherindexfingerofherrightintothecircle.“PartAisinsertedintopartB,whichmayresultinpregnancy.”Sheshrugged,smilingatKaraasshedroppedherhandstoherside.“Youknowtheotherdetails.”
“I’monthepill,Maddie.It’snotpossible.”
“Youknowitcanstillhappen.AndIthinkit’sentirelypossiblethatyouconceivedsoonafteryouhadthatstomachvirusbetweenChristmasandNewYears,”Maddieanswered,hervoicecontemplative.“Youmissedyourperiodrecently,didn’tyou?”
Karanoddedreluctantly.“ButIstilltookmypilleverydaywhenIwassick.Ididn’tforget.AndIdidn’ttakeanyantibioticsthatwouldinterferewiththeeffectivenessofmypill,”Karaanswered,hervoicepanicked.
Maddiegaveherawrylook.“Butyouwerevomitingeverydayforaweek.Isuspectmostofyourpillcamerightbackupandwasneverdissolvedinyourbloodstream.”
“Shit,shit,shit.”MaddiewasprobablyrightandKarawasexperiencingsomeseriousdenial.Allofthesymptomshadbeenthere.Shejusthadn’twantedtoacknowledgethem.CursingherselffornotthinkingaboutthepossibilitythatMaddiehadjustmentionedandusinganalternativemethodofbirthcontrol,Kara’seyesdroppedtothefloor.
“Youweresick.Don’tblameyourselfbecauseyourbrainwasscrambled.”MaddiehandedKarathepaperinherhand.“Here’stheresultofyourHCG.It’spositive.Youknowthetestisprettydamnaccurate,butwecanrepeatitinaweekifyouwantto.”
KaratookthetestresultsfromMaddie,staringdownatthepositiveresultinshock,hereyesfloodingwithtears.Again.“Ican’tbelieveit.OhGod,howamIgoingtotellSimon?”
Maddieploppedherassonarollingstool,wheelingherselfbetweenKara’sfeet,whichweredanglingfromtheexamtable.SnatchingthetestresultsfromKara’stremblingfingers,MaddiedroppedthesheetofpaperonthetableandgraspedbothofKara’shands,staringupatherwithaconcernedexpression.“YouthinkSimonwillbeupset?Kara…Idon’tthinkhewill.You’regettingmarriedinamonth.It’salittlesoon,butIthinkhe’llbedelighted.AndIknowyouwantkids.”
KaralookeddownatMaddie,herexpressiongrim.“Idowantchildren.I’mthirtyyearsoldandI’dliketohavemorethanone.ButanytimeIbringupthesubjectwithSimon,heshutsitdownimmediately.Hewantstowait.”Shecoveredherflatstomachreflexively,sighingatthethoughtthatshewascarryingSimon’schild.Shewantedthisbabydesperately,alreadylovedit.“Idon’tthinkhe’llbehappy.HisexpressionlookspainedeverytimeItalkaboutit.Andwefoughtthismorning.”
“About?”Maddiepromptedgently.
“Iwasbeingaravingbitch.Ihaven’tbeenmyselfforthelastfewweeks.That’swhyIwantedyoutorunafewbloodtests.IthinkIknewIcouldbepregnant,butdidn’twanttoadmitit.Ifeelsoemotionalallthetime,soscared.IhadapremaritalagreementdrawnupbyanattorneytoprotectSimonandhewouldn’tsign.”
MaddiesqueezedKara’shandslightly.“Youknow,Ilikethatmanmoreandmoreeveryday.Goodforhim.Hetrustsyouenoughtoknowthatyouwouldneverscrewhim.”Maddiesmirked.“Notfinanciallyanyway.AnyotherbillionairewithSimon’smoneywouldhavealreadyhadyoursignatureonaprenupthemomentheputthatgorgeousringonyourfinger.Whywouldyouargueaboutthat?”
“Iinsistedhesign.Herefused.ToldmeIdidn’thaveenoughfaithinhim.ThenItoldhimthatmaybeweshouldreconsiderthismarriagebecausewewerejusttoodifferent.God,Idon’tevenknowwhyIsaidthat.Simonislikeamissingpieceofmysoul,myotherhalf.Idon’tknowwhatI’ddowithouthim.Wefitineverywayexceptforthemoney.IguessIpanicked.”
KarashudderedassherememberedtheshatteredlookofpainonSimon’shandsome,belovedfaceandwantedtostartcryingalloveragain.Whyhadshesaidthat?Simonwasherworld,andsheknewhefeltthesame.Themanhadsufferedenoughpaininhispast.Heshouldn’thavetoreceiveitfromthewomanheloved,thewomanhewantedtomarryandspenttherestofhislifewith.
“You’repregnant,girlfriend,andyourhormonesareragingoutofcontrol.It’snormaltobealittletouchy,doandsayirrationalthings,andtohavemoodswings.TellSimon.Lethimunderstandandbethereforyou.Youneedhimrightnow,”Maddietoldherinapersuasivetone.
Karasmiledatherfriendweakly.“It’shardtobelievethatyouoncehatedhim.”
“IneverhatedSimon.Ididn’tknowhim.Iwasjustafraidhe’dendupbeingasnakelikehisbrother,Sam.”Maddie’svoicewassoft,butitheldatraceofbitterness.“It’sprettyclearthathe’snot.Headoresyou,makesyouhappy.Forthatalone…Ilovetheguy.Buthe’salsoaverygoodperson.He’shelpedmekeepthisfreeclinicafloatwithhisdonations.”
ThemoneythatwasdonatedbelongedtoSamtoo,acharitablegiftfromtheHudsonCorporation,butKarawasn’tabouttomentionthatfacttoMaddie.SamHudsonandMaddiehadapast–andthingsobviouslyhadn’tendedwell.Maddieneverwantedtodiscussit,butKaraknewthatneitheroneofthemwereexactlyoverit,eventhoughKarasurmiseditwasanincidentinthedistantpast.“Sam’sagoodman,Maddie.Hesavedmylife.”
“Yeah.Afterheinsultedyou,”Maddiesnapped,irritated.
“He’snotperfect,buthehasagoodheart,”Karaargued.Samhadbeenanassthefirsttimeshe’dmethim,butoverthelastyear,Simon’sbrotherhadbecomedeartoher,likeabigbrothershehadneverhad.Andhehadsavedherfromtwoderangedcriminals,riskinghisownlifeforhers.She’dforgivenSamalongtimeagoforhisactionsatSimon’sbirthdayparty.He’dbeenaperfectangelsincethatincident.
“He’saman-whore,”Maddiemutteredfiercely.
Okay.Karacouldn’treallyarguethatpoint.ButKarasuspectedSamwentthroughwomenlikeasurgeonwentthroughrubberglovesbecausehe’dnevermettherightwoman.Or,hehadmettherightone…andshehadgottenaway.Samneverdatedawomanworthkeeping;hewentoutwithsuperficialwomenwhoonlycaredabouthisstatusandmoney.Theywereallstunningtolookat,buttherewasneveranygenuinewarmthinasingleoneofthem.ScanningMaddie’sflushedfaceandvolatileexpression,KarahadafeelingthatMaddiewasdefinitelyafactorinSam’sdysfunctionalrelationshipswithwomen.“Somethinghappenedbetweenyoutwo.Areyouevergoingtotellmewhat?”
“No.Itwasalongtimeagoandit’snotimportant.”MaddiereleasedKara’shandsandrosetoherfeet,sendingherstoolbackwardwithapracticedflickofherfoot.“YouneedtostarttakingprenatalvitaminsandseeanOBdoc.”
“I’llmakeanappointmentwithDr.Shapiro.”Kararubbedhertummy,stillincredulousthatshewasactuallycarryingSimon’sbaby.Boyorgirl?Shedidn’treallycareaslongasthebabywashealthy.However…shewouldlovetohavealittleSimon.
Nodoubthe’dbebossyanddemandinglikehisdaddy.Andhandsome,withdarkeyesandravenhair,justlikeSimonKarasmiled,hereyesdreamy,hopinghersonordaughteralsoinheritedSimon’skindness,hisgenerosity,hisfreakingoff-the-chartsIQ.Yeah,anadorablelittlereplicaofSimonwouldbeincredible,andKaraknewSimonwouldbeawonderfulfather.Ifhewantstobeafather.Strangelyenough,sheknewhewouldfallinlovewiththebaby,evenifhewasinitiallyreluctant.He’dspoilthebabyshamelessly,thesamewayhespoiledher.Problemwas,Karadidn’twanttoforceSimonintofatherhoodifhewasn’treadyforit.Notthatshehadmuchofachoicenow.
Maddienoddedherhead.“KatherineShapiroisanexcellentOB.Goodchoice.”SeeingthedistantlookinKara’seyes,Maddiesnappedherfingersinfrontofherface.“Hey,whereareyou?”
Kara’sheadjerkedup,meetingMaddie’seyeswithaguiltylook.“Um…sorry.Iwasjustthinkingaboutthebaby.”AndSimon.AlwaysSimon.
“Areyouokay?Iknowthiswasashock.”Gently,MaddierestedacomfortinghandonKara’sshoulder.“Don’tworryaboutthemoodinessandbeingemotional.It’shormones.TellSimonandlethimhelpyou.He’llunderstandyouremotionalbehavioronceheunderstandsthatit’scausedbyyourhormonesandpregnancy.”
Karagulped,wonderingifhewouldunderstand.DearGod,shelovedhimmorethananythingoranybodyelseonearth.Whatifhedidn’tunderstand?Hoppingofftheexamtable,notreallywantingtothinkaboutSimon’sreaction,Karamuttered,“I’dbettergetbacktowork,”ShewashereintheclinicforherweeklyvolunteershiftandMaddiehadpatientstosee.“Thanksfortakingthetimeouttocheckmeover.IthoughtIwaslosingmymind.”
“You’repregnant.Prettymuchthesamething,”Maddieansweredwithatouchofdryhumor.“Gohome.Thescheduleislightfortherestoftheday.Icanhandleitalone.GoandtalktoSimon.Youbothneedtimetogetusedtothis.”ShepulledKara’sunresistingbodycloseandhuggedherfiercely.“Everythingwillbeokay.Simonlovesyouandyoulovehim.You’regettingmarriedinamonthandyoucan’tcancelthewedding-Ialreadyhavemydress!”
KarahuggedMaddieback,clingingtothepetitewomanforanextramoment.AfterSimon,therewasnobodyshelovedmorethanMaddie.“Thankyou,Maddie,”shewhisperedsoftly,tearswellingupinhereyes.
Oh,Lord,notagain.Howmanytimescouldonewomancryinasingleday?IcancountthenumberoftimesI’vecriedinthelastfiveyearsononehand,mostofthembecauseofsomethingsweetthatSimondidforme.I’mturningintoadamnbrokenfaucetthat’sconstantlydrippingwater.
Emotionally,Karaknewshewasamess,heremotionsswingingradicallyfromoneextremetotheother.Notevenherdamnbodywasherownanymore.ShecravedSimon’shotbodyeverymomentoftheday.Sure,she’dalwaysbeenlikeafemaleinheatwheneverhewasnear,butnow,shewantedtojumphisboneseveryothersecond.Simonwasinsatiable,butKarawasbettingshecouldeasilysurpasshiminthecarnalneeddepartmentrightnow.Andthen,therewashergrowingurgencyforfood,cravingssostrongtheycompelledhertoseekoutthestrangestfoodslikeacrazywoman.Onedayitwasahamburger,thenextdayitwaschocolate.Today,itwasicecream.She’ddojustaboutanythingforalargebowlofthechocolatesundaegourmeticecreaminthefridgeathome.Ormaybeagallonortwo.Herstomachrumbledaloudatthethought.
Maddie’slaughterflowedlightlyovertheroom.“Nomorningsickness,Itakeit?Cravings?”
“Foodandsex.Sexandfood.Whichoneismoreimportant,changesfrequently.I’malittlequeasyinthemorning,butitdoesn’tlastlongandthenI’meatinglikeahorsefortherestoftheday.SometimesIcravethingsthatIdon’tevenlike.HowcouldIhavenotsuspectedthatImightbepregnant?”Karaanswered,annoyedthatherbrainwasn’tincontrolofheractionsanymore.“Ifyou’resureyoudon’tmind,IthinkI’llgohome.IhavetotellSimon,soImightaswellgetitoverwith.”Honestly,shewantedtotellSimonassoonaspossibleandhopeheforgaveherfortreatinghimsopoorlythatmorning.Thelookonhisfaceearlierwasnaggingather,tuggingatherheart.
MaddiesnortedassheturnedKaraaroundandpushedhergentlytowardthedoor.“Youvolunteeryourtimehere,Kara.Everydamnweek,eventhoughyouhaveafull-timejobatthehospital.I’mgratefulforyourhelp,butyoudon’thavetoaskpermissiontoleave.I’llbefine.”Maddiehesitatedbeforeaskingsoftly“Yousaidyouwerescared?DoyoumindifIaskwhy?”
Karashookherheadslightly.Withherhandonthedoorknob,shestopped,andturnedherheadtolookatMaddie.Shedidn’tmindherfriendasking,butshewasn’tquitesureshecouldevenexplain.“Haveyoueverhadsomethinghappentoyou,somethingsogoodthatit’shardtobelievethatit’sevenreal?”
Maddiehesitatedbeforenoddingslightly.“Yeah.Once.”
Karahadafeelingherfriendtrulydidunderstand.“It’slikethatwithSimon.SometimesIneedtopinchmyselftomakesurethatI’mnotdreaming,thathe’sreal,thathelovesme.IguessI’mafraidthatsomethingthisgoodwillsomehowbetakenaway,thatitisn’tforever.”
“Youlostyourparentsattheageofeighteenanddidn’thaveanyotherfamily.Maybeit’sthememoryofthatlossthatmakesallofthissoscary,soterrifyingtofeelthewayyoudo.Everythingseemsamplifiedwhenyou’repregnantandyou’rerunningonemotions,”Maddieansweredthoughtfully.
Kara’seyeswidenedasshethoughtaboutherfriend’sstatement.Hadthedeathofherparentsmadeherafraidofloss?“That’spossible.IguessIjustwantSimontoknowhowmuchIlovehimandthatit’snotabouthiswealth.I’vebeenscaredlately,afraidthathewon’tunderstandthatIlovehimforthemanheisandnothismoney.”
