The War of Two Queens (Blood And Ash Series Book 4

TWOTQmap

Pronunciation
Guide
Characters
Aios–(a-uh-us)
Alastir–(al-as-tir)
Bele–(bell)
CasteelDa’Neer–(ca-steel)(da-near)
Delano–(dee-lay-no)
EloanaDa’Neer–(eee-lah-nah)(da-near)
Ione–(eye-on)
Isbeth–(is-bith)
JasperContou–(jas-per)(con-too)
KieranContou–(kee-ren)(con-too)
KingJalara–(ja-la-ra)
KirhaContou–(k-ah-ruh)(con-too)
Kolis–(co-lis)
MalecO’Meer–(ma-leek)(o-mere)
MalikDa’Neer–(ma-lick)(da-near)
Naill–(nuh-ile)
Nektas–(nic-tas)
Nyktos–(nik-toes)
PenellapheBalfour–(pen-nell-uh-fee)(bal-floor)
QueenIleana(uh-lee-aaa-nuh)
Rhahar–(ruh-har)
Rhain–(rain)
Saion–(si-on)
Seraphena–(see-ra-fee-na)
Sera–
(see-ra)
ValynDa’Neer–(va-lynn)(da-near)
VonettaContou–(vo-net-ta)(con-too)
Places
Atlantia–(at-lan-tee-ah)
Carsodonia–(car-so-don-uh)
Dalos–(day-los)
Iliseeum–(ah-lee-see-um)
Lasania–(la-sa-nee-uh)
Masadonia–(ma-sa-don-uh)
Massene–(ma-see-nuh)
NielValley–(nilevalley)
Padonia–(pa-doh-nee-ah)
Pensdurth–(pens-durth)
Solis–(sou-lis)
Terms
eather–(ee-thor)
notam–(no-tom)
Arae–(air-ree)
dakkai–(di-ah-kee)
graeca–(gray-cee)
kiyou-(ki-you)
meeyahLiessa–(mee-yahlee-sa)
Chapter1
Casteel
Theclickanddragofclaws
drewcloserastheweakflameabovethelonecandlesputteredandthenwentout,
pitchingthecellintodarkness.
Athickermassofshadows
appearedintheopenarchway—amisshapenformonitshandsandknees.It
halted,sniffingasloudlyasagodsdamnbarrat,scentingblood.
Myblood.
Thesmoothbandsofshadowstone
tightenedaroundmythroatandanklesasIshifted,bracingmyself.Thedamn
stonewasunbreakable,butitdidcomeinhandy.
Alow-pitchedwailcamefromthe
creature.
“Mother—”Thethingexplodedout
ofthearchway,scurryingforward,itskeeningmoanbecominganear-piercing
screech.“—fucker.”
Iwaiteduntilitsstenchof
decayreachedmeandthenpressedmybackagainstthewall,liftingmylegs.
Thelengthofthechainbetweenmyankleswasonlyabouthalfafoot,andthe
shackleswouldn’tgiveaninch,butitwasenough.Plantingmybarefeetintothe
creature’sshoulders,Igotagood,mostunfortunatelookatthethingasits
foulbreathblastedmeintheface.
Man,theCravenwasnotafresh
one.
Patchesofgrayfleshclungto
itshairlessskull,andhalfofitsnosewasgone.Oneentirecheekbonewas
exposed,eyesburninglikehotcoals.Lipstornandmangled—
TheCraventwisteditshead
down,sinkingitsfangsintomycalf.Itsteethtorethroughthebreechesand
intofleshandmuscle.Airhissedbetweenmygrittedteethasfierypainburned
itswayupmyleg.
Worthit.
Thepainwasmorethanworthit.
Iwouldspendaneternitytaking
thesebitesifthatmeantshewassafe.Thatitwasn’therin
thiscell.Thatshewasn’ttheoneinpain.
ShakingtheCravenfree,I
draggedtheshortchainoverthething’sneckasIcrossedmyfeet.Itwisted
atthewaist,pullingthedullbonechaintightacrossitsthroat,endingthe
Craven’sscreams.TheshackleclampeddownonmythroatasIkeptturning,
cuttingoffmyairasthechaindugintotheCraven’sneck.Itsarmsflailedon
thefloorasIjerkedmylegsintheoppositedirection,snappingthe
creature’sspine.ThespasmingbecamemoreofatwitchingasIhauleditwithin
reachofmyboundhands.Thechainbetweenmywrists,connectedtotheshackle
atmythroat,wasmuchshorter—butlongenough.
IgraspedtheCraven’scold,clammy
jowlsandbroughtitsheaddownhard,slammingitagainstthestonefloorbymy
knees.Fleshgaveway,sprayingrottingbloodovermystomachandchest.Bone
splitopenwithawet-soundingcrack.TheCravenwentlimp.Iknewitwouldn’t
staydown,butitboughtmesometime.
Lungsburning,Iunwoundthe
chainandkickedthecreatureawayfromme.Itlandedbythearchwayina
tangledmessoflimbsasIrelaxedmymuscles.Thebandaroundmyneckwasslow
toloosen,eventuallyallowingairintomyburninglungs.
IstaredattheCraven’sbody.
Atanyothertime,Iwould’vekickedthebastardintothehalllikeusual,but
Iwasweakening.
Iwaslosingtoomuchblood.
Already.
Notagoodsign.
Breathingheavily,Ilooked
down.Justbelowtheshadowstonebands,shallowslicesranuptheinsidesofmy
arms,pastbothelbowsandovertheveins.Icountedthem.Again.Justtobe
sure.
Thirteen.
Thirteendayshadpassedsincethe
firsttimetheHandmaidensswarmedthiscell,dressedinblackandasquietas
atomb.Theycameonceadaytocutintomyflesh,siphoningmybloodasifI
wereadamnbarreloffinewine.
Atight,savagesmiletwistedmy
mouth.I’dmanagedtotakeoutthreeoftheminthebeginning.Rippedtheir
throatsoutwhentheygottooclose,whichwaswhythey’dshortenedthechain
betweenmywrists.Onlyoneofthemactuallystayeddead,though.The
damnthroatsoftheothertwohadstitchedthemselvesclosedwithinminutes—impressive
andalsoinfuriatingtowitness.
Learnedsomethingvaluable,though.
NotalloftheBloodQueen’s
HandmaidenswereRevenants.
Iwasn’tsurehowIcoulduse
thatinformationyet,butIguessedtheywereusingmybloodtomakebrand-spanking-new
Revs.Orusingitasadessertforthelucky.
Tippingbackmyheadagainstthe
wall,Itriednottobreathetoodeeply.IfthestenchofthedownedCraven
didn’tchokeme,thedamnshadowstonearoundmythroatwould.
Iclosedmyeyes.Therehadbeen
moredaysbeforetheHandmaidensshowedthefirsttime.Howmany?Iwasn’t
exactlysure.Twodays?Aweek?Or—?
Istoppedmyselfthere.Shut
itthefuckdown
Icouldn’tgodownthatroad.I
wouldn’t.I’ddonethatthelasttime,tryingtoclockthedaysandweeksuntil
therecameapointwhentimesimplyceasedtomove.Hoursbecamedays.Weeks
becameyears.Andmymindbecameasrottenasthebloodseepingfromthe
Craven’sruinedhead.
Butthingsweredifferentinthe
hereandnow.
Thecellwaslarger,withno
barredentrance.Notthatthereneededtobeonewiththeshadowstoneandthe
chains.Theywereamixofironanddeitybone,connectedtoahookinthewall
andthentoapulleysystemtolengthenorshortenthem.Icouldsitupand
movealittle,butthatwasaboutit.However,thecellwaswindowlesslike
before,andthedank,mustysmelltoldmetheyonceagainheldmeunderground.
ThefreelyroamingCravenwerealsoanewaddition.
Myeyesopenedtothinslits.The
fuckbythearchwayhadtobethesixthorseventhonethathadfounditsway
intothecell,drawnbythescentofblood.Theirappearancemademethink
therewasonehellofaCravenproblemaboveground.
I’dheardofCravenattacks
insidetheRisesurroundingCarsodoniabefore.SomethingtheBloodCrownblamed
onAtlantiaandangrygods.I’dalwaysassumeditwasduetoanAscended
gettinggreedyandleavingmortalsthey’dfedontoturn.Now,Iwasbeginning
tothinktheCravenwerepossiblybeingkeptdownhere.Whereverherewas.
Andifthatwerethecase,andtheycouldgetoutandgetaboveground,socould
I.
IfonlyIcouldgetthesedamn
chainstoloosen.I’dspentanungodlyamountoftimepullingonthehook.In
allthoseattempts,itmayhaveslippedahalf-inchfromthewall—ifthat.
Butthatwasn’ttheonlything
differentaboutthistime.OtherthantheCraven,I’donlyseenthe
Handmaidens.Ididn’tknowwhattothinkaboutthat.I’dfiguredit’dbelike
thelasttime.Too-frequentvisitsfromtheBloodCrownandtheircronies,
wheretheyspenttheirtimetauntingandinflictingpain,feeding,anddoing
whatevertheywanted.
Ofcourse,mylastgo-around
withthiscaptivitybullshithadn’tstartedthatway.TheBloodQueenhadtried
toopenmyeyesfirst,coaxmetoherside.Turnmeagainstmyfamily
andmykingdom.Whenthathadn’tworked,therealfunhadbegun
Wasthatwhathadhappenedto
Malik?Didherefusetoplayalong,sotheybrokehimliketheyhadbeenso
veryclosetodoingwithme?Iswalloweddryly.Ididn’tknow.Ihadn’tseenmy
brother,either,buttheymusthavedonesomethingtohim.They’dhadhimfor
farlonger,andIknewwhattheywerecapableof.Iknewwhatthedesperation
andhopelessnesswaslike.Whatitfeltliketobreatheandtastetheknowledge
thatyouhadnocontrol.Nosenseofself.Eveniftheyneverlaidahandonhim,
beingkeptlikethis,asacaptiveandmostlyinisolation,preyedonthemind
afterawhile.Andawhilewasashorterspanoftimethanonemight
believe.Madeyouthinkthings.Believethings.
Drawingmythrobbinglegupas
farasIcould,Ilookeddownatmyhandsrestinginmylap.Inthedarkness,I
almostcouldn’tseetheshimmerofthegoldenswirlacrossmyleftpalm.
Poppy
Iclosedmyfingersoverthe
imprint,squeezingmyhandtightasifIcouldsomehowconjureupanythingbut
thesoundofherscreams.Erasetheimageofherbeautifulfacecontortedin
pain.Ididn’twanttoseethat.Iwantedtoseeherasshe’dbeenontheship,
faceflushed,andthosestunninggreeneyeswiththeirfaintsilverglowbehind
thepupilseagerandwanting.Iwantedmemoriesofcheekspinkwitheitherlust
orannoyance,thelatterusuallyoccurringwhenshewassilently—orvery
loudly—debatingwhetherstabbingmewouldbeconsideredinappropriate.Iwanted
toseeherlushlipsparted,andherskinshiningasshetouchedmyfleshand
healedmeinwaysshewouldneverknoworunderstand.Myeyesclosedoncemore.
Anddamnit,allIsawwasbloodseepingfromherears,hernose,asherbody
writhedinmyarms.
Gods,Iwasgoingtoripthat
bitchQueenintopieceswhenIgotfree.
AndIwould.
Onewayoranother,Iwouldget
freeandmakesureshefelteverythingshehadeverinflictedupon
Poppy.Tenfold.
Myeyessnappedopenatthefaint
soundoffootsteps.MusclestensedinmyneckasIslowlyeasedmylegstraight.
Thiswasn’tnormal.Onlyafewhourscould’vepassedsincethelasttimethe
Handmaidenshaddonethewholebloodlettingthing.UnlessIwasalready
beginningtolosetrackoftime.
Anunsteadinessroseinmychest
asIconcentratedonthesoundofthefootfalls.Thereweremany,butonewas
heavier.Boots.MyjawlockedasIliftedmygazetotheentryway.
AHandmaidenenteredfirst,nearly
blendinginwiththedarkness.Shesaidnothingasherskirtsglidedpastthe
fallenCraven.Withastrikeofsteelagainstflint,aflamecaughtthewickon
thecandleonthewall,wheretheotherhadburnedout.FourmoreHandmaidens
enteredasthefirstlitseveralmorecandles,thefemales’featuresobscured
behindwinged,blackpaint.
IwonderedthesamethingIdid
everytimeIsawthem.Whatthefuckwasupwiththefacialpaint?
I’daskedadozentimes.Never
gotananswer.
Theystoodoneithersideofthe
archway,joinedbythefirst,andIknewinmygutwhowascoming.Mystare
fixedontheopeningbetweenthem.Thescentofroseandvanillareachedme.
Rage,hotandunending,pouredintomychest.
Thenshewalkedin,appearingas
theutteroppositeofherHandmaidens.
White.Themonsterworea
skintightgownthatwasapristine,nearlytransparentwhiteandleftvery
littletotheimagination.Disgustcurledmylip.Otherthanthereddish-brown
hairreachingacinched,narrowwaist,shelookednothinglikePoppy.
Atleast,that’swhatIkept
tellingmyself.
Thattherewasnohintof
familiarityinthesetofherfeatures—theshapeofhereyes,thestraightline
ofherruby-piercednose,orthefull,expressivemouth.
Itdidn’tfuckingmatter.
Poppywasnothinglike
her.
TheBloodQueen.Ileana.Isbeth.
Betterknownasonesoon-to-be-deadbitch.
Shedrewcloser,andIstillhad
noideahowIhadn’trealizedthatshewasn’tAscended.Thoseeyesweredark
andbottomlessbutnotasopaqueasavampry’s.Hertouch…hell,ithadblended
withtheothersovertheyears.Butwhileithadbeencold,ithadn’tbeenicy
andbloodless.Thenagain,whywouldIoranyoneelseeverconsiderthe
possibilitythatshewassomethingotherthanwhatsheclaimed?
Anyonebutmyparents.
Theymusthaveknownthetruth
abouttheBloodQueen—aboutwhoshereallywas.Andtheyhadn’ttoldus.Hadn’t
warnedus.
Biting,stingingangergnawed.
Theknowledgemightnothavechangedthisoutcome,butitwould’veaffected
everyaspectofhowweapproacheddealingwithher.Gods,wewould’vebeen
betterprepared,knowingthatcenturies-oldrevengedrovetheBloodQueen’s
specialbrandofmadness.Itwould’vegivenuspause.Wewould’verealizedthat
shewastrulycapableofanything
Butnothingcouldbedoneabout
anyofthatrightnow,notwhentheyhadmechainedtoadamnwall,andPoppy
wasoutthere,dealingwiththefactthatthiswomanwashermother.
ShehasKieran,I
remindedmyself.She’snotalone.
ThefalseQueenwasn’taloneeither.
Atallmaleenteredbehindher,lookinglikeawalkinglitcandle.Hewasone
goldenmotherfucker,fromthehairtothewingedfacialpaintacrosshisface.
Hiseyeswereabluesopaletheyappearednearlyleachedofallcolor.Eyes
likesomeoftheHandmaidens.AnotherRev,Ibet.ButoneoftheHandmaidens
whosethroathadn’tstayedtornopenhadhadbrowneyes.NotallRevshadthe
lightirises.
Helingeredbytheentryway,his
weaponsnotashiddenastheHandmaidens’.Isawablackdaggerstrappedacross
hischestandtwoswordssecuredtohisback,thecurvedhandlesvisibleabove
hiships.Fuckhim.MyattentionshiftedtotheBloodQueen.
Candlelightglitteredoffthe
diamondspiresintherubycrownasIsbethglanceddownattheCraven.
“Idon’tknowifyourealizethis
ornot,”Isaidcasually,“butyouhaveapestproblem.”
Asingledarkbrowroseasshe
snappedherred-paintedfingerstwice.TwoHandmaidensmovedasaunit,picking
upwhatwasleftoftheCraven.TheycarriedthecreatureoutasIsbeth’sgaze
flickedtome.“Youlooklikeshit.”
“Yeah,butIcancleanup.You?”
Ismiled,notingthetighteningintheskinaroundhermouth.“Youcan’twash
offthatstenchorfeedthataway.Thatshitisinsideyou.”
Isbeth’slaughsoundedliketinkling
glass,gratingoneverysingleoneofmynerves.“Oh,mydearCasteel,Iforgot
howcharmingyoucouldbe.Nowondermydaughterappearstobesotakenwith
you.”
“Don’tcallherthat,”Isnarled.
Bothbrowsroseasshetoyed
witharingonherpointerfinger.Agoldenbandwithapinkdiamond.Thatgold
waslustrous,shiningeveninthedimlight—gleaminginawaythatonlyAtlantian
goldcould.“Pleasedon’ttellmethatyoudoubtI’mhermother.IknowI’mnot
aparadigmofhonesty,butIspokenothingbutthetruthwhenitcametoher.”
“Idon’tgiveafuckifyou
carriedherinyourwombforninemonthsanddeliveredherwithyourown
hands.”Myhandsclosedintofists.“Youarenothingtoher.”
Isbethwentunnaturallystill
andquiet.Secondstickedby,andthenshesaid,“Iwasamothertoher.She
wouldhavenomemoryofitasshewasjustatinybabethen,perfectandlovely
ineveryway.IsleptandwokewithherbesidemeeverydayuntilIknewI
couldnolongertakethatrisk.”Theedgesofhergowndraggedthroughthepool
ofCravenbloodasshesteppedforward.“AndIwasamothertoherwhenshe
thoughtIwasonlyherQueen,tendingtoherwoundswhenshewassogravely
injured.Iwould’vegivenanythingtohavepreventedthat.”Hervoicethinned,
andIcouldalmostbelieveshespokethetruth.“Iwould’vedoneanythingto
stopherfromexperiencingevenonesecondofpain.Ofhavingareminderof
thatnightmareeverytimeshelookeduponherself.”
“Whenshelooksuponherself,
sheseesnothingbutbeautyandbravery,”Isnapped.
Herchinlifted.“Youreally
believethat?”
“Iknowthat.”
“Asachild,sheoftencried
whenshesawherreflection,”shetoldme,andmychestseized.“Sheoften
beggedmetofixher.”
“Shedoesn’tneedfixing,”I
seethed,hating—absolutelyloathing—thatPoppyhadeverfeltthatway,
evenasachild.
Isbethwasquietforamoment.
“Still,Iwould’vedoneanythingtopreventwhathappenedtoher.”
“Andyouthinkyouplayedno
roleinthat?”Ichallenged.
“ItwasnotIwholeftthesafety
ofthecapitalandWayfair.ItwasnotIwhostoleheraway.”Herjawclenched,
juttingoutinagodsdamnfamiliarway.“IfCoralenahadn’tbetrayed
me—betrayedher—Penellapheneverwould’veknownthatkindofpain.”
Disbeliefbattledwithdisgust.
“Andyetyoustillbetrayedher,sendinghertoMasadonia?ToDukeTeerman,
who—”
“Don’t.”Shestiffenedonce
more.
Shedidn’twanttohearthis?
Toobad.“Teermanroutinelyabusedher.Heletothersdothesame.Madequitea
sportofit.”
Isbethflinched.
Sheactuallyflinched.
Mylipspeeledbackovermy
fangs.“Thatisonyou.Youdon’tgettoblameanyoneelseforthatandrelieve
yourselfofguilt.Eachtimehetouchedher,hehurther.That’sonyou.”
Shedrewinadeepbreath,straightening.
“Ididn’tknow.IfIhad,Iwould’vecuthisstomachopenandfedhimhisownentrails
untilhechokedonthem.”
Nowthat,Ididn’tdoubt.
BecauseI’dseenherdoittoa
mortalbefore.
Hertightlysealedlipstrembled
asshestareddownatme.“Youkilledhim?”
Asavagerushofsatisfaction
hitme.“Yeah,Idid.”
“Didyoumakeithurt?”
“Whatdoyouthink?”
“Youdid.”Sheturnedaway,
driftingtowardthewallasthetwoHandmaidensreturned,silentlytakingup
theirpostsbythedoor.“Good.”
Adrylaughleftme.“AndI’lldo
thesametoyou.”
Shesentmeasmallsmileover
hershoulder.“I’vealwaysbeenimpressedbyyourresilience,Casteel.I
imagineyougotthatfromyourmother.”
Acidpooledinmymouth.“You
wouldknow,wouldn’tyou?”
“Justsoyouknow…”shesaid
withashrug.Amomentpassedbeforeshecontinued.“Ididn’thateyourmother
atfirst.ShelovedMalec,buthelovedme.Ididn’tenvyher.Ipitiedher.”
“I’msureshe’llbegladtohear
that.”
“Doubtful,”shemurmured,
rightingacandlethathadtilted.Herfingersdriftedthroughtheflame,
causingittoripplewildly.“Idohatehernow,though.”
Icouldn’tcareless.
“Witheveryfiberofmybeing.”
Smokewaftedfromtheflameshe’dtouched,turningadark,thickblackthat
brushedagainstthedampstone,stainingit.
Thatwasn’tevenremotely
normal.“Whatinthehellareyou?”
“Iamnothingmorethanamyth.
AcautionarytaleoncetoldtoAtlantianchildrentomakesuretheydidn’t
stealwhattheydidn’tdeserve,”shesaid,lookingoverhershoulderatme.
“Areyoualamaea?”
Isbethlaughed.“Cuteresponse,
butIthoughtyouweresmarterthanthat.”Shedriftedtoanothercandle,
straighteningit,aswell.“Imaybenogodbyyourstandardsandbeliefs,but
Iamnolesspowerfulthanone.So,howamInotjustthat?Agod?”
Somethingtuggedatmy
memories—somethingIwassureKieran’sfatherhadoncesaidwhenwewere
younger.WhenthewolvenKieranlovedwasdying,andhe’dprayedtogodshe
knewweresleepingtosaveher.Whenheprayedtoanythingthatcouldbelistening.
Jasperhadwarnedhimthat…somethingthatwasn’tagodcouldanswer.
Thatafalsegodcouldreply.
“Demis,”Iwhisperedhoarsely,
myeyeswidening.“You’reademis.Afalsegod.”
OnesideofIsbeth’slipscurled
up,butitwasthegoldenRevwhospoke.“Well,apparently,heis
ratherclever.”
“Attimes,”shesaidwithashrug.
Holyshit.I’dbelievedthatthe
demiswereasmuchamythasthelamaea.“Isthatwhatyou’vealways
been?Apoorimitationoftherealthing,hell-bentondestroyingthelivesof
thedesperate?”
“That’saratheroffensive
assumption.But,no.Ademisisnotbornbutmadewhenagodcommitsthe
forbiddenactofAscendingamortalwhowasnotChosen.”
Ihadnoideawhatshemeantby
amortalthatwasChosen,andIdidn’tgetachancetoquestionthatbecause
sheasked,“WhatdoyouknowaboutMalec?”
Outofthecornerofmyeye,I
sawthegoldenRev’sheadtilt.“Whereismybrother?”Idemandedinstead.
“Around.”Isbethfacedme,
claspingherhandstogether.TheywerefreeofjewelsexceptfortheAtlantian
ring.
“Iwanttoseehim.”
Afaintgrinappeared.“Idon’t
thinkthatwouldbewise.”
“Why?”
Sheinchedtowardme.“You
haven’tearnedit,Casteel.”
Theacidspread,hittingmy
veins.“Hatetodisappointyou,butwe’renotplayingthatgameagain.”
Isbethpouted.“ButIlovedthat
game.SodidMalik.Admittedly,hewasmuchbetteratitthanyoueverwere.”
Furypoundedthrougheveryinch
ofmybody.Ilaunchedoffthefloorastheragewasgivensound.Ididn’tmake
itveryfar.Thebondsatmythroatjerkedmyheadbackastheshacklesonmy
anklesandwristsclampeddown,yankingmeagainstthewall.TheHandmaidens
steppedforward.
Isbethheldupahand,waving
themback.“Didthatmakeyoufeelbetter?”
“Whydon’tyougetclose?”I
growled,chestrisingandfallingasthebandatmythroatslowlyloosened.
“Thatwillmakemefeelbetter.”
“I’msureitwould,butyousee,
Ihaveplanswhichrequiremetokeepmythroatintactandmyheadstillonmy
shoulders,”shereplied,smoothingahandoverthechestofhergown.
“Planscanalwayschange.”
Isbethsmirked.“Butthisplan
alsorequiresyoutoremainalive.”Shewatchedme.“Youdon’tbelievethat,do
you?IfIwantedyoudead,you’dalreadybethat.”
Myeyesnarrowedonherasshe
tippedherchininacurtnod.ThegoldenRevsteppedoutintothehall,
returningquicklywithaburlapsack.Thestenchofdeathanddecayimmediately
hitme.EverypartofmybeingfocusedonthebagtheRevcarried.Ididn’t
knowwhatwasinthere,butIknewitwassomethingthatusedtobealive.Myheart
startedpounding.
“Itappearsthatmyonce
amicableandcharmingdaughterhasgrownquitethe…violentstreakwithaknack
forshowmanship,”IsbethremarkedastheRevknelt,untyingthesack.
“Penellaphesentmeamessage.”
MylipspartedasthegoldenRev
carefullytippedthesack,anda…godsdamnheadrolledout.Iimmediately
recognizedtheblondhairandsquarejaw.
KingJalara.
Holyfuck.
“Asyoucansee,itwasavery
interestingmessage,”Isbethstatedblandly.
Icouldn’tbelieveIwasstaring
attheBloodKing’shead.Aslowsmilespreadacrossmyface.Ilaughed—deep
andhard.Gods,Poppywas…damn,shewasviciousinthemostmagnificent
way,andIcouldnotwaittoshowherjusthowmuchIapprovedofit.
“That’s…gods,that’smyQueen.”
Surprisewidenedthegolden
Rev’seyes,butIlaugheduntilmyemptystomachcramped.Untiltearsstungmy
eyes.
“I’mgladyoufindthisentertaining,”
Isbethremarkedcoolly.
Shouldersshaking,Itippedmy
headbackagainstthewall.“ThatisthebestgodsdamnthingI’veseenina
longtime,tobehonest.”
“Iwouldsuggestyouneedtoget
outmore,but…”Shewaveddismissivelyatthechains.“Thatwasonlyapartofthe
messageshesent.”
“Therewasmore?”
Isbethnodded.“Therewerequite
afewthreatsincludedwithit.”
“I’msure.”Ichuckled,wishing
I’dbeentheretoseeit.Therewasn’tasinglepartofmethatdoubtedithad
beenPoppy’shandwho’dendedJalara’slife.
TheBloodQueen’snostrilsflared.
“Buttherewasonewarninginparticularthatinterestedme.”Shekneltina
slowslidethatremindedmeofthecold-bloodedserpentsfoundinthefoothills
oftheMountainsofNyktos.Theorangeandred,two-headedsnakeswerejustas
venomousastheviperinfrontofme.“Unlikeyouandmydaughter,MalecandI
werenevergrantedtheprivilegeofthemarriageimprint—proofthateitherof
uslivedordied.Andyouknowthatnoteventhebondsharedbetweenheartmates
canalerttheotherofdeath.Ihavespentthelastseveralhundredyears
believingthatMalecwasdead.”
Everyounceofhumorvanished.
“ButitappearsIhavebeen
mistaken.PenellapheclaimsthatnotonlyisMalecalive,butthatsheknows
whereheis.”TheRev’sheadcockedagainashefocusedonher.Isbethappeared
unaware.“Shesaidshewouldkillhim,andthemomentPenellaphestarts
believinginherpower,sheveryeasilycould.”Herdarkeyesfixedonmine.
“Isittrue?Doeshelive?”
Damn,Poppyreallywasn’t
messingaround.
“It’strue,”Isaidsoftly.“He
lives.Fornow.”
Herslenderbodypracticallyhummed.
“Whereishe,Casteel?”
“Comeon,Isbitch,”I
whispered,leaningforwardasfarasIcould.“Youshouldknowthereis
literallynothingyoucandothatwillmakemetellyouthat.Notevenifyou
broughtmybrotherinhereandstartedcuttingoffpiecesofhisskin.”
Isbetheyedmequietlyfor
severallongmoments.“Youspeakthetruth.”
Ismiledbroadly.Ididspeak
thetruth.IsbeththoughtshecouldcontrolPoppythroughme,butmystunning,
viciouswifehadcheckmatedherass,andtherewasnowayinhellIwould
jeopardizethat.NotevenforMalik.
“Irememberatimewhenyou
would’vedoneanythingforyourfamily,”Isbethsaid.
“Thatwasadifferenttime.”
“Nowyouwilldoanythingfor
Penellaphe?”
“Anything,”Ipromised.
“Becauseoftheopportunityof
whatsherepresents?”Isbethsuggested.“Isthatwhattrulyconsumesyou?After
all,throughmydaughter,youusurpedyourbrotherandyourparents.Youare
nowaKing.Andbecauseofherbloodline,sheistheQueen.Thatwould
makeyoutheKing.”
Ishookmyhead,unsurprised.Of
course,shewouldthinkthatwhatIfelthadeverythingtodowithpower.
“Youplottedforhowlongto
claimher?”shecontinued.“PerhapsyouneverplannedtousehertofreeMalik.
Maybeyoudon’tevenreallyloveher.”
Iheldherstare.“Whethershe
ruledoverallthelandsandseasorwastheQueenofnothingbutapileof
ashesandbones,shewould—will—alwaysbemyQueen.Loveis
tooweakanemotiontodescribehowsheconsumesmeandwhatIfeelforher.She
ismyeverything.”
Isbethwassilentforseveral
longmoments.“Mydaughterdeservestohavesomeonecareforherasfiercelyas
shecaresforthem.”AhintoffaintsilverglimmeredinthecenterofIsbeth’s
eyes,thoughnotasvividaswhatIsawinPoppy’s.Hergazedippedtotheband
aroundmythroat.“Ineverwantedthis—thiswarwithmydaughter.”
“Really?”Ilaugheddryly.“What
didyouexpect?Forhertogoalongwithyourplans?”
“Andmarryyourbrother?”The
lightinhereyesintensifiedasIsnarled.“Goodness,themereideaofthat
getstoyou,doesn’tit?IfIhadkilledyouwhenIhadyouthelasttime,then
hewould’veaidedherAscension.”
Ittookeverythinginmenotto
react—nottoattempttoripherheartfromherchest.“Youstillwouldn’thave
whatyouwanted.Poppywould’vefiguredoutthetruthaboutyou—aboutthe
Ascended.Shealreadywas,evenbeforeIcameintoherlife.Sheneverwould’ve
letyoutakeAtlantia.”
Isbeth’ssmilereturned,though
tight-lipped.“DoyouthinkthatallIwantisAtlantia?Asifthatisallmy
daughterwasdestinedfor?Herpurposeisfargreater.AswasMalik’s.Asis
yoursnow.Wearenowapartofthegreaterplan,andallofus,together,will
restoretherealmtowhatitwasalwaysmeanttobe.Ithasalreadybegun.”
Istilled.“Whatinthehellare
youtalkingabout?”
“You’llseeintime.”Sherose.
“Ifmydaughtertrulylovesyou,thiswillpainmeinwaysIdoubtyou’lleverbelieve.”
Sheturnedherheadslightly.“Callum?”
ThegoldenRevsteppedaround
Jalara’shead,carefulnottobrushagainstit.
Mygazesnappedtohim.“Idon’t
knowyou,butI’mgoingtokillyou,too,onewayoranother.JustthoughtI
shouldletyouknowthat.”
Hehesitated,hisheadcocking
totheside.“IfyouonlyknewhowmanytimesI’veheardthat,”hesaid,a
slightsmileformingashewithdrewaslendershadowstonebladefromthestrap
acrosshischest.“Butyou’rethefirstIthinkmightactuallysucceed.”
TheRevsnappedforwardthen,
andmyworldexplodedinpain.
Chapter2
Poppy
Throughthemazeofthe
pinesoutsidethewalledcityofMassene,Icaughtsightofasilverandwhite
wolvenpacingahead.
Ardenkeptlowtothethick
bushesclutteringtheforestfloorandsoundlesslymovedashenearedtheedges
ofthePinelands.ThelongandwideregionofswampywoodsborderedbothMassene
andOakAmblerandstretchedallthewaytothecoastoftheKingdomofSolis.
Thelandwasfullofinsects
thatsmelledofdecayandfedfromanyvisiblepatchofskinwiththehungerof
aCraven.Therewerethingstobefoundslitheringalongthemossy
groundifonelookedlongandhardenough.Andinthetrees,crudecirclesmade
ofsticksorbones,vaguelyresemblingtheRoyalCrestoftheBloodCrown,
exceptthatthelinewasataslant—diagonal—asitpiercedthecenterofthe
circle.
Massenesatnestledagainstwhat
wasknownastheDeadBonesClanterritory.
Wehadn’tseenanysignofthe
mysteriousgroupofpeoplewho’doncelivedwheretheBloodForestnowstood
andapparentlypreferredtofeedonthefleshofanythingliving—including
mortalsandwolven—butthatdidn’tmeantheyweren’tthere.Fromthemomentwe’d
enteredthePinelands,it’dfeltlikeahundredpairsofeyestrackedus.
Forallthosereasons,Iwasnot
afanofthePinelands.Although,Iwasn’tsureifitwasthecannibalsorthesnakes
Idislikedthemost.
ButifweweretoseizeOak
Ambler,thelargestportcitythisfareast,wewouldhavetotakeMassene
first.Andwe’dhavetodoitwithonlythewolvenandasmallbattalion.They
hadarrivedaheadofthelargerarmiesledby…hisfather,theformer
KingofAtlantia,ValynDa’Neer.Allbutonedrakentraveledwiththosearmies.
ButIhadn’tsummonedthedraken,awakeningthemfromtheirslumber,onlyfor
themtoburnthroughcitiesandpeople.
GeneralAylard,wholedthe
newlyarrivedbattalion,hadbeenmostdispleasedtohavelearnedthatandour
plansforMassene.ButIwastheQueen,andtwothingswereparamounttoall.
FreeourKing.
Andnotmakewarlikebefore,
upendinglivesandleavingcitiestobecomenothingmorethanmassburial
sites.Thatwasn’twhathewouldwant.Thatwasn’twhatIwanted.
MassenewaslargerthanbothNew
HavenandWhitebridge,butsmallerthanOakAmbler—andnotaswellguardedas
theportcity.Buttheyweren’thelpless.
Still,wecouldn’twaitany
longerforValynandtheothergeneralstoarrive.TheAscendedwholivedbehind
thosewallshadbeenleadingmortalsintothewoods,feedingfromthem,and
leavingthemtoturn.TheCravenattackswerebecomingmorefrequent,andeach
grouplargerthantheonebefore.Worseyet,accordingtoourscouts,thecity
hadgonequietduringtheday.Butatnight…
Therewerescreams.
Thentheyhadkilledthreeof
ourwolvenpatrollingthesewoodsthedaybefore,leavingonlytheirheadson
spikesatthePompayborder.Iknewtheirnames—wouldneverforgetthem.
Roald.Krieg.Kyley.
AndIcouldnolongerwait.
Twenty-threedayshadpassed
sincehe’dgivenhimselfovertoamonsterwho’dmadehimfeellikeathing.
SinceI’dlastseenhim.Sawhisgoldeneyesheat.Witnessedthedimpleform
firstinhisrightcheekandthenhisleft.Feltthetouchofhisfleshagainst
mineorheardhisvoice.Twenty-threedays.
Thearmoredplatesonmychest
andshoulderstightenedasIleanedforwardonSetti,gainingNaill’sattention
astheAtlantianrodetomyleft.Ikeptmygriponthewarhorse’sreinsfirm,
justas…hehadtaughtme.Iopenedmysenses,connectingwithArden.
Atangy,almostbittertaste
filledmymouth.Anguish.Andsomethingacidic—anger
“Whatisit?”
“I’mnotsure.”Iglancedtomy
rightShadowshadgatheredacrossKieranContou’sbeige-brownfeatures,the
once-bondedwolvenandnowAdvisortotheCrown.“Buthe’supset.”
Ardenstoppedtherestlesspatrol
asweapproached,hisvibrantbluegazeswingingtome.Hewhinedsoftly,the
soundtearingatmyheart.Arden’suniqueimprintremindedmeofthesaltysea,
butIdidn’ttrytospeaktohimthroughthePrimalnotamsincethe
wolvenwasn’tyetcomfortablecommunicatingthatway.“What’swrong?”
Henoddedhislarge
silver-and-white-streakedheadtowardtheRiseofMasseneandthenturned,prowling
throughthetrees.
Kieranheldupaclosedfist,
haltingthosebehindusasheandNaillmovedahead,navigatingtheheavily
clusteredpines.Iwaited,reachingforthepouchsecuredtomyhip.Thesmall
woodenhorseMalikhadcarvedfor…hissixthbirthdaypressedagainst
themarriageimprintonmypalm.
Malik.
Theonce-heirtotheAtlantian
throne.Hehadbeentakencaptiveintheprocessoffreeinghisbrother.And
bothofthemhadbeenbetrayedbythewolvenhe’donceloved.
ThesadnessI’dfeltatlearning
thatSheahaddonesuchathingwasnowovershadowedbythegriefandanger
thatMalikhaddonethesame.Itriednottolettheangergrow.Malikhadbeen
heldcaptiveforacentury.Onlythegodsknewwhathadbeendonetohimor
whathe’dhadtodotosurvive.Thatdidn’texcusehisbetrayal,though.Didn’t
lessentheblowitdealt.Buthewasalsoavictim.
Makehisdeathasquickand
painlessaspossible.
WhatValynDa’Neerhadaskedof
mebeforeIleftAtlantiasatheavilyonmyheart.ItwasaweightIwould
bear.Afathershouldn’thavetostrikedownhisownson.Ihopeditdidn’t
cometothat,butIalsocouldn’tseehowitwouldn’t.
Kieranstopped,hisemotions
suddenandintense,slammingintomeinbitterwavesof…horror
Rattledbyhisreaction,my
stomachknottedwithdread.“Whatisit?”Iasked,seeingthatArdenhad
stoppedoncemore.
“Deargods,”Nailluttered,
jerkingbackonhissaddleatwhateverhesaw,hisdeepbrownskintakingona
grayishpallor.Hishorrorwassopotentitscratchedagainstmyshieldslike
bitterclaws.
Whentherewasnoanswer,
trepidationgrew,encompassingmyentirebeing.IeasedSettiforwardbetween
KieranandNaill,towheretheMasseneRisegateswerevisiblethroughthe
pines.
Atfirst,Icouldn’tmakesense
ofwhatIsaw—thecross-likeshapeshangingfromthemassivegates.
Dozensofthem.
Mybreathingturnedragged.
Eatherthrummedinmytighteningchest.Bilecreptupmythroat.Ijerkedback.
BeforeIlostmybalanceandtoppledfromthesaddle,Naill’sarmsnappedout,catching
myshoulder.
Thoseshapeswere…
Bodies.
Menandwomenstrippedbare,
impaledatthewristsandfeettoMassene’sironandlimestonegates,their
bodiesdisplayedforanytolookupon—
Theirfaces…
Dizzinessrushedme.Theirfaces
weren’tbare.TheywereallshroudedinthesameveilIhadbeenforcedto
wear,heldinplacebygoldchainsgleamingdullyinthemoonlight.
Astormofragereplacedthe
disbeliefasSetti’sreinsslippedfrommyfingers.Eather,thePrimalessence
ofthegodsthatflowedthroughallthemanydifferentbloodlines,throbbedin
mychest.FarstrongerinmebecausewhatwasinsidemecamefromNyktos,the
KingofGods.Theessencemergedwithicy-hotfuryasIstaredatthebodies,
mychestheavingwithtoo-shallow,too-quickbreaths.Athinmetallictaste
coatedtheinsideofmymouthasIlookedbehindthehorroronthegate,tothe
topsofthedistantspiraltowers,eachastainedivoryagainsttherapidly
darkeningsky.
Above,thepinesbegantrembling,
showeringuswiththinneedles.Andthatanger,thehorroratwhatI
saw,builtandbuiltuntilthecornersofmyvisionturnedsilver.
Mygazeshiftedtothosewho
walkedthebattlementsoftheRise,oneithersideofthegatewherethebodies
offellowmortalsweresocruellydisplayed,andwhatfilledmymouth,clogged
mythroat,camefromwithinme.Itwasshadowyandsmokyandalittlesweet,
rollingacrossmytongue,anditcamefromaplacedeepinsideme.Thiscold,
achinghollownessthathadwokeninthelasttwenty-threedays.
Ittastedlikethepromiseof
retribution.
Ofwrath.
Anddeath.
ItasteddeathasI
watchedtheRiseGuardsstopmerefeetfromthebodiestospeaktooneanother,
laughingatsomethingthatwassaid.Mygazenarrowedonthemastheessencepulsed
inmychest,andmywillrose.Asharpgustofwind,colderthanawinter’s
morning,rolledacrosstheRise,liftingthehemsoftheveilsandwhipping
aroundtheguardsonthewall,sendingseveralslidingbacktowardtheedge.
Theystoppedlaughingthen,and
IknewthesmilesIcouldn’tseefaded.
“Poppy.”Kieranleaned
fromhissaddle,claspingthenapeofmyneckbeneaththethickbraid.“Calm.
Youneedtofindcalm.Ifyoudosomethingnowbeforeweknowexactlyhowmanyare
ontheRise,itwillalertthemtoourpresence.Wemustwait.”
Iwasn’tsureIwantedtocalm,
butKieranwasright.IfwewantedtotakeMassenewithminimallossof
life—thoseinnocentswholivedinsidethewallsandwereroutinelyturnedinto
Cravenandhungfromthegates—Ineededtogetcontrolofmyemotionsand
abilities.
AndIcould.
IfIwantedto.
Inthepastweeks,I’dspenta
lotoftimeonthePrimalnotam,workingwiththewolventoseehow
muchdistancewecouldputbetweenusandstillbeabletocommunicate.Other
thanKieran,I’dhadthemostsuccesswithDelano,whomIcouldreachdeep
withintheWastelandsthroughthenotam.ButI’dalsofocusedon
harnessingtheeathersothatwhatIpicturedinmymindbecamemywillandwas
carriedoutbytheenergyinstantaneously.
SoIcouldfightlikeagod
Fistingmyhands,Iwilledthe
eatheraway.Ittookeverypartofmybeingtostopmyselffromallowingthe
promiseofdeathtoflowoutfromme.
“Youokay?”Kieranasked.
“No.”Iswallowed.“ButI’min
control.”IlookedatNaill.“Areyouokay?”
TheAtlantianshookhishead.“I
can’tunderstandhowanyoneiscapableofdoingsuchathing.”
“NeithercanI.”Kieranlooked
pastmetoNaillasArdenbackedawayfromthetreeline.“Ithinkit’sgood
thatwecan’t.”
Iforcedmyattentiontothe
battlementsalongthetopofthewall.Icouldn’tlooktoolongatthebodies.
Icouldn’tallowmyselftoreallythinkaboutthem.JustlikeIcouldn’tallow
myselftothinkaboutwhathewasgoingthrough—whatwasbeingdoneto
him.
Afeatherlightbrushagainstmythoughts
came,followedbythespringy-freshimprintofDelano’smind.Thewolvenwas
scoutingthelengthoftheRisetogaininformationonexactlyhowmanywere
guardingit.MeyaahLiessa?
IswallowedasighattheoldAtlantian
phrasethatroughlytranslatedtomyQueen.Thewolvenknewthey
didn’thavetorefertomeassuch,butmanystilldid.However,whereDelano
diditoutofwhathefeltwasashowofrespect,Kieranoftencalledmethat
tosimplyannoyme
Ifollowedtheimprintbackto
Delano.Yes?
Therearetwentyatthe
northerngates.Abeatofsilencepassed.And…
Hisgrieftaintedthebond.Ibriefly
closedmyeyes.Mortalsonthegate.
Yes.
Theessencethrobbed.How
many?
Twodozen,heanswered,
andviolentenergypressedagainstmyskin.Emilisconfidenthecantake
themoutquickly,hesaid,referencingtheoften-irreverentElemental
Atlantian.
Myeyesopened.Masseneonlyhad
twogates—onetothenorth,andthisone,whichfacedtheeast.“Delanosaysthere
aretwentyonthenortherngates,”Ishared.“Emilbelieveshecantakethem.”
“Hecan,”Kieranconfirmed.
“He’sasgoodwithacrossbowasyouare.”
Imethisstare.“Thenit’s
time.”
Holdingmygaze,henodded.The
threeofusliftedthehoodsonourcloaks,hidingthearmorNaillandIwore.
“Ireallywishyouhadsomesort
ofarmor,”ItoldKieran.
“Armorwouldmakeitmore
difficultformeifIneedtoshift,”hestated.“Andattheendoftheday,no
armorisahundredpercenteffective.Thereareweakspots—placesthosemenon
theRiseknowtoexploit.”
“Thanksforremindingme,”Naill
mutteredaswequietlyrodetowardtheedgeofthepines.
Kieransmirked.“That’swhatI’m
herefor.”
IshookmyheadasIsearchedfor
Delano’simprint,notallowingmyselftothinkofthelivesthatmyorderwould
soonend.Takethemout.
Delanoquicklyresponded.Gladly,
meyaahLiessa.Wewillsoonjoinyouattheeastgate.
“Beready,”IsaidoutloudasI
turnedmyfocustothoseontheRisebeforeus.
Iliftedmystaretothe
moonlight-drenchedbattlement.Threedozenindividualswhoprobablyhadno
choicebuttojointheRiseGuardstoodthere.Therewaslittleopportunityfor
mostinSolis,especiallyiftheyweren’tbornintofamiliessteepedinthe
powerandprivilegegivenbytheAscended.Thosewholivedsofarfromthe
capital.Muchlikemosteasternlocales,withtheexceptionofOakAmbler,
Massenewasn’taglitteringandwealthycity,mainlyconsistingoffarmerswho
tendedcropsthatfedmostofSolis.
Butthosewholaughedand
chattedasifthoseimpaledtothatgatedidnotaffectthem?Thatwasawhole
differentbreedofapathyandjustascoldandemptyasanAscended.
JustlikewithDelano,Ididn’t
thinkofthelivesabouttobecutshortbymywill.
Icouldn’t.
Vikterhadtaughtmethatages
ago.Thatyoucouldneverconsiderthelifeofanotherwhentheyheldasword
pointedatyourthroat.
Therewasnoswordatmythroat
now,buttherewerethingsmuchworseheldtothethroatsofthose
insidetheRise.
Isummonedtheeather,andit
respondedatonce,rushingtothesurfaceofmyskin.Silvertintedmyvision
asKieranandNaillliftedcrossbows,eachoutfittedwiththreearrows.
“I’lltakethosefartherdownthe
Rise,”Kieransaid.
“I’llgetthosetotheleft,”
Naillconfirmed.
Whichleftthedozenbythe
gates.Theeatherswirledinsideme,pouringintomyblood,somehowhotandicy
atthesametime.Itfloodedthathollowplaceinsidemeaseveryounceofmy
beingfocusedonthosebythegate.
Bythepoor,veiledmortals.
Mywillleftmeattheexact
momenttheimageofwhatIwantedfilledmymind.Thesnapoftheirnecks,one
afteranotherinquicksuccession,joinedthesnapofreleasedarrows.There
wasnotimeforanyofthemtoscream,toalertthosewhomaybenear.Kieranand
Naillquicklyreloaded,takingouttheothersbeforetheoneswhosenecksI’d
brokenevenbegantofall.
Buttheyjoinedthosestruckby
arrows,fallingforwardintothenothingness.Iflinchedatthesoundoftheirbodies
hittingtheground.
Werodeout,crossingtheclearingasanothercloakedfigurejoinedmeonhorseback,comingfromtheleft
oftheRise.Asnow-whitewolvenfollowedEmil,keepingclosetothewallasI
quicklydismounted.
“Thosesonsofbitches,”Emilgrowled,
headtiltedbackashelookedupatthegates.“Theutterdisrespect.”
“Iknow.”Kieranfollowedmeas
Iwenttothechainsecuringthegate.
AngerbrimmedfromEmilasI
claspedthecoolchains.
Ardenstirredrestlesslynear
thehorses’hoovesasEmilquicklydismounted,joiningme.Naillpulledthem
forwardasDelanobrushedagainstmylegs.Itooktheminmyhandandclosedmy
eyes.I’ddiscoveredthattheeathercouldbeusedinthesamemannerasdraken
fire.WhileitwouldnotkillaRevenant—orhaveanyeffectonthem,really—itcould
meltiron.Notinlargequantities,butenough.
“Weneedtohurry,”Kieransaid
quietly.“Dawnisapproaching.”
Inoddedasasilveryaura
flaredaroundmyhands,ripplingoverthechainwhileEmilpeeredinthrough
thegate,searchingforsignsofotherguards.Ifrownedastheglowpulsed,
andpiecesofthemetalappearedtodarken—thickenalmostasifitwere
tendrilsofshadow.Blinking,thewispsdisappeared.Orwereneverthere.The
lightwasnotthegreatest,andeventhoughIwasagod,myeyesightand
hearingremainedannoyinglymortal.
Thechainfellapart.
“Niftytalent,”Naillremarked.
Isenthimabriefsmileashe
andEmilquicklyandquietlymovedthegateforward.
ThePinelandscamealiveasthe
gateopened,twigssnappingasthewolvenprowledforwardinasleekwaveof
severaldozen,ledbyKieran’ssister.
Vonettawasthesamefawncolor
asKieran,notnearlyaslargeashimwheninwolvenform,butnolessfierce.
OurgazesbrieflymetasIfoundherimprint—whiteoakandvanilla.Besafe,
Itoldher.
Always,camethequick
replyassomeoneclosedthegatesbehindus.
Turningfromher,Ifixedmy
gazeonthesilent,stone,one-storybarracksseveralyardsbackfromtheRise.
Beyondthemandthefieldsofcrops,theoutlineofsmall,squatbuildings
couldbeseenagainstCauldraManorandtheloominghorizonthatwasalreadybecoming
alighterblue.
Optingfortheshortsword
insteadofthewolvendagger,Iwithdrewitfromwhereitwassecuredtomyback,
handletilteddownward,asweracedforwardunderthedarknessofthepines
liningthewide,cobblestoneroad.Wehaltedbeforethebarracks,thewolven
crouchinglowtotheground.
Ipressedintothescratchybark
ofapineasIpeeredintothewindowsofthegas-lamp-litbarracks.Afew
peoplemovedaboutinside.Itwasonlyamatteroftimebeforetheytooknote
ofthefactthatnoonewasontheRise.
Kieranjoinedme,hishand
landingonthetreeabovemine.“Weprobablyhavearoundtwentyminutesbefore
dawnarrives,”hesaid.“TheAscendedshouldalreadyberetiringforthe
night.”
Inodded.TherewerenoTemples
inMassene,oraRadiantRowlikeinMasadonia,wherethewealthymortalslived
sidebysidewiththeAscended.InMassene,allthevampryslivedwithin
CauldraManor
“Remember,”Isaid,tightening
mygriponthesword.“Weharmnomortalwholowerstheirweapon.Weharmno
Ascendedwhosurrenders.”
Thereweremurmursandsoft
snarlsofagreement.KieranturnedtoNaillandnodded.TheAtlantianslipped
forwardandthenmovedwithblindingspeed,reachingthesideofthebarracks.
Hedraggedtheedgeofhisswordalongthebuilding,creatinganear-aching
grindingsoundagainstthestone.
“Well,”Emildrawled.“That’s
onewayofdoingit.”
Adoorflungopen,andaguard
steppedout,bladeinhand.Hisheadwhippedfromsidetoside,butNaillhad
alreadydisappearedintothepines.
“Whogoesthere?”theguard
demandedasseveralmorespilledoutfromthebarracks.Themansquintedinto
thedarkness.“Who’southere?”
Ipulledawayfromthepine.
“Doesitreallyhavetobeyou?”
Kieranquestionedinalowvoice.
“Yes.”
“Theactualanswerisno.”
“No,it’snot.”Ieasedpast
him.
Kieransighedbutmadenomove
tostopme.“Oneofthesedays,youwillrealizeyou’reaQueen,”hehissed.
“Notlikely,”Emilremarked.
Iwalkedoutofthepines,my
sensesopen.Thementurnedtome,nothavingrealizedyetthatnoonewason
theRise.
“WhoIamisnotimportant,”I
said,feelingtherippleofsurprisethatcamewiththeirrealizationthata
femalestoodbeforethem.“Whatis,isthatyourcityhasbeenbreached,and
you’resurrounded.Wearenotheretotakefromyou.We’reheretoendthe
BloodCrown.Laydownyourweapons,andyouwillnotbeharmed.”
“Andifwedon’tlaydownour
swordstosomeAtlantianbitch?”themandemanded,andtartuneaseandanxiety
radiatedfromafewofthemenbehindhim.“Whatthen?”
Mybrowsrose.Theseguardswere
awarethatasmallportionoftheAtlantianarmieshadbeencampedoutattheedges
ofPompay.Theyweren’t,however,awarethatadrakenwasamongus.
OrthattheAtlantianQueenwas
alsowiththeencampmentandcurrentlythebitchtheywerespeaking
to.
Thewordsburnedtosay,butI
spokethem.“Youdie.”
“Isthatso?”Themanlaughed,
andIstifledtherisingdisappointment,remindingmyselfthatmanymortalshad
noideawhotheyserved.Whotherealenemywas.“AmIormymensupposedtobe
afraidofapitifularmythatsendsovergrowndogsandbitchestofighttheir
battles?”Helookedoverhisshoulder.“Lookslikewe’llhaveanotherheadto
putonthepike.”Hefacedme.“Butfirst,we’llmakerealgooduseofthat
mouthandwhateverisunderthatcloak,won’twe,boys?”
Therewereafewroughlaughs,
butthattartnessincreasedfromothers.
Itiltedmyhead.“Thisisyour
lastchance.Laydownyourswordsandsurrender.”
Thesillymortalswaggered
forward.“Howaboutyoulaydownonyourbackandspreadthemlegs?”
Hotangerpressedagainstmy
backasIturnedmygazetohim.“No,thankyou.”
“Wasn’treallyasking.”Hetookone
morestep.Thatwasasfarashemadeit.
Vonettasprangoutofthe
darkness,landingontheguard.Hisshoutendedwithaviciousclampofher
jawsonhisthroatasshetookhimdown.
Anotherchargedforward,raising
hisswordatVonettaasshedraggedthefoul-mouthedmanacrosstheground.I
shotforward,catchinghisarmasIthrustmybladedeepintohisbelly.Blue
eyessetinafar-too-youngfacewidenedasIyankedtheswordbackout.
“Sorry,”Imurmured,shovinghim
away.
Severaloftheguardslurched
towardVonettaandme,onlytorealizethatwewerenotwhotheyshouldbe
worriedabout—amomenttoolate.
Thewolvencameoutofthepines,
swarmingtheguardsinamatterofseconds.Thecrunchofboneandsharp,
too-shortscreamsechoedinmyheadasKierandrewhisbladeacrossaguard’s
throat.
“Whenwillmortalsstop
referringtousasovergrowndogs?”heasked,pushingthefallenguardaside.
“Dotheynotknowthedifferencebetweenadogandawolf?”
“I’mgoingtosayno.”Emil
stalkedpasttheonewho’dgoneatVonetta,spittingonthedeadman.Helooked
upatme.“What?HewasgoingtoknifeNettaintheback.I’mnotaboutthat.”
Icouldn’treallyargueagainst
thatasIturnedtothesoldiersneartheback,theonesI’dfelttheuneasefrom.
Fiveofthem.Theirswordslayattheirfeet.Thesicklybitternessoffear
coatedmyskinasDelanostalkedforward,blood-streakedteethbared.The
stenchofurinehittheair.
“W-wesurrender,”onechattered,
shaking.
“Delano,”Icalledsoftly,andthe
wolvenhalted,growlingatthemen.“HowmanyAscendedarehere?”
“Therearet-ten,”theman
answered,hisskinaspaleasthewaningmoonlight
“WouldtheybereturningtoCauldra
Manor?”Kieranasked,comingtostandbesideme.
“Theyshouldalreadybethere,”
anothersaid.“They’llbeunderguard.TheyhavebeensincetheDukebecame
awareofyourencampment.”
IglancedatNaill,wholedSetti
andtheotherhorsesforward.“Didallofthemtakepartinwhatwasdoneto
thoseonthegates?”
Thethirdone—anoldermanthan
mostontheRise,inhisthirdorfourthdecadeoflife—said,“Noneofthem
resistedDukeSilvanwhenhegavetheorders.”
“Whowerethosetheychosetokill?”
Kieranasked.
Anotherwaveofdisappointment
swelled,weighingheavilyonmychest.Iwantedto—no,Ineededto—believe
thattherewereotherAscendedlike…likeIan,mybrother,evenifwesharedno
blood.Therehadtobe.
“Theydiditatwill,”thefirst
guard,theonewho’dspokenhissurrender,shared.Helookedclosetovomiting.
“Theyjustpickedpeopleout.Young.Old.Didn’tmatter.Ain’tnoonewhowas
causingtrouble.Noonecausestrouble.”
“Thesamewiththeothers,”
anotheryoungerguardsaid.“Those,theyledoutbeyondtheRise.”
Kieranfocusedonthemortal,
hisjawclenched.“Youknowwhatwasdonetothem?”
“Ido,”theeldestofthemsaid
aftertheothersspoke.“Theyledthemoutthere.Fedfromthem.Leftthemto
turn.NoonebelievedmewhenIsaidthatwaswhathappened.”Hejerkedhis
chinattheonesbesidehim.“TheysaidIwascrazy,butIknowwhatIsaw.I
justdidn’tthink…”Hisgazewenttothegates.“IthoughtmaybeIwas
crazy.”
Hejusthadn’tconsideredwhat
alltheAscendedwerecapableof.
“Youwereright,”Kieran
replied.“Ifitbringsyouanyrelieftoknowthat.”
Sensingthattheknowledgedid
verylittle,IturnedtoNaill,sheathingmysword.“Makesuretheyremainin
thebarracks.Unharmed.”IgesturedatArden.“StaywithNaill.”
Naillnoddedashehanded
Setti’sreinstome.Grippingthestrapsonthesaddle,Ihoistedmyselfup.
Theothersfollowedsuit.
“Didyouspeakthetruth?”the
eldestasked,stoppingasweguidedthehorsesoutfromthebarracks.“Thatyou’re
notheretotakefromus?”
“Idid.”Mygripfirmedon
Setti’sreins.“We’renotheretotake.We’reheretoendtheBloodCrown.”
Dippingunderaguard’soutstretchedarm,theedgesof
thecloakflutteredaroundmylegsasIspun,thrustingthesworddeepintothe
man’sback.Itwistedsharply,duckingassomeonethrewaknifeinmygeneral
direction.Delanoleaptoverme,diggingintotheguardwithhisclawsand
teethasIpoppedup.
NoneoftheguardsoutsideofCauldra
surrendered.
Thepinkishraysofdawn
streakedacrosstheskyasIwhirled,gruntingandkickingout,pushingaguard
back.HefellintoVonetta’spath.Stalkingtowardthebarreddoors,Ibrought
thesworddown,clangingoffanotherasEmilcameupbehindhim,dragginghisblade
acrosstheman’sthroat.Hotbloodsprayedtheair.Kieranjabbedoutwithadagger
upunderthechinofanotherguard,clearingthepathbeforeme.
Therewassomuchdeathhere.
Bodiesscatteredaboutthebarecourtyardasbloodpooledonthedullivorysteps
andsplatteredtheexteriorwallsofthemanor.SummoningthePrimalessenceas
Iliftedahand,brightsilverylightfunneleddownmyarmandsparkedfrommy
fingers.Theeatherarcedacrossthespace,slammingintothedoors.Wood
splinteredandgaveway,explodingintofineshards.
Thereceivinghall,adornedwith
crimsonbannersandbearingtheBloodCrown’screstinsteadofthe
white-and-goldthathunginMasadonia,wasempty.
“Underground,”Kieransaid,stalking
toourright.Blooddottedhischeeks.“Theywould’vegoneunderground.”
“Andyouknowhowtogetthere?”
Icaughtuptohim,reachingoutwithmysensestoensurethathewasn’thurt.
“CauldraappearslikeNew
Haven.”Hedraggedhishandoverhisface,wipingawaythebloodthatwasn’t
his.“They’llhavechambersunderground,nearthecells.”
Itwasalmostimpossiblenotto
thinkofthecellsunderNewHaventhatI’dspenttimein.ButKieranwasright
ashefoundtheentrancealongthehallontheright.
Hekickedinthedoor,revealing
anarrow,torch-litstairwell.Hesentmeawildgrinthatcausedmybreathto
catchbecauseitremindedmeof…ofhim.“WhatdidIsay?”
MybrowspinchedasDelanoand
Vonettastreakedpastus,joinedbyablackish-graywolvenIrecognizedas
Sage.Theyenteredthestairwellbeforeus.“Whydotheydothat?”
“Becauseyou’retheQueen.”Kieran
entered.
“Youkeeptellingherthat.”
Emilfellintostepbehindme.“Andyoukeepremindingher…”
Irolledmyeyesaswehurried
downthemusty-scentedstairsthatstrokedamemorythatrefusedtowiggle
free.“ImaybetheQueen,butI’malsoagod,andthereforehardertokill
thananyofyou.Ishouldgofirst,”Itoldhim.Tobehonest,noneofushad
anyideawhatwouldkillme,butwedidknowthatIwasbasicallyimmortal.
Ifeltaskipinmychest.I
wouldoutliveeveryoneinthismanor,somewhohadbecomepeopleIcaredabout.
ThoseIcalledfriends.IwouldoutliveTawny—whowouldeventuallywakefrom
theinjurytheshadowstonebladehadcaused.Icouldn’tallowmyselftobelieve
anythingelse,eventhoughIknew,deepdown,thatitcouldn’tbegoodfor
someonetosleepthatlong.
IwouldoutliveKieranand…and
evenhim
Gods,whywasIeventhinking
aboutthatrightnow?Don’tborrowtomorrow’sproblems.Thatwaswhathe’d
saidonce.
Ireallyneededtolearnhowto
followthatadvice.
“Hardertokilldoesn’tmeanimpossible
tokill,”Kieranshotoverhisshoulder.
“Saystheonenotinarmor,”I
snappedback.
Heletoutaroughlaugh,but
thesoundwaslostinthesudden,shrillshriekthatcausedtinybumpsto
spreadacrossmyskin.
“Craven,”Iwhisperedaswe
roundedthecurveinthestairwell,andKieransteppedintoafaintlylithall.
Hestoppeddirectlyinfrontofme,andIbouncedoffhim.
Kieranstared.
SodidI.
“Goodgods,”Emilmurmured.
ThecellswerefullofCraven.
Theypressedagainstthebars,armsoutstretched,andlipspeeledback,
revealingtheirfourjaggedfangs.Somewerefresh,theirskinonlynowtaking
ontheghastlyshadeofdeath.Otherswereolder,thosewithsunkencheeks,
tornlips,andsaggingskin.
“Whyinthehellwouldtheyhave
Craveninhere?”Emilaskedoverthepained,hungryhowling.
“Theyprobablyletthemoutfrom
timetotimetoterrorizethepeople,”Isaidnumbly.“TheAscendedwouldblame
theAtlantians.SayingtheyturnedtheCraven.Butthey’dalsoblame
thepeople,claimingtheyangeredthegodssomehowandthiswastheir
punishment.ThatthegodslettheAtlantiansdothis.ThentheAscendedwould
saytheyspoketothegodsontheirbehalf,assuagingtheiranger.”
“Peoplebelievedthat?”Emileased
pastseveralofthebloodstainedhands.
“It’sallthey’veeverbeen
allowedtobelieve,”Itoldhim,lookingawayfromtheCraven.
Thesoundsofpawingand
scratchingleduspastthecells—beyondwhatwe’dhavetodealwithlater—and
downanotherhall,throughcratesofwineandale.Wefoundthewolvenjustas
theytorethroughthedoublewoodendoorsattheend.
Avamprycameflyingoutofthe
chamber,astreamofsablehairandfangsbared—
Delanotookherdown,latching
ontothevampry’sthroatashedugintoherchestwithhisfrontpaws,tearing
throughclothingandskin.
Iturnedaway,buttherewas
nowheretolookasthetwofemalewolvendidthesamewithtwomorethatattacked.
Andthentherewereonlypiecesleft.
“Thatlookslikeitwouldgive
themanupsetstomach,”Isaid.
“I’mtryingnottothinkabout
that,”Emilmurmured,fixinghisstareontheAscendedwhostoodwithinthechamber,
frozenwiththeirweaponsallbutforgottenintheirhands.“Ibetthey’re
tryingnottothinkofthateither.”
“Anyofyouwanttomeetthe
samefate?”Kieranasked,extendinghisswordtothechunksonthefloor.
Therewasnoanswerfromwithin,
butasmorewolvenfilledthehallbehindus,theAscendeddroppedtheir
weapons.
“Wesurrender,”amalebitout,
thelasttothrowhisswordaside.
“Niceofyoutodothat,”Kieran
drawledashekickedtheswordsoutoftheirreach.
Anditwas.Niceofthem.Butit
wasalsotoolate.TherewouldbenosecondchancesgiventoanyAscendedwho’d
takenpartinwhathadbeendonetothoseontheirgatesandwhatwashappening
inthiscity.
Ididmylevelbestnottostep
onwhatremainedoftheAscendedonthefloorasIenteredthechamber,flanked
closelybyVonettaandDelano.Isheathedtheswordandloweredmyhood.
“Congratulations,”thesamemale
spoke.“YoutookMassene.ButyouwillnottakeSolis.”
Themomentheopenedhismouth,
IknewthishadtobeDukeSilvan.Itwastheairofself-assuredsuperiority.He
wasanicyblond,tallandwell-formedinhisfinesatinshirtandbreeches.He
wasattractive.Afterall,veryfewthingsinSoliswerevaluedhigherthan
beauty.Whenhelookeduponme,hesawthescars,andthatwasallhe
saw.
AndallIsawwasthebloodthat
stainedtheirexpensiveclothing.Itmarkedeachtailoredshirtandbodice.
IstoppedinfrontoftheDuke,
staringintopitch-blackeyesthatremindedmeofher.TheBloodQueen.Mymother.
Hersweren’tthisdark,pitiless,empty,andcold.Butshehadthesameeerie
sparkoflight—thoughmuchdeeper—thatdidn’trequirelighttohittheirfaces
attherightangletosee.Itwasn’tuntilthatverymomentthatIrealizedthe
traceoflightintheireyeswasaglimmerofeather
Itmadesenseforthemtocarry
atrace.ThebloodofanAtlantianwasusedtoAscendthem,andallAtlantians
carriedeatherintheirblood.ItwashowtheAscendedachievedtheirnear
immortalityandstrength.Theirspeedandabilitytoheal.
“DoanyAscendedremain?”
DukeSilvan’ssneerwasawork
ofart.“Fuckoff.”
Besideme,Kieran’ssighwasso
impressive,Iwould’vethoughtitrattledthewalls.
“I’llaskonemoretime,”I
said,countingquickly.Therewereten.Orpartsoften,anyway,butIwanted
tobesurethatwasallofthem.“Arethereanymore?”
Alongmomentpassed,andthen
theDukesaid,“Youwillstillkillus,nomatterhowIanswer.”
“Iwould’vegivenyouachance.”
TheDuke’seyesnarrowed.“For
what?”
“Tolivewithouttakingfrommortals,”
Isaid.“ToliveamongAtlantians.”
Hestaredatmeforamomentand
thenlaughed.“Youreallythinkthat’spossible?”Anotherlaughpartedhispale
lips.“Iknowwhoyouare.I’drecognizethatfaceanywhere.”
Kieransteppedforward.
Iheldupahand,stoppinghim.
TheDukesmirked.“Youhaven’t
beengonelongenoughtoforgethowmortalsare,Maiden.Howtheyare
sodamngullible.Howmuchtheyfear.Whattheywilldotoprotecttheir
families.Whattheywillbelievetoprotectthemselves.Youreallythinkthey
willsimplyaccepttheAtlantians?”
Isaidnothing.
Emboldened,hesteppedcloser.
“AndyouthinktheAscendedwilldo…what?Trustthatyouwillallowustolive
ifwedowhateveritisyouwant?”
“YoutrustedtheBloodQueen,”I
said.“Andhernameisn’tevenIleana.NorissheanAscended.”
Severalsharpinhalessounded,
buttheDukeshowednosignthatwhatI’dsaidwasnewstohim.
“So,”Icontinued,“Iimagine
anythingispossible.ButasIsaid,Iwould’vegivenyouanotherchance.
Yousealedyourfatewhenyouorderedthosepeopletobeimpaledonyour
gates.”
Hisnostrilsflared.“Theveils
werealovelytouch,weren’tthey?”
“Verylovely,”Irepliedas
Delanoemittedalowgrowl.
“Wedidn’t—”oneoftheother
Ascendedstarted,amalewithdeepbrownhair
“Shutup,”theDukehissed.“You
willdie.Iwilldie.Allofuswill.”
“Correct.”
Hisheadjerkedbacktome.
“Whatmattersishow
youdie,”Istated.“Idon’tknowifbloodstoneisapainfuldeath.I’veseen
itupcloseandpersonal,anditappearstobeso.I’mthinkingifIseverthe
spine,therewouldonlybeasecondofpain.”
TheDukeswallowedashissmirk
faded.
“Butwhatwasfarmorepainful
washowtheonesinpiecesdied.”Ipaused,watchingthecornersofhismouth
tighten.“Answermyquestion,andyourdeathwillbequick.Don’t?Iwillmake
sureyoufeelasifitlastsalifetime.That’suptoyou.”
Hestared,andIpracticallysaw
thewheelsturninginhismind,searchingforawayoutofthis.
“It’saterriblething,isn’t
it?”Isteppedclosertohim,andtheessencepulsedinmychest.“Toknowthat
deathisfinallycomingforyou.Toseeitrightbeforeyou.Tobeinthesame
chamberwithit,forseconds,minutes,longer,andknowthatyoucandonothing
topreventit.”Myvoicelowered,becamesofterandcolder…andsmoky.
“Notasinglething.It’shorrifying,theinevitabilityofit.Theknowledge
thatifyoustillhaveasoul,itissurelyboundforonlyoneplace.Deepdown,
youmustbesoafraid.”
Asmall,visibleshuddercoursed
throughhim.
“Justlikethosemortalsyouled
outsidetheRise,toreinto,fedoff,andlefttoturn.Justlikethoseinthe
cellsandthoseonthegates.”Isearchedhispalefeatures.“Theymusthavebeen
soterrifiedtolearnthatdeathhadcomeforthematthehandsofthosethey
believedprotectedthem.”
Heswallowedoncemore.“There
arenomoreAscended.Thereneverhasbeen.Noonewantstoruleattheedgeof
therealm.”Hischestrosewithadeepbreath.“Iknowwhoyouare.Iknowwhat
youare.It’swhyyou’restillstanding,alivetothisday.It’snotbecause
you’reagod,”hesaid,hislipcurling.“It’sbecauseofthebloodthat
coursesthroughyourveins.”
Myspinestiffened.“Ifyousay
it’sbecauseofwhomymotheris,Iwillnotmakeyourdeathquick.”
TheDukelaughed,butthesound
wasascoldandharshasthatspaceinsideme.“Youthinkyou’reagreat
liberator,don’tyou?CometofreethemortalsfromtheBloodCrown.Freeyour
precioushusband.”
Everythinginmestilled.
“KilltheQueen—yourmother—and
taketheselandsinthenameofAtlantia?”Thesparkofeatherwasinhiseyes
then.Thecornerofhislipscurvedup.“Youwilldonosuchthing.Youwill
winnowar.Allyouwillaccomplishisterror.Allyouwilldoisspillsomuch
bloodthatthestreetsfloodwithit,andthekingdomswilldrowninriversof
crimson.Allyouwillliberateisdeath.Allthatyouandthosewhofollowwill
findhereisdeath.Andifyourloveisluckyenough,hewillbedeadbeforehe
seeswhat’sbecomeof—”
Unsheathingmybloodstone
dagger,Ithrustitintohischest,piercinghisheartandstoppingthe
poisonouswordsbeforetheycouldpenetratetoodeeply.Andhefeltit—the
firstsplinteringofhisbeing,thefirsttearingofhisskinandbone.AndI,
forone,wasgratefulforthat.
Hissoullesseyeswidenedin
surpriseasfinelinesappearedinthepaleskinofhischeeks.Thecracks
deepenedintoaweboffracturesthatspreaddownhisthroatandunderthe
collarofthetailoredsatinshirthewore.Iheldhisstareasthetinyember
ofeatherwentoutofhisblackeyes.
And,onlythen,forthefirst
timeintwenty-threedays,didIfeelnothingatall.
Chapter3
Twenty-eightdays.
Nearlyamonthhadpassed,and
theconstantachethrobbedsointenselyithurt.Iclampedmyjawshutagainst
thescreambirthedfromthecavernthathadbecomemyheart,oneoffrustration
andever-presenthelplessnessandguilt.BecauseifIhadcontrolledmyself,if
Ihadn’tlashedout…
Thereweresomanyifs.
SomanywaysIcould’vehandledthingsdifferently.ButIhadn’t,andthatwasone
ofthereasonshewasn’there.
Thefluffyandbutterymoundof
eggsandstripsoffriedmeatbeforemelosttheirappealasthescreambuilt
inmythroat,pressingagainstmysealedlips.Abone-deepsenseofdesperation
roseandswiftlygavewaytopotentfury.Thecenterofmychesthummed,the
ancientpowerpulsingwithbarelyleashedrage.
TheforkIheldtrembled.Pressure
seizedmychest,closingoffmythroataseatherpulsedandswelled,pushing
againstmyskin.IfIscreamed,ifIgaveintoallthepainandrage,the
soundofdesperationandanguishwouldbecomewrathandfury.Thescream
chokingme,thepowerbuildinginsideme,tastedofdeath
Andasmallpartofmewantedto
letitout.
Fingersseveralshadesdeeper
thanmineclosedovermyhand,stillingthetremor.Thetouch,somethingthat
hadoncebeensoforbidden,joltedmefromthedarkpath,asdidthefaint
chargeofenergythatpassedbetweenus.Slowly,mylefthandwasturnedsothe
shimmerygoldenswirlofthemarriageimprintwasvisible.
ProofthatheandI
werestilltogether,evenifseparated.
Proofthathestilllived.
Mygazerose,collidingwiththe
strikingwinter-blueeyesofawolven.
Concernwasevidentinthesharp
anglesofKieran’shandsomefaceandthetensionbracketinghismouth.He
lookedtired,andhehadtobe.Hehadn’tbeensleepingwellbecauseI
hadhardlybeensleeping.
Theforktrembledagain—no,it
wasn’tjusttheforkormyarmthatshook.Thedishesvibrated,asdidthe
table.Downthehall,thehangingwhite-and-goldAtlantianbannersthathad
replacedtheonesbelongingtotheBloodCrownshuddered.
Kieran’sgazeflickedpastthe
emptychairsintheCauldrabanquethall,towherethelight-hairedAtlantian,
GeneralAylard,stoodguardatthepillaredopening.
IsensedthesamethingnowasI
hadwhenhefirstintroducedhimself.Distrustbrimmedbeneathhisimpassive
features,tastingofvinegar.Itwasn’tasurprisingemotion.Manyoftheolder
Atlantianswerecautiousofme,eitherbecauseIhadbeenraisedbytheir
enemies,theAscended,orbecauseIwasmanythingstheyhadn’texpected
AscarredMaiden.
Ahostage.
AnunwantedPrincesswho’d
becometheirQueen.
Agod.
Icouldn’texactlyholdtheir
warinessagainstanyofthem,especiallywhenImadetheentiremanortremble.
“You’restartingtoglow,”
KieranwarnedinawhisperthatIcouldbarelyhear,slidinghishandaway.
Ilookeddownatmypalm.A
faintsilversheenemanatedfrommyskin.
Well,thatexplainedwhythe
generalnowstared.
Loweringtheforktotheplate,
Isteadiedmybreathing.Iforcedmymindpastthesuffocatingburstofpain
thatalwaysaccompaniedthoughtsofhimasIslippedmyhandunderthe
tabletothesmallpouchsecuredtomyhipandreachedfortheglassofmulled
winewiththeother.IwashedawaythesourtastewithspiceasAylardturned
slowly,hisglovedgripremainingonhissheathedsword.Thewhitemantle
drapedoverhisshoulderssettled,drawingmygazetothegold-embossed
AtlantianCrest.ThesamecrestnowliningthewallsofCauldra—asunandits
rays,aswordandarrowatthecenter,crosseddiagonallysobothlengthswere
equal.Brieflyclosingmyeyes,Ifinishedoffthewine.
“Isthatallyou’regoingto
eat?”Kieranaskedafterafewmoments.
Iplacedtheemptyglassonthe
tableasIglancedattheopenwindow.Brokenpiecesofafoundationjuttedup
frombushyyellowwildflowers.Massenewasnotwellkept.“Iate.”
“Youneedtoeatmore.”He
restedhiselbowsonthetable.
Myeyesnarrowedonhim.“And
youdon’tneedtobeconcernedaboutwhatI’meating.”
“Iwouldn’thavetobeifyou
didn’tleavebaconuntouchedonyourplate—somethingIneverthoughtI’dsee.”
Iliftedmybrows.“Itsounds
likeyou’resuggestingIatetoomuchbaconbefore.”
“Nicetryatdeflecting.But,
ultimately,afailure,”Kieranreplied.“I’mdoingwhatyouandCasaskedof
me.I’madvisingyou.”
Hisname.
ThebreathItookstung.Hisname
hurt.Ididn’tliketothinkit,letalonesayit.“I’mconfidentthatmydaily
foodintakewasnotwhateitherofuswasthinkingwhenweaskedyoutobeour
advisor.”
“NeitherwasI.Butherewe
are.”Kieranleanedinsoonlyahandfulofinchesseparatedus.“You’rebarely
eating.You’rebarelysleeping.Andwhatjustoccurred?Theglowing?Themaking
theentirebuildingshake?Youseemedcompletelyunawareofit,andit’s
happeningmoreoften,Poppy.”
Therewasn’tanounceofcensure
inhistone,onlyconcern,butIstillsquirmedbecauseitwastrue.The
essenceofthegodswascomingtothesurfacewhenIwasn’tusingittotake
awaypainorheal.IthappenedwhenIfeltsomethingtoostrongly—whenthe
sorrowandragemademyskinfeeltootight,pushingatthefragileseamsthat
heldmetogether.
Ineededtokeepittogether.I
neededcontrol.Icouldn’tloseit.NotwhentheKingdomsofAtlantiaandSolis
werecountingonme.Notwhenheneededme.“I’lltryharderto
controlit,”Ipromised.
“Thisisn’taboutyou
controllingyourabilities.”Kieran’sbrowsknitted.“It’saboutlettingyourself
notbeokay.You’restrong,Poppy.We—”
“Iknow.”Istoppedhimas
memoriesofnearlythesamewordswhisperedthroughme,spokenfromotherlips
thathadblazedaheatedpathalongeveryinchofmyskin.
Youdon’thavetoalwaysbe
strongwithme.
Isnappedforward,pickingupa
sliceofbacon.Ishovedhalfofitintomymouth,nearlychokingmyself.
“Happy?”Iasked,apieceploppingtotheplate.
Kieranstared.“Notexactly.”
“Soundslikethat’syour
problem.”Ichewed,barelytastingthecrispymeat.
Ahuffthatsoundedlikealaugh
drewmyattentiontothelarge,purplish-blackdrakenrestingnearthepillared
entrywayofthebanquethall.Smooth,blackhornsstartedinthemiddleofthe
flattenedbridgeofhisnoseandranupoverthecenterofhisdiamond-shaped
head.Thefirstcoupleofhornsweresmallsoasnottoobstructhisvision,
butastheytraveleduphishead,theylengthenedintosharpenedpointsthatjutted
outfromthickfrills.
EverytimeIlookedatReaver,
itwasashock.Ididn’tthinkI’devergetusedtoseeingsuchamagnificent,
frightful,andbeautifulbeing.
Twenty-threedrakenhadawakened.
Theyoungest,threeintotal,remainedatSpessa’sEndtostandguardthere,as
decidedbythedraken.Outofthetwentythattraveledwiththearmies,none
wereaslargeasReaver.Instead,theywereaboutthesizeofSetti,their
scalesnotnearlyasthickasReaver’sandmoresusceptibletothesharpedgeof
anarrow.Buttheywouldstillmakequickworkofanyarmy.
Thedrakenwatchedus,andIwondered
whathewasthinkingandfeeling.WheneverIattemptedtogetareadonhimor
anyoftheotherswhilearoundthem,Ifeltnothing.Itwasn’tlikethecold
hollownessofanAscended.EitherReaverandtheotherdrakenwereshielding
theiremotionsfromme,orIsimplycouldn’treadthem.
“Wouldyoulikesome?”Ioffered
toReaver,liftingtheplate.Ihadn’tseenhimeat,whichdrummedupaweebit
ofconcernoverexactlywhathewaseatingwhenhetookflight,
disappearingfromview.
Ireallyhopeditwasn’t
people…orcuteanimals.
ButIhadnowayofknowing.
OnlyAurelia,oneofonlytwofemaledrakenwhohadawakened,hadbeeninher
mortalformlongenoughformetolearnthenamesofabouthalfofthe
two-dozendrakenwhohadleftIliseeum.She’dsaidthatmywillwastheirs
beforeweleftAtlantiaandpartedways.
Thewhole,my-will-was-theirs
thinghadn’texactlybeenhelpful,butI’dlearnedthatitwassomewhatlike
thePrimalnotam.ReaverseemedtoinherentlyknowwhatIwanted.Like
whenwelefttotakeMassene,andhe’dalreadyhunkereddowntosleepforthe
night.IguesseditwasmorelikethePrimalessenceintermsofhowitresponded
towhatIwilled.
Reavershookhisspikedheadat
myofferofbacon.
“Howdidheevengetinherewithout
bringingtheentirebuildingdown?”TheskinbetweenKieran’sbrowscreased.
“Carefully,”Isaidasthe
draken’sattentiondriftedtothewolven.Theverticalpupilsconstrictedas
hisblueeyesnarrowedoncemore.Isuspectedthatthedrakenwouldtake
anotherswipeatKieranthenextchancehegot.
“Shouldn’tVonettaandtheothers
bereturningtoday?”Iasked,directingKieran’sattentionfromthedraken.
“Anyminutenow.”Pickinguphis
glass,headdeddryly,“Asyoualreadyknow.”
Idid,buthewasnolonger
engagedinanepicstare-downwithReaver,whichwouldsurelyescalate.
However,anxietysuddenlytookflightlikealargesilverhawk,andithadnothing
todowiththeprobabilityofKieranandReavermaimingormurderingeach
other.
Ithadeverythingtodowiththe
plansregardingOakAmblerandSolis.ThingsIwouldneedtoconvincetheAtlantian
generalstosupport,eventhoughIhadn’thandledthemostintricatepartof
thoseplansmyself.
“Ihavethisfeeling,”Kieranbegan,
“thatyou’restillannoyedIadvisedyouagainstgoingwithVonetta.”
Ifrowned.“Sometimes,Ido
wonderifyoucanreadminds.”
Hisfullmouthtwistedintoa
smirkashetappedonefingeroffhistemple.“Ijusthaveaknackforknowing
things.”
“Uh-huh.”Sodidhisfather,
Jasper,butKieranalsofrequentlyseemedtoknowwheremythoughtswent.
Which,admittedly,wasasannoyingtomeasmereadinghisemotionswastohim.
“Iwasn’tactivelyannoyedbyyouadvisingmeagainstgoingintoOak
Ambler,butIamnow.”
“Great,”hemuttered.
Isenthimaglare.“Whyisit
whenaPrinceoraKingdecidestoplacethemselvesindangerorchoosesto
leadarmiesintowar,it’snotanissue?ButwhenaQueenwishestodothe
same,itsuddenlybecomesathingtheymustbeadvisedagainst?Sounds
abit…sexist.”
Kieranplacedhisglassdown.
“It’snotathing.ItriedtostopCasfromdoingidiotic,incredibly
dangerousactssomanytimes,itwaspracticallyafull-timeresponsibility.”
Asharpsliceofpaincutthrough
mychest.IfocusedontheunopenedbottlesofwinetheAtlantianLordwhohad
captainedtheshipwe’dtakentoOakAmblerhadshippedin.Perryhadferried
inmanymuch-neededsupplies.Mostimportantly,thetypeofwineKieran
hadsaidValynfavored.
Whatbetterwaytogetsomeone
toagreetowhatyouwantedthantogetthemliquoredup?
“Namelyyou,”Kierancontinued,
intrudingonmythoughts.“Itriedtostophimfromtakingyou.”
“What?”Myheadjerkedtoward
him.
Henodded.“Whenheconcoctedthe
plantomasqueradeasaguardandtakeyouhostage,Itoldhim,morethanonce,
thatitwasabsolutelyinsane.Thatitcarriedfartoomanyrisks.”
“Didoneofthoseriskshavetodo
withthefactthatitwaswrongtokidnapaninnocentpersonandupendher
entirelife?”Iquestioned.
Hislipspursed.“Can’tsaythat
reallycrossedmymind.”
“Nice.”
“ThatwasbeforeIknewyou.”
“Thatdoesn’tmakeitbetter.”
“Probablynot,butIdon’tthink
youmindhowheupendedyourlife.”
“Well…”Iclearedmythroat.“I
suppose,inaroundabout,reallymessed-upway,I’mgladhedidn’tlistento
you.”
Kieransmirked.“I’msureyouare.”
Irolledmyeyes.“Anyway,
asIwassaying,Idon’tfeelthatit’srighttoasksomethingofsomeonethat
I’mnotwillingtodomyself.”
“Whichisadmirable.Thatwill
winyoutherespectofmanyofyoursoldiers.Toobadyou’lllikelybecaptured
orendupdead.Therefore,makingwhatyoufeelirrelevant.”
“Thatwasabitdramatic,”I
said.“VonettaandtheothersareriskingtheirliveswhileIsithere,
listeningtoyoucomplainaboutwhatI’meating.”
“You’resittingtherelistening
tomecomplainaboutwhatyou’renoteating,”Kierancorrected.“Andnow
it’syouwho’sbeingdramatic.”
“IthinkI’vechangedmymind
aboutyoubeingtheAdvisortotheCrown,”Imuttered.
Thatwasignored.“It’snotlike
you’redoingnothing.”
Therehadbarelybeenamomentwhen
Iwasn’tdoingsomething,especiallysincewe’dtakenMassene.The
Craveninthecellshadbeendealtwith,butIsworeIcouldstillsmellthemif
raincame.Themanorwasinbasicdisrepair,thesecondandthirdfloorsvirtually
uninhabitable.Theonlyelectricityservedahandfulofthechambersandthekitchens.
Thepeople’shomesweren’tmuchbetter,andwe’ddoneourbesttomake
much-neededrepairstoroofsandroadsinthelastfivedays,butitwouldtake
months,ifnotlonger,tofinishit.Thecropshadn’tfaredmuchbetter.
EspeciallywhensomanyofthosewhotendedthemhadbeenledoutsidetheRise.
“Ijust…”Drawingathumbalong
therimoftheglass,Ileanedbackinthechair.Ijustneededtobeoccupied.
IfIweren’t,thenmymindwanderedtoplacesitcouldnotgo.Placesthathad
beenhollowedoutafterthefailedmeetingwiththeBloodQueen.Coldandangry
likeawinterstorm.Andthoseholesinsidemedidn’tfeellikemeat
all.
Orevenlikeamortal.
TheyremindedmeofIsbeth.
Angersimmeredinmygut.I
welcomeditbecauseitwasfareasiertodealwiththatthansorrowand
helplessness.IsbethwassomeoneIhadnoproblemthinkingabout.Notatall.
ShewasallIcouldthinkaboutattimes,especiallyinthosesilent,
darkminutesofnightwhensleepevadedme.
NolongerdidIfindit
difficulttoreconcilethekindnessandgentlenessshe’dshowereduponmewith
whoshehadbeentohimandcountlessothers.Amonster.Ihadcometo
termswithwhoshewas.Isbethmayhaveconceivedmethroughmeansthatwere
mostlikelyunconscionable,butshewasnomothertome.Coralenawas.Isbeth
wasnothingmorethantheBloodQueen.Theenemy.
FeelingKieran’sall-too-knowing
stareuponme,Iswallowedthickly.“I’mokay,”Isaid,beforehecouldaskthe
questionthatoftenpartedhislips.
Kieransaidnothingashe
watchedme.Heknewbetter.Justashe’dknownbetterearlier,whenthaticy
ragehadmanifested,rattlingthetable.However,hedidn’tharponitthis
time.Hechangedthesubject.“Valynandtheothergeneralswillbearrivingany
daynow.HewillapproveofhowwetookMassene.”
Inodded.Valyndidn’tnecessarily
wantwar.Instead,hehadseenitassomethinginevitable.Neitherhenorany
oftheolderAtlantianswerewillingtogivetheAscendedanymorechances.
OncetheylearnedaboutwhattheAscendedherehaddone,itwouldn’thelp
changetheirmindsregardingwhetherornotthevampryscouldorwantedto
changetheirwaysorcontroltheirbloodlust.Anditwouldn’thelpiftheDuke
andDuchessRavarel,thosewhoruledOakAmbler,refusedourdemands.
Shoulderstightening,Istared
intotheglassofdarkwine.Ourdemandshadeverythingtodowith
goingaboutwardifferently.Itwaswhywe’dtakenMassenethewaywehad.Ifully
believedtherewerestepsthatcouldpreventunnecessarylossoflifeonboth
sides,especiallysincethemortalswhofoughtforSolismostlikelyhadno
choice—unlikethosewhohadpickeduptheirswordsandshieldstodefend
Atlantia.
SomeincitieslikeMasseneandOak
Amblerwouldultimatelypaythepriceofaviolentwar,eitherwiththeir
livelihoodsortheirlives.AndthenthereweretheAscendedwhowerelike…
Idrewinaraggedbreath,
brieflysqueezingmyeyesshutbeforemymindcouldcallforthanimageofIan—of
howI’dlastseenhim.Howhediedreplayedenoughatnight.Ididn’tneedto
seeitnow.
ButIbelievedtherehadtobe
Ascendedwhoweren’teviltotheircore.Whocouldbereasonedwith.
Sothatwasthebasisofour
planning.ButweknewOakAmblerwasn’tMassene.
Severaldaysago,we’dsentDuke
andDuchessRavarelanultimatum:Agreetoourdemandsorfaceasiege.Ourdemands
weresimple,butweweren’tcountingonthemtobereasonableandaccepttheir
fate.
AndthatwaswhereVonettacame
in,alongwithNaillandWren,theelderRiseGuardwho’dwitnessedwhatthe
Ascendedherehadbeendoing.Wren’sextendedfamily—onehebelievedmightbe
DescenterswhosupportedAtlantia—livedinOakAmbler.Whattheyweredoing,what
ourplansconsistedof,camewithhugerisks.
However,theimpendingsiegeof
OakAmblerandallthewaysitcouldfailinthemostspectacularwayspossible
weren’touronlypressingconcerns.
Mythoughtsfoundtheirwayto
anotherriskwe’dundertaken:OurpastplanstoenterOakAmbleraheadofwhenwe
weretomeetwiththeBloodQueen.Somehow,shehadknown,eitherhavingsimply
beenpreparedforthepossibilityofusattemptingtotrickthemorbecause
someonehadbetrayedus.Otherthanthosewetrusted,onlytheCouncilof
Eldershadknownaboutourplans.Didwehaveatraitorinourmidst?Either
someonewetrustedorsomeonewhohadreachedtheupperechelonsofpowerin
Atlantia?Orwasthesimplestexplanationtheanswer?ThattheBloodCrownhadsimply
outsmartedus,andwe’dunderestimatedthem?
Ididn’tknow,buttherewas
alsotheissueoftheUnseen—thesecretive,all-maleorganizationthathadonce
servedthedeities.BelievingthatIwastheHarbingerofDeathandDestruction
thattheprophecywarnedof,they’dresurfacedonceIenteredAtlantia.They’d
beenbehindtheattackattheChambersofNyktosandso,somuchmore.Andthe
threattheUnseenposedhadn’tendedwithAlastir’sandJansen’sdeaths.
IwatchedAylard,standing
betweenthepillars.TheUnseenwerestilloutthere,andtherewasnowayof
knowingexactlywhobelongedtothegroupandwhoaidedthem.
“DoIwanttoknowwhatyou’re
thinkingabout?”Kieranasked.“Becauseyoulooklikeyouwishtostabsomeone.”
“YoualwaysthinkIlookthat
way.”
“Probablybecauseyoualways
wanttostabsomeone.”
“Idonot.”Iglancedathim.
Heraisedhisbrows.
“Exceptforrightnow,”Iamended.
“I’mconsideringstabbingyou.”
“Flattered.”Kieranraisedhis
glass,eyeingReaver.Thedrakenslowlyrappedhisclawsonthefloor.“You
oftenseemtowanttostabthoseyoucareabout.”
“Thatmakesitsoundasif
I’m…twistedorsomething.”
“Well…”Kieranloweredhis
glass,narrowinghiseyesatthedraken.“Wouldyoulikemetoposeforapainting?
ThenyoucangazeuponmeevenwhenI’mnotaround.”
Mybrowsflewup.“Canyounot?”
“Hestartedit,”Kieran
muttered.
“How?”
“He’sstaringatme.”Apause.“Again.”
“So?”
“Idon’tlikeit.”Kieran
frowned.“Atall.”
“Yousoundlikeasmallchildright
now,”Iinformedhim,andReaverhuffedoutanotherlaugh.Iturnedtohim.
“Andyou’renotanybetter.”
Reaverrearedbackhisspikedhead,
blowingoutasmokybreath.Helookedaffronted
“You’rebothridiculous.”I
shookmyhead.
“Whatever.”Kieran’sheadturned
totheentrywayatthesamemomentReaver’sdid.“Finally.”
Ilookedover,realizingthat
bothhadheardanother’sapproach.How,asagod,Ihadn’tbeenblessedwith
betterhearingwasbeyondme.
VonettastrodepastAylard,her
longlegsencasedindustybreeches.Shehadhertightandnarrow,waist-length
braidssweptupinaknot,highlightingherhigh,angularcheeks.Exceptfor
herdeeperskintonethatoftenremindedmeoflushnight-bloomingroses,in
hermortalform,shesharedsimilarfeatureswithherbrotherandlookedalot
liketheirmother,Kirha.WhileKieranfavoredtheirfather,Jasper.
AsVonettaapproachedus,Iwondered
whotheirlittlesisterwouldtakeafter.Thebabehadbeenbornonlyafew
weeksago,andIwishedthesiblingswerewiththeirfamilynow,celebrating
thenewestaddition.Butinstead,theywereherewithme,nearlandsravaged
hundredsofyearsago,ontheeveofyetanotherwar.
Vonettawasn’talone.Emil
alwaysseemedtobewherevershewasoflate.
Ibitdownontheinsideofmylip,
stoppingmygrin.Atfirst,Iwasn’tsurethatVonettaappreciatedher
Emil-shapedshadow.ButthatwasuntilI’dseenhercomingoutofhischamber
intheearlymorninghoursonthedayshe’dleftforOakAmbler.Thesoft,sated
smileonherfacemadeitutterlyunnecessarytoprobeanydeeperintoher
emotions.
Vonetta’sstepsfalteredasshe
enteredthebanquethall,takingnoteofReaver.Herbrowslifted.“Howinthe
worlddidyougetinhere?”
“See?”Kieranliftedahand.
“Validquestion.”
Thedrakenthumpedhisheavy
tailonthefloorashehuffedoutabreath.Ihadnoideawhatthatmeant,but
hemadenomovetoapproachVonettaorEmil.
BeforeIcouldspeak,Emil
loweredtoonekneeasheextendedanarmwideinanelaboratebow.“Your
Highness.”
Isighed.Manyhadtakentousing
thattitleinsteadofYourMajestysinceithadbeenusedwhenthegods
wereawake.
Vonettastopped,lookingbehind
her.“Areyougoingtodothateverytime?”
“Probably.”Herose.
“ThatmeansyesinEmil
language,”Vonettaremarkedasmovementbeyondthepillarssnaggedmy
attention.
Aylardnolongerstoodtherenow
thatEmilandVonettawerepresent.Instead,ahunchedfigureI’dbecome
familiarwiththepastfivedaysshuffledpastthepillars.Emilhadtakento
callingherthewidow,eventhoughnooneknewifshehadbeenmarried.I
wasn’texactlysurewhatshehaddoneinthemanor,asIonlyeversawherwalking
about,sometimesintheruinsinthepinesbehindCauldra,whichledtoKieran
beingconvincedthatshewasnotfleshandbloodbutspirit.I’dheardthat
Aylardhadaskedherwhatshewasdoinghereinthemanoronthefirstday,and
heranswerwasonlythatshewaswaiting.
Weird.Butnotimportantatthe
moment.
IturnedtoVonetta.“Has
everyonereturned?Wren?Naill—?”
“I’mfine,”Vonettacutin
smoothlyasshereachedover,brieflytouchingmyhand.Asoftburstofenergy
passedbetweenus.“Everyoneisfineandbackinthecamp.”
Iexhaledslowly,nodding.
“She’sbeenworryingthiswhole
time,hasn’tshe?”Vonettaaskedherbrother.
“Whatdoyouthink?”hereplied.
IalmostkickedKieranunderthe
table.“Ofcourse,Iwasworried.”
“Understandable.Iwould’ve
worriedifitwasyouroamingthestreetsofOakAmbler,lookingforDescenters
andwarningothersoftheimpendingsiegeiftheRavarelsrefusedourdemands.”
Vonettaglanceddownattheplates.“Areyoufinishedwiththat?I’mstarving.”
“Yes.Helpyourself.”Ishot
Kieranalookofwarningwhenheopenedhismouth.Hislipssmashedtogetherin
athin,hardlineashissistersnatchedupasliceofbacon.IglancedatEmil
andthenlookedbackatVonetta.“Howdiditgo?”
“Itwentgood.Ithink.”Vonetta
droppedintothechairoppositeKieran,nibblingonthebacon.“Wespoke
to—gods.Hundreds?Maybeevenmore.Quiteafewofthemwere…”Shefrowned
slightly.“Itwasliketheywerereadytohearthatsomeonewasdoing
somethingabouttheAscended.Theseweren’tliketheoneswhodon’tquestion
theRite,believingitanhonororwhatever.Thesewerepeoplewhodidn’twant
togivetheirchildrenovertotheRite.”
Icouldn’tthinkoftheRiteand
notpicturetheTulisfamily,beggingtheTeermanstospeaktogodswhostill
slumberedontheirbehalf—pleadingtokeeptheirlastchild.
Andnomatterwhathadbeendone
forthem,theentirefamilywasnowdead.
“Youwereright,bytheway.About
tellingthemaboutyou,”sheaddedbetweenbites
“WhatIwould’vepaidtosee
theirreactionstothatnews,”Emilmused.“Tolearnthatnotonlyhadtheir
MaidenmarriedthedreadedAtlantianPrincebutthatshewasnowtheQueenof
Atlantiaandalsoagod.”Afaintsmileappeared.“Ibetmanydroppedtotheir
kneesandstartedpraying.”
“Somedid,”Vonettareported
wryly.
Iwincedalittle.“Really?”
Shenodded.“Andsincethey
believethegodsarestillawake,thenewsthatyoujoinedwithAtlantiagota
lotofthemthinking.Evenafewsaidthegodsmaynolongersupportthe
Ascended.”
Thecurveofmylipsmatched
hers.
“Isupposeweshouldbegrateful
thattheyliedaboutthegodsbackingSolisinsteadofspeakingthetruth—that
thegodshadnothingtodowiththewarandareasleep,”Kierannoted.“Withtheir
lies,theysettheexpectationsofthegodschangingtheiralliances.”
Itoyedwiththeringonmy
pointerfinger.“Itwasn’tmyidea,though.Thatwas…thatwashis.He
recognizedthattheliestheAscendedtoldwouldultimatelybetheirdownfall.”
“Casdidknowthat,”Emil
confirmed.“Butthatwasbeforeheoranyofusknewyouwereagod.Itwas
yourideatorevealthat.Giveyourselfcredit.”
Myneckwarmed,andIclearedmy
throat.“Doyouthinkthey’lllisten?Thattheywilltellothers?”
“Ithinkmanywill.”Vonetta
glancedatherbrotherandthenbackatme.“Weallknowthattellingthe
mortalswhatweplannedwasarisk—onewebelievedwasworthit,evenifthe
Ravarelslearnedofourplans.”
Inodded.“Givingthemortalsa
chancetoleavethecitybeforewetakeitsotheywon’tbecaughtinthe
middleisworththisdangerousmove.”
“Agreed,”sheconfirmed.“So,
somedidn’tbelievethepartaboutyoubeingagod.TheythinktheevilAtlantians
somehowmanipulatedyou,”shesaid,reachingfortheothersliceofbaconas
Emilleanedinanddidthesame.Hewasfaster.“Hey,that’smine.”Sheshot
himaglare.“Whatareyouevendoinghere?”
“Actually,thebaconis—”Kieran
began,andIdidkickhislegunderthetablethistime.Hishead
jerkedinmydirection.
“Wecanshare.”Emilsnappedthe
baconintwoandhandedhalfovertoaless-than-gratefulVonetta.“AndI’m
herebecauseImissedyouthatmuch.”
“Whatever,”Vonettamuttered.
“Seriously,whyareyouhere?”
Emilgrinned,hisambereyeswarm
ashefinishedoffhishalfoftheslice.“I’mherebecausesomeonedelivereda
missivetotheRise,”heannounced,wipinghishandsonanapkin.“It’sfrom
theDukeandDuchessRavarel.”
Everypartofmetensed.“And
you’rejustnowsharingthis?”
“Youhadquestionsabouttheir
timeinOakAmbler.FiguredI’dletthemgetanswered,”hereasoned.“Plus,
Vonettawashungry,andIknowbetterthantogetbetweenawolvenandfood.”
VonettawhippedtowardEmil,
nearlycomingoutofherchair.“Areyouseriouslyblamingyourinabilityto
prioritizeonme?”
“Iwouldneverdosuchathing.”
Emilpulledaslipoffoldedparchmentfromthebreastpocketofhistunicas
hegrinnedatVonetta.“AndnoneofthatchangesthefactthatIdidmissyou.”
Kieranrolledhiseyes.
Vonettaopenedhermouthand
thenclosedit,sittingbackinherchair,andIdidwhatIprobablyshouldn’t.
Iopenedmysenses.WhatItastedfromVonettawasspicyandsmoky.Attraction.
Therewasalsosomethingsweeterunderneath.
“Ineedwine.”Shestartedto
leanforward,butEmilwas,onceagain,quicker.Ashehandedthemissiveto
me,hesnaggedthebottleofwineandpouredheradrink.“Thankyou,”she
said,takingtheglassandswallowinganimpressivemouthful.Shelookedatme.
“So,whatdoesitsay?”
Thethinslipoffolded
parchmentfeltasifitweighedasmuchasasword.IglancedatKieran,and
whenhenodded,Iopenedit.Onesentencewaswritteninredink—aresponsewe
allexpectedbutthatstillcameasablow.
Weagreetonothing.
Chapter4
“Run,Poppy,”Mommawheezed.
“Run.”
Shewantedmetoleaveher,
butIcouldn’t.Iran.Irantowardher,tearsspillingdownmycheeks.
“Momma—”Clawscaughtmy
hair,scratchedmyskin,burningmelikethetimeI’dreachedforthehotkettle.
Iscreamed,strainingforMomma,butIcouldn’tseeherinthemassofmonsters.
Theywereeverywhere,skin
dullandgrayandbroken.Andthentherewasthetallmaninblack.Theone
withnoface.Itwisted,screaming—
Papa’sfriendstoodinthe
doorway.Ireachedforhim.Hewassupposedtohelpus—helpMomma.Buthe
staredatthemaninblackasheroseabovethetwisting,feedingcreatures.
Papa’sfriendjerked,stumblingback,hisbitterhorrorfillingmymouth,
chokingme.Hebackedaway,shakinghisheadandtrembling.Hewasleavingus—
Teethsankintomyskin.
Fierypainrippedthroughmyarmandlitacrossmyface.Ifell,tryingto
shakethemoff.Redstreamedintomyeyes.“No.No.No,”Iscreamed,thrashing.
“Momma!Papa!”
Fireslicedthroughmystomach,
seizingmylungsandmybody.
Thenthemonsterswere
falling,andIcouldn’tbreathe.Thepain.Theweight.Iwantedmymomma.
Nothingnessslippedovermyeyes,andIwaslostforalittlebit.
Ahandtouchedmycheek,my
neck.Iblinkedthroughbloodandtears.
TheDarkOnestoodaboveme,
hisfacenothingbutshadowsbeneaththehoodedcloak.Itwasn’thishandatmy
throatbutsomethingcoldandsharp.
Hedidn’tmove.Thathand
trembled.Heshookashespoke,buthiswordsfadedinandout.
IheardMommasayinavoice
thatsoundedstrangeandwet,“Doyouunderstandwhatthatmeans?Please.She
must…”
“Goodgods,”themanrasped,
andthenIwasfloatinganddrifting,surroundedbythescentoftheflowers
theQueenlikedtohaveinherbedchambers.
Whatapowerfullittleflower
youare.
Whatapowerfulpoppy.
Pickitandwatchitbleed.
Notso—
Ijerkedawake,myeyesopen
wideasIscannedthemoonlitchamber.Iwasn’tthere.Iwasn’tintheinn.I
washere.
Myheartwasslowtocalm.Ihadn’t
hadsuchanightmareinafewnights.Othershadfoundme—oneswherepointed
nailspaintedthecolorofblooddugintohisskin—hurtinghim
Myclosestfriendandlover.
MyhusbandandKing.
Myheartmate.
Thosenightmareshadjoinedthe
oldones,findingmeifImanagedmorethanafewhoursofsleep—whichwasn’t
often.Iaveragedmaybethreehoursanight.
Throatdry,Istaredupatthe
ceiling,carefulnottodisturbthethickblanketspiledontopofthewide
bedroll.Itwassilent.
Ihatedthesemoments.
Thequiet.
Thenothingnessofnight.
Thewaitingwhennothingcould
occupymythoughtsenoughtopreventmefromthinkinghisname—let
alonewhatcouldbehappeningtohim.Fromhearinghimbegandplead,offering
anything,evenhiskingdom,toher.
Twenty-ninedays.
AtremorcoursedthroughmeasI
foughtbacktherisingtideofpanicandanger—
Movementbymyhipjarredme
fromtherapidlyspiralingthoughts.Alarge,furryheadroseagainstthe
moonlight.Thewolvenyawnedashestretchedlong,powerfulfrontlegs.
Kieranhadmadeitahabitof
sleepingnearmeinhiswolvenform,whichwaswhyhegotverylittlesleep.
I’dtoldhimmorethanoncethatitwasn’tnecessary,butthelasttimeI’d
broughtitup,he’dsaid,“ThisiswhereIchoosetobe.”
Andwell,that…thatnearlymade
mecry.Hechosetobebesidemebecausehewasmyfriend.Notbecauseofsome
obligation.Iwouldn’tmakethesamemistakeIhadwithTawny,constantlydoubting
thegenuinenessofourrelationshipbecauseofhowwehadbeenintroduced.
Ialsothoughthechosetobe
here,needingthecloseness,becausehetoowashurting.Kieranhadknownhim
hisentirelife.Theirfriendshipwentbeyondthebondthey’donceshared.
Therewaslovebetweenthem.AndwhileIkeptmysensestomyselfwhentherewas
noneedformetoreadanother’semotions,Kieransatinsilenceattimes,the
sadnessswellingoutfromhimandbreakingthroughmyshields.
Thatsorrowalsostemmedfromthe
lossofLyra.He’dbeenmorethanjustfondofthewolven,eveniftheyhadn’t
beeninaseriousrelationship.He’dcaredforher,andnowshewasgone—just
likethewolvenElashya,theonehehadlovedandlosttoararewasting
disease.
Kieran’sheadturnedtowardme,
andheblinkedsleepy,winter-blueeyes.
“Sorry,”Iwhispered.
Ifeltatouchagainstmymind
likealightbrushofskinagainstskin.Hisimprintremindedmeofcedar,rich
andwoodsy.Youshouldbeasleep,hesaid,hiswordsawhisperamong
mythoughts.
“Iknow,”Ireplied,rolling
ontomysidesoIfacedhim.
Heloweredhisheadtothebed.Another
nightmare?
Inodded.
Therewasapause,andthenhesaid,
Youknow,thereareherbsthatcanhelpyourest.Helpyoufindthekindof
sleepwherethesenightmarescan’treachyou.
“No,thankyou.”I’dneverliked
theideaoftakinganythingthatknockedmeout,potentiallyleavingme
vulnerable.Plus,Iwasalreadytakinganherbsimilartowhathehad
takenforcontraception.I’dfigureditwaswisetoseeifsomethingwas
readilyavailablesincehewouldn’tbeabletotakeanything.Luckily,Vonetta
hadknownjustthething—anherbsimilartotheoneCasteeltook,whichwas
groundintoapowderandcouldbemixedwithanydrink.Ittastedlikedirtbut
stomachingthatwasfarbetterthanthepotentialofcarryingachild.
Thatwasthelastthinganyof
usneeded
ThoughIsuddenlyimagined
Kieranknittinglittlesweatersandgrinned.
Whatareyouthinkingabout?
Hiscuriositywasfreshandlemony.
TherewasnowayIwassharing
that.“Nothing.”
Heeyedmeasifhedidn’t
believeme.Youneedtorest,Poppy.Godornot,you’regoingtowear
yourselfout.
IbitbackasighasItugged
thesoftblankettomychin,rubbingit.“Doyouthinkthisblanketismadeof
wolvenfur?”
Kieran’searsflattened.That
wasapoorattemptatchangingthesubject.
“Ithinkitwasavalid
question,”Iparrotedhisearlierwords.
Youthinkeveryquestionis
avalidone.Hemadeaverymortal-soundinghuff.
“They’renot?”Flippingontomy
back,Istoppedrubbingmychinandletgooftheblanket.
Kierannudgedmyhand.Itwas
hiswayoflettingmeknowitwasokaytotouchhiminthisform—awaythe
wolvensilentlycommunicatedneedforaffection.Ireacheddown,andlike
always,itneverceasedtoamazemehowsoftawolven’sfurwas.Iranmy
fingersthroughthefluffbetweenhisears,thinkingKieranprobablybelieved
heenjoyedthetouchmorethanIdid.Buttouch…touchwassuchagift.Oneso
veryoftenoverlookedandunderappreciated.
Severallongmomentsofsilencepassed.
“Doyou…doyoudreamofhim?”
Idon’t.Kieranlowered
hisheadtomyhip.Hiseyesclosed.AndIdon’tknowifthat’sablessing
ornot.
Ihadn’tbeenabletofallbackasleeplikeKieranhad,
butIwaiteduntilthefainttracesoflightcreptthroughthewindowand
acrosstheceilingtoleavethebed.Kieranalwayssleptthedeepestasthesun
rose.Iwasn’tsurewhy,butIknewthatmyabsencewouldn’tstirhimforat
leastanhourortwo.
Paddingquietlyacrossthestone
floor,Isecuredthewolvendaggertomythighandthenpickeduptheruffled,
bluedressrobeKieranhadfoundinoneoftheotherchambers.Islippediton
overtheslipandtightsI’dsleptin.Itsmelledofmothballs,butitwas
cleanandluxuriouslysoft,madeofsomesortofcashmere.Tyingthesashatmy
waist,Ileftthechamberwithoutbotheringwithshoes.Thethicksocksweremore
thanenoughsinceIdidn’tplantoleavethemanorthisearly.
ThepeopleofMassenewouldbe
movingaboutatthistime,meetingatoneofthetwoshopsthatsatjustbeyond
theinteriorwallofthemanor,gettingbakedpastriesandroastedcoffeebefore
leavingtoworktheircrops.Ididn’twanttodisturbwhatlittletimetheyhad
totalktooneanother,repairingtheirbrokencommunity.Thepeopleherewere
onlyslowlyadjustingtoourpresence—theAtlantianCrestsonbannersdrapedin
thehallsInowwalkedpastandhangingovertheRise.Theywerestillnervous
aroundtheAtlantiansoldiersandoftenstaredatthewolven,caughtbetweenterror
andcuriosity.AndwhenReavertookflight…
Chaosensued.
Atleastthescreamsandthe
runningfortheirliveshadabated.Butwhentheycaughtsightofme,they
frozebeforehastilybowingorloweringthemselvestotheirknees,wide-eyed
andfilledwiththesameconflictingemotionstheyfeltwhenthewolvendrew
closer.
IhadafeelingthatWrenhad
keyedthepeopleofMasseneintomywholegodhoodthingsincetherewasnoway
anyonefromOakAmblercould’vecommunicatedwhathadbeenwhisperedtothe
peoplethere.WhileIwasn’tupsetwithhimfordoingso,Isortofwishedhehadn’t.
Howtheystaredmadethingsa
bitawkward.
Thewaytheyhastilybowedasif
expectinggravepunishmentforfailingtodosoimmediatelymademesad.
Travelingtheempty,winding
hallsofthemainfloor,Ibypassedthebanquethallwherethemurmurofeither
soldiersorwolvendriftedout.Icontinued,passingthelonereceivingchamber
andmovingtothecloseddoorsontheeastsideofthemanor—whichappearedto
betheoldestpart.
Crackingthemopen,Ientered
thecold,cavernouschamber.Themustyscentofoldbooksanddustgreetedme.
TherewassomuchdustthatneitherKierannorVonettacouldbeinthechamber
forlongwithoutexperiencingasneezingfit.Istopped,turningonthegas
lampthatsatonateatablebesideawornsetteetheshadeofrichchocolate.
CauldraManorwasasoldas
Massenewas,likelybuiltwhenthecitywasadistrictofPompay—muchlikethe
still-existingneighborhoodsinCarsodonia.Ihadafeelingthatmanyofthe
tomesontheshelvesherewerejustasold.
Mainlybecausethreeorfourhad
basicallyfallenapartwhenIopenedthem.
Itwas,admittedly,acreepy
chamberwithitsheavytapestriesblockinganynaturalsourcesoflight,the
fadedportraitsofwhoIassumedwereeitherAscendedofthepastorperhaps
mortalswho’doncecalledCauldrahome,andthearrayofhalf-meltedcandlesof
variousshapesandcolors.
ButIbegantothinkthatwhat
trulykeptthewolvenandAtlantiansawaywasthefeelinginhere.The
distinctsensationofnotbeingalone,evenwhenyouwere.
IfeltitnowasIdriftedamong
therowsoftomesandtheirdustyspines—thepressofinvisiblefingersacross
thenapeofmyneck.Isuppressedashiver,withdrawinganotherancientbook
fromtheshelfasIquicklyglancedaroundtheemptychamber.Thefeeling
remained,butIignoreditasItookthebooktothesetteeandsat.
However,Iwouldtakethepossibility
ofbeingstalkedbyspiritsoverlyinginbedwithonlymywandering
thoughts—worryingabouthim,andTawny,whetherornotIwouldneedto
feed,andifwecouldtrulywinthiswarwithoutleavingtherealmworsethan
whatitwas.
Icarefullycrackedopenthe
tome.NoAtlantianswerelistedasfarasIcouldtell,thoughmuchoftheink
hadfaded.Still,whatIcouldreadoftheparagraphsnarratingthelivesof
thosewho’dlivedhereagesagowasfascinating.Thebirthsanddeathshadbeen
notedintwocolumns,groupedtogetherbysurname.Mixedinwithannouncements
ofmarriageswerepaltryargumentsoverpropertylines,accusationsoflivestock
thievery,andmuchmoreheinouscrimeslikeassaultandmurder.Executionswere
recorded.Themannerofdeathwasalmostalwaysbrutal,andtheywereheld
publiclyinwhathadoncebeenatownsquare.
Apartofmerealizedthatwhat
haddrawnmetolookthroughtheserecords,longforgottenalongthelower
shelvesofthelibrary,wasthattheyremindedmeofwhenIwasinNewHaven.
WheneverythingIhadbeenlearninghadbeensoveryconfusingtome.But…buthe
hadbeenthere,vibrantandteasingasIdiscoveredthedifferentAtlantian
bloodlines.
Chestsqueezing,Iflipped
throughstiff,yellowedpageschroniclingarealmthat’dexistedlongbefore
theAscended.Longbefore—
Myeyesnarrowedonthewordsbefore
me.Whatthe…?Liftingthebookfrommylap,IinhaledwaytoomuchdustasI
readthepassageagainandthenonemoretime.
PrincessKayleigh,first
daughterofKingSaegarandQueenGenevaofIrelone,joinedQueenEzmeriaof
LasaniaandherConsort,Marisol,tocelebratetheRiteandAscensionofthe
Chosen,markingthe…
Therestoftheinkwasfartoo
fadedformetoread,butthreewordspracticallypulsedfromthewornpage.
Rite.Ascension.Chosen.
Threethingsthathadn’texisted
beforetheAscendedruledSolis.
Butthathadtobeimpossible.He
hadexplainedthattheAscendedhadcreatedtheRiteasameanstoincrease
theirnumbersandtomakelivestockoutofmortals.Excepttheydidn’tfeed
fromallthirdsonsanddaughters.Somecarriedanunknowntrait,whichIsbeth
haddiscoveredallowedthemtobemadeintothosethings—aRevenant.Still,it
madenosenseforaRitetobementionedinatimesofarinthepastwherethe
namesofthekingdomshadbeennearlyforgotten.AtimeofnoAscended.
Mygazeliftedtooneofthe
fadedportraits.AtimepossiblyevenbeforethefirstAtlantianhadbeencreated
throughtheheartmatetrials?Settingthebookaside,thehemofthedressing
robewhisperedoverthefloorasIhurriedbacktotheshelves,searchingfor
olderrecords—thetomeswhichappearedclosetodisintegrating.Takingonein
myhands,IwasevenmorecarefulasIopenedthebookandwentthroughthe
pages,searchingforanymentionoftheRite—anddates.
Ifoundit—apassagewithjustenough
inklefttomakeoutareferencetotheChosen,butIwasevenmoreconfused.
BecausewhenIcross-checkedthebirthsintheotherledger,onlythethird
sonsanddaughtersbornofthesamefamilyhadnodeathdates—datesonlymarked
bythemonth,day,andtheage.Iwaspositivethatwasn’tduetofadedink.
“HowwastheRitepossible,
then?”Iaskedtheemptychamber.
TheonlyanswerwasiftheRite
hadexistedandthenhadstopped,somehowbeingforgottenbythetimethefirst
Atlantianwasborn.Thatwastheonlyexplanation,asIknewhecouldn’t
haveliedaboutthis.EveryAtlantianandwolvenI’dmetbelievedthattheRite
hadbegunwiththeAscended.
AsIstaredattheledger,it
struckmethattheserecordscouldbefar,farolderthanIbelieved.Possibly
writtenduringatimewhenthegodswereawake
Mylipsparted.“Theseledgers
havetobe—”
“Olderthansinandmostkin.”
Ijerkedattheraspyvoice,my
gazeswingingtothehalf-opendoors.Ashivercourseddownmyspineatthe
sightofthehunchedfigureshroudedinblack.
Itwasher.Theoldwoman.The
widow…whomightnotevenbeawidow.
“Butnotasoldasthefirst
mortal,birthedfromthefleshofaPrimalandthefireofadraken.”
Ijoltedagain.Wasthathowthe
firstmortalhadbeencreated?
Theveiledheadcockedtothe
side.“Istartledyou,Isee.”
Iswallowed.“Alittle.Ididn’t
hearyouenter.”
“I’masquietasaflea,somost
don’thearme,”shesaid,shufflingforward.Itensed.Thelongsleevesofher
robecoveredherhands,andasshedrewcloser,Imadeoutthebaresthintof
pale,creasedskinbeneaththelacyveil.“Strangereadingforatimewhenmost
aresleeping.”
Blinking,Iglanceddownatthe
ledger.“Isupposeitis.”Ilookedbackather,surprisedthatshehadmoved
soclosesoquickly.“Doyouknowexactlyhowoldtheseledgersare?”
“Olderthanthekingdomandmost
wisdom,”sheansweredinthatbrittlevoicethatremindedmeofdrybranches.
Theoldwomanswayedslightly,
andIrememberedmymanners.Mostwouldn’tsitbeforeaQueenunlessgivenpermission.
Iimaginedmortalswouldbehavethesameinthepresenceofagod.“Wouldyou
liketosit?”Iasked.
“IfIsit,I’mafraidtoadmit,
I’mlikelynevertogetupagain.”
Basedonhowtherobesbarely
movedtoshowwhethershewasbreathing,Iwasalsoafraidofthat.“Idon’t
knowyourname.”
“Iknowwhoyouare,withthat
glowinyoureyesasbrightasastar,”shereplied,andIdideverythinginmy
powertokeepmyfaceblank.“VessaiswhatIwasoncecalled.”
Oncecalled?Iresistedtheurge
toreachoutandtouchher,toseeifshetrulywasmadeoffleshandbone.
Instead,Iopenedmysensestoher,andwhatIfeltwas…strange.Itwasmurky.
Asifwhatevershefeltwascloudedsomehow.Buttherewerefainttracesof
sugaryamusement,whichwasalsoodd.Iwonderedifheragemadereadingher
hazy.
Ihadafeelingshewaslikely
theoldestmortalI’devermet—possiblyeventhatexisted.Butheragemeant
thatshemusthaveseenalotofwhat’doccurredinMassene.Alotofwhatthe
Ascendedhaddone.
“Whatdidyoudohere,Vessa?”
Thelaceinfrontofherface
rippledgently,andIcaughtthescentofsomethingvaguelyfamiliar.Astalescent
Icouldn’tquiteplaceasshesaid,“Iserved,”shesaid.“Iservestill.”
FiguringthatshemeanttheAscended,
Itampeddownthesurgeofangerthatrose.TheRoyalswereallthemortals
knew.Andlivingforaslongasshehadundertheirrule,thefearofbeing
seenasdisloyal—asaDescenter—wouldbehardtoshake.
Iforcedasmile.“Younolonger
havetoservetheAscended.”
Vessawassounbelievablystill.
“IdonotservethemwhileIwait.”
“Thenwhoisityouserve?”I
asked.
“WhoelsebuttheTrueCrownof
theRealms,sillygirl?”
“Iamneithersillynoragirl,”
Isaidcoolly,settingtheledgerontheteatable,assumingshereferencedthe
BloodCrown.
VessagaveashakybowIfeared
wouldtoppleher.“Myapologies,YourHighness.I’velostallsenseofcoyness
withage.”
Isaidnothingforalong
moment,lettingtheinsultrolloffme.I’dbeencalledfarworseanddealt
harsherinsults.“HowisitthatyouservetheTrueCrown,Vessa?”
“Bywaiting.”
Betweenthetoo-shortanswers
andthelonger,rhymingones,Iwasquicklylosingmypatience.“Whatisit
thatyouwaitfor?”
Shestraightenedinshort,jerky
movements.“TheonewhowasBlessed.”
Istiffened.
“Onebornfromagravemisdeed,
ofagreatandterriblePrimalpower,withbloodfullofashandice.”Her
wordsrattledherentirebody,raisingthetinyhairsallovermine.“The
Chosenwhowillusherintheend,remakingtherealms.TheHarbingerofDeath
andDestruction.”
Isuckedinasharpbreathat
theall-too-familiarwordsoftheprophecy.Shemust’veheardthemfromtheDuke.
Itwastheonlyexplanation.
“You.”Thehemofthe
lacyveilfluttered.“Iwaitforyou.Iwaitfordeath.”
Icyfingerspressedagainstthe
backofmyneckoncemoreasifaspirithadtouchedmethere.
Theoldwomanlurchedforward,
blackrobesflappinglikethewingsofacrowasanarmwhippedoutfromthe
vastfolds.Aglimpseofsilverglintedinthelamplight.Ilockedupforthe
briefestsecondaspotent,acuteshocksweptthroughme.
Isnappedoutofit,the
dressingrobeflutteringaroundmylegsasIshottomyfeet.Icaughther
wrist,myfingersinkingthroughtheheavyclothandaroundthethin,bonyarm.
“Areyouserious?”Iexclaimed,
stillcaughtinshockasIshovedaway.
Vessastumbledback,bumping
intotheteatable.Shewentdownhard,herheadsnappingforward.Theveil
slippedandthenfelltothefloor.White,wispyhairspilledoutfrompatchy
clumpsalongawrinkledscalp.
“Didyoujusttrytostabme?”
Incredulous,Istareddownather,myheartthumpingheavily.“Whenyouknowwhat
Iam?”
“Iknowwhatyouare.”She
plantedapale,skeletalhandagainstthefloorandliftedherhead.
Goodgods,shetrulywasold
Herfacewasalmostnothingmore
thanskinandskull,hercheeksandeyessunkenin,herfleshheavilylined,
creased,andaghastly,grayish-white.Lipsabloodless,thinlinepeeledback
acrossstainedteeth,andhereyes…Theyweremilkywhite.Itookaninvoluntary
stepback.Howintheworldcouldsheevenseeme?
Butshestillclutchedthe
slenderdagger,andthatwasratherimpressiveconsideringherextreme,
advancedage.
“Harbinger,”shecroonedsoftly.
“Youshouldstaydown,”I
warned,reallyhopingshelistened.Somethingwasobviouslyverywrongwith
her—perhapsduetohearingthatdamnprophecyandthefearthatfestered
becauseofit.Or,thisbehaviorcouldbeabyproductofherage.Probably
both.Eitherway,Ididn’twanttoharmanoldlady.
Vessaheavedherselfuptoher
feet.
“Oh,comeon,”Imuttered.
Shelungedatmethistime,
fasterthanIexpected.Gods,thefactthatshe’dgottenupatallwas,yet
again,impressive.
Ieasilyside-steppedher.Thistime,
IgraspedbothherarmsascarefullyasIcould.Tryingnottothinkofhow
brittleherbonesfelt,Ipushedherdown,thistimeontothesettee.
“Dropthedagger,”Isaid.
“Harbinger.”
“Now.”
“Harbinger!”Vessayelled.
“Godsdamnit.”Iputtheslightest
pressureonthebonesofherwrist,wincingasshegasped.Herfingersopened,
andthedaggerfelltothefloorwithathud.Shestartedtopushup.“Don’t
eventhinkit.”
“DoIevenwanttoknowwhatis
happeninginhere?”Kieranboomedfromthedoors.
“Nothing.”Iglancedathim.
Clearly,he’djustrisen.Heworeonlybreeches.“Exceptthatshejusttriedto
stabme.”
EverylineofKieran’sbodywent
taut.“Thatdoesn’tsoundlikenothing.”
“Harbinger!”Vessashrieked,and
Kieranblinked.“Harbinger!”
“Andincaseyoucan’ttell,she
believesI’mtheHarbinger.”Ilookeddownattheoldwoman,halfafraidtolet
hergo.“Nomatterwhatyou’veheardorweretold,Iamnotthat.”
“Youwerebornintheshroudof
thePrimals,”shescreamed,anditwasloud.“Blessedwithbloodfull
ofashandice.Chosen.”
“Idon’tthinksheheardyou,”
Kieranreplieddryly.
Ishothimaglare.“Wouldyou
liketohelp,ordoyoujustwanttostandthereandwatchmegetyelledatby
anoldwoman?”
“Isthereathirdoption?”
Myeyesnarrowed.
“Harbinger!”Vessashouted.
“HarbingerofDeathandDestruction!”
Kierantwistedatthewaist.
“Naill!Needyourhelp.”
“Youcouldjustcomeandget
her,”Isaid.“Youdidn’tneedtocallhim.”
“Hell,no.I’mnotgetting
anywherenearher.She’salaruea.”
“Awhat?”
“Aspirit.”
“You’vegottobekiddingme,”I
mutteredasVessacontinuedstruggling.“Doessheseemlikeadisembodiedphantom
toyou?”
Naillentered,hisstepsslowing
andhisbrowsliftingasVessacontinuedscreaming.Emilwasrightbehindhim,
hisheadtiltingtotheside.“Oh,hey,”hesaid.“It’sthewidow.”
“HernameisVessa,andshejust
triedtostabme,”Ibitout.“Twice.”
“Wasnotexpectingthat,”Naill
murmured.
“Idon’twanttohurther,”I
said.“So,itwouldbegreatifyoutwocouldtakehersomeplacesafe.”
“Someplacesafe?”Emilquestioned
asheandNaillcameforward,speakingloudlytobeheardoverthewoman’s
screams.“Youjustsaidshetriedtostabyou.”
“Youseehowoldsheis?”I
leanedbackasspittleflewfromthewoman’smouthasshecontinuedshrieking.
“Sheneedstobeputsomeplacewhereshecan’thurtherselforothers.”
“Likeacell?”Kieransuggested
asthetwoAtlantiansmanagedtodisentangleus.“Oratomb?”
IignoredthatasIbent,picking
upthedagger.“Placeherinabedchamberthatlocksfromtheoutsideuntilyou
canfigureoutwhichoftheroomsishers.”
“Willdo,”Naillsaid,guiding
thenow-wailingwomanfromthelibrary.
“Doyouthinkthere’sanyextra
muzzleslyingabout?”EmilaskedasKieransteppedback,givingthemawide
berth.
Iturned.“Don’tyoudareputa
muzzleonher.”Therewasnoanswer,soItwistedtoKieran.“Theywouldn’t,
wouldthey?”
Hecameforward,hisgaze
sweepingoverme.“Sheshouldbeinacell.”
“She’stoooldforthat.”
“Andyoushouldn’tberoaming
around.Obviously.”
Itossedthedaggerontothe
table.“Icantakecareofmyself,Kieran.”Idraggedmyhandovermyshoulder,
pushingmybraidback.“Shemust’veheardtheDukespeakingabouttheprophecy,
anditmessedwithher.”
“Noone’squestioningyour
abilitytohandleyourself,butthere’snotellinghowmanyothershaveheard
abouttheprophecy.”
Maybethatwaswhythepeople
seemedsoafraidaroundme.
“Thisiswhyyoushouldhave
CrownGuardswithyou.”
“Itoldyou,Hisa,andeveryone
elsewhosuggestedthat,thatIdon’twantaguardfollowingmearound.It
remindsme…”Itrailedoff,tensing.ItremindedmetoomuchofVikter.Of
Rylan.Ofhim.“ItremindsmeofwhenIwastheMaiden,”Ilied.
“Icanunderstandthat.”Kieran
stoppedbesideme,soclosehischestbrushedmyarmashebenthishead.“But
sendinghertoabedchamber?YouareaQueen,andthatwomanjusttriedtostab
you.DoyouknowwhatmostQueenswoulddoinresponse?”
“Iwouldhopethatmostwoulddo
asIdid—recognizethatsheismoreofaharmtoherselfthananyoneelse,”Icountered.
Hisstarehardened.“Youshould
atleastexileher.”
“IfIdidthat,itwouldbea
deathsentence.”Ifloppeddownonthesettee,surpriseditdidn’tcollapse
underme.“Yousawhowoldsheis.Idoubtshe’llbeanissueformuchlonger.
Leaveherbe,Kieran.Youwouldn’tfeelthiswayifshe’dgoneaftersomeone
else.”
Hedidn’tacknowledgehowright
Iwas,whichwasannoying.“Isthatanorder?”
Irolledmyeyes.“Yes.”
“Asyouradvisor—”
“Youwillsay,‘My,whata
kindQueenourpeoplehave.’”
“Youarekind.Tookind.”
Shakingmyhead,Ilookedatthe
recordsontheteatableasIshovedthoughtsoftheoldwomanaside.“Doyou
knowhowthefirstmortalwascreated?”
“That’sarandom,unexpected
question.”Hecrossedhisarmsbutdidn’tsit.“Thefirstmortalwascreated
fromtheflesh—”
“OfaPrimalandthefireofa
draken?”Ifinishedforhim,surprisedthatthewidowhadspokenthetruth.
Kieranfrowned.“Ifyouknowthe
answer,whydidyouask?”
“Ididn’tknowuntilnow.”It
didn’tpassmebythatIwascalledtheQueenofFleshandFire,butmybrain
wasalreadytoofullofconfusingthingstoconsiderhoworifthosetwoitems
wererelated.“DidyouknowthattheRiteexistedbeforetheAscended?”
“Itdidn’t.”
“Itdid,”Isaidandthenshowed
himtheledgers.
Kieran’ssurprisewaslikea
splashofcoolwaterashedraggedahandoverhishead.Thehairtherewas
growinglonger.“Iguessit’spossiblethatthegodshadsomesortofRiteand
thattheAscendedcopiedit.”
Ithoughtthatover.“Malecwould’ve
knownaboutit.Hecould’vetoldIsbeth.Butdiditstopbecausethegodswent
tosleep?”
“Thatwouldbeaplausible
reason.”Hefoldedhisarms,givingthechamberanot-too-discreetglance.
“Ithastoberelated—whythe
godstookthethirdsonsanddaughters,”Isaid,staringattheledgers.“And
howtheycanbecomeRevenants.”
Chapter5
Anhourorsopastdawnthe
followingmorning,Iwalkedacrossthevine-smotheredremainsofoneofthe
buildingssituatedamongthepinesthatcrowdedCauldraManor.Agustof
chilledwindsweptthroughthedecayingpillars,rufflingthepurewhitefurof
thewolvenprowlingthelengthofthecrumblingwallofthestructure.
DelanohadfollowedwhenIleft
themanor,stayingonlyafewfeetbehindmeashecontinuouslyscannedthe
ruinsthathadeitherbeendestroyedbytimeorthelastwar.
Thirtydays.
Theshudderrollingthroughmehad
nothingtodowiththecooltemperatures.Thesharpswellofpaindeepinmy
chestmadeitdifficulttobreatheandblendedwiththenearlyoverwhelming
needtoescapethishauntedplaceandgotoCarsodonia.Thatwaswherehe
was.ThatwaswhattheHandmaidenhadtoldme,andIdidn’tthinktheRevenant
waslying.HowcouldIfreehimifIwerehere,trappedamidtheskeletonsofa
once-greatcity?HeldcaptivebytheresponsibilitiesofaCrownIhadn’t
wanted?
Myglovedfingerstraileddownthe
buttonsofthewoolensweatercoattowheretheyendedatthewaist.Ireached
betweentheflaredhalvesandclosedmyhandoverthepouchsecuredtomyhip,
clutchingthetoyhorse.
Mythoughtscalmed.
Nearthebushy,yellow
wildflowersgrowingalongthefoundation,Isatontheedge,lettingmylegs
dangleoffasIeyedthelandscape.Waist-highweedshadreclaimedmostofthe
roadthathadoncetraveledtothispartofthecity,leavingonlyglimpsesof
thecobbledstreetsbeneath.Thickrootshadtakenholdamongthetoppled
buildings,andthesweepingpines’heavylimbsclimbedthroughbrokenwindows
inthefewwallsthatstillstood.Sprigsoflavenderpokedthroughabandonedcarriage
wheels,thesweet,floralscentfollowingthewindwheneveritblew.
IhadnoideahowoldDuke
Silvanhadbeen,butIwassurehe’dlivedenoughyearstocleanthispartof
Masseneup.Todosomethingwiththelandsoitnolongerresembledagraveyard
ofwhatoncehadbeen.
TheChosenwhowillusherin
theend,remakingtherealms.
Ashiveraccompaniedthememory
ofVessa’swords.AsfarasIknew,neitherNaillnorEmilhadbeenableto
findherchamber,butshewaslockedaway,fedandsafeinaroomtwodoors
downfromtheGreatHall.
“Youshouldn’tbeouthere,”a
gruffvoicesaidfromabove,causingmetojump.
Delanohadn’tbeentheonlyoneto
follow.Reaverhad,too,takingtotheairashetrackedusthroughthepines.
HeglidedsoquietlyaboveusthatI’dforgottenhewasupthere,circling.
Thevoicecouldbelongtonoone
buthim
Tiltingbackmyhead,Ilooked
upadozenfeetorsotowherethedrakenperchedontheflatsurfaceofa
pillar.Warmthcreptintomycheeks.
SeeingReaverinhismortalform
wasalreadyanutterlyunexpectedexperience.Butseeinghimcompletely,
absolutelynakedwhilstcrouchedonapillartooktheoddnessofthesituation
toawholenewlevel.
Reaverwasa…blond
Withhissomewhatgrumpy
disposition,I’dconjuredupamuchdarker-hairedimageofhim.
Itriednottostare,butitwas
hardnotto.Luckily,anyareasthatwould’vebeenconsideredhighlyinappropriate
bymostwerehiddenfromview,givenhowhewaspositioned.Still,therewasa
lotofexposed,sinewy,sand-coloredflesh.Isquinted.Skinthatcarriedthe
faintbutdistinctpatternofscales.
“You’reinyourmortalform,”I
saiddumbly.
Acurtainofshoulder-lengthhair
obscuredmostofReaver’sfeaturesexceptfortheangleofhissharpjawline.
“Howobservant.”
MybrowsroseasIfeltDelano
brushagainstmythoughts,hisimprintspringyandfeatherlight.Followingthat
uniquesensation,Iopenedthepathwaytohim,andhisresponsewasimmediate.He
isanoddone
Icouldn’treallyargueagainst
thatatthemoment.Heprobablythinkswe’reodd.
Heprobablywantstoeatus,
Delanorepliedasheslidpastoneofthepillars.
Ialmostlaughed,butthen
Reaversaid,“Youarefilledwithworry.Wecanallfeelit.Eventhoseon
theirwayhere.”
Myattentionjerkedbacktohim.
WeAsinthedraken.Thewolvencouldsensemyemotionswhen
extremelyheightenedbecauseofthePrimalnotam.“Arethedraken
bondedtome?”IaskedsinceNektashadn’texactlysaidtheywere.Justthat
theywerenowmine
“YouaretheLiessa.
Yousummonedus.YoucarrythebloodofNyktosandtheConsortinyou.You
are…”Hetrailedoff.“Yes,wearebondedtoyou.Iamperplexedbythefactthat
you’reonlynowrealizingthat.”
Thecornersofmylipsturned
down.“I’mnotjustfiguringitout.Ihadn’treallythoughtthat…deeplyabout
it,”Ifinishedlamely.“CanIcommunicatewithyoulikeIdowiththewolven?”
“No,butasyouknow,”hesaid,
andIblinkedslowly,“wewillknowandansweryourwill,asithas
alwaysbeenthatwaywiththePrimals.”
“ButI’mnotaPrimal.”
“Whatyouareisnotwise,”heresponded,
andnowIreallyfrowned.“Youshouldn’tbethisfarfromthemanor.”
“I’mnotfar.”Icouldstill
smellthewoodsmokeminglingwiththelavender
“Thesemortalsareafraidof
you,asyoualreadyknow,”hecontinued,andmystomachtwisted.“Feartendsto
leadtopoorchoices.”
“Iwon’tletanyonegetclose
enoughtodomeanyharm,”Isaid.“NeitherwillDelano.”
“Onedoesnotneedtobenear
youtoharmyou,”hepointedout.“Asyouweretoldbefore,youmaybehardto
kill,butit’snotimpossible.Thatwomanmaynothavesucceeded,butothers
couldinflictdamage.”
Myfingersstoppedtheir
ceaselesstoyingwiththesweater’sbuttonsaswindtossedstrandsofhairback
fromReaver’sface.Ifinallygotmyfirsttruelookathim.
Therewasastrangeasymmetricquality
tohimasifhisfeatureshadbeenpluckedfromrandomtraits.Hiseyeswere
widesetandtilteddownattheinnercorners,givinghimasomewhatmischievous
impressionthatdidn’tmatchthesombernessofhisvividsapphirestare.Nor
didthefull,distinctivelybow-shapedlipsseemtobelongtothestrong,
chiseledjawandlightbrownbrowsthatarchedinasardonic,almosttaunting
way.Hischeekboneswerehighandsharp,creatingshadowsbelowthem.Somehow,
thehodgepodgeoffeaturesworked.Hewasn’tclassicallyhandsomebutso
interestingtolookuponthathewasthoroughlystriking.Hehadahintof
gauntnesstohisfacethatmademewonderifhewasstillrecoveringphysically
fromsuchalongsleep.
Ipulledmyselfoutofthose
thoughtswithashakeofmyhead.“Exactlywhatdoeskillagod?”
“Agodcankillanother,”Reaver
said.“Shadowstonecanalsokillagod.”
Thesamematerialhadbeenusedto
constructmanyoftheTemplesandthepalaceinEvaemon.I’dneverthoughtofit
asaweaponuntilthoseskeletalguardswe’dseenafterenteringIliseeumhad
wieldedshadowstoneweapons.
ItwaswhathadpuncturedTawny’s
skininthechaosaftereverythinghadgonesoterriblywrong.
“Throughtheheartorhead,”he
elaborated.
Immediately,Isawthearrowthe
Revenanthadpointedinmydirection,buttheRevenanthadspokenasifshe
hadn’tbelievedtheshadowstonewouldkillme.Isupposeditwasagoodthing
she’dobviouslythoughtwrong.
“Whathappensifamortalis
stabbedwithshadowstone?”
“Itwouldkillthem,”hesaid,
andairfledmylungs.“Butyourfriendlives.Therehastobeareasonfor
that.”
Reaverhaddefinitelybeen
listeningwheneverIspokeofTawny.“Whatkindofreasoncouldtherebe?”
“Iwouldn’tknow,”hereplied,
andItampeddownasurgeoffrustration.“Butyouarethefirstfemale
descendantofthePrimalofLife—themostpowerfulbeingknown.Intime,you
willbecomeevenmorepowerfulthanyourfather.”
HowIcouldbemorepowerful
thanmyfatherwasbeyondme.NordidIknowwhythefemalepartmattered.
Still,Igotstuckonthosetwowords.
Yourfather.
Ires.
Thosetwowordsleftmeuncertain.
Iswallowed,lookingaway.WhateverreliefI’dfeltwhenIlearnedthatMalec
wasn’tmyfatherhadbeenshort-lived.MyfatherwasacavecatI’dseenasa
youngchildandagaininOakAmbler,atCastleRedrock.ButtheonlyfatherI
rememberedwasLeopold.Still,angerhummedthroughmyblood,minglingwiththe
eatherandwarmingthosecold,hollowplacesscatteredthroughout.Iwouldfree
him,too.“HowlonghasIresbeenheldcaptive?”
“HeleftIliseeumwhilewe
slept,afterwakingoneofthedrakentoaccompanyhim.”ThelineofReaver’s
jawflexedashestaredahead.“Idon’tknowwhyheleftorexactlywhen.Ionly
becameawaresomeeighteenyearsagowhenthePrimalawakened.”
MybrowsknittedasDelanosank
ontohishaunchesbesideme.“WhydidNyktosawaken?”
Reaver’sheadswunginmy
direction.Thoseultra-brighteyeswereunnervingevenwiththedistancebetween
us.“Ibelieveitwaswhenyouwereborn.Itwasfelt.”
Ihadn’tknownthat.
Hereturnedhisgazetothesky.
“ThatwaswhenwelearnedthatbothMalecandIresweregone.Aswas…Jade.”
Ittookmeamomenttorealize
thathespokeofJadis—Nektas’sdaughter.
Tensionbunchedthemuscles
alonghisshoulders.“Idon’tknowwhyIrestookher.Shewasyoungwhenwe
wenttosleep.Andwhenshewasawakened,shewould’vebeenuntested.It
wouldn’thavebeensafeforher.”
Ifeltthestrangeurgetodefend
amanIdidn’tknow.“Maybehedidn’tthinkitwouldbedangerous.”
Reaverhuffed,andIsworeIsaw
faintwispsofsmokecomingfromhismouth.“Ithink…Ithinkheknewsomething
hadhappenedtohisbrotherandwenttolookforhim.Malecwaslosttouslong
beforewerealized,”hesaid,hiswordssimilartowhatNektashadtoldme.
“ButMalecwasIres’stwin.Soalikeaschildren,youcouldn’ttellthemapart.
Astheygrewolder,theirdifferencesbecameclear,”hesaid,hisrough,unused
voiceturningdistant.“Ireswascautiousandthoughtfulineverything,while
Malecwasrecklessanddidn’toftenstoptothinkofwhathe’ddoneuntilafterward.
IreswascontentinIliseeum,butMalechadgrownrestless,visitingthemortal
worldasthedeitiesslowlybuiltAtlantia.BecausebothheandIreswerein
bornthisrealm,hecouldcome,butthatwasnotwithoutitslimitations.The
longerhestayed,themorehispowerlessened.Still,hechosetostay,even
knowingwhathewouldhavetodotostaystrong.”
Thatlesseningofhispowermust
explainwhynoPrimalnotamexistedbetweenMalecandallthewolvenlike
theyhadwithme.“Howdidhestaystrong?”
“Hehadtofeed,Liessa.”
OneeyebrowroseasReaverlookeddownatme.“Hehadtofeedoften.
AnybloodwoulddoforagodoraPrimal,whetheritbemortal,Atlantian,or
anothergod.”Apause.“Wolven.Anythingbutadraken.Youcannotfeedfroma
draken.”
SurpriserolledthroughDelano
andme.Atlantianscouldfeedoffmortals,butitdidnothingforthem.Apparently,
however,theworldwasonegiantbuffetwhenitcametogodsandPrimals.
However,thispieceofnewsmeant…
Ihadtofeed.
“Doyou…?”Iswallowedhard.“Do
youknowhowoften?”
“ProbablynotasoftenasMalec
onceyoucomeintoyourpower.Unlessinjured.Butuntilthen,youwillneedto
ensureyoudonotweaken.”
“Wait.I’veAscended—”
“Yes,Iknowthat.Thanksfor
pointingitout,”heinterrupted,andmyeyesnarrowed.“Butyouhaven’t
finishedyourCulling.”
Delano’sheadcocked,anditfelt
likemybraindidthesame.
Myabilitieshadbeguntochange
overthelastyear,asIbecameofagetoentertheCulling.Beforethat,Ihad
onlybeenabletofeel—taste—thepainofothers.Butthathadgrown,
allowingmetoreadallemotions.Myabilitytoeasepainhadalsochangedto
onethatcouldhealinjuries.Butafter…hehadsavedmebygivingme
hisblood—thusAscendingme—Ihadbeenabletobringtheyounggirlbacktolife.
So,I’dthoughttheCullinghadrunitscourse.“Howdoyouknow?”
“BecauseIwouldfeelit,”he
said,asifthatexplainedeverything.
Itreallyexplainednothing,not
eventouchingonwhyIwasdifferentthanMalec.Butthosequestionswerelost
intherealizationthatIwouldhavetofeed.Ihadn’tfelttheneedyet.Ididn’t
evenknowwhattothinkaboutwhatwouldhappenifIhadtodoitbeforeI
freed…him.ThatwasyetanotherthingIdidn’twanttostressabout.
Delanonudgedmylimphandwith
thesideofhisface.Ireachedover,gentlypettingthebackofhisneck.I
wishedmyhandsweren’tglovedsoIcouldfeelhisfur.Iknewthathiscoatwas
thickerandsofterthanevenKieran’s.
“Whycan’tIfeedfroma
draken?”Iaskedandthenwonderedifthatwasarudequestion.
“Becauseitwouldburnthe
insidesoutofmost.EvenPrimals.”
Oh.
Allright,then.
Ishookthatdisturbingimage
frommymind.“Whatexactlywouldweakenagod?Besidesbeinginjured?”
Reaver’sheadtiltedonceagain.
“Youdonotknowmuchaboutyourself,doyou?”
Mylipspursed.“Well,thiswhole
godthingisrelativelynew,and,youknow,therearen’tanygodsstanding
aroundreadytoeducateme.NorarethereanytextsIcansimplyread.”
Hemadeaharrumphingsoundas
ifthoseweren’tgoodenoughreasons.“Mostinjurieswouldonlyweakenyouunless
theywereserious.Thenyouwillweakenmorequickly.Usingtheessenceofthe
godscan,overtime,alsoweakenyouifyouhaven’tcompletedtheCulling.
Which,asIsaid,youhavenot.”
Delano’searsflattened.That’s
notideal.
No,itwasn’t.Usingtheeather
meantthatIcouldfightlikeagod,butifitweakenedme…Mystomachdipped.
“Ididn’tknowthat.”
“I’mshockedtohearthat.”
EvenKieranwould’vebeen
impressedbythelevelofsarcasminReaver’svoice.“HowwillIknowwhenthe
Cullingiscomplete?”
“You’llknow.”
Iresistedtheurgetopickup
oneofthesmallrocksandthrowitathim.“Whatgoodishavingthatkindof
powerifitinevitablyweakensme?”
“Itisabalance,meyaahLiessa,”hesaid,andIblinked.Ihadn’texpectedtohearhimcallme
myQueenlikethewolvendid.“Evenwehaveweaknesses.Thefirewebreathe
istheessenceofthePrimals.Usingittiresus.Slowsusdown.Eventhe
Primalshadtheirlimitations.Weaknesses.Onlyoneisinfinite.”
Nyktos.
Hewouldbeinfinite.
“FromwhatIcanremember,it
varieshowmuchusingtheessenceweakensfromgodtogod,”hecontinued.“But
asIsaid,youcarrythePrimalessencewithinyou.Iimagineitwilltakelonger
foryoutoweakenthatway,butyouwillknowwhenithappens.”Hisheadturned
inthedirectionofthecamp.“Yourwolvencomes.”
Asugaryrippleofamusementcame
fromDelanoasIlookedovermyshoulder,seeingadistantfigureamongthe
brokenstoneandtallgrass.“Ifyou’retalkingaboutKieran,he’snotmywolven.”
Thewindliftedthestrandsof
Reaver’shairawayfromhisface,revealingtheblandsettohisfeatures.“Is
henot?”
“No.”Iignoredthequiet
huffingsoundthatDelanomadeasIrose.“Noneofthewolvenaremine.”I
glancedupathim.“Thewolvenbelongtonoonebutthemselves.Thesamegoes
foryouandtheotherdraken.”
Therewasapause.“Yousounda
lotlike…her.”
Notingthesofteningofhis
tone,Ilookedupathim,openingmysenses.Asbefore,Ifeltnothing.Inmy
chest,theessenceofthegodshummed,andtheurgetopush,toseeifIcould
shatterhiswallswasalmostashardtoresistasnotthrowingarockathim
hadbeen.“TheConsort?”
Abriefsmileappeared,andmygods,
itwasabreathtakingtransformation.Thechillyhollownesstohisfeatures
vanished,turninghimfromsomeoneuniquelyappealingtoastunning,otherworldly
beauty.“Yes.Youremindmeverymuchofthe…Consort.”
Thewayhesaidthatwasmore
thanalittleodd,butIthoughtofwhatNektashadsaid.Areminderthatthis
wasn’tjustabouthim.“WilltheConsortreallywakeuponIres’s
return?”
“Yes.”
“Andwhatdoesthatmeanforthe
othergods?”Forus,Iwantedtoadd,butIwasn’tsureifItrulywanted
toknowtheanswertothatatthemoment.
“Iimaginetheywilleventually
wake.”
IwonderedwhytheConsortbeing
awakehadanythingtodowiththeothergods.Orifitreallyhadtodowith
Nyktos—thatifhisConsorthadtosleep,hechosetobewithher,whichcaused
theothergodstosleep.IwasalsotiredofcallinghertheConsort.“What’s
hername?”
Hissmilevanished,andhis
featuressharpenedashestareddownatmefromhisperch.“Hernameisashadow
intheember,alightintheflame,andthefireintheflesh.ThePrimalof
Lifehasforbiddenustospeakorwritehername.”
Disbelieffloodedme.“That
soundsincrediblycontrolling.”
“Youdon’tunderstand.Tospeak
hernameistobringthestarsfromtheskiesandtopplethemountainsintothe
sea.”
Mybrowsinchedupmyforehead.
“That’sabitdramatic.”
Reaversaidnothing.Instead,he
rosesoquicklyIdidn’thaveachancetoevenlookaway.Thankfully,Isaw
nothingIshouldn’tseebecausetinysilverysparkseruptedallalonghisbodyas
heleaptfromthepillarandchanged.Mymouthdroppedopenasalong,
spikedtailformed,andthenpurplish-blackscalesappeared.Thick,leatherywings
unfurledfromtheshimmeroflight,brieflyblockingoutthemutedglareofthe
sun.Withinseconds,adrakensweptthroughtheair,highabove.
Aspringy,featherlightsensation
brushedagainstmythoughtsasIstaredup.AsIsaidbeforeandwilllikely
sayagain,Delano’svoicewhispered,he’sanoddone
“Yeah,”Isaid,drawingtheword
out.“Whatdoyouthinkaboutwhathesaid,though?Aboutwhatwouldhappenif
wespoketheConsort’sname?”
Ireallydon’tknow,he
answeredaswestartedacrossthefoundation.Couldshebethatpowerful?
AspowerfulasNyktos?Becausethat’swhatitsoundedlike.
Itreallydid,butnonewere
morepowerfulthanNyktos.Orhisequal.NoteventheConsort.Ididn’tlike
thinkingthat,butitwaswhatitwas.
Delanostayedatmysideaswe
crossedtheruins,carefullymakingourwaythroughthewispyreedsandbroken
stonetowardthesmallgroupheadedourway.Emilandthedark-hairedPerry,whose
skinwasawarmbrowninthesunthatbrokethroughthepines,flankedKieran.
Thewolvenwastheonlyonewhodidn’twearthegoldandsteelarmor—because
of…reasons
Kierancarriedsomething.A
smallbox.Aswedrewcloser,Reaverlandedamongthewildflowers,shakingthe
nearbyhalf-standingwalls.Hishornedheadswiveledinthedirectionofthe
approachinggroup.EmilandPerrywiselygaveReaverawideberthwhileKieranignored
thedraken’spresence
Iknewsomethinghadhappened
themomentIsawthetensionbracketingKieran’smouth,butIpickedupnothing
fromhim
Hisemotionswereshielded,and
thatwasn’tnormalatall.
Ilookedattheothersmore
closely.Therewasnohalf-wildgrinorteasingglintinEmil’sgoldeneyes
either.TartuneasinessdriftedfromPerry.WhenEmildidn’tpausetomakeanelaborate
displayofkneeling,theuneasetripled.
Iglancedattheboxagain,and
everythinginmeslowed.Myheart.Mybreathing.Thewoodenboxwasnobigger
thanthelengthofthewolvendaggersheathedtomythighbutadornedwith
blood-redrubies.“What’sthat?”
“ARoyalGuardbroughtittothe
RiseofMassene,”Emilanswered,hisknucklesbleachedwhitefromclutchingthe
hiltofhissword.“Hewasalone.Saidhetraveleddayandnightfromthe
capital.Allhehadwasthatsmallchest.HesaiditwasfortheQueenof
Atlantia,fromtheQueenofSolis.”
Thebackofmynecktightened.
“Howdidsheknowwewerehere?”Ilookedbetweenthem.“There’snowayword
could’vetraveledtoCarsodoniathatquickly.”
“Goodquestion,”Kieransaid.
“Itwouldbeimpossibleforhertoknow.”
Butshedid.
Mygazeflickedtotheboxonce
more.“AndwhereistheRoyalGuardnow?”
“Dead.”Anicyblastaccompanied
Emil’slingeringshock.“Assoonashefinishedspeaking,hestoodrightthere
andslithisdamnthroatwideopen.I’dneverseenanythinglikethat.”
“Thatdoesn’tbodewell.”Tiny
bumpseruptedallovermyskinasmygazefelltothewoodenbox.Agift?“Have
youopenedit?”
Kieranshookhishead.“TheRoyal
Guardsaidonlyyourbloodcouldopenit.”
IfrownedasReaverstretched
hislongneck,eyeingwhatKieranheld.
“Hehadtobetalkingaboutold
magic—Primalmagic.”Perry’shandsomefeaturesweredrawntightbytension.“If
oneknewhowtousePrimalmagic,theycouldcreatewardsorspellsthatwould
workinawaythatonlyrespondedtocertainbloodorbloodlines.Theycould
usethemagicforalmostanything,really.”
“It’sthesamekindofPrimal
magicthatcreatedtheGyrms,”Kieranremindedme.
Isuppressedashudderatthe
imageofthefacelesscreaturesmadeofeatheranddirtthatwereconjured
forth.TheUnseenhadcreatedthem,butitwasnowabundantlyclearthatthe
BloodQueenhadgainedknowledgeoftheoldmagic—howtotapintothePrimal
essencesthatcreatedtherealmsandwasaroundusatalltimes.
Mymusclestensedevenfurther
asIstaredatthebox.Malecwould’veknownallaboutoldPrimalmagicthatwas
nowforbidden.“WhatamIsupposedtodo?Cutaveinandbleedonit?”
“Let’snotcutaveinopen,”
Kieranadvised.
“Adroportwoofyourbloodwill
probablysuffice,”PerrysuggestedasDelanomovedbetweenus,brushingagainst
theAtlantian’slegs.Perryreacheddown,runninghishandalongthelengthof
Delano’sback.
“Howdoyouknowsomuchabout
Primalmagic?”IaskedasIreachedforthebox.Kieranheldon,clearlyreluctant
toletgo.Mygazeflewtohis,mysensesopening.ThenIfeltsomethingfrom
him.Itwastartinthebackofmythroat.Unease.Amuscleflexedinhisjaw
asheletgoofthesurprisinglylightweightbox.
“Myfather,”Perryanswered,and
IthoughtofLordSvenasIturned,lookingforaflatsurfaceonwhichto
placethebox.Ifoundaportionofwallthatstoodaboutwaisthigh.“He’s
alwaysbeenfascinatedwiththeoldPrimalmagic,collectinganythingwrittenabout
itthathecouldgethishandson.”Therewasaroughchuckle.“Spendany
amountoftimewithhim,andhe’llstarttellingyouhowthereusedtobe
spellsthatcouldguaranteeasuccessfulyieldingofcropsormakeitrain.”
“HasheevertriedtousePrimal
magic?”Isattheboxontheflattestsectionofanearbywall.
“No,YourHighness.”
AshakybreathleftmeasI
glancedatPerry.“Youdon’thavetocallmethat.We’refriends.”
“Thankyou,Your—”Hecaught
himselfwithafaintsmile.“Thankyou,Penellaphe.”
“Poppy,”Iwhisperedabsently.
“Poppy,”Perryrepeated
withanod.“Myfather,hewouldn’tdareangertheAraeoreventhesleeping
godsbyusingsuchmagic.”
“TheArae?”Ittookamomentfor
theimageofPriestessAnaliaandtheheavytomecalledTheHistoryofThe
WarofTwoKingsandtheKingdomofSolistocreepintomythoughts.I
remembered.“TheFates.”
“Yes,”Perryconfirmed.
IrememberedTawnyandIonce
talkingaboutthem,andthewholeideaofbeingsthatcouldeitherseeor
controltheoutcomeofthelivesofeverylivingcreatureseemedutterly
unbelievabletobothofus.Butthenagain,Ihadn’tbelievedinSeersor
prophecieseither.
Iturnedbacktothebox.“LordSven’s
knowledgeofPrimalmagicmaycomeinhandy.He’llbearrivingwithValyn,
won’the?”
“Yes.”
Kieransteppedinclose,his
earthyscentsurroundingme,remindingmeofthewoodsbetweenCastleTeerman
andthecityAtheneum.“Idon’tknowaboutthis,Poppy.”Hetouchedmyarm.
“Therecouldbeanythinginthatbox.”
“Idoubtsheplacedavenomous
viperinthere,”IrepliedasItuggedthegloveoffmylefthand,shovingitinto
thepocketofmysweatercoat.
“Shecould’veplacedanymanner
ofvenomousorpoisonousthingsinthatbox,”hecountered,hisvoicelow.“I
don’tlikethis.”
“Idon’teither,but…”Iturned
mylefthandover,revealingthegoldenswirlacrossmypalm.Themarriage
imprint.ThenIwithdrewthewolvendaggerfromitssheath.“Ineedtoknow.”I
loweredmyvoiceasImetKieran’sstare.“Ihaveto.”
Thehardpressofhismouthtightened,
buthenodded.Reaver’sshadowfelloverusashewatched.Thebloodstoneshone
adeepredasIquicklydraggedthetipofthesharpbladeovermythumb.I
grittedmyteethatthebrief,stingingpain.BloodwelledasIsheathedthe
dagger.
“WheredoyouthinkIshould
placemyblood?”Iasked,myhandsteady.
“Iwouldtrythelatchinthe
center,”Perrysuggested,inchingcloser.
Ididn’thesitate,smearingmy
bloodoverthesmallmetallatchshapedverymuchlikeakeyhole—withouta
hole.Ipulledmyhandbackandwaited.
Nothinghappened.
Perryleanedin.“Maybetry—”
Thensomething
happened.
Afaint,reddish-blackshadow
seepedoutfromtheseamastheboxcrackedopen.Emilcursed…ormaybesaida
prayer.Iwasn’tsure.HelurchedforwardasKieranthrewouthisarmasifhe
soughttoedgemeaway,buttheripplingshadowquicklydisappeared.The
Atlantianhaltedasthelockunlatchedwithaclick,andthelidcrackedopen.
Mystomachdipped.Intheback
ofmymind,Iacknowledgedthatthesightofsuchathingayearagowould’ve
hadmebackingupandprayingtogodsIhadnoideastillslept.Ireachedfor
thebox.
“Careful,”Kieranmurmured,his
handnowhoveringnearmine.
Ihadafeelingifaviperdid
springoutofthebox,Kieranwouldcatchitwithhisbarehands.
AndIwouldalsoscream.
Slowly,Iliftedthelidtherest
oftheway.Apillowofcrimsonsatinappearedwithin,andnestledinthecenter
was—
Ijerkedback,stumbling.Icy
shockcoatedmythroat.Noonespoke.Nooneelsemoved.NotevenKieran,who
staredintothebox,hishandstillhoveringoverit.Notevenme.
Myheartstartedpounding.My
breathquickened.Kieran’shandtrembledandthenclosedintoafist.
Theweddingbandmadein
Spessa’sEndshonealustrousgold,matchingtheoneIwore.
Alwaysandforever.
Thesamemessagewasinscribed
onboth.Neitherofushadremovedourringssincetheceremony.
Andthisonehadn’tbeennow,
either,foritremainedonthefingerIhadplacediton.
Chapter6
Thatwashisring.
Thatwashisfinger.
Thatwasapieceofhim
Kieranshotforward,smackinga
handdownonthelid,butIstillsawwhatlayinside.Iwouldnevernotseeit.NotifIlivedthousandsofyears.Iwouldn’tforget.
Piercinghowlsechoedfromwithin
Massene,shatteringthestunnedsilenceasIstaredattheruby-adornedbox.
Someonespoke,butIcouldn’tmakesenseofthewords.Theshockand
bitter-tastinghorrorpressedagainstmyhummingskin.Ihadnochancetoshut
downmysenses.Myicydisbeliefandanguishcrashedintoothers’,butitwas
whatlayundertheagonythatchokedme—thesour,suffocatingchurningofguilt
thatwasmine.Allmine.
BecauseIhadcausedthis.
Ithadbeenmymessagethathad
antagonizedtheBloodQueen.Myhandthatheldthebladethat’dseveredKing
Jalara’shead.MyactionsthathadguidedtheBloodQueen’shand.Ihadtaken
therisk,believingshewouldn’tharmhim.Notwhensheneededhim.I’dbeen
mistaken.
Ihadbroughtthisontohim
Thecrackinmychestwasacrevice
thatfracturedandbrokewideopen.Thefloodofeatherspilledfromthechasm,
brimmingwithunfetteredrageandendlessagony.Thechargedenergyhittheair
aroundme.Ancientpowersurged,risingoncemore,deepfromtheagony,absolute
andfinal.Asilvery-whiteauracrowdedthecornersofmyvisionasIsparked
lightand…
Tendrilsofdarklightarcedand
pulsedthroughthesilveryauraastheeathermanifestedaroundme.Light
lancedwithshadowsgatheredneartheground,churningaroundmylegs.
DelanoedgedPerryback—awayfromme.Thewolvensanklowtotheground,hisearsflatteningasReaver
stretchedhisheadtothesky,emittingastrange,staggeredsound.
Inthebackofmymind,IknewI
wasmakingthemuneasy—thattherawanguishwascallingthewolventome.I
mightevenbescaringthem,andIdidn’twantthat.Butall…
AllIsawwashisring—hisfinger
inthatbox.
Ishuddered,andfromthatcold,
hollowfractureinmychest,icywrathandvengeancepouredout.
ThatwasallIbecame.
NotPoppy.
NottheformerMaidenandnowthe
QueenofAtlantia.
Therewouldbenomorewaiting.
Nocarefullylaidplans.Nohesitationorthought.IwouldtearthroughSolis,sweeping
acrossthekingdomliketheplagueshewas.Nocitywouldbeleftstanding.
IwouldriptheBloodForestaparttofindherpreciousMalec,andthenIwould
sendherthegiftofherloveintinypieces.Therewouldbe
noplaceforhertorun.Nowhereshecouldfindshelter.
Iwouldlaywastetotheentire
realmandher.
Turningstiffly,Isplayedmy
fingerswideasIstartedwalkingtowardCauldraManor—towardthewaiting
horizonofOakAmbler.Thereedsandtallstemsoflavenderparted,shrinkingback.
Thepinestrembled.
“Poppy!”avoiceshouted,andmy
headsnappedinthedirectionofthesound.Thewolvenhaltedafewfeetfrom
me,hiswideeyesfixedonme,thebluenowluminous,hispupilsnolonger
blackbutglowingasilvery-white.“Whereareyougoing?”
“Carsodonia,”Ispoke,andmy
voicewasfullof…smokeandshadow.Fullofdeathandfire.“I’mgoingtoslice
everyfingerfromtheBloodQueen’shands,onebyone.I’mgoingtopeelthe
fleshfromherbody.”Ashiverofanticipationswirledovermyskin.“ThenI
willriphertonguefromhermouthandtearhereyesfromherface.”
“Thatsoundslikeadamngood
plan.”Kieran’svoicehadchanged,too,rougheningashetookasteptowardme.
“AndIwanttoberighttherebesideyouwhenyoudoit.Iwouldlovenothing
morethantohelpyou.”
“Thenhelpme.”Myvoice…itslithered
withthewind,carryingfarastheshadow-lacedlightrippledalongtheground.
Throughthetall,bushyweedsandflowers,sleek,darkshapesracedtowardus.
Thewolven.Theytoowouldswarmthecities,aseaofclawsandteethanddeath.
“Youcanallhelpme.”
“Wecan’t,”Kieransaid,the
tendonsinhisneckstandingoutinstarkrelief.“Youcan’t.Youcan’tdo
this.”
Istopped.Everythingstopped.
Thefainttremblingundermyfeet.Thewolven,whohaltedintheirtracks.I
staredattheonebeforeme.“Ican’t?”
Hestretchedhisneck,hischest
risingandfalling.“No,youcan’t.”
Myheadtilted.“Youthinkyou
canstopme?”
Adrylaughrattledhisbody.
“Fuck,no.Butthatdoesn’tmeanIwon’ttry.BecauseIcan’tletyoudothis.”
Heedgedcloser,foolishlybrave.Foolishlyloyal.Becausehewasn’t
justawolven.MyfingerscurledinwardasIforcedmyselftofocusonKieran,
onwhathewassaying.Onwhathemeanttome.Advisor.Friend.Moreinthe
pastweeks.“Iknowyou’reinpain.Thatyouhurtandareangry.You’reafraid
forCas—”
Thesilver-tingedshadowspulsed
aroundme.CasHeloveditwhenIcalledhimCas.Hadsaid
onlythosehetrustedmostcalledhimthat.Thatitremindedhimthathewasa
person.Ishuddered,thebackofmythroatburningwiththerage,theguilt,
andtheagony.
Kieranwaswithinreachnow,
mereinchesfromtheswirlingmassofpowerradiatingfromme.Tensionhad
gatheredinhim,tighteningthelinesofhisface.“Youwanttomakeherpay
forwhatshedid.Ido,too.Wealldo.Butifyoudothis—ifyougoanywhere
likethis—peoplewilldie.Innocentsyouwanttohelp.PeopleCas
wantstoprotect.”
Fieryanguishtwistedmychest.Cas.
Whowasprotectinghim?Noone.Atremorcoursedthroughme,hitting
theground.Thepinesshookharder.“Idon’tcare.”
“Bullshit.Youcare.Cascares,”
hesaid,andIflinched.Notatthesoundofthenamebutatthetruth.“That’s
whatbothofyouhavebeentryingtoavoid.That’swhywehaveplans.Butif
youdothis?Thoseyoudon’tkillwillbeterrifiedofyou—ofallofus.If
theyevensawyoulikethisnow,theywouldneverseeyouasanythingelse.”
Iglanceddownatthewhirling
shadowsandthelightdancingovermyskin.Inmyskin.Thenext
breathItookwastootight.“Shehurthim.”
“Iknow.Gods,Iknow,Poppy.
Buttherewillneverbepeaceifyoudothis,”herasped,hislipspressing
backagainsthisteeth.“EvenifyoudestroytheBloodCrownandendtheRite,
youwillbecomewhatmortalsandAtlantiansfear,andyouwillnever
forgiveyourself.”
Ifeltnofearfromhimashe
liftedhishands,piercingthethrummingauraofpoweraroundmewithout
hesitation.Whatbloomedinthebackofmythroat,easingtheburnbuilding
there,wassoftandsweet.Theeatherslippedoverhishandsandcrawleduphis
forearmsashispalmspressedagainstmycheeks—againsttheraggedscaralong
myleftone.
Hishands…theytrembled.“What
you’refeelingisyou,butwhatyouwanttodoisn’t.It’sher.It’s
somethingtheBloodQueenwoulddo.It’ssomethingshe’dwantyoutodo.But
youarenother.”
Iwasn’tanythinglikeher.