“Theproblemis,healreadyknowsthat.”Maddieletoutanexasperatedsigh.“Heisn’tseeingyourgesturestoprotecthimorproveyourloveforhimasreassurance,Kara.He’sseeingitasrejection,arefusaltoacceptallthatheis.Simonmighthavegrownuppoor,butheandSambustedtheirassestobecomesuccessful.It’samajoraccomplishmentinhislifeandyouwantnopartofit.”Inagentlervoice,Maddiecontinued,“Iunderstandwhatyou’retryingtodoandIgetthatyou’vealwaysbeenindependent,butifyourpositionswerereversedandyouhadmoremoneythanFortKnox,wouldn’tyouwanttoshareitwithSimon,makehislifeeasierafterlivingalifeofpoverty?”MaddiewaiteduntilKaranoddedbeforecontinuing.“Inhisownscrewed-upway,he’stryingtotakecareofyou.Sometimesmenconnecttheirownself-worthwiththeirabilitytotakecareofthewomantheylove.Yeah,it’sold-fashionedandridiculous,buttrue.Believeme;Simonhasneverhadanyquestionaboutyoubeingagold-digger.That’syourhang-up,nothis.”
“Idoaccepthim.Idon’trejectanypartofSimon.IadmirethewayheandSampulledthemselvesupfrompovertyand…”
“ThenforGod’ssake,droptheprenupideaandlettheguybuyyoustuff.Ifitmakeshimhappy,whatdoesitmatterifhespendshismoneytogiveyousomething?Youdeserveitandheknowsyouaren’tafterhimforhismoney.Butyouneedtoacceptthathe’sricherthanGodandanythinghegivesyouwon’tmakeevenatinydentinhisnetworth.”Maddieputherhandsonherhipsasshefinished,givingKaraanadmonishingstare.
“Healreadybuysmethings.MorethingsthanIneed.”
“Yeah.Andyoufighthimoverit.Iunderstandthatyou’velivedwithalmostnothingyourentirelife,soyouthinkyoudon’tneedanything.You’regoingtohavetodealwiththefactthatyou’remarryingoneoftherichestmenintheworld.Ifheweretryingtobuyyourloveorcouldonlyshowhisaffectionthroughmaterialthings,thatwouldbeaproblem.Butthat’snottrueinSimon’scase.He’sjusttryingtobethoughtful,tryingtotakecareofyou.Isay…lethimdoitandenjoythethingshegivesyouwithoutfeelingguilty.Ifyoureallywanthimtobehappy,lethimspendhismoneyonyou.Compromise.You’restilllivinginsurvivalmode,countingeverypennyyouspend.Igetthat.Butyoudon’tneedtodothatanymoreandSimondoesn’tseehisspendingasextravagant.Heseesitasnormalbecausehe’sbecomeaccustomedtobeingwealthy.Understand?”
KarastaredatMaddie,comprehensiondawningslowly.Compromise?Wasn’tthatwhatshehadalwaysthoughtshewasdoing?Butwasshereally?HadsheeverreallytriedtounderstandSimon’ssideofthemoneyissue?Groaninginwardly,Kararealizedthatshestillneverboughtanythingthatwasn’tvitaltohersurvivalandshechastisedSimonwheneverhespentanymoneyonher.ForSimon,hisgiftshadbeennormal,equivalenttohislifestyle.Theymayhaveseemedoverthetoptoherbecauseshehadalwayslivedinpoverty,butshewasstartingtoseehowSimoncouldinterpretherbehaviorasarejection.
“Howdidyoueverbecomesowisewhenitcomestomen?”KaraaskedMaddie,knowingherfriendrarelydatedandhadbeenraisedinseveralfosterhomes.
Maddieshrugged.“It’seasytoseeasanobserver.Hardertorecognizewhenyou’reactuallyemotionallyinvolved.I’vewatchedyouandSimonforayearnow,seenyourreactiononyourbirthday,Christmas,andanyothertimehegivesyousomethingnice.Insteadofacceptinghisgiftswithasmile,youchewhimoutforspendingmoneyonyou.AndI’veseenhisinjuredlooks.Hethinkshe’sgivingyousomethingthatwillpleaseyouanditdoesn’t.Ithinkit’shardonhisego.”
“Oh,God.I’msuchabitch.Ididn’tknow.Ididn’tthinkaboutitthatway.”Tearssprungtohereyes.Ohshit,don’tstartcryingagain.
“Hey,don’tbeatyourselfupoverit.You’reasurvivor.Yourattitudehasgottenyouthroughalotofchallengesinyourlife.There’snoshameinthat.I’mjustsayingthatit’stimetoletgoofthatparticulardefensemechanismandrelaxalittle.LetSimongiveyousomenicestuff,takeanicehoneymoon.Themanhasaprivatejet.Useit.”MaddiescoopedupKara’stestresultsfromtheexamtable.“TrytogosomewhereotherthanDisneyworldthistime.”
KarasmiledatMaddieweakly.DisneyworldonherspringbreakwastheonlyvacationKarahadeverallowedSimontogiveher.“Hey,IwantedtogototheMagicKingdom.I’dneverbeentherebefore.Itwaswonderful.”
“SaveMickeyMouseforafteryouhavethekid.LetSimonfireupthatjetandwhiskyouawaytosomeplaceromantic.There’splentyoftimeforfamilyvacationslater.”
Karagrinned.“London?Paris?Italy?”Theywereallplacesshe’dlovetovisit,butdidn’tthinkshecouldeverafford.
Maddiesmiledbackatherandwinked.“Nowyou’retalking.Thinkbig.Verybig.IhaveasneakingsuspicionthatSimonwouldn’tmindaverylonghoneymoon.”
Karaopenedthedoorandsteppedthroughit,makingherwaytothefrontoftheclinicwithMaddieclosebehind.Scoopingupherjacketfromahooknearthereceptionarea,sheaskedMaddiequietly,“You’regoingtohavetodealwithSamformywedding.Areyouokaywiththat?”
Maddie’sspinestiffenedvisiblyasshereachedforafileonthereceptiondeskinpreparationforhernextpatient.“Ofcourse,He’snothingtome.”
Hmm…Karadoubtedthat.“Ifyouspendsometimetogether,youmightdiscoverthatheisn’tquitetheogrethatyouthinkheis.Maybehe’smaturedsinceyouknewhim.”
Maddieshotheradoubtfullook.“Pleeeze!Idoreadthenewspaperandmagazines.Themanstillhasasetofhornsunderneaththosegoldencurlsofhis.Don’tholdyourbreathonthatassumption.Youmightpassout,anditwouldn’tbegoodforthebaby.”ShefollowedKaraoutthedoorandintothereceptionarea.“Headedforhome?”
Karaslippedherarmsintoherjacketandzippedthefront,amysterioussmileonherface.“Shortly.Ihavesomeshoppingtodofirst.ItisValentine’sDay.Ineedtopicksomethingupandhitafewotherstores.Ihadmyluckypennymadeintoamedallionwithamen’sgoldchainforSimonsohecan’tgiveitback.Thejewelerwasabletodoitwithoutruiningtheintegrityofthecoin.”ThecoincollectorinSimonwouldhaveflinchedhadshemadetherarepennyintoapieceofjewelrythatwoulddestroytherarecoin.“Ineedtopickitupatthejewelrystore.”
“IguessitisValentine’sDay.Iactuallyforgot,”Maddieanswered,herexpressiondistantandslightlysad.
Karasaidhergoodbyesandslippedoutthefrontdoor,sendingasilentValentinewishtoCupidforMaddietofindtheextraordinarymanthatherfrienddeserved.Simonpacedhiscomputerlablikeacagedtiger,knowingthethoughtshewashavingaboutKaraleavinghimwereprobablyirrational,buthewasn’texactlyfeelinglevelheadedatthemoment.He’dfeltbetterafterSamhadleft-hisbrotherhadtalkedsomesenseintohisthickhead-butaftergettingatextfromKaratellinghimthatshewouldbehomelaterthannormal,he’dgottenanxiousalloveragain,expectingtheworse.Hehadn’tbeenreassuredbyherresponsestohistextmessages,whichhadbeenincrediblyvague.Theonlypositivehadbeenthefactthatshehadsenthimamessagetellinghimshelovedhim.
Iloveyousomuch.I’llbehomesoon.
Simonstoppedpacinglongenoughtotracethewordsshehadtypedinhertextmessage,hopingtheywouldlightenhismood,givehimhope.Andmaybetheywouldhave,buthespottedthatdamnpremaritalagreementonhisdeskoutofthecornerofhiseye,makinghimgruntwithirritation.
MaybeIshouldhavejustsigneditifitwouldmakeherhappy.Whatdoesitmatter?Isastupidpieceofpaperreallythatimportant?He’dalwaystakecareofKara,regardlessofwhateveragreementwassigned.
Simonsnatchedupthecontractfromhisdeskandflippedthepages.Grittinghisteeth,hepickedupapenandsignedhisnamewithangrystrokes.Slammingthepenontopofthepapers,hemuttered,“Fine.It’sdone.Theworldisn’tgoingtoendbecauseIsignedthestupidthing.”Hewasneverleavingher,andhe’dmoveheavenandearthtokeepherathisside.Thedamnpaperscouldjustrot,collectingdustinsomequackattorney’soffice,whileSimonlivedhislifewiththewomanheloved.“Ijustwanthertobehappy,”hewhisperedfiercely,hopinghissignaturewouldendhersadness.Kara’sbehaviorthelastfewweekswasmakinghimcrazy.Hiswomanwasusuallysoserene,soupbeatandpositive,eventhoughlifehadthrownheraveryroughdeal.Itwashellseeingherbeautifulfacewithanythinglessthanasmile.Iftheprenupwaswhatsheneededtobringherpeace,he’dsignahundredofthem.Sure,hemightnotlikethefactthatKarahaddoubtsaboutthem,hadthoughtsaboutthemsomedayseparating,buthe’ddowhateverittooktoconvinceherotherwise.Maybeshejustneededmoretime.Karahadgivenhimsomuch,mostimportantlyherunconditionalloveandsupportoverthelastyear.Ifshecouldputupwithhiscranky,irritated,scarredself-mostofthetimewithoutcomplaint-hecouldsignadamnpaperforher.“Ishouldhavedoneitbefore,”hesaidquietly,cursinghimselfforbeingsoargumentativeaboutsomethingsotrivial.HeknewKarawassensitiveabouttheirdifferencesinfinancialpositions.He’dhopedshewouldgetoverit,begintoconsiderthefactthatwhatwashisalsobelongedtoher,butheguessedshejustwasn’tthereyet.
“Shouldhavedonewhat?”Thehusky,femininevoiceflowedoverhimlikefinesilk,liltingsoftlybehindhim.
Simonturned,drinkinginthesightofthewomanheloved,hisheartaccelerating.“Shouldhavesignedthefuckingpaperswhenyouwantedmetosigninsteadoffightingoverit,”hetoldherinahuskyvoice,needingdesperatelytohaveherinhisarms,feelherwarmsoftnessagainsthim.
Stillinhersoftpinkscrubs,hersneaker-cladfeetpaddedsoftlyaroundthedeskandpickedupthepapers,sendingthepenthatSimonhadusedtosignthedocumentsrollingacrossthedesk.“Yousignedthem?”Karasoundedshocked,surprised.
“Yes.I’msorryforwhatIsaid.”AndSimonwassorry.Moresorrythanhecouldconveyinwords,becausehe’dneverbeenverygoodwithfloweryspeechesorfindingtherightwordstosaytoKara.Honestly,mostofthetimehewasobsessedwithhisneedtopossessher,protecther.Tenderemotionsandsweetwordsweren’texactlyhisforte.
Kara’sgazeflewtohisface,scanninghisfeaturesasthoughshewerelookingforsomething.“Why?Ithoughtyoudidn’twantthis.”
“Idon’t.”Heshrugged.“ButIwantyoutobehappy.Iknowthemoneyissuebothersyou.”Hespearedherwithadarklook.“Isignedthemforyou.Butyou’restillnotleavingme.Ever”Andthepaperswouldneverbeusedorimportant.TheywerejustadamnpooruseoftreesasfarasSimonwasconcerned.
Kara’slipsturnedupinasmallsmile.Hereyesneverlefthisasshepickeduptheagreementandtorethepapersintwo.Andthenrippedthemagain.Andagain.“You’reright.I’mnotleavingyou.Notaslongasyouloveme.”
Hisheartracing,hereplied,“ThatwouldbeaslongasI’mstillbreathing.Whyareyoudoingthat?”heasked,watchingherscatterthelittlepiecesofthecontractacrossthedesk.
“BecauseInevershouldhaveletmoneybeanissuebetweenus.I’msosorry,Simon.Soverysorry.”Hervoicecrackedasshemovedquicklyaroundthedesk,throwingherselfintohisarms.
Simonsavoredthecontact,wrappinghisarmsaroundher,closinghiseyeswithrelief.Hekissedhertemple,hercheek,holdingherascloselyashecouldwithoutcrushingher.“Ishouldn’thavesaidwhatIsaid.”
“Ihurtyoubecauseofmyowninsecurities.You’veneverletmoneybeaprobleminourrelationship,andIshouldn’thaveeither.Youwereright.Iwaswrong,”shemurmuredquietlyagainsthischest.
Gently,SimonbroughtKara’sheadtohisshoulder,lettingherrestcomfortablyagainsthim.Whereshebelongs.Whereshe’llalwaysbelong.“Iloveyou.Ijustwantyoutobehappyagain.Youseemsosad.Idon’tlikeit.”
Karapulledback,butonlyfarenoughtolookintohiseyes.“I’mnotsad,Simon.I’memotional.”
“I’dratherseeyoubehappyemotionalthansademotional,”hegrumbled,kissingthetipofhernosegently.
Cuppinghischeeksoftlyinherhand,sheanswered,“You’reanincredibleman,SimonHudson.Alwayssoworriedaboutmyhappiness,mysafety,sowillingtosacrificeforme.Iloveyousomuchitscaresmesometimes.”