Iwasn’tcruelorabusive.I
didn’ttakepleasureinothers’pain.Ididn’tlashoutinanger…
Actually,Ididtendtolashout
withsharpobjectswhenangry,butIwasn’tspiteful.Iwouldn’thave
donewhatshehad,takingallthepainandhurtshefeltafterthelossof
Malecandtheirson,allthathatredtowardtheformerQueenofAtlantia,and
turningitonnotjustEloana’ssonsbutalsoanentirekingdom—anentirerealm
Andthatwouldbeexactlywhat
I’dbedoing.I’dleavenothingbuthauntinggraveyardsbehind.AndIwouldn’t
belikemymother.
Iwouldbesomethingfarworse.
Kieran’shandsshook.Hisentire
bodyrattledasifthegroundwereshaking,butitwashim.
Concernrose,beatingbackthe
brutaltideofemotions.“W-whyareyoushaking?AmIhurtingyou?”
“No.It’sthe…it’sthenotam,”
hebitout.“It’smakingmewanttoshift.I’mfightingit.”
Mygazesearchedthetautlines
ofhisface.“Whyisitmakingyouwanttodothat?”
Astrainedchucklelefthim.“Do
youthinkthat’sanimportantquestionrightnow?”Hegavemeashortshakeofhis
head.“BecauseIcanprotectyoubetterinthatform.And,yes,Iknowyou
don’tneedourprotection,butthenotamrecognizesthekindofemotion
youfeelasa—acallofalarm.I…Idon’tthinkIcanfightitmuchlonger.”
Myattentiondartedoverhisshoulder
towhereIsawtheformsofmanywolvenamongtheweeds.Therewasnowayall
ofthemcould’vealreadybeenintheirwolvenforms.Theyhadbeencompelledto
dothat.
I’dforcedthem,andthatmade
mystomachhurt.
Icedrenchedmyskin,andthechill
quelledthefire.Isqueezedmyeyesshut.Control.Ineededcontrol.
Therewasnothreattome.TheoneatriskwasinCarsodonia.Losingitdid
absolutelynothingtohelphim,andKieranwasright.Irepeatedthatoverand
over.Ihadn’tspentthepastweeksplanningforhowtokeeppeoplesafeonly
toturnaroundandbethecauseofthousands,ifnotmillionsofdeaths.
Thatwasn’tme.
Thatwasn’twhoIeverwantedto
become
Anothershudderrockedmeasthe
vibrationsinmychesteasedandthehumrecededfrommyskin.Theragewasstill
there,aswastheguiltandagony,butthewrathandthehungerforvengeancewas
banked,returningtothosecold,emptyplacesinsidemewhereIfeareditmay
fester.
“It’sokay,”Kieransaid,andI
wasslowtorealizethathewasn’tspeakingtome.“Justgiveussometime,all
right?”Therewasapause,andthenhemovedcloseasheguidedmyheaddownto
hischest.Ididn’tfightit,welcomingthewarmthandthefamiliar,earthyscent.
Hespokeaboutthebox,aboutwhatwasinit.Heclearedhisthroat.“Don’t
tellanyoneaboutit.No…nooneneedstoknow.”
Someonenearedus,andKieran’s
handslidtothebackofmyheadastheotherleftmycheek.“Thankyou,”he
said.
Inthequietthatfollowed,a
rushofwingsbroughtagustoflavender-scentedair.Afewmomentslater,
somethingbrushedagainstmylegs.Delano.Ikeptmyeyesclosed
tightlyagainstthesting.IwantedtotellhimthatIwassorryifI’dworried
orscaredhim,butIcouldn’tgetthewordspasttheknotinmythroat.
Kieran’schinlowered,restingonthetopofmyhead.Thequietwentonfor
sometime.
AndthenKieransaidinalow
voice,“Youscaredmealittle,Poppy.”
Pressureclampeddownonmy
chest.“I’msorry.Ididn’tmeanto.”
“Iknowyoudidn’t.”Hischest
roseagainstmine.“Iwasn’tscaredofyou.Iwasafraidforyou,”he
added.“I…I’veneverseenthatbefore.Theshadowsintheeather.Andyour
voice?Itwasdifferent.LikeitwaswhenyouspoketoDukeSilvan.”
“Idon’tknowwhatanyofthat
was.”Iswallowedthickly.
“Yourabilitiesarestill
changing.Growing,”hesaid,makingmethinkofwhatReaverhadshared.
Wasthis—theshadowsinthe
eather—anewmanifestationduetomestillgoingthroughtheCulling?Ididn’t
know.Andatthemoment,Icouldn’tsparetheenergyrequiredtodwellonit.
“Youknowhe’sstillalive,”
Kieransaidafteracoupleofmoments.Thoughtsoftheever-changingabilities
faded.“Theimprintisstillonyourpalm.Helives.”
Iclosedmylefthand,pressing
ittoKieran’schest.“Butshe…”Icouldn’tfinish.
“He’sstrong.Youknowthat.”
Gods,Ididknowthat.
Butitdidn’tchangewhatwasdonetohim.“Hehastobeinsomuchpain,Kieran.”
“Iknow,buthewillgetpast
this.Iknowit.Andyouwillgetpastthis.”Hishandtightenedinmyloose
braidofhair.“Heisstillyours.Youarestillhis.”
Tearsstungmythroat,myeyes.
“Always,”Iwhisperedhoarsely.Iforcedmyselftotakeadeep,steadybreath.
“Thankyoufor…forstoppingme.”
“Youdon’thavetothankmefor
that.”
“Ido.”Iliftedmyhead,and
hishandfelltothemiddlepartofmybraid.“AndIamsorryaboutworrying
you—worryingallofthem.Ijust…Ilostit.”
“Anyonewould,Poppy.”Kieran
slidhisarmawayandbroughthishandupsoitwasbetweenus.Hetookmyleft
handandpressedsomethingcoolandhardintomypalm.Mybreathsnaggedbecause
Iknewwhathe’dputinmyhand.“Incaseyoudon’tknowthis,nomatterwhat’s
donetoCas,hewon’tregrethischoice.”
Itriedtoswallowagain,to
stopthewordsfromcoming,butIcouldn’t.“Ido.IregretiteverymomentI—”
Asoul-crushingsenseoflossroseoncemore,stealingmybreath.Ittook
everythinginmenottocollapseunderitandletalltherageandpainconsume
meoncemore.Tolashoutandinflictallthatateawayatmeontoanyonewho
stoodinmyway.
Tounleashallthepainuntil
nothingbutboneandbloodremained.
“Whydidhedoit,Kieran?Why?”
Iwhispered,myvoicecatching.
Kieransqueezedmyhand.“You
knowwhy.Thesamereasonyou’ddojustashedidifsomeonewashurtinghim.”
Gods,Ididknowtheanswer.A
tremorcoursedthroughme.Iwould’vedoneanything.BecauseIlovedhim.
Becausehewasmine,andIwashis.Myotherhalf.Apartofme,eventhoughI
hadn’tspokenhisnameinmanyweeks.Ibarelyallowedmyselftoeventhinkit
becauseithurt.
Buthisnamewaslove.
Itwaspowerandstrength.
Itwouldneverbreakme.
Casteel.Ashattered
breathleftme.Casteel.Imademyselfsayitoverandoverinmy
mind.CasteelHawkethroneDa’Neer.Mychestfeltasifaboltwere
tearingthroughitalloveragain,butIsaidhisnametomyselfuntilitno
longermademewanttoscream.UntilIcouldsay,“Casteelisn’tlosttous.”
“No.He’snot,”Kieranagreed,
slippinghishandawayfrommine.
Slowly,Iopenedmyfist.
His…Casteel’sringrestedinmypalm,strongandbeautiful.Therewasn’tatrace
ofbloodonit.EitherEmilorPerryhadwipeditcleanwhentheytookitfrom
thebox.“Whatdidtheydowiththe…?”Icouldn’tbringmyselftosayit.
“It’suptoyou.”Kieran’svoice
washoarse.“Youcanburnorburyit.Oroneofuscan.Youdon’teverhaveto
seeitagain.Youdon’tneedto,Poppy.There’snoreasonto.”
Ididn’twanttoseeitagain.
Forcingmyselftodosodidnothingbutinflictdamage.GlancingupatKieran,
Isensedthathehadhisemotionslockeddownoncemore.Iknewhediditsoit
wouldn’taddtowhatIwasfeeling.
Kieranwas…hewastoogood.
“Burnit,”Iforcedmyselfto
say.“ButIdon’twantyoutodoit.Idon’twantyouanywherenearit.”
Heinhaledsharplyandnodded.
Isqueezedthering.Always
andforever.“Wasthereanythingelseinthebox?”
“Acard.”
“Didyouhaveachancetosee
it?”
“Onlybriefly.”
“Whatdid—?”Mystomachtwisted
withnausea.“Whatdiditsay?”
“Itsaidthatshewassorryto
havecausedyouanypain,”hetoldme.
Therewassomethingso,so
wrongwithher.Butatonce,IknewwhatIneededtodo.Iknewwhathadto
comenext.
BecauseIcouldnolongerwait.
WhenItookmynextbreath,it
waseasier.“Wehaveplans—onesthatareimportanttoSolisandAtlantia.”The
nextwordswerehardtospeak,eventhoughtheyweretrue.“Plansthatare
biggerthan…Casteelandme.”
Kieransaidnothing,butIknew
heagreed.EvenifCasteelstoodbesidemenow,therewouldstillbetheBlood
Crown.TheRiteswouldcontinue.Childrenwouldbestrippedawayfromtheirfamilies,
eithertoAscendorbecomenothingmorethancattletotheAscended.Innocent
peoplewouldstillbemurdered.Atlantiawouldstillrunoutoflandandresources.
Allofthiswasbiggerthanus.
TheBloodCrownhadtobedestroyed.
Ibroughttheringclosetomy
chestasIliftedmystaretoKieran.“ButCasteelismoreimportanttome.I
knowthat’swrong.IknowIshouldn’tthinkthat,letalonesayitoutloud,
butit’sthetruth.”
Kieransaidnothing,buthe’d
gonecompletelystill.
“She’snotgoingtorelease
him.”Abreezecaughttheloosenedstrandsofmyhair,tossingthemacrossmy
face.“Shewillhurthimagain.”Angerflaredinsideme,threateningtoignite
oncemore.“Youknowthatshecouldbedoinganythingtohimrightnow.Youknow
whatitdidtohimlasttime.”
Hisjawclenched.“Ido.”
“Ican’tletherhavehimfor
weeksandmonths.Andthat’showlongitwilltakeforustotaketheAtlantian
armiesacrossSolis.Casteeldoesn’thavethatkindoftime.Wedon’thavethat
kindoftime.”
Kieranstareddownatme.“I
knowwhatyou’rethinking.YouwanttogotoCarsodonia.”
“AfterwetakeOak
Ambler,”Iamended.“TheBloodCrownneedstobedestroyed,andweneedtodo
ittherightway.IneedtobeheretoconvinceValynandthegeneralsthatour
planistherightone.Ineedtobeheretoseethatthrough.”
“Andthen?”
“AndthenIwillgoto
Carsodonia,andyouwillleadthearmiestotheothercities.”
Hispaleblueeyeshardened.
“Andifyou’recapturedintheprocess?”
“It’sariskI’mwillingto
take.I’llbefine.Isbethdoesn’twantmedead,”Ireasoned.“Ifthatwaswhat
shewanted,shehadampleopportunitytodoso.She…sheneedsmeifsheseeks
tocontrolAtlantia.ThisiswhatIneedtodo.”
Kieranfoldedhisarmsoverhis
chest.“Iagree.”
Mybrowsflewup.“Youdo?”
“Ido.Casneedstobefreed,
butthere’soneproblemwithyourplan.Actually,”hesaid,frowning,“there
arealotofproblems.StartingwiththefactthatIdoubtyouevenhaveaplan
beyondwalkinguptoCarsodonia’sRise.”
Iopenedmymouthandthen
snappeditshut.Hislookturnedknowing.Frustrationboredownonme.“Iwill
comeupwithaplanthatdoesn’tinvolvemewalkinguptotheRiseof
Carsodonia.I’mnotafool,Kieran.”
“You’reafoolifyouthinkI’ll
beanywhereotherthanbyyourside,”heshotback.“There’snowayinhellyou’re
goingtoCarsodoniawithoutme.”
“It’stoodangerous—”
“Areyoukiddingme?”
“It’stoodangerousforanyone
elsetogo.”
Hestareddownatme.“Youdo
realizethatwe’reatwar?Therefore,anynumberofus,includingme,could
die.”
Istiffenedasthestatement
knockedtheairfrommychest.“Don’tsaythat—”
“It’sthetruth,Poppy.Allof
usknowtherisks,andwe’renotherejustforyou.HeisourKing.”Hemetmy
glarewithhisown.“Also,Idon’tbelievethatonceyouhaveacoupleof
minutestothinkaboutthis,youwon’tseriouslyreconsidertakingonthe
entiredamnBloodCrownbyyourself.”
Maybehewasright.Butatthe
moment,Ireallywantedto.“Okay,Iwon’tgoalone.Iwillseewhowantsto
makethetripwithme.ButIneedyouhere.ItrustyoutomakesureValynand
theothersfollowourplans.Becausetherecanbenotrucethistime.No
stalemate.Itrustyoutomakesurethereisachanceforpeacewhenwedestroy
theBloodCrown.AstheAdvisortotheCrown,theyhavetofollowyourorders.”
“Iappreciateyourtrust.Am
honored.Flattered.Whatever,”hesaid,andIdidn’tthinkhesoundedhonored
atall.“Butyoucantrustotherstoensurethatourplansarecarriedout.”
“Idotrustothers.Yoursister.
Naill.Delano.Emil—Icouldkeeplistingnames.Buttheyholdnopositionof
authoritylikeyoudoastheadvisor.YouareanextensionoftheCrown.You
speakonbehalfoftheKingandQueen.Noneoftheothershavethatkindof
authority.”
“Butanyofthemcan,”he
insisted.“Youcanmakeoneofthemaregent—apersonthatyou,astheQueen,can
appoint.Someonewhowillactonyourbehalfinyourabsence.Normally,that
wouldbetheAdvisortotheCrown,butthereisnolawthatstatesithastobe
theadvisor.TheCrownRegentwouldtemporarilyactonyourbehalf,andtheirword
mustbefollowednodifferentlythanifitwereyouissuingtheorders.”
“Oh.”Iblinked.“I…didn’tknow
that.But—”
“Thereisnobut.”
“Butthereis.”Panic
startedtocreepin.“Ifsomethingweretohappentoyou—”
“TherewouldbenothingforCas
toforgiveyouforifsomethingdid,”hecutmeoff.“Hewouldexpectnothing
lessthanmebeingbyyourside.”
Istaredathimindisbelief.
“Ifyou’dletmefinishasentence,IwasabouttosayIwouldnever
forgivemyself.”
Hisstaresoftened.“AndIwould
neverforgivemyselfifyouwentintotheheartoftheAscendedwithoutme.”He
claspedthebackofmyneck.“JustasIhaven’tforlettingCasgoallthose
yearsago.”
Oh,gods.“Kieran—”
“Don’tforgetwhathemeansto
me,Poppy.I’veknownhimmywholedamnlife,”hesaid.“Wesharedthesamecrib
moretimesthannot.Wetookourfirststepstogether.Satatthesametable
mostnights,refusingtoeatthesamevegetables.Weexploredtunnelsand
lakes,pretendedthatfieldswerenew,undiscoveredkingdoms.Wewere
inseparable.Andthatdidn’tchangeaswegrewolder.”Hisvoiceroughened,and
hedroppedhisforeheadtomine.“Hewasandstillisapartofme.”
Iclosedmyeyesagainstthe
burnaccompanyingtheimagesthathiswordsbroughtforth.Themtoddlingabout
together,Kieranontwolegsandfour.Holdingeachotherastheynapped.
Cominghomecoveredindirtandthegodsonlyknewwhatelse.
“WhereIwent,Caswasthere.
Wherehetraveled,Ifollowed.Theonlytimewehaveeverbeenseparatedand
couldn’tgetbacktooneanotherwaswhentheyheldhimcaptive—andnow.ButI
wasthereforhimafterward.Iwatchedhimnightafternight,wakinginapanic
andthinkingthathewasbackinthatcell.Isawwhathadbeendonetohim.
Howhecouldn’tstandtobetouchedatonepoint.Howeventhesightof
bathwatercausedhimtofreezeup.”
“Bathwater?”Iasked,halfafraid.
“Theywantedhimcleanwhenthey
wantedhim.”
Oh,gods.
Nauseachurned.Ishook,caughtbetween
rageanddespairandshockbecausemymotherhadbeenoneofhisabusers.Howcould
Casteelevenlookatme—?
Istoppedmyselffromgoingdown
thatpath.HeknewwhoIwas.
“Whathemeanstomehasnothing
todowithadamnbond,”Kieransaid.“Ineedtogoasbadlyasyoudo,andhe
needsmetherejustasbadlyasheneedsyou.”
CasteeldidneedKieran.
“I’msorry,”Icroaked.“I
forgot.”
“It’sunderstandablethatyou
would.”
“No,it’sreallynot.”Mygrief
wasmine,anditwaspotent.ButitwasnomoredevastatingthanwhatKieranor
anyoneelsewhocaredforCasteelwasexperiencing.“Iwon’tforgetitagain.”
Kieran’sforeheadslidagainst
mineashenodded.“We’reonthesamepagethen.”
“Weare.”Iblinkedbacktears.
“ThenwhowillbeCrownRegent,meyaah
Liessa?”
ItwashardtofocuswhenallI
wantedtodowashugKieranandsob.Iwantedtositdownandhaveagoodcry,
buttherewasn’ttimeforthat.
Ipulledaway,forcingmyselfto
thinkoverwhatKieranhadsuggested.Worryingmylowerlip,Ilookeddownat
myclosedhand.Theringhadwarmedtomyskin.Ididn’tknowwhatkindof
shapeCasteelwouldbeinwhenIfoundhim.Hecouldbeokayornot,buthewould
wantKierantobewithmeandtobethereforhim.Itcouldn’tbejustKieranand
meorahandfulofothers.NoQueenwouldtravelacrossarealmwithoutguards.
Butweneededthefireofthegods.
“IsawReaverinhismortalform
earlier.”
Kieranarchedabrow.“That…was
random.”
“He’sblond.”
“Thanksforsharing?”
“Hewasalsocompletelynaked
whileperchedonapillar,”Iadded.
“Idon’tevenknowwhattosay
tothat.”
“Me,neither,”Imurmured.“But
thepointis,weneedtobringadrakenwithus.Theycanhelp.Notjust
with…withCasteelbutalsowithmyfather.Nektaswantshimback.”
“Iagree.”Hepaused.“ButI
haveafeelingIwon’tlikewhatyou’reabouttosuggest.TobringReaverwith
us.Theotherdrakenwillbeheresoon.Aureliashifted—”
“Foronlyafewminutes.Iat
leastknowReaverfeelscomfortableenoughinhismortalformtodoitfor
longerthanthat.”
“Great.”Kieranappearedasif
he’dratherfacedownanarmyofskeletonsoldiersagain.
“He’llneedclothing.”
“Don’tknowwhyyou’retelling
methis.”
“Youtwoappeartobeaboutthesame
size.”
Kieranstaredatmeandthen
cursed.“Whatever.I’llseewhatIhave.”
Igrinned,anditinciteda
confusingmixofemotions.Itfeltodd.Evenalittlewrong.Butitwasalsoa
relieftoknowthatIcouldstillfindhumordespitewhatIheldinmyhand.
ThenIrememberedwhatelseReaver
hadtoldme.“Thismaynotbethebestmomenttobringthisup,butwhenI
talkedtoReaver,IfoundoutthatIwillhavetofeedeventually.And,
apparently,becauseI’magod,Icanfeedoffanyone.Exceptthedraken.Even
mortals.Whoknew?”Isaid,thentoldhimwhatReaverbelievedabouthowoften
Iwouldneedtofeed.“Butthere’smore.Itseemsusingeathercanweakenme.
Hedoesn’tknowhowmuchIcanusebeforeithasaneffect.Idon’tthinkitincludes
anythingIwasabletodobefore—”
“Doesfeedingoffanyonemean
youcanfeedoffwolven?”hecutin.
“Yes.Wolvenwouldfallunder
theeverything-but-a-drakenumbrella.”
“Thenfeedoffmeifyouneedto.”
Isuckedinasharpbreath.
“Kieran—”
“Iknowyoudon’twanttofeed
offanyonebutCas,”hesaid,andthebreathItookwithered.“AndIknowthat
feedingscanget…intense,butyou’llbesafewithme.”Hiseyessearchedmine.
“YouknowdamnwellthatCaswouldn’twantyoufeedingoffanyonebutme.”
Astrangledlaughleftme.Casteel
wouldprobablyripthelimbsoffwhoeverIfedfrom—anyonebutKieran,anyway—leaving
themaliveonlybecauseheknewthebloodwasnecessaryforme.
“It’snotthat,”Isaid,shoving
astrandofhairbackfrommyface.Feedingscouldbeintense,andIwasn’tsure
iffeedingoffsomeonemightcausethesamekindsofwickedpleasureabite
couldbring.Butitwasn’tthat—well,itwasn’tcompletelythat.Ihadn’t
evenbeguntowrapmyheadaroundthepossibilitythatmefeedingoffsomeone
otherthanmyhusbandcouldbringthempleasure.
Couldbringme
pleasure.
AndIwasn’tabouttostartthinking
aboutthatrightnow.“Idon’twantyoutofeelasifyouhavetoofferyourself.”
“Idon’tofferbecauseIhave
to.”Kieransqueezedthebackofmyneck.“IofferbecauseIwantto.”
“Really?Yousurethat’snotthe
notam?Thatit’snotyourfriendshipwithCasteel?”
“Itcouldbepartlybecauseof
thenotam.AnditisbecauseofmyfriendshipwithCas.Butit’salso
myfriendshipwithyou.Noneofthosethingsaremutuallyexclusive,”
hetoldme.“IwouldofferthesametoCas.IwouldofferthesametoanyoneI
caredabout.JustlikeIknowyouwouldformeifIneededthat.”
Mybreathstung.Iwouldoffer
myselfifheneededtofeed,andthereminderofhowfarKieranandIhadcome
rattledmeinanentirelydifferentway.Iwasprettysurehehadn’tlikedme
whenwefirstmet.Or,attheveryleast,I’dannoyedhimtonoend.Butnow…?
Iblinkedbackthedampnessgatheringinmyeyes.
Kieranstartedtofrown.“Are
youabouttocry?”
“No.”
“Doesn’tlookthatway.”
“Thenstoplooking,andit
won’t.”
“Thatdoesn’tevenmakesense,
Poppy.”
Aburstofsugaryamusementgathered
onthetipofmytongue.Iglaredathim.“Thisisn’tfunny.”
“Iknowitshouldn’tbe.”Hislips
twitched.“Butitkindofis.”
“Shutup,”Igriped.
Thegrinappearedbriefly.“We’re
onthesamepage,right?Whenyouneedtofeed,you’llcometome?”Alltraces
ofhumorweregonenow.“Andyouwon’tletitgettoapointwhereyou’re
weakened?”
“We’reonthesamepage.”
Hisholdonthebackofmyneck
firmedoncemore.“Whatabouttheregent?”
Afewmomentspassed.“Vonetta.
IwouldmakeVonettatheCrownRegent.”
Approvalhummedashelethis
wallsdownaroundhim,tastingofbutterycakes.“Goodchoice.”
Inodded.“Youknowhowtoget
intoCarsodonia,right?IdoubtyouandCasteelwalkedthroughthegatesofthe
Rise.”
Hesnorted.“No.Wewentinthrough
theElysiumPeaks.”
Mystomachdroppedalltheway
tothetipsofmytoes.ThePeakswerevast—allonecouldseetothewestand
southofCarsodonia.AndtheyextendedintotheWillowPlains.They’deven
builttheRiseintothe—Itstruckmethen.“Youallwentinthroughthe
mines.”
Kierannodded.“Theentrancesto
theminesarerightinsidetheRise.Thetunnelsareguarded,butnotlikethe
gates.Ofcourse,thatwasalsohowMalikgotinthere.ItwashowCasteel
and…”Hismouthtightened.“ThatwashowSheagothimoutofCarsodonia.From
there,heendeduponthebeachesoftheStroudSea.”
Shea.There’dbeenangerbefore
whenIthoughtofher.Now,therewasonlysadness.
“Canwegetoutthesamewaywe
getinoncewefindCasteelandmyfather?”
Kierannodded.“Wecould.But,
Poppy,itwilltaketimetogetoutofthosemines.Besidesthelikelihoodof
themguardingthoseentrancesnow,Caswasinthemforawhile,searchingfora
wayout.Hemayhavemadeitsoundlikeittooknotime,butitdid.”
“Gods,”Iwhispered,heartsick
overapastIcouldn’tchange.“Isthereabetterway?”
“Besidesgoingthroughthegates
indisguise,no.Ifwegetcaughtinthemines,wecanfightourwayoutand
thendisappearintothecityfareasierthaniftheydiscoverusatthegates.”
Thatwastrue.Carsodoniawasa
mazeofnarrowstreetsandvine-coveredalleysthatranthroughdistrictsand
neighborhoodssprawledacrossrollinghillsandvalleys.
Hetookabreath.“Idon’tknow
howtosaythisotherthantojustsayit.Wedon’tknowwhatkindofshapeCas
willbein,butweknowthatyourfatherwilllikelybeworseoff.”
Hedidn’tsayanythingelse,but
Iknewwhathemeant.Wecouldn’tfreebothofthem.
“Wewillstillfreehim,”Kieran
saidquietly.“FreeingCasdoesn’tendthewar.Wewillhavetogobackto
Carsodonia.”
Inodded,hatingtheideaofbeing
soclosetomyfatheranddoingnothing.Buthewasright.Again.
“It’saplan,then?”Kieran
asked.
“Itis.”
Itookyetanotherbreath,andit
waslesspainfulthanalltheonesbeforeitbecausewewouldfindandfreeCasteel.
AndIwouldmakesurethatanypieceofhimthathelostwasfoundoncemore.
HewouldknowexactlywhohewaswhenIsawhimagain.
Iwouldmakesureofit.
Chapter7
Casteel
Therelentlessthrobbingin
mylefthandhadallbutgoneaway,replacedbythegnawingachethatstartedin
mygutandspreadtomychest.
Tiltingmyheadback,Imanaged
adry,scratchy-as-hellswallowandopenedmyeyestothegloomofthecell.
Theflickeringcandlesdidverylittletocastlight,butitstillcausedmy
eyestoache
Andthatwasabadsign.
Ineeded…Ihadtofeed.
Ishouldn’t.Notthissoonafter
feedingfromPoppy.Thathadn’tbeentoolongago,hadit?We’dbeenonthe
ship,onthewaytoOakAmbler.AfterI’dfeastedonallthatliquidheat
betweenherprettythighsasshereadfromMissWilla’sdiary.
Damn.Ilovedthatfuckingbook.
Onesideofmylipscurledup.I
couldstillhearherreadingfromthejournal,hervoicebecomingbreathier
witheachsentence,everylick.Icouldstillseetheflushinhercheeks,
deepeningwitheachparagraph,everywetkiss.Thefeedinghadcomeafterthat
whenI’dtuggedthatlusciousassofherstotheedgeofthedesk,andmydick
andfangshadsunkdeepintosoft,sweetlyscentedflesh,remindingmeofa
lightmistofjasmine.Herblood…
Gods,nothingtastedlikeit—nothing
Ishould’veknownthefirsttime
ItastedherthatshewasmorethanpartAtlantian.Thetasteofherhadbeen
strongeventhen,toopotentforsomeoneonlyofAtlantiandescent.Butasshe
cameintoherpower,especiallyafterherAscension?Herbloodwasasultry
aphrodisiacandproducedahighstrongerthananydrugonecouldcrushintoa
powderandsmoke.Mystarefixedonthecandles,trackingthemeltingwax.
Herbloodwaspurepower—thekind
IinstinctuallyknewIneededtobecarefulwith.Becausethetasteofher,the
wayitmademefeel,itcouldbecomethekindofaddictionIwoulddrownin.
Theroofofmymouththrobbedas
mymouthdriedmore.Icouldalmosttastehernow—ancientandearthy,thickand
decadent.
Groaning,Ibitoutaharsh
curseasIshifted.IneededtostopthinkingaboutPoppy’sblood.AndIreally
neededtostopthinkingabouthowshetastedbetweenherthighs.Ahardcock
wassonotappreciatedatthemoment.
Howmuchtimehad
passed?Acoupleofweeks?Closetoamonth?More?Timeneitherexistednorlet
upinthedarkenedcell,bothanenemyandasavior.Butsofar,ithadn’tbeen
thatbad.Lasttime,Imayhaveescapedwithallmylimbsand
appendagesintact,butthatwasaboutall.
Butwhatwasakillerwasthe
damp,darkquietandtheworry.Thefear.Notforme.Butforher.Lasttime,
therehadbeenShea.AndIhadworriedaboutherbecauseIcared.I’dworried
formyfamilythen.Butthiswasdifferent.Poppywasoutthere,atwar,
andtheneedtohaveherback,toprotecthereventhoughsheneededno
protection,rakedatmyfleshwithsharp,tauntingnails.
Dullpainsettledintomybrowand
templesasIsquinted,lettingmyheadrollawayfromthecandlelight.Icould
gomonthswithoutfeedingifnecessary.Itwasarisktopushitthatlong,but
Icould.Though,normally,Iwasactuallyeatingenoughtokeepmyenergy
levelsupanddidn’thavemybloodsiphonedintosmallvialsroutinely.
Havingthefingerchoppedoff
surehadn’thelped.IdoubtedtheCravenbitedideither.
Ilookeddownatthe
bloodstainedgauzewrappedaroundmyhandandwonderediftheBloodCrownhad
givenuponusinggoldenchalices.Thatwaswhatthey’dusedtocollectmy
bloodbefore.Iwiggledmyfingerscarefully.OneoftheHandmaidenshad
oh-so-kindlyappliedthebandagewhilethatgoldenRevnamedCallumhadmade
sureIallowedit.NotthatIwould’vestoppedher.Thedamnstumpofafinger
bledlikeastuckpig.Stainsstillstreakedmychestandcoveredthe
thighsofmybreeches.Andeverysooften,freshbloodspreadacrossthe
once-whiteandnow-rust-coloredwrappings,remindingmethattheseveredskin
hadn’thealeditself.
Iwasn’tasspecialasaRev,
whowould’veapparentlygrownthedamnfingerback.Buttheskinshould’ve
closedoverthewoundbynow,atleast.
YetmoreproofthatIneededto
feed.
Mygazeflickedtothemetalhip
baththathadbeenbroughtinatsomepointtodaybyasmalllegionof
Handmaidens.Thedamnthinghadlookedheavyashell.Theyhadfilleditwith
steaming,hotwaterthathadlongsincecooled.TheRevCallumhaddone
somethingtolengthenthechain,allowingmetoreachthetubandbathe.
Fuckthat.
Iknewbetterthantomakeuse
ofit,eventhoughIwasbeyondfilthy.Thebathwasoneoftwothings:a
rewardorapreludetopunishment.AndsinceIhadn’tdoneadamnthingtoearn
it,thatleftoptiontwo.Thelasttimethey’dofferedmebathswaswhenthe
BloodQueen’sfriendswantedtoplaywithsomethingfreshandclean.
Somethingthatdidn’tresembleadirty,chainedanimal.
So,Iwouldsitinmyfilth.
Gladly.
Iloweredmyhandtomylap.The
breecheswerestiffwithdriedblood.Staringatmyhand,seeingthedirtied
bandagesandwhattheymeant,myheartthudded.Angertrencheditselfdeep,
turningmycoldskinfeverish.Islammedmybarefootdownonthedamp,uneven
stone.Theactservednopurposeotherthantocausetheshadowstoneshackles
totightenandformyfoottothrob.
Ididn’tgiveafuckaboutthe
finger.MyentirehandcouldbegoneforallIcared.Itwastheringthatwas
nowgonethatbotheredme.ItwaswhatIknewthatbitchhaddonewithitand
thefinger.
She’dsentittoPoppy.
Myrighthandclosedintoafist
asmylipspeeledbackovermyfangs.Iwouldripoutherentrailsandfeed
themtoherbecauseIcouldn’t…
Pressingmyheadbackagainst
thewall,Ishutmyeyes.Neitherdidanythingtoerasetheknowledgethat
Poppymusthaveseenthat.Shehadtoknowwhatthatbitchhaddone,
andtherewasnothing—absolutely,fuckingnothing—Icoulddoaboutit.
ButshehasKieran.Hewould
bethereforher.Andshewouldbethereforhim.Knowingthatmadeitalittle
easiertobreathe.Toletgoofsomeoftherigidtensioninmybody.Theyhad
eachother,nomatterwhat.
Slowly,Ipeeledbacktheedge
ofthesoiledgauze,justenoughtorevealthefaintlyshimmeringgoldenswirl
acrossmypalm.Iexhaledroughlyatthesight—atwhatitmeant.
Shelived.
Ilived.
Thesuddenclickofheelsechoed
throughthedarkhalloutsidethecell.Alert,Iletgoofthegauzeandlooked
totheroundedentryway.Thesoundwasstrange.Noone,noteventhe
free-roamingCraven,madethatmuchnoise.TheHandmaidenswerelikesilent
littleworkerbees.Isbitch’sstepsweremuchlighter,onlyaudible
whenshewasrightnearthecell.ThedamngoldenRevwasgenerallyasquietas
awraith.Thissoundedlikeabarratinheels—abarratinheelsthathummed—very
poorly.
Whatthe…?
Amomentlater,she
sweptintothecell,theclackingofhershoesalmostoverpoweringwhatevershe
wastryingtohum.Ormaybeshewasactuallygroaningbecausethesoundshe
madecarriednotune.Sheheldalantern—well,sheswungalantern
muchlikeachildwould,sendinglightdancingacrossthewalls.
Irecognizedherimmediately,
eventhoughI’dseenheronlyonce,andreddish-blackpaintshapedlikewingshad
coveredhercheeksandmostofherforeheadasitdidnow.Itwasherheight.
Shewasshorterthantherest,andthatstoodouttomebecauseI’dseenhow
easilyshe’dhandledDelano,awolvenwhowasatleastafootandahalf—ifnot
more—tallerthanherinhismortalform.Itwasalsoherscent.Nottherotten
bloodsmellIpickedupfromher,butsomethingsweeter.Itwasfamiliartome.
Ihadeventhoughtthatwhenwe’dbeeninOakAmbler.
ItwastheRevwhohadbeenat
CastleRedrock.Nooneelsefollowedhernow.NoHandmaidens.NoGoldenBoy.No
QueenBitch.
“Hello!”shechirped,givingme
aratherjauntywaveassheploppedthelanternonastoneledgehalfwayupthe
wall.Yellowlightslowlybeatbacktheshadowsinthecellanddriftedover
themessoftangled,inkyblackcurlsfallingoverhershoulders.
Sheturnedtome,claspingher
handstogether.Herarmswerebare,andIsawmarksthere—strangeshapesthat
hadtobedrawnorinkedontoherskinandnotinherskin.“Youdon’t
looksowell.”
“Andyoucan’thumforshit,”I
replied.
TheHandmaidenstuckouther
lowerlip,pouting.“Thatwasrude.”
“Iwouldapologize,but…”
“Youdon’tcare.It’sokay.
Don’tworry.You’retotallyforgiven.”Shecameforward,herstepsfarquieter
now.Myeyesnarrowed.“Iwouldn’tcareeitherifIwaschainedtoawallinan
undergroundcell,allaloneand—”Shecrouchedbeforeme,thesidesofhergown
partingtorevealalong,lethaldaggerstrappedtoonethighandashorter
daggersheathedtotheshaftofherboot.Bothbladeswereblack.Shadowstone.
Shegavetheairadaintysniff.“Stinky.Yousmelllikerot.Andnotthefun
kindthatusuallyaccompaniestheCraven.”Shepaused.“Oranightofbadlife
choices.”
Istaredather.
Hergazedroppedtomybandaged
hand.“Ithinkyouhaveaninfection.”
Iprobablydid,butwasitthe
handortheCravenbite?“So?”
“So?”Hereyeswidenedbehind
thepaintedmask,causingthewhitetostandoutstarkly.“Ithoughtyou
Atlantiansdidn’tsufferfromsuchmortalailments.”
“Doyouexpectmetobelieve
thatyouhaven’tbeenaroundinjuredAtlantiansbefore?”Iheldherstare.“That
I’mthefirstyou’veseenhere?”
“You’renotthefirst,butI
don’tnormallygoneartheQueen’spets.”
Mylipspeeledbackagainstmy
fangs.“Imaybechained,butIamnopet.”
Thewingontheleftsideofher
faceroseassheliftedabrow.“Isupposenotwhenyoumakesuchgrowlysounds.
Ifso,you’dbethekindofpetonewouldneedtoputdown.”
“Isthatwhyyou’rehere?”
Shelaughed—andIstiffened.Her
laugh.Itsounded…“Youaresosuspicious.That’snotwhyI’mhere,”shesaid,
andIblinked,shakingmyhead.“Honestly,I’mkindofbored.AndImadea
promise.”TheHandmaidenroseswiftly,glancingatthehipbath.“Ifyouthink
you’renotinneedofabath,Ihatetobetheonetotellyou,butyouare.”
“Ihavenoplanstomakeuseof
that.”
“Whatever.It’syourlife.Your
stench.”
“Whatkindofpromisedidyou
make?”
“Anannoyingone.”The
Handmaidenwenttotheothersideofthehipbathandthenloweredherselfto
herknees.Shetappedherfingersoverthesurfaceofthewater,creatingsmall
waves.“Thoughbathingmayhelpwiththatwoundofyours.”
WhenIdidn’tanswer,shetapped
thewatersomemoreassheeyedmewiththosepale,barelyblueeyes.“Isit
becauseyouneedtofeed?”
CouldIfeedoffRevs?Ididn’t
knowifitwouldbetheequivalentoffeedingoffamortal.Hell,Iwasn’tsure
iftheyweredeadoralive.Orreallywhatthefucktheywere.
Herheadtiltedtotheside,
sendingamessofhairtumblingoveranarm.“Ibetthat’sit.Yourbrothergets
crankywhenheneedstofeed.”
Everythinginmezeroedinonher.
“Whereismybrother?”
“Here.There.Probably
everywhereinsteadofwherehe’ssupposedtobe.”
Myjawclenchedbecausethat
soundedliketheMalikIknew,butIwasbeginningtothinkthattheprocessof
becomingaRevaddledthebrainandwaswhytheotherHandmaidensdidn’tspeak.
Whatwascomingoutofhermouthnowwaspurenonsense.“Youmustbearoundhim
alottoknowwhenheneedstofeed.”
Herheadstraightened.“Not
really.”
“Thenthatwouldbeastrange
thingtonotice.”
“I’mjustobservant.”Thoseeyes…
Theyweresodull,nearlylifeless.Fuckingeerietolookuponfortoolong.
“AndI’malsonottryingtogethimkilled,whichwouldhappenifIwasaround
himalot.”
“AreHandmaidensnotallowedto
spendtimewiththoseoftheoppositesex?”
Sheletoutanotsodelicate
snort.“Handmaidensareallowedtofraternizewithanymembersofanysextheysee
fit.”
“ThenisitbecauseyourQueenwants
Malikalltoherself?”Mystomachchurned.
“Shehasnointerestinhim.”
Herexpressionhadn’tchanged,butInoticedthatshegrippedtheedgesofthe
tub.Interesting.“Notinalongtime.”
Ididn’tbelievethatforone
second.
TheHandmaidendippedherarminto
thewaterandbeganscrubbingatherskin.Theoddsymbolswerequickto
disappear.Shemovedontotheotherside.
“Didyouknowthesetunnelsand
chambershavebeenhereforhundredsandhundredsofyears?”Risingfromthe
tub,herfingersdrippedwaterasshewalkedacrossthechamber.“Theyexisted
whenthegodswalkedamongmen.Ofcourse,they’vebeenexpanded,addedto,and
nowtravelthelengthofthecity,butthesewalls…”Sheplacedherpalm
againstthedampstone.“Thesewallsareancient,andonlyafewhaveeverbeen
allowedinsidethem.”
Iknewaboutthechambers
undergroundbeneaththeAscended’shomes,butnotanytunnelsthattraveledthe
lengthofthecity.“Idon’tgiveafuckaboutthesewalls.”
“Youshould.”Shelookedoverher
shoulderatme.“Godswalkedthesetunnels.AsdidthePrimals.Theywalked
othertunnelsinothercities,connectingdoorwaysandcreating
magicalwardsmadeofPrimalessencethatcouldkeepthingsout—orin.”
Iwatchedherrunherpalmover
theunevenstone,wonderingexactlywhatinthehellshewastalkingabout.
“Agodbornamortal,carrying
thebloodofthePrimalofLifeandthePrimalofDeathuponAscensionwas
foretold,”theHandmaidenwhispered.“Orsotheysay—andtheysayalot.Either
way,shebrokethosePrimalwardswhensheAscendedintohergodhood.”
Itwasclearthatshewas
speakingaboutPoppy.
Sherestedhercheekagainstthe
wall.“Andanythingthatwaskeptincannowgetout.”Eyesnotsodullmet
mine.“Twoquestionsremain.Whenandwhere.Notevenheknows.”
Ididn’tevenknowwhattosay
toanyofthat,butIcaughthowherlipcurledwhenshesaidhe
“Who?”
“Callum.”
“ThegoldenboyRev?”
Herlaughwasthroatier,more
real,andstrangelyfamiliar.“He’sold.Realold.Becarefulofthatone.”
“Fuckhim.”Impatient,Ileaned
forward—fartherthanusualbecauseoftheloosenedchains.“Whatinthehell
areyouramblingonabout?AndwhatdoesithavetodowithPoppy’sAscension?”
“Idoramble,don’tI?Iansaid
Penellapherambles.”Sheturnedsharply,facingmeassheleanedagainstthe
wall.“Isthattrue?”
Myeyesnarrowed.“Why?Whydo
youwanttoknowthat?”
Hershoulderlifted.“Just
curious.”
“Oddthingtobecuriousabout.”
“Isittrue?”shepersisted.
“Doessheramble,too?”
Iunlockedmyjaw.“Herthoughts
tendtowanderabout…outloud.Frequentlyandsometimesrandomly.”
Thecornersofherlipsturned
upasshetoyedwithanedgeofstonebyherhip.“I…Ididn’tknowtheQueen
woulddothattoIan.I—”Herjawtightened.“Ididn’texpectthat.”
Ibelievedher.Onlybecausethe
lookofshockonherfaceandonmybrother’swhenthatbitchhadorderedIan
killedcouldn’thavebeenfabricated.“IwouldtellyouthatIwouldkill
Isbethforthat,butmyQueenisagod.Shewillkillher.”
Herfingersstilledonthe
stone.
“Yeah,IfiguredthatoutinOak
Ambler,”Itoldher.“She’sgoingtokillthatbitchforsure.”
Thefaintsmilereturned,
surprisingme,andIdidn’tthinkanythingcouldstillsurpriseme.“Isawherafterward.
Penellaphe.”
Mybreathing.Myheart…Stopped.
“Istayedbehind,figuringshe’d
beangryuponwaking.Andshewas.ShecameatOakAmbler,andsheispowerful.
Foramoment,IthoughtshewasgoingtodestroytheRiseandtheentirecity.”
Shecontinuedrubbingherfingersoverthesharpedgeofastone.“Butshestopped.
Maybeshe’snotlikehermother.”
“She’snot,”Isnarled.“There’s
noonelikeher.”
“You’reactuallyrightwhenyou
saythat.”Hergazeflickedtome.“Butyoudon’treallyknowher.Idoubtshe
evenknowsherself.”Herchindipped,andherstarechilledmyskin.“She
carriesthebloodofthePrimalofLifeandthePrimalofDeath.”
“Iknow.Sheknowsshe’sdescended
fromNyktos—”
“IfyouthinkthatGranddaddyis
thetruePrimalofLifeandthetruePrimalofDeath,then
youknownothing.”
Myeyesnarrowed.Whatwasshe
upto?NyktoswasthetruePrimalofLife.ThegodsRhainandRhahar
oversawthedead,butNyktoswasthePrimal.TheKingofGods.Thatmeanthe
wasthetruePrimalofDeath,too.“Theneducateme.”
“I’mnotthatbored.”
Shepushedoffthewall.“Plus,Ihavethingstodo.Peopletosee.Kill.
Whatever.IdidasIpromised.”Turning,shestartedfortheentrancebut
stopped.Shelookeddown.“TheQueenhasherplans.”
“Thewholeremakingtherealms
bullshit?”
“Toremakesomething,onemust
firstdestroyit.”
Acoldwindhitthelengthofmy
spine.“TheBloodQueenisnotthatpowerful.”
“Shemaynotbe.”The
Handmaiden’sbackwasunnaturallystiff.“Butsheknewhowtobringtolife
somethingthatwas.”
Poppy
Theconversationaroundmewasnothingmorethanahumas
Isatinthereceivingchamber.TheothersclusteredaroundHisaFa’Mar,oneof
theCrownGuard’scommanders,andthemapofOakAmblershe’dbeenworkingon.
Wordoftheremainingarmies’
advancementhadcomeshortlyafterwereturnedtoCauldraManor—intheformof
nineteendrakencrestingthePinelands.
Therehadbeenalotmorerunning
aboutandscreamingfromthelocals.They’donlycalmedwhenthedrakenhadlanded
aroundCauldraandinthepinessurroundingthemanor,doingnothingmorethan
watchingthemortalsscurryabout.
Icouldn’thelpbutwonderwhat
thedrakenthoughtofthereaction.Haditbeenlikethatwhentheywereawake
before?Orhadtheybeenaccepted?Thenagain,hadtheyonlyremainedin
Iliseeum?Ihadn’tthoughttoaskReaver.
Theirarrivalhadmomentarily
distractedmefromwhatIcarriedinthepocketofmysweatercoat.The
draken’sarrivalmeantwecouldexpectValynandtheremainingarmiestomorrow.
Iexhaledlongandslow.Wewere
rightonschedule.Thedayaftertomorrow,wewouldtakeOakAmbler,andthenI
wouldleaveforCarsodonia.
ForCasteel.
I’dmetwithVonettaafterthe
draken’schaoticarrivaltospeakabouttheCrownRegentposition.Sheaccepted,
althoughshewasn’tentirelyhappyabouttheideaofnotjoiningKieranandme.
Still,IthoughtshelookedforwardtobossingsomeoftheAtlantiansaround,
especiallyacertainauburn-hairedone,whowouldalsoremainwithher.I’d
alsospokenwithReaveraboutgoingtothecapital.He’dbeeninhisdraken
formandhadnoddedhislarge,hornedhead.
VonettaandNaillwerenotamong
usnow.They,alongwithEmil,hadgoneoutintothepinestotakecareofwhat
hadbeeninthatwoodenbox.Butbeforethat,we’dspenthourshashingoutwhat
wastocomeafterseizingOakAmbler.
We’ddecidedthatmovingwith
anytypeoflargegroupwoulddrawtoomuchattention.Conversationgrew…tense
whenIannouncedthatonlyKieranandReaverwouldbetravelingwithme.None
oftheotherswerethrilledaboutthat,eachdemandingtheyaccompanyus.But
whatwe’dplannedwastoorisky.
Isbethwantedmealive.
Thatdesiredidn’textendto
anyoneelse,andIalreadywasn’thappyaboutendangeringReaverandKieran.I
wouldn’tbudgeonthis.
AndbeingthatIwasQueen,I
didn’thaveto.
Besides,IwantedVonettato
haveallthesupportpossibleincaseshegotanypushback.Andgiventhat
Aylardwasn’tpartofanyoftheseconversations,thatwaslikely.Shewould
haveNaillandDelano,EmilandPerry,alongwithHisaandthewolven,tosupport
her.WhatshewouldbedoingwasjustasimportantaswhatIwouldbeembarking
on.
Whatwealldidagreeon
wasthatitwasseriouslyunlikelythattheQueenwouldholdCasteelinthesame
locationasbefore.Isbethwassmarterthanthat.
Findinghimwouldbeoneofthe
mostdifficultpartsofourplan.WayfairCastleitselfwasextraordinarily
large,withsimilarundergroundchambersasRedrock.ItwaswhereI’dseen…my
fatherwhenIwasyounger.ButIdidn’tthinkCasteelwouldbeheldthere,
either.Explainingawaywhatappearedtobeacavecattoawanderingnobleor
ayounggirllikemewaseasierthanexplainingacaptiveAtlantianKing.
ThentherewastheWayfairland
withitsgardensandgrottos,sprawlingestates,andprotectedforests.Notto
mentionthecityitself,withitsendlessplacestohidesomeone.
Itwouldbelikesearchingfora
ghost.
Feelingtheoutlineofthering
insidethepocket,Ilookeduptothehall.
Allthatyouandthosewho
followwillfindhereisdeath.
MyfingersstilledastheDuke’s
wordsresurfaced.“Excuseme,”Imurmured,rising.
BothKieranandDelanoglanced
overatme,butneithermadeanymovestofollow.Iknewonewouldeventually,
though.Iwalkedoutintothedrafty,dimhallandtothedoorattheotherend
ofthemanor.
Ienteredthesmallsittingarea
ofthesuiteandintothebedchamber,sectionedoffbyheavydrapes.Movingto
thesmalltable,Isawthecardfromthebox.Ihadn’treadityet.
Ididnow.
BelovedDaughter,
Itpainsmetoknowthatthis
giftwillbringyouheartache.Forthat,Iamdeeplysorry,butyouleftmeno
choice.What’sdoneisdone.Helives.Donotforgetthatwhilewelooktothe
manytomorrowstogetherbutapart.Thefutureofthekingdomsandthatofthe
TrueCrownoftheRealmsdependsonus.
Love,
Mother
Thewordsdidn’tchange,no
matterhowmanytimesIreadthem.Ididn’tgainanysuddenunderstandingof
howshecoulddosomethinglikethisandthenapologize.Orhowshecouldcarry
outsuchterribledeedsasifshehadnocontroloverthem.She’dblamedmefor
Ian’sdeath.Andnow,sheblamedmeforherhurtingCasteel?I’d
provokedher.I’dguidedherhand.Butitwasstillherhand.
Mother
Icouldn’tbelieveshe’dsigned
itthatway.
Footstepsneared,andIlooked
uptoseeVonettasweepingthecurtainthatdividedthechambersaside.
“Kieransaidyouwereprobably
here,”shesaid,lettingtheheavyclothdriftbackintoplace.“It’sbeen
takencareof.We…burnedit.”
Iinhaledthroughthesting.
“Thankyou.”
“Iwishyouwerethankingmefor
somethingelse.”
“Me,too,”Isaid.
“Ofcourse.”Vonettapeeredover
myshouldertolookatthenote.“Thereissomethingmajorlywrongwiththat
woman.”
“Isaidthesameearlier.”
“Itmakesyouwonderifshe’s
alwaysbeenlikethis.Andifso,whatinthehelldidMalecseeinher?”
“Idon’tknowifshewasalways
likethisoriflosingMalecandtheirsondidthistoher.”Ithoughtofwhat
Reaverhadsaidearlier.“Ithinkit’spossiblethatMalecwasattractedto
that.”
“Heseemedlikearealgem,”she
replied,andawrygrintuggedatmylips.“Iwantedtoaskhowyou’redealing
with…well,witheverythingrelatedtoherbeingyourmother.Butit’salways
seemedlikeastupidquestion.Youknow?LikeIknowyou’renoteverything
isfinewhenitcomestoher.”
“It’snotastupidquestion.”
“Really?”Twoarchedbrowsrose
assheleanedagainstthewall.
Inodded.“Tobehonest,Idon’t
knowhowI’mdoingwhenitcomestoher.AllIknowisthatI…Idon’tthinkof
herasmymother.Becauseshewasn’t.”Iglanceddownatthecard.“Iusedto
strugglewithwhoshewastomeandthemonstershewastoCasteelandeveryone
else.Idon’tanymore.NotafterIan.”Mychesttightened,andIswallowed.
“YoutalkedtohimwhenhecametoSpessa’sEnd?”
“Yeah.”Vonettapressedherlips
together.Severalmomentspassed.“Ihaven’tmetatonofAscended.Icancount
thenumberIhaveontwohands.ButhewasnothinglikeIexpected.He
waspolite—andnotthefakekind.Hewas.…warm,evenifhisskinwasn’t.
Doesthatmakesense?”
Inhalingashakybreath,I
nodded.
“Andhewaskindofflirty,but
notinacreepyway.”Asmallsmileappearedbriefly.“WhenhecametoSpessa’s
End,lookingforyou,theGuardiansdidn’twanttolethimleave,believinghe
wasathreat.Iwatchedoverhim,andhespentthetimetellingmeastory
aboutStygianBayandtheTemplesofEternity—howmanyoftheTemplesinSolis
hadbeenaroundsincethegodswalkedtherealm.Theyweren’tjustplacesof
worshipbutalsoplacesofprofoundpower,abletoneutralizegods.Healso
saidtheyweregatewaystoIliseeum,wheregodsferriedmortalsthrough.”She
pickedupabraid,runningitbetweenherfingers.“WhichIdon’tthinkis
remotelytrue.Butwhathesaidwasinteresting.Hehadawayoftelling
thestorywhereyoucouldn’thelpbutgetinvestedinit.Imean,hehadme
totallyhookedonthistaleaboutagirlpickingflowerswhohadbeenstartled
byagod,fallingtoherdeathfromsomecliff.Anyway,Iantoldmethathe
usedtotellyoustories,too,whenyouwerelonelyorupset…orwhenhewasbored—which
heclaimedwasoften.”
Iknewthatstory.Sotoriaand
theCliffsofSorrow.Ianhadshareditwithmeinoneofthelettershe’d
writtenafterhisAscension.“Hecouldspintalesatthedropofahat.Take
somethingcommonlikeanold,dullswordandtransformitintooneoncewielded
bythefirstmortalking.”Mylaughtrembled.“Hehadthewildestimagination.”
Iliftedmygazetothegentlyripplingcurtainsoverthewindows.“Iwonderif
CoralenaandLeowerehisparents.ButsinceshewasaRevenant,Idon’teven
knowifshecouldhavechildren.Hell,I’mnotsure…”Iopenedmy
mouth,closedit,andtriedagain.“Idon’tknowifmyfatherwaswilling.If
theyputhiminthatcagebeforeorafterme.”
Vonetta’sdisgustreachedme,
mirroringmine.“Wewillfindhim,too.”
“Wewill.”Withmymindshifting
fromIantomyfatherto…toCasteel,Isummonedtheeather,justatinyspark
thattooklittleenergy,thenletitflickfrommyfingertips.Therewereno
shadowsinthesilveryglowasitwashedoverthenote.Iletwhatremainedof
thecard,nothingmorethanash,fallfrommyfingers.“Andwewillmakesure
shecannothurtanyoneelse.”
Chapter8
Iwasdreaming.
Thoughnotanightmarefroma
long-agonightoronebirthedfromtoo-recentanguishandrage.
IknewthatassoonasIdrifted
outofthenothingnessofsleepandfoundmyselfinadifferentplace.Onethat
didn’tevenfeellikesomethingfromadreambecauseeveryoneofmysenseswas
awakeandaware.
Warm,churningwaterlappedat
mywaistandbubbledalongmyinnerthighs.Heavyandhumidairsettledagainst
thebareskinofmyarmsandbreastslikeasatinveil.Waterfizzedaroundthe
clusterofrocksjuttingfromthesurfaceoftheheatedpool.Wispsofsteam
dancedindappledsunlight,twiningaroundlilacsthatsmotheredthewallsand
stretchedacrosstheceiling,perfumingtheairofCasteel’scavern.
Ididn’tknowwhyIdreamedof
thisplaceinsteadofsomethinghorrific,orhowI’devenbeenabletoreach
suchadeeplevelofsleepontheeveofbattle.MaybeitwasknowingthatI
wouldsoonbeonmywaytoCarsodonia,replacingthekeeningsenseof
desperationwithpurpose.PerhapsthathadgivenmethepeaceofmindI’d
neededtotrulyrestanddreamofsomethingpleasantandbeautiful.
Iskimmedmyhandthroughthe
water,smilingasittickledmypalm.Closingmyeyes,Iletmyheadfallback.
Watertuggedonthetailofmybraidasdamp,sweetlyscentedair…stirred
Awarenessboredownonmy
shoulders,sendingashiverthroughmeasmyhandsstilledandmyeyesopened.
Tinybumpsbrokeoutallovermyskin.Iinhaledsharply—andthebreathsnagged
asadifferentscentreachedme.Onethatremindedmeof…ofpineanddecadent
spice.
“Poppy.”
Myheartstumbled.Everything
stopped.Thatvoice.Thatrich,deepvoicethatcarriedaslight
musicallilt.Hisvoice.Iwouldrecognizeitanywhere.
Iwhippedaround,sendingthe
waterintoahissingfury.Myentirebeingtensed,andthenashudderrocked
itswaythroughme.
Isawhim
Inthedampheatofthecavern,
Isawhissoft,blackhairalreadybeginningtocurlagainsttheslashofhis
brows,andthesandy-hued,highcheekbones—onesthatappearedsharperthanI
remembered.Butthatfullmouth…Ishudderedagain.Hismouthwasslightlyparted
asifhe’dinhaledandcouldn’ttakeanotherbreath.Ashadowofabeardranalong
hischeeksandhisstrong,proudjaw,givinghimanunfamiliar,rugged,and
wildlook.
Hestoodbeforeme,thewater
lazilyswirlingagainstthosefascinatingindentsonhisinnerhips.Hewasas
bareskinnedasIwas,thetightlyrolledmusclesofhisabdomenandthe
delineatedlinesofhischestappearingmoredefined,starkerthanIremembered.
Butitwashim.
Myfirst.
Mylast.
Myeverything
“Cas?”Hisnamecamefromthe
depthsofmyverysoul,anditstungandburnedtheentirewaypastmylips.
Histhroatworkedonaswallow.
I’dneverseenhiseyessobright.Theywerelikepoolsofpolishedgold.“Poppy.”
Ididn’tknowwhomovedfirst.
Ifitwashimormeorifwebothmovedatthesamemoment,butitwasonlya
heartbeat—lessthanone—andthenhisarmswerearoundme.Thefeelofhishot,
wetskinagainstminewasashockbecauseIfelthim,fromthehard
fleshofhischesttothecoarsehaironhislegs.Graspinghischeeks,I
marveledatthesensationofthepricklygrowthagainstmypalms,somethingI’d
neverfeltonhimbefore
Ifelthim.
Heheldmetightly,leavingno
spacebetweenus.Leavingnowayformetonotfeelthathetrembled
asbadlyasIshook.Hishandslidupthelengthofmyspine,leavingaseries
ofhot,tightshiversinitswake.Hesankhishandintomybraid.
Intherecessesofmymind,I
knewthiswasonlyadream,evenifnothingaboutanyofthisfeltlikeadull
replicaconcoctedfrommydesperate,lonelymind.Notwhenthecold,achingly
vastholesinmychestfilledwiththefeelofhim—allofCasteel
“Poppy,”herepeated,hisbreath
againstmylips.Andthenhismouthwasonmine.
Hislips—oh,gods,Idrownedat
thefeelofthem.Ididn’tthinkanymemorycouldcapturetheunyielding
hardnessorthelushsoftness.Ididn’tthinkanymemorycouldrecreatetheway
hekissed.
BecauseCasteelkissedasifhe
werestarving,andIwastheonlysustenancehe’deverdesired.Everneeded.He
kissedasifitwerethefirstthingheevertrulywantedandthelastthinghe
needed.
Islidmyhandsintohisdamp
hair,shakingatthefeelofthestrandssiftingthroughmyfingers.The
edgeofasharpfangdraggedacrossmylowerlip,heatingmybloodintheway
onlyhecould.Ikissedhimback,desiresparkingandignitingasapulsing
twistofpleasurecurledthemuscleslowinmystomach.Theintensityofit
causedmetojerkagainsthim—againstthehot,hardlengthofhim—andfrenzied
needexploded.
Casteelgroanedashisfingers
curledintomyhair,andthoselong,druggingkissesbecameshorter,rougher.
Hislipstuggedatmine.Myteethclashedwithhis.Thesekindsofkissestore
throughme,leavinglittlefiresintheirwake—flamessuretoconsumeme,even
inadream.AndIknewthatwasallthiswas.Adream.ArewardIdidn’tthink
Ideservedbutwouldgreedilytake,nonetheless.BecauseIneededhim.Needed
tofeelwarminsideagain.
AndwithCasteel,Iwasalways
likefleshandfire.
Iloopedmyarmaroundhisbroad
shouldersasIdraggedmyhanddownhisface,histhroat,towhereIfelthis
pulsepounding.Myhanddroppedtohisshoulder.“Please.Touchme.Takeme.”
Thewordsthatspilledfrommymouthcarriednotaintofshame.Therewasno
roomforthatinthisfantasy.Noawkwardness.Nohesitationorsecond-guessing.
Justneed.Justus.Onlythesestolenminutesmattered,eveniftheyweren’t
real.“Please,Cas.”
“Youknowbetter,Poppy.You
don’teverhavetobeg.”
Anotherfull-bodyshuddertook
meatthesoundofhisvoice—atthewordsreplacingthelastonesandthe
hoarselyshoutedpleas.
“Youhaveme,”hesworeagainst
myswollenlips.“Always.”
“Andforever,”Iwhispered.
Heshookevenharder.“Ineeded
tohearthat.YouhavenoideahowbadlyIneededtohearyou.”He
reclaimedthedistancebetweenus,capturingmylipswithhis.“Didmyneed
somehowconjureyouintoreality?Idon’tknow.Ican’tthinkbeyondthis.
Beyondthewayyoufeel.”Hissharpfangstuggedagainstmylipsoncemore,
scatteringmythoughts.“Notwhenyou’rehere,inmyarms.”
Thekissdeepenedagainashis
tonguetouchedmine,sendingaflurryofswirling,heatedsensationsthrough
me.“NotwhenIcantasteyou.Feelyou.”Hisshakinghandslidovermyarm,grazing
thesideofmybreastandthenmywaist.Hekeptgoing,theroughcalluseson
hispalmsjustasIremembered.Hishandslippedunderthewaterandclosed
aroundmyhip,hisfingerspressingintothefleshthere.Hedraggedhishand
backup,cuppingittomybreastasaprimitive,rawsoundlefthim.Igasped.
“Ifeelthis.”Heranhisthumb
overtheachingtipofmybreast,andthenhispalmskimmedmywaistagain,
delvingoncemoreunderthewater.Whenhegrippedmyhipthistime,hetugged
meupandagainsthimandhisrigidlength.“Canyoufeelme?Tellme.Canyou
feelme,Poppy?”
“Ifeelyou.”Myfingerstangled
inhishairasIrockedagainsthim.Iwantedtofeelhimmovinginsideme.I
wantedtofeelthatdelicioustugandpull.“You’reallIfeel,evenwhen
you’renotwithme.Iloveyousomuch.”
Hishoarsecryswallowedmineas
hepulledmedownontohisthicklength—
Ashockwentthroughme.The
feelofhimstretchingme,fillingmewaspurepleasurewithawickedbite.An
intensesensationthatwas…
Istiffened,mypulseracing.
Thefeelofhim,theenormouspresence…Gods,itfeltreal.
Likereallyreal.
Ilookeddownatus—atthehardened
tipsofmybreastsandthefinedustingofhaironhischest.Atwheremysoft
bellymethisharderone.Iwatchedhimbreathequicklyandraggedly.Iwatched
himshakeasheheldhimselfstillwhiledeepinsideme.Ifelthim
twitchwherewewerejoinedunderthechurningwater.Icontinuedstaringat
us—athimandhisbody.Theleannesstohisframethathadn’tbeenthere
before.Thethinmarksthatslowlyappeared,spreadingacrosshischestbeside
thenumerousfadednicksandcutsofhisoldscars.Myalreadypoundingheart
spedup.
“Isthis…isthisreal?”I
whispered.
Casteelliftedhishead,hisheated
starepiercingmine.Hisarmtightenedaroundmywaist.“Youreyes,”hesaid,his
voicethickandhusky.“Thereisn’tjustanaurabehindthepupils.Thereare
streaksofsilverpiercingthegreen.”Confusionpinchedthetenselinesofhis
face.“I’veneverseenthemlikethis.”
Thewayhedescribedthem
remindedmeofsomething.Ofher.TheConsort.Thebackofmyneck
cooledrapidly.Ibreathedindeeplyandcaughtthescentofsomethingelse
beneaththelilacandCas’slush,pinespice.
Themustyscentofdamp,stale
air.
Thechillinmyskinspread,but
hisfelthotter.Feverish.“Doyoufeelthat?”Ishiveredasgoosebumpsbroke
out.“I’m…I’mcold.”
“I…”Hetrailedoffashishead
jerkedatthesoundof…Itwasn’tfallingwater.Itwasaheaviersound.Aclanking
Mybreathcaught.Istaredat
him—reallylookedathim.Theshadowofabeard.Thehollowsunderhis
cheekbones.Thecutsinhisskin.Isawthemomenttheconfusionclearedhis
radiant,goldeneyes.
Andwonderpouredintothem.“Heartmates,”
hechokedout.
“What—?”
Casteelkissedmeagain.Hard.
Consuming.Hekissedmeasifhecoulddrawmeintohim.Whenhismouthleft
minethistime,hedidn’tgofar.“Gods.Poppy,Imissyousobadithurts.”
Pressureclampeddownonmychest.Tearsrushed
tomyeyes.“Cas…”
Hefoldedbotharmsaroundme
andheldmetighterthanbefore,butIwasevencolder.Hetrembledashe
droppedhisheadtomyshoulder.Hischestrosewithanunsteadybreathagainst
mine.
“Poppy,”hebreathed,kissingmy
cheek,thespacebelowmyear,andthenmyshoulder.Hepressedhismouthto
thesideofmyneck.“Mybeautiful,braveQueen.Icouldstayhere,holdingyou,
forever.”
Oh,gods,Iknewthiswasending.
Panicexploded.Iwasn’tready.Iwasn’t.“Don’tleaveme.Don’tleaveus.I
loveyou.Please.Ilove—”
“Findmeagain.”Hishead
lifted,andhiseyes…theywerenolongerbright,hisfeaturesnolongerclear.Things
werehazy,andIcouldn’t—oh,gods,Icouldn’tfeelhim.“Findme.I’llbe
waitinghere.Always.I—”
Iwokewithoutwarning,myeyes
wideningasIgulpedinair,myheartracing.
Ittookseveralmomentsformy
thoughtstoslowenoughformetorecognizethemoonlight-kissedcanvaswalls.A
finesheenofsweatdampenedmyskin,andIsworeIcould…Icouldstillhear
thefizzingwaterofthecavern.
I’llbewaitinghere.Always.
Ishuddered,closingmyeyesand
tryingwitheverythinginmypowertogobacktothecavern.Tohim.Butit
didn’twork.Icouldn’tputmyselfbackintothedream,butIstillfelthim.
Thewarmthinsidemewasstillthere,slowtofade,aswastheacutethrobbing.
Myhandstingled—myentirebodydid.Asifthetouchhadbeenreal.Asifthe
feelofhim,hotandhardagainstmeandinsideme,hadbeenreal.
Butithadn’tbeen.
Slowly,Ibecameawareof
Kieran’sweightbesidemeandhissoft,muffledsnores.Hewascurledagainst
myback,asleepinhiswolvenform.Thankthegodsmydreamhadn’twokenhim.I
turnedmyhead,spyingCasteel’sringonthenightstand,bathedinthefaintmoonlight.
Istartedtoreach—
Ascentmadeitswaytome.
Onethatdidn’tmakesense.
Grabbingmylooselybraided
hair,Iinhaleddeeply.Thescentwasunmistakable.
Pineandlushspice.
Andsweet,fragrantlilac.
Shockrolledthroughme.I
jerkedupright,startlingKieran.Heliftedhisheadandlookedoverhisback
towardme.
Histhoughtsbrushedmine,
woodsyandrich.Poppy?
Icouldn’tanswerhim.Notwhen
myheartthundered.Ilookeddownatthesectionofbraidthatsmelledof
lilac.Howwasthispossible?Therewerenolilacsaroundhere.Andifthere
were,thatwouldn’texplainhowIcouldsmell…Casteel.AndIdid.Itcouldn’t
bemyimagination.
Concernstretchedoutfromthe
wolven,andIfeltthebedshiftsuddenly.Kieranclosedhishandaroundmine.
Thetouchofhisverymortalskinagainstminerattledmeoutofmythoughts.I
lookedathim,seeingawholelotofbareskin.
“Poppy?Whatisit?”Hisgaze
searchedmine.“Hassomethinghappened?Talktome.”
Iswallowed.“I…”
“Didyouhaveanightmare?”
“No,”Isaid,andKieran
relaxed.“Itwasadream.About…aboutCasteel.Itwasn’tabadone,butit
wasn’tlikeanyI’veeverhad.”
“Asexdream?”
“What?”Idroppedmy
braid.
“Youhadasexdream.”
Istaredathisshadowed
features,stunnedforasecond.“Whatmakesyoueventhinkthat?”
“Idon’tthinkyouwantmetoanswer
that,”hesaid.“Itwillembarrassyou.”
“How—?”Thenithitme.Wolvenand
theirgodsdamnsenseofsmell.Iliftedmychin,refusingtobe
embarrassed.“WhydoyouthinkI’veneverhadasexdreambefore?”
Kieranliftedashoulder.“I
figureyoudon’thavealotofsexdreams.”
Iblinked.“Why?”
“Soitwasasex
dream?”
“Oh,mygods.Whyareweeven
talkingaboutsexdreamswhenyou’resittingbesidemenaked?”
“Doesmynuditybotheryou,meyaah
Liessa?”
Itdidn’t.
Well,notexactly.
Atthispoint,Iwasgettingused
tothebareskinbuffetthatcamewithbeingaroundsomanywolven—and,
apparently,draken.Butrightnow,whenIcouldstillfeelCasteelinsideme,
Kieran’snudityfelt…different.Notbadorwrong.Justdifferentina
wayIcouldn’texplain.Butitmademethinkofwhathe’dwitnessedwhenI
awakenedaftermyAscension.He’dbeeninthatroom,stoppingmefromtaking
toomuchblood,holdingmebythewaistasIrodeCasteel…
Mybreathandbodysnagged,
and…deargods,Ireallyneededtostopthinkingingeneral.
OnesideofKieran’smouthcurved
upinresponsetomynon-answer.AteasinggrinIsawinthedelicatedanceof
moonlightmakingitswaythroughthewindow.
Myeyesnarrowed.“You’re
teasingme.”
Hereachedover,gentlytugging
onthesleeveofmyshirt—well,hisshirtthatI’dhelpedmyselfto
whiletheoneIsleptinwasstilldryingafterbeinglaundered.“Iwould
never.”
Icrossedmyarms.“I’mbeing
serious.Thedreamwastooreal.”
“Dreamscanfeellikethat
sometimes.”
“Thiswasdifferent.Here.”I
grabbedmybraid,shovingittowardhim.“Smellmyhairandtellmewhatyou
thinkitsmellslike.”
“NotsomethingI’vebeenasked
todobefore,butthere’salwaysafirst,eh?”Kierantookmybraid,dipping
hisheadandinhaling.Isensedtheimmediatechangeinhim.“Ismell…”He
rockedbackafewinches,stillholdingontomybraid.“IsmellCas.”
Airpunchedoutofmylungs.
“Andlilacs,right?IdreamtofthecaverninSpessa’sEnd,andhewasthere.”
“Ismellthatand…andsomething…”Hefrowned.
“Musty?Idid,too,before
wakingup.EverythingfeltrealupuntiltheendwhenIstartedtogetcoldand
thennoticedthingsabouthim.Heappearedthinner.Heevenhadseveralweeks’
worthoffacialhaironhischeeks.Therewasamomentwhenhe…oh,gods.”I
swallowed.“Ithinkhethoughtitwasadream,too,butthenhesomehow
realizedthatitwasn’t.Hesaidmyeyeslookeddifferent.Thattherewasmore
silverinthem.Canyouseethemnow?”
“Theylooknormal—well,thenew
normal.Thataurabehindyourpupilsisthere,”Kierananswered,loweringmy
braidtomyshoulder.
“Whenhesawmyeyes,that’s
whenhe,like,becameawarethat…thatitwasn’tadream.”Ishookmyhead.“I
knowthatdoesn’tmakesense,butheknewitwasabouttoend.”
“Didhesayanything?”
“No.Justthathe…”Imiss
yousobadithurts.ThebreathItookwasbroken.Icouldn’tspeakthat
aloud.“Hesaid‘heartmates’butdidn’texplainwhy.Hetoldmeto
findhimagainandthathe’dbewaiting.”
“Heartmates,”Kieranmurmured,the
skinbetweenhisbrowspuckering.He’dalwayssuspectedthatCasteelandIwere
that—therareunionofheartsandsoulsthatwasrumoredtobemorepowerful
thananybloodline.
Ihadn’tbelievedKieranat
first,butthemomentCasteelandIhadstoppedpretending,I’dstopped
doubting.
Kieran’seyeswidenedsuddenly.“Holy
shit.”
Ijerked.“What?”
“Iheardmyfathersaysomething
onceaboutheartmates.Icompletelyforgotaboutit.”Kieranpickedupmybraid
againandbreatheddeeply.Whenhespoke,hisvoicehadbecomehoarse.“Hesaid
thatheartmatescouldwalkineachother’sdreams.”
Shockrippledthroughme.I
didn’tknowwhattothink,butifitwasreal?Goodgods…
Butwhywouldtonighthavebeen
thefirsttime?WasitbecauseI’dsleptdeeplyenough,andthenightmares
hadn’tfoundmefirst?OrwasitthefirsttimeCasteelhadbeenabletofind
me?
Andwhatifitwassomethingwe
coulddoagain?Iwouldn’twastetheopportunity.Icouldfindoutwherehewas
beingheld—ifheknew.Icouldmakesurethathewasokay—asokayashecould
be.Iwouldusethetimeforanythingotherthan…
TheheatedwordsI’dwhispered
againsthismouthfilledmymind,causingmystepstofalter.ThewayI’d
spokentohim—howI’dbeggedhim?Myentirebodyflushed.
“Whatareyou—?”Kieran
stiffenedatthesamemomentawaveoftinybumpsspreadacrossmyskin.An
intensechillsweptdownmyspine.ThePrimalessenceroaredtolife,throbbing
asasuddendarkandoilysensationsettledoverme,soakingintomyskinand
stealingmybreath.
Kieran’sheadsnappedbackto
me.“Youfeelthat?”
“Yeah.Idon’t…”Myheartlurchedinmychest.Iturnedmylefthandover,shudderingwithaburstofrelief.
Thegoldenswirlacrossmypalmshimmeredfaintly.“It’snot—”
Lightningstreakedacrossthe
sky,sobrightandintenseitlituptheinsideofthechamber,brieflyturning
nighttoday.Acrackofthunderfollowed,rattlingmychestandears.
KieranroseasIpulledmylegs
outfromundertheblanketandstood.Theborrowedshirtsliddownmythighsas
Igrabbedthedressingrobefromthefootofthebed,pullingiton.
Thesoundofboomingthunder
easedoff,givingwaytonervousneighingfromthenearbystables.Iwentto
thewindowandpulledthecurtainsback.Thickshadowsrolledacrossthesky,
obscuringthemoonlightandplungingthebedchamberintoneardarkness.
“Thisisodd,”KieransaidasI
turned,walkingtothedrapesthatsectionedoffthebedchambers.“It’snot
nearlywarmenoughforsuchastorm.”
Ahowlcamefromoutside,the
screamofroaringair.Windslammedintothemanor,liftingthecurtainsatthe
windows.Airpouredinunderthegaps,icyasthedarkesthoursofwinter,blowing
throughtheentireroom.Thegustpulledstrandsofhairfreefrommybraid,tossing
themacrossmyface.Anotherboltoflightningstreakedoverhead,andthe
wind…itsmelledlikestalelilacs.
ThatwaswhatVessahad
smelledlike.
Theheavycanvasbillowed,and
throughtheopening,IsawthemapsofOakAmblerthathadbeenbroughttothe
bedchamberearlierflythroughtheairlikebirdsmadeofparchment.
“Damnit,”Igasped,racingforward
intheblastofthunderthatfollowed.Mysock-coveredfeetslippedoverthe
stonefloorsasIdartedpastthechairs.Igraspedamapandthenanotheras
slipsofparchmentwhippedabout
Slammingthemapsdownonthe
lowtable,Igrabbedaheavyironcandleholderandplaceditsoitkeptthe
mapssafe.Windspunthroughthechamber,throwingthedoorsopenasboltsof
lightcontinuedrippingacrossthesky,oneafteranother,eachchargingthe
air.Theeatherinmychestandmyblood…itstartedtovibrate—
Ilookeddownasthetableunder
myhandsbegantotremble.Acrossfromme,thetableusedforprivatedining
shook,rattlingthepitchersandemptyglassesonthetop.Chairsscraped
acrossthefloor,topplingoverbehindmeastherumbleofthundercamefrom
aboveandbelow.
Anoutlineofafigurefilled
thechamber’sopeningaslightninglitthesky,illuminatingNaill’sfamiliar
features.“Areyouallright?”hedemanded.
“Ithinkso!”Ishoutedoverthe
rumbling.“Areyou?”
“Iwill—”Themanorshuddered,
causingNailltothrowouthisarmstosteadyhimself.“Iwillbeoncethedamn
earthstopsshaking.”
Glancingatthewindow,Icaught
abriefglimpseofadarker,wingedshadowglidingpast.Adrakenlanded
outsidethemanor,itsimpactbarelyfelt.
“Weshouldn’tbeinhere,”
Kieranannounced,stridingoutfromthecurtained-offsection.
Iturned,stumbling.Inaflash
oflight,IsawKieranbuttoningtheflaponapairofbreeches.“Doyouthink
it’ssaferoutside?”
“Themanorcouldcomedown,”he
said.“AndthelastthingIwanttobeisburiedundertonsofstone.”
“Notsurethatsoundsworsethan
beinghitbylightning,”Isaid.
Kieransaidnothingashe
stalkedpastme,grabbingmyhand.Hekeptwalking,followingNaill.Wehurried
downtheseeminglynon-endinghall,outintothestormandthepathofalarge
draken.NailldrewupshortasReaverswepthiswingsback,tuckingthemclose
tohissides.
Ispun,seeingtherowsoftents
housingmostofAylard’sdivisionrippleviolently.Thedrakenturnedhis
diamond-shapedheadtowardthesky.Ifollowedhisgaze,myheartstoppingas
theflashesoflightrevealedwingedshapes.
“Whataretheydoingupthere?
They’llbestruckbylightning.”PullingfreefromKieran,Ichargedintothe
heavywindstowardReaver.Thegroundheavedviolently,startlingmeasanentire
sectionrolledlikeawave.Iwobbledalongtheunstablegroundasdustanddirt
explodedintotheair.Naillcaughtmyarmasmywillswelledthrough
me—theneedforthemtocomedown.
Reaverstretchedouthisneck,
lettingoutashrill,waveringsoundthatechoed.Hemadethecallagain,and
thankthegods,theotherdrakenheededhisorder.Theystartedtodescend,two
andthenonemorelandingaroundthemanor—
Abrightflashoflighterupted,
butitcamefrombelow—frominsidethemanor.
“Whatthehell?”Naillgasped.
Theboomthestreamoflight
madewhilehittingtheskywasdeafeningandstunning.Theboltarcedandthenerupted,
splittingintoseveralcracklingstreamsofsilvery-whitelightthatraced
acrosstheentireskyandupintothecloudsandthe—
Thedraken.
Someonescreamed.Ididn’tknow
ifitwasmeornotasthelightningstruckthedrakenabove.Theground
heaved,throwingmeintoNaill.Blindinglightwashedoverthetwistingand
writhingshapes.
Painflaredinmythroat.Iwas
screaming,butIwasn’ttheonlyone.Horrorswelledasthedrakenfell,wingslimp
andbodiestwistinginthewind,slammingintothepines,tents,oneafter
anotherafteranotherafteranother—
Thenitstopped.
Allofit.
Theearthceaseditstrembling.
Thelightningvanished,andthecloudsscattered,dispersing.Thewindcutoff.
Allofitjust…haltedasiffingershadbeensnapped.Therewasn’tevena
breeze.
Nodrakenwereinthesky.
Reavercalledoutagain,the
soundmournfulandlow.Iheardananswer,waveringandfullofanguish.
“No.No.No,”Iwhispered,
pullingfreeofNaillandwalking,thenrunning,towardthenearestcollapsed
tent.
Anudebodylayinthecenter.I
wouldn’thaveknownitwasadrakenifnotforthepatchesofdark,charredflesh
acrosstheankles,knees,andeveryotherplacetherewasajoint.
Shovingasidethefoldsof
canvas,Idroppedtomykneesbesidethedark-hairedmale.Ichanneledthe
throbbingeatherinmychestasIplacedmyhandsonhisarm.Ididn’t
hesitate.TherewasnotimetothinkaboutwhatIwasdoingwhenI’donlyseen
threelandandtherestfall.Heatrippleddownmyarms,spreadingacrossmy
fingersasIpressedthemintohisbiceps,feelingthefaintbutdistinct
ridgesthatwereshapedlikescales.Asilveryglowwashedoverthedrakenina
veinyweboflightand…andthenrolledoff,washinguselesslyontothetent.
MyheartlurchedasItriedagain,
pullingforthevenmoreofthePrimalessenceandpushingitevenharderinto
thedraken.
Itdidthesame,rollingright
offhim.
Kieranappearedontheother
side,touchingthedraken’sneck.Hisgazeliftedtomine.“He’sgone.”
Isuckedinabreath.“Ican
bringhimback.LikeIdidwiththatgirl.Ijustneedtotryharder.”
“Youcan’t.”Theraspyvoicesent
ashudderthroughme.Kieran’seyesmovedbeyondmetowhereReavermust’vestood
inhismortalform.“Youcanheal,butoncethesoulpartsabeingoftwo
worlds,youcannotrestorelife.”
Kieranrockedback,blinking
rapidlybeforeturninghisheadtoanothercaved-intent.Towheresoldiersand
wolvengatheredinmultipleclustersaround—
Theanguished,warblingcall
cameagain.
“No.”Iwhippedtoward
Reaverandstartedtorise.“Icantrywithanother.”
“Youcannot.”Reaverkneltat
thefeetofthefallendraken,hisheadbowed.
“Whynot?”Ishouted,angerand
disbeliefcrashingtogether.Myheartwaspounding,mybreathingheavy.
“OnlythePrimalofLifecan
restorelifetoanybeingoftwoworlds.”Thefinalityinhiswordswasapunch
inthegut.“They’regone.”
They’regone.
IstaredatReaverasthosetwo
wordscycled,overandover.Onlythreehadlanded,joiningReaver.Thatmeant…
Ashudderrockedme.Sixteenhad
beenintheair.Sixteendrakenwho’djustawakenedfromthegodsknewhowlong
todonothingbutdie?
MyhandsopenedandclosedasI
turnedinaslowcircle.“I’msorry.I’msosorry.”
“Thiswasn’tyourfault,”Kieran
argued,standing.
ButI’dwokenthem.I’dbrought
themhere.They’dfollowedme—
Allthatyouandthosewho
followwillfindhereisdeath.
Istoodontremblinglegs,eyes
andthroatburningasIsawthecracksintheground,somethinandothers
thickenoughtotripsomeoneup.Thefissuresspreadacrossthelandlikea
fragilewebandcontinuedalongthewallsofthemanor.Theroofhadnodamage
thatIcouldseeinthemoonlight.Itwasasifnoarcsoflighthadpierced
it.
Slowly,IturnedtowhereNaill
andseveralsoldiersstood,staringbeyondthecollapsedtents.Skinpimpling
withanotherchill,Ifollowedtheirstares.Beyondtheencampment,thepines
nolongerreachedforthestars.Thetreesandtheheavy,needledbrancheswere
bentforward,touchingtheground.Itlookedlikeamassivehandhadcomedown
uponthem,forcingthemtobow.IlookedatKieran.
“Idon’tknowwhatcausedthis.”
Hedraggedahanddownhisface.“I’veneverseenanythinglikethisbefore.”
“Butwe’vefeltit,”Naill
uttered,hisambereyesbright.“AfterthosebastardUnseentriedtokillyou,
andCashadyouinthatcabin.Thathappenedwhenyouwokeup,”hetoldus,and
Irememberedseeingthetreesoutsidethecabin.They,too,hadbeenbentto
theground.“ThesamekindofstormhappenedwhenyouAscendedtoyourgodhood.”
“Thiswasnotastorm,”Reaver
said,andIturnedtohim.“Itwasan…awakening.”
“Ofwhat?”Iasked.
Heliftedhishead,andhis
eyes…theyweren’tlikeearlier.Theywerestillavibrantshadeofblue,butthe
pupilswerethin,verticalslits.“Death.”
MyentirebodyjerkedasVessa’s
wordscamebacktome.“You,”she’dsaid.“Iwaitfor
you.Iwaitfordeath.”
Numbly,Istumbledbacktothemanor
andstartedwalking.Mypacepickedup.Thedressingrobestreamedoutfrom
behindmeasIran.
“Poppy!”Kieranshouted.
Iflewthroughthedoorintothe
manor,racingtowardtheGreatHall—tothechamberstwodoorsaway.
Kierancaughtuptome.“Whatare
youdoing?”
“Her.”Mystepsslowedaswe
passedthedarkroom.Behindus,IknewNaillandothersfollowed.“Vessa.”
Reachingthedoor,Igrabbedthe
handle.LikewiththechainsatthegatesofMassene,Imeltedthelocks.The
handleturned,andthedoorswungopen,lettingthepotentstenchofstale
lilacsslamintome.
Irockedtoahalt,inhaling
sharply.
Reddish-blacksmokefilledthe
chamber,swirlingaroundtherobedfigureofVessa—thesamekindofshadowy
smokethathaddriftedfromtheruby-adornedboxIsbethhadsent.
“Whatthefuck?”Kieranthrew
outhisarm,blockingme.
Vessa’smilky-whiteeyeswere
wideasshestaredatascorchmarkontheceiling,herarmsspread.Shestood
inthecenterofacircledrawnnotofashbutblood—hers.Itdrippedfromher
mangledwrists.Throughthechurning,thicktendrilsofsmoke,Isawasharpened
chunkofrocklyingnearherbarefeet.
Athick,oilyfeelingseeped
throughmyskin,andtheeatherinmychestpulsed.Inthehall,Iheardlow
snarlsofwarningfromthewolven.
“You,”Ibreathed,theessence
collidingwiththebuildinganger.Energyfloodedmyveins.“Youdidthis.”
Herlaughterjoinedthecyclone
ofsmoke
Thecornersofmyvisionturned
silvery-whiteasIbrushedKieran’sarmasideandsteppedintotheroom.
“Careful,”Kieranwarned,his
handfistinginthebackofmydressinggownasthepulsingsmokewhippedpast
myface,blowingstrandsofmyhairback.“Thisissomebadshit.”
“Magic,”Perryraspedfrom
behindus.“ThisisPrimalmagic.”
“Harbinger,”shecooed,
herfrailbodyshakingasthereddish-blacksmokewhirled.“Youweretoldwhen
youenteredthismanor,Queenwithacrownofgold,thatallthatyouandthose
whofollowwillfindhereisdeath.”Thereddish-blacksmokespunfaster,
spreading.“Youwillnotharnessthefireofthegods.Youwillwinnowar.”
Mybreathscorchedmylungsand
throatasrealizationsweptthroughme.“Isbeth,”Ihissed,chinloweringas
theessencesparkedfrommysplayedfingers.Ididn’tknowhowshewasableto
dothis,butIknewwhy.“Youdidthisforher.”
“IservetheTrueCrownofthe
Realms,”sheyelled.
Thefloorbegantoshakeasthe
smokefunneled,risingtotheceiling.Thatsmell—thestalelilacs—grewuntil
itnearlychokedme.ButitwasnotVessathatcausedthetrembling.
Itwasme
“Iservebywaiting—”
“Youserved,”Icuther
offastheedgesofmyroberippled.MywillformedinmymindasIliftedmyhand.
Pure,ancientpowerspilledoutfromme,spinningdownmyarm.Starlightcarrying
thefaintesttingeofshadowarcedfrommypalm,slammingintothesmoke.The
eatherrolledoverthestormandcutthroughit,strikingVessainthechest.
Shespunbackastheflashofeatherpulsedthroughthechamber,butonlyher
robesfelltothefloor.“Anddeathhascomeforyou.”
Chapter9
Iwalkedtowardthereceivingchamber,thedressingrobe
replacedbybreechesandmysweatercoat.Itwasthethickofthenight,hoursafter
thesixteendrakenhadbeenliftedontohastilymadepyressoNithe,oneofthe
remainingdraken,couldburntheirbodies.Istoodbythepyresuntilnothing
remainedbutash.PartofmefeltasifIwerestillthere.
Enteringtheroom,Iwenttowhere
Reaversat,stillinhismortalform,nudebutfortheblankethe’dwrapped
aroundhiswaistashesatonthefloor,inacorner.BeforeIcouldspeak,he
said,“ShesmelledofDeath.”
“Well,that’sbecauseshewas
dead,”Kieranreplied.
“No.Youmisunderstand.She
smelledoftheDeath,”Reavercountered.“IthoughtIsmelleditwhenwe
arrivedhere,onandoff,butitwasneverstrong.Notuntiltonight.”
Hispupilshadreturnedtonormal
ashewatchedmelowermyselfontothegroundbeforehim,theheavylengthof
mybraidfallingovermyshoulder.Itwasn’tjustthefourofus.ThoseI
trustedwerewithus,sittingorstanding,drinkingormotionless,stillheld
tightlybyshock.Iswallowedtheknotofsorrowgatheringinsideme—amixof
guiltandrealizationthatIshould’velistenedtoKieran.“Whatdoesthat
mean?”
“Thatwastheessenceofthe
PrimalofDeath.Hisstench.Oily.Dark.Suffocating,”Reaversaid,andIlooked
towhereKieranstoodafewfeetfromme.Thatwasexactlywhatwe’dbothfelt.
“Itdoesn’tmakesense.”
“YoumeanRhain?”Vonettaasked
fromwhereshesatononeofthechairs,herkneespressedtoherchest.
Reaverblinked.“What?”
“Rhain,”Emilstartedtoexplain,
hishandsonthebackofVonetta’schair.“TheGodofCommonMenand—”
“IknowwhoRhainis.Iknewhim
beforehewasknownasthegodyourecognizetoday,”hereplied.
Fromtheentryofthechamber,
surpriseflickeredthroughHisa,mirroringmine.“WhowastheGodofDeath
beforehim?”sheasked.
“TherewasnoGodofDeathbefore
him.TherewasonlythePrimalofDeath.”
IrememberedwhatNyktoshadshared
withme.“DidRhainreplaceoneofthePrimalsthatNyktossaidhadbecome
taintedandcorrupt?”
“Inaway.”Reaver’sheadtilted
tothesideashelookedattheceiling,hiseyesclosing.“Therewasonlyone
truePrimalofDeath,andthat—thestormandthewoman—feltlikehim.”
“NyktosisboththePrimalofLife
andDeath,”Kieransaid.
“Wrong.”
Kieranknelt.“I’mnotwrong.”
“Youare.”Reaverloweredhis
chin,hiseyesopening.“NyktoswasneverthetruePrimalofDeath.There
wasanotherbeforehim.HisnamewasKolis.”
“Kolis?”Naillrepeated,
steppingaroundEmil.“I’veneverheardthatname.”
“Youwouldn’thave.”
“Erasedhistory,”Imurmured,
lookingovermyshoulderattheothers.“RememberwhatItoldyouaboutwhatNyktos
said?AbouttheotherPrimalsandthewarthatbrokeoutbetweenthemandthe
gods?”IfacedReaver.“That’swhywewouldn’tknowhisname,right?”
Reavernodded.
“Icannotbetheonlypersonwho’s
sittingherethinkingthatthenameKolisisawfullysimilartoSolis,”
Vonettaremarked.
Shewasn’t.Ithadn’tpassedme
byeither.
“WhathappenedtothisKolis?”
Perryspokeup.TheAtlantianhadbeenquiettheentiretimeashestoodwitha
somberDelano.“OrtheotherPrimals?”
“SomeofthePrimalspassedon
toArcadia,aplaceverymuchliketheValebutwhichcanbeenteredwithout
death,”Reaversaid,andtheconfusionIfeltfromtheotherssaidtheywereas
unfamiliarwithArcadiaasIwas.
“Some?”Perryprodded.
“Some,”Reaverrepeated.“Others
wereended.Asintheydied.Werenomore.Afigmentofaforgottenpast.Dead.
Nolonger—”
“Igetit,”Istoppedhim.“Weall
getit.”
“Gladtohear,”thedrakenretorted.
“Kolisisasgoodasdead.”
Ididn’tlethistonegettome.
He’djustlostsixteendraken—somewhohadtobefriends.Maybeevenfamily.I
knewsoverylittleaboutReaver—aboutanyofthedraken.Andnow,mostofthem
weregone.Ashiverslithereddownmyspine.“Asgoodasdeadisn’tdead,
Reaver.”
“He’sbeendealtwith.Entombed
longago.Noneofuswouldbehereifhehadn’tbeen,”heinsisted.“Andthe
onlythingthatcould’vereleasedhimisthePrimalofLife.Thatwouldnever
happen.They…theywerethekindofenemiesthatgobeyondbloodandbone.”
Myheartratesettledalittle.
ThelastthinganyofusneededtodealwithwasarandomlyawakenedPrimalof
Death.
“Wait.”Reaver’sbrowsknitted
andthensmoothedashisheadjerkedtowardme.“Holyshit,Ishould’vecaught
ontothis.Admittedly,Idon’talwayspayattention.Youalltalkalotanddo
soincircles.”
IstartedtofrownwhenIheard
whatsoundedlikeachokedlaughcomingfromHisa.
“Youspokeofthese…creations
yourenemyhas.Onesthatcansurviveanyinjury?”Reaverasked.
“Yes.”Kieranplacedahandon
thefloor.
“Dotheycomebacktolife?”
Kierantiltedhishead.“What
elsedoessurviveanyinjurymean?”
“Notthesameasreturningto
life,”Reavershotback.
“Yes,theycomebacktolife,”I
jumpedin.
“AretheycalledRevenants?”
“Theyare.”Ilookedaroundthe
room.“I’msureI’vesaidthatbeforewhenyouwerearound.Morethanonce.”
“LikeIsaid,Idon’talwayspay
attention,”headmitted.“Letmeguess.They’rethethirdsonsanddaughters.”
“Yes.”Emildrewouttheword.
“Thatwouldbecorrect.Youknowwhatthesethingsare?”
“RevenantswereKolis’spet
project.Hiscrowningachievement,”Reaversaid.“Heusedmagictocreatethem—the
kindthatonlyworkedonthem.”
VonettastraightenedasI
thoughtoftheledgers.“Whyonlythem?”
“Becausethethirdsonsanddaughters
carryembersofeatherinthem.”
“Idon’tunderstand,”Kieran
said.“AndIdon’tthinkI’mtheonlyonewhodoesn’t.”
“Everythingineveryrealmdescends
fromaPrimal—well,besidesthedraken.Wecomefromnothing.Wejustareand
havealwaysbeen,”Reaversaid,andIhadnoideawhattomakeofthat—anyof
it
“Andmortalsdescendfroma
Primalandadraken,”Ifinishedforhim.
“FromEythos,thefirstPrimal
ofLife—alsoknownasyourgreat-grandfather.”Hepointedatme,andmyeyes
wentwide.“What?DidyouthinkNyktoswashatchedfromanegg?Hewasn’t.”
Ihadn’tthoughtthat.
Ijusthadn’trealizedtherewasanotherbeforehim.
“Anyway,Eythoshadahabitof
creatingthings.Somewouldsayitwasoutofcuriosityandathirstfor
learning,butIimagineitcamefromboredom.Whoreallyknows?He’sbeendead
foraverylongtime.Anyway,hewasclosetoNektas,evenbeforeweweregiven
mortalforms.Oneday,forwhateverreason—andI’mstillgoingwith
boredom—theydecidedtocreateanewspecies.Eythoslenthisflesh,andNektas
gavehisfire.Theresultwastheveryfirstmortal.Ofcourse,theyendedupcreating
more,andthose,andtheonesspawnedbythem,are,forthemostpart,ordinary.
ButwhatEythosandNektasdidmeantthatanemberofessenceexistsinall
mortals.It’s…dormant,forthemostpart.”
Reaverleanedforward.“Except
forinthethirdsonsanddaughters.Theemberisnotalwaysdormantthen.Why?
Idon’tknow.Perhapsit’sjustapure-numbersgamethat,aftersomanybirths,
theemberwouldbestronger.Whoknows?Itdoesn’tmatter.”
Perryappearedasifitmattered
alottohim.
“Eitherway,thosemortalsoften
haveuniquetalents,muchlikeyourgiftofsensingemotions.Itwouldn’tbeas
strongasyours.Mostwouldn’tevenrealizetheyweredifferent.They’renot
immortal.Theydon’tneedtofeed.Theyliveanddielikemortals.”
MyassumptionsonwhatIhad
seenintheledgerswerecorrect.“TheAscendedcopiedtheRite,then.”
Reavernodded,andarippleof
surprisewasfeltthroughout.“Atonetime,itwasanhonoredtraditionforthe
thirdsonsanddaughterstoenterIliseeumtoservethegods.Andbecausethe
emberwasstronginthem,theycouldbeAscendediftheychose,thusearning
theirimmortality.”
“Theyhadachoice?”Naillasked.
“Eythosalwaysgaveachoice,”
Reaversaid.“ButKolistookthosethirdsonsanddaughtersandmadetheminto
somethingneitherdeadnoralive—somethingelseentirely.Itwashisessence—his
magicasyourfriendwouldsay.”HenoddedinPerry’sdirection.“Iwasyoung
thenwhenallofthiscametoahead.WhenwhatKolishaddonewasdiscovered,
andthewarunfolded,Iwashiddenamongotheryounglings.Hewasdealtwith,
butnow…Now,someonehaslearnedhowtoharnesshisessence.”
“Isbeth,”Isaid,angerpumping
hotlythroughmyveins.“BoththeDukeandVessaknewabouttheprophecy,and
VessasaidsheservedtheTrueCrown—theAscended.Isbethmusthavesharedthe
knowledgewithher—knowledgeshecould’veonlygainedfromoneperson.”
“Malec,”Kieransurmisedwitha
growl.
Reaverclosedhiseyes.“Forhim
tosharesuchsecrets…itisabetrayalofthehighestorder.Forhehasgiventhis
BloodQueenthepowertokillmybrethren.”Theanglesofhisfeaturessharpened.
“JustlikeshemostlikelykilledJade.”
Istiffened.“Shemaynotbe
gone,Reaver.Mymother—”Iclosedmyeyes,correctingmyself.“Coralenawas
theHandmaidenwhotriedtobringmetoAtlantiawhenIwasachild.Shewasa
Revenant,butIsbethsaidthatshekilledher.ThatmeansIsbethmusthavehad
adrakenthen—hadaccesstothefireofthegods.Thatwasn’tthatlongago.”
“Yeah,Iwanttobelievethat,
butthefireofthegodsisn’tjusttalkingaboutthefirewebreathe.”A
muscletickedalonghisjaw.“Thefireisouressence—ourblood.Notevena
Revenantisimmunetothat.AlltheBloodQueenwouldneedisadropofadraken’s
blood,nomatterhowolditwas,tokillaRevenant.”
Irockedback,myheartsinking.
Reaver’seyesmetmine.“That
kindofmagic,thatkindofpowerthisBloodQueenhaslearned?Youjustsaw
whatitiscapableof.Itcanonlybeusedfordeathanddecay.”Reaver’s
pupilsthinnedandstretchedvertically.“Sheisafarmoredangerousfoethan
Ithinkanyonehasrealized.”
Later,IsatonthebedasIheldCasteel’sring
betweenmyfingers.MyheadspunasIturnedeverythingover.Anditwasalot.
Thedreamthatmightnothavebeenadream.Vessa.Thelossofallthosedraken.
TheknowledgethattheBloodQueenhadlearnedhowtousetheessenceofthis
Primal,Kolis.Reaver’sbeliefthatJadiswasalreadygone.
IlookedoveratKieran.Hesat
acrossfromme,sharpeningablade.“Ilostseventeendrakentonight.”
“Welostthosedraken,”
hecorrectedsoftly
“Iawakenedthem.Isummonedthem.
Andwithinamonth,they’redead.”Aknotburnedthebackofmythroat.“Youwere
right.”
“Iknowwhatyou’regoingtosay,”
hesaid.“Whathappenedtothedrakenwasn’tyourfault.”
“Itisyouwhoarebeingtoo
kindnow.”Theknotofsorrowexpanded.“IfIhadlistenedtoyouandgotten
ridofher,shewouldn’thavebeenheretodothis.”
Kierandidn’tsayanythingfora
longmoment.“Therewasnowayyoucould’veknownthatshewascapableofsuch
athing,”hestarted,handsstillingasheliftedhisgazetomine.“Your
kindnessispartofwhoyouare.Itisoneofthethingsthatwillmakeyoua
greatQueenandgod.Youjustneedtolearnwhennottobekind.”
Nodding,Idrewinashakybreath
asIlookeddownatthering.Thiswasahorriblewaytolearnsuchalesson.
Thedrakenhadpaidaterriblepriceformetolearnit.
Ibrieflyclosedmyeyes.
Severalmomentspassed.“YouheardReaverwhenhesaidmytouchdoesn’tworkon
beingsoftwoworlds?”
Helookeduponcemore.“Idid.”
“ThatcouldmeanIcan’tbringwolven
backtolife.”
Sittingthebladeandstone
aside,heleanedforward.“It’sokay.”
“Howisthatokay?”
“Howcanitnotbe?”Kieran
asked,hisfaceinchesfrommine.“I’velivedmyentirelifewithouttherebeing
this…thissecondchance.Someonewithextra-specialhands.”
“ButIwantthatsecondchance
tobeanoption.IknowIshouldn’t.Whathappenedwiththatyounggirlwasan
accident.Ididn’tknowwhatIwasdoing.IknowI’mnotthePrimalofLifeand
don’thavethatkindofauthority,but…”MyfingerscurledaroundCasteel’sring.
“Ifsomethingweretohappen—”
“Thenithappens.”Kieran’sgaze
searchedmine.“Allofuswhoarehereknowthatourlivescanendatanyminute.
We’vealllivednevercountingonasecondchance,andnoneofusexpectsitto
beanyotherway.”
“Iknow—”
“Andyoushouldn’teither.”
IknewIshouldn’t,buttheidea
oflosinghim?Vonetta?Delano?Myinsideswentcold—colderthanthey’deverbeen.
Andthatplaceinme,theemptyone,itgrew.
Ididn’tknowwhatIwoulddoif
Ilostthem.
ButasKieranfellsilentand
eventuallydozedoffafterplacinghisbladeaside,Ithoughtabouttheone
thingthatwouldpreventsomethingfromhappeningtoKieran.Theonethingthat
wouldtiehislifespantominesoneitherCasteelnorIwouldeverhavetosay
goodbyetohim.
TheJoining.
Chapter10
Standinginthebedchamber,Idrewmyfingeracrossthe
ring.ItnowhungfromasimplegoldchainthatPerryhadgivenme.He’dused
itforsomesortofmedallion,whichhe’dnowsewnintotheinsideofhisarmor.
ThegiftwasbeyondkindandallowedmetokeepCasteel’sringsafeandclose
tome.
Nervousenergyhummedthrough
me.Valynandthegeneralswouldbeheresoon,andthehardestpartofcarrying
outourplanswouldtakeplace—convincingthemtogoalongwithit.Withallof
it.
Antsyandfindingthewoolen
materialofthemoreform-fittedtunicscratchy,Iwasn’tsureifitwasmy
clothingorjustanxiety.ThiswasthefirsttimeI’dwornthetunictrimmed
withfinegoldthreadatitsknee-lengthhemandalongtheslitsoneither
side.ItwasnearlyidenticaltotheoneKieranwore.Hiswasshorter,hitting
atthethigh,butittoohadthegoldenscrollworkattheneckandacrossthe
halvesofthetunic.
IthoughtaboutwhatI’dhadNaill
createforme.Cometofindout,hewasratherskilledwithaneedleand
thread.Nowthatwouldbeuncomfortabletowear.
Butitwouldserveapurpose.
“Poppy,”Kieransaidfromthe
othersideofthechamber.Ilookedovermyshouldertoseethathissisterhad
joinedhim.
“They’vearrived.Roughlytwo
hundredthousand,”VonettaannouncedasIfacedthesiblings.“Theremaining
armiesarestationedatSpessa’sEndincasetheBloodCrownturnstheir
attentionthere,alongwiththeGuardiansandtheyoungerdrakenwhoremained.
IspokewithValynbrieflyandgavehimaheads-upaboutwhathappenedtothedraken.”
“Thankyou,”Imurmured,
slippingtheringbackbehindthecollarofmytunic,whereitrestedbetween
mybreasts.Isteppedforwardtoleaveforthereceivingchamberthathadbeen
preparedfortheirarrival.
“Wait.”Vonettaglancedup,her
gazeflickingoverthethickbraidlyingovermyshoulder.“Whereisthe
crown?”
Browsknitting,Igestured
behindme.“It’sinthechest.”
“Youshouldwearit.”
“Idon’tneedtowearacrown
forthemtorememberI’mtheQueen.”
“Butitservesasagoodreminder,”
Kieranstated.“Therewillbegeneralshereyou’veneverinteractedwithbefore.
Formanyofthem,thiswillbethefirsttimethey’vebeeninyourpresenceoutside
ofthecoronation.”
Inotherwords,theymaybelike
Aylard.Distrustfulandstandoffish.Isighed,moreannoyedthanbotheredby
theideaofsomanyoftheupperechelonofthearmymostlikelybeingcoldand
waryofme.
“IguessIshouldretrievethe
crown,then.”Iturned,crossingtheshortdistancetowherethechestsaton
thetablebesideahairbrushthathadseenmuchbetterdays.Thecontainerwas
simplewithnoadornmentsorengravings,havingpreviouslybeenusedbyPerry
tostorecigars.TherubyanddiamondcrownthathadoncebelongedtoKing
Jalarawasbeingkeptinacratethatsatinthecornerofthebedchamberunder
amuddypairofboots—afittingplaceforit.
Throwingthesmalllatch,the
richscentoftobaccostilllingered,faintbutoddlypleasantasIslowly
openedthelid.Thegoldcrownssatsidebyside,cushionedbyamoundof
cloth.Thetwistedbones,onceableached,dullwhite,nowshone,eveninthe
lowlight.Theywereidentical.OneforaQueen.TheotherforaKing.Ididn’t
thinkthattheyshouldeverbeapartfromeachother.MaybethatwaswhyI
hadn’twornthecrownsincethenightI’dendedKingJalara’slife.Itdidn’t
seemrighttowearitwhileCasteel’sremainedclosedawayinthischestand
notuponhishead.
“Allowme?”Vonettatouchedmy
arm.
Ididn’trealizeIhadn’tmoved
untilthen—thatIwasfrozen,unabletotouchthem.Inodded.
Vonettareachedinside,picking
upthecrowntotheleft.Shebrushedashorterstrandofmyhairback,andmy
chesttwistedasIthoughtofTawny.Howmanytimeshadshehelpedpinbackthe
lengthofmyhairsoitwouldn’tbevisibleundertheveil?Hundreds?
Thousands?Iswallowedhard.
Gods,Icouldn’tletmyself
thinkofthatrightnow.TherewassomuchIcouldn’tletmyselfthinkabout.
IfIdid,Itrulywouldn’tbeokay.Iwouldn’tbestrong.AndIneeded
tobefearlessrightnow.
Vonettaplacedthegildedcrown
onmyhead,theweightlighterthanIexpected.Thethin,goldenteethalongthe
bottomofthecrowncaughtinmyhair,helpingholditinplace.“There,”she
said,smiling.ButItastedthetangybiteofsadnesswhenIlookedather.
“Perfect.”
Iclearedmythroattoeasethe
stinging.“Thankyou.”
Herbrighteyeswarmedassheclasped
myhandsinhersandsqueezed.“Theywillbehereanymoment.”
“Idon’twantanyonetoknowwhat
Isbethsent,”Iremindedthem.
“Weknow,”Kieranassuredme.Of
course,theyknew.
Itookanotherbreath.“I’mready.”
Vonetta’ssmilewaslesssadnow,
abitstrongerassheletgoofmyhands.Iturnedbacktothesmallbox.The
sightofthelonecrowntwistedsomethinginmychestasIcarefullyclosedthe
lid.Soon,Ipromisedmyselfandsmoothedahandoverthewood.Soon
thecrownwouldsituponCasteel’sheadagain.Hewouldbebesidemeoncemore.
Nothingwouldstopme.Notthe
Atlantiangenerals.NottheBloodQueen.Andnotherstolenmagic.
Emilhadarrived,bowinghisheadasIwalkedintothe
muchairierspaceofthereceivingchamber.Istopped,glancingtowhereReaver
waitedinhisdrakenform.
EvenIhadnoideahowhe’d
gottenintothechamber.
Looselyclaspingmyhandstogether,
thenervousedginessrampedupasthesoundsofclinkingarmordrewnear.
Reaverliftedhishead,hiscurvedhornsbrushingtheceilingashisnostrils
flared.
ValynDa’Neerwasthefirstto
enter,cradlinghishelmetunderhisleftarm.Momentarilydistractedby
Reaver’spresence,hequicklyloweredtooneknee,bowinghishead.Hisadid
thesame,eventhoughshe’dbeenwithussincethebeginning,hersingle,
thick,darkbraidslidingoveranarmoredshoulder.Therewereothersbehindthem,
too,butwhenValynliftedhishead,Iwasunabletolookaway,eventhoughI
wantedto.
Eventhoughithurt
Therewasnopreparingmyself.
Hewasfairer-hairedthanhisyoungestson,whosharedthedarkhairandgolden-bronze
skinofhismother,butthecutofhisjaw,thestraightnose,andthehigh
cheekboneswereunmistakablyfamiliar.
AllIsawwhenIlookedupon
ValynwerepartsofCasteel.ButIbreathedthroughthehurtandforcedmygaze
ontheothers.ThreemenandtwowomenenteredwithAylard.IrecognizedLord
Sven,Perry’sfather.Thethickbeardwasnew,givinghiswarmfeaturesa
hardenededge.Astheyloweredthemselvestotheirknees,IsawthatNailland
Delanohadjoinedus.TheusualstrikingsmilewasabsentfromNaill’sfaceashe
keptaclosewatchonthegenerals—asdidthepurewhitewolvennowstalkingthe
chamber’ssides.NeitherDelanonorNaillwerebeingparanoid.TheUnseenstill
posedathreat.
TheslightbrushofKieran’s
shoulderagainstminecalledforthinstructionsthatCasteelhadoncegiven.
“Youmayrise.”
ValynroseasIopenedmy
senses,reachingouttomyfather-in-law.IbrushedagainstwhatIimaginedto
beanironandstonementalshieldasstrongasaRise.Thatancienthumof
powerinmychesttoldmeIcouldbreakthroughitifIwished,shattering
thoseshields.Buttherewasnoreasontodothat.
Therewasnoreasontoeven
considerit.
WiththeadviceKieranhadgiven
meinthepastechoinginmymind,Iusedmysensesformybenefit.Curiosity
andsomethingwarmsurroundedmeasIglancedatafair-skinnedwomanwith
chin-length,icy-blondhair,andwintry-blueeyes.Determinationtastedsalty
inmythroat.
Thegeneralshadawolvenamong
them.
Happytoseethat,Iturnedmy
attentiontotheothers.Lemonyuncertaintymixedwiththesamesteadfastness
asthewolvengeneralreachedme,whichwasexpected.Buttherewere…sharper,
morebitingundertonesofuneasethatcamefromadark-hairedmananda
brown-hairedfemalewithbrightambereyes.Theiruncertaintywasverymuch
likeAylard’s,venturingintodistrust.Anditwasdeep,tanglingwiththe
thrumofpoweratmycore.Ihadafeelingtheirmisgivingsextendedbeyondme
tothewolvenbymysideandthosewhohadenteredbehindthem—towhatwenow
represented.TheCrown.Power.
We’dneedtokeepaneyeon
them.
Fromhiscorner,Reaverwatched
theformerKingapproachme.Valynclaspedmyhandsinhis,squeezinggently.
Hesaidnothing,butthegesturemeantalottomedespitestillbeingfurious
withEloanaandhavingnoideaifValynhadbeenunawareofwhotheBloodQueen
was.
“Weheardaboutthedraken,”
Valynsaid,turningtolookinReaver’sdirection.“Youhaveoursincere
condolences.”
Reavergaveaslightnodofacknowledgment.
“IftheBloodCrownisresponsible,
wewilldoeverythinginourpowertomakethempaytenfold,”heswore,
releasingmyhandsandsteppingback.OnlythendidReaverlowerhishead.
“Ihopethejourneyherewasuneventful,”
Isaid.
“Itwas,YourHighness,”Valyn
answered.
Iwasaheartbeatfromadvising
Valynthathedidn’tneedtocallmethat,butusingtheformaltitlewhilein
frontofothersorwhenbusinessconcerningAtlantiawasbeingdiscussedwasa
signofrespect.“Wouldyoucareforsomethingtodrink?”Ioffered,gesturing
tothetable.“Thereismulledwineandwater.”
Aquicksmileappearedon
Valyn’sface,hintingatthedeepdimpleshissonshared.“ThatIwould.”He
glancedoverhisshoulder.“I’msureSvenwouldalsoenjoyaglass.”
“Always,”theAtlantianLordreplied.
Iwasn’tquitesurehowoldPerry’sfatherwas,asthevisible,richbrownskin
showedlittlesignsofaging.Heappearedtobeinhisthirdtofourthdecade
oflife,butthatcouldalsomeanhewassevenoreighthundredyearsold.I
remindedmyselftospeaktohimlaterabouthisknowledgeregardingoldmagic.
Emilturnedtothetable.“Would
anyoneelselikeaglass?”
Therewerenodsfromallexcept
AylardandthefemaleAtlantian.AsEmilpoured,Kierandippedhisheadtoward
mine.“ThewolvenisLizethDamron.ThegeneralbetweenherandSvenisOdell
Cyr,”headvisedquietly,referringtoanAtlantianwithdarkhairandskin
thatremindedmeofthebeautiful,smokyquartzDuchessTeermanlikedtowear
inherrings.“TheonestandingwithAylardisLordMurin—achangeling.”
ThatwasoneofthemalesIhad
feltdistrustfrom.“ThefemalebesideMurin?”IaskedasEmilhandedValyna
glassofwine.
“That’sGaylaLa’Sere.”
Iturnedtohimasmygazemet
Vonetta’sandsaidinalowvoice,“La’SereandMurindonottrustus.”
“Noted,”Vonettamurmured,her
attentionfixingonthem.
Steppingforward,Iaffixedwhat
Ihopedwasawelcomingsmileonmyfaceandnotfalselikeitfelt.“Iimagine
allofyoumustbetiredfromtraveling,butthereisalotweneedtodiscuss.
Namely,ourplansregardingOakAmbler.”
“Ourplans?”Murinqueried.His
eyeswereafascinatingcolor—seaglass.“Iwasunawarethatplanshadalready
beenmade,YourHighness.Thenagain,wewerealsounawarethatyou’dseized
Massene.”
“WhichiswhyIhopenoneofyou
aretoofatiguedfromtravelsowecandiscusstheseplans,”Ireplied,his
answeringannoyancepricklingagainstmyskin.Imethisstare.“Thisupsets
you,whichIcanunderstand,”Itoldhim,nowtastinghisicysurprise.He’d
eitherforgottenwhatIcoulddoorhadn’texpectedmetousetheability.“But
wecouldnotwaittotakeMassene.Theywereturninginnocentmortals,andthey
killedthreeofthewolven.Notonlythat,theBloodCrownhasyourKing.Wedon’t
havetimetowaste.”
“No,wedon’t.”Valynlowered
hisglassasMurin’sjawhardened.“Whataretheseplans?”
“WeknowthatOakAmblerisa
vitalportcityforSolis.Goodsareshippedthereandthentransportedtomost
ofthenorthwesterncitiessinceit’sfarsafertomovewithsuchlargecargo
bysearatherthanattemptingtocrosstheBloodForest.”Ikeptmyhands
claspedtostopthemfromtremblingasIglancedatHisa.Thecommandergaveme
asmallnodofencouragement.“It’salsothelargestcityinthenorthwest,
nexttoMasadoniaandThreeRivers.”
“Itis,”Valynsaid.“OakAmbler
isalifelinetotheeasternregionsofSolis.”
“Wewanttomakesurethey
cannotusetheportsfortheirarmies.IfwesecureOakAmblerandthecoast
alongtheWastelands,theywillbeforcedtotaketheslowerroutetodefend
anyoftheirothercities,”Ibegan.“Admittedly,Idon’tknowmuchabout
battlestrategy,butIimaginethattheBloodCrownwillattempttomovetheir
forcesfromEastfall,”Isaid,referencingadistrictwithinCarsodoniawhere
thesoldiersandguardstrained.“AndfromtheWillowPlains,wherethebulkof
theirarmiesarestationed.”
“ButthankstotheBloodQueen,
weknowthattheyhaveseveralthousandRoyalKnights,”Kierantackedon.“Vamprys
thatwillnotbeabletotravelduringtheday.Becauseofthat,it’slikelythey
willkeeptheknightsatthecapital,movingforcesconsistingofmortalsand
possiblyRevenantsthroughNielValley.”
ApprovalhummedfromLizethas
Hisasaid,“OtherthanPensdurthandMasadonia,whichhaveports,wewillbe
abletocontrolsupplytothecitiesandpreventtheirfleetsfromentering.It
willbefarharderforthemtolaunchanattackfromseathanitwillbeforus
todefendonland.”
Cyrnodded.“Agreed.”
“Yousaycontrolsupply,”Gayla
said,creasesformingbetweenherbrows.“Wouldwenotbecuttingoffsupplies
tothosecities,aswell?”
Ifocusedonher.“Cuttingoff
suppliessuchasfoodandothernecessitiesdoesnothingtoaidus.Wecannot
starvethemout.TheAscendedaresecurewithintheRisewiththeir
foodsource.Allthatwoulddoisharmtheinnocents,andIdon’tbelieveany
Atlantianwantsthat.”
“Wedon’t,”Svenconfirmedasa
deepeningpinchtoGayla’sfeaturesappeared.
“Butwouldthatnotcreate
instabilityinthecitiesthatwecouldthenexploit?”Aylardsuggested,and
thatearnedsharpagreementfromthechangeling,Murin.“Forcethemortalsto
standupforthemselvesandturnontheAscended?”
“Howmanymortalsdoyouknow
whohavelivedthemajorityoftheirlivesundertheAscended’srule?”Iasked.
Aylardfrowned.“Idon’tbelieve
Iknowmany,butIdon’tseewhatthathastodowithwantingthemortalsto
fightfortheirfreedomasfiercelyaswewillfightforthem.”
“Perhapsyoubelievethemortals
won’tfighttheBloodCrown.”Murin’sgazemovedovermyfeatures,lingeringon
theleftsideofmyface—onthescars.Itusedtobothermewhensomeonesaw
themforthefirsttime,butthatwasbeforeI’dcometounderstandthatthey
representedstrengthandsurvival—twothingsfarmoreimportantthanflawlessskin.
“Iimagineyouwouldknow,asyouspentthemajorityofyourlifeasoneof
them.”
Anacidicburstofirritation
rolledoffVonettaasIcarefullyconsideredmyresponse.Idecidedthat
honestywasthebestapproachinsteadoftellinghimtoshutthehellup.Which
Iwantedtodo.“TherewasatimewhenIdidn’tdoubtwhattheAscendedtold
me.Notenoughtotakenoticeoftheinconsistenciesortotrulyquestionany
ofthem.Ididn’tevenrealizethattheveilIworeandthechamberstheykept
meinwerenothingmorethanacage,”Isaid,awarethatValynwatchedmeclosely,
hisdrinkforgotteninhishand.“ButIdidbegintoquestionthings,evenbefore
ImetyourKing.Itwasalltheselittlethingsthatdidn’taddup.Itwashow
theytreatedtheirpeopleandeachother.Itwashowtheylived.Questioning
theselittlethingsbegantounraveleverythingelse,anditwasnotonly
overwhelmingbutalsoterrifyingtobeginrealizingthateverythingI
believedinwasalie.That’snotanexcusefornotopeningmyeyestothe
truthsooner,orfornotbeingbraveorstrongenoughtodoso.That’sjust
reality.”
DelanoedgedaroundEmil,
nearingVonettaasIscannedthegenerals.“Andthatisthesamerealityfor
themillionswhowerebornandraisedundertheAscended’sruleandwhoweren’t
affordedtheprivilegesIhad.Generationaftergenerationaretaughtnotonly
tofearthereturnoftheAtlantiansbuttobelievethatanylossorstrange
deaththattakesalovedoneinthemiddleofthenightistheirfaultorthat
oftheirneighbors.Thattheybroughtthewrathofanangrygoduponthemselves
orthosearoundthem.”
Gaylaremainedsilent,shifting
uncomfortablyasCyrfinishedoffhiswineinonegulp,clearlytroubled.“To
them,theAscendedareanextensionofthegods.Andquestioningthem,
letalonefightingback,islikestrikingoutagainstgodstheybelievewill
andalreadydoretaliateinthemostvengeful,spitefulways.Notonlythat,
they’veseenwhathappenstothoseevensuspectedofbeingDescentersorfor
simplyquestioningtheRiteoranunfairtax.Therearenolegitimatetrials.
Norealevidenceisrequired.Punishmentisswiftandfinal.Iaskhowwecanexpect
themtofightbackwhilethey’retrappedwiththosewhowillbrutallystrike—and
havestruckout—againstthem.”
“Wecouldn’t.”Cyrrubbedahand
alonghisjawashisgoldeneyesnarrowed.
“Notuntiltheyknowtheyhavesupport,”
Kieranaddedquietly.“Notuntiltheyknowthey’renotaloneinthisfightfor
theirfreedom.Ifwecanconvincethemthatwearenottheenemy—thatwehave
cometohelpthembyremovingtheBloodCrownfrompowerandstoppingthe
Rite—Iimaginetheywillfindthestrengthtofightback.”
“Andhowwouldwedothatwhen
we’reabouttoseizetheircities?”Murinasked.
Ismiledathimeventhoughhis
blue-greeneyeswerehardaschipsofice.“Onewayisbynotstarvingthem.”
Murin’slipspressedtogetherinto
athinline.
“Anotherwayisdoingeverything
possiblenottoharmthemduringthesiege,”Iadded.“Orcausethemtosuffer
loss.”
Arough,shortlaughcamefrom
Aylard.“Imeannodisrespect,YourHighness,butyoudidsayyouknewverylittle
ofbattlestrategy.Onewouldexpectthatwithyoubeingso…young,”he
said,andIarchedabrow.“Peoplewillsufferloss.Weluckedoutwith
Massene,butinnocentpeoplewilllikelydiewhenwetakeOakAmbler.Thatisnot
onlyexpectedbutunavoidable.”
“Isit?”Iqueried.
“Yes,”Aylardconfirmed.
“Perhapsmyyouth
allowsmetobeabitmoreoptimistic.”Itiltedmyheadslightly.“Ormaybeit
justallowsmetothinkdifferently.Eitherway,nooneontheCouncilofElders
wantswar.NeitherdoI.NordoesyourKing.Wewanttoavoidthat,butwaris
inevitable.TheBloodCrowncannotbereasonedwith,evenifsomeAscendedcan
be.Butthatdoesn’tmeantherehastobeagreatlossoflifeandproperty.
Whichiswhatwillhappenifwemakewarlikebeforeandridethrough
thecities,tearingthroughthepeopleastheytrytorunforsafety.”
“Noonewantstodothat,”Gayla
argued.“ButwhatIhaven’theardishowyouplantoavoidthatandbe
successful.Ourpreviousmethodsmayhavebeenbrutal,buttheywereeffective.”
“Werethey,though?”I
countered.
Acoolburstofsurpriserippled
frommanyofthem,butValynliftedhisbrows.“Consideringwherewestand
today,theanswerwouldbeno.Weretreated.Wedidn’twin.”Heglancedatthe
generals.“Andweneedtorememberthat.”
Ifoughtawidersmile,knowing
thatwouldn’thelpwinthegeneralsover.“Toansweryourquestion,we’vegiven
theDukeandDuchessofCastleRedrockachancetoavoidasiegeiftheyagree
toourdemands.”
AmuscleflexedalongMurin’sjaw.
“Whatwereyourdemands?”
“Theywerequitesimple.Only
five,”Istated.“DenouncetheBloodCrownandallthatinvolvestheRite.They
weretoagreetonolongerfeedfromtheunwillingandorderallAscendedand
guards—mortalandvampryalike—whoanswertothem,tostanddown.Finally,they
hadtoagreetoforfeittheirpositionsofauthorityovermortalsandcedethem
toAtlantianrule.”TemporaryAtlantianrule,butIleftthatpart
out.Ididn’tthinkwehadanybusinessrulingovermortals,butthatwas
somethingIneededtodiscusswithCasteel.
“Andhowdidtheyrespondtothe
demands?”Murindemanded.
IglancedatKieran,whopulled
themissivefromthebreastpocketofhistunic.Hehandeditover.Iunfoldedthe
parchment,theone-sentencereplyclearlyvisible.
Weagreetonothing.
“Ofcourse.”Murinsneered.
“Theirresponsewas
disappointingbutnotunexpected.”Iglanceddownattheslipofpaper,calling
forththePrimalessence.Justanemberofenergysparkedfromthetipsofmy
fingersandsweptovertheparchment.Withinaheartbeat,ashfelltotheground.
KnowingIwasshowingoff,Iliftedmygazetothegenerals.Manystaredatthe
dustingofash,theireyeswide.“Wasit,Kieran?”
“No,”heconfirmed.“Thatiswhy
afewstayedbehindafterEmildeliveredthemissive.Theywatched,speaking
withmortalbusinessownersandthosewhodisplayedtendenciesofaDescenter.
Theyspoketoasmanymortalsaspossible,warningthemthatiftheRavarels
didn’tacceptourdemands,wewouldtakethecitycometomorrow.”
Anotherwaveofdisbelief
screamedfromthegeneralsasAylardmuttered,“Ididn’tagreetoanyofthis,
bytheway.”
Ireallydislikedthatman.
Valyn’sfeatureshadlocked
down.“I’mnotsureifthatwasawisemove.”HelookedatHisa.“Youagreedwith
that?”
“Idid.”Hisanodded.“Itgives
thepeopleachancetoleavethecitybeforetheygetcaughtbetweenour
forces.”
“But”—Gaylastressedtheword—“they
nowknowwe’recoming.”
“They’veknownthatforquite
sometime,”Ireplied.
Svenscratchedathisbeardas
hedriftedawayfromthegenerals,nearingtheothertablethathadaroughmap
ofthecitydrawnup.“TheRoyalswould’vealreadystartedpreparingforan
invasionthemomentourQueenrelievedthemofaKing.”
“Exceptnowtheyknowexactlywhen
wewilltaketheircity,”Murinreasoned.
“Itisarisk,”Iagreed.“One
thatwedecidedwasworthit.”
“Thatmap?”Lizethfollowed
Sven,glancingatHisaasshegesturedatthedrawing.“Thisisyourwork?”
Abriefgrinappeared.“Itis.”
“Knewit,”thewolvengeneral
murmured
“So,let’ssayyourplanworks.
Thepeoplefleethecity,leavingitsomewhatopentous.”Valynjoinedthe
othersatthemap.“WherewouldtheAscendedbefound?”
“AnytimetheAscendedwereunder
threatinMasadoniaorinthecapital,theyretreatedtotheRoyalSeat,where
theywouldbeprotectedbytheinteriorRise.”Iwalkedovertothem,Delanoat
mysideandflankedbyKieranandVonetta.“Iimaginemany,ifnotall,willbe
inCastleRedrockwhenwetakethecityduringtheday.”
“Whentheywillbeattheir
weakest.”Murinnodded,havingfinallymadehiswayover.
“AnyAscendedwhoattacksshould
bekilled,”Hisacontinuedontoanotherpartoftheplanthatwouldalso
likelynotsitwell.“Anywhostanddownanddonotfightshouldbecaptured
andleftunharmed.”
“Theywillneedtobespokento,
anditwillneedtobedeterminediftheycanbetrustedtoabidebythedemands,”
Isaid.“NotallAscendedarebloodthirstymonsters.Iknowthis.Mybrother
wasn’t.”
Murinlookedup,hisbrows
lifting.“AndwhatofourKing?Wouldheagreewiththat?Withanyofthis?”
Myfingerscurledinward,
diggingintomypalms.“Ifyouhavetoaskthatquestion,thenyoudonotknow
yourKingatall.”Iheldhisstareuntilhelookedaway.AndIheldmyselfstilluntilIwasconfidentthatIwouldn’tdosomethingrashandveryunbecoming
ofaQueen.
Likestabhimintheface.
Murin’sjawworked.“Arethere
anymoreunexpectedguidelines?”
“Thereare.”Ismiledathim,enjoying
thelittleprickofacidicangerthatcamefromtheLord.“Ifpossible,no
homesorbuildingsshouldbedamaged.Thepeoplewhofleewillneedplacesto
returnto.AndtheouterRise?Itmustremainintact.Itprotectsthepeople
fromtheCraven.”Guiltslitheredlikesnakesinmyveins.Wasn’tIahypocrite
tostandhereandspeakoftheimportanceoftheRisewhenIhadnearlytaken
downanentiresectionoftheverystructureinafitofrage?Iexhaledslowly.
“Theywillneedthatprotectiononcewearefinished.We’lltakedownthegate.
Thatwillbeenough.”
“Itwillbebetterforusnotto
funnelthroughoneopening,”Murinargued.“Hell,itwouldbebetterifwejust
sentwhatdrakenremainandhavethemhandlethis.”
Reaver’seyesnarrowed,obviously
notimpressedbythestatement.NeitherwasI.
“Winningthemortals’trust
won’tbeeasierifwetakedowntheirRise,”Isaid,surprisedthatIevenhad
tovoicethat.“Yes,itwouldbeeasierforus,butifwedidthat,thena
largerportionofourarmywouldneedtoremaintoprotectOakAmblerfromthe
CravenoranyonewhoseekstoexploitthefailureoftheRiseinsteadof
blockinganywesternadvancement.”
Thereweremurmursof
understanding,buthot,acidicangerbrimmedbeneathAylard’ssurfaceand
filledmythroat.“Idon’tthinkmortals—theirtrustorgeneralwelfare—should
beourconcernrightnow,”Aylardargued.“WeneedOakAmbler.Weneed—”
“Weneedpeacewhenthis
isfinished.”IletabitofthehummingenergycometothesurfaceasIfixed
mystareonAylard.Themomentthetingeofsilverfilledthecornersofmy
vision,hetookastepback.“Wemayneedmanythings,butwearenot
conquerors.Wearenottakers.Wewillusewhatpowerandinfluencewe
havetodestroytheBloodCrownandfreeyourKing.Weneedtolivesideby
sideinpeacewiththepeopleofSoliswhenthisisfinished.Thatwillnever
happenifweprovewhattheAscendedhaveclaimedaboutustobetrueby
leavingthemdefenselessandburningdowntheirhomesintheprocess.”
Hispalecheeksflushed.“With
allduerespect,YourHighness,Ifearthatyouremembertoomuchofwhatit’s
liketobemortal.You’refarmoreconcernedaboutthemthanyouarewith
securingthefutureandsafetyofyourpeople.”
Delano’slipspeeledbackinalow
growlastheeatherinmychesthummed,andIwelcomedtheessence,lettingthe
powercometothesurfaceasIsteppedforward.Gaspsechoedaroundmeassilvery
lightedgedthecornersofmyvision,followedbyicydartsofshock.Inthe
backofmymind,Irealizedthiswasthefirsttimemostofthegeneralshad
everseenthis.
WitnessedwhoIreallywas.
Theyknew,butseeingwas…well,
Iimagineditwassomethingelseentirely.“Showingconcernandempathyforthe
mortalsdoesn’tmeanIhavenoconcernformypeople.Thinkingoftheirfutures
meansI’mthinkingofourfuture,fortheywillbeintertwined,
whetherwantedornot.Itistheonlysuccessfulpathforwardaswe
willnotretreatbeyondtheSkotosMountains.Thiswarwillbethelastone.”
Energychargedthespaceinside
thechamber.Aylardhadstiffened,hisgoldeneyeswidewhileLizethslowly
loweredtooneknee.Sheplacedonehandoverherheart,andtheotherflat
againstthefloor.
“MeyaahLiessa,”she
whispered,aslowsmilespreadingacrossherface.
Theyallfollowed,loweringbefore
me—thegenerals,Hisa,myfather-in-law,Naill,Emil,andtheContousiblings.
Primalessencespilledintothespacearoundme.Reaver’sstrong,leathery
wingsunfurled,sweepingoverthegenerals’heads.
IstareddownatAylard.Atall
ofthem.“IwasbornwiththefleshandfireofthePrimalgodinmyblood.
Makenomistake,witheachpassingday,IfeellesslikeamortalthanIdid
thedaybefore.”
Thetruthofmywordsentrenched
deepinmybones.Intothoseempty,hollowplacesinsideme.Andeachtimethose
holesspread,Ifelt…colderandmoredetached,lessmortal.AndIhadnoidea
ifthatwouldchangeorgrow.IfthatwasbecauseofCasteel’sabsenceand
everythingthereorsomethingelse.Butatthemoment,Itrulydidn’tcare.
“Iamnotmortal.NeitheramI
Atlantian.Iamagod,”Iremindedthem.“AndIwillnotchoosebetweenthe
mortalsandtheAtlantianswhenIcanchooseboth.”Ipulledtheeatherback
in,anditwasn’teasy.Itseemedasifithadamindofitsownandwantedto
lashout.ToshowallofthemexactlyhowmuchIwasn’tmortal.
Butapartofthatwasalie.
TheessenceofthePrimalwasn’t
uncontrollable.Itwasanextensionofme.WhatitwantedwasadesireIhad.
ItwaswhatIwanted.
Leftuneasybythat,Ibanked
thepowerandclosedoffmysenses.Thesilveryglowreceded,andtheair
settled.Reavertuckedhiswingsback,closetohissides.“Iimaginethatiswhat
agodwoulddo,wouldtheynot?Theywouldchooseall.”
Lizethnoddedslowly.“Iwould
thinkso.”
“Good.”Ismoothedmyhandover
mytunic,feelingthetoyhorseinitspouchatmyhipasIconcentratedonthe
brandoftheringbetweenmybreasts.“Iwantyoursupportbecausewhatwedo
atOakAmblerwillsetthetoneforwhatistocome.Howwetreatthemortals
andtheAscendedwhoagreetoourdemandswillbespokenofinothercities.
Andheard.Thatwillaidus,longafterthewarisfinished.Itwill
showthatourintentionsaregoodincase…”
Ilookedatthosegathered,
realizingIneededtodoasCashadtaughtme.“Youmayrise.”
“Incaseofwhat?”Valynasked
quietly,thefirsttogettohisfeet.
Imethisstareaspressure
landedonmyshoulders.“Incaseourintentionshavetochange.”
Gayla’sfocussharpenedonme,
andthereseemedtobesomesortofunderstandingthere.AsifsheknewthatI
recognizedthatthiswasthebest-casescenario.
ThatIknewallofthiscouldgo
southandtherecouldbeuntoldlossesoflifeonbothsides.ButI,withtheir
help,woulddoeverythingtopreventthatfromhappening.
Thetensionslowlyeasedfrom
theroomaswediscussedhowweplannedtotakeOakAmblerandthenhowwe
believedtheBloodQueenhaddiscoveredawaytoharnessPrimalenergy.But
whenValynturnedtome,Iknewitwouldonlybeashortreprieve.“Whatwill
happenafterwetakeOakAmbler?”
“Wemightaswellallgetback
onourknees,”Emilsaidwithasigh.“Becauseyou’renotgoingtolikethis
either,andthenshe’sgoingtogofullgodonusagain.”
Vonettashothimanarrowed-eye
glare.
“Iwouldliketogoonrecord
now,”Hisaspoke,andIsentheralookidenticaltotheoneEmilhadreceivedfrom
Vonetta.Undaunted,Hisaliftedherchin.“Thisisanewpartoftheplanthat
Idon’tagreewith.”
“Wewillhavetoconfrontthe
BloodCrownonmanydifferentfronts,”Isaid.“AtlantiawillneedtoholdOak
Amblerwhileasizableforcetravelswestward,securingthecitiesbetweenhere
andCarsodonia.”
“Soundsgood.”Valynhadn’ttaken
hiseyesoffme.“Butwhatareyourplans?”
Therehadbeensomeuncertainty
aboutsharingwhatIplanned,especiallysincewecouldn’tbesurewedidn’t
haveatraitorinourmidst.ButaccordingtobothKieranandHisa,forthemto
acceptVonettaasCrownRegent,Ineededtoofficiallyannouncethe
appointment.Aproclamationthatwouldinevitablyleadtoquestions.
Theinformationhadtobe
shared.“OnceOakAmblerissecured,IwillleaveforCarsodoniawithasmall
group.ButI’mnotgoingtherefortheBloodQueenortotakethecapital.I’m
goingforourKing.I’mbringinghimbackwithme.”
Aylardstiffened.“Ididn’tknow
this.”
“Nooneisremotelysurprisedto
hearthat,”Murinsnapped.
“Icannotagreetothis,”Valyn
said.“YouaretheQueen,but—”
“Youwillnotbewithout
leadership.VonettawillbeassumingtheroleofCrownRegent,actingonmy
behalf,”Iannounced,muchtothesurpriseandevendispleasureofafewofthe
generals.“Herwordwillbeobeyedasminewould.”
“Idon’tgiveadamnabout
leadershiprightnow.It’syouthatI’mconcernedabout,”Valynsaid,
andmyheadjerkedtowardhim.“YouaretheQueen,butyouarealsomy
daughter-in-law.”
Surpriserose,momentarily
leavingmespeechless.“Anditisyoursonwho’sbeingheldcaptivein
Carsodonia.”
“Haven’tforgottenthat.”Valyn
movedcloser.“Thinkaboutthateverywakingmomentbecausebothofmy
sonsarethere.”
Myhearttwisted.“Thenyou,more
thananyone,shouldn’twanttostopme.Thelongershehashim,andthemorecities
wetake,themorehe’sindanger.”MorethanIalreadyendangeredhim.
“Icannotriskthat.”
“I,morethananyone,understand
whyyoufeeltheneedtodothis.ThegodsknowIwantmysonshere.Iwant
thembothsafeandhealthy.Butnotasinglememberofmyfamilyhasever
enteredCarsodoniaandreturnedastheywerewhentheyleft—iftheyreturnedat
all.”Valyn’sstaremetmine.“Iwillnothavethathappentoyou.”
Myfamily.
Valynconsideredmepartofhis
family.Mythroatconstrictedasawealthofemotionthreatenedtorise
unchecked.Itampeditdown.Ihadto.
“Shewillnotbealone,”Kieran
spokequietly.“I,noranyofus,willallowanythingtohappentoher.Neither
willshe.”
Valyn’sambereyesflaredashe
lookedatKieran.“Younotonlysupportthisbutplantogowithher?Asthe
advisor?Iwould’veexpecteddifferentfromyou.”
“Mysupportofthishaslittle
todowithbeingAdvisortotheCrown,”Kieranstated.“UnlikelasttimeCas
wastaken,Iwillnotstandby.AndIwillnottrytostopherandfail,only
tohavehergooffbyherself.Nowayeitherofthosethingsarehappening.And
maybethatmakesmeapoorchoiceasadvisor.Idon’tknow.AndIdon’tcare.”
Iblinkedawaytheburninmy
eyesandclearedmythroat.“Iknowwhatkindofriskthisis,butI’mwilling
totakeit.Ican’twaituntilwecrossSolis.”Ipressedahandtomychest,feeling
theringundermytunic.“Hecannotwaitforthat.”
Valynshookhisheadslowlyas
theotherslookedon.“Penellaphe,”hesaidsoftly.“Iknowyoucareformyson
greatly.Thatyouwoulddoanythingforhim.AndIknowthatyouare
powerful—moresothanthewholeofourarmies.Butthisistoomuchofarisk.One
mysonwouldneverwantyoutotake.”
“You’reright.Casteelwould
neverwantmetotakesucharisk,notevenforhim.Notevenwhenhewoulddo
thesameifitweremewhohadbeentaken.Buthealsowouldn’ttrytostop
me.”
Valyn’seyesslammedshutfora
briefmoment.“ThenIwillgowithyou.”
“Absolutelynot,”Isaid,my
heartstopping.Hiseyesflewopen.“Youknowexactlywhatshewilldoifshe
hasyouinhergrip.EloanaknowsexactlywhattheBloodQueenwilldo.”
SilencefellaroundusasValyn
staredbackatme.HeknewthatIspokethetruth.NotonlydidIsbethblame
bothofthemforherson’sdeathandMalec’sentombment,butshewoulddoit
justtolashoutatEloana.Iwouldnothavehisbloodonmyhands.
“AsyourQueen,Iforbidit,”I
stated,andheturnedhishead,amuscletickingunderhistempleattheoutright
demand—thepullingofrank.“Atnoontomorrow,wewilltakeOakAmbler,and
thenIwillleaveforCarsodoniawhiletheAtlantianarmiescontinueonas
planned,”Itoldhim—toldthemall.“Mymindwon’tbechanged.”
Chapter11
Casteel
Onemoretime.
ExhaustiondoggedmeasIbraced
ahandonthewallandslammedmyfootdownashardasIcould.
Bonecrackedandgaveway.
“Thankfuck,”Imuttered,
breathingheavily.
TheCraventhathadfoundits
wayintomycellthistimehadbeennothingbutskinandbones—brittlebones.
Iloweredmyselftothefloor.
Ormylegsgaveout.Oneortheother.Dizzy,Ireachedintothegore,pulling
theshinbonefree.Oneendwasmorejaggedthantheother.Perfect.Icould
sharpenitevenfurtherontheedgesofthechains,wherethehardenedspurs
were.
Theweaponwouldn’tdomuchwhen
itcametotheRevsorevenIsbeth.Afalsegodwasagodforallintentsand
purposes,butitcoulddosomedamage.Bloodydamage.
Ikickedtheremainsaway,
knowingthatwhateverHandmaidenwouldeventuallyshowupandremoveitbefore
itrevivedwouldn’tlooktoocloselyattheCraven.
Leaningbackagainstthewall,I
tookabreather.Onlyafewminutes.Ineededtostayawake,eventhoughI
wantednothingmorethantosleep.TodreamofPoppy.
Butthathadn’tbeenadream.At
least,notanormalone.Ishould’veknownthatitwassomethingdifferent.
Poppyhadlookedfartooreal.Felttooreal—toosoftandwarm.Ithadn’t
occurredtomethatweweredreamwalkinguntilIsawhereyes.
Sawhowtheyweredifferent.
Bythen,we’dbeguntoslipaway
fromeachother,andIhadwastedtheopportunitytotellher…
WhatwouldIhavetoldher?
WhereImightbeheld?Whichwassomewhere…underground.Notreallyhelpful
informationthere,butIcouldhavetoldherwhatIsbethwas.Someonemayknow
ifademishadthesameweaknessesasagodorgoddess.Icould’ve…
Aspasmranthroughme,
tighteningmymusclespainfully.
Ineededtofeed.
Thebarbedacheofhungerchewed
awayatme,andwiththeonlysoundthetrickleofwater,myeyesdriftedshut.
Imust’vedozedoff.Orpassedout.Eitherwaspossible,butthesoundof
footstepspulledmefromthenothingness.Myeyessnappedopen,takingfar
longerthanusualtoadjusttothedimnessofthespaceasIshovedtheCraven
bonebehindme.Thestepsweren’ttheshufflingclickanddragofaCraven,nor
obnoxiouslyloudasthatHandmaiden’shadbeen.Therhythmic,lazystroll
ceasedasIfocusedonthevoidoftheentryway.Atfirst,Isawnothingbut
shadows,butthelongerIstared,Irealizedthattheshadowsweretoothick.
Toosolid.
Awarenessprickledovermyflesh
asIbeganmakingoutthefigureinthedarkness.Tallbutotherwiseshapeless.
Theshadowdriftedforwardintotheweakglowofthecandlelight—thecloaked
shadow.
Istared,heartstartingto
pound.Thecloakwasblackandlong,morelikeashroud,andthehoodwas
situatedsothefacewasnothingbutdarkness.MuchliketheoneI’dwornin
SoliswhenIhadn’twantedtobeseen.Theonethathadgivenmethemonikerof
theDarkOne.
Thiswasn’taHandmaidenthat
stoodbeforeme.AndthecloakedfigurewastootalltobeCallum.
Itdidn’tmove.
NeitherdidIasacidchurnedin
mygut.
Thecloakedfigureliftedhands
tothehood,loweringit.
Everypartofmybeingtensed.
I’dseenthelifegooutof
men’seyes.I’dstoodingoreofmymaking,handsandfaceslickwithbloodas
Istareduponsomethingthathadbecomeunrecognizable.I’dseenallmannerof
shitthatwouldhauntmost,butI’dneverwantedtolookaway.Notuntilthe
nightPoppyhadlearnedwhoItrulywas.Thehorrorandbetrayaldawningin
thosebeautifulgreeneyesandthewayIsawherfragiletrustshattermademe
sick.
AndIfeltthatnow.Sick.
Wantingtolookaway.ButjustlikethatnightwithPoppy,Imademyselfsee
whatwasbeforeme.Somethingelsethathadbecomeunrecognizable.
Mybrother.
WhatIfeltwasnothinglike
thatnightwithPoppywhenIhadbeenchokingonshame.Ifeltabriefburstof
relieftoseethathewasalive,butthatwasquicklysnuffedout.Now,there
wasonlyanger,anditcrowdedoutanychancefordenialtotakeroot.
“Motherfucker,”Igrowled.
Maliksmiled.Itwasn’tasmile
Iknew.Wasn’treal.“Yeah…”Hisarmsfelltohissides.
Severallongmomentspassed.We
juststaredateachother.Ididn’tknowwhatthehellhesaw.Didn’tcare.
“Youlookwellforsomeonewho’s
beenheldcaptiveforacentury,”Ibitout.
Malikdidlookwell.Thelight
brown,shoulder-lengthhairwaslongerthanIrememberedhimwearingitbut
clean.Itevenfuckingshoneinthecandlelight.Therewasnogauntpalenessto
hisgolden-bronzeskin.Nodullnesstohisambereyes.Thecutofhiscloakwas
fine,thematerialsableincolorandclearlytailoredtothewidthofhisshoulders.
Closernow,Isawthathewasthinner,butwhileMalikwasahandfulofinches
tallerthanme,I’dalwaysbeenbroader.
“Can’tsaythesameaboutyou,”
hereplied.
“Supposenot.”
Hefellsilentagain.Juststood
there,hisexpressionunreadable.Poppy’sabilitytoreademotionswould’ve
comeinhandy.Unlesshe’dputshieldsup.Hadheknowntodosowhenwemetin
OakAmbler?Therehadbeennotimetolearnifshehadpickedupanything
fromhim.Toknowifhewasasemptyontheinsideasheappeared.
“Isthatallyouhavetosayto
me?”Malikaskedfinally.
Adry,wrackinglaughshookmy
shoulders.“There’salotIwanttosay.”
“Thensayit.”Malikcame
forward,brushingasidehiscloakasheknelt.Theshaftsofhisleatherboots
wereremarkablyclean.They’dneverbeenspotlessbefore,alwayssplatteredwith
mudorcoveredwithpiecesofstrawheinevitablytrackedfromthestables
throughthepalace.Hestaredatmywrappedhand.“I’mnotgoingtostopyou.”
Mylipcurled.“Ihaven’tearned
yourvisit.So,whatdidyoudotoearnit,brother?”
“Ididnothing,Cas.”
“Bullshit.”
Hisgazeflickedupfrommy
hand.Thatmockeryofasmilereturned,hintingattheonedimpleinhisleft
cheek.“I’mnotsupposedtobehere.”
Therewasamoment,aquickone,
wherehopetookform.JustlikethatHandmaidenhadsaid,Malikwasneverwhere
hewassupposedtobe.Growingup,wehadtohunthimdownwhenitcametoour
lessons,somethingthathadbecomesortofagameforKieranandme.We’dmade
wagersonwhowouldfindMalikfirst.Comesuppertime,hewasalwayslate,usually
becausehe’dbeenfuckingwiththefoodordrink—orsimplyfucking.On
morethanoneoccasion,I’dheardourmothertellingKirhathatshehada
feelingshewouldbecomeagrandmotherwhilestillQueen.She’dbeenwrong,
muchtothesurpriseofall.Evenme.
Buthopefizzledout.Hisinability
tobewhereheshouldn’tbewasn’tasignthatmybrother,theoneIknewand
loved,wasstillinthisshellofaman.Itwasevidenceofsomethingelse
entirely.
“Youandthebitchthatclose
now?”Thebandatmythroattightened.Iforcedmybodytorelaxagainstthe
wall.“Thatyoudon’tworryaboutbeingpunished?”
Thedivotinhischeek
disappeared.“WhatIdoanddon’tworryaboutdoesn’tchangethatwe’restill
brothers.”
“Itchangeseverything.”
Malikwentquietagain,hisgaze
lowering.Anotherlongmomentstretchedbetweenus,andgods,helookedlikemy
brother.Soundedlikehim.I’dspentdecadesfearingI’dneverseehimagain.
Andherehewas—yetwasn’t.
“Whatdidshedotoyou?”I
asked.
Theskinaroundhismouthpulled
taut.“Letmeseeyourhand.”
“Fuckoff.”
“You’restartingtohurtmy
feelings.”
“Whatpartoffuckoff
givesyoutheimpressionthatI’mworriedaboutyourfeelings?”
Malikchuckled,andthesound
wasfamiliar.“Man,youhavechanged.”Hegrabbedmyleftwrist,andIstarted
topullaway,aspointlessanendeavorasthatwasinmycurrentstate.His
eyesnarrowed.“Don’tbeabrat.”
“Haven’tbeenoneofthemina
longtime.”
“Doubtful,”hemurmured,
beginningtounwrapmyhand.Hisfingerswerewarmandcallused.Iwonderedif
hestillhandledasword,andifIsbethwouldallowthat.Heuncoveredthe
wound,lettingthebandagesliptothestone.“Fuck.”
“Attractive,huh?”Mylaughwascold,
evenasIthoughtofallthetimeshe’dinspectedsomeminorscrapewhenwe
wereyoung.WhenIwasabrat.“Isthisthetruthsheopened
youreyesto?”
Hisgazeflewtomine,hiseyes
brighterthanbefore.“Youdon’tknowwhatyou’retalkingabout.”
Ipitchedforward,ignoringthe
bandasitstartedtosqueeze.Myfacewassuddenlyinhis.“Whatdidshedoto
breakyou?”
“WhatmakesyouthinkI’m
broken?”
“Becauseyouaren’twhole.If
youwere,youwouldn’tstandbesidethemonsteryoucametofreemefrom.The
samepieceofshitthat—”
“Iknowexactlywhatshedid.”
Hisstareheldmine.“Letmeaskyouaquestion,Cas.Howdiditfeelwhenyou
realizedthatourmother—andlikelyourfather—liedtousaboutwhoQueenIleana
was?”
Angerpulsedhotlywithinme.
“Howdoyouthink?”
“Furious.Disappointed,”hesaid
afteramoment.“Evenmorepissed.ThatwashowIfelt.”
Yeah,thataboutsummeditup.
“Isthatwhyyou’rewithIsbeth?
Betrayedeveryoneandyourkingdom?”Iasked.“BecauseMommaandPapaliedto
us?”
Hislipstwistedintoathin
smile.“WhyI’mherehasnothingtodowithourparents.Though,iftheyhad
beenhonest,Ihavetowonderifeitherofuswouldbehere.”
KnowingwhotheBloodQueen
trulywascould’vechangedeverything.“Yeah.”
“Butnoneofthatchangesthat
yourwoundisinfected.”
“Idon’tgiveashitaboutthe
wound.”
“Youshould.”Amuscletickedin
hisjaw,inthesameplaceitdidinourfather’s,rightbelowthetemple.
“Thisshould’vehealedbynow.”
“Noshit,”Ispatastheband
dugintomywindpipe.
“Youneedtofeed.”
“DareIberepetitiveandsayno
shit?”
Aslightupwardcurveofhislips
appeared.“Dareyoucontinuechokingyourself?”
“Fuckyou.”Isatback,taking
shallowbreathsasthebandslowlyloosened.
“Youcursemorethanyouused
to,”heremarked,lookingbackdownatmyhand.
“Doesitoffendyournewlyfound
sensibilities?”
Helaughed.“Nothingoffendsmy
sensibilitiesanymore.”
“NowthatIbelieve.”
Malikraisedabrow.“IfIgive
youblood,myvisitwillbediscovered.”
“So,youdoworryaboutbeing
punished?”
Thosecoldeyeslifted.“It’s
notmewho’dbepunished.”
Disgustchurnedinmyemptygut.
“Isthatsupposedtomeanyoucareaboutwhatshedoestome?Evenasyoustand
byherside?”
“Believewhatyouwant.”He
reachedintothefoldsofhiscloak,tuggingonastrap.Hepulledanarrow
leathersatchelforward,thekindHealersoftencarriedwiththem.“Figuredyou’d
needaid.”
Isaidnothing,justwatchedhim
pulloutasmallbottle.WhatthatHandmaidenhadsaidcamebacktome.She’d
claimedtohavemadeapromisewhenIaskedwhyshewashere.Andsaidthatshe
wasbored.Butshe’dknownmyhandwasinfected.
Andbythelooksofit,Malik
hadcomepreparedbecauseofthatknowledge.
Hadheaskedhertocheckonme?
Orhadshegonetohim?
“Withoutblood,yourbodyis
aboutasusefulasamortal’s,”heremarked.“Theinfectionwillspreadandget
intoyourblood.Won’tkillyou,butyou’llendupwhereyoudon’twanttobe
evenfaster.”
Iknewexactlywhere
thatwas.I’dbeenattheedgewithPoppyinNewHaven,butI’dtoppledover
thatcliffwhenIwasheldbefore.
Malikunscrewedthelid,andan
astringentscentfilledthespace.“Thisisgoingtostinglikethefiresof
theAbyss.Hopeyoudon’tscreamandcrylikeyouusedto.”Hetookmywristin
afirmgrasp.“Itwon’tendwellforyouifyoudo.”
“Ididn’tscreamwhenthefucker
cutitoff,sowhatdoyouthink?”
Thatmuscleflexedunderhis
templeoncemore.“Youmightwanttotakeadeepbreaththen.”
Idid,onlybecauseIknewwhat
wascoming.Malikpouredtheliquidoverthepartlyexposedboneandnerve,his
gazelockedonmine.And,fuck,Iwantedtoscreamlikeholyhell.ThebreathI
tookdidnothingtoeasethefieryburn.Igrittedmyteethsohard,itwasa
wondermymolarsdidn’tcrack.Thepainmadeitdifficulttobreatheorunderstand
whatthehellMalikwassaying,buthewastalkingbecausehislipswere
moving,soImademyselfpushpastthetormentandfocus.
“Stingslikeabastard,doesn’t
it?Thepainisworthit.Shit’samiracle.Notevensurehowshecreatedit.
Didn’treallywanttoask.”Awrygrincame,andeveninscorchingagony,Irecognized
thatlopsidedgrinthatrevealedonefang.Thatwasreal.“Butitwill
forcetheinfectionoutandgetyourskinhealing.”Hepaused.“Yeah,it’s
working.”
Jawaching,Iwatchedtheliquid
bubbleacrossmyhandandfoamalongtheknuckle.Thepainlessenedenoughthat
Inolongerwantedtobashmyheadintoawall.Fromthefroth,athick,
whitish-yellowpusoozedout,stinkingaboutasbadasthedamnCravenI’d
kickedintothecorner.
“Youdidn’tevenflinch.”Malik
soundedsurprised.“Iguessyou’vefeltworse.”Anotherheartbeatofsilence.
“Andyou’veprobablyinflictedfarworsepainonothers.”
“Youheard?”Irepliedhoarsely.
“Ihave,butI’mnottalking
aboutwhatyoudidtotheAscended.OrtothatCravenoverthere.Gotalittle
messy,didn’tyou?”Hestareddownatmyhand.Thepushadslowed,nolongera
steady,disgustingstream.“YouknowwhatI’vebeenthinkingaboutlately?”
“Howfuckedupyou’vebecome?”I
suggested.
Hebarkedoutasharplaugh.“I
shouldprobablyclarify.Imeanttosay—youknowwhoI’vebeenthinking
aboutlately?”
“Optionsarelimitless.”
“Shea.”
Hernamewasasurprise.Worse
thanacurse.Aonce-welcomedmemorythathadbecomenothingmorethanawaste.
“Iknowwhatshedid.Theytold
me.Didn’tbelieveitatfirst,butthenIrememberedhowmuchshelovedyou.
MorethanIthinkyouevenknewordeserved.”Hetippedthebottleoverthe
stumpofthefinger.
Ihissedastheliquidhitmy
fleshandfoamedoncemore,butnotasintenselyasbefore.
“ThenIknewtheydidn’tlie.
Shesetmeup,”hecontinuedwithashortlaugh.“Youkillher?”
Unlockingmyjaw,Iforcedout,
“Yeah.”
“Sorrytohearthat.”
Iwantedtobelievethathewas.
Ididn’t.
Hesetthebottleaside.“Knowing
you,youkeptwhatshedidasecret,didn’tyou?BetonlyKieranknows.”
Thestenchfromthewoundwasn’t
sobadnow.Neitherwasthepain.“Doesitmatter?”
“Notreally.”Heletgoofmy
hand.“Justthatwe’veallhadtodosomemessed-upshit,haven’twe?”
“Well,ifanyonehasbeenkeeping
scoreofmessed-upshit,you’vewon,”Itoldhim.
“Lookslikeit’syouwhoactually
won,littlebrother.”Hepulledoutasmallclothfromthesatchel.“Found
love.”Turningmyhandover,herevealedtheimprint.“BecameaKing.”Hedrew
histhumbovertheswirl.“YouhavethelifeIoncethoughtI’dhave.”
Theragereturned,asfieryas
thepainhadbeen.“Poppyneverwould’vebeenyours.”
“Shecould’vebeen,”hemurmured.
Hisgriponmyhandtightened.“Youlooklikeyouwanttopunchme.Hard.”
“Soundsaboutright,”Isnarled.
Hesmirkedashedabbedthe
clothalongtheknuckle.“It’sfunny.”
“Whatis?”
“You’reangrywithme,when
you’vespentthelastcenturylivingyourlife—yourbestlifeasit
appears.”
“Living?”Iseethed.“Ispent
thoseyearstryingtofindawaytofreeyou.Notjustme.Kieran,
Delano,Naill.Countlessothers.Manywhogavetheirfuckinglivestobringyou
home—goodmenandwomenyoudon’tevenknow,gaveeverythingtofreeyou.And
thiswholetime,youwereawillingpet.”Unholyfuryswampedmeashe
droppedtheclothandpulledoutsomefreshgauze,unfazedbymywords.That
pushedoutwhatIsaidnext.“DoyouevenwonderwhathappenedtoPreela?”
Malikwentrigid,hispupils
dilating.
“BecauseIhave.Thebond
weakenedher,andyetshestilltriedtosaveyou.Noonecouldstopher.She
snuckoutonenight,andweneversawheragain.Butweknew.Shedied,didn’t
she?”Isearchedhisfaceforahintofsomething—guiltorsorrow.Anything.
Preelawashisbondedwolven,andtheyhadbeenascloseasKieranandIwere,
whichwaswhyhehadforbiddenherfromaccompanyinghimwhenhelefttolook
forme.“Youwouldknowexactlywhenshepassed.”
Isawit—godsdamn,Isawthe
reaction.IfI’dblinked,Imighthavemissedit.Aflinch.
“Shedied.”Thatmusclebelowhis
templetickedevenfaster.“Butnotbeforeshemadeitallthewayto
Carsodonia.Idon’tknowhowshemanagedit,butPreelamadeitallthewayhere,
justtobecaptured.”Heleanedin.“Thebeastwho’scurrentlymissingahead
thankstoyourwifekilledher.Notquickly.Notbeforehehadhisfun.Not
beforemany,manyothershadtheirfun.”
Shit.
“IknowthisbecauseIgotafront-row
seat.Igottoseewhathedidafterwardswhenhecarvedherup,brokeher
bonesintopiecesthatwereeventuallyhardenedandmeldedtobloodstone.”Only
athinstripofamberwasvisibleashestaredatme.“Hemadesevenwolven
daggersoutofherbones.Ifoundsixofthem,andIknowexactlywherethe
seventhoneis.”Henoddedslowly.“Yeah,Iknowwhohasit.”
Icouldn’tevenfocusonthepossibility
thatPoppy’sdaggerhadbeencraftedfromPreela’sbones.Itwastheanswerto
myquestion.
Whathadbrokenhim.
Thiswasit.Andithadhappened
farbeforeIeverimagined.
Icouldn’tblamehim.
ItwasthenthatIrealizedthat
Malikhadn’tbeencompletelyunaffectedbywhathadgonedownatCastle
Redrock.Malikhadshownsomesortofemotionthere.Twice.WhenIsbeth
hadsummonedthatHandmaidenandhadoneofherknightsstabher,hehadmadea
moveasiftostepforward.He’dbeenclenchinghisjaw,too,likehehadwhen
AlastirandourfatherspokeofwarwithSolis—somethinghe’dbeenadamantly
against.Andhe’dbeenshockedwhenIsbethhadkilledIan.Hehadn’texpected
that.
ThiswasthethirdtimeI’dseen
himaffected.
“Shetoldyoumyhandwasinfected,
didn’tshe?”Iasked.“TheHandmaiden.”
Thosepupilsexpandedoncemore.
“Shesaidsomewildstuffwhile
shewashere.”
Malikdidn’tblinkashelocked
stareswithme.“Likewhat?”
“Likesomenonsensicalshitabout
thingsawakening,andIsbethcreatingsomethingpowerfulenoughtoremakethe
realms.”
He’dgonecompletelystill,all
exceptthattickingmuscle.
Coldfingersofuneasebrushed
thebackofmyneck.“Whatwasshetalkingabout,brother?”
Anotherlongmomentpassed.“Who
knowswhatshewassaying.She’sa…”
Iwatchedhimclosely.“Abit
odd?”
Maliklaughed,anditwasapunch
tothegutbecauseittoowasreal.Theamberinhiseyesbecamemorevisible.
“Yes.”Hedraggedhisteethoverhislowerlip.“Iknowyouhateme.Ideserve
it.Morethanyourealize.Butyouhavenoreasontohateher.”
“Idon’tgiveafuckabouther.”
“Didn’tsayyoudid,butshe
hasn’tdoneanythingtoyou,andshetookonehellofarisksearchingforyou
andseeingwhatkindofmessyou’dbecome.Iknowyoudon’thaveanyreasonto
protecther,butifanyonefindsoutthatshewasdownhereandtalkingtoyou?
Itwillnotendwellforher.”
“WhyshouldIcare?”I
challenged,wantingtoknowwhyhecared.
“Because,justlikeyourbeloved,”
hesaid,hisvoicelowasheheldmygaze,“she’shadverylittlechoicewhen
itcomestoherlife.So,don’ttakeitoutonher.That’sallIask,andI’ve
neveraskedyouforanything.”
Heneverhad.
Ithadalwaysbeenmeasking
thingsofhim.Butthatwasadifferentlife.
Isearchedthoseshieldedeyes.
IfIweren’tsoweak,Icoulduseacompulsion—somethingMalikhadneverbeen
goodat.“Youcareforher.”
“I’mincapableofcaringabout
anyoneanymore,”hereplied.“ButIoweher.”
Theflatnessinthewayhe’d
saidthatleftachillinmychest.Islumpedagainstthewall.“Inevergave
uponyou,Malik,”Isaidwearily.“AndIdidn’tlive.”
“Untilnow.”Hebeganwrapping
myhand.“UntilPenellaphe.”
“Thishasnothingtodowith
her.”
“Everythinghastodowithher,”
hemurmured.
“Bullshit.”Ishookmyhead.
“WhydoyouthinkIevenentertainedtheideaofmeetingwiththeBloodQueen
afterwhatshedidtome—whatshe’ddonetoyou?Itwasn’tjustaboutAtlantia.
Itwasn’tonlyaboutwhattheBloodCrownwasdoingtomortals.Thosewere
secondarythings.Itwasalwaysaboutyou.IcametoOakAmbler,preparedto
negotiateforyou.PoppycametoOakAmbler,preparedtodothesame,andshe
didn’tevenknowyou.”
Astrangelookcrossedhis
features,pinchinghisbrow.“No,shedidn’tknowme.”Hefoldedthegauze,
coveringthewound.“Oratleastthat’swhatsheremembers.”
Myheadtilted.“Whatdoesthat
mean?”
“You’llunderstandsoonenough.”
Maliktuckedthetailofthegauzeunderthewrapping.“Ihaveafeelingyouwill
bereunitedwithyourQueensoonerratherthanlater.”
Chapter12
Poppy
Runningmyfingersoverthecoolhandlecraftedfrom
wolvenbone,afaintsmiletuggedatmylipsasIthoughtofthemanwho’dgifted
methedaggeronmysixteenthbirthday.
NeitherVikternorIhadknownexactly
whenmybirthdaywas.He’dsaidthesamethingasCasteel:Pickaday.
I’dchosenApriltwentieth.
Ihadnoideawherehe’dgotten
suchablade.I’dneverseenanother.Whenhegaveittome,he’dplacedhis
handovermineandsaid,“Thisweaponisasuniqueasyou.Takegoodcare
ofit,andshewillreturnthefavor.”
Mysmilegrew,relievedthatI
couldthinkofVikterwithoutdrowningingrief.Thesorrowwasstillthere.It
alwayswouldbe.Butithadgotteneasier.
“Ihopeyou’reproudofme,”I
whispered.ProudofmychoicetoleadtheAtlantianarmies,totakethesame
risksasthesoldiersandweatherwhatevermarksthiswarleftbehind.
Afterall,hehadtaughtmetheimportanceofthat.
LikewhenI’daccidentally
discoveredwhatthosewhitehandkerchiefstackedtothedoorsofhomesin
Masadoniameant,andhowVikterhadhelpedthosefamiliesinside,thosewho
couldn’tcarrythroughonwhatneededtobedone.Hegavethosecursed—thoseinfected
byaCraven’sbite—aquick,honorabledeathbeforetheybecameamonsterthat
wouldattacktheirfamilyandanyoneelsewhocamenearthem.Apeacefuldeath
insteadofthepublicexecutiontheAscendedlikedtocarryoutforthecursed.
I’daskedhimoncehowhecould
besurroundedbysomuchdeathandremainuntouchedbyit.Forthelongest
time,Ididn’tunderstandhisanswer.
“I’mnotuntouchedbyit.
Deathisdeath.Killingiskilling,Poppy,nomatterhowjustifieditis.Every
deathleavesamarkbehind,butIdonotexpectanyonetotakeariskthatI
wouldnottake.NorwouldIaskanothertobearaburdenIrefusedtoshoulder
orfeelamarkIhaven’tfeltmyself.”
Ieventuallyunderstoodwhathe
meantwhenIsawthetrueextentofhowmany—youngandold—werereally
infected.Therewereacoupleofdozenexecutionsayear,butinreality,
hundredswereinfected.Hundredsofmortalscursedwhiledoingwhatthe
Ascendedwouldnotdoforthemselves,eventhoughtheywerestronger,faster,
andfarmoreresistanttoinjurythanamortal.
IthoughtIunderstood.Butnow?
Isheathedthewolvendaggertomythigh.Now,IrealizedthatVikter’swordshad
meantfarmorethanjustaidingthecursed.Hewasn’taDescenter,butlookingback,
IsuspectedthathehadbeentalkingabouttheAscended.TheBloodCrown,who
askedsomuchofthosetheyweresupposedtoservewhiledoingsoverylittlefor
them.
WhetherIwasaMaidenorQueen,
amortaloragod,Iwouldneverallowmyselftobecomesomeonewhowouldnot
taketheverysamerisksIaskedofothers.NorwouldIrefusetocarrythosemarks
Vikterhadspokenofwhileexpectingotherstobearthatkindofweight.
Tighteningthethinstrapthat
laydiagonallyacrossmychest,Ipickedupashortswordmadeofironand
bloodstone.FarlighterthanthegoldenAtlantianweapons,Islidtheblade
intothescabbardsecuredagainstmybacksothegripwasfacingdownward,near
myhip.
Laidacrossthemap,the
remainingweaponsbeckonedintheearlymorningsunlightstreaminginthrough
thewindow.Iplantedabootedfootonthechairandreachedforasteelblade.
Myfingersskimmedthestrapsholdingmyshinguardsinplace.Islidthe
daggerintotheshaftofmybootandswitchedfeet,placingamatchingonein
theother.ThenIpickedupaslenderspikeofbloodstonewithahiltnowider
thanmyarm.Islidthatintoaforearmsheath.ItwasafavoriteofVonetta’s.
Shenormallycarriedoneoneacharmwhileinhermortalform.Isecuredthe
secondshortsword,strappingittomybacksoitcrossedthefirst,andthe
pommelsatatmylefthip.Pickingupthefinalblade,abrutal,curvedone,I
glanceddownatmyself,wonderingexactlywhereIwouldplaceit.
“Doyouthinkyouhaveenough
weapons?”
IlookeduptoseeValyn
standinginthedoorway.Ihadn’tseenhimsincehe’dleftyesterday.
Throatwarming,Iglanceddown
atmyself.“Idon’tthinkyoucaneverhaveenoughweapons.”
“Normally,Iwouldagreewith
thatstatement,”hesaid,hishandrestingonthehiltofoneofthethree
swordsIcouldseeonhim.Iwassurethegoldandsteelarmorhid
more.“Butyouwillbethedeadliestweapononthatbattlefield.”
MystomachtumbledalittleasI
loweredthesickle-shapedblade.“IhopeIwon’thavetousethatkindofweapon.”
Valyn’sheadcockedinapainfully
familiarwaythattwistedmyheartasheeyedme.“Youreallymeanthat.”
“Ido.”Iwasn’tsurewhy,butValyn’s
observationnaggedatme.WhyhadIpickedupsomanyweapons?Mybrowsknitted
asItriedtounderstandmyapparentlyunconsciouschoices.“Ijust…The
abilitiesIhavecanbeusedtoheal.I’dratherusethemforthat.”Ilooked
upathimasIhookedthesicklebladetomyhip.“UnlessIhavetousethemto
fight.AndifIdo,Iwon’thesitate.”
“Ididn’tthinkyouwould.”He
continuedstaring,thoughnotatthescars.“Youlooklike…”
IknewhowIappeared.
MylipcurledasIeyedthe
sleeveofmygown—thewhitegown.ThenightinNewHaven,whenI
decidedthatIcouldnolongerbetheMaiden,I’dmadepromisestomyself.One
ofthosewasthatIwouldneverbegarbedinwhiteagain.
I’dbrokenthatpromisetodaywith
theaidofNaillandthewolven,Sage.Thelinengownwasoneoftwothathad
beenconstructedfromoneofKieran’stunics,thehemendingatthekneesand
thesidesleftopentoallowmetoreachthewolvendaggerstrappedtomy
thigh.Underit,IworeapairofthicktightsthatI’dborrowedfromSage.The
stitcheshadbeenloosened,asthewolvenwasatleastasizeortwosmaller
thanI,andthenreinforced.Bothwereapure,pristinewhite,aswere
thearmorplatesatmyshoulders,andmybreastplates.Naillhadevenmanaged
totackwhiteclothoverthethinarmor.He’ddoneanamazingjob,providing
exactlywhatI’daskedfor,andthenhe’ddoubledit.Therewasanothergown.
Anotherpairoftights.
Ihateditwitheveryfiberof
mybeing.
ButwhatIworewouldservea
purpose.IwasnottheQueenanymortalwouldrecognize.Thegildedcrownmeant
nothingtothem.
ThewhiteoftheMaidendid.
“HowyouimaginedtheMaidenlooked?”
Ifinishedforhim.“Except,normally,Iworeaveilinsteadofarmorand…”My
cheekswarmedagain.“Andnotnearlyasmanyweapons.”
Hegaveaquickshakeofhis
head,causingastrandofhairtoslipfreefromtheknothe’dtiedtherest
backin.Itfellacrosshischeek.“Iwasgoingtosayyoulooklikeoneofmy
favoritepaintings.”
“Oh.”Ishiftedabitawkwardly.
“Ofthegoddess,Lailah,tobe
exact.Notinphysicalappearance,butthearmorandstraightspine.The
strength.There’sactuallyapaintinginthepalace.Notsureifyouhada
chancetoseeit,butit’softheGoddessofPeaceandVengeance.Shewore
whitearmor.”
“Ihaven’tseenit.”
“Ithinkyouwouldlikeit.”
Icouldn’thelpbutthinkof
Casteelandwhathewouldthinkifhesawmelikethis.Hewouldapproveofthe
weapons.Greatly.Thegown?
He’dprobablytearitoffandset
itafire.
ThoughtsofCasteelmademe
thinkofthedream—andwhatitcouldmean.“There’ssomethingIwantedtoask
you.”
“Askaway.”
“Kieranthoughtyoumayknowif
it’spossibleforheartmatestowalkineachother’sdreams.”
“Irememberreadingsomething
thatmadethatclaim.Theyactuallycalledit…”Valyn’sbrowcreased.“Soul
walking.Notdreamwalking.Saidthatthesoulscouldfindeachother,evenin
dreams.”Hisexpressionsmoothedout.“Didsomethinglikethathappen?”
Ittookeverythinginmenotto
allowthedreamtoforminanysortofdetail.“Ihadadreamthatwasincredibly
vivid.Itdidn’tfeellikeanormaldream,andIthinkCasteelrealizeditwas
different,too,rightbeforeIwokeup.Imean,Icouldbewrong,anditcould’ve
justbeenadream.”
“Ithinkit’sexactlywhatyou
believe.Soulwalkingbetweenheartmates,”hesaid.“Mysonsaidhebelievedyou
werehisheartmate—notthatheneededtotellmethat.Isawitformyself
aftertheattackattheChambersofNyktoswhenheawoketofindthatyou’d
beentaken.Isawitinyoureyesandhearditinyourvoicewhenyouspokeof
yourplanstogotoCarsodonia.Youtwohavefoundsomethingsoveryfewever
experience.”
“Wehave,”Iwhispered,my
throattightening.
Valynsmiled,butthefaintlines
ofhisfaceseemeddeeperasheletoutaroughbreath.“IpassedKieranonthe
waytoseeyou,”Valynstated,muchtomyrelief.“Icouldtellheworried
aboutwhyIwantedtospeakwithyou.Otherthanhisfamily,theonlyother
personI’veeverseenhimthisloyaltoisCasteel.Andthatkindofloyalty
goesbeyondanysortofbond—evenaPrimalnotam.”Heturnedhishead
towardme,hisgoldeneyessheltered.“He’sgoodforyou.Forbothofyou.”
“Iknow.”Iopenedmysensesto
ValynandbrushedupagainstwhatremindedmeofaRise.Theurgetofindthe
cracksIknewhadtobeinhisshieldshitmeagain.Reachingforthepouchat
myhipinsteadofthering,Isqueezedthetoyhorseandpushedpasttheneed.
“Ifyou’reheretotrytoconvincemenottogotoCarsodonia,I…Iappreciate
yourconcern—morethanyouprobablyrealize,”Iadmitted.“ButIhavetodothis.”
“IwishtherewassomethingI
couldsaythatwouldchangeyourmind,butyou’restubborn.Likemyson.Like
bothmysons.”Hetouchedthebackofachair.“DoyoumindifIsit?”
“Ofcourse,not.”Imovedtothe
seatacrossfromhimandsatinthethick,upholsteredchair.
“Thankyou.”Thearmorcreaked
ashelowered,stretchingouthisrightleg.“IknowIcan’tchangeyourmind,
butI’mworried.Alotcanhappen.Alotcangowrong.Ifweloseyouin
additiontothem—”
“They’renotlost.Weknowwhere
theyare.I’mgoingtofindthem,”Itoldhim.“AndmaybeMalikis—”Idrewin
adeepbreath,squeezingthehorseagain.“MaybeMalikislosttous.But
Casteelisn’t.Iwillgethimback,andIwilldoasyouaskedbeforeif
necessary.”
Araggedbreathlefthim,andhe
appearedtotakeafewmomentstocollecthimself.
Slowly,Iextendedmylefthand
andshowedhimmypalm—mymarriageimprint.“He’salive.Sometimes,Ineedto
beremindedofthat,”Iwhispered.“Helives.”
Valynstaredatmyhandforwhat
feltlikeasmalleternity,thenhiseyesbrieflyclosed.I’dkeptmysenses
open,andforamoment,Ipickeduponsomethingfromhim—somethingthat
remindedmeofthesourgreenmangosthatTawnyhadenjoyedwithbreakfast
everysooften.Wasitguilt?Shame?Itwastoobrieftoknowforsure.
“Witheverythingthathasbeen
happening,therehasn’tbeenalotoftime,butthere’ssomethingweneedto
talkabout.AndIhavewalkedthisrealmlongenoughtoknowthere’snotalways
alater,”hesaid,andmychestclenched.Iknewanythingcouldhappen,butI
didn’twanttothinkaboutthathappeningtohim.“Iknowwhatyou
discussedwithmywifeuponyourreturntoEvaemon,”heannounced.
Everymuscleinmybodytensed,but
mygriponthetoyhorseloosened.
Heleanedbackinthechair,rubbing
hisknee.“Iknowthatyouwereangrywithher.”
“Istillam.”Islidmyhandfrom
thepouchbeforeIdidsomethingstupid,likeaccidentallysetitonfire.
“Thatisnotinthepast.”
“Andyouhaveeveryrighttobe.
AsdoesCasteelandMalikifhe…”Heexhaledroughly.“I’mnotheretospeak
forEloana,onlyformyself.I’msureyou’vewonderedifIknewthetruthabout
theBloodQueen.”
Iflattenedmyhandsonmy
thighs.“Ihave.It’soneofthethingsIthinkaboutwhenIcan’tsleepat
night,”Ishared.“Didyouknow?I’mwillingtobetAlastirdid.”
“Hedid,”Valynconfirmed,and
ifAlastirhadn’talreadybeenrippedtopiecesandmostlikelyconsumedbythe
wolven,Iwould’veduguphisbodyjustsoIcouldstabhimagain.Repeatedly.
“HeknewbeforeIdid.”
Surpriseflickeredthroughme,
butIdidn’ttrustmyreaction.“Really?”
“Ihadassumedthatshedied,
eitherbeforethewarorduringit.Ibelievedthatformanyyears,”hesaid,
andIkeptmyselfquietandstill.“EloananeverspokeofherorMalec,andI
letitbebecauseIknewitwasdifficultforher.Thatapartofherloved
him,althoughhewasn’tdeservingofsuchagift.Thatapartofherwould
alwayslovehim,eventhoughshelovesme.”
Nowthatdidsurprise
me.ValynknewwhatEloanahadadmittedtome,andIdidn’tthinkforamoment
thatknowledgelessenedhowmuchValynlovedher.Ameasureofrespectgrewin
mefortheman.BecauseifCasteelfeltthatwayforShea,Iwouldbeconsumed
byirrationaljealousy.
“Itwasn’tuntilshetookCasteel
thefirsttimethatEloanatoldmewhatshehadlearnedabouttheQueenof
Solis,”hecontinued,themuscleunderhistempletickingagain.“Iwas…”Adry
laughlefthim.“Furiousdoesn’tquitecapturewhatIfeltthen.IfIhadknown
thetruth,Ineverwould’veretreated.Iwould’veknownthatwecouldn’tendthe
warthatway.Thattherewastoomuchpersonalhistoryfortheretoeverbean
end,andmaybethat’swhyshekeptitasecretforsolong.Ormaybeitwasbecause
theliehadsomehowbecomeanunbreakabletruththatheldthingstogether.I
don’tknow,butwhatIdoknowisthatIneedtotellthetruthnow.I
didn’tknowfromthebeginning,butIknewthetruthaboutherforlongenough.
Thewholesituationis…hardandcomplicated.”
“That’snotanexcuse.”
“You’reright,”heagreed
quietly.“Itjustis.”
Angersimmeredinmybloodandat
thecoreofmychest,seepingintothosecold,emptypartsofme.“Youknewlong
enoughtohavewarnedMalik.TotellCasteelandme.Ifwehadknownthetruth,
wecould’vebeenbetterprepared.Wecould’vedecidedtherewasnoreasonto
attempttonegotiatewithIsbeth,”Isaid,andtensionbracketedhismouthat
thementionofhername.“Ifwehadknown,wecould’velocatedMalecandgotten
leverage.Atanypoint,eitherofyoucould’vedonethat.Butdoingthatwould
crackthefoundationofAtlantia’slies.So,Idon’tremotelycarehow
complicatedandhardthesituationwas.Neitherofyoutoldthetruthbecauseyou
werebothafraidofhowitwouldaffectyou—howpeoplelookeduponyou.Whether
youwouldstillhavethesupportofthepeopleiftheylearnedthattheQueen
ofSoliswasthemistresstheirQueenhadtriedtokill.ThatIsbeth
wasneveravampry.Shewasn’tthefirstAscended.Atlantiawasbuiltonlies,
justlikeSolis.”
“I…Icannotdisagreewithanyof
that,”hesaid,holdingmygaze.“Andifwecouldgobackanddotheright
thing,wewould.Wewould’vetoldthetruthabouther.”
“HernameisIsbeth.”Myfingers
dugintomylegs.“Notspeakinghernamedoesn’tchangethatitisher.”
Valynloweredhischin,nodding.
“Nordoesthatmakeitanyeasiertospeakhername.Orthinkthatsheisyour
mother.Truly,webelievedthatyouwerepossiblyadeity,adescendantofone
ofthemortalsMalechadanaffairwith.Wedidn’tknowwhathewasuntilyou
toldus.”Hepaused.“ThoughIamgratefultohavelearnedthathe’snotyour
father.Twins.MalecandIres.Thatexplainswhyyousharesomeofhis
features.”
TheshockEloanahadfeltwhenI
toldherthatMalecwasagodhadbeentoovividtohavebeenfabricated.I’d
wantedtoaskifthatknowledgewould’vechangedwhattheywould’vedonewith
thetruthregardingIsbeth,butIdidn’t.Whatwasthepoint?Hisanswerwould
changenothing.
“DidEloanatellyouabout
IsbethandMalec’sson?”Iasked,rememberingwhatEloanahadtoldme.
“Shedid.”Hedraggedahand
overhischin.“AndIbelievedherwhenshesaidthatshewasunawareofthe
childuntilAlastirtoldher.”
Iwasn’tsureifIbelieved
that.BecausetheyhadknownthatAlastirhadlocatedwhattheybelievedtobe
adescendantofMalec’s,andthattheiradvisor—theirfriend—hadleft
thatchild,whohappenedtobeme,tobekilledbytheCraven.Theyhad
madepeacewithsuchahorrificactbecausetheyhadbelievedAlastirwas
actinginthebestinterestsofAtlantia.
Ihadn’tblamedthemforwhat
Alastirhaddone.Istilldidn’t.Iheldthemresponsibleforwhattheyknew
andwhattheychosetodowiththatknowledge—ornotdo.
“Ihavealotofregret,”Valyn
saidroughly.“Sodoesmywife.Idon’taskforforgiveness.Neitherwould
Eloana.”
ThatwasgoodtoknowbecauseI
wasn’tsurehowIfeltabouteitherofthem.Butforgivenesswasneverthe
issueforme.Thatwaseasy.Sometimes,tooeasy.Itwasunderstandingand
acceptingwhytheydidwhattheydid,andIhadn’thadtimetocometoterms
withthat.“Thenwhatisityou’reaskingfor?”
“Nothing.”Hisgazemetmineagain.
“Ijustwantedyoutoknowthetruth.Ididn’twantthattogounspokenbetween
us.”
Ithoughttheremaybeanother
reasonthatwentbeyondclearingtheairwithme.Hewantedmetoknowincase
heneversawhissonsagain.SoIwouldbeabletotellthemwhathe’dshared
withme.
Silencestretchedout,andI
didn’tknowwhattosayordo.ItwasValynwhobrokethequiet.“It’salmost
time,isn’tit?”
“Itis,”Isaid.“Iexpectto
seeyouontheothersideofthis.”
Thesmilereturned,lesseningsome
ofthedeeplines.“Youwill.”
Weleftthemanorthen,Emiland
asmallhordeofCrownGuardswhoseemedtohaveappearedoutofthinairflanking
me.Valynreachedout,claspingmyshoulderbrieflyaswenearedthearmieswaiting
attheedgeoftheproperty,thenhewalkedahead.
Asthesoldiersbecameawareof
myarrival,theyplacedtheirswordhandstotheirheartsandbowed.The
pressureoftheirgazes,theirtrust,weigheddownmysteps.Myentirebody
hummed,butthesalty,nuttyflavoroftheirresolvecalmedmynerves.There
wouldbenobigspeeches—nopompordisplayofauthority.Theyknewwhattodo
today.
IjoinedKieranatthefront,
wherehestoodbesideSettiandanotherhorse.OnlyEmilfollowednow.The
CrownGuardsjoinedthedivisions.
Thewolvenlookedoverhis
shoulder.Acoolsplashofsurprisereachedmeasheturned,watchingmyapproach.
“What?”Iasked.
“Nothing,”hereplied,clearing
histhroat.“Ihatewhatyou’rewearing.”
“Jointheclub.”
“It’saclubIwantnopartof.”
Helookedaway,eyeingtheformerKingashejoinedSvenandCyr.“Iseverything
allright?IsawValynenteryourroom.”
“Itis.”ItookSetti’sreins
fromKieranandthengrippedthesaddle,hoistingmyselfontohim.AsIgot
seated,thesightofthewolvengeneralsnaggedmyattention.Lizethcut
throughtherowsofsoldiers,makingherwaytowardtheCommanderoftheCrown
Guard.HisawouldremainwithValynandthegeneralstoensurethatourplans
werefollowed.
Hisaturnedfromherhorse,
claspingthebackofLizeth’shead.Herfingerstangledintheblondstrands.
Concernradiatedfromher.“Becareful.”
Thefemalewolvenpressedher
foreheadtoHisa’s.“Butbebrave,”shereplied,kissingher.
“Always,”Hisaconfirmed.
“Butbebrave,”I
whispered,lookingaway.Ilikedthat.Becarefulbutbebrave.
Andwewouldallbethattoday.
Chapter13
TheshortjourneyintothePinelandssurroundingOakAmbler,
beyondtheinitialrowsofbowedtrees,wasquiet.Theonlysoundswerethe
snappingofneedlesandtwigsscatteredacrosstheroad.Thedappledsunlight
lentapeacefulness,onecompletelyatoddswithwhatwastocome.
Isatstifflyinthesaddle,
holdingSetti’sreinsjustasCasteelhadtaughtme.Thearmorwasthinand
formfitting,especiallythecuirasscoveringmychestandback,butnotexactly
themostcomfortablethingI’deverworn.Thearmorwasanecessity.Imaybe
abletosurvivemostwounds,butIdidn’tplanonbeingunnecessarilyweakened,
especiallyifIendedupneedingtousetheeather.
Emilrodetomyleftandhad
neverlookedmoreseriousthanhedidnow,continuouslyscanningthethickly
clusteredtrees.Kieranwastomyright.Itwasjustthethreeofusriding
towardOakAmbler.
Orsoitappeared.
Iwantedtogivethoseatthe
Riseachancetomaketherightdecision.Showingupwithanarmywouldimmediately
putthemonthedefensive,makingitunlikelythey’dopenthegatesandallow
anyonewhowishedtoleavetodoso.
Butwewerenotalone.
Thewolvenhadspreadoutthrough
theforest,movingquietlyastheylookedforSolissoldierspossiblyhiddenamong
thepines.
Weightpresseddownonmychest,
stirringthepulsingeatherinmycoreasSetticrossedanarrowcreekthathad
overtakentheroad,kickingupwaterandloosesoil.We’dbeenonthebrinkof
warwhentheBloodQueenkilledIanandtookCasteel.Thewarhadstartedwhen
IkilledKingJalara.Butthis…thiswasthefirstbattle.Myholdon
thereinstightenedasmyheartthumpedheavily.
Thiswasreallyhappening.
Forsomereason,ithadn’t
struckmeuntilnow—thatthisfeltdifferentthanMassene.Thiswasactualwar.
Alltheplanningandwaiting,andnowitfeltsurreal.
Whatifnoonetookthechance
totrustus?Whatiftheyallremainedinthecity,eventheDescenters?Myheart
beganthumpingheavilyasthepotentialforthekindofcarnageIwantedto
preventbecamemoreandmorelikelywitheachpassingminute.
Icouldn’thelpbutthinkthat
ifCasteelwerehere,hewouldsaysomethingtolightenthemood.He’dbringa
smiletomyface,despitewhatawaitedus.Hewouldalsoprobablysaysomething
thatannoyedme…andalsosecretlythrilledme.
Andhewoulddefinitely,definitely
likethearmorandweapons.
“There,”Kieranadvisedquietly.
“Aheadandtoourleft.”
Tooafraidtoallowmymindto
speculateaboutwhathe’dseen,Iscannedthefracturedsunlight.
“Iseethem,”Emilconfirmedat
thesamemomentIsaw.
Mortals
Theywalkedalongthesidesof
thedirtroad,severaldozen—maybeevenahundred.Theyslowedastheyspottedus
andmovedfartherawayfromthetroddenpath,givingusawideberth.Itried
todredgeupsomesemblanceofrelief,butthegroupaheadwasn’tnearlybig
enoughwhentensofthousandslivedinOakAmbler.
ThedeepbreathItookerased
thedisappointmentIfeltsettlingintomybones.Ahundredwasbetterthannone.
Emilguidedhishorsecloserto
Settiaswenearedthegroupofmortals,manyofwhichcarriedlargesacksupon
theirbacksandintheirarms.Outofthecornerofmyeye,Isawthathehadslid
hisglovedhandtothehiltofhissword.InoticedKierantensebesideme.I
knewhetoohadmovedahandclosertoaweapon.
Iopenedmysensestothemand
almostwishedIhadn’t.AllItastedwasanearlyoverwhelmingmixtureofthick
concernandfear-coateddread.Theirdrawnfeaturesmirroredwhattheyfelt—twisting
facesofthosemostlikelyonlyintheirsecondorthirddecadesoflife.
MortalswhohadlivedsomanyyearsundertheAscended’srule.
Theyslowedandthenstopped,
staringinsilenceaswerodepast.Theirgazespresseduponme,andafewinthe
crowdweresoworriedthattheyprojectedtheiremotions,thickeningtheairaround
us.Imanagedtoclosedownmysenses.
Afterspendingsomanyyears
forbiddentobelookeduponandveiled,Istillwasn’tusedtothis.Tobeingseen.
Everymuscleinmybodyfeltasifitwouldstarttwitchingundersomanyopen
stares,andittookallmyeffortnottostartsquirming.
Ididn’tsmileasIlookeddown
atthem.NotbecauseIworriedthatIlookedfoolish—whichwould’veconcerned
meinanyothersituation—butbecauseitdidn’tseemrightwhennonelookedme
directlyintheeye,eitheroutoffearoruncertainty.
Noneexceptasmallchildtoward
theedgeofthegroup.
Theyounggirl’sgazemetmine,
hercheekrestingonwhatIassumedwasherfather’sshoulder.Iwonderedwhat
shesaw.Astranger?AscarredQueen?Afacethatwouldhaunthersleep?Ordid
sheseealiberator?Apossiblefriend?Hope?Iwatchedthemother,whowalked
closetothetwo,placeherhandonthelittlegirl’sback,andthenIwondered
ifthatwaswhythey’dtakenthisriskBecausetheywantedadifferentfuturefor
theirdaughter.
“Poppy,”Emilwarnedquietly,
drawingmyattention.IslowedSetti.
Fartherdown,amanhadstepped
awayfromapale-facedwomanwhoheldaboybarelyreachingthewaistofher
cream,woolencoat.
“Please.Imeannoharm,”theman
spokethickly,wordsspillingfromhistremblinglipsinarush.“M-mynameis
Ramon.WejusthadaRite.Lessthanaweekago,”hesaid.Mystomachclenched
asheglancedatKieranandthenEmil.“Theytookoursecondson.Hisnameis
Abel.”
Mystomachtightenedevenfurther.
RiteswereheldatthesametimethroughoutSolis—whentheyactuallytookplace.
Sometimesyearsandevendecadespassedbetweenthem.Thatwaswhysecondsonsand
daughtersweregiventotheCourtatvaryingages.Thesameasthethird-born,
whoweregiventothePriestsandPriestesses.IhadneverknowntwoRitesto
beheldwithinthesameyear.
“Abel…hewouldbewiththeothers.
IntheTempleofTheon,”themancontinued.“Wecouldn’tgettothembeforewe
left.”
Understandingdawned.Knowingwhat
hefeared,whatmanyothersinthisgrouplikelyfeared,aswell,Ifoundmy
voice.“WewillnotbesiegetheTemples.”
Theman’sreliefwassopotent,
itbrokethroughmyshields,tastingofspringrain.Ashudderrockedtheman
andechoedinmyheart.“If…ifyouseehim—He’sonlyababe,buthehashair
likemine,andbrowneyesjustlikehismomma.”Hisgazedartedbetweenthe
threeofusasheshruggedoffthestrapofasackandtoreitopen.
Iliftedahand,stillingEmil
ashewenttowithdrawhissword.Unaware,Ramondugaroundinthesack.“M-my
nameisRamon,”herepeated.“Hismomma’snameisNelly.Heknowsournames.I
knowthatsoundssilly,butIsweartothegodshedoes.Canyougivehim
this?”Hepulledoutafluffofstuffed,brownfur.Asmall,floppyteddybear.
Leavingthesackontheground,heapproached,nervouslyglancingatKieranand
Emil,whotrackedhiseverymovement.“Canyougivethistohim?Sohecanhave
ituntilwecancomebackforhim?Thenhe’llknowwehaven’tlefthim.”
Hisrequestburnedmyeyesand
stolemybreathasItookthefloppybear.“Ofcourse,”Iwhispered.
“T-thankyou.”Heclaspedhis
handstogetherandbowed,backingup.“Thankyou,YourHighness.”
YourHighness…
Itsoundeddifferentcomingfrom
themortal.Almostlikeabenediction.Ilookeddownatthebear,itsfur
patchybutsoft.Theblackbuttoneyeswerestitchedtightly.Itsmelledof
lavender.
Iwasn’ttheirQueen.
Iwasn’tananswertotheir
prayersbecausethoseprayersshould’vebeenansweredalongtimebeforeme.
“Diana,”someoneyelledfrom
behindRamon,andmyheadjerkedup.“Ourseconddaughter.Diana.Theytookher
duringtheRite,monthsago.She’stenyearsold.Canyoutellherwehaven’t
lefther?Thatwe’llbewaitingforher?”
“MurphyandPeter,”another
shouted.“Oursons.TheytookthembothinthelasttwoRites.”
Anothernamewasyelled.Athird
daughter.Asecondson.Siblings.Nameswereshoutedtotheneedledbranches,
echoingaroundusasEmil’sandKieran’sexpressionshardenedwitheachname
yelled.Thereweresomanynamesthattheybecameachorusofheartbreakandhope,
andwhenthelastonewascriedout,myhearthadwithered.
“Wewillfindthem,”Isaid.And
thenlouder,asapartofmedeepinside,nexttothatcold,hollowplace
shriveled,Irepeated,“Wewillfindthem.”
Igrippedthebearasshoutsof
gratitudereplacedthenames—namesIsuddenlysawcarvedintoadimlylit,cold
stonewall.
“Thereareothers,”awoman
towardthebacksaidaswepassedher.“Thereareothersatthegatestryingto
leave.”
Allthosenamesovershadowed
whatreliefthatbrought.Myshoulderstensed.AknotlodgedinmythroatasI
nudgedSettiforward.Ididn’twanttoconsiderwhatdrovetheBloodCrownto
holdtwoRitessoclosetogether.
Whatthatmeant.
Wetraveledseveralyardsbefore
Emilspoke.“Idon’tknowwhattosayaboutthat.”Hisambereyeswereglassy.
Heclearedhisthroat.“TwoRitesback-to-back?That’snotnormal,right?”
“It’snot,”Iconfirmed,placing
thebearinasatchelstrappedtoSetti.
“Thatcan’tbegood.”Hisjaw
worked.
No,itcouldn’tbe.
“Nothingshould’vebeenpromised
tothem,”Kieranstatedquietly.
“Ipromisedthatwewouldfind
them.”MyvoicewasthickasIreachedforthepouchatmyhipandsqueezed
untilIfeltthetoyhorseinside.“ThatisallIpromised.”
Kieranlookedoveratme,catching
mygaze.“Wewillsaveasmanypeopleaswecan,butwecannotandwillnotsave
everyone.”
Inodded.Butifthey’dhelda
Ritejustaweekago,therewashope.Achancethatthechildrenwerestill
alive.
ThatwaswhatIkepttelling
myself.
Throughthethinningtrees,
smallfarmsandcottagesstoodeerilysilent,doorsandwindowsboardedup.
Therewerenoanimalsinsight.Nosignsoflifeatall.Didtheownersremain
inside?OrhadtheyalreadybeentakeninaCravenattackastheylivedoutside
theRise,riskingtheirliveseverynighttoprovidenecessitiestothose
insidethecity?
Afterafewmoremoments,Isaw
theRise.ConstructedfromlimestoneandironminedfromtheElysiumPeaks,the
massivewallencircledtheentireportcity.TheportionI’ddestroyedbefore
theHandmaidenstoppedmebecamevisible.RelieffilledmewhenIsawthatit
wasn’tacompleteloss.Abouttenfeetofitstood,andscaffoldingalready
linedtheupperdestroyedportion.Still,guiltscaldedmyinsidesoncemore.I
forceditaside.Wallowinginmyremorsewouldhavetocomelater.
Closingmyeyes,Isearchedfor
theunique,springyandfeatherlightimprintthatbelongedtoDelano.Finding
it,Iopenedthepathway.Delano’sresponsewasimmediate,atouchagainstmymind.
MeyaahLiessa?
Wearenearingthegates
now,Itoldhim.
Wearewithyou.
Iopenedmyeyes.“Delanoand
theothersknowwhereweare.”
BothEmilandKieranliftedshields
fromthesidesoftheirhorses.Ahandfulofguardsvisiblypatrolled,butIknew
thereweremore,likelyonthegroundbelowtheRise.Butforthoseonthebattlements,
theglareofthesunwasdirectlyintheirpath.Theyhadyettobecomeawareof
us.
Thatwouldsoonchange.
“Hearthat?”Kieraninclinedhis
headwithafrown.
Atfirst,Ididn’thearanything
excepttheflutterofwingsinthetreesaboveandthecallofbirds,butthen
Iheardthedistantyellingandthenshoutsofpain
Myheartspedup.“Itmustbe
thosestilltryingtoleave.”
“Soundslikeasizablecrowd,
whichexplainswhysofewguardsareontheRise,”Emilnoted,liftinghishelmet
andslidingiton.“Fornow.”
Kieranlookedoveratme.“You
stillwanttogivethemachance?”
No.
Ireallydidn’t.
Thattastehadgatheredinmy
mouthagain.Theonethatcamefromthatshadowy,coldplaceinsideme.The
tasteofdeath.ItcoatedmythroatasIlookedupattheguards.Theyhadto
knowwhatwasbeingdonetocausethosepainedshouts.Iwantedtostrikeout.
Butthatwasn’ttheplan.
“Yes.”InudgedSettiforward,and
theyfollowed,shieldsatthereadyaswebrokethroughthetrees,enteringthe
clearedlandbelowtheRise.
Aguardnearatowerspottedus
quickly.Heswunganarrowinourdirection.“Halt!”heshouted,andseveral
guardswhippedaround,nockingarrowsstoredintheparapet.“Donotcomeany
closer.”
SettiprancedrestlesslyasI
guidedhimtoastop.Adrenalinecoursedthroughme,rammingmyheartagainst
myribs.Myskinhummedastheeatherthrobbedinresponse,sendingaseriesof
shiversacrossthebackofmyheadandoverthenapeofmyneck.Somehow,I
managedtokeepmyvoicesteady,evenasdread,anticipation,andfearcollided.
“IwanttospeakwiththeCommanderoftheRise.”
“Whothehellareyoutomake
suchademand?”anotherguardyelledasIopenedmysenses,lettingthem
stretchtowardtheguards.
“Perhapstheydonotseethe
crestsontheshields,”Kieranmurmured,andEmil’sshieldmuffledhissnort.
“Oryoushould’vewornyourcrown.”Apause.“LikeIsuggested.”
Thecrownwaswhereitbelonged,
besidetheonemeantfortheKing.
Myhandtightenedonthereins.
“TellyourcommanderthattheQueenofAtlantiawishestospeakwithhim.”
Theguards’shockwasanicy
splashagainsttheroofofmymouth.“Bullshit,”oneofthemexclaimed,butI
alsosensedgreatunease.Theyrecognizedthewhiteofmyclothingandwhat
thatsymbolized.Theyhadtoknowwewerecoming.“NoQueenwouldbestupid
enoughtomarchrightuptoourgates.”
Kieranglancedoveratme,his
browsraised.
“Perhapsnonewouldbeso
daring,”Isuggested.
“Nah.Youain’tnoQueen.Justtwo
AtlantianbastardsandoneAtlantianbitch,”thelight-hairedguardsaid.
“Atsomepoint,”Emilsaidunder
hisbreath,“Ihopewekillthatone.”
Thesnapofthebowstringwas
deafening,silencingmyresponse.
Kieranmovedquickly,his
reflexesfarmorehonedthananymortal’s.Heliftedhisshieldwithinthespan
ofaheartbeat.Thearrowsmackedoffitssurface.
“Theyshotatyou!”Iexclaimed.
“Yes,I’mawareofthat.”Kieran
loweredhisshield.
MyheadswungbacktotheRise,
angerbuilding.“Dothatagain,andyouwillnotlikewhathappens.”
“Stupidbitch.”Theguardlaughed,
reachingforanotherarrow.“Whatareyougoingtodo?”
“Stop!”Aguardracedacrossthe
battlement,grabbingthearcher’sarm.Heyankedthearrowfromhishand.“You
jackass,”hesaidastheguardpulledhisarmfree.“Ifthat’sreallyher,it’ll
beyourheadonaspike.”
Ifhefiredanotherarrow,he
wouldn’tlivelongenoughtobeimpaledtoanyspike.
“Iwanttospeaktothe
commander,”Irepeated.
“Youhavemyattention,”avoice
boomedasecondbeforeamanappearedatthetopoftheRise,thewhitemantle
flowingfromhisshouldersasymbolofhisposition.“I’mCommanderForsyth.”
“Well,lookatthat,”Kieran
said.“Hecamewithfriends.”
He’darrivedwithalotofhisfriends.
Dozensofarchersrushedthebattlement,arrowsattheready.
“TheQueenofAtlantia?”Forsyth
droppedabootedfootontheedgeoftheRiseandleanedforward,restingan
armonhisbentknee.“IheardrumorsyouwereinMassene.NotsureIbelieve
itthenornow.”
WhenIworetheveilofthe
Maiden,nooneknewthatIwasscarred.ButafterIwentmissing,newsofmy
appearancetraveledfarasameansofidentification.Fromtheirposition,it
wasunlikelytheywereabletoseemyscars,especiallysincetheyhadfadeda
bitaftermyAscension.
“That’sher,”oneofthenewcomers
said,anarcherfartherdownthebattlement.“Iwasherethenightshedamaged
theRise.Iknowhervoice.Neverwillforgetit.”
“Lookslikeyouleftan
impression,”Kierancommented.
IhadafeelingIwouldleave
anotheraswindwhirledthroughthemeadow,carryingthestenchofthecity.
“ThenyouknowwhatI’mcapableof.”
Forsythabandonedhisrelaxedpose,
standingstraight.“Iknowwhatyouare.You’vegotthesepeopleinhere
believingyou’vecometoeitherfreeorterrorizethem.Causedquiteabitof
dramabyspreadingtheword,tellingthemtheyneededtoleavetheprotection
oftheAscended.Becauseofyou,manyofthemwilldieinthestreetsthey
calledhome.Becauseofyourlies.”
Theessenceflaredoncemore.I
concentratedonthecommander,lettingmysensesreachhim.WhatItastedwas
thesameasI’dfeltwhenIpassedoursoldiersbeforeridingforOakAmbler.
Saltyresolve.
“YouwouldthinkthattheDukehimself
wouldbeouthere,defendinghispeople,”Kierancountered.
“TheAscendedhonorthegodsby
refusingthesunlight,”Forsythshotback.“Butyou,beingofagodlesskingdom,
wouldn’tunderstandthat.”
“Theirony,”Emildrawled
quietly,“ispainful.”
“Youknowwhytheydon’twalkin
thesun,”Isaid,doubtingthattheCommandersoftheRiseswereunawareof
exactlywhattheyprotected.Forsyth’sheadtiltedback,andIpickedupthefaint
traceofsomethingsour.Guilt?Iseizedonthat.“Butit’syouwhoisout
here.Youandyourguards—protectingthepeople.Thosewhowishtoleavethe
city,bythesoundofit.Thereasonshouldn’tmatter,shouldit?Theyshould
beallowedtoleave.”
“BothyouandIknowthat’snot
thecase,Harbinger,”thecommanderreplied,andIsuckedinasharp
breathasEmil’sgazecuttome.“Yeah,likeIsaid,Iknowexactlywhatyou
are.TheHarbinger,BringerofDeathandDestruction.Someofthesepeoplemay
havebeenconvincedotherwise,butIknowbetter.Manyofusdo.”
Deargods.IfthepeopleofOak
Ambler—ofSolis—hadbeentoldabouttheprophecy…Icouldn’tallowmyselfto
thinkoftheramificationsatthemoment.“Youbelieveinprophecies?”
“IbelieveinwhatIknow.You
alreadyattackedusonce,”Forsythsaid.“Youarenosavior.”
Inthebackofmymind,Iknew
therewouldbenoreasoningwithhim.Thattheremaynotbeanyreasoningfor
anywhobelievedIwastheHarbinger.ButIstillhadtotry.“Noharmwill
cometothosewhowishtoleave.AbandontheRise,”Iordered,whilesilently
beggingthattheylistenedtome.“Openthegatesandallowthepeopleto
choosewhattheywant—”
“Orwhat?Ifyoucouldtakedown
thegates,youwould’vealready,”thecommanderbarked.“There’snothingthat
cantakedownthesegates.”Heturnedaway.
FeelingEmil’sandKieran’s
gazesonme,Ilookedatthearchers,sawthatmanyexchangednervousglances,
butnoonemoved.Icouldalreadyfeelthosemarkscuttingintomy
skin.Myhearthurtforwhatwastocome.
“Sobeit,”Isaid,lettingmywill
swellinsideme.
Adistantrumbleanswered,
echoingwiththewind.
Chapter14
CommanderForsythstoppedasaflockofbirdssuddenly
scatteredintothesky,thenturnedslowly.AllalongtheRise,guardsquieted,
lookingupasashadowglidedoverthepines.Shoutsofalarmrangoutasthe
drakenbrokethroughthetreeline,becomingvisible.
Withscalesthecolorofash,
NithewasroughlythesizeofSetti,alittlebiggerthanthesteed.Heextended
wingstheshadeofmidnight,slowinghisdescent.Adeeproarcamefromhim,like
acrackofthunder,sendingtheguardsandthecommanderintoafrenzied
retreat.
“Toolateforthat,”Emil
murmured.
Ididn’tlookaway.
Iwantedto.
ButImademyselfwatchtheend
resultofmywill
Afunneloffireandenergyturned
theworldbrightasNithesweptforward,strikingtheairabovethebattlement.
Foramoment,thecommanderandtheguardsweremerelytwisting,writhing
shadows.Andthen,whentheflamesreceded,theywerenothing.
Nitherose,arcingswiftlyasamuch
largershadowfelluponus.Reaverdippedlow,athirddrakenfollowing,its
greenish-brownbodyalmostaslargeasReaver’s.Aureliaflewdownthelength
ofthewall,releasingastreamoffireabovetheRise,catchingtheguards
beforetheyhadachancetoreachanyofthestairs.Shoutsrose.Screams.
Ididn’tlookaway.
Reaverlandedbeforeus,his
impactcausingourhorsestotakeseveralstepsback.Hestretchedouthisneck,
releasingaburstoffirethatstruckthegates.Heatblewbackatusasawall
ofsilverflamessweptovertheironandlimestone.Reavermoved,stretching
hiswingsashecontinuedpouringfireuponthegates.
Thentheflameswaned.Reaver
swepthiswingsbackasheliftedintotheair,revealingonlyscorchedearth
wherethegateshadoncestood.
Mygazefixedonthesmoke-filled
openingasthedrakenlandedontheRise,theirthicktalonsdiggingintothe
stoneastheystaredintothecitybeyond.Therewasquietnow.Noscreams.No
shouts.
Thenhornssoundedfromthecity’s
Citadel,theblareshockingintheuttersilence.Reaver’sheadwhippedinthe
direction,buthewaited.SodidNitheandAurelia.Becausewewaited.
“Throughthesmoke,”Kieransaid.
“Readyyourselves.”
Heartthumping,Ireachedfor
theswordatmyhipasseveralshapesappearedinthesmoke,butAurelialet
outasofttrill.Ihalted.Whateverthatsoundwas,itwasgentle,notoneof
warning.
“Hold,”Isaid,searchingthesmoke
asitslowlylifted,revealing…“Gods.”Mybreathsnaggedinmychest
asthecrowdbeyondthegates,withinthesmoke,wasrevealed.“Thousands,”I
whispered,mythroatthickeningastearsprickedmyeyes.IknewIshouldn’tbe
soemotional.Nowwasnotthetime,butIcouldn’thelpit.
Kieranreachedover,placinghis
handonmine.Hesqueezed.“Thousands,”heconfirmed.“Thousandswill
besaved.”
Potentreliefroaredthroughme
astheybeganshufflingforward,somecarryingalltheycouldintheirarmsand
ontheirbacksliketheoneswhohadleftearlier.Someonlycradledtheir
children.Othersboretheburdenoftheoldermortalsandtheill.Theinjured
withfreshbloodandbruisedskin.Theirstepswerehesitantunderthedraken’s
watchfuleyesastheyapproachedusslowly.Fearsickenedtheair,itsbitter
tastegatheringinthebackofmythroat.Uncertaintyfollowed,tartandlemony
asmanytrembled,catchingtheirfirstsightofthedraken’sshadowyforms,partially
obscuredbytherisingsmoke.Therewasalso…somethinglighter.Fresher.Awe.
ThenIheardthewhispers.
Maiden.
Chosen.
“It’sokay,”Iassuredthem,my
voicehoarse.“WalktowardMassene.Youwillbesafethere.”
Iwantedtosaymore,todo
more,butIcouldn’ttaketheirfear,eventhoughitwassosimilartopain.
Notallofthem.
“Momma!Look!”ayoungboycried
out,pointingatthedraken.Hiseyeswerefilledwithwondernotfearashe
stretchedandtuggedonhismother’shand,tryingtoseeastheyrushedpast
us.“Lookit!”
Ittookablessedeternityforthe
lastofthemortalstocleartheRiseandbegincrossingthemeadowtoenter
thewoods.Then,Ifeltthatspringybrushagainstmythoughts.Deepinthe
woods,amurmurofuneasesoundedfromthosewho’dfledthecity.Ilookedover
myshoulder.Apiercinghowlpenetratedthestillness,followedbyanotherand
another,rattlingtheneedledbranches.Yipsandcallsrangoutintheairas
thewolvenranthroughthetreesandpastthefrightenedmortals,wheremany
hadfrozenwheretheystood,coweringclosetotheground.
“Ibelievethatisallofthem,Your
Highness.”Emilshiftedhisholdontheshield.
Thesoundofpoundinghooves,
thearmiesnownearingtheRise,matchedthetempoofmyheart.Myattention
rosetowhereCastleRedrockbeckonedinthedistance.Whereitsatnearthe
cliffs,glintinglikeburntbloodinthesunlight.
Thewolvenbrokethroughthetree
line,anarmyofclawsandteeth.SagecutbetweenEmilandme,herfur
gleaminglikepolishedonyx.Ardenfollowed.VonettaandDelanojoinedthem,
leadingthewolvenintothecity.
ThebreathItookbarelyfilled
mylungsasItightenedmygriponSetti’sreins.Besideme,Kieranshifted
forwardashewithdrewoneofhisswords.Helookedatme.Ourgazesmet,and
henodded.Iunhookedmycrossbow.
“It’stime.”Isqueezedmyknees
intoSetti’ssides,andhispowerfulhooveskickedofftheground.
Weracedforward,streaking
throughtheclearedgatesandintoOakAmbler,intoonelesscitythatstood
betweentheBloodQueenandme.
Largeshadowsfelloverusthe
momentweclearedtheRise.IglanceduptoseeReaverglidingaboveus,
flankedbyNitheandAurelia.Theyflewattheheightofthebuildings,theirwings
nearlygrazingthetopsofthestructures.
Andthenthesound
came.
Hornsblaredinthedistance.
ThousandsofhorsesbearingdownonthecitybehindusastheAtlantianarmies
funneledthroughthegate,theirhoovesthunderingoffthecobblestonestreets,
andtheirheavy,shortbreathshuffing.Thewindwhippedupbythedraken’swings
whistledaboveus.Distant,faintshoutsrangout.I’dneverheardanything
likeit.
Myheartpoundedsickeningly
fastasIheldSetti’sreinsandthecrossbow.Theforceofthehorse’sspeed
toreattheshorterstrandsofmyhair,blowingthembackfrommyfaceaswe
racedthroughthenarrow,windingstreetscrowdedbybusinessesandramshackle
homes.Thebuildingsweremostlyablur,butIcaughtafewbriefglimpsesof
peoplescurryingintonarrowalleys—andthosewhostoodinfrontoftheir
businessesholdingwoodenswordsorclubsandpitifulshields,preparedtodie
toprotecttheirlivelihoodsaswerodepastthem,thewolvenleapingover
forgottenwagonsandcarts.WeswarmedthelowerdistrictofOakAmblerwith
onetargetinmind.CastleRedrock.
Thetwistingstreetswidened,becoming
lesscrowded,andthewolvenquicklyspreadout,theirclawsdiggingintosoil
andstonenow.NeartheinnerpartofOakAmbler,thehomeswerelargerand
morespacedout,businessesestablishedinnewerbuildings.Lamppostsdotted
thestreets.Cobblestonesgavewaytolushlawnsandnarrowcreeksthatallsat
inthefoothillsoftheglistening,blackTempleofTheonandthecrimsonstone
ofCastleRedrock.
Andthehorns—thegodsdamnhorns—kept
blaring.
Ahead,astonebridgeglistened
likepolishedivoryinthesunlight,andontheothersideofawidebut
shallowcreek,thesunglintedoff…rowsofshieldsandswords.The
massofguardsandsoldiers.They’dbeenwaiting.Thebulkoftheguardsand
soldiersprotectedtheAscended’shomesandthewealthiestofOakAmbler.
Leavingeveryoneelsetofend
forthemselves.
Mymouthdriedandmystomach
twistedasdreadcollidedwithadrenaline,bouncingandspinningoffone
anotheruntilnothingbutinstinctguidedmyactions.
“Shieldsup!”Hisashoutedfrombehind.
“Shieldsup!”
Avolleyofarrowsshotintothe
air,oddlyremindingmeofthebirdsthattookflightfromthepines.
Everythingsloweddown—myheart,mybody,andtheworldoutsideit.Or,everything
spedupsofastthatitfeltslow.Thedrakenaboveusroseoutof
reachofthearrowsaswerodetowardwheretheSolissoldiersandguardshad
entrenchedthemselvesontheothersideofthebridge,beyondthereachofthe
arrowsthatarcedandplummeteddown,smackingoffstoneandshieldand—
Ishutmysensesdown,locking
themfarawayasthewolvenhitthecreek.Wefollowed,sendingwaterspraying
intotheair.
“Shit!”Kieranleanedbackas
thelineofsoldiersontheothersideofthecreekmovedintoformation,slamming
theblood-redshieldsintotheground,stakingthemsidebysidesotheyformed
awallunderalineofswordsthatwouldpiercethefleshofthehorsesand
wolvenalike.
MygazefoundVonettaandthen
Delanointhemassofwolvenandthroughthesprayofwater,aheadofthe
othersandnearlyhalfwayacrossthecreek.Theydidn’tslow.Theyshowedno
fearastheyforgedon,towardwhatwouldbecertaininjuryandpossiblyeven
deathforsome.
Icouldn’tallowthat.
Iglancedupatthedraken,and
theyrespondedbeforemywillcouldevenfinishasathought.
Nithecutawayfromtheothers,
makingasharpturn.Heswoopeddowninfrontofthewolven.Aflashof
intense,silverylightfollowed,andthenastreamoffiresweptovertheline
ofsoldiers.
Thescreams.Thesight
ofthesoldiersastheydroppedtheirshieldsandweapons,stumblingbackand
flailingasthefieryenergyburnedthroughtheirarmorandclothing,theirskin
andbone,washorrific.Nitheliftedasalargerfunneloffireraineddown,
cuttingthroughthesecondandthirdlineofguards,clearingthepathand
leavingnothingbutacloudofashandembersaswecrossedthecreek.I
couldn’tthinkaboutwhatthefinecoatingofashsettlingonmyhandsandcheeks
andthewolven’sfurwasmadeof.Thatwouldhavetocomelater.
Anothervolleyofarrowswentup,
angledlower.Reavercutawaysharply,kickingupwindwithasnapofhis
barbedtail.ThearrowsslicedthroughtheairasKierandrovehissteedtoward
Settiandleanedover,liftinghisshield.Myworldwentdark,andmyheart
lurchedatthesoundofarrowshittingKieran’sshield.
“Thanks,”Igasped.
Kierangavemethatwildgrinas
hestraightened,onlytostretchdowntograspafallenspearscorchedbythe
draken’sfire.“It’sabouttogetmessy,meyaahLiessa.”
Anditdid.
ThegroundsoftheTempleof
Theon,theimposingfortress-likeCitadel,andthelandsbetweenthemandthe
innerRisesurroundingCastleRedrockbecameabattleground.
Wolvenleaptontosoldiersand
guards,knockingtheirshieldsandswordsasideastheytookthemtothe
ground,cuttingoffhigh-pitchedscreams.TheAtlantiansoldierspouredacross
theland,theirwhite-and-goldmantlesastarkcontrasttotheshadowstoneTemple.
TheirgoldenswordsclashedagainstironastheyswarmedtheTemple’scourtyard.
Inthebackofmymind,Isaw
thatthiswasadifferentkindofslaughter.OakAmbler’sforcesweregrossly
outnumbered.
TheRavarelshadscouts,they
hadtohavesomeideaofthesizeofourarmies.Theyhadtoknowhowfruitless
thiswasforthem.Yetthey’dallowedthisinsteadofsurrendering.
EmilandKieranstruckoutwith
theirswordsaswepressedforward,thedrakenfollowing.Soon,Vonettaand
Delanojoinedus,asdidSageandseveralotherwolven.Wecrossedtheroadand
begantheclimb,crestingthetree-heavyhillthatCastleRedrocksatupon.
SoldiersandguardsrushedthroughthegatesoftheinnerRise.
“Archers,”Emilshouted,lifting
hisshieldasavolleyofarrowscamedownfromthebattlementoftheinner
Rise,slammingintotheroadandshieldsandbodies.Mybreathcaughtatthe
yelpsasthearrowsstrucktrue.
“Takecover!”Ishoutedatthe
wolvenasReaverglidedahead,hisshadowfallingupontheguardsasthey
franticallytriedtoclosethegatesontheinnerRise.NitheandAurelia
followedasseveralofthearchersstationedthereturnedtothesky.
Someofthewolvenboltedfor
thetrees,dodgingarrowswhileothershuddledbythosewho’dfallen.Instinct
fueledmyactions.Itappedintotheeatherwhirlingthroughmychest.The
essencerespondedatonce,floodingmyveinsandburningawaythenear-sickening
joltsofadrenalineasseveralofthearcherstookaimatthewoundedwolven
andthoseguardingthem.
Ididn’tworryabouthowmuch
usingtheessencewouldweakenmeorallowmyselftoconsiderwhothearchers
onthewallwere.Thiswaswar.Ikeptremindingmyselfofthat.Thiswaswar.
Asilverywebbingofeather
formedinmymind,drapingoverthearchersonthewallandmovingintothem.I
didn’tknowexactlywhatitdid—whatIdid—asthatmetallictaste
pooledinmymouth.AllIknewwasthatIwantedittobequickandaspainless
aspossible.AndIthoughtitwas.Theymadenosoundastheycollapsedwhere
theystoodinthearrowloops,fallingbackwardandforward,deadbeforethey
hitthegroundoutsidethecurtainedwall.
Thatkindofpower…
ItstunnedmealittleasI
pulledtheeatherback,buttherewasnotimetodwellonit.Thegatesclosedwhile
asmatteringofguardsandsoldiersoutsiderushedtowardthewolven.
Therewereatleastfourtimes
asmanysoldiersandguardsattheinnerRise,protectingCastleRedrockand
theAscended—whodidn’tcareaboutanyoneleftoutside.They’dtrytorideit
outbehindwallsasthickastheouterRise—stonethatprotectedthemfrom
invasionsandthepeopletheylordedover,allowingthegodsknewwhattogoon
behindthem.
Ithoughtofthepalaceat
Evaemon,wherenowallseparatedtheCrownfromitspeople,andmysenseofwonder
uponseeinghowaccessibletheCrownwas.
Aglimpseoffawncaughtmy
attention.Iliftedthecrossbow,levelingitasCasteelhadinstructedmeon
theroadtoSpessa’sEnd.Itookaim,firingtheboltthickerthananarrow.
Itstrucktrue,snaggingoneof
theguardsbeforehecouldreachVonetta.Sheracedpasthimashefell
backwardandthenleaptintotheair,takingdownanotherguard.IfoundReaver
inthesky.“Takeitdown,”Imurmured,aimingthecrossbowatasoldierstreaking
acrosstheland,headingforDelano.“TaketheinnerRisedown.”
Ifired,strikingtheman.His
legswentoutfromunderhimasthewhitewolvenlatchedontothearmofa
guardwhowasswinginghissworddownonawoundedwolven.Delanoyankedthehowling
manback,twistinghisheadsharply.Redsprayedandstainedthesnowyfur.
“Fallback,”Kieranshoutedto
thewolvenasIreachedouttoasmanyofthemasIcouldthroughthenotam.
“Fallback!”
Thewolvenskirtedthewall,
backingoffasReaverbrokethroughtheglareofthesun,divingsharplyabovethe
innerRise.Afunnelofintensefirespilledforth,slammingintothestone.
Chunksofrockexplodedunderitspower.Anotherstreamoffirecamefrom
above,andthenathirdasthedrakenflewoverthelengthofthewallthe
Ascendedhidbehind,obliteratingthestructuresonothingremainedbetween
CastleRedrockandthepeople—asitshouldbe
Asthesmokeanddebrissettled,
InudgedSettiforward.Thewolvenstreamedoutfromthetrees,andassillyas
itwas,Iheldmybreathuntilwecrossedintothesplatteredstonecourtyard.
Exhalingraggedly,mygazesweptthesoldiersandguardsrushingacrossthe
yard,movingtothemaincastledoors,sealedbyiron—
Kierandrewhishorsetoahalt
andleanedover,grippingSetti’sreins.Myheadjerkedaroundjustasa
greenish-browndrakenlandedinthecourtyarddirectlybeforeus,hertailwhipping
outmereinchesfromourhorses’noses.“Goodgods,”herasped.“Theyhaveno
senseofspatialawareness.”
Theyreallydidn’t.
Aurelia’slargewingssweptback
assheextendedherheadforward,lettingoutaburstofsilveryfireatthe
guards,takingoutahugechunkofthem.Thedrakenhadtobetiring,andIhad
noideahowtheyrecovered.
Probablyshould’veaskedthat
question.
Severaldozenmoreguardsrounded
thecastle,swarmingthecourtyard.“I’mcallingthedrakenback,”Isaid,and
Kierandidn’tquestionwhyasAureliaturnedherheadtowardme.
“Go,”Iurged.Therewasno
threatfromarchers,asnoarrowslitscouldbeseeninthefront-facingtowers
ofRedrock.AndanywhohadbeenintheinnerRise…well,theywerenolongera
concern.“Findasafeplacetorest.”
Shemadearough,deepharrumphing
soundbutlifted.IsawReaverandNithedothesame,buttheydidn’tgofar.
NitheandAureliaretreatedtothemassiveoaksandthejuttingrocksand
bouldersalongthesea-facingcliffsofthecourtyard.ButReaver…
Heflewuptooneofthecrimson
spires,sinkinghistalonsintothestone,sendingafinemistofdustexploding
intotheairashecurledhisbodyaroundthetower.Stretchinghisneck,he
peereddownonthecourtyard,lettingoutadeafeningroarthatcausedmanyof
thesoldierstoscatterindifferentdirections,andotherstostopwherethey
were,coveringtheirheadswiththeirshields.
“Findsomeplacetorest?”Emil
lookedoveratme,hisgoldeyeswide.“Andhechosethat?”
“Thatwasn’texactlywhatI’d
hadinmindwhenIsaidthat,butReaver’s…goingtobeReaver.”
Kieransnortedasmygazelifted
tothesoldierswhohadtakenuptheirstationsinfrontofthewidestepsleading
tothedoorsofCastleRedrock.Therehadtobeahundredatleast,shields
heldsidebysideandspearsattheready.Theydidn’tmoveasthewolvenprowled
forward,overwhatremainedofthewall.
Behindus,ourarmiescrested
thehillandflowedintothecourtyard.IcaughtsightofValyn,hisarmored
chestsplatteredwithblood.Hisarodebesidehim,herchestrisingandfalling
heavily.Reliefswampedmeatthesightofthem.
Kieranguidedhishorseforward,
swordattheready.“Ourfightisnotwithyou.It’swithwhoisbehindthose
doors.Surrender,andnoharmwillcometoyou.Justasnoharmhascometo
thosewholeftthecity.”
Iturnedbacktotheshieldsand
spears,keepingmycrossbowleveled.“Weswearthattoyou.”
Theguardsandsoldiersmadeno
move,butIsawafewlowertheirspears.Please,Ithought.Please,
justlisten.
Fromthespire,Reaverletouta
smokybreathandarumblinggrowlthatmatchedthatofthewolvenontheground,
whosnappedandbaredsharp,blood-streakedteethastheypacedbeforesoldiers
whohadfacesfartooyoungtobelongtothoseholdingtheline.Theydidn’t
needtodietoday.
Alotofthosewhoalreadyhad
hadn’tneededto.
Openingmysensestothem,I
immediatelytastedthesaltinessofdistrust,andthebitterbiteoffearas
theystaredatme—lookinguponsomeonetheylikelybelievedtobeafalsegod.
“IwasoncetheMaiden,the
Chosen,butnogodschoseme,”Itoldthem,hookingthecrossbowontooneof
Setti’sstraps.“TheAscendeddidbecausetheyknewwhatIwas.”
I’dwornwhitetoremindthepeople
ofwhoIwas.
ItwastimeIshowedthemwhat
I’dbecome.
Allowingtheessenceofthe
Primalgodtosurfacewaslikehavingthegoldenchainsremoved,andtheveillifted.
ThemoreIallowedittohappen,themoreitfelt…natural.Ididn’tthinkthis
wouldweakenmebecauseitfeltlikeIwasnolongerhidingwhoIwas.Itwas
almostarelief.
Thehuminmychestpulsedand
poundedthroughmyveins.Thethrumofpowermovedtomyskin,wherea
silvery-whiteauraappeared.
Awaveofsurprisefelllikefreezing
rain,ripplingoverthosebeforeme.“IamnottheHarbinger.Icarrytheblood
oftheKingofGodsinme,andthosewhoresideinthesewallsdonotspeakto
anygod—orforthem.Theyareyourenemy.Notus.”
Noonemoved.
Andthen…
Shieldsandspearsclatteredoff
thestonestepsastheysurrendered
ThewaveofreliefIfeltwasso
potent,itwasalittledizzying.Pullingtheeatherbackin,Irubbedtheside
ofSetti’sneckandthenswungmylegoverthesaddle,dismounting.Emiland
KieranquicklyfollowedasIwalkedforward,mythighsachingfromhowtense
I’dbeentheentiretime.
Underthewatchfuleyesofthe
wolvenandReaver,themenstaredasIapproachedthem.Afewhadlowered
themselvestotheirknees,placingtremblinghandsacrosstheirchestsandon
theground.Othersstoodasifinadaze.
“AllIneedtoknowrightnowis
wheretheRavarelsandtheAscendedarelocatedinthecastle,”Isaid.
“Thechambers.”Ayoungman
wearingtheblackofaRiseGuardquaveredashespoke.“Theywould’vegone
intotheundergroundchambers.”
AsVonetta,alongwithseveralothers,wenttosecurethe
TempleofTheon—andhopefullylocatethechildren—Idescendedintothechambers
underCastleRedrockwithKieran,Emil,andsomeofthewolven,whileValyn
searchedRedrockwithHisaandseveralofthesoldiers.
Ididn’tlookpastthecrimson
bannersbearingtheRoyalCrestandthehallwaythatledtowardtheGreatHall.
Icouldn’t.ThelastthingIneededtoberemindedofwaswhereIanhadtaken
hislastbreath.
AndwhereI’dlastseenCasteel.
So,wewentstraightforthe
halltheHandmaidenhadledusthroughthelasttimewewerehere.TheRise
Guardwho’dspokenupoutsideledtheway,whilemymindlingeredonwhatI’d
seeninoneoftheundergroundchambers.
Thecage.
Myfather
Iknewitwashighlyunlikely
thathewasstillthere.Ididn’tevenunderstandwhyIsbethhadbroughthim
withherinthefirstplace,butIdoubtedshewould’velefthimbehind.
“Keepwalking,”Emiladvised
coollywhenTasos,theguard,slowedaswetraveleddownthenarrowstairwell.
“S-sorry.”Tasospickeduphis
paceasArden,inhiswolvenform,nudgedhim.“It’sjustthatthereshouldbe
guardshere.”Heswallowed.“Atleasttenofthem.”
IglancedatKieran.Thatwas
odd.“Couldtheyhavejoinedthefightoutside?”
“No.Theyweregivenordersto
blockthestairwell,”Tasostoldus.“It’stheonlywayintotheunderground
chambersfromtheinside.”
Isitpossibletheymovedto
thesectionwesnuckthrough?Delano’squestionwhisperedthroughmythoughts
asweroundedabendinthestairwell.
Andthenthestenchhitus.
Thesickly-sweetscentofdeath.
“Whatis…?”Tasostrailedoffas
westeppedintothenarrow,torch-lithall.
“Hell,”KieranmutteredasI
reachedforthewolvendaggeronmythighoutofhabitinsteadofgoingforthe
swords.
Red.Somuchred.Itstreaked
acrossthestonefloor,splatteredthewalls,andpooledunderthebodies.
“Well,”Emildrawledashe
lookeddownatafallenbloodstonesword.Severalofthemwerescatteredabout.
“I’massumingthesearetheguards.”
“Yeah,”Tasoscroakedashe
stoodthere,armsstiffathissides.
“WouldtheAscendedhavedonethis?”
Emilasked,glancingbackatme.
Tasos’headcutsharplyinhis
direction,hissurpriseanicyburstinthebackofmythroat.Itwasclear
thathehadnoideawhattheAscendedwere.
“Idon’tseewhytheywould’vedone
this.”Iwalkedforward,noteventryingtoavoidtheblood.Itwouldbe
impossible.Emil,asalways,followedcloselybehind.
Kierankneltbyoneofthe
fallenguards.“Idon’tthinkthiswastheworkofavampry.”
“Vampry?”Tasoswhispered.
Therewasn’tenoughtimeinthe
realmtoexplainwhattheAscendedwere.Noneofusbothered.
“Lookatthis.”Kieranpickedup
alimparmasDelanojoinedthem.Theblackuniformwastornandripped,
revealingskinthathadn’tfaredmuchbetter.
Istiffened.Eveninthe
flickeringtorchlight,Irecognizedthewounds.Isawthemonmybody.Jagged
bitemarks.Foursetsoffangs.Iturned,scanninganotherbody.Mystomach
roiled,andIswallowedhard.Theman’schesthadbeenclawedinto,revealing
ropeypinkmuscleandtissue.
Tinyhairsroseallovermybody
asIunsheathedthewolvendagger.
Arden’searsflattenedandhe
letoutasnarlthatreverberatedthroughthehallasheprowledforward,one
stepandthentwo.Atthesamemoment,Kieran’sheadsnappedinthedirection
ofwherethehallwaysplit.Delano’slipspeeledbackashegrowledlowinhisthroat.
Theysenseditbeforewesaw
it—wispytendrilscreepingoutfromthecorridoraheadandspillingintothe
hall.
Themist
Andonlyonethingcouldbe
withinit.Thesamethingresponsibleforthesewounds.
TheCraven.
Chapter15
Vikteroncetoldmethathebelievedthemistwasmore
thanjustashieldthatcloakedtheCraven.Itwaswhatfilledtheirlungs
sincenobreathdid.Itwaswhatseepedfromtheirporessincetheydidnot
sweat.
Itnevermadesensetomethen,
butnow,afterseeingthePrimalmistintheSkotosMountainsandagainin
Iliseeum,IhadtowonderifVikterhadbeenontosomething.IfthisPrimal
mistwassomehowrelatedtowhatsurroundedtheCraven
Iwouldhavetothinkaboutthat
later,whenthemistwasn’tfillingtheendofthehall,risinghalfwayupthe
walls.Insideit,darkshapescouldbeseen.Manydarkshapes—
Ardenlungedforward,takingoff
forthemist.
“No!”Ishouted.
Butitwastoolate.Themist
swallowedhim,hissnarlinggrowlslostintheskin-chillingshrieks.
“Shit!”Kierangrabbedafallen
bloodstoneswordashekickedoneovertoEmil.Herose.
IgrabbedholdofTasos’collar,
pushingtheweaponlessguardbackasEmilsnatchedupaspearwithabloodstone
blade.“Stayback,”Iordered,nottrustingtheguardtopickupaweaponanduse
itonaCravenversusoneofus.
ACravenshotforward—incredibly
fast,andincrediblyfresh.Undertheblood-smearedface,themale’s
skincarriedthegraypallorofdeath,andshadowshadalreadyformedunderits
crimsoneyes.Buttheblacktunicandtrousersweren’tragged.Anotherbroke
freeofthemist,lettingoutashrillhowl.Thisonewasawoman,dressedthesame
astheman.Thenanotherandanother.Noneweremissingclumpsofhairorhad
patchesofskinmissingorhanging.
Allhadgaping,terriblewoundsat
thethroats.
“Mother—”Emilchangeduphis
griponthespear.“—fucker.”Hethrewit,strikingthemaleCravenin
thechest.
Thecreaturepinwheeled,falling
backward.AnothertookitsplaceasIracedforward,shovingmyarmunderthe
Craven’schin.Blood-streakedteethsnappedatme.Thewoman…gods,shehadto
bemyage,maybeevenyounger.Shewould’vebeenprettyifnotforthedark
veinsspreadingoutfromthebiteonherthroat,coveringthesideof
hercheek.
Andforthefactthatshewas
basicallydead.
Ishovedthebloodstoneintoher
chestjustashot,burningpainslammedintome.Painthatwasnotmine.
Arden.Yankingthedaggerfree,IjumpedbackasEmiltossedaheadless
Cravenaside
DelanoleaptoverEmilasthe
Atlantianbenttoretrieveabloodstonesword,landingonaCraven’schest.He
toreintoitwithhisclawsasIdesperatelysearchedthemistforanysignofArden.
Icouldn’thearhimoverthegodsforsakenscreeching.
Heartthumping,Ithrustthe
daggerintoaCraven’schestasIletmysensesstretchout,lookingfor
Arden’suniqueimprint.ItwassaltyliketheseaandremindedmeofSaion’s
Cove.Icouldn’tfindit.Icouldn’tsensehim.Panicblossomed.
Kierancursedashecutthrougha
Craven,twistingasanotherbouncedoffthewall,rushinghim.Shooting
forward,Iswungmylegoutandup,plantingmybootedfootintheCraven’smidsection.
Itriednottothinkabouthowitdidn’tcaveundertheforcelikearotted
Craven’swould—abouthowthisoldermalewithbloodysmilelinescreasinghis
facemusthavebeenalivethedaybefore.IkickedtheCravenintothewall.It
screamedwhileIrushedit,cuttingthesoundoffwithadirectblowtothe
head.Ispunaround,stirringthemistatmyhips.
“Thanks,”Kierangrunted.
“WeneedtofindArden.”Ishot
pasthim,suckinginasuddenbreathasaCravengrabbedforme.Iduckedunder
itsarmandthentwisted,jabbingthedaggerthroughthebaseofthecreature’s
neck,severingitsspinalcord.Ispun,searchingthethick,churningmist.
ThreeCravenwereontheir
knees,crowdedtogetheronthefloor,oversomethingoncesilverandwhitebut
now…red.
Myheartstopped.No.No.No.
Horrorpropelledmeforward.
Graspingafistfulofhair,IyankedoneoftheCravenbackasIjammedtheblade
intothebackofherneck.Herslackenedmouthglistenedwithblood.Chokingon
acry,Igrabbedanother,throwingitaside.Kieranwasthere,thrustinghis
swordintotheCraven’shead.Emilshotforward,hisbladecleavingthroughthe
neckofthethirdCravenasIdroppedtomykneesbesideArden
“Oh,gods,”Igasped,dropping
thedagger.Ardenwasbreathingtoorapidly,andthewounds,thebites—
“Guardher,”Kieraninstructed
ashedroppedtotheblood-slickflooracrossfromme.
Delanopressedagainstmybackas
Emilcircledus.IsankmyhandsintoArden’sthickfur,feelinghischestrise
andthenstop.Noinhale.Nothing.Myheartmadeatrippingmotion.Mygaze
flewtohisheadasthemistslowlydissipatedaroundus.Arden’seyeswere
open,paleblueanddull.Hisgazefixed.
“No,”Iwhispered.“No.No.”
“Fuck,”Kieranexplodedasherocked
forward,placinghishandonArden’sneck.“Fuck.”
IknewwhatReaverhadsaid,but
Ihadtotry.IhadtobecauseIcouldn’tbetoolate.Sharp,warmtinglesran
downmyarms,spreadingacrossmyfingersasIsummonedthePrimalessence.A
silvery-whiteglowsiftedthroughthefur—
TheremainingCravenwailed,the
soundhigherandlouderthanbefore.EmilgruntedasIfelthimstumbleandthen
catchhimself.Abodyhitthefloorbesideusandthenahead.Channelingthe
eatherintoArden’sbody,Ifocusedallmywillonhim.Breathe.Live.
Breathe.Overandover,Irepeatedthosewords,likeIhadwiththesmall
girlwho’dbeenstruckbythecarriage.Theauraspreadoverhisbodyina
glitteringwebofeatherandthensankthroughthemattedfurandintothetorn
skinandtissue.Iwasn’ttoolate.Icouldn’tbe.Breathe.Breathe.I
funneledeverywonderfulandhappymemoryIhadintomyefforts.OnesofIan
andmeonthebeachwiththepeoplewhowouldalwaysbeourparents.HowIfelt
onmykneesintheloamysoilasaringwasslippedontomyfingerwhileI
staredintobeautiful,goldeneyes.Myentireworldbehindmyclosedlids
becamesilverandwhiteastheeatherpulsedandflareddeepwithinme—
“Poppy,”Kieranwhispered.
Nothingwashappening.
Theshrillshriekingstopped.
Heartcracking,Ilookedat
Arden’seyes.Theyremainedvacantandwithoutlife.Hischestdidn’tmove.I
pushedharder,handstremblingasthemistrecededandcleared.Blood.There
wassomuchblood.
Kieran’shandslidoffArdenand
foldedovermine.“Poppy.”
“Iwantedittowork.Iwanted—”
Araggedcrypartedmylips.
“Stop,”Kieranordered
quietly,liftingmyhands—myblood-smearedhands.Hepressedhislipstomy
knuckles.“He’sgone.Youknowthis.He’sgone.”
IshudderedasDelanoturned,
nudgingArden’spawwithawhimper.Anguishbuiltinmythroat,tartandtangy.
Itcamefromthem.Itcamefrommeasthefurthinnedout,andpale,blood-streaked
skinappeared.Ardenreturnedtohismortalform.
Pullingmyhandsfree,Irocked
back,closingmyeyes.Tearsburnedmythroat.Ididn’tknowArdenaswellasa
fewothers,butinEvaemon,he’dbecomemyshadow.Ihadbeengettingtoknow
him.Ilikedhim.Hedidn’tdeservethis.
Theothersbackedoffalittle,
allbutKieranandDelano.TheystayedwithArdenandmeasIkneltthere,eyes
closedasthesorrow—ice,ice-cold—andthathollowplacein
me—chillyanddark—heated.
“TheseCravenwereservants,”
Emilsaid,hisvoicerough.“Weren’tthey?”
“Theywere,”cameTasos’answer.
“That’sJaciella.AndRubens.Theywerebothaliveyesterday.Sowas…”Tasoscontinued,
rattlingoffthenamesofthosewho’dservedtheAscended.
“Theydidthis,”Kieransaid
quietly.Hisanger,hotandyetcold,reachedouttome,collidingwithmybuilding
fury
RunningmyhandoverArden’s
arm,Iopenedmyeyes.Theyweredry.Barely.
ThewhiteaurabehindKieran’s
pupilsglowedvividly,andthattastebuiltinmymouthagain.Thistime,it
throbbedinmychest,inmyheart,andattheverycoreofmybeing.“Locate
them,”Ibitout,reachingforandfindingmydagger.“Findthemandbringthem
tome.”
Moreservantshadbeenturned,butthey’dmadeitout
oftheundergroundchambers,somehowavoidingthesunlight.ValynandHisahad
dealtwithseveralonthesecondandthirdfloorsofCastleRedrock.
We’dbeenluckytohavemissed
themwhenweenteredthestairwell.
Untilweweren’t.
IstaredatwhereArdenlay,
shroudedinwhite,nexttotheguardsandthedeceasedCraven.Icountedthem.
Eighteen.TheAscendedhadturnedeighteenmortals.Someofthemlookedasifthey
hadfoughtback.Isawitonthebruisedknucklesandbrokennails.Theturned
mortalswouldbegiventhesamehonorasanyoneelse.
Footstepsechoedthroughthe
hall,andIturnedfromthebodies,seeingEmilandValyn.“Didyoufindthe
Ascended?”
Valynshookhishead.“Ibelieve
theyabandonedthecity.”
KierancursedasEmilnodded.“The
bastardsturnedtheservants,setthetrap,andleft.”
Mylipsparted.“Howcanwebe
sure?”
“We’vecheckedallthechambers
downhere,andthehomesneartheinteriorrisearebeingsearchedtoseeifany
areunderground,”Valynsaid,hisfeaturestense.“ButIbelievetheyleft.”
Everypartofmefocusedonhim,
andwhenIreachedoutwithmysenses,theshieldaroundhimwaseventhicker.
“Whatdidyoufind?”
Neitheransweredforalong
momentandthenValynsaid,“WhatIcanonlyimaginetobeamessage.”
“Where?”
“Inthechamberattheendof
thelefthall,”heanswered,andIstartedwalking,Delanoclosebehindme.
ValyncaughtmyarmasImovedpasthim.“Idon’tbelieveyouwanttoseeit.”
Dreadblossomed.“ButIneed
to.”
Heheldmygazeandthen
releasedmyarm,sayingquietlytoKieran,“Sheshouldn’tseethis.”
Kierandidn’ttrytostopme,only
becauseheknewbetter.
ThehallwasquietasIwalked
totheopenchamber,softlylitbyseveralcandlesIcouldalreadyseeplacedon
thefloor.MystepsslowedasInearedthemouthofthechamber,andIstoppedas
Isawinsideit.
Isawlegsfirst.
Dozensoflegs,swayinggently
amongcratesofwhatappearedtobewine.Slowly,Ilookedup.Slimcalves.
Bitemarksattheknees,theinnerthighs.Ishuddered.Wriststornopen.
Breastsmauled.Thegauzywhiteofaveil.Goldchainsholdingtheveilsin
place—goldchainssecuredtotheceiling,holdingtheminplace.
Kieranhadgonerigidbesideme
asDelanopressedagainstmylegs.Icouldn’tbreathe.Icouldn’tthinkorfeel
anythingbutthestirringeather,thesimmeringrage.Thesepeople…thesegirls…
Ipressedashakyhandtomy
stomachasIsawthewordsonthewallbehindthem,litbyrowsofcandles.
Wordswrittenindried,rusty-coloredblood.
Allyouwillliberateis
death.
Thehandofoneofthegirls
twitched.
Itookajerkystepback,andKieran
movedthen,curlinganarmaroundmyshoulders.Hegavemenochoice,guiding
mefromthechamberandawayfromthedoors.Iwouldn’thavefoughthimbecause
thatwas…
PullingawayfromKieran,I
leanedagainstthewallandclosedmyeyes.Istillsawthem,thebodies
drainedofblood.
“Poppy.”Kieran’svoicewastoo
soft.“Theywill—”
“Iknow,”Ibitout,stomach
churning.TheywouldbecomeCraven.Theyhadtobeclosetoitalready.
“We’lltakecareofit.”Emil’s
hoarsevoicereachedme.“We’llcovertheirbodiesandthenmakeitquick.They
willfindpeacesoon.”
Mymouthfelttoowet.“Thank
you.”
Therewasnothingbutsilenceas
Ifocusedonshovingtheessence—therage—down.Itpushedatmyskin,andfor
thebriefestmoment,Iimaginediterupting,levelingthecastle.Thecity.
Eventhen,thatexplosionofenergywoulddolittletoassuagethefury.I
swallowedhard,closingmyselfdown.Itwasn’teasy.Atremorcoursedthrough
me.
Delanoleanedagainstmylegs,
hisconcerngatheringaroundme.Poppy?
“I’mokay,”Iwhispered,
reachingdowntotouchthetopofhishead.Itookadeepbreath,openingmy
eyesonlywhenI…
WhenIfeltnothing.
“Whydidyouliebackthere?ToDelano?”
Istoppedatthefootofthe
circularstepsoftheTempleofTheonandlookedupatKieran.Backthere.
Inthosechambersunderground,whereArdenhadtakenhislastbreath.Back
there,wheretheservantshadbeenfeduponandlefttoturnintoCraven.Back
there,wherethosegirlshadbeenleftwiththatmessage.
Backtherehadleft
severalmarks
AndIhadafeelingtherewouldbe
morethatwouldcutintomyskinbeforethedaywasover.
“Whatdoyoumean?”Iasked,
notingthatValynhadalreadyclimbedthesteps,speakingtooneofthe
soldiers.IhadnoideawhereDelanohadgone.
Kierancrossedhisarms.
“Poppy.”
Isighed,lookingupatthe
entrancetotheTemple.ValynhadwalkedaheadandwasspeakingwithCyrnow.
Thelargecircularstructureonlyhadafewlongandnarrowwindows.“I’m…”
Ifeltalittlesick.Notphysically.
Iwastired.Again,notphysically.AndIfeltlikeI…likeIneededto
bathe—no,Ineededtoshower.Towashawaytheseconds,theminutes,
andthehoursofthisentireday.IwasworriedandfullofconcernasIstared
atthesmoothsurfaceoftheblackdoors.Iwasalsoafraidofwhatwaited
beyond.WhatVonettaandtheothershadfound.
Mostofall,I…IwantedCasteel
tobeherewithmesoIcouldtellhimhowIfelt.Toshouldersomeofthe
weight.Toreceivesomeofthesemarks.Tomakemesmileandevenlaughdespite
thehorroroftheday.Todistractmeandtakeawaytheachingcoldness.
“I’llbeokay,”Isaidhoarsely.
Hisgazesearchedmyfeatures.
“Whattheydidbacktheretothosegirls?Thatmessage?It’salltomesswithyour
head.Youcan’tletit.”
“Iknow.”
Exceptithad.Becauseitdidn’t
seemtomatterthatIwasn’ttheonewho’dkilledthemortalsatMassene,the
wolvenorthedraken,theservantsorthosegirls.Theystilldiedbecauseof
me.
Isquintedasthelate-afternoon
sunglintedofftheshadowstone.IlookedbeyondtheTempletowhereIcould
seethegoldenarmorofseveraloftheAtlantiansoldiersoutsideagrandmanor.
Sofar,alltheestateshadbeenfreeofvamprys.“Doyouthinkit’spossible
thatalltheAscendedleft?”
“Idon’tknow.”Kierannudgedmy
armwithhis.“Butwe’regoingtoneedtobepreparedincasethey’reholedup
somewhere.”
“Agreed,”Iwhispered.“We
shouldheadinthere.”
“Yeah.”Kieranfollowedmygaze,
exhalingheavily.“Weshould.”
Openingmysenses,Iletthem
stretchout.Itastedthetanginessofsorrowandsomethingheavier,almost
likeconcern.Itasteddread.Kieranwasn’tlookingforwardtowhatmightawait
intheTemple.“Areyouokay?”
“Iwillbe.”
Myeyesnarrowed.
Afaintgrinappeared,ahintof
teasingbeforeitdisappearedagain.WesaidnothingelseaswejoinedValynat
thetopoftheTemplestairs.
“Therearetunnelsunderthe
Temple,”Valynannounced,noddingatoneofthesoldiersIrecognizedasbeing
partofAylard’sregiment.“Linwasjusttellingmeaboutthem.”
Lin’sthroatworkedonaswallow.
“Therewasahiddenentrywayinthechamberbeyondthesanctum,”Linexplained.
“Itledtoatunnelsystemunderground—aprettyextensiveone.Therewere
chambersthere.”
Ihadasinkingfeelingthose
tunnelsconnectedtotheonesunderRedrock,whichledstraightouttothe
cliffs.WehadsuspecteduponourfirstvisittoOakAmblerthattheywere
usingthetunnelstomovemortalsaboutwithoutthembeingseenbyothers.Which
couldalsomeanthattheAscended,ifanyremained,couldusethemtotravelunseen.
“Theywere…chambers,Your
Highness.But…”Lintrailedoff.
“What?”KieranaskedasIopened
mysenses,tasting…tartness.Unease.
“Whatdidyousee?”Everymuscle
inmybodytensed.Iftheyfoundanythinglikewhatwehadseeninthatother
chamber,Ididn’tthinkIcouldtakeit.“Didyoufindanychildren?”
“Notyet,butwedidfindmenand
womeninwhiterobes.”
LikelyPriestsandPriestesses.
“Wherearethey?”
“Wehavetheminthesanctum.”
LindraggedahandoverhisfaceasIcameupthesteps.“Thetunnelsandchambers
arestillbeingsearched.”
Myhandscurledintofistsas
twosoldiersopenedthedoors.WeenteredthereceivingchamberoftheTemple,
passinganothersoldierwhostoodofftotheside,herfeaturesstarkasshe
staredatthewall.
Beamsofnarrowsunlight
streakedinfromthethinwindowsandcreptacrosstheshadowstonefloors.
Dozensofgoldcandelabralinedthewalls,theirflamesripplinggentlyasweentered
themouthofthesanctum.Therewerenopews.Onlyaplatformframedbythick,
blackcolumns.
Theysatinfrontofthe
platform.Sixofthem,wearingthewhiterobesofthePriestsandPriestesses
ofSolis.Theirheadswerebowed.Twofemales.Fourmales.Thosewhohadhair
woreiteithershornorpulledbackinalacy,whitecap.Theshapelessrobes
coveredtheirbodiesexceptfortheface,hands,andfeet.
Abaldheadlifted,glancing
pastmeandthenbouncingback.Hiseyeswidenedashewatchedmyapproach.“I
knowwhoyouare.”
Istoppedinfrontofhim,silent
astheremainingPriestsandPriestessesliftedtheirheads.Thevisageof
someoneIhadn’tgivenmuchthoughttotookshapeinmymind.Analia.
ThePriestessinMasadonia,whohadbeenresponsibleformyteachings
butpreferredtouseherhandasaformofeducation.Therehadbeenasingular
crueltytothatwoman,andIdidn’tknowifthosebeforemepossessedthesame
viciousstreak.ButIdidn’tdoubtthatAnaliaoranywhoservedintheseTemples
knewthetruthabouttheAscendedandtheRite.“Whatisyourname?”
“IamcalledFramont,”the
Priestanswered.“Andyou…youaretheonetheycalltheQueenofFleshand
Fire.We’vebeenwaitingforyousincebeforeyouwereborn.”
“Whatinthehellisthat
supposedtomean?”Valyndemanded,havingcomeupbehindus.
ThePriestdidn’tlookathim.
Hedidn’ttakehiseyesoffmeastensioncompressedmyspine.Ihadafeeling
Iknewwhathereferenced.“Theprophecy.”
FramontnoddedasKierandrewcloser
tome.“It’stimeforyoutofulfillyourpurpose.”
“Mypurpose?”I
repeated.“MypurposeistodestroytheBloodCrown—”
“Andremaketherealmsasone.”
Hiswordschilledmyskin.VessahadsaidthatIwouldremaketherealms.An
almostchildlikesmilecreptacrosshisroundedface.“Yes,thatisyourpurpose.
YouaretheChosen,spokenoflongbeforeyourbirth.Youwereforetold.
Promised.”
“Whatintheutterhellishe
talkingabout?”Cyrmutteredfrombehindme.
KieransentaquicklookatValyn.
“ThetunnelsunderRedrock—theylikelyconnecttothisTemple.Theyshouldbe
guardedimmediately.”TherewasintentioninKieran’swords,oneheavierthan
whathespoke.“Theyleadouttothecliffsbythesea.”
Valynpickeduponthemeaning.
TheformerKingpivotedonhisheel.“IwantallofyoutomakesurethatRedrock
issecure.Checkeverytunnelunderthecastleandsealoffthosepathways.”
Withinmoments,Valynhad
clearedtheTempleofallthegeneralsandsoldiers.OnlyHisaremained,andthat
wasasmartmove.AlthoughValynandHisahadferretedoutanymembersofthe
Unseenfromtheirranks,theirmethodsweren’tperfect.Weknewthatbecauseof
theattacktheUnseenhadlaunchedonusontheroadtoEvaemon.Butbeyond
that,anyonewhoheardtheprophecywouldassumethatitwasaboutme.
“Youspeakofprophecies,”I
said,refocusingonthePriest.“Ofthegreatconspirator—”
“Whois‘birthedfromthe
fleshandfireofthePrimals,’”hefinished.“And‘will
awakenastheHarbinger,theBringerofDeathandDestruction—’”
“Ihavebirthednothing,”Icut
himoff.
Thesmilegrew,flushinghis
face.“Notinaphysicalmanner.”
“How?HowhasaPriestinSolis
heardaprophecyspokenbyagodeonsago?”Valynpressed,eventhoughhealready
knew.Isbeth.“AprophecythatonlyahandfulofAtlantianshaveheard?”
“Becausewehavealwaysserved
theTrueKingoftheRealms.”Then,andonlythen,didFramontlookatValyn.
Hissmileturnedintoasneer.“AndtheAtlantianshavealwaysservedalie.”
Valynstiffenedandthenmoved
asiftostepforward.Iheldupahand,stoppinghim.“TheTrueKing?”
“Yes.”Framontspokethewordas
ifitwereabenediction.
ThePriestsandPriestesses
mightbelievetheyservedthegods,buttheyansweredtotheBloodCrown—whatI
wassuretheycalledtheTrueCrown.Andwhattheybelievedaboutthegodshadbeen
fedtothembytheAscended.WhichmeantthatthepersonFramontbelievedthis
TrueKingtobe,waswhoIsbethbelieveditshouldbe.
Andthatcouldonlybeoneperson.
Myupperlipcurledasanger
pulsedthroughme.“TheBloodQueenspokeoftheTrueCrowninhersummonses,”
IexplainedtoValyn.“WhodoyouthinkshewouldbelievetobetheTrueKing?”
“Malec,”Valynseethed.
Itmadesense,especiallysinceshe
nowknewthatMalecwasalive.Asuddenchillsweptthroughme.WhatifIsbeth
haddiscoveredwhereMalecwasentombed?
Godscouldn’tbekilledinthe
samemannerasthedeitieswhowereheldundertheChambersofNyktos,butthey
wouldn’tbeabletofeed.AndaccordingtoReaver,Malecwould’veneededto
feedmorethananormalgod.Hewould’veweakenedtoapointwherehemost
likelynolongerresembledanythingclosetowhohewas.Iimaginedatsome
pointhewould’velostconsciousness.
WhatifIsbethhadn’tused
Kolis’sessencetocreatethestorm?WhatifithadbeenMalec?Thatsoundedimpossible,
but…
“Keepacloseeyeonthem,”I
saidtoHisaandthenmotionedforValyntostepbackseveralfeetfromthe
PriestsandPriestesses.Kieranfollowed,listeningintentlyasIspokeina
lowvoice.“Idon’tknowhowmuchofwhathesaidistrueornot.Butwhatdo
youknowabouthowEloanaentombedMalec?”
“Sheusedoldmagic—whatkind
exactly,Idon’tknow—andbonechains,”hesaid,andIsuppressedashudderas
memoriesofthetwistedchainsofsharpbonesandancientrootssurfaced.
Nyktoshadcreatedthemethodofincapacitatinganybeingthatcarriedeather
inthem,bestowingthebonesofdeaddeitieswithsuchpower.Ididn’tneedto
thinkhardtorememberwhattheyhadfeltlikediggingintomyskin.“Theonly
wayhecould’veescapedthemisifsomeoneremovedthem.”
ItwaspossiblethatIsbethhad
figuredoutwhereMalecwasentombed.Ineededtobesure.Malecwastheaceup
mysleeve.ItwaswhatkeptCasteelalive.“WeneedtoknowexactlywhereMalec
wasentombedandanyothersafeguardsEloanamayhaveputinplace.”
Kieranfrowned.“Evenifthe
BloodQueenhadlocatedhim,theywouldneedtogetpasttheCraven.Which
wouldbedifficult—evenforwhateversheis.”
“Andafterallthattime?
Hundredsofyears?”Valynadded.“Hewouldn’tbeconscious.Idoubthewould
rememberhimself,letalonebeabletoseekretributionagainstAtlantia.”
“Wewouldthinkthat,buthe…heis
agod.ThesonoftheKingofGodsandhisConsort.Wehavenoideawhat
hewouldbecapableofifhesomehowwokeandhadtimetorecover.”Andblood,
lotsofblood.Iglancedbackatthoseinwhite.Framontstillsmiledasifa
hundredofhiswisheshadallcometrueatonce.Therewasnotellingwhatthe
BloodQueenhadtoldthePriestsandPriestessestoevokethiskindoffaith.
“Everythinghe’ssayingcouldbenothingmorethanmindgames.But…”
“Butweneedtobesure,”Valyn
agreed.“IwillgetwordtoEvaemonassoonaswe’redonedealingwiththis.”
Nodding,Iturnedbacktothetask
athandwhilemanythingspickedatmythoughts.Malecpossiblybeingthis
greatconspiratorthattheprophecywarnedaboutmadesense—andyet,didn’t.
Formanyreasons.Startingwith:whatcouldIpossiblyhavetodowithhim
waking?WhenIaskedFramont,heonlysmiledblissfullyupatme.Andwithno
onepresentwhocouldusecompulsion,Iknewwewouldn’tgetanymore
informationfromhimregardingthis.
Besides,therewassomethingthat
feltfarmoreimportantthatIneededtodealwith.Ishovedalltheother
stuffasidefornow.“Iwanttoknowwherethechildrenare.”
“They’reservingthe—”
“Don’t,”Icuthimoff.“Don’t
lietome.IknowthetruthbehindtheRite.Iknowthosetakendon’tserveany
godsortheTrueKingorCrown.SomearechangedintothingscalledRevenants.
Somearefedupon.Noneofthatinvolvesanactofservice.”
“Butitdoes,”Framont
whispered,aglintofeagernessinhisgaze.“Theyserve.Justasyoudo.Just
asyouwillalso—”
“Iwouldthinkverycarefully
aboutwhatyousaynext,”Kieranwarned.
Framontglancedathim.“Willyou
harmme?Threatenmewithdeath?Ifearnosuchthing.”
“Therearethingsfarworsethan
death.Likeherwhenshe’sannoyed.”Hejerkedhischininmydirection.“She
likestostabthingsthen.Butwhenshegetsangry?You’llseeexactlywhata
godiscapableof.”
ThePriest’seyesdartedtome,
andIsmiledtightly.“Idogetstabby.AndI’malreadyannoyedbyawholelist
ofthings.WherearethosegivenoverintheRite?”
Hedidn’tgetachancetoanswer.
“Wehavetwomoreofthem,”
Naillannouncedasheenteredthroughthesidedoor.“Andthey’renotmortal.
They’reAscended.”
Ilockedmyjaw.“Youhad
Ascendedhiddenwithyou?”
“AscendedserveintheTemples—serve
theTrueKing,”Framontsaid.“Theyalwayshave.”
“Youdidn’tknowthat?”Valyn
asked.
Ishookmyhead.“Iwasn’taround
manyofthem,”Itoldhim.“WhoallknewtheAscendedwereamongyou?”
“Onlythetrusted.”Helookedup
atmewithasortofwonderthatwasreallybeginningtoborderoncreepy.
“OnlytheCrown.”
ThentheDuchesswould’veknown.
TheywereapartoftheCrown.
Kierantiltedhisheadas
Vonettacamethroughthedoorway,leadinganotherPriestess.“Whereisthe
other?”
“Hewasn’tveryhappyabout
beingdiscovered,”Vonettasaidwithasneer.
ThePriestessVonettahadagrip
onsuddenlystumbledforwardintoabeamofsunlight.Thewomanshrieked,
jerkingback.Faintsmokewaftedfromherrobes,andthescentofburntflesh
hittheair.IturnedtoVonetta.
“What?”Herbrowsrose.“I
tripped.”
Istaredather.
Vonettasighed.“Shetriedto
biteme.”GrabbingholdofthePriestess’sarm,sheyankedthevamprybackand
shovedhertowardtheothers.“Morethanonce.”
“Didyoufindany…?”Iasked.
Shegaveacurtshakeofher
head.“Afewothersarestilldownthere,looking.”
“I’llshowyou.”AfemalePriestess
spokeup,andmyheadsnappedinherdirection.“I’lltakeyoutothem.”
Chapter16
“Ifthisissomesortoftrap,”Kieranwarned,“you
won’tlikewhathappens.”
“It’snot.”Herheadfinallylifted,
andIsawthatshewasyoung.Gods.NotmucholderthanI.Hereyeswerea
prettycornflowerblue.TheywerewideandeagerlikeFramont’s.
Crackingopenmysenses,Ireached
outtoher.Ididn’tfeelfear.Ididn’tknowwhatIfelt.Itwasn’t…nothing.
Itwasjustanemptinessthatwasn’tverydifferentfromwhatIfeltwhenI
triedtoreadanAscended.
“Whywouldyouagreetotakeus
tothemnow?”Iasked.
“Becauseitistime,”shesaid
softly.
MyhearttrippedasIstaredat
her,morethanalittleunnervedbytheresponse—byallofthis.“Show
me.”
ThePriestessroseandwalked
pasttheothersstillonthefloor,herheadbowed.VonettaandNaillleftthe
AscendedabovewithValynandthesoldierswho’dbeenwaitingoutside.They
joinedus,alongwithHisaandEmil,who’darrivedjustaswestartedleaving
thesanctum.Allofthemhadtheirswordsoutasweenteredtheemptychamber
andsteppedthroughthenarrow,tallbreakinthewallthatbecamevisible.
Torcheslinedthewall,casting
anorangeyglazealongthesteep,earthenstepsandwide-openchamberatthefoot
ofthem.Beyondthem,ninetunnelsconnectedtotheopening,eachlitbythe
faintglowoffire.
“It’slikeahive,”Hisamurmured
asshescannedthecircularspaceandthemanyopenings.
Theonlysoundwasthatofthe
Priestess’srobeswhisperingacrossthepackeddirtthatgavewaytostoneas
shetookatunneltoourright,andthatcorridorbranchedintotwomore.
Halfwaythroughthem,wemetupwiththeothers,whoIhadafeelingmight’ve
beenabitlostbasedontheearthyburstsofreliefIfeltfromthem.The
temperaturedroppedsignificantlyaswedescendedfartherundergroundtothe
pointwhereIfounditdifficulttobelievethatanymortalcouldsurvivelong
inthiskindofcold.Theairwasdry,butitchilledtheskinandsankinto
thebones.Myfingersbegantoachefromit.
ThePriestessreachedforoneof
thetorchesonthewall.Naillsteppedinclosetoher,keepinghisswordpoised
incaseshedidsomethingfoolish
Butallshedidwaswalkforward
andthentouchthetorchtoanother.Thejoiningofflamescastabrighter
lightuponthewall.Istopped.SodidKieran.Therockhadmarkscarvedinto
it—rockthatwasareddish-pinkcolor.
Hereachedout,tracinghis
fingersoveracarving,followingtheshape—
ThePriestesstouchedanother
torchwiththeonesheheldandsetoffachainreaction.Anentirerowof
torchesflamedtolife,fillingtheairwiththepungentscentofflint.The
undergroundsystemwassuddenlybathedinripplingfirelight.
“Whatinthegods’names?”
Kieranuttered,staringahead.
IbrushedpastVonetta,stepping
downintoawide,circularopening.Waterorsomethingmusthaverunthroughthe
cavernbefore,carvingjaggedformationsoutoftheceilinganddepositingwhat
appearedtobesomesortofreddishmineralallalongthespiralingandbizarre
formationsstretchingdown.
“Stalactites,”Naillsaid,and
severalgazesturnedtohim.Henoddedtowardtheceilingwithhischin.“That’s
whatthey’recalled.”
“Thatsoundslikeamade-up
word,”Emilsaid.
Naillarchedabrow.“It’snot.”
“Yousureaboutthat?”Emil
challenged.
“Yes,”Naillrepliedflatly.“If
Iweretocreateawordoutofthinair,Iwouldchoosesomethingmore…interesting.”
Emilletoutashortlaugh.
“Moreinterestingthanstalactites?”
“Careful,”Vonettawarnedas
whatsoundedliketwigssnappedundermystepswhenIwalkedforward.“Idon’t
thinkthosearerocksorbranchesonthefloor.”
Ilookeddown.Therewerechunks
ofsomethingivoryincolor,shardshereandthere,mixedwithslender,longer,
anddarker-colored—bones.Theyweredefinitelybones.
Oh,gods.
Kieranmadeasoundofdisgust
ashetoedasideapieceofrag,revealingwhatappearedtobeapartial
jawbone.“Thesedidn’tcomefromanimals.”
“AnimalsdonotservetheTrue
King,”thePriestesssaid,driftingforward.
Stomachchurningwithanger,I
startedtospeak,butwhatthePriestesswalkedpastcaughtmyattention.
Itwaslikethegroundhaderupted,
andsnake-likerootsspilledacrossthefloorofthecavernfromadeep,dark
hole.Therootswormedtheirwaythroughthediscardedbones—bonesthatwere
toosmall.Icarefullymademywayforward,avoidingthescatteredremainsas
muchasIcould.Somethingwasontherootsandunderthem.Something
dryandrusty-hued.Anditwaseverywhere,splatteredacrossthefloorand
pooledinthick,driedpuddles.Itwaswhathadstainedthewallsandthe
bizarrerockformationsthatpinkish-red.
Kieran’sarmbrushedmineashe
crouched,runningafingerthroughthesubstance.Hisjawclenchedashelooked
atme.“Blood.”
ThePriestessreachedtheother
sideofthecavernandtouchedherflametothewall.Oncemore,aseriesof
torcheslit.Lightsplashedacrossanarrowopeningandanothersunkenchamber.
Andthenwesaw…
“Goodgods,”Hisarasped,
bendingatthewaist.
Iopenedmymouth,butIwasbeyond
words.I’dbelievedthesightofthoseimpaledonthegates,andthemurdered
girlsfromearlier,hadbeenthemosthorrifyingthingsI’deverseen.
I’dbeenwrong.
Icouldn’tlookawayfromthe
pale,bloodlesslimbs—somelongandsomeso,sotiny.Thepilesof
fadedclothing,somewhiteandsomered,barelyholdingtogetherdried-out
huskswherepatchesofhairremained,andlegsandarmscurled.Withered.Some
droppedsidebysideintheceremonialredoftheRite,theirclothingfresh,
theirdecaynotevenbeguntotakehold.Dimly,Iwonderedhowtherecouldbe
nosmell—perhapsitwasthecoldorsomethingelse
MyheartstartedpoundingasI
staredintothesunken…tomb.Andthatwasexactlywhatthiswas.A
tombthathadbeeninuseforonlythegodsknewhowlong,fullofremains
haphazardlyleftabout.
ThePriestessquietlyplacedthe
torchintoaholderjuttingfromthewallandthenclaspedherhandslooselyat
thewaist.“Theyhaveallservedagreatpurpose.”
Slowly,almostpainfully,I
turnedtoher.Theeatherpulsedinmychestandswelled,pressingbeyondmeand
brushingagainstthewalls.Theairthickenedasiffilledwithchokingsmoke,
buttherewasnofire.Notoutsideofwhatburnedinsideofme.
“Justlikewealldo,”the
Priestesscontinuedsoftly,joyfully,andherfacelitupasifshe
spokeofagloriousdream.“Aswillyou,theonewhosebloodisfullofashand
ice.”
Isteppedforward,skinsparking
withPrimalessence,butanarmblockedme.“Don’t,”Kieranseethed.“Don’t
wasteanyenergyonher.It’snotworthit.”
Myhandsclosedaroundairasthe
Priestesssmiled,andhereyesclosed.Peace.ThatwaswhatItastedfromher.
Softandairylikespongecake.Peace
ThebreathItookwasfullof
daggers.“Giveherwhatshesoeagerlyawaits.”
Isteppedbackandturnedstiffly,
walkingaway.TheonlysoundIheardwasthatofaswordmeetingflesh.
“Isthatallofthem?”Iasked.
“TheTempleisempty,”Valyn
answeredstoically,staringatthebodiescarefullyplacedontheground—the
too-smallbodieswrappedinragswithsunkenstomachsandshriveled,paleskin.
Bodiestreatedworsethandiseasedcattle.
“Seventy-one,”Kieranstated.
“Thereareseventy-onethatare…”
Fresh
Seventy-onethatmusthavebeen
takenintheunexpectedlastRiteandtheonebefore.Thatnumberhadtoinclude
thesecondandthirdsonsanddaughters.Whichmeantnonehadbeengivenover
totheCourtaswasnormalforthesecond-born.Italsomeantthatthosewho
carriedthatnot-so-dormantemberoflifehadbeenslaughtered.
Evenworsewasthatthesoldiers
hadcarriedoutsidewhathadtobe…hundredsofolderremains.
I’dneverseenanything
likeit.
TheundergroundchamberinNew
Haven,withallthenamesetchedintothewallsofthosewho’ddiedatthehands
oftheAscended,paledincomparisontothis
Becausemostofthesebodies
belongedtochildren.Onlyafewmayhavebeenolder,liketheonesin
thechamberunderRedrock.Butthesewereinnocentchildren.Insomecases,babes.
Icouldn’tstopmyselffromthinkingaboutthatfloppy,stuffedteddybearthat
smelledoflavender.
Thebackofmythroatburnedas
aknotgatheredthere,tastingofhotangerandbitteragonythatwasn’tjust
mine.Isearchedoutthesource,findingCasteel’sfather.Hisfeaturesgave
nothingaway,buthisemotionshadbrokenthroughhisshieldsandprojected
outward,crashingthroughmine.
“Thatopeninginthefloorin
there?”Naillclearedhisthroat,takingastepbackasifthedistancecould
somehowerasewhathe’dwitnessed.“Itlookedlikesomesortofwell.Itgoes
deep.Realdeep.Wedroppedsomerocksdownit.Neverheardthem
land.”
Meaning,therecouldbemore.
Bodiesthathadeitherbeendumpedorhadfallenintothewell.Gods.
Openingmyeyes,Ilookedbehind
metowheremanyoftheAtlantiansoldiersstoodinsilence,andIknewwhatI
wouldfeelifIletmysensesstretch.Horror.Horrorsopotent,Iwouldnever
beabletowashitaway.TheyallknewwhattheAscendeddid,whattheywere
capableof,butthiswasthefirsttimethatmanyofthemwereseeingit.
“Whatwillwedowiththis
place?”Vonettaasked,herbacktotheTemple.
“Thereisonlyonething.”Ilifted
mychin,searchingthesky.Afewheartbeatslater,apurplish-blackdraken
brokethroughtheclouds.Theshoutsofsurprisefromthosewhohadremainedin
thecityechoedthroughthevalleyasReaverstretchedouthislargewings,
glidingoverhead.“Burnit,”Isaid,knowinghewouldcarrythrough,even
thoughhecouldn’thearme.“Wewillburnittotheground.”
Reaversweptupwithapowerfullift
ofhiswingsasValynasked,“Andwhatofthem?”
IturnedtothePriestsand
Priestessesclothedinwhite.ThetwoAscendedhadalreadybeendealt
with.Iopenedmysenseswidethen.Noneofthemfeltguiltorevenregret,and
thoseweretwovastlydifferentthings.Regretcamewhenitwastimetoface
consequences.Guiltwastherenomatterifonepaidfortheirsinsornot.I
wasn’tsureifitwouldhavechangedanythingiftheyhadfelteither
ofthosethingsinsteadofwhatIsensedfromthem.
Peace.
JustaswiththePriestess,they
wereatpeacewiththeiractions.
Theyhadn’tjuststoodby,doing
nothing.Theyweren’tmerelyanothercoginawheeltheycouldn’tcontrol.They
wereapartofit,anditdidn’tmatterifthey’dbeenmanipulatedintotheirfaith.
Theyhadbeentakingchildren,nottoserviceanygodorTrueKing,buttofeed
theAscended.
“Putthemontheirknees.”Iwalked
forward,reachingforthewolvendaggeratmythigh.“Facingthebodies.”
Valynfollowedasthesoldiers
obeyed.“Youdon’thaveto—”
“Iwillnotaskanyofyoutodo
whatIwouldnotdomyself.”IstoppedinfrontofthekneelingFramont.His
eyeswereshut.“Openyoureyes.LookatthemAllofyou.Lookatthem.Notat
me.Them.”
FramontdidasIdemanded.
Aflashofsilveryfirelitthe
darkeningskyasReavercircledthestoneTemple,unleashinghiswrath.“Iwant
themtobethelastthingyouseebeforeyouleavethisrealmandenterthe
Abyss,forthatissurelywhereeachofyouwillfindyourselves.Iwanttheir
bodiestobetheverylastthingyoucommittomemory,asitwillbethelast
thingthefamilieswhoclaimtheirownwilleverrememberfromthisday
forward.Lookatthem.”
ThePriest’seyesshiftedtothe
bodies.Theyweren’tfilledwithawethistime.Theyweren’tfilledwithanything.
Hestaredatthemandsmiled.
Smiled
Iswungoutmyarm.Redsprayedthe
whiteofmyarmorasIdraggedthebloodstonebladeacrosshisthroat.
ThereceivinghallandbanquetchamberofRedrockhad
becomeaninfirmarybynightfall.Injuredsoldiersandwolvenhadbeenlaidout
oncots.BannersbaringtheBloodCrownRoyalCresthadalreadybeenstripped
fromthechamberandthroughoutthecastle.
NoOakAmblerguardsorSolis
soldiershadbeenmerelywounded.Nosurvivableinjuries.Thosewhohad
surrenderedwereunderguardattheCitadel’sjail,andItriednottolinger
onthoughtsofexactlyhowmanyliveshadbeenlostasImademywaythrough
thenow-mostly-emptycots.JustasItriednottothinkaboutwhathadbeen
undertheTempleofTheon—whathadbeendonetothechildren.
I…Ijustcouldn’tthinkaboutit.
So,I’dgonefromonewoundedto
another,healingthem.Ididit,thinkingthatsinceitwasanabilitythathad
developedbeforeIAscended,itcouldn’tweakenmetoobadly.
That,ofcourse,couldbe
dangerouslyfaultylogic,butitgavemesomethingtodothatwas
helpful,whileagroupwenttoinformthepeopleofOakAmblerthattheywould
beabletoreturntotheirhomestomorrow.
Iplannedonspeakingtoeveryone
inthemorning.Allofthem.Thefamilies.RamonandNelly.Mystepsfelt
heavy.
“Youlooktired,meyaah
Liessa,”SagenotedasIapproachedher,thelastoftheinjured.Sprawled
outonthecot,hershort,darkhairwasaspikymess.Athinsheetwastucked
underherarms,coveringherbodyentirelyexceptforthelegthatanarrow
juttedfrom.Ithadbeenleftintopreventadditionalbleeding,andIknewit
hadtohurtsomethingfierce.I’dtriedtocometohersooner,butshe
continuouslywavedmeoffuntileveryoneelse,includingthosewithmuchless
severeinjuries,weretreated.
Iloweredmyselfontothefloorbeside
her,gratefultonolongerbewearingthearmor.“It’sbeenalongday.”
“Andthensome.”Sheleanedback
onherelbows.Afinesheenofsweatdottedherbrow.“We’llhavemoredayslike
this.”Hergazeshiftedawayfromme.“Won’twe?”
Iknewwhereshelooked.They’d
broughtinawolvennamedEffie.He’dbeeninbadshape,havingtakenaspear
tothechest.I’dknownhewasgonewhenIkneltbesidehim,butadesperate
sortofchildishhopehaddrivenmetotry.Myabilitieshadworkedonthe
Atlantiansoldierwhohadpassed.AyoungmalewhoonlyNaillandIhadseen
takehislastbreath.He’dcomerightback,alittlegroggyanddisorientated
butalive.Notsoforthewolven.OrArden.
Ihadn’tmisunderstoodwhat
Reaverhadsaid.OnlythePrimalofLifecouldbringbackthoseoftwoworlds.
We’dlostfivewolvenandclose
toahundredAtlantiansoldiers.Wewould’velostmoreiftheirinjurieshadbeen
leftuntreated.Butstill,anylosswastoomuch.
“I’msorry,”Isaid,myheart
twistingasIthoughtaboutwhatCasteelhadoncetoldme.Nearlyhalfofthe
wolvenhaddiedintheWarofTwoKings.Theyhadonlybeguntoreclaimthose
numbers.Ididn’twanttoleadthemintothatmanydeathsagain.
Hergazecuttome.“I’msorry,
too.”
Chestheavy,Ishovedatthe
longsleevesofthewhitetop.Theykeptslippingdown.“Naill?”Iglancedover
myshoulder.“Ineedyourhelp.”
“Ofcourse.”Heloweredhimself
besideme,farmoregracefulthanI,andhestillworehisarmor.WearinessI
feltinmysouletchedintothelinesaroundhismouthashecarefullygripped
thearrow.Heknewthedrillbynow.“Letmeknowwhen.”
ImetSage’seyes.“Thiswill
hurt.”
“Iknow.Thisisn’tthefirst
timeI’vebeenhitbyanarrow.”
Mybrowsrose.
Agrinappeared.“Itinvolveda
darethatwenthorriblywrong.Longstory.MaybeI’lltellyouaboutitlater?”
“Iwouldlikethat.”Iwasvery
curiousaboutadarethatinvolvedanarrow.“IwilltakethepainasfastasI
can,but…”
“Yeah,I’mgoingtofeelitwhen
hepullsitout.”Sagedraggedinadeepbreath.“I’mready.”
Placingmyhandsoneitherside
ofthearrow,Isummonedtheeatherandgotdowntobusiness.“Now.”
Naillyankedthearrowfreewith
aquicknessbornofexperience.Sage’sentirebodyspasmed,butshemadenosound.
NothinguntilIheardasighofreliefandthejaggedholeinherthigh
stitcheditselftogether,theskinnowabright,rawpink.
“Thatwas”—Sage’sroundeyes
blinked—“intense.”
“Better,though?”
“Unbelievablyso.”Shegingerly
curledherlegandthenstraightenedit.“I’vewatchedyoudothis,overand
over.Andstill,it’s…intense.”
Ismiledfaintly,rockingback.
“I’mnoHealer,soIdon’tknowhowmuchofthewoundhealsimmediately.Iwould
takeiteasyforthenextcoupleofdays.”
“Norunningaroundordancing…”
Shetrailedoff,hereyeswideningashergazefixedovermyshoulder.“What
the…?”
NaillandIfollowedhergaze.
MymouthdroppedopenastheAtlantianmadeachokedsound.
Walkingthroughthehallwasa
tallblondwearingwhatappearedtobeasheetknottedatthehips—barely
knotted.Witheachlong-leggedstep,thesheetappearedmerecentimetersfromslipping
away.
“Reaver,”Iwhispered,alittle
rattledbythesightofhim.
Naillmadethatsoundagain.
“That’sthedraken?”Sageasked,
andIrealizedshemustnothaveseenhiminhismortalformbefore.
“Yep.”
“Really?”Sheeyedhim.“Yum.”
Nailllookeddownather,his
jawslack.“Hecanbreathefire.”
“Andthat’sabadthing?”
Thankfully,Nailldidn’tanswer
becauseReaverhadreachedus.Henoddedattheothertwoandthenbowed
slightlyinmydirection,causingthesheettoslipalittlemore.
“Weneedtofindsomeclothingfor
you,”Isaid,rememberingwhatIhadaskedofKieran.IdoubtedReaverwould
fitintoanythingtheDukehadworn.“Likeassoonaspossible.”ThenIthought
oftheotherdraken.“Weneedtofindalotofclothing.”
“Youpeopleandyourconcerns
aboutnudityistiresome,”Reaverreplied.
“Ihaveabsolutelynoproblem
withnudity,”Sageannounced.“JustthoughtI’dshare.”
Reavergrinned.
Andmyheartgaveanothershaky
skipbecauseIhadn’tbeenwrongwhenI’dthoughttheupwardcurveofhislips
tookallthoseinterestingfeaturesandmadethemintosomethingstunning.
Igavemyheadashake.“Is
everythingokay?”
“Itis.”Reaverfacedme.“I
wantedtoletyouknowthatAureliaandNithereturnedtoThad,”hesaid,
referencingtheremainingdrakenwhohadstayedbackattheencampment.“They
willreturntoRedrocktonightwhenit’slesslikelythey’llbeseenbymortals.”
“Goodthinking.”Ihadn’t
thoughtofthat.“Willyou…?”Irose,andawhooshwentthroughme.
Thefloorstumbled.OrIdid.“Whoa.”
Naillwasimmediatelybymy
side,hishandonmyarm.“Areyouokay?”
“Yeah.Justalittledizzy.”I
blinkedthebright,flashinglightsfrommyeyesintimetoseethatSagehad
alsostood.“Youshouldstillbesitting.I’mfine.”
Shewatchedme,makingnomove
tosit.
“It’sbeenalongday,”Ireminded
her.Iwastired.Weallwere.
“Haveyoueaten?”Reaverasked,drawing
myattentiontohim.
Ifrowned.“Ihaven’thada
chancesincemorning.Beenkindofbusy.”
“Youshouldmaketimeforthat,”
headvised.“Now.”
Consideringhowtheworldhadgone
topsy-turvy,Icouldn’treallyargue,soIendedupinthekitchenswitha
drakendressedinonlyasheethangingonfordearlife,sharingaplateof
slicedhamthatmust’vebeenleftoverfromthedaybefore.
Cometofindout,drakendideat
actualfood.Thankthegods.
WithNaillfeelingconfident
thatbetweenReaverandI,weweremorethancapableofhandlingourselves,
he’dgoneofftocheckinwithHisa.Itwasquiet.ProbablybecauseIwasstuffing
myface.
AndwherewasKierantonot
witnessthisandcommentonhowmuchIwaseating?
Ihadn’tfeltthishungrysincethe
firsttimeI’dbeentoCastleRedrock.
Butthinkingofeverythingthat
stillneededtobedonetampeddownmyappetite.Ineededtotalktothe
people.Thefamiliesofthepoorchildren.Theimprisonedsoldiers.Thelist
wenton.Itwas…alot.
Alotofresponsibilities
thatIhadnoexperiencewith.
Ilookedaroundthekitchens,
tryingtoimaginewhatthespacelookedlikewithcooksatthecounter,steam
rollingoffthestoves,andpeoplerushingtoandfro.Andthenthatmademe
wonderiftheservantshadanyclueabouttheAscended.Hadtheybeen
completelyblindsided?Orhadsomehelpedferryinmortals,preparingtheminstead
ofroastedham?
Gods,thatwasadarkthought.
“Doesitnotmakeyoufeelodd
tobeeatinginhere—eatingtheirfood?Likewetooktheircityandnowwe’re
takingtheirfood?”
Sittingbesidemeonthe
counter,Reavercockedhishead.“Ihadn’teventhoughtofthat.”
“Oh.”Istaredatachunkof
ham.Perhapsthatwasn’tanentirelynormalconcerntohave.Itprobablywasn’t.
ButIknewwhyIwasthinkingaboutthatinsteadofwheremymindwantedtogo.
Istoppedfighting.“Ican’tstopthinkingaboutthegirlsunderhereandthose
children.Ican’tunseeeitherthing.Ican’tunderstandhowthosewhoserved
intheTemplewereatpeace—howanyone,mortalorAscendedorwhatever,cando
thosekindsofthings.”
“Maybewe’renotsupposedto,”
Reaversaid,andIglancedathim.“Maybethat’swhattrulyseparatesusfrom
them.”
“Maybe,”Imurmured.“Framont—the
Priest—spokeofaTrueKingoftheRealms,asifthechildrenhadbeenkilled
inservicetohim.”
“TheTrueKingoftheRealmsis
Nyktos,andhewouldnotapproveofsuchathing.”
“Didn’tthinkso.”Ifinished
offthepieceofhamandreachedforalinen.“Idon’tthinkhewastalking
aboutNyktos,though.Butmaybe…Malec?”
Reaver’sbrowsshotup.“That
wouldbeunfortunateifhebelievedthat.”
Igrinned,butitquicklyfaded.
Severalmomentsofquietpassedbetweenus,andinthattime,IsawArdenand
Effie.ThesoldiersandmortalswhosenamesIdidn’tknow.“Peoplediedtoday,”
Iwhispered.
“Peoplealwaysdie.”Hereached
overandpickedupanapplefromthebushel.“Especiallyinwar.”
“Thatdoesn’tmakeitanyeasier.”
“Itjustmakesitwhatitis.”
“Yeah.”Iwipedmyhands.“Arden
diedtoday.”
Heloweredtheapple.“Iknow.”
“Itriedtobringhimbackto
life.”
“Itoldyouitwouldn’tworkonanyone
oftwoworlds.”
“Ihadto—”
“Youhadtotryanyway,”hefinished
forme,andInodded.Hetookabite.“Shedoesn’tlikelimitationseither.”
“Who?”
“TheConsort.”Turningthe
apple,hewenttoworkontheotherside.
“Ihavenoproblemwithlimitations.”
Reaverslidmealonglook.“I
haven’tknownyouforlong,butIknowyoudon’tlikelimitations.Ifyoudid,
youwouldn’thavegoneonandtriedtorestorelifetoanotherwolven,even
afterknowingyoucouldn’t.”
Hehadmethere.
Reachingforthetankard,Itook
adrink.“I’mguessingthePrimalofLifeprobablyisn’tthrilledwithme
restoringlife,huh?”
Helaughed,thesoundhoarseand
untried
“What’ssofunny?”
“Nothing.”Reaverloweredthe
apple.“Nyktoswouldbeconflictedoveryouractions.Ononehand,hewouldnever
notbehappyaboutarenewaloflife.Ontheother,hewouldworryaboutthe
natureofthings.Thecourseoflifeanddeathandhowsuchanintervention
altersthebalance—thefairness.”Thecornerofhislipstiltedup,
softeningthesharpfeatures.“WhenitcomestotheConsortandchoicetoactor
not,shewouldweightheconcerns,tossthemaside,hopenoonewaspayingattention,
andjustdoit.”Duskylashesliftedashegavemeasidewaysglance.“Sound
familiar?”
“No,”Imuttered,andReaverchuckled,
thesoundjustasroughasthelaugh.“WhydoestheConsortsleepsodeeply
whenNyktosdoesn’t?”
Reaverlookeddownathisapple,
notspeakingforseverallongmoments.“It’stheonlywaytostopher.”
Chapter17
Mybrowsflewup.“Stopherfromwhat?”
“Fromdoingsomethingshe’d
regret,”Reaversaid,andmystomachlurched.“Bothofhersonsweretakenfrom
her.Neithermaybedead,butneitherarereallyalive,arethey?”
No.Theyreallyweren’t.
“She’sangry.Furiousenoughto
forgetwhosheis.Enoughtocausethekindofharmthatcannotbeundone.”
Ididn’tknowwhatitwaslike
tobeamotherandtohaveachildtakenfromme,butIknewwhatI’ddonewhen
Iandied.IknewwhatI’ddonewhenIlearnedCasteelhadbeentaken.So,in
somesmallway,Icouldunderstandheranger.
Hisgazeflickedtotherounded
archway.“Whenwillweleaveforthecapital?”
“Iwillspeaktothepeople
tomorrow.”Mythroatdried.“Andthefamilies.”
“That…thatwillnotbeeasy.”
“No,itwon’tbe.”Iloweredthe
tankardtothecounter.“We’llleavethedayafter.”
“Good.”Hepaused.“Wemustnot
forgetaboutIres.”
“Ihaven’t.”
“Hemustreturnhome.”Hisgaze
remainedfixedontheentrance.“Herecomesyourwolven.”
“AsIsaidbefore,he’snotmy
wolven,”Isnapped,justasKieranappearedinthedoorway.
Hestoppedmid-step,hiseyes
wideningslightly.
“Surprised?”Reaverasked.
Kieran’sexpressionsettledinto
onethatcouldonlybedescribedasblandboredom.“I’munusedtoseeingyounot
pickingyourteethwithyourclaws.”
“Icandothatnowifitmakes
youfeelbetter,”Reaverremarkedandthenbitintotheappleagain.
“Notnecessary.”Kierangavehim
theonce-over,hiseyebrowrisingasheturnedtome.“He’swearingasheet.”
“Andthat’swhyIsaidheneeded
clothing.”
Reaverfrownedaroundhisapple.
“Doyouexpectmetowearhisclothing?”
“What’swrongwithmyclothes?”Kieran
demanded.
AfairbrowroseasReaver
mimickedKieran’searlierlook.“Idon’tbelievetheywillfitme.Ihavebroader
shoulders.”
“Idon’tthinkso,”Kieran
replied.
“Andchest.”
Kieran’sarmscrossed.“You
definitelydonothavethateither.”
“Andmylegsarenotthintwigs
thatcouldsnapunderabreeze,”Reavercontinued.
“Areyouserious?”Kieranlooked
downathimself.Hedidn’thave…twiglegsorwhatever.
“Reaver.”Isighed.
Heliftedabareshoulder.“Just
saying.”
“You’rejustsayingnonsense.
Youbotharenearlythesameheightandsize,”Isaid.
“Ibelieveyourvisioncoulduse
improvement,”thedrakenresponded,andIrolledmyeyes.
“Youcoulduseanattitude
improvement,”Kieranretorted.
“Iatealotofham,”I
announcedtoKieranbeforeReavercouldfirebackanotherbarb.Bothmales
lookedatme.“Alot.You’dbeproud.”
“WhileI’mgladtohearthat,”
Kieranbegan,“thatwasalittlerandom,Poppy.”
“Yeah,well,I’mfeelingrandom.”
Iscootedoffthecounter.“Wereyoulookingforme?”
“Whatelsewouldhebedoing?”
Reaverasked.
Kieran’seyesnarrowedonthe
draken.“Literallyanythingthatdoesn’tincludesittinginnothingbutasheet
andeatinganapple.”
“So,notmuch,then?”Reaver
quipped.
“Reaver,”Isaid,shootinghima
look.“StopantagonizingKieran.”
“Ihavedonenosuchthing,”the
drakendenied.“Heisjustoverlysensitive…forawolven.”
Kieran’sarmsunfoldedashe
steppedforward.
Iheldupahand.“Don’tstart.”
“Start?”Heturnedtome.“What
exactlyhaveIstarted?Ijustwalkedinhere.”
“See?”Reavertossedtheapple
coreintoanearbybin.“Sensitive.”
“Andyouneedtostop,”Isaid,planting
myhandsonmyhips.“Igetit.Kieranalmoststeppedonyourtail.”Iturned
tothewolven.“Reaveralmostbityourhand.Stopwhiningandgetoverit.”
“Healmoststeppedonmyentire
leg,”Reavercorrected.“Notmytail.”
“Andhealmostbitmyarmoff.”
Kieran’seyesnarrowed.“Notmyhand.”
Istaredatthem.“Youtwoare…I
don’tevenknow.”InarrowedmystareonKieranwhenhestartedtorespond.He
wiselyclosedhismouth.“So,wereyoulookingforme?”
“Iwas,”hesaid,andReaver
wiselykepthismouthshut.“Ineedyourspecialhands.”
Inotherwords,someoneneeded
tobehealed.Itwasn’thim.Ipickedupnosignsofpainfromhim.Onlyacidic
annoyance.“Who’sinjured?”
“Perry.”
“Perry?Didsomethinghappenin
Massene?”Itookadeepbreath.AtleastnowIknewwhereDelanohad
disappearedoffto.“Hedidn’tremainatMassene,didhe?”
“Nope.”
“Gods.”Istartedforward.“How
badlyisheinjured?”
“Tookanarrowintheshoulder,
cleaninandout,”Kierantoldme.“Hesaysit’sjustafleshwound,butfrom
thelooksofit,it’snot.He’dhealfromitinadayortwo,butDelano’sworried.”
IstartedtoaskwhyPerry
didn’tjustfeed,butthenIrememberedCasteel’sunwillingnesstodosofrom
someonewhenheneededto.Whathehadfeltforme,beforehewasevenwilling
toacknowledgeit,hadbecomeamentalblockthathehadn’tbeenabletoget
pastuntilI’dAscendedandneededtofeeduponawakening.Itcouldbethesame
forPerry.
“Let’sgo,”Isaid.
“Shewasdizzyearlier,”Reaver
announced.Myheadjerkedinhisdirection.Helookedutterlyunapologetic.
“Afterhealingallthosewhowereinjured.”
“What?”Kieranlookeddownat
me,hispaleeyessharp.
“I’mfine.Ihadn’teaten,which
iswhyIdevouredwhatprobablyaccountsforhalfapig.”
Kieranwasn’tassured.“Maybe
youshouldsitthisoneout.He’llhealeventually—”
“Idon’twanthimtosufferor
forDelanotoworryabouthim.I’mfine.IwouldtellyouifIwasn’t.”
Amuscletickedalonghisjaw.
“Ihaveafeelingthat’salie.”
“SomethingIthinkwecanagree
on,”Reaverchimedin.
“Nooneaskedyou,”Ishotback.
“So?”
Iexhaledslowly.“IthinkI
likeyoubetterinyourdrakenform.”
“Mostwouldagreewithyouon
that.”Pickingupanotherapplefromthebushel,Reaverbrushedpastusinhis
sheet.“IthinkIwilltakeanap.”Hepausedatthearchway.“Iknowyou’re
notnearlyasgracefulasmostwolven,butpleasedonotsteponmewhileI’m
sleeping.”Andwiththatpartingshot,Reaverleftthekitchens.
“Ireallydon’tlikehim,”Kieran
muttered.
“Neverwould’veguessedthat.”I
turnedtohim.“Where’sPerry?”
Ittookhimhalfaminuteto
draghisattentionfromtheentryway.Ihadafeelingheusedthattimeto
convincehimselfnottogoafterthedraken.“Youweredizzy?”
“Barely.Istoodupquickly,and
it’sbeenalongdaywithlittlesleepandnotenoughfood.Ithappens.”
“Eventogods?”
“Iguessso.”
Kieraneyedmeclosely,inaway
thatwasalmostasintenseasCasteelwouldlookuponme.Asifheweretrying
toferretoutthingsIwasn’tsaying.“Doyoustillfeelhungryaftereatingnearly
anentirepig?”
Inevershould’vesaidthat,but
Iknewwhathewasgettingat.“Idon’tneedtofeed.Canyoutakemeto
Perry?”
Kieranfinallyrelentedandled
meouttoabackstairwell.“Perrycanfight,”hesaidafterIaskedwhyPerry
hadn’tstayedbehind.“He’strainedwithaswordandbow.NearlyallAtlantians
areaftertheCulling.”
Ihadn’tknownthat.
TherewasalotIstilldidn’t
knowaboutthepeopleInowruledandwasresponsiblefor.And,gods,didn’t
thatmakemyheartstartracing?
“Andthatgoesforchangelings
andthoseofmortalbirth?”Iasked.“Isitarequirement?”
“Itgoesforallwhoareableto
doso.”Kierankepthispaceslowasweclimbedthenarrow,windowlessstairs.
“Butthey’renotrequiredtojointhearmies.Thatistheirchoice.Thisisso
allcandefendthemselves.Perry’sasskilledasanysoldier.Abitrusty,buthis
fatherwantedhimtofocusmoreonthelandtheyownedandshipping.”
“IsthatwhatPerrywants?”
“Ithinkso.”Kieranopenedthe
dooronthesecondfloortoawidehalllitwithgaslamps.“ButIdon’tthink
hewantstostaybackwheneveryoneelseisfighting.”
Buteveryoneelsewasn’t
fighting.YoungerAtlantiansservedascouriersandstewards.Helpedprepare
mealsandrunaslewoferrands.
Kieranledthewaydownthehall,
stoppingbeforeadoorleftajar.Herappedhisknucklesoffthewood.
“Comein,”camethemuffled
responseIrecognizedasDelano.
Pushingopenthedoor,Kieran
steppedinside.Ifollowed,givingthespaceaquickscan.Thechamberwas
smallandoutfittedwiththenecessities,butairywithalargewindowoverlooking
thecliffsthatallowedtherapidlyapproachingnighttoseepinside.Therewas
anadjoiningbathingchamberthathadtobeawelcomeadditionafternearlyamonth
oflivinginanencampmentandthenthemanorinMassene,whichhadn’tfelt
muchdifferentthanthetents.
Perrylaystifflyonabed,
proppedupbyamoundofpillows.Gauzepackedthewoundonhisbareshoulder,
thematerialturningpink.Onelookatthetensesetofhisjawandthefine
sheenofsweatonhisbrow,andIknewhewasinpain.Itscratchedhotlyatmy
skinasDelanolookedoverhisshoulderfromwherehesatinachairbesidethe
bed.Hisreliefbecameearthyandrichuponseeingme.
“Youdidn’thavetotellher,”
Perrysaid,hisambergazeshiftingfromKierantome.“I’llbefine.Itoldhim
that.”HelookedatDelano.“Itoldyouthat.”
“Iknow,butI’mhere.There’s
noreasonforyoutobeinpainwhenIcanhelp.”
“There’snoreasonforyoutobe
botheredwithmewhenyouhavesomuchtodo,”theAtlantianargued.
“Iwillalwayshavetimetohelp
myfriends.”Iwalkeduptothebed,realizingDelanohadabookopenonhis
lap.“Whatareyoureading?”
Twopinksplotchesformedinhis
cheeks.“Um,it’sabookPerryfoundintheshipcabinyouandCasstayedin,
actually.”
Myeyeswentwideastheyshot
backtowhatlayinhislap.Therewasonlyonebookthatwould’vebeenonthat
ship.
Thatgodsdamnjournal.
“Willahaslivedquitethe
interestinglife.”Perrygrinnedweaklyfromthebed.“Didn’tknowhow
interesting,though.”
“Youbroughtthatsexbookwith
youontheship?”Kieranaskedfromwherehenowstoodbythewindow.
“Ididnotbringitwithme.
Casteelbroughtit.”
“Likelystory,”Kieranmurmured,
eyesglimmeringwithahintofamusement.
“Whatever,”Imuttered,making
mywaytotheothersideofthebed,whereIsatcarefullyanddideverything
inmypowernottothinkabouthowCasteelhadmereadfromthejournalashe
enjoyedhisdinner
“Ihaveaquestion,”Perrysaid
asIreachedforhim.“DidyoureadthisbeforeyoumetWilhelmina?”
“Idid.Thejournalwasinthe
cityAtheneuminMasadonia,andtheLadiesinWaitwerealwayswhisperingabout
it,”Isaid,breathingthroughthepinchingsadnessforDafinaandLoren.“I
didn’tevenknowthatshewasanAtlantian,letaloneachangelingandSeer.
NeitherdidCasteel.So,youcanimaginetheshockwhenwemetherinEvaemon.”
“Icanonlyimagine.”He
chuckledsoftly,wincing.“IbetCashadafielddaywiththat.”
Afaintsmiletuggedatmylips
asIplacedmyhandsjustbelowthebandage.Theessencepulsedintensely,
flowingtowardmyspecialhands.Iwatchedthelightmovefrommyfingers
anddisappear.Thesilveryglowgavehisbrownskinacoolerundertonethan
usual.Thetightmusclesofhisarmloosenedwithinseconds.Iliftedmygaze
tohisface,seeinghislipspartwithadeeper,longerbreath.
Delanomoved,stretchingtoreach
forthebandage.Hegingerlyliftedit.Then,hetookadeeper,longerbreath.
Hiseyesmetmine,andhislipsspokeasilent,“Thankyou.”
Inodded,easingmyhandsfrom
PerryasDelanoclaspedhischeekwithonehand.Hestoppedtopresshis
foreheadagainsttheAtlantian’sandthenkissedhim.Withmysensesstillopen,
thesweetandsmoothtasteIhadn’trecognizedthefirsttimedancedacrossmy
tongue.Chocolateandberries.
Love
Icouldn’tstayasleep,jerkingawakeeveryhouronthe
hour,seeingthoseguardstornapartinthehallbytheCravenwho’dbeenmortals
hoursbefore.IkeptseeingArdenchargingforwardandthenfindinghim,his
furmoreredthansilverandwhite.Gentlyswayinglegsandveiledfaces
hauntedme.Andthosebodies.Allthosebodiesbeingcarriedoutbythesoldiers.
Itallreplayed,overandover.
AlongwiththeCraven’sshrill
shrieks.Ilayonmysideandstaredatnothing.Myskinwascold.Myinsides
feltaschilledasthetombunderground.Itriedtofocusonthewarmthpressed
againstthebackofmylegs,whereKieransleptinhiswolvenform,butmymind
latchedontootherthings.
Whowerethosegirls?Ididn’t
thinktheyweretakenintheRite.Ifso,wouldn’ttheyhavebeeninthe
Temple?Weretheychildrenoftheservantsslaughteredhere?Hadtheybeen
stolenfromtheirhomes?
Andtheoneswe’dfoundunderthe
Temple,hadtheirsoulsbeentrappedthere?Itwasbelievedthatbodiesmustbe
burnedforasoultobereleasedtoentertheVale.Ididn’tknowifthatwas
true,oriftheceremonialburningofthebodywasmoreforthemournersthan
thedeceased.ButallIcouldthinkaboutwasthosepoorchildrenlostunder
there,aloneandscaredandsoverycold—
IsuckedinashakybreathasIreached
up,claspingCasteel’sring.Howcouldanyonetakepartinsomethinglikethat?
Whatcouldtheybelieveinsofully,socompletely,thattheywereableto
justifythat?Whatallowedthemtoliveeachday?Tobreatheandeatandsleep?
Howcouldshedosomethinglikethis?Shewasapartofthis.Thecause.
She’dconvincedthosePriestsandPriestessestodoherbidding.Madesurethe
AscendedweremadeandturnedintosomethingjustashorridastheCraven.
HowcouldIbeapartofIsbeth?
Iwas.Isharedherbloodline,nomatterhowdesperatelyIwanteditnottobe
true.Howcouldthatbemymother?Hadshealwaysbeenlikethis?When
shewasamortal?Hadthelossofhersonandheartmatedonethis?Hadthepain
ofsuchalosstrulyshapedherintoamonsterutterlyincapableofcaring
aboutanythingbutrevenge?
MythroatdriedasIheld
Casteel’sringtighter.CouldIbecomelikeher?IfsomethinghappenedtoCasteel?
Ifhe…ifhewerekilled,wouldIbecomenothingmorethanwrathandpoisonthat
onlyliberateddeath?
I’dalreadybeenclose.
Soclosetolosingmyselfin
thatpain.Andhewasstillalive.Wasthattheimpactofherbloodinme?Did
itmeanIwasmorelikelytobecomelikeher?Orwasittheheartmatebond?Was
thatwhatbecameofthosewholosttheirotherhalves—iftheysimplydidn’tgive
upanddieliketheonesCasteelhadspokenof?
Inthedark,silentmomentsof
thenight,Icouldadmitthatitwaspossible.Icouldbecomejustlikeher.
ButwhatterrifiedmemorewastheknowledgethatIcouldbecomesomethingfar
worse.
Maybethatwaswhatshewanted.
Perhapsthatwaswhatsheplanned,andItrulywastheHarbinger.TheBringer
ofDeathandDestruction.
Andmaybeitwasn’tjust
Isbeth’sbloodline.PerhapsitwasalsotheConsort’s.Shesleptuntilatleast
oneofhersonswasreturnedtoherbecauseofwhatshemightdoifawake.In
thosestrangeglimpsesI’dgottenofher,I’dfeltherrage.Herpain.It’d
feltlikethekindthat…undidthings.
AndwhenIfeltrage,I
tasteddeath.
Squeezingmyeyesshut,Ilifted
myclosedhandtomylips.TheringdugintomyskinasIopenedmymouthand
screamedwithoutsound—yelledinsilenceuntilthecornersofmymouthhurt,my
throatburned,andmyentirebodyshookwiththeforceofit.Iscreameduntil
whateverKieranfeltfrommethroughthenotamhadnotonlyawakened
himbutalsocausedhimtoshiftintohismortalform.Aheavy,warmarm
coveredmine.
Kierandidn’tspeakasheworked
hisotherarmundermystiffshouldersandfoldedhisupperbodyovermine.He
didn’tsayawordasIliftedmyhands,ringandall,tomyface,coveringmy
mouthandeyesashetuckedmyheadunderhischin.Istoppedthesilent
screaming,butIdidn’tcry.Iwantedto.Myeyesached,andsodidmythroat.But
Icouldn’t.IfIdid,Ididn’tthinkI’dstop.Becauseasinkingsortofhorror
settledintome.ThesamesortofforebodingdreadI’dfeltwhenIheardDuke
SilvansaythatIwouldfillthestreetswithblood.
Ididn’tknowhowlongwelay
therebeforeithitme—beforeIrealizedwhatIneededtodo.Then,thetrembling
ceased.Thefireinmythroateased.
Iloweredmyhands,still
holdingontothering.“Ineedyoutopromisemesomething.”
Kieranwassilent,buthisarms
tightenedaroundme,andIfelthisheartbeatingagainstmyback.
“You’renotgoingtolikethis.
Youmayevenhatemealittleforit,”Ibegan.
“Poppy,”hewhispered.
“Butyou’retheonlypersonI
trusttodothis,”Icontinued.“Theonlypersonwhocan.”Itookabreath.“If
I…ifweloseCasteel,ifsomethinghappenstohim—”
“Wewon’t.Thatwillnothappen.”
“Evenifitdoesn’t,Icould
still…losemyself.IfIbecomesomethingcapableofthekindofdevastationwe
sawyesterday—”Iwhispered.
“Youwon’t.Youwon’tbecomelike
that.”
“Youdon’tknowthat.I
don’tknowthat.”
“Poppy.”
“WhatIsaid,aboutfeelingless
mortalwitheachday?Iwasn’tlying,Kieran.There’slikethis…thislineinside
methat,oncecrossed,makesmesomethingelse.I’vedoneitbefore.Atthe
ChambersofNyktos.Icould’vedestroyedSaion’sCove,”Iremindedhim.“I
could’vedestroyedOakAmblerwhenIwoketofindCasteeltaken.Iwantedto.”
“Iwillreachyou.Caswill,”he
reasoned.
“Therewon’talwaysbesomeone
there.”IforcedmygriponCasteel’sringtoloosen.“Theremaybeatimethat
noonewillbeabletoreachme.Andifthathappens,Ineedyou—”
“Fuck.”
“Ineedyoutoputmeintheground.
Casteelwon’tbeabletodoit.Youknowthat.Hecan’t,”Iforgedon.“Ineed
youtostopme.Youknowhow.Therearebonechainsunder—”
“Iknowwherethechainsare.”
Hisangerwashotinmythroatbutnotnearlyasbitterashisanguish.AndIhated
myselfalittlethen.
Ihatedmyselfalot.Butthere
wasnootherchoice.“Andifwehaven’tdiscoveredallEloanadidtoentomb
Malec,youneedtofindout.Putmeinthegroundanddowhatevershedid.
Please.He…Casteelwillbeangrywithyou,buthe’llunderstand.Eventually.”
“Thefuckhewill,”Kieransaid
onagrowl.
“Buthewon’tkillyou.Hewould
neverdothattoyou.”Iswallowedasmythroatconstricted.“I’msorry.Iam.
Idon’twanttoasksomethinglikethat.Idon’twanttoputthatonyou.”
“Butyouare.”Hisvoicehad
turnedhoarse.“That’sexactlywhatyou’redoing.”
“BecauseIcan’tbecomesomething
capableoflevelingcities.Icouldn’tlivewithmyself.Youknowthat.You
couldn’tlivewithallowingmetobecomethat.NeithercouldCasteel.”Ifolded
myhandoverhisarm.“Maybethatwillneverhappen.IwilldoeverythingIcan
tonotletit.Butifitdoes?Youwouldbedoingtherightthing.Youknowthat.
Youwouldbedoingthethingthatneededtobedone.”
Kieran’sholdtightenedeven
further.Hedidn’trespond.Notforalongtime.“Idon’tthinkyougive
yourselfenoughcredit,Poppy.Idon’tthinkyouwillallowitto
happen,”hetoldme,shiftinghisarmsomyhandslippedintohis.Hetangled
hisfingerswithmine.“ButifI’mwrong…”
Iheldmybreath.
“Iwilldoit,”Kieranswore
withanothershudder.“Iwillstopyou.”
Chapter18
“ThepeopleofOakAmblerarewaiting,”Valyntoldus
asweclimbedthetowerofCastleRedrockthefollowingafternoon.“Theyappear
rathercalm,sothat’sgood.”
Iwantedtoagree,butthesobs
ofgrieffromtheparentswe’dmetontheroadtoOakAmblercloggedmythroat.
They’dbeenbroughtintothecityaheadoftheothersandthenledtothe
Temple,wheretheremainshadbeencarefullywrappedinshrouds.AndthenallI
coulddowaswatchastheirhopegavewaytodespair.Aseachoftheirworlds
shattered.Thesoundsthey’dmadeeachtimeonefoundtheirchildonthepyres—the
raw,pain-filledscreamscomingfromthedepthsoftheirshatteredbeings
didn’tevensoundlikesomethingamortalcouldgivevoiceto.
Icouldn’tstopseeing,hearing,
ortastingit.
I’dgiventhestuffedbearback
toRamonandNelly.I’dsaidIwassorry.I’dsaidthatnearlyahundredtimes,
anditmeantnothing.Itdidnothing.I’dpromisedthiswouldneverhappen
again,andI’dmeantthat.Butthatalsodidnothingforthem.
“Everyone’spresent?”Vonettaasked
asweenteredthesmallchamberatthetop.Nailllingeredinthenarrow
doorway,blockingitasifheexpectedsomethingtorushupfromthestairs.
“Asfaraswecantell,”Lord
SvensaidasIwalkedtooneofthesmall,squarewindowsthatfacedtheoaks
alongthebluff.Throughthetrees,Isawglimpsesofthedraken.“Ihaveone
ofmymengoingthroughtherecordsattheCitadeltoseeifwecangeta
betterthanroughestimateofhowmanypeoplelivedhere.”
“Asmallgroupofmortalswasat
theRisethismorning—someofthosewhoremained,”GeneralCyrsaid.“They’ve
expressedadesiretoleavethecity.”
“Thentheyshouldbeableto
leave,”Vonettareplied.
“Agreed,”Emilsaid.
Intheensuingsilence,Kieran
touchedmyshoulder.He’dbeenquietallmorning.Hewasn’tangrybecauseofwhat
I’daskedofhimlastnight.Ididn’tpickupanyofthatfromhim.NordidI
thinkhe’dliedwhenI’daskedhimfivehundredandfivetimessinceIwokeif
hewas.Hewastiredandtroubled
IclearedmythroatasIturned
fromthewindow.SvenandValynlookedatme,waiting.“Theyshouldbeallowed
toleaveifthatiswhattheywant.”
NeitherValynnorCyrappeared
entirelythrilledbythat.
Iswallowedagain,pushingthe
knotfurtherdown.“Ifanyonewantedtoleavetheircitytomoveclosertofamily
orseekbetteropportunities,they’dhavetogainpermissionfromtheRoyals,”
Itoldthem,rememberingtherequeststhathadbeenbroughtbeforetheTeermans
duringtheCityCouncilmeetingsheldweekly.“Itwasrarelyapproved.People
shouldhavethatbasicfreedominSolis,justastheydoinAtlantia.”
“Iagree,butduringatimeof
war?AndwiththeCraven?”LordSvenbegan.“Itmaynotbethebesttimeto
allowthatfreedom.”
“Iunderstandthehesitationto
allowthis.Iwouldrathernoonechoosetoleavebecauseofthedangersthat
choiceincurs.Butifwepreventthat,theyhavenoreasontobelievethatit
wouldbetemporaryorthatwehavenointentionofcontinuingtosuppresstheir
rights.”Ilookedtothedark-hairedgeneral.CyrwouldremaininOakAmblerto
protecttheportandthesurroundinglandswithapartofhisregiment.The
remainderofhisforcewouldbeabsorbedintoValyn’s.“Theyshouldbereminded
oftherisks,butiftheyinsist,thenweallowit.”
Cyrnodded.“Ofcourse.”
“Whatwedoherewillbeheard
inothercities,”Iremindedhim—remindedallofthem.Includingmyself.“This
ishowwegainthetrustofthepeopleofSolis.”
Thegroupnodded,andIlookedto
thedoorwayofthebalcony.Icouldhearthehumfromthecrowdgatheredinthe
courtyardbelowandinthemeadowofRedrock.Myhearttrippedoveritself.
“It’stimeIspeakwiththem.”
“We’llwaitforyououtside.”
Svenbowedandthenmadehiswayoutontothebalcony.CyrandEmilfollowed.
“Yousureyouwanttodothis
now?”Valynasked,havingstayedbehind.
“DoyouthinkIshouldn’t?”
“Ithinkyoushoulddowhatyou
feelyoucan,”hesaidratherdiplomatically.“ButIalsothinkwhatyou’vealready
donetodayismorethanenough.”
Hewasspeakingofthemeeting
withthefamilies.Ipressedtheheelofmypalmagainstthepouch,feelingthe
toyhorse.ValynhadbeentherewhenIspoketothefamilies.SohadKieranand
Vonetta.They’dbornewitnesstothatpainfuldesperation.“Isallofthisnotthe
dutyofaQueen?”
“Itdoesn’thavetobe.There’s
norulethatsaysthat.”Valyn’sresponsewasassoftashisgaze.“There’sno
policythatdictatesyoumustshoulderalltheresponsibility.That’swhyyou
haveanadvisor.”HethennoddedatVonetta.“That’swhyyouhavearegent.”
KieranliftedashoulderwhenI
glancedathim.“He’sright.Anynumberofuscanspeaktothepeople.”
Anyonecould—andprobablydoa
muchbetterjobofitthanme—but…Ilookedbackupatmyfather-in-law.“If
youwerestillKing,wouldyouhaveallowedsomeoneelsetospeaktothose
families?Speaktothepeople?”
Valynopenedhismouth.
“Truly?”Iprodded.
Hesighedashedraggedaheavy
handthroughhishair,shovingitbackfromhisface.“No,Iwould’vedoneit
myself.Iwouldn’thavewantedanyoneelseto—”
“Bearthosemarks?”Imurmured,
andhisheadtiltedinthatway.Thecornersofmylipscurvedup
faintly.“Iappreciatetheoffer.”AndIdidbecauseIthoughtitcamefroma
goodplace.“Butthishastobeme.”
Somethingakintopridesettled
intohisfeatures.“Thenitshallbeyou.”
Idrewinabreath,butit
didn’tgoveryfar.Nervousnessswampedme.“I…I’veneverspokentosucha
largecrowdbefore.”Mypalmsfeltdamp,andIcouldn’thelpbutthinkif
Casteelwerehere,hewould’vetakentheleadonthisuntilIfeltcomfortable.
Notbecausehe’ddoubtthatIcoulddoitorthinkthathewouldbebetterat
it,butbecauseheknewitwassomethingIhadsoverylittleexperiencewith.
IglancedatValyn,whohadwaitedbehind.“I’mnotsurewhatIshouldevensay
tothem.”
“Thetruth,”Valynsuggested.
“Youtellthemwhatyoutolduswhenwearrived.Thatyou’renotaconqueror.
Thatyou’renotheretotake.”
Mychestloosenedalittle,and
Inodded,facingthedoor.
“Penellaphe,”Valyncalled,
stoppingme.“Mysonistrulyluckytohavefoundyou.”
Theknotcamebackbutfora
verydifferentreason.ButwhenItookabreaththistime,itfilledmylungs.
“We’rebothlucky,”Itoldhim,andIsworetheringwarmedagainstmyskin.
Iturnedbacktothedoor,
liftingmyshouldersasVonettaleanedin,speakingquietly.“Yougotthis.”
Reachingdown,Itookherhand
andsqueezedit.“Thankyou.”
Vonettasqueezedback,andthen
Iwentforward,steppingoutintothecoolairandthebrightafternoonsun.My
heartpoundedasIwalkedtowardthestonerailing,followedbytheothers.The
crowdquietedinawavethatextendedbeyondthecourtyard,themeadow,and
farther,intothepackedandcrowdedstreets.MyhandstrembledslightlyasI
placedthemonthestone,everyfiberofmybeingawareofthousandsandthousands
ofgazesturnedupward,seeingmeinthewhiteoftheMaidenandthegold
mantleoftheAtlantians.IworenocrownbecauseIwasnottheirQueen.
AndthenItoldthepeopleofAtlantia
whatIhadtoldthegeneralsinavoicethattrembledbutwasloud.Inavoice
thatwasheard.“Wearenotconquerors.Wearenottakers.Wearehere
toendtheBloodCrownandtheRite.”
Muchlater,afteraddressingthepeopleofOakAmbler
andmeetingwiththegeneralstofirmupplansfortomorrowandbeyond,Ipaced
thelengthofthesittingareaadjoiningthebedchamberI’dsleptinthenight
before.Valynhadjoinedussometimeago,sharingaglassofwhiskeywithKieran.
Minesatuntouchedonthetable.Myheadwastoofullofthoughts,andmy
stomachchurned,eventhoughitwasfull.
“Canyousit?”Kieranaskedfrom
thechairhewasseatedin.
“No.”
“Yourpacingwon’tmaketomorrow
comeanysooner,”hesaid,andleavingtomorrowwasn’tevenoneofthetop
reasonsIwaswearingapathinthestonefloor.ItwasthegriefthatIstill
tastedfromthatmorning.ItwasthetentativehopeIstillfeltfromthe
peopleofOakAmbler.Itwasalsotheirawakeningragethatlingeredintheback
ofmythroat.“Andit’smakingmenervous.”
Istopped,facingthem.
“Really?”
“No.”Kieranliftedhisglassto
hislipsashekickedabootedfootontotheottomaninfrontofhim.“It’sjust
reallydistracting,andIfeellikeifIdrankanymore,yourconstantbackand
forthwouldendupmakingmesick.”
“Whydon’tyoustopdrinking
then?”Isuggested,tonedrippingwithacid.Sugaryamusementradiatedfrom
whereHisastoodatthearchwayofthechamber.
Valynraisedhisbrowsashelifted
hisglass,surelyhidinghisgrinasIdid,infact,plopveryloudlyintothe
chairacrossfromKieran.“Happy?”
“Soundedlikeyoumayhavehurt
yourself,”heobserveddryly.
“It’sabouttosoundlikeyou’re
hurtbecauseI’masecondawayfrompunchingyou,”Iretorted.
Kierangrinned.“Youmean,a
lovetap?”
Myeyesnarrowed.
“So,I’vebeenthinkingabout
whatthatPriestsaid.WhatyoualltoldmeaboutthewomaninMassene,”Valyn
spoke,wiselychangingthesubject.“IftheyreallywerespeakingaboutMalec,
doyouthinkIsbethistheconspirator?”
“Idon’tknow.Idon’tknowif
it’sher,orMalec,orifthisisalljustnonsense,”Isaid,blowingoutan
aggravatedbreath.“Idon’tknowhowanyofthatplaysintowhytheyhad
anotherRite.OrwhyshecreatedtheRevenants,orhowanyofthembelieveI
playaroleinthis.NoneofthemcanseriouslythinkIwillgoalongwithher
plans.”
“Remakingtherealmscouldmean
takingAtlantia,”Valynsurmisedafterafewmoments.“Afterall,that’swhat
we’redoinginaway—bringingthetwokingdomstogether.Thatcouldbewhat
Framontwasspeakingof.”
Itcouldbe,butIfeltasifI
weremissingsomething.
“I’vesentwordbacktoEvaemon.
Ihopetohavearesponsebythetimewe’rereunited,”hesaid,andInodded.“You
stillplantotravelthroughtheBloodForest?”
“Wewillcomeclosetoit,”
Kieransaid.“It’sthesafestway.WewanttogetasclosetoCarsodoniaas
possiblebeforewe’reseen.Wewantthatadvantage.”
Ifwetraveledstraightthrough
NewHavenandWhitebridge,itaddedtotheriskofbeingseen.Soweplannedto
travelupthecoast,skirtingtheedgeoftheBloodForestandthencuttingbetween
ThreeRiversandWhitebridge,makingourwaytotheWillowPlainsthrougha
portionoftheNielValley,wherewewouldthenentertheElysiumPeaks.The
armieswouldbefollowingbehindus,takingthosecitiesunderVonetta’s
leadership.
“Thepathyoutakewon’tbe
withoutdanger,”Valynpointedout.“NewsofoursiegeofOakAmblerwillreach
thecapitalsoon.TheBloodCrownwillmovetheirarmies.Therewillbe
patrols.”
“Weknow,”Kieranstated.
“Nothingaboutwhatwe’reabouttoembarkonissafe.”
Valynshifted,bendinghisleg.
“Ifyourestimatesareright,itwilltakeyouaboutafortnighttoreachCarsodonia.”
“Giveortakeaday,”he
answered.“That’sifwe’reabletopushhard.”
“Bythen,weshouldbeatThree
Rivers,”hecontinued.“Wherewe’llmeetwithyouand—”
“AndCasteel.Hewillbewithme,”
Ipromised.
Hisexhalewasoneofhope.“Ibelieve
that.BecauseIbelieveinyou,”headded,holdingmygaze.“Iwanttomakeyou
apromise.Iwillmakesureyourwishesarecarriedoutonourend.Theregent
willhavenoissuesfromanyofthegenerals.WewillnottakedownanyRises.
Wewillnotbethecauseofinnocentslosingtheirlives.”
Nowmyexhalewashopeful.“Thank
you.”
Henodded.“Whatareyourplans
onceyougetintoCarsodonia?Howwillyoufindhim?”
“We’restillworkingonthat,”
Kieranshared,andIalmostlaughedbecauseworkingonthatcouldeasily
betranslatedinto,wedon’tknow
Thethick,cream-liketasteof
concerngatheredinmythroat,andmygazeshotfromKierantoValyn.Theburst
ofworryhadcomefromhim,andthatwas…well,itwasraretopickupanything
fromtheman.
“It’sbeenalong,longtime
sinceI’veevenbeenclosetoCarsodonia,”hebegan.“Anditwasabigcity
then.That’salotofgroundtosearch.AlotofAscended.AlotofRoyal
Knights.”
“Weknow,”Kieransaid,hisdrink
forgotteninhishand.
“AndthenyouhavetheBlood
Queentodealwith,”Valyncontinued,undaunted.“You’renotgoingtohavefree
roamofthatcity.”
“Weknow,”thewolvenrepeated.
“We’vetalkedaboutcapturingahigh-rankingAscended,andevenHandmaidens,
andgettingthemtotalk.OneofthemwouldhavetoknowwhereCasisbeing
held.”
We’dalsotalkedaboutthefact
thattheHandmaidensrarelystrayedfarfromtheBloodQueen.Andwealso
discussedthatwe’dhavetofindahigh-rankingAscendedwhowascompletelyon
boardwitheverythingtheBloodQueendid,whichalsomeantthey’dprobablybe
moreafraidofdisobeyingtheirQueenthanthethreatofdeath.
Wehadideasregardingwhatto
do,butnothingwecameupwithwasamagicalfixforhowtofindhiminacity
ofmillions—
Magical
Ilaunchedtomyfeet,startling
bothValynandKieran.“Magic.”
“Magic?”Valynrepeated,brows
lifting
“Primalmagic.”Ispuntoward
Hisa.“DoyouknowwhereSvenis?”
“Ibelievehe’svisitingwith
hissoninoneofthechambersdownthehall.”
“Whatareyouthinking?”Kieran
sethisdrinkaside.
“Perrysaidhisfatherknowsa
lotaboutPrimalmagic,remember?”Isaid,relievedwhenunderstanding
flickeredacrosshisfeatures.“Andthatalmostanythingispossiblewithit.
Whywouldn’ttherebesomesortofmagicthatcouldhelpuslocateCasteel?”
AsSvensatinthechairacrossfromhisson,Iwanted
tosmackmyself.HowhadInotthoughtofPrimalmagicuntilnow?
“Irememberreadingaboutold
spellsusedtolocatemissingitems,”SvensaidafterI’dburstintothe
chamberandaskedifheknewofaspellthatcouldbeusedtolocateaperson.
Herubbedatthebeardonhischin.“Letmethinkaboutthisforamoment.
Missingitemslikeacherishedringarevastlydifferentthanaperson.ButI
justneedtothinkforabit.I’vereadalotofbooks.Alotofjournals.And
thoseoldspellswerescatteredthroughoutthem.”
“Yes.”Inodded,pacingonce
more.Butthistime,IwasdoingitbetweenKieranandValyn,who’dfollowedme
tothechamberthatHisahadledusto.“Thinkforaslongasyouneed.”
Svennoddedashecontinued
fiddlingwiththegrowthonhischin.Secondsturnedintominutesasthe
AtlantianLordmurmuredunderhisbreath,eyessquinted.Ihadnoideawhathe
wassaying.
Hissonrose,goingtoaserving
tableandabottleofamberliquid.Pouringaglass,hemovedasifhehadn’t
takenanarrowtotheshoulderthedaybefore.Hebroughtittowherehis
fathersat.“Here.Thisusuallyhelps.”
Svengrinnedashetookthe
short,crystalglass.Heglancedatme,noticingthatI’dstoppedpacing.
“Whiskeywarmsthestomachandthebrain,”hesaid,takingadeepdrinkthat
causedhislipstopullbackoverhisfangs.“Yeah,that’sdefinitelygoingto
dosomewarming.”
Perrychuckledashedropped
backintothechairnexttoDelano.
Iwasn’tsureifwarmingthebrain
wasagoodidea.Istartedtopaceagain,butKierandroppedhishandonmy
shoulder,stoppingme.Shootinghimanarchlook,Ifoldedanarmacrossmy
waistandbeganrockingbackontheheelsofmyboots.
“See,Ikeepthinkingofthe
locationspell,”Svenspoke,andIstoppedrocking.“IrememberitbecauseI
almostuseditoncetofindsomeoldcufflinksImisplaced.Ididn’t,though.”
Heglancedup.“Primalmagicisforbidden.Itcanchangethethreadsoffate
foraperson.NotallPrimalmagicdoes,butsomecan,andyoudon’twantto
messwiththeArae—notevenforapairofcufflinks.Neverdidfindthem.”
Ihadnoproblempotentiallymessing
withtheFates—iftheyactuallyexisted.TheUnseenandtheBloodQueenhad
usedPrimalmagicandhadn’tseemedtoincurtheirwrath.
“Whataboutthatspell,Father?”
Perryaskedwithawinkinmydirection.“Whydoyoukeepthinkingaboutit?
Can’tjustbethecufflinks.”
“It’snot.”Onesideofhismouth
curledup.“It’sthelanguageofthespell.It’soldAtlantian,andthatmeans
thelanguageofthegods.Butitwaswrittensomethinglike…”Hisfingers
stilled.“Tofindwhatwasoncecherished—tolocatewhatisneeded.”
Hisgazeliftedtohisson.“Itdoesn’tspecifythatitonlyreferstoan
object.”
“Asetofcufflinksandaperson
couldbothbecherishedandneeded,”Perryagreed,andIwilledmyselftostay
quiet.ThereseemedtobeaprocesstoSvenrecallingthesethings,andhisson
knewitwell.“Doyourememberwhatthatspellcalledfor?”
Svendidn’tanswerforalong
moment.“Yeah,itwasafairlysimpleone.Onlyafewitemsneeded.Apieceof
parchmenttowriteupon.Thebloodtheitembelongedto—orinourcase,theperson—and
anothercherisheditembelongingtothesameperson.”
“Well,thoseitemswillbeabit
hardtocomeby,”Kieranstated.“Startingwiththefactthatwe’dneedCasto
gethisblood.”
“Notnecessarily,”Svenobjected.
“Theblooddoesn’thavetocomefromhisveins.”
“Itcouldcomefromsomeonewho
hasfedfromhim,”Isaid.
Svennodded.“That,ora
relative—anyrelative.Butyourbloodwillwork.”
Reliefshudderedthroughme,
thoughitwasbrief.
“Butwealsoneedacherished
item,”Delanosaid,leaningforward.
“Poppy?”Kieransuggestedand
thenquicklyadded,“NotthatIthinkyou’reanitemorthatyoubelonginthat
kindofwaytoCas,but—”
“Itwouldhavetobeanactual
item,”Svensteppedin.“Somethingthatbelongstothem.”
“Thejournal?”Perrysuggested.
“Journal?”Valynrepeated.
MyfaceheatedasIquickly
spoke,preventinganyoneelsefromgoingintodetail.“WhileIbelievehe
cherishesthat,it’snottechnicallyhis.Itbelongs—wait.”Unfolding
myarm,Ireachedtowherethepouchwassecuredatmyhip.Myheartstarted
racingasIpulleditfree.“Ihavesomethingofhis.”IswallowedasItugged
openthestringskeepingitclosedandpulledoutthetinywoodenhorse.
“This.”
“Gods,”Valynrasped.“Ihaven’t
seenthatinages.”
Kieranstaredatit.Hehadn’t
knownwhatwasinthepouch.He’dneverasked.Hisvoicewasroughwhenhe
said,“Malikmadethatforhim.He…hemadeoneformeatthesametime.”
“Idon’tknowwhyIpickeditup
whenweleftthepalace.”Iheldthetoyhorsetightly.“Ijustdid.”
“Thatshouldwork,”Svensaid.
“You’llneedtobeinthegeneralvicinityofwhereyouthinkhemaybe.A
building.Theneighborhood.Iknowwedon’tknowwherehe’sbeingheld,butifwe
cannarrowitdown,thisspellshouldhelp.”
Thespellwasn’ttheanswerto
findingCasteel,butitwassomething.Somethingthatwoulddefinitelyhelpif
wecouldnarrowthingsdown.
IfIcouldreachCasteelagain
inourdreams,maybeIcouldgetthatinformation.
Istaredatthehorse,nolonger
entirelyconvincedthattheAraeweren’treal,andunabletostopmyselffrom
wonderingiftheFateshadplayedahandinthis.
Eitherway,Ihadhope,andthat
wassucharemarkable,confusingthing.
Fragile.
Contagious.
Breakable.
But,ultimately,beautiful.
Athroatclearedfromthe
entrance,drawingourattentiontowhereLinnowstoodnexttoHisa.“I’msorry
tointerrupt,YourHighness,butsomeone’sarrivedatthegates,askingto
speakwithyou.Theysaythey’vecomefromAtlantia,butIdonotrecognizeeither
ofthem.”
HisafrownedasIglancedat
Kieran.“Didyougetanynames?”
Heshookhishead.“I’msorry.
Ifanyweregiventheywerenotsharedwithme.”
Curiosityrose.Ihadnoidea
whocouldhavearrivedfromEvaemon.“Wherearetheynow?”
“They’vebeenescortedtoRedrock
andshouldbearrivinganymoment.”
TurningtoSven,Ithankedhim
forhishelpandthenleftthechamber.KieranandDelanofollowedclose,as
didValyn.
“Thisisodd,”Kieranremarked.
“Agreed.”Hisaledthewaywith
Linasweenteredthewidehall.“Icannotthinkofanywhowouldtravelfrom
Atlantiathatweren’talreadywithus.”
Guardsopenedthedoors,andwe
steppedoutintothefadingsunlight.Mygazesweptoverthetentsthathad
beensetupandthepilesofrubblefromthedestroyedinnerwalls,stoppingon
twopeoplewalkingaroundasmallhorse-drawnwagon.Irecognizedthewarm
blondhair,goldenskin,andtheuniquebeautyofGiannaDavenwell.The
appearanceofAlastir’sgreat-niecewasashock.Shewasoneofthefewwolven
whoremainedinEvaemontoguardthecapital,butwhentheonewhowalkedwith
herloweredthehoodofthecloakalltheairwentoutofmylungsatthesight
ofrich,warmbrownskinandthemassoftight,snow-whitecurls.
“Holyshit,”Kieranmuttered.
Myheartstutteredandspedup
asIstumbledawayfromKieran.“Tawny?”
Chapter19
IwasrootedtowhereIstood,andthenTawnysmiled
Andspoke.“Poppy.”
Springingforward,Iwasonly
distantlyawareofKieranreachingforme,butIwasfastwhenIwantedtobe.
Iracedacrossbetweenthe
tents,andIdidn’tstop.Forwhatalmostfeltlikethefirsttimewithher,Ididn’t
hesitatetothinkaboutanything.Ithrewmyarmsaroundherasshedidthe
same,andforseveralmoments,thatwasallIcouldfocuson.Tawnywasinmyarms.
Shewasuprightandtalking.Shewasaliveandhere.Emotionclogged
mythroatasIfistedmyhandinherhair,squeezingmyeyesshutagainstthe
rushoftears.
“Imissedyou,”Isaid,voicethick.
“Imissedyou,too.”Herarmstightened
aroundme.
Isuckedinashakybreath,
becomingawareofseveralthingsallatonce.Kieranwasnear.IfeltDelano
pressingagainstthesideofmylegs,andinadvertently,Tawny’s.Hiswariness
confusedme,asdidKieran’sreaction—hisattempttostopme—butitwashow
Tawnyfeltthatwasofgreaterconcern.Shewasslimmerthanbefore,inher
shouldersandthroughherbody,andshe’dalreadybeenslender.Withaslongas
she’dbeenasleep,thelossofweightwasnosurprise,butitwasherskinthat
shockedmemost.Thecoldnessofitseepedthroughthelong-sleevetunic.
Idrewback,mygazeliftingto
herface.WhateverIwasabouttosayfelltothewayside.“Youreyes,”I
whispered.TheywerepalerthanaRevenant’s,nearlywhitewiththeexception
ofthepupil.
“Myeyes?”Herbrowsshot
up.“Haveyouseentheglowbehindyourpupils?”
“Yes.Minearedifferent,too.
It’sthe—”
“ThePrimalessence,”shesaid,
glancingbehindmetowhereKieranhovered.“Iknowwhatitis.”
“How…?”IlookedtowhereGianna
lingered.Ididn’tthinkthewolvenhadseenmyeyeslikethis.“Didsomeone
tellyouaboutthem?Abouttheessence?”
“Yes,andno.”Tawny’scold,
coldhandssliddownmyarmstoclaspmine.“Andmyeyes?Myhair?Idon’t
reallyknowwhyanyofit’slikethat.I’mguessingtheshadowstone,butIcan
seefine.Ifeelfine.”Herheadtilted,andawhitecurlfellagainsther
browncheek.“IfeelsomuchbetternowthatI’mhere.”SheglanceddownatDelano,
whowatchedherclosely.“Eventhoughhelookslikehewantstoeatme,andnot
inthefunway.”
Ashortlaughburstoutofme.
“Sorry,”Isaid,reachingoutthroughthenotamtolethimknowhehad
nothingtoworryabout.“Thewolvenareveryprotectiveofme.”
“Giannasaidasmuch,”Tawny
said,andthewolvengavemeashort,awkwardwaveIfeltinmybones.
Iglancedovermyshouldertowhere
Kieranstood.Hewasn’tlookingatme.Hisbodywastense.HisfocusonTawny.
Tartwarinessgatheredinthebackofmythroat.Hewasn’ttheonlyonewhostood
close.HisaandValynwererightbehindhim.Uneasewasaheavycloud,and—wait.
Slowly,IturnedbacktoTawny,openingmysensestoher.Ifelt…
Ifeltnothing.
AndIknewTawnywasn’tshielding
fromme.Shewasnevergoodatthat.Heremotionswerealwaysclosetothe
surface,ifnotplainlywrittenacrossherface.MyheartskippedabeatasI
pressedalittleharder,findingnothing,notevenawall.
Itightenedmygriponher
hands.“Idon’tfeelanythingfromyou.”
Hermilky-whiteeyesflickedback
tome,andIdidn’tfeelit,butIsawthepinchofconcernsettlingintothe
finelinesofherbrow.“Idon’tknowwhy.Imean,Ido,but—”Hereyesclosed
briefly.“Noneofthatmattersrightnow.ThereissomethingthatIdoknow.”
Herchestrosewithadeepbreath.“There’ssomethingIneedtotellyouin
private.IthastodowithVikter.”
Blinking,Idrewback.“Vikter?”
Tawnynodded.“Isawhim.”
Privatewasn’texactlyprivate.
TawnyandIhadretreatedtoone
ofthereceivingchambers,andIwasn’tsureifNyktoshimselfwould’vestopped
Kieranfrombeingthere.HesatbesidemewhileDelanoremainedinhiswolven
form,sittingatmyfeet.Giannastoodbehind,appearingtobegenuinelyconcerned
forTawny’swell-being.Tawnyhadn’tprotestedeither’spresence,butshewas
clearlynervous,herkneespressedtightlytogetherasshecontinuouslytwisted
acurlaroundherfinger,ahabitshehadwhenevershewasanxious.