Simoncaughtherhandandbroughtittohislips,kissingherpalmgently.“Ineversacrificeanythingforyou.Iloveyou.Andfeelfreetolovemeasmuchasyouwantto.Youwon’thearmecomplaining.”Simoncouldn’thidehisgrin,knowinghewouldnevergettiredofhearinghowmuchshelovedhim,evenifshetoldhimahundredtimesaday.
Karasmiledsoftly.“Ispentmoneytoday.Yourmoney.Um…Imeanourmoney.AndI’vedecidedthatIneedacar.OrmaybeanSUV.Something…uh…withmorespace.AndIwantalonghoneymoon.Canweusethejet?”
“Absolutely.Anyplaceyouwanttogo.”ThankGod.Simon’sgrinbroadenedasheaskedherplayfully,“Wasitpainful?”
Karadidn’tevenneedtoaskwhathemeant.Simonunderstoodher.“Horribly.Istartedoutontheclearanceracks,butIcouldn’tfindanythingIwantedtheresoIhadtomovetotheregular–pricedstuff.”
“Ouch.”God,helovedthiswoman.“Andhowdidthatgo?”
“Okay.MyhandonlyshookatinybitasIranmydebitcard,”sheadmittedwithchagrin.“Ievenwenttogetamanicureandpedicure.I’veneverdonethatbefore.Itfelt…weird…butIwantedtotryit.”
SimonlaughedashehuggedKaracloser,remindedofjusthowfewluxuriesthiswomanhadeverhadinherlife,howfewthingsshehaddonethatmanywomendidonaregularbasisandtookforgranted.“Whatdidyoubuy?”
“Afewthings.Andum…anewwardrobe.Biggerclothes.”Hervoicewashushed,nervous.
“Areyouplanningongainingweight?”Notthathecared.Shecouldwearwhateversizeshewanted,putmoremeatonherbones.Hercurveswouldbelusher,softer.
“Forawhile.Oh…hell!Imightaswelljustsayit.”Shepulledbackandputahandoneachsideofhishead,Kara’spensiveeyesmeetinghisstill-teasinglook.“I’mpregnant.We’regoingtohaveababy.That’sthereasonI’msoemotional.Ifeellikemyhormonesaretakingovermybrain.”
Simon’sjawdroppedandhisfacetookonanastonishedexpressionashelookedatKara,hismouthmoving,butnosoundescaping.Pregnant?Shewasgoingtohavehisbaby?
Emotionsrolledthroughhim,oneaftertheother.
Fear.
Happiness.
Anxiety.
Andahealthydoseoffiercepossessiveness.
“How?Why?”Stupidquestions,buttheypoppedoutofhismouthanyway,hisbrainstilltryingtocatchupwithhisemotions.
Karaburstintotears,largedropsrollingdownhercheeksasherfacecontortedwithremorse.“I’msorry.ItprobablyhappenedwhenIwassick.Ididn’tgetenoughofthepillinmysystembecauseIwasvomiting.Ishouldhavebeenmorecareful.Iknowyoudon’twanttobeafatherrightnow.ButIalreadyloveourbabysomuch.”
Ourbaby.Our.Baby.Hisheartslammingagainsthischest,hepulledhercompletelyagainsthim,rockinghergently.“Shhhh…itwillbeokay.I…I…ohholyshit.I’mgoingtobeafather.”Intensejoyspiraledthroughhim,makinghisheartswelluntilhesworeitwasgoingtoexplode.
“I’msorry,”shewailedagainsthisshoulder.
“Pleasedon’tbesorry,sweetheart.Itisn’tyourfault.Areyoureadytobeamother?”Hetrippedoverthelastword,stillincredulousthatKarawascarryingtheirchild;ababyconceivedwithsomuchlovethathewasreadytoburstwithpride.
“Yes.Iwantitsodesperately.ButIknowyoudon’t.You’veneverwantedtotalkaboutitbeforeexcepttosayyouwantedtowait.”Shesniffedandsnuggledagainsthim.
“Itisn’tthatIdon’twantourchild.Ijustcan’tfuckingstandthethoughtofyoubeinginthatmuchpain,thatsomethingmighthappentoyou.It’sdangerous.Womencandieinchildbirth.”Hell,hecouldn’tstandthethoughtofKarabeinginpainforanyreason.Hehadn’trealizedthathehadactuallycutheroff,unabletocopewiththethoughtofhergoingthroughwhatshewouldhavetosuffertobearhischild.Heshuddered,stillfuckinghatingthosethoughts.
Hisemotionswarredinsidehisbody.HewantedKaratohavehischildwithalongingsopainfulthatitnearlyknockedhimonhisass.However,thethoughtofanythinghappeningtoherwasmakinghimdemented,maniacal.Simonwantedtowrapherinhisprotection,neverletheroutofhissightforamoment.Maybehewouldn’t.Notforaverylongtime.
“It’snotdangerous,Simon.Womendoiteveryday.Mostwomensaythepainissoonforgottenoncetheyhavetheirchildintheirarms.”Hervoicewasbreathless,hopeful.“Youdon’tmind?”
“Imind,butnotinthewaythatyou’reconcernedabout.”Itbotheredhimbecausehecouldn’tstopthinkingaboutKarahurting.Andhewasgoingtotripleherdamnsecurity,whethershelikeditornot.Hiswomanwaspregnant,whichmadeherevenmorevulnerable.“Iwantagirl.”Abeautiful,sweetreplicaofhermother.“Weneedtomove.Buyaplaceoutsideofdowntownwhereshecanhaveayard.Maybeadog.Ohhell,whatevermakesherhappy.Andweneedtobeinagoodareawithgoodschools.She’llbebeautifuljustlikeyou,sonodatinguntilshe’satleastthirty.”Hescowledashethoughtaboutsomebastardlayingahandonhisdaughter.
HisheartliftedasKaralaughed,pullingbacktosmileathim.“Iwantaboy.Asweetlittleboylikehisdaddy.”
“Girl.”
“Boy.”
“Girl,”hegrowled.
Karasighed.“Healthy.I’llbehappyifourbabyisjusthealthyandhappy.Idon’treallycare.Heorshewillbedearlyloved.”
Simonfelthiseyesmoisten,hishappinessalmosttoomuchtobear,eventhoughhewasfuckinglosingitaboutKara’ssafety.“Me,too,baby.I’dlovetohaveeitherone.Ijusthopethebabylookslikeyou.I’llloveourchildsomuchandgivethebabyeverythingIneverhad.”Astable,happychildhood,security,love.“Areyoufeelingokay?Yousaidyouwereemotional.Areyousick?Weshouldseethedoctor.Whatelsedoweneedtodo?Whatdoyouneed?TellmeandI’llgetitforyou.”Hesoundedanxious,desperate.Hisgutclenched,hisprotectiveinstinctsgnawingathisinsides.Karawaspregnant.Simonneededtoresearchtheconditionimmediately,findoutwhatKaraneededtodotostayhealthy.Didn’twomenneedthingswhentheywerepregnant,specialthings?Ohhell,hedidn’tknowadamnthingaboutpregnantwomen,butheneededtochangethatsituationimmediately.HowcouldhesafeguardKarawhenhedidn’thaveacluewhattodotoprotecther?
“Ineedyourhotbodyandsomeicecream,”sheansweredinasultryvoice.“ButfirstIneedashower.”
“Me?Youneedme?Shouldwebedoingthat?”Sexwassafewhenawomanwaspregnant,right?Shit,hereallyhadtolookthatinformationupimmediately.
“Ohyeah.Weshouldbedoingitalot.I’mhornyallthetime.Hormones,”shewhisperedasshegentlytookhisearlobebetweenherteethandnibbled.
Christ.HehadnocontrolwhenitcametoKara.Hiscockthrobbedwiththeneedtoburyhimselfinsideherwelcomingheat.“Weshouldbecareful,”heanswered,hismindalreadyfilledwitheroticthoughts,hiscavemanwantingtotakecontrol.Mywoman.Pregnant.Mybaby.
Mine.Fuckingcompletelymine.
“Ineedsex.Lotsandlotsofsex.Hot,sweaty,crazysex,”Karatoldhimemphatically.“AndIexpectyoutomeetmyneedssinceyouknockedmeup.”
Yeah.Hehad.He’dplantedhisseedinsideherandithadtakenroot.Ananimalistic,malesatisfactionslammedintohim.“Howcrazyexactly?”Simonshifted,hiscockreadytoexplodeinsidehisjeans.“What’ssafe?”
“AnywayIwantyoutofuckme.I’monlyataboutfiveweekspregnantrightnow.Somewomengettired,sickorlosetheirsexdriveduringtheirfirsttrimester,butnotme.Iwanttogetlaidatleastfivetimesaday.”Kararubbedagainsthimsensuallywithasmall,breathymoan.“Don’tbeafraidtomakelovetome.It’ssafe.AndIneedyou.Ineveryway.”
Atthatmoment,SimonwantedtomeetanyneedsKarahad,giveherwhatevershewanted.“I’lltakecareofyou,baby.Always.Andyou’lltellmehowyoufeel?”Ifshejustwantedhimtoholdher,cherishher,beclosetoher,he’ddoitquitehappily.HisinnerbeastmightbesnarlingbecauseofthewayKarawasrubbingagainsthim,butKara’sneedswouldalwayscomefirst.
“RightnowIwantashower.Iwanttoorgasm.AndIwanticecream,”sheansweredinsistently,movingoutofhisarms,walkingtowardthedoor,herhipsswayingsensually.
Shit.Howwashesupposedtonotactlikeapossessivemaniacwhenhewasmarryingthesexiestpregnantwomanontheplanet?“I’mupforthat.”Literally.Hiscockwasashardasgranite.
SimonfollowedinKara’swake,catchinguptoheratthebottomofthestairsandwrappinghisarmsaroundherfrombehind.Handsstrokingherstill-flatbelly,hewhispered,“Iloveyou.AskmeforanythingandI’lldoit.Noquestionsasked,nonegativereplies.”
Sherelaxed,lettingherbodyrestagainsthim.“IthoughtIjustdid.”Laughing,sheentwinedhisfingerswithhers,bothofthemcoveringherstomachprotectively.“Ijust…needyou.Ifeelneedyashell.I’mnotmyselfrightnow.PleasetrynottotakeanythingIdoorsaypersonally.It’snotyou.It’shormonesrightnow.Ithinkthey’reeatingmybrain.”
“Beneedy.Begrouchy.Iwon’teventellyounottocry.”Well…he’dtrynottoanyway.Shit,Simonhopedshedidn’tcryalot.He’dbeawreckbythetimethebabywasborn.“Justdon’taskmenottoworry,orbeprotective,orbeconcernedaboutyourhappinessandsafety.Ican’tdothat,”hegrowled,hisfingersclenchinghers.
“Youwon’tbebossy?”
Simongulped.“No.”Okay…maybenotquitesooften.
“Ordemanding?”
Uh…hecouldmanagetotoneitdown,couldn’the?“Nope”
“Domineering?Controlling?”
Well,crap.Shewashittinghimwhereithurt.“I’lltry,”hetoldhersincerely.
Karaburstoutlaughing,afullbellylaughthathehadn’theardinmorethantwoweeks,adelightedsoundthatmadehisheartsoar.Shelaughedsohardshesnorted.“Igiveyoutwenty-fourhours.ThosetraitsaresodeeplyembeddedinyourDNAthatyou’llnevermakeitmorethanaday.”Shecontinuedtochortleasshewenttowardtheirbedroom,makinghismouthgodryassheliftedherscrubtopoverherhead,revealinganabundanceofsmooth,silkyskin.
Hechuckled,knowingshewasprobablyright.Butitwouldn’tkeephimfromgivingithisbest.“Aweekatleast,”hecalledafterherinanarroganttone.
Herlaughterrangoutlouder,stronger,driftingthroughthehallwayandechoingbacktohim,makinghimgrineverbroader.Damnit.Sheknewhimtoowell.
Shakinghishead,hewalkedtothekitchentogethiswomanhericecream.MaddieReynoldschewedonherthumbnail,alookoftotalconcentrationonherface,assheflippedthepagesofamedicalfileononeofherfive-year-oldpatientsattheclinic.Itwassevenp.m.,waypasttimeforhertogethomeandtrytogetsomerest,butsomethingaboutthecasewasnaggingather.Shehadtobemissingsomething,somethingimportant.Timmywastired,listless,havingoccasionalvomitinganddiarrhea,andithadtobemorethanavirus.Thepoortykehadbeenthatwayforweeks.
Sighing,sheleanedbackinthechairofherofficeintheclinic,grimacingasshebitalittletoohardonherfingernail.She’dneedtoconsultapediatrician,runmoretests.SendingupasilentprayerthatTimmy’smotherwouldshowupathernextappointmentwithherson,Maddieclosedthefile.Thepoorkiddidn’thaveaneasylife,andhismotherwasn’texactlyconsistent.
“Hello,Madeline.”
Ahuskybaritonesoundedfromthedoorwayofheroffice,causinghertoleaptoherfeet,readytopushthealarmbuttononthesideofherdesk.Thefreeclinicwasn’tinagoodneighborhoodandpoorKarahadalreadycomeclosetogettingshothere.
“Ididn’tmeantoscareyou.”
AcoldchillrandownMaddie’sspine,butnotfromfear.Sherecognizedthevoice.Eyesnarrowing,shefocusedonthebodyandfacebehindthatsmooth-as-velvetmasculinetoneandthemanstandingrightinfrontofher.“HowdidyougetbySimon’ssecurity?Andwhatinthehellareyoudoinghere?”
SamHudsonshruggedandsteppedintotheroomasthoughheownedit.Evendressedcasuallyinapairofjeansandaburgundycable-knitsweater,themanoozedpowerandarrogance,carrieditonthosewideshoulderslikeanelegantmantle.“They’remysecuritytoo,Sunshine.TheyworkforHudson.Doyouthinktheywoulddoanythingotherthanletmebythemwithapolitegoodevening?”
Arrogantbastard.Maddie’sheartracedandherpalmsgrewsweaty.Shewipedthemoverherdenim-cladthighs,wishingshehadn’tshoweredandchangedinthetinyshowerinthebackoftheclinicbeforecomingintoheroffice.MaybeitwouldhavebeeneasiertofaceSaminherprofessionalattire,herhairconfinedinaconservativeknot.Tryingtopushaflamingcorkscrewspiralbehindoneear,shestiffenedherspine,tryingtomakeherselfappeartallerthanherfive-foot-threeheight.“Whatdoyouwant,Sam?Thisishardlyyourneighborhood.AndIdon’tthinkyouneedtheservicesofahooker?”Hervoicewashard,brittle.Damnit.Whycouldn’tsheactnonchalant?Somanyyearshadcomeandgonesincethatheart-shatteringeventwithSam.Hewasastrangertohernow.Whycouldn’tshetreathimlikeone?
Movingcloser,heanswereddarkly,“Wouldyoucare,Sunshine?WoulditmattertoyouifIfuckedeverywomaninthecity?”
“Ha!Likeyouhaven’talready?Andstopcallingmebythatridiculouspetname,”Maddieansweredsarcastically,butherheartwasracingandherbreathcaughtasSammovedcloseenoughforhertocatchawhiffofhisenticingscentofmuskandman,aspicyaromathatmadeherslightlydizzy.Hisscenthadn’tchanged,anditwasstillastemptingasithadbeenallthoseyearsago
“Whyareyoustillhere?Mysecurityalertedmethatyouwerehereafterdark.Youshouldbehome.Thisneighborhoodisn’tsafeduringtheday,muchlessatnight,”hegrowledsoftly.
“Simon’ssecurity”Somehow,shecouldn’tassociatethetwomen,eveniftheywerebrothers.Simonwasniceandhadaheartofgoldunderneathhisgruffexterior.Samwasthedevilhimself,SatandisguisedasaGQmodel,withmoremoneyandpowerthananymanhadtherighttohave.EspeciallyamanlikeSamuelHudson.
“Whatifsomethuggotthroughsecurity,foundyouherealoneandvulnerable?”Hemovedcloser,socloseshecouldfeelhiswarmbreathcaressinghertemple.
God,hewassotall,sobroadandmuscular.Samhadworkedconstructionwhenshehadknownhimyearsago,hardphysicallaborthathadgivenhimasculpted,perfectbody.Strangely,ithadn’tchangedonesinglebit.Howinthehelldidamanmaintainthatawesomebodysittingbehindadesk?Backingawayfromhisintimatingpresence,herassbumpedagainstthedesk,leavinghernospacetomoveawayfarther.
“Amancouldtakeadvantageofawomanaloneinanemptyoffice,”hecontinued,hisvoicelow,dangerous.
MaddiepushedagainstSam’schest,tryingtogetfreeofherwedged-inpositionbetweenhimandthedesk.“Move.Backoff,Hudson,beforeI’mforcedtosendyourballsintoyourthroat.”
Hismuscularthighmovedoverhers,immobilizingthepossibilityofkneeinghiminthegroin.“Itaughtyouthatmove,remember.Andnevertellyourattackeryourintensions,Madeline.”
Shecranedherneckandlookedathim,hisemeraldgreeneyeswatchinghercarefully.Justasithadyearsago,hishandsomefacetookherbreathaway.He’dalwaysremindedherofsomeancientblondgod,sodamnperfectthathisbodyandfeaturesshouldbecarvedinmarble.However,atthemoment,hemightbeashardasmarble,buthewasfarfromcold.Heatemanatedfromhisbodyinwaves,hiseyesjustasfieryandmolten.“Gofuckyourself,Hudson.”
Sam’slipsturnedup,twitchingprecariouslylikehewastryingnottogrin.Hishandssplayedoverherback,pullingherbodycompletelyintohisashewhisperedintoherear,“I’dratherfuckyou,Sunshine.Muchmoresatisfying.You’restillthemostbeautifulwomanI’veeverseen.Evenmorebeautifulthanyouwereyearsago.”
Liar.He’ssuchadamnliar.IfIhadbeensodesirablehewouldn’thavedonewhathedid.“Letgoandgetthehelloutofmyoffice.”Thebastardwasplayingher,anditwasintolerable.Shewasn’tbeautifulandshewasnothinglikethetwiggyblondemodelsthathesportedonhisarmandtooktohisbed.
“Kissmefirst.Provetomethatthereisn’tsomethingleftunfinishedbetweenus,”Samanswered,hisdarkgreeneyeslitwithsparksoffire,hisvoicehardanddemanding.
“Theonlythingleftunfinishedisthefactthatyouneverevensaidyouweresorryforwhatyoudid.Youdidn’tgiveadamn.Youdidn’t-”
Maddienevergotachancetofinish.Sam’shot,hardmouthsmotheredherbitterwords,neverasking,onlydemandingherresponse.Hislarge,agilehandsmoveddownherback,graspingherassandliftinghertoasittingpositiononthedesk,makingiteasierforhimtodevourhermouth.
Samneverjustkissed:hebranded,heclaimed.Maddiemoanedintohismouthashistongueenteredandretreated,enteredandretreated,untilshewasbreathless.Surrendering,herarmswoundaroundhisneck,herhandsfistinghissilkenwavylocksofhair,savoringthefallofsoftnessoverherfingertips.
Wrappingherlegsaroundhiships,needingtosomehowfindananchortokeepherfromdriftingawayinatidalwaveoflust,sheallowedhertonguetoduelwithhis,feelinghisarousalagainstherheatedcore.Herhipssurgedagainsthiserectionwitheveryhardthrustofhistongue.
Samgroaned,hishandsdelvingunderhersweatshirt,hisfingertipsstrokingoverthebareskinofherback,makinghershiverwithlonging.
Maddiewasdrowning,lostinaseaofdesireandneed,slowlybeingpulledunderthesurfacebyaforcestrongerthanherwill.
Ihavetostop.ThishastoendbeforeI’mcompletelylost.
Yankingherheadback,hermouthdisconnectedfromSam’s,leavingherpantingforoxygenandcompletelyshaken.Sampulledherheadforwardtorestagainsthisheavingchest.
“Shit.Maddie.Maddie,”hechokedout,onehandspearingintohercurls,strokingherhairreverently.
Oh,God.No.Shecouldn’tbesuckedinbySamHudsonagain.Notinanyway.Sheshovedhardagainsthischest,twistingawayandloweringherlegsuntilherfeethitthefloor.“Getoffme.”
Furybuilttoaraginginfernoinsideher.Howdareheuseher,playwithherbecausehewasboredandshewastheonlyavailablefemaleinthebuilding?SamHudsonwasaplayboy,amanwhotookwomentohisbedanddiscardedthem,findinganotherplaythingsoonafterhewasdonewiththelastone.Didthemanhaveaconscience?Didhecareaboutnoonebuthimself?
Maddiewantedtocurlupintoalittleballtoprotectherself,shamedbythewayshehadrespondedtoSameventhoughhewasacompletedog.Whatkindofapersondidthatmakeher?
Sheshruggedawayfromhim,turningtosprintforthedoor.
“Maddie.Wait.”Sam’svoicewashusky,pleading,demanding.
Hegraspedherarm,swinginghertofacehimbeforeshewasabletogettothedoor.Maddieglaredathim,herfuryandfearbattlingfordominance.“Don’ttouchmeagain.Ever.I’mnotthestupid,na?vewomanyouonceknew.Itrustedyouonce,andIforgavemyselfbecauseIwasyoung.Iwon’tdoitagain.Idon’thavetheexcuseofyouthtoevenjustifybeingthatstupid.”
“Youstillwantme,”Samansweredvehemently,hiseyesrakingoverherbody,settlingonherface.
Lookinghimstraightintheeye,sheansweredangrily,“No,Idon’t.Mybodymightrespondtoagorgeousman,butit’sjustphysiological,asexualreaction.You,”shepokedahandtohischestasshespatout,“meanabsolutelynothingtomeanymore.”
“Youwantmetofuckyouuntilyouscream.Icanstillmakeyoupurr,Kitten,”hetoldherarrogantly,asatisfiedsmirkonhisface.
Sheshrugged,tryingtoforcedownherviolentdesiretoslaptheconceitedlookfromhishandsomeface.“Iwouldn’tknow.You’veneverfuckedme.Andyouneverwill.”
Wrenchingherarmfromhishold,Maddievaultedthroughtheofficedoor,scoopingherjacketfromthehookbythereceptiondeskandboltingthroughthelobbyandoutthefrontdooroftheclinic.Maddiedidn’tlookback.Shecouldn’t.OneofHudson’ssecurityofficersescortedhertohercarandMaddiedroveawaylikeshewasaconvictedcriminalwiththelawonhertail,wantingnothingmorethantogetasfarawayfromSamasshecouldpossiblyget.
Maddiedroveinadaze,twowordsplayingthroughherhazybrainlikeabrokenrecord.
Neveragain.
Neveragain.
SamHudsonwalkedslowlythroughthereceptionareaoftheclinic,lostinhisownthoughts.Whatthehellhadjusthappened?He’dstoppedtoseeifMaddiewasokay,concernedthatshewasstillattheclinicsolate,aquickstoptomakesureallwasokay.Damn.Couldheeverseethewomanandnotwanttopossessher,makeherwanthimasmuchashewantedher.
You’venevergottenoverher.Youprobablyneverwill.She’shauntedyouforyears.Shegotunderyourskinlikeasliverofwoodthat’salwaysalittlebitrawandirritated,neverworkingitswayoutagain.
Steppingoutside,Samclosedtheoutsidedoorbehindhim.Heglancedatoneofhissecurityofficers.“Canyoulockup?”
Themannodded.“Yessir.HopeyourmeetingwithDr.Reynoldswentokay.”
Sambarkedahumorless,self-mockinglaugh.“Yeah.Itwasveryinformative.”Heliftedahandtotheotherguardsashedeparted,makinghiswaytohisvehicle.
Yep.Thatmeetinghadgonereallywell,hethoughtdarklyashesteppedintohisBugattiandstartedtheengine.
Youneverevensaidyouweresorry.
Herwordstormentedhim,wouldprobablyalwaystorturehimnow.“Fuck!”Samslammedhisfistagainstthesteeringwheelinfrustration.Nope.Hehadn’teversaidhewassorry.Thenagain,Maddiehadnevergivenhimthechance.Still,heshouldhavesaidit,foundawaytoapologize.Hehadn’thadachancebackthen,andhehadjustblownhissecondchanceafewminutesago.
WhatwasitaboutMaddiethatmadehimlosehisreason?
You’reactinglikeanassholebecauseshedoesn’treallycareaboutyouanymoreandit’seatingyoualive.Youmightbeabletohaveherbodyifyouseduceher…butneverherheart.Neveragain.
Once,yearsago,Maddiehadlookedathimwitheyesthatsparkledwithadmiration,adoration.Onestupidaction,oneidioticincident,andhehadwashedthatlookfromherbeautifuleyesforever.
Leaninghisforeheadagainstthesteeringwheel,heclosedhiseyes,stillabletopicturetheMaddiewhohadlookedathimwithrespectandaffectionevenwhenhehadn’thadtwopenniestorubtogether.Itwasironic:nowthathewasoneofthewealthiestmenintheworld,thatsheeyedhimlikeabugthatneededtobesquashed,arodentthatneededtobeexterminated.
You’llseeheragain.She’llbeforcedtotalktoyouforSimonandKara’swedding.Theweddingwasbeingheldinhishome,soMaddiewouldn’thaveachoice.Hewasthebestmanandshewasthemaidofhonor.Maddiewouldhavetoatleastbecivil,andSamknewshewould.Shewasconsiderateandloyaltoanyonesheconsideredafriend.HerownfeelingswouldtakeabackseattomakingsureKarahadahappywedding,onewithnohasslesorugliness.
AndnomatterhowMaddietreatsme,nomatterhowshelooksatme,Iwon’tbeadicktoher.
Samsatbackinhisseatwithaheavysighandputhiscaringear,wonderingifthatwereevenpossibleanymore.Truthwas,theyearshadchangedhim,madehimintoamanthathewasn’tatallcertainhelikedanymore.
Findawoman,someonetotakeyourmindoffMaddie.
Snappinghisseatbeltonashebackedoutoftheparkingspace,Samtookadeepbreathandranthroughamentallistofwillingfemales…untilhecaughtatantalizingsmell,anelusivescentthatclungtenaciouslytohissweater.Herfragrance.Areminderofwhathadjustoccurredinheroffice.
“Fuck!Ican’tdoit.Ican’tbewithanotherwoman.Notnow,”hewhisperedtohimself,pissedoffthathehadkissedher,feltherlushcurvesagainsthisbody.Now,thinkingaboutspendingthenightinthebedofanyotherwomanbutMaddielefthimcold.
Sambrakedhisvehicleattheexitoftheparkinglot,glancingquicklyathiswatch,grinningasheturnedleftinsteadofright,headedtowardSimon’scondo.
Itwastime.
Simonhadcalledhimearlier,informingSamthathewasgoingtobeanuncle,andaskingforafavor,whichwasacompleterarityforSimon.Honestly,therewasnothingSamwouldn’tdoforhislittlebrother.HehadfailedtoprotectSimononce,anditwasn’thappeningeveragain.WhateverSimonneeded,he’dbethereforhim.
ThankGodSimonhadfoundKara.Samadoredhisbrother’sfiancée,wantingtokissthegroundshewalkedonbecauseshelovedhislittlebrotherunconditionally,madeSimonhappierthanSamhadeverseenhim.AndSimondeservedthathappiness,thatkindofdevotionfromawoman.Unfortunately,watchingSimonandKaratogethermadeSamrealizejusthowemptyhisownlifewas,howdesolateandsuperficialhisexistencehadbecome.
KissingMaddie,holdingheragainafterallthoseyears,hadmadethingsevenworse.Itwaslikesomethingwasawakeningdeepinsidehim,asensationthatwasfamiliar,yetnot.Certainly,itwasn’tcomfortable.
Forgether.ForgetwhatitfeltliketoloseyourselfinMaddie’ssoftness,herscent,thefeelofherlushcurvesanddeliciouslyeagermouth.
Samcursed,knowinghe’dbesleepingalonetonight,takinghimselfinhandashefantasizedaboutMaddie.Andthistime,thosememorieswouldbemuchmorevivid,newer,morerealthaneverbefore.
Fuck!Hewassocompletelyscrewed…anddefinitelynotinagoodway.“Yes!”