DelanoandKieran’srigidposture
andquietwatchfulnessprobablyhadalottodowiththat.Kieranhadstopped
mebeforeweenteredthechamber,pullingmeaside.He’dspokenlow,butthewords
stillechoedlikethunderasIlookedatTawny.“Shedoesn’tfeelright,”he’d
said.“Allofuscansensethat.”
Andhewasright.
Tawnydidn’tfeel
right,butitwasher.Thehairandeyes,thecoldskin,andmyinabilityto
readherwasn’twhoIremembered,buteverythingelsewasher.Andjustbecause
shedidn’tfeelright,didn’tmeanshewaswrongsomehow.Itjust
meantshehadchanged.
AndI,morethananyone,
understoodthat
“AssoonasIwoke,IknewI
neededtofindyou,”Tawnysaidassheclutchedaglassofwater.“Ithink
everyonethoughtIwasabitoutofit.Willa,Casteel’smother,”shesaid,glancing
atKieran.“Ican’tblamethemforfeelingthatway.Iwasabit—”
“Hysterical?”Giannasupplied
forher.
Tawnycrackedagrin.“Yeah,alittle.
Theydidn’twantmetoleave,butyouknowIcanbeprettyinsistentwhenitcomes
todoingwhatIwant.”
Boy,didIever.
“Anyway,Giannaactuallyvolunteered
totravelwithme,”Tawnyadded.
“Shewasgoingtodoitwithor
withoutsomeone.”Giannasatonthearmofthesettee.“Itwastoodangerousto
makesuchajourneyalone,especiallywhennoonehadanyideawhereyou’dbe.”
“Thankyou,”Isaidtoher,
feelingalittlebadabouthavingthreatenedtofeedhertobarrats.
Giannanodded.
“Howisitthatyouwokeup?”
KieranaskedofTawny.“WasitsomethingWillaorEloanawasabletodo?”
“I…Idon’treallyknow,other
thanIdon’tthinkIwassupposedto—wakeup,thatis.”Tawny’shandtrembled,
sloshingthesteamingliquidinhermug.“Iknowthatdoesn’tmakesense,butI
feltlikeIwasdying.IknewIwasdying,untilIsawVikter.Ithink
eitherheortheFatesdidsomethingtopreventthat.”
“TheFates,”Imurmured,almost
laughing.“YoumeantheArae?You’veneverbelievedinthem.”
“Yeah,well,thathasdefinitely
changed,”sheadmitted,wideninghereyes.
Mybreathsnaggedagain.“How
didyouseeVikter?”
“Isawhiminadreamthatwasn’t
adream.Idon’tknowhowelsetoexplainitotherthanthat.”Tawnytooka
drink“IrememberwhathappenedinOakAmbler—thepainofbeingstabbed.And
thentherewasnothingforalongtimeuntiltherewassomething.Asilverylight.
IthoughtIwasenteringtheValeuntilIsawhim.Vikter.”
Afinetremorranthroughme.
DelanoleanedintomylegsasKieran
asked,“Andhowdoyouknowitwasn’tjustadream?”
“Heconfirmedwhoyouare—that
you’reagod—andIknewthat.Isbethhadletthatslip,butIhadn’tbelieved
her,eventhoughIandid.And,gods,Poppy,I’msosorryforwhathappenedto
him.”
“Yeah,”Ibreathedthroughthat
burn.“Me,too.”
“Whatexactlydoyouknowof
Isbethandherplans?”Kieranjumpedonthat.
“Notmuchotherthanshebelieved
Poppywouldhelpherremaketherealms,”shesaid,andIinhaledsharplyat
hearingthosewordsoncemore.“AndIdidn’tunderstandwhatthatmeant.I
wasn’taroundherthatmuch.Ididn’teventrulyunderstandwhyIwasbeing
summonedtoCarsodoniaotherthantheysaidtheyfearedthatIwouldbetaken,
too,becauseitwasknownhowcloseyouandIwere.Thatdidn’tmakesense,but
onceIgottoWayfairandsawthose…HandmaidensandtheRevenants,”sheadded
withashudder,“nothingabouttheplacefeltokay.AndwhenIsbethtoldmeyou
wereherdaughter,Ithoughtthatshewasn’tinherrightmind,”Tawnysaid
withashakeofherhead.“ButViktertoldmethingsthatIcouldn’thave
known.Likeastoryaboutagodwhohadawakenedlongenoughtopreventyou
frombeingharmedintheSkotosMountains.Hesaidthatyoursuspicionswere
correct.ThatitwasAioswhostoppedyou.Healsotoldmeitwasn’tjust
Nyktoswhogavehisapprovalforyourmarriage.Thatitwashimand
theConsort.”
Iopenedmymouth,butIcouldn’t
findthewords.
“Ialsoapprove.Notthatanyone
asked.”Tawnygavemeaquick,teasinggrinthatwassofamiliar,iteased
somethinginme.Itfadedquickly.“Vikteralsotoldmethathe—thatCasteel
wastaken?”
Theburninmythroatincreased.
“Hewas,butI’mgoingtogethimback—”
“You’regoingtotravelto
Carsodoniaandfreehim,”sheinterrupted,andIblinked.“Iknow.Viktersaid
youwould.”
“Okay.”Itookadeep,shuddering
breath.TherewasnowayTawnycould’veknownallofthat.“WasViktera
spirit?”
“No.”Tawnyshookherhead.
“He’saviktor.”
Ijolted.Somethingaboutthe
wayshesaidthattuggedatamemorythatlingeredjustoutofmyreach.“What
doyoumean?”
“IhopeIcanexplainthiswell
enoughtobeunderstood.”Tawnyblewoutabreath.“Aviktorisborn
withagoal—toguardsomeonetheFatesbelieveisdestinedtobringaboutsome
greatchangeorpurpose.Igottheimpressionthatnotallareawareoftheir
duty,andtheyendupbeingthereforthatpersonanyway—liketheFatesbring
themtogether.Ithinkotherviktorsareawareandareinvolvedinthe
livesoftheonesthey’reprotecting.Oncetheydie,eitherwhilecarryingout
theirpurposeorfromanyothercause,theirsoulsreturntoMountLotho.”
“Where?”Mybrowslifted.
“It’swheretheAraereside,”
sheexplained.“TheirsoulsreturntoMountLotho,wheretheywaittobe
reborn.”
“It’saplacewrittentobein
Iliseeum,”Kierantoldme,butallIcoulddowasstareatTawny.
“AndyousaidVikterwasoneof
these?”WhenTawnynodded,mythoughtsbegantorace.“DoesthatmeanheknewI
wasagodthewholetime?Whathappenedtohim?”
Tawnytippedforward,placing
herglassonthesmalltable.“HowVikterexplainedittomewasthatwhenviktors
arereborn,theyhavenomemoriesoftheirpreviouslivesliketheydo
whentheirsoulsreturntoMountLothowheretheyareoncemoregivenmortal
form.Butsomeviktorsarebasically,um,predestinedtofigureout
whattheyare,andwhotheyaresenttoeitherprotectorlead.LikeLeopold.
Viktorsaidthathefigureditout,andthatwaswhyhesoughtoutCoralena
beforeyouwereevenborn.”
Anothershockrippledthrough
me,oncemoretuggingatastrangefeelinginthebackofmymind.The
sensationthatIsomehowknewthisalready.ButIdidn’t.“So,theyweren’t
togetherbecausetheylovedoneanother?”Iasked.
“Idon’tknow,buttheyhadIan
together.Iantoldmetheywerehisparents,”shesaid.“Thatdoesn’tmeanthey
wereinlove,obviously,buttherewasdefinitelysomethingthere,andIdon’t
thinkthatbeingaviktormeansyoucan’tlove.”
Inoddedslowly.Iknewthat
Vikterhadbeeninlovewithhiswife.Thegriefhe’dfeltwheneverhespokeof
herwasfartoorealtohavenotbeenbirthedfromlove.Andinthatmoment,I
chosetobelievethatCoralenaandLeopold—myparents—didloveoneanother.
“Vikterhadtoknow,though.”
Kieran’seyesmetmine.“HebecameaRoyalGuard—becameyourpersonalguard,and
hemadesureyoucouldprotectyourself.Thatyoucouldfightbetterthanmost
RiseGuards.Besidesallofthat,hisnamecouldn’tbeacoincidence.”
I’dalwaysbelievedthatVikter
hadtrainedmebecauseheknewIneverwantedtobeashelplessasIhadbeen
thenightinLockswood,buthecould’vebeenensuringthatIknewhowtokeep
myselfaliveuntilIAscendedandcompletedtheCulling.
“Ifhedidknowwhathispurpose
was,whydidn’thetellher?”KieranturnedbacktoTawny.“Could’vemadethings
aloteasier.”
“Ifheknew,hecouldn’tbecause
eventhoughviktorsaretheretoprotecttheircharges,theycannot
revealtheirreasons.Therewasalotofthingshecouldn’ttellme,sayingit
hadtodowiththeFatesandbalance,sohewasverycarefulanddeliberatewith
whathesaid,”Tawnysaidwithashrug.“It’sthesamereasonthey’reborn
withoutmemoriesandfromwhatIgathered,evenmortalswhoareboundtodo
someterriblestuffmayalsohaveviktors.Hewould’vebeenunableto
speakthetruth.”
Ididn’tknowhowtofeelabout
thefactthatViktercould’veknownwhoItrulywasorknewthatHawkewas
reallyCasteel.Orthathecameintomylifewithonepurpose:toprotectme.
Someofhislastwordscamebacktomethen,squeezingmyheartintopiecesI’m
sorryfornotprotectingyou.Hisbeliefthathe’dfailedmetookona
wholenewmeaningnow.Ireachedout,runningmyfingersbetweenDelano’searswhen
herestedhisheadonmyknee.“Didhelookwell?Like,didhelookthesame?”
“Helooked…”Tawnydraggedher
gazefromDelano.“HelookedlikeIrememberNotthelasttimewesawhim,but
beforethat.”Tawnysmiled,anditwasonlyalittlesad.“Helookedgood,
Poppy,andhewantedmetotellyouthat,yes,hewasproudofyou.”
Isuckedinashakybreathas
rawemotionrose,cloggingmythroat.Iclosedmyeyes,strugglingtokeepthe
tearsatbay.“Didhetellyouanythingmore?”
“Yes,andno,”sheanswered.
“That’snotreallyhelpful,”
Kieranreplied.
Tawny’sblanchedeyesdriftedto
KieranandthelookshegavehimwasoneI’dseenhergivemanyLordsinWait
inthepast.Onethatsaidshewassizinghimupandwasn’tsureifshewas
impressedornotbywhatshesaw.“No,it’snot.”
“So,Vikterwasabletotellyou
allaboutviktorsandupdateyouonthingsthathavehappenedin
Poppy’slife,buthewasn’tabletosayanythingofimportanceregardingthe
BloodCrown’splans?”
“I’mnotsureifyouwere
listeningoryoujustdidn’tunderstandwhenIsaidthattherewerethingshe
couldn’tsaybecauseofthebalanceandtheFates,”TawnysaidinatoneIalso
recognized.Giannapressedherlipstogethertohidehersmile,whileIdidn’t
evenfightmine.“So,heobviouslycouldn’tspillallthesecrets.”
Kieran’seyesnarrowed.
“Obviously.”
Tawnyliftedherbrowsathim.
“Whatwasheabletosay?”Iasked
beforetheargumentIsensedbrewingcouldreallytakeoff.
“Hetoldmeabouttheprophecy
thegoddessPenellaphespokeabout.”
Frustrationrose,asdiddread.
Iwassodamntiredofthatprophecy.“Iknowwhattheprophecyis.”
“Butdoyouknowwhatthewhole
prophecyis?”Tawnyasked.“Idon’tthinkyoudo.OratleastIdon’tthinkVikter
believedyoudid.”
Again,itwasashocktohear
Vikter’snameandtobegivenproofagainthatTawnyhadspokentohimor
someonewhoknewawholehellofalot.“Whatwereyoutold?”
“Irememberitcompletely.How,
whenInormallycan’trememberwhatIhadforsupperafewhoursafterIeat
it,Ihavenoidea,”shesaid,andhermemorywasnotoriouslysubjective.“‘From
the…fromthedesperationofgoldencrownsandbornofmortalflesh,agreat
primalpowerrisesastheheirtothelandsandseas,totheskiesandallthe
realms.Ashadowintheember,alightintheflame,tobecomeafireinthe
flesh.Whenthestarsfallfromthenight,thegreatmountainscrumbleintothe
seas,andoldbonesraisetheirswordsbesidethegods,thefalseonewillbe
strippedfromgloryuntiltwobornofthesamemisdeeds,bornofthesamegreat
andPrimalpowerinthemortalrealm.’”Shetookadeepbreath.“‘Afirst
daughter,withbloodfulloffire,fatedfortheonce-promisedKing.Andthe
seconddaughter,withbloodfullofashandice,theotherhalfofthefuture
King.Together,theywillremaketherealmsastheyusherintheend.Andsoit
willbeginwiththelastChosenbloodspilled,thegreatconspiratorbirthed
fromthefleshandfireofthePrimalswillawakenastheHarbingerandthe
BringerofDeathandDestructiontothelandsgiftedbythegods.Beware,for
theendwillcomefromthewesttodestroytheeastandlaywastetoallwhich
liesbetween,’”Tawnyfinishedandtwistedapurewhitecurl.“That’sit.”
“Yeah,”Kieranmurmured,
clearinghisthroat.Helookedtome.“Thatismuchlonger.”
Itwas.“Afirstandseconddaughter?
I’vebeencalledtheseconddaughter,butwhoisthefirst?Andinwhat
context?”
“Idon’tknow.I’msorry.”
Tawny’sbrowspinched.“Hecouldn’ttellmewhatitmeant,onlythatyouneeded
tohearit.Hesaidthatyouwouldfigureitout.”
Achokedlaughleftme.“He’s
givingmewaytoomuchcredit,becauseI…”Itrailedoff,mythoughtscentering
ononepartofwhatshe’dsaid.“Wait.Theonce-promisedKing?”
Kierandrewback.“Malik?”
“WhenyouwereinCarsodonia,
didyoueverseeMalik?”Iasked.
Tawnyshookherhead.“No.I
don’tknowaMalik.”
“Ithastobehimifthesecond
daughterpartisaboutme,”Isaid.“CasteelistheKing.”
Kierannodded.“Yeah,butwhat
isthisbloodfullofashandice?”
Ithoughtofthecoldnessinmychest,
minglingwiththeeather.“Idon’tknowwhatthatmeansorhowIwillremake
therealmsandusherintheend,aloneorwithanyone.I’mnotgoingtousherin
anything.”
“Idon’tknoweither,”Tawny
said.“Orwhothefalseoneis.”
Somethingoccurredtome,andI
stiffened.“Yousaidthatviktorswillevenguardthosewhoare
destinedtodosomething—”
“Iknowwhatyou’reaboutto
say,”Kierancutin,andIknewhethoughtofwhatI’daskedhimthenight
before.“You’renotdestinedtodoanythingterrible.”
“He’sright,”Tawnysaid
quickly.“Ididn’tgettheimpressionfromVikterthathebelievedyouwere
destinedtodoanythingevil.”
Inodded,feelingKieran’s
stare.Iclearedmythroat.“Andthatwasallhesaid?”
“No.Therewasonemorething,
buthetoldmeitwasonlyforyoutohearandnooneelse.”Sheglancedat
KieranandthenDelano.“I’msorry.”
AmuscletickedalongKieran’s
jaw.“Idon’tlikethis.”HequicklyglancedatTawny.“Nooffense.”
Sheliftedashoulder.“I
wouldn’tlikeiteither.I’mwaytoonosy.”
Awangrintuggedatmylips.“I
needtohearwhatthisis.Vikterwouldn’thavetoldheranythingthatwould
hurtme.”
“Andifhehad—whichhedidn’t—I
wouldn’trepeatit,”sheaddedandthenpursedherlips.“Unlessitwassomething
sheneededtohear.Likewhenshewasabouttomakeabadlifechoicebynot
goingbacktotheRedPearltofindHawke—er,Casteel.Whoever.Anyway,Idid
tellhertodothat.”
“Oh,mygods,Tawny.”Myhead
snappedtowardher.
Kieran’sheadcocked.“You
weren’tactuallygoingbackto—?”
“Nope.”Igavehimasmall
shove.Giannagrinnedassherose,alongwithDelano.“We’renotgettinginto
anyofthatnow.Sorry.Everyoneout.”
Kieranarchedabrow.“Isthat
anorder?”
“Yes,”Isaid.“Andyouknowit
was.”
“Whatever,”hemutteredashe
rose.“I’llbewaitingoutside.”
“Okay.”
“So,”Tawnydrewouttheword.
“WhyisitthathebehavesasIwouldexpectfromyourhusband?”
Heatcreptintomycheeks.“He’s
theAdvisortotheCrown.”
Tawnystaredatme.
“Andafriend.Aclosefriend—but
notlikethat,”IquicklyaddedasinterestsparkedalongTawny’sfeatures.
“Honestly,Idon’tknowwhatit’slike.It’scomplicated.”
“Iwouldsay,”shemurmured.
“AndIcannotwaittohearallaboutthiscomplicationinexcruciatinglypainful
detail.”
IlaughedandrealizedIwasclose
tocryingbecausethiswasTawny.MyTawny.“I’lltellyoueverything.”
Shenodded.“Butlater?”
“Later.Ihavetoleave
tomorrow,”Itoldher,hatingthatIwould,andwe’dhavelittletimetogether.
Itdidn’tseemfair,butIwasgratefulthatshewasherenow.“Ineedtofree
Casteel.”
“Iunderstand.”Hereyes
searchedmine.“I’mjustgladwereachedyouwhenwedid.”
“Me,too.”Istartedtospeak,
thenstoppedandtriedagain.“DidyoulearnabouttheAscension?Whatreally
happenedtothethird-borns?”
“Idid,”shewhispered.“Ian
toldmeafterIarrivedinWayfair.Youknow,Ididn’twanttobelievehim.I
didn’twanttoadmitthatIboughtintothishorrificlie—thatIwasapartof
it.”
“Butyoudidn’tknow.Noneofus
did.”
“Doesn’tseemtomakeitbetter,
though,doesit?”
Meetinghergaze,Ishookmy
head.“No,itdoesn’t.”
Tawnyscootedforwarduntilher
kneespressedintothecoffeetable.“IthinkIknowwhyyoucan’tsenseanything
fromme.Ithinkit’sbecauseIwasdying,Poppy.WhatevertheAraeorVikter
didcouldonlystoptheprocess.Butlookatme.Myhair.Myeyes.Myskinis
socold.IthinkI’mdeadbut…not.”
Myheartstuttered.“You’renot
dead,Tawny.Youbreathe,right?Eat?Think?Feel?”Whenshenodded,Itooka
deepbreath.“Thenyou’realiveinallthewaysthatmatter.”
“True,”shemurmured.“Butthe
Ascendedcandoallofthosethings.”
“You’renotanAscended.”My
gazesearchedthebeautiful,finelinesofherfeatures.“We’llfigureoutwhat
happenedtoyou.Someonehastoknow.”
“Wewill.”Sheinhaledsharply,
meetingmygaze.“ViktertoldmewhynoonewasallowedtoknowtheConsort’s
name,andwhythosewhodidwerenotallowedtorepeatitinthemortalrealm.”
Mylipsparted.“Okay,Iwasnot
expectingthat.”
Tawnylaughed.“Yeah,me
neither,butViktersaidthathernameispower,andthattospeakitisto
bringthestarsfromtheskiesandtopplethemountainsintothesea.”
Istilledasshebasicallyrepeated
whatReaverhadsaid.
“Butonlywhenspokenbytheone
bornassheandofagreatprimalpower.”
“I’m…I’mnotaPrimal,”Isaid,
stillnotunderstandingwhyorhowtheConsortcouldbesopowerfulthatnoone
daredtoutterhernameinthemortalrealm.
“Idon’tknow.IwishVikter
could’vetoldmemore,buthetoldmethis.”Tawnyleanedinevencloserthen,
overthetable.“Hetoldmeyoualreadyknewhername.”
TheskywasovercastwhenIwalkedoutofCastle
Redrockthefollowingmorning,thetoyhorsesecuredinitspouch,apieceof
parchmentandpenciltuckedwithinasatchel,andthewordsSvenhadsaidI
wouldneedtospeaktocastthePrimalspellcommittedtomemory.Myhairwas
braidedandpinnedbeneathawide-brimmedcap.Wewerealldressedinthebrown
usuallywornbytheHuntsmenofSolis,ourcloaksthatborethecrimsoncrestof
theBloodCrown—acirclewithanarrowpiercingthecenter—takenfromtheRise
Guards.Thecrestwassupposedtorepresentinfinityandpower,butitwasmore
asymboloffearandoppression.
IhatedwearingitasmuchasI
didthewhiteoftheMaiden,buttheHuntsmenwereoneoftheonlygroupswhowere
seenmovingfreelythroughSolis,ferryingmessagesfromcitytocityor
transportinggoods.
Thewolvenpacedrestlessly,their
agitationatnotaccompanyingustartandlemony.Ihatedthatourplansleft
themuneasy,buteveniftheywereallintheirmortalforms,itwouldbetoo
noticeableandtoorisky.
Isbethwouldhavethem
slaughtered.
IturnedtowhereTawnystood
besideme.We’dspenttheremainderofyesterdaytogetherasIcaughtherupon
everythingshehadn’talreadybeentold,andshe’dtalkedtomeaboutwhatit
hadbeenlikewhenshesawVikter.Itremindedmealotofhowithadbeenwhen
ItoohadbeenattheVale’sdoorandhaddreamedoftheConsort.Istillhad
noideawhyVikterwouldthinkIknewtheConsort’sname.
Tawnysmiledatme.“You’regoing
tobecareful.”
“Ofcourse.”
Shetookmyhandsinhers.The
coldnessofherskinseepedthroughmygloves.“Ascarefulasyouwerewhenwe
snuckoutofCastleTeermanandwouldgoswimmingasnakedasthedaywewereborn?”
“Evenmorecarefulthan
that.”Igrinned.“Andyou?IwantyoutostayclosetoVonettaandGianna.”
SheglancedtowhereVonettawaited.
“I’llprobablygetonhernerves.”
“No,youwon’t.”Isqueezedher
hands“Vonettaisverynice.You’llloveher.”
Tawnysteppedin,loweringhervoice.
“Haveyougottenusedtothem?AndIdon’tmeanthatinabadway.I’veseen
Giannashiftaboutadozentimesnow,andotherthanawholelotofnakedness,
Ican’twrapmyheadaroundhowallofthatworks.”
Ilaughed.“YousawVikter—who
diedinfrontofus—andyoucan’twrapyourheadaroundawolven?”
Shepinnedmewithaknowinglook.
“Okay,no,I’mstillsometimes
caughtoffguardbyit.Butwaituntilyouseeadrakendoit.”
Tawny’seyeswidened.“Ican’t
wait.”
She’dyettoseeanyofthedraken,
astheyremainedoutofsight,andReaverwasinhismortalform.Thatwould
changesoon.
“Youshouldbegoing,”shesaid,
herlowerliptrembling.
“Yeah,”Iwhispered,pullingher
inforanembrace.“Thiswon’tbelikebefore.”
“Promise?”
“Yes.”Istartedtopullback
andthenstopped,holdinghertighter.“You’vealwaysbeenagreatfriendto
me,Tawny.Ihopeyouknowthat.IhopeyouknowhowmuchIloveyou.”
“Iknow,”Tawnywhispered.“I’ve
alwaysknown.”
PartingwayswithTawnywas
hard,butIhadto.Kissinghercoolcheek,IpromisedtoseeherinThree
RiversandthenwalkedtowhereVonettawaitedwithEmil.Icaughtsightof
Reaver,wearingblackbreechesandasimpletunicsweaterhe’dapparently
borrowedfromKieran,securinganadditionalhorsetothewagon,whereseveral
cratesofwhiskeyhadbeenplacedinthebackunderacoverthatalsohidasmall
arsenalofweapons.TheliquorhadbeenEmil’sidea.Thewhiskeycouldbeused
asadistractionforthosewhopriedtoocloselyoraskedtoomanyquestions.
“IhatethatI’mnotgoingwith
you.”Vonettaclaspedmyarms.“Youknowthat,right?”
“Ihateit,too,butItrustyou
toleadinmyabsence.”
“Hey,”Emilcried,pressinghis
handtohischest.“I’mstandingrighthere.”
“AsIsaid,Itrustyoutolead
inmyplace,”IrepeatedtoVonettawithasmallgrin.
Emilsighed.“Rude.”
Vonettarolledhereyes.“He’sa
mess.”
“Youlikemykindofmess,”the
Atlantiansaid.
“Iwouldn’tletKieranhear
that,”Iteased,wantingtohugher.AndsinceIwantedthat,Ididitinstead
ofthinkingabouthowmuchIwantedto.“TakecareofTawny,please?”
“Ofcourse.”Vonettareturned
theembracewithouthesitation.Iclosedmyeyes,soakinginthefeelasIdid
withTawny.“IwillseeyouinThreeRivers.”
“Youwill.”
PullingbackandwonderingwhyI
suddenlywantedtocry,IturnedtoEmil,andhegavemeanelaboratebow.
“Really?”
“Really.”Uponrising,hetookmy
handinhisandsteppedintome.Hedippedhishead,pressinghislipstomy
forehead.“GogetourKing,myQueen,”hewhispered.
Mybreathsnaggedthen.I
nodded,steppingbackwhenheletgo.TurningawayasKieranspoketohis
sisterwashard,aswasstoppingtosaygoodbyetoDelano,Naill,andPerry.
Delanogavethebesthugs.AnythingcouldhappenbetweennowandwhenIsaw
theminThreeRivers.Anything
Iwenttomyhorse,pickingup
thereins.HisnamewasWinter.Thesteedwaslargeandwhite,beautiful,but
hewasn’tSetti.Ididn’tthinkitwaswisetobringhimtoCarsodonia.I
glancedattheentrancetoRedrock,relievedtoseeVonettaspeakingwithTawny
andGianna.Tawnywouldbeokay.Theywouldallbeokay.
Kierancameupbehindme,touching
myarm.“Youready?”
“Iam,”Ianswered,liftingmyself
ontothesaddle.Mygazesweptpastthegroup—pastmyfriends—andmadeitsway
tothevalleybelow,wherethestatelymanorssat.AswerodeoutofOakAmbler
andbeyondtheRisenowdrapedwithAtlantianbanners,apartofmehopedI
neverreturned.Thatmightmakemeacoward,butIneverwantedtostepfootin
thecityagain,eventhoughIknewIwouldneverreallyleave.
Apartofmewouldremaininthe
still-smokingashoftheTempleofTheon.Charredandruined.
Chapter20
Casteel
Iopenedmyeyesatthesoundoffizzingwaterandthe
heavy,sweetscentoflilacs.Thick,purpleblossomsclimbedupthewallsand
stretchedacrosstheceiling.Steamroseinthepinpointsofsunlight.Waterchurned
restlesslyamongtheboulders.
Ihadn’trememberedfallingasleep.
I’dbeensharpeningtheboneuntilIgrewtired.Eitherway,Iwasn’tthere
now.Atleast,notmentally.Iwasinthecavern.WhatPoppycalledmycavern.
Butitwasoursnow.Aparadise.
Myheartstartedpoundingfast,shocking
thehelloutofme.Ithadn’tbeatlikethisindays.Shouldbeconcernedabout
that.ItwasawarningIneededtoheed,butIcouldn’t.Notnow.
Twistingatthewaist,Iscanned
theswirlingsurfaceofthewaterandthewispysteam.“Poppy?”Irasped,
forcingadryswallow.
Nothing.
Mydamnstomachstartedthumping
intandemwithmyheart.Wherewasshe?Iturnedagain,swayinginthewarm
waterandthehumidair.WhywasIherewithouther?Itwasalmosttoocruelto
wakeandfindmyselfherealone.Wasthissomenewformofpunishment?
PunishmentforthesinsI’d
committed.TheliesI’dspun.ThelivesI’dforfeited.ThelivesI’dtakenwith
myownhands.I’dalwaysknownthosedeedswouldcomebacktoreapwhatI’d
sown,nomattermyintentions.NomatterhowmuchIwantedtobebetter
Todeservesomeonelike
Poppy—someonesoincrediblystrong,socuriousandintelligentandunbelievably
kind.Someonewhodeservedanotherasequallygoodasher.Thatwasn’t
me.Myeyesclosedasmychestclenched.Thatwouldneverbeme.Iknewthat.
Hadalwaysknownthat.FromthemomentIrealizedwhoIhadundermeattheRed
Pearl.
IknewIwaswhereIhadnoright
tobe.
Someonelikeme—someonecapable
ofkillingthewomanwholovedme—wasn’tworthyofagoddess.It
didn’tmatterthatSheahadbetrayedmeorherkingdom.Decadeslater,andno
matterthereasons,thatshitandallthewhat-ifsstillateatme.Mychin
dropped,andmyeyesopened,mygazefallingtomyhands—handswholeinthis
pieceofparadisebutstillnickedandscarred.TwohandsthathadtakenShea’s
lifeandsomanyothers,itwasawondertheyweren’tforeverstainedbyblood.
ButIwasforeverPoppy’s.
I’dbeencomingforher,but
she’dfoundmeattheRedPearl.I’dbeenplanningontakingher,but
she’dcapturedmeontheRisesurroundingMasadonia.I’dbeenreadytouseher,
butunderthewillow,shehadwrappedmearoundeverysingleoneofherfingers
withouteventrying.I’dbeenpreparedtodoanything,butshe’dbecome
everythingtomewhensheaskedmetostaythenightwhileinNewHaven.
She’dclaimedme.
Andshe’dkeptme,evenafter
knowingwhatIwas,whoIwas,andwhatI’ddone.Shelovedme.
Abetterman,onenotsteepedin
thekindofbloodIwas,would’vewalkedaway.Would’velefthertofindsomeone
good.Deserving.
ButIwasn’tthatkindofman.
“Cas?”
Goodgods,myentirebodyjerked
atthesoundofhervoice.Mydamnbreathactuallyseizedinmylungs.I
couldn’tevenmoveatfirst.Iwassolockedup.Justhervoicedidthat.Her
voice
Controlrushedbackintomybody,
andIspuninthebubblingwater.Isawherthen,andthesightofher…
Shestoodthere,thewaterfrothing
aroundroundedhipsandteasingthesoftdipsandrisesofherbelly.Mylips
tingledwiththememoryoftracingthosefadedclawmarksabovehernavel,and
theneedtodroptomykneesandpayhomagetothemalmostdrovemeunderwater.
Itookinthefaintpinkmarks
streakingacrossherlefttempleandcuttingthroughthearchedbrow—healed
woundsthatwereasbeautifulasthefrecklesdancingacrossthebridgeofher
nose.Scarsthatonlyspoketothestrengthofthedelicatesweepofhercheekbones
andherproudbrow.Andthoseeyes…
Theywerewidesetandlarge,
heavilylashed,andtheyhadbeenstunningbefore,remindingmeofglistening
springgrass.Now,thesilveryglowbehindthepupilsandthethinwisps
streakingthroughthegreenwerestriking.Hereyes…Hell,theywereawindowto
mysoul.
Idrankherin,mylipsparting
onabreaththatneverleftme.Allthatbeautifulred-winehaircascadedover
hershouldersandskimmedthewater.Theheavyswellofherbreastspartedthe
tangledmassofcurlsandwaves,offeringatantalizingglimpseofrosy-pink
skin.Myheartstuttered—actuallyskippedagodsdamnbeatasIcontinued
soakinginthesightofthatstubborn,slightlypointedchinandthosefucking
mind-blowinglipsthatweredewyandripelikesweetberries.Mycockhardened
soquicklyitfinallykickedtheairoutofmylungs.Thoselips…
Theywereatormentinthebest
possibleway.
Neverinmylifehadittakenme
solongtofindmyvoice.“I’vebeenwaitingforyou.”
Thatmouth…thecornerstipped
up,andthesmilethatracedacrossherfaceownedme.
Always.
Andforever.
Poppylurchedforward,andI
pushedthroughthewater.Itswirledinafrenzyaswecutthroughit,reaching
eachotheratthesamemoment.
Itookherinmyarms,andthecontact
ofherwarm,softfleshagainstminenearlystoppedmyheart.Itmight’ve.I
didn’tknow.
Fistingahandinhersilkenhair,
Idroppedmyheadtohersandheldher.Heldhertightlyasshewrappedher
armsaroundmywaist.“MyQueen,”Iwhisperedasthecrownofherheadbrushed
mylips.Iinhaleddeeply,findingahintofjasmine,thescentofher,
underneaththelilac.
“MyKing.”Poppyshuddered,and
Imanagedtofindawaytopressherevenclosertome.
Iclosedmyeyes.“Youshouldn’t
callmethat.”Ikissedherheadagain.“I’llgetanoverinflatedsenseofself-importance.”
Shelaughed.Gods,her
laughdidjustasI’dwarned.Itmademefeelimportant.Powerful.BecauseI
couldmakeherlaughwhenthesoundhadbeensorare.
“Thenyoushouldn’tcallmeyour
Queen,”shesaid.
“Butyouareimportant.”I
forcedmygriponherhairtoloosen.Iranmyfingersthroughthestrands,
marvelingatthefeel.Therealness.“Agoddess.Which,bytheway,justwant
topointout…Iknewit.MaybeIshouldcallyou—”
Shejerkedback,hereyesgoing
wideasshetiltedherheadbackandlookedupatme.“You…youknow?”
Gods,thoseeyes…Thegreenwith
thewispytendrilsofsilverwasenthralling.
“Casteel?”Shepressedahand—a
warmpalmalittlecallusedfromhandlingaswordanddagger—againstmychest.
“Youreyes…”Islippedmyhand
tohercheek.“They’remesmerizing,”Itoldher.“Almostasmuchasthoseplump
little—”
“Casteel.”Hercheeks
blushedaprettyshadeofpink.
Ichuckled,andIwantedtodoit
againwhenIsawhowherlipspartedatthesound.“Yeah,Iknowyou’rea
goddess.”
“How?”Thesoftnessvanished
fromherfeaturesinstantaneously.Herjawhardenedundermypalm.Sodidher
eyes.Theybecamefracturedemeraldjewels.Thetransformationwasshocking…and
reallyhot.“TheBloodQueen.”
“Iknewthemomentshesaid
Malecwasagod.Thatwouldmeanyou’reone,too.”
“Malec’snotmyfather.It’s
Ires,”shesaid.“Malec’stwin.He’sthecavecat—theonewesawinthecage.”
Surpriseblastedthroughme,but
itmadesense.IsbethhadnoideawhereMalecwas.Shehadn’tevenrealized
thathewasstillalive—atleasttechnically.Ishould’vecaughtontothatwhen
IsbethaskedaboutwhereMalecwas.
“She’stakenmyfatherandyou,”
Poppysaid,herthroatworkingonaswallow.“She’staken—”
“Sheisnothingtous,”Isaid,
hatingthepainbuildinginhereyes.“Nothing.”
Shesearchedmyfacecloselyas
herfingerscurledagainstmychest.“Thisisreal,”shewhispered.
Inodded,draggingmythumbover
thejaggedmarkonhercheek.“Heartmates.”
Herlipstrembled.“Ihavesomany
thingsIwanttosay.SomuchIwanttoaskyou.Idon’tknowwheretostart.”
Hereyesbrieflyclosed.“No.Ido.Areyouokay?”
“Yes.”
“Don’tlietome.”
“I’mnot.”Itotallywas.
Shereachedformywrist,andI
knewwhy.Iknewwhatshewantedtosee,andwhatshewouldseewasn’treal.
“Don’t,”Itoldherasshefroze,hereyesdampening.“Areyouokay?”
“Areyouseriouslyaskingme
that?”Disbelieffilledhervoice.“I’mnottheonebeingheldcaptive.”
“No,you’rejusttheoneatwar.”
“Notthesamething.”
“We’llhavetoagreetodisagree
onthat.”
Hereyesnarrowed.“I’mokay,
Casteel,butIgotwhatshesent—”
Furyentrencheditselfdeep
withinmeatthethoughtofwhatshemusthavefelt.“I’mhere.You’rehere.
I’mokay,Poppy.”
Icouldseeit—thestruggle.The
battlethatshewonbecause,ofcourse,shewould.Shewasthatdamnstrong.
Herchinlifted.“I’mcomingfor
you.”
Thosefourwordssetoffa
conflictedflurryofemotions.Anticipation.Dread.Theneedtoreallyhaveher
inmyarmsandhearhervoiceoutsideofthisdream.Toseehersmileandlisten
toherquestions,herbeliefs,hereverything.Itbattledwithagreat
senseofalarm—thatwedidn’tknowexactlywhattheBloodQueenplanned.What
itreallyhadtodowithPoppy.
“We’reclosetoThreeRivers,”
shetoldme.
Holyshit,shewasclose.
“Kieraniswithme,”shesaid,
andmyheart—fuck,itwasbeatingfastagain.“AndIhavethedraken.”Herface
tensed,paling.“Actually,onlyReaveriswithme.ButIalsohavethisPrimal
spell—”
“Wait.What?”Istareddownat
her,mythumbstillingjustbelowherlip.“Thedraken?Youhavethemnow?”
“Yes.Iwasabletosummon
them.”
“Holyshit,”Iwhispered.
“Yeah.”Shedrewouttheword.
“Ithinkyou’lllikeReaver.”Hernosescrunchedinthatadorablewayofhers.
“Ormaybenot.HetriedtobiteKieran.”
Mybrowslifted.“Adrakentried
tobiteKieran?”
Shenodded.
“MyKieran?”
“Yes,butatthispoint,ifReaver
triestobitehimagain,Kieranhasitcoming.Allofitisalongstory,”she
quicklyadded.“We’ve…we’velostsomany—”Herbreathcaught,andmychestached
atthesightofthepaininhereyes.“Draken.Wolven.Soldiers.Welost
Arden.”
Damnit.
Ipressedmylipstoher
forehead.Ardenwasagoodman.Damnit.Andtohearthatdrakenhadalready
fallen?Gods.
Shetookanotherbreathandthen
pulledback.“Canyoutellmeanythingaboutwhereyou’rebeingheld?
Anything?”
“I…”
“What?”Shebitdownonherlower
lip,drawingmyattention.“Areyouabouttoleavemeagain?”
“Ineverleftyou,”Isaidat
once.
Herstaresoftenedassheleaned
intome.Myarmtightenedaroundherlowerback.“Canyoutellmeanything?
Eventhesmallestdetail,Casteel.”
Uncertaintybuilt.“Idon’t
want…”
“What?”
“Idon’twantyouanywherenearCarsodonia,”
Iadmitted.“Idon’twantyouanywherenear—”
“I’mnotafraidofher,”Poppy
cutmeoff.
“Iknow.”Islidmythumbover
herbrow.“You’renotafraidofanyoneoranything.”
“That’snottrue.Snakesscare
me.”
Mylipstwitched.“Andbarrats.”
“Those,too.Buther?Absolutely,
not.I’mcomingforyou,anddon’tyoudarehideinformationfrommeoutof
somechauvinisticneedtoprotectme.”
“Chauvinistic?”Igrinned.“I
wasthinkingitwaslovethatfueledmyneedtoprotectyou.”
“Casteel,”shewarned.
“Ithinkyouwanttostabme.”
“Iwould,butsinceyoulikeit
whenIdo,itdoesn’thavethedesiredeffectI’mgoingfor.”
Ilaughed,andthenmydamn
breathcaughtasshediditagain.Shesoftenedatthesound.Sheyearned
atthesound.Isawitinthesetofhermouthandinhereyes.
Damnit.
“I’munderground.Idon’tknow
whereexactly,butIthink—”IthoughtoftheHandmaiden.“Ithinkit’spartof
atunnelsystem.”
Hernosescrunched.“Remember
theundergroundpathsthatledtoRedrockfromthebluffs?Thereweretunnels
undertheTempleofTheoninOakAmbler,too.Aprettylargenetworkthat
connectedtoCastleRedrockandsomeoftheestates,”shetoldmeandthen
quicklysharedhowshe’ddiscoveredit.“Couldtheybelikethat?”
“Couldbe.”Myjawtightenedat
thefeeloficyfingersbrushingthenapeofmyneck.Aboltofpaniccut
throughme.Idippedmyhead,kissingher.Thetouchofherlips.Thetaste.
Shewasadrug.
“Cas,”shemurmuredagainst
mymouth,andeverythinginmetightened.“Weshouldbetalking.”
“Iknow.Iknow.”Therewere
thingstobediscussed.Importantthings.Iwantedtoknowwhatherdaysand
nightshadbeenlike.HowKieranwas.Iwantedtoknowmoreabouthersiegeof
OakAmbler.Whoshe’dstabbed—because,surely,shehadstabbed
someone.Lotsofsomeones.Iwantedtoknowthatshewasokay.Thatshewasn’t
afraid.Thatshewasn’tpunishingherself.Butshewashere,infrontofme,
andIcouldfeelit,thecoldnesssinkingintomyskin.Itwasjustachill,but
oneofuswaswaking,andIknewhowfastitcouldhappen.
Ikissedheragain.
Therewasnothingsoftaboutit.
Ikissedtofeelher.Toshowherhowmuchshe’dclaimedme.AndwhenIprodded
attheseamofhermouthwiththetipofmytongue,sheopenedforme.Shelet
meinlikealways,anditwasalmostasgoodastherealthing.Almost.
IkisseduntilIfeltthecoldkissatthenapeofmyneck,andthenIlifted
myhead.
Thedazeslowlyclearedfromher
eyesasshelookedupatme,andIsawthemomentsheknew.Sherealizedthat
thiswascomingtoanend.
“No,”shewhispered.
MyheartcrackedasIdroppedmy
foreheadtohers.“I’msorry.”
“It’snotyourfault.”
Ishuddered,knowingwedidn’thave
muchtimeleftandthattherewassomethingIneededtotellher.“Iknowwhat
Isbethis.Ademis.”
“Awhat?”
“Afalsegod.AskKieran.OrReaver.
Thedrakenmustbeold.Hemayknowwhatherweaknessis.Ademisislikeagod…but
not.”
“Okay.”Shenodded.“She’salso
learnedhowtoharnessPrimalenergy—Idon’tknownowifit’sbecauseofwhat
sheisorsomethingMalectoldher.Butbecareful.Thatmagiciswhatkilled
thedraken.”
“I’malwayscareful.”Ipressed
mylipstothetipofhernoseasthechillspreaddownmyspine,andapangof
hungerrippedthroughme.“Twohearts.We’retwohearts.”Ibrushedmylips
overherbrow,closingmyeyes.“Onesoul.We’llfindeachotheragain.We
alwayswill—”
Thedreamfragmented,shattering
nomatterhowhardItriedtokeepittogether—tokeepPoppyinmyarms.I
awokeshiveringinthecoldcell,aloneandstarving
Poppy
“Demis,”Iannounced.Afaint,mistycloudfollowedmy
words.Theairwasn’taschilledasithadbeenalongthecoast.Soon,whenwe
crossedbetweenWhitebridgeandThreeRivers,itwouldbewarmer,butwe
couldn’triskafire.
WeweretooclosetotheBlood
Forest.
Thiswasoursecondnight
campingnearthecursedlands.Sofar,there’dbeennosignofthemistorthe
Craven,butourluckcouldchangeatanysecond.Becauseofthat,werestedin
shifts,andveryfewofussleptdeeply
But,somehow,I’dmanagedto
sleepafterbeingontheroadforsixdays.AfternotreachingCasteelfornine
nights,I’dfinallydriftedoff.ButI’dbeentired.Reallytired.In
awayIthoughthadnothingtodowithourhardpace.Somethingthatconcerned
megreatlyandalsomademethinkabouthowhungryI’dbeenoverthelastday
orso.HowdrymythroathadfeltnomatterhowmuchIdrank.Ididn’twantto
thinkaboutanyofthosethingsrightnowwhilespeakingtothesideofa
wagon.
Therewasnoanswer.
Bitingbackfrustration,I
rappedmyknucklesofftheside.
“What?”camethe
gravellyreply.
“Ijustwokeup,”Isaid,
ploppingdownonthegroundoutsideofthewagon.
“Okay.”ThetarpmuffledReaver’s
voice.“WhatamIsupposedtodowiththat?”
“Shehadadream,”Kieran
explained,havingfollowedme.Heloweredhimselffarmoregracefullyontothe
cold,packedgroundbesideme.“AboutCas.”
“And?”
Kieranshotmealookthat
warnedhewasasecondawayfromtopplingthewagon.Whichwouldbefunnybut
notworththeensuingdrama.
“Hewasabletotellmealittle
bitaboutwherehe’sbeingkept,”ItoldReaver.“He’sundergroundandthinksit’s
somesortoftunnelsystem—possiblysomethinglikewhatwasinOakAmbler.And
hetoldmewhatIsbethis.Ademis.Afalsegod.HetoldmetoaskKieran,but
allhecouldrememberwassomesortofoldwives’tale.”
Therewasagapofsilence,and
IwashalfafraidthatReaverhadgonebacktosleep.“Andwhatisthistale?”
“DoIreallyneedtorepeatit?”
Kieranasked.“Toawagon?Andwhyareyouevensleepinginthere
anyway?Youhaveatentyoucouldhavesetup.”
“Ifindtentstobe…suffocating.”
“Butyoudon’tfeelasif
sleepingunderatarpissuffocating?”
“No.”
Okay.Thatdidn’tmakeanysense
butwasbesidethepoint.“Kieran.”
Hesighed.“Whatever.Therewas
thisoldstorymymotherusedtotellVonettaandmeaboutagirlwhohadfallen
inlovewithanotherwhowasalreadymated.Shebelievedthatshewasfarmoreworthy,
andsosheprayedeveryday.Eventually,agodwhoclaimedtobeAioscameand
promisedtograntherwhatshedesired,solongasshegaveupsomethingin
return—thefirstbornofthefamily.Hereldestbrother.So,shehadtokillhim
orsomething.Andshedid.But,ofcourse,itwasn’tAios.Itwasademiswho
hadtrickedherintokillinghersibling.”
“Evenafterhearingthatforthe
secondtime,itstillmakeslittlesense,”Isaid.“Like,Igetthemessage.
Youcan’tmakesomeoneloveyou,right?Notevenagodcouldorshoulddothat.
Butwhywouldademisdothat?Whymakethewomankillherbrother?”
“Iguessbecausethedemiscan?”
Kieransaidwithashrug.“Noidea.Allofthatwasneverreallyexplained,and
again,Ididn’tthinkanyofitwasrootedintruth.”
Ireachedforthering,finding
thechainbeneaththecollarofmycoat.“Thisfablecouldreallyusesome
fleshingout.”
“Well,I’msurethewriterof
suchastorycaresaboutyouropinion,”aroughvoiceintrudedfromtherecesses
ofthewagon.“Actually,no,theyprobablydon’t.Thedemisarerealbutveryrare,”
Reaversaid.“SorarethatI’veneverseenone.”
“Butwhataretheyexactly?”I
asked.
“Agodwhowasmadeandnot
born.AmortalAscendedbyagodbutnotathird-bornandconsideredChosen.
Thefewwhoexistedwereconsideredfalsegods,”heexplained.
Kieransentmeaquickglance.
“Doyouknowoftheirweaknesses?”
“AsIsaid,Ineverknewany.The
actofAscendingamortalnotChosenwasforbidden,andfewdaredtobreakthat
law.”Therewasanotherpause.“Mostdidn’tsurvivetheAscension,butthose
whodid,forallintentsandpurposes,weregods.Iassumetheirweaknesses
wouldbethesameasanygod’s.”
“Meaningtheycouldonlybe
killedbyanothergodoraPrimalorbyshadowstonethroughtheheadorheart.”
Isatback.“That’sgoodnews.”
“Itis.”Kieran’sgazemetmine.
“WenowknowhowtokillIsbeth.”
Itwasgoodnews,butifIsbeth
wasbasicallyagod,shehadfarmoreyearsofexperiencewhenitcametousing
theeather—and,well,everythingelse.
“Great.Nowyoutwocangochat
elsewhere,andIcangobacktosleep,”Reaversaid.
Kieran’seyesnarrowed.“Why
don’tyoufindsomeplaceelsetosleep?”
“Whydon’tyougofu—?”
“Allright,”IcutinasKieran
emittedalowgrowl.Adullachehadstartedinmyforehead.There’dbeen
headachesonandoffforthelastcoupleofdays,butIwasn’tsureifthisone
wasduetospeakingwithReaverorsomethingelse.“That’sallIneededto
know.”
“Thankthegods.”Reaver’shands
suddenlyappearedabovethewagon.Heshookthemasifhewereinjoyous
prayer.
Itookadeepbreath,rising.
Kieranfollowedaswemadeourwayacrosstheshortdistancetothetentwe’d
shared.Ithoughteverythingover.KnowingthatCasteelbelievedhewasbeing
keptunderCarsodoniaandnotintheminesorsomeotherplacewasinformation
wehadn’thadbefore.AswastheknowledgethatIsbethwasademis—afalsegod
thatcouldbekilledlikeanyothergod.
Istoppedbeforereachingthe
tent.Kieranhadbeenonwatchduty,butIknewIwouldn’tbegoingbackto
sleep.Iturnedtohim.“Icantakeoverfromhere.”
Henoddedabsently,hisgaze
fixedonthestar-strewnsky.“Howwashe?”heasked,havingnotgottena
chancetoaskthatbefore.“HowdidCasteellook?”
“Helookedgood.Perfect,”I
whispered,chestsqueezing.Ihadn’tseenthosenewcutsonhisskinlikeIhad
thefirsttime.Inthisdream,hedidn’tappearthinner.Therewasnoscruffon
hischeeks.HelookedexactlyasIrememberedwhenIlastsawhiminperson,
thirty-ninedaysago.ButIknewitwasafa?ade.Thatparthadn’tbeenrealat
all,andIwasn’tsureifhe’dbeenabletopresenthimselfdifferentlythistime
becausehewasawarethatweweresoulwalking.“Hetoldmehewasokay,”I
said.
Kieransmiled,butIdidn’t
tasterelieffromhim.Becauseheknew,justlikeIdid,thatCasteelcouldn’t
beokay.
Itouchedthering,closingmy
eyes.
“Hell,”Kieranmuttered.“Look.”
Openingmyeyes,Ifollowedhis
gazetotheemptylandbetweentheBloodForestandus,wherethicktrailsofmist
gatheredandswirledacrosstheground.
“Craven.”Ourluckhadchanged.
Ireachedformydagger.
“Forfuck’ssake,”Reavershouted,
tossingthetarpasideasherose…completelynaked.Hejumpedfromthewagon,
landinginacrouch.“Igotthis.”
“Whatdoeshethinkhe’sgoing
todobuck-assna—?”KieranbitoffassparksoflighteruptedalloverReaver,
andheshiftedintohisdrakenform.“Well,okay,he’sgoingtodothat.”
AshrillwailofaCraven
piercedthesilence,andthenafunnelofsilvery-whitefirelitupthenight,
cuttingthroughthedarknessandthegatheringCraven
Casteel
Icywatersplashedovermyhead,sendingapainfulshockwave
throughmeasIjackknifedoffmyside.Eyesflyingopen,Idraggedinair,
evenasmylungslockedfromthecolddrenchingmyskin.
“He’sawakenow,”camethedry
voice.
“Tooklongenough,”asofter,throatier
voicereplied.Itensed,recognizingthatvoice.Theannoyance.
TheBloodQueen.
Feelingthesharpenedbone
behindmyback,Iblinkedawaythecascadingwaterandwaited…andwaitedformy
visiontomakesenseoftheshapesinfrontofme.Topullthemintofocus.
Callumkneltbesideme,abucket
byhisknee.Hisfeatureswerestillblurry,butIcouldseethedisgustinthe
curlofhislip.“He’snotlookingtoowell,YourMajesty.”
Myattentionshiftedtowhowaited
behindhim.TheBloodQueenstoodtallandstraight,thethinmaterialofhermidnight
gownclingingtohernarrowhips.IhadtoblinkagainbecauseIwasalmost
positiveuponfirstglancethatsheworenotop.Iwaswrong.Sortof.The
bodiceofthegownwascleavedintwo,thethickerpanelsofmaterialheldtogether
bysheerlaceonlycoveringthefullestpartsofherbreasts.Disgustfilledmy
gut.
“Hestinks,”Isbethreplied.
“Fuckoff,”Imuttered,righting
myselfenoughandslippingmyrighthandtomyhip,closetothebone.
“Iwouldlovetodojustthat.”
Herheadtilted,andthehairpiledontopglintedadeepauburninthe
firelight.AlmostlikePoppy’s.Almost.“However,it’sbecomehighly
apparentthatyou’verefusedtobatheoreat.”
Eat?Whenhadfoodbeenbrought
in?Isawaplatethen,severalfeetfromme.Therewasahunkofcheeseand
somestalebreadonit.Ihadnoideawhenthathadarrived.
Fromthecloudofmythoughts,
whatPoppyhadtoldmeinthedreambrokefree.Iloosenedmyjaw,wincing.The
sonofabitchached.Mywholefacedid.Teeth.Fangs.Theythrobbedasmygaze
focusedontheQueen.MytimewithPoppyinthecavernwastheonlytimethe
needhadvanished—theonlytimeIfeltlikemyself.
“I’vebeenthinking,”Isaid,
latchingontoamomentofclarity.“AboutwhatIsawinOakAmbler.”
Isbethraisedabrow.
Iforcedapainful,dryswallow.
“Alargegraycatkeptinacage.”
Hernostrilsflaredonasharp
inhale,andshetookastepforward.“Whendidyouseethat?”
“Oh,youknow,”—Ileanedforward
slightly—“whenIwastouringCastleRedrock.”
“Andwasanyoneelsesightseeing
withyou?”
“Maybe.”Iwatchedher.“Whythe
fuckdoyouhaveacatcaged?Isthatoneofyour…pets?”
Herblood-redlipstwistedinto
athinsmile.“Notmyfavorite.Thatwouldbeyou.”
“Honored,”Igrowled,andthe
smiledeepened.“Thecatdidn’tlooklikehewasdoingtoowell.”
“Thecatisfine.”
Theedgesofmyfingersbrushed
thebone.“Butitmustbeold.Ifit’sthesameonePoppyspokeof—theoneshe
sawasachild.”
Isbethwentcompletelystill.
“Sheoncetoldmeshesawit
underWayfairCastle.”
“Penellaphewasacurious
child.”
“Youstillhaveit?”
Herstarefixedonme.“He’s
rightwherehewaswhenPenellaphesawhimallthoseyearsago,”shesaid,and
ittookeverythinginmenottosmileatthesavagerushofsatisfactionIfelt.
“Buthemaybehungry.PerhapsIwillfeedhimthenextfingerItake.”
“Whydon’tyoucometakeitnow?
Notyourgoldenboy.”
Callumfrowned.“Iamnotaboy.”
“OroneofyourHandmaidens,”I
continued,holdingherstare.“Orareyoutooafraid?Tooweak?”
Isbethtippedherheadback,laughing.
“Afraid?Ofyou?Theonlythingaboutyouthatfrightensmeisyourstench.”
“Soyousay,”Imurmured.“ButI
knowthetruth.Everyoneheredoes.Yourcouragecomesfromkeepingthose
strongerthanyouinchains.”
Herlaughterceased.“Youthink
you’restrongerthanme?”
“Fuck,yeah.”Ismiledthen,closing
myhandaroundthebone.“Iam,afterall,mymother’sson.”
Isbethstareddownatmeand
thenshotforward,justlikeIknewshewouldbecausesomethingsneverchanged.
Herfragileegowasoneofthem
Iwrenchedtheboneoutfrom
behindmyback,thrustingitupasherhandclosedaroundmythroat,justabove
theshadowstoneband.
Isbeth’seyeswentwideasher
entirebodyjerked.
“That’sforPoppy’sbrother,”I
bitout.
Slowly,Isbethloweredherchin
andlookeddowntowheretheboneprotrudedfromthecenterofherchest.
Missedhergodsdamnheartbyaninch,ifthat.
Hergazeliftedtomine,theglow
inherdarkeyesbright.“Ouch,”shehissed,shovingmeback.Hard.
Myheadcrackedoffthewall,
thepainexplodingbehindmyeyesinahundredstarbursts.Slidingsideways,I
caughtmyselfbeforeItoppledover.
“Thatwasreallyunnecessary.”
Isbeth’schestroseasshereacheddown,grippingthebone.TheHandmaidenshad
movedin,butshestoppedthem.OnlyCallumremainedwhereheknelt,hiseyes
fixedwithcaptiveinterest.“Allitservedtodoisangerme.”
“Andruinyourgown,”Iadded.
Thepaininmyheadintensifiedthehunger—theneedtofeedandhealwhatever
recentdamagehadbeeninflicted.
Herlipspulledback,revealing
blood-coatedteeth.“That,too.”Shepulledthebonefree,tossingitaside.
“Contrarytowhatyoumaythink,Idon’twanttokillyou,eventhoughitwould
makemefeelvery,veryhappytodosoatthemoment.Ineedyoualive.”
Shecontinuedspeaking,butI
onlycaughtpartsofit.Herheartbeathadspedup.Thescentofherbloodwas
strong.IevenheardthegoldenRev’sheart.Ifeltthesteadythumpofthe
Handmaidens’,whostoodquietlybehindher.
“Heneedsblood,”Callumstated.
Thump.Thump.Thump.
“Heneedsanattitude
adjustment,”sheretorted.
Thump.Whoosh.Thump.
Whoosh.
“Can’targuewiththat.Butlook
athiseyes.They’renearlyblack.”Callumstartedtorise.“Ifhedoesn’tget
somebloodinhimsoon,hewill—”
“Ripyourfuckingthroatout?”I
finishedforhim.“Andshoveyourentrailsdownthegapinghole?”
Callum’slipspursedasheeyed
me.“Thatpaintedalovelypicture.Thankyou.”
“Fuckyou,”Igrowled.
“Well,weknowwhatyourfavorite
wordistoday.”Isbethsighed,wipingatthebloodthatrandownthecenterof
herstomach.“Idon’tknowwhyyou’rebeingsodifficult.I’vegivenyoufood,
cleanwater,a”—sheglancedatwhereadownedCravenlay—“somewhatsafeshelter.
AllI’vetakenfromyouisafinger.Andyet,youstabme.”
Theabsolutefuckeryof
herstatementclearedalittleofthehazeofimpendingbloodlust.
“Meanwhile,mydaughterhas
takenmyportcityfromme,”shecontinued,andmyentirebodytightened.“Ah,
Iseethathasyourattention.Yes.PenellapheseizedOakAmbler,andIhavea
feelingI’mnowafewAscendedshortofwhatIwasbefore.”
Ifeltmylipsstarttocurve
upward.
“Smileallyouwant.”Isbethbent
atthewaist,herheavilylinedeyesshrewd.“DoIlookremotelybotheredby
thenews?”
Ittookamomenttofocus.No,
shedidnot.
“OakAmblerwouldalwaysfall,”
shesaid,hervoicedroppingtoawhisperthatIbarelyheardoverherheart.
“Ithadto.”
Alowrumblingsoundfilledthe
cell,andshestraightenedsuddenly,hercrimsonlipsthinning.Mylipshadpeeledback,andthatsound…itwasme.
“Oh,forgodssake.”Isbeth
snappedherfingers,motioningoneoftheHandmaidensforward.Somethingwasin
herhand.Achalice.“Holdhim.”
Callummovedfast,butIsawhim.
Ilurchedtothesideandtomyfeet,throwingoutmyelbowandmakingcontact
withtheRev’schin,startlingthebitch.Thegoldenboygruntedashestumbled
back.Therewasnotimetorelisheitherofthosethings.Ilaunchedmyselfat
her.Thechaintightenedaroundmythroat,jerkingmybodyback.Ishotforward
again,pastthepointofcaringhowtightthebandaroundmythroatclampeddown.
Pasttheabilitytoregisterthepainfromtheshacklesdiggingintomyankles.
Ipulledhardagainstthechains,stretchingout—
Anarmclampedaroundmychest,
haulingmeback.“Thathurt,”Callummutteredasheslammedhisbootedfoot
intomycalf.Themove,oneIshould’veknownwascoming,tookmydamn
legoutfromunderneathme.
Iwentdown,mykneescracking
offthestonefloorasoneoftheHandmaidensgrippedthechainssecuringmy
armsandtwisted.Sheforcedmyarmstocrossovermychest,pinningthemthere
asfingersdugintomyjaw,yankingmyheadback.
“Getthisoverwith,”Isbeth
ordered.
AnotherHandmaidenbriefly
appearedinmylineofsightasIbuckedagainsttheRev’shold,myfeet
slippingoverthefloorasIthrewmyheadback.Thehissofpainbroughtawild,
chokedlaughtomylipsasCallum’sheadsnappedback.Ipushedmyweightinto
him,slamminghimintothewallasIdraggedtheHandmaidenholdingthechains
forward.
“Gods,”Callumgroaned,shifting
hisholdfrombehindme.“He’sstillstrong.”
“Ofcourse,heis,”Isbethcommented.
“He’softheElementalbloodline.Theyarealwaysstrong.Fighters.Noother
bloodlinewould’vebeenbrave—noridiotic—enoughtostabme.Evenwhenthey’re
merehoursfrombecomingnothingmorethanablood-starvedanimal.AndIbethe
alsohasthebloodofmydaughterinhim.”
Andtheneverythingwasablurof
blackandpainandsomethingearthyandcharred.Offingersdigging
intomyjawandforcingmymouthopen.Someoneshovedachaliceinmyface,
undermynose,andabrief,iron-richscenthitmebeforelandingonmytongue,
fillingmymouth,andpouringdownmythroat.
Ichoked,gaggingonthewarm
thickness,evenaseverycellinmybodyopenedup,becomingrawandscreaming
inneed.
“Imustconfesssomething,my
dearson-in-law.”Isbeth’svoicewasalashofflames.“YouknowwhatInever
wantedtobe?APrimal.Ineverwantedthatweakness.”
Shewascloser.Probablyclose
enoughformetogettoheragain,butthebloodhitmygut,andmyentirebody
spasmed.
“Agodcanbekilledjustlikean
Atlantian.Destroytheheartandthemind.ButaPrimal?Youhavetoweaken
themfirst.AnddoyouknowhowyouweakenaPrimal?It’srathercruel.Love.
Lovecanbeweaponized,weakeningaPrimalandbecomingthebladethatendstheir
existence.”Asoftlaughechoedaroundme.Throughme.“Iwonderhowmuchyou
evenknowaboutPrimals.Imustadmit,Iknewverylittlemyself.Ifitweren’t
formyMalec,Ineverwould’velearnedthetruth.Ineverwould’veknownthata
Primalcouldbeborntothemortalrealm.”
APrimalborntothemortalrealm?
“WhenthegodsyouknownowAscended
toruleoverIliseeumandthemortalrealm,forcingmostofthePrimalsinto
theirgloriouseternities,itcreatedarippleeffectthatcaughttheeyesand
earsoftheFates.Theymadesurethatasparkwasleft—achanceforrebirthof
thegreatestpowers.AnemberofPrimallifethatcouldonlyigniteinthe
femalelineageofthePrimalofLife.”
Myheadjerkedup,andIsaw
Isbethinsudden,sharpclarity.Whatshewassaying,suggesting…
Shehadn’tgivenbirthtoagod.She’dbirtheda—
Musclestightenedtopainful
rigidityasthebloodthenkissedmyveins.Itwaslikesomethingonthevergeof
catchingfire,butitlitupmysenses,pullingmebackinchbyinchfromthe
brink—
Thechalicedisappeared,anda
raggedgroanofpainpunchedoutofmeasmythroatworkedtoswallowmore,but
therewasnothingelse.Thatwasit.
Butitwasn’tenough.
Itwasn’tnearlyenough.
Isbethhaddriftedevencloser,
thefeelofherstarelikerustednailsagainstmyflesh.“Thecolorisalready
returningtohisskin.Thiswilldo.Fornow.”
Ilookedforher,onlytorealize
myeyeshadclosed.Forcingthemtoopen,Iliftedthemtoher.
Shesmiled,anditwasatearto
thechestbecauseitwasasmallcurveofthelips.Analmostbashful,innocent
smile,thesameasI’dseenonPoppy.
Theacheinmystomachexploded
onceagain,moreintensethanbefore.Whatlittlebloodtrickledthroughmy
veinsonlytookawaythenumbness.Thatwasall.Anditwasnoreprieve.
Sheknewthat.Sheknewexactly
whatthatsmalltasteofbloodwoulddo.
Myhandburned.Mylegs.The
numerouscutsstungasifI’dbeenswarmedbyhornets.Andthehunger…itramped
upuntilitswelled.
Ilaunchedoffthefloor,pulling
atthechainsasthegrowlvibratingfrommychestrumbledintoahowl.Istarted
tocomeapartattheseams,shatteringintopiecesthatwerenolongergrounded
inanysenseofself.
Hunger.
ThatwasallIwas.
Hunger
Chapter21
Poppy
Unabletosleepthefollowingnight,Isatontheboulder
outsideofthetent,feetdanglingabovethegroundasIwatchedthelimbsof
thebloodtreesswayinthedistance.Nightbirdscalledfromthesmatteringof
oaktreeswe’dhiddenourlittleclusteroftentsandwagonunder.Justinside
thetent,Kierandozedinhismortalform.Ihadbeenrelievedtoseethatwhen
Ilookedinonhimalittlebitago.Hedidn’tneedtolosesleepsimply
becausemymindwouldn’tshutdown.
Iwasrestless.
Hungryagain.
Andthirsty.
Mygazecreptacrossthelandscape.
TheBloodForestwasoddlybeautiful,especiallyatdawnanddusk,whenthe
skiesgavewaytopalershadesofbluesandpinks.Itwasvast.Ididn’tthink
manypeoplerealizedjusthowlargeitwas,encompassingthedistancebetweenMasadonia
andtheoutskirtsofCarsodonia.Basically,itwasthelengthoftheNiel
Valley,andMalecwasentombedsomewhereinthere.
Hopefully.
Theforestwasbeginningtothin
out,though.Throughthetrees,Icaughttinyglimpsesofthehorizon.Andbeyond
that,thecapital.
WhereCasteelwaited.
FortydayshadpassedsinceI’d
lastseenhiminperson.Feltsomuchlongerthanthat,eachdayaweek.At
leastIshouldbegratefulthatmymonthlymenstruationhadendedwhileinOak
AmblerandIwasn’tdealingwiththatouthereinthewoods.
Thiswouldbeourlastnight
campingoutsidetheBloodForest.Tomorrow,wewouldreachtheWesternPass.
Then,wewereroughlyatwo-dayridetowheretheElysiumPeaksbeganinthe
WillowPlains.AccordingtoKieran,itwouldonlytakeaboutaday—maybetwo—to
travelthroughthePeaksandreachtheotherportionoftheminesthat
connectedtotheRise.Myheartlurchedwithadartofanticipation.
Butfromhere,ifwekept
travelingsouthwest,we’dreachtheNielValleyinadayandthentheriseof
Carsodoniainadayandahalf.Fromhere,wewerenomorethantwodaysfrom
beinginthesamecityasCasteel.Notfour.
Wecouldn’tkeepgoingstraight,
though.Therewouldbenowaytogetpastthegates.Wehadabetterchanceif
wetooktheextradays.
Then,wewouldbeinCarsodonia,
and—
Asuddenchilleruptedalongthe
napeofmyneck,sendingarushofgoosebumpsacrossmyskin.Itwasn’tjust
thecoldair.Moreliketheheavypressofawareness.ThePrimal
essencethrobbedinmychest.
Islidforward,loweringmyfeet
totheground.ScanningtheBloodForestforanyhintofthemist,Ireached
formywolvendaggerandsliditfree.Isteppedforward,myfootfallssilent
asIsearchedandsearched.Therewasnomist,noshrillshrieksoftheCraven
shatteringthesilence,butthatfeelingwasstillthere,pressingdownonthe
backofmyneck.
Wait.
Itwascompletelysilent.The
treesthathadbeenswayingmomentsbeforehadstilled.Ilookedupatthe
elms.Nonightbirdssang.Everythingwasstill.Butthatsensation,thatheavyawareness,
prevailed.Akissofcoldnessbrushedthenapeofmyneck.Ireachedbehindme,
foldingmyhandovermyskin.Itfeltasifahundredeyeswereuponme.
Turningslowly,Iscannedthe
thickshadowsbetweenthetreesandbeyond,stillseeingnothing.Another
shivereruptedovermyfleshasIwenttoWinter’ssidewherehisheadhadrisen
fromitsdroop.Hisearswereperked,nostrilsflaringasifhe,too,sensed
something.
“It’sokay,boy.”Irubbedthe
sideofhisneck.
Abreezesweptin,rattlingthe
leavesaboveandtakingwithitthatoppressivefeelingofnotonly
beingwatchedbutalsonotbeingalone.ThesamefeelingIoftenfelt
inMasseneandthePinelands.Thesensationliftedfrommyshoulders.Theicy
touchonmynapefaded.Ashort,tentativetrillechoedfromabirdand,after
amoment,wasanswered.Soundreturned.
Lifereturned.
Uneasy,Imovedclosertothetent,
keepingmyeyesonthereddish-blackleavesofthebloodtrees.Minutesticked
bywithoutmorestrangeoccurrences.Ifithadn’tbeenforthehorse’s
reaction,Imighthavethoughtitwasmyimagination.
Nottoolongafter,Reaverrose
fromhiswagontotakeoverwatchfortheremainderofthenight.I’dtriedto
tellhimthathecouldsleep,buthesimplypointedinthedirectionofmytent
andthenturnedaway.
Iwentbutdidn’tenter.Instead
ofdoingwhatIshouldbedoing,whichwassleeping,Istartedpacingagain.My
mindstillwouldn’tshutdown,andIwasreallyhungry
AndIknewwhatthatmeant.
Ineededtofeed.
Gods.
Closingmyeyes,Itippedmy
headback.Mybodywastellingme,eventhoughI’dneverexperiencedsuch
hungerbefore.AndIknewthatifIwaited,itwouldonlyworsen.Iwould
weaken.AndifIwentpastthat?IrememberedwhatthathaddonetoCasteel.
Andwhilehehadn’tfallenoffthatledge,IwouldbeofnohelptoanyoneifI
fellintoanysortofbloodlust.IknewIcouldn’tdelaythis.
Igroaned.
ButIalsofeltaboutseven
differentkindsofawkward.Sure,Kieranhadofferedhimself,anditwasn’t
becauseIfeltthatfeedingfromhimwouldbewrongoruncomfortable.Itwas
justthat,well,theexperiencesIhadwithfeeding—thosethatIactually
remembered—involved…otherthings.
ThingsIonlyfeltforCasteel—with
Casteel.
WhatifKieran’sbloodelicited
thesamereactionsasCasteel’s—whichwasnothingshortofanaphrodisiac?No,
Itoldmyself.ThatwastheeffectofAtlantianblood.Casteelhadnever
mentionedthatwolvenbloodhadthesameeffect.
Mychinsnappeddownas
somethingoccurredtome.DidCasteelhavethatsamekindofvisceralreaction
whenhefedfromotherAtlantians?LikeNaill?Emil?
Iwasreallycuriousabout
that—forresearchpurposes.
Fiddlingwithhisring,Ibrought
ittomylips.Feedinghadtobeintense,nomatterwhat.ButwhatifIdidn’t
likethetasteofKieran’sblood?Iwouldn’twanttooffendhim—
“Whatareyoudoing?”
Iswallowedasqueakofsurprise
asIspunatthesoundofKieran’svoice,thenloweredthering.Themutedglow
ofthegaslampcastsoftshadowsacrosshisfaceashebentatthewaist,
barefootintheentryway.Onearmwasoutstretched,holdingthecurtainofthe
canopyback.“Whatareyoudoing?”Iasked.
“Watchingyoupaceforthelast
thirtyminutes—”
“Ithasnotbeenthirty
minutes.”Iletgoofthering,lettingitfallagainstthelapelofmycoat.
“Yourinabilitytorealizehow
muchtimehaspassedisalittleconcerning.”Hemovedaside.“Youneedtobe
restingIneedtoberesting.”
“Nooneisstoppingyou,”I
muttered,knowingdamnwellthatitwasIwhowasstoppinghim.IfIslept,he
did.IfIwasawake,sowashe.WhichmeantIhadtobeatleastthreetimesmore
annoyingthanusual.Becauseofthat,Istomped—loudlyandheavily—forwardand
dippedunderhisarm,enteringthetent.
“Thisshouldbeafunnight,”
Kieranmuttered.
Hehasnoidea,Ithought
asIshruggedoffmycoat,lettingitfallwhereveritlanded,andthenallbut
threwmyselfdownonthebedroll.
Kieranstaredashelettheflap
ofthetentfallshut.Heslowlyapproachedme,havingtowalkhalfbentover.
“What’sup?”
“Nothing.”
“Let’strythatagain.”Kieran
satcross-leggedbesidethebedroll,utterlyunbotheredbythecold,packed
earth.“I’mgoingtoaskyouwhat’sup—”
“Whichyoualreadydid.”
“—andyou’regoingtoanswer
honestly.”Amomentlater,Ifelthimtugonmybraid.“Right?”
“Right.”Iturnedmyheadtoward
him,feelingwarmthcreepintomycheeksandmystomachflipoverandoverasI
focusedonthecollarofhistunic.“I’mhungry.”
“Icangetyou—”Kieran’sjaw
loosened.“Oh.”
“Yeah,”Iwhispered,liftingmy
gazetohis.“IthinkIneedtofeed.”
Kieranstareddownatme.“So,
that’swhyyouflungyourselfontotheground?”
Myeyesnarrowed.“Ididn’tfling
myselfontotheground.Ifloppedontothisbedroll.But,yes.That’swhy.”
Hislipstwitched.
Inarrowedmyeyesevenfurther.
“Don’tlaugh.”
“Okay.”
“Orsmile.”
Onesideofhislipstippedup.
“Poppy,you’rebeing—”
“Ridiculous.”Isatupso
suddenlythatKieranjerkedback.“Iknow.”
“Iwasgoingtosaycute,”he
replied.
Irolledmyeyes.“There’s
nothingcuteaboutneedingtodrinkmyfriend’sblood.Someonewhoalsohappens
tobemyadvisorandmyhusband’sbestfriend.It’sawkward.”
Achokedlaughlefthim,andI
reachedovertopunchhisarmlikethematureadultIwas.Hecaughtmyhand.
“There’snothingawkwardaboutthis,otherthanyoufloppingaround.”
“Wow,”Imuttered,tastinghis
sugaryamusementinthebackofmythroat.
Hiswintryeyesglimmeredashe
leanedin,loweringhischin.“Whatyouneedisnatural.Itmaynotfeelthat
wayrightnowbecauseit’snewtoyou,whileI’vebeenaroundAtlantiansmy
wholelife.There’snothingawkwardorbadaboutit.”Hisgazesearchedmine.
“I’mactuallyproudofyou.”
“Forwhat?”
“Fortellingmethatyouthink
youneedtofeed,”hesaid.“Ihonestlydidn’tthinkyouwould.Figuredyou
wouldwaituntilitgottothepointwhereyouwereweakenedorworse.”
“Well,thanks,”Isaid.“Ithink.”
“It’sacompliment.”Heslidhis
fingersfrommywristtomyhand.“Youknow,Iwishyouhadthismuchtrouble
askingmetoentombyou.”
“Ididn’twanttoaskthatof
you.But—”
“Iknow,”hesaidwithasigh.
“You’vefedfromCas,right?OtherthanwhenyouAscended?”
Inoddedasmygazedroppedto
ourjoinedhands.HishandwasthesamesizeasCasteel’s,theskinonlyafew
shadesdarker.“OntheshiptoOakAmbler,”Itoldhim.“Ididn’tfeellikeI
donow—beinghungry,throatdryormyheadhurting—whichI’mnotevensurehas
anythingtodowiththat.”
“Caswouldgetheadachessometimes.
Usually,beforehegothungry.”
Well,thatexplainedthatthen.
“Hehadmefeedjustincase.I’mluckythathedidbecauseIprobablywould’ve
neededtofeedsooner.”
“Youhaveusedtheeatheralot,
especiallypracticingwithitwhilewewereinPompay.”Kieransqueezedmy
hand.“Iimaginewithoutthetraining,youprobablycould’vegonelonger.”
“IknowthatCasteelcouldgo
longerthanamonthwithoutfeedingifhewasn’twounded,waseatingwell,
and—”Isuckedinashakybreath.“Doyouthinkhe’sbeenallowedtofeed?”
Kieran’seyesmetandheldmine.
“Hewasthefirsttime.”
“Butthefirsttime,theykept
himstarving.Tothepointwherehekilledwhenhefed.Webothknowthat.We
bothknowwhatitdidtohim.”Iclosedmyeyesagainstthesurgeofpain.“The
firsttimeIdreamtofhim—hewasthinner.Therewerethesecutsalloverhim.
Ididn’tseehimlikethatthistime,butIthink…Ithinkhewasabletochange
thewayheappearedbecauseheknewweweresoulwalkinganddidn’twantmeto
worry.”
“Hefedontheship,right?”
Inodded.
“Then,worst-casescenario,it’s
beenfortydayssincehelastfed,”Kieransaid.
Myheadjerkedup.“You’vebeen
counting.”
“Haven’tyou?”
“Yes,”Iwhispered.
Hesmiled,butItastedthetangy,
bittersorrow.“Weknowhe’sbeeninjured,butwe’reclose.We’realmostthere.
He’llbeokay.We’llmakesureofit.”
Isqueezedhishand.
“Iknowyouwouldratherfeed
fromCas,andIwishhewashere.Foramultitudeofreasons,Poppy.Buthe’s
not,andyouneedtofeed.”Heliftedhisotherhand,claspingthesideofmy
cheek.Hisskinwaswarm.“NotjustforCas.Hewillneedyouwhenwefreehim,
ofcourse,butmoreimportantly,foryourself.So,let’sdothis.”Hedropped
hishandfrommycheek.“Okay?”
“Okay.”Icoulddothiswithout
makingthingsawkward.IwasaQueen.Istraightenedmyspine.Iwasagod.My
shoulderssquared.Icoulddothiswithoutmakingitweird.
OrweirderthanI’dalreadymade
it.
Kieranstillheldmyhandashe
reachedforadaggerthatlayinapileofweapons.Hepickedupaslender
steelonethathenormallyworeinsidehisboot.
“Feedingscangetintense,”he
remindedme,drawingmygazetohis.“Whateveryoufeelordon’tfeelduring
thisdoesn’tmatter.Whatdoesisthatyouknowthatthis—allofit—isnatural.
There’snoshamehere.Nojudgment.Iknowthat.Casknowsthat.Youneedto
knowthat,Poppy.”
Allofthiswasnewtome.
Everythingwas,butIdidknowIneverhadanythingtobeashamedofwhenit
cametoCasteelorKieran.Tightnesseasedinmylowerback,andtheninmy
chestwhereIhadn’tevenrealizedtensionhadsettled.Lettingoutalong,
slowbreath,Inodded.
“You’resafehere.”
AndIknewthat,too.
Kieranturnedourhandsover.My
stomachgavealittleflipasheplacedtheedgeofthebladeagainstthe
insideofhiswrist.Apartofmecouldn’tbelievewhatIwaswitnessing—that
thiswasmylifenow.Andanotherbitwasstillthepersonfromsixmonthsago,
whoneverwould’veevenconsideredtheactofdrinkingbloodandwhoprobably
would’vevomitedalittleinhermouthatthethoughtoffeeding.
Butthatothermefromthepast
didn’tstopwhoIwastodayorfromdoingwhatIneededtodo.
Iwasn’tusedtofeeding.I
wasn’tusedtobeingaQueenoragod.Iwasn’tevenusedtobeingableto
freelymakedecisionsformyself,letaloneforotherpeople.TherewasalotI
stillhadtogetusedto,andlikewitheverythingelse,therehadn’tbeena
lotoftimetocometotermswithit.
Ijusthadtodoit.
Kierandidn’tmoveashepressed
thebladeintohisskin,bloodwellingashemadeashort,quickcutalonghis
wrist.Iflinched.Icouldn’thelpit.IkindofwishedIhadfangsnow.Abite
hadtobefarlesspainful.Thenagain,sinceIhadnoideawhatIwasdoing,a
bitefrommewouldprobablybeworse.
Butthattwo-inchslicereminded
meofwhatI’dseenonCasteel,andIwishedIhadn’tthoughtofthateither
Stillholdingmyhand,Kieranlifted
hiswrist.Myhearthadstartedpoundingatsomepoint.When,Iwasn’tsure.
Thescentofhisbloodreachedme,andtherewasnoheavy,ironsmell.No,
Kieran’sbloodsmelledofthewoods—earthyandrich,justlikehisimprint.
Ididn’tknowwhattoexpect.My
mouthtostartwatering?Mystomachtogrowl?Neitherofthosethingshappened.
Whatdidwas…ordinary.ThatwastheonlywayIcoulddescribeit.Like
anewinstinctgentlywakingwithoutalarm,quietingtheconcerns.Ancientknowledge
tookhold,guidingme.Iloweredmyhead.
Tentatively,mylipsandthen
thetipofmytonguemetthewarmblood,anditwasajolt—arushalmostas
powerfulaswhenItastedCasteel.ButKieran’sbloodtastedlikehis
imprint—likebreathinginearthy,woodsyair.Themomenthisbloodreachedthe
backofmythroat,theunrelentingdrynesseased,andmychestwarmed,reminding
meofthefirstswallowofwhiskey.Thatwarmthbeatbackthecoldness
there—thechillIfearedhadverylittletodowithneedingtofeed.
Myeyesdriftedshut.Thethick
warmthslidlower,hittingmybellyastheurgetoclampdownonhisskinand
reallyfeedhitmehard.Ijerkedasasharpswirloftinglesdartedthroughmy
veinsandthenhitmyskin.Itwaslike…likesensationwasreturningtomyskin
whenIhadn’tevenrealizedithadvanished.
“Youneedtodrink.”Kieran’s
handtightenedonmine.“Notsip.Andthat’swhatyou’redoing.You’re
sipping.”
Hewasright,whichwas
annoying,butIgaveintothaturge,closedmymoutharoundthewoundanddrank,
pullinghisbloodintome.Thatwasanotherjolt—abrighteronethatwas
powerfulinitsownway.DifferentfromCasteel’sbutstillrattling.Andit
camewiththestrangestarrayofcolorsthatmovedbehindmyeyelids—greensand
bluesthatswirledandwhirled.TensioninmyarmsandlegsfadedasI
swallowed.Histastewasearthyandraw.Wild.Idrankdeeper.His
blood—
Animagecametomesuddenly,
birthedofthechurningcolors.Twoyoungmen.Shirtlessandwiththeirpants
rolleduptotheirkneesastheywadedthroughmurkywater.Laughing.
Theywerelaughingastheybent,dippingtheirhandsintothewaterasthey
grabbedforfish.Eventhoughtheirframeswereleaner,andtheirskinwasn’t
yetmarkedbytheirlives,IknewatoncethatitwasCasteelandKieran.A
memoryofthemasyoungmen—perhapsrightbeforeCasteel’sCullingorjust
after.
Casteeljerkedupright
suddenly,asquirmingfishbetweenhishands.“Thoughtyouwereanexpert
hunter,”hetaunted.
Kieranlaughed,shovinghim,
andsomehow,theybothwentdowninthewaterandthefishswamfree.
Theimagecrumbledandfadedlike
smoke.Icaughtbriefflashesofotherimages,thepicturescominginandout
tooquicklyformetomakesenseofthem,nomatterhowhardItried.Andthen
Isawfire.
Abonfire.
Thenightsky,fulloftwinkling
stars,heady,intoxicatingmusic,andchurning,twistingshadows.Thebeach—the
oneatSaion’sCove.Ilatchedontothememory.Drivenbycuriosity,Iopened
mysenseswider,followingthedancingstarsandsmokeuntilIsaw…me
Isawmeonthebeach,wearingthat
stunningcobaltbluegownthatalmostmademefeelasbeautifulasIdidwhen
Casteellookedatmeinthatway—theonethatcarriedtheheatandweightof
hislove.AndIwasinCasteel’sarms,leaningagainsthischest.
Mypulsepounded,andinthedistant
recessesofmymind,IknewIshouldclosedownmysenses,findawayoutof
Kieran’smemory.ButIcouldn’t.
I…Ididn’twanttoasIwatched
Casteellowerhisheadtomyneckandsawhishandunderthewispyfoldsofthe
gown,hisfingersslidingbetweenmythighs.MybreathcaughtasIsawmyself
respondingtohistouch,movingmyhipsintightcircles.Theimageofuswas
asdecadentasitwasscandalous—lushandwantonandfree
Everythinghadfeltfree
onthatbeach.
AndKieran…hehadn’tjustseen
mewatchinghimandLyra.He’dwatched.Thespicinessofarousal
filledmythroat.Myveins.Mystomachtumbledinawaythatremindedmeof
standingtooclosetotheedgeofasheercliffbecausethatwasn’ttheonlything
Isaw…orfeltinKieran’smemory.IsawCasteelnippingattheskinof
mythroatandliftinghisgazeashepressedhislipstheretosootheawaythe
sting.He’dwatched,too,andthatthrobbinginmypulsehitmychest,my
stomach,and—
“Sonosy,”Kieranmurmured.
Losingmyholdonthememory,my
eyesflewopen,andIpeekedupatKieran.Hiseyeswereclosed,thelinesof
hisfacerelaxed.Hisfulllipswerepartedinaslight,barely-theregrin.
“Should’veknownyou’dbenosy,”
hecontinued,buthedidn’tsoundmad.Hesoundedamused,andasifhe’djust
wokenup.
Dimly,Iwasawarethatheno
longerheldmyhand.Iheldhisandhisarm,justbelowwheremymouthmoved
againsthisskin.
Thicklasheslifted,andheavily
hoodedblueeyesmetmine.“There’ssomuchsilverinyoureyes.”Hetouched
thesideofmyfacewithjustthetipsofhisfingers.“Icanbarelyseeany
green.”
Mysenseswereopen,andunder
thetasteofhisblood,therewassomethingsmoky—somethingIwasn’tsurehad
todowiththepastorthepresent,andIknewIshould’vecloseddownmy
sensesbeforethis.Ididsothenandthought…
IthoughtIshouldstop.Itwasenough.
Thedrynessinmythroatwasgone.Thegnawingacheinmybellyhadvanished.
Everysensefeltheightenedbutalsorelaxed.Sated.IimaginedKieranhadto
knowI’dtakenenough,buthedidn’tstopme.Slowly,Irealizedthathe
wouldn’t.KieranwouldpreventmefromtakingtoomuchfromCasteel,justashe
hadbefore.Butnow?JustlikeCasteel,he’dletmefeedandfeed.
Andatinypartofmewantedto
keepfeeding.Todrowninhisearthytaste.ButIcouldn’t.Ididn’twantto
weakenhim.Iliftedmymouthfromhisarm.“Thankyou,”Iwhispered.
Kieran’schestrosewithadeep
breath.“Youdon’tneedtothankme,Poppy.”
Myheartwasstillthrumming.So
wasmybody.Ifeltflushed,likethesweaterIworewasalmosttoothick.Not
ashotasithadbeenwithCasteel,whenIhadignitedandcaughtfire.Thiswas
different.Morelikethepleasanthazesecondsbeforefallingasleep.
IstillheldKieran’sarm,andI
didn’tknowwhatprovokedmetospeakwhatIsaw.Ifitwasthebloodorthe
feelingofbeinglighter,warmer,andlessempty.“Isawyourmemories.Iforgot
thatcouldhappen.”Iwatchedhisfaceclosely.“IsawyouandCasteelwhenyou
wereyounger—”
“Weweretryingtocatchfish
withourhands,”hefinishedforme.“Malikhaddaredus.Idon’tevenknowwhy
Ithoughtaboutthat.Justpoppedintomyhead.”Hepaused.“That’snotallyou
saw.”
“No.”
Therewasnohintof
embarrassmentinhisfeatures.Noshame.“You’regoingtobeirritated.”
Ididn’tthinkIwascapableof
feelingthatatthemoment.“Why?”
“WhenIrealizedyouwereinmy
head,IchangedwhatIwasthinkingabout,”hesaid,andIwonderedifthose
rapid,briefimagesIcouldn’tcatchwashimflippingthroughhismemories.“I
thoughtofthebeachonpurpose.Figureditwouldshockyou.”
“Jerk,”Imuttered.
“Butthethingis,”hecontinued
asifhehadn’theardme,“Idon’tthinkitshockedyouatall.Ithinkitintrigued
you.”
I’dbeenwrong.
Iwascapableoffeeling
annoyance.IstartedtoletgoofhisarmwhenInoticedthathiswoundstill
seepedblood.
Slidingmyfingersclosertothe
cuthe’dmade,Ifeltakindoftinglingwarmthdancingdownmyarmsthat
wasn’tallthatdifferentfromhowhisbloodmademefeel.Asoft,silveryglow
radiatedoverhisforearm,seepingintothecuthe’dmade.
Kieranjerkedalittle.“That
feels…different.”
IrealizedIhadneverhealed
Kieranbefore.“Doesitfeelbad?”
“No.”Histhroatworkedona
swallow.
“Let’shopeyouneverhaveto
feelthatagain.”Iletgoofhisarm,andhelookeddownathiswrist.There
wasnothingbutathinlineofbloodthathequicklywipedaway,revealinga
faintpinkmarkthatwouldlikelybegonebymorning.
“You’renotgoingtoacknowledge
whatIsaidaboutyoubeingintrigued?”heasked.
“Nope.”Iscootedbackonthe
bedrollandlaydownonmyside.
Grinning,helookedupfromhis
arm.“Yougoingtopretendthatyoudon’tknowIwaswatchingthebothofyou
andthatyouandCasteelwerewatchingus?”
“Yep.”Iclosedmyeyes.My
heartwasslowing,sowasthethrumminginmyblood.“You’rewelcome,bythe
way.Forhealingyourcut.”
TherewasasoftsnortasIfelt
himmove.Iheardtheclickofthelanternturningoffandthenthesoundofhim
undressing.Afewmomentslater,Ifelthimlaydownbesidemeinhiswolven
form.ThenIfellasleepandsleptdeeply.
ButIdidn’tfindCasteel.
Chapter22
Thegrayofduskhadlongsincegivenwaytothesunas
wecontinuedridingwestandtothesouth.Thesunkenearthenroadknownasthe
WesternPasswasnestledbetweenheavilywoodedlandthatborderedtheouterRises
ofbothThreeRiversandWhitebridge.
KieranandIrodebesidethewagon
ledbyReaver.We’dbeensilentmostofthemorning.Allofuswerealert,our
musclestense.We’dalreadypassedonegroupofHuntsmen.Ikeptmyheaddown,the
wide-brimmedhatandcloakshieldingmyfaceasIkeptmysensesopen,
searchingforanysignsofsuspicion.Therehadbeennoneastheynoddedand
hurriedon,morefocusedongettingtotheirnextlocationthanlookingatus
tooclosely.NoonewantedtolingeroutsideaRise,notevenwithmanyhours
ofdaylightleft.
IglancedoveratKieran.Hewas
staringintothewoods.NothinghadbeenawkwardorweirdbetweenuswhenI
wokethatmorning.Itwasn’tlikeIwaspretendingIhadn’tfedfromhim.Itjust
wasn’tathing.Followinghisgaze,IsquintedasIsearchedthroughthe
glisteningleaves.Ithadrainedthatmorning.Notlong,butenoughtoleave
puddlesintheroad.Throughthetrees,Isawthatlandhadbeenclearedatthe
footoftheRiseforfarming.Wecaughtglimpsesofpeople,theirbacksbentas
theyworkedthefields.
“Aretheychildren?”Reaver
asked,havingcheckedoutwhatwewerelookingat.
Theyweretoofarawayformeto
tellforsure.“Itwouldn’tbeuncommonifso.”
“Shouldtheynotbeinsomesort
oflearninginstitute?”
“Noteverychildreceivesan
education,”Itoldhim,realizingthatReaverwouldhavenoknowledgeofwhat
lifewaslikeinSolis.“Onlythosewhocanaffordtosendtheirchildrento
schooldo,andthat’snotmany.So,alotofthechildrentakeonwork,someas
youngastenyearsofage.Theyendupinthefieldsuntiltheycanlearna
tradeorentertrainingtoguardtheRise.”
“Thatis…”Reavertrailedoff.
“Awful?”Isuppliedforhim.
“AndAtlantia?Isitnodifferent?”
“It’scompletelydifferent,”Kieran
answered.“Allchildrenareeducated.”
“Nomattertheirwealth?”the
drakenquestioned.
“There’snotawealthgaplike
thereishereinSolis.Atlantiatakescareoftheirpeople,whetherornotthey
canworkorwhatskillsandtradestheyhavelearned.”
“WhatwasIliseeumlike?”Iled
Winteraroundaratherlargedipintheroad.
“Dependsonwhereyouwere,”he
answered.“Dependsonwhatyoufoundbeautifulandwhatyoufoundfrightening.”
Ifrowned,butbeforeIcould
askhimtoelaborate,hesaid,“Iguessthemortalrealmhasn’tchangedall
thatmuchsincethelasttimeIwasinit.”
Mybrowslifted.“Youwerehere
before?”
Henodded.“Iwasherewhenthe
areaIbelieveweareridingtowasknownbythenameLasania.”
“Lasagna?”Kieran’sbrowsfurrowed
whileIfrowned.WherehadIseenthatnamebefore?
“No.Ididn’tsaylasagna.I
saidLasania.La-sa-nee-ah,”Reaversnapped.
“Soundedlikelasagnatome,”he
muttered.“Whatwasitlikewhenyouwereawake?ThisLasaniayouspeak
of?”
TheangularfeaturesofReaver’s
facewereshadowedbythebrimofhishatashelookedthroughthetrees.“I
didn’tenterthemortalrealmoften.Onlyafewtimes.Onlywhennecessary.But
Ithinkitwasalotlikethis.LikeSolis.It’swheretheConsortwasborn.She
wasoncethePrincess,thetrueheir.”
Myjawhadtobeonthemuddy
ground.“What?”
“TheConsortwasmortal?”
Kieran’ssurprisematchedmine.
“Partlymortal,”Reaver
corrected,hisgazefollowingaswathofbirdsthatflewoverhead.
“Howcananyonebepartlymortal?”
Idemanded.
“Justlikeyouwerepartlymortal,”
hepointedout.
Oh.Well.Hehadmethere.
Ileanedforward,staringupat
wherehesatonthedriver’sbox.“Howwasshepartlymortal,Reaver?”
Therewasaheavysighasifit
wereknowledgeweshouldalreadyhave.“Shewasbornwithanemberofthe
PrimalofLifeinher.”
“Well.”Idrewouttheword.
“ThatsoundsfardirtierthanIassumewasintended.”
Reaversnorted.
“Whatdoesthatevenmean?”
Kieranasked,andIhadtothinkitwaspossiblythenicestwayhe’deverposed
aquestiontoReaver.
“Itmeansshewasbornwiththe
essenceofthetruePrimalofLifeinher,”heanswered,whichexplained
nothing.“And,no,I’mnottalkingthekindthethirdsonsanddaughtershave.
Thiswasanemberofpurepower.”
Ishookmyhead.“WhyamI
alwaysmoreconfusedafterspeakingwithyou?”
“Thatsoundslikeapersonal
issue,”Reaverstated.
Kieranmadeanoisethatsounded
anawfullotlikeachokedlaugh.Myheadswiveledtohim.Hesmoothedouthis
expression.
“Holdup,”Reaversaid,
stiffening.“Thereisanothergrouponthisroad.”
Ifacedtheroad,seeingnothing
inthedappledsunlight.“IsitmoreHuntsmen?”
“Idon’tthinkso.”Kieran’s
headcockedtothesideashelistened.“Therearetoomanyhorses.”
“Howintheworlddoyouhear
anything?”Imuttered,squintingat…nothing.
“Thisisdefinitelyafarlarger
group,”Reaversaidasanotherclusterofbirdstookflight.
“Couldtheybesoldiers?”I
slowedWinter.We’dseennonesofar,whichmeanttheBloodCrownhadtobe
movingthemthroughtheStroudSea,orthey’dalreadyarrivedandwerewithin
theRises.Theonlyotheroptionwasunlikely—thattheBloodCrownhad
abandonedthecities.
“Givemeafewmoments.”Kieran
handedhisreinsovertome.“I’llseeifIcangetcloseenough.”
“Becareful.”
Withanod,hequickly
dismountedanddisappearedintothetreesandshrubs.
“Ihopehe’squieterthanthat,”
Reaverremarkeddryly.
“Hewillbe.”
Thehandfulofminutesthat
passedbeforeKieran’sreturnfeltlikeaneternity.“Definitelysoldiers.About
twotothreedozentotal,”hesaid.Myheartlurched.“They’reroughlywhere
thewoodsthinout.”
Mygazecuttotheroad.Twoto
threedozenwasalot.
“Icanjustburnthem.”
MyheadswungtowardReaver.
“No.”
“Butitwouldbequick.”
“Absolutely,not.”
“Letmetakecareofthis.”He
startedtodismount.
“Donotgoalldrakenandstart
burningpeople,Reaver.”
“Whynot?It’sfun.”
“That’snotfunforanyone—”
“Itisforme.”
“Stayonyourwagon,”Iordered.
“Youshiftingandburningthingswillalerteveryonethatwehaveadrakenwith
us.IfIsbethtaughtVessahowtoharnessPrimalmagic,thenshecouldalsouse
ittokilltheremainingdraken,”Iremindedhim.“Asfarastheyknow,weno
longerhaveanywithus.”
“Whatever,”hemuttered.
“Ihaveanidea,”Kieransaid.
“It’snotmuch,butiftheygetcloseenoughtoyou,they’regoingtoseethat
you’renoHuntsman.”
Theywouldalsoseethescars.
Kierancrouched,andIwatched
inconfusionashedippedhishandsintooneofthepuddles.“Thiswon’tbefun,
butit’lloffersomecamouflageaslongastheydon’tlooktoocloselyatyour
eyes.”
Thesilvery-whiteaurabehindmy
pupilswasabithardtoconceal,butthiswasbetterthannothing.Ileaneddown,
closingmyeyesasKieranreachedup.Thefeelandtextureofthesludgewasn’t
pleasantashesmootheditovermybrow,alongmycheeks,andthenonmychin.
Ididn’tdarebreathetoodeeplyincasethatwasn’tjustrainandmud
Kierandidthesametohimself.
Hedidn’tofferthesametreatmenttoReaver,andIwasn’tsureifitwasthe
lookthedrakensenthimorthefactthatitwouldbefarmorebizarreforall
ofustobecoveredinmud.
“They’realmostupon
us,”Reaverstated
Kierantookthereinsandreturned
tothesaddle.Heleanedover,tuggingdownthebrimofmyhat.Oureyesmet.
Hespokelow.“WhatyousaidtoReaver.Doesthesamegoforyou?”
Theessencepulsedintenselyin
mychest.“Ihopeitdoesn’tcometomehavingtomakethatchoice,butIwon’t
beasnoticeableasMr.BurnEveryoneoverhereifitdoes.”
Reaversnorted.
“Iwon’tallowustobetaken,”
ItoldKieran,holdinghisstare.“ButrememberwhatIasked.”
HeknewwhatImeant.ThatifI
usedtheessenceandgotalittletoomurderous—ifIdidn’tpullback—hewould
stopme.
Kieran’sjawwashard,buthe
nodded,straighteninghimselfonhissaddle.IkeptmychinduckedasIlifted
mygaze.Reaver’srighthandcasuallyrestedonthehiltoftheswordIknew
wasstowedbetweenthetwoseatsofthebox.
“Nomatterwhat,don’tshift.”I
lookedatReaver.“Don’trevealwhoyouare.”
Hedidn’tlookhappy,buthe
nodded.
Thesoundofapproachinghorses
drovemyheartagainstmyribs,andtheeathervibratedinresponse,whispering
throughmyveins.Mud-splatteredhorsesroundedthebend.Isawthesoldiers’
crimsonandwhitearmor,eachbearingmatchingshieldsengravedwiththeBlood
Crown’sRoyalCrest.Theessencepressedagainstmyskin,tellingmeIcouldstop
thisbeforeitstarted.Icoulddoitquietly,snappingtheirneckswithjust
mywill.Wecouldriderightpastthemasifnothinghadhappened.
Butsomethingwould’vehappened.
Iwould’vekilledmenwhohad
yettoproveathreat.Anactionthatwouldbediscoveredandleadtoquestions—ones
thatcouldalertotherstoourpresence.Anactionthatmadethathollowplace
insidemeevencolder.
“Halt,”asoldiercalledout,
hishelmetadornedwithacombmadeofred-dyedhorsehair.Knightsworethe
same,butforamortal,itsymbolizedthathewasofhighrank.Mostlikelya
lieutenant.
WeobeyedasanyHuntsmenwould
uponanorderfromahigh-rankingsoldier.
Thelieutenantrodeforward,
flankedbythreeotherswhoborenocombsontheirhelmets.Agaiter—athin,
blackcloth—coveredmostofhisface,leavingonlyhiseyesvisiblebeneaththe
helmet.HesentacursoryglanceinReaver’sdirectionandthenlookedatus.
“Wheredoyoutravelfromandwhereto?”
“NewHaven,sir.Weareheaded
fortheWillowPlains.”Kierandidn’tmissabeat.“Orderedtodeliverthe
recentbatchofwhiskey.”
IletmysensesreachoutasI
focusedonthelieutenant.Saltgatheredinmythroat,eitherdistrustor
wariness.Neitherwasuncommon.
Thelieutenantremainedby
Kieran’ssideasanotherrodeforward.“ThreeHuntsmentransportingwhiskey?
Seemslikethat’sonetoomany.”
“Well,sir,”Kieranreplied,
“somewouldthinkdoubletheamountisn’tenoughtoguardsomethingasvaluable
asthesespirits.”
Oneoftheothersoldierschuckled
roughlywhileanotherliftedthetarponthebackofthewagon.Henoddedat
thelieutenant.
Ibitdownontheinsideofmy
lipasthesoldierreachedin,checkingthecrates.Theweaponswe’dstoredin
therewereclosertothebox,butifhefoundthem,itwouldn’traisetoomany
eyebrows.
“WehopetomakeittotheWillow
Plainsbeforenightfall,”Kieranadded,andIslippedmyrighthandunderthe
foldofmycloakasthetasteofwarinessgrewfromthelieutenant.Igrasped
thehandleofthewolvendagger—justincase
Thelieutenanturgedhishorse
forward.“Ibetyoudo.”
Istiffenedatthelow,smoky
rumblethatReavergave.Nooneelseseemedtohaveheard.Iglancedathim,
buthisattentionwasfixedonthelieutenant.
MygriponWinter’sreins
tightenedasthesoldiergaveKieranacloseronce-over.Themanwasolder,
possiblyinhisfourthorfifthdecadeoflife,andthatwasunusualforanyone
whospentanyamountoftimeoutsideaRise.“Whathappenedtoyou?”
“RanintosomeCraveninthe
middleofthenight,”Kierananswered.“Thingsgotabitmessy.”
Thesoldiernoddedasthe
lieutenantdrewcloser,hisgazemovingfromKierantome.Iheldmyselfstill.
“You’reashyone,aren’tyou?
Tooafraidtolookupandmeetthestareofyoursuperior,andyetyou’reout
herebeyondtheRise?”Thelieutenanttskedunderhisbreath.“Andyoungbythe
looksofit.”
Uneaseblossomedashecontinued
tostare.Thoughmyheadwasbowed,Ifelthisgaze.
Hishandlashedout,snapping
hisfingersinfrontofmyface.Arushofpricklyheatsweptovermyskin.
“LookatmewhenIspeaktoyou.”
Acidicangercrowdedmymouthas
mygazeliftedpasttheblackcloth,tomeetsteelygrayeyes.
Along,tensemomentofsilence
stretchedastheothersoldierturnedhishorsearound.Thelieutenantheldmy
stare,hiseyesslowlywidening.Iknewthenthathesawtheglowbehindmy
pupils.Hisemotionscloggedmythroat.Distrustgavewaytoaquickburstof
bubblyaweandthenthetaintofbitterfear.“Goodgods,”heuttered,andIknew
thenthatourpaltrycoverwasblown.“TheHarbinger—”
Isnappedforward,unsheathing
mydaggerinonequickmove.Thelieutenant’sreflexeswerewell-honed,buthe
wasmortal,andIwasnot.Hewithdrewhissword,butthatwasasfarashe
got.Ithrustthedaggerthroughtheneckofhisgaiterandintohisthroat.
Hiswordsendedinawetgurgle.
“Thatwasforsnappingyourfingers
inmyface.”Ijerkedthebladefree.Thelieutenantgraspedforhisthroatas
hetoppledfromhissaddle,hittingthemuddyroadonhisside.
Asortofcontrolledchaos
explodedasReavertwistedatthewaist,releasingaslenderknife.Thebladestruck
thesoldierbeforethemanhadachancetoreacttohislieutenant’sdemise.
Kieranwasoffhishorseintheblinkofaneyeandbesidetheother.Hecaught
thesoldierbythearm,tearinghimfromhismount.
“CanIburnthemnow?”Reaver
askedastheremainingsoldierssprangintoaction.Severalchargedforwardon
theirhorsesasKieranleaptontothebackofasoldier’shorse.Ablade
glintedinthesunlightasitsweptacrossthesoldier’sthroat.
“No.”IswungoffWinter,
landinginacrouchasIsheathedthewolvendagger.“Noburning.”
“Nofun,morelikeit.”Reaver
reacheddown,withdrawingacrossbowIhadn’tevenknownwasbyhisfeetasI
reachedtomyhip,pullingashortswordfree.
Reaverrosefromthebox,
crossbowinhand.Hefiredinrapidsuccession,takingoutseveralsoldiers
withenviousprecision.Soldiersonfootracedbehindthefleeinghorses.Imet
theheavyswingfromamuchbigger,broadersoldier.Theimpactoftheblow
rattledmyarm.Thesoldierlaughed.Igruntedastheessencemergedwithmy
will.Iusedittogivethemountainofamanalittlepush.Nothingthat
requiredalargeexpenditureofenergy,butthesoldierskiddedbackseveral
feet,hiseyesabovehisgaiterflaringwide.
IdidasVikterhaddrilledinto
methroughourhoursoftraining.Ishutitdown.Allofit.Mysenses.Myfear
thateitherKieranorReavermaymisstepandbetakendown.Thattheywouldbe
injuredorworsebeforeIcouldgettothem.Icloseddownmyemotionsasthe
mancaughthimselfbeforefallingbackward.IdidwhatVikterhadtaught.But
thistime,Ifoughtasifeachbreathmyfriendstookmightbetheir
last.Dippinglow,IplantedmyfreehandinthedampsoilasIkickedout,
sweepingthesoldier’slegsoutfromunderhim.Hehitthegroundwithagroan.
Kieranwassuddenlythere,
slamminghissworddown,justabovethebreastplateasIrose.Hegavetheblade
aquicktwistashemetmygaze.“Weneedtogetoutofhere.”
“Agreed.”Ilookeduptosee
Reaverstrikingdownanothersoldierwithabrutalblowtothehead.
“Incoming,”Kieranwarnedashe
withdrewhisswordfromasoldier’sback.
Myheadsnappedforward.Upahead,
atthebend,agrouprodehard,thewhitemantleoftheRoyalGuardstreaming
fromtheirshoulders.Theirpresencewasnotremotelygood.Mymindraced
throughthepossibilities.Wehadtogetoutofherefast,whichmeant
abandoningthewagon.Thatcouldposeaproblemdowntheroad,butwe’dhaveto
dealwiththatlater.
Prowlingforward,Isteppedinto
theattack,twistingundertheswingofasword.Ispunbackasanarrow
whizzedpastmyhead,slammingintothesideofthewagonwheretheshaftvibrated.
Ishovedtheswordintotheman’schestbetweenhisplatesofarmor.Whirling
around,Igrippedasoldier’shelmet,yankinghisheadbackasIdrewtheblade
acrosshisthroat.Ireleasedtheman,lettinghimfallforwardasanotherarrow
cutthroughtheair,hittingthegroundbeforeme.
Idrewtoahalt,theair
punchingoutofmylungsasIsawthearrowhead—theshiny,blackarrowhead—embedded
intheground.
Shadowstone
MyeyesshottotheRoyalGuards
astheydescendedonus.Anotherarrowstreakedthroughtheair,nearly
strikingReaver.Furyexploded,minglingwiththeeather.Kieranwhippedtoward
theRoyalGuards,cursingasIsummonedthePrimalessence.Itrespondedinan
immediaterush,hittingmyskin,andcrowdingtheedgesofmyvisioninsilver
asIloweredthesword,walkingforward.PassingKieran,Itossedtheswords
asideastheeatherspilledoutfromme,flowingoverthemuddiedearthin
ripplinglight—light,andfaint,churningshadows.Mywillmergedwith
theessenceofthePrimalgodasthefirstrowofRoyalGuardsboredownonus,
theirswordsraised.
Theirheadsjerkedsharplyto
theside,oneafteranother.Fiveofthem.Theirswordsslippedfromtheir
suddenlyemptygrasps,andtheyfellwiththeirweapons,deadbeforetheyevenleft
theirsaddles.ThehorsesgallopedpastmeasKieranshouted—
Red-hotpainexplodednearmy
collarbone,knockingmebackastep.IsuckedinaburningbreathasIlooked
downtoseeanarrowjuttingfrommyshoulder.
Theeatherthrobbedviolently,
matchingthepumpingwaveofpainradiatingfrommyarm.ThePrimalessence
pouredintoeverycellandspaceinmybody,fillingmythroatwiththat
shadowy,smoky-sweettaste.Thetasteofdeath
AndthatwaswhatIbecame.
Death.
TheHarbingerthelieutenanthad
calledme.
“Oh,shit,”Reavermutteredfrom
behindme.
Igrippedtheshaftofthe
arrow,feelingnothingasItoreitfree.MylipcurledasIcaughtsightof
theshadowstoneandtheblooddrippingfromit—myblood.Theessencesparked
frommyfingersandrippledacrossthearrow,burningtheshaftfirstbefore
seepingintotheshadowstonetip,shatteringitfromtheinside.
Undermyfeet,theroadtrembled
andcrackedopen.Thickrootsspilledout,unfurling,andthensinkingdeepinto
themud.Thescentofbloodandrichsoilgrewheavyasthegroundgroaned.A
shadowfelluponmeasabloodtreegrew,itsbarkaglisteninggray.Tinybuds
sproutedfromthebarelimbs,unfurlingintobrightred,bloodleaves.
IheardshoutsasKieranreached
forme.CallstofireasReaverclashedwiththeRoyalGuardswhostreamedfrom
betweenthetrees.Anothervoicecamefromunderitall.Onethaturged
caution.Demandedtheguardsfallback.OneIalmostrecognized.
Liftingmyhead,Iscannedthesoldiers,
findingthearchertothesideoftheroad,crouchedatthetrunkofatree.My
eyesnarrowedasmywillswelledoncemore.Hisnecktwistedasdidhisbody,
bonecrackingashejerkedsideways.Thearrowreleasedashefell,findinga
targetinoneoftheRoyalGuards.Asharpyelpofpainfollowed.Theeatherchurned
wildlyaroundme,snakingbetweenmylegs,snappingofftheground,spreading
towardthemassiveoaks.Andthatcold,aching,emptypartofmegrewandgrew
asIturnedmyattentiontotheothersridinguponus.Thebitternessoftheir
fear,thehotacidityoftheiranger,andtheirsaltyresolvestretchedout,
fillingthathollowspacewithinme.Itookitin.Itookitallinasthe
shimmeringcordsstretchedoutinmymind,arcingacrosstheroadand
connectingwitheachofthem.
Iturneditbackonthem,
feedingthemallthatfearandanger.Allthedetermination,fury,and…death
Theydroppedtheirreinsand
weapons,clutchingtheirheadsasallthatemotionpouredintothem.Theirscreams—their
howlsofpain—toretheairasIdriftedforward.Iglidedbetweenthe
anxioushorses,theirriderstumblingfromthesaddlesbothbehindmeandin
frontofme.Theywitheredontheroad,tearingattheirhairasthechurning
massoflightanddarknesspulsed,ripplingoutfrombetweentheprancing
horses,searchingandsearching—
“That’senough,”ashoutrangout.
Avoicethatstoppedme.
OneIfinallyrecognized.
Ifoundit.Foundherstanding
inthecenteroftheroad,anightmareofcrimson—acrimsoncoatlikeasecond
skin,buttonedfromherwaisttoherchin.Inkyblackhairthatfelloverher
shoulders,framingafacehalf-obscuredbyamaskofwingspaintedinadeep
red.
ButIknewitwasher
“You,”Iwhispered,andthatone
wordreachedherinawaveofsmokeandshadow.
TheHandmaidensmiled.“Wemeet
again.”
Shewasn’talone.
Ididn’tfocusontheRoyal
Guardsstandingnearher,theirswordstrembling.Itwastheothers.
Theonescloakedinthecolorofblood.Tenofthem.Noneoftheirfaceswere
visible.Norweretheirhands,oranyotherpartsoftheirbodies.ButIknew
inmybonesthattheywereRevenants.
ThePrimalessenceswirledand
snappedaroundme,stretchingoutandthenrecoilingasitnearedthe
Revenants.IfeltthepressofKieran’sbodybehindmeandheardReaver’slow
snarl.Myattentionremainedfixedonher.“I’mnothereforanyof
thesecities,”Itoldher.
Herpale,palesilver-bluestare
metmine.“Yet.”
“Yet,”Iconfirmed.
“Iknowwhatyou’reherefor.”
Myfingerssplayedatmysides,
sparkingembersofsilveryfireandthickshadows.“Thenyoushouldknowyou
won’tstopmethistime.”
“Debatable.”
Angerpulsedthroughme,
silencingthelittlevoicethatwantedtoremindmeofwhatI’dfeltwhenthe
BloodQueenhadorderedherforward—thatdesperationandhopelessness.Two
thingsI’dfeltoverandovereverytimeDukeTeermansummonedmetohisoffices.
Whatshefeltcouldn’tmatter.
Reavercreptinclose,hisvoice
onlyformetohear.“CanIburnthem?”
Thecornerofmylipsturnedup,
andIstartedtotellhimyes.
“Shewillkillhim,”
theHandmaidenspoke.
Everythingstopped.Reaver’s
breath.Thepulsingeather.Everything.MyentirebeingfocusedonherasI
feltCasteel’sringbetweenmybreastslikeabrand.
“Ifyousomehow,intheunlikely
event,makeitpastus,shewillknow,andshewillkill
him,”theHandmaidensaidsoftly.“She’lltellyoushedidn’twantto,anda
partofherwillbespeakingthetruthbecausesheknowswhatthatwilldo.What
painitwillcauseyou.”
“I’mnofool,”Isnarled.
Herheadcocked.“DidIsayyou
were?”
“Youmustthinksoifyou
believeIcanbeconvincedthatsheactuallycaresaboutthepainshe
inflicts.”
“Whatyoubelieveisirrelevant.
Allthatmattersisthatshebelievesit.Actually,it’snotallthatmatters.Her
killinghimalsodoes,”sheaddedwithahalf-shrug.“Doesn’tit?She’llmakea
dramaticshowofit,too.Sendhimbackinmorepiecesthistime.One
atatime—”
“Shutup.”Isteppedforward,
theessencewhippingaroundme,lashinganinchfromherface.
TheHandmaidendidn’teven
flinch.“We’vebeenwaitingforyoutomakeamove.TocomeforyourKing.We
knewthereweretwopathsyou’dlikelyattempt.TheQueenbelievedyouwould
comestraightforCarsodonia,righttothegatesoftheRise,provingtothe
peoplethatyouaretheHarbingerofDeathandDestruction.”
Mystomachsouredwithreturning
dread.IfthepeoplewerebeingtoldIwasaHarbinger,thewarandits
aftermathwouldbesomuchmorecomplicated.
“Ididn’tbelievethat,”she
continued.“Isaidyou’dcomeinthroughthebackdoor.Themines.”The
Handmaidensmiled,andKierancursedbehindme,buttherewassomethingabout
hersmile.Somethingfamiliar.“That’swhatIwoulddo.”
Itwasnotentirelyshocking
thattheysuspectedIwouldattemptsomethinglikethis.Weknewthat.Whatwas
surprisingwasthatthisHandmaidenhadassumedcorrectly.
Atthemoment,noneofthatwas
important.“SheknowswhatIwilldoifshekillshim.Shewouldn’tdare.”
“Butshewould.”TheHandmaiden
steppedforward.“Iamherfavorite…afteryou.”
Again.Therewassomethingabout
thewayshesaidthat.Itcrackedtheholdmyfuryhadonme.Iwasn’tsure
whatitwas,though.
“Poppy,”Kieranspokequietlybehind
me.“Ifshespeaksthetruth…”
Iwouldn’triskCasteel.
Notagain.
ThebreathItooktastedlessof
smoke,fire,anddeath.Ipulledtheeatherin.Thetendrilsretracted,
slippingoverthegrassandroadasthehuminmybloodcalmed.Theangerremained,
onlyleashed.Asthesilveryglowfadedfrommyvision,thedeepthrobinmy
shoulderflaredtolife,remindingmethatoneofthemhadmanagedtohitme.
Iwouldhavetodealwiththat
later.
“Whathappensnow?”Iasked.
TheHandmaiden’schindipped.“We
willescortyoutoCarsodonia,whereyouwillmeetwiththeQueen.”
Ilaughed.“Notgoingtohappen.”
“Idon’tthinkyouunderstand—”
“No,youdon’tunderstand.”
Icrossedtheshortdistancebetweenus,stoppingdirectlyinfrontofher.Up
close,Irealizedwewerethesameheight.Herbuildwasalittlenarrowerthan
mine,butnotbymuch.“JustbecauseIwon’tkillyoudoesn’tmeanIwillgo
alongwithanyofyourplans.”
“Thatwouldbeamistake.”Her
eyesnarrowedbehindthepaint.“Whydoyouhavemudonyourface?”
“Whydoyouhavepainton
yours?”Ifiredback.
“Touché,”shemurmured.“But
that’snotananswer.”
Thebreezestirredthen,kicking
upascent—oneofdecayand…stalelilacs.Mygazeflickeredtotheimmobile
Revenants.“Theystink.”
“That’srude.”
Ilookedbackather.“Butyou
don’t.”
“Idon’t,”shesaid,andthat
wasstrange.
Butitalsodidn’tmatter.“Ithink
youjustneedtotakeyourmerrybandofstinkersandgetoutofourway.”
TheHandmaidenlaughed—itwasdeep
andshortbutsoundedgenuine.“Andletyouandyourmerrybandofextremely
good-lookingmenpass?”Shedippedherheadtomine,speakingsoquietlyI
barelyheardher.“Notgoingtohappen,Penellaphe.”
Staringather,Iopenedmy
sensestoherandfeltsugaryamusement.Thatwasall.Anditdidn’ttellme
much.
“You’reoutofchoices,Queenof
FleshandFire,”shesaid.“Ifyou’reassmartasIhope,Iwouldthinkyou’drealize
thatyouwon’tgetintothecapitalunnoticed.Notthroughtheminesorthe
gates.”
Izeroedinonherwordchoice.
Shedidn’tsaythatIwouldn’tescape.OnlythatIwouldn’tgetinto
thecapitalunnoticed.Thatwasstrange.
Butalso,shewasright.
Therewouldbenosneakattacks.
Iwouldn’triskCasteelbyallowingReavertofinallygetwhathewanted.This
wasn’tthebestwayintothecapital.Wewouldbeunderguard,butitwasaway
in.
“Letmypeoplego,andIwill
notfightyouonthis,”Itoldher.
“Absolutely,not,”Kieranbarked
out,appearingatmysideatonce.“Wewillnotbeseparated.”
IturnedtoKieran,buthecut
meoffbeforeIcouldsayanotherword.“Don’tstart.We’renotleavingyour
side.Atall.”HesaidthelastintheHandmaiden’sdirection.“It’snotgoing
tohappen.”
Hisloyaltywasadmirable,andI…
Thedrakensteppedforward.“If
youwanttheQueenofFleshandFire,theBringerofLifeandBringerof
Death…”hesaid—admittedly,Ipreferredhisversionofthetitletheprophecy
hadgivenme—“toaccompanyyoutothecapital,thenyouwillallowher
advisorandmetotravelwithherasacontinuationofthatgoodfaith.”
Kieran’sgazeheldmine,aclear
warninginthemthatneitherhenorReaverwouldallowmetogoalone.
Swallowingthefrustrationandworrythatthiswasfartoodangerousforthem,I
turnedtotheHandmaiden.“Thatisyourchoice.Becausecontrarytowhatyou
think,Iamnotoutofchoices.”
“Whatever,”theHandmaiden
replied.“Icouldn’tcareless.It’snotlikeyou’reprisoners.”
Kieran’sheadsnappedinher
direction.
“What?”sheasked,wideningher
eyesinfeignedsurprise.
“We’renotprisoners?”Iquestioned.
“No.Youwillbeguests.”
TheHandmaidenbowedwiththekindofflourishI’donlythoughtEmilcapable
of.“Honoredguests.Youare,afterall,thedaughteroftheQueen,andagod.
Youandwhoeveraccompaniesyouwillbetreatedwiththeutmostrespect,”
shesaidwithabright,overlywidesmile.“Andiftheydidn’twantto
joinyou,theycouldfuckrightoffforallIcare.”
Ididn’tbelievethe
being-treated-with-respectpartforonesecond.
“Eitherway,Idohopewe’llbe
onourwayshortly.TheQueenwishestospeakwithyouaboutthefutureofthe
kingdomsandtheTrueKingoftheRealms,”sheadded,holdingmystareand…
“Youhaven’tblinkedonce.
That’screepy,”Itoldher,glancingbackattheRevenants.Theystillhadn’t
moved.“Notascreepyasthem,though.”
Shesnorted.“Youhaven’tseen
creepyyet.”
“Somethingtolookforwardto,I
suppose.”
“Then…”Shesteppedtotheside,
extendingherarm.
Amixtureofdreadand
anticipationrose.“Iwill…”Afloraltastefilledthebackofmymouthasa
whirloftinglesflowedfrommythrobbingshoulder,overmychestanddownmy
legs.
Kierangrabbedmyarm,butI
didn’tfeelit.“Poppy?”
“I—”Asuddenrushofdizziness
sweptthroughme,followedbythesharpriseofnausea.Itwistedawayfrom
Kieran,halfafraidImightvomitonhim.Mywide,stingingeyesconnectedwith
theHandmaiden’s.
“Shadowstone,”I
whisperedhoarsely.
Shestaredatme,herlips
moving,butIcouldn’thearwhatshewassaying.Icouldn’thearanything.My
heartlurched,andthenmylegswentoutfromunderme.
Andthen…therewasnothing.
Chapter23
“You’vegottoletgo,baby.Youneedtohide,
Poppy—”Mommastilledandthenpulledaway,reachinginsideherboot.She
pulledaslender,blackbladefreeandthenspun,risingsofastIcouldbarely
trackhermovements.
Someoneelsewashere.
“Howcouldyoudothis?”
Mommasteppedtothesidesoshepartiallyblockedthecupboard,butIcould
seethatamanwasinthekitchen.Someoneclothedinnight.
“I’msorry,”hesaid,andI
didn’tknowhisvoice.
“SoamI.”Mommaswungout,
butthecloakedmancaughtherarm…
Andthentheystoodthere,
notmoving.Iwasfrozeninthecupboard,heartracingandsweating.
“Ithastobedone,”theman
said.“Youknowwhatwillhappen.”
“She’sbutachild—”
“Andshewillbetheendof
everything.”
“Orsheisjusttheendofthem.
Abeginning—”
Glassbroke,andtheair
filledwithshrieks.“Momma!”
Herheadjerkedaround.
“Run.Run—”
Thekitchenseemedtoshakeandrattle.Darknessflowedintotheroom,slidingdownthewallsandspilling
acrossthefloor,andIwasstillfrozen.Grayanddullthingsfilled
thechamber,drippingred.“Momma!”
Bodiessnappedinmy
direction.Mouthswithsharpteeth.Shrillhowlsrippedthroughtheair.Bony,
coldfingerspressedintomyleg.Iscreamed,scramblingbackinsidethe
cupboard—
Somethingwetandsmellysplashed
acrossmyface,andthecoldfingersreleasedme.Istartedtoclimbfarther
back.
Thedarkmanfilledthe
mouthofthecupboard.Hereachedinside,andtherewasnowheretogo.He
grabbedmyarm,yankingmeout.“Gods,helpme.”
Panicked,Ituggedathis
holdashesweptouthisotherhand,knockingdownthecreaturesastheycame
athim.MyfootslippedinthewetnessasItwistedsideways—
Mommawasthere,herface
streakedwithred.Shewasbleedingasshethrusttheblackbladeintothe
man’schest.Hegrunted,sayingawordI’dheardPapasayonce.Hisgrip
slippedawayashestumbledbackward.
“Run,Poppy.”Mommagasped.
“Run.”
Iran.Irantowardher—
“Momma—”Clawscaughtmy
hair,scratchedmyskin,burningmelikethetimeI’dreachedforthekettle.I
screamed,strainingforMomma,butIcouldn’tseeherinthetwiningmasson
thefloor.
IsawPapa’sfriendinthe
doorway.Hewassupposedtohelpus—helpMomma—buthestaredatthemanin
blackasherosefromthemassoftwisting,feedingcreatures,andhisbitter
horrorfilledmymouth,chokingme.Hebackedaway,shakinghishead,leaving
us.Hewasleavingus—
Teethsankintomyarm.
Fierypainrippedthroughmyarmandlitacrossmyface.Ifell,tryingtoshake
themoff.“No.No.No,”Iscreamed,thrashing.“Momma!Papa!”
Deep,forbiddingpainsliced
throughmystomach,seizingmylungsandmybody.
Thentheywerefallingall
aroundmeandonme,limpandheavy,andIcouldn’tbreathe.Thepain.The
weight.Iwantedmymomma.
Suddenlytheyweregone,and
ahandwasonmycheek,myneck.“Momma.”Iblinkedthroughbloodandtears.
TheDarkOnestoodaboveme,
hisfacenothingbutshadowsbeneaththehoodedcloak.Itwasn’thishandatmy
throatbutsomethingcoldandsharp.Hedidn’tmove.Thathandtrembled.He
shook.“Iseeit.Iseeherstaringbackatme.”
“Shemust…he’sherviktor,”
IheardMommasayinavoicethatsoundedwet.“Doyouunderstandwhatthatmeans?
Please.Shemust…”
“Goodgods.”
Thecoldpresswasgonefrom
mythroat,andIwasliftedintotheair,floatingandfloatinginthewarm
darkness,mybodytherebutnot.Iwasslippingawayintothenothingness,
surroundedbythesmellofflowers.OfthepurpleblossomstheQueenlikedto
haveinherbedchamber.Lilacs.
Someoneelsewaswithmein
thevoid.Theydrewcloser,adifferentkindofdarknessbeforetheyspoke.
Whatapowerfullittleflower
youare.
Whatapowerfulpoppy.
Pickitandwatchitbleed.
Notsopowerfulanylonger.
Wakingwasachore.
IknewIneededto.Ihadto
makesuremypeoplewereokay.TherewasCasteel.Andthatnightmare…Iwanted
togetasfarawayfromitaspossible,butmybodyfeltheavyanduseless,not
evenconnectedtome.Iwasfloatingsomewhereelse,andIdriftedanddrifted
untilInolongerfeltweigheddown.Itookasudden,deepbreath,andmylungs
expanded.
“Poppy?”Ahandcametomycheek,
warmandfamiliar.
Iforcedmyeyesopen.
Kieranhoveredaboveme,just
like…liketheDarkOnehadinthenightmare.Kieran’sfacewasonlyfuzzy
aroundtheedges,though,notunseentome.“Hi.”
“Hi?”Aslowsmilespreadasa
roughlaughlefthim.“Howareyoufeeling?”
Iwasn’tsureasIwatchedhis
featuresclearevenmore.“Okay.Ithink.Whathappened?”Iswallowed—and
stiffened—attheearthy,woodsyflavorinthebackofmythroat,quickly
becomingawarethatIwaslyingonsomethingimpossiblysoft.“Didyoufeedme?
Again?”Ididn’thearReaveroranyoneelse.“Wherearewe?”
“Onequestionatatime,okay?”
Hishandremainedonmycheek,keepingmyeyesonhis.“Thatshadowstonearrowwas
coatedinsomekindoftoxin.Millicentsaiditwouldonlyleaveyouunconscious
forafewdays—”
“Millicent?”Mybrowsfurrowed.
“TheHandmaiden.That’sher
name,”hetoldme.“SinceI’dtrustapitviperoverher,Igaveyoublood,
justincase.”
“You…shouldn’thavegivenme
moreblood.Youneedit.”
“Thewolvenarelikethe
Atlantians.Ourbloodreplenishesitselfquickly.It’soneofthereasonswe
healsofast,”hesaid,andIrememberedCasteelsayingsomethingsimilar.
“Doesyourarmhurtatall?ThelasttimeIchecked,itlookedhealed.”
“Itdoesn’thurt.Thankstoyou,
I’msure.”Istartedtoturnmyhead,buthisthumbsweptovermychin,holding
methere.Myheartstutteredassomethingelsehe’dsaidcametotheforefront
ofmymind.“HowlonghaveIbeenoutofit?”
Thewayhelookedatmesentmy
heartracing.“Youwereasleepforabouttwodays,Poppy.”
Iheldhisstare,andIwasn’t
surewhichthinghitmefirst.Thesaltybreezeliftingthesheercurtainsfrom
anearbywindow.ThesoftbedIlayuponthathadalwaysbeenbig,no
matterhowsmallI’dbeen.ThelackoftheHuntsmencloakandthemutedgray,
sleevelesstunicKieranworeinitsplace.OrthattheeerierhymeI’dheardin
mynightmarehadbeenslightlydifferent.Iturnedmyhead.Thistime,Kieran
didn’tstopme.Hishandslidfrommycheektothebed.Beyondhim,Isawa
sweepingmarbleandsandstoneceilinghigherthanmanyhomes—onepaintedinpastel
bluesandwhites—betweencurvedcolumnsthatflowedfromthewallsandalong
thedome-shaped…towerchamber.
Theeatherhummedinmychestas
mygazeshiftedtowhereIknewtwopillarswouldstand,framingadoorplated
ingold.Onethathadoftenbeenleftunlocked,butIseriouslydoubtedwas
now.Thechamberwasn’tsmallorlarge,butitwasaslushasI
remembered.Palegraycanopiesweretiedbacktothefourpostsofthebed.A
thick,creamrugcoveredthefloorbetweenthebedandthepillars.Adainty,
gold-trimmedtablesattoonesidewithgold-adornedchairs.Asprawling
wardrobetookuponewall—onethathadonceheldmoredollsandtoysthanit
didclothing.
Kieranbarelyhadachancetoavoid
collidingwithmeasIsatup.“Youshouldtakeiteasy—”
Swingingmylegsoffthebed,I
stood.Ifeltdizzy,butithadnothingtodowiththeshadowstoneorthe
toxin.DisbelieffloodedmeasIcrossedthecircularchamber.
“Ornot,”hemuttered.
Iwenttothewindow,myheart
inmythroat.Grabbingafistfulofthebuttery-softcurtain,Iyankedit
aside,eventhoughIknewwhatIwouldsee.
Thetopsofcoveredbreezeways
thattraveledacrossthemanicuredcourtyard,whichsatintheshadowofaninner
walltallerthanmostRises.Thestatelyestatesthatsatnestledbeyondyet
anotherwall.Myeyeslatchedontotherowsofbright,pinkish-purplejacaranda
treesliningtheroadbeyondtheinnergates.Ifollowedthemintotherolling
hillsfullofbrightgreentrees,andtheterracottaroofs,sittingsideby
side,coveredinvinessmotheredbyredpoppies.IsawtheTemples.Theywere
thetallestbuildingsinCarsodonia—stretchinghigherthanevenWayfairCastle,
andbothcouldbefoundintheGardenDistrict.Onewasconstructedof
shadowstone,andtheotherwasmadeofdiamond—crusheddiamondandlimestone.I
followedthevibranttreesstraighttowheretheGoldenBridgeglintedinthe
sun.
WewereinCarsodonia.
Iwhippedaround.“Whendidwe
gethere?”
“Lastevening.”Kieranrose.
“TheybroughtusstraighttoWayfair.Somegoldenfuckwaswaitingforusat
thedoors.Hewantedtoseparateus.Saiditwouldbeinappropriateforustobe
togetherorsomeshit,butItoldhimexactlyhow—ingreatdetail—thatwasn’t
goingtohappen.”
Ihadnoideawhothegoldenfuck
was.“AndReaver?”
“Thedrakenisinachamber
below.We’reinthe—”
“EastwingofWayfair.Iknow.
ThiswasmychamberwhenIlivedhere,”Iinterrupted,andhisjawflexedinresponse
tothatpieceofinformation.“Haveyoubeeninherethiswholetime?Howdo
youknowReaverisokay?”
“They’vebroughthimbywhenIdemanded
toseehim.Hewasratherwell-behaved,whichwasprobablythemostunnerving
thing.Butlikeme,theygavehimcleanclothingandfood.He’sunderguardin
hischambers.”Hesmirked.“Well,aslockedinastheythinkweare.Theyhave
nocluewhatheis.Iftheydid,Idoubtthey’djustputhiminachamber,lock
thedoor,andcallitaday.”
“Andhetrulystayedinhis
room?”
Henodded.“Evenheseemsto
knowbetterthantogooffhalf-cockedwhenwe’reliterallyintheheartof
enemyterritory.”
ThePrimalessencepressed
againstmyskin,respondingtothewhirlwindofemotions.IfeltasifI
mightgooffhalf-cocked.“Thesatchel—”
“It’srightthere.Igrabbed
it.”Henoddedtotheivory-cushionedchairontheothersideofthebed.
Thankthegods.“Haveyou…have
youseenher?”
TheBloodQueen.
Isbeth.
“No.Ihaven’tevenseenany
Ascendedotherthanasmallarmyofknights.They’reeverywhere.Outsidethis
room,inthehall,oneveryfloor,”hetoldme.“Ihalf-expectedthemtobein
thedamnwardrobe.TheHandmaidensandthatgoldendickhavebeentheonlyones
tointeractwithus.”
Butshewashere.
Shehadtobe.
“Malik?”
Kieranshookhishead.
Iclosedmyeyes,takingadeep
breath.“Whoisthegoldenoneyouspeakof?”
“Name’sCallum.He’saRevenant.
Andthere’ssomethingreallyoffabouthim.”
“There’ssomethingreallyoff
aboutallofthis,”Imurmured.Myheadfeltasifitwereallovertheplace,
bouncingfromtheconfusingnightmaretotheknowledgethatwewereinCarsodonia.
InsideWayfair.Itwasalottoprocess—howmuchourplanshadgoneoffthe
rails.Howmuchcontrolwe’deitherlostorneverhad.Afissureofpanic
boltedthroughme,threateningtosinkitsclawsindeep.Icouldn’tletthat
happen.Toomuchwasatstake.Ihadtodeal.
MyhandstrembledasIclosed
thematmysides.“WhataboutthatHandmaiden?Millicent?”
“Haven’tseenhersincewe
arrivedhere.”
Idrewinashallowbreath.“Did
youcatchhowshesaidwewouldn’tgetintoCarsodoniaunnoticedifwedidn’t
gowithher?Notthatwewouldn’tescape.Didthatseemoddtoyou?”
“There’sliterallynotonething
aboutherthatIdon’tfindodd.”
Well,Ihadtoagreewiththat.
Willingmythoughtstoslowand
focus,Iplacedmyhandsonthewarmledgeofthewindowandlookedout.Faint
pinkstreakedthesky.Mygazeimmediatelylandedontheshadowstonespiresof
theTempleofNyktosandthentheshimmeringdiamonddomeoftheTempleofPerses.
Theysatacrossfromoneanother,indifferentneighborhoods,onelookingto
theStroudSeaandtheotherintheshadowsoftheCliffsofSorrow.
IfCasteelwasundergroundand
inatunnelsystemliketheoneinOakAmbler,hecouldbeundereitherof
them.
Socouldmyfather.
IwaswhereIwantedtobe,but
itwasn’thowI’dwantedtogethere.IfocusedonthedistantGoldenBridge,
whichseparatedtheGardenDistrictfromthelessfortunateareasof
Carsodonia.Myheartfinallyslowed.Mythoughtscalmingastheeathersettled
inmychest.“Thisisn’tentirelybad.”
“It’snot,”Kieranagreed,
joiningmeatthewindow.“We’rehere.”
“It’snotlikewe’llhavefree
roamofthecastleorthecity,”Ireasoned.“Wewillbewatchedclosely,and
there’snotellingwhattheBloodQueenhasplanned.Shewon’tleaveeveryone
intheirroomsfedandclothedforlong.”
“No,that’snotherstyle.”Kieran’s
gazefollowedmine.
Seagullsdippedandswayedover
theRise,whereitbegantocurveandlookoutoverLowerTownandthenthe
sea,wherethesettingsunglistenedoffthebluewaters.Thesoftglowsettled
overtherooftopgardensandpitchedroofs,andevenfartherout,wherethe
homeswerestackedoneuponanotherandtherewasbarelyroomtobreathe,warm
lightbathedthecity.Carsodoniawasbeautiful,especiallyatduskanddawn,
justliketheBloodForest.Furtherproofthatsomethingsostunningonthesurface
couldalsobeuglyunderneath.
“Wheredoyouthinkourarmies
arenow?”Iasked.
“ThearmiesshouldbeatNew
HavenorevenWhitebridgebynow,”hetoldme.“They’dbethreetofourdays
out.”Hisheadtiltedasheeyedme.“Ifwedon’treturntoThreeRiverswhen
wetoldValyn,they’llcomelooking.”
Inodded.
“Howfarwereyouableto
communicatewithDelanothroughthenotam?”
“Prettyfar.Hewasableto
contactmefromtheWastelandsonce,butIdon’tthinkIcouldreachhimthisfar
out.”
“Idon’tthinksoeither.”He
lookedatthewindow.“ButCarsodoniacan’tbemuchbiggerthanthedistancebetween
theWastelandsandPompay,isit?”Kieranturnedtome.“Whatifhewasableto
getclosetotheRise?”
Istaredatthemassivewallthat
loomedinthedistance.“Icouldreachhim.”
Sometimelater,Istood,blankeyesstaringatmefrom
shiny,porcelainfacesneatlylinedupalongtheshelvesononesideofthe
wardrobe.
“Pleaseclosethatdoor,”Kieran
saidfrombehindme.
“Scaredofdolls?”
“MorelikeI’mscaredofthose
dollsstealingmysoul.”
Awrygrintuggedatmylipsas
Iclosedthedoor.I’dbeensnooping,lookingforanythingthatcouldbeused
asaweapon.Istillhadmywolvendaggeronme,butthey’dstrippedKieran’s
andReaver’sweapons.I’dofferedKierantheblade,buthe’drefused.Neither
ofthemwasdefenseless,butitwould’vemademefeelbetterifhehadtaken
thedagger.
“Didyouactuallyplaywiththem
asachild?”Kieranstaredattheclosedwardrobeasifheexpectedadollto
crackopenthedoorandstickitsheadout.
“Idid.”Turningtohim,Ileaned
againstthewardrobe.
“Thatexplainsalot.”
Irolledmyeyes.“She…Isbeth
usedtogivemeoneeveryyearonthefirstdayofsummeruntiltheysentmeto
Masadonia.Iusedtothinktheywerebeautiful.”
Kieran’slipcurled.“Theyare
terrifying.”
“Yeah,buttheirfaceswere
smoothandflawless.”Itouchedthescarrunningalongmynow-warmcheek.“Mine
obviouslywasn’t,soIpretendedIlookedlikethem.”
Hisfeaturessoftened.“Poppy…”
“Iknow.”Myentirefacefelt
likeitwasonfire.“Itwassilly.”
“Iwasn’tgoingtosayitwas
silly—”
Aloudbangsoundedonthe
gildeddoorsasecondbeforetheyswungopen.
Itwasher.
TheHandmaiden.
Millicentsaunteredinto
thechambers,herlong-sleevedblacktunicwaswithoutanyadornmentandended
attheknees,justabovetightlylacedboots.Thewingedmaskwaspaintedonto
herfaceoncemore,thistimeinblack.Thecontrasttoherpaleeyeswas
startling.
“Goodevening.”Millicent
clappedherhandstogetherasthreeHandmaidensenteredbehindher.Theywere
dressedsimilarly,buttheyworeloosecowlsthatcoveredtheirheadsandtheir
mouths,leavingonlytheirpaintedmasksvisible.Twoofthemhadthosenearlycolorless
blueeyes.Onehadbrown.Somethingstruckmethen.Itwaspossiblethatnot
allHandmaidenswereRevenants,butitwasclearthatnotallhadthosepale
blueeyes.Mymother…she’dhadbrowneyes.
“Gladtoseeyouupandmoving
about.”MillicenttippedherheadatKieran,andherhaircaughtmyattention.
Itwasaflat,midnight-black,butitlooked…patchyandfadedinareas.“Toldyou
she’dberightasraininadayortwo…andahalf.”
Ipushedoffthewardrobe,
immediatelyreachingouttoreadher.Mysensesbrushedagainstawall,sending
aflareofannoyancethroughme.Shewasblockingme.“Whatwasthattoxin?”
“Somethingscrapedfromthe
insidesofsomecreature.”Oneshoulderrose.“Itwould’vekilledanAtlantian.
Definitelyamortal.Onlyoneguardcarriedthosearrows.Youknow,asan
insurancepolicyincaseyouwantedtocontinueonyourgodlyHarbingerofDoom
warpath.”
“Ifyoucontinuecallingmea
Harbinger,Iwilllikelyrestartthatgodlywarpath.”
Millicentlaughed,butthesound
wasnothingliketheoneontheroad.Itrangfalsely.“Iwouldstronglyadvise
againstthat.Everyoneisonedgerightnow,especiallyafterthemissivetheCrown
received.”
“Whatmissive?”
“TheCrowngotwordthatNewHaven
andWhitebridgehavefallenunderAtlantiancontrol,”shetoldus.“Andwe
expectThreeRiverstobeseizedatanymoment.”
Vonettaandthegeneralswere
rightonschedule.Ismiled.
TheHandmaiden’slipsmimicked
mine.“TheQueenrequestsyourpresence.”
Mysmiledisappeared.
“Hotwaterisbeingbroughtto
yourbathingchamber,”Millicentannouncedasshecrossedthebedchamberand
droppedintothechairbythebed.“Onceyou’representable,youwillbe
escortedtoher.”
“Wewillbeescortedto
her,”Kierancorrected.
“Ifthat’swhatmakesyouhappy,
thenbyallmeans,pleasefeelfreetojoinyourmuchbelovedQueen.”She
liftedahalf-glovedhand.AnotherHandmaidenentered.Aswathofwhitelay
acrossonearmassheheadedtothewardrobe.
“Youcanstoprightthere,”I
said.“I’mnotwearingthat.”
TheHandmaidenhalted,looking
atMillicent,whohadreadjustedherselfsohershoulderswereontheseat,and
herlegsagainstthebackofthechair,crossedattheankles.Herheadhung
offtheedgeoftheseat,andIreallyhadnoideawhyshewassittinglike
thatorhowshe’dgottenintothatpositionwithinseconds.Shegavemean
upside-downfrown.“Andwhynot?”
“Shewantstoputmeinthe
whiteoftheMaiden.”Istaredatthegown.“Idon’tcarewhatherreasonsare,
butshewillneverhaveasayinwhatIwearagain.”
Thosepaleeyeswatchedmefrom
behindthepaintedmask.“Butthat’stheonlygownIwasgiven.”
“Notmyproblem.”
“It’snotmineeither.”
IfacedtheHandmaiden.“Your
nameisMillicent?”
“LasttimeIchecked.”
Myspinestraightened.“Ineed
youtounderstandsomething,Millicent.Ifshewantsmetocometo
her,youwillfindmeclothingthatisnotwhite.OrIwillgotoherasIam.”
“Youhavedirtandbloodandthe
godsonlyknowwhatelseonyou,”shepointedout.“Perhapsyou’veforgotten,
butyourmotherhasathingforcleanliness.”
“Donotrefertoherasmy
mother.”EathervibratedinmychestasIsteppedtowardtheHandmaiden.“That
isnotwhosheistome.”
Millicentsaidnothing.
“Eitheryoufindmesomethingelse
towear,orIgolikethis,”Irepeated.“Andifthatisunsuitable,Iwillgo
toherwithnothingbuttheskinIwasbornin.”
“Really?”Shedrewouttheword.
“Really.”
“Thatwouldalmostbeworth
lettingyoudo,justtoseethelookonherface.”Millicentwasstillforseveral
secondsandthenkickedherheelsoffthebackofthechair.Icrossedmyarms
asshehalf-rolled,half-flippedoutofthechairontoherfeet.Shepivotedtoward
me,theflat,patchyhairhalfinherface.“Thenitismyproblem.”
“Yep.”
Millicentexhaledloudly.“I
don’tgetpaidenoughforthis.”ShegrabbedthegownfromtheotherHandmaiden.
“Actually,Idon’tgetpaidatall,soit’sevenworse.”
“Fuckingweird,”Kieranmuttered
underhisbreathaswewatchedher…flouncefromthechamber.
TheotherHandmaidensremained,
stillandsilent,theirfeaturesobscuredbytheirpaintedmasks.HowhadI
forgottenaboutthem?Isuppressedashudderatthememoryofthemmoving
silentlythroughthehalls.Andmymother,theonlywomanIknewasone,had
beenoneofthem?
“Doyouallhavenames?”Kieran
asked,watchingthemclosely.Silencegreetedhim.“Thoughts?Opinions?
Anything?”
Nothing.
Theydidn’tevenblinkastheystood
therebetweenusandtheopendoors.Iletmysensesreachthem.Ifoundwalls
similartoMillicent’s,andinmymind,Ipicturedtinycracksinthose
shields.Justlittlefissuresthatfilledwithsilvery-whitelight.Isqueezed
throughtheopenings,feeling—
OneoftheHandmaidensgavea
littlejerkasItastedsomethingairyandlikespongecake.Peace.
Surprised,Ipulledoutandalmosttookastepback.Howintheworldcould
theyfeelpeace?ThatwasnothinglikewhatI’dpickeduponfromMillicent.
“Makesyouwonderwhytheother
oneissotalkative,”Kieranobserved.“Andthesearen’t.”
“BecauseIdon’tthinkshe’sentirely
likethem.Isshe?”IaskedtheHandmaidensasKieransentmeaquickglance.
“She’sdifferent.”
“Inwaysotherthantheobvious?”
Kierandrawled.
“Shedoesn’tsmelllikethem.”
Kieran’sbrowspinchedasheturned
backtotheotherHandmaidens.“You’reright.”
Millicentreturnedshortlyafter
that,carryinggarmentsasblackastheonesshewore.ShestompedpastKieran
andme,droppingtheclothingontothebed.“ThisisthebestIcouldmanage.”
Turningtome,sheplantedherhandsonherhips.“Ihopethismakesyouhappy
becauseitwillsurelyannoyher.”
“DoIlooklikeIcareifshe’s
annoyed?”
“Youdon’t.”Shepaused.“Right
now.”Achillsweptdownmyspineasshewenttothechairandsat,crossing
onelegovertheother.“Youshouldgetready.I’llkeepyour…mancompany.”
“Great,”Kieranmuttered.
“IwanttoseeReaverbeforeImeet
withtheQueen.”
“He’sfine.”
“Iwanttoseehim.”
Herlipsthinnedasshestared
upatme.“Isshealwaysthisdemanding?”
“Whatyoucalldemanding,I
wouldsayisassertingherauthority,”Kieranreplied.
“Well,it’sannoying…and
unexpected.”Herunblinkinggazelatchedontomine.“Shewasn’talwayslike
this.”
“Howwouldyouknow?”Iasked.
“BecauseIrememberyouwhenyou
wereasquietasatinymouse,notmakingasinglesoundunlessitwasnight,
andbaddreamsfoundyouinyoursleep,”shesaid.
Thatchillreturned,oncemoreskating
downmyspine.
“Iwasherethen.Ifeellike
I’vealwaysbeenhere,”shesaidwithasigh.“I’mold,Penellaphe.Almostas
oldasyourKing—”
BeforeIevenrealizedIhad
moved,Iwasinfrontofher,myhandsontopofhers,pressingthemintothearms
ofthechair.“WhereisCasteel?”Iasked,awareofKierancomingupbehindme
astheotherHandmaidenssteppedforward.
WhenMillicentsaidnothing,the
PrimalessencethrobbedinmyveinsasIloweredmyheadsowewereateye
level.“Haveyouseenhim?”Thesmokinessreturnedtomyvoice.
Alongmomentpassed.“Ifyouwant
toseehim,”shesaid,andIalmostmissedit—thequick,dartingglanceshe
sentintheHandmaidens’direction.“Isuggestyougetoutofmyface,getyour
faceready,anddoitquickly.Timeisoftheessence,YourHighness.”
Iheldherstareandthenslowly
backedoff.Snatchingtheclothingfromher,Iwentintothebathingchamber,
quicklywashingintheclean,warmwaterthatsomeonehadbroughtin.Icould
hearMillicentaskingKieranifhewasawolvenandthenherprattlingonabout
howshe’dneverspokentoone.Kierangavelittletonoresponse.
Theclothingappearedtohave
comestraightfromherwardrobe.Thechiton-styletunicwassleevelessandsat
offtheshoulder,restingwherethewoundfromtheshadowstonearrowshould’ve
beeniftheinjuryhadn’talreadyhealed,leavingnotevenamarkbehind.The
bodicewastight,buttheleatherbandsaroundthewaistandhipsallowedmeto
loosenthematerialsoitfitmyfullerfigure.Thehemreachedthekneesand
hadslitsoneitherside,allowingthewolvendaggertoremainhiddenbut
easilyaccessible.Imanagedtosecurethepouchtooneofthebandsatmy
waistandlettheringlaybehindtheneckline,againstmybreasts.She’d
broughtapairofbreechesthatIdidn’tthinkbelongedtoher,buttheyfit,
soIreallycouldn’tcarelesswhothey’dcomefrom.
Imovedtothevanity,myheart
poundingasIstaredatmyreflection.Thesilveryglowbehindmypupilswas
bright,andIthoughttheaurahadgrownalittle.Iblinked.Nochanges.
AsIstoodthere,Ithoughtabout
thedream—thenightmare.My…motherhadsaidsomethingtotheDarkOne.Hewas
herviktor.That’swhyTawnyhadsaiditsoundedsofamiliar.I’d
hearditbefore.Thatnight,andthegodsonlyknewhowmanytimesinthenightmares
Icouldn’tremembersince.Leopold.Myfather.Hewas…hewaslikeVikter.The
breathIexhaledwasalittleragged.
Mygripontheporcelainvanity
tightenedasmygazetrackedoverthescars.TheyhadfadedalittlewhenI
Ascended,buttheyseemedmorenoticeablenowthanever.Ididn’tknowifit
wasthebrightlamplightorjustthemirrorinthiscastle—inthiscity—that
madethemseemsostark.
Myheartcontinuedpoundingasa
mixtureofdreadandanticipationrolledthroughme.Itkeptcominginwaves,
eversinceI’dwokentodiscoverthatwewereinWayfair.Iwashere.Where
Casteelwas.Wheremyfatherwas.WhereIsbethwas.
“I’mnotafraidofher,”I
whisperedtomyreflection.“I’maQueen.I’magod.I’mnotafraidofher.”
Iclosedmyeyes.Inthesilence
ofthechamber,myheartfinallyslowed.Mystomachsettled,andmygripeased
fromthevanity.Withsteadyhands,Ibraidedmystill-damphair.
Icouldn’tbeafraidofher.I
couldn’tbeafraidofanything.Notnow.
Forthefirsttime,thescarsonmyarmsandfacewere
visibleforalltoseeaswedescendedontothemainfloorofWayfairCastle.
Itwasasurrealfeeling.
Millicenthadtakenmetosee
Reaver,andshedidn’tputupmuchofanargumentwhenhefollowedusbackinto
thehall.Thedrakenwasquiet,hisheadbowedandfaceobscuredbyhissheet
ofblondhair,butIknewhemissednothingaswecrossedtheatriumthathad
onceseemedsomuchlargerandsobeautiful.
Asachild,Iusedtofindthe
vinescarvedintothemarblecolumnsandoverlaidingoldtobeappealing.I
wouldtracethedelicateetchingsasfarasIcould,butthedesignstraveled
allthewaytothearchedceilings.IanandIusedtosneakintotheatriumin
themiddleofthedayandcallouttoeachother,listeningtoourvoicesecho
againstthetintedglassabove.
Now,Ifounditallto
be…excessive.Gaudy.Asifallthegoldtrimandartworkweretryingtocover
upthebloodstainsnoonecouldsee.
Butthefactthatitfelt
smallernowcouldhavesomethingtodowiththenumberofpeoplewhoescorted
us.BesidesMillicentandthefourHandmaidens,sixRoyalKnightsflankedus,
andwhatIcouldonlyassumewastheadditionalarrivalofRevenantsbasedon
theirscentandwhatI’dcometolearnwasaneerilysilentwayofwalking.The
vamprysworesimilarneckandfaceclothes,leavingonlytheireyesvisible
belowtheirhelmets.Iwasn’tworriedaboutthem.Iftheytriedsomething,I
couldtakethemout.TheRevenantswouldbeanissue,butwehadReaver.
WeenteredtheHallofGods,where
statuesofthegodslinedeachsideofthecorridor.Iknewexactlywherewe
wereheaded.TheGreatHall.
Vasesoflilacswere
intermingledwithnight-bloomingroses,afavoriteflowerofmine,andsat
betweenthemassivestatues.Noneofthegods’faceshadbeencapturedinany
detailinthestatues.Theywerejustsmoothstone,turnedupwardtothe
pitchedceilings.ThiswasanotherplacewhereIanandIwouldplay,racingin
andoutofthestatuesonemomentandthensittingatthefeetofthemthenext
asIanmadeupgrandadventuresforthegodstotakepartin.
MychesttightenedasIlooked
aheadtothesmaller,domedatrium,whereonlytwostatuesstood,bothchiseled
fromrubies.
TheKingandQueenofSolis.
“Tacky,”Kieranmutteredupon
seeingthem.
Millicentstoppedinfrontof
us,andtoourright,IsawtwoRoyalGuardsstationedoutsideasetofred-painted
doors.Theguardsopenedthem,andsoundrushedoutfromthesideentranceof
theGreatHall—murmursandlaughter,cries,andshoutsofblessing.
Millicentlookedoverhershoulder,
placingherfingertoherrosy-coloredlipsbeforeenteringtheGreatHall.The
Handmaidensdidn’tfollow.Theysteppedtothesides,leavingapathforusas
MillicentwalkedoutontothealcoveIrememberedcirclingtheentireGreat
Hall.
Pressingmypalmagainstthe
pouch,Ijoinedher.Ididn’ttakeinthecrowdbelowortheAscendedthat
filledtheothersectionsofthealcove.Myattentionwentstraighttothe
raiseddais—itswidthandlengththesizeofmosthomes.Thethroneswerenewer
versions,stilldiamond-and-ruby-encrusted,buttheirbacksnolongerborethe
RoyalCrest.Theywerenowshapedtoresembleacrescentmoon.Andbothwere
empty.
Butnotforlong.
Behindthethrones,Handmaidens
partedcrimsonbanners,andtheGreatHallfellsilent.Notasinglewordwas
uttered.Chairmeningoldrobesappeared,theirholdonthewoodenrailsfirm
astheywalkedout,carryingacagedlitter,onethatremindedmeofagilded
birdcage.MybrowsliftedasItookintheredsilkwrappedaroundeachbar,
andthegauzylayersofcurtainsonthesedanchair,obscuringwhosatinside.
“Youhavegottobefuckingkidding
me,”Kieranmutteredasthechairmenloweredthelittertothefloor.
Icouldn’trespondasthe
Handmaidenspulledthecurtainsaside,andtheBloodQueensteppedoutfromthe
gildedlitter.Cheerserupted,andthunderousapplauseechoedoffthebanner-covered
wallsandtheglass-domedceiling.
Everypartofmybeingfocused
onherasshecrossedthedais,garbedinwhite—awhitegownthatcoveredall
butherhandsandface.Thecrown’sdiamondspiresatopeachrubyhoopconnected
bypolishedonyxdazzledandtaunted.Herdarkhairshoneauburnintheglowof
thenumeroussconcesliningthedozensofcolumnsholdingthealcovefloorsand
framingthedais.EvenfromwhereIstood,Isawthathereyeswereheavily
outlinedinblack,andherlipswereaglossy,berryhue.
Theessencetwistedand
tightenedinsidemeasIplacedmyhandsontherailingwhileshesatonthe
throne,herheadtiltingasshebaskedinthereception.Ittook
everythinginmenottotapintotheroaringpowerfillingmyveinsandlash
outather,righthere,rightnow.Myfingerscurledintothestone,pressing
intothegoldenscrollworkthatswirledovertherailings,thecolumns,across
thefloor,andalongthevisiblesectionsofthewalls.
“Sonofabitch,”Kieransnarled
frommyotherside.
Itoremyattentionfromthe
BloodQueentothedarkmanwho’djoinedher,standingtoherleft.Mybreath
scorchedmylungs.Golden-bronzeskin.Brownhairtouchedbystreaksofsunand
pulledbackfromuncannilyfamiliarfeatures.Highcheekbones.Fullmouth.A
hardjawline.
“Malik,”Iwhispered.
Thebitternessofangergrewin
thebackofmythroat,tingedbytangyanguish.Iliftedahand,placingiton
theonebesidemine.KierangrippedthestonejustastightlyasIhad.I
closeddownmysorrowandfury,channelingabitofwarmthand…andhappiness.
Atremorwentthroughhim,andundermypalm,thetendonsofhishandrelaxed
“PrinceMalik,”
Millicentcorrectedsoftly.“Yourbrother-in-law.”
Myheadcuttoher.Shewas
lookingatMalik.Ascloseaswestood,Isawtinyspotsacrosshercheeks
beneaththepaintedmask.Freckles.IsqueezedKieran’shand.Shewatchedthe
Princemuchlikehe’dwatchedherinOakAmbler,jawtightandmotionless.
Reaverpassedbehindher,the
musclesinhisbicepsandforearmtaut.Hedidn’tappeartobebotheredby
thoseinthealcove—theAscendedintheirfancysilkgownsandglittering
jewels.Thoughtheyweredefinitelylookingatuswithcurious,midnighteyes.
No,itwasthemassivestatueof
thePrimalofLifethathadgarneredthedraken’sattention.
Itstoodinthecenterofthe
GreatHall,chiseledfromthepalestmarble.LiketheotherstatuesintheHall
ofGods,nothingbutsmoothstoneappearedwherethefaceshouldbe,butthe
detailelsewherewasstrikingandhadn’tfadedintheyearssinceI’dlastseen
it—notfromtheheavy-soledcaligaeorthearmoredplatingshieldingthelegs
andchest.Heheldaspearinonehandandashieldintheother.
Themortalsgavethestatueand
theblackpetals,pulledfromnight-bloomingrosesandscatteredaroundhis
stonefeet,awideberth.
“IdoubtNyktoswouldbepleased
toknowhisstatueremainshere,”Imurmured
“ThatisnotastatueofNyktos.”
Reaver’swordswerealowrumble.
“He’sright,”Millicentadded.
ThecrowdquietedbeforeIcould
askwhatthey’dmeant,andthenshespoke.“Mypeople,howyouhonorme.”
Hervoice.
Myinsideswentcoldatthesoft,
warmtonethatwassoatoddswithherspecialbrandofcruelty.
“Howyouhumbleme,”shesaid,
andmyfingersreturnedtopressingintotherailing.Humble?Ialmostscream-laughed.
“Evenintimesofsuchuncertaintyandfear,yourfaithinmehasnever
wavered.”
Kieranslowlyturnedhisheadto
me.
“Iknow,”Imuttered.
“Andforthat,Iwillnotwaver.
Andneitherwillthegods.NotinthefaceofagodlesskingdomortheHarbinger.”
Chapter24
ThelowsoundofhissingrolledacrosstheGreatHall’s
floorandthroughthealcove,comingfrommortalsandAscendedalike.Theback
ofmynecktensedasKieranandReaverstiffened.
“‘TheHarbingerandthe
BringerofDeathandDestructiontothelandsgiftedbythegods,’has
awakened,”theBloodQueensaid,andthehissingceased.Silencegreetedher
words—silenceandmyrisingdisbelief.“Itistrue,therumorsyou’veheard
aboutourcitiestothenorthandeast.Theyhavefallen.TheirRisestorn
down.Theinnocentrapedandslaughtered,fedfromandcursed.”
I…Icouldn’tbelievewhatIwas
hearing.Stunned,mygazesweptoutoverthecrowd—overthepalefacesas
bitterfearscrapedagainstmyshields.WhatIdreadedwastrue.Theprophecy
wasnolongerabarelyknownclusterofwordsbutaweapon.
Anexpertlywieldedonethatwas
nothingbuthorrificlies.Liesthatweresoldandboughtwithouthesitationor
question.Liesthathadalreadybecometruth.
Eatherburnedfromthecenterof
mychestasmygriptightenedontherailing.Angerpumpedthroughmyveins.
“Andthoseleftalive,now
captivestobarbaricrulerswhohavespentcenturiesplottingagainstus.The
godsweepforus.”Sheleanedforwardonthethrone,spinestraightasmore
liesspilledfromherberry-huedlips.“OurenemywantstoendthegloriousRite—our
honorableservicetothegods.”
Thehissingcameagain,asdid
criesofdenial.
“Iknow.Iknow,”theBlood
Queencooed.“Butdonotfear.Wewillnotcavetothem.Wewillnotsubmitto
thehorrortheyhaveawakened,willwe?”
Theshoutswereevenloudernow,
aboomaspowerfulasanyblastofthunder.Kieranslowlyshookhishead,and
myskinstartedtohum.
“Wewillnotliveinfearof
Atlantia.WewillnotliveinfearoftheHarbingerofDeathandDestruction.”
TheBloodQueen’svoicevibratedastheessencedidinsideofme.“Thegods
havenotabandonedus,andbecauseofthat,becauseofyourfaithinthe
Ascended,inme,theyneverwill.Youwillbespared.That,Ipromise.Andwe
willhaverevengeagainstwhathasbeendonetoyourKing.Thegodswillseeto
it.”
Asthepeopleroaredtheir
supportinafalsegod,thePrimaleatherswelledandpressedagainstmyskin.
Undermyhands,Ifeltatremorintherailing.
Millicentlookeddownandthen
tookasmallstepback.Sheturnedherheadtomeandleanedin.“Calm
yourself,”shewarned.“Unlessyouwishtoalertthepeopletothefactthat
theHarbingerisamongthem.”
Mygazeshottohers.“I’mnot
theHarbinger.”
“You’renot.”Shesentapointed
glanceattherailing.
Tothefaintcracksbeginningto
appearinthemarble.
“Poppy.”Kierantouchedmyback
asReaversteppedincloser.“Ihatetoagreewithher,butnowwouldnotbe
thetimetodoanythingrash—nomatterhowjustified.”
“I’mthinkingnowisasgooda
timeasany,”Reavercommented.
IhadtoagreewithReaver,but
IhadnoknowledgeofwhereCasteelwasbeingheld.Noknowledgeofmyfather’s
whereabouts.TheBloodQueenmayberightbeforeme,butthatdidn’tmean
eitherwaslocatedsomewheresafe.IfIlashedoutather,someoneelsecould
strikeagainstthem.
Andthiswasn’tjustaboutthem
orme.ItwasaboutthepeopleonthefloorwhoalreadybelievedIwasthis
monster—theHarbinger.IfIdidanythingrightnow,itwouldundoeverything
beingdonetofreethem.
AshudderwentthroughmeasI
pushedtheessencedown.Ittookacoupleofmoments,butIfeltKieranrelax,
andMillicentturnbacktotheGreatHall.Eventually,Ibecameawareofwhat
washappening.TheBloodQueenwasspeaking.
“Youmaycomeforward,”shesaid.
“Whatinthehellisthis?”
Kieranmuttered.
Slippingmyhandfromhis,I
lookeddowntoseeafrailyoungwomandressedinabeigegownthathungfrom
sunkenshoulders.Anoldercoupleaidedher,allthreeunderthewatchful
staresoftheknightsstandingoneithersideofthewide,curveddaissteps.
Theyoungwomanreachedthetop,andthecouplehelpedhertoherknees.She
liftedashakingarm—
TheBloodQueenextendedhers,
foldingherpale,steadyhandsaroundthemuchsmaller,tremblingone.Onlyone
ringadornedherfingers—apinkdiamondthatglitteredunderthelight.I’dshut
downmysenses,butthemomenttheBloodQueenbowedherhead,theyoungwoman’s
joyburstthroughmyshields,sweetandsmooth.
Andmystomachturned.“It’sthe
RoyalBlessing.Ididn’tknowshewasstilldoingthis.”
“DoIevenwanttoknowwhat
thatissupposedtobe?”Kieranasked.
“Mortalsbelievethatthetouch
ofaRoyalhashealingproperties,”Itoldhim.Tearsranfreelydownthe
woman’scheeks.Mystomachcontinuedtochurn.“Irememberthemliningupfordays
togetachancetoreceivetheBlessing.”
“Theystilldo,”Millicent
remarked.
“Iusedtobelieveit.TheBlessing
seemedtoworksometimes.Ididn’tknowhow.Ifitwasjustthepowerofthe
mindoverthebodyor…”IwatchedtheBloodQueentakeagoldchalicefromanearby
Handmaidenandliftittothewoman’slips.Isbethsmiledwarmly,andwhenshe
did,sheactuallylookedlovingandcaringasshetippedthechalice,allowing
thewomantosip.Myeyesnarrowed.“Orifit’swhat’sinthatcupshehasthem
drinkfrom.”
Kieranslowlyturnedhisheadto
me.“Blood?Atlantianblood?”
Ithadtobe.
“Gods,”hegrowled.“Itwouldn’t
healsomeonesufferingfromsomesortofterminalillness,butitcouldgivethem
areprieve.Itcouldworklongenoughtoconvincethemortalsthatthegodshad
blessedtheBloodCrown.Thattheirtouchcouldheal.ThattheyandalltheAscended
hadbeenChosen.”
Andithad.
Afterafewmoments,thewoman’s
coloringimproved.Herfeaturesnolongerappearedsogaunt.Andthen…shestood
onherown.Hermovementswerejerky,butshestood
Cheerseruptedfromthemortals
packingtheflooroftheGreatHall.Manydroppedtotheirknees,tears
streamingdowntheirfacesastheyclaspedhandsinprayerandgratitude.And
theBloodQueenliftedherchin—raisedthosedarkeyestothealcove.
Tome.
Andshesmiled.
“Idon’tlikehowtheystareatyou.”Reaver’svoicerumbled
justaboveawhisper,sweptawaybythehumofconversationandthesoftstrings
ofmusicdriftingtothehighceilingofthereceivingchamberwe’dbeen
broughttoaftertheRoyalBlessinghadended.
“Foronce,Icanagreewith
you,”Kierandrawledfrommyotherside.
Wealthymortalsweren’ttheonly
onesinattendance,standingingroupsorsprawledacrossthick,crimson
settees,theirfingersandnecksdrippingwithcostlyjewels,andtheirstomachs
fullofthetreatsservedbysilentservants.
TheAscendedsurroundedus.
LordsandLadiesexistedamong
theotherslikeemptyvoids,theirjewelslarger,theirstaresdarker,andtheir
stomachslikelyfullofadifferentkindoftreat.
Themortalskeptstealing
curiousglancesinourdirection,theirstareslingeringonthetwobesideme
forreasonsthathadnothingtodowithwhytheylookeduponme.Theywere
rathercovertaboutit.Meanwhile,theAscendedgawkedopenly.
“Theystarebecausetheyfind
youtwoappealingtolookupon.TheystareatmebecauseI’mflawed,”Itoldthem.
“AndtheycannotfigureoutwhyIwouldbeamongthem.”
“Whatthehell?”Reaver
muttered,frowning.
“ThemortaleliteofSolismimic
theRoyals,andtheAscendedcovetallthingsbeautiful.Lookatthem,”I
advised.“They’reallperfectinonewayoranother.Beautiful.”
Reaverscowled.“That’sthestupidest
godsdamnthingI’veheardinawhile,andI’veheardalotofstupid.”
Ishrugged,alittlesurprised
bythefactthatIwasn’tbothered.Theideaofanyofthemseeingthescarshad
oncebeenmortifyingtoconsider,eventhoughIhadalwaysbeenproudof
them—ofwhatIhadsurvived.ButIhadbeenadifferentpersonthen—someonewho
caredabouttheopinionsofthewealthyandtheRoyals.
Icouldn’tcarelessnow.
Mygazeflickedtowherethe
RoyalGuardsstoodattheentrance.Theytoowatched,asdidtheHandmaidens.
Millicenthaddisappearedtothegodsonlyknewwhere.Timewasoftheessence,
she’dsaid,anditwas.Theeatherpulsedinmychest.Iwasgrowingveryimpatient.
TheBloodQueenknewIwashere,
andshekeptmewaiting.Itwasasillypowermove.She’dputmeinthis
chamberbecauseshebelievedIwouldbehavemyselfamongsomanymortals.
Mortalswhohadnoideaagod
wasamongthem.
Theurgetochangethatwashard
toresist.Itouchedtheringthroughmytunic.IfIhadlearnedanything,it
wasthatmyactionscouldhaveunintendedconsequences.Onesthatwouldn’tonly
endwithsomeonebeingharmedbutcouldfurtherbrandmeastheHarbinger.So,
Iwaited.Impatiently.AndwhileIdid,Iwatchedtheknights.About
halfofthemstoodwiththeunnaturalstiffnessoftheHandmaidens.Theirchests
didn’tmovetoomuch.Theydidn’ttwitchorshift.Theyrarelyblinked.
“IthinkthereareRevenants
amongtheRoyalGuards,”Iquietlysaid.
“Wouldmakesense,”Kieran
observed.“Lesseasytopickoutthanhavingthemrunaroundinredrobes.”
Finally,theguardsstepped
asideandopenedornategolddoors.TwoHandmaidensenteredfirst,theircowls
inplace,coveringtheirhairandcastingtheirpaintedfacesinshadows.The
BloodQueenwalkedinbehindthem,stilldressedinwhite.
Iloweredmyhandstomysides.
AngerpulsedsofuriouslythroughmethatItrulybelievedIdeservedsomesort
ofrecognitionfornotunleashingmyragerightthere.Forjuststandingstill
asthemortalsandAscendedbowedtoher.Thethreeofusdidnosuchthing,
andthatdidn’tgounnoticed.Shockfelllikeicyrainfromthemortalsasthey
rose.Whisperswhirledthroughthechamberasthesmallorchestracontinued
playingfromtheircorner.
Kieranstiffenedbesideme,and
myattentionbrieflyshiftedtothemanwho’denteredbehindIsbeth.
Malik.
Iletmysensesstretchtohim,
andlikebefore,Ihitshieldsasthickashisfather’s.
TheBloodQueendriftedthrough
thecrowd,dolingoutprettysmilesandbriefembraces.Herdiamondandruby
crownglitteredunderthebrightchandelierassheturnedherheadtowardme,
andherstaremetmine.
Myheartdidn’tpound.
Mypulsedidn’tspeedup.
Myhandsandbodyweresteady.
Therewasnofearoranxiety.I
wasn’tnothing.Iwasjusticy,bankedragewhichhadinfiltratedeverycellof
mybeingasshecrossedthechamber,thehemofhergowntrailingbehindher.
Inotherwords,Iwasrathercalm.
Iheldherstareasthecowled
HandmaidensfollowedherandMalik.Theguardshadmoved,takingupstations
everysomanyfeet,creatingastaggeredwallbetweenusandthosein
attendance.
Isbethstoppedamerefootfrom
me,thatwarmandcaringsmilestilluponherberry-redlips.Those
darkbutnotendlesseyesflickeredovermyattire.“Thisisn’twhatIsentyou
towear.”
FuryblastedoffKieran,sohot
andintenseIwouldn’thavebeensurprisedifithadignitedafire.ButI…I
wasnothingbutthatcoldrage.“Iknow.”
Isawaslighttighteningatthe
cornersofherlipsashereyesrosetomine.“Whatyouwearisn’tbefittingof
aQueen.”
“WhatIwearwillbemychoice.
WhatbefitsaQueen,Iwilldecide.”
“Nowthatwassaidlike
aQueen,”shereplied.“Unlikethelasttimewespoke.”
“Alotofthingshavechangedsince
then.”
“Havethey?”
“Yes.Startingwiththefact
thatyouruleoverseveralcitieslessthanyoudidlasttime,”Ianswered.
“Isthatso?”TheBloodQueenlifted
ahand.Thepinkdiamondglitteredasshesnappedherfingers.“Whatwaslost
yesterdaycaneasilyberegainedtomorrow.”
Mylipstwistedintoathin
smile.“Ineverthoughtyoutobeafool.”
Hereyessharpenedonme.“I
wouldhopenot.”
“Butyoumustbeoneifyouthink
youwilleasilygainanythingyouhavelost,”Itoldher,awarethatweheld
theraptattentionoftheAscendedandmortalsalike.Theycouldn’tgetclose
enoughtohearus,though.TheguardsandHandmaidenspreventedthat.
“Hmm,”shemurmured,takinga
glassofwhatappearedtobechampagnefromaservantwho’darrived.“Wouldyou
likeadrink?Anyofyou?”
Wedidn’ttakeheruponthe
offer,butMalikdid,drawingKieran’sattention.“Youlookwell,Prince
Malik.”
Thathalf-smilethathintedata
lonedimpleinhisleftcheeksurfacedashetookasipofhischampagne,saying
nothing.
IsbetheyedKieran.“Andyou
lookasscrumptiousasyoudidthelasttime.”
Kieran’slipcurled.“IthinkI
willvomitnow.”
“Adorable.”Unbothered,she
lookedatReaver,herdelicate,darkbrowslifting.“You,Idonotrecognize.”
Reaverstaredback,unflinching.
“Youwouldn’t.”
“Interesting.”Shegavehimthe
once-overfromabovetherimofherslenderflute.“Tellme,daughter,haveyou
beenabletoresisttheamplecharmsofthemenyousurroundyourselfwith?”
“I’mnotevengoingtodignifythat
witharesponse,”Ireplied,andMalik’sgrindeepened.
“Smartmove.”Shewinked,andmy
stomachturned.“Bytheway,youarewrong.”
“About?”
“Beingunabletoeasilyreclaim
whatI’velost,”shesaid,liftingherchin.“Ihaveyou.”
Anicyshiverofangerswirled
downmyspine.“YouonlyhavemypresencebecauseI’veallowedthat.”
“Ah,yes.Youagreedto
come.Myapologies.”Shesteppedincloser,andbothKieranandReavertensed.
Ididnot.“Didyoureallythinkyouwouldbeabletosneakinhereandfreehim?
Comenow,Penellaphe.Thatwasfoolish.”
Myinsidesburnedfromhowcold
Ifelt.“ButI’mherenow,aren’tI?”
“Youare,andIamglad.”Her
gazesearchedmine.“Wehavesomuchtodiscuss.”
“Theonlythingwehaveto
discussisCasteel’srelease.”
Shetookanothersip.“Doyou
rememberwhathappenedthelasttimeyoumadedemands?”
Iignoredthat.“Andtherelease
ofmyfather.”
TheBloodQueenloweredher
glassasthestrikinglinesofherfeaturestensed.“Yourfather?”
“Iknowwhoheis.Iknowyouhave
him.Iwantbothofthem.”
“Someone’sbeentalking,”she
murmured.“YourfatherandyourKingarewell.Safewheretheyare.”
Safe?Ialmostlaughed.“Iwant
toseethem.”
“Youhaven’tearnedthat,”she
replied.
Earned?Theessencepressedagainst
myskin,threateningtheicycalm.“DothepeopleinthisroomknowwhoIam?”
Acuriouslooksettledintoher
features.“OnlyafewinmyCourtknowyou’remydaughter.”
Isteppedforward,andthe
Handmaidensmoved.Isbethheldupherhand.“I’mnottalkingaboutthat.Do
theyknowI’magodandnotthisHarbingeryouspeakof?”
Shesaidnothing.
“Whatdoyouthinkwillhappen
ifIrevealthat?”Iasked.“Whatwould’vehappenedifI’ddonesoduringyour
farceofaspeechandtheRoyalBlessing?”
“Betteryet,whatdoyou
thinkwillhappenifyoudo?”Isbethcountered.“Doyouthinktheywilldropto
theirkneesandpraiseyou?Welcomeyou?Thattheywillnolongerseeyouas
theHarbingerthegodswarnedabout?”
“Thegodswarnedofnosuch
thing,”Isaid.“Andyouknowthat.”
“What,mydear,doyouthinka
prophecyspokenbyagodtobe,otherthanawarningspokenbyagod?”Isbeth
countered.
Mynostrilsflared.“I’mnotthe
Harbinger.”
Shesmiledashergazeswept
overmyface.“Mysweetchild,Iseeonethinghasn’tchanged.”
“Myrampantdislikeofyou?”
Isbethlaughedsoftly.“Youstill
haven’tacceptedwhoandwhatyouare.”
“IknowexactlywhoandwhatIam,”
Isaid,ignoringthesuddenburstofdread—ofunease.“Andsoon,allthoseyou
haveliedtowillknowthetruth.Iwillmakesureofit.”
“Again,whatdoyouexpectof
thepeople,YourHighness?”Malikasked.“Forthemtoturntheirbacksonher?
Whensheisalltheyknowandtrust?YouwereaMaidentheybelieveeitherdead
orchanged.Astrangerfromakingdomtheyfear.”
“Shutup,”Kierangrowled.
“I’monlyspeakingthetruth,”
Malikresponded.“Theywillfearher.”
“Insteadoffearingthefalse
godinfrontofthem?Ademiswhohasstolentheessenceofalong-forgotten
PrimalandusedittokilltheKingofGods’guards?Whosanctionedtheslaughter
ofcountlesschildrenintheso-called,honorableRite?”Iarchedabrowat
Isbeth.Hereyesnarrowedslightly.“Iwonderhowtheywillfeeltolearnthat
notevenyournameisreal.”Ilaughedsoftly.“Fake,justliketheBlessing.
JustliketheRiteandeverythingthatmakesuptheBloodCrown.False,just
likethegodyoubelieveyouare.”
“Careful,”Isbethwarned.
“WhatabouttheotherAscended?”
Ipushed.“Thosewhoaren’tfavoredbyyou?Whatdoyouthinktheywilldoif
theylearnyou’renotoneofthem?Shouldwefindout?”
Shestaredatme,herglass
forgotteninherhandasMalikedgedintoourspace.“Iwouldn’tsuggestdoing
anythingsoreckless,YourHighness,”hesaidtome,placinghishandonthe
BloodQueen’sarm.“Youmaybetheonetowalkoutofwhatevercatastropheyou
create,butmanyofthoseinthisroomandbeyondwon’t.Isthatwhatyou
want?”
Istaredathishand,momentarily
stunned.Disgustbuiltinsideme,joiningthecoldanger.“Howcanyoueven
touchher?”
Malikliftedashoulder.“How
canInot?”
“Youfuckingbastard,”Kieran
snarled,steppingforward.
IgrabbedKieran’sarm,stopping
him,somehowbecomingtherationalone.
ThePrinceeyedKieran.“It’s
beenawhilesincewewerearoundeachotherforanyamountoftime,soI’lllet
thatslide.You’veapparentlyforgottenIcankickyourassfromhereto
Atlantiawithoutbreakingasweat.”
Kieran’swintryeyesbrightened.
“Ihaven’tforgottenshit.”
“Good.”Maliksmiled.“Nowyou
knowthathasn’tchanged.”
MyeyescuttoMalik,tothat
bored,indifferentsmile,andIletmysensesreachouttohimagain.Ibrushed
againstthosethickshields,andthistime,Ididn’tpullback.Ididn’tstop
thedarkurgetofindthosevulnerablespots.Ilettheessencefollowmy
senses,letthepowergentlywashoverthosewalls,discoveringthecracks.
Malik’sgazesnappedtomine,
andthatlazysmileofhisfroze.Ididn’tstopmyself.Isanktheeatherinto
thosementalwalls,digginginwithclaws,intothosetinysliversofweakness.
BlooddrainedrapidlyfromthePrince’sfaceasItorethosefissureswide.The
glassslippedfromhisfingersasIshatteredhisshields.
Emotionspouredout,rawand
unfettered,asMalikstumbledtotheside—awild,spiralingmixthatwasalmost
toofastandtoochaotictomakesenseof.Almost.Icaughtthesugary
residueoffleetingamusementandpooling,acidicanger.Malikshuddered,bending
atthewaistashisfingersdugintohishair.TheHandmaidenssteppedin,
blockinghimfromtheviewofothersasIcontinuedtopullhisemotions
fromhim.Itastedhintsofsournessandtarttanginess.Equalpartsshameand
sorrow,butitwasthedagger-sharpbitternessthatoverpoweredeverything
else.Fearthathadgrownintoanever-presentpanic.
Ipulledbackthen,recoiling
fromtheholesnowleftinhisshields.Heliftedhishead.Bloodtrickledfrom
hisnose.Hisstingingpaineasedoff,becomingadull,throbbingacheashe
staredatme.
“Gethimoutofhere,”Isbeth
orderedinaclippedvoice.Twoguardssteppedforward.Oneofthemtookholdof
hisarm.
Malikshookthemoff.“I’m
fine,”herasped,buthedidn’tfightthemwhentheyturnedhim.Whenhewalked
off,hisstepswereshaky.
“Andsomeonecleanupthis
mess,”shesnapped,herdarkeyesflashingwithahintofeather.“Thatwasnot
kindofyou,daughter.Heis,afterall,yourbrother-in-law.”
“Hehaditcoming,”Kieransaid
withasmirk.
“Maybe.”Isbethsteppedtothe
sideasaservanthastilycleaneduptheshatteredglass.Shetookadeep
breath,andthefaintglowfadedfromhereyes.Thestrainlefthermouth.“As
Iwassaying,thereismuchtobediscussed.Thiswar.Thekingdoms.TheTrue
King.ThatiswhyIallowedyoutoenterthecapital.”
StillrattledbyMalik’s
emotions,Isaid,“Youwanttohaveadiscussion?That’snotgoingtohappen
untilyoureleaseCasteelandmyfather.”
TheBloodQueen’slaughwaslike
windchimes.“Mydarling,thinkofwhatyou’reasking.Youwantmetogiveupleverage—the
onlythingthatkeepsyoufromdoingsomethingincrediblyrecklessandfoolish?
Somethingyou’dregret?Youshouldthankme.”
Idrewback.“Thankyou?
Areyououtofyour—?”
“Youaremydaughter,
Penellaphe.”Herhandsnappedout,curlingaroundmychin.Thistime,Iwarned
KieranandReaveroffwitharaisedhand.Herholdwasn’tpainful.Hertouch
wasn’twarm,butitwasn’tcoldlikeanAscended’s.“Icarriedyouinmywomb
andcaredforyouuntilitwasnolongersafeformetodoso.ThatiswhyI
toleratefromyouwhatIwouldnotallowfromothers.”Hereyesflashedonce
more.“ThatiswhyIwillgiveyou—onlyyou—whatyouhaven’tevenbegun
toearn.Butyoumustmakeachoice.YoueitherseeyourKingoryourfather.
Notboth.”
“Iwantboth.”
“That’snotanoption,
Penellaphe.”Hereyesboredintomine.“Andsoon,neitherwillbe.So,make
yourchoiceanddosoquickly.”
Istiffened,handscurlinginto
fists.“Casteel,”Iforcedout,andguiltchurned,borderingonshame.Myfather
wasimportant,butIcouldn’tchoosedifferently.
Isbethsmiled.Shehadknownwho
Iwouldpick.Shedroppedmychin.“IwillletyouseeyourpreciousKing,and
thenyouandIwilltalk.Andyouwilllisten.”
“YourHighness.”Themaleinfrontofmebowedatthe
waist.HehadtobetheRevenantKieranhadspokenabout.Callum.Everything
abouthimwasgolden—hishair,skin,clothing,andthewingedmaskpaintedon
hisface.Everythingexcepthiseyes.Theywerethesamemilkyblueas
Millicent’s.She’dresurfacedwhentheyledusoutofthechamber,alongwitha
lesspalebutnot-so-smugMalik.
FromwhatIcouldsee,the
Revenantwashandsome,thecurveofhischinandcheeksalmostdelicate.Oddly
enough,heremindedmeofoneoftheporcelaindollsstowedawayinthe
wardrobe.
“Itisanhonortofinallymeet
you,”Callumsaid,straightening.
Idoubteditwasanhonor,soI
saidnothing.
Callumsmiled,nonetheless.“You
wishtoseeyourKing?”
“Yes.”Openingmysenses,I
brushedagainstthick,shadowywalls.
“Thenfollowme.”Callumstarted
toturn.“Butonlyyou.Theycannotcome.”
“We’renotleavingher,”Kieran
stated.
“IsaidIwouldletyousee
him,”theBloodQueenspoke,surroundedbyHandmaidensandsilentRoyal
Knights,whoalsoappearedtobeamixtureofvampryandRevenant.“Notallof
you.Thatisaskingfortoomuch,whilethinkinglittleofmyintelligence.
Theywillremainbehindtoensureyourbehavior.”
Reavershookhishead,hischin
low.“Youinsultourintelligenceifyouthinkwewillallowherto
walkoffalone.”
TheBloodQueen’sgazeflicked
tothedrakenandlingeredfarlongerthanwascomfortable.“Ifyouchoosenot
toagree,thenyouwillnotseehimatall.”
Kieranstiffened,asdidI.He
knewwhatIwoulddecidebeforeIcouldevenspeak.“Iagree,”Isaid,meeting
Kieran’sstare.“Iwillbefine.”
“Ofcourse,shewill,”Callum
confirmed.
IignoredhimasIlookedatthe
BloodQueen,catchingandholdinghergaze.ThePrimalessenceburnedinmy
chest,sparking.Theairchargedaroundme.“Ifanythinghappenstothem,I
willbringthisentirecastledownonyourhead,stonebystone.”
“Goosebumps,”Callummurmured,
liftinghisarms.“You’vegivenmegoosebumps.Remarkable.”Hisgazeflicked
tome.“Ihaven’tfeltsuchpowerin,well…”Theedgeofhisteethdraggedover
hislip.“Inaverylongtime.”
Reaver’sheadswiveledin
Callum’sdirection.“Howlong?”
“Long,”hesaid.
IsawthatIsbeth’sfeatureshad
tightened.“Yes.Remarkable.”Herchintilted.“Nothingwillhappentothem.
Malik.”Shesnappedherfingers,andhecameforwardlikealoyalhound.“Show
themtotheirrooms—andIdomeantheirindividualrooms.”
Ireacheddown,gentlysqueezing
Kieran’shandasseveralknightsjoinedMalik.“I’llbefine.”IturnedtoReaver
andthenreturnedmygazetoKieran.“Gowithhim.”
AmusclethrobbedinKieran’sjaw.
“I’llbelisteningforyoutoreturn.”
Meaninghewouldbeinhiswolven
form,allowingmetocommunicatewithhim.Inoddedandthensteppedforward,
stoppingatMalik’sside.Helookedstraightahead,hisbodyrigid.Icould
stilltastehisanguish.Thatsorrowcouldhavecomefrommanydifferent
sources,butIstoppedmyselffromgoingdownaroadthatwouldsurelyendindisappointment.
Iforcedmyselftowalkpasthim.
“Ready?”Callumaskedina
jovialtoneasifhewerequestioningifIwouldjointhemforsupper.
LeavingKieranandReaverwith
Malikandtheknightswasextremelydifficult,butIdidn’tthinkIsbethwould
attemptsomethingwretchedyet
MillicentandtheBloodQueen
fellintostepbesidemeasIfollowedCallumthroughthewinding,crimson-banner-adorned
halls,myhandsclasped,muchlikeIusedtodowhenwalkingthehallsofCastle
TeermanastheMaiden.Except,thistime,itwasn’tbecauseIhadbeeninstructed
towalkassuch.Ididittostopmyselffromdoingsomethingreckless
Likestranglingmymother.
“Icanrememberthelasttime
youwalkedthesehalls,”theBloodQueenstarted.“Youweresoquietandquick,
alwaysrunningabout—”
“WithIan,”Icutin,notingthe
thinningofhermouthaswepassedthekitchens.“Doyourememberthelasttime
hewalkedthesehalls?”
“Ido,”sherepliedasMillicent
walkedbesideme,verymuchinthesamemannerasIdid,handsclaspedand
alert.“Ithinkabouthimeveryday.”
Angerrose,scorchingtheback
ofmythroatasIsawtwoRoyalGuardsahead,openingheavy,woodendoors.At
once,Iknewwewereheadedunderground.“Ibetyoudo.”
“Youmaynotbelievethis,”the
BloodQueensaid,hercrown’sshinedullingasweenteredanolderpartof
Wayfairwhereonlygaslampsandcandleslitthehalls,“butveryfewthings
painmeasgreatlyashisloss.”
“You’reright.Idon’tbelieve
you.”Myfingerscurledinward,pressingagainstmypalmsaswedescendedthewide,
stonestairs.“Youkilledhim.Youdidn’tneedto,butyoudid.Thatwasyour
choice,andhedidn’tdeservethat.Hedidn’tdeservetobeAscended.”
“Hedidn’tdeservetobegranted
alonglifewherehewouldnothavetoworryaboutsicknessorinjury?”Isbethcountered.
Ichokedoutaharshlaugh.“A
longlife?Youmadesurethatdidn’thappen.”FeelingMillicent’sgazeonme,I
relaxedmyfingers.“Idon’twanttotalkaboutIan.”
“Itwasyouwhobroughthimup.”
“Thatwasamistake.”
TheBloodQueenwentquietaswe
enteredtheundergroundhall.Evenbelowground,theceilingswerehigh,the
openingstootherpathsroundedandmeticulouslycleaned.Itwaseerily
silent—notawhisperofsound.Mygazeroamedahead,followingtheseemingly
endlessrowsofsandstonecolumnsrisingtotheceilingtowhereitwasn’tnearly
aswelllit,andshadowshuddledattheedgesofthecolumns.Icouldalmost
seemyselfnow—muchyounger,veiled,andsoverylonelyasIcreptdownthe
hall.
Callumstopped,facingus.“We
cannotallowyoutoseewherewego.Youwillbeblindfolded.”
Ididn’tliketheideaofbeing
unabletoseewhatanyofthemweredoingaroundme,butInodded.“Thendo
it.”
Millicentsteppedbehindmeas
quietasanyspirit.Aheartbeatlater,Icouldseenothingbutdarkness.
Thepathwetookwasasilentandconfusingjourney.Millicent
heldmyarm,steeringmealongforwhatseemedlikeaneternity.Itfeltasif
Iwerewalkingstraightandthenmakingconstant,continuousturns.Ihadto
applaudherskillbecauseIhadnohopeofeverretracingoursteps.
Ihadthespell,though.And
basedonthelengthoftimewewalked,IknewIcouldn’tuseitinthechambers
underWayfair.WehadtobenearorundertheGardenDistrictbythetime
Millicentstoppedus,whichmeantwecouldpossiblyenterthetunnelsviaone
oftheTemples.
Theairhadgrowncolder,damp,
andmusty,sendingajoltofalarmthroughmeasMillicentuntiedtheblindfold.
Howcouldanyonebekeptdownhereandbewell?Myheartspedup.
Theclothfellaway,revealing
Callumtoweringoverme.Surprised,Itookastepback,bumpingintoMillicent.
Themustinessoftheundergroundtunnelsmust’vebeenstrongtohidethesweetscent
ofdecay.Hewassoclosenow,Isawamolebeneaththegoldenfacepaint,just
belowhisrighteye.
Callumsmiledashispalegaze
trackedovermyfeatures—overthescars.“Itmusthavehurtsomethingterrible.”
“Doyouwanttofindout?”I
offered,andthatclosed-lipsmileofhiswentupanotch.“Youwillifyoucontinue
standingsoclosetome.”
“Callum.”TheBloodQueenspoke
frombehindus.
TheRevenantretreated,bowing
slightly.Hissmileremained,asdidhisunblinkingstare.Holdinghisgazefor
amomentlonger,Iquicklylookedaround.Isawnothingbutdampstonewalls
litbytorches.
“Whereishe?”Idemanded.
“Attheendofthehalltoyour
left,”Callumanswered.
Istartedforward.
“Penellaphe,”Isbethcalledout,
thesoundofmynamedrippingfromherlipshittingmynerveslikeCravenclaws
againststone.“Ipromisedthesafetyofyourmen.Howyoubehavenextwilldetermine
whetherornotthatpromiseiskept.”
Herwords…
AchillwentdownmyspineasI
slowlyturnedtoher.GuardsandHandmaidenssurroundedher.OnlyMillicent
stoodofftotheside,acrossfromCallum.Isbeth’swordswereawarning,notjust
forwhatshe’ddo,butwhatIwouldsoonfind.
ThePrimalessencethrummedjust
beneaththesurfaceofmyskin.Ahundreddifferentretortsburnedthetipof
mytongue,fillingmymouthwiththesmokeofpromisedviolence.Butoncemore,
Ipulledonallthoseyearsofsilence—nomatterwhatwassaidordone.I
swallowedthesmoke.
“Casteelhasneverbeen
a…pleasantguest,”sheadded,herdarkeyesglimmeringinthefirelight.Guest?
Aguest?“And,unlikehisbrother,hehasneverlearnedhow
tomakeasituationeasierforhimself.”
Aburstofacidicangerhitthe
backofmythroat,cominginasharp,quickpunchfromMillicent.Notforone
seconddidIbelievetheemotionstemmedfromtalkofCasteel.Itwasthe
mentionofMalik.Herreactionwascurious,aswashiswhenwe’dbeenatOak
Ambler.IfiledthatallawayasIturnedfromtheBloodQueen.AndIdidn’t
sayanythingasIwalkedforward.IfIdid,itwouldendbadly.
Eachstepfeltliketwenty,and
IlostanysemblanceofcalmImighthavehadasIgrewcloserandsawthe
shadow-filledopeningcurvedintothecellwall.Myhandsrepeatedlyopenedand
closedasfearforwhatIwouldsee—whatIwoulddo—crashedintothe
anticipationandragewithinme.Thisplacewasn’tevenfitforaCraven,and
shehadCasteelhere?
Asoundcamefromtherecesses
ofthecell.Itwasroughandlow,asnarlthatdidn’tsoundmortalasI
hurriedthroughtheopeningintothedim,candlelitspace.
Ispottedhimthen.
Andmyheartcrackedunderthe
weightofwhatIsaw.
Chapter25
Limp,darkwavesfell
forward,shieldingmostofCasteel’sface.AllIcouldseewashis
mouth—lipspeeledback,andfangsbared.
Hisgrowlvibratedfromachest
thatshouldn’thavebeensoslender.Thebonesofhisshouldersstoodoutas
starklyasthetwistedoneschaininghimtothewall.BondsIknewweremadeof
thebonesoflong-deaddeities.Theyhadn’tbeenusedtokeephimchained.They
didnothingtohim.
Theintentwastostopsomeone
likemefrombreakingthem.
Shadowstoneshacklesencircled
hisankles,wrists…andhisthroat.Histhroat.Hisactual,fucking
throat.Andhisskin—goodgods,notaninchwasn’tcoveredinthin,angry,redlines.
Nowhere,fromhiscollarbonetohisbreeches.Theclothalongthecalfofhis
rightleghadbeentorn,revealingajaggedwoundthatlookedtoomuchlikea
Cravenbite.Thedirtiedbandageonhislefthand…
Gods.
I’dthoughtIhadprepared
myself,butItrulywasn’tready.Seeingwhathadbeendonetohimwasa
horrifyingshock.
“Casteel,”Iwhispered,starting
forward.
Helaunchedtohisfeet,swiping
outwithcurledfingers.Ijerkedtoastop,narrowlyavoidinghisreachasthe
chainathisnecksnappedhimback.Hisbarefeet,dirtywithdriedblood,
slippedoverthedampstone.Somehow,hekepthisbalance.Fightingthebindings,
thechainscreakedashethrewhisheadback.
Oh,gods.Hiseyes…
Icouldonlyseeathinstripof
gold.
Mygiftcamealive,spillingout
frommeinawaythathadn’thappenedinalongtime.Iconnectedtohim,flinching
ashisemotionsswampedme,cominginadark,gnawingwaveofpainfulhunger.
Bloodlust.
He’dfallenintobloodlust.I
knewinthatmomentthathehadnoideawhoIwas.Allhesensedwasmyblood.
PossiblyeventhePrimalessenceinthatblood.Iwasn’thisQueen.
Hisfriendorwife.Iwasn’thisheartmate.Iwasnothingbutfood.
ButwhatcutdeepandtothequickwasthatIknewhehadnoideawhohe
was.
Mychestroseandfellrapidly
asItriedtocatchmybreath.Iwantedtoscream.Tocry.
Mostofall,Iwantedtoburn
therealm.
Thosenearlyblackeyesdarted
totheopening,hisgrowlgrowinglouder,deeper.
“Iwouldn’tstandtoocloseto
him,”Callumadvised.“He’slikearabidanimal.”
MyheadjerkedtotheRevenant.
Millicentstoodbehindhim.“Iwillmakesureyoudie,”Ipromised.“Andit
willhurt.”
“Youknow,”hedrawled,leaning
againstthestoneashecrossedhisarmsandjerkedhischintowardCasteel,“he
saidthesamething.”
“ThenI’llmakesurehehasthe
pleasureofwitnessingit.”
Callumchuckled.“Sogivingof
you.”
“Youhavenoidea.”Iturnedfrom
himbeforeIdiscoveredhowaRevenantsurviveddecapitation.
Casteelwasstillstaringatthe
Revenant.HisfocushadzeroedinonCallum,eventhoughIwasmuchcloserto
him.ThewayhefixatedontheRevenantgavemehopethathewasn’tcompletely
lost.
Thathewasstillinthere,and
Icouldreachhim—remindhimofwhohewas.Stophimbeforehebecameathing
insteadofaperson.
Isprangforward,claspinghis
arm.Heswunghisheadtome,hissing.Hisskinwashot—toohot.And
dry.Feverish.Isteppedintohim.
“Shit,”Millicentexclaimedfrom
thehall.
Casteelwaslikeaviper.Hewent
straightformythroat.ButI’dexpectedthemoveandcaughthimbythechin,
holdinghisheadback.Therough,shorthairsonhisjawfeltstrangeagainst
mypalm.Hehadlostsomeofhisbodymass,andIwasstrong,buthishungergave
himthestrengthoftengods.MyarmshookasItappedintotheessence,
lettingmygiftroartothesurface.
Silvery-whitelightsparked
acrossmyvisionandfrommyhands,washingoverskinthatshouldn’tbesodull
andhot.IchanneledeveryhappymemoryIcouldintothetouch—memoriesofus
inthecavern.Whenwestoppedpretending.UsonourkneesbeforeJasper,our
ringsclaspedinourhands.Thewayhe’dlookedatmeinthatbluegownin
Saion’sCove.Howhe’dtakenmeinthatgarden,upagainstthewall.Ifunneled
theenergyintohim,prayingthathealinghisphysicalwoundswouldeasesome
ofthepainofhunger,calminghimenoughforhimtorememberwhohewas.It
wouldhopefullybeatemporaryfix,atleast.Easingtheknife’sedgeofhunger
sohecouldfeedwithoutdoingrealandpainfuldamage.Becausehewouldnowif
Ilethim.Andthatwouldhurthim.Itwouldkillapartofhim.
AspasmranthroughCasteel’s
body.Hewentpainfullyrigidforaheartbeat,nolongerpushingagainstmy
touch.Thenhejerkedawaysofast,hecompletelybrokefreeofmyhold.I
stumbled,nearlyfallingashepressedbackagainstthewall.Thesilveryglow
fadedfrommyhands,fromhimashestoodthere,headbowedandchest
heaving.Thenumerous,impossible-to-countcutsdownhisarms,acrosshis
chest,andonhisstomachhadfadedtofaint,pinkmarks.Thecandlelightdidn’t
reachhislowerbody,andIcouldn’tseethewoundonhislegnow,butI
imaginedthatittoohadbeguntoheal.Hishand,though…Myabilitiescouldn’t
fixthat
Secondsstretchedwiththeonlysounds
hisraggedbreathingandamuted,steadythumpfromabove.Carriagewheels?
“Cas?”
Heshuddered—hisentirebodyand
thechainsmoving.Heliftedhishead,andIsawthathisface…it,too,wasthinner
Likeithadbeeninthatfirstdream.Theshadowofhairalonghisjawandchin
haddarkened.Deeperhollowshadformedunderhischeeksandeyes.
Buthiseyes…theyopened,andthey
werestillthatstunningshadeofgold.“Poppy.”
Casteel
Shestoodbeforeme,abrightflamethathadbeaten
backtheredhazeofbloodlust.Shewashere.Real.
MyQueen.
Mysoul.
Mysavior.
Poppy
Thiswasnodream.Nota
hallucinationliketheonesthathadplaguedmeinthelasthoursanddays.Poppy
hadsaidthatshewouldcomeforme,andnowshewashere.
Ipushedoffthewall.Thebone
chainsrattled,pullingtautly.Thebandtightenedaroundmythroat,butPoppy
wasalreadymoving.BeforeIcouldtakemynextbreath,shewasinmyarms.
Somehow,Iendeduponmyass,butshewasstillinmyarms.Warm.
Solid.Soft.Holdingmetightly.Pressinghercheekagainstmine.Iwasfilthy.
Imuststink.Thefloorofthecellwasrank.Noneofthatstoppedherfrompressing
aquickkisstomycheek,brow,andthebridgeofmynose.
Ididn’twantanyofthisfilth
totouchher,butIcouldn’tbringmyselftoseparatefromher.Hertouch.The
feelofherinmyarms.ThefaintscentofjasminethatIbreathedin.
Hergifthadsnaggedmefromthe
edgeofnothingnessandpulledmeback,butitwasher—simplyher—who
keptmefromspinningtothatbrinkagain.Isankmyfingersintoherbraid,my
fleshcomingaliveatthesensationofthosestrandsagainstmyskin.
Poppywas…gods,shewas
groundinginawayonlyshecouldbe.Hermerepresencegatheredallthose
fragmentedshardsthathadbrokenoffandfloatedaway,piecingthembacktogether
oncemore.
Ishookasshesmoothedher
fingersthroughmyhairandthenmovedherhandstomycheeks.Shestilled
againsttheroughpatchesofhairandthedampnessthere.
“It’sokay,”shewhispered
thickly,sweepingawaythewetnesswithherthumbandthenherlips.“It’s
okay.I’mhere.”
I’mhere.
Istiffened,myfingers
clenchingherbraid.Shetrulywashere.Inthiscellwithme.Andweweren’t
alone.Myeyessnappedopen,andIsearchedthespaceforKieran.
GoldenBoywaitedatthe
entrancewiththatfuckingsmirkonhisface.TheHandmaidenwaswithhim.She
wasn’tsmirking.Shestoodwithherarmscrossed,silentandstill.Beyondthem,
intheshadows,otherguardswatched.Knightswiththeirfacescoveredin
black.
Myentirebodywentcold.This
wasnorescue.
ItightenedmyarmaroundPoppy’s
waist,shiftingusasbestIcouldwiththedamnchains.Icouldonlygether
bodyhalfwayshieldedbymine.
Iturnedmyhead,pressingmy
mouthtothespacebyherear.“Whathappened?”Ispokelow,nottakingmyeyes
offtheentranceforonedamnsecond.
“TheycaughtusoutsideThree
Rivers.”
Thekindofpanicthathad
piercedmysoulwhenI’dseenthatboltprotrudingfromherchestslammedinto
menow,kickingmysluggishheartintoagallop.
AndPoppysensedit.Iknewshe
did.
Shekissedmycheekwithwarm,
softlips.“It’sokay,”sherepeated,pettingthenapeofmyneck.“Kieranand
Reaverarewithme.They’resafe.”
Reaver…Ittookmeamomentto
rememberthedraken,butthereliefthatcamewithknowingthatshewasn’t
alonewiththeseviperswasshort-lived.“Havetheyhurtyou?”
“Doesshelookasifshehas
beenharmed?”Calluminterjected.
“DoesitlooklikeI’mtalking
toyou?”Igrowled.
“I’mactuallysurprisedtosee
youspeakingatall,”thegoldenRevreplied.“YourQueenmustbemadeofmagic,
consideringthatthelasttimeIsawyou,allyoucoulddowasfoamatthemouth.”
Poppy’sheadswiveledinthe
Rev’sdirection.“Ichangedmymind.IwillkillyouthefirstchanceIget.”
TheRevchuckled.“Notnearlyas
givingasIthoughtyouwere.”
“Howaboutwemakeadeal?”I
saidtoPoppy,easingmyfingersfromherbraid.Idrewthemdownthethicklength
ofherhair.“Whoevergetstohimfirst,getsthehonor.”
“Deal,”shesaid.
“Threatsareunnecessary,”came
thevoiceIloathedmostofall.
TheHandmaidensteppedasideas
theBloodQueenemergedfromtheshadows.Myeyesnarrowedatthesightofher,
herbodyswathedinwhite.IpulledPoppycloser.Iwould’vetuckedherinside
mydamnbodyifIcouldhave.
“Andtheyarealsopointless,”Isbeth
continued.“Noneofyou,notevenmydeardaughter,cankillmyRevenants.Your
drakenremainwithyourarmies—well,whateverisleftofthem.”
Poppyflinched,andthesightof
that,theknowledgeoftheblowtheBloodQueenhadlanded,nearlysentme
straighttotheedgeagain.Ragepooledinmyemptygut.
“Fuckyou,”Ispat.
“Charming,”Isbethreplied.
AstheBloodQueenandIlocked
stares,itoccurredtomethattheymustnotknowthatPoppyhadbroughtadraken
withher.IsbethknewKieran.Sheneverwould’vemetthisReaver.Thatalone
shouldhaveraisedsuspicions…unlessshehadnoknowledgethattheycouldtake
mortalform—orshesimplyunderestimatedPoppythatmuch.
Very,veryfoolishofher.
Iduckedmychin,hidingmy
smileagainstPoppy’scheek.
Shemust’vefelttheriseofmy
lipsbecausesheturnedherheadbacktomine,seekingthesmile.Hermouth
closedovermineinakissthatwasn’ttentativeorinnocent.Itwasoneof
strength.Oflove.Andthetasteofhermouthshookeverypartofme.Ididn’t
evenknowuntilthenthatonlyakisscoulddothat.
Poppyliftedherhead.“Heneeds
tofeed,”shesaid,handsclaspingmycheeks.“Andheneedsfoodandfresh,
cleanwater.”ShepausedasItensed.Hergazeflickedtothehipbath,andher
chestrosewithasharpinhale.“Todrink.”
Todrink.
Nottobathe.
Sheknew.Somehow,she’dfigured
itout.OrKieranhadtoldher.ProbablyKieran,butstill,sheremembered.
“Hehasbeengivenallthosethings,”
theBloodQueenanswered.“Andasyoucansee,hehasmadenouseofallthat
freshwaterprovidedtohim.”
Hereyesclosedbriefly.“Hehas
onlybeengivenenoughtosurvive.Heneedsfood.Realfood.Andhe
needs—”
“Blood.Whichhehasalsobeen
provided.Ifhehadn’t,youwouldn’tbesittinginhislaprightnow.You’dbe
lyingtherewithyourthroattornopen,”Isbethstated.
Whatshe’dsaidwasblunt.
Cruel.Butitwasthetruth.Whatlittlethey’dgivenmehadpushedmetothe
edge.Butwithoutit?Iwouldbegone.
Poppymovedherhanddown,
bringingherwristclosetomymouth.Eveninthefaintlight,Isawthepale
blueveinsunderherskin.Mylipsparted.Musclestensedpainfully—
“Ididnotgiveyoupermission
tobleedforhim.”TheBloodQueen’svoicewascloser,butIcouldn’tlookaway
fromthatvein.
“Idon’tneedyourpermission,”
Poppyspat.
“Iwouldhavetodisagree.”
Poppy’sheadcutinher
direction.“Tryandstopme.”
Therewasabeatofsilence.
“Andwhat?Youbringthisstonedownonmyheadasyoupromised?Ifso,you
willbringitdownonallofus.”
“Sobeit,”Poppyhissed.
“She’lldoit,”Isaid,curling
myrighthandaroundherarm,forcingmyeyesawayfromherwrist.“AndIkind
ofwanttoseeherdoit.”
Isbeth’slipcurled.“Youwould
wantsomethingsoidiotic.”
Ismiledather.
“Whatever.”Isbeththrewupa
hand.“Feedhimandgetitoverwith.Thiswholesceneistiresome.”
Poppytwistedbacktome,
foldingherhandaroundthenapeofmyneck.“Feed.”
Mygazedroppedtothatvein
again.Ihesitated,evenasmystomachclenched.Herblood…itwaspowerful,and
she’dpulledmebackfromtheedgebefore.Butsheneededherstrength.I
didn’tknowifshehadlearnedifsheneededtofeedornot,andI
wasn’tabouttoaskthatinourpresentcompany.Iwouldn’triskher
well-being.
Iloweredmymouthtoherwrist,
droppingakisstothatveinasIbracedmyselfagainstthesurgeofneedand
hungerthatrose.Ididn’tblockthepain.Iquietedit,knowingshewould
searchforit.“Idon’tneedtofeed.”
“Yes,youdo.”Poppydippedher
head.“Youneedblood.”
“Yourtouch…itpulledmeback.
Thatwasenough.”Iloweredherwrist.
Herbreathsnagged.“Cas—”
Igroaned,feelingthesoundof
mynameinawayshewouldlikelyfindhighlyinappropriategiventhesituation.
“It’sbetterthatIdon’t.”
Poppy’sbrowscreasedwithfrustration.
“Thenfood.Iwantfoodbroughtin.Now.”
“Foodwillbebroughttohim,”
Callumanswered,andittookeverythinginmenottolaugh.Stalebread?Moldy
cheese.Yeah,food.
“Thengogetit,”Poppyordered.
“Now.”
Ifoughtanothersmile.Oh,how
shefoughtforme.“MyQueen,”Iwhispered,trailingmyfingersalongthecurve
ofherjaw.“Sodemanding.”
“Yes.Thatsheis,”theBlood
Queenstatedcoolly.“Shewillalsobeleavingyourembrace.”
“No.”Shecurledherarmaround
myshoulders.“I’mnotleavinghim.Iwillstayrightherewithhim.”
“Thatwasnotapartofthe
deal.Youpromisedthatyouwouldspeakwithme.”
“Ipromisedtotalktoyou.I
didn’tagreetodosoinanycertainlocation,”Poppyshotback.
“Youhavegottobekiddingme,”
Isbethmuttered.“Youexpectmetostaydownhere?”
“Idon’tcarewhatyoudo,”
Poppysnapped.
“Youshould.IfyouthinkIwill
allowyou,mydaughter,tostaydownhere,youarefoolishlymistaken.”
“YouareholdingaKing
here,”Poppyexclaimed,hereyesflashing.“Themanyourdaughterismarried
to.”
“Oh,nowyourecognize
yourselfasmydaughter?”Isbethlaughed,andthesoundwaslikefallingice.
“Youaretestingmypatience,Penellaphe.”
Iknewwhatwouldhappen.She
wouldn’tstrikeoutatPoppy.TheBloodQueenwouldgoaftersomeoneelse,just
toinflictthekindofhurtthatneverreallyhealed.Iwouldn’tallowthat.
AndeventhoughIdidn’twantPoppyoutofmysightormyarms,Ididn’twant
herdownhereinthishellishplaceeither.Ididn’twantthesewalls,the
smells,andthegodsforsakencoldtojointhenightmaresthatalreadyplagued
her.
“Youcan’tstaydownhere,”I
toldher,draggingmythumbacrossherlip.“Idon’twantthat.”
“Ido.”
“Poppy.”Iheldhergaze,hating
thedampnessIsawgrowingthere.Hatingitmorethananything.“Ican’thave
youdownhere.”
Herlowerliptrembledasshewhispered,
“Idon’twanttoleaveyou.”
“Youwon’t.”Ikissedherforehead.
“Youneverhave.Youneverwill.”
“Mydaughterisobviouslystill
desperatelyworriedaboutyou,”Isbethspoke,derisiondrippinglikesyrupfrom
herwords.“Iassuredherthatyouwerealiveandwell—”
“Well?”Poppyrepeated,andthat
onewordcausedeveryinstinctIhadtogoonhighalert.Itwashervoice.I’d
neverhearditsoundlikethatbefore.Asifitweremadeofshadowsandsmoke.
ThenormallychattyHandmaiden
unfoldedherarms,herstarefixingonPoppy.
Poppyturnedherattentionbackto
me.Herhandsslippedtomycheeksandthenmyshoulders.Inthewaningcandlelight,
hergazemovedovermyfaceandthenlower—acrossthenumerous,now-fadedcuts.
Herhandsliddownmyleftarm,tugginguntilherfingersreachedtheedgeof
thebandage.Hercheststilled.
Arippleofstatichittheair,
drawingahissfromthegoldenRev.Slowly,hereyesliftedtomine,andIsaw
it—theglowbehindherpupils.Thepowerthrobbedandthenspreadinthin
streaksofsilveracrossthosebeautifulgreenirises.Thesightwasfascinating.
Stunning.Thatstubbornjawofherstightened.Shedidn’tblink,andIknew
thatlook.Fuck.I’dbeenonthereceivingendofit,rightbeforesheplungeda
daggerintomychest.
Iwishedweweresomeplaceelse.
AnywhereIcouldshowherwithmylipsandtongueandeverypartofmejusthow
incrediblyintriguingthatdisplayofviolentpowerwas.
AshiverwentthroughPoppy—a
vibrationthatsentanotherrippleofenergythroughthecellasshelooked
overhershoulder.“Youhavehimchainedandstarved,”shesaid,andthat
voice…GoldenBoystraightened.TheskinaroundIsbeth’smouthpuckered.They
heardit,too.“Youhavehurthimandkepthiminaplacenotfitfor
evenaCraven.Yetyousayheiswell?”
“Hewouldbeinfarbetter
accommodationsifheknewhowtobehave,”Isbethremarked.“Ifheshowedeven
oneiotaofrespect.”
Thatreallypissedmeoff,but
Poppy’sskinnowhadafaintsheen.Asoftglowasifshewerelitfromwithin.
I’dseenitbefore.WhatIdidn’trememberwaswhatIsawslidingandswirling
underhercheeknow.Shadows.Shehadshadowsinherflesh.
“Whywouldhe,whendealingwith
someonesounworthyofrespect?”Poppyquestioned,andIblinkedrapidly,
swearingthetemperatureofthecelldroppedbyseveraldegrees.
“Careful,daughter,”Isbeth
warned.“Itoldyouoncebefore.Iwillonlytolerateyourdisrespecttoa
point.Youdonotwanttocrossthatlinemorethanyoualreadyhave.”
Poppysaidnothing,andthe
shadowsceasedtheirrelentlesschurningunderherskin.Everythingabouther
becamestilloncemore,butIfeltitundermyhandsandagainstme,buildingand
rampingup.Thethingunderherflesh.Power.Pure,unfetteredpower.Anache
settledinmyupperjaw.Fuck.Heressence.Icouldfeelit.
“Youaresoverypowerful,
daughter.Ifeelitpressingagainstmyskin.It’scallingtoeveryoneandeverything
inthischamberandbeyond.”TheBloodQueenbentslightlyatthewaist,herpale
faceexpressionless.“Youhavegrownintheshorttimesincewelastsaweach
other.Butyoustillhaven’tlearnedtoquietthattemperofyours.IfIwere
you,Iwouldlearntodosoquickly.Pullitbackbeforeit’stoolate.”
Therewasnooneintheentirety
ofthetwokingdomsthatIwantedtoseedeadmorethantheBloodQueen.No
one.ButPoppyneededtoheedthewarning.Isbethwasacorneredviper.She
wouldstrikewhenleastexpected,andshewoulddosoinawaythatwouldleave
deep,unforgivingscars.ShealreadyhadwithIan.
“Poppy,”Isaidquietly,and
thosefracturedeyeslatchedontomine.“Go.”
Sheshookherheadfiercely,
sendingloosecurlsacrosshercheeks.“Ican’t—”
“Youwill.”Icouldn’tbearto
seeherstrengthcrackinglikethis.Fuck.Ithurt.Butseeingherweatherwhatever
blowtheBloodQueenwoulddelivernextifshecontinueddisobeyingherwould
killme.“Iloveyou,Poppy.”
Sheshook.“Iloveyou.”
Tighteningmyarmaroundher,I
hauledhercloseandkissedher.Ourtonguestangled.Ourhearts.Icommitted
thefeelandtasteofhertomemorytodrowninthemlater.Shewasbreathingjust
ashardasIwaswhenourlipsfinallyparted.
“FromthefirstmomentIsawyou
smile…Andheardyoulaugh?Gods,”Irasped,andsheshuddered,her
beautifuleyesclosing.“FromthefirsttimeIsawyounockanarrowandfire
withouthesitation?Handleadaggerandfightbesideanother?Fightme?
Iwasinawe.I’mnevernotinaweofyou.I’malwaysutterly
mesmerized.I’llneverstopbeingthat.Alwaysandforever.”
Poppy
Alwaysandforever.
Thosetwowordsweretheonly
thingsthatallowedmetokeepmytemperincheckastheyescortedme
backthroughthewinding,endlessnetworkoftunnels.Barely.Thetremblingthe
ragehadcausedhadceased,buttheangerhadn’tlessened.HowCasteelhadbeen
treatedwouldhaunteverybreathItook,aswouldhischoicenottofeed.
Notasinglepartofmebelieved
thatmygifthadbeenenoughtostaveoffhishunger.I’dfeltit.Thegnawing
achewasfarworsethanwhatI’dexperiencedorwhatI’dfeltfromhiminNew
Haven.
He’dmadethechoicebecausehe
didn’twanttopotentiallyweakenme.
Gods,Ididn’tdeservehim.
Westopped,andtheyremovedthe
blindfoldoncewereachedthevasthallbeneathWayfair.
TheBloodQueenstooddirectlyin
frontofme.Icouldn’tbelieveshe’dallowedmetoseeCasteellikethat
ButIrememberedthatshewasa
coldheartedbitch.
“You’reangrywithme,”she
statedasMillicentsteppedtotheside.Callumremainedtomyright,fartoo
closeforcomfort.“WithhowyoubelieveCasteelhasbeentreated.”
“Isawwithmyowneyeshowhe’s
beentreated.”
“Itcould’vebeeneasierforhim,”
shesaid,therubycrownglitteringasshetiltedherhead.“Hemadeitharder
forhimself,especiallywhenhekilledoneofmyHandmaidens.”
Mygazeflickedtowherethey
stoodsilently.TheyeachhadthepaleblueeyesofaRevenant,butnotallhad
inthebedchamber—andneitherhadCoralena.“Mymotherhadbrowneyes,yetyou
saidshewasaRevenant.”
“Shewasnotyourmother.She
wasIan’s,butnotyours.”Tensionbracketedhermouth.“Andshedidnothave
browneyes.Herswerejustliketheothers.”
“Irememberthem—”
“Shehidthem,Penellaphe.With
magic.MagicIlenther.”Justlikeshe’dlenttheessencetoVessa.
“AndIdidso,onlybecausewhenyouwerelittle,hereyesscaredyou.”
Surpriserolledthroughme.Using
thePrimalessenceforsuchathinghadnevercrossedmymind.“Why…whywouldher
eyesscareme?”
“That,Icannotanswer.”
I’dburiedthememoriesofthe
HandmaidenssodeeplythatithadtakenAlastirspeakingofthemtotriggerany
recollection.HadIsomehowbeenabletosensewhattheywereandthathad
causedmyfear?
“Ididn’twanttohurtCasteel,”
Isbethannounced,jerkingmefrommythoughts.“Doingsoonlyservestodrive
thewedgebetweenusfurther.Butyouleftmewithnochoice.Youkilledthe
King,Penellaphe.IfIdidnothing,itwould’vebeenasignofweaknesstothe
Royals.”
ThebreathIexhaledfeltlike
fireinmythroat.Herwordscollidedwithmyguilt.“WhatIdidmayhaveguided
youractions,butitwasstillyourhand.You’renotabsolvedof
responsibility,Isbeth.Justlikehowwhathappenedtoyoursondoesn’t
justifyallyou’vedonesince.”
Hernostrilsflaredasshe
staredatme.“IfIkillCasteel,youwoulddoworsethanIevercould’ve
imagined.Andifthatdayevercomes,judgemethenformyactions.”
Thewaveoffurythatswept
throughmewasonlycooledbytherealizationthatshespokethetruth.That
empty,coldpartofmestirred.Ididn’tknowwhatIwoulddo,butitwouldbe
horrific,andIknewthat.
ThatwaswhyI’dmadeKieran
makethatpromise.
Ilookedaway,shakingmyhead.
“WillyousendfoodtoCasteel?Freshfood?”Itookashakybreath.“Please.”
“Doyouthinkyoudeservethat?”
Callumasked.“Betteryet,doyoureallythinkhedoes?”
Spinningaround,I’dalready
graspedthedaggerathishipbythetimeheregisteredthatI’dmoved.Islammed
thebladedeepintohischestandintohisheart.
Aflickerofshockwidenedhis
eyesashelookeddownatthehiltofthedagger
“Iwasn’tspeakingtoyou,”I
snarled,lettinggooftheblade.
“Dammit,”hemuttered,blood
tricklingfromthecornerofhismouth.Hetoppledoverlikeapileofbricks,
hittingthefloor.Thebackofhisheadmetthestonewithasatisfyinglyloud
crack.
Millicentchokedonwhatsounded
likealaugh.
“YoujuststabbedmyRevenant.”
Isbethsighed.
“He’llbefine,won’the?”I
facedher.“WillyoupleasesendfreshfoodandwatertoCasteel?”
“Yes,butonlybecauseyouasked
nicely.”TheBloodQueenflickedaglanceatCallum.“Gethimoutofhere.”
ARoyalKnightsteppedforward.
“Notyou.”TheBloodQueenthrew
aglareinMillicent’sdirection.“Sinceyoufindthissoamusing,youcanbe
theonewhocleansitup.”
“Yes,myQueen.”Millicent
steppedforwardandgavesuchanelaboratebowitcouldonlybeamockery.
TheBloodQueen’slipspressed
togetherinathinlineasshewatchedtheHandmaiden.Theinteractionbetween
thetwowas…different.
Isbethturnedherattentionback
tome,herheadtilted.Thelightcutacrossherface,revealingathinstrip
ofslightlydeeper-coloredskinatherhairline.Powder.Sheworesomesortof
powdertomakeherskinpaler.TohelpherblendinwiththeAscended.
“Howhaveyoukeptyouridentity
asecretfromeveryAscended?”Iasked.
Abrowarched.“Don’tforget
thatvampryswereoncemortal,Penellaphe.Andwhiletheyhaveleftmanyof
thosetrappingsbehind,theystillseeonlywhattheywanttosee.Becauselooking
toocloselyatthingsoftenmakesoneuncomfortable.Unsure.Notevenvamprys
enjoylivinglikethat.So,likethosemortalsupstairs,”shesaid,tiltingher
chinup,“andinallofSolis,they’dratherbeoblivioustowhatisrightin
frontofthemthanfeeldoubtorfear.”
Therewassometruthtoher
words.I,myself,hadn’tpriedtoodeeply.Itwasterrifyingtostartpeelingback
thelayers,butothershadthecourage.“AndwhathappenstotheAscendedwhodo
lookclosely?”
“Theyaredealtwith,”sheanswered.
“Justasanyoneelsewouldbe.”
Inotherwords,theywerekilled,
aswouldbeanyDescenter.Disgustcrowdedmybreath.“Whylie,though?You
couldpretendtobeagodtothepeople.”
TheBloodQueensmiled.“Why
wouldIneedto,whentheyalreadybelieveIamtheclosestthingtoone?”
“Butyou’renot.So,why?Doyou
fearthattheywouldseeyouasyouare?Nothingmorethanafalsegod?”
Hersmiledidn’twaver.“Mortals
areeasilyinfluenced.Theycanbeconvincedofanythingbynearlyanyone.Take
fromthem,thengivethemsomethingorsomeonetoblame,andeventhemost
righteouswillfallpreytothat.I’dratherhavethembelievethatallAscended
aregodlike.Thatway,therearemanyinsteadofafewthattheywillnot
question.Onepersoncannotruleakingdomandkeepthemassesinline,”she
shared.“Youshouldknowthat,Penellaphe.”
“Iknowyoushouldn’tneedto
keepanyoneinlineorrulewithlies.”
Isbethlaughedsoftly.“Thatis
averyoptimisticwayoflookingatthings,mychild.”
Thepatronizingtonestruckevery
nerveinmybody.“Yourruleisbuiltonnothingbutlies.Youtoldthepeople
intheGreatHallthatthecitiestothenorthandeasthadfallen.Doyou
reallythinktheywillnotlearnthetruth?”
“Thetruthdoesn’tmatter.”
“Howcanyoubelievethat?”I
shookmyhead.“Thetruthmatters,anditwillbeknown.Itookthosecities
withoutkillinginnocents.Thosewhocalledthoseplaceshomestilldo.They
eitherknowI’mnotthisHarbinger,ortheywillsoonlearnthat—”
“Andyouthinkthatwillhappen
here?InMasadonia?Pensdurth?”Hereyessearchedmine.“Thatyouwillbe
successfulinthiscampaignwhenyou,yourself,arelying?”
Myhandscurledintofists.“How
amIlying?”
“YouaretheHarbinger,”she
said.“Youjustdon’twanttobelieveit.”
Angerpulsedthroughme,quickly
followedbyasurgeofapprehension.Ilookedatthelongshadowycorridor,inhaling
deeply.Themustyscentwasfamiliar,wigglinganoldmemoryfree.
Icreptthroughthesilent
halls,whereonlytheRoyalAscendedtraveledwhenthesunrose,drawnbywhat
I’dseenthelasttimeI’dsnuckwheretheQueentoldmeIshouldnotgo.ButI
likeditdownhere.Iandidn’t,butnoonelookedatmestrangelyhere.
Click.Click.Click.
Softlightseepedfromthe
openingofthechamberasIpressedagainstacoldpillar,peekingaroundthecorner.
AcagesatinthemiddleofthechamberthatlookednothingliketherestofWayfair.
Thefloor,walls,andeventheceilingwereashinyblack,justliketheTemple
ofNyktos.Strangelettershadbeenetchedintotheblackstone,thesymbols
shapednothinglikethoseI’dlearnedinmylessons.Ireachedonehandintothe
chamber,pressingmyfingersagainsttheroughcarvingsasIleanedaroundthe
pillar.
Ishouldn’tbedownhere.
TheQueenwouldbeverymad,butIcouldn’tstopthinkingaboutwhatprowled
restlesslybehindbleached-whitebars,cagedand…helpless.ThatwaswhatI’d
feltfromthelarge,graycavecatwhenI’dfirstseenitwithIan.Helplessness.
ThatwaswhatI’dfeltwhenIcouldnolongerholdontoMomma’sslipperyarm.
Butmygiftdidn’tworkonanimals.TheQueenandPriestessJaneahhadsaidso.
Theclickingoftheanimal’s
clawsceased.Earstwitchedasthewildcat’sbigheadturnedtowhereIpeeked
aroundthecorner.Brightgreeneyeslockedontomine,piercingtheveilthat
coveredhalfmyface—
“Youreyesareyourfather’s.”
Chapter26
Herwordspulledmefromthememory.“What?”
“Whenhewouldgetangry,the
essencewouldbecomemorevisible.Sometimes,theeatherwouldswirlthrough
hiseyes.Othertimes,theywerejustgreen.Yoursdothesame.”Isbethtipped
herheadback,herslenderthroatworkingonaswallow.TheremainingHandmaidens
andknightshadbackedofffromus,leavingusinthecenterofthehall.“I
didn’tknowifyouknewthat.”
Myeyeswere…
Pressureclampeddownonmy
chestandthroatasIbackedup,stoppingwhenIbumpedintoapillar.Onehand
flutteredtowheretheringrestedundermytunic.Ididn’tknowwhythatpiece
ofknowledgeaffectedmesointensely,butitdid.
Ittookmeseveralmomentsto
speak.“Howdidyoucapturehim?”
Isbethdidn’tanswerforalong
moment.“Hecametome,almosttwohundredyearsafterthewarhadended.He
waslookingforhisbrother,andtheonewhocamewithhimcouldsenseMalec’s
bloodandledhimtome.”
“Thedraken?”
Tensesilencefollowed,andin
thosemoments,IthoughtaboutwhatI’dfeltfromthecavecatwhenI’dseenhim
asachild.Hopelessness.Desperation.HadheknownwhoIwas?
“Interestingthatyou’dknow
that,”theBloodQueenfinallysaid.“Veryfewknowwhattraveledwithhim.”
“You’dbesurprisedbywhatI
know.”
“Unlikely,”shereplied.
Iloweredmyhandtothecold
pillarbehindme.“Whereisthedraken?”
“Thedrakenhasbeendealt
with.”
Ibrieflyclosedmyeyes.Iknew
whatthatmeant.Didshehaveanyideathatshehadkilledthefirstdraken’s
daughter?Probablynot,andIdoubtedshecared.
“IknewMalechadatwin,butwhen
Ifirstsawhim…Ithought,mygods,myMalechasfinallyreturnedtome.”
Herbreathcaught,andItastedthetiniestbitofbitterness.Heremotionshad
briefly,forlessthanaheartbeat,punchedthroughmyshields.“Ofcourse,I
waswrong.Themomenthespoke,Iknewhewasn’tMalec,butIletmyself
believethatforalittlewhile.IeventhoughtthatIcouldfallinlovewith
him.ThatIcouldjustpretendthathewasmyMalec.”
Bilecreptupmythroat.“You
pretendedbylockinghiminacageandforcingyourselfuponhim?”
“Ididn’tforcemyself
uponhim.Hechosetostay.”
Gods,shewassuchaliar.
“Hebecameintriguedbythis
world,”sheadded.“He’dneverreallyinteractedwithmortals.Hewascurious
abouttheAscended.Aboutwhathisbrotherhadbeendoing.IthinkIresevengrew
tobecomefondofme.”
“Ifmyfathershowedupinthe
lasttwocenturieslookingforMalec,youwould’vebeenmarriedatthetime.”
“So?”
Mygazeflickedtowherethe
Handmaidensstoodmotionless.IfiguredthatmanyoftheRoyalshadopen
marriages,butwouldIreshavegrowninterestedinhisbrother’slover?Seemed
kindof…gross,butthatwouldbetheleastdisturbingaspectofallofthis.
“Butthenhewantedtoreturn,
andIwasn’treadytolethimgo.”Apause.“AndthenIcouldn’t.”
Ittookeverythinginmenotto
screamather.Shecouldn’t?Asifshehadnochoice?
“Hewasangry.Butwhenwecame
togethertomakeyou,hewasnotforced.Neithertime.”
Atremorranthroughme.I
couldn’ttrustmyselftospeak.Theessencepulsedtooviolently.
“Youdon’tbelieveme?”Isbeth
asked.
“No.”
“Ican’tblameyouforthat.It
wasnotanactoflove.Notoneitherofourparts.Forme,itwasnecessary.I
wantedachild.Astrongone.Iknewwhatyouwouldbe,”shewenton,andI
thoughtImightvomit.“Forhim,itwasjustlustandhatred.Thosetwo
emotionsaren’tverydifferentfromoneanotheroncethere’snothingbutflesh
betweenyou.”Anotherpause.“Perhapsitwillpleaseyoutoknowthathetriedto
killmeafterward.”
Ishuddered,feelingsickened.
“No,”Iwhispered.“Thatdoesn’tpleaseme.”
“Well,that’sasurprise.”
Thebackofmythroatburned,
andIclosedmyeyesagainstarushoftears.Mystomachcontinuedchurning.
Evenifhewasa…anactiveparticipant,shehadalreadytakenhisfreedom.
Therewasnorealconsentthere.AndIsbethwastheworstsortonsomany
differentlevels.
“IusedtowonderwhyittookIressolongtolookforhisbrother.MaybebecauseIressleptsodeeply.But
Malecdidn’tdieallthoseyearsagolikeIbelieved,didhe?Thatbitch
entombedhim.NowIknowthathemust’vebeenconsciousuptothatpoint.Two
hundredyears,Penellaphe.Andthenhemust’veslippedaway,asclosetodeath
ashecouldgetforittothenwakeIres.”
Iopenedmyeyes.“Youwere
heartmates.Howdidyounotknowhewasn’tdead?”
“BecausewhateverEloanadidto
entombhimseveredthatconnection.Thebond.YouknowwhatI’mtalkingabout.
Thatfeeling—theawarenessoftheother,”shesaid.AndIdid.Itwasan
intangiblesenseofknowing.“It’slikethemarriageimprintbutnotonyour
flesh.Inyoursoul.Yourheart.Ifeltthelossofthat,andapartofme
died.That’swhyIbelievedhewasdeadandwishedhewas.Forittooknearly
twohundredyearsforhimtolosewhateverbondhesharedwithhistwin.To
becomeunconscious.Canyouevenimagine?”
“No.”Ithoughtofthosedeities
inthecrypts.
“Eloanamaynothaveknownthathe
wasagod,butsheknewwhatshewasdoingtoadeity.Thattypeofpunishment
isworsethandeath,”shecontinued.“Yourmother-in-lawisnotsoverydifferent
thanyourmother.”
“You’reright,”Isaid.“Except
she’snotnearlyashomicidalasyou.”
TheBloodQueenlaughed.“No,
shejustmurdersinnocentbabes.”
“Andyouhaven’t?”Ifiredback,
notevenbotheringtotellherthatEloanahadclaimedtohavenoknowledgeof
Isbeth’sson’sdeath.Shewouldn’tbelievemeanyway.“Whereishe?”
Hermouthtensed.“Heisnot
here.”
Istaredather,unsurethatI
believedthat.IfshehadbroughtIreswithherwhenshetraveled,Idoubtedhe
wasfar.“So,ifIhadchosentoseehiminsteadofCasteel,wouldyouhave
allowedit?”
“Youneverwould’vechosenanyone
butCasteel,”shereplied.
Guiltchurnedinmystomach.
“ButifIhad?Youwouldn’thaveallowedit,wouldyou?”Whenshedidn’t
answer,IknewthatIwasright.Angerreplacedtheshame.“Whyhaven’tyoulet
himreturntoIliseeum?”
“Otherthanthefactthathe
wouldbesuretoreturnonceheregainedhisstrength?Whenhecouldn’tbeso
easilysubdued?”Isbethhaddrawncloser.“IneedhimtomakemyRevenants.”
Arippleofunderstandingwent
throughme.“YouneededagodtoAscendthethirdsonsanddaughters.Andyou
alreadyhadknowledgeofKolis’sessenceandhowtouseit,thankstoMalec.”
Isbethstudiedme.“Iwaswrong
earlier.Ididn’tknowthatyouwouldbeawareofhim.Thatis…curious.”
Mypalmslippedonthepillar,
andIturned,feelinganindentationinthestone.Ishiftedslightly,looking
down.Thereweremarkingsthere,shallowandspacedeverycoupleoffeet.Acircle
withaslashthroughit,halfoff-center.Justliketheboneandropesymbols
inthewoodsneartheDeadBonesClan.
“Whatarethesemarks?”Iasked.
“Asafeguardofsorts,”she
answered.
Ipressedmythumbagainstthe
markings.“Morestolenmagic?”
“Borrowedmagic.”
“Howdotheyactasa
safeguard?”
Isbeth’sgazeliftedtomine,
andshesmiled.“Theykeepthingsin—orthingsout.”
Casteel
Poppywashere.
Ipulledharderonthechain,
cursingwhenthehookrefusedtobudgeevenacentimeter.HowmanytimeshadI
triedtoloosenthesedamnchainssinceI’dbeenhere?Countless.Inthelast
coupleofdays,hungerhaddriventhefrenziedattempts.Now,Iwasjustas
desperate,butfordifferentreasons.
Poppywashere.
Panicslicedthroughmygut.She
couldtakecareofherself.Shewasafuckinggoddess,butshewasn’t
infallible.Noonewas.ExceptforthePrimal,whospentmostofhistimesleeping.
IhadnoideawhattheBloodQueentrulywasorhowPoppywasdealingwiththe
knowledgeofwhoIsbethwastoher.Thereweretoomanyunknowns,andIneeded
togetoutofhere.Ihadtogettoherbeforethatredhazedescendedagain.
Anditwascoming.Icouldalreadyfeelitintheachereturningtomybones.
Istruggledtoignoreit.To
focusonthetaskathandandsomethingIsbethhadsaidwhenshe’dgivenmethe
blood.Ithadbeenashock.Important.Butitwasonthefringesofmy
memories,existingjustoutofreachasIcurledthechainaroundmyforearm
andpulleduntilmyfeetslidoverthestone—
Thesoundofapproachingsteps
stoppedme.Theywerelight.Quick.Iheardthem.Droppingthechain,Iturned
andthenloweredmyselftothefloor,mybackagainstthewall.Ievenheard
bloodpumpingthroughveinsbeforeashadowcrossedtheflickeringcandlelight.
Hell.WhateverPoppy’stouchhadmanagedtodowasalreadyfading.
TheHandmaiden.
ChainsrattledasIleanedforward,
thethunderinmychestandinmybloodreturningandgrowinglouder.
Shesteppedintothelightof
anotherhalf-burntcandle.Thewingedmaskonherfacepaintedinblackmade
hereyesevenlighter.Morelifeless.
Butshehadlifeinher.
Blood.
Icouldhearit.
Hungry,starvingmusclestensed.
Myjawpulsed.“WhereisPoppy?”
“ShewaswiththeQueen.”The
Handmaidenkneltbythehipbath,herstarenotdriftingfarasshegrippedthe
rim.Sheknewbetterthantotakehereyesoffme.
Igrowled.
“Youdon’tlikethat,huh?”she
asked,shovingthesleevesofhergownup.
Itwistedmyheadtotheside,
fangsthrobbing.Dreadandanticipationcollidedwiththefogofhunger.My
skintightened,pullingtautagainstthehealedwounds.Theshadowstonebandsclamped
downonmywristsandankles.Getittogether.Getitthefucktogether.
Ittookeverythinginme,butthe
storminmybloodquietedasmychindropped.“If…ifshehasbeenharmed,I
willkillallofyou.”Thewordsscratchedtheirwaythroughmydrythroat.“I
willripyourfuckingthroatsout.”
“TheQueenwon’ttouchahairon
yourpreciousPoppy.”Sheinchedback,movingtotheothersideofthe
hipbath.“Atleast,notyet.”
Thesoundthatcamefrommewas
thepromiseofviolentdeath.“She’llhurtotherstohurther.”
Shestaredforamoment,motionless.
“You’reright.”
Myheadsnappedtowardthe
cell’sopening.Ididn’twantthatmonsteranywherenearPoppy,andKieranwas
here,too.Ifeitherofthemwasharmed…Theshacklesweighedmorethanever
suddenly.Watersplashed,jerkingmyattentionbacktothebath.TheHandmaiden
haddippedherhandsintothewater.
Thefogofimpendingbloodlust
waitedattheedgesofmybeingasIwatchedhergripthesidesofthetuband
bendoverthewater.“Yougoingtobathe?”
Sheglancedupatme.“Yougota
problemwiththat?”
“Idon’tgiveafuckwhatyou
do.”
“Good.”Shepluckedupamatted
curl.“I’vegotbloodinmyhair.”
TheHandmaidenthentipped
forward.Shestraight-updunkedherheadintothetub.Theonce-clearwaterimmediately
turnedaninkyblack.
Whatinthehell?Istaredinto
thegloomastheHandmaidenscrubbedherfingersthroughherhair,washingaway
whatseemedtobesomesortofdye,revealingashadeofblondsopaleitwas
nearlywhite—
Clawsscrapedoverstone.I
tensedasaCravenletoutalow-pitchedshriek.TheHandmaidentossedherhair
back,sendingafinemistofwateracrossthefloorasshegrabbedabladefrom
theshaftofherboot.Spinningonherknee,shethrewtheweapon,strikingthe
creatureinwhatwasleftofitsfaceasitrushedintothecell.Knockedback,
theCravenfellintothehall.
“TheCravenaresoannoying.”
TheHandmaidencockedherhead.Streaksofblackdyerandownhercheeks,
cuttingthroughthepaintedmaskandoverherteethasshesmiledbroadly.“I
feelsoprettyrightnow.”
“Thefuck?”Imuttered,
beginningtothinkthiswassomesortofbloodlust-inducedhallucination.
Shegiggled,turningbacktothe
hipbath.“YouknowtheQueenwon’tsendyoufoodorwater.”
“Noshit.”
Shovingherhandsintothetub,
shesplashedherfaceandcommencedscrubbingasblackdyeslowlytrackeddown
herarms.“Ihavesomethingtotellyou.Somethingveryimportant.”Herhands
muffledherwords.“Anditwillhurtyourlittleheart.”
Iwasbarelypayingattentionto
whatshesaidbecauseIwastransfixedbywhatshewasdoing.
BywhatIsawtransforming
beforeme.
Thesootyfacialpaintwas
almostallgonenow,revealingherfeatures—whatshetrulylookedlike.AndI
couldn’tbelievewhatmyeyesweretellingme.
Thehairwasn’ttherightcolor,
andthecurlsweretighter,butthefacewasthesameovalshape.Themouth
fullandwide.Shehadthesamestrongbrow.Isawfrecklesoverthebridgeof
hernoseandalloverhercheeks—muchmoreprominentandplentiful.Thewayshe
nowlookedbackatmewithaslighttiltofastubbornjaw…
Goodgods.
Allofitwasfamiliar.Too
familiar.
TheHandmaiden’ssmilewasslow
andtight.“DoIremindyouofsomeone?”
“Gods,”Irasped.
Sherose,theshouldersofthe
simpleblacktunicsheworenowsoaked.Hairthecolorofsilvery-white
moonlighthungallthewaytothemultiplerowsofleatherencasingherwaist,
exaggeratinghipsthatdidn’tneedtheaid.Shewasleaner,notsoamplyshaped,
butshestoodthereinaway…
Disbelieffloodedme.“Impossible.”
Waterdrippedfromher
fingertipsasshesilentlywalkedtowardme.“Whydoyouthinkwhatyou’re
seeingisimpossible,Casteel?”
“Why?”Ahoarselaugh
partedmydrylips.Therewasnologicalreason,otherthanthefactthatmy
mindcouldn’tacceptthatthisHandmaiden—thisRevenant—wasalmosta
mirrorimageofPoppy.ButIcouldn’tdenyit.Therewasnowayshewasn’t
relatedtomyQueen.
“Whoareyou?”Ichokedout.
“I’mthefirstdaughter,”she
said,andshitifthatwasn’tanothershock.“Iwasnevermeanttobe.Neither
wasthesecond.Butthat’sneitherherenorthereatthemoment.Iprefertobe
calledbymyactualname—Millicent.OrMillie.Eitherworks.”
“Yournamemeansbrave
strength,”Iheardmyselfsay.
“SoI’mtold.”Millicent
stareddownatme,onceagainunblinking.Eerie.“Isthatallyouhavetosay?”
Hell,no.TherewasalotIhad
tosay.Fuck.IfeltlikePoppybecauseIhadalotofquestions.“You’re…hersister,
aren’tyou?Full-blooded.”
“Iam.”
Mythoughtsraced.“Iresisyour
father,too.”
Shenodded.
Andthatalsomeant…“You’rea
goddess.”
Millicentlaugheddarkly.“I’m
nogod.WhatIamisafailure.”
“What?Ifyourfatheris—”
“Ifyou’reanythinglikeyourbrother,
thenyouthinkyouknowitall,”sheremarked.“But,justlikehim,youdon’t
knowwhatisandisn’tpossible.Youhavenoidea.”
“Thentellme.”
Millicentgavemeanother
tight-lippedsmileassheshookherhead,sendingamistofcoldwateracross
mychestandface.
Frustrationburnedthroughme,
nearlyaspotentastheencroachingbloodlust.“Whatthehell?Howareyounot
agod?”
“WherewouldIevenstartifI
answeredyourquestions?Andwhenwouldyourquestionsstop?Theywouldn’t.Every
answerIgavewouldleadtoanother,andbeforeweknewit,Iwouldhaveretold
theentirehistoryoftherealms.”Millicentblinkedandthenturnedaway,
steppingovermylegs.“Therealhistory.”
“Iknowtherealhistory.”
“No,youdon’t.NeitherdidMalik.”
Airpunchedoutofmylungsat
thesoundofmybrother’sname,momentarilystunningme.Mybrother…Ihadn’tseen
himsincehe’dwrappedmyhand.Whathe’dsaidabouttheHandmaidensurfaced:“She’s
hadverylittlechoice.”“Malikknows,”Ibitout.“Thatsonofabitch
knowswhoyouare.”
Millicentmovedquickly,
crouchingbymylegs.CloseenoughthatifIkickedout,I’dtakeherdown.She
hadtoknowthat,butsheremainedwhereshewas.“Youhavenoideawhatyour
brotherhashadtodo.Youhaveno—”Shecutherselfoffwithasharptwistof
herneck.“EverythingtheQueendoes…shedoesforareason.Whyshetookyou
thefirsttime.WhyshekeptMalik.SheneededsomeonefromastrongAtlantian
bloodlinetohelpPenellaphethroughherAscension.Tomakesureshedidn’tfail.
Sheluckedoutwhenyoucamebackintothepicture,didn’tshe?Theoneshe
originallyplannedtouse.Andthenourmotherwaiteduntil
PenellaphewasgoingthroughherCulling—that’shappeningnow.Andnowshe’s
waitingagainforPenellaphetocompletetheCulling.”
“PoppyhasAscendedtoher
godhood—”
“Shehasn’tcompletedthe
Culling,”Millicentinterrupted.“Butwhenshedoes,mysisterwillgiveour
motherwhatshe’swantedsinceshelearnedthathersonwasdead.”
“Revenge?”
“Revengeagainsteveryone.”
Millicentleanedin,placingahandbymyknee.Hervoicedroppedtoawhisper.
“Andshedoesn’twanttoremakethekingdoms.It’stherealms.She
wantstorestorethemtothewaytheywerebeforethefirstAtlantianwascreated.
WhenmortalsweresubservienttothegodsandthePrimals.Andthat—thatwill
destroynotonlythemortalrealmbutalsoIliseeum.”
Shockrippledthroughme.“And
youthinkPoppywillhelpherdothis?”
“Shewon’thaveachoice.My
sisterisdestinedtodojustthat.SheistheHarbingerforetold.”
“Bullshit,”Isnarled.“She—”
“RememberwhatItoldyou
before?Ourmotherisn’tstrongenoughtodosuchathing.Butshecreatedsomething
thatwas.Penellaphe.”
Coldairpouredintomychest.
“No.”
“It’sthetruth.”Herfeatures
pinched,andIsawitforamomentbeforehereyeslowered.Sorrow.Deep,
endlesssorrow.“Iwishitwasn’tbecauseIknowthatnomatterwhatIdo—whatanyone
does—theQueenwillsucceed.Becauseyouwillalsofail.”
Ileanedasfarasthechain
allowed.“Failatwhat?”
Millicentliftedhergazeto
mine.“Atkillingmysister.”
Ijerkedbackagainstthewall,
barelyregisteringtheburstofpainalongmyback.
“Penellaphewillcompleteher
Cullingsoon.”Millicentrose.“Then,herloveforyouwillbecomeoneofthe
very,veryfewweaknessesshewillhave.Youwillbetheonlythingthatcanstop
herthen.Ifyoudon’t,Penellaphewillhelpendtherealmsasweknowthem,
causingmillionstolosetheirlives,andsubjectingthosewhosurviveto
somethingfarworse.Eitherway,mysistercan’tsurvivethis.Shewilldiein
yourarms,orshewilldrowntherealmsinblood.”
Chapter27
Poppy
Ipacedthebedchamberthefollowingafternoon,the
mealoneoftheless-chattyHandmaidenshadbroughtindevouredonlybecauseI
couldn’taffordtoweaken.
Anotherwhitegownhadbeen
broughtinwiththefood.OptingtowearwhatIhadthedaybefore,I’d
destroyedthegownwithasparkofeather.Ishouldn’thaveusedtheessence
forsuchachildishthing,butthemomentaryjoyithadbroughtwashardto
regret.
Everysooften,Isentthe
doubledoorsaglare.Ihadn’tseenorheardfromtheBloodQueensincethey’d
returnedmetomychamberstheeveningbefore.I’dstayedinthisdamnroom,only
becauseIdidn’twanttoriskKieran’sandReaver’ssafetyinadditionto
Casteel’s.
I’dcheckedinwithKieranthrough
thenotam,lettinghimknowthatbothCasteelandIwereokay.Hewas
relieved,butthroughtheconnection,IknewhehadhisdoubtsaboutCasteel.
Ihaddoubts,aswell.
Mytouchwould’veonlybrought
himafewhoursofrelief—ifthat.Maybenoteventhatlong.AllIcoulddowas
praythathe’dbeengivenbloodandfood.Thathealingthoseinjurieshadgiven
himalongerreprieve.
I’ddesperatelytriedtosleep.
ToreachCasteel.Ihadn’tbeenableto.Theroomwastooquietandtoobig.
Toolonelyandtoofamiliar.Too—
Istoppedmyself.
Noneofthatwouldhelp.What
would,wasfocusingonwhatcamenext,whichwaswhatI’dbeenturningoverin
mymindforhours.OurplanhadbeentogetintothecapitalandfreeCasteel
andmyfather.Thatwasstilltheplan.Exceptwe’dbeentechnicallycaptured,
andIdidn’tknowwheremyfatherwasbeingkeptifnothere.
IwouldhavetoforceIsbethto
tellmewherehewaswhenIcamebackforhim.
Ihatedthat—utterlyloathed
theideaofleavingIresbehind.ButIhadtogetCasteelout,andsoon.
Becausehewasnotwell.
I’dhealedwhatinjuriesI
could,buthewasteeteringontheedgeofbloodlustandatriskoflosing
partsofhimself.Icouldn’tallowthattohappen.
SearchingoutKieran’sunique
imprint,Ifoundthecedar-richsensation.
Liessa?
Awrygrintuggedatmylips.Don’t
callmethat.
MyQueen,instead?
Isighed.Howaboutneither?
Hischuckletickleditsway
throughme.What’sgoingon?
Weneedtogetoutofhere.
Therewasapause.Whatare
youthinking?
Weneedtogettooneofthe
Temples.Casteelhastobeheldsomewherenearthere.Underground.Ipaced
bythewindow.Wehavethespell.Oncewefindtheentrancetothetunnels,
wecanuseit.It’swhatwe’dneedtodonextthatI’mnotsosureabout.
Severalmomentsofsilence
passedwhereIfeltthewoodsysensationsurroundingme.Wecantrytheway
weplannedtogetin.
Throughthemines?
Yes.Wecantrytoaccess
them.Or…
Myheartthumpedheavily.They’ll
expectthat.Theremustbeabetterway.
Fightourwayout.
Istoppedatthewindow,staring
acrossthecapital.I’mnotsurethat’sabetteroption.
Fightingwillbeouronly
optionnomatterwhat,Kieranreasoned.Eitherthroughoneofthe
gatesorfrominsidetheRiseandintothemines.
Wehasheditout,goingbackand
forthuntilKierandecided.Thequickestwayistogostraightforthe
easterngates.WehaveReaver.Wehaveyou.Wecanfight.
Iworriedmylowerlip.Ifwe
dothat—ifIdothat—weriskpeopleseeingmeasademis.Weriskthepeople
believingtheworstaboutusandfearingwhatistocome.
Wedo.Therewas
anothergulfofsilence.Butrightnow,wecan’tworryaboutthat.That’s
notourconcern.Casis.Gettingthehelloutofhereis.Andifthatmeans
takingdownapartoftheRise,thenwetakeitdown,Poppy.
Iclosedmyeyes.Theessencein
mychestthrummed.
Wecan’tsaveeveryone,
Kieranremindedme.Butwecansavetheoneswelove.
Ajoltranthroughme.I’dknown
whenspeakingwiththegeneralsthattherewasachanceourplanscouldcrumble
aroundus.Thatwe’dneedtotakedowntheRises.Thattherewouldbeuntold
lossoflife.Thatwe’dbecomethemonstersthepeopleofSolisfeared.
Andthatstoodtruenow.
Kieranmust’vesensedmy
acceptancebecausehisnextwordswere:Wejustneedadistraction.
Adistraction.Abigonethat
wouldgiveustimetomakeourwaythroughWayfairandtotheTemples.
Myeyesopened,andIfocusedon
theblackstoneoftheRise,loominginthedistance.Ihaveanidea.
MypatiencewasstretchedtoitslimitsasIsatonthe
thicklycushionedchairinthealcoveofthemainflooroftheGreatHall.A
dozenknightsandHandmaidenslinedthewallbehindme.
Thesunhadjustbeguntosetfor
theeveningwhentheBloodQueensummonedmypresence.Andyet,hereIsatas
shemingled
Iscannedthepackedfloor,the
facesofsomanymortalsblurringtogetherastheychattedandviedforafew
momentsofhertime.Shemovedamongthem,flankedbyMillicentand
anotherHandmaiden.Likeavibrantbird,rubycrownshining,shesmiledgraciously
asthemortalsbowed.Shedidn’twearwhitetonight.She,likeMillicent,was
drapedincrimson.
Iwasn’tquitesurehowthegown
remainedonherbody.Oriftheupperhalfwasmadeofsomesortofbodypaint.
Itwasthattightandsleeveless,defyinggravity.Whatnecklineithadplunged
tohernavel,revealingfarmorethanIeverwantedtosee,considering—whether
ornotIwantedtoadmitit—shewasmymother.Thelowerpartofthegownwaslooser,
butIdidn’tdarelooktoolongatthegossamerfabric.Ididn’tneedthattrauma
inmylife.
“Youlookasifyou’reenjoying
yourself.”
AtthesoundofMalik’svoice,I
stiffenedevenmore.“I’mhavingthetimeofmylife.”
Therewasabrief,roughchuckle
ashebrushedpastmychair,sittingononeoftheemptytwothatwereoneither
sideofme.“I’msureyouare.”
Isaidnothingforafewmoments.
“IhavenoideawhyshesummonedmetotheGreatHall.”
“Shewantedyoutoseehowloved
sheis,”Malikreplied.“IncasethedisplayintheGreatHallwasn’t
sufficient.”
Glancingoverathim,Iwatched
himliftaglassofredliquidtohislips.Icouldn’tbesureitwaswine.He
hadspokensoftly,buttheknightsandHandmaidenswerecloseenoughtohave
heardhim.Nooneelsewasaround.WhatI’dfeltfromhimthedaybeforepreyed
onmymindasIreturnedmyattentiontothefloor.“Ofcourse,theyloveher.
They’retheeliteofCarsodonia.Thewealthiest.Aslongastheirlivesare
easy,theywilllovewhoeversitsonthatthrone.”
“They’renottheonlyones.You
sawthatforyourself.”
Ihad.“OnlyshegivesBlessings
withAtlantianblood.”Ilookedathimagain.Heshrugged.“Somethingthat
cannothaveanylong-lastingeffects.”
Hetookanotherdrink.
“Andshehasthemafraid—”
“Ofyou,”hespoke.“The
Harbinger.”
Iforcedaslow,evenbreath.
“Whatshetoldthepeopleyesterdaywasalie.ThoseinOakAmblerandthe
othercitieshaven’tbeenabused.You,nomatterwhatyouthinknow,haveto
knowthattheAtlantians—yourfather—wouldneverhavedonewhatsheclaimed.”
Malikoncemorehadnoresponse.
“Thepeopleherewilleventually
learnthetruth,”Icontinuedintothesilence.“AndIdon’tbelievethatevery
mortalinCarsodoniabelieveshertobeabenevolentQueen.Nordotheysupport
theRite.”
Malikloweredhisglass.“You’d
berightnottobelievethat.”
Iwatchedhimclosely,opening
mysensestohimashestaredoutoverthefloor.Thecrackswerestillin
thoseshields.“IsawCasteelyesterday.”
Hisfaceshowednothing,butI
caughtthesuddentasteofsourness.Shame.
“Hewasn’tingoodshape.”I
loweredmyvoiceasIclaspedthearmsofthechair.“Hewasnearlylostto
bloodlust.He’dbeeninjuredand—”
“Iknow.”Hisjawwashard,andwhen
hespoke,hisvoicewasbarelyaboveawhisper.“IcleanedhimupthebestI
couldaftertheQueensentyousuchalovelygift.”
Malikhadbeentoseehim.
Casteelhadn’tsharedthat,but
therereallyhadn’tbeenmanyopportunitiesforhimtorelayinformation.Someone
hadwrappedhishand.Thathadtomeansomething.That,andtheraw
agonyIfeltfromMalik.Whatitmeantexactly,Iwasn’tsure.
Ileanedtowardhim,andtheshoulders
underthewhiteshirttensed.“Youknowhowtofindhim,then,”Iwhispered.
“Tellme—”
“Careful,QueenofFleshand
Fire,”Malikmurmuredwithabrittletwistofhislips.“Thatisavery
dangerousroadyou’reembarkingupon.”
“Iknow.”
Hisgazeslidtomine.“You
don’tknowmuchifyouthinkIwillanswerthatquestion.”
Itampeddowntherisingtideof
anger.“Ifeltyourpain.Tastedit.”
Amusclebegantickinginhis
jaw.“Thatwas,bytheway,veryrudeofyou,”hesaidafteramoment.“Andit
hurt.”
“Youlived.”
Hegaveashorthuffoflaughter.
“Yeah,Ilived.”Hetookanotherdrink.“That’swhatIdo.”
Thesardonictwistofhiswords
hadmestudyinghisfeatures.“Why?Whyareyouhere.Withher?It’s
notbecausesheopenedyoureyestoanything,letalonethetruth.She’snotthat
persuasive.”
Maliksaidnothingashestared
ahead,butIsawhisattentionshiftbeyondtheBloodQueentothedark-haired
Handmaiden.Itwasbrief.Iwould’vemisseditifIhadn’tbeenwatchinghimso
closely.
“It’sher.”
Hisgazeshottomine,andthen
hisexpressionslippedintoahalf-grin.“TheQueen?”
“Millicent,”Isaidquietly.
Helaughedagain,anothershort
burstofdrysound.
Isatback.“MaybeI’llaskthe
BloodQueenifshethinksyou’rehereforherorforherHandmaiden.”
Slowly,Malikleanedacrossthe
smallspacebetweenus.“Askherthat,”—thatlonedimpleappeared—“andIwill
wrapyouinthebonesofadeityandthrowyouintothegodsdamnStroudSea.”
“That’sabitofanexcessive
threat,”Ireplied,assatisfactionsurgedthroughme.Itwasexcessive.
Whichleftverylittlereasonastowhy.Hehadtocare.“It’sthekindof
reactionI’dhaveifyouthreatenedCasteel.”
Maliklookedatme.
Ismiled.“Exceptminewouldn’t
involvedeitybonesorthesea.Norwoulditbeanemptythreat.”
Hefinishedoffhisdrink.
“Noted.”Hisgazeflickedtothefloor.“Shecomes.”
TheBloodQueenapproached.
Malikrose.Ididn’t.MurmursdriftedfromthefloorasIstaredupather.Isbeth’s
featuressharpenedasshesweptpastmeandloweredherselfontothechairon
myotherside.OnlythendidMaliksit.DozensofeyeswatchedasMillicent
remainedinfrontofus,joinedbytheotherHandmaidens.Theirstraightbacks
providedaratherimpressivescreenofprivacy.
SomeonehandedtheBloodQueena
glassofbubblingwine.Shewaiteduntiltheservantdisappearedintothe
shadowsbeforesaying,“We’rebeingwatched,andtheyfindyourlackofrespect
towardaQueen—yourbehavior—tobedisgraceful.”
“Andiftheyknewthetruth
aboutyou?Aboutthethingsyou’vedone?”Iasked,watchingayoungcouplespeak
astheygazedupatthestatueofwhatIhadalwaysassumedwasNyktosbut
apparentlywasn’t.
“Idoubtthatitwouldchange
muchformostinthisroom,”shenoted.“Butweknowwhatthey’ddoiftheylearned
whoyouare.”
“AgodandnotaHarbinger.”
“Oneandthesametomany,”she
murmured.
Istiffened.“Perhaps,butIam
willingtoprovetothemthattheyhavenothingtofearfromme.”
“Andhowwillyoudothat?”
“Well,Icouldstartwithnot
takingtheirchildrenandusingthemascattle,”Ireplied.
“WasTawnyusedascattle?”She
gesturedatthecrowdwithajeweledhand.“OranynumberoftheLordsand
LadiesinWaitinattendancetonight?”
“No,theywilljustbeturned
intocreatureswhowillthenpreyuponotherswithlittleremorse.”
Herdarkgazeslidtomine.“Or
theywillculltheweakfromthemasses.”
Mylipcurled.“Youreally
believethat?”
“Iknowthat.”Shetookadrink.
Ittookalottostopmyself
fromknockingthecrystalglassfromherhand.“Andthechildrentakenduring
thelastRite?TheonesthatwerehungbeneathRedrock?”
“Servingthegods.”
“Lies,”Ihissed.“AndIcannot
waittoseeyourfacewhenallofthoseliesareexposed.”
Shegrinnedasshelookedout
overthefloor.“DoyouthinkthatIwillallowyourarmiestolaysiegetothe
capitallikeIhavetheothercities?CitiesIdon’tevenconsideraloss?”She
turnedherheadtome.“Becausethey’renotaloss.Butwhathashappenedin
thosecitieswillnotoccurhere.IfyourarmiesarriveattheRise,Iwill
linethosewallsandgateswithnewborns.Andwhateverdrakenyouhaveleft,
whateverarmiesstillstand,willhavetoburnandcutthroughthem.”
IcouldonlystareasIslowlyrealized
thatshewasserious.MyfingersdugintothearmsofthechairasthePrimal
essencethrobbeddeeplywithinme.AfainttremorranthroughmeasIstaredat
thestatue,butIonlysawthosemortalsonOakAmbler’sgatesandtheones
beneathRedrock.Besideme,MalikstretchedforwardasMillicentturned
slightly.Thecouplestandingbeforethestatuefrownedastheylookeddownto
wherethefreshlydroppednight-bloomingrosepetals…vibrated.
Thatwasme.
Myanger.
Iwasdoingthat.
Brieflyclosingmyeyes,Ireined
inmyemotions,anditwasalotlikeallthosetimesI’dworntheveilandhad
beenbroughtbeforeDukeTeerman.WhenIhadtojuststandthereandtake
whateverhedealt.Itwasalsoalotlikeclosingoffmysensestoothers.
Instead,Iclosedmyselfofffrommyemotions.Onlywhentheeather
hadcalmedinmychestdidIreopenmyeyes.Thepetalshadsettledonthe
floor.
“Smart,”theBloodQueen
whisperedasMalikrelaxed.“Iseeyouhavelearnedtocontrolthatpowerto
someextent.”
Iforcedmygriptoloosenon
thechairarms.“Isthatwhatyouwantedtotalktomeabout?Howyouwill
slaughtermorechildrenandinnocentpeople?”
“ItwillnotbeIwhoslaughters
thosemortals,”shestated.“Itwillbethearmiesunderyourcommandwhodo.”
Herstarewasintense.Ifeltittrackingovereveryinchofmyface.“Orit
willsimplybeyouwhodoesit.So,ifyouwanttoavoidthat,youwillmake
sureyourarmiesstanddown.”
Icutmygazeinherdirection.
“Nowwe’regoingtodiscussthefutureofthekingdoms?DoyouthinkIwill
negotiatewithyouwhenthisishowyouplantoproceed?”Thewordscameoutof
meinarush.“Iwon’tgiveyouAtlantia.Iwon’tordermyarmiestoretreat.
AndIwon’tletyouuseinnocentpeopleasashield.”
Herattentionshiftedtothe
Prince.“Malik,ifyoudon’tmind,Ineedtospeakwithmydaughterinprivate.”
“Ofcourse.”Malikrose,bowing
ashiseyesbrieflymetmine.Hewalkeddowntheshortsetofwidesteps,passing
Millicentashestrolledontothefloorandwasimmediatelyswampedbysmiling
LadiesandLords.
“Theyaresoverycharmedby
him,”theBloodQueensaid.“He’dhavetobeatthemoffwithastickifhe
wantedto.”
TheHandmaidenlookedawayfrom
Malik,herattentiontravelingfartheracrosstheGreatHall.
“Doyouknowwhathaskeptme
alive?”sheaskedafteracoupleofmoments.“Vengeance.”
“Thatis…entirelycliché,”I
remarked
Herlaughwassoftandshort.
“Bethatasitmay,itisthetruth.AndIimaginethereasonit’sbecomesocliché
isbecausevengeancehaskeptmanyaliveduringthedarkestmomentsoftheir
lives.Momentsthatlastyearsanddecades.Iwillhaveit.”
“ThevastmajorityofAtlantians
hadnothingtodowithwhatwasdonetoyouoryourson,”Itoldher.“Andyet,
youthinkthatcontrollingAtlantiawillsomehowgiveyouthatvengeance.It
won’t.”
“I…Imustadmitsomethingto
you.”TheBloodQueenangledherbodytowardmine.Thescentofrosesreachedme.
“IneverreallyhadanyintentionofrulingAtlantia.Idon’tneedthekingdom.
Idon’tevenwantit.Ijustwanttoseeitburn.Ended.Iwanttoseeevery
Atlantiandead.”
Casteel
Shewilldieinyourarms…
Millicent’swordskeptcycling
throughmyhead.Ihadn’tsleptsinceshe’dbeenhere.Icouldn’tstopthinking
aboutwhoshewas—whatshe’dshared.Icouldn’tdenythatshewasPoppy’s
sister.Theylookedtoomuchalike.Hell,ifthehairwasthesamecolorandMillicent
hadfewerfreckles,theycouldalmostpassastwins.Andwhatshehad
saidaboutPoppy?Whatshe’dsaidIneededtodo?
Igrowledlowinmythroat.
Fuckthat.
EvenifPoppywerepowerfulenough
towreakthekindofhavocMillicenthadwarnedof,shewouldneverdoit.That
kindofevilwasn’tinher.
MillicentmightbePoppy’s
sister,butIdidn’ttrusther.AndIdidn’ttrustadamnthingthathadcome
outofhermouth.
Footstepsechoedfrominthe
hall,jerkingmyheadup.GoldenBoyentered.Alone.Hecarriednofoodor
waterwithhim.
“Whatinthehelldoyouwant?”
Isnarled,mythroatdry.
“Iwantedtoseehowyouweredoing,
YourMajesty.”
“Bullshit.”
Hesmiled,hisfacialpaintandclothing
sodamngoldenthatheshonelikeabulboflight.“You’restartingtolook…not
sowellagain.”
Ididn’tneedthisjackasspointing
outwhatIalreadyknew.Hungergnawedatmyinsides,andIsworeIsawhis
pulsethrumminginhisneck.
ButtheRevjuststoodthere,staring.
“Unlessyou’reheretotellme
abouttheweather,”Idrawled,“youcanshowyourselfthefuckout.”
Callumchuckled.“Impressive.”
“Me?”Ismirked.“Iknow.”
“Yourarrogance,”hesaid,anda
lowrumbleradiatedfrommychestashesteppedforward.Hissmilewidened.
“You’rechainedtoawall,starvedandfilthy,unabletodoanythingtoaidyour
woman,andyetyou’restillsoarrogant.”
Anothergrowlclaweditswayup
mythroat.“Shedoesn’tneedmyaid.”
“Isupposenot.”Hetouchedhis
chest.“Shestabbedmeyesterday.Withmyowndagger.”
Aroughlaughleftme.“That’s
mygirl.”
“Youmustbeveryproudofher.”
Hekneltslowly.“We’llseehowthatchanges.”
“It’llneverchange,”Iswore,
myjawthrobbing.“Nomatterwhat.”
Hestudiedmeforafewmoments.
“Love.Suchastrangeemotion.I’veseenittakethemostpowerfulbeings
down,”hesaid.Millicent’swordsknockedaroundinmyheadagain.“I’veseen
itgiveothersunbelievablestrength.Butoutofallthemany,manyyearsI’ve
lived,I’veonlyseenlovestopdeathonce.”
“Isthatso?”
Callumnodded.“Nyktosandhis
Consort.”
Istaredathim.“You’rethat
old?”
“I’moldenoughtorememberthe
waythingsusedtobe.Oldenoughtoknowwhenloveisastrengthoraweakness.”
“Don’treallycare.”
“Youshould.Becauseit’sa
weaknessforyou.”Thosepale,unblinkingeyeswereunsettlingashell.“Youknow
how?”
Mylipspeeledback.“Ibet
you’regoingtotellme.”
“Youshould’vefedfromherwhen
youhadthechance,”hesaid.“You’regoingtoregretnotdoingthat.”
“Wrong.”I’dneverregretnot
jeopardizingPoppy’ssafety.Never.
“We’llseeaboutthat,too.”The
Revheldmystareforalongmomentandthenmoved.
Hewasquick.Ijerkedbackat
thesightofaglintofsteel.Therewasnowheretogo.Myreflexeswereshit—
Painexplodedinmychest,
takingwithittheairinmylungsinafierywave.Ametallictaste
immediatelyfilledmymouth.Ilookeddowntoseeadaggerdeepinthecenter
ofmychestandredeverywhere,coursingdownmystomach.
Iliftedmyhead,bitingout,
“Missedmyheart,dumbass.”
“Iknow.”TheRevsmiled,
yankingthedaggerfree.Igrunted.“Tellme,YourMajesty.Whathappenstoan
Atlantianwhenthere’snomorebloodcoursingthroughtheirveins?”
Thewoundfeltlikeitwason
fire,butmyinsidesweredrenchedinice.Myheartgaveasluggishlurch.
Bloodlust.Completeandabsolute.That’swhathappened.
“Ihearitmakesoneas
monstrousasaCraven.”Rising,heliftedthedaggertohismouthandranhistongue
alongtheblood-soakedblade.“Goodluck.”
Chapter28
Poppy
IwanttoseeeveryAtlantiandead.
Acoldpressofuneasesliddown
myspineasIlockedeyeswiththeBloodQueen.“EvenMalik?”
“Evenhim.”Shesippedherchampagne.
“Thatdoesn’tmeanIwillseehimdead.Oryourbeloved.Ineedyouto
workwithme.Notagainstme.KillingeitherofthemwouldonlyhinderwhatI
want.He”—shepointedherglasstowardtheclustersurroundingMalik—“andhis
brotherwillsurvivemywrath.Ihavenothingagainstthewolven.Theytoomay
liveonastheyplease,buttherest?Theywilldie.NotbecauseIblamethem
forwhatwasdonetome.IknowtheyhadnoroleinMalec’sentombmentorour
son’sdeath.Idon’teventrulyblameEloana.”
“Really?”Isaiddoubtfully.
“Don’tgetmewrong.Iloathe
thatwomanandhavesomethingveryspecialplannedforher,butshe’snotthe
onewhoallowedthistohappen.Iknowwhoistrulyresponsible.”
“Whoisthat?”
“Nyktos.”
Idrewback,stunned.“You…you
blameNyktos?”
“WhoelsewouldIblame?Malec
wantedtheheartmatetrials.Hecalledforhisfather.Evenasleep,Nyktos
would’veheardhim.Heanswered,andherefused,”shetoldme,andanotherwave
ofdisbeliefcrashedthroughme.“Becauseofthat,MalecAscendedme.Andyou
knowwhathappenednext.Idon’tjustblameEloanaorValyn.IblameNyktos.He
could’vepreventedallofthis.”
Nyktos.Hereallycouldhave.
Butforhimnottogranthissonsomethinglikethatafterseeingwhat’d
happenedwhenherefuseditbefore,andthegodhaddied,didn’tmakesense.
“Whywouldherefuse?”
“Idon’tknow.”Sheglanceddown
atherdiamondring.“IfMalecknew,henevershared.Butthewhydoesn’t
matternow,doesit?”Theskinatthecornersofhermouthtensed.“Nyktos
causedthis.”
Preventingwhathadhappenedand
beingtherootcauseweretwoverydifferentthings.Isbethblamedothersfor
everythingshedid.Herabilitytoavoidaccountabilitywasshockingly
impressive.
“Idon’tseehowyouthinkyou
canactuallyachieverevengeagainstthePrimalofLife,”Isaid.
Herlaughwasaslightaschimes
asshebrushedathickringletfromhercheek.“Nyktosappreciatesallmanner
oflife,butheisparticularlyfondoftheAtlantians.Theircreationwasaresult
oftheheartmatetrials—theproductoflove.Maleconcetoldmehis
fatherevensawtheAtlantiansashischildren.Theirlosswilldeliverthe
kindofjusticeIseek.”
Ithoughtthat,perhaps,shewas
farmoreoutofhermindthanIhadpreviouslybelieved.“AndyouthinkIwill
somehowhelpyoukillhundredsofthousandsofpeople?Isthatwhatyouwant
fromme?”
“Youalreadyhave.”
“Ihavedonenosuchthing—”
“Youhaven’t?”
Clutchingthearmsofthechair,
Ileanedtowardher.“WhatexactlydoyouthinkI’vedoneorwilldo?”
“Youranger.Yourpassion.Yoursense
ofrightandwrong.Yourlove.Yourpower.Allofit.Attheendof
theday,youarejustlikeme.Youwilldowhatyouwereborntodo,mydear
daughter.”Sheraisedherglasstome.“Youwillbringdeathtomyenemies.”
Allyouwillliberateisdeath.
Suckinginasharpbreath,I
jerkedbackfromher.ShespokeasifIhadnochoice.Asifthiswerepreordained,
andsomewordsspokeneonsagooutweighedmyfreewill.
Energypulsedinmychest,
chargingtheairaroundus.Hersmiledidn’tfalter—notonceassheflickedalong
lookaroundtheGreatHall—aroompackedwithmortals.Iknewthenthiswaswhy
she’dwaiteduntilnowtotellmethatshewantedtoseeAtlantiaburn.She’d
alreadybeguntousethepeopleasashield.
Thenagain,whenhadshenot?
Butshewaswrong.Myanger.My
senseoffairness.Mylove.Mypower.Theywerestrengths.Notfatalflawsthat
wouldresultinthedeathsofuntoldinnocents.
“You’rewrong,”Isaid,hands
tremblingasIgraspedthearmsofthechairagain.“I’mnotyou.”
“Ifthat’swhatyouneedtotell
yourself,”sherepliedwithasmileandawink.“Butifyouhadtocutdown
everyoneinthisroomtosavewhatyouholdmostdear,youwouldwithouthesitation.
JustasIhave.”
Mybreathstopped.Myheart
stuttered.Iwantedtodenywhatsheclaimed.Ineededto.
ButIcouldn’t.
Andthatstruckeveryrawnerve
inmybody.“Youmayhavegivenbirthtome,butbloodistheonlythingwe
share.We’renothingalike.Weneverwillbe.You’renotmymother,myfriend,
ormyconfidante,”Isaid,watchingthatsmilefadefromherface.“Allyouare
isaQueenwhosereignisabouttocometoanend.Thatisit.”
Thefaintglimmerofeatherappeared
inhereyesashergriptightenedonherglass.Herlipsthinned.“Idon’twant
tobeatoddswithyou,daughter.Notnow,”shesaid,andthesuddenbitter
tasteofgriefpooledinmythroat.“Butforcemyhand,andIwillforceyours
andprovejusthowmuchwearealike.”
Casteel.
ShewasthreateningCasteel.
Myskinwentascoldasthat
hollow,achingplaceinsideme,andwhenIspokeagain,myvoicesoundedlike
ithadinMassene.Smoky.Shadowy.“Icouldkillyourightnow.”
Hereyesmetmine.“Thendoit.Unleash
thatpower,child.Usethatrage.”Eatherglimmeredinhereyes.“Butbefore
youdo,rememberthatyou’renotsittingbeforeanAscended.”
Ashort,shrillscreampierced
theGreatHall,followedbythesoundofshatteringglass,andthensilence.I
twistedinthedirectionoftheshout,stomachdroppingwhenIsawthecouple
thathadstoodbythestatuesfalltotheirknees,bloodrainingfromtheir
eyesandears—theirmouthsandnoses.Louder,longerscreamsrangoutas
mortalsscatteredfromthecoupleastheyshrankintothemselves,
collapsingintonothingbutskinandbonesheldtogetherbysilkandsatin.
MalikandMillicentwhipped
towardusaspeoplecriedout,movingfartheraway.ButIsbeth…shehadn’ttaken
hereyesoffme.Notonce.Butshe’ddonethat,andthatkindofpowerwas…
Itwashorrific.
Ididn’tknowifIwascapable
ofsuchathing.Ididn’teverwanttofindout.
TheBloodQueensatback,herhead
tiltedasshestudiedme.“Ibelieveyouwillbenefitfromsometimealone.And
thentomorrow,wewillspeakfurther.”Shemotionedoneoftheknightsforward.
“Escorthertoherchambersandmakesuresheremainsthere.”
Iroseasseveraloftheknights
lefttheirstationstosurroundme.
Therewouldbenotomorrow.
Nomorediscussions.
Turningfromher,Iwalkedthe
edgesofthealcove,myhandssteadying.Instincttoldmethatwehadrunout
oftime.Itdidn’tmatterwhatshethoughtI’ddo,nordidIbelievethatI
couldquellmytemperenoughtohaltherhand—tostopherfromsenselessly
harmingothers.InstinctalsotoldmethatIsbethwouldn’tgoforCasteel
immediately.Shehadtwootherstoslaughterbeforeresortingtothat.
Kieran.
AndReaver.
ShewoulddoittoprovethatI
wasasunstableandcruelasshewas.
Allyouwillliberateis
death.
Thoughmaybesheknewmebetter
thanIknewmyself.Maybetheprophecywasexactlyassheandothersbelieved.
PerhapsWillawaswrong,andVikterhadbeensenttoguardsomethingevil.Perhaps
IwastheHarbinger.
Becauseifshedidasshe
threatened,IwoulddrowninthebloodIspilled.
ThatmeantIwasoutof
time.
IsearchedforKieran’simprint
andsenthimaquickmessage.Weneedtomakeourmovetonight.
Hisresponsewasimmediateand
fullofresolve.AttheentrancetotheGreatHall,Ilookedovermyshoulder,
findingtheBloodQueenstandingbeyondthealcove,thefinecrystalglass
stillinhandasshewatchedmelikethepredatorshethoughtshewas.
Ilookedaway,mywillforming
inmymind.Theeatherpulsedinmychest.
TheglasstheBloodQueenheld
shattered,remindingherthatnoafraid,submissiveMaidenhadsatnexttoher.
Themoonhadfounditsplaceintheskyoverthecity,
itslightdrenchingtherollingwatersoftheStroudSea.Istoodatthewindow.
BeyondtheinnerwallsofWayfairandtheTemplesofNyktosandPerses,the
Riseloomed.
ItwasthetallestRiseofthem
all,nearlyashighasWayfairCastle.Hundredsoftorcheslinedthelandjust
beyondtheRise,theirflamesvibrantandsteady,servingasabeaconofsafety
andapromiseofprotection.Theywereallaflame.
Adistraction.
Abigone.
Ithoughtofthemist—howit
swirledaroundtheCravenandblanketedtheSkotosMountains.ItwasPrimal
magic.Anextensionoftheirbeingandwill.Which,Ifigured,meantitcould
besummoned.
Ididn’tknowifthiswould
work.Iwasn’taPrimal,butIwasthePrimal’sdescendant.His
essencecoursedthroughmyveins.Thedrakenansweredmywill.ThePrimalnotam
connectedmetothewolven.
Placingmyhandsonthestonewindow’s
ledge,Iclosedmyeyesandcalledtheeathertothesurface.Theessenceanswered
inanexhilaratingrushasIpicturedthemistinmymind,thickandcloud-like
asitwasintheSkotos.Isawitseepingoutfromtheground,growingandexpanding.
MyskinwarmedasIimagineditrollingacrossthehillsandmeadowsoutside
thecapital,thickeninguntilitobscuredeverythinginitspath.Ididn’tstop
thereasIopenedmyeyes.
Silverysparkscrackledacross
myskinasIstaredattheRiseandwaited,remindedofadifferentnightand
city,adifferentmewhobelievedintheprotectionoftheRise.That
safety.
AflamebeyondtheRisebeganto
ripplewildly.Theeatherswirledthroughme,overmeasIcontinuedcallingthemistforth.Summoningit.Creatingit.
Theflamebesidethefirstbegan
todance,andthenanotherandanotheruntilthewholemassrippledina
frenzy,spittingembersdozensoffeetineverydirection.Thetwotorchesatthe
endofthelinewerethefirsttogoout,andthentheyallwentoutinquick
succession,plungingthelandbeyondtheRiseintoutterdarkness.
Flamessparkedallalongthe
wall.Burningarrowswereliftedandfired.Theyarcedthroughthenightandthen
plummeteddown,slammingintothetrenchesoftinderthattraveledtheentire
lengthoftheeasternwall.Fireerupted,castinganorangeglowovertheland…
Andoverthethick,swirling
mistseepingtowardthetrenches.Mistthatslippedunderthetinderandover
theflames,blanketingituntilitsthickweightchokedthelightfromthe
fire.
MistthatanyontheRiseorin
thecitywouldbelievetobefullofthetwistedformsoftheCraven.
HornsblewfromtheRise,shattering
thenight,butIdidn’tstopthere.
Icontinuedcallingthemist
forwardandI…Ifeltitanswer,rushingtothefootoftheRise.It
spreadoutalongthemassivestructure.IheardshoutsasIsawthemist
climbinginmymind,billowinguntilitreachedthebattlementsandtowers
alongtheRise.
AndthenIsawitbeforeme,becoming
acloudy,milky-whitecurtainagainstthenightsky.
Mybreathcaughtatthesightof
it.TherewouldbenoCraveninthatmist.Itwouldn’tcauseharm.Thatwasn’tmy
will.Itwouldonlyincitechaosandconfusion.
Ithadalreadystartedasanother
hornblew.
ThePrimalmistcrestedtheRise
inagreatwave,spillingoverandstreamingdownthesides.Distant,panicked
screamsrenttheairasthefogpouredintoCarsodoniaandfilledthestreets.
Theshoutsoffearsoundedcloserandlouderasthemistfloodedthedistricts
andbridges,swampingthehillsandvalleysuntilitswallowedtheinnerwalls
ofWayfair.
Isteppedbackfromthewindow,
liftingthehoodasIturned.Slidingthestrapofthesatchelundermycloak
andacrossmybody,Iunsheathedthewolvendagger.
Itwastimetofightourwayout.
Chapter29
Stalkingtowardthedoor,Ishutdownmyemotions—that
senseofrightandwrong.IhadtodoitifIhadanyhopeoffindingCasteel
andescaping.
Icurledmyfingersaroundthe
goldhandle.Eatherfloodedmyveinsandsparkedfrommyfingers.Thinwispsof
shadowsstreakedthesilveryaura.Itwasslightlyunnervingtosee.Theenergy
washedoverthemetal,meltingthelock.Openingthedoor,Istepped
outintothehall.
ARoyalKnightturned,eyes
wideninginsurpriseabovetheblackgaitercoveringthelowerhalfofhisface.
Isnappedforward,thrustingthedaggerabovetheplatesofarmorandthrough
thevulnerablebaseofhisthroat.Iwrenchedmyarm,severingthevampry’s
spinalcolumn.Theknightdroppedasanotherreachedforhissword.
Mywillformedinmymindand
becamereality.Theblackmantledrapedovertheknight’sshoulderswhipped
forwardandlifted,wrappingitselfaroundhisface.Idippedunderhis
outstretchedswordashestaggeredback.HismuffledshoutendedabruptlyasIshoved
thedaggerintohisside,betweenthearmoredplates.Thebloodstonechiseled
throughcartilageandsankdeepintothevampry’sheart.
Thecastle’swallsstartedto
trembleasthethickirondoorsbeganloweringonthemainfloor.Twomore
knightssteppedoutfromthehall’sshallowalcoves,swordsalreadydrawn,and
gaitersloweredtopoolattheirchins.“Wehaveordersnottokillyou,”one
said,steppingforward.“Butthatdoesnotmeanwewon’thurtyou.”
Ididn’tevendignifythatwith
aresponseasIprowledforward,vampryblooddrippingfromthetipofmydagger.
Mywillstretchedoutsideofme.Shadow-tingedauraspilledout.Theknights
liftedfromthefloorasifgianthandshadgrabbedthembytheirankles,
slammingthemintothestonefloorandthenhighabove,againsttheceiling.
Stoneandbonecracked,shatteringbeneaththearmor.
Doorsflungopenattheendof
thehall.Ahalf-dozenknightsrushedfromthetower,haltingassharpscreams
ofalarmechoedfromdistantpartsofthecastle.Someglancedbehindthem.
Othersbaredtheirfangs,chargingtowardme.
Allofthemwereinmyway.
Andtimewasprecious.
Ikeptmyemotionsandthoughts
lockeddown.Ididn’tthinkaboutwhatImustdo—whatIwoulddo.
TherewouldbetimelatertodwellonthecarnageIwasabouttounleash—and
alreadyhad.
Theshadowy,silverywebbing
racedacrossthefloor,climbingthewallsandceiling.Itfelluponthe
knights,seepinginsidethemandfindingthejointsintheirbones,thefibers
intheirmusclesandorgans,vitaleventovamprys.Therewasnochanceforthem
todoanythingwiththeswordsthey’ddrawn,toshoutoutawarningtoothers.
Ortoevenscream.
Itorethemapartfromtheinside,
notallowingmyselftothinkabouthowsimilaritwastowhatIsbethhaddone.
Theycollapsedintothemselves,fallingtothefloorinpilesoflimparmorand
emptyskin.
Allbutone.
ARevenantwasamongthem,standing
beyondtheruinedbodies.Istartedforward,pullingtheeatherbackin.
Hisdarklaughwasmuffled.
“Harbinger.”
“Goodevening.”
Hechargedme,andIdippedlow,
grabbingafallenswordfromtheground.Ahandgraspedmyshoulderthroughthe
cloakasItwisted.TheRevenantjumpedback,expectingmetokick,butthat
wasn’twhatI’dplanned.Ishottomyfeet,spinningasIdrewthesword
throughtheairinawidearc,bringingthebladeacrosstheRevenant’sgaiter-covered
neck,severingthespineandthehead.
AstheRevenantfell,Ireally
wishedtherewastimetoseeexactlyhowtheyregrewtheirheads,butthere
wasn’t.Ienteredthestairway,leavingahallwayofdeathbehind.
Racingdownthewide,spiraling
stairsoftheturret,Istartedtocounttheseconds.Hopefully,mymemoryserved
mecorrectly,andthisstairwellemptiednearthekitchensandbreezeways.IfI
werewrong,therewouldbealotmorespacetotravel…
Andalotmoredeath.
Onthethird-floorlanding,the
doorswungopen,bangingoffthewallasKieranwalkedthrough.Blooddotted
hisfaceandthroat,butIpickedupnosignofpainfromhim.
“Youdidthat?”hedemanded.
“Themist?”
Inodded.“Ididn’tknowifit
wouldwork.”
HestaredasIcamedownseveral
moresteps.“Yousummonedthemist,Poppy.”
“Iknow.”
“Iknowofonlytwothingsthat
candothat.TheCraven,”hesaid,hiseyeswide,“andthePrimals.”
“Well,nowyouknowofthree
things.Where’sReaver?”Iasked,knowingthatthedrakenwould’veansweredmy
will.
“Whereverthosescreamswere
comingfrom,”heanswered,liftingthehoodofhiscloak.
Oh,dear.
“Weneedtotalkaboutthewhole
mistthinglater.”Kieranstarteddownthestairs.“Howmuchtimedoyouthink
wehavebeforewe’relockedin?”
“Lessthanaminute.”
“We’dbetterhurrythen,”Kieran
saidasadoorflewopenonthefloorbelow,blownoffitshinges.
MybrowsroseasReaverentered
thestairwell.Hisfaceandclothingweren’tsprinkledwithblood.Theyweredrenched
initashelookedupatusfromthefloorbelow.
Kieransighed.“Well,I’mglad
thatwasn’toneofmyshirts.”
Thedrakensmiled,revealing
blood-smearedteeth.“Sorry,”herepliedasIsheathedthedagger.“I’mamessy
eater.”
Idecidedthatwassomethingelse
Iwouldthinkaboutlateraswejoinedhim,andKieranhastilyfilledhiminon
theplans.
“Aboutdamntimewe’remakinga
move,”Reaversaid.“Iwasbeginningtowonderifweweregoingtomovein.”
Isnortedatthat.
“There’sgoingtobealotof
guards,”Kieranwarnedaswearrivedatthemainfloor.
“I’llhandleit,”Isaid,notallowing
myselftothinkaboutwhatthatmeant.Ifwedidn’tgetoutofthecastlebefore
itlockeddown,Iwouldhavetoblowthroughwallsandpeople—wallsthat
protectedthemortalsthatservedwithinWayfair.Maybetheknightswould
simplystepaside.Strangerthingshadhappened.
“AndifthereareRevenants?”
Kieranquestioned.
“ThenI’llhandlethat,”Reaver
answeredasIpushedopenthedoubledoors.
Awidehallwaygreetedus,filled
withthelingeringscentoftonight’ssupper.Iturnedtomyleft,relieved
whenIsawthedarknessbeyondthedoorstothebreezeways.Thereliefwasshort-lived.
Theheavyirondoorhadrockedintoplace,beginningtolower.
Kieranwasright.Two-dozenor
soknightspackedthecrimson-banneredhall.Sodidservants.Theystoodamong
theknights,clutchingbasketsandplattersofemptydishes,theirfearevident
intheirexpressionsandscratchingagainstmyshields.Iwasn’tsureifitwas
themistatthewallsoftheRise,theknights,or…Reaver’sblood-drenched
face.ButtherewasnosignofanyRevenants.
Wherewerethey?
Theknightsknewimmediatelywho
wewere,evenwithKieran’sandmyfaceshidden.AnyhopeIhadthattheymight
stepasidewasquicklysquashedasoneoftheknightslurchedforward,grabbing
ayoungservantboy.Dishestoppledfromthetray,shatteringontheflooras
theknightjerkedtheboyback,foldingacurvedbladeacrosstheboy’sneck.Several
otherknightsdidthesame,grabbingtheno-longer-frozenservants.Theyhauled
thepanickedmortalsforward,anditremindedmeofyetanothernight—onethat
hadtakenplaceinNewHaven.
Myinsideswentcold.
“Takeanothersteptowardus—”a
knightbegan,holdingthetremblingboyinplace.Tearstrackedtheservant’s
cheeks,buthemadenosound.“Andwe’llkillthem.Allofthem.Thenwe’ll
killthewolvenandwhateverthehellthatotherthingiswithyou.”
“I’dbeoffendedbythat
statement,”Reaverremarked,“ifwhatwasleftofyoursoulswasn’tabouttobe
usheredintothewaitingAbyss.”
Iinhaleddeeply,andthe
essenceofthePrimalgodjoinedwithmywill.Theshadow-tinged,silver
webbingattackedtheweaponsfirst,crushingthebladesondaggers,knives,and
swords.
StillnoRevenantsamongthem.
“Theshadowsareback,”Kieran
notedunderhisbreath.
“Iknow.”Iwentafterthe
knightsnext,breakingthemapartuntilnothingremainedofthembutcrumpled
heaps.Withinafewheartbeats,onlytheservantsstoodbeforeus.Theydidnot
movenorspeakawordaswemovedpastthem,buttheirfear…ithadamplified
andgrown,crashingthroughmyshields,andsettlingheavilyinmychest.
TheknowledgethatIhad
frightenedthem,thattheystaredatme,believingmetobeexactlywhatIsbeth
hadwarnedthepeopleof—theHarbinger—weighedonme.Thatterrorfollowedme
outontothemist-blanketedbreezeways,intotheheavilyfloral-scentedair.
Therosegardenswerenear.Heartthumping,Iturnedasanirondoorrattledinto
place,sealingupthoseinsidethecastle.Istaredatthedoors.ManyoftheAscended
wereinthere.Shewasintherewithallthedeathwehadleftbehind.
“Thisway,”Kieranspoke,
steppingoutfromthebreezewayandintothethickmist.
Mythroatdriedasthelights
abovewentout,plungingthebreezewayintodarkness.Ipulledmyattention
fromWayfair,andmythoughtsfromwhatI’ddoneinside.
OnlyCasteelmatteredrightnow,
andwestillneededtogetpasttheinnerRiseandtooneoftheTemples.
Wetookoffforthegatefacing
thecity,runningpastthevine-coveredwallsofthegarden—aplaceI’dspent
manydaysinasachild.Itbeckonedlikeanightmarenow,butanotherhaunt
emergedbeforeus.“Ihavenoideahowlongitwilltakeforthemistto
dissipate,”Iwarnedthem.
“It’snotwindy,soIimagineit
willlingerforabit,”Kieransaid.“Hopefully,longenoughforustofindCas
andgettothegates.”
“Idon’tthinkwe’llgetthat
lucky,”Reaversaid.“Wewould’veifyou’dusedthemistforanythingother
thanconfusingpeople.”
“Ididn’twanttoharmanyone,”
Itoldhim.
“Andthatiswhywehavetorely
onluck,”hereplied.
RoyalKnightsstoodatthegates
betweenWayfairCastleandthehomesoccupiedbythewealthiestofCarsodonia.
Weslowed,knowingthemistonlycloakedusmomentarily.
Wewerefreeofthecastle,but
itwouldtaketheBloodCrownnoamountoftimetorealizethatweweremissing,
andthattherewasnothingintheunnaturalmist.Then,theentirecitywould
befullofknightsandmore.
Isteppedahead,butKierancaught
myhand.“Ifyoukeepusingtheessence,you’regoingtoweaken,”hereminded
me.“AndCaswillneedtofeedsoon.Youneedtoconserveyourenergy.”
MymuscleslockedtightasI
foughttheurgetotapintotheeatherandmakequickworkofwhatlayahead.
“You’reright.”
“Iknow.”Hesqueezedmyhand.
“ButIappreciateyouactuallyadmittingit.”
“Shutup,”Imuttered,slipping
mydaggerfree.“Doesn’tmeanIcan’tfight.”
“No.”Kieran’sgriptightened
oncemore,andthenheletgo.“Itdoesn’t.”
Anticipationtightenedmymuscles
astheRoyalKnightssensedussecondsbeforeweleftthedarknessandneared
thetorch-litgates.
Reaverlaunchedoutofthe
night,ablurofcrimsonandsunashestreakedacrossthefire-litground.He
grabbedtheclosestknight…
Iquicklylearnedexactlyhow
he’dgottensobloody,andIsortofwishedIhadn’t.
Hegrabbedthefrontofthe
knight’sgaiter,yankingitdownasheopenedhismouth—hiswideandgaping
mouthfullofteeththatnolongerremotelyresembledamortal’s.Hishead
snappeddown,andhetoreintotheknight’sthroat—intotissueandmuscle.Tore
straightthroughbone.BloodgeyseredasReaverbitthroughtheknight’s
godsdamnspine.Mymouthwantedtodropopen,exceptImight’vevomitedifI
hadallowedit.
“Remindmetostopantagonizing
him,”Kieranmurmured.
“Uh-huh.”
Reavertossedtheknightaside
andthensprangintotheair,landingseveralfeetaheadinacrouchasoneof
theknightsstalkedforward,facefreeofclothandsmirking.Thescentofstale
lilacsrose.
“Revenant,”Iwarned.
“Funtimesareover,”the
Revenantsaid,liftingaheavybroadsword.
“Wrong.”Reaverrose.“Funtimes
havejustbegun.”Heexhaled.
Istumbledtotheside,bumping
intoKieranasapowerfulstreamofsilverflamespouredoutofReaver’smouth.
IthittheRevenant,andthenheturned,strikingtwoknights.Theywentupin
flames.Screaming,theyflailedabout,managingtocatchanotherknightonfire
intheprocess.
Laughing,Reaverturnedand
caughtaknight’sarmbeforehecouldmakeuseofhissword.Thedrakentwisted
sharply,crackingbone.Theknight’showlofpainstoppedabruptlyasReaver
wentforhisthroat.
Heyankedhisheadbackandturned
tous,spittingoutamouthfulofblood.“Areyoutwojustgoingtostand
there?”
“Maybe,”Kieranmurmuredas
Reaverdroppedtheknight.
Icameoutofwhateverstunned
stuporIwasinasseveralknightschargedus.Everythingwashappeningso
fast,therewasnotimetodeterminewhowasandwasn’taRevenant.Ishot
forward,graspingaknight’sswordarm.Twistinghard,Ispunaround,usinghis
weightandmomentumagainsthim.ThecloakwhippedaroundmylegsasIturned
andflippedtheknightontohisback.
Kieranwastheresuddenly,bringing
adaggerdownonthefallenknight’sarm,piercingstraightthrough.Dipping
down,Ipickedupthefallenbloodstonesword.Sheathingmydagger,Iroseasa
knightswunghisswordstraightformyhead.
Imettheblow,theimpact
jarring.Theknight’sblackclothgaitermuffledhisgrowlasIkickedout,
catchinghimlow—betweenthelegs.Hehowled,losinghisbalance.Iswung,
bringingtheswordacrosshisthroat.BloodsprayedmycheeksasKieranletout
agruntofpain.Heartlurching,Iwhirledaround.
AknighthadpiercedKieran’sshoulder
withhissword.Hecaughttheknight’sarm,stoppinghimfromthrustingthe
bladeanydeeper.Istartedtowardthem—
Astreamofsilveryflames
rippledthroughtheair,slammingintotheknight.Themanscreamed,dropping
theswordashestaggeredaway,sweptupintheunnaturalfire.
“Areyouokay?”Iasked,
reachingforKieran.
Hecaughtmyhand.“I’mfine.
Barelyafleshwound.”
Iopenedmysensestohim,
feelingthehot,stingingpain.Itmaybejustasmallwound,butitwas
hurtinghim.“Icanhealit—”
“Later,”heinsisted.“Weneed
tofindCas.That’stheonlythingthatmatters.”Hecockedhisheadtoward
Reaver.“Thanks,man.”
“Whatever,”thedrakenreplied,
stalkingforward.“Idon’twanttheLiessatobeupset.”
ThetensionaroundKieran’s
mouthloosenedintoahalf-grinashefollowedthedraken,hishandstill
wrappedfirmlyaroundmine.
“Casteelisn’ttheonlyonethat
matters,”Itoldhimaswehurriedalongunderthecanopyofjacarandatrees.
“Sodoyou,Kieran.”
Theheavilyblossomedbranches
andthemistweretoothickforthemoonlighttopenetrate,butIfelthis
stareasIchanneledenergyintohim.Asthethreeofuspassedthestately
manorsthathadgonecompletelydarkandquietastombs,Ihealedhiswound.
OnlywhenIcouldnolongerfeelhispaindidIpullmyhandfree.Heheldon
foramomentandthenletgo.
Wecameuponthefinalinterior
wallandgate,thesectionguardedbyRiseGuards.Onlyhalfadozenwereon
thegroundasmosttraveledthebattlementsontheouterRisesurroundingthe
city.
Anarrowzingedthroughthe
mist,firedfromgroundlevel.Reaver’shandsnappedout,catchingtheshaftof
theprojectile.Heturnedhisheadtowardtheguards,hisblueeyesluminousas
hispupilsbecamethin,blackslits.
“Seriously?”Reaverheldthe
arrowbeforehimandblewoutabreath—asmokybreaththatsparkedandthenquickly
ignited.Anarrowtrailofsilverflamespartedthemist,obliteratingthe
projectile.“Who’snext?”
Theguardsscrambledintothe
fog,droppingtheirweaponsandleavingtheirhorsesbehind.
“Clevermortals,”Reaver
remarked.
“Now,whycouldn’ttheknightshave
donethat?”Iasked.
“Becausewedon’tthreatenthe
mortals’foodsource.”Thedrakenprowledforward,eyeingtheguardswhohad
shrunkagainstthewallasiftheywereattemptingtobecomeonewithit.“I’m
watchingyou.Allofyou.Keepbeingcleverandyou’llsurvivethisnight.”
NoneofthemmovedasKieraneyed
thehorses.“Weshouldstayonfoot,”Iadvisedasweenteredtheroadskirting
thewalledfortknownasEastfall.“Everyonewillbeheadinginside.Thehorses
willdrawattentionasthemiststartstofade.”
“Goodcall.”Kierankepta
watchfuleyeonthewalledfort.“Whereshouldwego?”
Iscannedthemist-coveredroad
ahead.“IfCarsodoniaisanythinglikeOakAmbler,therehastobeanentrance
tothetunnelsystem.”
“Agreed,”Kieransaid.“Doyou
knowwhichoneisclosest?”
“IthinktheTempleofNyktosis.
Weshouldstartthere.”
“TheShadowTemple,”Reaversaid,
lookingup.
IglancedatReaver.“Thewhat?”
“That’swhattheTemplewas
originallyknownaswhenthiskingdomwascalledLasania.TheSunrepresented
thePrimalofLife,andtheShadowrepresentedthePrimalofDeath,”hesaid.
IhadnoideathatthoseTemples
werethatold.Thenagain,Icouldn’trememberifmyparentshadever
takenIanandmetothembeforeweleftCarsodonia.Ihadn’tbeenallowedto
entereitherplaceofworshipwhenundertheBloodQueen’sguardianship.
I’dneverbeenallowedtoleave
thecastlegrounds.
“TheoneyoucalledtheShadowTemple,”
Iasked,“isitintheareaoftheGardenDistrictne—?”
“Sitsattheedgeofa
neighborhoodknownastheLuxe,”Reaverfinishedforme.
Ishothimafrown.“Yeah.”
Reaverclearedabitofthe
bloodfromhisfacewithaswipeofhisforearm.“IthinkIrememberhowtoget
there.”
“HowfamiliarareyouwithCarsodonia?”
I’dlivedhereforyearsandamuchshortertimeagothanReaver.Whenhespoke
ofLasaniaandIliseeum,he’dmadeitsoundasifhehadn’tbeenineithervery
long.
“Familiarenoughtorememberthe
way,”hereplied,andthatwasallhesaid,leavingjusthowfamiliar
hewasamystery.WepickedupourpaceandsteeredclearofEastfall.The
dormitoriesweresilent.Thosetrainingtherehadmostlikelybeensenttothewall
orbeyondtodealwithwhattheybelievedwasaCravenattack.
Itossedtheswordasideaswe
reachedtheoutskirtsoftheLuxe—aneighborhoodIrememberedbeingknownfor
itslavishrooftopgatheringsandhiddendensIwasn’tsupposedtoknowabout.Reaver
ledusstraightintooneofthevine-coveredpassagewaysthatIanusedtotalk
about.He’dbeenallowedtoleaveWayfairandexplorethemwhenwewereyounger,
soIonlyeverheardofthetrellisedtunnelsthatsnakedthroughoutthe
entiretyoftheGardenDistrict,leadingtoanywhereyouwantedtogo.
Thedistantsoundofashrill
screamshatteredtheeeriesilenceofthecity.Thekindonlyonecreature
couldmake.
ACraven
“Gods,”Iwhispered.“Themist.
ItmusthavebeckonedtheCravenfromtheBloodForest.Ididn’t…”
Ihadn’tthoughtofthat.
“Luckisonoursidethen,”
KieransaidfrombehindmeaswefollowedReaverthroughatunnelheavywithsweet
peablossoms.“Thiswillkeepthemoccupied.”
“Agreed,”Reaverchimedin.
Theywereright.Butwherethe
Cravenwere,deathawaited.Iclampedmyjawshut.Ihadn’twantedthat,butdeath…
Shewasanoldfriend,as
Casteelhadoncesaid.
“Don’tthinkaboutit.”Kieran’s
handcurvedovermyshoulder.“We’redoingwhatwehaveto.”
Itwasalmostimpossiblenotto
thinkabouttheconsequences.WhatiftheCravenmanagedtogetovertheRise
hereliketheyhadtriedbeforeinMasadonia?TheRisehadneverfailed,butas
farasIknew,aPrimalmisthadneverswampedCarsodoniabefore,either.
Reaver’sstepsslowedaswe
clearedthesweetlyscentedpassageway,andIsawthatnoteventhePrimalmist
daredtocloakNyktos’Temple.Itwastheonlythingvisible.
TheTemplesatinthefoothills
oftheCliffsofSorrowandbehindathickstonewallthatencircledtheentire
structure.Thestreetwasemptyaswecrosseditandpassedthroughtheopen
gate,trekkingacrossacourtyardconstructedofshadowstone.Icouldn’t
suppressashudderasIlookedupatthetwistingspiresthatstretchednearly
ashighasthecliffs,theslenderturrets,andsleek,pitch-blackwalls.At
night,thepolishedshadowstoneseemedtolurethestarsfromthesky,
capturingthemintheobsidianstone.TheentireTempleglitteredasifahundred
candleshadbeenlitandplacedthroughout.
Weclimbedthewidesteps,
crossingbetweentwothickpillars.Thedoorswereopenwide,leadingtoa
long,narrowcorridor
“IfthisTempleisanythinglike
theoneinOakAmbler,theundergroundentrancewouldlikelybebehindthemain
chamber,”Kieransaid.
“TherecouldbePriestsand
Priestesses,”Iremindedthemaswestrodeforward.
“Howshouldwehandlethem?”
Kieranasked.
“Burnthem?”
IshotReaveralook.“Ifthey
don’tstandintheway,thenleavethembe.”
“Boring,”hereplied.
“Theycouldwarnothersthat
we’rehere,”Kieranpointedout.“Wedon’thavetokillthem,butwewillneed
tokeepthemsilent.”
Inoddedaswewalkedtowardthe
cella—themainchamberoftheTemple.Moonlightstreamedinthroughtheglassceiling,
streakingthejetfloorsinsoftlight.NoPriestsorPriestessescouldbe
seen.Onlyafewdozenofthehundredsofcandelabrasstaggeredalongthewalls
werelit.Therewerenopewsorbenchesforworshiperstogather.Therewas
justthedaisandwhatsatupontheraisedplatform.
I’dneverseensuchathrone
before.
Carvedfromshadowstone,itwas
largerthanthethronesinbothEvaemonandhere.Massive.Moonlightcaressed
thechair,glintingoffthebackcarvedtoresembleacrescentmoon—justlike
thethronehadbeeninWayfair.
“DidNyktoseversituponthis
throne?”Iwhispered.
“Onlyforabrieftime.”Reaver
strodeforward.
Icrossedintothecella.“Why
isthereonlyone—?”
Theunlitcandlesroaredtolife,
castingbright,silvery-whitelightthroughoutthecella.Hairroseonthenape
ofmyneckandundermyhoodasIlookedaround.
Kieranhaltedbehindme.“That
was…odd.”
“It’sher.”Reavercontinuedon,
headingfortherightsideofthedais.
“Me?”
“Youcarrythebloodofthe
Primalinyou,”hesaid.“Andyou’reinthePrimal’sTemple.It’sreactingto
yourpresence.Theessencelefthere.”
Allofthatsoundedsilly,
excepttherewasanenergytothecella,onethatcoatedtheveryair
Ibreathedandcrackledovermyskin.Theeatherinmychesthummed.
“You’resoveryspecial.”Kieran
gavemeahalf-grinasweedgedaroundthedais.
“Very,”Reaversaiddryly.
Iglaredatthedraken’sback.
“Neitherofyousoundlikeyouthinkthatatall.”
“Sospecial,”Kieran
added.
Irolledmyeyesaswepasseda
colonnade.Isawseveraldoors,allclosed.Tenoftheminall.Frustration
burnedthroughmeasIscannedthearea.“Youwouldn’thappentoknowwhich
doorweshouldtry,wouldyou?”
“No.”Reaverstopped.“That
spell?Youthinkitwillworkfromhere?”
Iwasn’tsure.I’dwantedtouse
itoncewewereunderground,butLordSvenhadsaidthatthespellwouldremain
inplaceuntilthemissingobject—orperson—wasfound.Plus,thelastthingwe
neededwastostartrandomlyopeningdoorsandpotentiallycomingface-to-facewith
thePriestsandPriestessesthathadtobeheresomewhere.Wewouldhavetotry
itandhopeforthebest.
“Icandoithere.”Ireached
forthesatchel,hopingthatIwasrightabouttherebeingaccesstothe
tunnelsbeneaththeTemples.“Ijustneed—”
Reaverspunsuddenly,atthe
samemomentKierandid.They’dheardthesilentstepsbeforeIdid.Iturned,
reachingforthedaggerasahoodedfigureappearedintheshadowsbetweenthecolumns.
Heblendedinsowell,Ialmostdidn’tseehimatfirst.
Kieranliftedhissword,andmy
heartkickedinmychest.Thatfigure,theheightandtheshapeandthevoice.
“Noneedtousethatsword,”the
hoodedfigureadvised,thevoicesendingajoltofrecognitionthroughme.Malik.
Butitwassomethingelse…
“We’regoingtohavetoagreeto
disagreeonthat,”Kierangrowled.
“Ican’tblameyouforthinking
that.”Handsrose,liftingthehoodback.Brightambereyesflickeredoverthe
threeofus.“IsawyouallmakingaratherhastyexitfromWayfairandrunning
intothemist—leavingquitethemessbehind.”
Kieran’schinhadlowered,his
holdontheswordsteady.“Isthatso?”
Maliknodded,keepinghishands
visibleandathissides.“ThoughtIshouldgiveyouallafollow.I’mtheonly
one.Fornow.Itwon’tbelongbeforeyourabsenceisnoted.”Hepaused.“I
knowwhyyou’rehere.”
“Congratulations,”Kieran
snapped.“Allthatmeansisyou’reaninconvenienceI’monlyalittle
conflictedabouthandling.”
ThePrince’sgazeshiftedto
mine.“YouaskedmeearlierifIknewhowtogettoCas.Ido,”hesaid,andmy
sensesstretchedouttohim.Therewerenoshields.Nuttyresolvegatheredin
mythroat.“That’swhyI’mhere.I’lltakeyoutohim,andthenyouallneedto
getthehelloutofthecity.”
“Yeah,”ReaverdrawledasKieran
glancedatme.“Howconvenientofyoutoshowupandbesohelpful.”
“Notconvenience.Justa
huge-assrisk.”Malik’sgazedidn’tleaveme.“Youcansensemyemotions.You
cantellI’mnotheretotrickyou.”
“WhatIcanfeeldoesn’t
determineifyou’relying.Especiallyifyou’repurposelyhidingyouremotions
undertheguiseofanother.”
“I’mnot.”Hesteppedforward,
stoppingwhenKieranliftedtheswordhigher,pointingitatMalik’schest.A
musclethrobbedinhistemple.“IaidedCasaftershesentthatgift
toyou.Didmybesttogetridoftheinfectionhisbodycouldn’tfight.
Whetheranyofyouwanttobelieveitornot,Idon’twantmybrotherhere.I
don’twanthimanywherenearhere.Youneedtotrustmeonthat.”
“Trustyou?”Kieran’slaughwas
harsh
“Wedon’thavetimeforthis,”
Reaverargued.“Eitherkillhimormakesurehecan’tbetrayus.”
Malik’seyesflaredbrightly.
“It’sher.You’reright.I’mherebecauseofher.”
Itastedtangy,almostbitteranguish
again.Itwaspowerful,butwhatcutthroughitwassweet,remindingmeofchocolate
andberries.
Iinhaledsharply.“Millicent.”
Kieranfrowned.“The
Handmaiden?”
Henodded.“Nearlyeverything—”
Malik’svoiceroughened.“NearlyeverythingI’vedoneisforher.She’smyheartmate.”
Mymouthdroppedopen.Ihadn’t
beenexpectingthat
“Whatintheactualfuck?”Kieran
muttered,hisswordloweringaninch.“TheHandmaiden?TheRevenant?
Thereallyweird,possiblyinsane—”
“Careful.”Malik’sheadcutsharply
towardKieranasangerpulsedthroughhim.“RememberwhenIsaidyoushouldn’t
getinvolvedwithElashya?Thatdoingsowouldendonlyinheartache?”
“Yeah,Iremember.”Kieran’s
skinseemedtothin.“Itoldyouifyoubroughtthatupagain,I’dripyour
fuckingthroatout.”
“Exactly.”Malik’ssmilewas
loose,buttheacidicburnIfeltpromisedviolence.“Istillloveyoulikea
brother.Youprobablydon’tbelievethat,butmakenomistake,ifyousayone
morenegativethingaboutMillicent,I’llripyourfuckingthroatout.”
Mybrowsrose.
“Thisisallheartwarmingand
shit,”Reaverhissed,“butweseriouslydonothavetimeforthis.”
“Youstayedbecauseofher,”I
said.
Malikshuddered.“I’vedonemany
unimaginablethingsforher.Thingsshewillneverhaveanyknowledge
of.”
Makingupmymind,Istepped
forward.“Ibelieveyou.Thatdoesn’tmeanItrustyou.ShowuswhereCasteel
is.Butifyoubetrayus,Iwillkillyoumyself.”
Chapter30
Malikhadleduspasttherowofdoorsandfartherinto
thedepthsoftheTemple.Theentrypointwasadoorweneverwould’vethought
toopen—onethatledtoapantrythathidafalsewall.
Theentrancetotheunderground
chamberwasnarrowandappearedasoldastheTemple,thestepscrumblingunder
ourweight.Itdumpedintoahallthatfedintonumerouspathways,andwe
didn’twalkmorethantenfeetbeforetakingaleftoraright.
Ihadnoideahowanyonecould
rememberthispath,butIknewonethingforsure—thespellmayhaveworked
downhere,butweneverwould’vefoundourwaybackoutwithoutblowingthrough
theceilingandintothegodsonlyknewwhat.Becausetherewasnowaywewere
stillundertheTemple
WeallkeptoureyesonMalik.
Kieran’sdistrustofhisformerbrethrenwasasstrongashisreluctantneedto
believethatMalikhadn’tforsakenhisfamilyandhiskingdomfortheBlood
Crown.Hewasfightingit.Icouldtasteandseethateverytimemyattention
shiftedbacktothePrincefromwhereverhewasleadingus.Therewasangerin
thesetofhisjaw.Hopeinhowhischestrosesharply.Disappointmentinthe
narrowingofhiseyes.Uncertaintyintheglanceshesentme,onesthat
mirroredmine.Hadwemadeamistake?Ifwehadn’t,didthereasonMalikremained
withtheBloodCrownjustifyanyandallofthethingshe’ddone?
“Whydidn’tyouhelpCasteel
escape?”Iasked.“Youcould’veatanypoint.”
“You’veseenwhatkindofshape
he’sin.Hewouldn’thavemadeitfar,”Malikansweredthroughclenchedteeth.“His
disappearancewould’vebeennoticedquickly,too.Theywould’vecaughthim,and
thatwouldn’thaveendedwellforCas.”
“Youcould’vegottenhimoutof
thecityandtous,”Kieranchallenged.
“Iwon’tleaveherhere,”Malik
saidwithouthesitation.“NotevenforCas.”
Kieran’sconflictgrew,butmine
lessened.BecauseIcouldunderstandthat.I’dchosentosaveCasteelovermy
fatherbeforeIevenleftforCarsodonia.
“Howmuchlonger?”Reaver
demanded.
“Notverymuch,”Malikassured.
“Butweneedtohurry.IranintoCallumminutesbeforethehornsblared,and
hehightailedhisasstoIsbeth.Wegotintoit,”hesaid,andInoticedhis
knucklesthen.Theywerered,theskinangryandrippedbutalreadyhealing.
He’ddefinitelybeeninafight.“Callumwas…”
“Hewaswhat?”Iasked.
Malikglancedatme.“Hewas
justsayingsomeshitaboutCas.He’salwayssayingshit.Still,Igotabad
feeling.IwasgoingtocheckonCasmyselfwhenthemisthitthecity,andI
sawyouall.”
“Doyouthinkhedidsomething?”
Acoldwindofworrysweptthroughme.
“Anythingispossiblewiththat
fucker.”
Dreadbuilt.Everythinglooked
thesameastenstepsback.Ibegantofearthatwe’dbeenplayed,andIwould
havetokillMalikinthisundergroundmaze.
Weroundedacorner,andthe
scentofmustydecayreachedus.Damp,torch-litwallscameintoview,aswell
asalong,straighthallwithjustonecelltotheleft.Adeep,awfulgrowl
rumbledfromwithin.
Afrayedsortofsoundleftme.
Ipickedupmypaceandthenbrokeintoarun,passingMalik.
“Poppy,”KieranshoutedasI
rushedthroughtheopening—
Jerkingback,Ichokedona
screamasthecreaturechainedtothewalllungedforward,itsarms
outstretched.Shockseizedme.Myfeetslippedoutfromunderme,andIwent
downhardonmyass,notevenfeelingtheimpactofthefall.
Ibarelyrecognizedhim
Hisskinwasghastlypale,
almostlikeaCraven’s.Thestrikinglinesandplanesofhisfacewerecontorted,
lipspeeledback,andfangsthickerandlongerthanI’deverseen.Hiseyes…
Goodgods,theywerepitch-black—notahintofambervisible.Andhischest…
Ajaggedholemangledthecenter
ofhistorso,justbelowhisheart.Bloodcoveredhisstomach.Thefloor.I
realizeditwaswhathadcausedmetoslip.
“Oh,gods,”Igasped,myheart
crackingopen.
Casteelsnappedattheair,the
chainsgroaningashepulledthemtaut.Theshadowstonebandcutintohisthroat,
butitdidn’tstophimfromswipingatmeandsnarling.
“No.”Kierangraspedmy
shoulders,haulingmeclearashisagonypummeledmysenses.Hestaredatthe
manwhowasmorethanjustafriendtohim.“No.”
Mysensesopened,reachingout
toCasteelasKieranliftedmetomyfeet.Icameintocontactwithnowall.No
angerorpain.Notevenahintofanguish.Therewasnothingbutayawning,
crimsonvoidofinsidious,unendinghunger.
NosignofCasteelremainedin
thethick,redhazeofbloodlust.
“Hewasn’tlikethisyesterday.”
Ishuddered.“Thatwound—”
“Callum,”Maliksnarled,
enteringthecell.HestuckclosetothewallasCasteelwhippedtotheside,
trackinghisbrother’smovements.Hisbloodiedchestvibratedwithsound.“He
didthis.”
Furyexploded,stirringupthe
Primalessence.“Iwanthimdead.”
“Noted,”Reaversaidfromthe
entrance.
“Weneedtogethimcalm.”Istartedtomovecloser.“Thenwe—”
Kieran’sarmcamearoundmy
waist,pullingmetighttohischest.“Thereisnowayyou’regettingcloseto
him.”
Casteel’sattentionsnappedin
ourdirection.Hisheadtiltedashesnarled.
“He’s…he’stoofargone,”Kieran
said,hisvoicehoarse.
Myheartstutteredtoapainful
stop.“No.He’snot.Hecan’tbe.”Irubbedthebloodoffmypalm.Thegolden
swirlwasdiminthefadingcandlelight.“He’sstillalive.”
“Buthe’sinbloodlust,Poppy.”
Kieran’svoicewasloadedwithbrokenshardsofpain.“Hedoesn’trecognize
you.”
Casteelsnappedforwardagain.The
chainjerkedhimbacksharply.Icriedoutashestaggeredandwentdownonone
knee
“ThatisnotCas,”Kieran
whispered,shaking.
Thosefourwordsthreatenedto
destroyme.“Butwecangethimback.Hejustneedstofeed.I’llbefine.He
can’tkillme.”IpulledatKieran’sarm.Whenhedidn’tletgo,Itwisted
towardhim,ourfacesinchesapart.“Kieran—”
“Iknow.”Kieranclaspedtheback
ofmyneck,pullingmyforeheadtohis.“Heneedstofeed,buthedoesn’t
recognizeyou,Poppy,”herepeated.“Hewillhurtyou.Ican’tstand
hereandallowthat.Idon’twanttoseethathappentoyou.Idon’twantto
seehowitwillfuckingdestroyhimwhenhecomesoutofthebloodlustand
realizeswhathe’sdone.”
Anothershudderhitme.“ButI
needtohelphim—”
“Whatmybrotherneedsisto
feedandhavethetimeforthattopullhimoutofbloodlust.Hemayneed
multiplefeedings.Somethingwedon’thavethetimeforhere,”Maliksaid,
shovingshorterstrandsofhairbackfromhisface.“Weneedtogethimoutof
here.Someplacesafewherewehavetime.”Amusclethrobbedinhistempleashe
staredathisbrother.“Iknowofaplace.Ifwecangethimthere,we’llbe
goodforatleastadayortwo.”
“Areyouserious?”Kieranexploded
asCasteel’sheadwhippedaround.“Youexpectustotrustyou?”
Malik’slipsthinned.“Youdon’t
havemuchchoice,doyou?”
“Literallywalkingoutofhere
andintothearmsofthatbitchQueenisabetterchoice,”Kieranspat.
“Comeon,man.Youknowwecan’t
feedhimhere.Youknowheneedstime.”Malik’seyeswereasbrightascitrine
jewelsashefacedoffwithKieran.“Ifwetrytodothathere,we’regoingto
getcaught,andallofus—yes,allofus—aregoingtowishwewere
dead.”
Thatcouldn’thappen.“Howdowe
gethimoutofhere?”
“Youreallywanttoriskthis?”
Kierandemanded.“Withhim?”
“Howlongdoesittaketorecover
frombloodlust?”Iaskedinsteadofanswering.“Howlongbeforethepersoncan
becomeenoughofthemselvesagain?”
Kieransuckedinair,butno
wordscameout.Lookingaway,hedraggedhishandoverhisface.
“Wedon’thaveachoice,”I
said,softeningmyvoice.“Malikknowsthat.Iknowthat.Youdo,too.So,how
dowegethimoutofhere?”
Kieran’shandfelltohisside.
“We’llhavetoknockhimout.”
Mythroatdried.“Wehaveto
hurthim?”
“It’stheonlyway.”Kieran
shookhishead.“Andthenhopehestaysunconsciouslongenough.”
Hearthurting,Iturnedbackto
Casteel.Hethrashed,reachingforme.Isawnothingofhiminhisface.His
eyes.“I…Idon’tknowifIcandoitwithouthurtinghimmore.I’veneverused
theessenceforsomethinglikethat,andI—”
“Icandoit,”Maliksaid.
“Kieran,I’mgoingtoneedyoutodistracthimlongenoughformetogetbehind
him.”
Kierangaveasharpnodandthen
madehismove,steppingaroundme.Asecondlater,Malikrushedunderthe
chain.Casteelwhippedaround,butMalikwasalreadybehindhim.Hefoldedan
armaroundCasteel’sthroat,clampingdownonhiswindpipewithwhatIknewwas
likelyonesqueezeawayfromcrushingthatcartilage.
Casteelthrewhimselfback,
knockingMalikintothewall,butMalikheldon,squeezingandsqueezingas
Casteelclawedathisarms,attheair—
Iwantedtolookaway.Iwanted
toclosemyeyesandscream,butIforcedmyselftoseethis.Towatchuntil
Casteel’smovementbecamesluggishandblurredandhefinallywentlimpin
Malik’sarms.
Ittookminutes.
MinutesIknewwouldhauntme.
“Gods,”Malikgrunted,gently
layingCasteeldown.Helookedoverhisshoulderatthewall.“Thechains?They’re
inthereprettywell.”
“Reaver?”Irasped.“Canyou
breakthem?”
Thedrakenstrodeforward,
kneelingnearthewall.Helookedoveratus.“Iwouldsuggestleavingthe
chainsonhimuntilweknowhe’scalm.”
“No.”Isteppedforward.“Iwant
thechainsoff.”
“Iwantthemoff,too,”Kieran
said.“Butwe’llprobablyneedthemwhenhewakesup.”
“Yeah,”Malikagreed.“Thelast
thingweneedisforhimtogetawayfromus.”
Ihatedthis.Hatedallofit.
“Canwegettheshacklesoffhisanklesandneck,atleast?”
Maliknodded,lookingdownat
hisbrother.“Wecandothat,”hesaid,hisvoicethick.
Reaverleaneddown,hismouth
openingasKieranturnedmeaway.
“Goodgods,”IheardMalikrasp
assilveryflameslitthedarkwalls.“You’reafuckingdraken.”Therewasa
beatofsilence.“That’swhythoseknightsweresmoldering.”
Kieran’sgazemetmineasI
heardaheavychainfall,clangingoffthestone.Silently,heliftedhishands
tomycheeks.Anotherchainhitthefloor.Iflinched.Kieranswepthisthumbs
acrossmycheeks,wipingawaytears.Athirdchainclattered,andKieran’seyes
wentbeyondme.Afewmomentslater,henoddedandletgo.Iturnedtosee
Reavercarefullyplacingthebonechainsstillattachedtotheshackleson
Casteel’swristsonhistoo-stillchest.
Ilookeddownatmypalm.The
goldenimprintshimmeredfaintlyintheshadowycell.He’salive.I
kepttellingmyselfthat.He’salive
KieranwenttoCasteel’sside.
“I’llcarryhim.”
“No,”Malikbitout.“He’smy
brother.Andifyouwanthim,you’regoingtohavetopryhimfrommydead
fingers.I’mcarryinghim.”
Kieranlookedasifhewishedto
dojustthat,butherelented.“Thenwherearewegoing?”
Malikstrodeforward.“Toafriend’s.”
Ifollowedhimoutofthecell,
stoppinglongenoughtoplacemyhandonthestone.Theessenceroaredthroughme
asIbroughttheceilingofthecelldown.
Noonewouldeverbekeptthere
again.
WefollowedMalikthroughawindingmazeofhallsand
tunnelsuntilheturnedintoanarrow,crampedpassagewaythatsmelledofdamp
soilandsewage.Iknewwewereneargroundlevel.
Theopeningaheadlookedtobe
whatremainedofabrickwall.Ithadhalfcollapsed,leavinganopeningwide
enoughtosqueezethrough.IfollowedclosebehindMalik,myattentionnever
strayingfarfromCasteel.Hehadn’tstirredonceunderKieran’scloak,which
hadbeendrapedoverhim,hidinghisbodyandthechains
Therewasnotimetostopand
healCasteel’swound,somethingthatcutatmewitheachstepwetook.Butthat
kindofwoundwouldn’tonlytakeafewsecondstoclose,andwerantheriskof
wakinghimduringtheprocess.
“Whatwereyouallplanningto
dowhenyoufoundCas?”MalikaskedasIwiggledthroughtheopening,therough
edgesofthebrickssnaggingmycloak.“Fightyourwayoutthemaingates?”
SilencegreetedhimasI
straightened,lookingaround.Themistwasstillheavyherebutnotnearlyas
thick.
“That’sexactlywhatyouall
weregoingtodo.”Malikcursedunderhisbreath.“Doyouthinkyoureally
would’vemadeitout?EveniftheCravenhadn’tjoinedinthefun?”
“Whatdoyouthink?”Kieran
joinedusoutside,followedbyReaver.
“WhatIthinkisthatyouall
would’vebeencaughtdownthere.AndevenifCasweren’tintheshapehewas,
Isbethwould’vedoneexactlyasshethreatenedtodooncesherealizedthatyou
weremissing.”
“Shethreatenedtoputchildren
onthewallsandthegatesoftheRise,”Ianswered,feelingKieran’sgazeon
measIturnedaround,lookingup.Above,themistmutedtheglowofthe
streetlamps,butIcouldseeenoughtorealizewherewewere.“TheGolden
Bridge.”
“Yes.”Malikstartedupthe
slopeoftheembankment,hishoodedfigurenearlydisappearingintothemist.The
groundwasmuddyandfullofaslopIdidn’twanttothinkabout.“Thetunnel
entrancecavedinthereafewyearsago.TheCravenhavebeengettingoutfrom
there,butnoone’sfixedit.”
“Out?”Kieranquestionedas
severalroundsoffieryarrowslituptheskybeyondtheRise.Itoremygaze
fromthere.
“Whatdoyouthinkhappensto
themortalsthevamprysgetabitgluttonouswith?Can’tletthemturnintheir
homes,”Maliksaidasweclearedtheembankmentandcontinuedonthroughthe
thick,still-swirlingmist.“They’redumpedundergroundwheretheyturn.
Sometimes,theygetout,youknow,whenthegodsareangry.Ofcourse,a
sizabletithetotheTempleshelpsassuagethatangerenoughfortheCravento
bedealtwith.”
MyeyesnarrowedonMalik’sback.
“Andyou’reokaywiththat?Innocentpeoplebeingturnedintomonsters?Money
beingtakenfrompeoplewhocan’taffordit?”
“NeversaidIwasokaywithany
ofit,”Malikreplied.
“Butyou’rehere.”Reaverscanned
themistandtheemptystreet.“Acceptingitallforafemale?”
“NeversaidIacceptediteither.”
Nothingwassaidafterthatfor
alongtime,butKieranseemedtowatchMalikevencloser.WewalkedwhatI
knewwastheveryoutskirtsofthecrampeddistrictofCroft’sCross,even
thoughIcouldn’tseeanyofthebuildingsstackedontopofoneanotherin
staggering,clusteredrows.Itwasthesmelloftheseaandthescentoftoo
manypeopleforcedtoliveinatoo-smallplacethattippedmeoff.
Themistwasfadingoverthe
edgesofthedistrictnearthesea.Isawmoreofthemoonlight-kissedwaters,
butorderswerestillbeingshoutedfromtheRise,arrowsstillbeinglobbed.
Nohornhadblownagain,alertingthecitizensthatitwassafe.
Themistwasdamperhere,closer
totheocean,andafinesheenofsweatdottedmybrowbeneaththehood.Theslender
streetsofwhatseemedtobeshopsandhomesappearedemptyandsilentthrough
themist.Notevenourfootstepscouldbeheardaswecutbetweentwoone-story
buildingsandbeganclimbingthesteeppath—anearthenpassthroughbirch
trees.
“Whoisthisfriend?”Kieranbroke
thesilence.“Andwhereinthehellarewewalking?Atlantia?”
“Stonehill,”IansweredasMalik
snorted.“Aren’twe?”
“Weare.”
Stonehillwasadistrict
somewherebetweenCroft’sCrossandtheStroudSea,wherethosewhohadalittle
coinbutnotalotcalledhome.Usually,therewasonefamilyperhomeand
littlespacebetweenthenormallyone-storyhouseswithterracottaroofsused
forpatios.
“Andthisfriend?”Kieranpersisted
aswefoundourwayontoanotherunevensidewalk.
“Someonewhocanbetrusted,”Malik
answeredaswecameuponastuccohomewithnocourtyardandadoorleading
rightontothesidewalk.Iwasabletoseethatitwasdarkbeyondthetwo
latticedwindowsoneithersideofthedoor.“HisnameisBlaz.Wife’snameis
Clariza.”
“Andhowdoyouknowthem?”I
askedashehitthebottomofthedoorwithhisbootedfoot.“Whyshouldwetrust
them?”
“ImetClarizaonenightin
LowerTownwhensheandherfriendsweresmugglingbarrelsfromashipthat’d
comeinfromtheVodinaIsles.Barrelsthatsmelledsuspiciouslyofblackpowder,”
heanswered,kickingthedooragainandstirringupthemist.“Youshouldtrust
thembecausethosebarrelsdid,infact,carryblackpowderthattheyplanto
usetoblowuptheinnerwallsofWayfair.”
Reaverslowlylookedathim.
“Whatthefuck?”
Descenters.Theyhadtobe
Descenters.ButhowwasMalikinvolved?
“Andyoushouldalsoknow,”
Malikcontinued,“thattheydonotbelieveyoutobeaHarbingerofdoom.”
Well,thatwasgood.“Andyou?
Doyoubelievethat?”
Maliksaidnothing.
Thedoorcrackedopenjustthen,
revealingasliverofatancheekandonebrowneye.Thateyeliftedtothe
shadowyrecessesofMalik’shood,droppedtothecloakedbodyinhisarms,and
thendartedtowherewestood.Theeyenarrowed.“DoIevenwanttoknow?”
“Probablynotatfirst,”Malik
respondedinavoicebarelyaboveawhisper.“But,yeah,youwillonceyouknow
whoIhaveinmyarmsandwhostandswithme.”
WarinessradiatedfromKieran,
tastingofvinegarashecrowdedMalik’sback.
“Who’sinyourarms?”themanI
couldonlyassumewasBlazdemandedinanequallylowvoice.
Ididn’tthinkMalikwould
answer.
Hedid.
“TheKingofAtlantia.”
MymouthdroppedopenasBlaz
uttered,“Bullshit.”
“AndIhavehiswifewithme,”
Malikcontinued.IthoughtforamomentthatReavermightactuallyeathim.
“Youknow,theQueen.”
“Doublebullshit,”Blazreplied.
Sighing,Maliklookedoverhis
shouldertowhereIstood.“Showhim.”
“Yeah.”Theeyenarrowedeven
further.“Showmeandthentellmewhatmygoodmanherewassmokingthatgot
himshowingupatmydooronanightlikethis,tellingwildstories.”
Thefactthatthemanhadn’t
shoutedtotheskyatthementionofAtlantiawassomewhatreassuring.
Decidingthatwewerealready
knee-deepinwhateverthiswas,IedgedpastKieranandcametostandbeside
Malik.Iloweredthehoodofmycloak.
Thateyesweptovermyfaceand
thendartedbacktothescaronmybrow,goingwide.“Holyshit,”hegaspedas
Kieranreachedover,tuggingmyhoodbackintoplace.“It’syou.It’sreally
you.Holyshit.”
“Aremyscarsthatwellknown?”
Iasked.
“Scars?”Blazmumbledasthe
doorsweptopenwide.“Holyshitonasardinesandwich.Yeah,comerightin.”
“Iamslightlyconcernedabout
thismortal,”Reavermuttered.
Iwasmorethanslightly
concernedaboutallofthis,butwhenMalikwalkedin,Ifollowedwithout
hesitationsincehecarriedCasteel.Kieranwasrightbehindme,enteringa
smallfoyer.Thespacehadnolight,soallIcouldmakeoutwastheshapeof
whatappearedtobelow-to-the-floorchairs.
“It’snotthescars,”Kieran
said,hisvoicelowasBlazclosedthedoorbehindReaver.“It’syoureyes.They’re
streakedwithsilver.BeenthatwaysinceyouenteredthestairwellinWayfair.”
Iblinkedrapidly,eventhoughI
hadnoideaifthatwouldhelporifitdid.Maybetheadrenalinewascausing
it?
“Blaz?”cameasoftvoicefrom
thenarrowhall,litonlybyawallsconce.“What’sgoingon?”
“Youshouldcomeinhere.”Blaz
backedupslowlyintothehall.Theman’shairmatchedhisname.Fierystrands
brushedtheskinathistemplesthatsurelyburneduponafewmomentsinthe
sun.Abeardinadeeperredcolorcoveredhisjaw.“We’vegotguests.Elianand
specialguests.”
“Elian?”Irepeatedundermy
breath,thinkingIrecognizedthename.
“That’shismiddlename.”Kieran
noddedatMalik’sback.“Namedaftertheirancestor.”
ElianDa’Neer.Theone
who’dsummonedthegodsafterthewarwiththedeitiestosmoothoverrelations
withthewolven.TheveryfirstbondingbetweenwolvenandAtlantianresulted
fromthemeeting.WasthatwhyTawnyhadn’tknownMalikwhenshe’dbeenat
Wayfair?Becauseshe’dknownhimasElian?
Amomentlater,ashortfigurestepped
outfromoneofthechambersoffthehallandintothelamplight.Shoulder-length
darkhairframedcool,olive-beigecheeksandaroundedchin.Thewoman
appearedtobeaboutthesameageasBlaz,somewhereintheirthirddecadeof
life.Sheworeadarksleepingrobe,beltedaroundthewaist.
Herhandsweren’tempty.
Clarizaheldaslenderiron
daggerasshecreptforward.“Whatkindofspecialguestsdidyoubringus,
Elian?”sheasked,dark,intelligenteyesdartingoverthegroupandlingering
onReaver,whosefacewastheonlyonevisible.Hispupilswerenormal,butthe
mortalstillswallowed.
“TheKingofAtlantia,”Blaz
answered,joininghiswife.“AndtheQueen.”
“Bullshit.”Clarizaechoedher
husband’searlysentiment.“HaveyoubeenindulgingintheRedRuin?”
Casteelwaslikelytoawakenat
anymoment.Isteppedforwardtoavoidanylengthyattemptstoproveour
identitieswhenIcouldjustshowthem.Iliftedthehood,lettingitdrape
frommyshoulders
Clariza’seyeswentwide.“Holy
shit.”
“Whatheclaimsistrue.Myname
isPenellaphe.Youcould’veknownofmeastheMaidenatonetime.Hedoeshold
myhusbandinhisarms.He’sbeenheldbytheBloodCrown,”Itoldthem,noting
thetighteninginClariza’sjaw.“He’sbeeninjuredandisinneedofshelterso
Icanprovidehimwithaid.Wewerebroughtherebecauseweweretoldthatwe
couldtrustyou.”
Withouttakinghereyesoffme,
Clarizaloweredherselftooneknee.Sheplacedonehandoverherheartandthe
other,whichheldthedagger,shepressedtothefloor.Herhusbandfollowedsuit.
“Frombloodandash,”shesaid,
bowingherhead.
“Wewillrise,”Blazfinished.
Ishuddered.Thosewordsechoed
throughme,themeaningsoverydifferentfromwhenI’dfirstheardthem.
“That’snotnecessary.I’mnotyour
Queen,”Isaid,glancingatCasteel’sshroudedform.“We’rejustinneedof
space.AprivateplacewhereIcanhelpmyhusband.”
Malik’sheadcutsharplyinmy
directionbuthesaidnothing.
“YoumaynotbeourQueennow,”
Clarizasaid,herheadlifting,“butyouareagod.”
“Iam.”Iswallowedthickly,
worrypressingdownonme.“Butyoustilldonotneedtobowbeforeme.”
“NotwhatIexpectedtohearfrom
anactualgod,”Blazmumbled.“ButI’mnotgoingtocomplain.”Hereachedover,
takinghiswife’shandsotheyrosetogether.“Whateveryouneed.”
“Achamber?”Maliksuggested.
“Withasturdydoor.”Hepaused.“Andwalls.Justincase.”
Clarizafrowned.
“Wehaveabedchamberthat
Riza’smotheronceused.”Blazpivotedandstartedwalking.“Notsureabouthow
sturdythewallsordoorare,butthey’restanding.”
Wefollowed,passingwhat
appearedtobeanentrywaytoasittingchamberandthenanothercloseddoor.
Blazopenedtheroundeddoortotheleftontheoppositesideofthehall.
“He’sbeenstarved,hasn’the?”