Karapunchedherfistintheair,ecstaticthatshehadfinallyconqueredthefirstlevelofSimon’snewgame.Actually,hernewgame,thecomputergameSimonhaddesignedespeciallyforher,namedafterher.TheAdventuresOfKarawasawesome,notthatshewassurprised.Herfiancéwasafreakinggenius,andeverygamethathedesignedwasunique.ItwasnowonderthatshewascompletelyaddictedtoanythingSimoncreated.
Runningahandoverthecomputerscreen,shesighed.Whatmanwouldspendcountlesshoursonagamedesignedespeciallyforher,agamethatheneverintendedtorevealtotheworld?
OnlySimon.
Karaswungthecomputerchairslightly,glancingattheclock.Oops.Shehadspentmoretimethanshehadintendedinthecomputerlabonceshehadgotteninvolvedinthegame.Butitwassoincredible,sodamnaddictive.
ThenewcomputergamehadbeenaValentinegiftfromSimon,oneofmany,apresentthatshewouldalwayscherishbecauseSimonhaddonethishimself,probablyspentweeksofhisnearlynonexistentsparetimedesigningitjusttoamuseher.Simonhadledheruphereoveranhouragotosurpriseher.Hehadleft,grinningbroadly,whenshehadsatdowninthecomputerchair,unabletowaitbeforetryingtomasteroneofhiscreations.
Karashutthecomputerdowneagerly,readytofindSimonandthankhimproperly.Thediamondonherlefthandcaughttheabundantlightintheroom,glitteringbrightly,makingherheartcontractpainfully.
Simon’smine.We’regoingtobemarried.Haveachildtogether.
Hersadnessandhesitationhaddissolvedliketheyhadneverexisted.KarafeltlikeherselfagainwithSimon.Sherealizedthatherirrationalfearshadtodowiththefactthatshehadsuspectedshewaspregnantandhadn’twantedtoacknowledgeit,afraidofSimon’sreactiontothenews.Sheshouldhaveknownbetter.Really,whenhadthemanshelovedeverdisappointedher?Ifanything,hewaswaymoreprotectivethanheneededtobe.ButthatwasSimon,andKaralovedeverythingabouthim,evenwhenhishigh-handeddominancepissedheroff.
Karasmirked,thinkingabouthispromisetotrynottobesodomineeringandcontrolling.He’dbeengoodallafternoonandevening,takingcareofher,makinglovetohergently,asthoughshewouldbreakbecauseshewaspregnant.Theintimacyandtendernesshadbeencomforting,somethingshehadneededaftertheturbulentemotionsshehadexperiencedthelastfewweeks.However…shewasabouttotweakheralpha.Simon’ssexualdominancewassomethingshenotonlyenjoyed,butreveledin.Hewasonehalftendernessandtheotherhalfcompletetestosterone.Itwastimeforhercavemantocomeoutandplay.
Shestood,pullingtheredsilkrobeshewaswearingtighteraroundherbody.Itwasstrangethatshehadn’tseenSimoninoveranhour.Usually,hewouldsitwithher,workononeofhisgameswhilesheplayedontheusagecomputerinthelab.
Herbarefeetdidn’tmakeasoundontheplushcarpetasshepaddeddownthestairs,herfreshlypaintedtoenailspeekingoutfromundertherobeasshewent.Lookingdownatherfeetasshetookthelaststep,shedecidedthatmaybeshewouldgoforapedicureagaininthefuture.Herfeetweresmoothandithadbeenreallyrelaxing.MaybesheandMaddiecouldgorightbeforeherwedding.
Herwedding.Simonwasgoingtobeherhusband.KaraHudsonwasanameshe’dalwayscarryproudly,knowingthesacrificethatbothbrothershadmadetoachievetheirstatus.
“Simon?”Karacalledtohimassheenteredthekitchen,perplexedwhenshedidn’tfindhimthere.Surelyhewasn’tasleep.Heneverwenttobedwithouther.
“Inthebedroom,comehere,”Simoncalledhoarsely,demandingly.
Asmallsmileformedonherlipsasshemovedtowardtheirbedroom.Simonrarelyasked;heinstructed.Karacompliedwhenshewantedto,andrightnowshefeltcompelledtofollowhisinstructions.Curious,shewandereddownthehallway.Thedoortothebedroomwaspartiallyclosed,swingingopensoundlesslyassheplacedherpalmonthewoodandpushedgently.
ShegaspedashereyeslandedonSimon,cladinnothingbutherluckypennyonagoldchainandapairofsilkValentineboxershortsdecoratedwithheartsanddevils,completelyboundtothebed.Heartracing,sherushedtothebed.“Simon,whatareyoudoing?”
Karahadbeenintherestraintsherselfseveraltimes,oncebecauseitwastheonlywaythatSimoncouldhavesex,andlaterjustbecauseitwaseroticandsexy.ConsideringSimon’shistory,shecouldn’tbelievewhatshewasseeing.Sheblinked,andblinkedagain.
Bothofhishandswererestrained,butheopenedoneofhisfists,revealingoneoftheheart-wishesshegavehimeveryholiday,atinypaperheart,goodforonewish,onethingthathewantedfromher.Thetinypaperflutteredinhishand.“IwishyouwouldbelievethatItrustyoucompletely.”
“No,Simon.No.”Karaclimbedontothebed,tearingattherestraintsinafrenzyoffearandpanic,butthebindingsheldfast.Frustrated,realizingthatshewasn’tcompletelysurehowtogetthemloose,shebeggedhim,“Tellmehowtoreleasethese.”Desperate,shejerkedhardononeofthearmrestraints,needingtofreehim,notabletoseehimhelpless.Thishadtobekillinghim.Damnhim.Wastherenothinghewouldn’tsufferjusttoprovehimselftoher?“Youdidn’tneedtodothis.Idotrustyoucompletely.”
“Kara,stop.Now.Beforeyouhurtyourself”Hisvoicewasstern,rigidinawaythatshehadneverheardfromhimbefore.Anditstoppedherinhertracks.Inamorerelaxedtoneheadded,“I’mnotuncomfortable.Well…exceptforsomeminorswelling.”
KaraslappedahandoverherracingheartandlookedatSimon’sfaceforthefirsttimesinceshehadenteredtheroom.Hewas…smiling.Acompleteshit-eatinggrinthatmadeherrelaxslightlyandexaminethesituation.Holyhotness,themanwassexyassin.Allfourofhislimbswereboundandtherewasnothingonthebedexcepthisbodyandtheblacksilkfittedsheetbeneathhim.Theblackboxerswerenew,oneofhermanyValentinegiftstohimthisyear,andtheymoldedoverhiserectionperfectly.
Hiserection?Simonwasactuallyaroused?Howwasthatpossible?Withhishistory,thethingsthathadhappenedtohim,howcouldhedothiswithoutemotionalpainanddistress?SearchingSimon’sfaceforanysignofdiscomfort,shefound…none.Hiseyeswerehot,devouringher,withoutatraceofunease.
“Howdidyoudothis?Howisitpossibletoputyourselfintothesethings?”Allfourofhislimbswereboundsnugly,judgingbythelackofgivewhenshehadbeenyankingonthem.
“Sam,”Simonansweredinadisgruntledvoice.“Ithinkthebastardenjoyedmakingthemastightaspossible.”
Slappingahandoverhermouth,Karatriedtostopadelightedgigglefromescapingherlips…andfailed.“Yourbrotherdidthis?”
“I’msureI’llneverheartheendofit.Iwantedtobenaked,butheinsistedthatIcovermyfamilyjewelssohewouldn’tgoblind,”Simonanswered,unhappy.
OhGod,Karawouldhavegivenanythingtoseethateventwhileitwastakingplace.ShecouldonlyimagineSamtyinghisbrothertoabed,insistingthathecoverhisprivates.Samdidn’tknowallofSimon’ssecrets,sohehadprobablyjustconsideredthesituationodd,somethinghecouldteasehislittlebrotherabouteternally,ratherthanfindingitalarming.“Ican’tbelieveyoudidthis.”Shepluckedtheheartfromhispalmandtoreitup,throwingthetinypiecesoverhershoulder.“Wishgranted.ButIalreadytrustyoucompletely,Simon.Itoldyouitwashormones.AndI’vedonesomethinking.Irealizenowhowmyactionscouldhaveseemedlikerejectionordoubttoyou,butitwasmyissue,notyours.”
“Iwantedtomakesureyoutrustedme.NowtouchmebeforeIgoinsane,”heinsisted,hisdarkeyesdemanding.
Karalookedathim,herbreathcatchingasshedrankinthesightofhim,completelylaidoutforherpleasure.Simonwaslikealeashedtigerreadytopounce.Havinghimboundwasheady,erotic.Hewasallripplingmuscleanddarkpleasure.Andshewasdyingtotouchhim,andstrokethatgoldenskin.“Youarethesexiestmanontheplanet.”Hervoicewashusky,achingwithdesire.
“Ithinkyouneedyoureyesexamined.I’vealwaysthoughtso.Ihavescars,sweetheart.Uglyscars.”
Yes.Simonhadscars,atestamentofhisstrengthandcourage.Karawouldneverfindthemunappealingorugly.“Likeadarkwarrior,theheroofmydreams.”
Shereachedoutandranherpalmdownhischest,tracingeachscarwithherfingerandbendingtolavethemwithhertongue.
“You’recrazy,”hegroaned,strainingagainstthearmrestraints.
“Youmakemethatway,”sheretortedwithalaugh,continuingtotonguehischest,nibblinglightlyatonenipple,cuppinghissilk-cladcockwithherotherhand.
HavingSimonathermercywasnovel,andcompletelyenticing.Comingtoherknees,sheshruggedoutofherrobe,nearlyforgettingherhiddengifttoSimoninhereagernesstotouchhim.
“Holyshit.Whatareyouwearing?”Simon’svoicewastortured,andshesmiledathim,anaughty,seductivesmile.
“AnotherValentinegiftforyou”ItwastheraciestitemshehadeverwornforSimon,andthatwassayingsomething,becausehelovedsexylingerie.Simonusuallyappreciateditbrieflybeforehetoreitfromherbody.Theredbabydolldresswasnothingbutwispsoffabricwithspaghettistraps.Thetopbarelycoveredhernipplesandthetinystripsoffabricsurroundingherbellyweretransparent.Thepantieswerebarely-there,leavingherassexposedandherpussyonlypartiallycovered.“Ofcourse,Ihadtoshave.Completely.Thesepantiesdon’tcovermuch.”
Simongulped,hiseyeshotandwildastheyrakedherbodypossessively.“Completely…bare?”Hechokedoutthelastword,hisvoicehoarse.“Youweren’tearlier.”
Tossingtherobeonthefloor,sheturnedtohim,runningafingerovertheoutlineofhisengorgedcock.“IhadtodoitwhenIputiton.Rightbeforeyoutookmeupstairstoplaymynewgame.It’swonderful,Simon.Ithinkyoushouldreleaseit.”
“ForChristsake,releaseit.I’mreadytoexplode,”hegrumbled,hisbreathbecomingheavy.
“Iwasn’ttalkingaboutyourcock,silly.Iwasreferringtothegame.”Shechuckledassheliberatedhim,watchinghislengthspringfreeassheloweredtheelasticoftheboxers.
“Don’tgiveashitaboutthegamerightnow,”hehuffed.
ThecomputergameleftKara’smindcompletelyasshetouchedhim.Herhandwrappedaroundhissilkenmemberasshebenttokisshim,rubbinghersensitivebreastsagainsthischest.Histonguethrustintohermouthashishipsliftedinresponsetoherfirmgriponhisrod.Simonkissedherlikeamanpossessedandsheansweredhimwithanequalpassion,whileherhandcaressedthepartofhimthatshewasdyingtohaveinsideher.Butthatcouldwait.Simonhaddonethisforherandshewasdeterminedtomakeitpleasurableforhim.Extremelypleasurable.Shemeanttoprodhercavemanbeforeshegaveintoherownurges.
Releasinghismouth,shekneltbesidehim,stillstrokinghisvelvetcock,takinghertimetorunherhandsovereveryinchofhisbody.Shemightnevergetthisopportunityagainandshewantedtotouch.“I’mhavingacraving,”shetoldhiminasultryvoiceasshereleasedhimandslidfromthebed.
“Kara.Getbackhere.”Hisvoicewasbothpleadingandinsistent.
Karadashedtothekitchen,returningwithacanofwhippedcream.Shakingitsensually,shetippedherheadbackandopenedherlips,squirtingastreamofsweetcreamintohermouth.“Mmmm…delicious,”Shelickedherlips,swallowingthefrothyconfection.Simon’sdark,dangerouslookashewatchedher,mesmerized,nearlybrokeher.“There’sonlyonethingthatwouldtastebetterexplodingintomymouthrightnow.SomethingIcrave.”Shecrawledacrossthebed,betweenSimon’sboundlegs.
“Kara.”Hisvoicewasawarning,onethatshedidn’theed.
Shedabbedthewhitefluffontohisrippedabdomen,histhighs,andfinallyalloverhisbulgingcock.
Shelappedathisabdomenfirst,enjoyingthesweettasteofwhippedcream,tracingeveryhard,vigorouslycontractingmuscle.
Simonjerkedonhisrestraints,groaning,“Kara.I’llmakeyoupayforthis.”
Shesmiledasshelickedhisthigh.“I’mcountingonit,bigguy.AndIdomean…big.”Hiscockwasstraining,pulsating.
Movingtohisotherthigh,shenibbledandsucked,leavingasmallmarkwithherteethasshedevouredthesweettreat.
Herpussycontractedasshemovedtohisgroin.Thepantiesofheroutrageouslingeriewerealreadysaturated.
Shepurredsoftlyashertonguesnakedoverhisgroin,lickingawaythewhippedcreamsoftly,thoroughly.
“Fuck.Iwon’tlast.Goddamnit,Kara.Freeme.”Simon’svoicewasfrustrated,andcompletelyaroused.
Shelookedupathim,methisliquidbrowneyesfilledwithdesire,searchingforanysignthathewasuncomfortableinanyotherwaybutpassionately.Hewasn’t.Hewascompletelyconsumedwitheroticpleasure,watchingher,hisonlyfrustrationthefactthathewasn’tpleasuringherinreturn.“Ithoughtyouwantedtosatisfyallmycravings,”shewhisperedtohimsoftly.“Icravetastingyou.”