Clarizaaskedasherhusbandhurriedintothechamber,lightingagaslampona
smallendtable.
MygazesnappedtoherasMalik
carriedCasteeltothenarrowbed.Thechainsclangedtogetherashelaidhim
down,drawingBlaz’sattention.
“Mygreat-great-grandmotherwasAtlantian,”
Clarizaexplained.“Mygrandmotherusedtotellmewhathappenedwhenhermother
couldn’teasilyfindanotherAtlantiantofeedfrom.FromwhatIremember,it
didn’tsoundlikemanywallsordoorsarestrongenough.”
Ihadalotofquestionsabout
whyherfamilyhadchosentoremainandnotheadforAtlantia,butthose
questionswouldhavetowaitasIwenttotheothersideofthebed.Malik
pulledthecloakoff.
“Fuckinggods.”Blaz’sgasp
turnedintoawheeze.“Sorry.Thatwasprobablyoffensive.Iamdeeply
regretful.”
“It’sokay.”Myheartachedanew
asItookinCasteel’stoo-paleskinandthegrislywound.
“Shit,”Malikcursed,andmy
gazeflewtoCasteel’sface.Thedarkslashofbrowshadfurrowed.Isawtension
creepingintothestarklinesofhisfeatures.
“Youshouldallleave,”Kieran
advised,comingforwardasMaliktookholdofthechains.Heliftedthemfrom
Casteel’schest.“He’sabouttowake.”
Chapter31
Clarizagraspedherhusband’sarmandhadalreadybegun
backingtowardthedoor.“I’llgetsomefoodreadyandheatupsomefresh
water.He’llneedboth.”
“Thankyou.”Iforcedasmile,
flickingaglanceatReaver.
Thedrakensensedmywill.He
turnedtothemortals.“I’llhelp.”
Inotherwords,hewouldkeepan
eyeonthem.TheymaybeDescentersandcurrentlyplanningtolaunchsomesort
ofattackonWayfair,butthatdidn’tmeanItrustedthemwithCasteel’slife.
“Sure.Youcantelluswhere
you’refromwhilehelping,”IheardClarizasayasshesteppedintothehall.
“Likeexactlyhowfareastyoucomefrom.”
Thatwould’venormallybeenan
oddthingtosay,exceptforthefactthatReaverhailedfromthefarthest-east
placeonecouldget.
“You’vegotalotofthingsyou
needtobesharingafteryou’redoneinhere.”BlazpointedatMalikashe
pausedatthedoorway.“Alotofthings.”
Thedoorclosedonthat.I
lookedoveratMalik.“Dotheyknowwhoyouare?”
“No,”hesaid.“Theydon’t.”
Casteel’seyesopenedthen,the
irisespitch-black.Iwasn’tpreparedtoseethatagain.Myheartsplintered
evenmore,buttherewasnotimetodwellonit
Hecameoffthebed,lashingout
likeacorneredpitviper.Ijumpedback,hittingthewall.Hisfingersgrazed
thefrontofmyshirtasMalikcurledthechainsaroundhisforearm,gruntingas
hehauledCasteelback.Cursing,Maliktriedtogethisbrotherbackontothe
bed,butCasteelwasincrediblystronginthisstate.
“Malikcanfeedhim,”Kieranbit
outasCasteelletoutalowhowl.“I’lltakethechains.”
“No.”Ipushedoffthewall.Kieran’s
gazeshottome.“Ihaveawholelotmoreeatherinme.Wouldn’tmybloodbring
himoutofbloodlustmuchfaster?”
Kierandidn’tanswer.
Malikdid.“It’sunlikelythat
mybloodwilldomuchforhimatthispoint,”hesaid,hisjawclenchingashedug
inhisheels.“Webothknowthat.She’sagod.Herbloodisthebestchoice.”
Kieran’sworryfilledmythroatlike
too-thickcream—hisconcernformeandforCasteel.“Icanhealhimfirst.I
justneedtotouchhim.Thatshouldcalmhim.”
Malik’seyebrowsroseindoubt
asCasteelturnedonhim,forcingMaliktojumpontothebedandmovetothe
otherside
“Ijustneedoneofyouto
distracthim.”IclaspedKieran’scheeks.“I’llcalmhimfirst.Okay?Iwon’t
lethimhurtme.Noneofuswill.”
Amusclethrummedagainstmy
palmasKieran’seyesglowedaluminousblue.“Fuck.Ihatethis.”
“Me,too.”Stretchingup,I
pressedmylipsagainsthisforehead.
Afinetremorranthroughhim,and
thenhereleasedme.“Please…”
Kierandidn’tfinish.Hedidn’t
needtoasIfacedCasteel.Hewasonlyafewfeetfrommenow,snarlingandsnapping.
“I’llgetbehindhimthistime.”
KieranlookedatMalik.“Ineedyoutogethimclosetoyou.”
Maliknodded.
Kierantookadeepbreath.“Once
Igetagoodholdonhim,you’vegottodoyourthing.Understood?”
Casteelhowled,thesoundsoeerily
similartothatofaCraventhatmyinsidesturnedcold.
ButIwasn’tafraid.
IwasneverscaredofCasteel.
Noteveninthisstate.
“Ready?”Kieransaid.
“Yes.”
Malikyankedthechainstoward
him,attemptingtowrapthemaroundoneofthebedposts.Casteeltwistedtoward
hisbrother,takinghiseyesoffKieran.ThewolvendartedbehindCasteel,
clampingonearmaroundCasteel’schest,pinninghisarmstohissideashemanaged
togethishandunderCasteel’sjaw.
Casteelwentwild,
thrashing,growling,andspitting.Hethrewhisweightback,slammingKieran
intothewall.Plastercracked.Thechainslippedawayfromthebedpost.
“Now,”Kierangrunted.
Tappingintotheeather,Ibegan
toconjureuphappythoughts—memoriesofhimandmeunderthewillowtreein
Masadonia.Memoriesofhimplayingwithmyhairandteachingmehowtocontrol
ahorse.Allofthoseandmorefilledmythoughtsasmyhandclosedaroundhis
skin—hiscold,coldskin.Silvery-whitelightsparkedfrommyfingertips.
“Don’tdothis,”Kieranrasped
asCasteelbuckedagainsthim,strainingtowardme.ThesheerintensityofCasteel’s
bloodlustpulledKieranawayfromthewall.“Comeon,man.”
CasteelbrokeKieran’sholdaround
hisneck.
“Shit,”Kierangroaned,hisboots
skiddingacrossthewoodfloor.
Malikwasthere,havingdroppedthe
chainstograbhisbrotherbythechin.“Igothim.”
“Please,Cas,”Kieran
said—beggedreally.“You’vegottoletherhelpyoufindcalm.”
Casteel’sansweringgrowlraised
thehairsallovermybodyaswarmthrushedfromme.Iknewthemomentthe
healingenergyhithimbecauseCasteelwentrigid.Theshimmeringwebswept
overhim,fillingthechamberforthebriefestsecondbeforefadingintohisskin.
TheraggedwoundinhischestwasawashwitheatherasCasteelstaggeredback,
fallingintoKieran.Theybothwentdowntothefloor,andMalikandI
followed.
“Gods,”Malikutteredashe
staredathisbrother’srapidlyhealingchest.Theglowhadfaded,revealinga
brightpinkpatchofnewlyformedskin.HiseyesshottoCasteel’sface.“Cas?”
Hislidswerelowered,lips
partedashepantedforbreath.HetrembledsobadlyheshookKieran.
Islidmyhanduphisarm.His
skinwasstillfartoocold.“Casteel?”Iwhispered.
Hiseyesopenedwide,andathin
stripofgoldwasvisibleastheylockedwithmine.Hewasthere—apieceofhim
recovered,atleast.
Iliftedmywristtohismouth.
“Youneedtofeed.”
“I…Ican’t,”Casteelforcedout,
wordsgutturalashetwistedhisheadtotheside.
“Youhaveto.”Icuppedhischeek
withmyotherhand.
“I’m…I’mbarelyhere…right
now.”Hisgazeflewbacktomine,andIsawitthen,theredglintinthe
darknessthere.“Youneedtogetawayfromme.”
“Cas—”
“Getawayfromme.”Thered
glintbrightened.
“Youfuckingidiot,”hisbrother
growled,griptighteningonCasteel’schin.“Wedon’thavetimeforyoutobe
allheroicandworryabouttakingtoomuchbloodfromagodsdamngod.”
Casteel’sheadjerkedback,cracking
intothesideofKieran’s.Tendonsstoodoutstarklyinhisthroatashislips
peeledbackoverhisfangs.“Getherawayfromme!”
Theforceofhiswordsknocked
meback.
Maliktwistedtowardme.“He’s
notgoingtodoitwithoutsomerealstrongmotivation.Like,forexample,the
scentofyourblood.”
“No,”Casteelroared,hisfeet
kickingagainstthefloorashepushedhimselfandKieranback.Maliklosthis
griponhisbrother’schin.
“Doit.”ThemusclesofKieran’s
armsbulgedashefoughttoholdCasteelinplace.“Doitbeforetheentire
neighborhoodhearshim.”
Imovedquickly,unsheathingmy
wolvendagger.IpressedmylipstogethertosilencethehissofpainasIdragged
theedgeofthebladeacrossmywrist.
Themomentthescentofmyblood
hittheair,Casteel’sheadswungaround.Nolongerfightingtopullaway,his
entirebeingappearedfixatedonthebloodwellinguponmyskin
“Feed,”Ibegged.“Please.”
Andthenhisheadsnappeddown.
Hisfangsgrazedmyskinashis
mouthclosedoverthewound.Icould’veshoutedwithjoyasIfelthismouth
pullingatmyskin.Hedrankdeeply.
“That’sit,”Kieransaid,his
voicelowashesmoothedlimpstrandsofhairbackfromCasteel’sface.“That’s
good.”
Iscuttledcloser,mylegtangling
withhisasIcarefullytouchedhischeek.Mysensesbrushedagainstthe
whirling,crimson-tainteddarknessthatseemedtofilleverypartofhim.I
searchedthestarkhungerthere,findingwispsoftangyanguishasIsmoothed
myfingersovertheroughbristleonhischeeks.Itastedthepain—icyand
bone-deepasIkepttouchinghischeek.Hisjaw.Thekindofmentalhurtthat
cutsomuchdeeperthananyphysicalpain.Iclosedmyeyes,channelingsome
reliefintohimasI’ddonebefore—
Casteelmovedwithoutwarning,
tearinghismouthfrommyarm,fasterthananyofusthoughthimcapableof.
Noneofushadachancetoreact.Thechainsclatteredacrossthefloorashe
cameatme.Grabbingholdofmyhip,hedraggedmeunderhimashisbodycameover
mine.
Kieranshouted.“Cas—”
Thecold,unevensurfaceofthe
woodfloordugintomyback.Myheartgaveastartledlurchashegrippedwhere
thecloakwasclasped.Buttonsflew,pingingoffthefloor.Hisheadstreaked
down.Thefierypainofhisfangspiercingtheskinofmythroatwassharpand
sudden,brieflyrobbingmeofbreath.Ibitdownonmylipashefedhardanddeep,
hismouthmovingfiercelyagainstmythroat.
“Nope.”Kieranloomedoverus,
forcinghisforearmunderCasteel’schin.“That’sanope.”
Aviolentgrowlrumbledthrough
Casteel.Hisrighthandsankintomyhair,jerkingmyheadbackasheworkedan
armunderme.Trappingmyarmsbetweenus,hepulledmeasclosetohimashe
could.
“Iknowyoudon’tlikeit,but
you’regoingtolikeitalotlessifyouhurther,”Kieranwarned,graspinga
fistfulofCasteel’shair.
TheripplingsnarlfromCasteelcame
fromtheverydepthsofhisbeing.Icouldtastethekeeningsenseofrisingdesperation.
Itwassopotent,Ialmostheardhiswords.Notenough,notenough.If
westoppedhimnow…
We’dlosehimagain.
SearchingforKieran’seyes,I
foundthemandforcedasmile.“It’sokay.”
“Bullshit,”Kierangrowled.
“Itis,”Iinsisted.Anditwas.
Thestingofpainwasmoreofaburnnow,butitwasfading.Thiswasn’t
acleanstrikelikethetimesbefore,butitwasnothinglikewhenanAscended
fed.Ididn’tfeelasifIwerebeingrippedapartfromtheinside,andthat
couldonlymeanthatmorethanjustafragmentedpieceofCasteelremained.
Therewereseveralmore.Wejustneededtogivehimtimetopiecethem
together.“Heneedsmore.Icanfeelthat.”
Imanagedtoworkoneofmyarms
free,andCasteelmadeadesperatesortofsoundasthefaint,bittertasteof
fearreachedme.DidhethinkIwasgoingtopushhimaway?Stophim?
Never.
Smoothingmyhandacrosshis
bristlycheek,Ifeltthemusclesinhisjawworkingasheswallowed.I
threadedmyfingersthroughhishair,curlingthemaroundthebackofhishead,
holdinghimthere.
“Idon’tlikethis,”Kieransaid.
“IfCasstopsbeforehegets
enough,it’llbeworse,”Malikwarnedfromsomewhereinthechamber.“Youknowthat.”
Kieranheldmygazeandthen
cursed,hisheadbowing.HeslidhisarmoutfromunderCasteel’sneck,buthedidn’t
gofar.Hecrouchedclose.
Casteeldidn’tlikeanyofthat.
HisbodytwistedawayfromKieran,tuckingmealmostcompletelyunderhimand
againstthesolidwoodatthefootofthebed.
Hismouthdidn’tleavemy
throat,didn’tstopsucking,andIfelteachdraggingpull.Everyswallow.The
staggeringtugsagainstmyskinwerealmosttoointense,causingmybreathto
catchrepeatedly.
Buttheredhazeofclouds
insidehimwasn’tnearlyasthick.Itwasscattering.Theanguishandsenseof
desperationstillwhirledthroughhim,buttherewasmorenow.Hetook
harderpulls,deeper,wringingagaspfrommytightlypressedlips
Kieranshiftedcloser,butCasteel’s
bitenolongerhurt.Itsimplyburnedwithadifferentkindofheat,onethat
waswhollyinappropriategiventhesituation.
Isqueezedmyeyesshut,
focusingonhisemotionsandwhatItastedfromhim.Therewasatangofsorrow,
buttheicypainwasfading.Andunderallofit,beneaththestorm,wassomething
sweetandwarm…
Chocolate.
Berries.
Love
TherumbleCasteelmadewas
softer,rougher.Hismouthslowed,andthedrawsbecamelanguidbutstilldeep.
Thehandinmyhairloosenedenoughthatthetensionwentoutofmyneck,butI
didn’tmove.Thesmoky,spicyflavorfillingmythroatinvadedmyblood.He
madethatsoundagain,thethick,hummingrumble,andmyentirebodyshuddered.
Hetwistedoverme,hisbodyheatingagainstmine.Itriedtoignorethestorm
buildinginsideme,butthoselipsatmythroat,thesteadyanddeeppullofmy
bloodflowingfrommeandintohim,madeithardtofocusonanythingbuthow
hisbodyfeltagainstmine.Anachingpressuresettledinmybreastsandlower,
betweenmythighs,whereIfelthimthickeningandhardening.
“Well,fuck…”IheardKieran
mutteramomentbeforethehot,wetslideofCasteel’stongueagainsttheside
ofmythroatsentatight,pulsingshudderthroughme.
Myeyesflewopen.
“Notsureifthisistheright
timeforanyofthat.”KieranthreadedhisarmaroundCasteel’sshoulders,
pullinghimbackaninch.
Athroatygrowlcamefrom
Casteel,butitwasnothinglikethewild,primitivesoundshe’dmadebefore.
Thiswasfromadifferentkindofhunger.Onethatmybodyrespondedto,answering
withawetrushofheat.Buttherelief…gods,thereliefswirlingthroughme,
wasjustaspowerfulasthearousal.
Iwasabletofreemyotherarm.
Claspinghischeeks,IliftedCasteel’shead.Gold.Brilliant,burnishedgold
eyeslockedontomine.
“Cas,”Iwhispered.
Thosebeautifuleyesglimmered
withdampness.Tears.“MyQueen,”hesaidinavoicethick
andraw.
AshuddertookmeasIgripped
thesidesofhisface,finallyseeingthattherich,golden-bronzehuehad
beguntoreturntohisskin.Iliftedmylipstohis—
Casteelturnedhishead,
pressinghischeektomine.“Ican’tfeelyourmouthonmine.”Hiswordswerea
rawwhisperinmyear.“IfIdo,I’mgoingtofuckyou.I’mgoingtogetso
deepinsideyouthattherewillbenopartofyouIdon’treach.Righthere.
Rightnow.Itdoesn’tmatterwhoisinthischamber.It’salreadytaking
everythinginmenottobeinsideyou.”
Oh.
Oh,goodness.
Someoneclearedtheirthroat.It
could’vebeenhisbrother,and…well,Ididn’treallywanttothinkaboutthat.
Pulsethuddingattherich,
smokyflavorswampingme,Ipartedsuddenlydrylipsasheliftedhishead.
“Okay.So,howareyoufeeling?Otherthanthat?”
Thicklashessweptdown,halfway
shieldinghiseyes.“I’m…here.”Histhroatworkedonaswallow.“Together.”
Ishookagain.Thatwasn’talot
ofwords,butIknewwhathemeant.SodidKieran.Hisreliefwaspotent,
rollingoffhiminrefreshing,earthywaves.
Casteeleasedhisfingersfrom
myhair,draggingthetipsofthemdownmycheek.Somewhereonthefloor,a
chainclattered.Hestilled,hisattentionshootingtothem.“Ineedtheseoff
me.Now.”
MyeyesfoundKieran.“Get
Reaver.”
Malikdidn’thesitate,leaving
thechamber.Slowly,Casteel’sgazeleftthosechains,returningtomine.
“It’sokay,”Itoldhim,
brushingmyfingersthroughhishairoverandover.“We’llgetthemoff.”
Casteelsaidnothing,those
diamond-brighteyesfixedonmine,hisstareintenseandall-consuming.The
hollownessofhisfeatureswasfillingout,butIstillsawstarkshadowsof
needthere.
Reaverskiddedintothechamber,
followedbyMalik.Adoorclickedshut.
“Thechains,”Isaid.“Canyou
breakthemaroundhiswrists?”
“Icandothat.”Reaverstarted
forward.
“Thankthegods,”Kieran
muttered.“ButIwouldtakeit—”
Casteel’sheadtwistedinmy
grasp,hisbodyvibratingashegrowleddeepandlowatReaver.
“Slowly,”Kieranfinished.
Thedrakenturnedhisgazeon
Casteel,theskinofhisfeaturesthinning.Ridgesappearedalonghischeek,
hisneck.“Really?”
“Hey.Hey.”Istruggledtopull
Casteel’sattentionbacktome.“That’sReaver,”Itoldhim,andhisnostrils
flared.“Remember?Itoldyouabouthim.He’safriend.He’salsoadraken.You’re
notgoingtowinthatbattle.”
“Ithinkhewantstogiveitago,”
Malikremarked.
ThewayCasteeltrackedReaver’s
movementstoldmethatMalikwasn’tfaroffthemark.
Reaverkneltbyus.“I’mgoing
toneedyoutoliftonearmatatime,”heinstructed.“AndI’mgoingtoneed
youtodothatwithouttryingtobitemebecauseIbiteback.”
Casteelwassilent,buthe
liftedhishandfrommycheek.HewatchedReaverlowerhishead,eyeinghow
closelythedrakengottome.Hisupperlipbegantocurl.
Iturnedhisheadtome,andthe
chillimmediatelywentoutofhisgoldeneyes.Therewasnothingbutheatwhen
helookedatme.Andhadn’titalwaysbeenlikethat?Fromthefirstmomentin
theRedPearltonow?Ithad.TherewassomuchIwantedtosay.Somanythings.
Butallthatcameoutwas,“I’vemissedyou.”
Aflareofsilvery-whitewashed
overCasteel’sprofile.Hedidn’tevenflinch,buthisjawflexedwhenthe
shadowstoneshacklehitthefloor.“Ineverleftyou.”
“Iknow.”Tearscrowdedmythroat.
“Otherhand,”Reaverordered.
Casteelshiftedhisweightonto
hisleftarm,andhislowerbodysettledmorefullyagainstmine.Therewasno
mistakingthethick,rigidlengthofhim.Flecksofbrightergoldchurnedin
hiseyes.“Areyousafehere?”
“Wearesafehere.”I
keptcombingbackhishairasthatstreamofsilveryfirelitthespacebetween
ourbodiesandthebed.“Fornow.”
Hisgazeloweredtomymouth.
Therewaswantonintentinhisstare,sendingashiverywaveofawareness
throughme.“Poppy,”hewhispered.
Theshadowstoneshackleshitthe
floor,andKieranquicklygrabbedthemasCasteel’sheadloweredtomine.Hisbreath
dancedovermylips.“Ineedallofyoutoleave.Now.”
Footstepsmovedawayfromus,
butKieranhesitated,remainingwherehewasonthefloorbesideus.Twingesof
concernbrokethroughhisrelief.“Cas…”
OnlythendidCasteellookaway
fromme.HeturnedhisheadtowardKieran.Heliftedhisbandagedhand,
claspingthewolvenbehindtheneck.Theyleanedin,pressingtheirforeheadstogether.
Theriseofasugary,sweetemotioncrowdedouttheconcernandevenrelief.
“Thankyou,”Casteelrasped,the
twowordschoked.
“Whatthehellareyouthanking
mefor?”
“Everything.”
Kieranshuddered,andthey
stayedthatwayforalongmomentbeforeKieranshiftedawayfromCasteel.
UnlikewithReaver,Casteelmadenomovetostopthewolvenashereachedfor
me.Kieran’shandbrushedstrandsofhairbackfrommyface,andthenhebent
over,pressinghislipstomybrow.Emotioncloggedmythroat,andIdidn’tknow
ifitbelongedtothem,me,orifitwasacombinationofallofus.
Kieransaidnothingashepulled
away,andthestrangesturgetoreachoutandstophimsweptthroughme.I
didn’tunderstandwherethatwanthadcomefrom.OrifitwasmineorCasteel’s.
AndIdidn’tknowwhyitfeltwrongnottoactonit.
ButthenCasteelandIwere
alone,andthosebeautiful,goldeneyes,sofulloffireandlove,werelocked
ontomine.Itwasjustus,andnothingelse—absolutelynothing—mattered.
Notthepatchesofdrieddirtandbloodthatcoverednearlyeveryinchofhis
skin.NotthemistoutsideortheCravenI’dunintentionallycalledforth.Not
whatcameafterthis—theBloodQueenorthewar.
Nothingbutusandour
loveandneedforeachother.
“Cas,”Iwhispered.
Hebecamesostill,Ididn’t
thinkheevenbreathedashelookeddownatme.Butwhatroaredthroughhimwas
amadnessofmovement.Ifelthiminsideme—hisdesireandneed
churningwithmine.Theacheblossomedanew,throbbingandpulsingandheating
mybloodandskin.
Hisnostrilsflared,andthe
goldofhiseyesburnedevenbrighter.Notasinglepartofmefeltanyshame
overhowacutelyhesensedmyarousal.
“Poppy,”herepeated,
andthenhismouthwasonmine.
Thekiss…
Therewasnothingsoftaboutit.
Wecametogetherinaclashofteethandlipsandraw,overwhelmingemotions.
Hishanddugintomyhipasminefistedhishair.Thekisswasmaddening.
Feral.Possessive.Itwasthekindthatonedrownedin,andI’dneverbeen
happiertodoso.Histonguesweptinsidemymouth,againstmine,andItasted
myblood,richandwarm.Therewassomethingwildaboutthat.Somethinguncharted.
Hismouthmovedovermine,his
fangsnickingmylowerlip.Istartedtocurlmylegsaroundhiswaist,butthe
handatmyhipstilledme.Heliftedhishead,hischestrisingandfalling
raggedly.Abitofbloodglistenedonhislip.
Istretchedmyheadup,catching
thatdropofbloodandhislipbetweenmine.Hegroaned,eyesclosingbriefly.
Whentheyreopened,theyweretwinfiresofmoltengold.
Casteelshiftedontohisknees,
liftinghisbodyfrommine.BeforeIcouldevenguesswhathewasabout,he
grippedmyhiponcemore.Heflippedmeontomybellyandthenhauledmeonto
myknees.
“Ineedtofeelyourskinagainst
mine,”hebitoutinavoicethatwasbarelyrecognizable.
Myloosebraidfellforwardas
onehandwenttothehemofmytunic,shovingtheshirtupovermyhead.He
tuggeditdownsoitpooledatmywrists.
Theroughnessinthewayhe
tuggedthegauzyclothdown,whereitcaughtbeneathmybreasts,sentawicked
thrillthroughmyblood.Hishand,though…Thegentlenessinhowhetrailedhis
palmdownthecenterofmyback,causedmyhearttoswell.
Slidinghishanddownmyassand
thenbetweenmythighs,hecurledhisfingerthere,brushingagainstthat
heatedpartofme.Ishuddered—
Myentirebodyjerkedashetore
throughthebreeches,bearingmyassandthemostsensitivepartsofmetohim.
Myheadswungtothesideinsurprise.Istartedtoturn—
Arumblingsoundofwarningfilled
thechamber.Instinctstilledme—allmysensesheightened.Myeyesflewtohis,
buthiswerefixedonthetearhe’dcreatedinthebreeches.Helookedas
hungryashehadbefore,butIknewitwasn’tbloodthathewasstarvedfor
now.
Heliftedmyhips,andIbarely
sawhimmove.AllIknewwasthathismouthwasonme.Airfledmylungs.Histongue
delvedinsidemyslickheatashisheadtwisted,draggingacryofpleasure
frommeasonefanggrazedmysensitivenubofflesh.Thestrokesofhistongue
werefirmanddetermined.Helickedandsucked.Hefeasted,feeding
frommeasdesperatelyashehadatmythroat.Iwaslost.Mybodytriedto
follow,butthehandsatmyhipsheldmeinplace.
Casteeldevoured
Ishookandtrembled,theheatbuilding
inmefierceandintense—almosttoointense.Myfingerscurled,pressinginto
thefloorashedraggedafangoverthebundleofnervesoncemore.Ijerked,
cryingoutatasharpprickofpain.Hismouthclosedaroundthethrobbingflesh,
andthatsensationechoedinthebitemarkonmythroat.Andthat—that—was
toomuch.
IchokedonascreamasIshattered
intothousandsofsilk-drapedshards,barelyabletoholdmyselfupastight
spasmswrackedme.Iwasstilltremblingwhenhismouthleftme.Ifeltthepress
ofhisglossylipsagainstthecenterofmyback.
“Honeydew,”hegrowled.“You
tasteofhoneydew,andyourskinsmellsofjasmine.Fuck.”
Headlimp,Ilookedbackathim.
Iwatchedhishandgototheflapofhisbreeches.Hetoreatthem,sending
littlediscsofmetalscatteringacrossthefloor.Mybodyflushedasheshoved
theruined,dirtiedbreechesdownhisleanhips,freeingthethick,hardlength
ofhiserection.
Hestretchedoverme,hismouth
grazingmyjawandthenthelineofmyneck,sendingahot,tightshiverdown
myspine.Thefeelofhisskin,nowblazinghotagainstmyback,shookme.
Hebrushedhislipsovermy
skin,andthenIfelthisfangsonthoseultra-sensitivebitemarksasthehead
ofhiscocknudgedmyslickcore.Hedidn’tpiercetheskin.Hisfangswere
justthere,holdingmeinplaceasonehandfoldedaroundmyhipagainandthe
othercurledaroundmychin.Hetiltedmyheadfartherbackandtotheside.
Anotherillicitthrillrockedme,pushingalltheairfrommylungs.Allthose
brieflyrelaxedmuscleswenttautoncemore.Ipantedasasharpswirlof
anticipationsliceditswaythroughme.
“I’mnot…”Hisbodyshook
againstmine,hisfingerstremblingagainstmycheeks,mythroatandarms,as
hedraggedthemdown,followingthecurveofmywaist.Hegrippedmyhips,his
fingerspressingintothefleshthere,andwhenhespoke,hisvoicewasthick
andneedy,acoarseandraggedwhisper.“I’mnot…I’mnotincontrol.”
Apoundingpulseofdesirefollowed
thosewords,becomingaroarinmyblood.Itwassuchanintensewaveof
sensation,leavingthetipsofmybreaststight,andtheverycoreofme
throbbingalloveragain.“NeitheramI.”
“Thankfuck,”hegrunted,and
thenhismouthclosedovermine.
Afterendingthekiss,Casteel
struck,sinkinghisfangsintomythroatashethrustdeeply,allthewaytothe
hilt.Icriedout,mybackarching.Thetwistingacheofpain-tingedpleasure
toreitswaythroughmybody,sparkingeverynerveandignitingintoablazeof
wild,rawsensationthatbecamepureecstasy.Thefeelofhimfillingme,
stretchingme,leftnoroomforanythingelse.Hispresencedominated.
Casteelheldmethere,onmy
handsandknees,backarchedwithhisfangsstilldeepinthesideofmythroat.
Therewasnohesitation,nomomentofreprieve.Hemovedbehindme,fastand
hard,anddrankfromme,deepandlong.Ifelteachpullagainstmythroatand
everytugandpushofhisthrobbinglengththroughouttheentiretyofmybody.
Hisweight—theforceofhowhelungedinandout—tookmetothefloor,trapping
methere.Thecoldpressofthewoodagainstmybreasts,andtheheatofhis
bodyonmybackashekeptmyheadlifted,neckexposed,wasasinfulshock.
Suddenly,heliftedmeontomy
kneesagain,drawingmebacksoIwasflushwithhischest.Thetunicfinally
slippedfreeofmywrists,buthisarmsnaggedmine,pinningthembelowmy
breasts.Histhrustswerearagingstorm,andthesoundshemadeashefed—the
soundsImadeashetookme—werescandalous.AndIreveled
init.
Herosewithoutwarning,
standingwithonepowerfulsurge.Araggedgaspofsurprisepartedmylipsas
myfeetleftthefloor.Goodgods,hisstrength…
Casteelturnedsharply,pressing
meagainstthebedpost.“Braceyourself,myQueen.”
Ialmostcameagain,rightthere,
atthesoundofhisrawdemand.Grippingthebeam,Ihadnowayofpreparing
myself.Notashedrewmetothetipsofmytoes,hishipschurningagainstmy
ass.Hishandfistedinmyhairashetuggedmyheadback.
Thefeelofhismouthclosing
overhisbitemarksentafloodofpoundingdesirethroughme.Heshifted,pulling
meawayfromthebeamandthenpressingmedownsomyhipswereagainstthe
hardboardatthefootofthebed.Hismouthwasstillfusedtomyneck,andhe
wasstillsodeep,drivingintome,overandover.Myfingersdugintotheblanket
asIpantedforbreath.Oneofhisarmshookedundermyknee.Heliftedmyleg,
changingtheangle,deepeninghisthrusts,andintensifyingthefeelofhim.
Andthenhewentwild
Therewasnowheretogo,no
escapingthefirethehardpoundofhishipsfanned,orthewild,rawnessof
howhismouthmovedatmythroat.AndIdidn’twanttoflee.Ididn’tknowwhat
thatsaidaboutme,toknowtherewasnocontrol,norestraint.Thatthiswasa
claiming,andIwillinglywentintothoseflamesastheheadboardbangedagainst
thewallinafast,almosterraticthump.Thesounds.Theslickfeelofhim.
Theutterdominance—
Mybodystiffened,tightened.
Thereleasewassuddenandsharp,explodingthroughmeinpulsingwaves.And
still,hedidn’tstop.Heplungedinandout,hishipsrollingandgrinding
untilIwasspinningandfalling—
Casteeltorehismouthfrommy
neckandpulledout.Heturnedmeontomybackandgrabbedmyhips,pullingmeto
theedgeofthebed.Andthenhewasthrustingintomeagain.Myheadkickedback
asIgasped—
Hefroze,staringdownatme…
Ifollowedhisgaze,trailing
downthedelicategoldenchaintowherehisringrestedbetweenmybreasts.
“I’vewornitclosetomyhearteversinceIreceivedit.”
Casteelshuddered,andhismouth
camedownovermine,silencingashoutashegroundhishipsagainstme.He
kissedandkissed,andthenhismouthleftmine,hisheadlifting.Thoseruby-red
lipsparted.
“Neveragain,”hesnarled,his
wordpunctuatedbydeep,stunningthrusts.“Neveragainarewetakenfromone
another.”
“Never,”Iwhispered,shuddering
atthetasteofhim—mybloodandme—nowlingeringonmylips.
Hisheaddipped,thistimetomy
breast.Theedgesofhisfangsdrewacrossapeakandthensankintotheskin.
Myentirebodybowedashismouthclosedovertheturgidflesh.
Isweptmyarmsaroundhim,
cradlinghisheadtomeasIwrappedmylegsaroundhisplunginghips.He
stokedthefireoncemore,enflamedmeuntilmuscleslowanddeepinsideme
clenched—tighteningandcoiling.Casteelgrunted,groaned,hismovements
becomingjerkyandfrenzied.Mysensessnappedopenwide,connectingmetohim,
andallIfeltandtastedwashislust,hislove.Itmatchedmine,surrounding
bothmeandhim.NeverhadIfeltanythinglikethis—likehim
“Iloveyou,”Igaspedasall
thatcoilingtensionstartedtounfurl.
Hismouthleftmybreastandfound
mine.“Always,”hebreathedandthrustindeepandhard,stiffening.Therewas
nostoppingusfromtumblingovertheedge,shuddering,shaking,andfalling
intobliss.
Together.
Always.
Andforever.
Chapter32
Casteel
IwatchedPoppydragthewashclothdownmyarm,wiping
awaysoapyresidue,myattentionrapt.Obsessed.
Theshirtthathadbeengivento
herslippeddownoncemore,baringacreamyshoulder.She’dbattledthatsleeve
sinceshe’dputthetunicon,andforonce,Iwasgladshewaslosingawar
Therewasafreckleonthatshoulder.
I’dnevernoticeditbefore.Justbelowthedelicatebone.Itplayedpeekaboo
throughthestrandsofherhair,whichwerenowfreeofthebraidandfallingin
ariotofloosewavesandhalf-formedcurls.
Poppyhadchanged.
Thesprinklingoffrecklesacross
thebridgeofhernoseandcheekshaddarkenedfromhertimespentinthesun.
Herhairhadgrown,thosestill-dampendsfromthequickbathshe’dtakennearly
reachingthecurveofherass.Herfacehadslimmedslightly.Ididn’tthink
anyoneelsewouldhavenoticed,butIdid,anditmademethinkthatshehadn’t
beeneatingwell.Andthat…
Icouldn’tthinkaboutthat
withoutwantingtoteardownthewallsaroundus.Thekindmortalswho’d
shelteredusdidn’tdeservethat,soIfocusedonhereyes.
Everytimethethickfringesof
herlasheslifted,itfeltlikethewholedamnhouseshifted.
Hereyeswerelikethey’dbeen
whenwedreamedofeachother—springgreenpiercedbywispsofluminoussilver.
AndtheyhadstayedlikethatsinceI’dfoundmyselfagain.
Butthechangeinherwasmore
thanphysical.Therewasastillnessabouthernowthathadneverbeen
therebefore.Notexactlyacalmnesssincetherewasstillsomefreneticenergy
abouther,asifhermerepresenceinfluencedtheairaroundher.Butsomething
aboutherwasdeepandsettlednow.Aconfidence?Anawakening?Ididn’tknow.
Whateveritwas,shewasthemostbeautifulbeingI’deverseen.
Ihadn’ttakenmyeyesoffher
forlongerthanittooktoblink.BadshitcamewhenIdid.Asenseofsurrealness—or
apanickedfearthatthiswassomesortofhallucination.Ithadhappenedwhen
Isteppedintotheadjoiningbathingchambertorelievemyselfandmakeuseofthe
razorandcreamthathadbeenbroughtinwiththewater.Ithadbeendark.No
electricity.Thedimlightfromthebedchamberdidnothingtoshatterthe
darkness.Foramoment,IthoughtIwasbackthereinthatcell.Ifeltthe
shacklesatmywristsandankles.Mythroat.I’dlockedup,onehandonthesink
basin,andtheotherclutchingthehandleoftherazor.
ThatwashowPoppyhadfoundme.
She’dbroughtthelampinside,placing
itbythevanity.Nothingwassaid.She’djustwrappedherarmsaroundmy
waist,pressingherselfagainstmyback,andshe’dremainedthatwayuntilthe
panickedfearabated.UntilI’dfinishedshavingawaytheitchybristlesof
growth.
Icouldn’tbelievethatshewas
here.
Icouldn’tbelieveIwas
here.Piecedbacktogether.Almostwhole.Mymemorieshadgaps.Darkvoidscaused
bythebloodlust.ButIwassittinginahiptub,nestledinthecornerofachamber,
underwhatIcould’veswornwasapaintingoftheSkotosMountains.
WhilePoppyhadgentlycoaxedme
intothewarm,cleanwater,insistingonbeingtheonetowashawaythefilth,
she’dsharedwithmeallthathadoccurred.TheeventsinMassene.Theold
womanwiththestolenPrimalessence.WhathadgonedowninOakAmbler.Tawny’s
strangerecoveryandthetruthtowhoVikterwas.Whatshe’dbornewitnessto
beneathCastleRedrockandattheTempleofTheon.WhatIsbethhadtoldher
aboutherfather.ThereasonMalikhadremained.Iknewsomeofit.Some,I
didn’t.Muchofitleftmydamnchestaching,andangersimmeringinmygut,
ruiningthethick,herb-ladenstewthathadbeenbroughtin.
IhatedtheguiltIsaw
skitteringacrossherface.Thelingeringpain.IknewmyQueencouldstandon
herown.Iwasherebecauseofherstrength.Hercourage.ButIshould’vebeen
theretoshouldersomeoftheweightIknewshebore.
Shehadn’tbeenalone,though.
Ihadtokeepremindingmyself
ofthat.Itwastheonlythingkeepingmefromdescendingintoadifferentkind
ofbloodlust.Shehadsupport.Kieranhadbeenwithher.Aswellasothers,but
Kieran…yeah,knowingshehadhimwashowIkeptthebuildingrageincheck.
HowproudIwasofher—ofall
shehadaccomplished—alsohelped.Poppywasfuckingextraordinary.
AndIhadbeennothingbuta
monsterchainedtoawallwhenshecameforme,unabletodoadamnthingto
helpassistinourescape.Pressuresettledonmychest.I’dbeenaliability.
Thedangerous,weaklink.
Fuck.Thatwasahardtruthtoswallow.
“Youknow,”Poppysaid,drawing
mefrommythoughtsassheloweredmyrighthandintothewater.“Those
breechesyoudestroyed?”Herstartlinglystrangeandbeautifuleyesliftedto
mineasshepickedupmyleftarmandsetaboutwipingthesudsaway.“They
weretheonlypairofpantsIhave.”
Someofthetightnesseasedfrom
mychest.Nodoubtshehadsensedthetangledemotionsbehindwheremythoughts
hadgone.“IwouldsayI’msorry,butI’dbelying.”
Awrygrinappearedasshedrew
thewashclothovermyupperarm.“Iappreciatethehonesty.”
Iwatchedherheadtilt.The
wine-huedstrandsslippedtotheside,revealingthepuckered,redpuncturewounds
onherthroat.Thesightofthemcausedadualreaction,whichresultedinmyhead
anddickbeingcompletelyatoddswitheachother.
SomethingIwasn’tentirely
accustomedtosincetheywereusuallyonthesamepagewhenitcametoPoppy.
“Hadyoueverheardof
viktorsbefore?”sheasked.
“No,butgiventhewayVikter
waswithyou,itmakessense.”Themanhadbehavedasifhe’dbeenPoppy’s
fatherandhadn’tbeenallthatimpressedbyme.Mademewonderexactlyhowmuch
theviktorsknewandsaw.
“Tawnysaidthathewasproudof
me,”shewhispered.
Istilled.“Didyouthinkhe
wasn’t?”
“Idon’tknow,”sheadmitted,
hervoicehoarse.“Ihopedso.”
“Hehadtobe,whetherornothe
knewwhathispurposewasasaviktorornot,”Iinsistedquietly.“There’s
nowayhecouldn’thavebeen.”
Shenodded.
Ileanedovertopressakissto
thetopofherforehead.“Thatman—orwhateverhewas—lovedyouasifyouwere
hisownfleshandblood.Hewasproudofyou.”
Poppyblinkedrapidly,givingme
asoftsmile.“Sitback.I’mnotdonewithyou.”
“Yes,myQueen.”Ididasshe
ordered,andsheinchedcloser,herbrowpinchingwithaquickwince.My
stomachdropped.“DidIhurtyou?”
Hereyesrosetomineagain.
“You’vealreadyaskedmethatquestionfivetimes.”
“Seventimes,actually.”Ionly
hadbriefmemoriesoffeedingfromher—atherwristandthenatherthroat.I
rememberedenoughtoknowIhadn’tbeengentle.Thelarger-than-normalwounds
onherthroatwereproofofthat.“DidI?”
PoppysawwhatIstaredat.“Your
bitebarelyhurt.”
She’dsaidthatbefore,andI
knewshelied.IalsoknewIhadn’texactlytakencarewithallthathadcome
after.“Youwinced.”
“Itwasn’tthat.Justabadpain
inmytempleorjaw.Nothingtodowithyou.It’salreadygone.”
Iwasn’tsureIbelievedher.“I
wasroughwithyou.Thenandafter.”
Thewashclothstilledjustabove
mywrist.“Ienjoyedeverymomentofthatandthensome.”
Arushofsatisfactionhitme,
buttherewasnoego-fueledsmugness.Anotherburgeoningworrytookshapeasmy
mindcontinuedputtingitselftogether.Poppyhadsharedalotwithme,but
therewasonethingshehadn’tmentioned.“Didyoueverfindoutifyouneedto
feed?”
Poppysatback,stillholdingmy
armasshenodded.“Apparently,allgodshavetofeed—supposedlynotasmuchas
Atlantians,andagoddoesn’thavetofeedoffanothergodoranAtlantian.Any
bloodworks,aslongasit’snotadraken’s.”Shepaused,herbrowpinching.
“It’snotreallyclearhowoftenIneedtofeed.Usingmyabilitieswillspeed
uptheneed,aswillinjuries.”
“Thenyouneedtofeed.”I
startedtoliftmywristtomymouth—
Poppystoppedme,hergriponmy
armwarm.“Youneedeverydropofbloodyouhave.Youneedevenmoreblood.”
“Itookalot,Poppy.”
“Ifeelfinerightnow,”she
said,tiltingforwardoncemore,hergazesteadyonmine.“AndIdidhavetofeed
acoupleofdaysago,rightbeforewehittheroadbetweenThreeRiversand
Whitebridge.I’dstartedtofeeltheneedtofeed.I…Ihadto.”
“Kieran,”Isaid,myeyessearching
hers.“YoufedfromKieran.”
Herheadcockedtotheside.
“WhyamInotsurprisedthatyousomehowknewthat?”
KnowingthatKieranhadgivenher
thisaidbroughtnothingbutrelief.Hewould’vemadesureshewascomfortable
andsafe,andthattherewasn’tevenanounceofshametobefelt.Gods,Iowed
himsomuch.“Icouldn’tseeyougoingtoanyoneelse.You’reclosetoDelano
andVonetta—andtheothers—butKieranis…it’sdifferentwithhim.”
“Itis,”shewhispered,bending
andkissingthedampskinofmyarm.“Ialsofiguredhewastheonepersonyou
wouldn’tmindfeedingme.”
“Iwouldn’tcarewhoyouusedif
youhadthatneed.”
Sheraisedabrow.“Really?”
“Really.”
“So,ifIhaddecidedtofeed
fromEmil?”shesuggested,andmyjawclenched.“OrNaill—”
“Okay.You’reright,”Iadmitted.
Nomatterwhoshesoughtaidfrom,Ineverwould’vehelditagainsther.The
otherperson?Thoughtsandprayersfortheirass,though.“Kieranistheonly
one.”
Poppylaughedsoftly.“Iwaited
foraslongasIcouldbecauseIdidn’twanttodoitwithanyonebutyou.”
“Becauseofmyselfish-as-hell
nature,Iappreciatethesentiment.But,Poppy,Iwouldn’twantyoutowait.
Youknowthat,right?”Isearchedouthergaze.“Yourwell-beingtrumpsmyillogical
jealousy.”
“Iknow.Ireallydo.”Herteeth
draggedacrossherlowerlip.“Itwasdifferentthanfeedingfromyou.Imean,
IcouldreadKieran’smemories,butitwasn’tlikeitisbetweenus.”
“It’snotalwayslikeitiswith
us.”Ireachedoverwithmyrightarm,tuckingastraypieceofhairbehindher
ear.“It’snotalwayssointense.Wecancontroltheemotionssurroundingthe
feedingtoacertainextent,justlikewecanmakethebitesomethingone
shouldfearorcrave.”
“Iwaswonderingaboutthat,”
sheadmittedwithagrin.“Ifyoufeltlikethatwhenyoufedfromothers.You
know,for…knowledgepurposes.”
“Yes,forknowledge.”Smiling,I
trailedmyfingersdownhercheek.
Herchinlifted.“Whyelsewould
Ibeasking,ifnotforeducationalpurposes,Cas?”
Itrembled.Therewasnostopping
thatreaction.“Youshouldn’tcallmethat.”
Hernosewrinkled.“Why?You
likeitwhenIdo.”
“That’stheproblem.Ilikeit
toomuch,”Itoldher,andshesmiled,wideandbright.And,gods,Icouldlive
onthosesmiles.Thrive.“There’sstillalotweneedtotalkabout.”
Awholehellofalot.
Poppy’ssmilefadedjustabit
asIdroppedmyrighthandbacktothesideofthetub.“Iknow.Ifigurewe
cantalkabouthowwe’regoingtogetoutofCarsodoniaonceKieranandyour
brotherreturn.”
Mybrother.
Itightenedmygripontherim
ofthetub.HeandKieranwereouttherewhilethemiststillblanketedthe
city,makingsurenoonenearbyhadalertedtheCrownofanysuspiciousoccurrences.
Poppyglancedatthedoor.“I
hopetheydon’tharmeachother.”Herbrowcreased.“Toobadly.”
“YouworryforMalik?”Iraised
abrow.“Youbelievehim?”
“Ibelievehespokethetruth
aboutwhyhestayed.Itastedhisemotions.Helovesher.Buttherewasalsoa
lotofguiltandagonyunderthat.Idon’tknowifthat’sforwhathe’sdoneby
stayinghereorsomethingelse.”
Alittlebitofempathycrept
intome.Notalot.Icouldn’tfeelsorryforhimoranythinguntilIknewfor
surethathewasn’tplayingus.
UntilIknewifI’dhavetokill
himornot.
Beyondthat,Ididn’tknowwhat
tothink.IwantedtobelievethatlovedroveMalik’schoices,butthe
knowledgethathe’dchosentheRevenantoverhisfamilyandkingdomdidn’tsitwell
withme
NeitherdidtheknowledgethatI
would’vedonethesameforPoppy.
ButthisRevenant…
Poppy’ssister
Howdidshefactorintoallof
this?
AndhowinthehellwasIgoing
totellPoppyabouther?
Poppyresumedtrailingthecloth
overmyhand,alongthegoldenmarriageimprint.Hermovementsstilledonce
more.“Doesitstillhurt?”shewhispered.
Ilookeddowntoseethatshe
staredatwhatremainedofmyfinger.Theinfectionwasgone.ThankstoPoppy’s
blood,newskin,nowaglossypink,stretchedovertheonceexposedboneandtissue.
AndmaybeMalik’said.
Whatthefuckever.
“Whathurtsisknowingthatyou
knewitwasdone.”
Pressingherlipstogether,she
shookherheadashereyesclosedbriefly.“Ishould’vebeenthelastthingyou
wereworriedabout.”
“Youwillalwaysbethefirst
thingIworryabout.”
Avisibletremorshookheras
sheleanedforward,pressingakisstotheknuckle.Placingmyhandbackinto
thewater,shedrapedtheclothovertherimofthetub.Shereachedbehindher
neck,liftingthegoldenchainandthering.“Thisisyours.Itbelongswith
you.”Hereyesliftedtomine,brightandmesmerizing.“Canyouwearitonyour
righthand?”
Iclearedmythroat,butitwas
stillscratchy.“Icanwearitwhereveryouwantmeto.”
“Wherever?”sheteased,even
whileherfingerstrembledassheworkedtheclasponthechain.
“Whereveryouwant,”Iaffirmed.
“Onanyfingerortoeofyourchoosing.Icanhaveitpiercedtomynipple.Or
haveitmeltedintoaboltandpiercedinmycock—actually,youmightenjoy
that.”
Poppy’sgazeflewtomine.“In
your…cock?”
Saidcockhardenedatthesound
ofhersayingthat,athowherlipspartedaroundtheword.Inodded.
Hercheekspinkenedasshe
tippedforward.“That’spossible?”
“Itis.”
“Wouldn’tthatpiercinghurtto
havedone?”
“Probablyhurtslikethefires
oftheAbyss.”
Sheglanceddownatthering.A
momentpassed.“And…andwhywouldIfindthatenjoyable?”
Gods.
Ilovedhercuriosity.
“I’veheardthatmanyfindtheruboftheballthatholdstheboltinplaceto
beverypleasurable.”
“Oh.”Shedrewinadeepbreath.
“Anddoesthewearerofsuchapiercingfinditpleasurable?”
“Oh,yeah.”Igrinnedasthe
colorinhercheeksspreaddownherthroat.
“Interesting,”shemurmured,her
browcreasingoncemore.Iwould’vegivenanythingtoknowwhatshewas
thinking.Butsheliftedthering.“Ithinkyourpointerfingeronyourright
handwilldo.”Asmallgrinappeared.“Fornow.”
Ichuckledroughly.“Fornow.”
SheroseontoherkneesasI
offeredhermyrighthand.Mychestseized.Neverwould’vethoughtIcouldgo
fromtalkingaboutcockpiercingstobeingchokedupinunderaminute,but
hereIwas.Throatclogged,Iwatchedherslidetheringontomyrightpointer
finger,thegoldwarmfrombeingsoclosetoherbody.Afeelingofcompleteness
surgedinseeingtheringthere.
Alittlebitofrenewal.
Herbeautifuleyesglimmeredas
theyheldmine.“You…youkeepaskingifI’mokay,butareyou?”
Mychestclenchedagain,butthe
feelingwascolderandmorebrutal.Inasecond,Itastedthebitterpanicof
beingtrapped—chainedandunabletodoanythingtofightbackeffectively.
TobeofanyaidtoPoppy.
“Cas,”shewhispered.
AraggedbreathleftmeasI
threadedmyfingerswithhers.“IthinkIneedtoworkonrebuildingthosemental
shieldsaroundyou.”
“I’mnottryingtoreadyouremotions.”
Poppypursedherlips.“Okay.That’salie.Iam.IknowIshouldn’t.It’sjust
that…Idon’tknowwhatyouwentthrough,andIsawthemarksonyourbody.The
cuts.Thereweresomany.”
“Theytookmyblood,”Itold
her,gazefollowingherstoourjoinedhands.“Dailyforawhile.Theyputitin
thesevials.IassumeditwasbeingusedfortheRevenants,buttheystopped
doingitacoupleofdaysbeforeyouarrived.”
“Isbethmight’vebeenusingit
fortheRevenants,butIthinkshecould’vebeenusingitfortheRoyal
Blessing.”She,too,staredatourhands,andalongmomentpassed.“Did
she…didtheytreatyouliketheyhadbefore?”
MychestburnedasIliftedmy
gazetoherface.“Noonetouchedmethistime.Notlikethat.”
Ashudderingbreathlefther.
“I’mrelievedtohearthat,butitdoesn’tmakeanyofwhatwasdonebetter.
Notwhenshekeptyouinthatplace.Youhadbitemarksonyourleg.You’dbeen
starved—”Cuttingherselfoff,sheinhaleddeeply.Whenhereyeslifted,Isawthat
thesilverwispsofeatherhadbecomeluminous.“Iknowyou’regoingtotellme
thatyou’reokay.Thatyou’refine.AndIknowyou’restrong.You’rethe
strongestpersonIknow,buttheyhurtyou.”
Shebent,kissingtheknuckle
belowthering.Thefeelingofherlipsbeatbackthethreateningchill.“Youonce
toldmethatIdidn’talwayshavetobestrongwhenIwaswithyou.Thatitwas
safeformenottobeokay,”shesaid,andthemusclesinmyneckcramped.
“YoutoldmethatitwasyourdutyasmyhusbandtomakesureIknewthatI
didn’thavetopretend.Well,it’smydutyasyourwifetomakesureyouknow
that,too.You’remyshelter,Cas.Myroofandmywalls—myfoundation.AndIam
yours.”
Ajaggedknotfilledmythroat
asIfoundmyselfstaringatthepaintingofthemist-shroudedmountains.Theinclination
totellherthatIwasfinewasthere.It’swhatI’ddonethelasttimewhenmy
parentsoranyoneasked.EvenKieran.Evenwhenlyingtohimwaspointless.Ididn’t
wantanyofthemtoworry.They’dalreadyspentenoughtimedoingthat.AndI
didn’twanttoputthatonPoppy.Shealreadycarriedenough.
ButIdidn’thavetopretend
withher.
Notanymore.
Iwassafewithher.
“TherewasatimethatIfeared
Iwouldneverhearyousaymynameoutsideofadream.”Thewordswerehardand
rough,butIforcedthemout.“Itwasn’tthatIfearedyouwouldn’tcomeforme.
Iknewyouwould.Thatknowledgealsoscaredthehelloutofme,butitwasthe
darknessofthecell.Thehunger.Theknowledgethat,eventually,itwouldget
me,andIwouldbreak.Fractureagain.Iwouldn’tevenrecognizemynameto
knowthatitwasyouwhospokeit.So,yeah,I’mnot…”Iswallowed.“I’mnot
completelyfine,butIwillbe.”
“Yes,”shewhispered.“Youwill
be.”
Neitherofussaidanythingfor
severallongmoments.Finally,Ilookedather,andallIsawwasdevotion
inhereyes.
Tobeonthereceivingendof
that?Itmademyfuckingheartskip.
“Idon’tdeserveyou.”
“Stopsayingthat.Youdo.”
“Itrulydon’t.”Iliftedour
hands,pressingakisstothetop.“ButI’llmakesurethatIamworthyfrom
nowon.”
“ThenI’llmakesurethatyou
realizeyoualreadyare.”
Afaintgrinpulledatmylips.
“Ishouldprobablygetoutofthistub.Kieranhastobebackbynow.”Andthere
werethingsIneededtotellher.ThingsIneededtoremember.
“Heis.”Slippingherhandfree,
shereachedforatowelthathadbeenplacednearby.“Hetoldmethroughthenotam.
Justacoupleofminutesago.Ithinkthey’regivingusspace.”
“Ihavetoadmit,”—grippingthe
sidesofthetub,Irose.Waterranoffme,fallingindrips—“I’mkindof
jealousofthatnotamthing.”
“Yeah,well,Ihavethat,but
youallhavethefangs,thespecialhearing,seeing,andsmelling.”Sherose,
too,andmyattentionimmediatelygotcaughtonthehemofthatshirtandhow
itflutteredaroundthosethighs,barelycoveringthethickcurveofherass.
“So,Ithinkit’sonlyfairthatIhavethis.”
Idraggedmygazeupward.“Ibet
you’restilldisappointedaboutnotbeingabletoshiftintoanything.”
“Ireallyam.”Shedrewthe
towelovermyarmsandthendownmychest.
“Icandrymyself.”
“Iknow,”shesaidasshe
motionedformetostepoutofthetub.“ButIamfeelingratherhelpfulright
now.”
“Uh-huh,”Imurmured,watching
herdragtheclothalongmyhipandovermylowerstomach,wherethemusclesstood
outfarmorestarklythantheyshouldhave
Ineededmoreofthatstewanda
lotofprotein.Herbloodwouldhelpfillmeout,butsomeoftheweightI
wouldhavetopackontheold-fashionedway.
Thetowelraspedovermyback
andthenlowerasPoppywalkedaroundme.Andthen,Istoppedthinkingabout
allthecaloriesIneededtoconsume.
Poppywassuddenlyonherknees
beforeme,movingtheslightlyroughtoweldownmyleftleg.Herhead…fuck,it
wasrightthere.Inchesfrommydick,andtherewasnowayI
couldignorethat.Mythroatdried.Sheguidedthetowelbackup,alongthe
insideofmyleg,slowly.Upandup,shewent.Atighttremorofanticipation
shotthroughme.Thebackofherhandbrushedmysac,andmyentirebody
clenched.
Shemovedontotheotherleg,
herfeaturesutterlyserene.Innocent.Asifshehadnoideawhatthat
touchhaddone.Bullshit.Sheknew.Thesmallcurveatthecornerofherlipstold
mesoasshestartedtheslow,torturousclimbbackupmyleg.
“Poppy,”Iwarned,knowingdamn
wellthatifshecontinued,talkingwouldbethelastthingonmymind.Hell,
itwasalreadyquicklybecomingthat.
“Hmm?”Shedrewthetowelalong
thebackofmythigh.
“I’msureyou’renotunaware—”I
clampedmyjawshutasherhandbrushedbetweenmylegsoncemore.
“Unawareofwhat?”sheasked,
herbreathcaressingthefleshofmythigh.
“Ofwhatyou’redoing,”Isaid
hoarsely.
Droppingthetowel,sheplaced
herhandsonthesidesofbothofmylegsandlookedupatme.Well,notall
thewayup.Poppy’sgazedidn’tgopastmyrigidlength.Herstare.Thewayher
lipsparted.Herflushedcheeks.Noneofthathelpedkeepmythoughtsontrack.
“IknowexactlywhatI’mdoing,”
shesaid,trailingherhandsupthesidesofmylegs.
“Andwhatexactlyare
youdoing?”
“Showingyoujusthowdeserving
youare.”
Iopenedmymouth,butshe
stretchedhigherandpressedherlipstotheoldscarjustinsidemyhip.The
brandthatneverquitefaded.
Thatkiss.
Itwreckedme.
Andshedidn’tstopthere.Those
softlipstrailedapathacrossmythigh.Iwasrock-hard,andshehadn’teven
touchedmeyet.Notreally.Thereactionhadnothingtodowiththeabsenceof
sexthelastseveralweeks.I’dgonefar,farlongerthanthat.Thispunch-to-the-gut
kindoflusthadeverythingtodowithher.
Poppydrewbackjustenoughfor
metoseetheblushonhernoseandcheeksasshecurledherfingersaroundthe
baseofmydick.Chokingonhername,Ialmostcamerightthere.
Fracturedgreen-and-silvereyes
metmineasshedrewherhanddownmylength.“Iloveyou,Cas.”
“Always?”Ibitout.
“Andforever.”Hervoicethickened
assheslidherpalmalongmeslowly.“Becauseyou’reworthy.”
Itrembled,myhandsopeningand
closingatmysides.Afaintsheenofsweatbrokeoutovermyforeheadasshe
movedherpalmdownmylengthagain.Herstrokeswereslowandtentative.And
hermouth…godsdamn.Herhotlittlepantsofbreathteasedtheheadofmycock.
Shehadn’teventakenmeinhermouthyet,butIcouldalreadyfeelthefamiliar
coilingatthebaseofmyspine,thatdeeptightening.“I’llbelieveanything
yousayrightnow.”
Herlaughwaslight,teasingthe
headofmydick.“Believeit.Becauseifyouweren’t?”Thathandkeptmoving,
slowandsteadyandhot.“Iwouldn’tbeonmykneesbeforeyou.”
“No.Youwouldn’tbe,”Igasped,
unabletokeepmyhandsatmysides.Itouchedhercheek.Threadedmyfingers
throughhersilkyhair.“It’sfunny,though.”
“Whatis?”
“Imaybetheonestanding,but
it’smewhoisstillbowingtoyou.”
Hersmilewaswide,crinklingthe
skinatthecornersofhereyes.And,gods,thosesmiles…theyweretoorare.
Tooexquisite.
“Deserving,”shewhispered.
Andthenshetookmeintoher
mouth.
Myshoutwasrough,echoingthrough
thesmallchamber.Probablythewholedamnbuilding.Ididn’tcare.Theentire
worldcenteredonthefeelofhermouth,theslideofhertongueasshekept
movingherhand,workingmewithartfulperfection.
ButIkeptmyselfstill.I
didn’ttugonherhair.Ididn’tfuckhermouth.Ididn’t—
Poppytookmedeep—deeperthanI
thoughtshewould—andsucked.Myhipsjerked.Myhandtightenedinherhair.I
nearlyrosetothetipsofmytoes.“WhatgodsdamnchapterinMissWilla’s
diarywasthatin?”
Herlaughwasahumthatnearly
brokeme,andIcouldsensetherapidincreaseinherpulseandbreath.She
enjoyedthis,findingpleasureinpleasuringme.Andthatwasitsownpowerful
aphrodisiac.Myhipsmovedthen.Icouldn’tstopmyself.Myhandflattenedon
thebackofherhead.Myheadfallingback,Ishook.Nothing.Nothinginany
realmcomparedtoher.Iwasclose,thetighteningbecomingtaut.Mythrustswere
lessshallow,lessgentle.
Groaning,Ipulledoutofher
mouth.Herhandonmyhipfirmed,butIgavehernochoice.Ihauledheronto
herfeetandbroughtmymouthtohers.Shetastedofthefruitydrinkthathad
beenservedwiththestew.Ibackedherup,liftingtheborrowedtunic.
“Youshouldbeproudofme,”I
saidwhenwepartedlongenoughformetopulltheshirtoverherhead.“I
didn’ttearthisoff.”
Herlaughwasmypersonalsun.
“Veryproud.”
Iguidedhertothebed,visions
ofsettlingbetweenthoseplumpthighsandsinkingdeepintoherdancinginmy
head.ButPoppyplacedherhandsonmyshouldersandturnedme.
Pushingmedowntomyassand
thenontomyback,sheclimbedontothebed,herkneesoneithersideofmy
hips,straddlingme.
“Fuck,”Igasped,myheart
pounding.
Herhairfellforward,slidingagainst
mychestasshereachedbetweenus,palmingmycock.Ididn’tevenknowwhatI
saidwhenIfeltherwetheatagainsttheheadofmycock.Could’vebeenaprayer.
Myhandswenttoherhips,steadyingherasshebegantolowerherself,inchby
sweet,hotinch.Ifearedthiswouldbeoverbeforesheevenfullyseated
herself.
“Gods,”shebreathed,stiffening
asourpelvisesmet.Thefingersonmychestdugin.Asoft,femininesoundleft
herasshewithdrewslowly,towhereonlythetipwasleft,andthenslidback
down.
Poppycontinuedthebreathtaking
riseandfall,findingherrhythmandangle.Herbackarchedassherocked
aboveme.
Ilikedcontrol.Hadalwaysbeen
thatway.ButwithPoppy…watchingherfindherway,watchingherliveand
lovewithoutshame?Nothingwasmorepowerful.Moreearth-shattering.I’d
gladlygiveupcontroloverandoverforthis—forher.
Butthenshebegantoreally
move.
Faster.Harder.Imethermovements,
fingerssinkingintothefleshofherhips.Thefeelofherwasslickandtight
asshesqueezedmydick.Thesightofher—herfullbreasts,thecurveofher
waist,thecreasesatherthighs,andallthatflushedflesh—wasmyundoing.
Poppygrippedmyleftwrist,drawing
thehandthat’doncehadtheringfromherhiptoherbreast—herheart.Her
fingersthreadedwithmine.
Sheownedme.
Heartandsoul.
Assherodemeharder,Islida
handtowherewewerejoined.Ifoundthatbundleofnerves,pressingdownwith
mythumb.
“Oh,gods,”shecriedout,andI
feltherspasmaroundmeasshejerked.
“Ithinkyoulikethat.”I
groanedasshegroundagainstme.
“Ido,”shepanted.“Alot.”
Herbreathymoansandmygrunts
filledthedimlylitchamber,joiningtheslicksoundsofourbodiescoming
together.Myfangsthrobbed.Iwantedhervein,butI’dalreadytakentoomuch.
So,IfocusedonhowshefitasifIweremadeforher.Howshemovedoverme
withwildabandonandalltheloveandtrustshegavetome.Wasalwaysgiving
me.
Iwantedtostaydeepinsideher
forhours—losemyselfinher.Butshewasinme,undermyskin,andwrapped
aroundmyheartastightlyasshewasaroundmycock.
Bracingherself,sheleaned
forward,curlingherhandundermyhead.Shebroughtmymouthtoherbreast.To
thehardnippleandthetwopuncturewoundsI’dleftbehindearlier.Iclosed
mymouthoverthehardenednub.
“Feed,”shewhisperedagainst
thetopofmyhead,herhipsrolling.“Bite.Please.”
Idon’tknowwhichofherwords
snappedmyrestraint.Itwasprobablytheplease.Mylipspeeledback,
andIsankmyfangsintothemarksI’dalreadyleftbehind.Shejerkedinmy
arms,cryingoutasherbodycontractedaroundmine.Herbloodhitmytongue.Warm.
Thick.Ancient.Iswallowedgreedilyanddrankdeeply,takingherintome.Her
bloodwaslightninginmyveins.Purepowerwrappedinjasmineandcashmere.
Thewaysheclampedaroundmydickwasmyundoing.Thebreathy“Cas”
thatleftherlips.Herbloodhittingmythroat,mygut.Allofitsentmeover
theedge.
Thepowerfulreleaserolleddown
myspine.Ifoldedmyarmsaroundher,pinninghertomychestasIthrustup,
liftingbothourbodiesfromthebed.Ireleasedmyfangsfromherfleshandfound
hermouth,kissingherasIcame.Thereleasefuckingdestroyedmeinthebest
way.Waveafterwave,itseemednever-ending,leavingmestunnedbyitsintensity.
ByeverythingIfeltforher.
Ittookquitesometimebefore
mypulseslowed.IkeptherwhereIwantedher—ontopofme.Inthequiet
momentsthatfollowed,Irealizedsomething.Myfingersstilledinherhairas
myeyesopened.“Poppy?”
“Yeah?”shemurmured,hercheek
plasteredtomychest.
“Ihaven’tbeenonthatherb,”I
toldher,arealfucked-upmessofconflictingemotionsfiringoff.“Theone
thatpreventspregnancy.”
“Ifigured,”shesaid,yawning.
“Istartedtakingprecautions.”
Mybrowsflewup.“Wasthatin
thediary,too?”
Poppylaughed.“No.Iasked
Vonetta,”shesaid,liftingherhead.IdecidedIreallyneededtothankNetta.
“ShetoldmewhattotakesinceababyCasteelwouldbethelastthingweneed—at
least,atthemoment.”
Confusing-as-fuckemotions
slammedintome,amixofcold,hardterrorandsweetanticipation.“Whatabout
ababyPoppy?”Ibrushedherhairback.“Withdeepredhair,freckles,andgreen-and-silver
eyes?”
“Myeyesarestilllikethat?”
“Yep.”
Shesighed.“Idon’tknowwhy
they’relikethat,butyourquestion?Areyoubeingserious?”
“Always.”
“Youarenotalwaysserious.”
“Iamnow.”
“Idon’tknow.Imean…yes?”Her
nosescrunched.“Oneday,far,far,far,farfromnow.Yes.”
“Whenwe’renotinthemiddleof
awar,forexample?”Ismiledupather.“AndI’mreadytonotbethecenterof
yourattention?”
“MorelikewhenI’mconfidentthat
Iwon’taccidentallyleavethechildsomewhereIshouldn’t.”
Ichuckled,liftingmyheadand
kissingher.“Later.”
“Later,”sheagreed.
Loweringmyhead,Ituckedher
hairback.“Iwantyoutofeed.”
“Youprobablyneedtofeedagain.”
“Probably,butthat’snotwhyI
wantyoutofeed.Idon’twantyoutogrowweak,”Itoldher.“Notever,but
especiallynotwhenwe’reinthemiddleofCarsodonia.”
Shenoddedafteramoment.“I’ll
seeifKieraniswilling—”
“He’llbewilling.”
Poppyfrowned.“Yousoundalittle
confidentforitnotbeingyourblood.”
“He’llbewilling,”Irepeated,
thinkingshereallyhadnoideawhenitcametoKieranandwhathewouldor
wouldn’twillinglydoforher.
“Whatever,”shemuttered,dropping
herchintomychest.“Weshouldgetup.Weneedtocomeupwithaplan.Dealwith
Malik.Figureouthowtogetoutofhere.Hopefully,findoutsomethingabout
Tawny’scurrentcondition.Comeback.Killthatbitch,”shesaid,andmybrows
rose.“AndthenIneedtofreemyfather.IsortofpromisedNektasI’ddo
that.Youmethimbrieflyinhisdrakenform,”evenhigher.“Myfather’sgottobeinCarsodonia—”
“He’satWayfair.”Theshadows
surroundingoneofthedarkvoidsinmymindshattered.“Isbethsaidhewas.”
Hereyeswidened.“Howdid
you…?”
“Afteryoutoldmehewasthecave
cat,Igoadedherintotalkingabouthim.Stabbedherinthechest,too.”Igrinned
asIremembered.“Didn’tkillher,butIbetithurt.”
Poppyblinked.“Youstabbedher?”
“Yeah,withaCravenbone.”
“IwishI’dseenthat.”Hereyes
werewideoncemore.“Iloveyousoverymuch.”
Ilaughedattheutterwrongness
ofthat.“Backtoyourfather?Shesaidthecavecatwaswherehewasalways
kept.”
“Wherehewasalwayskept,”she
murmuredasIsmoothedmythumbalongherjaw.“ThechambersunderWayfair,down
themainhall.”Shedippedherheadsuddenly,kissingme.“Shesaidhewasn’tin
Wayfair.”
“Shelied.”
Poppyshivered.“Thankyou.”
“Noneedtothankme.”Ikissed
her.“Youthinkyoucanfindhimagain?”
Liftingherhead,shenodded.“I
thinkso,butgettingintoWayfairagain…”
“We’llfigureitout,”Iassured
her.“Andwewilltacklethatdauntinglistofthingsyouspokeof.Together.
ExceptforkillingIsbeth.Youwantthat?It’sallyours,”Isaid,andshesmiled
inawaythatshould’veconcernedmebutonlymademeharden.
“Bytheway,mylistwasn’teven
over,”shetoldme.“There’smorestuff.TheAscended.Thepeople.Thekingdoms.
Yourparents.”
Angersparked.She’dtoldme
whatmymotherandfatherhadsaidabouteverything.“Ireallydon’twanttothink
aboutthematthemoment.”
Hergazeliftedtomine.“Iamstill
thoroughlyangrywiththem,butthey…theyloveyou.Theylovebothofyou.And
Ithinkitwasthatlovethatbecameoneofthereasonstheyneverspokethe
truth.”
“Theyfuckedup.”
“Yeah,theydid.”
“Bigtime.”
“Iknow,butthere’snothingwe
candoaboutthat.”
“Don’tbelogical,”Itoldher.
“Someonehastobe.”
Reachingdown,Isqueezedher
plumpassandwasimmediatelyfascinatedbyhowthesilverwispsinhereyes
brightenedinresponse.“Thatwasslightlyrude.”
“You’llgetoverit.”
“Possibly,”Isaid,lovingthe
smallsmilethatappearedasweteasedoneanother—thenormalcyofit.Gods,I
wouldnevertakeitforgranted.Ihatedtoruinit.ButIhadto.“Ineedto
tellyousomething.”
“Ifit’saboutyourcock
beingachangeling,Iknow,”shesaiddryly.“Icanfeelit.”
Asurprisedlaughleftme.
“Believeitornot,it’snotthat.”
“I’mshocked.”Sheyawnedagain,
snugglingagainstmychest.“Whatisit?”
Iopenedmymouth,watchingher.
Whensheblinked,hereyeswereslowtoopenandquicktocloseagain.Shewas
tired,andIdoubtedthatshe’dgottenmuchmoresleepthanIhadoverthelast
severalweeks.Notonlythat,Ihadtakenalotofblood.Shehadtobe
exhausted.
Iglancedatthesmallwindow.
Itwasdarkbeyondtheopening.Evenifthemistwasstillthick,wewouldn’t
begoinganywheretonight.NotwiththeCravenattheRise.Therewastime.
Therehadtobe.
Poppyneededtosleepandthen
feed.Thosewerethetwomostimportantthings.Evenmoreimportantthan
tellingheraboutMillicent.Andthatwasn’tmeavoidingtellingheraboutthe
Handmaiden.Iwouldn’tkeepsecretsfromhereveragain,nomatterhowbadlyI
wantedto.BecauseIknewthiswouldmessherupandwaswhysheneededtobe
restedandfed.Strong.Nooneneededtolearnthiskindofnewshalf-asleep
andweakened.
“What?”Poppyasked,hervoice
barelyaboveawhisper.“Whatdidyouwanttotellme?”
Idraggedmyhandupherback
andoverthethickstrandsofherhair.Icuppedthebackofherhead,keeping
hercheekpressedtomychest.“OnlythatIloveyou,”Isaid,liftingenough
topressakisstothetopofherhair.“Withmyheartandmysoul,todayand
tomorrow.Iwillnevergetenoughofyou.”
“Yousaythatnow…”
“Notinahundredyears.”I
lookeddownather,seeingahintofasoftsmileAbeautifulone.Icould
liveonhersmiles.Theywerethatprecious.Eachoneagodsdamngift.Icould
existonherlaughter.Thesoundwasthatimportant.Thatlife-altering.“Not
inathousandyears.NeverEnough.”
Shegavemeasqueezeandthen
startedtoliftherhead.
Istilledher.“Iknow.Weneed
togetup,butjust…letmeholdyouforalittlebit.Okay?Justafewmore
moments.”
Poppyimmediatelyrelaxed,just
likeIknewshewouldupontherequest.AndjustlikeI’dsuspected,whenher
eyesclosedoncemore,theydidn’treopen.Shefellasleep,andI…Istaredatthe
bridgeofhernose,herpartedlips,smoothingmyhandthroughherhairasMillicent’s
wordsbrokefreefromthevoid.
She’lldieinyourarms
Chapter33
Icouldn’tsleep.
NotwhenMillicent’swarning
preyedonmymind.ButIstayedwithPoppy,runningmyfingersthroughher
hair.Soakinginherwarmth.Countingthesteady,strongbeatsofherheart.
Listeningtoeachbreathshetookuntilfootstepsnearedthedoorandthen
stopped.
OnlythendidIliftherfrom
me,carefullyeasingherontoherside.Shedidn’twake.Didn’tmakeasoundas
Idrewthethinblanketoverherbody.Thatwashowexhaustedshewas.
Irose,stoppingtobrushthe
strandsofhairbackfromherfaceandkisshercheek.AscloseasIwas,Isaw
thefaintgrayshadowsunderhereyes.IttooknearlyeveryounceofcontrolI
hadtoleavethatbed,butIdid.Ideservedafuckingmedalforit.
Stoppingwhereaneatpileof
clothinghadbeenleftonasmallarmchair,Ipulledonapairofblackpants.
Buttoningtheflap,IlookedovermyshoulderatPoppy.Shesleptonherside,
justasI’dlefther,oneshoulderbaredabovetheblanket,andherhairastream
offlamesspreadacrossthebedbehindher.Aknotlodgedinmychest,abundle
ofmemories.OfthefirsttimeI’dheldherwhileshesleptonthecold,hard
groundoftheBloodForest.ThelasttimebeforeIwastaken,intheshipon
thatgentlyrockingbed.Shealwayslookedsodamnpeaceful.Beautiful.Strong.
Brave,eveninrest.
AndIwashers.
Iturnedawaybeforeclimbing
rightbackintothebed.MyfleshalreadymissedthefeelofhersasIwentto
thedoor,openingit.
Kieranwasleaningagainstthe
wall,hisheadtippedback.Hiseyesopened,lockingonmine.Hewent
completelystillasIclosedthedoor.Hismouthmoved,butIheardnowordsas
helurchedforward.Imethimhalfway.Oneorbothofusstaggeredalittleas
wecollided.Hishandtrembledasheclaspedthebackofmyneck.Theknotof
emotioninmychestgrewasIheldhimascloseasIhadPoppy,andinthat
silence,Ithankedthegods—sleeping,dead,orwhateverasIdroppedmy
foreheadtohisshoulder.ForhimbeingthereforPoppy.Forhimjustbeing
here.Forabondthickerthanbloodortradition.
“Youwhole?”Kieranaskedina
voicethatfeltasroughasmythroat.
Iclosedmyeyes.“Goingtobe.”
“Good.”Thehandatthenapeof
myneckfirmed.“Missedyou,man.Somethingfierce.”
“Same.”
“Alsowantedtopunchyouinthe
dickfordoingwhatyoudid,”hesaid,andathinlaughleftme.“Stillwantto,
tobehonest.”
“YouknowwhyIdidit.”
“Iknow.”Kieransqueezedthe
backofmyneck.“That’stheonlyreasonwhyI’mnotpunchingyourightnow.”
Ilaughedagain,liftingmy
head.“Thatandthefactyou’reafraidPoppywouldkickyourassforit.”
Hechuckledroughly.“True
story.”
Grippinghisshoulder,Imethis
stare.“YoudoknowwhyIgavemyselfup,right?IhadtostopIsbeth.Shewas
hurtingPoppy.”
“Iknow.Ido.Iwouldn’thave
expectedanythinglessfromyou,”hesaid.“Doesn’tmeanIhadtolikeit.Doesn’t
meanPoppyhadtoeither.”
Nodding,Ifeltthattremorin
hishandagain.Andknowinghimformywholelife,Isawtheshadowsofdread
inhiseyes.Theunaskedquestions.Theevilhefearedhadpreyeduponme,andthe
nightmaresheworriedwouldseearesurrection.
Iclaspedhischeekwithmyleft
handandleanedmyheadintohis.“Itwasn’tlikelasttime.Theonlything
takenfrommewasmyblood.”
Someoftheshadowsclearedbut
notallofthem.“Wasthatall,though?Truly?”
Amuscletickedinmyjaw.The
quietofthatcell.Thecoldness.Thehoursanddaysandweeksofthat—the
desperationandeverythingelse.No,thatwasn’tall.
Kieranpalmedmycheek.“Yougot
me.YougotPoppy.Youaren’talone.We’rebothhere.Alwaysandforever.”
Fuck.
Theknothitmythroatand
dampenedmyeyes.“Yeah,”Isaidinavoicefullofgravel.“Iknow.”
Hischestroseinadeepinhale,
andthenhisgazeflickedtothecloseddoor.Hedidn’task.Didn’tneedto.
“She’sasleep.”
Visiblereliefhithim.Hiseyes
closedbrieflyandthenreopened,theirisesglimmering.“She’llneedtofeed.
Itcan’tbeyou.I’lldoitassoonasshewakes.”
“Thankyou.”
“Noneedtothankmeforthat.”
“ButIdo.”
Heshrugged.“NotlikeIminded
feedingher.”
“I’msureyoudidn’t,”Ireplied
dryly.
Onesideofhislipscurledupas
hedroppedhishands.“Come.There’sstewleftonthehearth.Youneedtoeat
more.”
“Yes,Mother.”
Kieransnortedasheledmedown
theshort,narrowhall,pasttwomorecloseddoors.Ilookedbehindme,hearing
nomovement.“What’sitlooklikeoutside?”Iasked.
“Mistisfading,hereandathigher
pointsinthecity,butit’sstillthickinthelowerareas.”Kieranentereda
candlelitkitchen,pickingupabowlfromoneoftheshelvesalongthewall.
“Soundedlikethey’restilldealingwiththeCraven.Ifthey’verealizedanyof
usaremissing,they’renotoutinfullforceyet.”
“That’llchangesoonenough,”I
said,scanningthewidechamber.Blindscoveredalargewindowbehindatable
andchairs.Severaldaggerswerescatteredacrossthetable’ssurface.“How
longdoyouthinkwehave?”
“Probablytherestofthenight
andmaybetheday.”Hewenttothepotatthehearth.“We’vegottomakeour
movebeforenightfall.”
Madesense.Wewouldn’thaveto
dealwiththeknightsthen,buttheRevenants?Anotherstory.Isbethmaynotbe
leashedtothemoonliketheAscended,butshewouldn’tdaretocomeoutduring
thedayandriskexposure.
Iglancedattheentrywayagain.
“Whereiseveryone?”Namely,wherewasmyfuckingbrother?
“Themortals—BlazandClariza?
They’reasleep.”Kieranladledasmalllake’sworthofstewintoabowl.“Good
people.DidPoppytellyouthewoman’sadescendant?”
“Shementionedit.”Itookthe
bowlandspoon,stomachrumblingattheherb-heavyscent.Thebowlfeltalittle
strangeinthefour-fingergrip,butitwassomethingI’dhavetogetusedto.
Kieranwenttothesmalltable,
takingaseat.IstoodsinceI’dspentenoughtimeonmyass.“Thedraken’s
snoopingaroundoutside,hopefullykeepinghimselfunseenandnotburninganything.”
MybrowsroseasIchewedthechunks
ofvegetablesandchicken.SomethingPoppysaidcamebacktome.“Didhereally
trytobiteyou?”
“Fuck,yeah,hetried.”Kieran’s
jawhardened.“Heisn’trealkeenonsocialskills.You’llprobablyfindhim
amusing.”
Igrinned,swallowingthethickstew.
Thegrinfaded,though,asKieranwatchedme.Ididn’twanttoaskbecauseif
theanswerwasoneIdidn’twanttohear—thatmybrotherwasn’there—I’dlose
myshit.ButIhadtoknow.“Malik?”
“Asleepinthefrontroom,
passedoutonthesettee.”
Ifeltsomething.Didn’tknowif
itwassurpriseorrelief.
Kieranleanedforward.“He
helpedyouwhenyouwereinthatcell?”
“Sawhimonce.Hegotridofthe
infection.”Iliftedtheremainingfingersonmylefthand.
“Onlyonce?”
“Hemadeitsoundlikeitwasa
risktometodoso,”Itoldhimbetweenmouthfuls
“Youbelievehim?”
“Don’tknow,”Iadmitted,my
stomachsouring.Still,Ikepteating.“You?”
Herubbedhischin.“Hesayshe
cansecureusaship.Thatwecanbesmuggledonandmakeourescapethatway.”
“Isthatso?”Iwenttothehearth,
refillingmybowlonlybecausethesoonerIwasbacktonormal,thesoonerI
couldcareforPoppy’sneeds.“Andyoutrusthimthatmuch—trusthimwith
Poppy’ssafety?”
“Thereareonlyahandfulof
peopleItrustwithhersafety,andhesureasfuckisn’toneofthem,”Kieran
replied.“Buthehelpedusgetyouout.Hehasn’ttriedtoleave,andhecould’ve
alertedtheguardswesawwhenwewerescopingoutshit.Hedidn’t.He’s
riskingalot,andheknowswhatwillhappenifhe’scaught.”
Ithoughtitover.“Idon’t
thinkhe’sgoingtobetrayus.”
Kierannodded.
“Buthe’sahugeliability,”I
said,liftingthestew-heavyspoontomymouth.
“TheHandmaiden.”
“Ifshereallyishisheartmate,
she’sleveragethatcanbeusedtocontrolhim.Probablyalreadyhasbeen.”
“OnlyifIsbethknows,”Kieran
countered.“Doyoureallythinkshe’dstillbelivingandbreathingifIsbethdid?”
“Yes.”
Hefrowned.“Whydoyouthink
that?”
“I’mabouttoblowyourmind.”I
finishedofftheremainingstew,settingthebowlbesideme.“Millicentis
Isbeth’sdaughter.HerfatherisIres.She’sPoppy’ssister.”
Kieran’slipsparted,andalong
momentpassed.“Whatintheactualfuck?”
“Yeah.”Foldinganarmovermy
stomach,Idraggedahanddownmyface.“IfIhadn’tseenMillicentwithoutthe
paintonherface,Iwouldn’tbelieveit.Butit’strue.She’sdamnnearthe
spittingimageofPoppy.”
“Thefuck?”Kieranwhispered,
straightening.
Iwould’velaughed,exceptnone
ofthiswasfunny.“Andthere’snodoubtinmymindthatMalikknowsthat.”
Kierangaveaslowshakeofhis
headashishandfelltothetablebesidethedaggers.“Butshe’saRevenant,”
hesaid,andthengavemeabriefrundownofhowandwhythethirdsonsand
daughterscouldbecomeRevenants.
Itallkindofmadesense,
consideringhowmortalshadbeencreated.
“She’ssomethinglikea
Revenant,”Isaid,sharingwhatMillicenthadtoldme.Thatdidnothingto
clearupanyconfusionbecausewhattheHandmaidenhadsaidwasaboutasclear
asthesoupinthatpot.
“Gods,”heuttered.“Haveyou
toldPoppy?”
“Ididn’twanttounloadthaton
herwhenshewassoexhausted.Onceshewakesupandfeeds…”
“Shit.”
“Yeah.”
“That’sgoingtomesswithher.”
Themusclesinmyshoulders
cramped.“Itwill.”
Heranahandoverhishead,
wherehishairhadgrownsincethelasttimeIsawhim.
“Wait.DidPoppytellyouthat
therewasmoretothatprophecy?WhatTawnytoldher?”
“Shetoldmebitsofit—fuck.
Thefirst-and-second-daughterparts?Didn’tevenconnectwhenPoppysaidit.Fated
fortheonce-promisedKing?”Ilookedtowardthehall.“IfMalikspeaksthe
truthaboutherbeinghisheartmate,itmakessense.”
“Anddoesn’tbecausePoppyisn’t
goingtoremakeanyrealms.”
Inodded.“Youknow,Millicenteven
calledherselfthefirstdaughter.Shealsoreferredtoherselfashermother’s
failure.”
“Failureatwhat?”
“Idon’tknow,butI’mthinking
it’swhatIsbethplans.”Ipushedawayfromthecounterasmoreofwhat
Millicenthadsharedwithmeclearedinmymind.“Shetoldmesheplannedto
remaketherealms.”Iwenttothewindow,pullingtheblindsbackalittleto
seethinwispsofmist-strewnnight.
Kieranturnedinhischair.
“Yeah,weheardthat.OneofthePriestsinOakAmblersaiditwasPoppy’s
purpose.”
Closingmyeyes,Iletthe
blindsfallbackintoplace.IrecalledjumbledwordsspokenbyMillicentand
theBloodQueen,someslippingpastmebeforeIcouldmakesenseofthem.
“Millicentsaidthattoremaketherealms,youhadtodestroythemfirst.AndI
thinkthat’showIsbethfailedwithMillicent.Shewould’vehadtogothrough
theCulling—Ascendintohergodhood.Idon’tthinkMillicentsurvivedit.”
“AndyouthinkIsbethmadeher
intooneofthosethingsasawaytosaveher?”Kieransoundedincredulous.
“Youthinkshecaresthatmuch?”
“IthinkshelovesPoppyinher
owntwisted,fucked-upway.Ithinkthat’swhyshealsodidn’ttouchmethis
timearound.”IfacedKieran.“AndIthinksheprobablylovesMillicentinthat
samedementedwayofhers.Afterall,thedeathofonechildpropelledallof
thisintomotion,didn’tit?”
“Shit.”Kieranlookedupatthe
exposedbeamsoftheceiling.“So,what?YouthinkMillicentwasherfirst,and
Poppywashersecondattemptatcreatingsomethingshethinkswilldestroythe
realms?”
“Yeah.”
“Poppywillneverdosomething
likethat.Never,”Kieransaidfrombetweenclenchedteethwithaswipeofhis
hand.Gods,Icouldn’tlovethewolvenmore.HisloyaltytoourQueenwas
everything.“Yeah,she’shadhermoments—onesyouhaven’tseen,where
she’s…she’ssomethingelse.LikewhenshesawwhatIsbethhaddonetoyou.”
Ihadtobreathethroughtherage.
Ihadtoresistpickinguponeofthedaggersandslammingitintothewallof
amortal’shome.Oneswho’ddonenothingbutaidus.Ihadtogetoverthe
guilt.
“Butit’sstillPoppy,”Kieran
said,andshadowscreptacrosshisface,quicklydisappearing.“Isbethmayhave
succeededincreatingapowerfulgod,butsheultimatelyfailed.”
“Agreed.”Iwenttothetable,
mymovementsstiff.“There’smore.Iknowthereis.Butmyhead,man…it’sgot
thesepatchesofnothing.They’reslowtofillout.”Placingmyhandsonthe
table,Ileanedover.“IknowMillicentsaidthatIneededtostopPoppy.That,
soon,Iwouldbetheonlyone.”
“Stopherasin…?”Kieran
stiffened,andthechangethatsweptthroughhimwasvastandquick.Hisskin
thinned.Hiseyesturnedluminous.“Killher?”
“Notgoingtohappen,”Ireminded
him.
“Damnstraight,it’snot,”he
growled.“BecauseI’mgoingtogoroundupReaverandlethimburnthatwannabe
Revenant.”
“YoureallythinkPoppywill
allowthatoncesheknowswhoMillicentis?”Iasked,andKieransnarledlow.
“Idon’tthinkMillicentwantsPoppydead.It’salmostlikeshebelievesthere’s
nootherway.”
“BecauseshethinksPoppy’sthe
Harbinger?”
Inodded.
“She’snot.AndIdon’tgivea
fuckaboutthedifferencesbetweenwantingPoppydeadandthinkingthere’sno
otherway,”hefiredback.“Youtellingmethereisone?”
Mystaremethis.“Youknowdamn
wellifsheprovestobeathreattoPoppy,Iwillhand-deliverhertoReaver.
I’dratherhavePoppy’shatethanseeherharmed.”
Kieransatback,hisfingers
tenseonthetable.“Poppywillneverhateyou.”
Isnorted.“Youunderestimate
hercapacityforfeelingstrongemotions.”
“Actually,Idon’t.”Hiseyes
flickedtomine.“TheonlythingthatdroveherclosetodestroyingSoliswas
herloveforyou.”
Love.
Isbeth’stauntingwordsresurfaced
fromthedarkness.Ineverwantedthatweakness.
Istraightened.
Lovecanbeweaponized,
weakeninga…
Myheartstartedpounding.
“What?”Kierandemanded.“What
isit?”
“Poppytoldmethedrakensaid
shehadn’tcompletedtheCullingyet,”Irasped.Millicenthadsaidthesame.
ItwaswhyIsbethhaddoneallshehad.Whyshe’dtakenmeinthefirstplace.
Whyshewaited.
“Yeah.So?”
“Agodisn’tpowerfulenoughto
destroytherealms,Kieran.Isbethwouldknowthat.”
Andagodwasn’tpowerfulenough
todoasMillicentclaimed,either,tohandIsbethherrevengeagainstNyktos.
Kieranopenedhismouth,but
thenhisgazecuttotheshieldedwindow.Hiseyeswidened,andIknewthat
he’drealizedthesamethingIhad.Itwasimpossible,but…
Kieran’sheadswiveledbackto
me.“Themist.Shedidn’tsummonit,Cas.ShecreatedthePrimalmist.”
Hourslater,asthesuncrestedoverthecity,Isatin
bedbesidePoppy,anklescrossedandbackagainsttheheadboard.Shehadn’t
wokenwhenIjoinedher,butshehadsnuggledclose,restinghercheek
againstmychest.
Ihadn’tsleptmorethanan
hour—ifthat.Fortotallydifferentreasonsnow.Isatthere,toyingwiththe
softstrandsofPoppy’shairassheslept.Simplystunnedbyher.Marveled.
Thedoorcrackedopen,and
Kieranentered.Hisstepswerequiet,carefulasheapproachedthebed.“Ihate
todothis…”
“Iknow,”Isaid,lookingdown
atPoppy.Hedidn’twanttowakeher.NeitherdidI,butitwasnecessary.Time
wasn’tonourside.
Tuckingstrandsbackfromher
cheek,Ibentoverandkissedherbrow.“Queen,”Icalledsoftly,smoothingmy
thumbalongherlowerjaw.Poppy’sbrowspinchedasshewiggledcloser.I
grinnedasKieransatonherotherside.“Openthosebeautifuleyesforme.”
Herlashesflutteredandthen
sweptup.Sleepclungtohergaze.Thosegrayshadowsunderhereyeswerestill
there,butthesilverstreakswerebright,piercingthespringgreen.“Cas.”
Agroanrumbledfrommychest.
“You’remyfavoritekindoftorture,”Itoldher,kissingherbrow.“Kieran’s
here.”
Sheturnedherheadslightly,
lookingoverhershoulder.“Hi.”
Kieransmiledatherashe
leanedoverherhip,bracinghisweightwithhishandonthebed.Hisfeatures
softenedinawayIhadn’tseenfromhiminalongtime.“Morning.”
“Morning?”sherepeated,blinking.
“Isleptthatlong?”
“It’sokay.Youneededtherest,
andwecouldn’tleaveanyway,”Itoldher,squeezinghershoulder.
“Didyourest?”Sheglancedback
atKieran.“Dideitherofyoutworest?”
“Ofcourse,”Kieranliedso
smoothly,Ialmostbelievedhim.
PoppywatchedKieranforamoment
andthenlookedupatme.“Howareyoufeeling?”
“Divine,”Itoldher,rubbingmy
thumbalongthecurveofhercollarbone.
Shestudiedmecloselyandthen
satup,thethinblanketpoolingatherhips,andtheriotofwavesandcurls
goingineverydirection.“IsMalikstillhere?”
Iignoredthesuddenlurchinmy
chestasIcurledanarmaroundherwaist,figuringshewasmeresecondsfromclimbing
outofbed.“Heis.”
“Justsawhim.”Kieran’sgaze
flickedtome.“Stillsleeping.”
“AndReaver?”sheaskedasIpulled
herbetweenmylegssoshewaspressedtomychest.Sheallowedit,relaxing
intomeinawaythatalmostmadeithardtobelieveshe’dusedtositso
stifflynearme.“Ishe—?”
“He’sfine,”Kieransaid.
“Hasn’tburnedanyonealive.”Hepaused.“Recently.”
Iarchedabrow.
“Reaver,”Poppymurmuredwitha
sigh,restingahandonmyarm,“hasthisobsessionwithburningpeople.Guess
it’sadrakenthing.”
“Ithinkit’sjustaReaver
thing,”Kieranstateddryly.
“True.”Asmallgrinappearedas
sheliftedmylefthandtohermouth,pressingakisstothetop.“Whatabout
themist?DidanyCravengetintothecity?Howwillwe—?”
“Somanyquestions—”Kieran
laughedashereachedover,tuckingthatparticularlyrebelliousstrandofhair
backfromherface,theonethatkeptslippingforward.“Thatneedtowait.”
Hereyesnarrowedonhim.“I
don’tthinkanyofthemneedtowait.”
“Theydo,”Isaid,andthat
glareflippedtome.Ismiled.
“Don’tsmileatme,”shesnapped.
Mysmilegrew.“Sofeisty.”
Herstarewarmedevenasher
chinjutted.“Stupiddimples,”shemuttered.
Laughing,Iloweredmymouthto
hers,kissingher.“Youlovemydimples,”Itoldher,straightening.“Andyou
needtofeed.”
Sheopenedhermouth,then
closedit.
“Ivolunteeredwithoutevenbeing
asked,”Kieranassuredher.“Withalltheeatheryou’veused,andtheblood
you’vegivenCas,it’sanecessity.”
Poppywasquietforamoment.“I
know,butI…”
Curlingmyfingersunderher
chin,Itippedhergazebacktomine.“Yourhesitationcan’tbebecauseofme.”
“It’snot.”Sheturnedherhead
down,kissingthetipofmyfinger.HereyesfixedonKieran.“It’sjustthatI
don’tlikeusingyouasa—asasnack.”
Hisbrowsflewup.“Well,first
off,Idon’tliketothinkofmyselfasasnack.Morelikeawholedamnmeal.”
Droppingmyfacetothetopof
Poppy’shead,ittookeverythinginmenottolaugh.
“Okay,Mr.WholeDamnMeal,I
don’tlikeusingyouingeneral,andyouknowthat.”Movingsuddenly,she
shovedherelbowintomystomach,causingmetogrunt.“Andyou?It’snot
funny.”
“Ofcourse,not,myQueen,”I
replied,grinningintoherhair.
Shemovedtojabmewithher
elbowagain,butIcurledmyotherarmaroundher,stoppingherasIlaughed.Tilting
myhead,Ikissedhercheek.“You’renotusinghim.It’samutuallybeneficial
act.”
Poppytwistedhernecktolook
atme.“Howisthatamutuallybeneficialact?”
Kieranopenedhismouthandthen
wiselycloseditwhenhisgazemetmine.“Because,”Isaid,looseningmyhold
onher,“itmakeshimfeeluseful.”
Sherolledhereyes.
“Poppy.”Kieranleanedforward,
placinghisfingersunderherchinandturningherattentiontohim.“Youknow
I’mhappytobeofaidtoyouinthisway.You’renotusingme.You’reallowing
metohelpyou.There’saworldofdifferencebetweenthosetwothings.”
Quietly,shestaredathim,and
Ihadafeelingshewasreadinghim.Whatevershefelt,I’dhavetothank
Kieranforlater,becauseshenoddedwithasigh.“Okay.”
Aboltofreliefshotthrough
me.Igaveheranotherquickkissonthecornerofherlipsandthenlifteda
hand.Ididn’tneedtosayanything.Kieranofferedhis,andPoppytensedagainst
measIloweredmymouthtohiswrist.Hergripreturnedtomyarmasshe
turned,givingmeroom.IhesitatedoverKieran’sskin,raisingmyeyesto
hers.TinynailsdugintothefleshofmyarmasshewatchedmepierceKieran’s
skin.Anearthytastetouchedmytongue.Ididn’tdrink,andIdidn’tgotoo
deeply.Kierandidn’tevenmove,butPoppy’sworriedgazeshottothewolven.
“I’mfine,”heassured.
Liftingmyhead,myhandwas
stillaroundKieran’swhenhebroughtthewellingbloodtohermouth.Therewas
amomentwhenPoppydidn’tmove,butthensheloweredherhead,closingher
moutharoundthemarks.
Kieranmovedthen.
Justasmalljerk.OneIdidn’t
thinkPoppynoticedasIgatheredthestrandsofherhairthathadfallenforward,
brushingthemoveroneshoulder.
MyhandleftKieran’sthen,and
Icurledmyarmaroundherwaist,restingmyhandononehip.Shegavealittle
joltatthetouchandthenherlegcurledundertheblanket,pressingagainst
mineasIdrewmyotherhandupanddownherback.
Iwatchedher—thethickfringe
oflashesfanninghercheeks,thewayherthroatworkedoneachswallowasI
movedmyfingersacrossherhipinslow,steadycircles.Ididn’ttakemyeyes
offher.Isawthemomenttheshadowsunderhereyescleared.Iinhaled,
breathinginafamiliarscent.ThecornersofmylipstippedupasIbent,kissing
thetopofherheadandthenhertemple.
Thosesharp,littlenailsdug
intomyfleshasapinkflushseepedacrosshercheeks.Hereyesflewopen,
narrowingonKieran.Thebastardwasgrinning,lookingwaytooproudof
himself,andIhadafeelingshehadstumbledintohismemories,andhewas
showinghersomethingshelikelyfoundhighlyinappropriate.
Andintriguing.
Becausethatscentincreased,
joininganother,andmybloodthickenedinresponse.Poppygavearestless
wiggle,causingherhiptobrushagainstmyentirelyintriguedcock.Isqueezed
herhip,pullinghertightertome.
Poppyswallowedonelasttime
andthenliftedhermouth.“Thankyou,”shewhispered,foldingbothherhands
aroundKieran’sforearm,justbelowmybite.Asilveryglowradiatedfromher
hands,anditdidn’tmatterhowmanytimesIsawherdothis.Itwasfucking
awe-inspiring.Thetwopuncturewoundsfadedwithinafewheartbeats.Shelet
goofhisarm.“You’restillajerk,though.”
Kieran’slaughcrinkledtheskin
atthecornersofhiseyes.“Youtakeenough?”
Poppyreclinedagainstmychest.
“Yes.”
“Good.”Helookedatmewith
brighteyes—eyesthatpulsedwitheatherbehindthepupils—asheclaspedthe
backofPoppy’sheadandbent,kissingherforehead.Herosefromthebed.
“I’llbewaiting.”
Themomentthedoorclosedbehind
Kieran,Iclaspedhercheeksandturnedhergazetome.Thepinkflushinher
skinhaddeepened.
“MyQueen?”
Thetipofhertonguewetherlips.
“Yes?”
“Ineedyouonmycock.”Dipping
myhead,mytonguetracedtheflickofhers.“Now.”
Poppyshuddered.
Islidmyhandsdownhersides,
liftingherhipsanddrawingherontoherknees.Hermouthfoundmine,andher
kiss—fuck,ittastedofsweetnessandsomethingwarm.Earthy.Herhandswentto
myshoulders,tothehaironthenapeofmyneck.Wehadalotofimportant
shittotalkaboutandgetdone,butIneededthesameasshedid.Tobeinside
her.Ireachedforthebuttonsonmybreeches,barelymanagingtounhookthem
withoutrippingthemoff.IgrippedmyselfasIcurledmyarmaroundherwaist,
pullingherdown.
Thefirsttouchofher,hotand
slick,nearlyundidme.AsdidthebreathysoundshemadeagainstmylipsasI
drewherdownuntilnospaceremainedbetweenus.Nothing.Ithreadedmyfingers
throughherhairasIslidmyhandunderthehemofhershirt,cuppingherass.
“AsIsaidbefore…”Irockedher
againstme.“You’remyfavoritekindoftorture.”
Shemoaned,trembling.“You’rejust
myfavorite.”HerbreathcaughtasIsqueezedherass,grindingherdownonmy
dick.“You’remyfavoriteeverything.”
Inippedatherlowerlip.“I
know.”
“Arrogant.”
“Justtellingthetruth.”Itook
hermouthwithmine,drawingintheuniqueflavorofherkiss.“Icantastehis
bloodonyourtongue.”
Herhipsgaveadeliciouslittle
jerk,butshestartedtopullback.Istoppedher.“It’snotabadthing,”I
toldher,keepingherhipsmoving,working.“Whatdoeshisbloodtasteliketo
you?”
“Youdidn’t…tasteit?”Herwords
cameoutinshortpants.
“Tastedearthytome.”
“It…hisbloodtasteslikeafall
morning,”shesaid.
“I’malittleenviousofthat.”
Islidmyhandoverthesoftfleshofherass,slippingafingerbetweenthe
cheeksandintothetightfleshthere.Herentirebodystiffenedasshesucked
inasharpbreath.“Doesthathurt?”
“No,”shewhispered,herchest
risingandfallingrapidlyagainstmine.“Itjustfeelsdifferent.”
“Butgood?”Iwatchedherclosely,
searchingforanyhintofdiscomfortasIremainedstillbeneathher.
Poppybitdownonherlip.
“Yes.”
Ismiledatherandthenstarted
movingherhipsagain.“YoureadaboutsomethinglikethisinMissWilla’sdiary?”
Herfacewasevenpinker.“Maybe.”
Ichuckledroughly,takingthe
lipshe’dbittenwithmine.Thehandsatmyshoulderstrembled.“Wereyou
curiousaboutitwhenyoureadit?Ibetyouwere.”
“Maybealittle,”shesaid.
“Gods.”Inippedherneck,avoiding
thenearlyhealedbitemarks.“Ilovethatfuckingbook.”
“Notsurprisedtohearthat…”
Shejerked,andshefelthotter,wetter.“Ididn’tthinkitwouldfeelso—”Her
moanwasafull-bodyshudderasIpressedindeeper.“Ididn’tthinkitwould
feellike…”
“Likewhat?”
“Likethis.”Herforeheadfell
againstmine.“Hot.Wicked.Full.”
Herbreathwasonaloop,
catchingandreleasing,andIdidn’tthinksherealizedthatIwasn’tguiding
hermovementsanylonger.Sherodeme,herbreathhotagainstmylipsandherbody
movinginsinuouscurlsandplunges.Sheenjoyedthewickedness.Thoroughly.I
hearditinthoseinhales.Feltitinhowshetightenedaroundmydickandmy
finger.Whenshecame,shetookmeovertheedgerightwithher.Thereleaseshook
usboth,leavingmefeelingasifI’dlostcontrolofallthemusclesinmybody.
Ittookalotofwillpowerto
easemyselfoutofherandleaveheronthebed,curledonhersideoncemore,
lookingthoroughlyfuckedinamostindecentway.Ididn’tlingerlonginthe
bathingchamber,cleaningupquicklybeforereturningtoher,sittingnearher
hip.
Poppywasawake,thoughhereyes
wereonlyhalfopen.TherewaspeaceinhersoftsmilethatIhatedtodisturb.
ButIhadto.
Shewasrested,fed,andfucked.
AllIcouldhopewasthatthose
threethingswouldhelpherprocesswhatIhadtotellher
“ThereissomethingIneedtotalk
toyouabout.It’sgoingtobehardtobelieve,andit’llbeashock.”
ThechangeinPoppywas
immediate.Thesmilevanished,andshe’dgonecompletelystillasshestaredup
atme.“What?”
IdrewinadeepbreathasI
tuggedthehemofhershirtdown.“TheHandmaidenthatyouthinkmybrotheris
inlovewith?Theoneheclaimsishisheartmate?”
Herbrowssnappedtogether.
“Millicent?”
“Yeah.Her.”Iswallowed.“She
cametomycellafewtimes.IknowshetoldMalikthewoundinmyhandwas
infected.Andthenshecameagain,afterIsawyou.Sheshowedmesomething.
That’showIknowthatwhatshetoldmeistrue.Isawit.There’snodenying
it.She’s…she’syoursister,Poppy.Yourfull-bloodedsister.”
Chapter34
Poppy
“Mysister?”TherewasnowayIcould’veheardhim
right.Isatupasifthatwouldsomehowchangewhathe’dsaid.“Shecan’tbe
mysister,Casteel.”
Awarmvanillatastegatheredin
mythroatashesmoothedhisthumbjustunderthescaronmyleftcheek.“She
is,Poppy.”
Therewaslikesomesortof
barrierthatflat-outrepelledthewholeidea.“Andyouthinkthis,allbecause
shetoldyouso?”
“Becausesheshowed
me,”hesaidgently.“Haveyouseenherwithoutthatmaskpaintedonherface?”
Ifrowned.“No.”
“Ihave.”Hetrailedhisthumb
alongthecurveofmyjaw.“I’veseenwhatshelookslikeaftershe’swashed
awaythepaintanddye.”
“Wait.Wasshebathing
infrontofyou?”
“Sortof.”Onesideofhislips
curvedup,andtherewasahintofadimpleinhisrightcheek.“She,with
littlewarning,straight-updunkedherheadinthebaththathadbeenbrought
intomycell.”
Thatsoundedlikeanoddthing
todo.
ButthenIrememberedhowshe’d
climbedintothatchairandlayupsidedownfornoreasonwhatsoever.
“Herhairisn’tblack,”hecontinued,
andIthoughtabouttheflatnessofherhaircolor,howithadlookedpatchyin
someareas.“It’saverypaleblond,nearlywhite.”
Ijerkedbackasanimagetook
hold—oneofthewomanI’dseeninthosestrangedreamsormemories.TheoneI’d
believedtobetheConsort.Shehadhairsopaleitremindedmeofmoonlight.
Myheartstartedpounding.
“Andherface?”Casteelleaned
in,slidinghishandtothenapeofmyneck.“Shehasyoureyes,exceptthe
colorisdifferent.Hernose.Thestructureofherfeatures.Eventhetiltof
herjaw.”Hisgazesearchedmine.“Shehaswaymorefrecklesthanyoudo,but
shecouldalmostpassforyourtwin,Poppy.”
Iwasstaringathimagain,
caughtinastormofdisbelief.Almostpassasmytwin?Ifthatwere
true,howcouldInothaveseenit?Butthemask—thefacialpaint—was
thickandlarge,makingitdifficulttoeventellwhatherbonestructurewas
like.
Buthecouldn’tberight.Somehow,
he’dbeenmisled.Tricked.
Leaningback,Ishookmyhead.
“Thisdoesn’tmakeanysense.Revenantsarethethirdsonsanddaughters.And
ifsheweremysister,thenthatmeansIhavetwomoresiblings.And
shewouldbeagoddess.”
“Ithoughtthesamethingat
first—thatshehadtobeagoddess.Butshesaidshewasn’t.TheonlythingI
canfigureisthatshedidn’tsurvivetheCulling,andIsbethusedher
knowledgeoftheRevenantstosaveher,”hetoldme.
Araggedlaughleftme,and
Casteel’sconcerngatheredinmythroat,richandthicklikecream.“Shecan’t—if
she’smysister…”Itrailedoff,throatcloggingasIrememberedher
desperation—thehopelessnessthatfeltalotlikewhatI’dsensedfromIresasa
child.Iswallowedhard.“ShesaidshesawmewhenIwasachild.Ifwhatshesays
istrue,whywouldn’tshehavesaidsomething?”
“Maybeshecouldn’t.Idon’t
know.”Casteelbrushedafewstrandsofmyhairback.“Butsheisyoursister.”
Couldthisreallybetrue?Had
Ianknown?Irememberedhershockwhenhewaskilled.Hersorrow.There’dbeen
nootherchildreninthatcastleotherthanIanandmewhenwewereyounger,
butshehadalsosaidthatshewasnearlyasoldasCasteel.
Asister?
Goodgods,itjustcouldn’tbe
true—
WhatIsbethhadsaidcameback
tome.Hewasangry,butwhenwecametogethertomakeyou,hewasnot
forced.Neithertime.
Neithertime.
Ihadn’tpaidattentiontothose
wordsthen.OrmaybeI’djustassumedshe’dmeantthey’donlybeentogethertwice
“IfsheisIsbeth’sdaughter,
thenhowissheokaywithherfatherbeingcaged?”Iasked,myheartstill
racing.IknewCasdidn’thavetheanswertothat,butIcouldn’tstopmyself.
“ShehastoknowIsbethhashimsomewhere.Doesshenotcare?Isshejustlike
hermother?”
“Idon’tthinkshe’slikeIsbeth.
Ifshehadn’tgonetoMalik—”
“Malik.”Iscrambled
offthebed,turningtolookformyclothing.“Malikwouldknow.”
“Possibly.”Casteelstood,
findingmyshirthalfwayunderthebed.Heseemedabouttospeakagainbutfell
silentashedonnedablacklinenshirtthatshouldn’thavebeenaslooseon
himasitwas.Ihadtostopmyworryfromgrowingintosomethingbigger.He
wouldregaintheweighthe’dlost,alongwithhisstrength—fasterthanIevenprobably
expected.
Thepantsleftformeweredefinitely
breeches.Theyfit,ifabitsnugly,butIreallydidn’twanttowalkabout
pantsless,soIwasn’tcomplaining.Someonehadalsoloanedmeavest,onethat
hadsevenhundredtinyhooksrunningupthefront.Islippeditonoverthe
shirtandstartedthetediousworkofhookingtheclaspswithoutmissingone.
“Letmehelp.”Casteelcameto
me,hishandsreplacingmytremblingfingers.Ittookhimamomenttogetused
tonotbeingabletousehispointerfingeronhislefthand,buthemanaged
farmorequicklythanI.
Theintimacyofhisaidhada
quietingeffectonmymind.MythoughtsstilledasIwatchedhimworkthetiny
claspsintothehooks.Thereweren’tsevenhundredofthem.Possiblythirty.I
wishedthereweresevenhundred.Becausethismomentfeltsonormal,despite
everything.Somethingcouplesmightdoeveryday.
SomethingI’dmissed
desperately.
Thebacksofhisfingersbrushed
theswellofmybreastashefinishedthelastcoupleofclasps.“HaveItoldyou
howmuchIlovethisparticularitemofclothingonyou?”
“Ibelieveyouhave.”Istraightened
thehemwhereitfitandflaredslightlyovermyhips.“AnytimeIworea
garmentlikethis,Ithoughtabouthowmuchyoulikedit.”
Thatdimpleappearedagain,and
Ididn’tthinkitwassostupidthen.Hetrailedafingeralongthecurved-edge
bodiceofthevest.Atinystripoflacehadbeenstitchedthere,thesamedeep
shadeofgrayasthevest.“IthinkIwouldloveitevenmorewithouttheshirt.”
“Ibetyouwould,”Ireplied
wryly.Mybreastsandstomachwerealreadytestingthelimitsoftheclasps,
doingverylittletohidethedeepcleavagepeekingthroughtheV-shaped
necklineoftheshirt.Withouttheshirt,theentirekingdomwouldgetquite
theeyeful.
Hisotherdimplemadeanappearance
ashegatheredthesleevethathadcomeundoneandbeganrollingit.“Iknow
thatwhatIjusttoldyouisahugeshock,andit’sonlyoneofmanyinrecent
months,”hesaid,foldingthesleevearoundmyelbow.“Iknowit’sgoingto
messwithyourheadonceyouacceptitastruth.”
Itwasalreadymessingwithmy
head.
“Andthat’snotsomethingyou
needrightnow.”Hemovedontotheothersleeve,givingitthesametreatment.
“ButIcouldn’tkeepthatfromyou.”
Ilookedupathim.Dark,glossy
waveshadfallenoverhisforehead,nearlyintohiseyes.Thesmoothjawline
wasfamiliar,andthehollownessunderhischeeksalreadylessnoticeable.For
forty-fivedays,I’ddreamedofstandingbeforehim.I’dwantednothingmorethan
that,andhewashere.
Oncehewasfinishedwiththe
sleeve,Istretchedupandkissedhimsoftly.Thestrikinglinesofhisface
softenedundermypalm.“Idon’tknowwhattoeventhinkorwhattobelieve,
buttellingmewastherightthing.Iwould’vedonethesameifyouhada
randombrotherorsisteroutthere,roamingabout.”
Hegrinned.“Idon’tthinkmy
familialancestryisnearlyasinterestingasyours.”
IshothimanarchlookasI
stoppedtopickupthesheatheddaggerandstrapittomythigh.
Casteelwaitedatthedoor,his
eyesaheatedgoldashewatchedme.Slowly,hisgazeliftedtomine.“Istill
findthatdaggersheathedtoyourthighwildlyarousing.”
Ismiled,joininghim.“Istill
findthattobeslightlydisturbing.”
“Onlyslightly?Iseemy
dysfunctionisrubbingoffonyou.”
“That’sbecauseyou’reabad
influence.”
“Toldyouoncebefore,myQueen.”
Hetouchedhisthumbtomychinandthenmovedthehandtomylowerbackashe
openedthedoor,causingmyhearttoflutterabout.Gods,howI’dmissedthese
littletouches.“Onlythealreadyenticinglywickedcanbeinfluenced.”
IlaughedasIsteppedoutinto
acoffee-scentedhallandimmediatelycameface-to-facewithKieran.
He’dbeenleaningagainstthe
wallandstraighteneduponseeingus.“Ihaven’tbeenoutherelong,”hesaid,
hispalegazeflickeringoverbothofus.“Iwasjustcomingtotellyouguys
thatyouneededtostopmakingoutforfiveseconds.”
“Liar,”Casteelmurmuredwithagrin.
“You’veprobablybeenoutherethewholetime.”
Kierandidn’trespond,and
Casteelwenttohimasmysensesopened,stretchingouttothewolven.Theheaviness
ofworryhadreplacedtheteasingamusementfromwhenIhadfedfromhim.He
wasstillconcernedaboutCasteel,butIdidn’tthinkthatwastheonlyreason
he’dlingeredoutsidethechamber.Ithoughtthatperhapshejustneededtobe
nearCasteel.
AndIalsothoughtthatCasteel
possiblysensedthatsomehowbecausewhenhewenttoKieran,hepulledhiminto
atightembrace.
Seeingthetwoofthemtogether,
holdingeachothersotightly,broughtawealthofwarmthtome.Therewasno
bondbetweenCasteelandKieran—I’dbrokenthatwhenIAscendedintomygodhood.
Butthelovetheyfeltforeachotherwentbeyondanytypeofbond.Still,
therewasalsoabitofsorrowbecauseIdoubtedthatCasteelhadsharedanyof
thosegestureswithhisbrother.
Nothingwassaid,butasalways,
thereseemedtobesomekindofsilentcommunicationbetweenthem,onethat
must’vecomefromknowingoneanotherforsolong.
Casteelextendedhisarmtome.
Icameforward,placingmyhandinhis.Hetuggedmeintohisside,anda
heartbeatlater,Kieran’sotherhandfistedinmyhair.Theairshudderedfrom
measIsqueezedmyeyestightagainsttherushoftears—therushof…sweet
emotion.Thesimplegesturewasapowerfulreminderthatthismomentwasn’t
justaboutthem.Itwasaboutus.
Ibreatheddeeply,feelingasif
itwerethefirstrealbreathI’dtakeninweeks.MyeyesclosedasCasteel’s
andKieran’swarmthsurroundedmeandreachedinside.Tothecoldplaceinthe
centerofmybeingthatIforcedmyselfnottothinkabout.Ithadheatedin
thosemomentswhenitwasjustCasteelandmeandnothingbetweenourbodies.
Nothinginmymindbutthefeelofhisskinagainstmine.Thechillyemptiness
hadreturnedwhileIbathedhim,though.AbatedforonlyalittlebitwhenI
fedandwhathadcomeafter.ButithadreturnedasI’ddressed.
Butnowtherewasonlywarmthas
Istoodbetweenthem.
Kieranshifted,pressinghis
foreheadtomine.“Notfeelingtiredoranything?”heasked,hisvoicelow.
“Youthinkyougotenoughblood?”
Inodded,steppingback,butI
didn’tmakeitveryfar.Casteel’sarmhadtightenedaroundmywaist.“Ineed
tospeakwithMalik.”
Casteelglanceddownatme.“I
toldKieranwhileyouweresleeping.”
“Doyoubelieveit?”Iasked
him.
“Ididn’tatfirst,butIdon’t
seewhyshe’dlieorhowshecouldlooksomuchlikeyou.”Kieranturned.
“Malik’sinthekitchen.”
“Stillsurprisedhe’shere,”
Casteelsaid,andItensedatthewarinessinhistone.
Kierannodded.“Icanunderstand
that.”
Casteel’shandreturnedtothe
centerofmybackandremainedthereaswefollowedKierandownthehalltothe
areaofthekitchen.I’donlytakenafewstepsbeforeonewordenteredmy
thoughts.
Sister
Iexhaledroughlyaswepassedthrough
aroundedopening.Thechamberwaswelllit,buttheshadeshadbeendrawnon
thewindowsliningthewall,blockingoutthemorningsun.BlazandClariza
wereatawell-worntable,thesurfacedullandfullofmanynicksofvarious
sizes.Marksthatmusthavecomefromthevariousdaggersandbladeslaidout
uponit.
Maliksatwiththem,staringat
thecupofcoffeebetweenhishands.Hedidn’tlookupasweentered,buthis
shoulderstensedinthesamewayCasteel’sdidbesideme.Therewasnowarm,
long-overdueembrace.Therewasnoacknowledgment.
Chairsscrapedagainstwoodas
BlazandClarizarose,andIsuspectedtheywereabouttokneel.“Notnecessary.”
Thetwoexchangedglances.Blaz
gavemeatoothygrinashesat.
“Thankyouforopeningyourhome
tous.”Casteeladdressedthemashishandmovedupanddownmyback.“Iknow
thatthiswasofgreatrisktoyouboth.”
“It’sourhonorandworthwhatever
risk,”Clarizasaid,hereyeswideassheclaspedherhandstogether.“Youlook
muchbetter.”
Casteelinclinedhishead.“I
feelmuchbetter.”
“Wouldyoulikeacupofcoffee,
YourMajesty?”Blazasked.
“Coffeewouldbenice.”Casteel
glancedatme,andInodded.“Andyoudon’thavetouseanytitle.Wearenot
yourrulers.”
Clarizagaveasmallsmileas
sherose.“I’llgetyoutwosomecoffee.Blaztendstomakeitmorecreamand
sugarthanactualcoffee.”
“Iseenothingwrongwiththat,”
themortalreplied,leaningback.
NeitherdidIasClarizahurried
tothehearth.Therewasalotweneededtobeupdatedon,butMalikremained
atthetable,hisheadbowedandbodyrigid.IglancedatCasteel.Heeyed
Malik.Hadbeensinceweenteredthekitchen.Ilookedaround,mybrows
knitting.“Where’sReaver?”
“Cleaningup,”Malikanswered,
takingasipofcoffee.
“Finally,”Kieranmuttered,and
Casteellookedathim.
Iopenedmymouthandclosedit,
butthenMalikfinallyliftedhisgaze.Thequestionburstoutofme.“IsMillicent
mysister?”
Severalsetsofeyeslandedon
measthemortals’lemonycuriositygatheredinmythroat,butMalik…Hiseyes
narrowedashesatstraight.“Blaz?Riza?Ihatetoask,butcanwehavea
moment?”
Blazrolledhiseyes.“Idon’t
know.Iwouldliketoknowtheanswertothisquestion.I’dalsoliketoknow
whoMillicentis.”
“Ibetyouwould,”Malikreplied
acidly.
Clarizacametous,twocupsin
hand.“Therearealsosomebiscuitsifyou’rehungry,”shesaidasItookoneof
thecream-coloredmugs.“BlazandIwillcheckonReaver.”
“Thankyou,”Iwhispered.
Herstareheldminefora
moment,andthenshenodded.Sheturnedtoherhusband.“Up.”
“Really?”Blazexclaimed.“You
knowhownosyIam,andyou’reaskingmetoleave?”
“Really.”Shepinnedhimwitha
sternlookthatwasratherimpressiveasItookadeepdrinkofthehot,rich
coffee.
Blazsighed,grumblingashegot
tohisfeet.“I’mgoingtoeavesdrop,justsoyouknow.”
“No,hewon’t.”Clarizathreaded
herarmthroughhis.“He’lljustbitchandmoaninourbedchamber.”
“Couldjustbemoaninginstead
ofbitching,youknow?”Blazrespondedwithawaggleofhisbrows.
“Youkeeptalking,”shesaidas
theywalkedfromthekitchen,“andthatbecomesevenmoreunlikely.”
Casteel’slipstwitchedaround
therimofhismug.“Ilikethem,”hesaidastheydisappeareddownthehall.
“They’regoodpeople,”Malik
said,staringupatme.“DidMillicenttellyouthis?”
“Shetoldme,”Casteelanswered.
“Andshowedme.”
“Youdon’tbelievehim?”Malik
askedofme.
“Ibelievethat’swhathewas
told,butIdon’tseehowit’spossible,”Isaid.“Evenifshelookslikeme—”
“Shedoes,”Malikinterrupted,
andmystomachdipped.Amuscletickedinhistemple.“It’seeriehowmuchyou
twolookalike.”
“Notjustlooks,”Casteel
commented,thathandstillmovingupanddownmyback—soothing,grounding.
“Personality,too.”
Myheadswungtohim.“Excuse
me?Wereallyaretalkingaboutthesameperson,right?”IglancedatKieran.“The
onewhoflounced—literallyflounced—outofthechamberandsatupsidedown
inachairfornoreasonatall?”
“Therearesimilarmannerisms.
Thewaybothofyou…move,”Casteelsaid,andIfeltthefrownpermanently
etchingontomyfacebecauseIdidn’tflounceanywhere.“Shealsohas
atendencyto…”
“Ramble?”Malikfinishedfor
him,ahalf-grinappearing.
Myeyesnarrowed.“Idonot
ramble.”
Casteelcoughedonhisdrinkas
Kieransilentlyhoistedhimselfontothecounter,hisbrowslifted.
“Idonot,”Iinsisted.
“Yes,youdo,”Reaversaid,
enteringthekitchen.HeglancedatCasteel.“Reaver.Nicetomeetyou.Glad
youdidn’tbiteme,andIdidn’thavetoburnyoualive.”
Ihadnothingtosaytothat.
“Nicetomeetyou,too,”Casteel
drawled,eyesglimmeringwithahintofbewilderedamusementashestaredat
thedraken.“Thankyouforyouraid.”
“Whatever.”Reaverstrolledpast
us,headingforthecoveredplatenearthehearth.
“Anyway,”Isaid,focusingon
MalikwhileCasteelwatchedReaver.Irealizedthiswasprobablythefirsttime
he’dgottentoseeadrakenwhilehere.“Ifshe’smysister,howis
sheaRevenantandnotagoddess?IsitwhatCasteelsuspects?Didshehave
problemsAscending?”
Maliksaidnothing.
Casteel’shandstilledonmyback
asReavershovedhalfabiscuitintohismouth.“Brother,ifIwereyou,Iwould
startsharingwhateveritisyouknow.”
“Orwhat?”Malikinclinedhis
headinanactthatwassoshockinglysimilartoCasteel’s,Ithoughtmaybe
therereallywassomethingaboutsiblingmannerisms.“You’regoingtomakeme?”
Casteel’slaughwasdry.“I
don’tthinkyouhavetoworryaboutmemakingyoudoshit.”
“True,”Malikmurmured,smirking
ashisgazeflickedtome.Amomentpassed.“Casisright.Millie…shewould’ve
beenagodifshe’dsurvivedtheCulling.Shedidn’t.”
“Waitasecond,”Reaversaid,
wipingcrumbsfromhismouthwiththebackofhishand.“ThatHandmaidenisPoppy’s
sister?”
Kieransighed.“Wherehaveyou
been?”
“Notinthekitchen,”Reaver
snapped.“Obviously.”
Thewolvenrolledhiseyes.
ReaverfocusedonMalik.“Ires
isthefather?”WhenMaliknodded,thedraken’sbrowsflewup.“Oh,shit.She’s
goingtobe…”Heshookhishead,takinganotherbite.“Ifthatistrue,the
Handmaidenwould’veneededblood—”
“Shehasaname,”Malik
interrupted,histoneflat.“It’sMillicent.”
Reavercockedhisheadtotheside,
andforamoment,Ifearedtheremightbefire.“Millicentwould’ve
neededpowerfulbloodtocompletetheAscensionintogodhood.Meaning,she
would’veneededthebloodofagod.Oradescendantofthegods.”Hegestured
atMalik.“AnAtlantian,forexample.Elemental.Thebloodisstrongerinthem,
butthere’snoguaranteeitwould’vebeenenough.There’sneveraguarantee.”
Helookedatme.“Youcould’veevendied.”
Casteelstiffened.
“Ididn’t,”Iremindedhim,which
feltsillytodobecause,obviously,Ihadn’t.
“Itwasn’tenoughforMillie,”
Malikconfirmed.“Yourbloodwasn’tstrongenough.”
MystomachhollowedasIturned
toCasteel.
“Whatthefuck?”hewhispered.
“Isbethtookyourbloodwhile
sheheldyoucaptiveandgaveittoMillie,hopingitwouldbeenough.Butyou
weretooweakatthatpoint.Isbethhadn’ttakenyourcaptivityandwhatit
woulddotoyouintoconsideration.”
CasteelstaredatMalik,his
featuressharpeningandbecomingstarker.Isteppedinclosertohim.Hewas
justasshockedasIwas.
“ButIsbethhasIres,”Kieran
said.“Whycouldn’tsheusehisblood?”
“ThecageIsbethkeepshiminnullifies
theeatherinhisblood,renderinghimpowerless,andhisblooduseless,”Malik
explained.“Anotherthingshehadn’texactlyconsidered.That’swhyshekept
youalivewhenshehadotherAtlantianskilled.Sheneededyourblood.”
Ipressedmyfingerstomy
templeasCasteel’shandstartedmovingagainupanddownmyback.“Thenhow
didshebecomeaRevenant?”
“Callum,”Malikanswered.“He
showedIsbethwhattodo.”
“Thegoldenfuck?”Casteel
growled.
“Howoldisthis…Callum?”
Reaver’seyesnarrowed.
“Old.Don’tknowexactly.Don’t
knowwhereheevencamefrom,buthe’srealold.CallumknewhowtomakeRevenants.
It’smagic.Old,Primalstuff.”Malik’sjawworked.“AsfuckedupasIsbethis—and
noneofyoutrulyknowshowfuckedthatactuallyis—shelovesherdaughters.In
herowntwistedway.”
Mystomachgaveanothersinking
twist.
“Shecouldn’tletMilliedie,so
sheusedthatoldmagic.AndbecauseMilliehadeatherinherblood,itworked,”
Maliksaidafteramoment.“Itsavedher,andshebecamethefirstdaughter,
andIsbethstartedplottingforanotherchance.Aseconddaughter.”
Firstdaughter.
ThefullprophecyTawnyhad
sharedwithmehadreferencedthefirstdaughterwithbloodfulloffireand
fatedfortheonce-promisedKing.Goodgods,wehadevenhypothesizedthatit
hadreferredtoMalik.
ThisHandmaidenwasmysister,
thefirstdaughterspokenofinPenellaphe’sprophecy,andwe…
“Wearetrulytheproductofa
madwoman’sthirstforvengeance.”
“No.”Casteelturnedtome,
loweringhismug.“Youaremorethanthat.Youalwayshavebeen.”
Iwas.Irepeatedthatoverand
overuntilitfelttrue.
Maliksmiledtightly.“Millieshould’ve
kepthermouthshutaboutwhoshetrulyis.Onlyahandfulofpeopleknow,and
mostofthemaredeadnow.”Hisgazeshiftedtohisbrother.“Sheknewwhat
wouldhappenifshetoldsomeonethatlittlesecret.Thatpersonwouldbe
killed,andMilliewouldbearthebruntofIsbeth’sdispleasure.”
Istiffened.
“So,it’sgotmewondering,why
wouldshetellyouthat?Therehadtobeareasonforhertotakesucharisk.”
Malikstaredathisbrother,unflinching.“Wasn’tthere,Cas?”
Casteelhadsethismugaside.
“Shesaidsomeshit.”
Hisbrother’slipsthinned.“I
betshedid.”
Thehandonmybackslippedaway
asCasteelsteppedforward.Kierantensedwherehesat,hiseyesburninga
pale,luminousblue.
“Letmeclarify,”Casteelsaid,
hisvoicedroppinglowinthatsoft,deceptivewayitdidthatwasoftena
preludetosomeonebeingrelievedofavitalorgan.“Shesaidsomestuffthat
maybetrue,andotherstuffthat’sdefinitelybullshit.”
Malikchuckled.“Soundstomelike
shesaidwhatyoudidn’twanttohear.”
“YouknowwhatIwanttohear?”
Casteel’schindipped.“Whyyou’rehere.Whyyou’rehelpingusnow.”
“Maybeyoushouldtellyourwife
whyhersisterwouldtakesucharisk,”Malikcountered.
“Aretheygoingtofight?”Reaver
murmured.
“Lookslikeit,”Kierananswered,
glancingathim.“Itwouldn’tbeentirelyabnormalifso.”
Myhearthadstartedpoundingagain.
“Whatdidshesay?”
“Iwasgoingtotellyou,”
Casteelgrowled,hisangerstrokingmyskin.“Butit’snothingworth
repeating.”
Malikraisedhisbrows.“Maybe
it’syouwho’slivingindenial.Can’tblameyouforit.Iwouldn’twantto
believeiteither.”
“Believewhat?”Igrabbed
Casteel’sarm,stoppinghimashetookanotherstepforward.“Whatdidshetell
you?”
Hiseyesswungtome,buthe
saidnothing.Mysensesstretchedout,comingupagainstawall.Airsnaggedin
mythroat.Hewasblockingme,andthatcouldonlymean—
“Youwerecreatedforthesame
reasonthatMilliewas.Foronepurpose,”Maliksaid.“Yoursisterfailedher
Ascension.Youdidn’t.Andyoualreadysaidwhatthatpurposeis.Exceptyou’re
focusingjustonAtlantia,andit’ssomuchbiggerthanthat.Yourpurposeisto—”
“Remakethekingdoms,”Icutin.
“Therealms.Iknow.I’veheardthat.”
Malikshookhishead.“Your
purposeistodestroytherealmsMortaland
Iliseeum.That’showsheplanstoremakethem.”
“Thatsoundsabitexcessive,”
mutteredReaver.
Idrewback.Isbethhadsaidthat
shewantedtoseeAtlantiaburn.Butthis…thiswasnotthesame.Itwasentirely
somethingelse.Itsoundedalotlike…
Beware,fortheendwill
comefromthewesttodestroytheeastandlaywastetoallwhichliesbetween.
Stomachdipping,Iinhaledsharply.
Theprophecy—whathaditsaid?
Thatthefirstandseconddaughterswouldremaketherealmsandusherinthe
end.No.Justbecauseithadbeenwrittendidn’tmeanitwouldhappen.What
Isbethwanteddidn’tmatterforaslewofreasons.“Firstoff,I’mnoteven
powerfulenoughtodosomethinglikethat.”
Malikleanedforward,“First
off,youaren’tpowerfulenoughyettodothat.Youhaven’t
completedyourCulling.Then,youwillbe.”
“Powerfulenoughtodestroythe
realms?”Ilaughed.“Agodisn’tthatpowerful.”
“Idon’tthinkthat’swhatyou
are,”Casteelsaid.
Slowly,Iturnedtohim.“Come
again?”
“It’ssomethingIfiguredouta
bitago,”hetoldme.“Idon’tfullyunderstandorknowhowit’spossible,but
Idon’tthinkyou’reagod.”
“ThenwhatthehellamI?”I
threwupmyhands.
“APrimal,”Malikannounced.
Irolledmyeyes.“Oh,comeon.”
“Hespeaksthetruth,”Reaver
announced,andweallturnedtohim.“Bothofthem.You’reaPrimal—bornof
mortalflesh.”
Chapter35
Adullroarfilledmyears.MyhandfellfromCasteel’s
arm.Bornofmortalflesh,agreatprimalpower…
“Atfirst,Ithoughtyouknew
this,”Reavercontinued,drawingmefrommythoughts.“Youwereabletosummon
us.YouheldthePrimalnotam,butthenIrealizedyouknewsovery
littleabout,well,anything.”
Isnappedmymouthshut.
“Andyoudidn’tthinktotell
her?”Casteelasked.“Onceyourealizedshedidn’tknow?”
Thedrakenshrugged.
Casteelstraightenedtohisfull
height.Whilemyemotionsweretooallovertheplace,hisangerwasred-hot.
“Didyoujustshrug?”
“Yes,hedid.”Kieranglaredat
thedraken.“Ifyou’dbeenaroundhimlonger,thatwouldn’thavesurprised
you.”
“Look,Ifiguredshewasalready
dealingwithenough,”thedrakenreasoned.“Whethersheknewornot,wouldn’t
havechangedanything.She’dalreadysurvivedthebeginningoftheCulling.
There’snodangertoherorrisktohercompletingtheAscensionasthis
point.”
“Idon’tevenknowwhattosay.”
Iblinkedrapidly.“Youcould’vetoldmesothatIwasprepared.SoIwouldn’t
learnthisonthesamedayIlearnedIhadasister.OrwhenI—”
“Soundslikeyouknowwhatto
say,”Reaverinterrupteddryly.“Andyouhaven’tfinishedyourCulling.So,
congratulations.You’llbeprepared.”
“Youaretheworst,”I
whispered,suddenlyrememberingsomethinghe’dsaidaboutthedrakenknowing
whatmywillwas.IthasalwaysbeenthatwaywiththePrimals.Andwhen
I’dsaidIwasn’taPrimal,hehadn’tagreed.Cometothinkofit,Ididn’t
thinkhe’deverreferredtomeasagod,either.
“Waitaminute.Whywouldthenotam
havebeenanindicatorthatshewasaPrimal?”Kieranasked.“Thegodshavethe
notam.”
“Whywouldyouthinkthat?”
Reaverfrowned.“It’saPrimalnotam.Notagodnotam.Onlya
Primalcanformanytypeofnotam—abondsuchasthat.”
“Becausethat’s—”Kierancursed.
“Idon’tthinkanyonereallyknew.Wejustassumeditwasconnectedtothe
gods.”
“Youassumedwrong,”Reaver
statedflatly.
Outofthechaosthatwasmy
mind,somethingsuddenlymadesense.“That’swhyMalecneverhadthenotam.”
IturnedtoCasteelandthenKieran.“Ithoughtitwasbecauseofhisweakening
powers,buthewasn’taPrimal.”MyheadswungbacktoReaver.“That’swhyyou
saidIwouldbemorepowerfulthanmyfather.WhyIwouldn’thavetofeedas
often.Andthemist?Ididn’tsummonit,didI?”
“OnlyaPrimalcancreate
themist.”Reaver’sheadtilted,andacurtainofblondhairfellacrosshis
cheekashepickedupanotherbiscuit.“Whichisasignthatyou’reprobably
closetocompletingtheCulling.That,andyoureyes.”
“Thestreaksofeather?”I
asked.“They’regoingtostaylikethat?”
“Theymayturncompletelysilver
likeNyktos’,”heanswered.“Ortheymaystaylikethis.”
Feelingdizzy,Istartedtotake
astepback.Casteel’shandcamearoundthenapeofmyneck.Heturned,stepping
inclose.
“APrimal?”Aslowgrinspread
acrosshislipsashecaughtmygaze,holdingit.“Idon’tknowwhatIshould
callyou.Queen?Highness?Neitherseemsfitting.”
“Poppy,”Iwhispered.“Callme
Poppy.”
Hebenthishead,brushinghis
lipsoverthebridgeofmynoseashismouthnearedmyear.“I’llcallyou
whateveryoulike,aslongasyoucallmeyours.”
Iletoutashortlaughandfelt
Casteel’ssmileagainstmycheek.He’dsuccessfullypulledmebackfromthe
edgeofapanicspiral.
Reavermadeagaggingsound.“Did
heseriouslyjustsaythat?”
“Unfortunately,”Kieranmuttered.
Ignoringthem,Ifistedthe
frontofCasteel’sshirt.“Youknew?”
“Ionlyjustfigureditout.Some
thingsthatbothIsbethandMillicentsaid—theydidn’tmakesense.OrIcouldn’t
rememberrightaway.”
Drawingback,Istaredupat
him.“Likewhat?”
Hisgazesearchedmine.“Like
whenbothspokeofIsbeth’splanstoremaketherealms.Andthetimetheygave
meblood,andshesaid…”Shadowscreptintohisgoldeneyes.Hebrieflyclosed
themandthenlookedatReaver.“OnethingIdon’tunderstand.Howisshea
PrimalandnotMalecorIres?”heasked,slidinghishandundermyhairand
cuppingthenapeofmyneck.“AndhowissheaPrimalbornofmortalflesh?”
Reaverwasquietashesethis
half-eatenbiscuitaside.“ThatissomethingIcannotanswer.”
“Cannot,orwillnot?”Casteel
stated,hiseyeshardeningintogoldenjewels.
ReaverstaredatCasteeland
thenhisgazeflickedtome.“Cannot.YouarethefirstPrimaltobebornsince
thePrimalofLife.Idonotknowwhy.OnlythePrimalofLifecananswer
that.”
Well,itwashighlyunlikely
thatwe’dbeabletomakeatriptoIliseeumanytimesoontotryandfigure
thatout.
“Butwhat’sevenmoreimportant
iswhytheBloodQueenbelievesthatshewilldestroytherealms.”Reavereyed
Malik
“Shewon’t,”Casteelstated
withouthesitationordoubt.“TheBloodQueenissoconsumedbyvengeancethatshe’s
convincedherselfthatshecanusePoppy.”
“Yeah,that’swhatIthought,
too.Inthebeginning,”Malikadded.“ButthenIlearnedthatIsbethwasn’tthe
onlyonewhobelievedthatthelastChosenwouldawakenastheHarbingerand
theBringerofDeathandDestruction.”
“Bullshit,”Casteelgrowled,
evenasthegentlesweepofhisthumbcontinued.“Theprophecyisbullshit.”
“Notwhenspokenbyagod,”
Reaverbitoff.“NotwhenvoicedbythegoddessPenellaphe,whoistiedclosely
totheFates.”
Maliklookedatme.“Isbeth
namingyouafterthegoddesswhowarnedofyouwasnocoincidence.Shediditthinking
itwouldbringhergoodluckwiththeArae.”
Foramoment,abriefsecond,a
boltofpurepanicwentthroughme,stirringtheeatherinmychest.IfIwere
tofullybecomeaPrimal,Iwouldbepowerfulenoughtodojustastheprophecy
stated.MygazesnappedtoKieran,andheknewwheremymindhadgone.Hetoo
wasthinkingofwhatI’daskedofhim.Kierangaveacurtshakeofhishead.
Istartedtotakeastepback—to
gowhere,Ididn’tknow.ButIremindedmyselfthatIwasmorethanjustabyproduct
ofIsbeth’svengeance.
I…Iwasn’tIsbeth’s
tool.Herweapon.Iwasmine.
Mythoughts—myideals,choices,
andbeliefs—werenotpreordainednorgovernedbyanyonebutme.Thepanic
eased,breathbybreath.“Nomatterwhattheprophecysays,Ihavefreewill.I
controlmyactions.Iwouldn’tdosomethinglikethat,”Itoldhim,andawhisper
rosefromthatcoldplacedeepinmychest.OneIdesperatelyignored.“Iwon’t
takepartinwhateverIsbeththinksIwilldo.”
“Butyoualreadyhave,”Malik
countered,andachillsweptovermyskinasthosewordsechoedinIsbeth’s
voice.“Youwereborn.Yourbloodwasspilled,andyouAscended.Uponthat
Ascension,youwerereborn—birthedfromthefleshandfireofthePrimals.You
awakened.”Heshookhishead.“Maybeyou’reright.Perhapsyourchoice—your
freewill—isgreaterthanaprophecy.ThantheFatesandwhatIsbethbelieves.
Hell,that’swhatCoralenabelieved.Shewassureyouwouldusherinchange,but
notinthewayIsbethwanted.”
Mybodyflashedhotandthen
cold.“Youknewmymother?”AssoonasIsaidit,Irealizedthat,ofcourse,
hehadknownher.Hewould’vebeenatWayfairwhensheservedasaHandmaiden.
“Idid.”Hisgazeloweredas
tensionbracketedhismouth.“Shebelievedthat,givenachance—ifyouwere
raisedawayfromIsbethandtheAscended—youwouldn’tbecometheHarbingerwho
woulddestroytherealms.”
Ashudderranthroughmeasamemory
ofthatnightsurged.
“Ithastobedone,”the
facelessmansaid.“Youknowwhatwillhappen.”
“She’sbutachild—”
“Andshewillbetheendof
everything.”
“Orsheisjusttheendof
them.Abeginning—”
Isteppedback,myheart
thumping.“Abeginningofanewera,”Iwhispered,finishingwhatCoralenahad
saidto…
Malikwatchedme,andmystomach
twistedwithnausea.
Casteel’sarmencircledmywaist
ashepressedintomefrombehind.“Poppy?”Heloweredhisheadtomine.“What
isit?”
Myskinkeptflashingfromhotto
coldasIstaredatCasteel’sbrother,butIdidn’tseehim.Isawthemanwith
shadowsforaface.Thecloakedfigure.
TheDarkOne.
“Poppy.”Casteel’s
concernradiatedinwavesasheshiftedsohestoodbesideme.
Thesournessofshamecrowdedthe
backofmythroatasMaliksaidroughly,hisvoicepitchedlow,“Youremember.”
Thatvoice.
Hisvoice.
“No,”Iwhispered,disbelief
floodingme.
Maliksaidnothing.
“Whatthehellisgoingon?”
Casteeldemanded,hisarmaroundmetighteningasmystomachchurned.Istarted
tobendover,forcingmyselftoswallowdownthebilethathadrisen.
“Iwasbroken,”Maliksaidto
Casteel.“Youwereright.WhattheydidtoPreelabrokeme.ButIwasnever
loyaltothatbitch.Never.”
Casteeltensedatthename.
“Preela?”Iwhispered.
“Hisbondedwolven,”Kieran
growled.
Oh,gods…
“Notafterwhatshedidtoyou.
NotafterwhatJalaradidtoPreela.NotwhatshemademedotoMil—”He
inhaledsharply,stiffeningasraw,suffocatinganguishlashedmyskin.The
kindofsorrowthatwentbeyondtheboneandhurtmorethananywoundcould.And
itwassopotentIcouldbarelyfeelCasteelandKieran’ssurprise.Itgotlost
intheicyagony.“IwantedtokillIsbeth.ThegodsknowItriedbeforeI
realizedwhatshewas.Iwould’vekepttrying,Cas,butthatprophecy.”His
nostrilsflaredasheshookhishead.“Itwasnolongerabouther.You.Me.Millie.
Noneofusmattered.Atlantiadid.Solisdid.Allthepeoplewhowouldpaythe
priceforsomethingtheyhadnothingtodowith.Ihadtostopher.”
Casteel’sarmslippedawayfrom
mywaist,andheturnedtohisbrother.
Malik’seyesclosedtightly.“I
couldn’tletIsbethdestroyAtlantiaorthemortalrealm.Icouldn’tlether
destroyMillieintheprocess.Andshewasdestroyingher.”Angerand
guiltswirledthroughhim,stirringtheeatherdeepinmychest.Flateyesopened,
lockingonmine.“Ihadtodosomething.”
Thefloorfeltasifitrippled
undermyfeet.Icouldn’tfeelmylegs.Acuptoppledbehindme,rollingacross
thecounter.Reavercaughtit,hiseyesnarrowingastheycuttothetremblingblinds
overthewindow.Therattlingdaggersonthetable.
“Youhadtodowhat,exactly?”
Kieranasked,butCasteelhadgonesilentbecausehe…gods,hewasprocessing
everything.Fightingwithhimselftobelieveit
Malikstillstaredatme.Hisvoice
hoarse,hesaid,“IwaspreparedtodoanythingtostopIsbeth,andCoralena
knewthat.BecauseLeopolddid.”
Butshehad—
He’sherviktor.
MemoriesofthatnightinLockswood
slammedintome,clearandwithouttheshadowoftrauma.Ileanedintothecounter
astheycame,oneafteranotherafteranother.Allofitinrapidsuccession
andinseconds,stunninginitsclarity.
Shockinginwhatthe
recollectionsrevealed.
Angersurgedthroughme,burning
awaythedisbelief.Butthatwasn’ttheonlyemotion.Therewasastormofthem,
butthesorrowwasjustaspowerfulbecauseIremembered.Finally.And
apartofme,somethingthatwaseithernottouchedbythatfuryorstemmed
fromthatsamecoldplaceinme,alsounderstood
“Iremembereverything,”Isaid,
andtheroomsteadied.IsteadiedasIfocusedonMalik.“Why?Why
didn’tyoudoit,then?Finishit?”
Casteel’sheadturnedtome,and
Isawthathisskinhadpaled,almostasbadasithadwhenhe’dbeenin
bloodlust.“I’vedonealotofterriblethings—committeddeedsthatwillhaunt
metomylastbreathandbeyond—butIcouldn’tgothroughwithit.Evenbelieving
whatIdid,Icouldn’t,”hesaidwithadark,chokedlaugh.“Apparently,killing
achildwasalineIcouldnotcross.”
“Motherfucker,”Kieranrasped.
“No,”Cassaid,andthatone
wordwasharsh.Itbrookednoroomforargument.Itwasaproclamation.Aplea.
“Tellmeitisn’tso.”
Iwantednothingmorethantobe
abletodoso.
“Ihadmychance,too.WhenI
pulledyououtfromthecupboard?Iwasgoingtothen—rightthen.Iwasgoing
toendit.ButIcouldn’t.AndItriedagain.”Malik’sheadfellbackashe
lookedupattheceiling,andmyhandflutteredtomythroatwhereIfeltthe
phantompressofacoldblade.“Itriedagain,butthattime,Isawit—sawwhat
Coralenadid.”
Iseeit.Iseeherstaring
backatme.
Thosedisjointedmemoriesmade
sensenowthattheyhadbeenpiecedbacktogether.“Whatdidyousee?Who?”
Malik’seyesclosedthen,and
allthewhile,Casteelhadn’tmoved.“Her.TheConsort.Isawherin
youreyes,lookingbackatme.”
IinhaledsharplyasReavercursed.
“Idon’tknowhowit’spossible.
She’sasleep,right?”Maliksaid.“ButIsawher.”
“TheConsortsleepsfitfully,”
Reaversaid.“Sometimes,thingshappenthatreachhereveninsleep,partly
wakingher.”
“You’retheDarkOne,”Casteel
saidinthatdeceptivelysoftwayofhis.Iswungtohim,andIshould’vepaid
attentiontohimsooner.IfIhadn’tbeencaughtupinmydiscoveries,I
would’vesensedthevoidoficyrageformingbesideme.“YouledtheCravento
theinninLockswood.Youwenttheretokillher.”
“TheCravenfollowedthetrail
ofbloodIleftbehind,”headmitted.“ItwastheonlywayIknewI’dgetpast
CoralenaandLeo.”
Kieransaidsomething.Itcaused
Maliktoflinch,butCasteelwasathrobbingmassoffury,anditstrokedthe
essenceinmychest.Ihadtoshutmysensesdown.Itwastoomuch.
Casteel’seyeswereabright
gold,andhisvoice—gods,hisvoicewassmoothandladenwithpower.Awhisper
thatwasaboomhadhiswordsfallingovermyskinandfillingtheroom.“Pick
upadagger,Malik.”
AndMalik,Casteel’sbrother,
pickedupadaggerwithashakinghand—along,thickonewithawickedlysharp
blade.Thetendonsinhisneckstoodout.
“Onyourknees,”Casteeldemanded.
Malik’sentirebodytrembledas
heobeyed,fallingtohisknees.
“Putittoyourthroat,”the
Kingcoaxed,hisvoicevelvetandiron.
Acompulsion.
Hewasusingcompulsion.
Malikdidjustashe’dbeen
forcedtodo.
“Justsoeveryoneknows,”Reaver
said,“I’mnotcleaningupthismess.”
Iwasratherconflicted.Onthe
onehand,IwasgladtoseethatCasteelhadgottenalotofhisstrengthback.
Ontheother,hewasgoingtoforcehisbrothertoslithisownthroat.
Ididn’tknowhowIfeltaboutthat—about
theknowledgethatithadbeenMalik.Mybrother-in-law.Ididn’tknowhowto
feelaboutthefactthatIactuallyunderstoodwhyMalikfeltheneededtodowhat
hehad.
ButwhatIdidknowwasthatI
couldn’tletCasteeldothis.Itwouldn’tkillMalik,butitwoulddosomeserious
damage,andCasteeldidn’tneedthatweighingonhim.ThatwasamarkIwould
notlethimbear.
Isteppedforward,glancingat
Kieran.HeglaredatMalik,hischestrisingandfallingrapidly,andhisskinthinning.
Thewolvenwouldbenohelphere.“Don’tdoit,Casteel.”
“Stayoutofthis,”hebarked,his
gazehavingcapturedhisbrother’s.Casteel’schinrose.Afainttrickleofblood
appeared,coursingdownMalik’sthroat.
“Notgoingtohappen.Malikdidn’t
harmme,”Ireasoned.“Hestoppedbeforehecould.”
“Hestoppedbeforehecould?Do
youhearyourself?”Casteelfiredback.“Youwerehurtbecauseofhim.”
“Shewas,”Malikwhispered.
IshotaglareatthePrince.
“Youshouldjustbequiet.”
“Heleftyoutheretobetorn
apartbytheCraven!”Casteelroared.
“Hedidn’t,though.Hegotme
outofthere,”Isaid.“Iremembernow.”
“TheCravenhadalreadygotten
toher,”Maliktoldhim.“Bither.Clawedher—”
“Shutup,”IhissedatMalikas
ashudderranthroughCasteel.Reachingout,Igrabbedhisarm.“Hethoughthe
wasdoingwhatwasright.Itwasmessedup.Hewaswrong.Buthestopped.He
didn’thurtme—”
“Stopsayingthat!”Casteel’s
headwhippedtowardme,hiseyesswirling,goldenspears.Withhisattention
broken,hiscompulsiononMalikshattered.ThedaggerhitthefloorasMalik’s
shoulderslumped.“Hedidhurtyou,Poppy.Maybenotwithhishands,but
thoseCravenneverwould’vebeenthereifitweren’tforhim.”
“You’reright.”Ipressedmypalm
againsthischeek,channeling—
“Don’t.”Casteeljerkedhishead
backfrommytouch.“Don’tyoudareuseyourpowers.Ineedtofeelthis.”
“Okay.Iwon’t,”Ipromised,
placingmyhandonhischeekagain.Hedidn’tpullawaythistime,butIfelt
hismusclesflexingundermypalm.“You’reright.TheCravenneverwould’ve
beenthereifitweren’tforMalik,butheactedonwhatIsbethbelieved.The
faultlieswithher.”
“Thatchangesnothing.”Heglared
downatmeasMalikrosetohisfeet.“He’snotinnocentinthis.Hewasn’t
manipulated.Hemadeachoice—”
“Toprotecthiskingdom.To
protectyou.Therealms.Thatiswhyhemadehischoice.Noneofushave
tolikeitoragreewithit,butwecanunderstandit.”
“Understandit?Beingreadyto
killachild?Toevenconsiderit?”heexclaimedindisbelief.“Toputyouin
harm’sway.You?Myfuckingheartmate?”
“Hedidn’tknowthatthen.”I
fistedthefrontofhisshirt.
“EvenifIdid,Istillwould’ve
doneit,”Malikadmitted.“Istillwould’ve—”
“Shutup!”Ishouted.
Malikshookhishead.“It’sthe
truth.”
Casteelmovedsofast,Ididn’t
thinkevenReavercould’vestoppedhim—ifhehadwantedto.Heshotacrossthe
kitchen,slamminghisfistintohisbrother’sjaw.ThepunchknockedMalikback
intothechair.Hehadnochancetorecover.Casteeltookhimtothefloor,his
armswingingsofastthatitwasnothingbutablur.Thefleshysmackofhis
fistmakingcontactechoedthroughthekitchen.
“Casteel!”Iyelled.
HegrabbedMalikbytheshirt,
liftinghimfromthefloorashekeptpunchinghisbrother.
IwhippedtowardKieran.“Are
yougoingtostophim?”
“Nope.”Kierancrossedhisarms.
“Thefuckerdeservesit.”
Malikhadapparentlyhadenough.
HecaughtCasteel’swristandflippedhim,thensatup,bloodrunningfromhis
noseandmouth.ThebriefreprievelastedawholesecondasCasteelsprangto
hisfeetandslammedhiskneeintoMalik’schin,knockinghisheadback.
Andthendowntheywentagain,rolling
intothelegsofthetable.
IturnedtoReaver—
“Don’tlookatme.”Reaver
pickeduphisbiscuit.“Thisisentertainingasfuck.”
Myeyesnarrowed.“Youguysare
useless,”Isnapped,pivotingtowardthebrothers.Iwasthiscloseto
beatingthesnotoutofbothofthemmyself.Tappingintotheeather,Ilifted
myhand.Asilveryglowsparkedacrossmyfingers.“Knockitoff,”Isaidover
thegrunts.Eithertheydidn’thearmeorchosenottolisten.“Oh,forgodssake,
Ishouldbethefuriousone,andyetIhavetobetherational,calmone.”
Inmymind,Iwilledthemapart,
andwhatIwilled…well,itjoinedwiththeessence,anditworked.Perhapsa
littletoowellsinceIwasn’tallthatworriedaboutnotharmingeitherof
theminthemoment
Onesecond,theywererolling
aroundliketwoovergrowntoddlers.Thenext,theywereskiddingacrossthefloor
inoppositedirections.Malikslammedintothewallbelowthewindowwith
enoughforcethatitshooktheentirehouse.IwincedasKierancaughtCasteel
beforehetookoutthewolven’sleg.
Casteel’sheadsnappedinmydirection.
BloodsmearedhiscutlipasheleanedintoKieran’slegs.“Whatthefuck?”
“Exactly.”Ipulledthe
eatherbackin.
“Shit.”Malikpitchedtothe
side,coughingashebracedhisweightononearm.“Thathurtmorethananyof
hispunchesdid.Ithinkyoucrackedafewribs.”
“I’mabouttocrackyourfaceif
yousayonemoreword,”Iretorted.
“Crackhisface?”Casteel
repeated,hisbrowsflyingup.
“Yours,too,”Iwarned.
Aslow,bloodygrinspread
acrosshislips,andthatstupid,godsforsakendimpleappeared.Ijustknewhe
wasabouttosaysomethingthatwouldmakemewanttopunchhim.
“Uh,Ihatetointerrupt,”
Clarizasaidfromthedoorway,havingenteredwithoutanyofusnoticing.I
turnedtoher,mycheeksheating.Hereyeswerewide.“Butthere’sasmallarmy
ofRiseGuardsinthestreet,goingfromhousetohouse.”
Inthetimeittookmystomach
todrop,theshockingdiscoveriesweresweptaside.Casteelwasonhisfeet,joining
meashedraggedthebackofhishandoverhismouth.“Howclosearethey?”
“Twohomesdown,”Blazanswered,
duckingpastClariza.Hecarriedseveralcloaks,handingonetoeachofusas
hewentstraighttothetable,grabbingtwodaggers.Hesheathedoneinsidehis
boot.
Malikcursed.“Weneedtogetout
ofhere.Now.”
“I’llgrabourweapons.”Kieran
hurriedpastus,enteringthehall.
“Yougoouttheback.”Blaz
tossedClarizaaslenderdagger,whichsheslippedunderhersleeve.“We’ll
keepthemoccupiedforaslongaswecan.”
Concernforthemblossomed.“Can
younotcomewithus?”
Hidinganotherdagger,Clariza
sentmeabriefsmile.“I’dlovenothingmorethantoseemyancestralhome,
andIplantodothatoneday,butourplaceishere.Therearepeoplewhodepend
onus.”
“Descenters?”Casteelaskedas
Kieranreturned,handinghimasword.Isawthathehadmysatchel.
Blaznodded.“Eliancantellyou
thatquiteafewpeoplestandinoppositiontotheBloodCrown.Anentirenetwork
workingfromwithintousurptheAscended.Youmayhastenthatwhenyourarmies
arrive,butuntilthen,we’reneededhere.”
Atthesoundofhisancestor’s
name,CasteelshotMalikalookandthensteppedforward,claspingBlaz’s
shoulder.“Thankyou—thankyoubothforyouraid.”
ClarizabowedasIslippedthe
cloakon.“It’sourhonor.”
Aknocksoundedfromthefront
ofthehouse,andCasteelturned,graspingmycheeks.Histouchcalmedmy
nerves.“MyQueen?”
“Yes?”
“Ithinkyou’llbehappytoknow,”
hesaid,slidinghishandstotheedgesofthehoodasheliftedit,“thatyou’re
abouttocracksomefaces.”
Arough,shakylaughleftme,
andmyheartcalmed.ItwistedtowardClarizaandBlazasReaverandMalik
movedtothebackofthehouse.“Besafe.”
“Weneedtobeonourway,”Malik
said,liftingthehoodofthecloakhe’ddonnedasanotherknockcamefromthe
front.
Clarizaliftedherchinasshe
placedhercurledfistoverherheart.“Frombloodandash,”shesaidasBlazdid
thesame.
“Wewillrise,”Casteelfinished,
handoverhisheartashe,theKing,bowedtothem.
IsteppedbehindKieran,looking
upatMalikasBlazwentdownthehall.“Willtheybesafewhentheguards
come?”
“Possibly,”heanswered.
Thatwasn’texactlyreassuring.
“YouandIaren’tdonewithour
conversationeither.”Casteelsteppedinfrontofme,hiscloakhoodshielding
hisface.
Thatalsowasn’treassuring.
“That’llhavetowait,”Kieran
said,hishandonmylowerback.
“Whereto?”Reaverreachedfor
thebackdoor.
“Theharbor,”Malikanswered.
“LowerTown.”
Nodding,thedrakenopened—
FourRoyalGuardsstoodthere,
theirwhitemantlesripplinginthewind.
“Wheredoyouthinkyou’reall
going?”anolderguardasked.
OnlyReaverwasuncloaked,but
theguardtookonelookattherestofus,hoodedwithouridentitieshidden,
andwithdrewhissword.“Stepback,”heordered
Ididn’thaveachancetoeven
summontheeather.
Reaversnappedforward,grasping
theguard’sswordarmashestretchedouthisneck.Hisjawloosened,andhis
mouthgapedwide.Alowrumblecamefromhischestasastreamofsilveryfire
rippledoutfromhismouth.
Myeyeswentwide.
“Holyshit,”Casteelmurmured,
stiffeninginfrontofmeassilveryflamesrippledovertheguard.
“Yeah,”Kieranremarked.
Reavershovedthescreamingguard
backintoanother,andtheunnaturalfiresweptovertheotherman.Turning,
Reaverletoutanotherpowerfulstreamofflames,quicklylayingwastetothe
guardsatthebackdoor.
Thescentofcharredfleshrose
onthewind,turningmystomachasReaverstraightened.“Pathisclear.”
Casteelturnedtothedraken.
“Yeah,itsureis.”
Asharpyelpofpainsounded
fromthehouse,spinningmearound.Clarizacriedoutinalarm.
“Weneedtoleave,”Malik
insisted,toeingasideburntremains.
Weneededto,but…
“Theyaidedus,”Isaid.
“Andtheyknewthecost,”Malik
arguedasroughshoutsechoedfromthefrontofthehouse.
“Asdidwewhenwecametotheir
door.”Isteppedforward.Kieran’shandtightenedbrieflyonmycloakandthen
relaxed.
“Agreed,”Casteelsaid,hisgrip
firmingonthesword.
“Forgodssake,”Malikmuttered.
“Thisisn’tthetimetobeheroes.Ifyou’recaught—”
“Wewon’tbe.”Casteel’scloaked
headturnedtome.
Inodded,lettingtheessence
rushtothesurfaceasheavyfootstepsboundeddownthehall.SeveralRoyal
Guardsracedforward.Thethrobbingeatherlitacrossmyskinasmywillmerged
withtheessence.Afaint,silverywebbingspilledoutfrommeasitsparked
acrossmyhand,theshadowstwiningwiththeglowthickernow.
“That’snew,”Casteelcommented.
“Startedacoupleofweeksback,”
Kierantoldhimastheguardsjerkedtoahalt.
Theswordsdroppedfromthe
guards’hands,clatteringoffthefloorastheirneckstwistedtothesides,
cracking.
“You’llprobablybeconcernedto
hearthis,butalsonotsurprised,”Casteelsaid,andthesmoky,spicyflavor
inmymouthcrowdedoutthetasteofdeath.“ButIfoundthatwildly…hot.”
“There’ssomethingwrongwith
him,”Reavermutteredfrombehindus.“Isn’tthere?”
Theremostdefinitelywas,butI
lovedhimforit.
KieransnortedasanotherRoyal
Guardentered.Theessencestretchedoutfrommeasmychinlowered.The
webbingpulsedandthenrecoiled—
“Revenant,”Ispat.
Thebare-faced,unmaskedguardsmirked.
ItwasthenthatIsawhiseyes.Paleblue.
Casteeltwistedsharply,grabbing
adaggerfromthetableashethrewitinonesmoothmotion.Thebladestruck
true,strikingtheRevenantbetweentheeyes.“Let’sseehowlongittakesfor
youtogetupfromthat.”
“Aslongasittakesforthe
bladetoberemoved,”cameavoice.ThegoldenRevenantstrolledoutfromthe
shadowsofthehall.Callum.
“You,”Casteelseethed.
“Iimagineyou’refaringmuch
betterthanthelasttimeIsawyou,”Callumrepliedasfurywhippedthrough
me.Hewasn’talone.Aquickglanceshowedatleasthalfofdozenguardswith
him.Allpale-eyed.
“Reaver,”Isaid.“There’s
somethingIwouldlikeyoutodoforme,andyou’llbereallyhappy
aboutit.”
Thedraken’ssmilewasbloodthirsty
ashewalkedbetweenCasteelandme.
CallumglancedatReaver,a
paintedwingrisingononesideofhisface.“IthinkIknowwhatyouare.”
“AndIthinkyou’reabouttofind
outforsure.”SmokewaftedfromReaver’snostrils.
“Maybelater.”Callumheldupa
hand.
Clarizaappearedinthehall,
hernosebloodiedandabladeatherthroat.AguardshovedherinCallum’sdirection.
HetookholdofherasBlazshuffledforward,heldbyanotherguard.
“Areyouthatmuchofacowardto
usethemasshields?”Idemanded,furious.
“Yousaycoward,”Callumsaidas
Clariza’sangergathered,hotandacidic,inmythroat.“Isayclever.”
Kierancametostandonmyother
side.“Thisfucker’sgotjokes.”
“Endlessones.”Callumeyedthe
wolven.“Whenthisisallover,Ishallliketokeepyou.I’vealwayswanteda
petwolf.”
“Fuckyou,”Kierangrowled.
Angerwasn’ttheonlythingI
pickedupfromthecoupleasviolencethickenedtheair.Saltyresolvefilled
them,too.Theywerepreparedtodie.
ButIcouldn’tallowthat.
“Standdown,”IsaidtoReaver.
Thedrakenrumbled,butthesmoke
faded.
Callumsmiled.“Somewouldsay
humanityisaweakness.”
“Becauseitis,”anothervoice
intruded,andeverymuscleinmybodytensed.
CallumandtheotherRevenant
steppedasideasIimmediatelymovedtostandinfrontofCasteel.Afigure
cloakedincrimsoncameforward,butIknewitwasnoHandmaiden.
Slenderhandslifted,loweringthe
hood,revealingwhatIalreadyknew.
Isbethstoodbeforeus.Theruby
crownwasabsent,aswasthepowderthatlightenedherskin.Itstruckmethen
thatIhadseenherlikethisinherprivatechambers,withwarmer,pinkskin.
Thattime,justatdusk,whenshe’dshownmetheStarjewel—adiamondcoveted
throughoutthekingdomandknownforitssilverglow.
“Themostbeautifulthingsin
allthekingdomoftenhavejaggedandunevenlines,scarsthatintensifythe
beautyinintricatewaysoureyesnormindscandetectorevenbeginto
understand,”shehadsaid.
Itwastrue.Justasthoselike
her,withsmoothandevenlines,flawlessskin,andendlessbeautycouldbeevil
andugly.Andmymotherwasthemostmonstrousofthemall.Whatofmysister?
Shemaynotwanttoseetherealmsdestroyed,butwhathadshedonetostopour
mother?
“Yourcompassionformortalsisadmirable,
butit’snotastrength,”Isbethsaid,glancingatReaverbeforethosedark
eyessettledonme.“AtrueQueenknowswhentosacrificeherpawns.”
“AtrueQueenwoulddonosuch
thing,”Isaid,yankingdownthehoodsincetherewasnopointinwearingit
now.“Onlyatyrantwouldthinkofpeopleaspawnstobesacrificed.”
Shesmiledtightly.“We’llhave
toagreetodisagree.”HerheadtiltedtowardCasteel.“Oneofyoudestroyedmy
cell.Anapologywouldbewelcomed.”
“Doanyofuslookasifwe’reabout
togiveyouanapology?”Casteelshiftedhisstancesoheblockedthehooded
Malik.Kierandidthesame.
“Strangerthingshavehappened,”
shesaid.“EvenstrangerthanaPrimalmistthatwaswithoutCravenuntilit
drewthemfromtheBloodForesttoourwalls.Nowthatwasclever.
Impressive,even.”
“Idon’tcarewhatyouthink,”I
bitout.
Isbetharchedabrowasshe
lookedaroundthekitchen,herlipcurlingindistaste.“Didyoureallythink
you’descape?Thatyou’dwalkrightoutofthecapital,andwithsomethingthat
belongstome,noless?”
lsnarledastheeatherthrobbed
inmychest.
“Iwasn’tspeakingofyou.”Her
gazemovedbehindus,andhersmiletwistedcoldly.“Him.”
CasteelstiffenedastheBlood
QueenstaredatwhereMalikstoodquietly.“Hedoesn’tbelongtoyoueither.”
“Iwassoproudofyou,”Isbeth
said.“Andyet,yetanotherDa’Neerbetrayedme.Shocker.”
“Betrayed?”Maliksoundedasincredulous
asIfelt.“Youkidnappedandtorturedmybrother.Youheldmecaptiveandused
meforwhateveryoudesired.Andyouaccusemeofbetrayal?”
“Herewegoagain.”Isbeth
rolledhereyes.“Gods,letitgo.”
“Fuckyou,”Malikspat.
“Neitherofushasbeen
interestedinthatinmanyyears,”sheretorted.“So,nothankyou.”
NausearosesharplyasIstared
atthiswoman—thisbeast—whowasmymother.
Hergazeflickedbacktome.“If
youhadstayedwhereyoubelonged,youcould’veavoidedthis.Wewould’ve
spokentoday,andIwould’vegivenyouachoice.Onethatwould’veresultedinhis
freedom.”ShejerkedherchininCasteel’sdirection.“Andfarlessmayhem.But
thisway?It’sfarmoredramatic.Icanappreciatethat,asItoolovetomake
ascene.”
Myhandssqueezedintofists.
“Whatareyoutalkingabout?”
“Achoice,”sherepeated.“One
thatI’mstillwillingtoofferbecauseI’mthatgraciousandforgiving.”
“Youaredelusional,”Isaid,
rattledbytherealizationthatshetrulybelievedthosewords.
Isbeth’seyesnarrowed.“You
knowwhereMalecis.Yousaidsoyourself.Ifyouexpecttoleavethiscity
withyourbeloved,youwillfindhimandbringhimtome.”
Chapter36
“Whatinthehell?”Malikexclaimed,histartconfusion
echoingmine,butourconfusionwasn’ttheonlyemotionIfelt.Afaintertrace
camefrom…
CallumstaredattheBlood
Queen,hisgriponClarizastillfirmbuthisbrowsrisingunderthewinged
mask.
“Whatdoeshehavetodowithanything?”
Casteeldemanded.
“Everything,”shereplied,
toyingwiththediamondring.“Bringhimtome,andhewillgivemewhatIwant.”