Simongrowled,hisheaddroppingbackontothepillowasKaratookhiscockintohermouth,hertonguecirclingthebulboushead.
“You’regoingtokillme,”hepantedheavilyashermouthconsumedhimcompletely.
Onlywithpleasure,bigguy.
Shetookasmuchofhissubstantiallengthasshepossiblycould,tighteningherlipsaroundhim,suckinghard,herheadbobbingasshedevouredhim.
Hishipsrose,thrustinghimselfintohermouthasshecamedownforeverystroke.Glancingup,shecouldseehismusclesstraining,hisfistsclenchingtherestraints.Inthatmoment,Simonlookedbeautifulinhispassion,hiscompletelossofcontrol,hisfaceharshwithecstasy.
“Fuck.Kara.Sweetheart.Ahhhh…God.Yessss.”
Heshoutedincoherentwordscontinuouslyasshemovedfaster,harder.Heexploded,hisbodyglisteningwithsweat,hishotreleaseflowingintohermouthsosatisfyingthatshemoanedaroundhiscockassheswallowed.Afterlickingeverydrop,shecrawleduphisbodyandkissedhim,lettinghimtastehimselfandahintofsweetcreaminherembrace
Hetastedhermouth,finallyrippinghislipsfromhers.“Barepussy.Now.”Hestrainedathisbindings,lookingdesperatetobereleased.
Yep.Itwastimetoreleasehercaveman.“Helpme.”Shehadnocluehowtogethimfree.
Simongaveherclippedinstructionsandshefinallygothishandsfree.Hesatupanddeftlyremovedtherestraintsonhislegshimself.
Hewasonherinaheartbeat,hissweaty,still-pantingselfcompletelyoutofcontrol.God,howshelovedhim.AlphaSimonwasontheprowlandsexyashell.
Herippedherlingerie,shreddingthetopandbottominafewhardtugs,completelydestroyingtheensemble.Shesighed,admiringhisbrutestrength,theeasewithwhichhecouldgethernaked.Thedesiretochastisehimforshreddingherlingeriehadleftherlongago.Hewouldreplaceitlater.Andseeinghimgocompletelyinsanewithpassionwaswellworthit.Asusual,hewasroughonthegarmentwithouthurtingher.
“God,you’resofuckingbeautiful,”hebreathedheavilyasheuncoveredhershavenpussy.“Timeforrevenge.Youwanttoplay,littlegirl,youhavetopayup.”
KarawasmorethanreadyforSimon’stypeofpunishment,thetypethatwouldleaveherbreathless,beggingandmoaning.Ashisfingerstracedherswollen,sensitivenipples,shemoaned.Shewasso,soready.
“Please,Simon.”
“Please,what?Whatdoyouwant?”heaskedherharshly.
“Fuckme.Please.”
“Ithinknot.I’mhavingacravingofmyown.Mymouthiswateringforsomecream.Areyouwetforme,sweetheart?”
Wet?Hell…shewasbeyondwet.“Yes.”
Shebuckedherhips,butshecouldn’tbudgehisrocksolidbody.Hismoistskinplasteredagainsther,buthewaskeepingmostofhisweightfromherwithhisarms.Lookingup,shemethiswild,intensedarkeyes,herbodyclamoringforhispossession.“You’regoingtocomeformewhileItasteyou.”Hisvoicewasraspy,andheburiedhisfaceinherhair,bitinggentlyatherneck,beforehelickedhiswaydowntoherbreasts.
Shegaspedashetonguedherbreasts,movingfromonetotheother,asthoughhehadallthetimeintheworldtoworshipeachsensitivenipple.Hercoreclenchedashemovedtoherbelly,stoppingtoflickhistongueintoherbellybutton,layingmoist,hotkissestoherstomach.
Finally,rightbeforeshewasreadytoscreamwithfrustration,hespreadherthighs.Sheshiveredasheblewawarmbreathonhernakedpussy.
“Icanalreadysmellyourarousal,seehowwetyouare,”hegrowled,hisfingerstrailingoverthebareflesh.
Shethrashedherhead,needingdesperatelytofeelhismouthonher.“Please,Simon.Ineedyou.”
Hisfingerdelvedalonghersaturatedfolds,slowlymeanderingdeeper.“Likethis?”heasked,histonedemanding
“More,”shebegged,readytolosehermindifhedidn’tmakehercomeimmediately.
“Likethis?”Hecircledherclit,hisfingerglidingthroughherslickflesh.
“More.Damnit.More.”Shewaslosingit,herbodybeggingforhim.
“Likethis?”Hismouthclosedoverhertenderflesh,histonguelapping,lickingherarousal,consumingher.
Oh,God.Yes.Yes.Yes.Herhipslifted,tryingtogethistonguedeeper,faster.Hepartedherfoldswithhisthumbsandburiedhisfaceinherpussywithatorturedreverberatingsound,devouringherlikeastarvingman,relentlesslyflickingherclitashecompletelyconsumedher.
“Yes.Please,Simon.Ineedtocome.”Shegraspedhishead,threadingherfingersintohishair,moaningasshepulledhimagainsther,rockingherhipsashepleasuredherwithhisscorchinghotmouth.
Hegroanedagainstherflesh,thevibrationspushingherslowlytowardinsanity.Herclimaxengulfedher,consumedher,herbodycatchingfireasSimonlavedherovertheedge.
Nearlyreadytosobwithrelief,Karacriedhisnameaswaveafterwaveofpleasurecrashedoverherbody.
Afterhehadwrungeveryounceofpleasurefromherthathecouldwithhisamazingmouth,Simonshedhisboxersandcrawledupherbody.Karaopenedhereyes,andsawthemansheloved,rawandedgy,justthewayshelikedhim.Justthewayshelovedhim.
Kara’sbodywassated,butherneedtohavehimjoinwithherwasalmostunbearable.“Fuckme,Simon.Now.”Hiserectionjuttedagainstthestill-quiveringfleshofhercore.
“Mine,”hetoldherroughly.“You’llalwaysbemine.”
“Yes.Always.”
SimonpositionedhishardcockattheentrancetoKara’sbeggingchannel,enteringherwithonehardthrust,takingherbreathaway.Hefilledher,completedher.Shewrappedherlegsaroundhiswaistandherarmsaroundhisneck,wantingtobeasclosetohimasshecouldget.
Simon’smouthcoveredhers,suffusingherentirebodywithheat,takingherawaytoaplacewhereonlysheandSimonexisted.Hiscockpummeledher,Simonpullingalmostcompletelyoutbeforeenteringheragain,andKaraembracedthevolatilemating.Hewasclaimingher,andshewantedtobeclaimedbyhim.
Yankinghismouthfromhers,hepanted,“Tellmeyou’remine.Ineedyou.Iloveyou.You’reneverfuckingleavingme.”
“I’llalwaysbeyours,Simon.Nothingwilltearusapart.Iloveyou.”Hergaspingadmissionwasbarelyoutofhermouthbeforeshefeltherorgasmbuilding.WrappingherlegstighteraroundSimon’swaist,shemethispowerfulstrokes,theirsweat-soakedbodiesmeldingtogetherseamlessly.
Karaflewapart,herbodytremblingandherchannelcontracting,nailsbitingintotheskinofSimon’sback.Shecriedouthisname,rockingherfierybodyintohis,milkinghiscockasherorgasmcrestedandthenlethercomebacktoearthslowly.
“Fuck.Kara.Kara.”Simoncame,hisexplosiveorgasmfloodingherwomb.
Herolledoffherimmediately,clutchingheragainsthim,pullingherintotheprotectiveshelterofhisarms.
Hischeststillheaving,hechokedout,“DidIhurtyou?”
Sheshookherhead,herbodystillquivering.“No,”shewhispered,stillshortofbreath.“YougavemeexactlywhatIneeded.”
Herneedsatiated,Karakissedhisforeheadbeforeburyingherfaceinhisneck,stilltryingtorecover.
Somehow,Simonalwaysseemedtoknowwhatsheneeded.Tonight,ontheirsecondValentine’sDaytogether,hehadgivenherhisunbridledpassionandhisdeepunconditionallove.Certainly,hehadn’tneededtoputhimselfinrestraintstoproveanythingtoher.Butjustthefactthathehadbeenwilling,hadputhimselfcompletelyathermercy,humbledherbeyondbelief.
Karasighed,wonderinghowshehadeverbeensolucky,howshehadeverstumbledacrossamanlikeSimon,amantowhomshecouldsurrendereverything,amanwhowouldalwaysholdherlove,hertrustandhersoulsafelyinhiscare
“Iloveyou.HappyValentine’sDay,”shebreathedsoftlyagainsthisneck.
“HappyValentine’sDay,sweetheart.I’llloveyouforever,”Simonmurmuredagainsthershoulder,hisarmstighteningprotectively,possessivelyaroundher.
WhateverchallengessheandSimonmightface,theywoulddealwiththemtogether.
“You’llalwayshaveme,”shetoldhimsoftly,sleepily.
“Iknow,baby.I’mtheluckiestbastardintheworld,”herumbled.
Karafellasleepwithasmileonherlips,andthecontentmentofknowingthatshehadfoundalovethatwouldlastforever.Forawomanwhohadoncebeensoaloneintheworld,itwasthebestValentine’sgiftshecouldeverreceive.Maddieturnedthepageofthebookonherlap,wonderingwhyshejustdidn’tgiveupandgotobed.Itwasn’tlikeshewasreallyabsorbinganyofthewrittenwords.
“Damnit,”shewhispered,slammingthebookclosedanddroppingitonthetablebesidethesofa.Honestly,shedidn’twanttogotobed.Ifshedid,shewouldjustkeeprememberingherencounterwithSam,torturingherselfwithmemoriesofthatscorchinghotkissearlierintheevening.
Swipingtheremotecontrolfromthetable,shepushedthebuttontoactivatethetelevision,hopingshecoulddrownoutherthoughtswiththeteno’clocknews.
Herdoorbellrangjustasthenewsanchorstartingrecountingthetopstoriesoftheday.
Whothehellcoulditbe?Shehadnorealfamilytospeakofandnoneofherfriendswouldcometoherdooratthistimeofnightunlessitwasanemergency.Shesprangtoherfeetandsprintedtothedoor,herheartracing.Lookingthroughthepeephole,shesawamaninuniform,aHudsonsecurityuniform.
“Whoisitandwhatdoyouwant?”shecalledloudlythroughthedoor.
“SpecialValentine’sDaydeliveryforDr.Reynolds,”themancalledback
“Leaveitandgo.”Therewasnowayshewasopeningherdoor,eveniftheguywasapparentlyfromHudson.
“Iunderstand,ma’am.I’lljustleaveithereonthedoorstep.”Theuniformedmanbentoverbriefly,thenstraightenedagainandleft.
Maddieopenedthedooracrack,leavingthesecuritychaininplace.Shewatchedthemangetintohistruckanddriveaway.Closingthedoor,sheliftedthechainandopenedthedoor,hereyeswidening.
Onherdoorstepwasthemostincrediblebouquetofredrosesshehadeverseen.Therewereseveraldozen,toomanyforhertocountinherstunnedcondition.Liftingtheheavy,sturdyvasethatappearedtobecrystal,Maddieluggedtherosestoherdiningroomtable.Placingtheminthemiddleofthecircularoaksurface,shepluckedthecardfromthemiddleofthearrangement.
Shesat,hershakykneesbarelyabletosupportherlegs.Thecardwassmall,theoutsideofthetinyenvelopedecoratedwithheartsandacutelittleCupidinthecorner.Theonlythingonthefrontwashername.Sheopeneditwithtremblingfingers,yankingthecardboardnotecardfromitssurroundingpaper.There,inhandwritingshestillrecognized,wereonlytwowords.
I’mSorry.
Therewasnosignature,nootheridentifyingmarkings.
Droppingboththeenvelopeandcardonthetable,Maddieburiedherfaceinherhandsandwept.
~*~TheEnd~*~Pleasecontinuereadingforanexcerptof
MaddieAndSam’sbook,
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BooksbyJ.S.Scott:
TheBillionaire’sObsessionSeries:

TheBillionaire’sObsession

HeartOfTheBillionaire

TheBillionaire’sSalvation

TheBillionaire’sGame

BillionaireUndone

BillionaireUnmasked

BillionaireUntamed

BillionaireUnbound
TheSinclairs:

TheBillionaire’sChristmas
NoOrdinaryBillionaire

TheForbiddenBillionaire
TheVampireCoalitionSeries:

TheVampireCoalition:TheCompleteCollection
Ethan’sMate
Rory’sMate
Nathan’sMate
Liam’sMate
Daric’sMate
TheSentinelDemons:
ADangerousBargain
ADangerousHunger
ADangerousFury
TheCurveCollection:BigGirlsAndBadBoys
TheChangelingEncountersCollectionSeptember15,1996
HEsatnexttomeagaintoday.Ihavetoassumeit’sjustacoincidence,becauseIcan’timaginewhyhewouldwanttositnexttomeorgivemeoneofhisincrediblesmilesthatappearedtolightuptheratherdrearyroomofourcollegeEnglishLiteratureclass.I’mnotsureifI’mhappyornotaboutthefactthathesatrightbesideme.Honestly,Ihadtolookaroundtoseeexactlywhohewassmilingat.Certainlynotme.NotMadelineReynolds,theplainredheadedwomanwiththedorkyglassesandtoomuchmeatonherbones.Buttherewasnobodyelseintheroomatthetime,soIsupposehemusthavebeensmilingatme.Ididn’tsmileback.AndIhadaveryhardtimefocusingontheclassicswithHIMsittingnexttome.
September16,1996
HISnameisSamHudson.Heintroducedhimselftoday.ThemanmakesmypalmsdampandmymouthgoasdryasthedesertthemomentIseehim.Whenhereachedouthishandtodayandintroducedhimself,IhadtowipemyhandonmyjeansbeforeIstammeredmynametohimlikeacompleteidiot.HewasflashingthatsmileatmeagainandIwentcompletelybraindead,unabletofindevenoneintelligentthingtosaytohim.Whydoeshehavetobesohandsome…andtall?Everythingaboutthemanisjust…toomuch.Maybetomorrowhe’llsitnexttosomeoneelse.Ialmosthopehedoes.Hemakesmetoonervous.There’ssomethingstrangeaboutahandsomeguypayingattentiontomewithsomanyothergorgeouswomeninthesameclassroom.