“Youthinkhewillhelpyou
destroytherealms?PunishNyktos?”Casteel’sbrowslifted.“Youknowhowlong
he’sbeenentombed.Hewon’tevenbeabletoholdaconversationwithyou,let
alonehelpyoudestroyanything.”
Isbeth’sgazesharpened.“Buthe
will.”
“YourMajesty,”Callumbegan.“This
isnot—”
“Silence,”Isbethordered,her
starefixedonme.
TheRevenantstiffened,hiseyes
narrowing.HewasclearlyunawareofwhateverIsbethplannedorwanted.
AndIwas,well,utterly
thunderstruck.ThiswashowshebelievedIwouldaidherindestroying
Atlantiaandpossiblytherealms?ByfreeingMalec?Casteelwasright.Malec
wouldn’tbeinanystateofmindtotakepartinwhatevershethoughtshecould
accomplish.“JusttomakesureIunderstandthiscorrectly,youthinkIwill
leave,findMalec,andthenreturnwithhimsothatyoucanthenusehimto
destroymykingdom?Therealms?”
“That’sexactlywhatIthink.”
IglancedatReaver,whohad
gonecompletelystillandquietashewatchedtheBloodQueen.“Whywouldn’t
youjustaskthatItellyouwhereheis?”Iquestioned.
“BecauseIwouldn’tbelieve
you.”
“AndyetyoubelieveIwilldo
asyourequestonceIleavehere?”
Herstaremetmine.“AsIsaid,
Iwould’veofferedyouhisfreedominexchange.Istilldo.”
“DoIlooklikeI’minchains?”
Casteelsnarled.
“Theymaynotbearoundyour
neck,butthosechainsarestillthere.Except,now,they’rearoundeveryone’s
neck—justindifferentforms.Revenantssurroundthispitifulexampleofa
home.Theentiredistrictisfullofthem.Toomanyforyourinteresting
travelingcompaniontohandlewithoutharmingthoseinnocentpeopleyouall
worrysomuchabout.Should’veknownyou’dbringadrakenwithyou.”Shesenta
quick,displeasedlookinCallum’sdirection.He’dhandedoffClarizatoanother
butremainedhalfshieldedbyher.“Bethatasitmay,youhavetoknowthat
yourcharming—albeitdestructive—escapadeshavecometoanend.Andwhileyou
maybelievetheworstofme,IamamostgenerousQueen.”
Ialmostchoked.
“FindMalecandbringhimtome,
andIwillletyouleave.IwillallowCasteeltogo,too.”Shewatchedmeclosely,
waiting.“Youranswershould’vebeenimmediate,Penellaphe.Iknowyouwilldo
anythingforhim.”
Iwoulddoanythingfor
Casteel,butMalecwasagod—onewhohadbeenentombedforhundredsof
years.HewasthesonofthePrimalofDeathandhisConsort.Icouldn’teven
begintofathomwhatreleasinghimwouldmeanordo.
IquicklyglancedatReaver
again.Hisexpressionwasunreadable.WhatintheworldwouldNyktosandhis
ConsortdoifMalecwerefreed?Thenagain,asfarasIknew,theyhadn’tintervened
uponhisentombment.
Butthiswasit?Howshesought
touseme?ThiswaswhatIwasborntodo?Thenwhyhadshewaiteduntilnowto
askthisofme?Shecould’vemadetherequestthefirstmomentshe’dspokento
mehere.Shecould’vesentherofferwithhergift
Somethingaboutthisdidn’tmake
sense.Hell,alotofthings,actually.Startingwithwhyshebelievedthat
Malecwouldbeabletogiveherwhatshewanted,andendingwithwhatshethought
wouldhappenafterward.“IfIagree,thenwhat?YouandMalecdestroyAtlantia,
remaketherealms,andcallitaday?AndifIrefuse?”
Hereyeshardened.“Ifyou
refuse,Iwillmakesureyouregretituntilthelastbreathyoutake.”
ThePrimalessenceroaredto
life,pressingagainstmyskin.Iknewimmediatelythatshewasreferencing
Casteel.“Andwhatdoyouthinkwillhappentoyouifyoudothat?”
“Iknowwhatyouwilldo,”shesaid,
smiling.“ButIalsoknowyouwon’tletitgettothatpoint.Youwill,inthe
end,cometoyoursensesanddoasIbid.AndIknowthisbecausewhetheror
notyouadmitit,wearealike.Youcareforhimmorethanyoucareforany
kingdom.”
“Shutup,”snarledCasteel,stepping
forward.
SeveraloftheRevenantsmoved
incloserasIsbethsaid,“Butit’strue.She’sthesameasI.Wherewediffer
isthatIhavethecouragetoadmitthat.”Hergazeshiftedbacktome.“So,
whatwillitbe?”
Mythoughtsracedforward,beyond
thismoment.IwasconfidentthatIcouldkilltheQueen.Shewaspowerful,but
Iwouldn’tholdbackonher.Attheveryleast,Iwouldseriouslyinjureher.
Butifwhatshe’dsaidwastrue,
andRevenantsdidsurroundus?Reaverwouldonlybeabletotakedownsomany.
Peoplewouldgethurt.ThoseIcareddearlyaboutmightbeamongthem.
Andthatcoldpartinme…
Thepartthattastedofdeath…
Itwasn’tlikemymother.
Itwasworse.
IglancedatCasteel.Hisgaze
metmine,andhegavemeacurtnod.Ihatedevenentertainingtheideaof
complyingwithIsbeth,butshehadtoknowtherewasnowaythatMaleccould
assistherinseekingrevenge.Ididn’tthinkhehadanythingtodowithher
plans.Herofferstemmedfromthedesperationofbeingreunitedwithher
heartmate,nomatterwhatconditionhemaybein,andthathewasherweakness.
Onewecouldexploit.Starting
withagreeingtoherdemandswithnointentionoffulfillingthem.
“IwillbringyouMalec,”I
decided.
Therewasnorejoicing.Isbeth
wasquietforalongmoment.“YouaskedmehowIcouldtrustyoutoreturn.I
hadyourKingoncetoensureyourcooperation.Now,whatdoIhavetodoto
ensurethatyouwillnotseektobetrayme?”
“Iguessyouwilljusthaveto
waitandsee,”Iretorted.
Isbethgaveaclose-lippedlaugh
ashereyesshiftedtoCallum.Thatwastheonlywarning.TheRevenanthesitated
foronlyamoment,buthewasquick,unsheathingaslenderblackdaggerashe
snappedforward.Shadowstone.ReaverturnedtohimasCasteelswung
hissword.
ButRevenantswereincredibly
fast.
Callumdraggedtheshadowstone
downKieran’sarmashewhisperedsomething—wordsinalanguageIcouldn’t
understandbutthattheessenceinmychestpulsedinresponseto.Ashadowy,reddish-black
smokehoveredovertheshallowcut,muchasithadswirledaroundthechamber
inMassenewhencontrolledbyVessa.
“Whatthefuck?”Kieranexploded
asMalikgrabbedhimfrombehind,yankinghimback.Theshadowrippledover
Kieran’sentirebody,throwingMalikbackasCasteeldrovethebladethrough
Callum’schest.
Athinstreakofbloodappeared
onKieran’sarmashetriedtoshakeofftheshadow.Igrabbedhisarmasthe
shadowysmokesankintohisskin,disappearing.“Whatdidyoudo?”Icriedout
aspanicerupted,myheadwhippingtowardIsbeth.AllIsawwasTawny’spronebody,
unmovingafterbeingstruckbyshadowstone
Callumstumbledback,pulling
himselffreeoftheblade.“Gods.”Bloodfrothedfromhismouthashefellonto
thetable.“Thatstunglikea—”theRevenantsaidasheslidtothefloor,dead
fornow.
Heartthumping,Iclosedmyhand
overKieran’swound,conjuringhealingwarmth
“Noneedtopanic,”Isbethsaid
softly.“Hewillbefine.Theshadowstonewillhavelittleeffectonawolven.
It’sthecurseCallumpassedonthatyoushouldbeconcernedwith.”
“What?”Casteel’seyeswerea
stormofgolden,swirlingflecks.
“Onewithatimelimit.Oneonly
Icanlift,”Isbethanswered.“ReturnwithMalec,oryourpreciouswolvendies.”
Kieran’slipsparted,andmy
rageswelledoncemore.
Casteellungedather,butMalik
twisted,catchinghimasKieransnappedforward—
“Letitgo.”Reaverthrewoutan
arm,blockingKieran.Hestareddownatthewolven.“Letitgo.”
Kierangrowled,throwingoff
Reaver’sarm.Buthebackedaway,breathingheavily.Thecutremainedonhis
arm.Withasshallowasitwas,onlythebriefesttouchshould’vehealedit.
Isbethremainedunmoved,bored
even.Ihatedher.Gods,Ihatedher.
“Ineedtime,”Imanaged.“Therefore,
Kieranneedstime.”
Hereyeslitwiththatfaint
glow.“Youhaveaweek.”
“Ineedlongerthanthat.The
kingdomisvast.Threeweeks.”
“Two.Yourwolvenwillbefine
forthatlengthoftime.Nomore.”
“Fine,”Iclippedout,sensing
Kieran’sworry.Twoweekssoundedlikealotoftime,butnotwhenwehadno
ideawheretobeginintheBloodForest.IfwecouldnarrowdownMalec’slocation…
“Ineedsomethingelse.SomethingthatbelongedtoMalec.”
Herbrowpinched.“Why?”
“Doesitmatter?”Iasked.
“Depends.WillIgetitback?”
“Idon’tknow.Maybe?Withit,I
shouldbeabletoreachhistombquicker.”
Isbeth’sgazenarrowedonCallum,
alreadyreturningtolife.Herlipspursedassheglanceddownatthediamondring
shewore.“Ihavethis.Itbelongedtohim.Hegaveittome.”
“IknewitwasAtlantiangold,”
Casteelmurmured.
“Itshouldwork,”Isaid.Just
asmybloodshouldalsowork,atleastaccordingtoLordSven.
Shestartedtoremovethering,
hesitated,andthenpulleditoffasCallumroseslowly.“It’sallIhaveof
him.”Hergazelifted,eyesshiningwithunshedtears.“That’sit.”
Isaidnothing.
IfeltnothingasIliftedmy
hand,palmup.“IneeditifyouwantmetofindMalec.”
Pressingherlipstogether,she
reachedoveranddroppedtheringintomyhand.Itookit,slippingitintothe
pouchwiththetoyhorse.Ashudderwentthroughher,andforaheartbeat,Itasted
herbittergrief.
Ididn’tcare.
“WeshallmeetattheBone
Temple,beyondtheRise,twoweeksfromnow,”Isbethsaid,dragginghergaze
fromthepouchI’dplacedtheringin.“Yourememberit.”
“Ofcourse.”TheancientTemple
waslocatedbetweenthemostnorthernpointofCarsodoniaandPensdurth,built
beforethewallsaroundbothcitieshadgoneup.Itwaswheretheremainsof
thePriestsandPriestessesweresupposedlyentombed.
“Thenit’sadeal.”Isbethtook
astepbackandstopped.“IwillallowCasteel,thedraken,andthewolvento
leave.ButnotMalik.”
“AsIalreadysaid,”—Casteel’s
eyesglowedabrightgold—“hedoesnotbelongtoyouanylonger.Heleaveswith
us.”
“It’sokay.”Malikbrushedpast
Kieran.“GoandfindMalec.”
“No.”Casteelwhippedaround,
andIknewinaninstantthatMalikwantedtoreturntoIsbeth.Not
forher,butforMillicent.Andtheeager,cruellightinIsbeth’seyestoldme
thatMalikwouldpaygreatlyforhisactions,likelywithhislife.Malikhad
toknowthat.
“Youcannothavehim,”Itold
Isbeth.“YouwantMalec?Youwillletallofusgo,includingMalik—”Istopped
myselfbeforeIsaidhername.Mysister.BeforeIaskedforher.She
wasn’tamongtheRevenantshere.IfIsaidhername,Iwouldbeputtingherin
danger.
“Letmepass,”Malikgrowled,
hispanicrisingandsettlingheavilyonmychest.
“Notgoingtohappen,”Casteel
warned.
“Iwasn’tasking.”
Casteelpushedhimback.“I
know.”
IgrabbedMalik’sarm.“You’re
nogoodtoanyonedead.”
Hepulledhisarmfree,beyond
reason,andIthoughtofCasteelwhilewe’dbeeninOakAmbler.Howhe’dhanded
himselfovertoIsbeth.Willingly.Forme.Noonecouldstophim.Noonewould
stopMalik,either,andCasteelrealizedthat.HisgazeflickedtoKieran.
Thewolvenstruck,slammingthe
hiltofhisswordintothebackofMalik’shead.Theresoundingcracksickened
me.IturnedtoKieran.
“What?”WithCasteel’said,hecaught
Malik’sdeadweight.“He’llbefine.”
“Huh,”Callummurmured,wiping
bloodawayfromhismouthwiththebackofhishand.“Thatwasunexpected.”
“Agreed,”Isbethdrawled,browsarched.
“HimorMalec,”Isaid.“That’s
yourchoice.”
Hereyesnarrowedoncemore,and
thenshesighed.“Whatever.Takehim.I’vegrowntiredofhimanyway.You’re
freetoleavethroughtheRiselikeacivilizedgroupofpeople.Itrustthat
youwillnotmakeasceneonyourwayout.”Sheturned,liftingherhood.Once
more,shestopped.“Oh,andonemorething,”shesaid.Therewasjustaflick
ofhereyes.
Thatwasall.
ClarizaandBlazwentstiffin
theircaptors’grasps,eyessowidethatnearlytheentirewhiteswerevisible.
Blooddrainedrapidlyfromtheirfaces.Tinyfissuresappearedacrosstheircheeks,
theirthroats,andinanyvisibleskin.IstumbledbackintoCasteelastheir
skinshrankandcollapsedastheyfell—astheyshriveledintothemselves,
becomingnothingmorethandried-outhusks.
Aguardnudgedthemwithhis
boot,andthey—piecesofthem—shattered.
“Don’tevenbothertryingto
restorelifetothem,”Callumsaid.“Noonecomesbackfromthat.”
ShockseizedmeasIstaredat
thestripsofdried,decayedskindriftingtothewood.MyhandstrembledasI
liftedmygaze.
“Youknowwhattheysay,”Isbeth
remarked,tuggingthecowlofthecrimsonhoodclosetoherthroat.“Theonly
goodDescenterisadeadone.”
Theroarinmyearsreturned,hitting
mychest,andtheessencerosetothesurfaceinaheartbeat.Therewasno
stoppingit.Ididn’teventryasthatfamiliartastegatheredinmythroat,
shadowyandfulloffire.
Death
Ancientpowerthrobbedinmy
bones,filledmymuscles,andcoursedthroughmyveins,seepingintomyskin.I
screamed,givingdeathsound.
Silverylightlacedwiththick,
churningshadowsspilledfromme.SomeoneshoutedasIsteppedforward,the
floorcracking,thewoodsplittingundermysteps.Thetemperatureof
theroomdroppeduntilraggedbreathsformedmistyclouds.Coldrageleftmein
aburstofenergy—ashockwaveofessencehittingtheair.Thetableandchairs
turnedtodustastherageslammedintothewalls.Theystretchedunderthe
weight.Plasterandstonegroaned.Theroofshuddered,andthenthewallsshattered
asthedark,oilysensationspreadinsideofme.Old.Cold.Aharbinger.
Someofthestoneturnedtoash
inthesunlight.Largechunksflewthroughtheair,mowingdowntheRevenants
whohadbeenoutside,crashingintoandthroughnearbybuildingsas
theshadowandlightspreadoutaroundme,formingthick,cracklingtendrils.
Myskinflashedcoldandthenheatedwithaseriesofsharptingles.Therehad
beenmortalguardsamongtheRevenants.Thechurningmassofmoonlightandmidnight
foundthem,stoppingthemastheyrushedtowardme,andIleftnothingofthem
behind.
Iwasdonewiththis.
Saltywindwhippedin,along
withshrillsounds.Screamsthatcarriedabittertaste.Fear.Thewindandthe
screamsliftedmyhairasIcalledontheessence.Cloudsdarkenedoverheadand
overthesea,rollinginandthickening,adarksnarljoiningthegrowl.The
floorboardssplinteredasIstalkedforward,towardtheRevenantsguardingher.
Shestoodinthecenterofthem,herfacehidden,butIfelthersmile.Her
pleasure.Excitement.Itbubbledinmythroat,mixingwiththedeath
andterrorasmortalsspilledintothestreets,scramblingfromtheirnearby
homesasthewallsbegancrackingandshuddering.Roofspeeledoffandwhippedinto
theairasaboltoflightningslammedintothecliffs.
“Doit.Letallthatrage
out,”avoicecalled,coaxed.Itsoundedliketheonethathadwhisperedin
thedarknesssomanyyearsago.“Doit,Harbinger.”
Iwantedto.
Mywillbegantogrow
beyondme,callingon—
Anarmclosedaroundmywaist,
piercingthechurningandsnappingmassaroundme.Thecontactstartledme.Ahand
curledundermychin,pullingmeback.“Stop,”adifferentvoiceurged,one
thatwarmedthecoldspotsinsidemeandcooledtheheatofmyskin.Casteel.
Sobrave.Soloyal.Hepulledmebackagainsthischest,unafraidofthepower
lappingathisskin,sparkingoffit.Buthehadnoreasontobeafraid.I
wouldn’thurthim.
“Youneedtostop,”hesaid.
“No,”Iargued,thewordsoftand
fullofshadowandfire.Anotherroofpeeledoff,flyingouttosea.“Iamdone
withthis.”Istartedtopullaway
Casteelheldon.“Notlikethis.
Thisiswhatshewants.TheRevenantsaren’tattacking,Poppy,”hesaid,his
voicelowandinmyear.“Look,Poppy.Lookaroundyou.”Heturnedmyhead,and
Isawthe…
Isawthethicktendrilsof
eatherspittingembers,andtheruinedhomesbeyondtheonewewerein.The
darkclouds,andthemortalsontheirknees,handsovertheirheadsastheyhid
undertreesandpressedthemselvesagainstthesidesoftremblingwalls.Isaw
theminthestreetsofStonehill,shieldingchildrenaslimbsoftreessnapped
andfelltotheground.Theywereterrified,huddledandcryingandpraying
ButIwouldn’thurtthem.
“Youarenother,”Casteelsaid,
squeezingme.“That’swhatshewants,butyouarenother.”
IsawKieranthen,thetendons
inhisneckstarkasifhewerefightingtheneedtoshift…
Asifhefoughttherealization
thathewouldhavetodowhatI’daskedofhiminOakAmbler.
Myentirebodyshuddered.I
closedmyeyes.Iwasn’t…Iwasn’ther.Iwasn’tdeath.Ididn’twantthis.
Scaringmortals.Hurtingthem.Iwasn’ther.Iwasn’t.Iwasn’t.Iwasn’t.
Panicked,IshutdownmysensesandpulledthePrimalessenceback.Theshadow-tinged
eatherretractedandrecoiled,returningtome.Theweightofunspentpower
settledinmychestandonmyshouldersasIopenedmyeyes.
Darkcloudsscatteredand
sunlightreturned,glisteningofftheunfiredshadowstonearrowsheldbythe
still-standingRevenantsandpointedatus—atme.Themortalshadrisenbuthad
allgonequietandstill,theirfearscratchingagainstmyshields.
AndthenIheardtheirwhispers.
Mygazeshottowherethedoorway
tothekitchenhadoncebeen,towheretheremainsofClarizaandBlazlay.
AnothertremorrockedmeasIliftedmystare.Ididn’tseeIsbethatallin
thecrushofRevenants,butIsawCallum.
Hestoodonlyafewfeetaway,
hisgoldenshirtstainedwithblood,andhisblondhairwindblown.Hesmiled
Ijerked,pullingagainst
Casteel’shold.
“Later,”hewhispered,smoothing
hispalmovermycheek.“Later,wewillstandinwhatisleftofhisbones.
That,Ipromiseyou.”
Callum’sheadtilted—theonlyindication
thathe’dpossiblyheardCasteel.Hissmilegrew,andIknewthatnoneofthem
hadbeensureIwouldreactinsuchaway,buttheyhadhopedIwould.Because
thosewhispers…
I’ddonewhatIhaddemandedthe
Atlantiangeneralsnotdouponseizingthecities.I’ddestroyedhomes.
I’dpossiblyevenhurtinnocentmortals.Andinmyrage,I’dbecomewhatIsbeth
hadpaintedmeas.
TheHarbinger.
Chapter37
Casteel
Poppywentstiffagainstmeaswerodethehorses—provided
tousattheedgeofStonehill—pastgrazingsheep.She’dbeenmostlyquiet
sincewe’dleftwhatremainedofthehomes,butthiswasdifferent.
Theclusterfuckthatwasmymind
sincewe’dleftCarsodoniaslowedasIglanceddownatthetopofherhead,her
hairadeepcopperinthesunlight.
AsmilespreadacrossPoppy’s
upturnedface—thefirstoneI’dseensincewe’dwalkedoutoftherubbleof
thathome.“Padonia.”
Myheartactuallyskipped
atthesightofthesmile.“What?”
Eyesclosed,sheheldupahand.
Then,Iunderstood.PoppyhadbeenusingthePrimalnotamtoreachthe
wolvenforthelastcoupleofhours—namelyDelano.
ThePrimalnotamtookon
awholenewmeaningnow.
Wondersweptthroughmeonce
more,alongwithalingeringtraceofdisbeliefasthepinchofconcentration
settledintoherbrow.MywifewasaPrimalgod
Man,ifIdidn’tthinkIwasworthy
before…
Ialmostlaughed,exceptthe
deathsofthemortalcouplewho’daideduswasahauntingpresence.
Aswasthewaythemortalshad
respondedtoPoppy,fleeingfartherintoCarsodoniainfear.
Mygazeflippedtotherolling
greenhills.AllIsawweresheep,nervousfarmers,andRiseGuards.Couldn’t
reallyblametheanxiousmortals.Ourgroupdrewattention,andithadnothing
todowithustravelingoutsidetheRisewithoutaguardoranyHuntsmen.
ItwaspartlybecauseofKieran.
Inhiswolvenformprowlingbesideus,hewaslargerthananywolfthefarmers
orguardshadeverseen.AnditwasalsoMalik,boundbyaportionofthe
chainsthathadbeenaroundmywristsandastrideahorseguidedbythedraken.
Noneofustrustedthathewouldn’trunbacktoCarsodoniatheverysecondhegot
achance.
ThatbeautifulcurveofPoppy’s
lipsfadedasthethickfringesofherlashessweptup.“IreachedDelano,”she
said,likeitwasnothing.Asifshehadspokentohimwhilehestoodafew
feetaway.“TheyweresupposedtowaitforusinThreeRivers,buthesaidthey
hadtogotoPadoniafirst—it’snearLockswood.”
Myarmtightenedaroundherwaist.
“Iknowwhereitis.”Ididn’tknowmuchaboutthemostlyfarmingcommunity.
HadnoideawhatAscendedruledorhowmanycalledtheisolatedtownhome.But
IdidknowthatCravenattackswerefrequentduetoitsproximitytotheBlood
Forest.“Didhesaywhytheywentthere?”
Sheshookherhead.“Delanosaid
hewouldexplainoncewegottherebutthatwe’dunderstand.Thebulkofthe
armiesarewiththem,exceptforafewbattalionstheylefttosecuretheother
citieswetook.”Herhandreturnedtomyarm,andherfingersmovedidly.“I
don’tknowwhatcould’vedrawnthemthere.Wedidn’tplanontakingPadonia,
insteadfocusingonthelargercitiesfirst.ButI…Isenseditwasn’tgood.”
Onlythegodsknewwhatlevelof
fuckeryhaddrawnthemthere.Ishiftedbehindher,slidingmyhandtoherhip
asIlookedpastthehillstothedistantcrimsonglowonthehorizonwherethe
BloodForestloomed.“PadoniaisclosertotheBloodForestthanThreeRivers.
We’llmeetwitheveryone,seewhatthehellisgoingon,andthentraveltothe
BloodForestfromthere.”
Poppyturnedherheadtome,her
voicelow.“IletDelanoknowaboutMalik.Iwasn’tabletotellhimalot,
otherthanit’scomplicated.”Shepaused.“Ithoughtyourfathershouldbe
givenaheads-up.”
WhileIwasn’tsuremyfatherdeserved
it,ourfriendsdid.Iloweredmyhead,kissinghercheek.“Thankyou.”
Asmilestartedtoreturn,but
sheturnedherheadsuddenly,inhalingsharplyassheraisedherhandtoher
othercheek,rubbingjustbelowthebone.
“Youokay?”Iaskedasquietly
aspossible.Still,thedrakenandKieranturnedtheirattentiontous.
“Justanache.IthinkI’vebeen
grindingmyteeth,”shesaid,glancingbackatthemortalsassheloweredher
handtomywrist.Thatsimpletouch…gods,Icherishedit.Severallongmoments
passedbeforeshesaid,“Ishould’veknownshe’ddosomethingsoterrible.”
Iknewexactlywherehermindhad
notonlygonebutalsostayedsincewe’driddenoutofthecapital,passing
homeshereandthereadornedwithwhitebannersabovethedoors.Bannersthat,
accordingtoMalik,signifiedthattheywereahavenforDescenters.“Thefact
thatyoudidn’tiswhyyou’renothinglikeher.”Dippingmyhead,Itouchedmy
lipstohertempleoncemore.“Somethingsyoucan’tprepareyourselffor,even
ifyouseethemcoming.Sheisoneofthem.”
Poppyshiftedherattentionforward,
towherethehorizonshoneasifithadbeenbathedinblood.“Howlongdoyou
thinkitwilltakeforustoreachPadonia?”
“Aboutaday’sride,lessifwe
push.ButIdon’tthinkthesehorsescanhandlethat.”
“Idon’teither.”Shepattedthe
mare.“They’llneedtherest.”
Wetraveledafewmorehours.
Alongtheway,Kieransnoopedaroundtheabandonedfarmhouses,alertinguswhen
hefoundsomethingofuseinthosethatappearedrecentlyvacated.Afewblankets
here.Bundlesofcuredbeefthere.Thedrakenspottedcherrybushesneartheold
road.Itwasn’tmuch,butwe’dmakedo.
Theskywasturningashadeof
deepblueandvioletwhenPoppypulledherselffromherthoughts.“Afterwe
findMalecandmakesurethecurseislifted…”Poppyrestedagainstme,buther
bodywasslowlybecomingtautwithtension.“Weneedtoendthis.”
Endthis
I’dspentthebetterpartofmy
lifeworkingtowarddestroyingtheBloodCrown.Solongthatitalmostfelt
surrealnowthatwewereonthecuspofdoingit.
Thatwe’dcometoapointwhere
theendwasinsight.
“Wedo.”Imovedmythumbina
slow,steadycircleonherhip,knowingshelikeditasmuchasIdid.The
ancientTempleIsbethhaddesignatedasameetingplaceformedinmymind,ablurry
memoryfrommanyyearsago.“TheBoneTempleisoutsidetheRisesofboth
CarsodoniaandPensdurth,situatedintheshadowofthecapital.Ourarmies
shouldbeabletoenterCarsodoniathroughtheirnortherngates.”
“It’snotanidealentrypoint,”
Poppysaid.“We’dbecominginthroughStonehillandCroft’sCross,andwe
wouldn’tbeabletogivepeopleanywarning.”
“No,wewouldn’tbeableto.”
Thatknowledgesettledheavilyinmygut.“Butthegatestherewon’tbeas
reinforcedasthemainones.”
Shenodded,exhalingslowly.
“Thosewhiteclothsonthedoorsofhomes?Windows?InMasadonia,theymeant
thatonewascursed—infectedbyaCraven.Ihadnoideatheymeantanything
else,especiallynotthattheydesignatedahavenforDescenters.”
NeitherhadI.
“Howmany?”Reaveraskedof
Malik,andItensed.“Doyouknowhowmany?”
Malikliftedhishead.“Thousands,
ifnotmore.AllwhowouldgiveaidthemomenttheyrealizedthatAtlantian
armieswereattheRise.”
“Thousands,”Poppymurmured.“That’s…that’s
alot.”
“Buttherearehundredsof
thousandsthatbelieveyoutobetheHarbinger,”Malikadded.“Andwhat
happenedinStonehillwon’tdomuchtoswaytheirmindsorloyalties.”
Poppystiffened.
“Shutup,”Iwarned.
“It’snotpersonal,”hesaid,
lookingatPoppy.“I’mjusttellingthetruth.”
“Iknow,”sherepliedquietly.
“WhatIdidwon’thelpourcause.”
Bysheerforceofwill,I
managedtostopmyselffromlaunchingfromthehorseanddoingworsethan
bloodyingmybrother’snoseagain.Therewasawholelotofshitbetweenus.I
could’veeventuallyacceptedwhyhe’dchosentoremainundertheBloodQueen’s
fist—fuck,I’ddothesameifshehadPoppy.Iwasn’tabigenoughassholenot
toadmitthat.Butitwashim.TheDarkOnewhohauntedPoppy’snightmares.
Andhewaslookingatherforfarlongerthanhefuckingdeserved.
Poppysqueezedmywrist,andIunlocked
myjaw,forcingmyattentionfromhim.
“Ican’tbelieveyouareall
actuallyplanningtogiveherMalec.”Malikfacedforward,addinghistwo-fucking
centsthatnoneofushadaskedfor.“Thatyouwoulddoanythingshewants.”
“PerhapsIknockedyourhead
aroundalittletoohardsinceitappearsyou’veforgottenthatwedon’thavea
choice.”Myeyesnarrowedonhim.“WewillnotletanyharmcometoKieran.”
Malik’sgazecuttothewolven,
whoeyeballedhimasifhewantedtotakeachunkoutofhisleg.Heshuddered,
stretchinghisfingerswheretheywereboundathisback.“Idon’twanttosee
anythingbadhappentoyou.It’snotlikeIdon’tcare.”
“YouknowwhatIdon’tcare
about?”Ismiledtightly.“Youropiniononthis.”
“Realmature,”Malikspat.
“Gofuckyourself.”
Poppy’shandtightenedonmy
wristoncemore.“Shewon’tbeabletokeephimbecauseshewillbedeadsoon
afterward,”shetoldhim.“Andit’snotlikeMalecisarisk.Hecanbeinno
conditiontobeathreattousoranyone.Atleast,notintheshortperiodof
timehewillbeinherpresence.ButeveniffreeingMalecposesarisk,we’re
stilltakingit.”
Thedrakenfrowned.“Areyouall
reallythatworriedaboutthecurse?”Heaskedwhathadtobethemostidiotic
questiononecould.
“Yes,”Poppystatedflatly.“We’re
reallythatworried.”
Hisheadtilted.“Thecurseprobably
won’tworkonyourwolven—”Hestoppedhimself.“Well,thenagain,itmight
work.TheessencetheRevenantusedcarriedKolis’sstench.ThatwasaPrimalcurse.
So,maybeyouhavearighttoworry.”
Istaredatthedraken.“Careto
elaborateonthisthoughtprocess?”
“Ican’tbelieveIhaveto
explainthisoutloud,”thedrakenmuttered.“You’reJoined,right?Bothof
yourlivesaretiedtohers—toherverylong,likenearlyunendinglifespan.
Unlessshegoesdown,neitherofyoutwoshould.”
IheardPoppy’ssharpinhale.
“Butagain,”thedrakenwenton,
“thatwasaPrimalcurse,so…”
Thedrakenwasstilltalking,but
Iwasn’tlistening.Poppy’snailsdugintomywristasshestareddownatKieran.
He’dslowed,onlybecauseourhorsehad.Underthethick,fawn-coloredfur,I
sawthatthemusclesofhisshouldersweretense.
“Hell,”Malikmutteredandthen
laughedroughly.Thelinesofhisfacerelaxed.“Ihadn’teventhoughtof
that.”
Itightenedmyarmaround
Poppy’swaist.Hergriponmywristeased,andherfingersmoved,mimickingthe
circlesImadeonherhip.Sherelaxed.
AndsodidI.
Poppy
MyminddriftedfromwhatI’dlearnedandallthathad
happenedaswestoppedforthenight,eatingourdinnerofcuredmeatand
cherriesamidtheblackwalnuttrees.
Everythingwashardtotakein.
ButCasteelwashere.
Hewasfree.Sowashis
brother—whetherhelikeditornot.Theywerebothfree.Thatwasalmostall
thatmatteredrightnow.
Almost
Unfortunately,thecursethat
CallumhadplacedonKierangroundallotherthoughtstoahalt.Italsomattered
now.Mychestclenchedas,inmymind,Isawthatshadowysmokeseepinginto
hisskin.HeardwhatReaverhadsaid—hadsuggestedcouldbeananswerincase
wecouldn’tfindMalec,orIsbethsoughttobetrayusjustasweplottedtodothe
sametoher.
Italsowasn’tthefirsttime
I’dthoughtoftheJoiningbeing—
Adullflareofpainspread
acrossmyupperjaw,causingmetoinhalesharply.Wincing,Irubbedatmycheek.
Theachesankintotheveryrootsofmyteethandthenfadedasquicklyasit
hadappeared.
“Yourheadhurting?”Kieran
askedfromwherehesatbesideme,havingshiftedintohismortalformabit
ago.
“Justalittle,butnot
anymore.”Iglanceddownathisarm.Theshallowcutwasstillthere.Mytouch
haddonenothing.“Howareyoufeeling?”
“Thesameasthelasttimeyou
asked.Ifeelfine.”Kieranstudiedmeclosely.“You’vebeenquiettoday.”
Iliftedashoulder.“There’sa
lottothinkabout.”
“Thereis,”heagreed.“ButI
knowwhatoneofthosethingsis.WhatyoudidinStonehill.”
Iopenedmymouththenclosed
it.Mymindkeptgettingstuckonalotofthings,butthat…Icouldn’tstop
thinkingaboutthatcoldspotspreadingthroughmybodywhenIsbethhadordered
themortalcoupleslaughtered.“Ilostcontrol,”Iwhispered.
“Butyoudidn’t.”
“OnlybecauseCasteelstopped
me.”
Kieranleanedin,hisheadlow.
“Isthatwhatyoureallythink?ThatCasoranyofuscouldreallystopyou?”
WhenIsaidnothing,hecurledhisfingersaroundmychin,liftingmygazeto
his.“Youstoppedyourself.Don’tforgetthat.”
Iwantedthattobetrue.Sodid
he.Thatdidn’tmakeittrue.“Anddon’tforgetwhatyoupromised.”
“IwishIcould,Poppy.”He
droppedhishand.“ButIcan’t.”
Mythroatburned.“I’msorry.”
“Iknow.”Heliftedhischin.
“Cascomes.”
IturnedasCasteelprowledout
fromthemassoftrees.He’dbeenscoutingthesurroundingareatoseeifthere
wereanysignsofCravennearby.
“Arewegoodhere?”Iasked.
“Asgoodaswecanbeanywhere,”
heansweredasKieranrose,stoppinglongenoughtotuggentlyonastrandof
myhair.Ididn’tevenwanttothinkaboutthemessmyhairhadtobein.
Casteelextendedhishand.“Come.Iwanttoshowyousomething.”
Iarchedabrowbuttookhis
hand.AsIstood,IsawthatKieranhadstoppedbyMalik,whowasbeingwatched
overbyReaver.
“Careful,”Casteeladvisedashe
ledmethroughthetrees.“TherewasnosignofCravenactivity,butthereare
alotofunripewalnutsscatteredabout.”
Lookingdown,Iwonderedexactly
howIwassupposedtoavoidthemsincethefloorofthewoodswasnothingbutshadows
ofgrassandrocks.“Whatareyoushowingme?”
“It’sasurprise.”
Wewalkeddeeperintothewoods
wherethelastraysofsunbarelypenetratedtheheavylimbs.Casliftedalow-hanging
branchoutoftheway.“Here.”Hetuggedmeforward.“Look.”
Ieasedpasthimandthetightly
packedtrees,dippingunderalimb.WhatIsawleftmespeechless.I
straightened,myeyeswide.Casteelhadbroughtmetotheedgeofthewalnut
treegrove,towheretheearthslopedsharplydownintoavalleyfullofstunning
shadesofblueandpurplesoakingupwhatremainedofthesun.Ariversnaked
amongthevividtrees,itswatersoclear,Iknewimmediatelythatitwasthe
RiverofRhain.
“TheWisteriaWoods,”Casteel
said,curlinganarmaroundmefrombehind.“TheyfollowtheroadtoPadonia
andallthewaytotheBloodForest.”
“Iforgotaboutthem.”Mygaze
liftedtowhereIcouldseecrimsonstainingthehorizon.“It’sbeautiful.”
“Magnificent,”hemurmured,and
whenIlookedovermyshoulder,Isawthathisattentionwasfixedonme.He
drewmeclosetohischest,andgods,I’dmissedthis.Thefeelofhim—hisbody
pressedsotightlytomine.Theconfidenceinhowhishandranupthesideof
mybody,andtheeaseinwhichIsankintohisembrace.“Ididthinkyou’dlike
theview,butIalsohadanulteriormotiveforleadingyouawayfromthe
group.”
Mymindimmediatelywenttovery,
veryinappropriateplaceswhenIthoughtaboutthoseulteriormotives.I
imaginedheneededtofeedagaintofullyrestorehisstrength.Somethingwhich
mybodyimmediatelygaveitsapprovalforwithaflushofheat.“Ulterior
motives?You?Never.”
Hislaughtouchedmycheek.“I
wantedtoseehowyouwereholdingup.Alotofunexpectednewswasjustdumped
onyou.”
Mybrowslifted.“Yourulteriormotive
isthatyouwantedtotalk?”
“Ofcourse.”Hispalmgrazedthe
curveofmybreast,causingmetogasp.“Whatelsecoulditbe?”
Ibitmylip.“I’mokay.”
Hishandmadeanotherslow,sweeping
passdownmyside.“RememberwhatyousaidtomeinStonehill?Isaidthat
first,Poppy.It’sokaynottobeokaywhenyou’rewithme.”
“Ihaven’tforgotten.”Myheart
swelledasIwatchedabreezestirtheheavystemsofthewisteriasbelow.
“Secretsandnewdiscoveriesaboutmyselfdon’treallyrattlemeliketheyused
to.”
“Idon’tknowifthatisagood
orabadthing.”
NeitherdidI.“Itjustis.But
I’m…I’mprocessingitall.”Iturnedmyheadtotheside.“Andyou?Howareyou
feeling?”
“I’mprocessingwhatallthose
tinyhooksinyourvestarekeepinghiddenfromme,”hesaid,slidinghishand
overmystomach.“AndthefactthatitwasIwhoclaspedthem.”
Ilaughed.“Thatisnotwhat
you’reprocessing.”
“Is,too.”Hisbreathteasedmy
lips.“AndI’malsoprocessingmyneedtoripmybrother’sthroatout.Ican
multitasklikethat.”
Myheartstuttered.“Cas—”
Hismouthtookmineashischest
rumbledagainstmyback,andthathand…itslidupovermybreastuntilthose
nimblefingers,histhumbandmiddle,foundthehardenedpeakthroughthethin
vestandblousebeneath.Hepinched.Nothard,justenoughtocausemyhipsto
twitchasaboltofwickedpleasuredartedfrommybreasts.“Idon’twantto
talkabouthim.Later,wecan.Justnotnow.”
Iwantedtoknowwhathewas
thinking,butIcouldtastethetartconflictandconfusionhefelt.So,Ilet
itgo—fornow.Ikissedhiminstead,andreceivedanotherteasingtugonmy
tingling,sensitiveflesh.
“I’malsothinkingabouthowamazing
youare,”hesaidwhenourmouthsparted.“You’reaforcetobereckonedwith,
Poppy.”
Thebuildingheatcooledasthat
coldplaceinsidemestirred,andtheeatherthrobbed.Iturnedmyheadbackto
thevalley.“I’msomething,allright.”
Hisfingerseasedfrommybreast.
“Whatisthatsupposedtomean?”
Iopenedmymouthbutcouldn’t
findthewordstodescribewhatitmeant.Itwasn’tlikeIdidn’thaveany
words.Ihadtoomany.“I…Iblewapartthathouse.”
“Youdid.”Hishandatmyhip
movedthen,slidingtowardmynavel.
“Idamagedotherhomes.”Myeyes
closedasthosefingersstartedtomoveovermybreast.“Icould’vekilled
innocentpeople.”
“Youcouldhave.”
Myheartlurched.
“Butyoudidn’t,”hesaidsoftly,
slippinghisrighthandpastmynavel.“Youknowthat.”
AllIknewwasthatIhadn’t
sensedanypainasweleftStonehill,butthatdidn’tmeanIhadn’tendedthe
lifeofsomeoneinnocent.Thatwaspossible.“Areyousure?”Iwhispered.
“Iam,”heassured.“Youdidn’t
hurtanyoneinnocent,Poppy.”
“Becauseyoustoppedme,”Iwhispered,
mylipspartingashequicklyundidtheclaspsonmybreeches.Theflapparted,
andthematerialloosened.“Casteel.”
“What?”
ThebreathItookhitchedashis
fingersslippedinsidethethinscrapofundergarmentsIwore.“Youknowwhat.”
“IknowIhadnothingtodowith
younotharminganyoneinnocent,”hecountered,dippingthosefingersbetween
mythighs.Myentirebodyjerkedasmyeyesflutteredopen.
Itwasstrange—theseriousness
oftheconversationandhowmybodyrespondednonethelesstotheteasingtouch.
Mystancewidened,givinghimmoreaccess.“Howdoyouknowthat?”
“Becauseifthatwerewhatyou
wanted?”Hisfingerdraggedovertheachingflesh.“Ifthatwasyourwill,you
would’veharmedthosemortalsbeforeIcouldstopyou.”Hesankafingerinto
myheat,wringinganothergaspfromme.“Youmadeaconsciousefforttostop.I
knowthatbecauseIknowhowtheessenceworks,Poppy.”
Istaredatthewisteriatrees
ashisfingermoved,slowlyinandout,nevergoingtoodeep.Myhipschased
thoseshallowplunges.Heatflowedthroughmyveins,easingtheknotof
coldnessthatpulsedneartheessence.Maybehewasright.WhenIsummonedthe
mist,mywillhadnotbeentocauseharm.Norhaditbeenwhenthewaveofrage
leftme.
Butwasthattruewhenitcame
totheexplosionofrage?
Ihadn’treallybeenthinkingat
all.I’djustbeenfurious.HadIgottenluckythen?
“Youunderstandthat,right?”
Casteel’sbreathwashotagainstmyneck.“Yourwill,asyousaid,isyours.”
Myheartbeatfasterashis
fingerthrustdeeper,andthepastelhuesofthewisteriatreesturneddarker.
“Yourwillisnotcontrolledby
aprophecy,”hecontinued,thesharpedgeofhisfangsgrazingmythroatand
sendingmypulseskittering.“YourwillisnotcontrolledbyaQueenoranyone
elsebutyou.”Heworkedanotherfingerin,andmykneesstiffenedasIrose
ontothetipsofmytoes.“Youarenotaharbingerofdeathanddestruction,
Poppy.You’reaharbingerofchangeandnewbeginnings.Tellmeyoubelievethat.”
“Yes,”Ipanted.“Ido.”
Casteel’sheadtilted,andthe
pierceofhisfangsinthewoundhe’dcreatedbeforestunnedme.Mymuscles
tightened,andmythighsclampedaroundhishandasthefierystingtraveled
throughme,quicklyfollowedbyaroarofacutepleasureashismouthclosed
overthereopenedmarks,andhedrank.
Shuddering,myeyesfellshutas
hedrankfromme—tookmybloodandtookmewithhisfingers,asthatinsidious
voiceinthebackofmymindscoldedme.IwantedsobadlytotellhimthatI
believedwhathe’dsaidasstronglyasbothheandKierandid.So,thatwaswhat
I’ddone.I’dlied.Iliedtohim,andIdidn’tlikeit.Didn’tlikehowit
mademefeel.AndIdidn’tlikethatI’dmadeKieranpromisewhathecould
neversharewithCasteel.Buthistouch—thosefingersandhismouth—chasedaway
morethanthecoldness.ItcrowdedouttheguiltasIrodeCas’sfingers,
rockingagainsthispalmandthehardnesspressingagainstmylowerback.With
mysensesopen,thesmokyflavorofhislustandthesweetnessofhislove
drovemetoarippling,suddenreleasethathewiselysilencedwithhishand.
Iwasstilltremblingwhenhis
fingerseasedfromme,andhetookonelast,draggingpullfrommythroat.Hisarm
loosenedatmywaistasheliftedhishand.Iturnedhalfway,haltingwhen
heated,goldeneyesmetmine.Mybreathcaughtashisblood-tingedlipsclosed
overhisslickfingers.
“Idon’tknowwhichpartofyoutastes
better,”hemurmured.
Mybodyflushedhot.“You
are…youaresoverybad.”
Hegrinneddownatmebutitwas
lostinastarkpulseofneedasIreachedforhisbreeches.Hesaidnothing,
simplywatchedmeintentlyasIundidtheflap,tuggingthebreechesdownhis
leanhips.HisbodyjerkedasIcurledmyfingersaroundhiscock,andhe
groanedasIwenttomyknees.
“Who’sthebadone?”heasked,
hisvoicethickandwonderfullyrough.
“You.”Idrewmyhanduphis
length.“Andyou’reabadinfluence.”
Hishandcurledaroundtheback
ofmyheadashedrewmeinuntilmylipsbrushedhistip.“I’vetoldyoubefore,
Poppy.Onlythebadcanbeinfluenced.”
Igrinnedupathim,enjoying
thesestolenmomentswherenothingexistedbutus.“IreadsomethinginWilla’s
journal.”
“Ibetyoureadallkindsof
thingsinherjournal,”hereplied,fingerstanglinginmyhair.“Butwhatare
youthinkingofnow?”
“Shewrotethatthevein…this
vein—”Isaid,draggingmythumbacrossit.Hegroaned.“Canbeextraordinarily
sensitive.Isthattrue?”
“Canbe.”Hischestrosesharply.
“Shealsoclaimedthatitwas
evenmoresensitivetothetongue,”Isaid,myfacewarming.
“Whydon’tyouassuagethat
curiosityofyoursandfindout?”Hepaused.“Forresearchpurposes.”
Ilaughedandthenfoundoutas
Idraggedmytonguealongthatthickvein.Willahadbeencorrect.Itwasa
sensitivespot.LiquidhadalreadybegunbeadingontheheadofhiscockwhenI
closedmymouthoverhim.IdrewhiminasdeeplyasIcouldanddidn’tworry
aboutwhatIwasdoingbecauseIknewhelovedit.Thewayhishandtightened
onthebackofmyheadtoldmethat.Asdidthethrustsofhishipsandthespicy
tastethatjoinedtheearthyflavorofhisskin.
“Youknow,Ithink…”He
shudderedashegatheredthestrandsofmyhairawayfrommyfacewithhis
otherhand.“Ithinkyoureallylikemycockinyourmouth,”hesaid,andI
suckedharder.Hegroaned.“IalsothinkyoulikeitwhenIsayinappropriate
thingslikethat.”
Myfaceheatedevenmorebecause
Ireallydid.
“MyQueenisavery—”Hiscursewas
sharp,andtherhythmofhishipspickedup.“Fuck.”
Casteeldidn’ttrytopullaway.
Thistime,heheldmethereashecame,hisentirebodyshakingastherelease
tookhim.Whenhistremorssubsided,Ikissedtheundersideofhiscockandthen
thefadedbrandonhishipbeforeredoinghisbreeches.Hishandsslippedtomy
shoulders,buthedidn’tdrawmetomyfeet.Instead,hejoinedmeonthe
ground,pullingmeintohislapandagainsthischest.Wewerebothstill
breathingalittlefastasheredidtheclasponmybreeches.
“Thereissomethingelseweneed
totalkabout,”hesaidashestraightenedtheedgeofmyvest.
Myheadwasnestledunderhis
chinasIwatchedthemoonrise.Weprobablyhadalonglistofthingswe
neededtodiscuss,butIsuspectedIknewwhatwasthemostpressing.“The
Joining?”
Hefoldedhisarmsaroundme.“What
areyouthinking?”
Alot.Inthosequietmomentsthat
followed,asthemooncontinueditsnightlyclimb,Iwasthinkingalot.“I
can’tbringwolvenback,”Isaidfinally,unsureifIhadtoldhimthatwhen
I’dbathedhimatStonehill.“Ordraken.Ican’tbringbackanybeingoftwo
worlds.”
Casteelsaidnothing.
“AndKieran…hewasokaywith
that,eventhoughitterrifiedme.Losinghim.”Shuddering,Iclosedmyeyes
anddrewinastaggered,too-shortbreath.“Icanbarelyeventhinkit.”
“Don’t.”Casteel’sfingertipsgrazed
mycheekashetiltedmychinupandback.Iopenedmyeyes.“You’renotgoing
toloseKieran.”
“Iwanttobelievethat.”Iturned
myhead,kissingthepalmofhisinjuredhand.“Iwanttobelievethatwe’llfind
Malec,andthatIsbethwon’tbetrayus.Thatwe’lltakeCarsodoniaandsuffer
nolosses.Thatwewillsurvivethis,andeveryonewecareaboutwill,too.But
that’safairy-taleending.Aperfectonethatmostlikelywon’tbecome
reality.”
Casteeltracedthelinesofmy
face,andforamoment,Isoakedupthefeelofhistouch,lettingtherebe
nothingbutthat.“Wecanmakeittheclosestthingtoreality.”
“WiththeJoining,”Iwhispered.
Hisgazereturnedtomineashe
nodded.“Itwon’tprotecteveryone.”
Mychestached.“IfIcouldJoin
withallthoseIcareabout,asawkwardasthatwouldbe,”Isaid,andCasteel
gavemeahalf-grin,“Iwould.ButIdon’tthinkitworksthatway,doesit?”
“Idon’tthinkso.”
Isighed.“ButitwillofferKieran
andyouabetterlevelofprotection.Right?Itcouldsupersedethiscurse.”
“Right.”Hemovedhisthumbtomy
lowerlip.“Wewouldliveaslongasyou.Thewayyouage,howeverthatwill
be,willalsobethewayweage.”Heloweredhishead,kissingme.“Butit’sa
bigdecision,Poppy.Itwillnotjustbeyourlifethatyoubeartheweightof.
ItwillbemineandKieran’s.”
“ButastheQueen,don’tI
alreadybeartheweightofthelivesofallourpeople?”Iasked.“Don’tyou?”
Afaintsmileappearedasthesweet
andrich,clove-ytasteofcinnamonreachedme.Love.Pride.Ikissedhis
thumb.“Youdo.Webothdo.Butthisisdifferent.”Withhisotherhand,he
tuckedseveralstrandsofmyhairbackbehindmyear.“TheJoiningcanbe
intense.”
Warmthcreptupmythroat.“I
know.”
“Evenifitdoesn’tbecome
somethingsexual,thesheerintimacyoftheactgoesbeyondthat.”
Iswallowed.“Whatdoesit
actuallyentail?”Iasked,unsurethatwhatlittleAlastirhadsaidwastrue.
“Ithastobeunderthemoon,
amongnature.Idon’tknowwhy,butthat’sapartoftheunknownwhenitcomes
tohowitworks.There’sa…magicalqualitytoitthatgoesbeyondblood.There
havebeenrumorsofitnotworkinginthepast—liketheintentionstodoit
werenotgenuineorsomething,”heshared.“Butotherthanthatunknownpart,
therecanbenothingbetweenus.And,yes,bynothing,Imean
clothing.”
Myfacebegantowarmevenmore.
“Oh.”
“Allofuswouldhavetobebare
andopentooneanother.TotheelementsandtotheFates,”heexplained,andI
resistedtheurgetorollmyeyesatthementionoftheArae.“Wemustremain
incontactwithoneanotherthroughouttheentireritual.”
“Andwewoulddrinkfromone
another?”
“Youwouldfeedfromusfirst.”
Hisfingersdroppedtotheskinbelowthesensitivebiteonthesideofmyneck
ashewentintomoredetail.Itwasalot,andmybodyalreadyfeltasifit
wereasredastheBloodForest.“Youcanseehowthingscan…escalateinto
more.”
Oh,didIever.“Idon’tknow
howtheycouldn’t,”Iadmitted.
“Theydon’tifyoudon’twant
themto,”hetoldme.“Andifitdoesbecomesomethingyouneed,thenitdoes.
Nothingthatyou’renotcomfortablewithwouldevertranspire.Iwouldn’tallow
it.NeitherwouldKieran.It’sassimpleasthat.”
Wasitreally?Itwistedinhis
lap,lookingathimstraighton.“Andifitdid…becomemore?Whatwouldhappen
afterward?Betweenus?”
Hisheadtiltedashiseyes
searchedmine.“Youloveme,right?”
“Yes.”
“Iloveyou,”hesaid,
flatteninghispalmagainstmycheek.“AndyouloveKieran.”
Ijolted,mystomachdipping.
“I…”Ididn’tknowhowtoanswerthat.
“Ilovehim,”Casteelsaidin
thesilence.“Thoughnotinthesameway.NotasIfeelforyou.BecausewhatI
feelforyou…noonehaseverownedthatbefore.Nooneeverwill.”
Mythroatdried.Hedidn’thave
totellmethat.Ialreadyknewit.“Kieran…hemeansalottome.”
“Youmeanalottohim.”
Aburnfilledmyeyesforsomesilly
reasonasIstaredatCasteel’sthroat.“Idon’tknowhowtoexplainwhatI
feel.BecauseIdon’tunderstandit.”
“Igetit,”hesaid,andI
reallythoughthedid.“There’smore.”
Iblinkedawaytearsandpeeked
upathim.“There’smoretotakeintoconsideration.Really?”
Henodded.“Webothhavetobe
preparedthatthismaynotbetheonlyJoining.IfKieranweretofindsomeone,
hemaywanttojointheirlifetoyours.You’dhavetogothroughtheJoiningagain.”
“Sohewouldn’toutlivethem.”I
exhaledslowly.“Iwouldn’twanthimtofacethat.IwoulddotheJoiningagain
ifthatwaswhathewanted.”
“No.Youwouldn’tallowhimto
gothroughthat.”Casteeldraggedhishandthroughmyhair,pressinghislips
tomytemple.
“AndwhatdoyouthinkKieran
wants?”Iasked.“Wouldhewanttodothis?”
Casteelstaredatmeforwhat
feltlikeafullminute.“Honestly?”
“Ofcourse.”
“Beforeyoucameintothepicture,
Kieranwould’veagreedsimplybecauseitwould’vebeensomethingIrequested.
Notbecausetherewasabond,butbecausehewoulddoanythingforme.Just
likeIwoulddoanythingforhim.Butnow?Hewoulddoitforyou.”
Ifrowned.“Butwe’redoingit
forhim.”
“Andformeinaroundaboutway,
buthe’ddoitifthat’swhatyouwanted,”heinsisted.
Mystomachandchestfluttered
asifadozenbirdsweretakingflightallatonce.“Andifwedecidetodo
this,whenwouldithappen?”
“Knowingyou,you’llprobably
wanttodoitassoonaspossible.”Hekissedmyforehead.“ButIthinkwe
shouldwaituntilafterwegointotheBloodForestandreturntoPadonia—”
“But—”
“Thisisabigchoicetomake,
Poppy.Onethatcan’tbeundone.Youmaynotthinkyouneedthetimetomakesure,
andmaybeyoudon’t,butIstillwantyoutohavethattime.”
“Youdon’tneedthattime,
though.Youknowwhatyouwant.”
Hebrushedseveralstrandsof
hairbackfrommyface.“Ido,butthat’sbecauseIgrewupknowingwhatthe
Joiningisandeverythingitentails.Thisissomethingnewtoyou.”
Iappreciatedthethoughtfulness
behindmakingsurethatIdidn’tchangemymind.Thiswasabigdeal,
andtherewasalsothechancethatifwedidtheJoining,itwouldn’tprotectKieran
againstthePrimalcurse.Evenknowingthat,thechancethatitwould
wasmoreimportant.TheJoiningcouldalsoprotectKieranandCasteelinthe
battlestocome.
Italsomeantneverhavingto
saygoodbyetoeitherofthem.
Butitwasalsomorethanall
that.ItwasalsotheknowledgethatifKieraneverhadtohonorthepromise
he’dmadetome,andImisjudgedwhatCasteelwoulddo,hewouldn’tbeabletotrulyharmKieran.BothwouldremainsafeifIwereentombed.
MeetingCasteel’sgaze,Idrewin
adeepbreath.“Iwilltakethetime,butIknowmyanswerwon’tchange.Iwant
todotheJoining.”
Chapter38
Casteel
IsatquietlybesidePoppyasshesleptunderthewalnut
tree,havingfallenasleepmeremomentsafterplacinghercheekonmyrolled
cloak.Ididn’twanttodisturbher,butIalsocouldn’tstopmyselffrom
touchingher.ItwasasifIwereundersomesortofcompulsion.I’dreadjusted
thecloakdrapedoverherhalfadozentimes.I’dtoyedwithherhair,smoothing
thewispystrandsthathadfallenonhercheek,andthenwaitedhopefullyfor
thebreezetoundomyworksoIhadagoodreasonfortouchingheragain.
Itwasallridiculous.Perhaps
evenabitobsessive,butthecontactwasgrounding,especiallyinthedarkand
quiet.MyhandshookslightlyasIpulledthecloakuptohershoulder.The
contactstoppedtheloomingandpanickedfearthatdrovemymindbacktothat
cell.
Draggingmygazefromher,Ilooked
overtowhereMalikwaschainedtooneofthetrees.Hischinwasdownagainst
hischest,butIknewhewasawake.
AndIwaswillingtobetthathe
wasplottinghisescape.
Ididn’tknowwhattothinkwhen
itcametoMalik,butonethingwasclear.Hewasn’tloyaltoIsbeth.Itwasn’t
theBloodQueenhesoughttoreturnto.
Itwashisheartmate.
Still,Ididn’tthinkIcould
everforgivehim.
Iwasn’tevensureIcould
forgivemyparentsfortheirlies.
Kierandriftedoutofthenight,
comingtomyside.Hecrouchedbesideme,hisvoicelow.“I’llwatchoverher.”
Thefistofemotionclenched.“I
don’tknowifIwanttospeaktohim.”
KieraneyedMalik,hisjaw
tense.“Youdon’twantto,butyouneedto,andyoushould.”
“Wasthatsupposedtobewiseadvice?”
“Someonehastoimpartwisdom
aroundhere.”
Ismirked,lettingmyhandfall
frommymouth.“Hopefully,wefindapersontotakeonthatrole.”
Kieranchuckledquietlyashe
glancedatPoppy.“Youknow,sheneversleptlikethiswhenyouweregone.She
hardlysleptatall.Andwhenshedid,thereweralmostalwaysnightmares.I
thinkthat’swhyshesleepssodeeplynow.Herbodyistryingtomakeupfor
theloss.”
Iclosedmyeyes.
Hearingallofthat…Fuck,it
wasakicktotheheart.Ireachedover,myfingersgrazinghercheekjustsoI
couldfeelher.“IfIcouldtakebackanypainshesuffered,Iwould.”
“Butyouwouldn’tchangeathing
youdid.”
“No.”
Heletoutaheavysigh.“WhatReaver
saidearlier…”
Iturnedmyheadtohim,afaint
sliverofmoonlightcuttingacrosshischeekandoneeye.“TheJoining?”
Kierannodded.“Reaverwasn’t
evensureifitwouldblockaPrimalcurse.”
“Itcould,though.”
Alongmomentpassedashestared
downatPoppy.“Idon’twanteitherofyoutofeellikeyouhavetodothatfor
me.We’llfindMalec,andthenwe’llkillthatbitch.”
Istudiedhim.Thelineofhis
jawwashard.Set.Determined.I’dseenthatexpressionathousandtimes.Like
whenweleftforSolistofindtheMaiden.Hehadn’tbeenonboardwiththeidea,
buthe’dstoodbesidemetheentiretime.AsresolvedthenashewaswhenI’d
orderedhimtoremaininAtlantiawhileIwentonmyidioticquesttokillthe
BloodQueenandKingallthoseyearsago.Iknewtheslightriseofhislips
meantthathewasreluctantlyamused,somethingI’dseenalotofwhenhewas
firstaroundPoppy.Iknewwhathelookedlikewhenhewasfuriousandwhen
he’dbeenrippedapartbygrief.I’dseenhimgoutterlycold.Empty.Iknew
hisfacewellenoughtoknowwhenhelookeduponsomeonehecareddeeplyabout.
Thosefine,barelynoticeablelinesoftensionaroundhismouthdisappeared.
Kieransoftened.He’ddonethatwhenhelookedatElashya—wheneverhe
spokeofher.HesoftenedinalmostthesamewaynowwhenhelookeduponPoppy.
Ireachedover,claspinghis
shoulder.“Wearenotbrothersofthesameblood.Wearenotfriendsdueto
somebond,”Itoldhim,andhisgazemetmine.“Wearenotloyaltoeachother
becauseofcourtesyortraditionortitle.Wehavealwaysbeenaboveallthat.
And,inalotofways,we’retwohalvesofthesamewhole.DifferentthanPoppy
andme,butnotthatmuchdifferent.Youknowthat.”
Kieranclosedhiseyes.
“PoppyandIhavespokenabout
it.”
“Ifiguredthat’swhatyouwere
offdoing.”Hepaused.“Well,oneofthethingsIfiguredyoutwowere
offdoing.”
IgrinnedasIwatchedhim.
“WhenitcomestotheJoining,it’snotbecausewefeelasifweneedto.It’s
becausewewantto,”Itoldhim.“It’sforyouasmuchasitwillbeforus.”
Kieranswallowedagain.“Ijust
wantedyoutoknow—wantedhertoknow—thatIdon’texpectit.”
“Webothknowthat.”
Heclearedhisthroat.“So,youdid
talkaboutit?”
“Wedid.”Isqueezedhis
shoulder.“Andyouknowwhatouransweris—whatshedecided.”
“Ido.”Kieran’seyesopened.
“Andhowdoyoufeelaboutthat?”
“YouknowhowIfeelaboutit.”
Agrinappeared.“Intrigued?”
“I’malwaysinastateofconstant
intriguewhenitcomestoher,”Iadmitted.
“Yeah,”hebreathed,looking
downather.“Ibetshehadsomanyquestions.”
Igrinned.“Allvalidonesyou
probablysecretlywishedshe’daskedyousoyoucouldfeeluseful.”
Kieranlaughedunderhisbreath.
“Yeah,Ido.”
“Iwantedhertotakethetime
tomakesurethisiswhatshewants,”Itoldhim,andhenodded.“Ifshestill
wantstodotheJoining,we’lldoitwhenwereturnfromtheBloodForest.”
“That’sgood.Iwanthertobesure.”
Hisgazeflickedtome.“Gotalk
toyourbrother.She’llbefinewithme.”
“Iknow.”Givinghisshoulder
onelastsqueeze,Iroseandleft.WhenIlookedback,Kieranhadtakenmy
placebesideher,watchfulandalert,andthatwarmedmychest.
Imademywayacrossthesmall
clearing.Malikshowednoawarenessofmyapproach,buthewasaware.
AllthoseuglyemotionscrowdedmychestasIkneltinfrontofhim.Isaid
nothing.Neitherdidheforseveralmoments.Whenhedidspeak,Ifuckingwished
hehadn’t.
“Youhateme.”
Jawclenching,Itwistedmyneck
fromsidetoside.DidI?Yes.No.
“Wouldn’tblameyouifyoudid.”
Hestretchedoutaleg.“Iknowyoulookedformethiswholetime.Iheardwhat
theDescenterscalledyou.TheDarkOne—”
“ExceptyouweretheonlyDark
Onethatevermattered.”
Hisshoulderstensedashe
continued.“Ididn’twantyoutolookforme.Iwantedyoutogiveuponit.
Prayedthatyoudid.AndIkeptthinkingyouwouldhearaboutme—aboutaman
calledElian,whowasoftenseenatWayfair.Thatyouwouldknow,wouldassume,
thatI’dbetrayedyouandwouldgiveup.Youdidn’t.Should’veknownbetter.
Youwerealwaysastubbornbrat—”
“Idon’tgiveafuckaboutany
ofthat.Youdon’tevenwanttoknowwhatIwoulddoforPoppy,soIgetit.You
diditforyourheartmate.”Themomentthewordswerespoken,Ibreathed
howgodsdamntruetheywere.“It’swhatIdidtoPoppytofreeyou.Iliedto
her.Betrayedher.And,yeah,that’sonme.SomethingI’vegottoworkout.But
it’salsowhatyoudidtoherthatIcannotfathom,nomatterwhatyoubelieved
shewoulddoasanadult.Shewasachild.Andyou—whoabhorredviolenceofany
kind—neverwould’veevenconsideredharmingachild.”
Maliksaidnothing.
Thatuglyfistofemotion
clenchedtighter.“Itdoesn’tmatterthatyouweren’tabletofollowthroughon
it.Shegothurtbecauseofyou,Malik.Bad.”
“Iknow,”hesaidinaragged
wayasifithurthimtoadmitit.Iwantedtohurthimforeven
acknowledgingit.
“Doyou?Doyouknowthescars
thatnonecansee?Howtheyrunsodamndeepinher?Youractionstormentedher
foryears.”Iloweredmyselfontooneknee,plantingahandinthecoolgrass
tostopmyselffromplantingitinhisface.“Youlefthertheretodie.”
Malik’sheadliftedthen.Identical
eyesmetmine.“Ididn’t.ShetriedtotellyouthatbackinStonehill.Howdo
youthinkshesurvivedthatnight?Primalgodornot,shehadn’tenteredher
Cullingyet.”Heleanedforwardasfarasthechainwouldallow.“Youknowthat
meansshewould’vediedifleftthere.Noneoftheotherswhosurvivedthe
nightwould’vebeenabletogetheroutofthere.Idid.Itookherbackto
Carsodonia,andthatfucking—”Atremorcoursedthroughhim,andhislaughwas
low.Harsh.“Ididn’tleaveherthere.”
Istaredathim.Poppyhadsaid
thathe’dgottenheroutofLockswood.He’dspokenthetruth.Butdiditmatter?
“Isthatsupposedtoredeemyousomehow?”
“Fuck,no.Becauseyou’reright.
Iwasthecauseofthosescars—hiddenornot.”Malikslumpedagainstthetree.
“IsawPenellaphe.Notoften.Isbethkeptherawayfrommost,butIsawher
beforetheyplacedherinthatveil.Isawwhatmyactionshaddone.Andtrust
mewhenIsayitshouldbringyoualittlepeacetonothaveseentheaftermath
whenitwassonew.”
Iroseswiftlyandtookasteptoward
him,stoppingshortwhenIsawKierandothesameacrosstheclearing.Iturned
awayfrommybrother,dragginginthecoolnightairuntilitdampenedsomeof
therage.
“DidAlastirevertellanyone
thathesawme?”
Iturnedtohim.
“Becausehedid.”
Holyfuck.“No.”
Malik’seyesclosed.“Hesawand
recognizedme.Idon’tknowifIshouldfeelrelievedornotthathekeptthat
tohimself.”
Buthadhe?Orwasthat
somethingelseourparentshadliedabout?Wasthatwhythey’dbelievedMalik
gonetothem?ToAtlantia?Whythey’dpushedsohardformetotakethethrone?
“Thatnight,whenIlookedinto
Penellaphe’seyesandsawtheConsort,IbelievedCorathen.Youknow,thatshe
wasright,”hesaidafteramoment.“ThatPenellaphewouldendtheBloodCrown.
Butovertheyears,Irealizedthatitdidn’tmatterwhoPenellaphewasinher
heart.AllthatmatteredwaswhetherIsbethfoundawaytoexploitherpower.”
Hiseyesopened.“Andyouknowshewill.YousawitatStonehill.InOak
Ambler.Isbethstokesheranger,andPoppyrespondswithrage.”
“Shutup.”
“Andwhenshecompletesher
Culling,itwon’tberagesherespondswith.Itwillbedeath.Itwillbe
exactlywhatIsbethiscountingon.Something—”
Ishotforward,closingmyhand
aroundMalik’sthroat.“Poppywillneverdestroyakingdom,letalonearealm.
NomatterwhatIsbethdoes,”Itoldhim,awarethatKieranhadrisenagainbut
remainedatPoppy’sside.“She,unlikehermotherandme,isableto
controlheranger.”
“DoyouknowhowbadlyIwantto
believethat?”Hisvoicebroke.
IwentcoldasIheldhisgaze.
“Ifyoueventhinkofharminghernow,IsweartothegodsIwilltearyou
apart,limbfromlimb.”
“IfIwantedtotrysomething,I
would’vemadeamovewhenshewasyoungerandreturnedtoWayfair,”hebitout.
“Ihaven’t.NeitherhasMillicent.”
“Yeah,that’sright.Millicent
saidithadtobemeonceshefinishestheCulling.”
“Andthatwasn’teasyforherto
saytoyou.”
“Shedidn’tappeartostruggle
thatmuchwiththewords.”
“Milliedoesn’tknowhersister,
butshewouldn’tchoosethatkindofendforher.She’sjusttryingtoprotect
thepeople.”Heheldmystare.“AndIhatethatyouevenhadtohearthat.I
do.Tocarrythatkindofknowledge…thatitwillsoononlybeyouwhocanstop
her.”
“Don’tfeeltoobadlyforme,
brother.”Idugmyfingersintohiswindpipejustenoughtocausehimtoflinch.
“ForIwon’tloseonesecondofsleeptoitbecauseIwouldneverdosucha
thing,norwouldshegivemeareasonto.”
“Andifyou’rewrong?”heforced
out.
“I’mnot.”Iletgoofhis
throatandbackedoffbeforeIdidsomethingImightregret.“We’regoingto
findMalec.We’regoingtobringhimtoIsbeth.”
“Butwhatthedrakensaidabout
theJoining—”
“Wehaven’tdoneit.”Istaredup
atthesky,unsureofwhyI’devenadmittedthat.
“Fuck.Forreal?You’remarried
toyourheartmateandhaven’tJoined?You?Kieran?Hell…”Alittleoftheold
MalikIknewslippedinthen.“Ijustassumedyouhad.Apparently,sodidthe
draken.”Hepaused.“Willyou?ItmightnotworkagainstaPrimalcurse,but—”
“That’snoneofyourfucking
business.But,Joinedornot,Iwon’triskit.”Ifacedhim.“Neitherwill
Poppy.”
MalikglancedoveratKieran.He
hadreturnedtoPoppy’sside,sittinginawaythathadhimbentoverhalfher
bodyasifhewereshieldingher.“Yousureyouaren’tJoined?”
“Yes,”Isaidwryly.“Positive.”
“Huh,”hemurmured.
SeverallongmomentspassedasI
stareddownathim.“Whydidn’tyouevertrytotakeherlifeagainwhenshewas
youngandvulnerable?”Iasked,eventhoughIwasn’tsureIshouldknow.
BecauseasI’dsaid,PoppywasfarbetteratcontrollingherangerthanIwas.
“Whydidn’tMillicentifshetoobelievedintheprophecy?”
Malikgaveanothershakeofhis
head.“That’shersister.Milliecouldn’tdoit.Didn’tmatterthatPenellaphe
wasneversupposedtoknowabouther.”
“Andyou?Youstoppedbelieving
inwhatCorasaid.”
“I…Ijustcouldn’tdoit.Andby
thetimeshewasoldenoughthatInolongersawherasachild,theysenther
toMasadonia,”hesaid,hiseyesthinslits.“Andbytheend,I’dheardofthe
DarkOne.You.AndIfigured…”
Itensed.“Youfiguredwhat?”
“Thatyouwouldkillhertoget
backattheBloodQueen.”
Cursingundermybreath,I
lookedaway.TherewasabrieftimewhenIwould’vedonejustthat.BeforeImet
Poppy.WhenIknewheronlyastheMaiden.Thosebriefmoments,though,fucked
withmyhead,evennow.
Idraggedahandovermyface.I
stilldidn’tknowifMalikhavingachangeofheartmattered.Orifitever
would.Ikneltoncemore.“DoyouordoyounotwanttodefeatIsbethandthe
BloodCrown?”
Malik’seyeshardenedintochips
ofamber.“Iwanttoseethemburn.”
“WhataboutMillicent?”Iasked.
“Shewantsthesame.”Hisgazefell
towherePoppysleptandthenreturnedtomine.“Shewantstobefreeofhermother.
Tofinallybeabletolive.”
“Ifthat’swhatyoureallywant,
youwon’trunbacktothecapitalandgetyourselfkilled.You’llfightbeside
us.You’llhelpusfindMalecandthenkillIsbeth.Youwillhelpusendthis.”
“Iwillhelpyou,”Maliksaid.“Iwon’ttrytoescape.”
Itookthatin,wantingtobelieve
whatheclaimedasbadlyashewantedtobelievewhatIsaidaboutPoppy.Problem
was,thatfaithwasn’tgainedbywords.Faithwasearnedbyactions.“There’s
somethingelseIneedtoknowaboutthatnightinLockswood.Whatinthehell
wasupwiththatrhyme?”
“What?”Hefrowned.“What
rhyme?”
“Theprettypoppyone.Pickit
andwatchitbleed.”Isearchedhisfeatures.
“Ifthat’sarhyme,itsoundsabout
fivelevelsoffuckedup,”Maliksaid.“ButIhavenoideawhatyou’retalking
about.I’veneverevenheardanythinglikethat.”
ThebattlementsoftheRisesurroundingPadoniacame
intoviewaswecrestedtherockyhillthefollowingmorning.Anticipationand
resolveroseswiftly,asdidabitofawe.TheWisteriaWoodsI’dseenthe
nightbeforenowcrowdedtheearthenroadandthecityofPadoniaitself,their
trailinglimbsofvaryingshadesofblueandpurplegivingwaytothedeep
crimsonoftheouteredgesoftheBloodForest.
Poppywasclearlytakenwiththe
beauty,hergazecrawlingovereveryinchofthelandscape.Ihopedithelped
herforgetthatwe’dpassedtheroadtoLockswoodnomorethananhourago.Her
shouldershadn’trelaxeduntilthewisteriasbecamemorevisible.Still,she’d
beenquietmostofthemorning.
Shiftinginthesaddle,Iglanced
overatMalik.Betweenourconversationlastnightandtheupcomingreunion
withourfather,IwascaughtupinmyheadandhopingtothegodsthatI
wasn’tmakingahuge-assmistakebyremovingthebonechainfromhiswristsand
allowinghimtoridefreely.
Ijusthadn’twantedourarmies’
firstsightoftheirPrincetobeoneofhiminchains.
Poppyfoldedahandoverthearm
I’dencircledherwaistwithassheturnedtotheside,lookingup.“Areyou
okay?”
“Notsure,”Iadmitted,glancing
downather.“BeenthinkingaboutwhatI’mgoingtosaytomyfather.”
“Whathaveyoucomeupwith?”
“Nothingthat’ssuitablefor
repeating,”Isaidwithadrylaugh.
Sheglancedforwardasthebridge
overtheRiverofRhainbecamevisiblethroughthetwiningvinesofbluish-purple.
“Wecandelaythisifyouneedmoretime.”
“Wedon’tneedtodothat.”I
kissedthetopofherhead.“It’sbestifIgetthisoverwith.”
Thetopsofmanyofthetentsbecame
visible,anditlookedasifthebulkofthearmieshadcampedoutsidethe
Rise.Ariskymove,butonethathadmostlikelybeendecidedinfavorofnot
destroyingthefieldsinside.
Fromthetown,alow,rumbling
roargainedourattention.IslowedthehorseasKieranstoppedalongsideus,the
soundofhoovesandpawsreachingourears.“We’reabouttohavecompany.”I
squeezedherhipsandthendismounted.Ireachedforher,andsheplacedher
handinminewithoutquestionorhesitation.Thehorsewerodewasonlynow
gettingusedtoKieraninhiswolvenform,andIhadafeelingwewereaboutto
beswampedbymanymore.Ididn’twanthimthrowingPoppy.
Herlipspursed.“Istillcannot
believeIdon’thavebetterhearingorvision.Ridiculous.”
“Orshiftintoanything,”I
remindedherasthenoisegrewlouder,closer.
“That,too.”
“You’reperfectasyouare.”I
bent,kissingthecornerofhermouth.“Averagehearingandall.”
“Thatwascorny,”shesaid,grinning
asshepeeredatmethroughafringeoflasheswiththosefractured
green-and-silvereyes.“Butcute.”
Awhitewolfwasthefirsttoburst
throughthewisteriavines,racingstraighttowardus.Therewasnostoppingmy
smileasDelanoallbutlaunchedhimselfinmydirection.
“Oh,dear,”Poppymurmured,
calmingthenervoushorse.
Icaughtthedamnwolven,laughing
asIstumbledback.Delanowasn’tthelargestwolvenbyanymeans,buthewas
stillheavyasanoxandstrongasone,too.Iendedupononekneeandtried
to—well,calmthefurry,wigglingmassthatwasDelanoashepressedhisheadinto
mine.
“Missedyou,myman.”Claspingthe
sidesofhishead,Iheldhimtightlyuntilafawn-coloredwolvenidenticalto
Kieranbutsmallerinweightandheightnudgedhimoutoftheway.
MychestwarmedasIembraced
Netta.Shewasalittlelesssedateinhereagerness,onlynearlytopplingme
onmyassonce.“Missedyou,too.”
“Whataboutme?”cameadrawl.
Ismoothedahandoverthetop
ofNetta’sheadasIsaid,“Didn’tthinkaboutyouonce,Emil.”
“Ouch,”theAtlantiansaidwith
alaugh,andtheninasoftervoice,Iheardhimsay,“Iknewyouwouldget
him.”
Lookingup,Isawtheauburn-haired
bastardtakePoppy’shandinhisandholdittothegoldandsteelarmor
adorninghischest.Foronce,Ididn’twanttopunchhisthroatthroughhis
spine.Onlybecausetheadorationinhisstarewasthatofrespect.
Andbecausehereleasedherhand
quickly
Otherwolvensurroundedme,and
Igaveup,remainingonmykneeastheyeachcametoeitherbrushagainstmeor
pushtheirheadagainstmine.Igladlywaited.Forawolventodosuchathing
wasasignofrespect,andIwashonoredtobeonthereceivingend.
WhenIwasfinallyabletorise,
anotheremotionrockedme.ItwasseeingPoppygreetedinthesameway—watching
herturntoburyherfaceinthefurofDelano’sneckandthenholdNetta
tightlytoher.Hearingherlaughterasthewolvenpressedintoher.Her
acceptanceofthem—thatshiningloveinherbrighteyes—andtheirclearworship
ofherdidsomethingtomychestandmyfuckingeyes.
Thatwasmywife
Myheartmate.
Godsdamn.
Clearingmythroat,Ilookedat
thetallAtlantianstandingbeforeme.
“Heldback,”Naillsaidthickly.
“Didn’twanttogettrampled.”
Laughing,Iclosedthedistance
betweenus,embracinghim.“Goodtoseeyou.”
“Asitistoseeyou.”Hisarm
hungaroundmyshoulders.“Hasn’tbeenrightwithoutyou.”
Iblewoutaraggedbreath.“But
I’mbacknow.”
“Iknowyouare.Justdon’t
leaveusagain.”
“Don’tplanonit.”
Naillgavemeonelastsqueeze
beforesteppingback.Hecaughtmyleftwrist.Theglancewasbrief,buthis
ambereyesturnedhard.“We’regoingtomakethempayforthis.”
“Weare.”Iclaspedourhands
withmyother.
WhenNaillmovedtotheside,
Perryquicklyreplacedhimandpulledmeinforaone-armedembrace.Thearmor
heworedugintomychest,butIdidn’tcare.Neitherofusspokeforalongmoment,
andthenhesaidroughly,“Youlookgood.”
“Feelingthatway,”Itoldhim.
“You’vebeenkeepinganeyeonDelano?”
“Always.It’slikea
twenty-four-hourassignment.”Perrylaughed,leaningback,hisambereyes
shining.“NotoncedidanyofusdoubtthatKieranandourQueenwouldfindyou.
Notforonedamnsecond.”
Mythroatthickened.“Neither
didI.”
Exhalingslowly,Perrystepped
backandfinallylookedtowhereMalikstood.Thearmaroundmyshoulders
tensed.“Gods,it’sreallyhim.”
“Yeah.”IwatchedDelanoapproach
Malik.Theotherwolvenwatchedclosely,cautiously.Theiruncertainty
regardingthePrincehungheavyintheair.
“Helooks…”Nailljoinedus,and
InoticedamuscleflexinginPerry’sjaw.
“HelooksnothinglikeI
expected,”Emilfinished.
Inotherwords,hedidn’tlooklike
themessypileoffleshandbonesIhadwhenIreturnedfromseveraldecadesof
captivity.
Emilclaspedmyhand,andIpulled
thefuckerinforaclose,tightembrace.“DelanosaidMalikdidn’twantto
return?”heaskedquietly.
Perryglancedatus.“Andthat
Poppytoldhimitwascomplicated.”
“Itis.”Iturned,slippingan
armaroundPoppyasshecametostandbesideme,butIdidn’ttakemygazeoff
mybrother.
MalikkneltinfrontofDelano
asKierancreptclose,eyeingbothofthem.Mybrotherspoke,butevenI
couldn’tpickuponthewords.Whateverhesaid,though,Delanorespondedwith
aslightnudgeofhisheadagainstMalik’shand.
Theactsentasmallshudder
throughMalikanddidn’tgounnoticedbytheotherwolven.Thetension
thickeningtheaireased.Poppypressedagainstmyside,herpalmrestingjust
belowmychestasMalikplacedatremblinghandonthetopofDelano’sbowed
head.Malik’seyesclosedasPoppy’sfingerscurledintomyshirt,hisfeatures
pinchingasheturnedhishead,dragginghisshoulderalonghischeek.Iknew
whatPoppyhadtobesensing.TheemotionwasclearlyetchedintoMalik’sface.
Sorrow.
Preela,Malik’sbondedwolven,
hadbeenDelano’ssister.
Chapter39
WedescendedthehilltoPadonia,flankedbythedozens
ofwolvenwhokeptpacealongthenarrowroadandhadevenbranchedoutfarther,
intotheWisteriaWoods.Nettaandseveralothershadalreadyreturnedtotown.
Hornssoundedasweclearedthethickestofthetrees,andthevalleythat
Padoniarestedinopenedbeforeus.
Aseaofwhitetentssatatthe
edgeoftheRiverofRhainandatthefootoftheRise,where—Mygodsdamn
breathsnaggedinmychest.
Banners.
Goldandwhitebannersrippledfrom
thebattlementsatoptheRise,eachonebearingtheAtlantianCrest—theone
Poppyhadchosenwiththeswordandarrowfixedinthecenterofthesunat
equallengths.
Gods.
She’ddoneit.
Changedthecenturies-oldcrest.
Showingthekingdomandtherealmthattherewasabalanceofpowerbetweenthe
KingandQueen,nomatterthefactthatshewassomuchmorepowerfulthanI.
Seeingitwasapunchofunexpected
emotion,straighttothechest.ItightenedmyholdonPoppy,dippingmyhead.
“You’refuckingperfect,”Iraspedinherear.
Sheturnedherheadslightly,
herbrowspuckering.“Whatfor?”
“Everything,”Itoldher,
blinkingbackdampness.“Everything.”
PoppylookedtotheRise.“The
banners,”shewhispered.“Youlikethem?”
“Icannotwaittoshowyouhow
muchIfuckinglovethem.”Inippedatherear,drawingasoftgaspfromher.
Herfaceflushed,butthesharp,
suddenriseofherarousaltoldmeshecouldn’twaitformetoshowhereither.
Istraightened,refocusingonthe
Riseitself.Branchesofthenearbywisteriatreeshadclimbedthestructure,
pressingintothestoneandsmotheringtheRiseinthelavender-coloredlimbs.
“Well,that’saproblem,”I
murmured.“Thewisteriatrees.”
“They’rebeautiful,”Poppy
whispered.“It’sthemostbeautifulRiseI’veeverseen.”
“Itis,butyou’renotgoingto
likewhatI’mabouttosay,”Ireplied.
Shesighed.“IthinkIknowwhat
you’regoingtosay.Thetreesneedtobecutback.”
Afaintgrinappeared.“They
needtobepulledout.Should’vebeendonelongbeforeitgottothispoint.
It’slikelyalreadyweakenedtheRise.”
“Ithas,”Emilconfirmedfromwhere
herodeslightlyahead,KierantrailingbetweenusasNaillrodetoourleft.
“Thetreeshavebreachedtheeasternwallsinsomeareas.”
“Well,theAscendedhavenever
beenknownfortheirupkeepofinfrastructure,”Poppymurmured.“Speakingof
theAscended,whatoftheRoyalswhooversawPadonia?”
“They’dabandonedthecitybefore
ourarrival,”Emilansweredwithasnortofdisgust.“Justastheydidin
Whitebridge—”
“AndThreeRivers,”Malikspoke,
breakinghisself-imposedsilence.“MostoftheRoyalshadfledtoCarsodonia.
TheyhavebeenarrivingsincePoppyrelievedJalaraofhishead.”
Naill’sgazecuttohim.“Yeah,
well,theAscendeddidn’tsimplyfleeWhitebridgeandPadonia.”
Dreadtookroot.“Whatdidthey
do?”
“Itwasn’tlikeOakAmbler.They
leftagraveyardbehindinWhitebridge.”Nailllookedaway,hisjawworking.“Like
theydidinthenorthernlandsofPompay.”
“Oh,gods,”Poppyuttered,
stiffening.“Wasthere…?”
“Nomortal—adultorchild—wasleft
aliveinWhitebridge,”Perryconfirmed,swallowingthicklyasthedreadburnedto
thegroundinawaveoffury.“Thousandsweredeadandhadalreadyturned.We
lostsomewolvenandsoldiers.TherewerejusttoomanyCraven.”
Poppy’sheadloweredasshe
leanedintome.IwishedtherewassomethingIcouldsay,butforsomething
likethis,therewasnothing.Absolutelynothing.
“TheydidthesameinPadonia,
butthepeopleherefoughtback,”Naillcontinued,andherheadlifted.“Alot
ofmortalsdied,butitwasn’tasbadasitwasinWhitebridge.Theytookouta
fewoftheAscendedintheprocess.”
“WhatofThreeRivers?”Iasked,
pushingtheragedown.
“TheAscendedtherefledbut
leftthemortalsalive,”Emilsaid.“Notsurewhy.Maybethoserulingthere
weredifferentthantheothers.Idon’tknow.”
“Doyou?”IdemandedofMalik.
He’dgonepaleashestared
ahead.“Ididn’tknowthat’dhappenedinWhitebridgeorhere,”hesaid
hoarsely.“ButI’veseenDravanatCourt—he’stheDukeofThreeRivers.Keeps
tohimself.Don’tknowmuchabouthim.”
“Butyoudoknowhim?”Naill
asked,andwhenMaliknodded,hiseyesnarrowed.“Exactlyhowcomplicatedhave
thingsbeenforyou,PrinceMalik?”
“Thatisaratherlongstory,”I
interruptedasadarkshadowcrossedtheroad,stirringthetopsofthe
wisteriatreesasweroundedthebend.“Thatwillhavetowait.”
ThegatesoftheRisecameinto
fullview,butitwaswhatflewaboveusthathadgarneredmyattention.
AllIsawthroughthecloud
coverwasaflashofsmokygraybeforetheshadowfelloverthebridgeand
tents.MyjawloosenedasacreatureaslargeasSettiswooped,touchingdown
onitshindlegsupontheRise,itscurvedhornsglisteninginthestreaksof
sunthathadbrokenthroughtheclouds.
Thedrakenmadeasofttrilling
soundthatsentawaveofgoosebumpsovermyflesh.
“MeyaahLiessa?”Reaver
said,havingslowedhishorse.“Ifyouhavenomoreimmediateneedofme…?”
“No.”Poppysmiledslightly.
“Youcandoasyouplease.”
Thedrakenbowedhisheadand
thendismounted,handingthereinstoPerry.Hequicklydisappearedintothewoods.
“That’sNithe,”Poppysaid,gesturing
tothegraydrakenontheRise.
AllIcoulddowasnod.Because,
mygods,Icouldn’tbelieveIwasactuallylookinguponadrakenagain.
Twomoreshadowsfelloverhead
aswereachedthebridge.AgreenonethatwasalittlelargerthanNithe,and
athirdslightlysmallerone.
“ThegreenishoneisAurelia,”
Poppyadded.“Thebrownish-blackoneisThad.”
Inoddedagainaswingsthelength
oftheirbodiesspreadoutwide,slowingtheirdescent.Theycamedownoneither
sideofthegate.ThickclawsdugintothetopoftheRise,shakingthe
wisterialimbsastheirlongnecksstretchedout.Theirheadsliftedtothe
sky,therowofhornsandthefrillsaroundtheirnecksvibratingastheir
staggeringcallechoedthroughthevalley.
Thecallwasansweredfromthe
woods.Ourgazessnappedupasanevenlargershadowfelloverus.Myeyes
wideneduponthesightofapurplish-blackdrakencrossingoverthetentsand
theRise.
“Andthat’sReaver,”Poppysaid.
“Yeah,”Imuttered,blinking
slowly.Reaverwasnearlytwicethesizeofawarhorse,butheglidedsoundlessly.
Theotherthreedrakentook
flight,liftingfromtheRiseinapowerfulsurgeofwingsthatsenttheair
ripplingthroughthevalley.TheyjoinedReaverastheyflewoverPadonia.The
sightofthemwassomethingI’dneverthoughttowitnessasIwatchedthem
disappearintothehorizonwhilewecrossedthebridge,joinedbythewolven
who’denteredthewoods.Theyfloodedthepathwaytothegatesassoldiersdrifted
outfromamongthetents
Idrewourhorsecloserto
Malik’s.Hestaredforward,asrigidasthedead.AsEmilandtheothersrode
past,thesoldierscaughtsightofMalik—ofPoppyandme,andthenthesound
came.
Shoutserupted.GoldenAtlantian
swordswerethrustintotheairandbangedoffshields—shieldsengravedwith
thenewAtlantianCrest.Theyloweredinawaveaswerodepast,thesoldiers
droppingtotheirknees,thumpinghandsandhiltsofftheground
Poppysquirmedintomeasthe
cheerscontinued,andthegatesopened.Shewasn’tusedtotheresponse.Hell,
Ineverreallygotusedtoit,butthiswasdifferent.
ThiswashowaQueen
andKingweregreeted.
Ifoundherhand,closingmine
arounditaswerodebetweenthetwobranchesoftheRiverofRhainandthrough
thegates.TheshoutscontinuedinsidetheRise,wheresoldierswerecamped
neartheentrance.
Andstill,thesoundfollowed
evenaswereachedthefieldsofcrops,andmortalscameoutfromthestalksof
corn,liftingtheirscythesandcheering.Themortalscheered
IleanedintoPoppy.“Wasit
likethisinOakAmblerorMassene?”
Poppy’sholdwasadeathgrip.
“No.”Shetookinatremblingbreath.HersmilewasjustasshakyasKieran
drewclosertous,hisearsperked.“Thisis…it’salot.”
Myholdtightenedonheraswe
rodedowntheroad,pasttheclusterofhomesandbusinesseswheremortals
streamedintothestreets,andothersstoppedwheretheywereonsidewalks,
bowingwiththeirhandsovertheirheartsandpalmstotheground.
Emillookedoverhisshoulderat
Poppy.“Yourplanworked,bytheway.TheyheardaboutwhatwedidinMassene
andOakAmblerbeforeweevenreachedThreeRivers.Theyknewwedidn’tcometo
conquer.Thesamehere.”
ThesmileonPoppy’sfacewas
steadiernow.“Itwasourplan,”shesaid.“Andeveryonewhofollowed.
You.Vonetta.Allofyou.”
Emilsmiled,duckinghischinas
hefacedforward,therecognitionwarminghischeeks.
Prideliftedmychineven
higher.She’dbeensoafraidoftakingtheCrown.OfnotbeingagoodQueen
becauseshebelievedshewasn’tready,trained,orworldlyenough.Andyet,she
knewthatshehadplayedaroleinthis—amajorrole—butnotalloftheroles.
Wisteriatreesreturned,liningthe
road,andthesoundofrushingwaterfollowedustothemanorinthecenterof
thetown.Thewoodshadevenpressedinhere,leavingtheinteriorRisebarely
visible
Largertentswerepositioned
aroundthefortresswallandinsidethecourtyard.Ilookedahead,myheart
becomingaknotasseveralgeneralsstoodattheentrancetothemanor.
AhandfulofyoungerAtlantians
rusheduswithwideeyes,bowinghastilyaswedismounted.Theybeganrounding
upthehorsesasNettareturned,stridingpastthegenerals.Shewasn’talone.
AmortalIhadn’tseensinceOakAmblerfollowed—onewholookedvastly
differentwithherwhitehairpulledbackfromherface.Astrangesensation
settledinmychestasIeyedTawny.
Poppysteppedaroundme,going
toNettaandTawny.ThemortalreachedPoppyfirst,embracingher,andItensed
fornogoodreasonotherthan…
Kieran’sgazecaughtmine.Heraised
hisbrows.He’dwarnedmethatthemortaldidn’tfeelright.Itwasn’texactlysomething
bad.Justdifferent.AsensationIcouldn’tplace.
“Howhaveyoubeen?”Poppy
asked,claspingTawny’shands.“Youfeelwarmer.”
“Alittle.”Tawnysmiled.
“ProbablybecauseVonettahasmebeingallactiveandstuff.”
PoppyarchedherbrowatNetta,
whogrinned.“GiannaandIhavebeenteachingherhowtofight.She’saquick
learner.”
“OnlybecauseofwhatPoppyhas
taughtme,”Tawnysaid.
“Ionlytaughtyoutostickthe
sharpendintosomething,”Poppyamended.
Tawnygrinned,lettinggoofPoppy’s
hand.“Hey,ifthatismorethanhalftheknowledgerequired,I’velearned.”
IrelaxedasPoppyturnedto
Netta.“Iwishtohaveanotherhug,onewherewe’rebothontwolegs.”
Laughing,Nettaobligedas
DelanostayedclosetoPoppy.“I’vemissedyou,”Poppysaid,pullingback.
“You’vebeenwell?Noinjuries?Areyou—?”
“I’mokay.”Nettaclaspedher
shoulders.“We’reallokay.”
“Becauseofyou,”Poppy
insisted.“You’veledthearmiesspectacularly.”
“Ihadhelp.”
“Namely,me.”Emilroundedthe
horses.
Shakingmyhead,Ihandedthe
reinstoasteward.“Setti?Ishehere?”
“Yes,YourMajesty,”theyoung
maleanswered.“Givennothingbutthefreshesthayandfeedashe’sawaited
yourreturn.”
“Thankyou.”
IturnedtofindTawnystanding
nottoofarfromme.Damn.Hereyes…Theywereleachedofallcolor.“I’mglad
toseeyouupandmovingabout.”
SheeyedmeasbluntlyasIhad
donewithher.“AndI’mgladtoseethataccordingtoeveryoneI’veasked,you
lovePoppyjustasfiercelyasshelovesyou,andIdon’thavetopunchyoufor
lyingtoher.”
Poppywhippedaround.“Tawny.”
“Andforkidnappingher,”she
tackedon.
“Tawny.”Poppyhurried
overtousasNettalaughed.
“What?”Themortalwhofeltlike
somethingelsecrossedherarms.“I’mjustpointingoutthat
everyone—”
“Andshedidaskeveryone,”
Emilchimedin.
“Saidyouwereutterlydevoted
toPoppy,”Tawnyfinished.
“Thatisnotwhatyou’re
pointingout,”Poppycountered.
Fightingagrin,Iinclinedmy
head.“Ifyoufeelasifyoustillneedtopunchme,Iwon’tstopyou.”
Poppyshotmealook.
Herfriendsimplystudiedmeas
ifshewereattemptingtodetermineifIwasworthyofsucheffort.“I’llkeep
thatinmindforlater.”
“No,youwillnot,”Poppysaid.
“Youcan’tgoaroundpunchingtheKing.”
“Someoneforgottotellyou
that,”Kieranreplied,brushingpastPoppy.
“Youpunchhim?”Tawnyasked,
blinking
“No.Notreally.”Poppy’scheeks
turnedred.
“Shehasstabbedme,though.”I
tookPoppy’shand.“Inthechest.”
“Oh,mygods,”Poppysnappedas
Tawny’seyeswentwide.“Youreallyneedtostoptellingpeoplethat.”
“ButIdeservedit,”Iadded,my
smilefadingasIturnedtotheentranceandsawthatHisahadjoinedthegenerals.
Itwaswhowalkedwithherthatdrewmyattention,though.Myfather.Tension
creptintomyshouldersasIlookedtoseeMalikdismountingseveralfeetaway.
IturnedtoNaillandspoke,myvoicelow.“IwantyouandEmiltokeepaneye
onMalik.”
Naillnodded.“Done.”
KeepingPoppy’shandinmineand
KieranatmysidewithNettawithDelanoathers,Istartedtowardmyfather.Aware
thatMalikhadfalleninstepbehindme,Ibracedmyselfforseveralroundsofawkward
reunions.
Irecognizedthegeneralsbefore
me.LizethDamronstoodnexttoPerry’sfather,whosportedaratherimpressive
beard.MystarefixedonAylard,thegeneralPoppyhadwarnedmeabout,asthey
loweredtotheirknees.
“La’SereremainedatThree
Rivers,”Nettainformedus.“MurinatWhitebridge.”
“Haveyouhadanyissueswith
them?”PoppyaskedasTawnytrailedbehindNetta.“Aylard?”
“Nothingwehaven’tbeenableto
handle,”shesharedasthegeneralsroseandsteppedaside.
Mygazelockedwithmyfather’s,
andjustlikethat,Ifroze,unabletogoanyfarther.Hecamedownastep.He
lookedolderthanIremembered—thelinesatthecornersofhiseyesdeeper,the
bracketsaroundhismouthnowgrooves.Hisarmorcreakedasheloweredhimselfto
oneknee,bowing.
“Youmayrise.”ItwasPoppywho
gavethesoftlyspokenorderI’doncetaughthersinceI,apparently,hadforgotten
howtofuckingspeak.
Istillhadn’tmovedasmy
fatherrose,hisgoldeneyesneverstrayingfrommine.“Cas.”
Atonce,Iwasasmallboy,
yearsawayfromhisCulling,shakenwiththeneedtorunandtakehisoutstretched
hand.ButIwasrootedtowhereIstood.
Poppysqueezedmyhand,reminding
methatwewerenotalone.Eyeswereonus,manybelongingtothosewhohadno
ideathattheirformerKingandQueenhadknownwhotheBloodQueenreallywas.
AtremorranthroughmeasI
releasedPoppy’shandandreachedformyfather’s.Heclaspedmyarm,hiseyes
brightashepulledmeinforatightembrace.Ifeltmyfather,whohadalways
beenlargerthanlifeandstrongerthananyoneIknew,shake.Myeyesclosed,
andIshook,too.Angercrashedintolove,andallIknewinthatmomentwas
thatthiswasn’tthetimetodemandanswersfromhim.Accountabilitywouldcome,
butitwasnotthekindthatrequiredanaudience.Itwasnotthekindthat
neededtobeownedwhenwewereabouttoendthiswarwiththeBloodCrown.
“Ididn’twanthertogo,”my
fathersaid,hiswordsmuffled.“Idemandedthatshestay.Sheputmeinmyplace
reallyquick.”
Athicklaughrattledme.“Ibet
shedid.”
“AndI’mgladshedid.”Hisembrace
tightened,andthenhesaid,evenlower,“Iknowthere’salotweneedtodiscuss.”
“Thereis.”Swallowing,I
steppedback,andPoppy’shandwastherewhenIreachedforit.“Butitwill
havetowait.”
Henodded,finallyliftinghis
gazetoPoppy.Hebegantospeaktoher,buthisattentionstrayedbeyondusto
hiseldest.Hepaledasifhe’dseenawraith,andMalik…hewasn’tlookingat
ourfatheratall.
Ourfatherswallowedhardand
movedtostepforward.“Malik,”hesaidroughly,andthatsound,itbrokea
littleofthehardnessthathadbuiltinmychest.Ourfathersoundedlikea
manlookinguponachildthathaddied.
Malikstaredatthewisterias
growingalongthemanor,hisfaceimpassive.“It’sgoodtoseeyou,Father,”he
saidflatly.Hisvoiceempty.“Youlookwell.”
Ourfatherstiffenedforseveral
secondsandthenbecameamanonabattlefield,staringattheonewho’djust
struckhimdown.“Asdoyou,son,”herepliedinatoneasvacantasMalik’s
hadbeen.Thatmuscletickedinhistemple,theonlysignthathefeltanything
atall.ThesamemovedinMalik’s.Ourfatherclearedhisthroat.“Foodand
drinkarebeingprepared.”Heturnedstifflytous.“Iimaginethereismuchto
speakabout.”
“Thereis,”Isaid,lookingat
ourQueenasshecurledherselfintomyarm.“There’sawartobeended.”
Myfatherstaredatmylefthandaswefilledhimand
thegeneralsinonwhathadoccurredinCarsodoniaandIsbeth’sdemandswhile
weatetheroastedmeatanddranktherichale.
Hetriedtohidethathesaw
whathadbeendonetomyhand.Sodidtheothers.Ithoughtthatitmightmake
thingsmorecomfortableforthemifIkeptithidden,buttheabsentfingerwas
apartofmenow.Theyneededtogetusedtoit.So,Ikeptmyhandonthe
table,visibletoall.
“WhatintheworldcouldtheBlood
QueenwantwithMalec?”Svenasked.
Poppywiggledabitinmylapas
shestaredatthetable,herfingerstillingoverthecutinthewoodshe’d
beenidlytracing.I’dsnatchedherwhenshereturnedfrommakinguseofa
nearbyprivy,pullingherintomylap.Probablynotthemostappropriate
seatingarrangementforsuchaconversation,butIcouldn’tcarelessaboutwhat
theothersthought.Iwantedherthere.Neededherasclosetomeaspossible.
Thefeelofherkeptmegroundedandgavemestrength.
AndIjustlikedthecurveof
herassinmylap.
Seatedtomyleft,Kierantooka
drinkofhisale,hiseyeswideningslightlyabovetherimofhiscup.Mygaze
brieflyflickeredtowhereMaliksatbetweenEmilandNaill.Knowingthatthe
generalspresentonlyknewtheBloodQueenasIleana,itreallylimitedwhatwe
couldsay.Malikhadn’tspokenatanypoint.Hadn’tevenglancedupfromthe
tankardofalehekeptrefilling.NotuntilSvenhadaskedhisquestion.Now,
hestaredatourfather.
Ourfatherwasalsodoingthe
table-starethingashepickeduphistankardandtookaheftydrink.He
exhaledroughly,liftinghisgazetoMalikandthenme.“TheBloodQueen’sreal
nameisIsbeth.”
Surpriserippledthroughmeas
Poppy’sheadsnappedup.Thegeneralswentsilentintheirshock.Ihadn’t
expectedhimtoadmitthat.Oneglanceatmybrothertoldmethathehadn’t
either.Thatsameglancealsotoldmethathewasthoroughlyenjoyingour
father’sdiscomfort.Maliksmirked.
LordSvenwasthefirsttorecover,
sittingbackinhischair.“Surely,you’renotreferencingtheIsbethweall
know.”
“Yes,it’stheIsbethyouareall
familiarwith,”Fathercontinuedwithaheavybreath.“Malec’smistress.”
“Andthefirstvampry,”Aylard
said.
“Shewasn’tthat.”Fatherlooked
attheAtlantiangeneral.“Shewasneveravampry.MalecAscendedher,buta
godcannotmakeavampry.Agodmakessomethingelseentirely.”
“Isbethisademis,”Poppyspoke,
lookingup.“Afalsegod,butagodinallthewaysthatcount.Shehasmasqueraded
asanAscendedthisentiretime,andnotmanyoftheAscendedevenknowwhat
shetrulyis.”
AylardfacedPoppy.“Butyoudid
thiswholetime?Youknewandyoudidn’ttellus?”Incredulitycreptintohis
toneasPoppynodded.Thehollowsofhischeeksflushedwithanger.“Howcould
youkeepsuchinformationfromus?”
Notasinglepartofmelikedhis
tone.“Thatinformationwasn’tnecessaryforyoutoknowuntilitwas,”Isaid,
beforePoppycould.“Butyourshockandangeraremisplaced.ItisnotyourQueenyoushouldbedemandinganswersfrom.”
Aylardstiffened,theflush
deepening.
“Mysonspeaksthetruth.Itis
IandEloanawhobearallresponsibility.Wekeptthetruthofheridentity
hiddenfrommost,”myfatherreplied.“OurQueencould’verevealedwhothe
BloodQueenwasatanytime,butIbelieveshedidnotdosooutofrespectfor
us.”Hisgazemetmine.“RespectthatneitherEloananorIbelievewehave
earned.”
Ilookedaway,inhalingdeeply.
Svenshookhisheadin
disbelief.“Youkeptthisasecretforyears—hundredsofyears.”
Fathernodded.
“Thiskindofinformationis
imperative,”Aylardcontinuedafterclearinghisthroat.“Itchangeswhatwe
knowabouttheBloodCrown.It’snotjustpowertheywant.”
Svennodded.“It’srevenge.”
Emilletoutalow,muffled
whistlefromKieran’sotherside.“Thisisawkward,”hemurmured.
Ihadtoagreewithhim.
“AndwhetherornotourQueen
keptthisinformationfromusduetorespectornotisirrelevant.Nooffense
meant,YourMajesties,”Aylardsaid.Slowly,myattentionshiftedbacktohim.
MyhandrestingonPoppy’shipstilled.“Youknewshewasvirtuallyagodand
chosetokeepusinthedarkwhileyouplannedtosendourarmiestodealwith
her?Thatissomethingweneededtoknow.”
Poppystraightened.“Iwilldeal
withIsbeth.Noneofourarmieswill.”
“That’sbesidethepoint!”
Aylardexclaimed.“Youhavenoright—”
“Careful,”Iwarned.
Kieranloweredhisglasstothe
tableashefixedhisstareontheAtlantiangeneral.“Ihaveafeelingthat
thingsareabouttogetmoreawkward,”hesaidunderhisbreathtoEmil.
Emilsnorted.
“Iwouldsuggestyouthinkvery
longandhardaboutwhatyoubelieveyouhavetherighttosaytomyQueen.”I
heldtheAtlantian’sgaze.“Beforeyouspeakagain.Oryouwilldiscoverfairly
quicklyhowyourKingrespondswhenyouoffendyourQueen.Fairwarning,itwill
likelybethelastthingyoudoforquitesometime.”
Aylard’scomplexionbecame
mottledashelookedaway,hispostureunnaturallystiff.
“Allofyouareright.Andyou’re
alsowrong,”Isaid,afterIwassurethatAylardhadgottenmymessage.“Itdoes
changewhatweknow.Itchangesthehistoryofourkingdom.Butitdoesn’t
changethefuture.TheBloodCrownstillneedstobedestroyed,andthewar
ended.Thatiswhatweneedtobefocusingonnow.Thatisall.”
Acrossfromus,thewolven
generalleanedintoHisa,whispering,andthenlookedatFather.“Agreed,”
Damronsaid.“So,IthinkweallknowwhyshewantsMalec.”
“Wedo,andwedon’t,”Poppy
saidasIgentlysqueezedherhip.“Obviously,therearepersonalreasons.She
stillloveshim,butshealsobelievesthathewillbeabletogiveherwhat
shewants.”
“Atlantia?”Damronfigured.
“ThedestructionofAtlantia,”Poppy
correctedsoftly.Lowcursesfollowed.“Shebelievesthathewillbeableto
remaketherealmsasone.Thatisherultimateplan.”
Father’sbrowsshotup.“There’s
nowayhewouldbeofanyassistancetoher.”HelookedtoPoppy.“Weknowthat
hecannotbeinagoodstate.”
“Wedo.”Poppytuckedastray
pieceofhairbackfromherface.“That’sthepartthatdoesn’tmakesense.But
yourememberwhatFramontsaid—thePriestinOakAmbler?Wewererightabout
whohebelievedtheTrueKingtobe.It’sMalec.Butwhatwedon’tknowishow
orwhyIsbeththinkshewillbeabletodoanythingforher.”
AsPoppyspoke,IwatchedMalik
foranyhintthathewouldbringuptheprophecyoranyofthepartsabout
PoppybeingtheHarbinger.Hedidn’t.Yet.
“Buthewouldbeabletorecover
eventually,”Vonettasaidfromwhereshesat,thechairPoppyhadsatinempty
betweenus.“Wouldn’the?”
Fathernodded.“Hewouldneedto
feedalot,andIimagineitwouldtaketime.Atthatpoint,evenoncehe
recovered,there’snotellingwhatmentalstatehe’dbeinorwhathemightdo.”
IsentNaillacurtnod,andhe
rose,alongwithEmil.TheyquietlynudgedMalikfromhisseat,escortinghim
fromthechamber.MalikmayhaveagreedtoaidusindefeatingtheBloodCrown,
andhemayalreadyknowwhatweplannedwhenwereturnedwithMalec,buthe
didn’tneedtoknowanyofthedetails.Itrustedhimtoapoint,butIwasn’t
afool.
“Butwewon’tallowthattimeto
transpire,”IinformedthemonceMalikwasgone.Ourfather’sjawhadhardened
withMalik’sdeparture,butheremainedquiet.“Wewilldoassheasksandbring
herMalec,butonlytoliftthecursesheplacedonKieranandtodrawherout
ofCarsodonia.ShewillnotgetachancetouseMalecinanyway.Whenwemeet
withherintwoweeks,wewillendthiswar,onceandforall.”
Allthegeneralslistenedintently
asDamronsaid,“I’mlikingthesoundofthat.”
Thediscussionofhowwewould
takeCarsodoniawentrathersmoothly,consideringhowithadbegun,mainly
becauseAylardwaspracticinghisshut-the-fuck-upruleoflife.Planswere
madetocallMurinandLa’Sereinfromthesurroundingcities.Cyrwastoofar
outinOakAmbler.Therewasnotimeforustoreachhimandforthegeneralto
joinus,butwordwouldbesenttohimanyway.Wetalkedoverwhatwecouldof
howweplannedtolaysiegetoCarsodonia,doingsowiththeknowledgethatwe
hadtobefluidinthoseplans—planswewouldalsoneedtoincludethedraken
inonwhentheyreturnedfromtheirflight.
“HaveyouheardfromEloana?”
Poppyaskedofmyfather.“Wassheabletotellyouanythingaboutwhereshe
entombedMalec?”
Fatherclearedhisthroat.“Yes.
JustbeforewearrivedinPadonia.Eloanawasabletogivesomedetail,”hesaid
asPoppyleanedforward,thelengthofherbraidslippingoveroneshoulder.“Malec’s
entombmentisinthenortheastern-mostportionoftheBloodForest.”
“Thatwouldbe…”Poppypickedup
theedgeofherbraid.
“NearMasadonia,”Delanotold
herasIdraggedmythumboverthecurveofherhip.“Afewdays’ridefrom
here,ifthat.”
Poppybegantwistingherbraid.“Anything
else?”
“You’vebeeninthere,”Father
said,gesturingwithhischintoanarrowwindow.“Youknowthatalotofit
looksalike.ButshedidsaythattherewereruinsinthatportionoftheBlood
Forest.TheremainsofwhateverexistedtherelongbeforetheBloodForest
grew.Hewouldbeclosetothat.”
“Therecould’vebeenanynumber
ofsmalltownsthereatonetime.”Svenscratchedathisbeard.“Buttherewas
nothingtherebutfieldsduringtheWarofTwoKings.”
So,whateverhadonceexistedthere
hadbeenold.Possiblyevenasoldaswhenthegodswereawake.
“Thathelps,though.”Poppy
glancedoverhershoulderatmeandthenKieran,whonodded.“Icanusethe
spellyoutoldmeabout,”shesaidtoSven.“Ihavesomethingthatbelongedto
him.Aring.”
Svengaveherawarmsmile.“Clever.”
Apink,ratheradorableflush
stainedhercheeks.Ileanedin,pressingaquickkisstothenapeofherneck.
“Whenwefindhim,”shebegan,“Idon’tthinkweshouldattempttowakehim.Do
anyofyouknowifthatwillbepossible?”
Myfathershookhishead,looking
atSven.“Well…”theLordbegan,andPerryfilledaglasswithwhiskey,sliding
itinhisdirection.“Itreallydepends.Washeentombedinanysortofcasket?”
“Hewas,”Fatherconfirmed.“A
casketcoveredindeitybones.”
“Thatshouldbefuntotransport,”
Kieranremarked.
“So,Iimagineifyoudon’topen
it,heshouldremainasheiswhenyoufindhim,”Svensaid.
“He’sunconscious,”Poppysaid,
andSven’sstareturnedcurious.“Thatwashowmyfatherknewthatsomething
hadhappenedtohim.WhenMaleclostconsciousness,itwokeIres.”
“Interesting,”Svenmurmured,
backtoscratchinghisbeard.“So,he’sthePrimalofLifeandtheConsort’s
son,”Svenbegan,“andhisentombmenthadtohavesomeeffectonthe
environment.”
“BesidestheBloodForest?”I
said,andPoppystraightened.Hell.Icouldn’tbelieveit’djustoccurredto
me.“That’swhytheBloodForestisthere.Thetreesgrewbecausehewas
entombedthere.”
“Justasthetreesgrowfor
you,”Kieransaid,lookingatPoppy.
“Ithoughtyouallknewthat,”
Svenremarked,hisbrowslifted.
“Apparently,theydidn’t,”his
sonsaid,andDelanogrinnedbecausewehadn’t.
Poppy’sheadtiltedasshe
studiedmyfather.“WhoexactlyhelpedEloanawithaPrimalspell?Doweknow
whosePrimalessencesheused?”
“Wasn’tme,”Svenremarked.
“IbelieveWilhelminahelpedher,”
Fathersaid,andnoneofushadbeenexpectingthat.“Whatessencesheused…I
don’tknow.”
“Butdoweknowwhatbecomesof
MaleconcewedefeattheBloodCrown?”Hisaasked.“Doweputhimbackintothe
ground?”
Alleyes,includingAylard’s,
turnedtous.Ididn’tanswer,havingenoughsensetoknowthatitwasn’tmy
placetodoso.ItwasPoppy’s.
“No,”shesaid,squaringher
shoulders.“Wemakesurehereturnshomewithhisbrother,toNyktosandthe
Consort.”
Chapter40
Poppy
Itwasearlyeveningbythetimewefinisheddiscussing
ourplanstoleavefortheBloodForest,andIwasabletospendsometimewith
Tawny.Ienteredthechambers,relievedtofindtwodeeptubssidebyside,
bothfilledwithsteamingwater.
WhileCasteelhadlingered
behind—hopefullytospeakwithhisfather—IinspectedthechambersasIundressed.
Theexposedbeamsoftheceilingandthewhite-washedstonewallsremindedme
ofthebedchambersinNewHaven.However,thesewerefargrander,outfittedwith
sittinganddiningareasseparatedbyastandingscreen.Thewardrobedoors
wereopen,andIfoundtheclothingVonettahadbroughthangingthere.Butit
wastheitemsthathungnexttoitthatbroughtasmiletomyface.
ClothingforCasteel.
Theytrulyhadn’tdoubtedthat
we’dreturn.Together.
Acratesatatthebottomofthe
wardrobe—theonethatheldKingJalara’scrown.Anotherwouldjoinitsoon.I
stilldidn’tknowwhatIwoulddowiththem.
Idriftedtothetablebythe
bedandplacedmyhandonthecigarbox,knowingwhatlayinside.
Ourcrowns.
Inhalingdeeply,Ileftthebox
closedandwenttothetub.AfaintachereturnedtomyjawasIbathedand
washedawaywhatfeltlikeaweek’sworthofgrimebeforedryingoffand
findingarobe,slippingiton.AknocksoundedonthedoorjustasIfinished
tyingthesash.
“Comein,”Icalledout,passing
thestandingscreen.
Kieranentered,closingthedoor
behindhim.“You’realone?IfiguredTawnywouldbewithyou.”
“Iwaswithher,butshegrew
tired.”
Heglancedaround.“Ijust
wantedtocheckinandseehowyouwereholdingup.”
Mybrowrose.“I’mfine.And
you?”
“Perfect.”
Istaredathim.
Kieranstaredback.
“Areyoualsoherebecause
Casteelisspeakingwithhisfather?”Iasked.
Helaughedroughly.“That
obvious?”
“Alittle.”Ipaddedovertoone
ofthechairsbyanunlitfireplace.Adecanterofsomekindofamberliquid
satonasmalltablebesideacoupleofglasses.“Wantsomethingtodrink?”
“Sure,”heansweredasIpoured
twodrinks.“IfiguredifIlingered,Caswouldusemeasanexcusetonottalk
withhisfather.”
MychesttightenedasIhanded
Kieranaglass.“Ihopehe’sspeakingwithhisfatherandwithMalik,but…”
“Buthe’sgottohavealotin
hishead.”KieranleanedagainstthemantelasIsatinthechair.“Andhemay
notbeintherightheadspacetohearwhateverhisfatherwantstosay.”
Itookasipofthesmokywhiskey,
thinkingofwhatValynhadtoldme.“Idon’tthinkhe’lllikewhathisfather
hastosay.”
“NeitherdoI.”Kierantooka
drink,staringoutthenarrowwindowasmygazedroppedtothethinscaronhis
forearm
Curlingmylegsup,Isankinto
thecushychairasIwatchedKieran.Casteelwould’vedefinitelyfoundhisway
tomesoonerratherthanlaterifhebelievedIwasalone.ButKierancould’ve
visitedwithhissisteroranyofthefriendshehadn’tseeninweeks.Hecould
bespendingtimewithMalik.Butheprobablyalsowasn’treadytositdownand
talkwithhim.Eitherway,Kieranwasherebecauseofotherreasons,andIhad
agoodideawhattheywere.“DidCasteeltellyouthatwespokeabouttheJoining?”
Kieranglancedoveratme.“He
did.”Amomentpassed.“Hesaidthatyouwantedtodoit.”
Tellingmyselfnottoturnahundred
shadesofred,Itookanothersmalldrink.“Hewantsmetotakethenextcouple
ofdaystothinkitover,butIknowtheanswer.It’snotgoingtochange.”
Hiswintryeyesheldmine.“You
shouldtakethosedays,though,andreallythinkitover.”
“Iwill,butit’snotgoingto
change.Casteelwentovereverything.Iknowwhatitentails—whatcouldandcouldn’t
happen.”IknewwhattheJoiningentailed.Casteelhadgoneoveritindetail
aswesatabovetheWisteriaWoods.Nomatterwhatitdidordidn’tbecomeas
wejoinedtheiressencestomine,itwouldbeintimate.Intense.Life-altering.
Noneofuswouldbethesameafterwardinanyway.“Areyousurethisiswhatyou
want?Truly?”
“Itshouldbemeaskingthat
question,Poppy.”
Iloweredtheglasstomybent
kneeasIwatchedhimgotothechairacrossfrommeandsit.“Wewouldn’tbehaving
thisconversationifIwasn’tsure.”
“True.”Heleanedforward,glass
inhand.“Thesamegoesforme,Poppy.I’mherebecauseIwanttobe.”Thehue
ofhisblueeyeswasvivid,theglowbehindthepupilsbrighter.“Idon’tthink
manywolvenwouldturndownJoiningwithaKingandaPrimal.”
Mycheekswarmed.Istill
couldn’tbelievethatwaswhatIwas,butthatdidn’tmatteratthemoment.
“You’renotjustanywolven.Itwouldbenooneelsebutyou.”
Kierandippedhischinasa
sweettastegatheredinmymouth,atoddswiththebiteofwhiskey.“Don’tmake
mefeelemotionalaboutthis.Ifyoudo,you’regoingtomakethisweird.”
Ilaughed.“Well,it’sabouttime
I’mtheonewhogetstomakesomethingweird.”
Heshookhisheadasheclasped
thebackofhisneckwithhisfreehand.Severallongmomentspassed.“Youknow
IloveCas,right?”
“Ido,”Iwhispered.“AndIknow
helovesyou.”
“Iwoulddoanythingforhim.I
woulddoanythingforyou,”hesaid,echoingwhatCasteelhadsaid.Helooked
upatme.“Andknowingthatyouwoulddothisformemeans…”Heswallowed.
“Therereallyaren’twordsotherthanthatmyreasonsforagreeingtothe
JoininghaveverylittletodowithCasbeingaKingoryouaPrimalgodand
everythingtodowiththeloveIhaveforbothofyou.”
Mybreathcaughtasaknotof
emotionlodgeditselfinmychest.“Nowyou’remakingthisallemotional.”
“Sorry.”
“No,you’renot.”
Kierangrinned,loweringhis
handasIfoughttheurgetoaskhimwhatkindoflovehefeltforCasteel.For
me.Iknewitwasn’tafamilialoneandthatitwentbeyondwhatonefeltfor
friends.Ialsothoughtthatitwasn’tthesameaswhathe’dfeltforElashya
orwhatCasteelandIfeltforeachother.ButIalsoknewthatwhatIfeltfor
Kieranwasn’tthesameaswhatIfeltforDelanoorVonettaorTawny.Itwas…more
Hesatback,eyeingmeashe
restedhisankleonhisknee.“Youhavethatlook.”
“Whatlook?”
“Theonethatsaysyouhavea
questionyou’retryingnottoask.”
“No,Idon’t.”
Kieranarchedabrow.
Isighed,thinkingitwasrather
annoyingthatheknewmesowell.NeedingcouragetoaskwhatIwantedtoknow,
Itookalongerdrink.Itdidverylittletoaidme.“What…whatkindoflovedo
youfeel?”
HestudiedmeuntilIalmost
startedsquirminginthechair.“Therearemanykindsoflove,butwhenit
comestoyou,it’sthekindthatallowedmetomakethat—”Heinhaledsharply,
hisjawhardening.“It’sthekindoflovethatallowedmetomakethat
promisetoyou,Poppy.It’sthesamekindoflovethatallowedyoutoaskthat
ofme.”
Casteel
ThebedchamberwasdimlylitwhenIentered.Kieran’s
scentlingeredbythefireplace,wheretwoemptyglassessatonasmalltable.
Strippingofftheweaponsandstrapsthatheldtheminplace,Ileftallbut
onedaggeronthechestbythestandingscreen.
Myheartgaveanunsteadyleap
whenIlookedatthebedandsawPoppythere,curledonherside,theblanket
pooledatherwaistandherrobeloosened,baringonecreamyshoulder.AsI
strippedoffmyclothingandmadequickuseofthecooledbathwater,Ididn’t
thinkmyheartwouldeverstopgivinglittlejumpswheneverIlookeduponher.
Didn’tthinkIwouldevergetusedtolookingatherandknowingthatIwas
hersandshewasmine.
ImadesureIwascompletelydry
beforesteppingtowardthebed.Ididn’twanttowakeher—well,thatwasalie.
Iwantedtoseethosebeautifuleyes.Havehergiftmewithoneofhersmiles.
Hearhervoice.Herlaugh.So,yeah,Iwantedherawake,butthemorningwould
comesoonenough.Weallneededourrest,forthejourneyintotheBloodForest
wouldn’tbeaneasyone.Carefullypullingbacktheblanket,Ieasedintobed
andkeptmygodsdamnhandsandarmstomyself.IfItouchedher,thenyeah,I
wouldspendthenightstaringattheceilingwithahardcock.
Forcingmyeyesclosedandmy
breathingtosteady,bysomekindofmiracle,Ifellasleep.Ididn’tknowhowlong
IrestedbeforeIfoundmyselfinthatmustyanddarkcell,scratchingCraven
clawsandtherattlingofchainstheonlysounds.Thebandatmythroatwas
almosttootighttoswalloworbreathedeeply,andthepaininmyhandandin—
Iwokewithajolt,myeyesflying
opentoseeshadowsswayingacrosstheexposedbeamsoftheceiling.I’m
notthere.Myheartthumped.I’mhere.Airwheezedinandoutof
mylungsasIrepeatedthosewordslikeafuckingprayer.
ThebedshiftedslightlyasI
draggedmyhandsdownmyface,feelingtheroughnessofcalluses—ofwhatwas
absentthere.
Poppyrolledtowardme,pressing
thelengthofherhalf-clothedbodyagainstmine.“Imissedyou,”shemurmured.
Fuck.
Myheart.
Hervoice.
Itcalmedme.
Loweringmyhands,Icurledan
armaroundherback,soakinginherwarmthandsoftness.“Imissedyou.”
Shewiggledincloser,slidinga
legbetweenmine.“Didyoutalkwithyourfather?”
“Longenoughtotellhimthat
whateverhefeltheneededtosay,ithadtowait.”Itangledmyfingersinher
hair.“Hewasn’thappytohearthat,buthebackedoff.”
“So,youdidn’treallytalkto
himatall.”
“Idon’twantwhateverhehasto
sayinmyheadrightnow,”Iadmitted.Nothinghecouldsayatthemomentwould
makemeunderstandwhyheandmymotherhadkepttheBloodQueen’sidentity
fromus.“Notwhenthere’severythingelse—findingMalec.MeetingwithIsbeth.
Endingthewar.”
Herhandslidovermychest.“I
canunderstandthat.”Sheyawnedsoftly.“It’swhyIdidn’taskMalikanymore
questionsaboutthatnightinLockswoodoraboutCoralenaandLeo.”
Iglanceddownatthetopofher
head.Shewasn’treadyforwhateverMalikhadtoshare.JustasIwasn’twhen
itcametomybrotherandourfather.“Youshouldgobacktosleep.”
“Iwill.”Butthathandofhers
drifteddownmystomach.
“Thatdoesn’tfeellikeyou’re
goingbacktosleep.”
Poppydidn’tsayanythingfora
fewmoments.“Areyouokay?”
Hadmynightmarereachedher?Or
hadshewokenandsimplysensedthelingeringmessofemotions?Closingmy
eyes,Itookadeepbreath.WhenIdidn’tanswer,whenIcouldn’t,sheturned
herhead,pressingakisstomychest.
“Youwillbe,”shewhispered.
“Yeah,Iwillbe.”
“Iknow.”Herhandslidunderthe
blanket.
Myentirebodyjerkedasherfingers
grazedthetipofmyalreadyhardeningcockandsherosehalfway.
Shedidn’tgivemeachancetosay
anotherword.NotthatIwascomplaining.Herlipsfoundmine,andherkisswas
asweetsweep.Myarmaroundhertightenedasshepartedmylipswithhertongue.
ThekisswentonuntilIthrobbedforher.
Gods,Ialwaysached
forher.
“Cas,”shewhispered,closingher
fingersaroundmydick.“Ineedyou.”
Ishudderedatherwords—atthe
truth.ItwasIwhoneededher,andsheknewthat—knewthathertouch,hercloseness,
wasgrounding.AreminderthatIwashere
“Now,”shedemanded.
Herboldorderbroughtfortha
chuckleasIcuppedhercheek.“Whatisityouwant?”
“Youknow,”shewhispered
againstmylips.
“Maybe.”Islidmyhanddownher
throat,pastthosesensitive,healingbitemarks,andoverherbreastwhereher
nipplepebbledbeneaththecottonoftherobe.Ikeptgoing,overthesoftswell
ofherbellyandthenbetweenherlegs.“Butyoushouldtellme.”Ibrushedthe
backsofmyfingersoverherdampheat,smilingwhenshemoaned.“Justin
case.”
Hergriponmydicktightened.
“Iwantyoutotouchme.”Sherestedherforeheadagainstmine.“Please.”
“Youneverhavetosayplease.”
Idrewmyfingeralongtheverycenterofher.“Butitdoessoundsoprettyon
yourlips.”
Poppy’sbreathcaughtasI
slippedafingerinsideher.Shenippedatmychin,causingmyentirebodyto
jerkoncemore.Ithrustmyfingerdeeper.“Likethis?”
“Yes.”
Ikissedher,easingmyfinger
inandout.“Andlikethis?”Myvoicewasrough,heavy.
Herbackarchedasherhand
beganmovingintimewithmyshallowthrusts.Herhipsbegantomove.“Mm-hmm.”
Smoothingmythumboverher
clit,Imarveledatthewayherentirebodytensed—howherhandstoppedmoving.
Igrinned.“Andwhataboutthat?”
Shemoaned,anditwasasoundI
couldlistentoforaneternity.“Ireallylikethat,”shesaid,butherhand
leftmycockandfoldedaroundmywrist,pullingmytouchfromher.“ButIwant
more.”
Poppymovedthen,lettinggoof
myhandandeasingontoherelbows.Therobe,half-untied,slippeddownher
arms.NeverinmylifehadIbeenmoregratefulfortheenhancedeyesightshe
wassoenviousof.
Rosybreaststhrustup,their
tipspuckered.Hercheekswereflushed,legsspreadwide,openandinviting.My
godsdamnmouthwateredatthesightofher.Irosehalfway.“You’rebeautiful.”
Itookineveryinchofexposedflesh.“YouknowwhatIdon’tunderstand?”
“What?”
“Howyoudon’tspendalldaywith
thoseprettyfingersbetweenthoseprettythighs.”Islidahandunderthe
robe,grippingherhip.“That’swhatIwoulddoifIwereyou.”
Shelaughed.“You’dgetvery
littleelsedonethen.”
“Itwouldbeworthit.”Mygaze
landedonwhereherhandrestedonherlowerbelly,mereinchesfromthatwonderful
heatofhers.“Ijustrealizedsomething.”Mythroatdried.“Haveyouever
touchedyourself?”
Ablushsweptacrosshercheeks,
andafteramoment,shenodded.Anddamnifthatdidn’tsendanalmostpainful
boltoflustthroughme.“Iwouldlovenothingmore”—pickingupherhand,I
liftedittomymouth.Iclosedmylipsaroundthefingerbearingourring—“than
foryoutoshowmeexactlyhowyoutouchyourself.”
Herinhalewasanaudibleoneas
Iloweredherhandtotheshadowyspacebetweenherthighs.Iletgo,andfora
moment,Ididn’tthinkshewoulddoit.
ButInevershould’vedoubted
her.
MyQueenbackeddownfromnothing.
Thedelicatetendonsalongthe
topofherhandmovedlikepianokeysassheslippedthatfingerinside
herself,movingitintinyplunges.
“Fuck,”Igroaned.“Don’tstop.”
Herbreathscameinshortlittle
pantsasshecontinuedplayingwithherself,andthescentofherarousal
filledeverysingleoneofmysenses.Iwasobsessed,watchingher.Didn’teven
blink.Notonceasherbreathingcontinuedpickingupspeed,asherhipsmoved
tomeetthethrustsofherfinger.
“Cas,”shemoaned.
Icouldcomejustwatchingthis.
TherewasagoodchanceIwould.“Iwanttoworshipyou.”
Poppyshuddered.
AndthenIdid,startingwith
hertoesandworkingmywayuphercalvestoherthighs.Herfingermoved
fasterasIneared,andIstoppedlongenoughtoflickmytonguethroughthe
wetnessthere.Shecriedout,herbackarchingasIbeganpayinghomagetoher
oncemore,trailingapathacrossherstomachandthecurvesofherhips.I
tookmytimeasifwewouldn’tbeontheroadoncemoreinafewhours.Ipaid
extraattentiontothosebreasts,lickingandsuckinguntilshetrembled—until
everypartofmewashard,heavy,andswollen.OnlythendidIreachbetween
us,pullingherhandawaytomymouth,whereIsippedathertaste.
“IthinkIwillneedtoseeyou
dothatdaily.”
“Gods,”sherasped.“Youareso
bad.”
“Yeah,Iam.”Closingmyhandaround
hers,IpresseditintothemattressbesideherheadasIeasedalegbetween
thosesoft,plumpthighs.Igavehermyweight,sinkingintoallthatwarm
softness,andshetookitallwithasoftsmile.“ButIcanbegood.Icaneven
bemorebad.Icanbewhateveryouwant.”
“Ijustwantyou.”Shepressed
herpalmtomycheek.“Asyouare.”
Hell.
Ishooklikeafragilesapling
inawindstormatthetouchofherheatagainsttheheadofmydick.Isank
intoherslickheat,lashedbyshardsofpleasure.“Iloveyou.I’msovery
muchinlovewithyou.”
Herarmswrappedaroundme,
holdingmetightlyassheliftedherlegs,curlingthemaroundmyhipsand
urgingmeforward.“Iloveyoualwaysandforever.”
Iignoredthethrobbinginmy
fangs.Iwouldn’tfeed.Iwouldn’ttakeanythingfromhertonight.Iwouldjust
give.
MyhearthammeredasIbegan
moving,intendingtogoslowandsteady,tomakethislast.Butthesoftsounds
shemade,thestartlingfrictionofourbodies,andallthatcamebeforethis
madeitimpossible.Nothingfeltlikeher.Absolutelynothingcomparedtohowshe
mademefeelandhowherverypresenceinvadedeverycellofmybody.Therewas
nome.Therewasnoher.Therewasonlyus,ourmouthsclingingtoeach
other’s,ourhandsandhipssealingtogether.Weweresoclose,sotightasI
groundagainsther,thatIfeltitwhenPoppybroke.Thespasmsobliteratedmy
control.Myreleaseblewthroughme,comingandcomingintightwavesthatleft
mybodyjerkingforseveralmoments.
Poppy’smouthsoughtmine,and
shekissedmesoftly.Shewas,gods,shewaseverything.Iloathedseparating
us,butIknewIwassecondsawayfromcollapsingonher.Lettingoutaragged
groan,Ieasedoutofherandontomyside.Gatheringherinmyarms,Iheldher
close,andsheheldmetighter.Whenmyeyesclosedthistime,Iknewthatno
baddreamswouldfindme.
MyQueensimplywouldnotallow
it.
Chapter41
Poppy
TheCravenstumbledthroughthethickmist,itscoal-red
eyesmindlesswithhunger,anditssallow,patchy,grayskinclungtoitsskull
fordearlife.
“That…”Casteeltwistedsharply,
hismovementsasgracefulasanydancer’sattheballsonceheldinMasadonia.
Hisbloodstoneswordslicedthroughtheairwithahiss,cuttingthrougha
Craven’sneck.“Isanoldone.”
Oldwasanunderstatement.
IhadnoideawhenthisCraven
hadbeenturned.Itsskinwasasbadasitsclothing.Itsmouthdroppedopen,
baringjaggedsetsoffangs.Howling,theCravenracedtowardme.Ifirmedmy
griponmywolven-bonedagger—
Asleek,russet-huedwolven
explodedfromthemist,landingontheCraven’sbackandtakingitdown.
“Oh,comeon,”Igrumbled.“I
hadthatone.”
Acedarandvanillaimprint
reachedmethroughthenotam.Vonetta’slaughdriftedthroughmy
thoughts.
Myeyesnarrowedonher.You’re
notevensupposedtobehere,Regent.
Herlaughgotlouder,stronger
asshetoreintotheCraven’schestwithherclaws,goingstraightforits
heart.
Mylipscurled.“That’sgross.”
“There’sdefinitelymoreforyou
tostab.”EmilcaughtaCraven,shovingitbackintothedamp,grayishbarkof
abloodtree.“Becausethey’relike…everywhere.Takeyourpick.”
Ispunasashriekblastedthe
air.ImadeouttheshapesofatleastadozenmoreCraveninthemist.
Threedaysinthenortheastern
regionoftheBloodForest,andthiswasthefirsttimewe’dcomeacrossahorde
thissize.We’dseenafewCravenhereandthere—atmost,halfadozen.But
today—orwasittonight?Itwashardtotellthisdeepintheforest,wherethe
suncouldn’tpenetrate,andsnowflurrieswereaconstantcompanion—itwaslike
wehadcomeuponanestofthem
IjumpedtothesideasNaill
struckdownonethatseemedtorisefromtheground.“Ican’tbetheonlyone
whothinksthismanyCravenisodd,”Isaid,bracingmyselfastheonesinthe
mistflowedforward,theirlow-pitchedwhinesrapidlyincreasinginsound—and
annoyance.
“You’renot,”Casteelagreed,
unsheathinghissecondbloodstoneshortswordashejoinedme.
Kieran,inhismortalform,
threwadagger,impalingaCraventoanearbytreeaswe,alongwithNailland
Perryandhalfadozenwolven,formedacircle.“Maybewe’regettingcloseto
theruinsorevenwhereMalecisentombed.”
ThatwaswhatIhadbeenthinking
asIkickedout,knockingaCravenbackintoDelano’spath.Heshovedhisblade
throughtheCraven’schestasIturned,jabbingmydaggerintoanother’sheart.
Ihadn’twantedtousethelocaterspelluntilwereachedtheruins,soIhoped
thismeantthatwewerenearingthatlocation.
Steppingforward,Inarrowlyavoided
Sageandanotherwolvenastheylopedpastme,corrallingtheCravenintoa
tightercircle.Icaughtonewhowasmoreskeletonthanflesh,holdingmybreath
asIthrustthedaggerintoitschest.
“Youknow,Icouldhelp,”Malik
drawledfromthecenterofourcircle,whereheleanedagainstawagon,holding
ourhorses’reins.Wehadn’tgivenhimmuchchoicewhenitcametoaccompanying
usintotheBloodForest.WhileItrustedthathewouldnotreturnto
Carsodonia,thattrustonlywentsofar.Heneededtoremainwithus.
Casteeldarted,spinningashe
lashedoutwithbothshortswords,slicingthroughtwoCraven’snecks.Flashing
goldeneyesmetmine.“Didyouhearsomething?”
“Nope.”Ifollowed,catchingone
oftheshortswordsthatCasteeltossedinmydirection.
Sageforcedanothergroupof
Cravenforward.Ispun,cuttingthroughtheneckofoneandjabbingmydagger
throughtheother’schest.Kieranbrushedpastme,strikingdownanother.
“Iwouldjustneedaweapon,”Malik
continuedasIwhirled,catchingsightofPerrycleavingaCraveninhalfwith
abloodstoneaxe—anactualaxe—asIleaptoveraclusterofrocks.
“Anyweapon.I’deventakeasharpenedstickatthispoint.”
“FunnyhowIkeephearing
something.”CasteelleaptoverRune,alargeblackandbrownwolvenwho’d
joinedus.ThewolvensnaggedoneoftheCravenasCasteellanded,thrusting
hisswordforward.“Andthenagging-as-hellvoicekeepsrepeatingthesame
thing.”
“CanIhaveasword?”
KierantossedalimpCravenaside.“CanIhaveadagger?Astick—?”
“Realfuckingmature,”Malik
snarled.
“You’renotgettingaweapon.”
Casteelkickedoffamoss-coveredboulder,catchingaCraveninthebackasI
shotforward,bringingthesworddownonanother’sneck—asmallone.Toosmall.
“You’renotgettingaweapon.Notevenabluntobjectsuchasarock.”
IfeltMalik’seyes
roll.“ThoughtyoubelievedmewhenIsaidIwantedtofighttheBloodCrown?”
IarchedabrowatCasteelasVonetta
draggedaCravenforwardbyitsankle.
“Believingyouwanttodestroy
theBloodCrownisonething,”CasteelsaidasIdispatchedtheCravenVonetta
hadbytheankle.
“HowamIsupposedtohelpyou
fighttheBloodCrownwithnoweapon?”Malikdemanded.
“Useyourcharmingpersonality?”
Naillquipped.
Theedgesofmyheavycloakspun
asIturned,dippinglowasCasteel’sswordhissedabovemyhead.“We’llcross
thatbridgewhenwegettoit,”Casteelsaid,grabbingmyarmasIrose.He
pulledmeinforaquickkiss.Mystomachdippedinamostpleasantwayashe
thentwisted,thrustinghisswordthroughaCraven’schest.Lettinggo,he
lookedoverhisshouldertowherehisbrotherstood.“So,untilthen,let’stry
shuttingthefuckup.”
KieranshotmeagrinasI
knockedbackastrandofhairthathadfallenintomyface.“Doubtthat’sgoing
tohappen,”hesaid.
“Nope.”Ijumpedforwardasa
CravengrabbedholdofSage’stail,jabbingthewolvendaggerintothebaseof
thepoorsoul’sskull,severingitsspinalcolumn.
“Whatintheactualhell?”Emil
started,glancingdownathishand.“Arethesebloodtreesleaking?Whatis
this?”
“I’llgiveyouoneguess.”Perry
shovedMalikbackasaCravenbrokerank,chargingthem.“It’sinthename.”
“Fuckingdisgusting,”Emil
muttered,wipingtherust-coloredsubstancefromhispalmonhisthigh.
Iwasn’tsureifthetreeswere
reallyoozingblood,butitdefinitelywasn’tnormalsap,andIdecidedI
wouldn’tdwellonthat.
“Headsup,”Naillyelled.“To
ourright.”
CasteelandIturnedatthesame
time.Throughthethickmist,Isawseveralmoreshadowyforms.“Therehasto
bedozensmore,”Casteelsaidasthewolvengrowledlowintheirthroats.
Blowingoutanaggravatedbreath,IlookedatCasteel.“Iknowwe’retalkingaboutmeholdingoffonusing
theeather,butthisisgettingreally—”
Theleavesaboveusrattledasa
fiercewindwhippedthroughthesmallclearing,scatteringthemistandkicking
upthescentofrotanddecay.ItippedmyheadbackasKieransnappedforward,
grabbingthefrontofaCraven’stunicandslamminghisbladeintoitschest.
Anevendarkershadowfelloverus,blottingoutwhatlittlelightmadeit
throughthetrees.
“Aboutdamntime,”Kieran
muttered,dippingtotaphissister’sback,whowasasecondawayfromrushing
thenewgroupofCraven.
Reachingoutthroughthenotam,
Icalledthewolvenback.Severalhowlsrespondedastheyleaptoutofthe
mist,rushingpastusintothecircle.Casteelwrappedanarmaroundmywaist,
haulingmeclearoffmyfeetandagainsthischest.
“Careful,”hemurmuredinmyear.
Severalbranchesshearedoffand
felllikearrowsaroundasReaverdescendedamongthebloodtrees,hiswings
spreadoutwidebeforesnappingback.
Kieranstumbledtotheside.“Fucking
gods,everytime.”Wintry-blueeyesflashed.“Tellmehedoesn’tdo
thatonpurpose.”
Sincetellinghimthatwouldbe
alie,IsaidnothingasReaverextendedhislongneckandroared.Silveryfire
streamedforward,momentarilyblindingastheflamescutthroughthemistand
rolledovertheCraven.Thefiretookthemoutatonce,dozensgoneinamatter
ofseconds,leavingnothingbutashandfadingmistbehind.
“Niceofhimtofinallyjoin
us,”Emilremarked,earningasmirkfromKieranandanarrow-eyedglarefrom
ReaverashishornedheadsnappedinEmil’sdirection.TheAtlantianheldup
hishands.“ImeantI’mhappytoseeyou.”
“Youthinkhefoundanything?”
Casteelaskedashebrushedawaywardstrandofhairbackfromhisface.
“Ihopeso,”Isaid,sheathing
thedaggerasCasteeltookhisswordback.Reaverhadtakentotheairtheday
before,scoutingforanysignoftheruinsEloanahadsentwordof.“We’re
alreadyatthreedays.Thatmeansatleastthreemoretogetoutofhere.
AnotherdaytoreachPadonia.”
“We’llbefine,”Casteelassured
me,hookingthetwoclaspsthathadcomeundoneonmycloak.“We’llgetoutof
hereandtotheBoneTempleintime.”
Inodded,butitwouldtake
closetothreedaystoreachtheBoneTemple.Inibbledonmylowerlipasa
flareofdullpainshotthroughmyjaw.WeneededtofindMalecandgetbackto
Padoniawithsometimetorest.Toprepare.
“Don’tworry.”Kieransteppedin
closetous,hisgazecatchingmineashepickedupmybraid,tossingitover
myshoulder.“Iknowthat’seasiersaidthandone,”hecontinuedasashimmery
lightsweptacrossReaver’sbody.“Butwe’regood.Wegotthis.”
Casteelpressedakisstomy
templeashelookedtowhereamortalstoodwherethedrakenhadcrouched
secondsago.“NakedReavertime,”hemurmured.
Everyonewasprettymuchusedto
that.Whilemostofusstudiouslyavoidedlookingbelowtheface,Sage
practicallysatfrontrowandmadenoqualmsaboutsizinghimup,nomatter
whatformshewasin.
“Aboutaday’sridenorth,”
ReaverannouncedasNailltossedhimhisclothing.“Therearesomeruinsofwhat
appearedtobeasmalltown.”
Ittookalittlelessthanadayforustoreachtheruins.
HowReaverhadseenthemfromtheskywasbeyondme.Nothingbutstonefoundations
andcrumbling,half-standingwallswereleft.
“Thishastobeit,right?”Vonetta
askedasCasteelgrippedmywaist,helpingmedownfromSetti.Hisactwas
sweet,consideringInolongerneededtheassistance.
“Ithastobe.”Iturnedto
Reaver.“Yousawnothingelse?”
“Itraveledtotheshores,”he
answered,hoppingupontoawallandcrouching.“Therewasnothingbutthis.
Theruinsarelarge.Theforestthickensfromhere,butthiswasnosmall
village.”
“Thickensmorethanthis?”Emil
gesturedatthetightlyclusteredtrees.
Reavernoddedasaflurryof
snowswirledacrossthedecayingstructures.
Kieranunhookedthesatchel,
bringingitovertomeasDelano,nowinhiswolvenform,andtheothersspread
outthroughtheruins,keepingwatch.“Youthinkthisisagoodspot?”
“Honest?”Iplacedthesatchel
onawall,openingit.“Ihopeso.”
HechuckledasPerrycame
closer,andMalikslowlydismounted—underNaill’sconstantwatch.“Iwonder
whatusedtobehere.”
“Noidea.”Casteel’sbrowsfurrowed
ashescannedtheruins.“Itcouldhavefallenwhilehesleptandbecamelost
totime.”
Ashiverdancedovermyskinas
Ipulledouttheparchmentandaslenderpieceofcharcoal.Tothinkthata
townfullofpeople—possiblyhundredsifnotmore—couldhavebeenwiped
completelyfromhistorywasunsettling.
Casteelpickedupasmallrock,
placingitontheparchmenttoholditinplace.“Thanks,”Imurmured,writing
Malec’snamewhensomethingoccurredtome.“WhatwasMalec’slastname?”
“O’Meer,”Casteelanswered.
IeyedReaver.“Thatcan’tbehis
reallastname,isit?”
Reaverslowlyturnedhishead
towardme.Alongmomentpassed.“No,itisnot.”
“Doesheevenhavealastname?”
“Nyktosdidnot,but…”Thewind
liftedthepalestrandsofhishair.“Ifheweretoberecognizedbyasurname,
itwouldbeMierel.”
“Mierel,”Irepeated,thepress
ofcharcoalagainstparchmentleavingasmudge.“IsthattheConsort’slast
name?”
Apause.“Itoncewas.”
Casteel’sgazemetmine,and
thenIwroteitout.MalecMierel.Theeatherhummedinmychest.
“Whatnext?”Casteelasked,hischest
brushingmyarm.
Ireachedintothepouchatmy
hip,bypassingthetoyhorseIreallyneededtoreturntoCasteel.Ipulledout
thediamondring,placingitonthename.“Ijustneedmybloodnow.”
“Thatremindsme,”Casteel
murmured,unsheathinghisdagger.“Ioweyouaverylargediamond.”
IgrinnedasIreachedforthe
dagger.“Youdo.”
Casteelheldthedagger.“I
don’twanttowatchyoucutyourself.”
“You’dratherbetheonetodraw
blood,then?”Iasked.
“Notinthisfashion.”Hegave
meaheatedlookthatcausedmyfacetowarm.“ButIwouldratherdoitthan
watchyouinflictpainuponyourself.”
“Thatisstrangelysweet.”
“Keyemphasisonstrange,”
Kieransaidasheleanedback,crossinghisarms.VonettaandEmilcreptcloser.
“Ready?”Casteelasked.WhenI
heldupmyhandandnodded,hebenthisheadandkissedme.Henippedmylipas
thequickprickofpaintraveledacrossmyfinger.“Thereyougo.”
Feelingmyselfflusheven
hotter,Iheldmyfingerovertheringandparchment,squeezinguntilblood
beadedanddropped,splashingfirsttheringandthenstainingthepaper.
“Ireallyhopethere’smoreto
itthanthat,”Vonettamurmured.
“Therealwaysis,”Emiltold
her.
“Yourememberwhatmyfathertold
you?”Perryasked.
Nodding,Iclearedmythroat.“I
callupontheessenceofthegoddessBele—thegreathuntressandfinderofall
thingsneeded.IaskthatyouguidemetowhatIseektofind,connectedby
blood,name,andbelonging.”
Noonespoke.Ididn’tthinkanyone
evendaredtobreathetoodeeplyasmybloodseepedintoMalec’sname.Andjust
whenIthoughtImight’vemisspokenawordorsomething,theparchmentwheremy
bloodhadsoakedthroughignited
Vonettagasped,steppingback
intoEmilasaloneflameshotintotheair,nearlyastallasthetrees,and
thatflamewascold.Icy.Theessenceinmybloodstirredastheflame
rippledviolentlyandthenshranktowheretheparchmentwasscorchedand
charred,beginningtoburnawayuntilnothingbuttheringMalechadgiven
Isbethwasleftonthestonewall.
Casteel’shandfelltothe
centerofmybackasKieranunfoldedhisarms.Agustofwindcamefromabove
andbehindus,catchingtheashesandliftingthemintotheair.Panicexploded
foramoment,buttheashesjoinedwiththeflurries,andthousandsoftiny
specksbrighteneduntiltheyshimmeredlikefireflies.
“Whoa,”Naillmurmuredasthe
glitteringfunnelofashwhirledandspunforward,formingachurningcyclonethat
shotbetweenhimandMalikandcutthroughthetrees.
“It’sgoingtoofast.”Kieran
jerkedbackfromthewallasReaverhoppeddown.Shimmery,silverylight
zigzaggedthroughthetrees,stretching.“That’swaytoofast.”
Allofusstartedforward,the
wolvenleapingovertheruinstochasetheglitteringlights—
Thesparklingashdropped
suddenly,fallingtothegroundlikeluminoussnow.Thewolvendrewupshortas
thelightremained,formingasparklingpaththroughtheBloodForest.Mylips
slowlyparted.
“It’skindofbeautiful,”Vonetta
whispered.Emil’sgazeslidtoherasheshookhishead.
“Well,”Malikdrawled,stepping
forward.“Ithinkitworked,incaseanyonewaswondering.”
Casteelgrinned,butthecurve
ofhislipsfrozeashecaughthimself.Hisexpressionsmoothedout,andhis
jawhardenedagain.
Gods,thatmademesad.
Ireachedover,touchinghis
arm.Casteelsmiledforme,butitdidn’treachhiseyes.“Weshouldfollowand
doitquickly,”hesaid.“Wehavenoideahowlongthiswilllast.”
Pickingupthering,Iplacedit
inthepouchasCasteelwenttoSetti.
“Time,”Kieransaidquietlyto
me.“Givehimtime.Bothofthem.”
“Iknow.”AndIdid,butaswe
startedfollowingtheglittering,weavingtrail,anodduneasesettledinthe
cold,hollowpartofme.AsenseofdreadIcouldn’tplacerose,butitfeltlike
awarning.Areminder.
Thattherewasn’talwaystime.
Thewindingpathblanketedthearea,shimmeringover
thegroundasitwoveinandoutofthetrees.CasteelrodeSettiwhileI
walkedwithDelanoclosetomyright,feelingtooantsytosit.Iwasn’tthe
onlyone.Reaverwalkedahead,andthewolvenwereevenfartherout.Kieranrode
besideCasteel,butsomehow,Malikendedupwalkingbesideme.
WhichwasprobablywhyDelano
wassocloseheoccasionallybrushedagainstmylegs
“I’mbeginningtothinkthis
trailwillleadusstraighttotheStroudSea,”heremarked,hiswordsleaving
mistycloudsbehind.
“I’mbeginningtothinkthesame
thing.”We’dbeenwalkingforatleastanhour,thesparklingtraildisappearing
behindEmilandVonetta,whorodeattheback.
Severalmomentsofsilence
passedbetweenus,andIknewwithoutlookingthatMalikkeptglancingatme.I
alsoknewwithoutcheckingthatthequicklookswerereallystartingtoanger
Casteel.
We’dmadeourwayaroundseveral
low-hangingbrancheswhenMalikasked,“Whyhaven’tyouaskedmeaboutthat
night?”
Acidgatheredinmythroat,and
IhadnoideaifthatwascomingfromCasteel,Kieran,orboth.
“Youmusthavequestions,”Malik
continuedquietly,staringstraightahead.“Youlikelyhavethingsyouwantto
say.”
Ilaughed,butthesoundwas
dry.“IhavealotofthingsIwanttosay,butnoneofthemwillchangethe
past.”AndwhatanswershecouldhaveforwhateverquestionsImayaskprobably
wouldn’tdomuchformystateofmentalwell-beingorCasteel’s.Therewasonething,
though.Iswallowed.“HowdidCoralenadie?”
“Yousureyouwanttoknow
that?”Malikexhaledheavilyasheheldalimbback.“Shewasforcedtodrink
thebloodofadraken.”
HorrorandgriefcollidedasReaver
stiffenedahead,andIimmediatelyregrettedaskingthequestion.
“Itwasquick,”Malikaddedquietly
asDelanocrowdedme,hisheadbrushingmyglovedfingers.“Idonotsaythatto
lessenwhatwasdone.It’sthetruth.Corawas—Isbethfavoredher.Itwasone
ofthefewtimesshedidn’tdragoutpunishmentordeath.”
Pressingmylipstogether,Ishook
myhead.Ididn’tknowwhattosaytothat.Ididn’tknowhowtofeelaboutit.
“Cas,he…”Maliklookedoverhis
shoulderandthenfocusedonmeasflurriesdriftedfromthesky.“Hementioned
somekindofrhymeyousaidyouheardthatnight.Thatwasn’tme.”
Mygazeshottohim,mythroat
drying.Somehow,intheaftermathofeverything,I’dforgotten.“Iknow,”I
whispered,myskinchillingevenfurtherastheessencepulsedinmychest.
“Thatcameafter.Itwasn’tyourvoice.Itwaslike…”
ItwaslikethevoiceIheardin
Stonehill,urgingmetounleashmyfury.Tobringdeath.Thathadn’tbeen
Isbeth.
“Poppy?”Concernradiatedfrom
Casteel
I’dstoppedwalking.Delano
pressedagainstmylegsasmyheartthumped—
Animprintbrushedagainstmy
thoughts,onethatremindedmeoffreshrain.Sage?
Wefoundtheendofthe
trail,herresponsecame.There’sdefinitelysomethinghere.Ithasa
badfeeltoit.
Mybrowsrose,andIlookedup
asCasteeldrewSettitomyside.“Thewolvenfoundtheendofthetrail.Sage
sayswherethey’reathasabadfeeltoit.”
Casteel’sfeatureswerehardas
henodded.Itonlytookahandfulofminutesforustojointhewolven,wherethey
pacedrestlesslythroughbrokenpillars,infrontofawallofrockthat
traveledashighasaRiseandwascoveredinbloodtrees,nearlystackedone
ontopoftheother.Theiruneasewasatangibleentity,coatingmyskin.
Thetrailendedrightatthe
edgeofthetreesbeforearockyhillthatwasmoreofamountainthananything
else.Ilookeddown,seeingthatthetrailwasalreadybeginningtofade.
“Whatthehell?”Casteel
murmuredasheswungoffhishorse.“It’sadamnmountainofrockandblood
trees.”
“Ididn’tseethisfromthesky
atall,”Reaversaid,lookingup.“Thishastobewheretheforestwasthe
thickest.”
Casteelstrodepastme,entering
thecrowdedrowsoftrees.“There’sanentranceinthere—intherock.”
DelanofollowedasIwentto
Casteelandpeeredaroundhim,into…vastnothingness.“Canyouseeanything?”
“Alittle.Lookslikeatunnel,”
heanswered,squinting.“KieranorVonetta?Whatdoyousee?”
Kieranwasthefirsttojoinus,
leaningaroundmetolookinside.“Definitelyatunnel.Anaturalone,kindof
likewhat’sinthemountainsbackhome.Wideenoughforagrouptowalkthrough
singlefile.”
Itookadeepbreath.“Weare
reallygoingtohavetowalkinthere,aren’twe?”
Sagenudgedmyhand,herwords
reachingmythoughts.Wegofirst
“No,”Isaidoutloudincase
anyoneelsegotthesameidea.“Wehavenoideawhat’sdownthere.”
That’swhywegofirst.
Delano’sspringyimprintreachedme.
“Poppy,”Casteelbegan.
“Idon’twantthemgoinginto
thegodsonlyknowwhat.”
Hesteppedinclose.“Neitherdo
I.”
“Butwehavewaybettersenses
thananyoftheAtlantianshere.Orevenyou,”Vonettasaid.
Kierannodded.“She’sright.We
willknowifsomething’sdowntherethatweneedtobecarefulofbeforeanyone
elsewill.”
“Youcanallargueallyouwant,”
Maliksaid.“Butit’spointless.Becausesomethingiscoming.”
Allourheadssnappedtowardthe
rock.Isawnothingbutdarkness—
Asuddengustofwindhitthe
trees,rattlingthebranches.Theairsmelledstrangeandemittedalowhowl,
raisingthehairsallovermybody.
“Ireallywouldlikeaweapon,”
Malikannounced.
Reaver’sheadlifted.Theleafy
branchesstilledaboveandallaround,butthatsound…itstillcame.Amoan
frominsidethetunnelreachedusfromthedarkness.
“Whatinthegods’nameis
that?”Kieranasked,bloodstoneswordinhand.“Craven?”
Inthedarkness,thicker,more
solidshadowstookform.Shapesthatdriftedforward.
DefinitelynotCraven.
Theyglidedoutfromthetrees,
drapedinblack.Theirverythinlayerofskinhadtheghastly,waxypallorof
death.Althoughthesethingshadsomesemblanceofaface—darkeyes,
twoholesforanose,andamouth—itwasallkindsofwrong,stretchedsofar
intothecheeksitwasasifapermanentsmilehadbeencarvedintotheirfaces
andthenstitchedclosed.Theentiremouth.Buttheyweremoreskeleton
thanflesh.
“Aw,hell,”Casteelmuttered.
Iknewwhattheywere.Sodid
he.
Gyrms.
Chapter42
“Great,”EmilmutteredasVonettagroaned.“These
fuckersagain.”
Buttheirstitchedmouths…
Iwoulddefinitelyhave
nightmaresaboutthislater.
“Don’t,”ReaverwarnedRune,who
prowledtowardthemouthofthetunnel.“Don’tbitethem.What’sinthemisnot
blood.It’spoison.”
Casteel’sgazecuttothe
draken.“They’veattackedGyrmsbefore.”
“Notthiskind.”Reaverlifted
hissword.“TheseareSentries.They’relikeHunters.Neithertypeyouwould’ve
encounteredbefore.”
ThecornersofCasteel’slipsturned
down.“I’mgoingtohavetotakeyourwordforit.”
“You’dbetter,”Reaverreplied.
“Orthejunkthat’sinthemwilleattheinsidesoutofthewolven.”
Myeyeswidened.“Don’tengage
withthem,”Iorderedthewolven.“GuardMalik.”
Noneofthemlookedhappyabout
that,especiallyDelano,buttheybackedoff,circlinganeven-less-thrilled
AtlantianPrince.
“Maybeyoushoulduseyourfire
then,”Kieransuggested.“Especiallysinceyou’reallaboutburningshit.”
“Thefirewillnotworkon
them,”Reaversaid.“Theyarealreadydead.”
“What?”Casteel
mouthed,andIhadsomanyquestions—allthatwouldhavetowait.Eatherpulsed
inmychestasIgrippedthewolvendagger.Theselookedlikeacreepy
combinationoftheonestheUnseenhadconjuredinSaion’sCoveandwhathad
beenguardingIliseeum.Ishuddered.ThePrimalessencehadworkedontheGyrms
andtheskeletonsbefore,butdidthatmeanitwouldworkonthistype?
“Wedothistheold-fashioned
way.”Casteelshiftedhisswordtohisotherhand.
TheGyrmshadexitedthetunnel
andstoppedmoving,theirarmsattheirsides.Allofthem.Welloveradozen.
“Doyouthinktheyhavehands?”
Casteelasked.
Mygazeflickeddown.The
sleevesoftherobesweretoolongtotell.“Ican’tbelievethat’swhatyou’re
lookingat.”
Kieranglancedatme.“Whatareyoulookingat?”
“Didyouseetheirmouths?”
“Ofcourse,”Casteelmurmured.
“Ican’tstopstaringatthem.”
Kieransentmeasharplook.
“Really?”
“Theirmouthsarestitched
closed.It’screepy,butIguessit’sagoodthing,”Isaid.
Casteellookedoveratme.“And
whydoyouthinkthat’sagoodthing?”
“Becausethatmeanstherecan’t
be—”IquietedasoneoftheGyrmscockeditsheadtotheside.Alow,breathy
moancamefromitssealedmouth.
“That’s…well,disturbing,”Emil
noted.
Vonettashookherheadasshe
palmedherblades.“Youaretheking—”
“Ofgoodlooksandcharm?”he
suggested.
“Ofunderstatements.”
MygrinfrozeastheGyrmsmoved
inunison—andtheywerefast.Long,slenderbladesdescendedfromboth
sleeves—bladesthatglintedlikepolishedonyxinthesliversofsunlight.
“Shadowstone,”ImutteredasNaillinchedaroundabloodtree.
OneoftheGyrms’headssnapped
inhisdirection.Itshairlessheadtilted.Thecreaturemoved,itsrobebillowing
outfrombehinditlikeastreamofshadow.Perryspun,hisblademeetingthe
Gyrm’s,aclashofcrimsonandnight.
TheremainingGyrmsstreamed
forward,movinginaprecisevee.IshotforwardasCasteel’sswordarcedthrough
theair,cleavingthecreature’sheadfromitsshouldersastheGyrmgrabbed
forme.
“Allright,thesearen’tlike
theskeletonsinIliseeum,”Casteelannounced.“Headorheartseemstodothe
trick.”
“Thankthegods.”Emilspun,
slicingoffaGyrm’shead.
Imovedunderanother’soutstretched
arm.Inthebackofmymind,InoticedthattheGyrmhadn’tswungonme,which
wasnotablyodd.Ipoppedupbehindthecreatureasitturned,slammingthedagger
intoitschest.TheGyrmshudderedandthencollapsedintoitself,
remindingmeofwhathappenedtoAscendedwhenstruckdownbybloodstone.But
thiscreaturedidn’tcrack.Instead,itshriveledasifallmoisturehadbeen
drainedfromitsbodyinonebreathandthenshatteredintonothing.Allofit,
includingtheshadowstonesword,leavingonlythesmelloflilacsbehind—stale
lilacs.
Ahandclampeddownonmy
shoulder,bonyfingerspressingthroughmycloak,jerkingmeback.Itwistedat
thewaist,bringingmyarmdownontheGyrm’swithahardenoughblowtoknock
thegriploose.Casteelleaptthroughtheair,slammingintotheGyrm,spinning
itaround.Iwhirled,thrustingthedaggerintoitschestasCasteelshotmea
wildgrinbeforeturningtomeetanother.
Delano’sthoughtsbrushedagainst
mineinawaveofspringy-freshairasIsteppedback.TheseGyrmsaren’tattacking
you.
Ifollowedhisimprintbackto
himasoneoftheGyrmsswungitsswordonPerry.Inoticed.
Maybetheyrecognizeyou.
Maybetheydid,butthatwasn’t
stoppingthemfromattackingtheothers…orcomingatme.TwoGyrmsstarted
towardme,bladesattheirsides.Theeathervibrated,pressingagainstmy
skin.Iopenedmysenses,butlikewiththeotherGyrms,Ifeltnothingbutemptiness—cold
hollowness.
KieranshovedaGyrmbackagainst
atree.“Morearecoming.”Hethrusthisbladethroughacreature’schestwith
asnarl.“Aboutanotherdozen.”
“Ofcourse.”Istalkedforward.
“Atleast,they’renotcoming
outofthegroundthistime,”Vonettapointedoutasshethrustherbladethrough
achest.
“Thereisthat,”Naillagreed,
swinginghisswordthroughtheair.
AGyrmtotheleftmadeamove
asifhesoughttogetbehindme.“Idon’tthinkso.”
Turningsharply,Ikickedthe
creatureinthechest.Itstumbledback.Itwisted,swingingthewolvendagger
downonanotherGyrm’sforearm.Thebloodstone,eversosharp,slicedthrough
thepapery-thinskinandhollowbone,severingthearm.Thepalefingersspasmed
open,releasingtheshadowstonesworditclutched.Catchingitbythehandle,I
swungtheswordhighandwide,cuttingthroughtheotherGyrm’sneck,meeting
utterlynoresistance.Theshadowstoneswordcollapsedinmyhand,disappearing
asCasteelstruckdowntheoneitbelongedto.
Ipouted.“Ikindoflikedthat
sword.”
Kieranshotmealookashe
pushedanotherGyrmback.“Toobad.”
“You’renofun.”Ifirmedmy
griponthedagger.“Youknowthat,right?Nofun—”
“Holyshit,”Emilexclaimed,
stumblingback.“Theirmouths.Holyshit.Theirmouths.”
“Ishejustnowrealizingthey’re
stitchedclosed?”Casteelshovedhisswordthroughthebackandintotheheart
ofaGyrm.
“Toldyouitwasdisturbing.”I
knockedaGyrm’shandaside.“Touchingwithoutpermissionisnotokay.”
TheGyrm’sheadtilted,andthen
itsmiled.Ortriedto.Thestitchesstretchedandthenpopped,tearingfree.
Themouthdroppedopenassomethingblackandshinywiggledout—
“Whydoesithavetobesnakes?”
Ijumpedback,stomachchurningwithhorrorastheserpentslitheredforward,
quicklyblendinginwiththedarkground.“Snakes.Ihatesnakes.”
“Iwarnedyouall.”Emilslammed
hisswordintothegroundandthesoundtheserpentmadewhenhestruckitwas
notright.Itwassowrong.Itwasanear-piercingshriek.
“Whatthefuck?”Malikhopped
ontoalowwall.
“Youdidnotgivedetails!”Vonetta
shouted,dancingbackasSagepawedattheground,sendingasnakeflying
throughtheair.“Onceagain,youfailedtogivedetails!”
“Allyousaidwas‘their
mouths.’”Igasped,scanningtheground,havinglostsightofthelittle
wigglingbastard.“Why?Whyaretheresnakes?”
“MostGyrmshavetheminside,”
Reaversaid,slamminghisswordintoaserpent
Icouldn’tevenprocessthatutter…fuckery.
AGyrmprowledforward,anotherdisgustingcreaturespillingfromitsmouth.I
backedintoaboulder.Scramblingofftheground,Irosetomykneesonthe
rock.“Nope.Nope.Nope.Willeatherworkonthesethings?”IaskedReaver.
“Fromyou?”Hislipcurledindisgust
ashestabbedaserpent.“Yes,onlybecauseyou’reaPrimalabouttofinishthe
Culling.”
Casteelspuntowardmeasagrin
tuggedathislips.“Areyouhidingonaboulder?”
“Yep.”
“You’readorable.”
“Shutup.”Theeatherpulsed
violentlyinmychestasCasteelchuckled.Ilettheenergycometothesurface.
Asilveryglowwashedacrosstheground—oh,gods,therewasmorethanoneserpent.
Three.Seven—
Kieransnappedforward,slamming
hisbootdownonone.Thesound.Thestain.Bilecloggedmythroat.
Six.Isawsixsnakes.There
wereprobablymore,andIwassonotgoingtosleepforthenexttenyears.
ThePrimalessenceansweredmywillasitspreadoutfrommeasanetworkof
shimmering,silvery-whitelightlacedwithchurningshadows.Itwashedoverthe
ground,sparkingwhenithitasnakeandthenigniting.Theropeynightmares
screamed,blisteringmyearsastheywentupinsmoke.
TheremainingGyrmsspuntoward
me.LikewiththoseskeletonsoldiersinIliseeum,theessencedrewthemlikea
Craventospilledblood.Stitchestore,mouthsopened,andserpentsspilled
ontotheground,racingtowardtheboulder.
“Maybeit’stimeforyoutogo
allPrimalonthesecreeps,”Malikcalledfromhiswall.
Myskinandhandstingled,warming
asthecornersofmyvisionturnedsilvery-white.Powerrushedthroughmyveins.
EssenceeruptedfrommyhandsinsilverflamesfromwhereIknelt.
Theeathercrackledandspat,
dartingbetweenPerryandDelanoandstrikingtheGyrmbehindthemasthefiery
essencelickedandrolledacrosstheground,burningthroughthenewestbatch
ofsnakes.Iturned,eyesnarrowingasIsawtheremainingGrymstalkingthe
wolven.Itwasgoneinaflashofsilver.
Andthenthebloodtreeswereempty
ofanythingthatcouldspewserpentsfromitsmouth.“Anymorecoming?”
Kieranhadedgedclosertothe
mouthofthetunnel.“Idon’tthinkso.”
“Standback,”Isaid,gettingan
idea.Usingtheeather,Itwistedtowardtheopeningintherockandsenta
thinstreamofenergyforward.Lightsplashedagainstthewallsasittraveled
deepintowhatwasclearlyacave.
WhenitrevealednomoreGyrms,
Ipulledtheeatherback.Thesilveryglowfaded.
“Didanyofthoseserpentsbite
anyone?”Reaverdemanded.“Answernow.Theirbiteistoxic.”
Everyoneansweredinthe
negativeasDelanoplantedhispawsontheboulderandstretchedup,nudgingmy
arm.Ireachedover,sinkingmyfingersintohisfurasIsheathedthedagger.