September17,1996
SamcaughtuptometonightafterclasstoaskmeifIwantedtostudywithhim.He’sdoingthesamethingthatIamrightnow,workingduringthedayandknockingoutasmanyclassesashecantowardabusinessdegreeinnightcourses.Ihavenodoubtthathe’llbesuccessfulinbusiness.Hehasahungrylook,adeterminationtosucceedinthosebeautifulemeraldeyesofhis.ItoldhimIwantedtobeadoctor.I’mnotquitesurewhyItoldhim.Itellsofewpeoplebecauseit’slaughablethatdirt-poorMaddieReynolds,agirlshuffledfromfosterhometofosterhome,couldactuallyaspiretobeadoctor.Samjustsmiled,butitwasn’tamockingone.ThenhetoldmesincerelythathethoughtI’dmakeagreatdoctor.Howcouldheknowthat?Hedoesn’tevenknowme.Butatleasthewasn’tlaughingatme.
November14,1996
I’vebeensobusythatIhaven’thadachancetowriteforawhilenow.I’mdoingallthedoubleshiftsatthenursinghomethatIpossiblycan,plusmyclasses.Ihavetohaveenoughmoneytopayformynextsemester.Samtookmetohisapartmenttostudytonight,andheactuallyseemedembarrassedbecauseitwasastudioapartmentthatwasn’tinthegreatestneighborhood.Idon’tknowwhyheshouldbeembarrassed.Heworkssohard.HisconstructionjobishardphysicallaborandIknowthatheusuallyworksfromearlymorninguntileveningnearlysevendaysaweek.He’stryingtogetenoughmoneytobringhismomandhisyoungerbrotherheretoTampatolive.Samtalksmostlyaboutthefuture,probablybecausehispasthasn’tbeensogood.Icanrelatetothat.I’dratherthinkaboutthefuturemyself.I’veonlyknownSamforafewmonthsnow,buthe’sbecomethebestfriendI’veeverhadexceptforCrystal,andshe’sbeengoneforsomanyyearsnow.IfeelalittlesillythatIeverhaddoubtsaboutSam.He’saverygoodperson,thebestmanI’veeverknown.Andhe’ssosupportiveaboutallofmygoals.Ijustwishhe’dgetovercallingmehis“Sunshine”andpullingtherubberbandoutofmyhairbecausehesaysit’sashametoconfinesuchbeautifulhair.Istheguyblind?Myhairisabsolutelytragic!
December12,1996
SamsaidsomethingtometodaythatIthoughtwasstrange.Hesaidhisfriendshipwithmemadehimwanttobeabetterman.I’mnotsurewhatthatwasallaboutandhejustshruggedcasuallywhenIaskedhimwhathemeant.Howmuchbettercouldhebe?Heworkshisassoff,triestohelphisfamily,andisworkingtobetterhimselfbygettinganeducation.Doeshethinkbeingrichmakesamangood?Ifso,Iwishhewouldn’tthinkthat.SamHudsonisfinejustthewayheis.He’sperfect.Ijustwishhedidn’thavetoworksohard.
January10,1997
SamandIdon’thaveanyofthesameclassesthissemester,butthereisrarelyadaythatgoesbythatIdon’tspeaktohim.Idon’tknowifIcouldstandnottalkingtohimorseeinghishandsomeface.HemakesmelaughwhenI’mtiredandcrabby,andItrytokeepatubeofmusclereliefcreamaroundforwhenhisbodyhasbeenpushedtothelimitfromworkingsomanyhours.HetriestoupliftmyspiritswhileItrytorelievehisphysicalpain.Iguessthat’swhatfriendshipisabout.Hestrippedhist-shirtofftodaysoIcouldputthecreamonhisbackforhim.EverytimeIdothis,itgetsmoredifficulttokeepmyhandsfromshaking,andIhatemyselfforit.SamandIarefriends.HegivesmesomuchsupportandI’vecometorelyonhisfriendship.I’manursingassistant,forGod’ssake.Itisn’tlikeI’mnotfamiliarwiththehumanbody.It’sjust…Sam’sbody.Hisskinisalwaysblazinghotandhismusclesaretense.Sometimeshegroansadeep,masculinegroanofrelieffromhisbackpainwhenIapplythecream,andIfloodbetweenmythighsandmynipplesgethard.Istartthinkingaboutotherthingsthanjusthisbackpain.IknowIshouldn’t.ButIdo.Iknowmostwomenhavedone“thedeed”atmyage,butIhaven’t.I’veneverwantedto.NotuntilImetSam.Buthe’sjustafriendandIneedtoremindmyselfofthatfacteverysingleday,eventhoughmyheartandbodywantsomuchmore.
February14,1997
It’sValentine’sDayandsomethinghappenedtoday,somethingextraordinary.SamHudsongavemeasingleredrose…andthenhekissedme.Itwasn’ttheusualpeckonthecheekhegivesmeasafriend.Itwasareal,hot,wet,toe-curlingkissthatmademyheartpoundandmybodyburnformore.Webothcameoutofthekisspanting.I’msureIlookeddazedandconfusedbecausethat’showIfelt.Samlookedhorrified.Hecursedandstartedramblingabouthowhehadn’tmeanttodothatandhowIdeservedsomuchbetter.HesaidIshouldhavedozensofrosesinsteadofjustone.Itoldhimthatoneredrosewassomuchbetterthananythinganyonecouldeverdoformebecauseitcamefromhim.Icried.Icouldn’thelpit.Sohekissedmeagain…andagain.
April10,1997
SamandIhavebeenacouplefortwomonthsnowandhestillwon’tdo“thedeed”withme.Iwantto.I’vetoldhimthat.Mybodyrespondstohiseverytouch,everykiss.Ilovehimsomuchithurts,butIhaven’ttoldhimbecausehehasn’tsaiditeitherandI’mnotsurehewantstohearit.HesaysIpurrlikeakittenwhenhetouchesme,kissesme.Sadly,IthinkIdo,butit’sratherembarrassing.NotthatIhavealotofexperience,butIdon’tthinkanymancankisslikeSam.HeknowsthatI’mavirgin.Itoldhim.Hesayshe’safraidtotouchmesometimesbecauseI’mtoopure,toogood.IfonlyheknewthedreamsIhaveabouthim.Hewouldn’tthinkIwassoverygoodatall.IlovehimsomuchandIwanthimtobemyfirst.Myonly.IwanttotellhimthatIlovehim,butI’mscared.Whatifhedoesn’tfeelthesameway?
May12,1997
I’maloneagain,asI’vealwaysbeen.SamandIweresupposedtomeetforcoffeeyesterdayandasIapproachedthecoffeeshop,Isawtheminthealleyway.Thewomanwasbeautiful—tall,thin,andpretty—everythingIneverhavebeenandneverwillbe.Sam’sbackwasagainstthebrickbuildingandthewomanwasalloverhim,herhandsinhishair,kissingmySamlikehebelongedtoher.Hishandswereonherbreastandherbutt,holdinghermodel-thinbodyagainsthis,grindingagainsther.Ifrozeandstoodtherelikeadamnstatue.I’mnotsurehowlongIwatched,myheartreadytopoundoutofmychest,unabletobelievethatitwasreallymySamkissingthatwoman.But,ohmyGod,itwas.Whentheycameupforair,hiseyesimmediatelymetmine,thelookonhisfaceunmistakable.Guilt.Satisfaction.Inthatmoment,myheartshatteredintoamillionlittlepieces,andSamknewit.Heknewitandhedidn’teventrytoexplain.Idoubtanythingwilleverputitbacktogetheragain.Ihadtorunaway,andSamjustletmegowithoutasingleword.WasIreallythatstupid,thatna?ve?DidIreallythinkthatSamHudsonwasdoinganythingotherthanplayingagamewithme?Nobodyhaseverwantedme.Notasachild,norasanadolescent.Andnotasanadulteither.Mostlikely,nooneeverwill.I’llcrysomemoreandthenI’llsleep,andtrytoforgetwhatitfeltliketobewantedforashorttime.Itwasalljustalie.Dr.MadelineReynoldschewedonherthumbnail,alookoftotalconcentrationonherface,assheflippedthepagesofamedicalfileononeofherfive-year-oldpatientsattheclinic.Itwassevenp.m.,waypasttimeforhertogethomeandtrytogetsomerest,butsomethingaboutthecasewasnaggingather.Shehadtobemissingsomething,somethingimportant.Timmywastired,listless,havingoccasionalvomitinganddiarrhea,andithadtobemorethanavirus.Thepoortykehadbeenthatwayformonths.
Sighing,sheleanedbackinthechairofherofficeintheclinic,grimacingasshebitalittletoohardonherfingernail.She’dneedtoconsultapediatrician,runmoretests.SendingupasilentprayerthatTimmy’smotherwouldshowupatherson’snextappointment,Maddieclosedthefile.Thepoorkiddidn’thaveaneasylife,andhismotherwasn’texactlyconsistent.
“Hello,Madeline.”
Ahuskybaritonesoundedfromthedoorwayofheroffice,causinghertoleaptoherfeet,readytopushthealarmbuttononthesideofherdesk.Thefreeclinicwasn’tinagoodneighborhoodandpoorKarahadalreadycomeclosetogettingshottherewhileshewasvolunteering.
“Ididn’tmeantoscareyou.”
AcoldchillrandownMaddie’sspine,butnotfromfear.Sherecognizedthevoice.Eyesnarrowing,shefocusedonthebodyandfacebehindthatsmooth-as-velvetmasculinetone.“HowdidyougetbySimon’ssecurity?Andwhatinthehellareyoudoinghere?”
HerfriendKarawasengagedtobemarriedtoSam’sbrother,Simon.Unfortunately,duringthelastyear,thathadforcedhertobeincloseproximitytothemanwhohadbrokenherheartsomanyyearsago.Thosemeetingshadbeenbriefandincrediblytense.Luckily,shehadmanagedtoavoidanysignificantcommunicationwithhim…untilthismoment
SamHudsonshruggedandsteppedintotheroomasthoughheownedit.Evendressedcasuallyinapairofjeansandaburgundycable-knitsweater,themanoozedpowerandarrogance,carrieditonthosewideshoulderslikeanelegantmantle.“They’remysecurity,too,Sunshine.TheyworkforHudson.Doyouthinktheywoulddoanythingotherthanletmebythemwithapolitegoodevening?”
Arrogantbastard.Maddie’sheartracedandherpalmsgrewmoist.SimonandSamwerebothbillionaires,co-ownersofHudsonCorporation.So,itwasSam’scompany,too,butshetriedtoignorethatfactasmuchaspossible.Shewipedherhandsoverherdenim-cladthighs,wishingshehadn’tshoweredandchangedinthetinyshowerinthebackoftheclinicbeforecomingintoheroffice.MaybeitwouldhavebeeneasiertofaceSaminherprofessionalattire,herhairconfinedinaconservativeknot.Tryingtopushaflamingcorkscrewspiralbehindoneear,shestiffenedherspine,tryingtomakeherselfappeartallerthanherfive-foot-threeheight.“Whatdoyouwant,Sam?Thisishardlyyourneighborhood.AndIdon’tthinkyouneedtheservicesofahooker?”Hervoicewashard,brittle.Damnit.Whycouldn’tsheactnonchalant?Somanyyearshadcomeandgonesincethatheart-shatteringeventwithSam.Hewasastrangertohernow.Whycouldn’tshetreathimlikeone?
Movingcloser,heanswereddarkly,“Wouldyoucare,Sunshine?WoulditmattertoyouifIfuckedeverywomaninthecity?”
“Ha!Likeyouhaven’talready?Andstopcallingmebythatridiculouspetname.”Sheansweredsarcastically,butherheartwasracingandherbreathcaughtashemovedcloseenoughforhertocatchawhiffofhisenticingsmellofmuskandman,aspicyaromathatmadeherslightlydizzy.Hisscenthadn’tchanged,anditwasstillastemptingasithadbeenallthoseyearsago.
“Whyareyoustillhere?Mysecurityalertedmethatyouwerehereafterdark.Youshouldbehome.Thisneighborhoodisn’tsafeduringtheday,muchlessatnight,”hegrowledsoftly.
“Simon’ssecurity.”Somehow,shecouldn’tassociatethetwomen,eveniftheywerebrothers.Simonwasniceandhadaheartofgoldunderneathhisgruffexterior.Samwasthedevilhimself,SatandisguisedasaGQmodelwithmoremoneyandpowerthananymanhadtherighttohave.EspeciallyamanlikeSamuelHudson.
“Whatifsomethuggotthroughsecurity,foundyouherealoneandvulnerable?”Hemovedcloser,socloseshecouldfeelhiswarmbreathcaressinghertemple.
God,hewassotall,sobroadandmuscular.Samhadworkedconstructionwhenshehadknownhimyearsago,hardphysicallaborthathadgivenhimasculpted,perfectbody.Strangely,ithadn’tchangedonesinglebit.Howinthehelldidamanmaintainthatawesomebodysittingbehindadesk?Backingawayfromhisintimidatingpresence,herassbumpedagainstthedesk,leavinghernospacetomovefartheraway.
“Amancouldtakeadvantageofawomanaloneinanemptyoffice,”hecontinued,hisvoicelow,dangerous.
MaddiepushedagainstSam’schest,tryingtogetfreeofherwedged-inpositionbetweenhimandthedesk.“Move.Backoff,Hudson,beforeI’mforcedtosendyourballsintoyourthroat.”
Hismuscularthighmovedoverhers,annihilatingthepossibilityofbeingkneedinthegroin.“Itaughtyouthatmove,remember?Andnevertellyourattackeryourintentions,Madeline.”
Shecranedherneckandlookedathim,hisemeraldgreeneyeswatchinghercarefully.Justasithadyearsago,hishandsomefacetookherbreathaway.He’dalwaysremindedherofsomeancientblondgod,sodamnperfectthathisbodyandfeaturesshouldbecarvedinmarble.However,atthemoment,hemightbeashardasmarble,buthewasfarfromcold.Heatemanatedfromhisbodyinwaves,hiseyesjustasfieryandmolten.“Gofuckyourself,Hudson.”