Breathingheavily,Ilookedover
towhereReaverstoodinthewagon.“Ijustneedtoknow,”Isaid,willingmy
hearttoslow,“whydotheyhavesnakesinsidethem?”
“Theyhavenoinsides.No
organs,”Reaveranswered.“Theserpentsareallthatfillsthem.”
AllofusturnedtoReaver.
Perryswallowedasifhewereonesecondfromvomiting.Idroppedmyhandfrom
Delano’sneck.“Well,that…thatisevenmoredisturbing.IwishIhadn’t
asked.”
Casteelstoppedinfrontofme,
extendinghishand.
“I’mfine.”Isat.“Justgoing
tostayrighthere.”
“Forhowlong?”heaskedas
Delanohoppedontotheboulder,settlingontohisbellybesideme.
“Notsure.”
Hislipstwitched.
“Don’tyoudaresmile,”I
warned.
“I’mnot,”heswore,andthat
wasdefinitelyalie.“Therearenomoreserpents,Poppy.”
“Don’tcare.”
Casteelwiggledhisfingers.
“Youcan’tstayupthere,myQueen.WeneedtogetMalec,andwemayneedyour
extra-specialPrimalbadasserytodoit.”
Myeyesnarrowedonhim.“It
irritatesmewhenyou’reright.”
“Thenyoumustbeirritated
often,”Casteelreplied.
Kieransnorted.“Please,get
downfromtherebeforemysisterjoinsyou,andwehavetotalkthreeofyou
offaboulder.”
“Iamthiscloseto
joiningyou,”Vonettaadmittedasshekeptlookingattheground.
Delanonudgedmyarmagain,and
Isighed,takingCasteel’shandasIscootedofftheboulder.WhenDelano
hoppeddownbesideme,Itippedmyheadback.“IfIseeasnake,it’syourfault.”
Laughingunderhisbreath,Cas
pressedhislipstothetopofmyhead.“Adorable.”
“So,Icouldn’tbetheonlyone
whonoticedthattheyweren’tattackingher,”PerrypointedoutasMalik
loweredhimselftotheground.
“Oh,yeah.”IturnedtoReaver.
“Didtheyrecognizemeashis…nieceorsomething?”
“Theyprobablyrecognizedthe
Primalessence,”Reaversaid.
“ButtheGyrmsconjuredbythe
Unseendidgoafterher,”Casteelbitout.
“Idon’tknowwhattheseUnseen
are,orhoworwhythey’dbesummoningGyrms,”Reaversaid.“Tellme.”
Igavehimabriefrundown.“I
guessthewholeUnseenthingcameintocreationwhileyouallweresleeping.”
“Soundsaboutright,”Kieran
muttered.
“Threethings.”Reaverheldup
threefingers.“Firstoff,Ineedmyrest.IfIdon’tgetmyrest,Iget
cranky.”
“Whosoundslikethesensitive
onenow?”Kieranfiredback.
“AndwhenIgetcranky,Ilike
tosetthingsonfireandtheneatthem,”Reavercontinued,andIbrieflyclosed
myeyes.“Secondly,thoseweren’tjustsomerandomGyrmsthatcanbeconjured
todoone’sbidding.AsIsaid,theywereSentries.”
Iopenedmyeyes.“Whatisthe
differencebetweenthem?”
Reaverstillhelduponefinger.
“Mostofthemwereoncemortal—thosewhosummonedagodandpledgedservitude
tothemupondeathinexchangeforwhateverfavorthegodgrantedthem.Hunters
huntthings.Sentries—youguessedit—guardthings.Items.Usually,people.But
Sentries,likeHuntersandSeekers,cansensewhateverthey’researchingfor.
Theyeitherfindsaidthingandbringitback,ortheydieintheprocessof
defendingit.”
Mygazeflickedbacktothe
ground.Thosethingshadoncebeenmortal?Goodgods…
Now,Ifeltalittlebadabout
killingthem.
Casteelslidhisarmaroundmy
waist,squeezing.“So,theseGyrmsweredownthereforhundredsofyears?”
Reavernodded.
“Thatmust’vebeenreally
boring,”Emilsaid.
“Again.”Vonettalookedathim.
“Understatement.”
“Anditwasn’twhateveryour
motherdidthatsenttheSentrieshere,”Reaversaid.
“Whatdoyoumean?”Casteel’seyes
narrowed.“AndcanyoupleasestopgivingKieranthemiddlefinger?”
“Iwasactuallygivingitto
everyone,butwhatever.”Slowly,Reaverloweredhismiddlefinger.“Ihavea
feelingthismountainformedasawaytoguardMalec’stomb,butthesetypesofGyrmscan’tbesummonedbyPrimalmagic.Theycanonlybesentbya
Primal.”
Slowly,Iturnedtothemouthof
thecave.“YouthinkNyktossentthem?ThatheandtheConsortknewwheretheir
sonwas?”
Reaverwasquietforalongmoment.
“WhenMalecleftIliseeum,hedidsorightbeforetheotherswenttosleep.He
didn’tleaveongoodterms,butthe…PrimalofLife,eveninsleep,would’ve
sensedhisvulnerability.Thedeityboneswould’velikelyblockedtheirability
toknowwherehewas,”hesaid,andIrealizedthatwhateverIsbethkeptIres
inlikelyhadtobethesame.“Whilesleeping,thePrimalofLifemust’ve
summonedtheSentriestoprotecthim.”
MyPrimalbadasserywasn’texactlyneededfromthere.
NomoreGyrmsappearedasweenteredthecave,cominguponthebone-smothered
casketattheend,restinghalfwayundertheearthinthecenterofachamber
thatwasbarelylargeenoughforalloftheGyrmstohavewaitedin.
Ididn’twanttothinkabout
that.AbouthowNyktoshadsoughttoprotecthisson.Reaverdestroyedthe
rootsofthebloodtreesthathadwoundtheirwayaroundthechains.Ididn’t
wanttoimaginehowhisinabilitytofindIresanddothesameforhimmust
plaguehimeverysecond,bothawakeandasleep.IthadtobewhytheConsortslept
sorestlessly.
Weleftthebonechainsonthe
casketincasethemovementstirredtheoneinside.Allofuswerequiet,listening
foranysignsoflifeasthewooden,unmarkedcasketwascarefullycarriedout
fromthecaveandplacedinthewagon.Reaverstayedwithitaswebeganour
trekbacktoPadonia.
Atfirst,Ithoughtitwasout
ofworrythatMalecwouldwakeandattempttoescape,butIsawReaverafew
times,sittingbesidethecasketwithhishandrestingontopofitandhis
eyesclosed.Andthat…thatleftmewithamessyknotofemotioninmychest.
Aswenearedtheedgeofthe
BloodForest,andCasteelandIrodebesidethecasket,IfinallyaskedReaver
whatpreyedonmymind.“WereyoufriendswithMalec?”
Hestaredatthecasketforquite
sometimebeforeanswering.“Wewerewhenwewereyounger,beforehebeganto
visitthemortalrealm.”
“Itchangedafterthat?”Casteel
askedasheguidedSettiaroundseveralpilesofrocks.
Reavernodded.“Helostinterest
inIliseeum,andthatlossofinterestbecamea…alossofaffectionforallwho
residedthere.”
“I’msorrytohearthat,”
Casteelsaid,hisgazeflickingovermyheadtowhereMalikrodebesideNaill.
Reaver’sstarefollowedhis.“It
isstrange,isitnot,thathewasnamedsocloselytoMalec?”
Ididn’tsayaword.
Casteeldid.“Mymotherloved
Malec.Ithinkapartofheralwayswill.NamingMalikwasawayto…”
“Tohonorwhatcouldhavebeen?”
“Yeah.”Casteelwassilentfora
moment.“Iwasthinkingaboutwhatyousaid.IfNyktoscouldsendSentriesto
watchoverMalec,wouldn’thehaveknownwhenMalecwasentombed?Couldn’the
havepreventedthat?”
Reaverwasquietforamoment.
“ThePrimalofLifecouldhave.Malecmusthavebeenweakenedgreatlytobe
entombed.Hurt.BothNyktosandtheConsortwould’vefeltthat.Neitherintervened.”
Istaredatthecasket,ageneral
senseofuneasereturning.Theysoughttoprotecthimbutnotfreehim.
“Doyouknowwhytheydidn’t?”Casteel
asked.
Reavershookhishead.“Idon’t,
butIimaginetheyhadtheirreasons.”
Noneofussleptallthatwell
whenwestoppedtorestthefollowingnights.Ithoughtthatweweremorethan
alittleunnervedaboutwhowasinthatcasketmorethanthecreatures
thatcalledtheBloodForesthome.Thatfeelingdidn’teaseuntilwefinally
rodeoutfrombeneaththecrimsonleavesontheninthday.
“Youthinkwe’llreachPadonia
bynightfall?”Iaskedaswerodefartherahead.
“Ido,”Kieransaidfromthe
horsethatkeptpacebesideours.
“We’llhaveadayofrestbefore
wehavetoleavefortheBoneTemple,”Casteeltackedon.
“Iwishwehadlonger—ouch.”I
leanedback,pressingmypalmagainstmysuddenlyachingjaw.
Casteelfrownedasheglanceddown.
“Whatisit?”
“Idon’tknow.”Atastegathered
inmymouth,iron-rich.“Mymouthhurts.”Iproddedatmyupperjaw—
“Ifithurts,”Casteelsaid,curling
hisfingersaroundmywrist,“thenmaybeyoushouldn’tpokeatit.”
“Thatwouldmaketoomuchsense,”
KieranremarkedasCasteeldrewmyhandawayfrommymouth.
“Idon’trecallaskingforyour
opinion,”Ishotback.
Kierangrinned.Itfaded
quickly,though
“Poppy.”Concernradiatedfrom
Casteelashisgazeflickedupfrommyhand.“Yourmouthisbleeding.”
“What?”Iranmytonguealongmy
gums.“Well,Iguessthatexplainsthetasteofbloodinmymouth.That’skind
ofgross.”
“Cas…”Kieraneyedhim.
Ifrowned,openingmysensesto
them.Theconcernhaddisappeared.“What?”
“Isityourmouthoryourjaw
that’sbeenhurting?”Casteelasked,stillholdingmywristasifheexpected
metokeeppokingmyself.
Whichwaspossible.
“It’smorelikemyjaw—theupper.
Andthepainsometimesradiatestomytemple,”Isaid.
“Anditcomesandgoes?”Casteel
changedhisgriponthereins.
Inodded.“Yeah.Itdoesn’teven
hurtanymore.AndIthinkitstoppedbleeding.”Iglancedbackathim.“Whyare
youasking?”
Onesideofhislipscurled.
“BecauseIthinkIknowwhyit’sbeenhurting.”Thegrindeepeneduntilthedimple
appeared.“Or,atleast,I’mhopingso.”
Smiling,Kieranshookhishead
asCasteelurgedSettitothesideoftheroad,slowinghimsothatEmiland
Vonettarodepastus.ThewolvenfollowingatoursidedidthesameasCasteel
drewuptowhereReaverremainedinthebackofthewagon.MalikandNaillrode
ontheotherside.
“What?”Reaverasked.
“Ihavenoidea,”Isaid.
“Gotaquestionforyou,”Casteel
started,lettinggoofmywrist.
“Great,”Reavermuttered.
Casteelwasunfazedbythe
less-than-eagerresponse.“DoPrimalshavefangs?”
Myeyeswentwide.
Reaverscowled.“Toanswerthat
random-as-hellquestion,yes.Howdoyouthinktheyfeed?”
Theotherdimplegraceduswith
anappearanceasCasteeltiltedhischindown.“That’swhyIthinkyourjaw’s
beenhurting.”
Icouldn’tsayanythingfora
fullminute.“You…youthinkI’mgettingfangs?”Iasked.
Casteelnodded.“Wedon’tget
oursuntilwe’reabouttocompletetheCulling.Ourmouthswillhurtonandoff
andbleed.It’sliketeething.”
“WhyamInotsurprisedyou
haven’trealizedthatyet?”Reavermuttered,givingushisback.
Iwasgoingtohave…fangs?
Holyshit.
Immediately,Iliftedmyhand,
andCasteelcaughtmywristoncemorewithachuckle.“Don’tmesswithyour
mouth,Poppy.”
HowcouldInot?Iwasgrowing
fangs!Iranmytongueovermygums,feelingnothingstrangethere.Sugary
amusementfilteredthroughfromCasteel,butthatwasn’ttheonlythingIfelt
asherejoinedKieran.Aspicy,smokyflavorgatheredinmythroat,too.
Myneckcranedbackasmyeyes
snappedtohis.“You’reexcitedaboutthis,aren’tyou?”
“Hell,yes,Iam.”Helowered
hisheadtomine,hisvoicelowwhenhesaid,“Icannotwaittofeelyourfangs
onmyskin.”
Warmthcreptintomyface.
“Cas—”
“Onlotsofplaces,”headded.
“Fuckinggods,”Kieranmuttered.
Casteellaughedashebrushedhis
lipsovermine.HethenexplainedwhathethoughtIcouldexpect,changingthe
subjecttosomethingabitmoreappropriate.Thefangswouldcomein,pushing
outtheotherteeth,whichwasreallygrosstothinkabout.Buthesaidthey
descendedoncetheybrokethrough.Noneofthatsoundedlikefun
“Itreallyisn’t,”Kieransaidwhen
Ivoicedexactlythat.“Caswasafuckingwhinybabythatday.”
“Yeah,well,whenyouhavetwoteeth
beingpushedout,letmeknowhowthatfeels,”Casteelshotback.
Thoughtsofmyteethoccupiedmy
mindfortheremainderofthejourney,andtherewasagoodchancethose
thoughtswouldalsohauntmydreams.Itwasn’tthatIwasdisturbedbytheidea
ofhavingfangs.Theywouldactuallymakefeedingeasier,butitwouldbedifferent.
FurtherproofofhowmuchI’dchanged.
Andwasstillchanging.
Chapter43
UponreturningtoPadonia,Malecwasplacedinthe
stables,whichwas,well,itseemedwrongsomehow,butwhereelsewouldwebe
abletoplacehim?NoonewouldwantacasketcontainingagodintheGreat
Hall.
I’dplacedIsbeth’sringbackin
thepouch,alongwiththewoodenhorse.IreallyneededtogivethatbacktoCasteel,
butasIsatontheedgeofthebedafterbathing,wearingnothingmorethana
gauzy,knee-lengthchemiseI’dfoundinthewardrobe,Iwasn’tthinkingabout
Malec,theringorthehorse.I’ddecidedtherewasnopointindressingany
furthersince…Well,sinceIwouldonlyhavetoundress.
Mystomachtumbledabit.The
faintachehadreturnedtomyjawandtemplewhileIspenttimewithTawny,but
ithadmostlydisappearedwhilebathing.Ididn’tknowiftheheadachehadto
dowiththeCullingandmegettingfangsasReaverhadsaidorwhatwasto
come.
TheJoining.
Icouldn’tletmymindwander
toofardownthatpath.NotbecauseIwasuncertainorafraid.ButbecauseI
knewifIdidthinktoomuchaboutit,Iwouldonlyworkmyselfinto
ananxiousmess.
Nooneneededthat.
I’dmanagedtodozeoffwhile
Casteelbathed,andithadbeenstrangetowakewithoutKieranthere,curled
againstmyhip.
Casteelcameoutofthebathing
chamber,dressedinhisbreeches.“Youandthosesillystrapsagain,”hesaid,
adimpleappearingashetuggedononeofthethinstraps.“Howareyoufeeling?”
“Good.”
Hearchedabrow.
Ilaughedsoftly.“I’mfeeling
okay.OnlybecauseI’mtryingnottothinkaboutthefactthatwehaveanentombed
godinourstables.”
“Yeah,Ithinkeveryoneis
tryingnottothinkaboutthat.”Hesatbesideme.
ThebreathItookwasshallow.
“WhereisKieran?”
Aslightgrinreappeared.“He’s
waitingforus.”
Mystomachtookanothertumble.
“Okay.”
Thicklasheslifted,andgolden
eyesmetmine.“Areyousureyouwanttogothroughwiththis?”
“Yes,”Isaidwithouthesitation.
“Ido.You?”
“Ofcourse.”Hedrewthestrap
upmyshoulder.
“AndKieran?”Iasked.“Hestill
wantstodothis?”
“Yes.”Thesmileplayedoverhis
lips.“That’swhyhe’swaitingforus.”
Mystomachspunagain.“Thenwhat
arewewaitingfor?”
Casteelchuckled.“Foryou.”
Istartedtostand,buthe
claspedmycheek.“What?”
“Nothing.”Hisleftpalmfound
mine,pressingourimprintstogether.“NothingexceptthatI’minlovewithyou.
ThatIwillalwaysbeinlovewithyou,fromnowuntilourlastbreaths.”
MyheartswelledasIleaned
intohim,fillingwithemotionsopowerfulanddeepthatwordscouldn’teven
capturewhatIfelt.“Iloveyou.”
Casteelkissedme,takingmy
mouthsoftlywithhis.Itwasoneofhissweetkisses.Thegentlekindthat
lefteverypartofmewarm—eventhecold,hollowparts.“Ready,myQueen?”he
whisperedagainstmylips.
“Ready.”
Wearingcloaksandwhatlittleclothingwehadon
underneath,Casteelledmeoutfromthechamberanddownabackhall.Weleft
themanorunseenthroughasetofdoorsthatledtoanovergrowngardenthat
Kirhawouldhaveenjoyed.
ItmademethinkofJasper.“Where
isJasper?”
“WithmyfatherandHisa.”
“NotVonetta?”
“Ithinkshe’swithEmil.”He
archedabrowasheledmedownthewalkway.“Something’sgoingonbetween
them,isn’tthere?”
“You’rejustnowrealizing
that?”
Hesnorted.“Betterquestionis,
hasKieranfiguredthatout?”
“Ithinkhewasjustbeginningto
whenweleftOakAmbler.”
Hisgrinkickedupanotch.
“ThoughtsandprayersforEmil.”
“Morelikethoughtsandprayers
forKieranifhetriestointervene.VonettalikesEmil.Idon’tthinkshe’ll
takeallthatkindlytoKierannotmindinghisbusiness.”
“True.”
WithCas’shandfirmlywrapped
aroundmine,weenteredtheWisteriaWoodsandwentbeyondtheinnerfortress
wall,deeperintotheforest.Thesoundofrushingwatergrewcloseraswe
wanderedthroughthetwiningvines,appearingasilverypurpleinthemoonlight.
Aswewalked,CasteeltalkedabouthowKieranandhehadmadesurethey
wouldn’tgetlostinthetunnelstheyhadexploredwhenyounger.Theyusedto
markthestonewallswiththeirinitials,andIwonderedifthatwaswhat
they’ddonenow.IfKieranhadcarvedhisnameintothetrunks,allowing
Casteeltoknowexactlywheretofindhiminthemazeofheavilyclustered
trees
Casteel’swords,hisvoice—all
ofhim—hadeasedmynervesbythetimehepartedanotherheavycurtainof
limbs.Beyondhim,Isawthatwe’dreachedthebankoftheRiverofRhain.And
thenIsawKieran.
Sittingbytheedgeofthe
river,heroseandfacedusaswewalkedoutintothenarrowclearing.Hewore
onlybreecheslikeCasteelhadonunderhiscloak.I’dseenhimshirtless
hundredsoftimes,sometimeswithoutevenastitchofclothing,butitseemed
differentnow.“Iwasbeginningtowonderifyouweregoingtosleepthenight
away.”
“Ihaveafeelingshe’dstabme
ifIallowedthat,”Casteelcommentedasthewisterialimbsfellbackinto
placebehindus.
Ishothimanarchlook.“I
didn’tmeantofallasleep.”
“It’sokay.”Kierangrinnedand
lookedupatthestar-drenchedskyaswestoppedinfrontofhim.“Ididn’t
mindwaiting.It’sbeautifulhere.Peaceful.”
Itwas,withthewaterofthe
riversoclearitlookedlikerushingpoolsofsilver,thechirpingbirdsin
thetrees,andtheheavy,sweetscentofthewisteria.WhenKieran’sgazereturned
tome,Ifeltmyheartskip.Therewasnoroomtothinkaboutanythingbutwhat
washappeninghere.Icrackedopenmysenses.WhatIfeltfromKieranwasthe
saltynuttinessofresolve.Therewasalsosomethingsweetandsoft,alittle
bubblyandsmoky.Ididn’tsenseanyuncertainty.Ifeltthesamefrom
Casteel—well,almostthesame.Therewassugaryamusement,andhefelt
hotwithadifferent,heaviersoftness—spicyandsweet.Ilookedaround.“Are
wealoneouthere?”
Kierannodded.“Noonewillget
closetous.”
Hesaidthatwithsuch
certainty,IhadafeelingIknewwhy.IturnedtoCasteel.“We’rebeing
guarded?”
“Bythewolven,”heconfirmed.“They’re
notclose.Theywon’thearorseeanything,buttheywillmakesurenoonegets
toonearus.”
Inodded.“Dothey…dotheyknow
whatwe’redoing?”
“Woulditbotheryouiftheydid?”
Kieranasked.
Ithoughtaboutthatandrealized
thatitdidn’t.Well,ifVonettawasn’twithEmilandwasamongthem,Itruly
feltsorryforher.Becausethatwouldbesoawkwardforher.“Itdoesn’t.”
Kieran’sapprovalwasaripple
ofbutterycake.“Theyseeitasagreathonortoprotectsuchatradition.”
“Oh,”Iwhispered,blushing.“I’m
gladtheyapprove.”
Casteel’slipscurvedintoa
smileashepressedthemtomyforehead.Idrewinashallowbreath,the
decadentscentofpineandlushspicesurroundingme.Hisbreathdancedovermy
lipsandthenthecurveofmycheekashedippedhisheadtospeaksoftlyinmy
ear.“Ithoughtyou’dlikeithere,withtheriverandthewisterias.”
“Ido.”
“Good.”Hekissedthespace
belowmyear.“Goingtoaskyouagain.Goingtoaskyoualot.Youwanttodo
this?”
Throatdry,Inodded.
Hislipsgrazedtheshellofmy
ear,sendingashiverthroughme.“Weneedtohearyouspeakthewords,my
Queen.”
“Yes,”Isaid,clearingmy
throat.“I’msure.”
Hepressedakisstothe
sensitivespotbelowmyearashisfingersbrushedtheskinatmythroat.He
unclaspedthehooks,andtheweightofthecloakfellaway.“Wecanstopthis
atanytime.”
“Iknow.”Thetouchofhis
fingersagainstmybareshouldersandslidingunderthethinstrapsoftheslip
sentajoltthroughmybody.
Hecurledhisfingersaroundthe
straps.“Nothingwillhappen—absolutelynothing—thatyoudon’twantto
takepartin,”hesaid,kissingtheundersideofmyjaw.“Nomatterwhatyou
thinkwemaywantorwhatyoufeelfromus.”
“Weexpectnothing,”Kieran
said,hisvoiceclose.
“Iknow.”Myheartbeatsofast,
itwasliketheflutteringwingsofawildbirdtakingflight.“I’msafewith
bothofyou.”
“Always,”Kieranconfirmed.
Casteel’slipbrushedmychin.
“Andforever.”
Aridiculoussurgeofemotion
swelledinmythroat,andwithmysenseslockeddown,Iknewthesweetrushwas
allmine.Tearscrowdedmyeyes.Ilovedthem.Bothofthem.Indifferentways
andfordifferentreasonsthatIdidn’tunderstand,butIreallydid.Andthat
knowledgeleftmealittleunsteady.
Casteel’shandslowered,and
coolairfollowedtheslip,sluicingovermychestandstomachandfartherstill
untilonlymoonlightdressedmyskin.Ishivered,butIdidn’tthinkithad
anythingtodowiththecoolair.Casteel’smouthtouchedmine,anditwasanother
sweetandsoftkiss.
Whenhismouthleftmine,he
whispered,“Youcanopenyoureyeswheneveryou’reready.”
Hesteppedback,andthatwild
flutterinmychestmovedtomystomach.Theurgetocovermyselfwasthere,but
Iresisted.WiththerebeingaqualityofunknowntohowtheJoiningworked,
somemagicthatwasn’taboutbloodorwords,Ididn’twanttodoanythingthat
mightriskitnotworking.
Ifelttheirstaresalmostasif
theywereaphysicalcaress,softandwarmand…worshipping
Inthosemoments,Iheard
nothingbutthebubblingofthenearbyriverandthenthenightbirdscallingto
oneanotherfromthetreesaboveinachorusthatfeltancient—primal—alittle
magicalandwhollytempestuous.
Myeyesopened.
IsawCasteelfirstbathedin
thesilverymoonlight.HetrulylookedasIhadalwaysbelievedagodtoappear.
Aragingstormoffleshandbone,allexquisiteanglesandlines.Hiseyeswere
poolsofhoneyedgoldastheylockedontomine,andIfeltitslippastmy
shields.Asweettastegatheredinmythroat,remindingmeofchocolate-covered
berrieswithahintofcinnamon.Hisloveandhispridefilledme,andawealth
ofemotionsswelledoncemore.
ThenIsawKieranstanding
besideCasteel,shouldertoshoulder.LiketheyhadbeenbeforeIenteredtheir
lives.Liketheyalwayswouldbe.Itookintheproud,untamedplanesofhisface
andthestrongcurveofhisbroadjaw.Hisskinwasamesmerizingsilverybrown
inthemoonlight,andheremindedmeofsomeotherworldlybeingI’dconjured
frommyimagination.Captivatingandimpressiveinbothforms,hiseyeswere
theblueofwinter,andtheglowofeatherbehindhispupilswasvibrant.My
shieldsslippedagain,andwhatIfeltfromhimwasthesameasI’dfelt
before—sweetandsoft.NotasintenseaswhatcamefromCasteel,butnoless
meaningful.NothingaboutKieranwasless.
Bothhaddiscardedtheir
clothinginthosesilentmomentswhilemyeyeshadbeenclosed.Theirbodies
showedyearsoftrainingandfightinginthelinesofmuscleandthemarksupon
theirskin.Casteelcarriedmoreremindersinthecountlessscarsthatalwaystugged
atmyheartuponseeingthem,butKieranborehisfairshare.Ihadn’tnoticed
thembefore,thefadedclawmarksacrosshischest,thelong-agohealedpunctures
nearhiswaist.Kieranwasleaner,thecutofhisbodymoreformedevenwith
Casteelonlybeginningtoputhisweightbackon.Iwonderedifithadtodo
withalltherunninghedidinhiswolvenform.Ialmostaskedbutstopped
myselfbeforeIopenedmymouth.
Kieranwouldprobablyappreciate
myself-restraint.
ThenIlookedlower.Intheback
ofmymind,Iknewthatitprobablywasn’tawisechoice.Notbecausetheywouldn’t
wantmeto,andobviouslynotbecauseIdidn’twantto,butbecauseIwas
looking.Itwasn’tlikeIhadn’tseeneitherofthemnaked,butItriedtobe
appropriateaboutitwhenitcametoKieran.
Iwascurrentlybeinghighly
inappropriateasmygazedrifteddowntheirhips,towherebothwere…well,no
lessscandalousthanI.
IknewthatCasteelwaspleased
witheveryinchofmybody—thehipsthatsomemightfindtoofull,thethighs
thatmightbetoothick,thebellytoosoft,andthescarsthatmarkedme.But
itwasclearthatneitherfoundwhattheysawdispleasing.Ormaybeithad
nothingtodowithwhattheysaworhowIlooked.Perhapsitonlyhadtodo
withwhattheyfelt.Whatweshared.Eitherway,theywere…
Goodgods.
“Alwayssocurious,”Casteel
murmured.
Mygazeflewup,myfaceheating.
OnesideofCasteel’slipscurled
upward,andIsawthehintofadimpleappearinginhisrightcheek.
“Shutup,”Irasped.
Hechuckled,butwhenhiseyes
touchedmineagain,theyaskedanunspokenquestion.
Iswallowed,hopingitwould
calmmyheartasabreezerippledthroughtheglen.Itdidn’t,butmyvoicewas
there.“I’mready.”
Bothseemedtodrawinthesame
breathandthen,together,theycametome.
Chapter44
Mylegsfeltalittlelooseasacycloneofsensations
whippedthroughme,sofastandsoever-changingIcouldonlymakesenseofa
fewofthem.Nervousnesscrashedintocuriosityandgavewaytouncertainty,
whichasharpwaveofanticipationthathadnothingandeverythingtodowith
whatmightormightnothappenthensweptaside.Itwastheentireritual.The
wholeactofjoiningouressencestogether.Wouldwefeeldifferentafterwards?
Wouldthingschange,nomatterifweendedatbloodbeingexchangedorwent
beyondthat?
Withbladeinhand,Casteel
stoppedahairsbreadthinfrontofmeasKierancametostandbehindme.Neither
ofthemtouchedme,buttheirproximityalreadywarmedmynight-kissedskin.
AsIstoodthere,Iwasreminded
ofSpessa’sEnd,whenKieranhadbeentherewhenCasteelneededtofeed.Thiswas
alotlikethen.
Exceptwewereallnakedasthe
daywewereborn.
IfIhadthoughtitwouldbe
easiertoignoreournuditywhenIwasn’tabletoseeallthenaughtybits,I’d
beenwrong.Iseemedallthemoreawareofitnow.
Casteel’sgazeflickedupand
behindme.Henodded,andthenKieran’schesttouchedmine.Mybreathcaughtat
thefeelofhim,theskinthatalwaysranhot—ofthesuddenfeelofhim
againstmylowerbackasheadjustedhisstance.
“Sorry,”Kieransaidinavoice
roughandthickthattickledthebackofmyshoulder.“It’sjustthatyou’re
beautiful,andI’m,well…”Hetrailedoff,andI’dneverheardhimsothoroughly
rattled.“I’mtryingtobehave…appropriately.”
“It’sokay,”Itoldhim,
swallowingtoeasethedrynessinmythroatasImadesuremysenseswerelocked
down.ThelastthingIneededwastoconnectwithwhateverKieranmaybe
feeling.Thatwouldn’taidinanyonebehaving.“Your…er,physicalresponseis
onlynatural,”Iadded,myfaceflaming.
Justastheshiveryawarenessof
Kieranthatcenteredoneverypartofourbodiesthattouchedwasjusta
naturalreaction.
Casteel’sgrinspreaduntilthat
infuriatingdimpleinhisleftcheekbecamevisible,andhisstareturned
downrightwicked.
KieranandIwereattemptingto
behaveappropriately.Apparently,Casteelwasn’t.Hebithislowerlip,
revealingahintoffang.
Hislackofbehavingappropriately
didn’tcomeasashock.
Atall.
Kieransighedheavily.“Nohelp
whatsoever,man.”
Laughingunderhisbreath,
Casteel’sstarefoundandheldmine.“You’lldrinkfirst,”heremindedmeinasoft
voice.Hisstareheldmine.“Frommychestfirst,andthenfromKieran’s
throat.We’lleachdrinkfromeachotherafteryou.Then,wewillbothdrink
fromyourthroat.Wewillneedtobeinconstantcontactwitheachother
onceyoustartdrinkingandthenthroughthewholething.”
Feelingmycheeksheateven
more,InoddedasIstoppedmyimaginationfromrunningwild.He’dexplainedall
ofthis.BecauseawolvencouldnottakeinbloodlikeanAtlantian,abladewas
usedtodrawtheessencefromtheAtlantian,andthemarkwasmadenearthe
heartatthecenterofthechest,roughlywhereIfelttheeatherthrobbing
restlesslyinmine.Bloodwastakenfromthewolven’sthroatbecausetheywere
aconduitofsorts,thebridgedesignedtolinkthelifespanoftheAtlantian
totheirmate.Butinourcase,tolinkhiswithours—theirswithmine.Blood
wasthendrawnatthesametimefromthestrongestone—theonewhowouldhold
bothlifeforces.
Me.
Casteel’sgazestillfastenedon
tomine,hebrushedhisfingersoverthecurveofmycheek.“Youneedtospeak
thewordsItoldyou,”heinstructedsoftly
Itookashallowbreath,recalling
themandwhattodo.“Doyou,CasteelDa’Neer,enterthisJoiningfreelyandwith
willofyourown,onlyyourown?”IaskedasIliftedmylefthand.Ittrembled
slightly.
“IenterthisJoiningfreelyand
withwillofonlymyown,”hesaid,takingmylefthandinhis.
Thenightbirdsfellsilent.
Iliftedmyrighthand.“Doyou,
KieranContou,enterthisJoiningfreelyandwithwillofyourown,onlyyour
own?”
“IenterthisJoiningfreelyand
withwillofonlymyown.”Kieran’swarmrighthandenvelopedmine,andhe
broughtourjoinedhandstothecenterofmychestwhereCasteel’sringhad
oncerestedbetweenmybreasts.
Theairstilledaroundus.
Andwiththelastwordsneeding
tobespoken—itwasonlyahandful,buttherealmseemedtohearthem—the
Primalessencestirredevenmoreasifitwerewakingupandlistening.
“Iloveyou,PenellapheDa’Neer,”
Casteelwhispered,dippinghisheadtodraghislipsovermine.“Fromthis
momenttoyourlastmoment.”
Ishudderedatwhathe’dsaid.
ThosewordshadnothingtodowiththeJoining.Theywerejustareminder.“I
loveyou,CasteelDa’Neer,”Iwhisperedthickly.“Fromthismomenttoour
lastmoment.”
Thesameshudderranthroughhis
bodyashebroughtthebladeup.Withoutlookingaway,withoutflinching,he
drewthesharpedgeacrosshischest,slicingopenhisskin.Bloodimmediatelywelled,
beading.Casteeltossedthebladeasideandthensteppedintome.Thecontact
ofhisbodyagainstmine,withKieranplantedsofirmlybehindme,andthefeel
ofCasteelrigidagainstmybelly,wasanotherstunning,sharpjolttomy
system
Myheartstartedracingagain,
beatingsofastIwonderedhowitcouldsustainsuchaspeedasCasteelplaced
hisrighthandonKieran.CouldKieranfeelitbeneathourhands?CouldCasteel
hearitpoundingaway?
Kieran’slefthandwentaround
thenapeofCasteel’sneck,andthenallthreeofuswereconnected.
Theywaitedforme,andthey
didn’thavetowaittoolong.Istretchedup,mypulseskitteringastheir
bodiesseemedtoconformtomineinawaythatalmostfeltasiftheywere
bracingme,becomingtwopillarsofsupport.SomethingIfoundironicwhenI
wouldbecometheonewhowouldsupportthem.
MymouthbrushedCasteel’s
chest,andhegavealittlejerkthatIfeltthroughoutmyentirebody.Mylips
tingledatthefirsttouch.Iclosedmymouthoverthewound,drawinghisblood
intome.
ItfeltlikeforeversinceI’d
tastedhim.Mymemoriesdidhimnojustice.Hisbloodtastedlikecitrusin
snow.Idrank,suckingathisskin,drawinghisessenceintome.
Casteel’sgroanrumbledthrough
him,vibratingagainstmybreastsandmovingtoKieran.Ifelthisheadfall
back.Thetasteofhim—hisessence—wasanawakening,afreefallrushwithout
compare.Hisbloodwaswarmandthick,heatingmyalreadyinflamedskin.Inthe
recessesofmymind,IrealizedIhadn’tevenconsideredtheeffectof
Casteel’sblood.ItwasprobablyforthebestthatIhadn’tconsideredituntil
now,untilhisbloodwaslightingupeverycellinmybody,andtheeatherin
mycheststartedtothrob.
“Poppy,”Casteelmoaned,his
chingrazingthetopofmyhead.“That’senough.”
Iheardhim,butItookandtook
untilthathidden-awayplaceinme,thecoldpart,begantowarm—
“Ifyoudon’tstop,”Casteelsaid,
hisbodytautagainstmine,“thiswillstoprighthereandendinavery
differentkindofjoining.”
Thosewordsreachedme.Flushing
atthesensualwarning,Iforcedmymouthfromhischestandliftedmygazeto
his.
Lookingathimthen,starkneed
etchedintoeverylineofhisface,didn’thelpkeepmythoughtsfocusedonthe
goalathand.Loweringmygaze,Iflickedmytongueovermylowerlip,catching
thelastdropofbloodthathadgatheredthere.
Casteelgroanedagainashis
handtightenedaroundmine.“Behave,”heorderedroughly.“Oryou’re
goingtomakeKieranblush.”
“Yeah,”camethatnot-so-dry
response.“That’sexactlywhat’sgoingtohappen.”
IhadafeelingIwastheonly
oneblushingasImovedjustalittleoutoftheway,enoughforKieranto
reachCasteel.Thepositioncausedareasofhimtocomeintocontact
withareasofme,andIdesperatelytriedtoignoreitashismouth
replacedmine.
Casteeljerkedagainashisburning,
goldeneyeslockedontomine.IcouldbarelybreatheasKierandrankfromhim,
andCasteelwatchedme,hischestbeginningtoriseandfallmorerapidly.At
first,Iwasconcernedthathewasn’treadytopartwithsomuchblood,but
whenIcrackedmysensesopenjustenough,Iimmediatelyknewthatwasn’tthe
case.
Hislustwaslikeawhirlwind,
andevenalittlebitofitwasafierceweighttobear.Hislipcurledback,
revealingmoreofhisfangsasKierandrankfromhim.Anachingpulsewent
throughmybreastsandcenteredbetweenmythighs.Casteel’snostrilsflared,
andhegrowled,lowandheated.
Ifeltalittledizzywhen
Kieranstopped,andtheycarefullyturnedmesoCasteelwasatmyback.Mylips
stilltingled,sodidmythroat,andIfeltthatsensationstartingtospread
throughmeasIslowlyliftedmygazetoKieran’s.
Kieran’sstarecapturedmine.My
heartleaptunsteadilyatthesightofthestreaksofeatherinhiseyes.He
turnedhisheadtotheside,exposinghisthroat.Casteelbentoverme,leaning
sohecouldreachKieran,leavingabsolutelynospacebetweenus.Everynerve
endingseemedtosparkallatonceatthefeelofthempressedsoinappropriately
close.TheyhadtofeelmyheartwhenitskippedasCasteelstruck,sinkinghis
fangsintoKieran’sthroat.Theyhadtofeeltheratherindecenttremorrocking
meatthesightofCasteelbitingKieran.
Attakinghisblood.
Icouldn’tevenblink.
IcouldbarelybreatheasIwatched
Casteel’sthroatworkoneachdraggingswallow.Asthetautnesswentoutof
Kieran’sface,andhislipsparted.Asthethick,hardlengthofCasteel
throbbedagainstmylowerback.
Dimly,Iwonderedhowanyonecould
possiblyremainunaffectedbythis.
Casteelliftedhishead,andthe
scentofKieran’sbloodreachedouttome.Theessenceswirledmadlyinmychest
asCasteel’sgripremainedfirmonme.Istretcheduponcemore,Kieran’sand
myjoinedhandslodgedfirmlybetweenourbodies,andthefinedustingofsoft
haironhischestthatIwould’veswornwasn’ttherebeforescatteredmy
thoughts.Hisskin…itfeltevenhotter,harder.Maybeevenalittlethinner.I
swayed.Iwasn’tsurewhy.Ididn’tfeelweak,butIwasunsteady,as
ifIwereanarrowfiredwithoutthoughtoraim.
Itrembledasmymouthclosed
overKieran’sthroat.Hisblood,thewildandwoodsytaste,wassurprisingly
complementarytoCasteel’s,andthatthoughtdrewamuffledgigglefromme.Both
oftheirhandstightenedonmine.TheyprobablythoughtIwaslosingit,butit
wasn’tmymindIwasfailingtocontrol.
ItwasmybodyasIdrankfrom
Kieran.Thefeelofhischestmovingindeep,rapidbreathsagainstmybreasts.
TherumblingweightofhimasIdrewhisessenceintome.Thehot,hardpress
ofCasteelatmyback,hisbreathonmyshoulder.Hismouththere.Hisfangs
werethereasIdrank—notpiercingmyskin,justthere.Ishuddered.Myholdon
myabilitiesslipped.Therichtasteofblood,earthyanddecadent,gotlostin
theswellofsmokyspicegatheringinmythroat.Ihadnoideawhichoneit’d
comefromorifitwasbothofthem.Ormine.
Thenightstillseemedtobe
listeningasCasteelmanagedtostopmewithatugofhisfangs.Nocoldparts
remainedinsideme,eventhoughItrembledassomeoneturnedmebacktoCasteel
oncemore.
Casteeldroppedhisforeheadto
mine.“Youokay?”heasked,hisvoiceraggedandbreathless.
Inodded,catchingthescentof
Kieran’sbloodonhisbreath.
“Needtohearyousayit,”
Kieransaid,andhesoundedjustasrawasCasteel
“Yes,”Iwhispered,myskintingling
withtheheatofCasteel’sandKieran’sblood,mybodythrobbingfromthe
warmthoftheirs.“I’mokay.”
“I’llhavetobiteyoutwice,”Casteel
said,andIremembered.Mytoesbegantocurlagainstthedamp,coolgrass.
“It’ll…beintense.”
Kieran’shand,stillheldaround
mineandagainstmychest,tightened.
Casteelkissedmequicklyand
thenwaitedformetogivehimpermissionasifhedidn’talreadyhaveit.Eyes
closed,IpressedmyheadbackagainstKieran’schest,exposingmythroatto
Casteel.
Foramoment,noneofusmoved,
andthewaitingwasalmosttoomuch.
AndthenCasteelstruckfast.I
jerkedatthepierceofhisfangs,caughtoffguardnomatterhowmuchIexpected
it.Wantedit.Itwasn’tsomethingonecouldpreparefor.Themixofall-consuming
pleasureandbitingpainwasstartling.Hedidn’tdrink,though.Hisheadlifted,
andhebitagain,sinkinghisfangsintotheothersideofmythroat.Myentire
bodyarched,pressingintobothofthem,myeyesflyingopenwideasCasteel
latchedontotheleftsideofmythroat.
AsKierandidthesame,closing
hismouthovertherightside.
Icriedoutthistime,notfrom
painbutfromthedualintensityoftheirmouthsmovingatmythroat.Itwas
toomuch.Myarmsjerkedagainstmywill,buttheyheldmyhands,keepingus
joined.Ariotofsensationshitmelikeadrenchingdownpour.Everypartofmy
bodytightenedtoalmostpainfulpoints.Theroarofbloodinmyearsabated,
andtheonlythingIheardwasthem—theirrough,needfulsoundsastheydrank.
Myeyesremainedwide,fixedon
theskyandthestarsthatseemedtocartwheelthroughthenight,growing
brighterandbrighter.
AndsodidI.
Theeatherrosetothesurface,
shadow-lacedsilverripplingfromthecenterofmychestandwrappingaround
CasteelandKieran,formingcracklingropesoflightthattwistedandtwinedtheir
wayaroundourbodies.
Onlytheirmouths,theirtongues,
movedatmythroat,andIwasn’tsureiftheycouldseewhatIdid,the
combiningofouressences.Ididn’tthinktheywereevenawareastheytookand
took,andthesilverycordsburnedbrighter.Therewassomuchheatpressed
againstmyfrontandback,burninginsideme,fillingmythroat,mychest,and
poolinginmycore.Myholdonmyabilitiesslippedandfellaway,andwhat
theyfeltjoinedthedownpour,sweepingmeupwithit.
Theirmouthsweren’ttheonly
thingsmoving.Iwas.Myhips.Mybody.Itwistedbetweenthem,softersoundsjoining
theirmuffledonesasthetipsofmybreastsdraggedacrossCasteel’schest,
andthecurveofmyrearagainstKieran’sthighs.Myfeetslippedonthegrass,
andarough,hardthighwedgedbetweenmine.Thechangeofpositionwas
startling.IfeltKierannownestledagainstme,whereCasteelhadshockingly,
wickedlytoucheddaysbefore.Ishookatthefeelofhim,andthefeelofthestrong
thighpressedagainsttheaching,swollenfleshbetweenmine.
Nothoughtguidedmyactions.No
hintofshame.Onlyinstinctasthecordscontinuedtoweavetheirwayaround
thethreeofus.IrodethethighasIsqueezedtheirhands,tighterandtighter.
Everythingwastoomuchandyetnotenough.Imoanedastheirlipsmovedonthe
skinofmythroat.Pressurecurledandcurled,andIclampedmythighsaround
theonebetweenmylegs—
Igaspedasoneorbothofthem
liftedmeuntilmytoesbarelytouchedtheground.Suddenly,itwasn’tjustthe
thighIrockedonbutthehotlengthofacockthatIslidandrubbedagainst.
Slowly,Ibecameawareofthelipsstillingatmythroatandtheirmouthsno
longerbeingthere,eventhoughIstillfelttheirdraggingpullsboththereand
inmycore.
Blinkingopenmyeyes,Isaw
thatthecracklingcordsofessencestillvibratedaroundus.
Casteel’sandKieran’schests
movedinshallowpants.Otherthanthat,theywerestill,eventhoughIfelt
theirneed.Heavyspicecloakedmyskin,mybloodpepperedwithit.Itwas
almostpainful,thecombinationofitall,andyetneithermoved.Theywere
still,evenasIrockedagainstthethigh,againstthecock,growingwetter,
knowingthattheycouldseethesilverycocoonthathadformedaroundus—knowing
thattheywatchedme,mybreasts,myhips,myfaceasKieran’schestcradledmy
head,andmyeyeslockedontogoldenones.TheywatchedaseagerlyasIhad
whentheyfedfromeachother,andanewhiddenpartofme,oneI’drecently
discovered,reveledinit—inthesensuality,thefreedom,andtheprimitivepower.
Theysimplyheldme,theirhands
firmlyinmineasIrodethenow-dampthighanderection.Theymadenomoves
becausewe…wecametoit.Theblade-sharppoint.Aline.Theedge.Wewerethere,
andIwasdancingalongit.Theystayedtherewithme,heartspoundingin
tandem,andIknewitwouldbeeasytobackawayfromit,toputastopto
this.Iknewthattheywouldremainastheywere,allowingmetoshamelesslyseek
thepleasureIwassoclosetofeeling.Iknewtheywouldfollowmyleadwherever
ittookthem
Theywaited.
Thehummingcordsofessence
snappingandcracklingarounduswaited,andgoldeneyesheldmine.My
ceaselesschurningstilled,andIknewwewerewildlydancingsparks,aliveand
onthevergeofignitinguntilwewerenothingbutfleshandfire.
AndIwantedtobethe
fire.
Iwantedtoburn.
“Yes,”Iwhispered,and
thecordsthrobbed.
Casteeltrembled.Bothofthem
did.Andneithermovedforalongmoment.Then,Casdrewourjoinedhandsto
hismouth,kissingthetop.Myrighthandwasalsolifted,Kierandoingthe
same.Itrembled.
“Fuckingunworthyofyou,”
Casteelgrowled,andbeforeIcouldtellhimanydifferently,hismouthwason
mine.
Oh,gods.
Thatkisswasunlikeanything
I’deverexperiencedbefore.Itastedmybloodonhislips.ItastedKieran’s
ashistonguesweptinsidemymouth.Hedrankfrommeashehadfrommyneckas
aroughpalmskimmedthecurveofmyhipandthenmywaist.Myhandswerestill
intheirs,andIhadnoideawhosehandtouchedme,butthecordswerestill
there.Iheardthemhissingandspinningasthatpalmtraveledupmystomach,
closingoveranachingbreast.ImoanedintoCasteel’smouth.Hislipscaptured
mycryasfingersfoundthetinglingpeakofmyotherbreast.Casteel’smouth
leftmineonlywhenIthoughtI’dsurelypassout,andthatmouthofhisblazed
atraildownmythroat,pastthebitemarksandlowerstill.Histonguelapped
atmybreast,overthefingersthere.MymoangotlostinthegroanthatIfelt
alongmyback.
Theirhandseasedfrommine,and
thecordsremained,shimmeringinthespacearoundus,betweenus,andinus.I
curledahandaroundthenapeofCasteel’sneck.Ithreadedmyarmaround
Kieran’s,pressingmyfingersintotheskinofhisbiceps.Casteeldrewthe
sensitivenubofpeakedfleshandthatfingerthathadbeentormentingthesame
skinintohismouth.Hesuckeddeeplyandhard,draggingaraggedgaspfromme.
“Fucker,”Kieran
grunted.
Casteel’slaughgavewaytoa
growlasmybodyarchedoncemore.Asahandlandedonmyhip,urgingmetomove.
Igaspedatthehairteasingtheheightenedfleshthere—atthewickedslide
alongtheheatederection.Fingersgrazedmystomach,dancingbelowmynavel
andlower.Mybreathkeptcatchingasaroughpadofafingerrolledoverthe
bundleofnervesattheapexofmythighs.ThefingertoyedasCasteel’smouthmoved
tomyotherbreast.
“Wouldn’twantthisonetogetlonely,”
hesaid,palmingthefleshandliftingittohismouth.
Kieran’shandremainedontheother,
dampfromCasteel’streatment,andIdidn’tknowwhosehandwasonmyhip,
whosefingerwasteasing,whose—
Icriedoutasthefingerslid
throughthegatheringheatandtheninsideme.Mybodyburnedasthefinger
movedinunisonwiththemouthatmybreast,andwitheachdraw,thefinger
sankintome.MyfingerstightenedaroundCasteel’shand.Mynailsduginto
Kieran’sarm.
“Oh,gods,”Ipanted.
“You’regoingtostartpraying?”
Kieranasked,hisbreathhotagainstthebitemarksonmyneck,sendingapulse
throughme.
“Maybe,”Iadmitted,andthe
fingerplungedfaster,deeper.
Casteellaughedashisheadrose.
Histonguemovedovermylips.
“Whatwouldyouprayfor?”
Kieranasked,hischeekpressedtomine.
“What—?”Casteelstolemywords
ashekissedme.“What?”
“Heaskedwhatyouwouldpray
for,”Casteelsaid,andthatfingerinsidemewasjoinedbyanother.“IthinkI
know.”
Kieran’schucklewasdarkand
sensual.Teethtuggedonmyear.“Ibetyoudo,butIwanttohearhersayit.”
“I-Ican’tbelieveyou’reasking
questions.”Igroanedasfingerstuggedatmynipple,asfingersplunged
deeper.“Youofallpeople.”
“Thisistheonlytimeanyoneelse
getsachancetoaskaquestion,”Kieranreplied,andIfeltasurprisingly
sharpnipatmyshoulderthatIstronglybelievedwashim.“Whatwouldyoupray
for?”
“Forsomethingthatcouldbring
youmorepleasurethanafinger?”Casteel’smouthtuggedonmine.“Ortwo?Or
doyouwantatonguebetweenthoseprettythighsofyours?”
Mybloodwasburningnow.
Ahotlicksoothedthestingon
myshoulder.MaybethatwasKieranatmyshoulder.Perhapsithadbeenhimatmy
mouth.WhenIopenedmyeyes,neitherwasatmyshoulderormouth.Istartedto
lookdown,butthenCasteelwasthere,hisfingerscurledaroundmychin,
liftingmymouthtohis.
Fingerscuppedmyrear,guiding
mefartherbackonthatthigh,onthatcock.Bothofthemshuddered.
“Orwouldyoupraytocome?”a
sultryvoicewhisperedinmyear.
“Ithinkthat’sdefinitelyit.”
“Idon’tthinkIlikeeitherof
youallthatmuchatthemoment,”Isaid.
“You’reaterribleliar,meyaah
Liessa,”Kieranteased.“Iknowthat’snottrue.Icanalmosttastejusthow
muchyoulikeusatthemoment.”
“That’syouroverinflatedego,”
Iresponded.BeforeIcouldsayanymore,someonetiltedmyheadback,andmy
mouthwastakeninanotherdeepkiss.
“Ithinkhejustwantstohear
yousayaninappropriateword,”Casteeladvised,anditwasdefinitelyhis
mouthonmineatthatpoint.“Cock.Aroused.Come.You’llmakehisnight.”
“Ithinkthat’syouwhowantsto
hearit,”Isaid,draggingindeepbreathswhenhislipsleftmine.
“Thatwouldnotbealie,”he
confirmed,chuckling.“Telluswhatyouwant,myQueen.”
Everythinghadstopped.The
fingers.Thekisses.Thehands.Myhips.Igaveaverymaturegruntoffrustration.
“Whatdoyouwant?”Kieran
asked.
Mynailsdugevenharderinto
hisskin,earningalaugh.“I…Iwanttocome,”Isnapped.“There.Areyou
happy?”
“Fuckingthrilled,”Casteel
said.
“Andthensome,”Kieranadded.
Myheadwastiltedagain,andatongue
sweptinsidemymouth.Ididn’tevenrealizeIwasbeinglowereduntilmyknees
hitthedampgrass.Myeyesopenedasmymouthwasreleased,andthecords…they
werestillaroundus,soblindingintheirintensitynowthatwewerenothing
morethanshadows.
Andeverythingwasgreedy.
Hands.Mouths.Tongues.Teeth.Fangs.Weweresogreedy,andthatburn
inmybloodfinallyignited.Iwasafirethathadspreadtothemandcaught.
Itrulyhadnoideawhosehands
grippedmyhipsorwhosemouthcamedownonmine,IonlyknewthatIwasbeing
guidedontoachest,thatanotherpressedagainstmyback.Onlyknewthatamouth
wasonmine,capturingmynearscreamofreliefwhenIfeltthethick,hard
heatpiercingmeasquicklyasCas’sfangshadearlier.Onlyknewthatmypalmwas
ledtoanotherrigidlength,joiningthehandalreadythere.WhatIhadasked
forfoundmequickly,hittingmeinshockwaveaftershockwave.Theharshgrunt
againstmyneck,thewaythosehandsgrabbedontome,holdingmeinplace,
toldmeIhadn’tfoundreleasealone.NorwasIalonewhenIwasstretchedonto
myside,mymouthclaimedbytheonewhoheldmefrombehind,keepingmylegdraped
overhishipastheoneagainstmychesttookmesteadily,relentlessly,andI
felloverthatedgeagain.Icould’vehadbothoftheminsidemetonight,notat
oncebutatdifferenttimes.Itcould’veonlybeenoneofthemwho’dmoved
insideme,butIknewwhorolledmeontomyback,whoselapIwasheldinwhena
darkheadandawickedmouthfounditswaybetweenmythighs,lickingand
tormenting,tastingandteasinguntilIshatteredapart.UntilIfeltahot
splashagainstmylowerback,areleasedrivenbymyfrenziedmotionsasIwas
devoured.
“Honeydew,”Casteelmurmured,
liftinghisheadasIwentutterlyboneless.
Ididn’tevenrememberbeingtaken
intoCasteel’sarmsorhowthethreeofusendeduptangled,limp,andexhausted
undertheshimmeringcords.Butwestayedthereuntilthosecordsfadedaround
usandintoourflesh,joinedbyouressences,ourbreaths,andourbodies—from
nowuntilourlastbreaths.
Chapter45
Ourskinwasslowtocoolaswelayonthegrassy
riverbank,ourbodiesbathedinmoonlight.Wewerestilltangledupinone
another,legsandarmsentwined,andIwasdrawntoCasteellikealways.My
cheekrestedonhischest,andKieran’slayonhisshoulder.
Iknewinmyheartandinmy
chest,wheretheeatherhummedsoftly,thattheJoininghadworked.Thatwas
whatallthosesilvery,glitteringcordswere,connectingustogetherfromnow
untiltheend
Noneofusspokeasthebirds
trilledsoftlytooneanother,highaboveusinthewisteriatrees.Itwasn’t
anawkwardsilencebutratheracomfortable,contentoneasCasteel’sheart
thumpedsteadilybeneathmycheek,andKieran’sagainstmyupperback.
AndasIlaytheresurroundedby
theirwarmth,witheachbreathcarryingtheirearthyandlushscents,I
searchedforanyhintofshame—orregretforbeingtheonewho’dledthethree
ofustothatlineandthendancedrightoverit,allowingfortheJoiningto
becomesomethinginfinitelymore.Inthosecalm,quietmomentswhereI
begantorealizethatourheartsbeatintandem,andourbreathsmatchedin
pace,therewasnoshame.Norwasthereatasteofregretorconfusionfromeither
ofthem.AllItastedweresoftandairythings.
Peace.
Ifelttheirpeace.
Ifeltmine.
AndIdidn’tknowifIshould
feelconflictedaboutwhatwe’dshared—actually,Idid.Itstruckmethenthat
therewasn’tanythingIwassupposedtofeel.Itdidn’tmatterwhatI
would’vethoughtorfeltayearago.AllthatcountedwaswhatIfeltnow.What
wefelt.Andthatwassomethinggood.Right.Peaceful.
Beautiful.
Casteelmovedslightly,turning
hisheadtowardmine.AsmiletuggedatmylipsasIfelthismouthbrushthe
crownofmyhead.Hisonehandwasthreadedwithmine,restingjustbelowhis
chest.Asillylittlepartofmeevenwishedwecouldstayhereonthebankof
theriver,beneaththewisterias,remaininginthissliceoftherealmthatwe
hadsomehowcarvedoutforourselvesthatnowbelongedtous
Butwecouldn’t.Theworld
waitedjustafewfeetaway,andallthethingsIwouldn’tallowmyselfto
thinkaboutearlierawaited.
Kieranmoved,easinghisarmout
fromunderCasteelandme,andthenIremembered.Itwistedatthewaist.“The
markonyourarm?”
Pausing,Kieranliftedhisleft
arm.“It’sgone,”hewhispered,turninghisarmoverasbubbly,sugarywonder
gatheredinthebackofmythroat.
Reliefwasatentativefeelingwashing
throughmeasIstaredathisunmarredskin.“Doyouthinkthatmeansthe
Joiningusurpedthecurse?”
“Idon’tknow,”Casteelsaid,
hisvoicethick.“Idon’tthinkwe’llknowunlessIsbethattemptstorenegeon
thedealandrefusestoliftit.”
“Whichmeanswestillneedto
bringherMalec.”MygazeliftedtoKieran’s.
Henodded.“Iknowyoudon’t
wanttowaitandsee,”hesaid,andhewascorrect.“ButIthinkitmeanswe
havetocontinueasplanned.”
“Justtobesure.”Ibitdownon
mylowerlipasIlaidmyheadbackonCasteel’schest.IknewtheJoininghad
worked.We’dallseenthesilvercords.ThemarkwasgoneonKieran’sskin,but
nooneknewifaJoiningcouldcounteractthepowerofaPrimalcurse.“Do
eitherofyoufeeldifferent?”
Casteelclearedhisthroat.“I
didfeel…tingly.”
Mybrowsknitted.“I’mnotsure
ifthat’saseriousansweroryoujustbeingindecent.”
“WhenamInotbeing
indecent?”Casteelaskedwithachuckle.
“That’sagoodpoint,”Kieran
said,restinghishandonmyshoulder.“ButIthinkthisisararetimewhenhe
wasonlybeingslightlyindecent.BecauseIknowwhathe’stalkingabout.I
felt…tingly,too.Allover.”
“Whenthecordswerewrapped
aroundus,”Casteeladded,turninghisheadtowardmine.“Ifeltitinsideme.
Warm.”Hepaused.“Tingly.”
Igrinned.“Andhowaboutnow?”
“Normal,”Kierananswered.
Casteel’sthumbsweptoverthetop
ofmyhand.“Indecent.”
“So,nodifferent?”Isurmised.
“Nope.”
Kieran’shandslippedfrommy
shoulderashesatupfarther,stoppingtodropakisswherehishandhadbeen
beforerising.Thesweetnessoftheacttuggedatmyheart.Iliftedmycheekjust
enoughtoseehimwalkingtowardtheriver.“What’shedoing?”
Casteel’sarmlifted,curling
aroundmyshoulders,replacingthelackofheatIfeltduetoKieran’sabsence.
“Ithinkhe’sgoingforaswim.”
MyeyeswidenedasKierandid
justthat.Walkedstraightoutintotherushingwateranddoveunder,
resurfacingafewsecondslater.“Thatwaterhastobesocold.”
“It’snotthatbad.”Kieranlooked
overhisshoulderatusasglisteningwatercourseddownhisneckandspine.
“Youtwoshouldtryit.”
Ishookmyhead.
“Thanks,butIreallydon’tneed
allmyfunbitsfreezingoff,”Casteelrepliedashetrailedlittlecircles
overmyshoulderandupperarm.
“Cowards,”Kierantauntedashe
wadedoutfarther.
Casteelchuckled.“Poppywill
getupsetifherfavoritepartofmebecomesdamaged.”
IrolledmyeyesasKieran
laughed.“You’reridiculous,”Imuttered.
“Butyouloveme.”Casteel
rolled,shiftingmeontomybackashalfhisbodycamedownovermine.“And
especiallyallmyridiculousness.”
Iplacedmyhandonthecenter
ofhischest.“Ido.”
Thedimpleonhisrightcheek
appearedashecaughtalockofmyhairandtuckeditbackfrommyface.“How
areyoufeeling?AndI’mnotaskingifyou’retinglyinside.”
“Ifeel…normal.”Ireachedup,
curlingmyfingersintothesoftstrandsofhishair.
“Couldusealittlemoredetail,
myQueen.Whatdoesnormalmeanforyou?”
“ItmeansIfeelokay.Notregretful.”
Itrailedmyfingersacrosshisfacetothesmallindentinhisrightcheek.“I
don’tfeelashamed.I’mrelievedwedidtheJoining.Ipraythatitworked,and
I…Ienjoyedallofit.”
Casteel’seyessearchedmineintently.
“I’msofuckinggladtohearthat.”
“DidyouthinkI’dregretit?”
“Ididn’tthinkyouwould—orat
leastIhopednot,”hetoldme,hisvoicequietashetracedthelineofmy
jaw.“Thinkingaboutsomething,andthendoingit,andthenfeelingit
afterwardarethreeverydifferentthings.”
Hewasright.“Andyou?”
“HowdoIfeelaboutitall?”
Loweringhishead,hekissedthebridgeofmynose.“You’reaskingwhenyou
alreadyknow?”
Imushedmylipstogether.
Casteelchuckled.“Ifeel
honored,meyaahLiessa.Humbled.”Hislipsbrushedthecornerofmine.
“Awed.Relieved.Chosen.Yes,Ifeelchosen.Loved.”Henippedatmylowerlip,
sendingaboltofheatthroughme.“Intrigued.”Liftinghishead,Isaw
thattheotherdimplehadtakenform.“Butbacktothattinglypart.”Hedrew
hishanddownmyarm,grazingthecurveofmybreastwiththetipsofhis
fingers.“Areyoufeelingthat?”
“I’malwaysfeelingthatwhenit
comestoyou.”
“Knewit,”hemurmured,kissing
meoncemore.Thisonewaslonger,deeper,andlanguid.“I’mthinkingabout
temptingfatewithfreezingmyinterestingbitsandjoiningKieran.Comewith?”
Ishookmyhead.“IthinkI’ll
stayrighthere.”
“Yousure?”
“Yes.”Whenhehesitated,Igave
himalittleshove.“Go.”
Dippinghishead,Iopenedfor
himandgotlostenoughinhispartingkissthattakingadipinthefrigid
watersdidn’tsoundlikeabadidea.Casteelrose,stoppingtopickuponeof
thediscardedcloaks.Heknelt,motioningformetositup.AsIdid,hedraped
itovermyshoulders,pullingthehalvesclosedaroundme.
“Bytheway,”hesaid,tucking
hisfingersundermychin,“you’rebeautifulwhenyou’relikethis,wrappedin
nothingmorethanacloak.Asbeautifulasyouarewhenyou’redrapedinfine
silksanddressedinbreechesandatunic.Andtonight,whenyoumovedbetween
us?Whenyouopenedyourselftous?”hesaid,andmybreathcaught,“andyouressence
spilledoutfromyou,surroundingus?Enteringus?Enteringme?Ifelt
worthyofsuchabeautifulgiftasyou.”
Tearsfilledmyeyesashekissed
mesoftly.Icouldn’tspeakashestraightened,andIwatchedhimwalkintothe
river,joiningKieran.Blinkingbackthedampness,Icurledmyfingersaround
theedgesofthecloakandbroughtittomychin.IwatchedCasteelandKieran,
standingwaist-deepinthewater,andhopedbothknewjusthowworthythey
were.
HowluckyIwas.
AndasIpulledthecloaktighter,
desperatelyignoringthehollownessslowlyreturninglikeanunwantedvisitor,
IprayedtogodsthatsleptthatIwasworthyofthem.
Iwokeatdawnthefollowingday,wrappedtightlyin
Casteel’sarms.Itwasn’tlongbeforeheeasedmeontomybackandwecame
togetherslowly,kissingandexploringasifwehadallthetimeintheworld.
Wedidn’t.
Aclockwascountingdown,
tickingawayminutesandseconds,butasthecool,grayraysofdawnseepedinto
thechamber,wecherishedeachofthoseheartbeatsdeeply.
“Whenwillyouspeaktoyourfather?”
IaskedasIsatonthebed,eyesclosedasCasteeldraggedthebrushthrough
myhair.
“Soon,”heanswered.
Iarchedabrow.“Weleavefor
theBoneTempleinafewhours,soIhopesoonisactuallysoon.”
“Itwillbe.”Hegentlyworked
thebrushthroughatangle.“Howintheworlddidyourhairgetsoknottedfrom
walkingahandfuloffeet?”
Isnorted.“ThatisaquestionI
haveaskedathousandtimes.”
Hislaughwassoftandsweet,
andIsmiled,lovingthesoundasmuchasIlovedhim.Hewasquietashe
managedtountanglethehairandthenmovedontoanothersection.“Myfather
isnotgoingtobehappywithwhatwehavedecided.”
No,hewouldnotbe.
Afterreturningfromthebanks
oftheRiverofRhain,we’dspentthebetterpartofyesterdaymorninginbed,
sleeping…anddefinitelynotsleeping.Thenwefinallymanagedtodo
theresponsiblethingandmeetwiththegeneralstodiscussourplansinmore
detail.CasteelandIhaddecidedonsomethingsthathadneededtobeshared.
NoneofusknewwhatIsbethtruly
plannedorwhatshewascapableofasademis,andsinceIwasdaysorpossibly
weeksawayfromcompletingtheCulling,Iwas—asmuchasitateawayatCasteel
toacknowledge—notinfallible.Icouldbegravelywounded…orworse.Whichalso
meantthatCasteelandKieran…
Themerethoughtofthatmademe
wanttohurl,butitwasareality.Andbecauseofthat,italsomeant
leadershipneededtobeinplace.Thankfully,therealreadywas.
VonettawastheCrown
Regent.
IntheeventthatneitherCasteel
norIcouldrule,Vonettawouldascendthethrone.Sheneededtobehealthyand
wholeforthattooccur.So,CasteelandIhad…assertedourauthorityandordered
VonettatoremainatPadoniawithadecentforceofaboutfiftythousand
soldiers.Ofcourse,shehadnotbeenatallpleasedtohearthat,butwhenthe
realityofwhatitmeanthither,shehadappearedasifshe’dneededtosit
down.
Itwasn’ttheshockofrealizing
thatshewouldruleAtlantiathathadhertakingseveralshortbreaths.Itwas
therealizationofwhatwouldhavetooccurtocausethat.
AndCasteelwould,asKieranhad
putitwhenwe’dspokentohimaboutwhatwe’ddecided,pullrankagainwhenit
cametohisfather.
“Finished.”Casteellaidthe
heavylengthofhairovermyshoulderashebent,kissingthenapeofmyneck.
“Thankyou.”
“Mypleasure.”Heclimbedoff
thebedwithalevelofgraceIwouldnevermaster,probablynotevenasa
Primal.
Mygazeroamedthedefinedlines
ofhischestandstomachashepulledontheblacktunicthatwouldbeworn
underarmor,relievedtoseethathehadfilledoutevenmore.Inadayorso,
Iimaginedhewouldbebacktohisnormalweight.Whatmybloodcoulddofor
himwasreallyamiracle.
HereturnedtowhereIsatto
putonhisboots.“I’mgoingtotalktohimnow.”
“Doyouwantmewithyou?”Iasked.
Casteelshookhishead.“Probably
bestifyou’renot.”Heglancedatmeashetightenedthebucklesonhisboots.
“He’llprobablywanttobringuptheshitheandmymothershould’vesaidages
ago.ThenI’lllookatyouandthinkabouthowdifferentlythingscould’vegone
forusifwehadknownthetruth,andthenI’llwanttopunchhim.”
“Don’tpunchyourfather,
Casteel.”
Afaintgrinappearedashe
movedontohisotherboot.“Isthatanorder,myQueen?”
“Itreallyshouldn’thavetobe
one.”
“But?”
“Yes.”
Heleanedover,stealingaquick
kiss.“Kieranwillbewithme.Hewon’tletmepunchhim.”
ThinkingofhowKieranhadletCasteel
repeatedlypunchhisbrother,Iwasn’tsosureaboutthat.
“Meetyouinthereceiving
hall?”Casteeltouchedmycheek.Inodded,andthiskiss…itwaslongenoughto
leavemewishingwehadmoretime.
AfterCasteelhadleft,I
braidedmyhairandrose,puttingonsimilarattireashehaddressedin.The
leggingswerealmostasthickasbreeches,andItuckedtheblackshirtinto
them,optingforavestbrocadedingoldtowearoverit.Strappingthe
wolven-bonedaggertomythigh,IsmiledasIthoughtabouthowill-fitting
IsbethwouldbelievetheclothingtobeforaQueen.Ididn’tdonanyarmoror
removethecrownsfromtheirbox.Thatwouldcomelater.Leavingthechamber,I
madeaquickstopinthekitchens,grabbingamuffin,andthenroamedoutside,
givingCasteelampletimetospeaktohisfather.
IcaughtsightofThadperched
ontheRisethatoverlookedthestables,hiswingstuckedclosetohisnarrow,
brownish-blackbody.Ifollowedhiswatchfulstare,myheartskipping.
Finishingoffthemuffin,Icrossed
theovergrowncourtyardandenteredthestables.Onlyafewhorsesremained
inside,asmostwerewiththesoldiers,beingoutfittedwitharmor.Istopped
togiveSettiasugarcubeandshowerhimwithaffectionbeforewalkingtothe
backofthestructure.StrawcrunchedundermyfeetasIreachedout,holdingthe
poleasIturnedthecorner.
Malec’swoodencasketremained
inthewagon,readytobeledouttheclosedstabledoorsbehindit.Several
lengthsofdull,whitish-grayboneslayacrossthetop,andIrealizedthat
severalbonespurshadembeddedthemselvesinthewood.
Foldinganarmovermywaist,I
suppressedashiver.Thecasket.Malec’spresence.Ithadanimpactthatwas
hardnottonotice,chillingtheair.Tinygoosebumpsroseallovermyskin.I
inchedcloser,holdingmybreathlikeasillychildasIreachedout,pressing
mypalmagainstthecasket.
Thewoodwaswarm
Ipulledmyhandback,pressing
itagainstmychestwheretheeatherhummed,andthecoldplaceinsidemeached.
Wouldthewoodthatentombedme
becold?
Isuckedinasharpbreath,unsettled
bymydarkthoughts.Malec’sfatewasn’tmine—
Unsheathingthedaggeratthe
softcrunchofstraw,Iwhippedaround.
Malikstoodinthehalloutside
thestall,hiseyeswidebehindalockofsandybrownhairthathadfalleninfront
ofthem.“Jumpy?”
“I’drathercallitcareful,”I
said,loweringthedaggerbutnotputtingitaway.Nooneelsewaswithhim.
“You’reoutherealone?”
“Notsupposedtobe.”A
half-grinappeared,onesosimilartoCasteel’sitwasalittlebizarre.“But
I’mreallygoodatbeingwhereI’mnotsupposedtobe.”
“Uh-huh.”
“I’msureNaillwillrealizesoon
enoughthatI’mnotinmycell—er,Imeanmychambers,”heamended.
Iwatchedhimdrawcloser.“Why
areyououthere?”
“Sawyouheadingthiswayfrom
thewindow.”HestoppedatthebackofthewagonanddidthesameasIdid,placing
hishandonthecasket.Heshowednoreactiontothetemperature,whichmademe
wonder.
“Doesthewoodfeelwarmtoyou?”
Heshookhishead.“Doesitto
you?”
Istartedtoanswerbut
shrugged.“Ihopeyouaren’toutheretryingtodosomethingtohiminan
attempttostopus.”
Maliklaughedroughly.“Can’t
sayithasn’tcrossedmymind.”
“You’driskKieranlikethat?”I
demanded,mystomachtopplingbecauseIhated—absolutelyhated—the
wholewait-and-seethingsurroundingwhetherornottheJoininghadusurpedthe
curse,orifIsbethwouldliftit
“Allmannerofthingshave
crossedmymind,”heanswered.“ButIprefertonotbeburnedalivebya
draken.”
“Thatshouldn’tbetheonly
thingthatstopsyou.”
“No,itshouldn’tbe.Andit
wouldn’thavebeenbefore,”hesaid,andIknewhemeantbeforetheBloodQueen
capturedhim.“ButI’mnotthesamepersonIwasthen,”hesaid,andthefaint
tangofsadnessgatheredinmythroat.
“You’reapersonwhowould
sacrificethosewhocareaboutyounow?”
Hislipstwistedintoamockery
ofasmile.“WhowouldyouhavesacrificedtofreeCasteel?”
“Isacrificednone,”Itoldhim.
Maliklookedatme.“You
didn’t?”
Istiffened.“Iwillfreemy
father.”
Alongmomentpassed.“Butyou
andIbothknowthatifyouhadtochoose,therewouldbenochoice.”Hisgaze
flickedtothecasket.“Tobehonest,I’mrelievedtohearthat.Casteeldeserves
someonewhowillburntherealmforhim.”
“Andyoudon’t?”
Heletoutadrylaugh.“Isthat
aseriousquestion?”
Istudiedhiscoollyhandsome
features.“Yousubjectedyourselftodecadesofthegodsonlyknowwhatfor
Millicent.Wouldshenotdothesameforyou?”
Maliklaughedagain,andthis
time,itwasreal.“No.She’smorelikelytosetmeafirethanarealm.”
Mybrowsflewopen.“Yousaid
youwereheartmates—”
“Weare.”Heangledhisbody
towardme.“Butshedoesn’tknowthat.”
Confusionrose,andthenI
rememberedhimsayingthathe’ddoneunimaginablethingsthatshewouldnever
knowabout.“Howdoesn’tsheknow?”
“Shejustdoesn’t.”
“Thenhowdoyouknow?”
Hisheadinclined.“Youaska
lotofquestions.”
“SoI’vebeentold.”
“Hasanyoneevertoldyouthat
askingquestionsisasignofintelligence?”
“Ihaven’tneededtobetold
that,”Isaid.“BecauseIalreadyknow.”
Maliksmiledthen.“Ijust
know.”
SensingthatIwouldn’tgetmuch
moreoutofhimaboutthatsubject,ImovedontothingsIwasmorecurious
about.“DoyouthinkMillicentwillbetherewithIsbethwhenwemeetwith
her?”
Hisshoulderstightened.“Gods,I
hopenot.Butsheprobablywillbe.Isbethwilllikelydemandherpresence.”
InibbledonmylowerlipasI
staredatthebonechains.“Whyhasn’tMillicenttriedtostopher?”
“Whatmakesyouthinkshehasn’t?”
Malikcountered.“You’veseenwhatIsbethcando.Millieisstrong,she’sfierce,
butsheisnotademis.”
Hehadapoint,but…“Thenwhy
didn’tshetrytokillme?ShebelievesI’mtheHarbinger,right?Shehadan
opportunity,asdidyou—especiallywhenIwasyounger.”
“Milliehasnevertriedtoconvince
herselfthatshecouldkillachildorhersister.”Malik’sstarebore
throughme.“Sheisnoteviljustbecauseshe’sIsbeth’sdaughter.”
ButtheyapparentlythoughtI
was.“Andwhataboutyou?Youwereevilenoughtothinkyoucoulddoit.”
“Iwasdesperateenough.”Malik
paused.“AndbrokenenoughthatIlatchedontoanypurpose.”
IrememberedwhatCasteelhad
saidtohim.“Yourbondedwolven?Preela?Howdidthatbreakyou?”
“Jalarakilledherinfrontof
me,”heansweredsoflatlythatIalmostthoughttheswirlofgriefwasmine.
“Itwasn’tquickorhonorablewhatheandtheothersdidtoher.”Hefacedme.
“Andyoudon’thavetoaskwhatthatwas.Youcarryapartofherwithyou.You
holditinyourhandevennow.”
Slowly,Ilookeddownatthe
bloodstonedaggerIheld—thewolven-bonegripthatneverwarmedtomy
touch.“No.”
Maliksaidnothing.
Mygazeflewtohis.“Howwould
youevenknow?”
“Isaweachonemadeofher
bones.Iwillneverforgetwhattheylooklike.”
Atremorranthroughmyhand.
“AnditwasgiftedtoCoralena,
whointurn,gaveittoLeopold,”hecontinued,amuscletickingunderhis
temple.“Howyoucameintopossessionofitafterward,Iamcurioustoknow.”
“Viktergaveittome,”I
whispered.“Hewasaviktor,too.”
Maliksmiledtightly.“Well,it
soundslikefatetome,doesn’tit?”
Chapter46
Casteel
Fromthewindowofthereceivinghall,Iwatched
severalsoldiersridingtowardtheRisetojointherestofthearmiesoutside
Padonia’sgates.
Twohundredthousandmenandwomen
preparedtoendthiswar.Readytofight.Readytodie.Theweightoftheir
loyaltyanddeterminationsatheavieronmyshouldersandchestthanthearmor
Inowwore.
Kieransilentlyjoinedmeatthe
window,hisshoulderbrushingmine.Iglancedathim.Hewasdressedinblack
trimmedingoldbutwithoutthearmor.He’dtrimmedhishairatsomepoint
sinceI’dlastseenhim.Mygazedroppedtohisarm,wherethecuthadbeen.
TheJoininghadworked.AscloseasKieranandIhadalwaysbeen,ourhearts
hadneversharedthesamebeat,notevenwiththebond.Buthaditusurpedthe
curse?
Thekickinmyheartechoedin
his.Helookedatme.“DoIwanttoknowwhat’sonyourmind?”
Hedidn’tneedtoknow,asIwas
sureitalreadypreyedonhismindenough.
Iturnedbacktothewindow.“I
wasthinkingabouthowIwanttoseeeverysingleoneofthesesoldiersliveto
seetherealmatpeace.”Thatwasn’talie.“ButIknownotallwill.”
Henodded.“I’dtellyouthe
samethingI’vetoldPoppy,butyoualreadyknowwhatthatissinceyouwere
theonewhotoldmewhenwefirstleftAtlantia.”
Iknewwhathespokeof.“You
cannotsaveeveryone,butyoucansavetheonesyoulove,”Isaid.“Andhowdid
Poppyrespondtothat?”
Onesideofhislipsrose.
“You’rehere,aren’tyou?”
“Asareyou.”
“Exactly.”Therewasapause.“I
summonedyourfatherasyouasked.Hecomesnow.Youstillplantopullrank?”
Inodded.
“He’snotgoingtolikeit.”
“Iknow,buthewillhaveto
dealwithit.”Takingadeepbreath,Iturnedasmyfatherenteredthe
receivinghallalongwithLordSven,hishelmethewouldn’tneedtuckedunder
hisarm.
“Youcalledforme?”myfatherasked,
andthelinesatthecornersofhiseyesseemeddeeperthantheyhadbeeneven
thedaybefore.
Itwasasurrealfeelingtobethe
onesummoningmyfather.
Kieranturnedtostandshoulder
toshoulderwithmeasIsaid,“There’ssomethingthatIdidn’tdiscusswith
youyesterday.”
Myfatherinclinedhishead,but
thesuddennarrowingofSven’seyestoldmethedamnmanhadagoodideawhatI
wasabouttosay.Hisjawtightened,buthegaveaquick,curtnodthatmy
fatherdidn’tsee.
“TheQueenandI…”Istarted,
andmyfatherimmediatelytensedattheformaluseofourtitles.BeingKing
forsolong,heknewthatwhatIwasabouttosaybrookedlittleroomforargument.
“HavedecidedthatwithNettaremaininginPadoniaasregent,shewillneed
strongleadershiptostandbesideher.”
Tworedsplotchesappearedon
hischeeks.“Cas—”
“Someonetheremainingarmiesand
thepeopleofAtlantiatrust,”Icontinued,myvoicehardeningasIheldhis
stare.“AndthattheregentcanleanonforsupportifneithertheQueennorI
isabletorule.”
Myfathersuckedinasharp
breath,thosesplotchesrapidlydisappearing.
“Youknowthat’spossible,”I
said.SomethingIhatedtoevenacknowledge,butitwasaharshreality,nonetheless.
Poppyhadn’tcompletedherCulling.Technically,shewasstillagod,andgods
wereeasiertokillthanPrimals.Ifshewerestruckdown,KieranandIwould
godownwithher.
Hell,Iwouldgodown,evenif
weweren’tJoined.
“Ofcourse,itisapossibility,”
myfatherstated.“Butthere’sJasper.”
“Jasperhasneverledanyofthe
armies,”Svenintervened.“Yes,hehasthetrustofthepeopleofAtlantia,but
he’snotinapositiontoleadanyarmiesthatremain.”
Amuscletickedinmyfather’s
temple.“AndyouthinkI’mworthyofthattrust?”heaskedme.
Istiffened.“Ibelieveyouwould
guidetheregenttowardwhatisbestforthekingdomandwouldn’tbefoolish
enoughtorepeatyourmistakes.”
HeglancedatKieran.“Your
advisorshouldremain—”
“Ifourfailureonthefield
occurs,Kieranwon’tbeabletosupporttheregent,”Icuthimoff.
Understandingflaredinhis
eyes,asdidabitofrelief.HeknewwhatI’dmeant,andhealsoknewthatI,
alongwithKieran,wouldbeaffordedmoreprotectionthananyoneonthatbattlefield.
“Iamtoremainwhilebothmysonsrideintobattle?”
“Yes,”Isaid.“Asitshould
be.”
Hewasquietforalongmoment,
andthenheexhaledaraggedbreath.“Ifthisisanorder,thenIwillobey.”
Myheadtilted.“Youdon’t
reallyhaveachoice.”
Hisshoulderstensed.“Answer
onething,asasontohisfather.Isitonlythetrustofthepeopleandmy
experiencethathasguidedthisdecision?”
MyfatherandIneededto
discussalotofthingsoncewesawthiswartotheend.Andeventhoughweplanned
forthepossibilitythatwewouldn’tsucceed,wedidsoonlybecausethatwas
whataresponsibleQueenandKingdid.However,nopartofmedidn’tbelieve
therewouldbeanafter.Still,IsaidwhatIneededtosayanyway.“You’rethe
onewhotaughtmethatIcannotsaveeveryone,”Ibegan.“ButIcansavethose
Ilove.”
PoppyenteredwithTawnyandVonettanotlongafterthe
meetingwithmyfather,butIonlybecameawareofherbecausemyheart
stuttered.Iwasn’tsureifthatcamefromKieranorme.Becausehetoostared
asIdid.
Herthickbraid,thecolorof
wine,layoverthearmorfittedfromtheshoulderstothehips.Greavesprotected
herthighsandshins.Thehiltofaswordwasvisible,restingaboveherleft
hip.Nothingwasdifferentaboutherarmororthewhitemantledrapedacrossher
back.NospecialembellishmentsormarksoutsideofthegoldenAtlantianCrest
painteduponthebreastplateofallourarmor.Butnoonelookedasregalas
shedid—orasstrong.
PoppylookedlikeaGoddessof
War—no,aPrimalofWar.
Adartofpure,unadulterated,
andred-hotlustclenchedmystomachatthesightofhercrossingbeforethewindows
liningthehall.Thefeelingwasalmostaspowerfulasthewaveofrespect.
EverystepshetookwassteepednotintheconfidenceofaQueenbutthatofa
soldier,onewho,likehersoldiers,waspreparedtofighttothe
death.
Thecornersofherlipscurved
upjustalittleashereyeslockedonmine,andafaintblushcreptacrossthe
scaronhercheek.Ididn’teventrytohidewhatIfelt.Iwantedhertoknow
justhowfuckingmagnificentIknewhertobeasIcrossedtheremainingdistance
betweenus.
Takingherhandsinmine,Ibent
somymouthwasatherearasIwhispered,“Iwanttofuckyouinthisarmor.
Canwemakethatpossible?”
Thecatchofherbreathbrought
asmiletomyface.“Thatmaybeuncomfortableforyou.”
“Worthit.”Ikissedthescar
alonghertempleandstraightened.“Ispoketomyfather.”
Thepinkbegantofadefromher
cheeks,butherheartstillpounded.Asdidmine.AsdidKieran’s.“Howdidhe
takeit?”
“Aboutaswellasyou’dexpect,”
Itoldher,glancingatthecigarboxNettaheld.
“BetterthanIthought,”Kieran
said,comingtoourside.Hereachedover,tuggingonthetailofPoppy’s
braid.Shesenthimagrin.
“Ihopethat’strue,”Netta
said.“BecauseI’mtheonewho’sgoingtobestuckwithhimfortheforeseeable
future.”
“Whatdoyouhaveinthatbox?”
Iasked.
Tawnyarchedabrow.“Iwas
wonderingthesamething.”
“Thecrowns,”Nettaanswered,
holdingtheboxforme.“Poppyleftwithoutthem.I’mnotsureifsheactually
forgotorifitwasintentional.”
Poppyliftedashoulder.
“Oh.”Tawny’seyeswidened,and
Inoticedthatabitofcolorhadbeguntofillthem.“Ihaven’tevenseen
them.”
Iliftedthelid,andTawny’ssoft
inhalefollowed.Thegoldenbonessatsidebyside,gleaminginthesunlightstreaming
inthroughthewindow.
“They’rebeautiful.”Tawny
lookedupatPoppy.“Iwouldwearthateverydayandnight.Eventobed.”
MybrowroseasIrealizedthat
Ihadn’tmadelovetoPoppyyetwiththecrownuponherhead.Aslowsmile
begantocreepacrossmyface.Poppy’sgazeshottomine.
Kieransighed.“Youhave,likely
unintentionally,givenCasideas.”
“I’mcuriousabouttheseideas,”
TawnyremarkedasItookoutonecrown.
“No,you’renot,”Poppyquickly
said.
“Holdstill,”Imurmuredto
PoppyasIplacedthecrownuponherhead.“Perfect.”
TawnywatchedPoppyliftthe
remainingcrown.“Aretheymadeofactualbones?”
“Theyare,”Ianswered.
“Forreal?”Tawnydidn’tappear
asenamoredwiththecrownsasshehadafewmomentsbefore.
PoppycringedasIloweredmy
head.“Itrynottothinkaboutthat.”
“Whosebonesarethey?”she
asked.
“Idon’tthinkanyoneknowsthe
answertothat,”Kieransaid.“Allweknowisthatthey’renotdeitybones.
Somebelievethey’rethebonesofagod.”
“OraPrimal,”Nettaadded.“But
theyonlyrevealtheirtrueappearancewhenadeityorgodsitsuponthe
throne.”Shepaused.“OraPrimal.”
Poppyplacedthecrownonmy
head.“There,”shewhispered,hereyesglimmeringasherhandslingeredfora
moment.Oureyesmet,andthewholedamnrealmfellaway.“Now,it’sperfect.”
Emotioncloggedmythroatand
seizedmychest.Itwasn’tthecrownuponmyheadthatworkedmeoverbutthe
handsthathadplaceditthere.
Ahornblewfromoutsidethe
Rise.ItouchedPoppy’scheekandthensteppedback,givingherafewmoments
withNettaandTawnybeforeitwastimetopartways.Myfatherreappeared,
joiningNettaandTawnyaswewalkedoutsidewhereourhorseshadbeenreadied
forus,andNaillandEmilwaitedwiththewolven.ThegraysteednexttoSetti
wasofhisbloodline.PhobashadbeennamedaftertheGoddessofPeaceandVengeance’s
warhorse.I’dbeensurprisedtoseehimhere,buthewouldmakeafinehorsefor
Poppy.
Anotherhornblew,and
white-and-goldbannersliftedallalongtheroadleadingtothegatesof
Padoniaandbeyond.Thethreeofusstoppedatthetopofthestairs.Thewolven
bowedtheirheadsasalowrumbleechoedfromthewisteriatrees.Unableto
stopmyself,Ilookedup.FourshadowsfelloverthelinesofsoldiersasPoppy
reachedbetweenus,takingKieran’sandmyhandsinhers.
“Frombloodandash,”Ishouted,
liftingthehandjoinedwithPoppy’s.Peopleechoedthewordsthroughthetown
andthevalley.
Poppylookedupatmeandthen
facedthecrowdassheliftedthehandthatheldKieran’s.“Wehaverisen!”
Poppy
Thetwo-dayridetotheBoneTemple,whichtookus
throughanarrowsectionoftheBloodForest,wasmostlywithoutincident.
TherewereCravenattacks,buttheyhadbeendealtwithquicklyasGeneral
Murinandhisforcesrejoinedus,alongwithLa’Sere’sdivision,havingridden
fromWhitebridgeandThreeRivers.
Ourarmieshadcampedjust
outsidetheBloodForestforthenight,andasthemoonlightlituptheceiling
ofthetent,Casteeldrankfromtheveinatmyneck,andI,uponhisreassurance
thathehadrecoveredenough,tookbloodfromthecuthemadeonhischest.The
intimateacthadbecomeasnaturalasbreathing,andthere’dbeennohesitation
asheguidedmylipstowherehisbloodwelled.
Andhistaste…
Likealways,itwasbright,like
citrusinthesnow,anditheatedmyveinsalongwiththathollowplaceinside
ashemovedovermeandtheninsideme,hisbloodonmytongue,andmynamea
whisperonhislips.Ifellasleepwrappedinhisarmsandwokeinthemiddle
ofthenight,disorientatedfromthedreamI’dhad.Ionlyrememberedbitsand
piecesofit.Thebackofawomanwearingacrownofblackdiamondsonher
silveryhair,sittingonathronemuchliketheoneI’dseenattheTempleof
Nyktos.Shehadbeenweeping.Therewasalsoamanwithsandy-blond
hairstandingtoherleft.Somethingabouthimwassofamiliar.Hehadbegunto
turnandspokejustaword.ButIwokebeforeIcouldseehisface.
Still,thesadnessofthedream
gatheredliketartaleinmythroat.Thewoman…IthadbeentheConsort.Iknew
it.Andtheman…
Hehadfeltlike
Vikter.
Butevenifhewereaviktor,
whywouldIhaveseenhimwiththeConsort?Thatdidn’tmakesense.Slowly,I
becameawareoftherolledblanketsunderhalfmybody,andthetoastyheat
pressedtomyfrontandback.Allthoughtsofthestrangedreamvanished.
Mycheekwasnestledinthe
crookofCasteel’sshoulder,andIwastangledupwithhimasifIweresome
kindoftreebear,mylegtossedoverhis,andhisarmcurledaroundmywaist.
Heheldmetightly,asifeveninsleep,hewasafraidIwouldsomehowslip
awayfromhim.
Buthewasn’ttheonlysourceof
heat.
Idraggedinadeep,heady
breaththatcarriedthescentofspice,lushpine,andearthycedarandwasimmediately
remindedofthemist-heavynightintheSkotosMountains.
Kieransleptbehindme.
Ididn’tknowwhenhe’djoined
us,buthislegwastuckedbetweenmine,hisarmjustbelowCasteel’sonmy
hip.Myeyesflutteredopen.Inthefaintmoonlightseepingthroughthecanvas
ofthetent,IsawmyhandandKieran’s,hisrestingbelowmineonCasteel’s
stomach.
Therewasnospacebetweenthe
threeofus.Notevenaninch.Ifelteachoftheirbreaths,steadyanddeep,and
wassureifIconcentratedhardenough,Iwouldlearnthatlikeourhearts,our
breathsweresettothesamepattern.
Iknewthen,likethenightin
themountains,thatIhadturnedtoCasteel,andsohadKieran.Casteelhadhis
owngravitationalpullthatwebothrespondedtoinsleep.Also,likethatnight,
nothingfeltsinfulabouthowwewere…snuggledtogether.Theonlything
differentnowwasthatitfeltnatural.Well,thatandthefactthatwewere
Joined.
Iwaitedforembarrassmenttocreep
in.Soldiersandwolvenwereallaroundus.ManyhadtoknowthatKieranhad
enteredthetent,buttherewasnoshame.Instead,itfeltasifitweremeant
tobethisway.AndthinkingthatwasasuresignthatIshouldprobablymake
myselfgobacktosleep.
Orpunchmyself.
Becauseitsoundedsilly.
CouldIknockmyselfout?
Gods,Iwasalmostwillingto
findout.
Iclosedmyeyes,butsleep
didn’tcome,nomatterhowwarmIwas.OrhowsafeIfeltnestledbetweenthem.
Itwaseasytoforgetwhatawaited.
Kieranmovedbehindme,andmy
breathsnaggedinmychest.ThefursCasteelhadtuckedaroundmewerebetween
Kieranandme,buttheslightshiftofhisbodycausedhislegtoslidefarther
betweenmine.HismovementstirredCasteelenoughthathisarmtightenedaround
me,hisfingerspushingintomyhipforafewbriefseconds.Ibitdownonmy
lipasmypulseskitteredatthepressofKieran’sthighandthefeelof
Casteel’sbodyagainstmine.Arushofshiveryawarenesssweptthroughme.I
keptmyeyesclosedasI…
Ididn’tknowwhatIwasdoing,
butmymindhadshamefullyskippeditswaybacktothenightonthebanksofthe
RiverofRhainasmyfingerscurledagainstCasteel’sstomach.Kieransettled
afterafewseconds,hischestrisingandfallingsteadilyasIlaythere,completely
still.
Secondstickedintominutes,and
mymindbegantowanderwiththesoundofrustlingleavesandthemuffledsnores
ofthoseluckyenoughtosleep.Somethingoccurredtomethen.Ofallthetimes
thatKieranhadsleptbesidemewhileCasteelwasgone,he’donlybeeninhis
mortalformonce,andthatwasthenightI’daskedhimtoputmeintheground
ifIbecamesomethingtofear.Ididn’tknowwhatitmeantorifitsaid
anythingatall.Butnothingandeverythinghadchangedbetweenthethreeofus
sincetheJoining.Ourrelationshipremainedasithadbeen,buttherewasan
intimacynowthathadn’tbeentherebefore.Acloseness.Abondwewere
remindedofeverytimeIfeltourheartsbeatingintandem.IreallywishedIwas
asleepandnotthinking—
Fingerstouchedmychin,startling
me.Myeyesflewopenasmyheadwastiltedback.Thefaintburnofgoldpierced
theshadowsofthenight.MyheartspedupasCasteeldrewhisthumbalongmy
lowerlip.Istartedtoapologizeforwakinghim,butheloweredhishead,
brushinghislipsacrossmine.Thekisswassoftandsoverysweet.Icouldnever
pickafavoritekissofhis,butthese…thesewerespecial,tastingof
loveanddevotion.
Butsowerethedeeperkisses,
thedarkonesfullofneedandyearning.Andthatwaswhatthiskissbecame.His
tongueslippedbetweenmylipsandmovedagainstmine,silencinganysoundI
would’vemade.Hisarmtightenedaroundmywaist,hisfingersatmyhip
pressinginharder,drawingmeevencloserandsendingawhollyill-advisable
dartofwantonpleasurethroughme.
Casteel’slipsleftmine,but
theydidn’tgofar.“Sleep,myQueen.”
“Bothofyouneedtogotosleep.”
Kieran’slowvoicerumbledagainstmyback.
Myeyeswentwide,evenasIfelt
Casteel’slipscurveintoagrinagainstmine.“Sleep,”herepeated,kissingme
oncemorebeforeguidingmycheekbacktohisshoulder.Hishandleftmychin
andsliddownhischesttomyhand.ToKieran’sbeneathmine.Tobothofours.
Casteelhadn’tusedcompulsion,butmyeyesshut,andIdriftedbacktosleep
withourthreehandsjoined.
Chapter47
WecrestedthelastoftheNielValleyjustasthesun
begantoset,turningtheskyadeep,violet-blue.KieranrodetoCasteel’s
right,andDelanoandthewolventraveledalongsidemeasthenorthernportion
oftheRisesurroundingCarsodoniacameintoview.TheareaoftheBoneTemple
andPensdurthsatatamuchhigherelevationthanCarsodonia,muchlike
Masadonia,andtheairwasalittlecoolerandlesshumid.Withmyhandssteady
onPhobas’sreins,IlookedatSage.
Thewolvencutawayfromthe
pack,followedbyGeneralSven’sandMurin’sdivisions,headingforthefront
gatesofCarsodoniaasplanned.Thedrakenremainedintheheavilyforested
areaatourbacks,sinceweweren’tsureiftheBloodCrownhadlearnedhowmany
drakenhadsurvivedtheattack.Incasetheyhadn’t,wewantedthatdetailto
remainunknown.Withthedraken’sspeedintheair,itwouldonlytakeminutes
forthemtoreachusonceneeded.
Iglancedbehindmetowhere
HisaandseveralCrownGuardsrodebesidethewagon.I’dkeptcheckingonthewagon,
almostasifIexpectedthecasketcontainingMalectodisappearsomehow.
Whichwasassillyasmostof
thethoughtsI’dhadinthemiddleofthenight.
Ourheartswerecalmaswe
continuedforward,carefullywatchedbytheguardsalongtheRise.Theirbows
werereadied,butnonehadfireduponusaswerodeon,ourAtlantianbanners
ripplinginthefaintlysea-saltedbreeze.Thesilencewasunnerving,shattered
bythehornsblaringfromthecornersoftheRise.Thesameonesthatblewwhen
theyspottedthemist.Iwonderedifthepeoplewereseekingshelterintheir
homes,hidingthistimefromwhothey’dbeenledtobelievewastheHarbingerof
DeathandDestructioninsteadoftheCraven.
Mygazeliftedtothearcherson
theRise,andmysensessweptout.Bitterfeargatheredinmythroat,stroking
therestlesslystirringeather.“They’reafraid.”
“Astheyshouldbe,”Casteelcommented,
andIdraggedmyattentionfromthem,focusingonmyKing.Healsoeyedthem.
“Atlantianarmieshavenevertraveledthisfarwest.”
“NotevenintheWarofTwo
Kings,”Kieranadded.“Mostofthoseguardsuptherehaveprobablyneverevenseen
anAtlantianorawolven—orwereawarethattheyhad.”
“They’llprobablybeshockedthat
welooklikethem,”Emilsaidfrombehindus,whereherodewithNailland
Malik.“AndnotliketheCraven.”
“Allthatislikelytrue,”I
said.“Anditmeansthatwhenthisisover,afterwe’veendedtheBloodCrown,
weneedtoprovetothepeopleofCarsodoniaandtherestofSolisthatweare
notthemonsterstheyhavebeenwarnedabout.Itwon’tbeaseasyasitwasin
Padoniaoranyofthecitiesfarthereast,”Ireasoned,thoughIwouldn’tsay
anybutPadoniahadbeenparticularlyeasy
“Wewill.”Casteel’sgazefound
mine.“Itwilltaketime,buttimeiswhatwewillhaveonourside.”
Inodded.Wehadtime,butso
didalltheAscendedwho’dfledtheircities,eitherabandoningthemorleaving
nothingbutdeathbehind.Theywerebehindthosewallsnow.Theytoowouldneed
tobedealtwith.
Butitwaswhatwaitedbeforeus
thatneededallofourattentionnow.
TheBoneTemplelinedthe
horizon,asprawlingstructurebuiltuponthousandsofheavyblocksofstone
whichheldthebodiesoftheentombedPriestsandPriestesses.TheTemplewas
astallastheRiseitself,withmarbleandlimestonepillarsthatstretched
evenhigher,andsteepstepsthatclimbedthenorthandsouthsides.Vines
smotheredtheonestotheeastandwestandhadevenbeguntoclimbthe
pillars.
“Well,”Nailldrawledasthe
groundsbeyondtheTemplecameintoview.“ItlooksliketheBloodQueen
broughtafewfriendsalongwithher.”
“Shemostdefinitelydid,”
Casteelmurmured.“Notunexpected.”
Anditwasn’t.Therewasnoway
Isbethwouldmeetusintheopenlikethiswithoutsubstantialforces.Justas
wehadn’t.
Intherisingmoonlight,the
groundlookedredbeyondtheTemple,blockingthenortherngatesandspreading
asfarastheeyecouldsee.Soldiersinblackandcrimsonarmorstoodshield
toshield,theirfacescoveredbyhelmetsorgaiters.
“Whatarewelookingat?”
Casteelaskedaswedrewcloser.
Iletmysensessweepout.A
mixtureofvaryingdegreesofemotioncamebacktome.Saltyresolve.Vast
nothingness.Fear.Ashalloweremptinessfromthoseshieldingtheiremotions.
“Mortals,knights,andRevenants,”Itoldthem.
“Howincrediblydiverseofthe
BloodQueen,”Kieranmurmured.
Mygazeswepttothefloorofthe
Temple.Icouldn’tseewhowasthere.WasMillicentwithourmother?Wouldshe
interveneonherbehalfonceitbecameclearwhatweplanned?Orwouldsheaid
us?
Casteelgavethesignal,andthe
horsesslowedbeforestoppingaswenearedthefootoftheTemple.Helooked
overatme,andItookashallowbreath,nodding
Looseningmygriponthereins,
IdismountedasCasteeldidthesame.Theotherswhowouldjoinusatthe
TemplefollowedasCasteelwenttowherethegeneralswaited.“Rememberthe
plan,”hesaid.“Thewolvenwillalertyouwhenit’stime.”
GeneralAylardandSvennodded
asNaillandEmilcarefullyunloadedMalec’scasketfromthewagon.
“Becareful,”Svencalledtous.
RememberingwhatI’dheard
before,Irepliedwith,“Butbebrave.”
Hisacaughtmyeyeandgrinned
asshehelpedNaillandEmil.IsmiledasCasteelcaughtMalikbythearm.The
curveofmylipsfaded.
“Stayclosetome,”Casteel
spoke,hisvoicelowashemethisbrother’sstare.“Don’tdoanythingthat
couldjeopardizewhatwe’redoinghereoryourlife.”
Malik’sexpressionwasstoic,
buthenodded.
“Youcouldatleastsmile,”
KieransaidtoMalikasCasteelletgoofhisarm.“Atleastyouhaveasword
thistime.”
“Gee,thanks,”Malikmutteredas
Casteelshothimalookawisepersonwould’veshutupuponreceiving.“You
know,forallowingmetohavethebareminimumprotection.”
“Howaboutyoustopbitchingand
helpus?”Naillgrunted.“Forasleepinggod,thefuckersureisheavy.”
Cursingunderhisbreath,Malik
wenttothefrontofthecasket.“Maybeit’snotthathe’sheavy.It’sjust
thatyouareallweak.”
“Saythatagain,”Hisawarned,
hereyesflashingasharpamberfromabovethefaceguardofherhelmet,“andI
willkickyourass.”
Maliksaidnothingashehelpedlower
thecaskettotheground,buthislipstwitchedasasugarytastegatheredin
mymouth.
“WhatisitwiththeDa’Neermen
andbeingamusedwhenwomenthreatenthem?”Iasked.
Kieransnorted,takingmyhand
andturningmetofacehim.“Itprobablyhasacomplicatedanswer,”hesaid,carefully
takingholdofmycrownandliftingitsoitdidn’tsnaginmyhair.Neither
CasteelnorIwouldwearourcrowns.Wewouldalreadybetargetsonthefield,
andwedidn’tneedanythingmakingiteasiertopinpointus.“Buriedindeeply
rootedissuesthatspanmanygenerations.”
“Ifindthatdeeply
offensive,”Casteelremarked,comingtousasIsmiled.
“Sure,youdo.”Kierantookmy
crown,placingitintheboxthataCrownGuardheld—amuchmoreornate,wooden,
engravedthingwiththeAtlantianCrest.Isupposedpeoplehadgottentiredof
seeingthecrownsinacigarbox.HethenturnedtoCasteelandremovedhis
crownwiththesamegentleness,placingitbesidemine.Helookedbetweenusas
theguardmountedhishorseandrodeofftokeepthecrownssafe.“Areweready?”
Casteellookeddownatme.“My
Queen?”
Mypulseincreasedslightly,and
aflutterofnervousanticipationbloomedinmychest.Theessencethrummed.
“Yes.”
“Thenit’stime.”Casteel’s
mouthbrushedmine.Hislipstastedofthesaltybreezeashetookmyleft
hand.Histhumbranoverthedazzling,goldenswirl.“Wewillendthistonight,
onewayoranother.Andthen,I’mgoingtofindthatdiamondItoldyouabout.”
Hekissedmeagain.“Butbeforethat,I’mgoingtogetwhatIwant.You.Inthe
armor.”
“Gods,”Kieranhalfsighed,half
laughed.
Casteel’slipscurvedintoa
smileagainstmine.“It’snotlikeyouaren’tthinkingit.”
MyeyeswentwideasKieran
soundedasifhechokedonhisbreath.WhatIsuddenlyfeltfromhimwhileCasteel
chuckledwasn’tembarrassment.Itwassharpandheavy,toofleetingformeto
latchonto.MyeyesnarrowedonKieranasCasteeltookmyhand.“Areyou
shieldingyouremotions?”
“Iwouldneverdosuchathing,”
Kieranreplied,hisexpressiononeofpureinnocence.”
“Uh-huh,”ImutteredasCasteel
ledusaroundthewagonandtowardtheTemple
Themomentwebeganourclimbof
thesteepsteps,followedbyDelanoandtheotherwolven,whateverKieranwas
orwasn’tfeelingslippedtothebackground.Whatwasabouttohappenwasbigger
thanme—thanCasteelandme.EvenbiggerthanKieran.Thefutureofthe
kingdomsrestedonwhathappenedtonight.Therewasnowaytomentallyprepare
forthis.NotwhenI’dbeenintheveilnotsolongagoandonlyknownasthe
Maiden.MyheartbeatasfastasithadwhenwerodeuptotheRiseofOak
Amblerandafinetremorranthroughme.
Aswenearedthetopofthe
steps,andjustaboutwhenmylegsfeltasiftheywouldturntoliquid,Casteel
halted.Heturnedtomeandsqueezedmyhand.“Rememberwhatwetoldyouin
Evaemon?”
Ishookmyhead,mythoughts
racingfartoomuchtoevenbegintorecallwhathecouldpossiblybe
referencing.
Hiseyescaughtmine,thegoldglimmering
inthestarlight.“YouhavefacedCravenandvamprys,menwearingmasksof
mortalflesh.StareddownAtlantianswho’vewantedtoharmyou,seizedcities,
andfreedme,”hesaid,touchingmycheek.“You’remorethanaQueen.Morethan
agoddessonthevergeofbecomingaPrimal.You’rePenellapheDa’Neer,and
you’refearless.”
Mybreathsnaggedinmychest.
Kierantouchedtheothersideof
mycheek,turningmygazetohis.Hesmiled.“Andyourunfromnooneand
nothing.”
Emotioncloggedmythroat,and
asithadinEvaemon,theirwordswereaspowerfulastheeatherthrummingin
mychest.
Theywereright.
Iwasbrave.
Strong.
AndIwasn’tafraid.
Nodding,Ifacedforwardas
Delanobrushedmylegs,andseveralofthewolvenprowledpastus.Iliftedmy
chinandstraightenedmyshoulders,myheartsteadyaswecrestedthetopofthe
steps.
Delanostayedatmysideasthe
wolvenspreadout,theirbodiessleekunderthemoonlightastheywovebetween
thepalestonestatuesofthekneelinggodsliningthepathwaytoher
Drapedinatight-fitting,
crimsonhalf-coatandgown,theBloodQueenstoodbeforeanaltaronceusedto
displaythebodiesofthedeceasedPriestsandPriestesses.Therubyand
diamondcrownuponherheadglitteredlikethestarsblanketingthesky,asdid
therubypiercinghernose,andthewide,jeweledbeltatherwaist,visible
beneaththehalvesofhercoat.Herlipswereasredasherclothing,andas
shestoodthere,shewasequallyasbeautifulasshewashorrifying
Mymother.
Myenemy.
Shewasn’talone.Callumstood
toherright,asgoldenasthesunitself.DozensofRoyalGuardsandknights
flankedher,andalineofHandmaidensstoodbehindthealtar,butitwasone
whocaughtmyeye.
Millicentwasdressedasthe
otherHandmaidensinasleevelesscrimsontunicfittedtoherhips.Slitson
eithersiderevealedpantsofthesamecolorwithdaggerssheathedtoboth
thighs.Thepaintedmarkingswereback,swirlingupanddownherarms,andthe
deep,reddish-blackmaskpainteduponherfaceobscuredwhatCasteelhadseen.
Oursharedfeatures.Thesidesofherhairwerebraidedlikemineandswept
backtofalldownherback,thecoloraflat,dullblack.
Onelookather,andIknewshe
wasn’tshieldingheremotions.Millicent’suneasewasstrongandtart,mixing
withtheheavinessofherconcernasherattentiondriftedoverthethreeofus
andbeyond,towhereIsuspectedshelookedforMalik.Ihadnoideawhatwas
goingonbetweenthem—howorwhyshedislikedhimlikeMalikclaimedandyet
obviouslyworriedabouthim.Ididn’tknowwherehertrueloyaltieslay,but
neitherofthosethingsmattered.
Onlyourmotherdid.
“Youbroughtanarmywithyou,
andyou’redressedforbattle,”theBloodQueenspoke.“ShouldIbeconcerned?”
Mygazelockedwithhers,andI
didn’tallowmyselftosearchforanysortoffeelingtowardher.“Youshould
alwaysbeconcerned.”
Isbethsmiledtightlyasshestepped
forward,herhandsclaspedatherwaist.“Ihopeyoudidn’tcomeallthisway
justtobeclever.WhereisMalec?”
“Wehavehim,butyouneedto
liftthecursefirst,”Isaid.
“Orwhat?”Callumanswered.
Delano’sheadloweredashislip
curledback,andalowgrowlrumbledfromhim.Ireachedforthenotam,
calminghim—soothingtheothersastheyprowledacrosstheTemplefloor,their
instinctsriledbysomanyvamprysandRevenants.
“Orwesethiscasketonfire,”
Casteelrespondedcoolly.“Andthenkillyou.”
“Youkeepsayingthat,”the
Revenantreplied,“yethereIremain.”
Casteelturnedhisheadto
Callum,andhislipscurledinashadowofasmile.“AndhereIstand.”
“ThecursewillbeliftedonceI
seethatyouhaveMalecwithyouandhestilllives,”Isbethinterjectedbefore
Callumcould.“Ineedproofthatyouhavefulfilledyourendofthebargain
beforeIcompletemine.”
IglancedatCasteel.Hegaveme
acurtnod,andthroughthenotam,IreachedouttoRune,whowaited
withtheothers.Thewolven’sresponsewasswift.“Hecomes.”
Isbeth’sstareleftmine,
travelingtothestepsasCasteelsaid,“Heremainsasleep.”
“Ofcourse,”sherespondedwith
aquickglance.MyheadcuttomyleftasMillicentquietlymovedforward.“He
willuntilgivenblood.”
IwatchedMillicentmoveforward
evenmore,tensing.
“Hewillsleepdeeplyuntil
then,”Isbethcontinued.“Nothingineitherrealmcouldwakehimatthispoint.”
“Andyet,youbelievethathe
willwakeuponbeingfedandthengiveyouwhatyouseek?”CasteelqueriedasI
inchedforward,partiallyblockinghimandKieran.
“Iknowhewill,”Isbethsaid.
IsawthemomentMalikandthe
othersarrivedatthetopoftheTemplesteps.Isbeth’shandsunlocked.Onefluttered
toherchestastheytraveledbetweenthekneeling,facelessgods.Millicent’s
stepsfaltered,andherconcernrose,pressingdownonmyshoulders.
Theyplacedthecasketbefore
wherewestood,andthenMalikandtheotherssteppedback.Imovedforward,
reachingintothepouchatmyhip.MyfingersslidoverthehorseasIwithdrew
thering.Iplaceditontopoftheflatsurfaceofthecasket,besidethebone
chains.Isbethliftedahand.Severalknightsmovedforward,theirdark,
soullesseyestheonlypartsofthemvisibleastheyretrievedthecasket,
carryingittothealtarasMillicentapproachedme.
Delanoeyedherwarilyasher
paleeyesflickedbrieflytoMalikandthentome.“Whereistheblond?”she
questionedquietly.“TheonecalledReaver.Yourdraken.”
“Youworriedaboutwherehemay
belurking?”CasteelcounteredasIsbethturnedherbackonus.
Millicentdidn’tlookathim.
“No.”Hereyesremainedonme,andascloseaswewere,itwashardnotto
noticethatwewerethesameheight.“Butyoushouldbe.”
Mybrowsrosewhiletheknights
beganpullingthebonechainsfromthecasket.“Andwhyisthat?”
Shelookedoverhershoulderatthe
clatterofboneshittingtheTemplefloor.“Becauseshedidn’task
aboutwhereheis,”sheanswered,andKieran’sheadsnappedinherdirection.
“Onewouldthinkshe’dbeconcernedabouttheonethingthatcouldtakeouta
largeportionofthoseontheTemplegrounds.”
Iglancedatthealtar.Isbeth
wasslidingtheAtlantiandiamondbackontoherfinger—Iwasn’tevensurewhy
I’dbotheredtoreturnit—asaknightjammedthetipofhisswordintotheseam
ofthecasket.Woodgroaned.ItwasunlikelythatIsbethwascurrentlyawareof
whereMillicentwasatthemoment.Shewassolelyfocusedonthecasket,having
movedtotheothersideofthealtar.Callumwatched,though.
“Nordidshementionthefact
thatyou’reaboutfiftythousandlessthanyouwerewhenyoucrossedtheNiel
Valley,”Millicentwenton,hergazelowered.Anotherknightworkedatthecenter
ofthelid,andIheardanothercracking,poppingsound.“Sheisfullyaware
thattheyarenolongerwithyou,whichcouldonlymeanthattheyhavebeensent
somewhereelse.”
FocusingonMillicent,ahundred
differentthingsrosetothetipofmytongue.TherewassomuchIwantedtoknow,
butallIsaidwas,“Iknow.”
Millicent’sgazeflewtomine,
andIknewsheunderstoodwhatImeant.ThatIknewwhoshewas.
Onesideofherlipstwitched
androseandthenflattened.“Thenyoushouldalsoknowthatthereissomething
verywrongaboutallofthis.”
Tinybumpsspreadoutalongmy
armsastheknightsfreedthetopofthecasketandliftedthelid.Millicentturned
backastheyplaceditonthefloor.Theknightsallsteppedback.OnlyIsbeth
movedforward,andshedidsoslowly,almostfearfully.
Malikhadmadehiswayto
Kieran’sside.Hedidn’tlookatMillicent,butIknewhespoketoherwhenhe
whispered,“Areyouwell?”
Ididn’tknowhowMillicentanswered.
IwascompletelyfocusedonIsbethassheclutchedtherimofthecasketand
staredinside.Anarrowofraw,poundingagonypiercedstraightthroughme,
surprisingme.TheemotionbelongedtoIsbeth.TheBloodQueenshuddered.
WhatIcouldseeofMalecwas…it
wasn’tgood.Strandsofdull,reddish-brownhairlayagainstsunkencheeks.Too-dry
lipswereparted,peeledbackoverfangsasifhehadlostconsciousnesswhile
screaming.Hewasskeletal,andmoreweatheredfleshthanman.Ahuskof
whoeverhemayhaveoncebeen.Andthesightofhim,nomatterwhathisactions
mighthavecaused,wasapitifulsight.
“Oh,mylove,”Isbethwhispered
andthenslippedintoahoarselyspokenlanguageIdidn’tunderstand.
“OldAtlantian,”Kieranexplained.
Imaynotunderstandwhatshe
said,butIunderstoodtheagonymingledwiththesweetnessoflove.The
sorrow.Therewasnorelief.Nojoyoranticipation.Onlythebone-deep,icy
anguishthathurtmorethananyphysicalpain.
“Asyoucansee,wehaveheldup
ourendofthedeal,”Casteelsaid,silencingIsbeth.“Liftthecurse.”
Isbethdidn’tmoveorrespond
forwhatfeltlikeaneternity.Myheartseized.Ifshedidn’tdoasshe’d
promisedandtheJoininghadn’tusurpedthecurse…
Ireacheddown,grabbingKieran’s
hand.Hewasstoic,hisemotionsshielded,whileCasteelwasarapidlybuilding
stormofrage.
ThenIsbethnodded.
Callumcameforward,driving
Millicentbackandaway.Herreactiontohimwasunsettling.I’dseenherhandle
Delanoinhismortalformasifhewerenothingmorethanachild.Butthis
Revenantwassupposedlyold—reallyold.Theessencestirredashedrewclose.
Throughthenotam,InudgedDelanoback.
“Liftthewoundedarm,”Callum
requestedwithapleasantsmile.TheRevenantwasutterlyunfazedbythe
wolven’sandElementals’glares.
IletgoofKieran’shand,and
hedidasCallumrequested.TheRevenantcockedhisheadtotheside.“Themark
ofthecurse?”Onewingroseashelookeddownatme.Thesmilespread.“It’s
gone.”
“Itis,”Casteelanswered.
“Itshouldn’tbe.”
“And?”Casteel’svoicewassoft,
inthewaythatwasalwaysawarning.
“Nothing.It’sjust
interesting.”CallumclosedhisfingersaroundKieran’sarmashewithdrewadagger,
onemadeofsomesortofmilky-whitestoneI’dneverseenbefore.“Thismay
sting.”
“Youharmhim,andyouwill
regretit,”Iwarned.
“Ionlyneedtomakeashallow
cutasbefore,”Callumsaid.“ButIsuspectthereisnotmuchIcoulddothat
wouldseriouslyharmhim.”Hishandwasquick,makingashallowcutonthesame
areaofKieran’sforearmasbefore.“Nowisthere?”
Ididn’tevenbotherresponding
asafaintblackshadowliftedfromtheshallowslice.Myhearttripped.Didthat
meantheJoiningwouldn’thaveoverpoweredthecurse?Ididn’tknow,andIwasn’t
sureifwewouldeverknow.WhatIdidknowwasthatitdidn’tmatter.
“Gods,”Naillmutteredasthe
inkymistflowedoutfromKieran’sbloodandrosetowhereitdisappearedinto
thenight.
“Thereyougo.”Callumdropped
Kieran’sarm,sheathingthestrangedaggerashesmiledbrightly.
“That’sit?”Casteelasked.
TheRevenantnodded.
Kieran’sarmflewoutina
flash.Isawaglintofbloodstone,andthenthehiltofthedaggerwasflush
withCallum’schest.“Thankyou,”hegrowled,jerkingthedaggerupandout.
“Fucker.”
Callumstaggeredback.Blood
trickledfromhismouth.“Godsdamnit…”
Aroughlaughcamefrom
MillicentasCallumhitthefloor.“Nevergetsold,”shesaid,steppingoverhis
body.“Herecoversfast,though.Goforhisstupidheadnexttime.”
“Advicetakenandaccepted,”Kieran
muttered,glancingatmeasIfoldedmyhandoverhisarm.“I’mfine—”He
sighedasthehealingwarmthhithim.HiseyesflickedtoCasteel.
“Letherdoherthing,”Casteel
replied,hisfocusnowonIsbeth.“Itmakesherfeelgood.”
Kieranquietedthen,andwhenI
liftedmyhand,therewasnomark.“Youdofeelfine?”Iasked,nottrustingthe
Revenantatall.
Henodded.
“He’sfine,”Millicentsnapped.“Unlike
theQueen,whoappearssecondsfromclimbingintothecasket.”
“Wouldthatbeabadthing?”Emil
asked.
Achokedlaughleftme,thesound
quicklyfadingasIsawthatIsbethleanedoverMalec’sbody.
“He’smyheartmate—apartofme.
Myheart.Mysoul.He’smyeverything.IfNyktoshadgrantedusthetrials,wewould
betogether.”
“AndrulingoverAtlantia?”
Casteelsurmised.
“Idon’tthinkso.Hewasdone
withthatgodsforsakenkingdom,”shesaid.“Wewould’vetraveledtherealm,found
aplacethatwewereatpeacewith.There,wewould’vestayed.Together.With
ourson.Ourchildren.”
Whoknewifwhatshespokewas
truetoanyonebuther,butitwaspainfultowitness,nonetheless.
Isbethsmoothedapalmover
Malec’scheek,herhandtremblingasshebentoverhimmore,hermouthinchesfrom
hisdry,palelips.“IloveyounowasmuchasIlovedyouthenwhenoureyes
firstmetintherosegardens.Iwillalwaysloveyou,Malec.Always.”
Ishiftedundertheweightofthe
rawtideofemotionthatIsbethdidnothingtoshield.Tearsrolleddownher
cheeks,leavingfainttracksinthepalepowdershewore.
“Youknowthat,right?”Hervoice
hadloweredasshereachedforthejeweledbeltatherwaist.“Youhaveto,
evennow,asyousleepsodeeply.YouhavetoknowhowmuchIloveyou.”
Isbeth’sfingerstraileddownthesideofhisneckasshepressedakisstohis
stilllips.
“That’sreallydisgusting,”
mutteredEmil.
Itwas.
Anditwasalsosad.Asterrible
andeviltothecoreasIsbethwas,shestillloveddeeplyandpainfully.It
wouldhurtevenmorewhensherealizedthatwehadnointentionofallowingher
tokeephim.
“Fuckboyisawake,”Kieran
mutteredasCallumslowlyclimbedtohisfeet.“Headsup.”
Casteelreachedbetweenus,folding
hishandaroundmine.Hewinkedatme,andotherthanprovingthathecouldpull
thatoffwithoutlookingridiculous,itwasasign.Itwastime.Lookingaway
fromthesadsceneplayingoutbeforeus,InarrowedmysensesuntilIcouldonly
feelthenotamandsearchedoutSage’sfreshrainimprint—
“Andthat’swhy…That’swhyyouhave
tounderstand,”IsbethsaidtoMalec’ssleepingform.“YouknowhowmuchI
lovedourson.Youunderstandwhyitmustbelikethis.Thatitcannotbeany
otherway.”
Concentrationbroken,myhead
jerkedtowardIsbethatthesamemomentasMillicent’s.Isbethjerkedherarm
up.Casteelpulledmetohissideatthefirstglintofshadowstone.The
jeweledbeltatherwaisthadhiddenashadowstonedagger.Itappedintotheeather,
worriedthatshewouldturnthatdaggeronanynumberofpeoplestandingnear—
Isbethscreamed—and,gods,that
wasthesoundofpureanguish.Shebroughtthedaggerdown—intoMalec’schest.
Hisheart.
Mymouthdroppedopen.
Isbethhad…
She’dstabbedMalecintheheart
withshadowstone.
Shadowstonecouldkillagod.I
rememberedReaversayingasmuch.
Whatwe’djustwitnesseddidn’t
makesense.Notinanyrealm.Butshehad…shehadkilledMalec.Herheartmate.
“Whatintheactualfuck?”
exclaimedCasteel,droppingmyhandasMillicentstaggeredback,hereyesgoing
wide.
KierancursedasIsbethjerked
herhandsfreeofthedagger.HerbodyfoldedoverMalec’s.“I’msorry.I’mso
sorry,”shewept.“I’msosorry.”
Myarmsfelltomysides.The
shockofseeingtheglimmering,ruby-encrustedhiltjuttingfromMalec’schest
rootedmetowhereIstood.Andthatastonishmentrolled,cominginwavesfrom
allwhowitnessedit—allexceptone.
Thegolden,now-bloodyRevenant.
Callumsmiled
Anearlyoverwhelmingsenseof
dreadexplodedinmychestasCallumslowlyturnedhisheadtowardme.Heclasped
hishandstogether,bowing.“Thankyou.”
Theessencestirredviolently.I
reachedout,claspingCasteel’sarm.
“Thankyoufordoingwhatyouwere
prophesiedtodolongago.Thankyouforfulfillingyourpurpose,Harbinger.”Callum’s
paleeyesbrightenedbehindthegoldenmask,andtheeather,itthrummed
throughmyveins.“Itwasn’texactlyasforetoldorhowmanyofusunderstood,
butprophecies…well,thedetailsaren’talwaysexact,andinterpretationsdo
vary.”
“Idon’tunderstand,”Millicent
said,herwide-eyedgazedartingbetweenCallumandourmother.
“Whatisitthatyoudon’t
understand?”
“Everything,”sheseethed.“Everything
aboutwhatjusthappened.”
“Youmeanwhatcould’vehappened
toyouifyouhadn’tbeenafailure?”Callumcountered,andMalikshotforward,
blockedonlybyCasteel,whowassimplyfaster.“Youwould’vebledforhim,and
hewould’verewardedyougreatlyforit.”
Millicentdrewback,herskinpaling
underthemask.Herstarehitmine,andsuddenly,Iunderstood.Mouthdry,my
gazefelltoMalec.“Thatwassupposedtobeme,wasn’tit?”
“Yousucceededwhereshe
didn’t,”Callumsaid.“AndI’vebeenwaitingalongtimeforyou.He’s
beenwaitingforthesacrifice.ThebalancetheAraealwaysinsistupon.
Waitingfortheonebornofmortalflesh,onthevergeofbecomingagreat
Primalpower.Youarrivedaspromised,but…”Heextendedhisarm.“Butyou
weren’ttheonlyone.AslongasbothsharedthebloodofthePrimalofLife
andwereloved,itwouldrestorehim.Shejustneededyou—someoneof
hisbloodline—tofindMalec.WeallknowthatIressurelywouldn’thavedone
that.We’dhavehadtofreehim.And,well,he’skindof…pissy,tosaytheleast.”
“Whatinthehell?”demanded
Naill.
Callumcockedhishead.“Ijustdidn’t
thinkshe’ddothat.Notuntilsheaskedforhim.Andeventhen,I
trulydidn’tthinkshewouldgothroughwithit,tobehonest.”Helaughed.“I
thoughtitwouldbeafifty-fiftyshotonwhoshechose.You.OrMalec.”
Heartpounding,Ipressedmyhand
tomychestascloudsappearedoverthesea,darkeningthenightsky.Iwason
thevergeofbecomingaPrimal,anditstruckme,finally,thewhynowof
itall.WhyIsbethhadwaiteduntilthistimetoexacther
centuries-oldplans.She’dhadtowaituntilIenteredtheCullingsoshe
could…Istaredatthealtar.Soshecouldkillme.Butshehad…
Butitwasn’tmeonthataltar.
Malecwasn’ttheTrueKingof
theRealmsaswebelieved.Thisreallyhadnothingtodowithhimorevenme.
Wewerejustpawns.
Suddenly,Ithoughtaboutthe
prophecy.“‘TheBringerofDeathandDestruction,’”Imurmured,and
Casteel’sgazeflewtomine.“NotDeathandDestruction,butthebringer
ofit.”Myhandliftedtomymouth.Thatgodsdamnprophecy…“AndIdidjust
that.”
“Fuck,”Malikgrowled.
“Thisisnottherighttime,”
Casteelsaidunderhisbreath,“butIjustwanttopointoutthatIalwayssaid
youwerenotdeathanddestruction.”
Kieranshothimalookbecauseit
really,reallywasn’tthetime,andbecausewhileMalik’sreluctancetogive
MalectoIsbethmaynothavebeenrootedinknowledgeofwhatwastocome,if
wehadlistenedtohim…
No.Ifwehadknown,wewouldn’t
havestopped.Wewouldn’thaveriskedKieran.Rightorwrong,itwasassimple
asthat.
“Thenwhatisthis?”Millicent
demanded.“WhoistheHarbinger?”
“SheistheHarbinger.”Callum’s
headswungtoher.“Thewarning.”Hiseyeswidened.“Whatdidyouthink,dear?
Thatshewastheonewhowoulddestroytherealms?”Heglancedatme.
“APrimalbornofmortalflesh?Her?”Hislaughechoedthroughthevalley.
“Seriously?”
Istiffened.“Atanyothertime,
Iwouldfindthatkindofrude.”
“Nooffensemeant,Your
Highness,”hesaidwithamockeryofabow.“It’sjustthatitwouldtakeeonsfor
youtobecomethatpowerful,andthatwasifthepowerdidn’tdrive
youmadfirst.”
Thelimp,flathairflewabout
Millicent’sfaceassheshookherhead,whileIsbethcontinuedsobbing—asthe
dreadgrewandgrew.ThelastpartofCallum’scommentwassomethingwe’dhave
toworryaboutlater.“No.”
“Yes.”Callumtippedhishead
backasheeyedme.“Itshould’vebeenyouonthealtar.Thatwasthe
plan.Thatiswhatallofthishasbeenabout.You.”HepointedtoMillicent
andthentome.“Andyou.Yeah,we’llhavetodealwithyou
later.”Callumwinked.“Butnow,it’stime.”
“Timeforwhat,yousillyfuck?”
Kieransnarled,graspingthehiltofhissword.
TheRevenant’seyesclosed.
“TimetobowtotheoneTrueKingoftheRealms.”
Casteelsteppedtowardhim.“And
whoisthatsupposedtobe?”
Pressuresettledonmyshoulders.
Anawarenessthatbroughtachilltothenapeofmyneck.Thatheavy,oppressive
feeling—thesameasI’dfeltthenightthatVessahadstruckdownthedraken,
andinthewoodsoutsideofThreeRivers—cloakedmyskin.I’dfeltitbefore
whenwewereinStonehillandI’dheardthatvoiceurgingmetolose
control.
ThesameoneI’dheardthat
nightinLockswoodwhenI’dbeenfloatinginthenothingness.
“He’sbeenwaiting.”Callum
ignoredKieran,hischindipped,eyeseagerandvoicesoft,fullofworship—so
verymuchlikethePriestsandPriestessesinOakAmbler.“Thiswholetime,hetoo
hassleptfitfully.KeptwellfedundertheTempleofTheon.”
Kieran’sskinblanchedasa
shudderrockedme.“Thechildren,”Igasped.“TheextraRite.”
“Hehadtobestrongenoughto
awaken,andhewas.”Callumdraggedhisteethalonghislowerlip.“Whenyou
shedthemortalfleshandbeganyourAscension,itfreedhim.Andsoon,when
Malectakeshisfinalbreath,hewillbeathisfullstrength.Alltheseyears—all
thesecenturiesandcenturies—he’sbeenwaiting.Sleepingevenmorerestlessly
afteryourbirth.Sensingyou,feelingyou.He’sbeenwaitingand
waitingfortheproverbialkeytohislock,forhis…prettypoppytopickand
watchbleed.”
Red-hotrageswirledthrough
Casteel,gatheringinmythroatlikeapoolofacid.Hemovedsofast,Ididn’t
seehishanduntilitwastearingthroughCallum’schest,andtheRevenant’s
heartwasinhispalm,drippingbloodandthicktissue.
MalikandMillicentturnedtohim.
“What?”Casteelsnarled,throwingtheheartaside.“Icouldn’tlistento
anotherword.NotevengoingtosayI’msorry.Fuckhim.”
Delano’simprintbrushedagainst
mythoughts.Something’scoming…
No,someonewasalreadyhere.
Death.
Destruction.
Stalelilacs.
Oh,mygods.
Thedreadexplodedintopanicas
Ijerkedtotheside.“Kolis.”
Chapter48
AblastofenergyrippledoutfromMalec,unseenbut
felt.Dark.Oily.Suffocatingasitslammedintous.Therewasnowarning—notime
toprepare.Thestatuesofthekneelinggodsexploded,alldowntheTemple.
CasteelandIskiddedbackseveralfeetintoKieran.Hecaughtbothofuswhile
Maliklosthisbalanceandwentdownononeknee.Millicentwasknockedagainst
thepillars.Twistingatthewaist,IsawDelanoandseveralofthewolven
hunchedlowtotheground,theirearsflattened,andtheirteethbared.Andthat
lingeringenergy,itmademyskincrawlandsmelledofstalelilacs.
Graspingmyarm,Casteelrighted
himselfasheturnedtoKieran.“Youokay?”
Kierannoddedassmallpebbles
rattledacrosstheground.Ilookeddownassoundfollowed,alowrumbleofthunder
thatcamefrombelowandgrewlouderandlouderuntiltheearthshook,andthe
BoneTempletrembled.ThefoundationofthealtarMalechadbeenplacedon
shattered,sinkingaboutafoot.Deepcracksracedoutfromtheslab,forcing
thewolvenback.Agraymistseepedoutofthefissuresandcarriedthescent
ofstalelilacs.
Ofdeath.
“Thiscanbestopped!”Millicent
shouted.“Ifitrequiressacrifice—death—Malechasn’tpassedyet.Hestill
breathes.Wecan’t—”
Thecracksexploded,sending
chunksofstoneflying.IshoutedasalargechunkhitMillicentinthesideof
thehead,snappingherchinback.Shestaggered,herlegsgoingout,butMalik
twisted,catchingherbeforeshehitthefloor.Bloodcourseddownthesideof
herfaceasMalikpressedhispalmtothebackofherhead.
“She’llbeokay,”hesaid,his
voiceragged.“She’llbeokay.Shejustneedstowakeup.”
Ihopedthatwassoon.Theshaking
madeitdifficulttostand,andthefracturesspread,wideningastheytraveled
thelengthofthefloor,oneheadingstraightforCasteel.Hejumped,nimblyavoiding
thegap,butseveraloftheRoyalGuardsweren’tnearlyaslucky.They
disappearedintothefissures,theirscreamsechoinguntiltheypassedbeyond
wherenosoundcouldtravel.Pillarstrembledasthecracksspreaddownthesteps
ofbothsidesoftheBoneTemple,wheretheAtlantianarmieswaitedatourbacks,
andtheRevenantsstoodtoourfront.Bothsidesscatteredtoavoidthe
wideningcracks.
Theshakingceased,butthegray
mistcontinuedrising.Thewolvencreptforward,sniffingatthemistasa
guardyelled,“Help!Help!”
Naillturnedtowheretheguard
heldtheedgeofacrevice,theman’sfingersbleachedwhite.“Godsdamnit,”he
grunted,startingforward—
“Wait,”Casteelordered,holding
upahand.Naillhalted.“Youhearthat?”
“Please.Gods,helpme!”the
guardshouted.
“Idon’t…”Itrailedoffasthe
soundreachedme.Thesoundofsomething…scrapingagainststone.
Allaround,soldierslookeddown
asDelanoandRunecreptforward,followedbyseveraloftheotherwolven.They
sniffedatthemist,atthedeepcracksnowwideenoughtodisappearinto.
Naillbent,reachingforthe
guardwhenthemanscreamed.Aburstofhotpainlancedmysensesasthe
Atlantianjerkedbackandtheguarddisappeared.“Whatthe…?”Naillrose,his
handstillsuspendedinair.
Bitterfearstretchedsuddenly
andcoatedtheinsideofmymouth.Ispuntowherethewolvenontheground
belowtheTemplestartedslinkingbackfromthecracks.Theyturnedsharplyand
bolted,slidingsideways,theirpawsskatingonthedampgrassasthey
scrambledovertopofoneanother.
“I’veneverseenwolvenrun.”
Emilunsheathedhissword.“Notfromanything.”
“NorhaveI.”Casteelpulledhis
swordfree.
AnAtlantiansoldier’sterrified
screampiercedtheairashewaspulledintothecrack.
“Something’sintheground,”Emil
announced.
“Notsomething.”Callumrolled
ontohisside,thewound…deargods,theraggedholeinhischeststillthere,
thoughnolongeroozingblood.“TheTrueKing’sguards.Thedakkai.”
“Thewhat?”Kieranheldhis
swords.
“Itdoesn’tmatterwhattheyare,”
Isaid,closingmyhandsintofistsasItappedintotheessence.“Theywon’t
beanythingforlong.”
Callumsmirked.
“Andneitherwillyou,”Iwarned,
lettingmywillstretchouttosummonthedraken.
“Whatevertheyare,they’re
coming,”Casteelyelled,thesoundthatremindedmeofbarratsscurryingover
stoneintensifying.Hisgazeswungtomine.“Takecareofourmenandwomen.
We’llhandlethisuphere.”
Thecornersofmyvisionturned
silvery-whiteasInodded.
Onedimpleappearedbeforehe
bracedhimself.Aheartbeatlater,creatureseruptedoutofthefissure,nearly
Setti’ssize,theirhard-shellskinslickandthecolorofmidnight.Theywereshaped
likethewolvenbutlarger,andthey…theywerefeaturelessexceptfortwoslits
wherethenoseshouldbe,andwidemouthsfullofjagged,sharpteeth.
Well,thatwasawholebucket
fullofnightmaresrightthere.
Oneofthedakkaisleapttoward
Emil,buthisreflexeswerefast.Heplungedhisswordintothecreature’s
chest.SilveryeatherswirleddownmyarmsasCasteelspun,cleavingtheheadoff
oneasDelanoleaptoverafissure,collidingwithadakkaithathadgonefor
MalikashehelpedMillicentsitup.
Iturnedtothesoldiersbelow,
relievedtoseethatSettiandmanyofthehorseshadbeenuntetheredandhad
madetheirescapeasmoreofthecreaturesspilledoutofthegroundbelow.A
burstofessenceleftme,hittingalineofdakkais.Mystomachchurnedatthe
soundofbreakingbones.Theyhitthegroundbutmorequicklytooktheirplace.
Iwalkedtowardthestepsastheeatherrampedupinmychest.Anotherpulse,
thisonestronger,swallowedthecreatures.
“Incoming!”Naillshouted,grabbing
Rune’sscruffanddragginghimbackasashadowbrokethroughthecloudsoverhead,
fallingoverus.
Astreamofsilveryfirecut
acrosstheTemplefloor,turningtherealmsilverasAureliaswoopeddown,
strikingthecreatures.Twinfunnelsofluminousflamepummeledthegroundas
NitheandThadarrived.
“ProtectyourKing!”Isbeth
shoutedfromthealtar,headlifted,andcheeksstreakedwithblackliner.
Ashoutrosefromwherethearmy
ofRevenantswaited.Theycharged,aseaofcrimsonfloodingthesidesofthe
Temple.NithelandednearthesoldiersandthenThadasIcaughtsightofMalik
fightingCallum.
“Shit!”Casteelspun,kickinga
dakkaiback.Heleaptoverthecrack,grabbingmebythewaistashepulledme
behindthepillar.
Casteel’sbodypressedmineinto
thepillarasavolleyofarrowsraineddownontheTemplefloorandthegrounds.
Forthebriefestsecond,therewasonlyhimandhisscent,andthenthatsecond
ended.Iflinchedasburningpainscaldedmysenses,followedbyscreams.
“FromtheRise.”Casteel’s
breathhitmycheek.“Canyoutakethemout?”
Ipeeredaroundthepillar,getting
anideaofhowmanywerethereasanotherbarrageofarrowscame.Ijerked—
“Shutitdown.”Hepalmedmy
cheek.“Shutitdown,myQueen.”
Suckinginasharpbreath,I
nodded.IshutitdownasbestIcould.
“Yougotthis?”
Imethisstare.“Yes.”
Casteelsteppedback,turningto
plungehisswordintoadakkai,andIsteppedoutfrombehindthepillar.I
focusedontheRise,andtheessencerespondedatonce.Thearchers’bows
slippedfromtheirhandsastheirneckscracked.Theyfell,andwhileIknewmore
wouldarrive,wehadareprieve.
Turning,Icursedasahordeof
dakkaisrushedtheTemple.Theeatherarcedoutfrommeinawaveoffire,
turningthemtoash.Acrossfromme,severaldakkaisspun,howlingasthey
abandonedtheirattackonNaillandEmil.Theirheadsrose,andthentheycharged
asKieranjoinedCasteel.TheessencewhirledthroughmeasIliftedmyhands
tothoseracingupthestepsandtheothersleapingacrosstheTemple.Firenot
toodifferentthanwhatcamefromthedrakenmanifested,eruptingfrommypalms
andslammingintothecreatures.Theywentdown,twitchingandsmoldering.We
didn’thavetimetomesswiththem.“GettoMalec,”ItoldKieranandCasteel.
“Andgetthatdaggerout.”
“Onit.”Casteelcaughtmychin
inhispalmandkissedmycheekbeforerushingforward.
Inmymind,Isawtheessence
travelingoutaroundme,aroundtheTemple,whereitrecoiledfromthe
Revenantsbutflowedoverthedakkais.Myentirevisionturnedsilverasthattaste
gatheredinthebackofmythroat.Thecoldplaceinmethrobbed.Ibreathed
throughitasdozensanddozensofstreamsoflightarcedoutfromme,racing
acrosstheTempleandthegroundbelow.
WhenIpulledtheeatherback,I
sawnoliving,facelesscreatureamongthosebattlingatthefootofthe
Temple.Smilingtightly,IreachedouttoSagethroughthenotamasI
turned,and…
Ifeltnothing
Mybreathcaughtasmyeyes
lockedonIsbeth’s.HerhandswereflatonMalec’schest,movingupanddownin
shallowbreaths.
“There’smore!”Emilshouted.
Iwhippedaround,myheartlodging
inmythroatasIsawthedakkais.Theycamefromthefissures,butthistime,
therewerehundredsofthem,climbingoveroneanother,their
blade-likeclawsscoringsoilandstone.Andthey—
Goodgods,theyswarmedthe
armiesandthewolveninawaveofscreamsandyelps.Bloodsprayedtheair.
Aureliatookflightbutnotquicklyenough.Thecreatureslaunchedontoher
backandwings,clawingandbiting.
“No!”Ishouted,summoningtheeather
asIwilledthedrakentotakeflight.Thadlifted,shakingthedakkaisfrom
himasseveralAtlantiansoldiersfiredarrowsattheonesclimbingAurelia.
Theessencestretchedoutfrommeasdakkaisfloodedthesteps,growlingand
snapping.
Adarkshadowfellovermewith
agustofwindthatblewthebraidacrossmyface.Reaverlanded,shakingthe
entireTempleasheswepthiswingsbackandstretchedouthisneck,sendinga
streamoffireatthedakkaisontheTempleandthentothoseonthesteps.The
flamesweresobright,theyblindedmemomentarily,soIdidn’tseeReaver
untilheshiftedintohismortalform.
“Donotusetheessence.It’s
drawingthedakkaistoyou.Youwon’tbeabletofightallofthemoff,”Reaver
toldmefromwherehecrouched,nude,besideme.“Youmuststopwhateveritis
theydidtounleashthem.Thatisallyoumustdo.”
Mybreathcaughtasmygazeflew
toCallum.Thatdamnsmirk.Heknew.
“Fine,”Ibitout,withdrawing
myswords.Therewasn’tenoughtimetoexplaineverything.“It’sMalec.He’s
dying.That’swhat’scausingthis.Hedies,andKoliswillbeatfull
strength.”
“Ifthathappens,wewillall
prayfordeath.Gettohim.Now,”Reaversaid,andthenherose.A
shimmery,silverylighteruptedalloverhisbodyashelengthenedandgrew.
Scalesreplacedflesh,andwingssproutedfromhisback.
Reaverliftedintotheair,roaring
astreamoffirethatcutthroughthespaceabovemyheadasIstruckadakkairushing
me.MyheartlodgedinmythroatasIglancedovermyshouldertotheTemple
groundsasReaverlititup,andI…IknewIcoulddonothingtoaidthe
soldiersdownbelow.Maleccouldn’tdie.Thatwasthepriority.Iturned,withdrawing
thewolvendaggerasIthrustmyswordintoadakkai’sstomachandspun,coming
face-to-facewithaRoyalGuard.Ididn’tletmyselfthinkorfeelasIdrew
thedaggeracrosshisthroat.
Ijerkedbackasbrightsilver
flameseruptedinchesfrommyfaceandNitheflewoverhead.Ijumpedtowhere
thecracksintheTempleweren’tsowide.Gods,itwasmayhem—thesnarlsand
gruntscomingfromthefire,themistandsmoke,thetwisting,fallingbodies.
IcaughtsightofHisa,herhelmetgoneandblooddottingherfaceasshe
shovedherswordthroughadakkai.Shespun,hereyesmeetingmine.“Wecan—”
Ijerkedasherwordscutoff,
endinginagurgle.Webothlookeddownatherchest,whereashadowstoneblade
protruded.
Thesoldieryankedtheblade
free,andHisafolded,herbodyhittingtheground,limp,andhereyesopen.I
knewthatifashadowstonedaggertotheheartcouldkillagod,itsurelykilled
anAtlantianquicker.IlockedeyeswiththeRevenantwho’dkilledherand
launchedforward,myswordsslicingthroughleatherandbone.Icutthroughthe
Revenant’sshoulders,severingthearmsasthebackofmythroatburned,and
eatherpressedagainstmyskin.Ileanedback,kickingtheRevenantintothe
pathofReaver’sfire,andthenspunbacktoHisa.Istartedtowardher—
“Thedagger!”Millicentthrust
herswordintoaRevenant’schest.“Weneedtogetthedaggerout!”
MyattentionsnappedtoIsbeth,
towhereherhandwasonthehilt,hereyesclosed.Hisa.Oh,gods,
therewasn’ttime.FurypouredintomeasIcursed,forcingmyselfawayfrom
Hisa.
Icaughtadakkaiasitleapt,
bringingmysworddownonthebackofitsneckasitsclawsgrazedmyarm.The
painwasfieryhot,butIignoreditasIwhirled,slammingthewolvendaggerinto
aguard’schest.Throughthechaosofdeath,smoke,andmist,IsawCasteel
spinningashestruckdakkaisandguardsalike.Hehadbloodonhisthroat.His
arm.IsawKierancloser,hisbodynotfaringmuchbetterashekickedadakkai
offasoldier.Ahigh-pitchedyelpspunmearound.Dakkaisswarmedthe
black-and-brownwolven,takingRunedown.Istartedforward,mypathcutoffas
aRevenantcamethroughthemistandsmoke.
“Shit.”Iblockedherswingwith
myforearmasIsearchedforRunewiththenotam,mythroatburning
moreandmorewhenIfeltnothing.TheeatherpulsedviolentlyinmychestasI
twisted,kickingandcatchingtheRevenantinthechest.Ignoringthecallto
usetheessence,Ispunanddraggedtheswordacrossherthroat,severingher
head—
Ablurofwhiteleapedoutof
thesmoke.Isuckedinthick,blood-heavyairasDelano’spawslandedonmychest,
knockingmeback,outofthepathofastreamoffire.
“Thankyou,”Igasped,briefly
claspingthebackofhisneckasIkissedhisforehead.“Weneedtogetto
Malec.”
I’mwithyou,camehis
answer.
Werose,fightingourwayacross
theTemple.Delanoleapt,takingdownaguardracingalongthelowerwallsof
thestructure.Ishotforward,thrustingmyswordintoanotherjustasadakkai
tookdownaguard,itsjaggedteethtearingintotheman’sthroat.Itbecame
reallyclearthatwhilethedakkaisavoidedtheRevenants,theydidnotmakean
exceptionforthemortalguards.
“Naill!”Emilshouted,shoving
thebodyofadakkaioffhimasherose,thechestofhisarmorrippedopen.
Crimsonstreakedhisstomach.“Fuck!”Hegrunted,jabbinghisswordbackas
anotherdakkaileapttowardhim.
AndNaill…hewasdown,onhis
back,hishandsopen,hisarmortornapart.Myheartcracked.
“No.”Casteelspun,
goldeneyesflashingasabeastlaunchedoffthewall,knockingawolvenaside.
Pickingupspeed,heslidunderthecreature,dragginghisswordacrossitsbelly.
HepoppeduptohisfeetandtookoffforNaill.
“Gettoher!”Millicentshouted
asshegrabbedMalik’sarm,thrustinghimtotheside.Hisarmorhadbeensplayed
openbydakkaiclaws,aswell.MybreathcaughtasMillicentwentflying
backwards,adakkaiontopofher.Therewasnotime.
Shuttingdownmysenses,Iwhirled
backtothealtar.Isbethhadretrievedasword.
Shoutswentupfrombehindus.I
skiddedtoastop,lookingovermyshouldertoseetheguardsalongthe
CarsodoniaRiserushingthebattlements,arrowslitwithfireastheyaimed.
Insteadofatus,theyfireduponthedakkaisclimbingtheRise.Myheartstuttered.
Ifthedakkaisgotintothecity…
Lettingmywillstretchoutto
thedraken,IsawNithe’smidnightwingsturnsharplyasheaimedattheRise.
Ididn’tlookforAurelia.Icouldn’t.Icouldn’tletmyselfdothatasI
startedrunning,leapingoverabody.Mygriptightenedonmydagger.Every
partofmybeingfocusedonIsbethassheliftedthesword,herhandsandarms
tremblingasthebladehoveredaboveMalec’sthroat.MyheartlurchedasIrealized
whatshehadplanned.Icockedbackmyarmandletthedaggergo.
Iheldmybreathastheblade
flewthroughtheair,headedstraightforIsbeth.Herheadjerkedup,andthedagger
spunbackward.
“Shit.”Iskidded,slippingas
Delanocrashedintome,knockingmeaside.
AirpunchedoutofmylungsasI
hitthefloor—hard.Delanolandedhalfontopofme,andIgroaned,plantingmy
handsonhisshouldersasIliftedmyheadtomeethisbrightblueeyes.“That
wasunnecessary.Iwould—”Somethinghotandwetdrippedagainstmyhand.I
lookeddownatthestreaksofredinhisfur.Withdawninghorror,Isawmy
daggerprotrudingfromhischest.Theswordslippedfrommyhand.“No.”
Delanoshuddered.
Itappedintotheeather,
channelingallthehealingenergyIcould.Ididn’tcareaboutthedakkais.I
didn’tcareaboutMalecorKolisbecauseIcouldn’tloseDelano.Iwouldn’t.Iwouldn’t
lose—
Thefurthinnedundermyhands,
replacedbyskin.Paleblondhairappeared,floppingintoeyesthatdidn’t
blink.Didn’tfocus.Didn’tsee.
“No!”IcarefullyrolledDelano
ontohisside,graspinghisshoulders,shakinghim.Therewasnothing.Ireached
forthedaggerbuthalted.“Please.Pleasedon’tdothis.Getup,Delano.
Please.Please.”
Therewasnothing.
Tearsblindedmeassilveryfire
eruptedovermyhead,ripplingoverthedakkaisracingtowardus.Sorrowrose
sharply,crowdingouteverythingelse.GrabbingDelano,Ipulledhimawayfrom
theedgeassomeonescreamed.Emilstumbledback,hisswordsslippingfromhis
handsashewentdownononekneeinfrontoftheRevenantwhohadspearedhim
throughthechest.Kieranwassuddenlythere,hismouthopeninaroarashe
swunghisswordthroughtheRevenant’sneck.
Casteelspunthen,hisfangs
baredasheskeweredaRevenant.Blooddrenchedhisface,hisarmor,andbeneath
myhands,Delano’sskinwasalreadybeginningtocool.
“Itoldyou,mydaughter.”Isbeth’s
voicewassoftbutclearthroughthemadness.“IsaidyouwouldgivemewhatI
want.”
Thatfissureinsidemethathad
brokenopenuponVikter’sdeathtorewidenow,comingfromthathollowplace
insideme.Myentirebodyjoltedasgrief-lacedfurypouredoutofme,icyand
endless.TheswordfellfrommyhandasmyotherslidawayfromDelano.Rage
joinedtheessenceofthePrimals,pressingatmyskinasIroseandslowly
turned.
IlookedatIsbethassheraised
theswordaboveMaleconcemore,andIscreamed.
Energypulsedoutfromme,crackling
andspittingasitspilledacrossthefloorandslammedintoIsbeth,knockingher
back.Shelosttheswordasshecaughtherself.TheTempleshudderedaseather
pulsedfromme,smackingintothedakkaisdrawntome.
Isbethrose,backingup.Bracing
herself,sheliftedherhand.“Don’tmakemedothis,Penellaphe.”
“I’mgoingtokillyou,”Isaid
asIstalkedforward,anditwasthatvoice,theonefullofsmokeand
shadow.“I’mgoingtoripyouapart.”
Hereyesflaredwideasshe
skiddedbackseveralfeet.Aburstofeatherlefther.
AndIlaughed
Theenergyhitme,andItookit
in—thefierypain,theburnofit—lettingitseepintomyskinandbecomea
partofme.AndthenIsentitback.
Isbethflewbackwardintothe
pillar.Theimpactcrackedthemarbleasshefellforwardontoherknees.
“Ouch,”shesnarled,liftingherhead.
Ismiledevenasblooddripped
fromme—fromthehitsshe’dlanded—andhitthestone.Rootsspilledoutfrom
newfissuresinthestoneasIwalked,myeyesnarrowingonher.
Herskinsplitopenatthe
hairlineasIstalkedforward,anotherbloodtreetakingroot,thenanotherand
anotherbehindme.Bloodbeadedalongtheslicecurvingtowardhertemple,narrowly
missingherlefteye.Anotherdeepcutformedacrossherforeheadandran
throughherbrow.
Anotherpulseofeatherhitme
asshestaggeredtoherfeet.Idrewthatintomyselfasmythroatburned.As
anachesettleddeepinthecenterofmyback,andmyjawthrobbed.Iliftedmy
hands,andallthefallenweaponsrosefromtheTemplefloorandflewforward.
Isbethwavedherarm,sending
themscattering.“Cuteparlortrick.”
Closingthedistancebetweenus,
Icockedmyheadtothesideasachunkofstoneslammedintothesideofher
head.Bloodgushedfromhernose,hermouth.“How’sthatforacuteparlortrick,
Mother?”
Isbethstumbled,catching
herself.Herheadwhippedtowardme.“Youwanttokillme?Itwon’tbringanyof
themback.Itwon’tstopwhatiscoming—”
Awaveofeatherrolledfromme,
strikingIsbeth.Shefellback,laughing.
Theairchargedaroundmeas
lightningcrackedoverhead.IsuckedinthatenergyasIsawMillicentfighting
togettoMalec.Isbethlashedout.Apulseoflightstruckmylegandsplintered
off,strikingMillicentasshegraspedthedaggerprotrudingfromMalec’s
chest.Shespunback,landinginapoolofbloodnearatoppledpillar,the
bladelimpinherhand.
“Betrayedbybothofmydaughters.”
Isbethwipedthebloodfromherface.“I’msoveryproud.”
Snappingforward,Igrabbedthe
crown.Shehowledasthejewelssnagged,tearingclumpsofherhairfreeasI
yankeditfromherhead.RagefueledmeasIdrewbackmyhandandbackhandedher
withthecrown,knockinghertothefloor.
“Gods,”shegrunted,spitting
outamouthfulofbloodandteeth.“Thatwasuncalledfor.”
Theenergyrampedup,andI
shatteredthecrown,bitsofrubiesanddiamondsfallingtothefloor.Iknelt,
graspingthebackofherhair.Shadowandlightswirledundermyskinasshe
metmystare.“Yourreignhascometoanend.”
“IchoseMalec,”Isbethsaid,
grippingmyarm,hertouchburning.“IthadtobehimbecauseIcouldn’tkillyou.
Iwouldn’tbecauseIloveyou,”shewhispered,slammingherhandinto
mychest.
Theeatherburnedstraight
throughme,overwhelmingmycontrolasitliftedmefrommyfeetandsentme
flyingbackward.Everysinglenerveendingscreamedoutinpainastheeather
shotthroughme.Itwaslikebeingstruckbylightning,robbingmybreathand
stealingmusclecontrol.IknewIwasfalling,butIcoulddonothingtosoften
theimpact.
“Poppy!”Casteelshouted.
EveryboneinmybodyshookasI
hitthefloor.BrightlightsflashedbehindmyeyesasIrolledtomyside.The
breathItookscorchedmylungs.MyribsprotestedthemovementasItriedto
situp.Theacheinmybackspreadintomyshoulders,andallthewhile,those
lightskeptflashing,allowingmeonlyglimpsesofthechaosaroundme.Reaver
wasdown,shimmerylightssparkingfromhimasheattemptedtoshakeoffthe
dakkais.MaliklaywithonearmoverMillicentasifhesoughttoshieldher
withhislastbreath.Notasingleinchoftheirbodieswasn’tscorchedortorn
up.Nomoredrakenflew,andKieran,heyelledmyname,tooasthelights
flashed—
Suddenly,therewasnolight.No
colororsound.
Then,aspeckofsilverthrobbed
andexpanded,growingbrighter,andinthatlightwasher.Hair,thecolor
ofmoonlight,fellovershouldersinacascadingmassoftangledcurlsandwaves.
Aluminoussheennearlymaskedthefrecklesacrossthenoseandcheekandgave
theskinasilvery,pearlescentglow.ButIrecognizedherfromthedreamsthat
weren’tdreams.Hereyesopened,andIsawtheywerethecolorofspring
grass—greenlacedwithbright,luminouseather.
“Itwasn’tsupposedtobethis
way,”shewhispered,buttherewerenobloodtearsnow.Acidic,icy-hotanger
felluponme.AnendlessfuryIhadneverfeltbefore,couldneverexperience
becauseithadgrownfordecades.Centuries.
MyentirebodyspasmedasI
rememberedwhatReaverhadsaid—whatVikterhadtoldTawny.Thebeginningverse
oftheprophecy.Bornofmortalflesh,agreatprimalpowerrisesasthe
heirtothelandsandseas,totheskiesandalltherealms.Ashadowinthe
ember,alightintheflame,tobecomeafireintheflesh…
Tospeakhernameisto
bringthestarsfromtheskiesandtopplethemountainsintothesea…
Hernamewaspower,butonly
whenspokenbytheonebornasshe,andofagreatprimalpower.
“Hetoldmeyoualreadyknew
hername,”Tawnyhadsaid.
Shestaredbackatme,andIsaw
uswhenI’dbeenfloatinginthatnothingness,driftinguntilshehadappeared
tome.Untilshe’dsaid,“Itwasn’tsupposedtobethisway.”Whenshe
toldmethatI’dalwayshadthepowerinme.
Butthoseweren’ttheonlywords
she’dspokentome.Inowremembered.Shehadtoldmehername.Shehadbegged
metowakeher.
HowcouldtheConsortbeso
powerful?
BecauseshewasnoConsort.
Sheheldmystareandsmiled,
andI…Iunderstood.She,too,hadbeenwaiting.
Iopenedmyeyes,andthrough
thesmokeandmist,IsawCasteelandKieransurroundedbydakkais.ByRevenants.
TheyclosedinonthemasIplantedmypalmsagainstthestone,andmyhandssank
intotherockasIthrewmyheadbackandscreamedthename.Notthatofthe
KingofGods,buttheQueenofGods.
ThetruePrimalof
Life.
Chapter49
Isbeth’sdarkeyeswentwideastheylockedontomine.
Herlipsmoved,butIcouldn’thearwhatshesaid.Casteelwhippedaround,blood
sprayingintotheairasaboltoflightningstrucktheTemple—struckme
Casteel’spainandKieran’sfear
slammedintomeasmyarmorandbootsexplodedfromme.Myclothingrippedas
everycellinmybodylitup,andthepain—itwasall-consuming.Itwouldkillme.
Itwouldkillthem.
Mylungsseized.
Myheartstuttered.
Bloodpooledinmymouth.Teeth
loosened,andtwofellfrommyopenmouth.TheTempledidn’ttremble.Itwas
therealmthatshookviolently.Weightsettledinmyshoulderblades,
entrenchingitselfdeeply,burrowingallthewaytowheretheeatherthrobbed
andswirled.Mybloodcooledandthenheated.Ahumhitmybonesandspreadto
mymuscles.Myskinvibrated.Acrackofdeafeningthunderrolledoverhead.The
aircharged,andmybody…changed.Itstartedwitharumbleinsideme
andthenbecamearoar,likethesoundofthousandsofhorsesracingtowardme,
butnohorseorsoldierstood.ItgrewandgrewasIpushedmyselfontomy
now-barefeet.Allovermyhandsandarms,splotchesofshadowandlight
churnedinsidemyskin.Iliftedmyeyes,seeingastrangeshadowbeforeme—the
outlineofmyheadandmyshouldersandtwo…wings.Justlikethestatues
guardingthecityofDalosthathadonceprotectedthePrimalswithin.Except
theseweremadeofeather,aswirlingmassoflightanddarkness.Myentire
formwassuddenlynothingmorethancrackling,flamingsilverlightandendless
shadows.
Vaguely,Ibecameawareof
CasteelandKieran,theireyeswideandtheirawebubblinginmythroatand
againstmyskin.
Thick,shadow-filledclouds
appeared.Windwhipped,blowingmyhairbackandtuggingatmytornclothing.
Andthewind,itsmelledoffreshlilacs.
Andthentheveryairitself
splitopen,spittingcracklinglightasathick,whitemistseepedoutofthe
tear,spillingoverme,overtheruinedgroundtoblanketthebodies.
Agreat,black-and-grayshape
severaltimeslargerthanSettiflewoutofthechasmintheair,itswingsso
massivethattheymomentarilyblockedtherisingmoon.Anotherdeafeningroar
torethroughtheairasthedrakenglidedovertheTemple,openingitspowerful
jaws.Astreamofintense,silveryfireerupted,spinningintoafunnelthat
slammedintothecreaturesclimbingtheRise.
“Nektas,”Casteelrasped.
Myentirebeingfocusedon
Isbeth.Shestoodbehindthealtar,almosttransfixed.AndtheendlessfuryI
feltfromherjoinedmine.
Her.
Seraphena.
ThetruePrimalofLife.
TheoneI’dgottenthegiftof
lifeandhealingfrom.NotNyktos.Hisgiftwastheshadowsinmyskin,the
deathinmytouch,andthecoldnessinmychest.
Mywillsweptoutfrom
me,rushingovertheBoneTempleandthegroundsbelowandbeyond.Itooka
step,andIdidsoassomethinginfinite.SomethingPrimal
Powerdrenchedtheairasthe
aurarecededjustenoughformetoseethattheluminoussheenhadsettledand
turnedtoapearlescent,silvery,andshadowyglow.Witheachfootstep,the
stonetrembledandcracked,andthemistfollowedme,settlingoverthebodies
andcradlingthem.
Iwalkedforward,feetbareto
theblood,theshatteredshields,andthebrokenswords.AndthenIglided,
liftingfromtheground.Thebatteredbodiesofsoldiers,wolven,anddraken—of
myfriendsandthoseIcaredfor—rosealongwithme.Delano.Naill.Emil.Hisa—
“It’stoosoon,”Isbethshrieked,
andherfear—herterror—wasjustasstrongashergriefhadbeen,
rainingbittericeuponme.Shestumbledoverthebodyofadakkaiandpressed
againstthealtarMaleclayupon.“Whatdidyoudo?”
IfeltmyselfriseasReaver’s
andMalik’sbodiesdriftedfromthepoolsofblood,myheadkickingback.And
then,everythingstopped.Thewind.Themoans.Myheart.Theonly
movementwasthatofNektasasheflewdownthelengthoftheRise,leavinga
waveofessence-fueledfireinhiswake.Myfingerssplayedoutatmysides.
Igavesoundtomyrage.Tohers.
Thescreamthatrippedfrommythroatwasn’tjustmine.Itwasours
Thesoundhittheairlikea
shockwave,shatteringstoneandtopplingthenewlyrootedbloodtrees.Casteel
turned,attemptingtoshieldKieran,buttherewasnoneed.Theywouldn’tbe
harmedasmyfuryrippledaboveus,tearingtheskyopen.Theraincame,blood-red
anddrenching.
Andfinal.
Millicentslowlysatup,her
paleeyesgoingwideasadakkairacedfromthesmoke—twoandthenfourand
five,theirclawskickingupchunksofstone.Myheadsnappedintheir
direction,andthatwasit.Thedakkaissimplydisappearedmid-runor
leap,obliteratedwithjustalook.Nothingwasleftofthem.Notevenashasthe
waveofenergyspreadout,catchingtheremainingdakkaisandtheRevenants,
turningthemtodust.
Thebloodrainstopped,andnot
asingledroptouchedmeasIturnedmyattentionbacktoIsbeth.
“You.”Theoneworddrippedso
muchpower,somuchbarelyleashedviolence,thatacoldshiverevenrandown
myspine.Becausethatwasme…anditwasalsoSeraphena.Heressence—her
consciousness—movedinsideme.
“It’stoolate,”Isbethsaid.
AndIsensedthatitbothwasandwasn’t.Shedraggedherarmoverher
bloodiedface.“Ithasalreadybeendone.”
“Sheknewwhatyou
plotted,”Itoldher.“Shesawitinhersleep.Sawitall.”
Isbeth’sterrorchokedmeasshe
shookherhead.“ThenshehastoknowIdiditforMalec.Itwasallforher
sonandhergrandsonthattheytookfromme!”
“Itwasallfornothing.”
Iliftedmyhand,andIsbeth’sbodywentrigid,hermouthopenbutissuingno
sound.Nowords.Nothing.Thecloudsthickenedevenmoreassherose,suspended
severalfeetabovetheground.“Itwaslovethatmadeyou.Shewould’veforgiven
Malecforwhathedidbymakingyou.Butyourhatred?Yourgrief?Yourthirst
forvengeance?Ithasrottedyourmindmorethanthebloodofagodcouldhave
everdone.Whatyouhavebecome—whatyouhavebroughtupontherealms—willnot
saveyou.”
Isbeth’srightarmjerked
backward.Thecrackofbonewasloud,andtheflareofpainIfeltwasred-hot.
“Whatyouhavewroughtand
broughtupontheserealmswillnothealyouorstealawayyourpain,”Isaid,
andherotherarmsnapped.“Itwillnotbringyouglory,peace,orlove.”
Isbeth’sleftandrightlegs
brokeattheknee,andItookinthepain,letitbecomeapartofme.
“Andforwhatyouhavedoneto
thoseofherblood,youwillbeerased,”Iproclaimed.Bloodseepedfrom
Isbeth’seyes.Hernose.Hermouth.“Nothingofyouwillberecordedinthe
historiesthatareyettobewritten.Youwillnotbeknown,neitherforthe
deedsyou’vedoneasamortalnorforyourinfamyasaQueen.Youarenotworthy
ofremembrance.”
Isbeth’sspinecracked.
Herupperbodywiltedbackward,andthepain…itwasabsolute
Asuddenawarenesspressedupon
me.Anawakening.Onethatechoednotthroughthisrealm,butinIliseeumanddeep
withintheCityoftheGodsasNektaslandedbehindme.Apresencefilledme,
andwhenIspoke,itwasthevoiceofthetruePrimalofLife.“Iwasonce
taughtthatallbeingsareworthyofanhonorable,quickdeath.Inolonger
believeinthat.Foryourdeathwillbedishonorableandendless.Nyktosawaits
thestartofyoureternityintheAbyss.”
Thepresenceeasedfrommeas
Nektas’swingsspreadout,scatteringtheashesofthosewhohadbeen
destroyed.Inthefollowingseconds,allIfeltwereopposites.Apathy
andsorrow.Loathingandlove.Reliefanddread.Ipitiedtheshatteredwoman
beforeme,onewhohadbeenbrokenlongago.Ihatedwhatshe’dallowedherself
tobecome.
Isbethhadneverbeenamother,
butI…I’doncelovedher,andshe’dlovedmeinherown,twistedway.That
meantsomething.
Butsomethingwasn’tenough.
Iloweredmyhand,anddotsof
bloodappearedalloverIsbeth’sskin.Herporesbled.Itrembledasherflesh
crackedandpeeled,asmuscleandligamentstore,asbonessplinteredandhair
fell,nolongerrootedtoskin.
“Don’tlook,”IheardCasteel
sayingashetriedtoreachme.“Closeyoureyes.Don’t—”
ButIlooked.
Imademyselfwatchasmy
mother,theBloodQueen,tookherlastbreath.ImademyselflookuntilIsbeth
wasnomore—untiltherealmfellawayfromme.
Chapter50
Slowly,Ibecameawareofasofttouchagainstmy
cheek.Abrushoffingersalongthecurveofmyjawandbelowmylips.Ahand
smoothingmyhair.Avoice.Voices.Twostoodoutthestrongest.
“Poppy,”onecalled.
“Openyoureyes,MyQueen,”
anothersaid—pleaded,really—andIcouldneverdenyhim.
Myeyesflutteredopen,locking
withonesthecolorofhoneyandframedbyathickfringeoflashes.Him.
MyhusbandandKing.Myheartmate.Myeverything.Bloodstreakedhisface,
mattedhishair,buthisskinwasunmarkedbeneathit,richandwarm.Hisfingers
werewarmagainsttheskinbelowmylips.“Cas.”
Casteelmadearoughsoundthat
seemedlikeacrossbetweenalaughandagroan,anditcamefromsomewheredeep
withinhim.Heloweredhislipstomyforehead.“Queen.”
Ireachedup,touchingtheside
ofhisjaw.Heshudderedashepressedhislipsagainstmyforehead.Slowly,I
becameawarethatmyheadwascradledinhislap,butitwasnothisarmthat
bracedmyneck,orhishandonmycheek.Casteel’sheadlifted,andmygaze
driftedtoeyestheshadeofwinter.
Kieransmileddownatmeashe
draggedhisthumbdownthesideofmycheek.“Niceofyoutodecidetorejoin
us.”
“Idon’t…”Iswallowed.Mymouth
feltweird.Ireachedup—
Kierancaughtmywrist.“Before
youevenask,yes.”
MybreathsnaggedasIgingerly
ranmytonguealongthelineofmyupperteeth.TheyfeltnormaluntilIhita
small,sharppoint,drawingblood.Iwinced.
“Careful,”Casteelmurmured.
“They’lltakealittlebittogetusedto.”
Oh,mygods.“Ihave
fangs.”
Kierannodded.“Casisgoingto
havetowalkyouthroughgettingusedtothem.Notmywheelhouse.”
MygazeswungtoCasteel.“What
dotheylooklike?”
Hislipstwitched.“Like…fangs.”