Sam’slipsturnedup,twitchingprecariouslylikehewastryingnottogrin.Hishandssplayedoverherback,pullingherbodycompletelyintohisashewhisperedintoherear,“I’dratherfuckyou,Sunshine.Muchmoresatisfying.You’restillthemostbeautifulwomanI’veeverseen.Evenmorebeautifulthanyouwereyearsago.”
Liar.He’ssuchadamnliar.IfIhadbeensodesirablehewouldn’thavedonewhathedid.“Letgoandgetthehelloutofmyoffice.”Thebastardwasplayingher,anditwasintolerable.Shewasn’tbeautifulandshewasnothinglikethetwiggyblondemodelswhohesportedonhisarmandtooktohisbed.
“Kissmefirst.Provetomethatthereisn’tsomethingleftunfinishedbetweenus,”Samanswered,hisdarkgreeneyeslitwithsparksoffire,hisvoicehardanddemanding.
“Theonlythingleftunfinishedisthefactthatyouneverevensaidyouweresorryforwhatyoudid.Youdidn’tgiveadamn.Youdidn’t—”
Maddienevergotachancetofinish.Sam’shot,hardmouthsmotheredherbitterwords,neverasking,simplydemandingherresponse.Hislarge,agilehandsmoveddownherback,graspingherassandliftinghertoasittingpositiononthedesk,makingiteasierforhimtodevourhermouth.
Samneverjustkissed:hebranded,heclaimed.Maddiemoanedintohismouthashistonguethrustandretreated,thrustandretreated,untilshewasbreathless.Surrendering,herarmswoundaroundhisneck,herhandsfistinghissilkenwavylocksofhair,savoringthefallofsoftnessoverherfingertips.
Wrappingherlegsaroundhiships,needingtosomehowfindananchortokeepherfromdriftingawayinatidalwaveoflust,sheallowedhertonguetoduelwithhis,feelinghisarousalagainstherheatedcore.Herhipssurgedagainsthiserectionwitheveryhardthrustofhistongue.
Samgroaned,hishandsdelvingunderhersweatshirt,hisfingertipsstrokingoverthebareskinofherback,makinghershiverwithlonging.
Maddiewasdrowning,lostinaseaofdesireandneed,slowlybeingpulledunderthesurfacebyaforcestrongerthanherwill.
Ihavetostop.ThishastoendbeforeI’mcompletelylost.
Yankingherheadback,hermouthdisconnectedfromSam’s,leavingherpantingforoxygenandcompletelyshaken.Sampulledherheadforwardtorestagainsthisheavingchest.
“Shit.Maddie.Maddie,”hechokedout,onehandspearingintohercurls,strokingherhairreverently.
Oh,God.No.Shecouldn’tbesuckedinbySamHudsonagain.Notinanyway.Sheshovedhardagainsthischest,twistingawayandloweringherlegsuntilherfeethitthefloor.“Getoffme.”
Furybuilttoaraginginfernoinsideher.Howdareheuseher,playwithherbecausehewasboredandshewastheonlyavailablefemaleinthebuilding?SamHudsonwasaplayboy,amanwhotookwomentohisbedanddiscardedthem,findinganotherplaythingsoonafterhewasdonewiththelastone.Hewasrarelyseenwiththesamewomanmorethanonce.Didthemanhaveaconscience?Didhecareaboutnoonebuthimself?
Maddiewantedtocurlupintoalittleballtoprotectherself,shamedbythewayshehadrespondedtoSameventhoughhewasacompletedog.Whatkindofapersondidthatmakeher?
Sheshruggedawayfromhim,turningherbacktosprintforthedoor.
“Maddie.Wait.”Sam’svoicewashusky,pleadingyetdemanding.
Hegraspedherarm,swinginghertofacehimbeforeshewasabletogettothedoor.Maddieturnedtofacehim,herfuryandfearbattlingfordominance.“Don’ttouchmeagain.Ever.I’mnotthestupid,na?vewomanyouonceknew.Itrustedyouonce,andIforgavemyselfbecauseIwasyoung.Iwon’tdoitagain.Idon’thavetheexcuseofyouthtoevenjustifybeingthatstupid.”
“Youstillwantme,”Samansweredvehemently,hiseyesrakingoverherbody,settlingonherface.
Lookinghimstraightintheeye,sheansweredangrily,“No,Idon’t.Mybodymightrespondtoagorgeousman,butit’sjustphysiological,asexualreaction.You,”shepokedahandtohischestasshespatout,“meanabsolutelynothingtomeanymore.”
“Youwantmetofuckyouuntilyouscream.Icanstillmakeyoupurr,Kitten,”hetoldherarrogantly,asatisfiedsmirkonhisface.
Sheshrugged,tryingtoforcedownherviolentdesiretoslaptheconceitedlookfromhishandsomeface.“Iwouldn’tknow.You’veneverfuckedme.Andyouneverwill.”
Wrenchingherarmfromhishold,Maddiestormedthroughtheofficedoor,scoopingherjacketfromthehookbythereceptiondeskandboltingthroughthelobbyandoutthefrontdooroftheclinic.Shedidn’tlookback.Shecouldn’t.OneofHudson’ssecurityofficersescortedhertohercarandshedroveawayasifshewereaconvictedcriminalwiththelawonhertail,wantingnothingmorethantogetasfarawayfromSamasshecouldpossiblyget.
Maddiedroveinadaze,twowordsplayingthroughherhazybrainlikeabrokenrecord.
Neveragain.
Neveragain.
SamHudsonwalkedslowlythroughthereceptionareaoftheclinic,lostinhisownthoughts.Whatthehellhadjusthappened?He’dstoppedtoseeifMaddiewasokay,concernedthatshewasstillattheclinicsolate—aquickstoptomakesureallwaswellbecauseheknewshewasherealone.Damn.Couldheeverseethewomanandnotwanttopossess
You’venevergottenoverher.Youprobablyneverwill.She’shauntedyouforyears.Shegotunderyourskinlikeasliverofwoodthat’salwaysalittlebitrawandirritated,neverworkingitswayoutagain.
Steppingoutside,Samclosedthedoorbehindhim.Heglancedatoneofhissecurityofficers.“Canyoulockup?”
Themannodded.“Yes,sir.HopeyourmeetingwithDr.Reynoldswentokay.”
Sambarkedahumorless,self-mockinglaugh.“Yeah.Itwasveryinformative.”Ilearnedthatshestillfuckinghatesmeasmuchassheeverdid.Heliftedahandtotheotherguardsashedeparted,makinghiswaytohisvehicle.
Yep.Thatmeetinghadgonereallywell,hethoughtdarklyashesteppedintohisBugattiandstartedtheengine.
Youneverevensaidyouweresorry.
Herwordshauntedhim,wouldprobablyalwayshaunthimnow.“Fuck!”Samslammedhisfistagainstthesteeringwheelinfrustration.Nope.Hehadn’teversaidhewassorry.Thenagain,hehadn’tbeenabletosayitbackthen.Still,heshouldhavesaidit,foundawaytoapologizelater.Ithadn’tbeenpossibleaftertheincidenthadtakenplace,andhehadjustblownhissecondchanceafewminutesago.
WhatwasitaboutMaddiethatmadehimlosehisreason?
You’reactinglikeanassholebecauseshedoesn’treallycareaboutyouanymoreandit’seatingyoualive.Youmightbeabletohaveherbodyifyouseduceher…butneverherheart.Neveragain.
Once,yearsago,Maddiehadlookedathimwitheyesthatsparkledwithadmiration,adoration.Onebriefincidentandhehadwashedthatlookfromherbeautifuleyesforever.
Leaninghisforeheadagainstthesteeringwheel,heclosedhiseyes,stillabletopicturetheMaddiewhohadlookedathimwithrespectandaffectionevenwhenhehadn’thadtwopenniestorubtogether.Itwasironic:nowthathewasoneofthewealthiestmenintheworld,sheeyedhimlikeabugthatneededtobesquashed,arodentthatneededtobeexterminated.
You’llseeheragain.She’llbeforcedtotalktoyouforSimonandKara’swedding.Theweddingwasbeingheldinhishome,soMaddiewouldn’thaveachoice.Hewasthebestmanandshewasthemaidofhonor.Maddiewouldhavetoatleastbecivil,andSamknewshewould.Shewasconsiderateandloyaltoanyonesheconsideredafriend.HerownfeelingswouldtakeabackseattomakingsureKarahadahappywedding,onewithnohasslesorugliness.
AndnomatterhowMaddietreatsme,nomatterhowshelooksatme,Iwon’tbeadicktoher.Shit.Ihopeshedoesn’tbringaguywithher.IneveraskedSimonifshewasinvolvedwithanyone.
Samsatbackinhisseatwithaheavysighandputhiscaringear,wonderingifitwasevenpossibleanymoreforhimnottobeanasshole.Truthwas,theyearshadchangedhim,madehimintoamanwhohewasn’tatallcertainhelikedanymore.AndifMaddiehadamaninherlife,hewasevenmorelikelytoloseit
Findawoman,someonetotakeyourmindoffMaddie.
Snappinghisseatbeltonashebackedoutoftheparkingspace,Samtookadeepbreathandranthroughamentallistofpossiblewillingfemales…untilhecaughtatantalizingsmell,anelusivescentthatclungtenaciouslytohissweater.Herfragrance.Areminderofwhathadjustoccurredinheroffice.
“Fuck!Ican’tdoit.Ican’tbewithanotherwoman.Notnow,”hewhisperedtohimself,pissedoffthathehadkissedher,thathehadfeltherlushcurvesagainsthisbody.Now,thethoughtofspendingthenightinthebedofanyotherwomanbutMaddielefthimcold.Honestly,ithadlefthimcoldsincethemomenthehadseenMadelineagainoverayearago.
Sambrakedhisvehicleattheexitoftheparkinglot,glancingquicklyathiswatch,grinningasheturnedleftinsteadofright,headedtowardSimon’scondo.
Itwastime.
Simonhadcalledhimearlier,informingSamthathewasgoingtobeanuncle,andaskingforafavor,whichwasacompleterarityforSimon.TherewasnothingSamwouldn’tdoforhislittlebrother.HehadfailedtoprotectSimononce,anditwasn’thappeningeveragain.WhateverSimonneeded,he’dbethereforhim.
ThankGodSimonhadfoundKara.Samadoredhisbrother’sfiancée,wantingtokissthegroundshewalkedon,simplybecauseshelovedhislittlebrotherunconditionally,madeSimonhappierthanSamhadeverseenhim.AndSimondeservedthathappiness,thatkindofdevotionfromawoman.Unfortunately,watchingSimonandKaratogethermadeSamrealizejusthowemptyhisownlifewas,howdesolateandsuperficialhisexistencehadbecome.
LikeIhaven’talwaysknownthat?NothinghasbeenrealsinceIlostMaddie.
KissingMaddie,holdingheragainafterallthoseyears,hadmadethingsevenworse.Itwaslikesomethingwasawakeningdeepinsidehim,asensationthatwasfamiliar,yetnot.Certainly,itwasn’tcomfortable.
Forgether.ForgetwhatitfeltliketoloseyourselfinMaddie’ssoftness,herscent,thefeelofherlushcurvesanddeliciouslyeagermouth.
Samcursed,knowinghe’dbesleepingalonetonight,takinghimselfinhandashefantasizedaboutMaddie.Andthistime,thosememorieswouldbemuchmorevivid,newer,morerealthaneverbefore.
Fuck!Hewassocompletelyscrewed…anddefinitelynotinagoodway.
Maddieturnedthepageofthebookonherlap,wonderingwhyshejustdidn’tgiveupandgotobed.Itwasn’tlikeshewasreallyabsorbinganyofthewrittenwords.
“Damnit,”shewhispered,slammingthebookclosedanddroppingitonthetablebesidethesofa.Honestly,shedidn’twanttogotobed.Ifshedid,shewouldjustkeeprememberingherencounterwithSam,torturingherselfwithmemoriesofthatscorchinghotkissearlierintheevening.
Swipingtheremotecontrolfromthetable,shepushedthebuttontoactivatethetelevision,hopingshecoulddrownoutherthoughtswiththeteno’clocknews.
Herdoorbellrangjustasthenewsanchorstartedrecountingthetopstoriesoftheday.
Whothehellcoulditbe?Shehadnofamilyandnoneofherfriendswouldcometoherdooratthistimeofnightunlessitwasanemergency.Shesprangtoherfeetandsprintedtothedoor,herheartracing.Lookingthroughthepeephole,shesawamaninuniform,aHudsonsecurityuniform.
“Whoisitandwhatdoyouwant?”shecalledloudlythroughthedoor.
“SpecialValentine’sDaydeliveryforDr.Reynolds,”themancalledback
“Leaveitandgo.”Therewasnowayshewasopeningherdoor,eveniftheguywasapparentlyfromHudson.
“Iunderstand,ma’am.I’lljustleaveithereonthedoorstep.”Hebent,andthenstraightenedagainandleft
Maddieopenedthedooracrack,leavingthesecuritychaininplace.Shewatchedthemangetintohistruckanddriveaway.Sheliftedthechainandopenedthedoorcompletely,hereyeswidening.
Onherdoorstepwasthemostincrediblebouquetofredrosesshehadeverseen.Therewereseveraldozenflowers,toomanyforhertocountinherstunnedcondition.Liftingtheheavy,sturdyvasethatappearedtobemadeofcrystal,shesecuredthedoorbehindherandluggedtherosestoherdiningroomtable.Placingtheminthemiddleofthecircularoaksurface,shepluckedthecardfromthecenterofthearrangement.
Shesat,hershakykneesbarelyabletosupportherlegs.Thecardwassmall,theoutsideofthetinyenvelopedecoratedwithheartsandacutelittleCupidinthecorner.Theonlythingonthefrontwashername.Sheopeneditwithtremblingfingers,yankingthenotecardfromitssurroundingpaper.There,inhandwritingshestillrecognized,wereonlytwowords.
I’msorry.
Therewasnosignature,nootheridentifyingmarkings.
Droppingboththeenvelopeandcardonthetable,Maddieburiedherfaceinherhandsandwept.
EndofSample.HeartOfTheBillionaireisavailableathttp://bookshow.me/SAM